What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
Jason explains that Sam told him Alexis was having difficulty with her sobriety, so she was staying over. Alexis shows him her 30-day chip, and says oddly enough, it’s the one day she’s not struggling. Jason tries Sam’s phone and it rings from Alexis’s purse. Oh-ho! So that’s what Olivia-J put in there. Did she think Alexis would never notice? Okay, if it was in my purse, it might take a while, but did she think it was never going to ring?
Olivia-J comes back to her room. Julian, who is handcuffed to the radiator with a hood over his head, asks if the psycho witch is back. She takes the hood off, and says she thought they should wait together for the news about GH.
Finn asks to speak privately to Hayden. Tracy says she can take a hint. Finn tells Hayden that he’ll do anything. He doesn’t want to lose her
Felicia joins Bobbie at the MetroCourt. Bobbie says she hasn’t been able to sleep since Felicia told her about Nelle’s secret. She asks if Felicia is sure it’s true, and she says absolutely.
Michael and Nelle get back from the cabin. Nelle tells Michael that he has to go and save the hospital, and she has to take care of one thing. After that, she can start over.
Carly and Sonny bask in the afterglow. Carly says she’s going home – to pack, and explain to Josslyn that she’s moving back in with him.
Monica asks Tracy if they have enough votes to save the hospital. Tracy tells her not until Laura shows up.
Olivia-J tells Julian that Laura got sidetracked, and he’ll get to live. He asks what she did with Sam.
Alexis wonders how the phone got in her purse. Jason asks if she left her purse anywhere. She says she only stepped away from it when she was talking with her sponsor. Jason shows her a picture of Olivia-J and asks if she recognizes it. Alexis says that’s her sponsor.
Felicia tells Bobbie that she contacted another teacher who’d been a friend of Nelle’s. Bobbie wonders why a stranger would tell Felicia anything. Felicia says that besides having an honest face, she’d explained that Nelle is on the short list to be Crimson’s woman of the month, and she was interviewing people who know her.
Carly tells Sonny that she hadn’t grieved Morgan properly. She wanted to bury herself in Sonny’s arms, but couldn’t. He tells her that he missed her. Thanksgiving night he was sure their marriage was done and that she was going back to Jax. He imagined the worst. She says that’s over, and she’s here with him now. They kiss
Nelle tells Michael that his words affected her, and she’s going to end what she started. He asks why she’s taking all the blame, and what about her boyfriend? She says he’s involved, and it would devastate his wife. Michael made her realize that she would only end up devastating herself. She’s been focused on the past, and wants to look to the future and spend more time with him. She says at the end of the night, she’ll be free to focus on him and whatever they decide to do.
Nelle says she feels like a new person. Michael tells her not to change too much. He leaves, and she tosses out the phone with the audio file on it and deletes the copy on her laptop. She says all that’s left now is what she sent to Carly. Like an idiot though, she leaves the dialogue box that says “Sonny audio file deleted” up on the computer screen.
Sonny tells Carly that they should make if official. She says she never filed for divorce, but he suggests renewing their vows. She adds, for the sixth time. He says he’s not the best Catholic, but he likes the ritual of his faith. He’d also like Griff to be the officiant. Carly says that’s fine, if he’s willing. Bobble texts Carly to meet her about something important. Sonny says he’s going to win Bobbie over yet, starting with making her daughter happy. Carly says she didn’t think she’d ever be happy again, but she is, and she loves him. He says he loves her too.
Hayden doesn’t want to be responsible for whether or not Finn goes to rehab. He asks Hayden to give him a chance. She tells him to let her do her job, and he wishes her luck with the board. No one has seen Laura, and they need her vote. Gray says it’s time to start. Tracy tells him that Michael and Laura are on their way
Julian asks again what Olivia-J did. She pours herself a stiff one, and says there was an accident. She tells Julian that Sam attacked her, and wound up falling off a bridge.
Jason asks Alexis if she’s sure. Alexis says she is, and wants to know who it is in the picture. Jason tells her it’s Olivia Jerome, who was presumed dead. Alexis is shocked that her sponsor is Julian’s sister. Jason says he thinks she’s been pulling Julian’s strings for a while, and that she set up the car bomb that killed Morgan. He figures that her being Alexis’s sponsor is a front, and one more thing she has over him. Alexis remembers walking in on them talking. She says Julian knew she was being duped and never said a word. They both suddenly remember that Sam is missing, and Alexis wonders if Olivia got to her.
