June 28, 2016 – GH, Below Deck Girls’ Retreat, Haves & Not So Much

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Kristina leaves a message for Parker while strolling through the park. Aaron comes up behind her and asks who Parker is.

Dante and Lulu toast to their new home. Dante adds, to a drama free closing. Good luck with that. Lulu says she has so many things to be thankful for, but misses Nicholas.

Some guy comes to the door of the shed. Jason says he’s looking for some people and maybe the guy can help.

Nicholas, who has chartered a plane, tells Ava that he’s had a couple of fortune reversals lately, one of which came from Hayden. Ava says she thought they weren’t getting along and he says it wasn’t exactly voluntary. He tells her he’s had a change of heart though, and he’s going to Greece without her.

Julian goes back and forth in his head about loving Alexis and killing her. She tells him she didn’t hear him come in and the bath is making her feel better. The doorbell rings. It’s Sonny. Alexis asks what Julian wanted and he says nothing really, and she goes to answer the door.

Alexis tells Sonny it’s not a good time. He wants to know why she’s still protecting Julian and she says he’s not helping. He says she’s not just hurting herself, she’s hurting Kristina. Julian comes downstairs and Sonny wants to know what he’s doing there. Um…it’s his house.

Ha-ha! Kristina and Aaron’s feet are so loud on the pathway, we can barely hear their conversation. Hello? Sound person? Kristina tells him about her mother. He says he’s not trying to be nosy, but from the tone of her voice, he was curious as to who Parker is. He said it sounded like she was leaving a message for a boyfriend. She says trust her, Parker isn’t a boyfriend.

Lulu asks Dante if he thinks Nicholas is still alive and he says no because he stinks as a cop. She says she’s been moving in that direction too, and once she and Laura accept it, they’ll have to consider living without Nicholas for the rest of their lives and she’s not ready for that.

Ava tells Nicholas that she was going to give the statue copy to a London dealer and if he couldn’t authenticate it, that would be his problem. Nicholas tells her again, she’s not coming with him, but she voices her concern about Hux following her.

Jason describes Ava and Nicholas to the guy, who says he hasn’t seen them. Jason thanks him, and starts to leave, but dude pulls out a gun and says Jason isn’t going anywhere.

Aaron says Kristina is obviously reaching out to someone she cares about. She tells him Parker is her ex, but technically, they never even started. She says they’re the definition of “it’s complicated.” Aaron is like okay, and Kristina is surprised he’s not bugging her for more information. He says his ex called him recently about an emergency, and during the conversation, he realized why he fell for her, but also why they broke up. Kristina thanks him for being cool about things. He says she has a friend in him and asks if she’d like a ride home.

Sonny asks what kind of husband would let his wife take a murder rap for him. He says he has to do what he can to protect his daughter and niece. Alexis tells them both to shut up and says their grandstanding and chest thumping isn’t what she needs. She says she wants Julian out and she’ll pack up his stuff. Sonny tells Julian he’s a psycho and Alexis is going to get to the point where she doesn’t want to save him anymore. Julian leaves.

Sonny asks Alexis what she’s thinking by being alone with Julian. Alexis says she was working him until Sonny blew it for her.

Nicholas asks what Ava’s long term plans are. He says Hux will track her down if she goes back home, but she says by the time she gets back to Port Charles, the real statue will be in the hands of a high-profile dealer and Hux won’t be able to do anything. She needs a place to lay low in the meantime.

Jason tells dude (who I wish had a name) that he doesn’t want any trouble. He assumes the guy works for Hux, who doesn’t want any witnesses to his kidnapping of Ava and Nicholas. Dude tells him right on the first try.

Sonny asks what he plan was and Alexis says she was recording him. She says Julian out-maneuvered her and her only way out was getting a confession. Sonny says the only way Julian knows he’ll be safe is killing her. Alexis says he’d never do that, because then he’d be the number one suspect. Sonny says again that Julian is only safe with her out of the way.

Julian sits at the bar downing shots. Lulu tells Dante she’ll have to call Lucky and tell him about Nicholas. She says living in denial is easier because with no body, there’s a chance. Hey, on this show, you can have a body and still have a chance.

Ava says if Nicholas wanted to, he could make up a plausible cover story and go back to Port Charles.

Jason distracts the gunman and then struggles with him. The gun goes off. How predictable was that?

Alexis says Julian is a monster. Sonny adds he’s a coward with no code. Alexis is like, oh, I guess a code makes you better mobster. Sonny says he might not be the best guy, but he doesn’t murder his friends and pin it on his wife. Alexis says they all live in glass houses and insists Julian isn’t going to kill her. She says she needs o find a way to clear her name and salvage some aspect of her life.

