Monthly Archives: March 2017

March 30, 2017 – Nina Says the Magic Words, Two Junior Chefs Return & Landon is Still an Idiot


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Tracy tells Laura that while she’s looking for the painting, Laura can check out her old stomping grounds in Turkey and eat baklava. Plus, it will give Doc a chance to miss her. Laura says sorry, but she’s not going to Turkey.

Curtis’s phone rings. It’s Jason. He says he needs help; it’s about Jake. He says he’ll explain later, and asks if Curtis is in. Curtis says he is. They make plans to meet in the morning.

Sam tells Jason they should relax; she thinks lightening is about to strike. Jason says he thinks Jake could be in some real trouble.

Elizabeth leaves a message for Franco. She didn’t like how they left things, and asks him to call her back. She adds, please don’t do anything crazy.

Nina sees Franco in the foyer and asks who let him in. Franco says the butler did it. He has a wedding gift.

One of the gunmen at The Floating Rib shakes everyone down for their phones. No sudden moves; hands visible. He tells Ava that she’s beautiful and grabs her. She tells him not to hurt her; she has children. He says he doesn’t give a crap. One wrong move, and he blows her away.

Curtis tells Jordan that he’d rather be kissing her openly in public, and they’ve earned it. She says it’s been a long and winding road. Okay, Paul McCartney. He asks if they’re there yet, and she says depends on the destination. They kiss. Publicly.

Jason tells Sam about the drawings. He says that Elizabeth found a scarecrow drawn in the blank space. Jake claims to have no idea where it came from, but according to Franco, it’s definitely Jake’s work. Sam wonders why this happened, since Jake seemed to be doing well. Jason tells her that because of everything she went through, Jake thinks Helena’s curse is at work.

Kiki is volunteering at the hospital and runs into Elizabeth. Kiki tells her that she’s thinking of becoming a nurse’s aide. She’s working the psyche ward. She promised that when Morgan died, she’d do something to honor him and get over her grief. Elizabeth adds, and her guilt. Kiki asks if Elizabeth has spoken to Franco recently; she’s worried about him.

Franco tells Nina it will only take a second. She unwraps the package. It’s a home brewing kit. He says now she can make her own in the privacy of her mausoleum. She tells him she already has one, but it’s good to have a spare.

The gunman says all valuables in the bag, including gum and candy. Is he five? Olivia-F tells him he’s going to get laughed out of the pawn shop with her jewelry. Ava and Lucy empty their bags, and the gunman sees the sculpture and bottle of pills saying what do we have here? Ava flashes back to switching the pills. This is actually a win for her if he steals them.

Tracy wonders why Laura won’t help her. She says she’s being swindled; she’s not looking for a girl’s trip. She tells Laura that it’s about her father and his painting, and Larry wants half the value. She says she’s going to Turkey regardless, but Laura still says no; she has a life. Tracy says Doc will be fine, but Laura says she’s not comfortable leaving Lulu. The custody hearing was a nightmare, and she can’t believe a snake like that is raising a child. Laura says she’s going to rectify it. Tracy asks how.

Jordan asks Curtis if it was worth the wait, and he tells her that it was. He thanks her for dinner, and has no complaints. Except one – the night is coming to an end.

The gunman has Lucy help fill the bag. He tells her to leave out the sculpture because it’s ugly. Lucy puts the pills in the bag. The gunman near Ned and Olivia-F’s table tells them that he’s not blind, and to put the ring in the bag.

Kiki hates seeing Franco being quiet. Elizabeth says she does too, and he’s not returning her calls. She says she had to slow things down because of Jason.

Sam says Jake wouldn’t know about the curse, but Jason says Helena might have put it in his head. Sam says she’s the opposite of cursed, and asks what she can do to help. Jason wishes he knew what’s what, and wonders if Franco is just trying to be the good guy or maybe get to him. Sam says that’s beside the point.

Nina asks Franco why he’s really there, and he says he needs to talk to someone. She thinks it’s weird, but says they can talk. He says it’s about him, Elizabeth, and her kid. Nina asks how self-centered he can be. Asking her for advice is weird enough, but it’s about being a father to Elizabeth’s child. He says sorry. She says it’s okay, and thanks him because she’s happy now. She didn’t like the way things ended, but will never regret that they did.

Jason says Franco may be the point. Sam says they can make Jake feel like he’s loved and supported. Jason says that he told Franco to back off. Sam asks how that went, and Jason says Franco took it better than Elizabeth when he said he might have to rethink their custody agreement.

Franco tells Nina about Jason. She asks is he going to miss Elizabeth or Jake? He says Jake was their connection in the beginning, but he doesn’t want to live without either one. She says don’t then, but she has no idea how.

Elizabeth tells Kiki what Jason said about Franco, and Kiki asks who is Jason to be telling her what to do? Elizabeth says Jake’s father. Kiki tells her not to let Jason come between them. She says Elizabeth has to change Jason’s mind, but Elizabeth says he doesn’t trust Franco. It doesn’t matter to him that Franco changed when the tumor was removed. Elizabeth says she loves Franco, and knows he’s a good person. She tells Kiki that Her boys are better off with him, and Kiki says it’s her life, her kids, and she gets to call the shots.

Curtis and Jordan flirt, and she suggests leaving the restaurant. Her phone rings. It’s the station. They had a call that an alarm was triggered at The Floating Rib. Curtis says it’s probably nothing.

Ava asks the gunman to let them go now. Lucy says they’ve cooperated and done whatever they’ve been told to do. Meanwhile, at Ned’s table, Olivia-F won’t give up the ring. She says it’s priceless. It was given to Ned’s grandmother by the love of her life, and now Ned wants to give it to her. It symbolizes the faith and hope to take the leap. Ned tells her that it’s not worth it.  The gunmen switch places. The guy who was holding Ava tells Olivia that his brother is nicer than he is. He cocks the gun and says to give him the ring now.

