What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
Griff tells Julian that he’s doing well. While he checks on the X-rays, Julian calls Alexis and leaves a message. He hears someone come into the room, and assuming it’s Griff, asks how things look. It’s Winston, who tells him it’s not looking very good.
Sonny thinks about his last interaction with Nell. Jason and Sam stop by. He tells them that he’s thinking about the things he has to deal with. Well, it’s not a lie.
Nell confers with Olivia, who tells her to take the rest of the day off. Nell nearly runs into Michael on her way out.
Lulu tells Robin that she’s glad Robin could stay for Maxie’s wedding part two. She gets a text, and says there’s just a minor hiccup.
Nathan asks Nina where Maxie is. Nina says they left her alone for two seconds and she disappeared. Nathan says everyone is showing up any minute, and Nina tells him the surprise is on them.
Maxie is at a ticket window. I assume at the airport, although the airport looks amazingly like GH.
Curtis sees Jordan at the MetroCourt and asks her what’s going on. She tells him about the wedding. He tells her he can help them with the case, but has to do it on his terms, and she has to do him a solid. She says her new shoes hurt, so hurry up with the explanation. He tells her that they’re moving in on the person who caused Morgan’s death, and it’s not Sonny.
Sonny tells Jason and Sam that a luxury cage is still a cage. He’s been thinking about how whoever caused Morgan’s death is still out there. Sam says no one inspected the damage at the pawn shop, and it’s owned by a dummy corporation. Sonny tells them that the trial starts soon, so they have to move fast.
Nell tells Michael about the wedding, and he says he’s there with a tux for Dante. He asks her to join him for some hot chocolate.
Nina tells the others that she did everything as planned, and acted like it was a normal day. Nathan says all of his calls to Maxie have gone to voicemail. Nina adds that everything was fine, but Lulu says apparently not. They decide to check Maxie’s computer.
Maxie asks for a flight to Portland. The desk clerk says over 30 people are on stand-by, and she’s better off going tomorrow. She explains how great Nathan is, how he’s a hot cop who speaks French, and they’re supposed to be on their honeymoon, but she needs to go someplace where her feelings won’t be judged. Hey, she sees Spinelli, but it’s not Spinelli. I’m hoping it’s because the actor got a better gig elsewhere. I’ll miss him.
Nathan finds out that Maxie ordered a car to take he to the airport.
NuSpinelli says she’s not supposed to be there. She says she was at work, but no one showed the slightest bit of sensitivity after the wedding postponement. She wants to see Georgie, but Spinelli tells her that’s not possible right now. When she asks why he’s there, he says he’s doing some work for Sam. He tells her that Ellie is taking Georgie to DisneyWorld in his absence. Maxie asks if that isn’t a milestone, and says she wanted to be the first to take her. She makes for the window again, but Spinelli asks why she’s really fleeing (his word). Maxie says that she doesn’t want to make a sad situation all about her, and is giving Nathan space. Spinelli says he thinks the last thing Nathan would want is space. He’s rented a car, and asks her to let him drive her back. He says Nathan might surprise her.
Sam says she hasn’t had a chance to talk to Julian about the picture, but he seemed genuinely worried. Sonny says he’s partly responsible for Morgan’s death. Sam leaves the room, and Sonny asks Jason how she’s doing. Jason says good, but he’s trying not to worry her. Sonny says Jason took a risk and he appreciates that. He says when it’s over, they need to have a conversation about his role in the business.
Winston tells Julian that Jason and Curtis found the office, and the boss is upset about the expense and the inconvenience. He says they’ve had enough of Jason and to get rid of him – tonight.
Curtis explains about the hidden office to Jordan, and how they’d gotten the information from Buzz. He tells her that a woman calls all the shots. Jordan asks where Buzz is, and Curtis tells her that he’s stashed somewhere safe, but the bottom line is that Sonny is innocent. Jordan says to bring Buzz in and she’ll take his statement.
Winston tells Julian to get rid of Jason. Julian says he’s not killing his daughter’s husband. Winston says up until now, he’s done everything they requested. Julian says there were no requests, he was forced, and he’s done. Griff interrupts with the X-ray results.