Aaron and Kristina flirt. Then they kiss. Kristina pulls away and Aaron asks if he did something wrong. She says she just wants to check on her mom. He asks if he can see her later and she tells him to text her and leaves.

Ava makes up a story for Nicholas about how he got picked up by a freighter and had memory problems when he came to. He says he already did once, and she says good, then he has a history. When he gets back he’ll be welcomed with open arms and he can say a *burglar pushed him out the window. Nicholas says if he goes back, he goes back to the reasons he left, and it’s better he remain dead.

*Ava actually used the word robber, but having been burgled, I know there’s a difference. A robber is someone who steals from a person; a burglar breaks into your house. In the made up story, Nicholas would have been surprised by a burglar. I know this is nit-picky, but I’ve been watching this for 50 years.

The gun is on the floor and Jason is still struggling with the guy. Jason gets the gun. And shoots.

Breaking news. Because nothing can ever wait until 4 o’clock. A whole 15 minutes from now. Explosions in Istanbul’s airport. Well, that’s not good, although I still think it could have waited. To ABC’s credit, we’re back quickly. They know how the fans can get.

Julian is still drinking when we get back. He thinks about how he almost killed Alexis. Sonny enters. Dante and Lulu tell him about the house and he acts surprised. I note that Sonny is aging really, really well and looks fit and tan. It pays to be in the coffee business. He calls Max, telling him Julian is where he said he would be, and to tell Diane thanks about Dante and Lulu’s house.

Sonny approaches Julian, who asks if Sonny is stalking him. He says obviously coming here was a mistake and Sonny says it’s not his first one.

Ava asks how long before they board. She’s all nervous, and Nicholas says it’s a private gate and Hux can’t follow them there. He says he hopes she understands he wants to keep things on the down low. They sort of flirt a little. Ava says she enjoys living off the grid with him because they have no history. She says with him, she’s a blank slate. I’m noting how much new Nicholas looks like Matthew Perry in the new Odd Couple. Which I highly recommend. I’m not much of a sitcom person, but it’s as funny as the old one. Maybe more so.

Okay, I guess Jason shot past the guy. He makes dude get on the floor, hands behind his back, and ties his hands together. He tells him to get up and I’m very impressed at how deft he is in doing it.

Dante asks Lulu if she wants him to call Lucky to come back to Port Charles. She says Lucky is a restless soul and spends most of his time in Africa helping refugees. She doesn’t think it’s a good idea to call him back, and that sometimes you have to accept what makes people happy. She says talking about Lucky makes her miss Nicholas more and that he saved her life once. Dante says without Nicholas, there would be no “us.” She says maybe they can name their next baby after him and Dante agrees. I’m almost sad, even though I know Nicholas is very much alive.

Jason tells dude to tell Hux that Ava and Nicholas are no longer his problem, and if he sees Hux around, he’s going to put a bullet in his head. Instead of being grateful Jason didn’t kill him, dude complains about being left with only his hands tied. Geez, count your blessings. Jason leaves with the gun.

Nicholas says Hux can’t search everywhere and she should book a flight to somewhere like Bali and leave him to clean up his own mess. She says she’s enjoyed traveling with Nicholas. He says he’s enjoyed her unexpected company and wouldn’t mind continuing on with her. The plane is ready. They both board.

Alexis tries asking Kristina about her life, but Kristina is too freaked, wondering why they didn’t arrest Julian. Alexis says they’ll find a way to prove he did it, but they have to stay calm in the meantime. She says it’s actually making her sick to her stomach and I have a flash of an idea that she’s pregnant.

What? Sonny read my mind. He asks Julian what man would let his pregnant wife stand trial. I guess she told him this off-screen? Or is he that good at picking up on it?

Tomorrow, Nathan almost sees Maxie’s wedding dress, Dillon doesn’t want to give up Kiki without a fight, Sonny tells Julian not to touch him, and Alexis admits she’s pregnant. I guess she is doomed to have mobsters’ children.

Below Deck Mediterranean

Danny tells Hannah she has an ugly personality and she responds like and adult, saying Danny is the one everybody hates. Bobby and Bryan insult Danny when he comes back to the table. Hannah talks to Julia and says Danny creates drama. She brings up that he took Ben’s side in an argument, like anyone cares. She says she’s going to go out of her way to annihilate him. Maybe these people shouldn’t drink. Ben tells Danny to cool it or he won’t be able to help in the galley anymore.

Julia and Jen decide to put a condom on an exceptionally long cucumber or zucchini or something. Bobby calls it Sex Ed 101, but I call it Boredom 101.