Sam asks if Jason is threatening to take Jake away, but Jason says no. He wonders how Franco is involved in his life at all. Sam says she’d love to trust that Elizabeth would never endanger her children. She thinks that in Elizabeth’s mind, she lives for her kids, but she’s dating Franco, who’s done so much damage. She loves him, and allows her children to be around him, despite what anyone else says. Jason asks if she thinks Elizabeth has a blind spot. Sam says the important thing is figuring out what’s happening with Jake, and focusing on a fight is the last thing he needs.

Elizabeth hopes that Jason calms down and realizes he’s overreacting. Kiki says what if he doesn’t, and asks if she’s going to keep Franco away. Elizabeth says they’re still together, but it’s not the right timing for him to move in. She says she’ll do anything to keep her kids with her, and Kiki asks if she’d ditch Franco if Jason insisted.

Nina tells Franco about the custody hearing. He says it must have given her experience, but Nina says it’s different, since she and Valentin are married. In the eyes of the law, Franco is nothing to Jake, but Jason has legal rights. Franco tells Nina that she’s a genius. He’ll marry Elizabeth.

Laura says that the hearing outcome was disappointing. Tracy says Lulu isn’t defeated, and Laura says she’s still not going. Tracy says Laura will just slow her down anyway, since she’ll want to smell the flowers and taste the spices. She just wants to honor her father. She says she’ll hire guards for security, but Laura says has to fit in with the culture. Someone like her could be intimidating, and Laura suggests she at least learn some Turkish. She tells Tracy that she can’t just barge into other people’s countries with an entourage. Tracy asks why not? That’s how she gets things done.

The gunman says the ring must be worth something if Olivia-F is willing to die for it. Ned tells her to give him the ring, and she says she can’t. The gunman starts to count down, and Ned moves toward him. We hear a gunshot.

Jordan enters with backup and Curtis, and the gunmen are captured. Curtis says she’s still got it. Everyone is unscathed, and Ned says her timing is impeccable. Olivia-F says that Ned could have been killed. He says he didn’t want to see her die over a stupid ring. She says Lila is the patron saint of Port Charles, and she didn’t want his hands on it. Ned says between the ring and her, he chooses her. Olivia says he almost took a bullet for her, and he says he’d do it again, but would prefer not to. He says she’s terrified of marriage, but someone waving a gun her face is no problem. She reminds him that she’s from Bensonhurst. She says she thought she lost everything. They tell each other I love you, and he says that he’s sorry about pressuring her. He doesn’t want to wreck what they have. If she’s not ready for marriage, he understands. She laughs, and wonders what she was thinking. She has to get out of her own way and stop letting her insecurities call the shots instead of her heart. She talks about him being father figure to Leo. She says he can back off, but now she’s coming for him. She asks him to marry her. He says no. Just kidding. He says nothing would make him prouder or happier. She says she’s marrying a rock star.

Lucy blathers on, and Jordan says the gunmen are going away for a long time. Ava says she just wants to get her stuff, and moves toward the bag, but Jordan says that’s not possible.

Kiki tells Elizabeth that she has a chance at an amazing life, and not to let Jason take it away. He’s not the only one who deserves to be happy.

Nina hustles Franco toward the door, saying marrying Elizabeth will solve all his problems, and marriage is great. He thanks her for talking.

Jason tells Sam that maybe they can figure out how to handle things without Jake reliving it in some stranger’s office. Sam says a therapist isn’t a threat, and sometimes talking to a stranger is a good thing. She tells him not to worry; they’ll fix it. Jason says that Curtis is starting in morning, and Sam says that gives them time to come up with game plan, but Jason says he’s already started.

Laura tells Tracy, fine, she’ll go. Tracy says no, she’ll do it herself, and Laura calls her impossible. She says she’ll go for Edward’s sake. But that’s not the only reason, and Tracy isn’t the only one who’s grateful.

Jordan says everything in the bag is evidence and Ava will get it back later. On the side, Lucy says too bad for Ava, but not for her, and reaches for the sculpture. Ava says no pills, no statue. Lucy says she held up her end of the bargain. Ava says the pills are on the way to the station, and Lucy says that’s not her problem.

Jordan wonders if Curtis might have second thoughts about the PCPD, but he doesn’t. She has to get back to work, and he says when they finally get together, it’s going to be epic. She tells him that he has no idea.

Kiki tells Elizabeth to call Franco and tell him that she’s wrong. If Jason tries anything, she should fight for her kids – and Franco. Kiki goes back to work, and Franco arrives. He says he has to ask Elizabeth a question. He gets down on one knee and asks her to marry him.

Jason shows up at Windemere. He tells Nina that he needs to speak to Valentin. It’s about his son.

On Monday, Lulu sucks up to Nelle, Laura tells Lulu she’s going to Turkey, and Jason asks Valentin for a favor.

🍜 In similar fashion to Top Chef‘s Last Chance Kitchen, two contestants were brought back to MasterChef Junior. The kids had to butcher a chicken (no, not all that – they basically had to separate the pieces of a whole one) – one more thing I would have stunk at – and the challenge winner decided who got what piece to cook with. The giblets were not a favorite. I love how the kids seem to actually forget that they’re in a competition and root hard for one another. In his parting interview, one contestant told us that he wanted to grow-up to be a cross between Justin Bieber and Gordon Ramsay. I don’t know about that, but I wouldn’t mind having their combined bank accounts. Next time, the kids will be cooking for the Boy Scouts in the great outdoors.

🍸 I’ve been watching the last Southern Charm reunion in preparation for the new season. I’d forgotten how awful Landon is. Seriously, there’s something wrong with her. Except for her earrings. Those are perfect. One of the highlights to look forward to, is an Indian psychic healer who tells the group that Landon is Thomas’s soulmate. I’d say that’s right on the money, since neither one of them have one.

