April 1, 2016 — GH Twofold & Quotable Couches

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital — Thursday

Emma has come for a visit with Anna and they’re at Kelly’s. Griff comes in and Emma introduces herself, asking if he’s a friend of her grandma’s. He says he’d like to be and that hopefully this will make it easier, and hands Anna a document.

Epiphany tells Finn that the only service animals allowed at the hospital are dogs. Paul comes along and introduces himself to Finn. He says he understands Finn is taking care of Tracy and asks if they can talk. Finn says no.

Julian tells Sonny he knows what he’s doing and to stop.

Morgan says Kiki almost got killed because of him and he’s no good for her. She says that’s insane and maybe he’s where he belongs then.

Ava tells Carly that she’s Avery’s mother and has custody. Carly asks Ava if she doesn’t want Avery to be safe, and Ava says she’s not the monster Carly thinks she is.

Kiki tells Morgan he didn’t shoot her, someone else did. She says she didn’t come all this way to listen to a pity party. She makes him agree that he didn’t pull the trigger and she says she’s going to get pissed if he doesn’t knock it off. She says if they want to blame someone, there’s a whole syndicate they can point fingers at. He asks if they can blame Ava, but Kiki says not this time. She overheard Ava talking and she knows Ava was coerced, but she’s letting her feel guilty anyway.

Ava tells Carly they both love their children, and that overrides everything else. She doesn’t want to get into the whole Avery thing right now.

Julian tells Sonny that he’s taking advantage of the situation Ava is in and manipulating it to keep Avery. Sonny pleads ignorance, but Julian brings up the black rose that was sent to Ava and says he knows it’s Sonny. Sonny says he has more important things to do like look for Carrrlos.

Anna looks at the paper and says she’s glad Griff did this and now they know it’s true. Emma asks what’s true. Anna says he’s not just a friend, but part of the family. Anna says she wants Emma to meet Uncle Duke’s son.

Paul tells Finn he and Tracy share a son. Finn says he’s met him, but he never mentions Paul. Paul asks if he can have an update on Tracy’s condition, and Finn tells him to ask Tracy. Finn leaves and Epiphany tells Paul he’s a great doctor and that’s all he’s getting form her. Paul’s phone rings and he says something about a cancellation and he’s going to Kelly’s.

Sonny tells Julian Carrrlos will be found, and he’s going to flip on Julian about Duke’s death. He says Julian is going to prison for life. Julian says he’s going to ignore Sonny’s accusations and not tell Ava that it was Sonny who sent the rose. He suggests Sonny get out of the business like he did. He leaves and Sonny calls someone to meet him at Kelly’s. He has confirmation that Paul will be there.

Anna explains that she’s not Griff’s mother, but Duke is his father. Emma says her mommy and daddy are doctors too, and suggests they have champagne to celebrate. Anna asks who told her about that. Emma says her grandpa and Anna jokingly says she’s not allowed to have it until she’s 31. Emma suggests hot chocolate instead.

Ava says she’s grateful for what Carly did for Kiki at the pier. Carly says Kiki is special and the family loves her, and so does Morgan. Ava says Kiki needs to focus on her own recovery and she can’t save Morgan, even though they seem to be pressuring her. They agree to hope for the best and find a way to co-exist. Carly says just like Ava and Sonny did with Avery.

Kiki says Morgan is the first man she’s really loved. She says there’s a wonderful person in there. He says the exciting stuff was just the illness. Kiki says it was a distortion, but he’s still the same inside. He talks about the medication and that it’s making him dull. Kiki says the last word anyone would call Sonny is dull and Morgan needs to face the fact that she needs him in her life. Morgan says Carly visited with the girls and he felt nothing, and until she came there, everything was pointless. Kiki asks if that’s how he felt on the roof and was he really going to jump. He says yes, and she tells him she never wants him to feel that way again.

Sonny meets a guy named Brick outside Kelly’s. He tells Brick that Paul is on his way. Brick tells Sonny he’ll go in first and they’ll pretend not to know each other. He tells Sonny to try and separate Paul from his phone.

Emma and Griff talk. He says he never knew his father. Emma asks why she never met him, and Griff says Duke didn’t know about him. She asks why his mom didn’t tell Duke and he says she had her reasons, but he knows they would have been good friends. He asks her to tell him about Duke.

Sonny comes into Kelly’s and tells Anna what’s going on. Paul comes in next. Sonny goes over to talk to Emma. Paul gives a sidelong glance to Anna.

