November 14, 2016 – Sonny Unloads His Gun, Jax Spreads a Rumor & Kelly is the OC Reunion’s Target

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Oh no. The president is expected to speak in 15 minutes. Should I even bother? You know this will probably be a long one.

At the funeral, Sonny tells everyone that his son is gone and most of them blame him, but they can’t blame him more than he blames himself. Sonny says Morgan’s life wasn’t easy, and Morgan deserves to be at peace, but that can’t happen because of what he did. He knows how to make it happen though. He takes out his gun.

Nina is talking on the phone with Nathan. She says she has everything under control.

Valentin approaches Laura on her way into Windemere. He says he doesn’t have any keys and can’t find the caretaker.

Scotty joins Ava for a secret meeting. He’s annoyed that she picked a place that doesn’t serve alcohol. She says she’d expected him to carry a flask. He asks why she’s wearing black, and she says she’s thinking of going to Morgan’s funeral. Well, she’d best hurry up, since it’s pretty much over. Scotty says he knows she switched Morgan’s medication, but Sonny and Carly don’t. She says it’s only a matter of time before they do.

Sonny puts the gun down. He says violence smothered his son’s life. Morgan had a future in front of him, but he won’t have the chance to do what he wanted because of Sonny. Sonny wants to make it clear that no one except him is responsible and looks pointedly at Carly. Jordan interrupts, asking if he’s confessing. He says he has to get this out first. Jason approaches him and says this is a bad idea.

Sonny goes to Carly. He talks about her asking him to change and to stop the cycle of violence. He apologizes for breaking his promise and says now their beautiful boy lost his life. He tells Michael that what he said was right – Morgan always fogave. He tells Michael not to beat himself up. He’s the one who should have protected Morgan. He says he’d do anything to trade places with Morgan., so he could be sitting next to his mom in church. He says the only thing he can do is to take responsibility for his actions. He’ll be sorry the rest of his life, and do everything to atone for it.

He takes the bullets out of the gun. He holds out his hands and tells Dante to do what needs to be done.

Laura tells Valentin she’ll be gone before the day is out. He says he extended an olive branch, and she says he knows what he can do with it. Ha-ha! Feisty Laura. He tells her if she changes her mind she’s welcome to stay.

Nina says she loves her brother but he’s a worrier. We see she’s talking to Charlotte, who’s sitting on the floor in Nina’s office. Nina tells Charlot while Nathan is making plans, they’ll play. Charlotte wants to play paper dolls, and Nina says she can definitely make that happen.

Ava tells Scotty about what Lucy said. She’s concerned that if she makes a wrong move, Lucy will go running to Sonny. She says if Lucy brings the pills to Sonny and Carly, they’ll know she switched them. Scotty says he’d lay low. Ava says there’s no statute of limitations with Sonny, and if he finds out, she’s dead. She tells Scotty he knows what needs to be done. He says she needs a dye job and the first freighter to Cuba. She tells him that they have to get the pills.

Jordan says she’s not going to arrest Sonny here, but wants him to come in for questioning. Sonny, Jordan and Dante leave. Michael asks Carly if she’s okay. She says she’s fine and Sonny made his choice. What’s done is done.

Valentin says he can’t wait for Charlotte to move in with him. To get any new audience members and viewers with short term memory loss up to speed, Laura responds, “the house you stole from my son whom you killed.” Doc is at the door, and Valentin says welcome to my home. Doc wants to know how it’s his home. He says he’ll let Laura explain. It belongs to the Cassadines, but she’ll always have a place there.

Carly talks to Nell about the reception and tells her to cancel the room. She says she wanted justice for Morgan, but she’s not sure this is what she had in mind. Speaking of the funeral, was no one going to the cemetery? Or were they just going to keep the casket in the house? There was never any mention of burying it and several people left early.

Dante tells Sonny that he needs an attorney, but Sonny just wants it over with. Sonny goes into the interrogation room, and Jordan takes Dante aside.

Jason hands a cop some money and goes into the interrogation room by the other door. He tells Sonny that he’s making a mistake.

Well, ABC is going to cover the president. I may as well go back to looking at pics of that underwater restaurant in the Maldives that I will never be able to afford to go to.

Doc asks Laura how Valentin made a claim to the estate. Laura says it’s a long, sad, misogynistic story. She asks if he wants to help her pack. He says, let’s just get out of here. He tells her they can brainstorm on what she’s going to do next. She says she’s moving in with Dante and Lulu. Doc tells her that she’s welcome to stay with him.