Sam hears sirens in the distance, and tells Scout that help is coming.
Julian can’t believe that Olivia-J left Sam after she fell. He tells her that Sam is pregnant, and he can’t understand how she can be so heartless. Olivia says Sam attacked her, and she didn’t intend to hurt her. He’s the one who’s heartless, and deserves what she’s thrown at him. Alexis calls Julian. Olivia wonders why she’s calling.
Alexis leaves a message for Julian, saying that his sister Olivia is her sponsor, and she’s done something to Sam. Alexis wants to call Olivia-J and set her up, but Jason tells her not to.
Sam calls out that she’s down at the bottom of the hill. The sirens fade, and she realizes it wasn’t for them. She tells Scout it’s okay, but starts feeling pain.
Michael shows up at the board meeting. Tracy says a member is running behind schedule, and asks to postpone. Gray won’t go for it, and Michael says maybe Laura will show before they vote. Hayden presents her proposal, and Tracy starts asking questions. Gray says she’s stalling, and wants a vote. Monica asks Hayden to leave per policy.
Monica sees Obrecht in the hallway, and she tells Monica that she has something to do in the boardroom. Monica says there’s a board meeting going on, and what business could she have with it?
Sonny finds Griff at the hospital, and Griff tells him about the sickout. Sonny says he can’t provide nurses, but if he needs other workers, he can supply them. Griff says he’ll let him know. Sonny tells him about getting back together with Carly, and how they want to renew their vows with him officiating. Griff asks whose idea it was, and Sonny says it was his. He asks if it has anything to do with Sonny cheating on Carly.
Nelle goes through the mail at the office, but can’t find the envelope. She asks the mail guy where yesterday’s mail is, and he tells her that Bobbie was there organizing it for Carly.
Carly joins Bobbie. Nelle texts that she’s back, and Carly explains what happened with the cabin. Bobbie says Nelle is the reason she needed to see Carly. She says there’s no easy way, and tells her about Felicia investigating Nelle’s background, and that she found something big.
Michael says the board is deadlocked. Monica says there can be no resolution until Laura arrives. Obrecht says that’s where she comes in, to break the tie.
The pharmaceutical guy meets Finn at the bar. Finn says he researched the company, and they’re more about greed than healing people. He says the cure is mostly needed in underdeveloped countries. He believes they’re going to take his formula, tweak it, jack up the price, and make money. The guy says there are other applications, which is why they’re interested. Finn says no thanks, but the guy makes him an offer, doing that writing it on a piece of paper thing.
Griff tells Sonny that this is no way to move forward from one night stand, pretending that it didn’t happen. He says secrets are rarely kept, and how it comes out is what matters.
Nelle tells the mail guy that he shouldn’t have given Bobbie the mail, since she makes everything a bigger deal than it needs to be. He thinks it was just junk anyway. Nelle asks if she opened anything, but he doesn’t know.
Bobbie tells Carly that Nelle is bad news, and Carly will be hurt the most. Carly says she can handle it. Bobbie reminds her when Nelle decided not to take the job in Atlanta. Carly says it was because of Nelle’s boyfriend. Thinking Bobbie is focusing on Nelle’s boyfriend being married, she says that both she and Bobbie have made those mistakes. Bobbie tells her the S stands for Sonny. This is what Felicia found out? And she went to Atlanta to do it? I was hoping for something we didn’t know. Like the real connection between Nelle and Carly.
Finn slides the offer back. He’s not selling the formula unless it’s on his terms, which means getting it to the people who need it. Pharm guy says with this money he could find all kinds of cures. Finn says that he already did, and doesn’t want it out of his control. Never. Pharm guy writes another offer. Finn makes a hmmm… face, and says that’s a lot of money. He tears the paper in half. The pharm guy leaves his card in case Finn changes his mind.
Hayden wonders why Obrecht gets a vote. Tracy says she probably made herself an alternate during her reign of terror. Tracy says it’s not legal, but Michael says it is. Obrecht says that a privately owned hospital can turn away needy patients. Tracy is glad they’re both concerned with the less fortunate.
Olivia-J tells Julian that the board is going to be voting, and they’ll see if Julian lives or dies. He says she buys GH, then what? She says he’ll see, and that it’s going to be epic.
