May 17, 2016 — GH, Loving Wrong & Models on Deck

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

I came in late, but skimmed through the beginning online and am sincerely sorry I missed seeing Sonny bust up Julian’s place and tell Alexis their friendship is over.

Franco let Elizabeth know that Jake is with him, so at least he didn’t go over the edge again and kidnap Jake. I want Franco to stay somewhat sane to ensure his longevity on the show.

Laura thinks Heartbreak Hotel might be linked to the Campus Disco where she met Luke, although why this wasn’t the first thing that came to mind is beyond me. Laura wants to investigate, and Doc says he’ll go with her. I assume it’s no longer a disco.

And Tracy has found a baby on the Quartermaine doorstep.

Here’s where I came in.

Sam tells Michael they don’t have to miss the old Jason anymore.

Lucy overhears Doc and Laura discussing their plans and assumes they’re a couple. Doc steps away and she tells Laura that she gives her and Doc her blessing. She says she’s thrilled he’s moving on with someone so wonderful. Laura starts to tell her she has the wrong idea, when Doc joins them. Lucy babbles about how they should do a number at the Nurses Ball, gives them tickets, and leaves.

Monica asks if Tracy has called the authorites and says for all they know, the baby could have been kidnapped. She tells Tracy about Jason regaining his memory.

Franco tells Elizabeth she’s in over her head and should accept any and all help.

Julian tells Alexis they need to talk. He says he’d rather die than let Sonny harm her. He says Carrrlos is gone and the evidence has been destroyed, so they’re both covered and he’s going to protect her from Sonny. He says there’s no going back and they’re in this together. I’m sure she’s thrilled.

Carly is all excited about Jason regaining his memory. She calls Michael in. Jason tells him about a time when he was a baby, and says he’s a man now. Michael says Jason taught him how to be one.

Laura says she soesn’t want to draw Doc in any more with the Helena business, but he says he’s already drawn in.

Franco asks Elizabeth to let him look at Helena’s book with Jake. He says he knows the answer is in there. She tells Jake to come on and Jake asks when he’ll see Franco again. Franco says that’s up to his mother.

Alexis asks if Julian needs help, but he says he can deal with it. He has the shirt he was wearing in a plastic bag and she says she’ll burn it. Wait a second, why did he tell her the evidence was gone when he still had some? He tells her it’s gong to be okay, which obviously no one should believe.

Julian leaves and Alexis ponders the bag. Um…I wouldn’t throw plastic into the fireplace unless you want a real smelly mess. She takes the shirt out of the bag because she heard me.

Carly and Sam are all happy. Sam walks Michael out. Carly tells Jason that Sonny will be home soon if he wants to wait. She says they get to be friends forever now and she hugs him.

Alexis burns the shirt. Oh wait, she doesn’t. She puts it back in the bag and hides it. She looks all panicky.

Sonny comes home and asks what Jason is doing there.

Michael talks to Monica who says it’s a miracle. He sees Tracy with the baby and Monica says it’s their new house guest. Tracy says she couldn’t leave him on the doorstep. Michael asks if there was a note and Tracy says just a rattle, Michael says that’s Sabrrrina’s son.

Sonny says if it wasn’t for Jason, Dante would be dead. Jason says it the least he can do after all Sonny’s done for him.

Tomorrow, Felix needs to talk to Finn, Diane tells Nicholas he owes back taxes, and Jason has a request of Sonny.

If Loving You Is Wrong

Eddie brings some chick home. He wants her to lose the dress immediately and she’s like, you are moving way too fast. He asks her if she’s stupid and she said she was under the misguided impression that he liked her. He says he does and let’s get to it. The light bulb comes on and he suggests foreplay, which means giving him…never mind. While Eddie has his eyes closed, the girl opens the door to Julius and company.

Julius calls Eddie “copper,” a term which hasn’t been used since the 40s. Eddie tells him to go ahead and shoot, just don’t mess up his pretty face. I’m always torn between wanting Eddie gone and keeping him around for entertainment purposes.