Nina and Charlotte are getting along great. Charlotte makes a purple paper doll and Nina says purple is her favorite color. Valentin shows up with purple tulips. What a coincidence. He says he gets to sit with not just one, but two beautiful ladies.

Ava says Scotty knows Lucy’s sweet spots, and can distract her and get the pills. He asks what’s in it for him.

Kiki tells Dillon that she needs time to herself to sit with her feels and memories, and say good by to Morgan in her own way. She tells him she’ll see him later. She leaves. Nell does damage control on the phone. Bobbie asks Michael what he thinks of Nell. He thinks she’s great and she’s been supportive of Carly. Bobbie is like, hmmph!

Carly tells Jax she can’t believe Sonny confessed. Jax says Sonny doesn’t like violence, but has no problem using it, and doesn’t consider collateral damage. He says Sonny is smart, but he doesn’t think Sonny got it until today. Carly says what about Morgan’s brothers and sisters, and what about Avery? Ava will get full custody. Jax says it will hurt some people, but Sonny did the right thing. Today he took the first step in protecting his family

Jordan gives Dante the option to sit this out. Jason tells Sonny that Diane is on the way. Sonny says he’s making a full confession and will gladly go to prison. Jason says under no circumstances is he to confess to anything.

Yep, here it comes. The State of the Union. Sigh….

At least it’s only Monday.

Vanderpump Rules

The gang gathers in Lisa’s office. It’s World Dog Day and Lisa brings along Nappy, a little one-eyed terrier. Jax asks if there’s going to be alcohol. Lisa discovers that Kristen has gotten an invite. Brittany is ready to punch Jax for spreading rumors about her and Kristen. She tells Scheana that she doesn’t even want to be around him right now. Scheana thought that maybe since he’d been with Brittany, he was being more respectful, but she takes that back now. Scheana invites Brittany to stay at her apartment. Where’s Shay these days anyway?

Tom and Schwartz go for some much needed relaxing time at the spa. Yes, I’m being sarcastic. Do these people even work?

Katie visits Stassi. Stassi says it’s her first apartment where she isn’t living with someone or her father is paying for it. They talk about World Dog Day, which is going to be at the local dog park. Stassi says she tried working for Lisa once and it lasted four hours. We flash back, and she says it’s number four on the list of things she’s scared of. Katie is hoping that it doesn’t turn into the Hunger Games of bridesmaids when she has to choose.

Tom and Schwartz talk about the wedding plans. As Schwartz is talking about cutting corners. He doesn’t want a cake. I hope Katie plans a cake anyway. Seriously. WTF? Tom asks if he’s sure he wants to do this and thinks maybe Schwartz and Katie should get some pre-wedding therapy.

James takes Scheana aside at SUR. He says obviously the night didn’t go well, referring to the OK! Magazine party. He claims Scheana came at him, but she says he approached them and started insulting them about not working on their summer bodies. He apologizes and she suggests he apologize to Katie as well. Although she accepts his apology, in her interview, Scheana says she doesn’t buy it, and sure enough, in his interview, James says it’s bullsh*t.

Lala is having lunch with her mom, Lisa. Not that Lisa. She says she wishes she didn’t have to lean on her mom so much, and Lisa tells her that’s what moms are for. Lala says she thinks she’s turning into a vicious person and Lisa says that’s not her. Yes. It is. Lala says she doesn’t feel good about it after she’s mean, and her mom says it probably brings her back to being bullied herself. Lala says she knows there’s a family history of drinking problems (and problems with naming their children ridiculous things like Lala). She says she keeps it to a two drink minimum. Really? They must be pretty strong drinks. Or twenty ounce drinks. Lala rags on her co-workers, and Lisa says she has a tender heart, but a tough exterior, which makes perfect sense. Not.

Carter and Kristen are having dinner at their apartment. Kristen wants to invite some people over after the World Dog thing. Kristen is annoyed about the rumor that Jax is spreading. She says she and Brittany had a few wasted kisses, but she really doesn’t remember anything. 100% though, she didn’t do that.

The rumor about Kristen and Brittany is flying around everywhere. Even the cooks at SUR are discussing it. It’s like that part in Bye, Bye Birdie when everyone gets on the phone to talk about Hugo and Kim going steady. Scheana tells Lisa that it’s not right that Brittany is only there a couple of weeks and now everyone is giving her the side-eye. Lisa agrees that it’s really not fair. Brittany approaches Jax. She’s angry that he started this, and he tells her to get over it. She says it’s upsetting and he says he didn’t mean to hurt her feelings. In the interview, she says she knows he likes to make up things, but to do it to her is the worst. Jax says she’s making it more than it is, and she tells him she’s done, but I’m not sure with what.