March 29, 2017 – Anna’s Truth is Revealed & Quoting Oprah


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Curtis and Jordan meet for dinner. They reminisce over the drinks Jordan ordered for the both of them. Jordan toasts to more good times working together, and Curtis asks if that’s a job offer.

Ava says that Tracy has never shown her any kindness. Now she needs Ava’s expertise, and Ava has debts. Tracy starts to leave, saying how many auction houses could there be? Hundreds just in Istanbul, according to Ava. Tracy says she made her point, and Ava asks if she wants help or not.

Nathan tells Dante that Maxie is on her way to Portland, but it’s not to visit Georgie.

Amy II tells Griff that she’s been chosen for a special task. She says it’s huge, but Nina interrupts, looking for a pediatrician. Griff says he can direct her to the right person. Amy runs off to spread her good news. Griff suggests a doctor. Nina asks Griff to tell Anna to back off her husband.

Valentin tells Anna that they were lovers – she was his lover, but he was her dupe. He says he walked into her honey trap.

Olivia-F meets Ned and manages to be on time. Ned tells her about Larry’s proposal, and says he’s concerned about Tracy getting involved.

Tracy gives Ava a check and says she’ll get the rest when she finds the painting. Ava asks questions about the piece.

Jordan says Curtis’s work helped bring Olivia-J to justice. She spoke to the brass in Baltimore, and they’re willing to reinstate his credentials, which means she can hire him. He says he won’t be taking the job.

Amy Part 2 says this email will change her life. No more standing on the sidelines; she gets to shine.

Griff tells Nina that it’s the other way around; Valentin is bothering Anna. Nina asks for an example, but he can’t come up with anything. She tells Griff about Anna breaking in, and how Valentin didn’t press charges. She says she wants peace for her family. He says he can’t control Anna’s actions, and Nina says that Anna can’t control herself, and might need an intervention.

Anna remembers nothing. Valentin says how pathetically he wanted to believe her, especially after her rejection. She says if it’s true, she’d admit it. The only thing she remembers is him trying to kiss her on her birthday. He congratulates her on the ability to forget the worst about herself. He remembers everything, and it’s very unflattering to both of them.

Anna keeps saying she doesn’t remember. After he tried to kiss her, they went their separate ways. Valentin says that he doesn’t know if the DVX pushed her toward him or it was her idea. His security clearance was higher than hers, and he was contacted by the DVX through her.

Griff tells Nina that if she’s so concerned, maybe there’s something Valentin isn’t telling her. Nina tells Griff that he’s supposed to be a priest and non-judgmental, yet he broke his vows by having an affair with a married woman. He says he doesn’t want to see her hurt, and asks how Anna can come between them, or has she already? Nina tells him have good night, addressing him as father.

Nathan tells Dante that he tried to broker a peace between Nina and Maxie, but it didn’t work. Maxie tried finding work in the city, but that didn’t happen either.

Jordan asks why Curtis is turning her down when he hounded her so much about it? She thinks it’s because she’s been so awful. He says awful is an understatement, and she apologizes. She says she’s been reflecting, and lashing out at him was really about her own guilt. Seeing him reminded her about cheating on his brother and lying about TJ’s paternity. He asks if she hasn’t forgiven herself, and she says she thinks she has, but she’d like him to forgive her too.

Ava tells Tracy that there are a lot of legal constraints in Turkey. Tracy tells her about a painting by the artist recently being appraised at $20 million. Ava messes around on her phone and finds the auction house that dealt with the painting. Tracy tells her to write it down, and she’ll write the check. If Ava is wrong or conning her though, she’s stopping payment.

Ned tells Olivia-F on second thought, let Tracy do what she wants. Tonight is about them. Not wasting any time, he asks her to marry him again.

Curtis tells Jordan that there was a time he blamed her for anything wrong with his brother, but she’s a changed woman. He lists her good qualities, but adds that she’s a little confused about what she wants in a man.

Tracy sits at one of the tables She tries to call the auction house, but can’t find someone who speaks English. Laura joins her because Doc blew off their date. Tracy tells Laura that you would think they’d have people who speak English in Istanbul, and where is she going to find someone who speaks Turkish? Oddly enough, Laura does. Of course. Why am I not surprised?

Ava tells Lucy that she has two checks. As soon as she deposits them, Lucy gets her bribe. Lucy corrects her, saying she only asked for a donation. She looks at the checks, and says they wouldn’t cover her wardrobe. She’s keeping Morgan’s meds.

Olivia-F says how much she loves Ned and blah-blah-blah. She wants to spend her life with him, and there’s no other man for her. He tells her to say yes then. She says she wants what they have right now to continue, and why do they need a document? She asks why marriage is so important.

Nathan tells Dante that Maxie is filling in for an assistant editor while she’s away for three months. Dante wonders why Nathan didn’t join her.

Valentin tells Anna that she’d told him she missed him. He betrayed his instincts and believed her. She told him that she was on special assignment, and needed intel. She thought her life was in danger, and it wasn’t until he was being questioned that he realized she’d made him a traitor. Anna says she’d never do that. She did sell out and risked her own life, but she wouldn’t do it to someone else. Valentin tells her that he’d joined the WSB to make something of himself and do something good, and she took it from him. He starts to cry, and she says how sorry she is. He says she broke his heart and broke him. She looked right into his eyes and told him that he was beautiful. No one had ever been so kind. Anna touches his cheek. Nina walks in and asks what Anna is doing to her husband.