Finn goes back to his room and tells Roxie she’ll have some nice juicy crickets soon. But first he has to give himself a shot. Carly has fresh towels and starts to let herself into his room. Wow. She doesn’t even knock first.

An orderly drops something and makes a loud noise. Kiki freaks out.

Carly goes into Finn’s room and is startled that he’s there. She apologizes and says she was told he wasn’t in. Seriously, should’t she have knocked anyway? He asks if it’s the usual practice for the owner to deliver the towels. She says no, but housekeeping is having a problem with Roxie. He says they do know just because she’s a bearded dragon that she doesn’t really breathe fire. She says some of them.

Ava comes back for Kiki, who is hyperventilating. Morgan gets her to calm down. Morgan tells her not to worry that sometimes he hears the gunshot without any sound. He says as terrible as it was, it’s over with, and to put it behind her. He says if she was going to freak out anywhere, this was probably the place to do it. Ava takes Kiki back to the hospital.

Anna tells Sonny about the DNA results. Emma calls to Griff. Anna tells Sonny she can get Paul to leave his phone on his table and how fast can his guy work. Sonny says pretty fast. Anna goes over to Paul’s table. She tells him she wants him to meet someone. She says she’s in a good mood today and to put his phone down and come with her. She introduces him to Griff. Brick messes with Paul’s phone behind them. Anna tells Paul that Griff is Duke’s son.

Carly says she knows she’s not supposed to ask what the lizard is for, but why a lizard as a service animal? He says sometimes things pick you. He was camping and found her. She was hurt and he fixed her up and released her, but when he came back to the camp, she was in his bag. Carly says it’s sweet — and illegal. Finn says he has no idea what she’s talking about. Carly also brought Roxie a present. She looked up what a bearded dragon likes to eat and she has all kinds of greens for her.

Epiphany is miffed when she sees Ava coming back with Kiki. Kiki tells her not to blame Ava. Epiphany says Kiki is going back to her room, and the doctor is checking her to make sure they haven’t undone any progress.

Julian sees Ava. She asks how the meeting with Hammer went and Julian says the organization isn’t going to bother her. He says Hammer claims they didn’t send her the rose. She wonders who did, but he says it doesn’t matter since it appears she’s safe now. Ava says she wants out of the business and Julian says just steer clear of it like him. Ava doesn’t believe he’s out of it and want s to know what he did to keep her safe.

Paul and the others chitchat. Griff’s phone rings and Paul goes back to his table. He says it’s good to see Ann excited about something. Paul gets a call and says he’ll see Anna back at the office. Griff says he’s being summoned by Epiphany and has to go. Emma asks if he tangos and if he doesn’t know how, she can teach him.

Sonny gets a call. He says mission accomplished and he’ll let Anna know if it worked. He meets Brick outside and says what’s next? Brick says when the DA gets a call from Carrrlos, Sonny will be the first to know.

Paul tells Carrrlos to calm down, and it wasn’t him who told the press. He says Carrrlos needs to stay away from Port Charles now. Sonny is listening in on the call and tells Brick great job.

Emma asks Anna if Griff makes her miss Duke less. Anna says she’ll always miss him, but having Griff there makes it seem like he’s close by.

Julian tells Ava to stop asking questions. She asks if he’s not taking over for her, who is? Julian says it doesn’t matter, she and her children are safe, and to just go live her life.

The orderly apologizes to Morgan for scaring Kiki. Morgan gets his medication. He says he has to get better for her.

Carly promises she’ll find someone to clean his room who isn’t afraid of Roxie. She says she’s heard that it’s the rescuer who often feels rescued. She promises to knock next time. After she’s gone, Finn tells Roxie that was a close one and gives himself his shot.

Tomorrow, Sam asks Jason what if Hayden was the target all along, Kristina talks to Lucas about being attracted to women, and Nicholas screams at Hayden about lying to him all along.

General Hospital — Friday

Dante tells Nathan that he and Lulu are connecting again.

Nina calls Curtis. She asks if he’s found out who’s sabotaging the magazine yet. He says he’s been working on it, and she asks him to come to the office.

Julian is walking outside, talking on the phone about getting his hands dirty, when Alexis comes up behind him. She says she’s been stalking him.

Lucas comes over to Alexis’s house and Kristina says he’s a life saver. He’s looking for Julian, but Kristina wants to talk to him.