Hannah asks Ben to talk. She somehow connects Danny’s antics with Ben just wanting to be friends with her. She says apparently, they’re just work colleagues. Ben says successful work colleagues can be friends too. In his interview, Ben talks about them almost having a war over what to call a dish, so could you imagine a romance between them?

Captain Mark is annoyed that the crew’s mess is a mess. Ha-ha! Hannah calls Bobby into her cabin and asks him to help her change. I guess because she’s drunk. She starts making out with him, saying in her interview that she’d been hesitant with Bobby, not knowing where she stood with Ben. She asks what happened after she left the dinner, which is not much, and tells Bobby that she’s going to make Danny’s life a living hell. She asks if Bobby wants to help. Sigh.

Bryan tells Danny to make a list of what he thinks is required for his job – according to Bryan. He actually does pretty well and Bryan says there’s no excuse for breaking those rules now. Double sigh.

Bobby tells Julia about Hannah’s mission. She says Danny does bring a lot of drama.

Hannah goes to the wheelhouse and tells the captain about Danny taking photos of the guests and showing them to other guests. As far as I know, he only showed one guy the Tilted Kilt girls. Hannah says it’s getting to be too much and she’s just giving Captain Mark a heads up. The captain says he’s never had anyone so ethically professionally challenged as Danny. I think this is what you get for hiring someone that young and inexperienced. Don’t they go to a class and get an employee handbook or something? Do they just hire these people off the street?

Captain Mark calls Danny in and talks to him about the pictures. The captain says it’s hard to discipline a new crew member when they didn’t know what they were doing is wrong. Like any good teacher captain, Captain Mark says he’s going to keep Danny’s phone while guests are on the boat.

The next charter is all women for a girls’ retreat. The primary, Linda, is the CEO of a wealth building system using luxury brands, which sounds like an MLM to me. Ben is glad to hear they want dinner on the beach so he can get out of the hot, sweaty galley.

Bryan asks Julia about cleaning up the crew mess. He gets bossy and she asks if he’s drunk. He gives the women orders and doesn’t want to help. Julia asks if he’s just going to stand there and watch, and he gets annoyed. Hannah says he’s being rude and he says he’s just doing his job. Hannah suggests either he walk away or they do. He leaves and Hannah tells Julia they should take five minutes to re-group. Bryan boomerangs back, following them to the galley. Hannah tells him he’s being aggressive and to knock it off.

Julia says she doesn’t want to be cleaning when she’s supposed to be doing the crew’s laundry. I’m assuming everyone contributed to this untidiness, why aren’t they all helping to clean up? In his interview, Bryan says he’s not sorry for being a dick. Really. He said that. Hannah thinks he should stay away from alcohol. I concur. The girls are having a snack in the crew mess and Hannah expresses her annoyance with Bryan.

Bryan asks to talk to Danny who is deathly ill. I don’t think Bryan believes it though. Ben thinks Hannah put voodoo on Danny. The crew gets ready for the charter. Hannah calls for a jeweler to bring a collection to the yacht for the guests to peruse.

Bryan tells the captain about Danny, who says he doesn’t want him infecting the rest of the crew. Bryan apologizes to Julia without apologizing. She says when he drinks, he gets aggressive and you should never stand over a woman the way he did. She says she doesn’t want to be confronted like that again. In her interview, she says even her parents never did that to her, and Bryan would get more out of the crew if he had more compassion. I see why everyone likes Tiffany – she stays very far away and out of the drama.

The guests arrive and the boat leaves port. A ferry is coming in and they have to hurry. Bryan doesn’t think Jen knows how to do as much as she says she does. Maybe it’s him.

The guests have Margaritas on deck. One of them says she’s never had a tequila hangover. God bless her. Years ago, I had one so bad, I never drank it again. The crew packs everything for the beach day. Bryan wants to talk to Jen, but she’s wrangling one of the jet skis that escaped. He says there’s a disconnect between Jen and her brain. Maybe, but Bryan has a disconnect between himself and humanity. In her interview, Jen says she’s seen good in Bryan, but thinks the job has gone to his head and he’s sexist.

The guests jet ski around. The crew packs up the picnic, but it’s noticed that the marshmallows aren’t exactly the right ones to make the requested s’mores. I agree, since they’re weird shapes and colors. Who bought those? The crew sets everything up on shore.

Ben makes a fabulous meal and the guests are impressed. I’m not sure what he’s doing with those s’mores though. The marshmallows are a total mess. Bobby says they’re like strawberry Peeps. Doesn’t matter. Either they still taste good enough or the ladies are drunk enough not to care. Everyone is happy.