Nina asks what Anna is doing there. Anna says she had to find something out, and Nina says she doesn’t want to see her there again. Anna says she won’t, and leaves. Valentin tells Nina that Anna uncovered some ancient history. Something that happened at the WSB, something sordid that doesn’t reflect well on either of them. Nina says whenever she sees them together, he says it won’t happen again. She tells him that she can’t have another man lie and cheat on her again. Valentin says he’ll tell her about it, but she won’t like it any more than Anna did.

Ned tells Olivia-F that marriage says to the world that they have a bond deeper than just living together or saying “I love you.” It means stability, and partnership for the rest of their lives; romance that will last until their dying breath. Olivia says he’s wanted that before, but it didn’t last. She wonders how he can have faith in it. He says that he knows where he made mistakes, and why they didn’t last. He tells Olivia that they can have a great life together. Olivia says she wants the life, but some document hanging over her head. She asks why what they have isn’t enough.

Jordan asks Curtis what he thinks she wants in a man. He tells her that she thought she wanted Andre, while he was a reminder of the mistakes she made. She says she’s not punishing him for either of their past mistakes. She tells him that he’d be a great asset to the force. He appreciates her renewed faith in him, but he went by Jason’s place, and when he told Jason that he might be joining the force, Jason reminded him of how well they worked together. He likes working without the restraint of rules and wants to continue being a P.I.

Laura explains to Tracy that she and Luke once lived all over the world, and one of those places they lived was Turkey. She asks if Tracy wants her to make the call. Tracy asks if Laura wants to shake her down like Ava and Larry, who think she’s a personal ATM, and tells Laura about Larry’s proposition. She says her father wouldn’t approve giving a finder’s fee to a ne’er-do-well loser, so she’s doing it herself.

Ava tells Lucy that’s not her final offer. She shows Lucy a small sculpture, and explains that it’s extremely valuable. Lucy says antiquities are dicey and a gamble. Ava says money and the sculpture for Morgan’s pills.

Jordan tells Curtis to watch his step. He says if by some miracle they come together, at least they won’t get nailed for fraternizing.

When Laura gets off the phone, she tells Tracy about the painting the auction house pulled. Tracy says that’s it, and Larry wasn’t lying for once in his life. Laura tells her about the painting, and that the seller was to receive $20 million for it, but it was returned to the seller because they weren’t the last listed owner. Which makes perfect sense – not. I would think the auction house might have called the authorities, as the painting could have been stolen. Tracy says has to get the painting.

Olivia-F says it ain’t broke, why fix it? Ned asks her to believe marriage can make it even better, but she has to believe in herself and love. Olivia says she believes in love, but not marriage. He says sorry, but being together like this isn’t enough for him.

Nathan tells Dante that he can fly out on weekends to see Maxie. Dante thinks that’s a bit much. Nathan says it’s either that or missing her for three months. Dante asks if they talked about how it will affect their relationship. Nathan says it didn’t seem fair to put more pressure on her, since Nina fired her. These scenes are absolutely unnecessary filler material, telling us nothing except that Maxie went to Oregon. Even Nathan and Dante look like they wanted to be somewhere else.

Valentin tells Nina about how Anna claimed she wanted to be with him, seduced him, got what she wanted, and turned it over to the DVX. Nina asks why she’s saying that he’s the criminal, and he says getting the information made him a traitor. Nina says he’s not a traitor, and please don’t say he protected Anna. Valentin says he ran, changing his identity every now and then. It was his own fault for letting her manipulate him. Nina says it’s not his fault. He was alone and needed someone, and Anna took advantage of it. Valentin says that Anna doesn’t remember, and he doesn’t think that she’s lying.

Anna comes to the hospital, but the doctor she wants to see isn’t there. She runs into Griff. She says that Valentin told her about something that happened between them years ago. She tells him that the memory was obviously vivid to him. She’d hurt him unforgivably, but she remembers nothing. Griff asks if Valentin could be lying.

Jordan says would take an act of God to bring her and Curtis together. It would have to start raining butterflies. They flirt. They move in for a kiss.

Laura tells Tracy that the painting is in a monastery. Tracy thinks that she should see them in person, but Laura says that the area is impoverished and rural. She’ll need a guide and a translator, and how will she know guide is trustworthy? She would also need to speak the language just to get around. Tracy says that Laura is coming with her.

Nathan tells Dante that maybe it won’t be so bad. He’ll work hard, see Maxie on weekends, and it will be over before he knows it. Dante says it’s a plan, but Nathan says Maxie never goes according to plan. Zzzzz… Unless Perks (where they are) blows up, these scenes were worthless.

Nina wonders if Anna is manipulating Valentin again. He says so much of his life was wasted thinking about her until he met Nina. She and Charlotte are his life now, and he wants nothing to put that in jeopardy. He’s through with Anna’s games. Nina says if he wants to look into it further, they can do it together. She wants to know his secrets. She’ll never use them against him, and keep them safe. She’ll never betray him. They kiss.

Griff wonders if Valentin is either lying or delusional. Anna says that he lived it, and it devastated him. Griff asks if he could have her confused with someone else. She says omg, she thinks she knows what might have happened. She needs to make a trip.

Lucy looks up the sculpture and says it’s extremely valuable. Ava says that’s what she’s been telling her, and just take the deal. Lucy waves the pills around, and sets them on the bar. Unobtrusive she’s not.

Ned tells Olivia-F that there’s no point in continuing if he’s not the right person for her. They don’t look at the relationship the same way, and she’s not invested. She asks if he’s breaking up with her.

Some armed, masked men come in and tell everyone not to move. We focus on the ring Ned was about to give to Olivia-F, and then the sculpture and bottle of pills on the bar.

Tomorrow, one of the gunmen threatens to kill Ava, Franco brings Nina a gift, and Jason talks to Sam about Jake.

I hate to admit it, but I’m not a huge Oprah fan. I liked her early on, but thought she became a bit full of herself. I also think she’s one of those whichever way the wind is blowing people, who will drop their own beliefs in a heartbeat if they think it will hurt their popularity. That being said, she does come out with some gems.