Jason is putting together a piece of furniture for Danny’s room, and luckily Sam drops by to help. Apparently, he’s assembly challenged.

Hayden shows up at Nicholas’s hotel room. Or wherever the blip he’s staying.

Maxie wants to brainstorm with Nina. Joe Zee is doing a guest spread in the magazine. She says it’s huge coup for them.

Dante sees Curtis as he’s leaving the gym. He mentions Curtis seeing Valerie. Dante says what a great person she is and Curtis basically tells him to mind his own business. For real.

Sam gets the piece of furniture together in 10 seconds and asks how Jason likes his new place. He talks about someone decorating it for him, except for the pictures.

Kristina tells Nathan that the person she’d been talking about who’s sexually confused is her. She tells him about being attracted to Parker. He asks how she feels about saying it, and Kristina says scared, but relieved. She tells him about talking to Alexis and she doesn’t think Alexis is really okay with it, despite her acting all PC. (That would be politically correct, not Port Charles.)

Alexis tells Julian about Kristina coming out to her.

Nicholas asks why Hayden is there and she says she misses him. He tells her to get out and she says that’s his pride talking. She says she knows he feels betrayed, but she was betrayed by her father. She says the love they felt for each other is real and tells him not to throw it away.

Nathan and Dante spar at the gym. Dante says he’s annoyed that Curtis had a point about him not getting involved in Valerie’s personal life. He says he doesn’t want to see her get hurt, but Nathan says that’s not his call. Dante asks about Claudette.

Nina says she’s beyond honored that Joe is writing a piece for Crimson. Maxie tells him about how Nina turned the green issue around. Nina adds how she turned around the last issue as well. He says they have a creative enemy and wonders what will happen with his issue. Um…have they thought of bringing it to a different printer?

Alexis tells Julian that by the end of the conversation, Kristina practically called her a homophobe.

Kristina tells Lucas about Alexis’s reaction and how she thinks Kristina is just avoiding getting hurt by men. Lucas says she didn’t turn her back on Kristina and a lot of parents react that way at first. Kristina asks why Alexis can’t practice what she preaches and Lucas says she’ll come around in time.

Sam tells Jason about Hayden really being Rachel. Jason wonders why she would have thrown in with Ric if she has money. Sam says she’s the best lead they have for the ELQ case.

Hayden tells Nicholas she wasn’t conning him. Nicholas asks what her agenda was. She says she lost everything when her father went to prison, she ended up in Port Charles by accident, found out about his knowledge of Jason’s identity and tried to blackmail him. Then she got shot in the head for her trouble. She asks if he really thinks she planned all that.

Sam wonders how Hayden and Nicholas got involved. Jason says she knew his secret and came to the garage that day to tell him when she got shot. Sam says what if she was the target all along.

Nicholas says the shooting was an unfortunate accident and Hayden says especially for her. He says someone was trying to kill Jason and he’s sorry she got shot in the crossfire. She says sorry enough to pay her bills and bring her to his home. She says when he was hurt, she was devastated. He says but she was lying to him the whole time.

Alexis tells Julian that the woman Kristina has feelings for is her professor, and she suggested she might be confused. Alexis says Kristina has had some difficult experiences with men. Julian asks if she suggested that’s why Kristina is attracted to women. Alexis says it didn’t come out the way she wanted it to. She says if the professor is harassing Kristina, she has to do something about it.

Nathan tells Dante the situation with Claudette isn’t the same. He thinks Maxie is bothered by it though, no matter what she’s telling him.

Nina says nothing will happen with Joe’s issue. She says they’re going to hunt the saboteur down and kick their ass. Curtis comes in and Nina introduces him as their private investigator. She tells him Mr. Zee is writing something for Crimson, so that have to get a move on. She tells Maxie to take Mr. Zee to discuss concepts.

Maxie tells Joe she didn’t want to discourage him, but he says he likes a challenge. She says she wants to learn from him

Curtis says it’s not a competitor who’s sabotaging them. He says that the other magazine editors seem to think, despite the recent success, that the magazine is going to fold. Nina tells him about how Julian hired her and why it might benefit him if the magazine goes out of business.

Nathan says Maxie claims not to be bothered by his past, but he thinks she is. Dante says if he could go back, he would have told Lulu everything in the beginning.

Sam says they made an assumption when Hayden was shot. Jason says Shawn confessed. Sam suggests there might have been another shooter.