Julius goofs around for a while, pretending he’s going to shoot Eddie and then the gun doesn’t go off. I laugh when Eddie asks if Julius wants to torture him and Julius says yes. He says that he actually wants a favor. He shows Eddie a picture of Claudia and says he wants her dead — no drive-bys or suicides, but an accident with witnesses. Eddie wants to know why, but Julius says no questions. Eddie says okay, but asks about Quan who is nowhere. Eddie asks that Quan be delivered to him as part of the deal. Julius says it’s like poker, he’ll see his Quan for Quan’s mother, Tilda. Julius says he’ll deliver both of them and Eddie has to take care of them. Eddie says done.

Eddie almost messes things up by asking Julius to “leave the whore.” The “whore” is Julius’s cousin. Eddie apologizes and suggests they stick to killing. These two were actually kind of funny together.They’re like cartoon characters.

Esperanza calls Claudia into the office. She asks if Claudia is sleeping with Lushion. She says she saw Claudia kissing him in the locker room. Claudia says that’s not what was happening and Esperanza suggests she put Claudia in for a transfer. Claudia says if she does, she’s going to complain that Esperanza is jealous about Eddie. Esperanza says Claudia is a liar, since she obviously hasn’t worked this job before. Claudia tells her to do what she wants, but says “be careful” in a weird tone of voice. I have no investment in Claudia, but I’m hoping she doesn’t get killed just because she’s one of the good guys.

Alex calls a lawyer, but she doesn’t have enough money for a retainer. There’s a knock at the door and she gets served. She calls Creepy Randal who calls her sweetheart. He tells her that the new subpoena is a lawsuit against Brad. She asks why he’s doing this, and Randal says Brad is with his wife. Alex counters with Randal having been with Brad’s wife. Randal says that wasn’t on purpose, but what Brad did was. Alex says they don’t have much money and asks him to stop. He says to come over and make love to him and he will. Gag. In lieu of that, he’ll take his son. Alex begs him to stop and he says he’ll see her in court.

Kelly paces while talking to herself. There’s a knock at the door. It’s the girl from Ramses’s apartment. She asks if Kelly has a “wine opener.” Kelly tells her to tell Ramses to go buy one his own damn self among a few other choice things.

Esperanza calls Kelly. Kelly tells her about the girl at Ramses’s house and how she came over to borrow a corkscrew. She kind of makes it up as she’s going along. She says she was stupid for liking him.

Esperanza tells Kelly about walking in on Lushion and Claudia. She says she’s positive she saw them kissing. Kelly says it was probably innocent, and Esperanza says what if the girl that Kelly saw was Ramses sister? Kelly blows this off and Esperanza says she doesn’t know if she should tell Natalie. This is an interesting scene, because they’re both making up scenarios and future scenarios that don’t exist, and it’s feeding on itself.

The captain calls Eddie and Steve into his office. He asks who was using his computer and Eddie confesses. Steve leaves and Eddie tells the captain he was running Claudia. He also tells him about the visit from Julius. The captain says when Eddie ran Claudia, all hell broke loose and now he’s getting calls from the Feds. He says something isn’t right about her.

Lushion comes to Ramses’s house and the girl introduces herself as Grace. She calls Ramses and he and Lushion discuss the house. Ramses says Grace is his cousin’s wife and helping him with the legal stuff, and that he can be out today. He’s going to stay in a hotel because he doesn’t want to be with the memories of his mother. Lushion asks if there’s anything else, and Ramses says Kelly. He says they’ve been flirting and now she’s cold. Lushion asks when it started and tells him to think back.

Ramses goes through the last time Kelly came by. He hits the nail on the head about her seeing Grace. Lushion asks if he told Kelly who Grace is, and Ramses says no, and even worse, he sent Grace over to borrow the corkscrew. Lushion says Ramses should know that Kelly was bothered. Ramses wants to go right over, but Lushion says give her an hour or two to cool off. He takes the paperwork for the house and leaves.