My philosophy is that not only are you responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.

Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not.

Every stumble is not a fall, and every fall does not mean failure.

Turn your wounds into wisdom.

Whatever has happened to you in your past has no power over this present moment, because life is now.

My idea of heaven is a great big baked potato and someone to share it with.

Oprah Winfrey

I have no clue why that last part ended up with a box around it. One of life’s great mysteries…


March 28, 2017 – Anna’s Truth is Revealed, Alex is Back in Maxine, the Wives Return from Hong Kong & Thoughts


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Obrecht gives Anna a folder containing everything she wanted to know about Valentin, but was afraid to ask.

Ned asks if Tracy is okay. He just told her that Michael might be costing her money, and she didn’t react. She says everything is fine, but she has to go. He wonders why she’s being purposely vague. He asks if she’s hiding something, and says don’t tell him she’s meeting with Larry.

Alexis hears something and thinks it’s Julian. She opens the door, but there’s nothing and no one there. She definitely dipped into that vodka. About three fourths is gone. She says if Julian is still alive, here’s his chance to stop her from drinking. She pours another, and says that’s what she thought. There’s a knock at the door.

Sonny asks if Lucy can wait. She says she doesn’t mean to interrupt, but she has to speak with both of them. It’s about their son. She says she’s gone back and forth about it, but has finally decided. Ava comes dashing in, saying that she wants to talk to Sonny about Avery’s education, even though she’s like two years old. Lucy says they were discussing their son. Ava goes on about Michael, and how she knows he hasn’t been able to contribute as much to the Nurses Ball. She says the Jerome Gallery is willing to make up the difference. Sonny tells Lucy she can count on him anytime, just not right now. (Well, that isn’t any time then, is it Sonny?) Ava tells Sonny that they can talk another day, and she’ll use this time to talk to Lucy. Ava and Lucy leave, and Carly is like, what was that?

Ned tells Tracy that the last time she met Larry, she ended up with worms in her brain. She reminds Ned that Larry said what he has to talk about is connected to her father, but Ned says that Larry knows that’s her Achilles’s heel, and he’s planning another con. She says on the outside chance it’s not a con, she has to find out. He says he hopes she’s prepared to be taken for a ride.

At least Alexis is smart enough to put the bottle in the cupboard this time. It’s Valentin. He asks if he can come in, and she wonders what happens if she says no. He tells her that would be rude, and she says they can’t have that. He asks for a drink, but she says that would indicate that she wants him to stay. He asks if she prefers to drink alone.

Obrecht tells Anna about Valetin sending messages to an encrypted account, and makes her swear not to use the information to hunt down Britt. She gives Anna the folder, saying she’s glad that Anna is as flawed and imperfect as the rest of them. Anna tells her that she can go now, and Obrecht says, you’re welcome. Yeah, really.

Tracy goes to Larry’s room, but decides Ned is right. Larry answers and she tells him she’s leaving. He says that he swiped her company credit card by mistake, and she’s paying for the room. He tells her if she’s not interested, he’ll go, but it’s a matter of the utmost importance to her family.

Ned is picking Olivia-F up for the movies, but she’s running late. He asks if she’s okay, and she says no. She tells him she has a proposal, but not that kind. He’s been more a father to Leo than Julian, and she thinks he should make it official and legally become Leo’s father. Ned says he can’t do that.

Alexis asks why Valentin is there. He gives her his condolences for her husband’s death. He says he had personal matters to deal with, but now he wants to make good on a promise – the keys to the Cassadine estate.

Anna shows Andre an email to her from Faison. She doesn’t understand why it the order to kill Valentin was issued in her name, but gets why it happened. He was to be taken out because of classified information falling into the wrong hands. The bureau was compromised, and agents were killed. Andre asks if Valentin was a double-agent. Anna says she doesn’t know, but the information wasn’t turned over by him – it was her.

Tracy tells Larry to start talking, and how is this connected to her family? He says Turkey, referring to the country. He’d been hopping across Europe, and his companion wanted to visit auction house in Turkey. One particular painting caught his eye. Another piece of the artist’s work had been appraised at $20 million, but he found out the painting belonged to someone else, and the house had no right to broker it. Imagine his surprise when he found out the owner was J.L. Holt, an alias of her father’s.

Ava says she’ll donate whatever Lucy needs. Lucy says they need money for everything, since one of their regular donors isn’t liquid. Ava says okay, and also wants Lucy’s silence. She writes a figure down, and Lucy says, wow, so cute, but they need another zero. She says it is for a worthy cause, showing Ava the bottle in her purse.

Sonny asks if Carly really wants to do this now with all the interruptions. She says he told her they haven’t had a real marriage in a long time. She doesn’t know when, or if, she can move past Nelle. He says he can’t keep doing the back and forth. She asks what he’s saying, and he tells her that if she’s not going to give them a chance, they’re done.

Laura tells Lulu that the Corrinthos family has no use for Nelle, but she thinks that Nelle has feelings for Michael. Nelle could be their way to outmaneuver Valentin.

Anna tells Andre that Valentin was questioned, and claimed he was tasked with a special assignment, and that Anna had requested the information that was leaked. He disappeared soon afterward, and the bureau thought it was his attempt to shift blame. Andre says everyone knows she wouldn’t sell out the bureau, but Anna says she would.

Valentin says Charlotte could use some relatives, and is about Danny’s age. Alexis thinks he’s trying to show he’s a good daddy, and maybe get some shared custody strategy from Diane. He says he had no siblings growing up, and wants things to be different for Charlotte. Alexis says that Charlotte has a sibling, Rocco, and he should start there. He takes out the vodka, opens the bottle, and tosses the cap to her, putting the bottle down. He leaves, and she takes her glass back out. There’s another knock at the door. Alexis doesn’t bother hiding anything, thinking it’s Valentin again, but it’s Julian.

