March 7, 2016 — GH & Vanderpump Tries to Rule

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Sam is meeting Baxter. She’s speaking with Nicholas on the phone when Baxter walks in. They’re meeting at a bar that looks suspiciously like The Floating Rib, even though I thought they were supposed to meet in NYC. What did I miss?

Lulu asks to come in and Dante says of course. She sees the divorce decree. He says it seems so final, and it is, but seeing it in black and white is different. Lulu asks him to hear her out.

Sonny asks Carly if she’s going to leave him, and she says he doesn’t want to ask her that tonight. I guess that means she’s not in the best mood. She says she loves him, and he says he knows, but he also knows love has its limits. Carly says she’s hurt that he didn’t trust her. He says he was trying to protect her. She says she knows exactly the business strategy he was going for, but she hates that the business causes him to lie to her and the kids. She says she actually loves that he’s an alpha male and doesn’t feel she has the right to be angry about it. She’s angry at herself.

Lulu says she still feels all over the place, but mostly just sad about what happened to them. She says when Dante saved her life, it put everything in perspective and she realized she’s been unfair. She’s about to tell him something important when there’s a knock at the door.

Nicholas has ensconced Elizabeth and the boys at Windemere. Hayden says she knows Elizabeth is his dearest friend, but she obviously doesn’t like Hayden. She says they’re newlyweds and it is a little crowded. Why are these people on top of each other? It’s a castle for Pete’s sake. Nicholas says she seems sad and Hayden says she knows how he can cheer her up.

Baxter looks like a character out of American Psycho. Sam says she just went through a divorce and attained some big assets. She says she fudged a little, using the financial bigwig’s name to get him to meet her. He says it wouldn’t be the first time someone did that, but who did recommend him?

Hayden says Nicholas doesn’t know how much she needed that and I don’t want to know what it was. She says she called the hospital to see how Tracy is, and tells Nicholas what happened at the MetroCourt. She says it’s left her on edge and he asks when she became so attached to Tracy.

Dr. Mays, Griffin and Monica are in Tracy’s room. Griffin wants to observe the tests. Tracy is like, why not invite the whole world in? Dr. Mays says that Tracy’s MRI confirmed multiple brain lesions, which could indicate more than one brain tumor. They have to determine if it’s operable, but they need to see if it’s malignant first. Tracy asks if she has cancer and Monica says they don’t know yet.

Baxter talks to Sam about investments. Sam tells Baxter that “Rachel” was right about him and shows him her picture.

It’s Olivia at Dante’s door. She’s there to pick up Rocco’s blanket and gets nosy about the both of them being there together.

Carly says she’s angry with herself for looking the other way and enjoying the power without counting the cost. She goes over some of the things that have happened with their family and says she should have learned from it. She says after that, she hid her love for him, but when he kissed her at the hospital and Sonny said he knew her better than she knew herself, she was hooked again. He says now he’s losing her all over again.

Carly says she’s not leaving Sonny. What would be the point? They’d just end up with other people and break their hearts. Carly says she’d crawl on broken glass to be with Sonny, and that’s never going to change. He tells her the feeling is mutual. He says he needs her more than he’s ever needed anyone and always will. She asks how long always is.

Dante tells Olivia they were in the middle of something. The phone rings and it’s the station, telling him Raj was spotted. He leaves and Olivia says she doesn’t know whose timing is worse, hers or the criminals. She recognizes Lulu is worried about Dante because she loves him.

Griffin tells Tracy not to jump the gun on the prognosis. Dr. Mays says someone will let her know once the tests are scheduled.

Hayden says Tracy calls her at least once a week about ELQ. She says Tracy’s goal is to waste her time and annoy her. She says she never thought of Tracy as anything but a minor nuisance, but when she collapsed, it brought back Hayden’s father having a heart attack. She says he recovered and when she visited him in the hospital, he said he’d never leave her.

Baxter says he’s grateful for the recommendation, but he doesn’t remember Rachel. Sam says Rachel told her she ran into him in Vegas. Baxter said he was there, but he would have remembered such a beautiful woman. He excuses himself to check in with the Hong Kong office. Sam says to herself that he might be a good liar, but she’s better.

Nicholas says Hayden never talks about her family. She says her parents are gone now and she doesn’t see any reason to look back. She says she has a surprise for Nicholas.

Lulu says Dante is smart and doesn’t take unnecessary risks, but then she worries this will be the time something goes wrong and she’ll never be able to tell him what she came to tell him. Olivia tells her not to take for granted that someone will always be there and to say what she has to say while she has the chance. They hug, exchange I love yous, and Olivia leaves. Lulu picks up Dante’s wedding ring.

Carly says she knows the world is a dangerous place, and Sonny perpetuates the cycle with the business he’s in. Sonny says he tries his best to keep the peace and that if he wasn’t there, someone worse would take his place. Carly says he makes crime look good and danger look sexy and it’s not. She just wants it to stop.