There’s a knock at Kelly’s door. It’s Alex. Alex asks her if she can watch the baby while she goes to an unscheduled doctor’s appointment. Kelly says sure. Kelly makes googly sounds at the baby. Alex leaves.

Esperanza goes to talk to Natalie because she can’t keep her big, fat nose out of things. She tells Natalie that she saw Claudia and Lushion “separating from something” in the locker room. Natalie says Lushion just asked her to marry him. Natalie says maybe she should have kept her mouth shut and I wholeheartedly agree. Of course Natalie immediately jumps to thinking the worst and says she’ll deal with it after work.

Ramses goes over to Kelly’s place. He has Grace with him and says Kelly owes her an apology. Kelly acts snotty and Ramses asks Grace to give them a few minutes. Grace tells him it’s not going to work for him and goes. Kelly says some woman is in his house who dresses like a whore, and he says he’s not like that and she’s here for business. He tells her not to insult him and gives her the documents that his cousin’s wife helped him with. He tells Kelly not to be so judgmental until she knows the whole story. He leaves and hopefully, she feels like an ass now.

Lushion asks the guy at the deli if there’s another copy of the tape. Deli guy says no, and asks if should he be worried since Lushion is the third cop who’s asked about it. Lushion shows him Eddie’s picture and he says that was one of them. Ben isn’t the other, so I’m guessing it might be Steve. Lushion asks to look at the tape from when the other cop came in.

The captain tells Eddie that they have an undercover in the precinct who’s investigating all the rookies who have died. The two morons conclude it must be Claudia and Eddie says he’s got it. The captain says be careful, since she could topple them all.

Lushion takes Andrew aside. He shows Andrew a picture of himself in the deli and asks what’s up and what’s on the tape. Andrew says he doesn’t know and Lushion asks why he was trying to get it. Andrew says they shouldn’t even be talking about this. Lushion says either tell him what he wants to know or he’s going to internal affairs. He tells Andrew he has no choice but to trust him.

Andrew tells Lushion about Ben’s drug problem and that Ben picks up drugs for Eddie. He says they tried to kill Pete. He says Pete would be dead if it hadn’t been for his girlfriend who put the camera in the room. He says the wall of rookie pictures is Eddie’s wall of fame. Lushion tells him to be careful. He says they’ll report to each other and no one else will know about their conversations.

Andrew says Pete has the tape because he’s the one in the hospital. Lushion says he’s working on something. Andrew says work fast or the three of them will be up on the wall next. Lushion leaves and calls Larry Lamont. He leaves a message saying he has two problems that need to be addressed right away.

Alex goes to visit Backwoods Rusty, aka her father. She tells him her neighbor won’t leave her alone.

Next time, Marcie visits Alex, Rusty goes after Randal, and Lushion meets with Claudia and Ramses.

Below Deck: Mediterranean

Bryan tells Hannah it’s not the time or place to be dressing down an employee, adding that she’s drunk. Hannah is offended and appalled by this, but she is drunk. As he said last episode, she doesn’t seem to get that he’s her boss.

Danny brings some girls back to the boat. This is a huge no-no, but all Hannah tells them is to stay out of the guest cabins. Danny breaks out some Patron. In the galley, Ben is cooking octopus. I stopped eating octopus after I saw one that was capable of using a camera.

Hannah tells Danny and group they have five minutes. Bobby is with them and says his career is important to him, so the girls have to leave. Bye, Felicias! Bryan hears them discussing the girls, and says he’s been put in an awkward position.

It’s 24-hours until charter and everyone is hung over. Jen isn’t sure if things are resolved with Hannah, but she doesn’t care. Bryan goes to the captain and asks to confirm the policy for guests on the boat. Captain Mark says the yacht is their work place, not their home, and it’s not cool unless he knows about it. Bryan tells him what happened. He wants to be transparent with the captain and doesn’t want to risk his own job to save the other guys’ asses. The captain says Bobby, who’s also a firefighter, wouldn’t bring girls back to the firehouse, which is a good analogy.