Sonny tells Jason there’s no one he trusts more than him. He asks if Jason doesn’t feel like this is where he belongs. Jason says he belongs with his wife and kids. Sonny asks him to just think about it. Sam comes back in and says they’d better get going. Outside, she tells Jason she heard Sonny make him another offer. She knows things change and is with him no matter what. She looks weird, and he asks what’s wrong, but she says it’s nothing.
Michael and Nell go to Perks for hot chocolate. He reminds her of how he followed her there and convinced her to stay. She tells him that staying there has lined up with some of her long-term goals.
Nathan and Dante ask the airline clerk about Maxie, but he’s hesitant to tell them anything. Nathan says it’s not official police business, but when he starts telling the story, the clerk recognizes it, and asks if he speaks French. The clerk tells him that Maxie didn’t buy a ticket, but he heard her talking about going to DisneyWorld.
Spinelli brings Maxi back to the office. She says that if she sees another wedding accessory, she’s going to freak out. Lulu and Robin hold up bouquets, and tell her welcome to her wedding day. Nina tells her that she’s marrying Nathan tonight. She asks if Spinelli knew. He says he did, and Mac is picking up Georgie and Ellie. Maxie says she doesn’t want to force Nathan down the aisle, and Lulu tells her that it was his idea. Nina says Nathan would move mountains, heaven, and earth to be with her.
Dante looks to see if any other airlines are leaving for Atlanta, because that’s where DisneyWord is. Was that a mistake, a joke, what? Unless she was making a connecting flight, she wouldn’t be going there to see Georgie either. Spinelli calls and tells them the bride has been recovered. Sounds like something out of Kill Bill.
Jordan tells Curtis that she doesn’t like the way he went about it, but appreciates his dedication, and maybe she can trust him again. She tells him to bring Buzz in, and he may be worthy of a badge again. He says her trust means a lot, but so does Buzz’s, and wonders if there’s another way.
Julian tells Griff that Winston is his driver. Winston says he thought Julian might need assistance, and Griff tells him he’s free to go. When Griff leaves, Julian tells Winston that he took an unnecessary risk, and Winston says Julian did the same with Jason. Julian says he’s tired of being prisoner of his own life. He had a good life, and lost it because of what they’ve made him do. He tells Winston that it’s not going to happen, so go ahead and kill him. He’s not letting them tear apart his family’s lives the way they’ve torn apart his. He says Winston has made it clear, now he’ll do the same. He’s done, the hell with them, and he’s telling his family everything.
Lulu makes sure all the details are in place. It’s time for Maxie to get ready.
Olivia gives Dante his tux and tells them to get ready. Nathan thanks Dante for having his back and making him feel like a part of the family. He’s honored to have him as best man. They bro hug.
Griff stops by Sonny’s place on the way to the wedding. He asks how Sonny been since he’s homebound, and if he’s found any peace. Sonny says he’s not going to excuse his lifestyle, but it’s good to know it wasn’t his fault. Griff says he’s sure it brought relief to him and Carly. Sonny says it’s helped the healing process, but Griff senses there’s something more. He says something made him go there today, and he can listen. Sonny says he slept with someone other than his wife.
Michael wants to ice skate, but Nell hesitates. She says she actually skates quite well, and could have made it into the Olympics. Coaches cost money though, and her father told her to forget about it, so she did and hasn’t skated since. Michael says he’s sorry, and she says dreams are just dreams, and not everyone can afford to follow them, which she learned at a young age. She says she’ll pass on skating, since it doesn’t have good memories. Michael says if we wallow in pain, it can affect the rest of our lives, and that we should be defined by what we do today. She should let go of the baggage that’s holding her back.
Sonny tells Griff that he was hurting and drinking after Carly left, and heard she kissed her ex. Griff asks who it is. Sonny says someone close to the family who’s getting close with Michael, so this would hurt him too. Griff says he can’t judge him for his actions, but a bunch of Hail Marys probably won’t help him. Sonny wants to know if he should tell the truth.
Winston tells Julian that letting his family know would just put them in the boss’s sights. Julian says he thought he was keeping them safe, but everything he’s been made to do has put them in harm’s way. He thinks maybe the boss should worry about him for a change. Maybe it’s time to turn on the lights. He says when that happens, he’ll be a powerful enemy. He’s done playing. Julian walks out.