Hayden says Rachel doesn’t exist anymore. She says she’s lied and manipulated, but so has Nicholas. She says he’d been less than truthful, but she was willing to look past that and forgive him, and why can’t he do the same? He brings up the ELQ papers and she says her intention was to help him. Nicholas says even if everything was real, he would be second-guessing everything. He says all the trust they’ve built was destroyed and the marriage is over. I gotta say, he has some nerve after having her shot.

Kristina tells Lucas about getting kicked out of school and telling her parents. She says they were understanding, but if she tells them right now that she’s gay, Sonny’s head is going to explode. Kristina says she’s confused about everything, except her attraction to Parker. Lucas says it might be a one-time crush or something permanent. He tells her to just trust her instincts. She wonders how her parents are going to feel. Julian and Alexis walk in.

While discussing her shoes, Maxie ends up telling Joe about Claudette and how Nathan lied at first, but when he wanted to tell the truth, she told him she didn’t care. Now it’s all she can think about. Joe tells her not to borrow trouble. Claudette is in Nathan’s past, so leave her there. Maxie says if Joe ever gets tired of fashion, he could be a relationship counselor. Nathan comes in. I guess he’s allowed to just walk into a private business meeting.

Jason asks if the second target was Hayden or Rachel. Sam thinks Rachel, but Jason thinks it could be otherwise.

Hayden says a few days ago, they loved each other and now Nicholas wants to pretend it never happened. He thinks they should both cut their losses. She says he just wants to pay her off and have her leave. Nicholas says the prenup is invalid because she didn’t use her real name when they got married. She’s like, nice, he’s going to leave her penniless too. He says she can keep the stuff he bought her (gee, thanks), but she’s not getting a penny more. She says she doesn’t think so.

Maxie introduces Joe who needs to take a call. Nathan asks if Maxie can go for a walk. Joe comes back, saying there’s been a red carpet disaster and one of his clients needs counsel. He says no worries, he’s still doing the spread, and he’s thinking footwear, which excites Maxie. Nina comes in, and Maxie relays what Joe told her. Nathan asks if he can steal Maxie for a walk and Nina says to go and make the world a more romantic place.

Curtis pretends to be a representative for Crimson and calls the printer. He says since the magazine came to them unbound, they shouldn’t have to pay for a printer error. The printer says it wasn’t an error and Curtis asks who gave them instructions for that.

Lucas tells Julian that he and Brad have set a date and they’re getting married in May. Alexis and Julian congratulate him. Lucas has to go back to the hospital and Julian has to get back to the office. Alexis tells Kristina she’s happy for them. Kristina says Alexis doesn’t have a problem with people being gay unless it’s her.

Maxie and Nathan sit in the park, so GH can use the same set that they did with Julian earlier. Nathan says he wants to talk to her about the truth, but Maxie says Claudette is in the past, so they should leave her there. Nathan says he has to tell her because Claudette wasn’t his girlfriend. She was his wife.

Maxie says Nathan never told her he’d been married. He says he knows a lie of omission is still a lie. She says he knows everything about her, including the bad stuff, so why didn’t he tell her. He says it didn’t end well.

Alexis says maybe Brad and Lucas are adults. Kristina gets sarcastic about Alexis looking at her like a child. She says Sonny makes mistakes, but at least he admits it and apologizes, which Alexis never will. Kristina says she gets it. Alexis is right, she’s wrong, message received. She leaves and Alexis calls Parker.

Curtis tells Nina he’s found out who’s behind the sabotage. Nina asks who it is and Julian comes walking out of the elevator.

Jason says Hayden was about to tell him who he was, and Nicholas wouldn’t have wanted that. Sam says yeah, if she was double-crossing him she would have kept his secret. Wow, these two are slow.

Hayden tells Nicholas the prenup doesn’t matter because they’re not getting a divorce. Not with what she knows.

On Monday, Curtis tells Nina who’s undermining Crimson, Franco thinks Kiki should move in with Jason (huh?) and Nathan tells Maxie the truth about his marriage.

The People’s Couch — Quotes of the Week

I like their new ad tagline — Mockery loves company.

Don’t wear your Louis Vuitton’s to shove someone down the stairs. Wear Crocs. — Scott, referring to Empire.

It’s a Vanderpumpvention. Emerson, referring to The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

He can’t even walk right.
It’s like dancing with a cardboard cutout of Geraldo Rivera. — Princella and and Scott, respectively, referring to Geraldo Rivera on Dancing with the Stars.

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