Tracy is getting ready to leave the hospital, and Monica stops by. Tracy says she’ll be back when the biopsy is scheduled, and until then she’s moving on with her life. Monica says she needs support and isn’t doing herself any favors by isolating. Tracy says she’s leaving and Monica should do the same.

Griffin asks Monica how Tracy is. She says that Tracy is her own worst enemy, so she’s going to monitor things whether Tracy likes it or not. She asks Griffin if he has a second opinion and he says he has a few ideas. Monica tells him to pursue them. He says Dr. Mays won’t be happy and Monica is like, too bad for him.

Hayden gives Nicholas a first edition of The Great Gatsby as a wedding gift. She wrote an inscription, but she doesn’t want him to read it with her there because she’s embarrassed by sentiment. She tells im to read it after she’s gone. She’s going to the office, maybe just a little to avoid Elizabeth.

Baxter returns and Sam says she’s interested in having him manage her account. She asks Baxter to get her a scotch on the rocks. While he’s at the bar, she takes a screen shot of his phone contact list.

Lulu is looking at family photos when Dante gets back. He says it was a false alarm. Lulu grabs Dante and starts kissing him. He kisses her back.

Carly says she keeps thinking about Kiki bleeding on the pier. Sonny passes the responsibility ball to Ava. Carly says Ava is a terrible person, but Sonny needs to handle his own situation without guns. Using what? Balloon animals? Good luck with that.

Monica brings Tracy her anti-seizure meds and says she has to be diligent about following instructions. Tracy says Monica probably can’t wait for her to keel over and join Alan in the crypt. Monica says she’s put up with her for years and if she doesn’t like Monica overseeing things, than tough.

Nicholas reads the inscription: To my Gatsby, Love always, Your Daisy.

That’s the sentiment she was embarrassed about? I’m disappointed. Nicholas flashes back to asking Hayden to marry him. Wasn’t hat like a week ago?

Baxter is telling Sam about Asian investments, when Hayden almost walks into the bar. I guess it is The Floating Rib. What happened to the NYC plans?

Lulu tells Dante he’d said the divorce didn’t matter and he loves her no matter what, and she feels the same way. She says as long as they’re alive, they have a chance, and she wants to take it. Dante says him too. They decide to get back together.

Sonny says he’ll do what he can to deescalate the violence, but he doesn’t know how much he can help. Carly says it’s enough that he heard her. They talk about when they got back together the last time. They make some cute banter and end with I love yous. What is this? The Valentine’s Day episode?

Tomorrow, Lulu and Dante are together again, Hayden tells Nicolas that Baxter is lying, and Curtis asks Hayden if she’s in trouble.

Vanderpump Rules

Giggy! It’s just the opening credits, but omg, I love that dog. He is my TV dog crush, and next to my own, the cutest dog on the planet.

It looks like the servers are actually working at SUR. Katie blindsides Lisa by asking if she can have her engagement party at Lisa’s house. Like a kid who wants a dog, she says she’ll take care of it and clean up after it. Lisa says okay to a small barbecue. And they’d better be gone by sundown. The subject of Stassi being invited comes up, but Lisa isn’t having it. She puts the kibosh on Kristen as well. Katie is like, sorry, Stassi and Kristen.

Tom is getting ready to shoot a music video with his band Charles McMansion. They’ve spent 9K so far, and haven’t even filmed yet. An esthetician comes to Tom’s house to give Tom and Ariana facials with all the works in preparation. Is this in the budget? Tom says he doesn’t want a shot ruined by bad skin. Isn’t that king of thing that’s fixed on the film later?

James and Kristen meet at a wine bar. James has been sober for a whole week, so this is a great place for a rendezvous. In her individual interview, Kristen gloats over being able to drink buckets of free wine, while James can’t, proving once again that she’s not even human. Kristen tells James she hopes his last escapade was rock bottom. Kristen says she’s moved on and she’s happy (with some guy named Carter). They get some food, and as always on these shows, it looks fantastic.

Kristen brings up Lala. James says he’s not even interested in her. I give James the side eye. Kristen asks if he slept with mutual friend Jenna and he says yes, although he’d lied to her about it during the relationship. Kristen jumps up from the table, and won’t even give James a good-bye. Because she’s totally moved on and is happy with Carter. They talk outside the bar. James tells her he’s missed her and how they used to be best friends in the beginning. He says he misses her when he sees that little glare in her eye, and I choke on my cup o’ tomato soup.

Kristen says she’s a real catch, causing me to choke again. She hugs James and gives him a friend kiss. They go on down the sidewalk together, making me wonder if anyone paid the tab.

Kristen has been working on her T-shirt line for a year and a half now. She had a falling out with her original partner, and went into debt, but things seem to be picking up. Stassi has come with her to check on the line. Stassi asks if Kristen thinks that she’ll ever get back in with Katie, and then switches subject to Kristen making out with James in a car. She asks for details like it’s high school.