Winston calls one of the temp waiters at the wedding. We saw him earlier. Olivia had questioned what he was doing there and Nell said he was a temp she’d hired because they didn’t have enough staff for the restaurant and Maxie’s wedding. I don’t think Nell has anything to do with it though – she has her own revenge storyline. Winston tells the waiter that the boss is right; Julian isn’t being cooperative, and they need to go on with the plan. The waiter gets into elevator with Olivia.
At first, I was thinking the boss is going to wreak havoc at the wedding by blowing it up or something, but that really wouldn’t get them very far. Julian isn’t going to be there and he’d totally expose them if that happened. So my next thought is, they’re going to kidnap someone? Sam?
Sam tells Jason that she just needs to take it easy. He asks if she wants to go home. She doesn’t want to miss the wedding, but says that sounds good. The elevator opens and Julian is standing there.
Maxie thanks the girls, saying she treasures all of them. They group hug.
Nell tells Michael that it’s easy to let things go when you grow up in the lap of luxury. He says that’s not fair or accurate. He tells Nell that you have to keep living and trying, and you’ll make it through. She asks how he stays so positive, and he says he doesn’t like the alternative. He says every day he makes one happy memory, so he looks forward and not back. He suggests they rent some skates.
Griff tells Sonny that there are two schools of thought: the truth will set you free, or the damage is already done. Sonny says so either he suffers in silence or bites the bullet, but he doesn’t know which to choose. Griff has to leave, and Sonny walks him to the door, thanking him for stopping by. Griff tells him to think and pray about it, and he’ll know when he knows. Griff, the great philosopher. The next Kahlil Gabran.
Jordan tells Curtis that anything less than Buzz’s statement isn’t good for her. Curtis asks if she’d be comfortable taking it outside of the station. She agrees, and he says he’ll set it up. She asks if he’s okay with this, and he says he trusts her.
Julian says he has to tell Sam something. She says she’s not up for his lies and evasions, but he says the both of them need to hear this.
Winston tells the boss that they’ll send Julian a message that he won’t be able to ignore.
Olivia is on the phone and says, you’re scaring me.
Tomorrow, maybe the surprise wedding happens, Griff asks Anna what happened, Winston says the plans are in motion, and Olivia plans to meet someone at GH.
Giggy! Harrison! And the rest! ♫ Here on Vanderpump Isle! ♫
In her interview, Lisa says that people say that she’s obsessed with dogs, and they’re right. I knew there was a reason I liked her. Katie stops by with new SUR dress choices and Lisa picks one out. She asks Schwartz and Katie how the birthday trips went. Schwartz loved the fast cars, RV and beer, and Katie says sometimes absence makes the heart grow fonder. She invites Lisa to her shower, and Lisa says she’ll be by for a glass of champagne.
Scheana tells Brittany that she heard Jax was a d*ck during the trip. How this would be different from any other time, I’m not sure. In her interview, Brittany says Jax needs to shape up. Right now, her mother likes him, and she wants to keep it that way.
Lala strolls into work, and Tom asks what happened that she never showed up for Ariana’s birthday. She says she’s feeling that she doesn’t want to surround herself with people who aren’t positive and bring out the best in her. When she heard Jax was on the guest list, she got a knot in her stomach. After pointing out that she had plenty of time to say something about it, Tom tells her that he and Ariana have taken a lot of grief in sticking up for her, and she couldn’t even be bothered to answer their texts. She says she’ll be glad to pay them back for the ticket, but he says that’s not the point. Scheana joins them, and basically says the same thing. Lala says she’s sorry, and she has a gift for them if they want it. In his interview, Tom says he’s probably done with Lala forever.
Kristen hosts a comedy show at the Improv. We flash back to Ariana being offended that Kristen was horning in on her territory, and saying that she takes comedy seriously. In her interview, Kristen says that Ariana refuses to come because she might laugh. Kristen’s friend, Gabi, does a bit about an app that turns d*ck pics into classic art to “camouflage” them. In his interview, Jax thinks it’s a low blow that they used one of his pics, but I don’t know if he gets that he made a joke. In his interview, Schwartz says the pic had actually gone viral, and Tom recognized Jax’s shoes. Jax thinks he’d be a good model for sex toys. I will point out again that he’s nearly 40 years old.