Lisa asks Brittany if she’s okay. She says she knows what happened, and Brittany says she feels like he’s tarnishing her name. She tells Lisa what he said isn’t what happened. In her interview, Lisa says she doesn’t regret hiring Brittany, but she sometimes regrets not firing Jax. Brittany starts to cry, and Lisa tells her to stay strong. Chin up and all that.

In the morning, Scheana asks Brittany if she’s going to kick Jax’s ass. Hey, there’s Shay! Brittany goes home and loves on the dog. Jax is still in bed and tells her he’s sleeping. He says she’s the one who’s keeping the story going, and she says it’s about her. She tells him that he exaggerated hugely, and she doesn’t understand why he’d talk about her this way. He gets loud and says everyone is wrong. She asks why he said it, and he says because it happened. She says it didn’t happen, and if he’s sorry, he needs to act like it. Ditch that guy already, Brittany. You have a job. Two jobs. You don’t need him as a third.

Katie explains how she’s going to do a bridesmaids reveal to Schwartz. She tells him about how much the photographer costs, and he thinks maybe she should keep him in the dark. In her interview, she says she usually likes that he’s a cheapskate, but not this time. Their venue is called the 20 Miles House. She says it’s going to be everything and more. I tend to agree. It’s a huge old house out in the middle of a beautiful nowhere. The whole thing will be about 18K and they require a 5K deposit. August 17 is the date – it’s a Wednesday and cheaper. When that deed is done, Schwartz tells her that they should probably get a prenup. He says it’s like health insurance, you hope you won’t need it, but it’s a precautionary measure. Katie says unless he’s sitting on a trust fund she doesn’t know about, all he has are massive amounts of sweat pants and action figures. She agrees and he gets turned on by her sensibility.

James meditates on the balcony of his apartment. There’s a knock at the door and he skates over. It’s Lala. He shows her around his new place. He has a roommate, who’s renting him some space in his penthouse. He’s released both Pump Sessions and the single he did with Lala, and also released a video. He says if he stays focused, his dreams can take off. Lala tells him to stay on track and not let people throw him off.

World Dog Day is here! Katie has donation buckets and raffle tickets for the group to take around. Brittany says it’s going to be hard to get through the day with Jax. She feels like whenever she talks to someone, they’re thinking about what he told everyone. Lisa arrives and marvels at all the fabulous dogs. One of the managers tells Lisa about James being stupid at PUMP, and how some guy put him in a headlock. James is telling Tom his version of what happened, and says people attack him because they’re jealous. Okay. In her interview, Lisa says if James is at fault, she’s going to let him go. In his interview, James says he’s young and good-looking and people are jealous of him. I believe it if you believe it. He’s half right anyway. I’m not into crossed eyes and a scrawny frame.

James tries to apologize to Katie. She says he acts like an a-hole, apologizes, and then laughs about the person falling for it. He says they have their differences, but he’s trying to say sorry. She says she’s never done anything to him, and he’s a horrible person, adding that he should just mind his own business from now on and she’ll mind hers. He is truly a nasty piece of work. And Katie is far from fat.

The donations pour in. The dogs do an obstacle course. Kyle Richards comes by. Kristen brings Carter. Stassi wonders if there’s alcohol. Lisa says she loves dogs and everyone knows how she feels about bitches, referring to Stassi and Kristen. Lisa confronts James about the incident at PUMP, and James tries to defend himself, acting like everyone is just out to get him and he’s not really an idiot. Doggy yoga starts at two.

Stassi goes over to talk to Lisa, saying she’s going to disarm her with her pups. She has two tiny dogs that are very cute, and one is wearing a tiny hat. Kristen is with her, and Lisa alludes to the rumor, enjoying that she’s making Kristen uncomfortable.

Jax talks to Schwartz about the wedding. Schwartz says he’s excited, and Jax thinks he’s just saying that. Jax talks about the week long argument he’s been having with Britney. She thinks it’s more than just a silly rumor and because he’s betrayed her trust so much, it’s turned into something else.

Lisa makes a speech. She talks about the Yulan Dog Festival, and tells everyone to say no to the dog meat trade and celebrate their furry friends. She feels the event has been a success. Everyone who was invited has shown up and then some.

Kristen says Brittany is the best thing that’s ever happened to Jax, and he’s ruining it. She tells Jax that he has an awesome girlfriend and he’s messing it up. He acts like he doesn’t know what she’s talking about. She says a drunk kiss isn’t having sex. He says it’s his relationship and his problem. Kristen says he’s pulling a Jax, and to just stop screwing people over that care about him. In his interview, Jax says Kristen wins, but they’ll always know what really happened. Kristen tells him not to hurt Brittany.