James tells Lala about the car make-out session. And how they ended up having sex on top of his beloved Beemer. Lala is like, you already have a huge string of misfortune in which Kristen is the common denominator and asks what the blip is wrong with him.

Scheana is at Katie and Schwartz’s place, helping with the engagement party plans. Schwartz says Katie isn’t giving much thought to the budget. She says Schwartz isn’t contributing many ideas. Katie tells them it’s going to be at Lisa’s house, but Lisa doesn’t want Kristen or Stassi there. Scheana flashes back to her own engagement party experience, and how Kristen created chaos with Stassi and says this is probably a good idea.

It’s a busy night at SUR. Lisa is talking to Jax on his break. He asks for Saturday night off because he’s due in court in Hawaii early on Monday. Lisa asks if he knows what the outcome is going to be, but he doesn’t. It could be anything from a slap on the wrist to jail time. Lisa says she’s glad in a way and asks if he’s learned a lesson. Jax says sometimes it doesn’t hit him until later what he’s done and he absolutely has remorse. Lisa says the only thing he does better than getting into trouble is getting out of it. She tells Jax okay on the day off and tells him hopefully, she’ll see him on Tuesday.

Some of the gang goes to the turtle races. Yes, you read that right. Stassi says she’s trying not to be aggressive with Katie in pushing the friendship. When Katie shows up, they share an awkward hug. Katie says Stassi does seem to have changed. Kristen has brought Carter, with whom Katie once had a one-night stand. Figures. More awkwardness. I think Schwatz is a little turned on though.

Kristen says she’s not thrilled with a dive bar turtle-racing date, but it’s a trade-off for stepping out on Carter with James. I think this looks like a weird and fun place to spend an evening. Katie breaks the bad news to Kristen and Stassi that they’re uninvited to the engagement party. Stassi says it blows, and Kristen says Lisa is still finding a way to yell at her even though she doesn’t work at SUR anymore.

Jax and the newly enhanced Brittany are out for dinner. More fabulous food! Brittany teases Jax about it being his last free meal and gets his hackles up. He says it’s not like he robbed a bank. They talk about the engagement party. Jax says he’s not fully on board with marriage, whatever that means. Oh, it’s the old why do you need a piece of paper argument. Well, there’s a lot of legal reasons for one. Brittany says she wants to know if they’re in a committed relationship or did Jax have her move there for nothing? Jax says he’s at a moment of crisis and talking about marriage right now is too much. I have to admit, this probably isn’t the best time to bring it up. Brittany says if you love someone, it’s important to move forward and Jax loses his appetite.

Schwarz and Jax are practicing some golf swings and Jax tells him about the marriage discussion. Jax hates hearing about Tom’s band, so he brings them up. Methinks Jax is jealous that Tom actually has some things going on in his life other than going to court. Schwartz tells him about having the party at Lisa’s place, and how Stassi and Kristen aren’t allowed to attend.

The music video is being set up. Schwartz is there to help and is impressed with the craft service table. Most of the cast is working for free and several of them are Tom’s co-workers. He’s left Scheana out because he knows it will be a grueling day and he can’t afford dealing with someone who wants to talk about feelings. Lala is featured in the video as a straight-laced woman unleashed by a sexual liberation machine. That first part will probably be a stretch for her.

Schwartz talks to Ariana about how she and Tom are being unfairly treated by the others. From what we see of it, the video actually looks pretty good.

The swans and ponies are in place at Villa Rosa. Schwartz is there wandering around and inadvertently lets the ponies into the house. Lisa appears, asking him if he’s crazy, saying they’re going to poop on the floor. She is not too thrilled. Schwartz tells her the party is going to be a “linen and lace theme,” but Lisa can dress however she wants. Gee, thanks. He talks about the food. Lisa keeps telling him how she wants the party six miles away from the house. She adds that she doesn’t want to see Stassi or Kristen either.

Stassi is apartment hunting. Ugh! One of the realtors has a man bun. The realtors leave them to discuss and instead of the apartment, they discuss the upcoming engagement party. They’ve decided to crash it regardless of Lisa’s wishes. They seem to think that Lisa would be concerned about appearing selfish and not ask them to leave. I don’t think they know Lisa very well. I’m not saying she might not let it go, but it won’t be for that reason.

It’s Friday night dinner prep at SUR. Jax says he’s leaving early to get ready for his flight. Scheana says Jax is being too nonchalant and needs to take it more seriously. He hopes he’ll be back in time for the party. Katie tells Ariana she hopes she and Tom can make it, and they don’t have to pretend to have too much fun. Bleh. She didn’t have to make that remark.

It’s time for Jax’s departure. Brittany asks what’s going to happen and wishes she could go with him. Jax says he feels like he’s in jail already in his apartment. He thinks it’s time to slow things down. He thinks letting Brittany moving in was a mistake and too much for him. I think he’s an idiot and Brittany is too good for him.

Next week — the finale (…sniff…) — Stassi and Kristen crash the engagement party, Jax fights with James, and Lala and Kristen tangle.

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