Tracy tells Larry that she remembers her father running off to lead a different life for a couple of years. Larry says he had exquisite taste in art and always knew the value ahead of time. He informed the house that he knew the owner. They had been trying to track him down, and assumed he was dead. Larry says that the painting belongs to Edward’s heirs, and it could be returned for quid pro quo. He says the painting is worth $20 million, and they could split it. Tracy balks at paying $10 million for a painting her family already owns. He says without his knowledge, she has little to go on. Tracy says Ned told her he’d try to con her again, and she’s not playing. As she’s walking away, he tells her to think about what her father would want.

Ned asks Olivia-F what they’re doing. They’ve been dating off and on for three years, and he helped raise Leo. He’s not good enough to marry, but she wants him to be Leo’s father. Olivia tells him to look around. Everyone’s marriages are falling apart. It’s like a marriage license is a guarantee of breaking up.

Andre says that Anna’s record speaks for itself, and Anna tells him that it’s been strategically edited. She graduated with high marks got a plum assignment. She was immature and arrogant, and thought she was smarter than the system. If the DVX would pay for information, why not accept it? If she was going to risk her life, she deserved compensation. She thought she was worldly, but she was naïve. That’s how she talked herself into being a double-agent. People died, and she had to go underground, and couldn’t even raise her own child. Andre says that doesn’t sound like her, but she says that he’s wrong. It’s not who she is today, but it was then. Andre says she judges herself too harshly, and wonders if Valentin is lying. She says maybe they were both lied to.

Julian says he had the feeling Alexis might be drinking again, and came to stop her from making a mistake. She says no, and closes the door, but now he’s inside. Everywhere she turns, she sees him. She says too late, she’s been drinking all day, but he says it’s never too late to stop. She tells him that he has no right telling her what to do. She says that she read his letter, and he says protecting her. Alexis says had Julian told her the truth, maybe she wouldn’t be drinking in the first place.

Ava tells Lucy that she doesn’t have that kind of money. Lucy says maybe Sonny and Carly will come forward. Ava asks for a couple of days, but Lucy says her budget has to be ready in the morning, so she needs the cash by tonight. If not, they have a problem.

Sonny says that he and Carly are in a strange limbo. She asks who put them there? He says she keeps dangling forgiveness in front of him and taking it away, and asks if their marriage is worth fighting for. She says he’s doing it again. He lied, and now he’s giving her an ultimatum because she’s not forgiving him. If he wants to end the marriage, fine with her.

Tracy says she’s going to find the painting herself. She sees Ava and Lucy talking. Lucy tells Ava that as soon as the funds are confirmed, the pills are hers. Lucy leaves, and Ava wonders where she’s getting that kind of money on such short notice. Tracy joins her at the bar, saying she needs help about a painting.

Carly tells Sonny that if they’d had a marriage, he would have warned her about Nelle. He demands honesty, but his first instinct is to lie, and she refuses to be shut out again. He says she’s always known his business is about secrets. She says that she tried to trust him, but he lets things come to boiling point and it explodes. He tells her that he’s let her in more than anyone, and wonders why she focuses on what he can’t do.

Lulu tells Laura that Dante talked to Michael about Nelle, and he seemed furious with her. Really? I didn’t take him as being “furious.” Laura says it didn’t seem that way to her, and if Nelle wants to be back in his good graces, she should endear herself to Lulu and Dante. Lulu asks if Laura thinks that Nelle wouldn’t alienate her.

Anna goes to Valentin and says that he had the information that the DVX wanted, and he tells her that he was interrogated about it. She thinks they’ve both been played

Alexis tells Julian that she spent months trying to understand who he’d become, and she couldn’t process it because he kept her in the dark.  She lost her husband, her law license, and her self-respect because he didn’t give her the facts. Julian says he did what he did to keep her safe. She says he’s not really there and she’s just imagining it; what he’s saying is what she wants to hear. He says she’s right. He’s in her mind, which means it’s not him, but her, telling herself to put the bottle down.

Julian says he’s a manifestation of what she already knows. She needs to get back to AA. What would her daughters say, and what about getting her license back? She has too much to live for. She says not with him, and he tells her a little piece of him will always be in her heart. She’s about to kiss him, when he disappears. She pours out the rest of Rolo’s vodka. Is Rolo’s really a thing, or are they making that up? It sounds like something that’s $4.99 a gallon.

Ned tells Olivia-F that they’re going to The Floating Rib tonight, and he’s proposing again. However she responds is what he’ll accept as her final answer.

Ava asks Tracy what she needs. Tracy says painting by Renaissance master that was owned by her family, but left in Turkey. If anyone can help find it, it’s Ava. Ava says she can, for a price.

Carly says she has to forgive Sonny and accept his lies, and he gets to decide what she can know; it’s marriage on his terms. He says she’s twisting it. He’d give his life for her, but he’s never pretending to be what he isn’t, and if who he is doesn’t work for her, there’s the door. Cold Sonny. Can’t blame him though. She says this is her walking out, and she’s not coming back. She leaves, and Sonny smashes a glass against the wall.

Laura doesn’t think they can use Nelle to get visitation, and Lulu asks how is she an advantage then? Laura isn’t sure yet, but tells Lulu to make friends with her. When Valentin tries to do something to sabotage them (like he has to; they do well enough on their own), Nelle will be a witness. Lulu wonders if she’ll have an ally or a spy.

Valentin says one of them got played, but it wasn’t Anna. He says he was a rising star, and she dragged him down. She persuaded him to give her information for what she said was a special assignment. She says there must have been a third party, but Valentin says she asked him herself – after they slept together. DUN-DUN-DUNN!