Alexis calls the police. They take the report, but won’t act on it, and Jason says it’s up to them. He finds a picture on Sam’s phone from inside Olivia-J’s car. Jason says he thinks he knows where it is, and tells Alexis who to contact in the meantime. He tells her that if she needs verification of anything, to call Curtis, and he takes off.
Sam is having contractions. She asks if Scout can wait. She starts to climb again, and has another contraction. She says they’re coming too fast.
Nelle tears the place apart looking for the envelope. She wonders what Bobbie did with it, and says she’d better not have given it to Carly, but thinks Michael or Carly would have said something to her by now.
Sonny tells Griff that Carly is close to the woman he slept with, and thinks she’s the greatest. Griff says if the truth comes out from someone else, that will make it worse. Sonny says he can’t figure out the woman’s game. He tells himself that she won’t say anything, but realizes it’s a huge risk.
Carly says, Nelle is having an affair with Sonny? Bobbie says Felicia found a friend of hers who said she’s involved with her boss’s husband. It’s serious, and she’s terrified that her boss will find out. Let me just stop here and wonder why on earth a friend of Nelle’s would tell Felicia this, when she claimed to be interviewing for a woman of the month story. Carly says Bobbie has never liked Nelle, and seems to have all the answers. Bobbie tells Carly that there were signs. Maybe she didn’t want to see them, but they were there. She says for one thing, Sonny always got weird when talking about Nelle, and warned Michael away from her. Carly says she knows Sonny. He would never do this, and she’s going to prove it.
Finn asks Monica how it’s going, and she says not good. At the meeting, Obrecht says the hospital is going under; it’s inevitable. If it’s going down, she doesn’t want the Quartermaines to have all the power. When she was Chief of Staff, Tracy voted to fire her, and that was a big mistake. She votes in favor of the real estate developer.
Julian gets a message about the vote. Olivia says she won GH and he won a stay of execution. Julian wants to find Sam.
Sam is busy going into labor. She asks Scout to wait, but doesn’t think Scout is listening. Jason arrives at the foot bridge. He calls out to Sam and she hears him. For the love of all that’s holy, Jason, just look down. He keeps calling, but Sam can’t answer.
Carly knocks on Nelle’s door. No answer. She starts to leave, but finds a key under the mat. She lets herself in. Really? She looks around. No Nelle. She says Sonny isn’t interested in Nelle, and doesn’t even like her. She sees the dialogue box about the Sonny file being deleted on Nelle’s laptop.
Sonny tells Griff that he was going to come clean to Carly, but she had the night planned and was so happy. He didn’t want to cause her more pain. Griff says it will be worse if she finds out from someone else. He can’t let that happen.
Nelle finds the envelope. She says everything is going to be okay, and Carly will never know.
Carly ponders why there would be a recording of Sonny, and why it would be deleted. She sees the phone in the wastebasket and wonders what’s on it. She sits on the couch with the laptop and plugs it in. Dammit! She plays the file. She hears Sonny say that under no circumstance is Carly to know that he and Nelle had sex.
Tomorrow, Monica says they’ll know any minute, Bobbie tells Nelle game over, and Jason is still calling for Sam who is a few feet away from him.
Ariana suggests to Tom that Vegas is at the root of Schwartz and Katie’s issues. Tom asks what about the four years before that? Schwartz says he’s done, and doesn’t want to marry Katie.
We flash back to Jax’s big mouth about Schwartz’s dalliance, and Katie says maybe Ariana is right. She says she squelched her feelings, and didn’t want to discuss it to protect Schwartz. Stassi says she wishes she’d known, but it was during the time they were estranged.
Tom claims that Schwartz proposed because of an ultimatum. He thinks maybe Katie should have worked her own stuff out first. Scheana says he must love her, or he wouldn’t have done it. Tom screeches that Schwartz is a battered wife, and to look at him! He flings the door open to Schwartz sitting on the bed still in drag. So is Tom, and they look like something out of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?
Katie says that she must be the dumbest [sic] woman on the planet, and Jax doesn’t get why Schwartz doesn’t just apologize. He thinks Katie should demand the truth. Schwartz walks in. He calls Katie a bitch, and Stassi tells him to knock it off. He says he wishes cheating really was their problem, and stumbles back out.