Captain Mark checks on Danny. At last check, his temperature was 101. The captain says he’ll try to find something for him. He’s concerned the entire crew might get wiped out if it’s contagious.

The guests come back and go straight to bed. Hannah thinks she’s died and gone to heaven, the guests are so undemanding. Bobby tries to get advice from Jen about Julia. In her interview, Jen says he’s not Julia’s type even if she was single.

The Captain tells Ben that Danny’s temperature is now 103.2. He gives Danny something similar to liquid Tylenol and is trying to get the fever down. In his interview, Ben says this is nothing to fool around with. In her interview, detestable Hannah says karma’s a bitch.

Hannah and Bobby are having a thing. She says he’s nice about ten times in her interview. Danny’s temperature is 102.9 the next morning. Not much improvement. Bryan wants Jen to practice her knots. Even though there are several ways to do them, he wants it done his way. Bobby tells Julia about whatever is going on between him and Hannah. Like she cares. In her interview, she wonders if he’s trying to make her jealous or being one of those friends you can tell anything to.

The guests are loving everything and the crew is loving the guests. Tiffany thinks Bryan is being ridiculous with Jen about the knots.

Next temperature check is 102.7. Ben tells Danny to hang in there. He tells the captain that Danny’s temperature is still way high. He asks the captain what he wants to do. In his interview, the captain says it’s not like they’re on land and they can just drive somewhere. Ben puts on the air conditioning for Danny. Crap, his temperature is back to 103.2 again.

A few of the guests do the jet ski thing again. The captain confers with some of the other crew members and says they have to get Danny off the boat.

Next time, the guests are a group of hard partiers who want to party so hard they need a vacation from the vacation, Julia gets miffed at Ben and more knot instruction by Bryan.

The Haves and the Have Nots

Long story short, Jeffrey seduces Justin.

David continues to beat the snot out of Jim. The guard finally pulls him off. David tells the guard that Jim put a hit out on his wife. The guard says his wife is here. She’s in the interrogation room being questioned. David finds out it was Maggie who was killed – at Veronica’s house. That’s right, David, put two and two together.

I have some chocolate babka during the commercial break and laugh about that Seinfeld episode all over again.

Jeffrey has Justin handcuffed to the bed and puts his clothes back on. Justin tells Jeffrey to give him the key and says he’s not gay. Jeffrey asks him why he’s angry. He says Justin is the type who gets angry at the other guy for what he did, and he was like that once. Jeffrey puts the key out of Justin’s reach and says he has to go, but Justin will figure it out. He says he just doesn’t trust him. He says Justin is way to angry and he’ll take it out on him because he enjoyed it. He says when Justin can calm down and come out of the closet, and he’s ready to help him take down Veronica, call him. He tells Justin good luck and leaves.

David says he needs to talk to his wife. The guard says it will be just a little while. Veronica asks if she’s a suspect and looks appropriately shaken up. She says Maggie was her friend. I don’t know who is doing the interrogating, but Veronica tells her about the guy she thought she saw in the neighbor’s backyard and how Maggie pulled up and she told her to go inside.

Oscar calls David. He says Jim called off the hit. David tells him Maggie got killed. Oscar says Jim wouldn’t be so sloppy, hiring some guy from the hood, and Jim definitely called it off. Oscar says look at the bright side, his wife is still alive. David is like, yeah, right, the bright side.

Veronica asks how she could have known anyone was in the house and starts to cry over Maggie being her friend. The guard comes in and says something to the interrogator. She tells Veronica that David is there. David walks in and Veronica throws her arms around him, sobbing. She asks him to take her home. He asks the interrogator to schedule another time and she says they’ll call. Veronica acts all stressed out and runs out the door.

Benny gets back from visiting Candace. Hannah asks what she said. He says nothing. He might as well just tell her. He admits Candace won’t let either one of them take Quincy Jr. Hannah goes on about all of Quincy Jr.’s needs and wants to call Candace about giving him his morning medicine. Benny says he’ll call. Hannah asks him if Quincy Jr. was even there and Benny says no.

Hannah asks where he is and Benny says he doesn’t know. Hannah picks up the phone and calls Aliyah. She asks where her grandson is. Aliyah says she can’t discuss it and Hannah has to talk to her daughter. Hannah says Quincy Jr. isn’t with Candace and she’ll call the police. Aliyah keeps repeating she can’t say anything, but then does. She says Quincy Jr. was put in temporary foster care by Candace. Hannah asks where and Aliyah says she can’t tell her that and keeps saying she’s sorry. She finally says good-by.