Next time, Katie picks her bridesmaids, Schwarz has a dinner and embarrasses Tom, and James gets fired…maybe.

The Real Housewives of the OC – The Reunion Part Two

We’re so bored with this stuff, they show us some behind-the-scenes scenes. Andy shows clips of the moments when the OC ladies got down and dirty in more ways than one. We flash back to some of the funny stuff, like milking the cows and explaining wet dreams to their children. A viewer asks if Vicki got her nipples fixed yet, but she isn’t saying.

Andy talks about new beginnings for Shannon. We flash back to the vow renewal and the move. This is counteracted by scenes from the party where David’s mother talked trash about Shannon. A viewer asks if the vow renewal changed things for her. Shannon says David’s emotion was heart warming. Shannon disagrees with any comparison to Vicki and Don. Vicki says Don thought their vow renewal was good for TV, while she thought differently. Shannon starts getting loud, and Vicki says in retrospect, she wouldn’t have put it on the show.

Andy asks if Shannon and David made a sex tape on their second honeymoon, and I tell him thanks a lot for that visual. He then goes around the room with the question. He asks Shannon if she thinks what her MIL did at the party was premeditated. She says yes, and hasn’t spoken to her since. Andy pretends that Grandma Donna is coming out, but everyone is used to his fake-outs now.

A viewer says that it was classic Tamra sh*t stirring for her to tell Shannon what Donna was saying. Tamra says she didn’t know Shannon was going to react that way. Heather speaks for her, saying Tamra wouldn’t have done it if she’d known how Shannon was going to react. Andy questions Vicki about how she said she felt sorry for David, and Vicki says you never forget about an affair, and always question what you lacked because it happened. Tamra says she would never be able to get over it. Well, look out, because Eddie is pretty good-looking and you can be a real shrew.

Shannon says she’s not the reason David had an affair, he is. She says they weren’t happy at the time, but there were other things going on in his life. Andy asks about the other woman and Shannon says she renewed her football tickets in front of them (they sit ten rows apart), but other than the one altercation in the beginning, there’s been no contact. Andy asks how things re going now, and Shannon says great; their marriage is solid.

Andy brings up how often Shannon says “are you kidding me?” Each woman’s over-used phrase or word is presented: for Heather, it’s by the way; Kelly, of course; Tamra, God/Jesus; Vicki, whoop it up; and Meghan, sperm. We see clips of them all saying these things a thousand times.

We move on to Heather calling Terry out on being an absentee father. We see clips of their vacation, Terry working too much, Heather discussing it with him, and ending with Terry saying he’s going to be a better dad. A viewer asks how much the new house cost. Heather says numbers aren’t relevant. When she won’t tell them, Andy asks Kelly, who says twenty million plus. A viewer asks if Heather’s life is so perfect that she really doesn’t have problems. She says right now it’s good, but it’s ridiculous to think there are never any problems.

Briana joins us straight from the night shift at the hospital. She and Vicki talk about how great their relationship is now that Brooks is gone. Briana says it’s good to be back in the OC. We flash back to Vicki getting her the hell out of Oklahoma, followed by clips of Vicki leading the single life for two minutes, and then meeting Steve. They’ve been dating for seven months now. She says her love tank is over-filled, and Briana thinks he’s amazing. He’s never seen the show, and Vicki says one of the qualities she wanted in a man was that he didn’t know her from TV. For whatever reason, when Steve sent Vicki flowers, Heather thought Vikci had sent the flowers to herself, writing about it in her blog. Vicki tells Heather that she took some of the pleasure out of it and Heather rolls her eyes, because when she does something nasty, it’s okay. Andy asks Tamra what she thinks of him, like this matters. A viewer asks why Vicki needs a man to be happy. She claims she doesn’t and is cool being alone, but Briana is like, no, and the rest of us agree.

We move on to Briana’s medical issues. She says while she was getting tests, she found out she had Lupus. A viewer asks if Vicki bribed Briana with the house. Briana jokes that it was a good bribe, but no. She says that just because her mother helps her, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t work hard, and people don’t realize that. Shannon gets called on the carpet for saying that Vicki bribed her, and she apologizes, because it’s sincere when it comes from her.