Brittany brings up the altercation the night before, and doesn’t like how the guys were discussing Kristen without her being there. Kristen thinks Tom is just creating problems and should stay out of it. Katie talks to Stassi, saying that Schwartz only 20% admitted to cheating. Whatever that means. She felt that she’d put a lot of time into the relationship already, and didn’t want to let it ruin things. In his interview, Jax brings up how Tom keeps saying Schwartz couldn’t have cheated when he was so drunk. He says that when he’s drinking, his brain shuts down, not his other head. I’m guessing this actually depends on several factors, including the individual. Jax thinks this isn’t normal, and that Schwartz should call things off. He says that Schwartz should approach Katie and say they’re supposed to be a team. That sounds like two different things.
Jax asks the girls to clear out, and give Schwartz and Katie privacy, but Katie doesn’t want to talk. She says she’s not ready, and besides, Schwartz is still wearing a dress and sporting a smoky eye. She thinks he’s blackout drunk, and they should revisit things in the morning. Jax explains what happened in Vegas to Brittany, and that Schwartz basically admitted to hooking up. If my memory serves me right, I don’t think Schwartz ever actually said he did anything other than making out. It was Jax who kept assuming he’d had sex.
Stassi tells Schwartz he’s being an a-hole. He says he made out with a chick when he was drunk, and tells Stassi she had a good run with Patrick. Stassi wonders what her choices in men have to do with Schwartz cheating on Katie.
Katie tells someone to close the blinds, reminding me of Kari Wuhrer in Beastmaster 2. Schwartz is still staggering around in his dress. He goes to Jax and Brittany’s room. Ariana wakes up to Tom’s manicure. Tom says that Schwartz and Katie throw tantrums like toddlers, and wake up not even remembering what they were arguing about. Shay dips into some snacks he’s left next to the bed. Scheana thinks everyone should stay sober until the wedding. She tells Shay that it’s a good thing they’re doing a prenup. Scheana isn’t the brightest bulb in the SUR box, but occasionally, she can be the voice of reason.
In her interview, Stassi says Katie and Schwartz have been fighting about the same things for years. We flash back to some of that. She says she’s trying to support them as a couple, but it’s hard.
Lisa arrives at SUR. Cashier, Katie-O (ugh! double Katies now), wants to become a server, and Lisa says she’ll put her through the paces. She likes when people come through the ranks. She gives us several examples, and ends with James, who started as a busser, rose to a server, then a DJ, and then got fired.
Katie calls Lisa, telling her they’ve had some flare-ups. Lisa asks if they’re looking for problems. She says they shouldn’t be fighting now, and that there will be tough times ahead. She tells Katie to patch things up and get the relationship back on track.
Everyone gathers at the pool. Tom passes out shirts with funny names on them that he had made. Schwartz wonders what happened, and everyone wonders where Katie is. In his interview, Schwartz says the worst nightmare of a combined bachelor/bachelorette party has come true, and his best choice is to run away and start fresh somewhere.
Stassi, Katie and Kristen visit Stassi’s childhood home. Her father is putting it on the market, and she wants to see it one last time. She talks about the memories, and how she had so many sleepovers, her father started thinking she was a lesbian. She’s very hungover, and keeps throwing up. Her grandmother is also there, and she says her grandmother is everything she aspires to be, but her grandmother is way nicer. Stassi is getting sentimental, and Grandma says once everything is gone, it’s only a house. I am so down with that, having gone through the selling of my own childhood home when my father died. I’ve always said that once he was gone, it was just a house and no longer a home. They go down Memory Lane. We see some retro photos, and find out that Stassi’s grandmother is the one who named her.
Jax reminds Schwartz of all the things he said the night before, but Schwartz says he was just being cynical. Jax says they can’t afford another blow up. In his interview, Jax says sometimes you have to apologize whether you’re sorry or not. He says his father always tells him happy wife, happy life. Joe Giudice will tell you that too.
Katie says she needs at least twenty more hours of sleep. Stassi thinks the problem isn’t Tequila Katie, but Tequila Tom. Katie says the silver lining is that people finally got to see Schwartz at his worst. Stassi announces that the girls won the weekend.
Lisa goes through some role playing with Katie-O. She says it can be intimidating, but if a server can get past her, they can get past anyone. She says they can make or break a diner’s experience. Katie stumbles through the menu somewhat. Lisa says she has to know it inside out and upside down, and she’s not ready yet.