Brittany brings the man behind the pic to Stassi’s attention. She’s impressed that Brittany can call out Jax’s penis in a mash-up. Brittany thought it would be nice if they’d given her a heads up and she definitely doesn’t realize she made a joke. Neither does anyone else, and I’m shocked. I’m usually not the one with a 14-year-old boy’s mentality. In her interview, Kristen says you’d be surprised how difficult they are to find, and if you google d*ck pic, all you get are old men politicians in navy blue suits. I’ll take her word for it.
Lisa isn’t thrilled with the paint colors that Katie has picked out for her dining room, saying they look more like something for a nursery. Katie tells Lisa about the comedy show, and explains the app joke. Lisa tells her that it’s like she’s speaking a different language. Katie says it’s not something she’s ever received, and Lisa says her neither, and she feels left out. Katie tells Lisa about Jax’s contribution.
Brittany is annoyed that Jax didn’t cop to the pic at first. He talks to Kristen and tells her that he didn’t appreciate it, and Brittany says she feels hurt. Stassi says the group is very forgiving, so it often doesn’t register that anything would make anyone feel weird. Kristen wonders who hasn’t seen it, and doesn’t get why Brittany doesn’t think it’s funny, because she’s one of the most dense people ever born.
They discuss Lala. Kristen thinks the only one who can actually screw Lala over is James. Lala says she can’t stand him, but he’s on her Snapchat, so Kristen can’t figure out whether the hate is true or fake. In her interview, Stassi says she knows for a fact that Lala is dating a married man, but they need James to confirm it.
Lala visits James. He asks if she wants ice cream, his new vice since giving up drinking. She tells him she’s a grown ass woman and asks if he has liquor. All he has is whiskey. She wonders what happened, since he used to pop a bottle every other second. He says he’s been working on his music, and asks why she didn’t show for Ariana’s birthday trip. Lala says she decided just before leaving that she wasn’t going. She says she spent the weekend at the Beverly Hills Hotel, but insists her mother paid for it. James wonders why he wasn’t invited over. Lala talks about a trip to Malibu and asks if he’d like to come along. They’re taking a helicopter, and he questions the way she travels. Lala is tired of everyone being on her back about her possibly getting things from being on her back. She’s shocked that none of the other girls have ever taken a private jet, saying that no girl who isn’t ugly hasn’t been on one, because that’s LA. I have no words.
James is meeting Kristen and Stassi. Even though she’s a step away from a restraining order, Kristen is willing to take one for the team, if it means screwing over Lala. In his interview, James wonders what they want, since he knows they’re not interested in socializing with him. Kristen tells him that it seems like he’s close with Lala, although Lala talks smack about him. James seems surprised, but says she has been acting strange. They discuss the married boyfriend. He tells them Lala’s boyfriend rented an amazing house for Coachella, but made everyone sign a non-disclosure agreement. They look at it online. James thinks Tom and Ariana signed it, and Stassi has her suspicions since they always defend Lala.
Brittany’s look-alike mom, Sherri, has come to visit. In his interview, Jax says there will be no sex, no drinking, no cursing, and no pooping with the door open. If I was Brittany, I’d have my mom move in. They discuss Florida. Jax says he’s never raising a family in LA, and this leads Sherri to ask if they go to church. He doesn’t like the old-world style, and Sherri suggests he come to her Pentecostal church, which he thinks is some kind of cult. Jax needs to get out more.
A mansion has been rented for Katie’s shower. Scheana has brought baby bottles of tequila for parting gifts and the buffet is $200 worth of Taco Bell. Stassi tells Scheana about the NDA, and she insists that Tom and Ariana would never have signed something like that.
In the car, Brittany suggests that she and Jax might one day have a shower. And she doesn’t mean the kind you take in the bathroom. Sherri tells Jax it would be a shame to waste Brittany’s time, and he tells her that times have changed. He points to Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. You, Jax, are no Kurt Russell. In his interview, he’s annoyed about the pressure. Ugh! I hate that I’m having to say this, but he’s right. I’m not saying he shouldn’t be making a firm commitment (or not) after a year, but now is not the time. He’s a captive audience, and it’s two against one. Okay. Now back to hating Jax.