Tomorrow, Amy 2.0 gets a chance to shine, Nina talks to Griff, and Ava tells Tracy she’s got it.

If Loving You is Wrong

Since my internet connection is down, I’m just capsulizing this. Long sad story and day. Maybe you’ll like it better. Maybe I will. I just want my internet back. <SOB!>

Kelly is questioned about Ramsey at the station. The questions seem a bit intrusive and I’m wondering about the officer. Okay, seriously now, he just asked why she wasn’t dating him. That doesn’t sound like the kind of question they’d be asking. It would be great if they’d tell us how he died. He also gives her the report on Travis to give to her lawyer.

Kelly sees Travis at the station and acts ignorant. He asks her a bunch of ridiculous questions, and after acting like he doesn’t know why he was called there, says that they want to talk to him about Ramsey. He’s so stupid, he grabs Kelly, and then tells the officer that she’s a liar. Some girl joins him, and claims that Kelly sends text messages to him, and he shows them his phone. He makes up a bunch of other lies, saying that Kelly is a jealous, scorned ex. The supposed new girlfriend says they’ve been praying for her, and Kelly suggests they pray for Travis. I don’t think the officer is buying all this, but he tells them to stay away from each other. Kelly talks to Esperanza while she’s there. Essie is concerned that Kelly will be a suspect.

Andrew is nowhere to be found, and Steven questions Eddie. Steven acts like he’s all down with Eddie. Eddie tells him about Lushion being FBI, but Steven gives him a file saying Lushion is too much of an idiot to be FBI. Eddie insists that Steven knows nothing, and says he’ll call the FBI himself. Like the FBI will just give up this information to a stranger.

Steven tells Lushion that they just need one more piece – I assume he means evidence—and everything will be cleared up.

The hospital is keeping Alex and Randal’s baby for the night. He had water in his lungs, and they want to make sure it doesn’t turn into pneumonia. Someone from child welfare asks them what happened. Randal tells her that Alex’s mother dropped him in the lake, and Alex tries to explain. Randal keeps putting in his two cents, and Alex keeps telling him to shut up. He says that right about now, her parents should be burning in hell, which is enough for the child welfare woman to say they’re keeping him. When she’s gone, Alex tells Randal that she wishes they’d killed him. He says unfortunately for her, they didn’t.

The officer questions Travis, and asks if he’ll do a DNA test. He agrees, but then prattles on about how Kelly won’t leave him alone, and even tells her son that Travis is his father. I have the feeling the officer isn’t picking up what Travis is putting down. He asks more questions about Ramsey, and tells Travis not to leave town and to stay away from Kelly. Before he leaves, Travis asks to pray for the officer. As he’s praying, the officer looks skeptical, even though he claims he was feelin’ it afterward. Travis invites him to the church, and he says he’ll be by. When Travis is gone, he says he’ll be by with some handcuffs. Yep, I’m right.

Lushion visits Pete. He gives Pete a gun, saying that Pete didn’t get it from him. They talk about Joey. He tells Pete to trust him; they’re all going down.

Out of the loop Randal can’t find his mother. Alex comes home and he grabs her. Marcie pops out, and Alex says Randal is just leaving, and so is Marcie. Marcie asks what happened, and Alex tells her to get out. Marcie says she’s not leaving until her man gets there with her car. Alex asks who her man is, and Marcie tells her that it’s Brad. Alex says she’s not in the mood, and Marcie antagonizes her. They tussle, and Brad walks in and separates them, taking Marcie out. Marcie says he’s hers now. Like any guy except Lushion is a prize on this show.

Kelly makes an appointment with her lawyer. Her boss tells her to call her son’s school. He left his science project in the car and Kelly asks if she can drop it off. Her boss says that’s fine, and tells Kelly what a great employee she is.

Not a big shock. Travis is waiting in Kelly’s car.

Next time, Kelly struggles with Travis, Lushion accuses Eddie of killing Andrew, and Louise tells Randal to let it go.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

LisaR questions Dorit as to whether her dinner party guests were crammed in the bathroom doing coke. Dorit is appalled. Lisa says she was sitting at the table by herself, and we flash back to her sitting at a table for maybe eight, empty, except for her and PK talking. I can think of several reasons why they might have left her sitting alone, not one of them involving drugs. Dorit says, yes, her home is a coke den, and Lisa says she alluded to her being a Xanax addict, and all this time she’d kept her thoughts to herself. Lisa says some more stupid stuff, and gets up from the table.

LisaV thinks it’s time to leave, and Eileen agrees this isn’t getting anywhere. On the way home, Dorit gets upset because she has small children at home. LisaV says she’s been there, and we flash back to – OH GOD NO – the Munchhausen conversation. We will never be rid of that. Never.

The next morning, LisaR calls LisaV to say thanks for the trip. She wishes she could stay for the shopping, but she has to get to Chicago. LisaV isn’t too happy about how she attacked Dorit, but invites her to an upcoming get together. LisaR has no regrets. She says she “goes there” with people who aren’t listening or say untruths. Says the person who didn’t remember telling Eden that Kim was not sober and close to death.

Eileen frets about the altercation with Erika, but it’s time for shopping, so she has to set that aside. Dorit says shopping will always take away the pain. They go to rich people stores that sell beautiful stuff. Erika points out that she’s a size six at home, but an extra-large in Hong Kong. Erika’s sunglasses are everything. Rich people wear the best sunglasses.

Eden buys Erika a friendship ring. OMG, ERIKA’S EARRINGS!!! They’re hoops, but they’re unusual and the color is a metallic rose gold.