Katie tells Schwartz that he was coming at everyone last night, and he should just admit he slept with that girl. He says he didn’t. She says she’s not doing this anymore, but he wants to work through it, and wants her to drop the Vegas thing. He says she was a nightmare from the jump, and Katie tells him that he had an option. He put a ring on it, so stop throwing it in her face all the time. Schwartz sprays whipped cream into his mouth straight from the container, and Katie thinks that they should do this later. He takes a shot of vodka, and she suggests that he stop criticizing her and reminding her of every sh*tty thing she’s done. He asks her to stop bringing up Vegas. He says he loves her, and they should just have some fun. These two wear me out, and I’m just watching them on TV.
Katie calls Schwartz a Bridezilla. He wants to salvage the last night. Everyone goes to the bar. More shots! In his interview, Schwartz says heavy drinking tears them apart, but it’s also the glue that brings them back together. It’s a cycle, and a vicious one at times. I could say a lot here, but why bother? They move on to playing spin-the-bottle. In her interview, Scheana says she’s happy she’s married, since this group is crazy about kissing one another. Schwartz says this is his last kiss before getting married, and it’s Tom. Stassi gets Peter, who thinks it’s weird, because they dated briefly. Schwartz says the party should have been like this from the beginning. Peter and Stassi start getting into some serious kissing.
Tom joins Kristen, who is having a smoke outside. She tells him he’s a giant a-hole. She asks why he feels the need to talk to her boyfriend about her past. She says he stepped into the swamp, and she wants to know why he’d talk to Carter about things that happened years ago, adding that Carter knows more than he does. Tom says they were bombarding Schwartz, and Carter came into the situation, talking like he’d been there. Kristen says she’s a different person now. Tom apologizes, and says he doesn’t want to talk about the past, and wants them to be cool. We flash back to their weepy conversation in Miami. He says that book is closed.
Giggy! Harrison! Schnooky! Lisa sips tea and works, while she lounges in bed with the dogs. Ken joins them. She thinks they should do a young restaurant with some young partners. Maybe groom somebody to take the pressure off a bit. She wonders if, with some guidance, Tom might be ready. She says he’s an excellent bartender, and she believes he’s hungry. She and Ken banter. That’s not a euphemism for anything. They have some witty repartee. I have to add that even though he’s usually snoozing while being carried around, Giggy can be quite lively when there is the prospect of food.
A Murphy bed is pulled down in the bar (!), and the gang makes Katie lie on it, demanding that Schwartz give her a lap dance. Jax throws money at them, and Schwartz pulls down his pants. Everyone has a shot. Of booze. Scheana says their relationship is like being on a roller coaster. She hopes they don’t come crashing down when gravity happens.
Back in the girls’ suite, Stassi opens champagne. Tom talks to the guys about his conversation with Kristen. Katie draws on Schwartz’s face as he drifts off into a drunken stupor.
The next morning, Brittany says she feels like death. Jax is wearing a bra insert on his face, thinking it’s something for puffy eyes. Brittany asks him not to post any pictures of himself in drag on social media, since her mother has enough of an issue thinking he’s gay.
Shay tells Scheana that he thinks Schwartz has a lot of built up frustration, and that marriage means a lot of adjustment. He’s so wise, that Shay.
Stassi feels successful for going to NOLA and kissing a guy, even if the guy was Peter. Schwartz is glad he and Katie pulled things together. In his interview, he says any issues they haven’t resolved, they don’t have time for. They’re setting that bottle out to sea. Katie wants to put the wedding train back on the tracks.
Next time, the annual SUR pictures, Scheana feels left out, Stassi goes on a date, and Katie and Schwartz ask Lisa to officiate at the wedding.
🏊 Just a quick note about Summer House, which I’ve been watching when it’s convenient. These people are in their 30s with seriously good jobs – what has happened to the world? While I probably did drink a lot in my 30s, I didn’t behave like I was in middle school (or junior high, if you’re from my neck of the woods). Tonight, the gang got on a party bus with a stripper pole, and as with the proverbial train wreck, I couldn’t turn away. Everyone slinging back booze, publicly displaying various affections, and swinging from the rafters. Or at least from the pole. I have no doubt, had I been privy to the Hamptons during my youth, I would have partied, but Not. Like. This. I can’t even imagine what desperate need for attention would prompt this group to display their immature selves on TV. Isn’t anyone concerned that their boss might see this? I’m both flabbergasted and appalled.
💃 Little Women: LA starts its new season tomorrow, Tuesday at 9 pm. Opposite The Haves and the Have Nots and The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Thanks, Lifetime! I really want to catch this season too, since Terra was on Dancing with the Stars. This week is the HAHN finale though, so hopefully this will only be painful the first time.