Stassi – who is wearing difficult to explain dress with sleeves made from spaghetti strap-like strips, that I imagine are a real pita to get into – claims that Ariana is working the groomsmen situation for all it’s worth. When she wants to, she hangs out with the guys, but she’s at the shower as well. Stassi says Katie didn’t want her around for a reason. Katie is thrilled with the venue, and can’t wait to be Mrs. Bubba Schwartz. Lisa arrives, which thrills her even more.
The guys go out for Mexican food. Jax tells them how he was verbally accosted the whole way there. In his interview, Schwartz thinks one day Jax will go out for something, and the next time they see him will be his mug shot. Ha-ha!
Lisa asks Sherri how she likes Jax. She says she does, and Lisa wonders if it’s enough to have him as a son-in-law. In her interview, Lisa wonders if she’s met the real Jax. I’m still stumped as to why Brittany is so enamored of him. Sherri says they have to get him to church, and Lisa thinks he’s not ready for that. She hopes he doesn’t break Brittany’s heart. Brittany says if he does, she’ll break something of his. The something we already discussed that was in the picture. Lisa thinks that should be put in the wedding vows. Katie’s mom thanks everyone for coming. Lisa says she loves Katie, and she’s a credit to her mom.
Jax talks about going back to Minnesota. He says that no one tells you that marriage is great, they only tell you not to do it. Schwartz suggests they all go to Minnesota. He says he’s not into the institution of marriage, but he wants Katie to be happy. They toast to marriage being the best new thing is Schwartz’s life.
Stassi thinks she should have waited to break up with Patrick until after the wedding. Hmm… I though he broke up with her. Lisa has brought a blow-up doll in case Katie wants to take a break after 30 years. Its name is Katie. No kidding. It’s on the box. Stassi tells Katie about the meeting with James. They ask Ariana about the NDA. She insists she never saw anything like it, but Stassi thinks she’s exhibiting all of the tell-tale signs of lying. Katie thinks Ariana is picking sides, and brings up some old Lala crap, wondering why Ariana is still defending her. Ariana says her thinking is delusional. In her interview, Stassi says Ariana can’t take responsibility for anything. Katie walks away from the conversation.
Ariana says she doesn’t think what Lala has said is cool, but she’s not killing herself over something someone said. Stassi says they’ve all gotten in fights. Ariana says actually, she’s never gotten in a fight with anyone (huh?). Stassi wonders why she’s even there, and Ariana says she cares about Katie, not Stassi. Stassi follows Katie’s footsteps and leaves the room. Pretty soon, Ariana is going to be talking to herself.
Next time, the bachelorette party, Stassi and Ariana tangle, James gets in another fight at work (yay!), and Jax wears a crown.
🏊 Holy! They didn’t even end the previews for Vanderpump Rules before Summer House started. Or as I call it Zzzzzummer Houzzzzze. What’s really biting my butt is that they’ve moved Timber Creek Lodge to 8 p.m. This wouldn’t be so bad, except I watch something else at 8, and Bravo doesn’t rerun it until 2:30 a.m.! Is it really necessary to see the other shows three times before showing TCL a second time? BTW, Stassi should thank her lucky stars that Kyle was insulting and she got turned off. He is nobody’s idea of a good catch – or shouldn’t be anyway. He claims Montauk is like DisneyWorld for adults, and that you never know how or where you’ll wake up. First of all, those aren’t qualities that I would assign DisneyWorld, not to mention that I’m sure the city of Montauk thanks you, and secondly, no, just no. Watching these people drink makes my stomach turn.
✍ Just a footnote: I saw Ariana on Watch What Happens Live, and she mentioned that one of the girls claimed she had a superiority complex, and this is far from the truth. In watching Vanderpump Rules a second time, think of that buzzer sound when they get the question wrong on Family Feud. She acts very superior. Like she’s above it all. Constantly. I believe she thinks she’s being mature in some way, but it’s never a bad thing to be polite. Lecture over.
Quotes for MLK Day
Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.
Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.
– Martin Luther King, Jr.