Since we can’t get away from it, they talk about Brooks some more. Apparently, there’s been some problems regarding integrity and the cancer charity Vicki was involved with, and the website has been taken down. Everyone puts in their two cents, and it actually doesn’t sound like Vicki did anything wrong, and there was some kind of opt-in if you wanted emails about insurance. They were also giving out some kind of bracelets and I laugh when Heather demands to know if people can get a bracelet without putting in their information. No, Heather, they just guess at what address they should send the bracelet. When Vicki points this out, more nicely than I just did, Heather isn’t sure how to react because she’s so obviously acting like a moron.

Before an argument can start, Andy thanks Briana for coming. Tamra follows her out. Tamra tries to talk to Briana about Kelly, saying Vicki traded Brooks for Kelly. Briana says Vicki needs someone in her corner. For the love of Jesus that you claim to follow, Tamra, leave this sick woman who just got off a double-shift alone. On stage, Kelly and Vicki sweat not to abandon one another.

We see some of Kelly’s malapropisms. We move on to her shock and offense tour, and see clips of her being incredibly nasty. We see the mess in Ireland with Tamra, and I wonder what I’d do if someone insulted how I mother my dogs. Probably not what Tamra did. Heather says that Kelly’s M.O. is behave badly, apologize, and say I’m not really like that. Kelly says there’s no shame in her game. Really. She says that. She needs to read more. She says at the time, she felt sorry, but not anymore. A viewer asks if Kelly has a drinking problem because all of the altercations involve alcohol. Kelly claims she doesn’t have a drinking problem. She says she went to court mandated AA classes after she hit her ex-husband to stop him from fighting. I literally LOL.

Kelly brings up Heather saying she’s not filming unless they get rid of Kelly. We flash back to the sushi dinner. Heather says she was horrified, but Kelly tells her that she’s not the boss. Kelly thinks they should call her “bossy pants” instead of “fancy pants.” Heather says the last time she’d seen her BIL alive was at that restaurant, so she had bad memories of it to begin with. She doesn’t elaborate on this, so I wonder, did they have an argument? Did he choke on a fish bone? What happened?  She says the place literally has paper thin walls, and it was her visceral reaction. We see a clip of her saying that she doesn’t care if they fire her, she’s taking off her mic and she’s done. Kelly points out the others who throw around the f-bomb. She does have a point. It’s funny though, how we all react badly to that one word.

Andy asks Kelly if she stands behind her behavior. She says they were in a private room and doesn’t seem to grasp how thin the walls were. Andy asks why she apologized at the time. She says how she was treated later changed her viewpoint about them. Kelly is asked if her daughter sees the show, but she says no. Andy asks Meghan what she thinks. She’s been pretty quiet for the most part, probably contemplating childbirth. She says that Kelly gets defensive, and when she gets defensive she plays dirty. Kelly says she didn’t know there were rules, which makes me laugh, but the rules are called common courtesy and she does get nasty when she drinks. Heather talks over Meghan and Kelly, telling Kelly about her pattern again. Kelly tells Heather that her pattern is interrupting her and interloping.

The Ireland insult to Tamra is brought up. Heather says that when she criticized Kelly’s parenting on the bus, Kelly got upset. Kelly says Heather didn’t apologize. Heather says she is now. Heather says the difference between them is she learns from her mistakes, and it won’t happen again. Kelly says she apologizes for saying what she did about Tamra’s daughter. A viewer brings up how many times Tamra has said similar things to other cast members and we see flashbacks. Tamra says none of those things were okay for her to have said, and she was hurt by Kelly’s remark. They go over Tamra pushing Kelly in the store since we didn’t see it. Everyone talks at once and Andy tells them to stop it.

A viewer says Kelly has an anger issue, but doesn’t Tamra have one too? Tamra says she’s a bad drunk. Kelly says apologies are flying. Vicki thinks everyone should just move on. Kelly says if she hadn’t had anger management lready, she would have thumped Tamra. I might pay to see that. She says she didn’t and restrained herself.

Andy asks if Vicki is the Buddha of the OC. Shannon says not in her part of town. Andy asks about Kelly being mean and far shaming on social media. Shannon brings up a picture Kelly posted along with the words “keep eating.”

Next time – The Reunion, Part Three – Tamra and Vicki tangle, Tamra calls Vicki and “old woman” (don’t worry, Tamra, you’ll get there), Vicki claims to have proof that David beat Shannon, Shannon walks off stage, and Heather tells Vicki that she should beg Shannon for forgiveness which doesn’t go over too well.

💋 A note about The Real Housewives of Atlanta. Mama Joyce and I have the same ombre sweater. In different colors, but it’s the same. I don’t know how to feel about this.

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