Hannah tells Benny that Quincy Jr. is in foster care. She wants to go to Candace right now. Benny tells her she’s going to have a heart attack. Hannah says she doesn’t care, as long as she’s whoopin’ Candace’s ass when she goes, she’ll die happy. Benny keeps telling her to calm down, but Hannah can’t believe Candace would put Quincy Jr. in foster care because she hates Hannah so much. She cries out to God for help. I love Hannah’s heart, but man! she can be dramatic.

Jeffrey sees Landon at the hotel bar. He asks if Jeffrey has seen Candace. Landon is obviously looking around for someone, but he tells Jeffrey nothing is going on. He asks what Jeffrey is doing there and Jeffrey says he has a room there. Landon says he thought Jeffrey knew Candace and Jeffrey says she’s trouble. Landon says thanks for telling him now, and tells him about how Oscar swindled Candace and she threatened Landon’s life.

Jeffrey asks Landon if his father and Maggie are having an affair and Landon tells him yes. Jeffrey says good, because Maggie makes his father happy. Landon asks him for a tryst and Jeffrey tells him that he’s drunk and he’s had better. Landon says he can be better and Jeffrey says not as good as him, looking at Justin, who’s obviously freed himself and gotten dressed. Jeffrey pretends not to know Justin. Landon is about to leave, when he looks at his phone.

It’s the news about Maggie getting shot and killed. He gives Jeffrey the phone and asks if he’s reading it right. Jeffrey confirms the news. Landon is incredulous and says there’s no way. He runs out and Jeffrey goes after him.

The hotel manager complains about kids giving their hotel a bad name, while Wyatt lies there dead. The security guy says people are calling it the Dude Die Inn. The guy Jennifer sent to look for Wyatt calls her and tells her to get to the hotel now.

Meanwhile, at the Cryer mansion, Katherine wanders around like a zombie. Wait until she finds out Wyatt is dead. She goes to Wyatt’s room, and then meanders to their daughter’s (Amanda?) room and makes a phone call. Hannah’s phone rings. She ignores the call. Katherine calls again and Hannah picks up.

Katherine asks how Hannah is and where she is. Hannah says fine and she has a place. Katherine tells Hannah she’s sorry and tells her she should have given her the money. She says she was blindsided by Hannah leaving and never considered that she didn’t have anywhere to go. Hannah says she’s fine. Katherine says she can bring her the money and tells her she has a rental place Hannah can stay at. Hannah insists she’s fine. Katherine says she needs Hannah’s help.

Hannah says Katherine’s motives are always suspect. Katherine says she doesn’t have the strength for this, and Hannah says what makes her think she does? Katherine says she can’t lose her only child and asks Hannah to pray for her and her son. She says she’s made her bed and she should lie in it, but her children shouldn’t suffer. She talks about how well Benny turned out and Hannah says she still has Candace who makes up for it. Katherine says at least she got one right. She says she has no idea where Wyatt is and Hannah says all she can do is wait. Katherine says she’s afraid. She’s scared that every time the phone rings, it’s going to be bad news and Hannah says she knows the feeling.

Katherine asks if she gets the call, will Hannah be there? Hannah says who’ll be there for her, and Katherine says she will. Katherine says she has no one else and Hannah says she doesn’t think she’ll get that call, but she’ll be there. She adds until that time, they have nothing to say to each other. Katherine says she understands and she’s sorry. They say good-by. Great scene.

I get up as soon as the commercials start and fork some KFC whole kernel corn in front of the refrigerator and it’s the shortest commercial break ever. By the time I get one forkful to my mouth, it’s over.

Veronica tells David his plan didn’t work and accuses him of ordering the hit. David says Jim set it up and he’d been trying to protect her by keeping her in jail. She says even if it was true about Jim, he must have wanted it to happen. David turns the tables, accusing Veronica of setting Maggie up. He says Jim wouldn’t have been so stupid to hire an amateur. He gets aggressive with Veronica and she tells him to look in the rear view mirror; security is following them. He tells her that her wish is in the glove box. Divorce papers. She tears them up. She says if she finds out he’s gone behind her back, or she’s outed in any way, she’ll make his life a living hell. He says hell is better than what he’s going through now.

David tells Veronica to get out of the car. She refuses. He says he’ll drag her ass out. She says there’s the husband she wants and she’d be glad to see it. He gets out and comes around to her side. She says he didn’t act like that when Maggie was alive and she needed him. She gets in the security car as David drives away.

Jennifer shows up at Wyatt’s hotel room. Her guy confirms that Wyatt is dead.

Next time, Candace’s nosy neighbor tells Hannah to stay away from Candace, Landon doesn’t trust Jeffrey, David apologizes to Jim, and Katherine finds out about Wyatt.

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