Hannah claims she’s not trying to be a bitch, just trying to do her job, and sometimes being a bitch is part of it. Tiffany is glad she doesn’t want to rehash the lecture at the bar.

The captain calls the guys to the wheelhouse. He says apparently his instruction on no partying on the boat didn’t sink in. Bryan says he’s partly responsible and the captain agrees. He’s not too happy to hear about Danny giving out the boat’s liquor either. He gives them extra work, and tells them it’s their first strike, and with three, they’re out. Captain Mark speaks to Bryan afterward and asks if he knew about the liquor. Bryan says no.

A sports-bar called The Tilted Kilt has chartered the yacht for a photo shoot. Captain Mark emphasizes no fraternization with the guests. The primary is Katie, who is kind of like their den-mother. Right away Hannah looks down her nose at the guests, and says they won’t be expecting as top-notch work. The deckhands are especially happy that they will have a boat full of models and Jen says they’re acting like they’ve never seen girls before. Bryan tells them do not cross the line, especially after what just happened.

Danny video chats with his mom. His father is an alcoholic and he had to be the family’s main support at a young age, which might explain his emotional immaturity.

Julia says they’re not lowering their standards, just simplifying. Bryan tells Jen she seems disconnected and she says she woke up late. Jen thinks Bryan overcompensates for his lack of abilities. It’s time to greet the guests, so the crew gets into their dress whites.

The girls board the boat and the guys get stupid. Hannah shows them around the yacht. Lots of squealing and giggling. The girls seem sweet, but Hannah makes a lot of snide comments in her interview segments.

Lunch is served and of course it’s phenomenal. Compliments to the chief, who says it’s a happy bunch. They drop anchor and the girls get into their bikinis and park on the sun deck. Danny is smiling so hard, my face hurts. The photographer arrives. The girls ask Hannah if they can have a special surprise cake for Katie’s birthday. Chef Ben says he’s not a pastry chef, but it will be good practice.

The photographer makes the girls giggle. They oil up and pose on the deck. Danny inserts himself into their conversations. One of the girls is really amazing with the hula hoop. Danny thinks so too, and Bryan gets pissed because he’s not where he’s supposed to be. He flirts with one of the models, which Bryan likes even less. The photographer leaves and is meeting them on shore the next day.

The table is set for dinner and it’s beautiful, with gold place settings. In stark contrast, the guest cabins look like suitcases exploded in them. Uh-oh, one of the girls asks another one about her and Danny while Hannah is serving. I’m pretty sure that’s not good. Danny is on late watch.

The girls want a late night snack and Ben gets up to deal with it. They’re seriously impressed, because they would have been fine with a Tupperware container full of leftovers, and he’s made them a mini feast.

One of the girls is hanging out on the couch and Danny is flirting. Bobby comes in and tells him they have to do yada, yada, yada, and Danny hugs the girl good-night. Bobby is like, this is so not cool after what just happened and the captain lecturing them.

Damn. Danny pops back in after he’s done with whatever, and chats up the girls. Hannah says the reason the girls are still up is because of him, and she wants to go to bed. Hannah takes him aside and asks him to knock it off.

The photographer is there bright and early. Danny is still sleeping, which is not going over well with Bryan. When he finally gets up, he makes a beeline for the girls who are getting ready for the shoot. He takes a selfie with one of them. Bryan tells him he doesn’t want to see his phone again and it’s not middle-school summer camp.

Small boats are taken to transport the models, crew and lunch to an island. The photos are taken and lunch is eaten. Tiffany is happy because she’s getting along better with Hannah. Bobby organizes a touch football game on the beach while Danny flirts with one of the girls. She wants to sneak off. He says he knows he shouldn’t, but he has butterflies. Oh please.

Next time, Julia finds the guys distracting, Bryan calls out Danny, and the captain lectures Danny. Week two of Danny.

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