LisaV takes the ladies to the ASPCA, where they’ve brought some dogs that were rescued from the meat trade. The whole thing is just so sad. But on the happy end, they visit the saved pups. Lisa talks about the cause in her interview. Eileen has a moment with one of the dogs. She asks about adoption, but it’s complicated and lengthy. They go to a room where some of the dogs can wander around and mingle. The dogs play bitey-face with each other. In her interview, Lisa says if you’re a dog lover, you can’t ignore this situation. I agree. She says that this is what the trip was for, and hopes the women understand.

Erika meets Eileen for lunch. She wants to apologize. Eileen explains that The Young and the Restless has been running late, but Erika will be getting a script soon. In her interview, Eileen says it’s awkward, since both of them are pretending nothing happened. Kyle joins them. They talk about the Hong Kong dinner, and Erika doesn’t think Dorit is sincere. She keeps making it seem like Dorit and PK said she flashed him on purpose, but that’s not what happened. She’s hoping for an apology at LisaV’s. Suddenly, she apologizes to Eileen for her meltdown. Eileen is cool about it. Erika says she was exhausted from taking the high road, and for the first time, I can identify with her.

Boy George is starting his tour, and Dorit is glad she’s not the one traveling. She talks to PK about what happened in Hong Kong. She doesn’t know where to go with LisaR. PK says LisaR is schizophrenic and dangerous. Dorit tells him about Erika’s “dramatic hoo-ha,” referring to her dinner dramatics, not Pantygate. He wonders about seeing them at LisaV’s gathering.

Commercial break with important information. Below Deck: Mediterranean begins again on Tuesday, May 2nd. They’ll be traveling to Croatia.

Erika comes to the Y&R studio. Eileen meets her in the dressing room. She’s excited and nervous. Eileen tells her that it used to be her dressing room, and her son practically grew up there.

Kyle works on the show she’s producing. Another producer goes over the upcoming scene with her. She’s liking being on the other side of the camera, and wants to earn her title. Mauricio visits Kyle on the set. In her interview, she talks about their crazy schedule, but they’re navigating it together.

Erika is playing Farrah Dubois, a real estate agent. She and Eileen’s character, Ashley, literally run into each other and have an exchange. They meet later and Farrah tries to talk Ashley into buying a house. Eileen thinks Erika should be on the show again.

Kevin Lee sets up Lisa’s party. She talks about the fist fights arguments in Hong Kong. In her interview, she says that she thought LisaR’s intentions were good at first, but now she’s not so sure. She doesn’t want to backtrack, but feels the need to point out that some of the things LisaR says are not acceptable. Ponies! LisaV introduces Kevin to the pony guy, and Kevin asks if he’s straight. Yes, he is. Oh well. Lisa leaves to get ready while the ponies get their hair done.

The rules are to wear pink, diamonds, and wedges. Kyle has tried to hem her jumpsuit on the fly, and thinks it’s crooked. That sounds like something I would do. Take the scissors to a pair of pants five minutes before I’m wearing them.

Erika’s glam squad is shocked at the wedges rule (frankly, so am I), and Erika says they don’t do wedges. So instead they come up with a pink wig for her to wear.

LisaV tends to the last-minute details. She says Kevin always interprets what she wants, and then some, even though she never understands a word he says. The tent is gorgeous, all pink and flowing, with a dreamlike room underneath it. Lots of crystal and pink happening.

Dorit tells PK she thinks it’s going to be awkward. LisaR tells Eileen that she’s an easy target. Eileen thinks there will be spirited conversation this evening. Is that what we’re calling it now?

Harrison! Everything is even more beautiful all lit up, and everyone is wearing something fabulous. Dorit questions LisaV as to whether she’s ever said that LisaR has a drug problem. LisaV says of course not, and PK seconds that. Dorit finds LisaR unpredictable, and doesn’t know what she’s capable of.

Next time, lots of glitter, some dancing, PK insults Erika, and Dorit tells LisaR to take a step back.

🔫 Imposters is so good! Tonight, Maddie let Tim know that she knows he’s working for the FBI. (There’s a lot of that going around.) But, she propositioned him gave him a proposition. I love this show because it’s full of surprises.

👠 Not so much Little Women: LA. This week, we’re back to the Briana/Matt question. Briana insists she’s moving forward, yet she never seems to. We also find out that after she attended the Dancing with the Stars episode where Terra was eliminated (jinx!), she put the moves on Terra’s manager or publicist or whatever. Christy has had her neck surgery, so nothing new in the infirmary that is her household.


March 27, 2017 – Julian Won’t Go Away & a Vanderpump Wedding with a Side of Divorce


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

At the MetroCourt, Scotty tells Ava that he’s going to save her ass.

Laura interrupts Sonny and Carly’s argument at Perks, but Carly says they’re done. It doesn’t matter. Laura stopped respecting boundaries ages ago.

Elizabeth shows Jason the timeline of Jake’s life in the drawings. She tells him that she and Franco wanted to see how he perceived himself. Jason thinks it looks normal.

Sam calls Alexis about helping with Scout so she can take a nap. Alexis says she doesn’t know if she can make it today. She says she keeps playing the Julian stuff over in her head. Sam suggests coming over to talk; she doesn’t want Alexis to be alone. Alexis tells her not to worry, and hints that she’s going to a meeting, as she opens a bottle of vodka. Probably Joe’s Vodka. Sam says the other girls told her that Alexis wasn’t doing very well, but she was handling it – one day at a time. There’s a knock at Sam’s door, and Sam tells Alexis to come by after her meeting. Alexis’s meeting is with a drink and Julian’s letter.

Elizabeth shows Jason the scarecrow in the book, and asks if he doesn’t think it’s worth exploring. He says he talked to the psychologist at the school, and Jake is doing fine. Why reopen an old wound? Franco says it’s just below the surface, waiting for the right trigger.

It’s Carly at Sam’s door. She was looking for Jason, but Sam invites her in to talk. Carly thinks her marriage is over.

Laura apologizes to Sonny. She asks if he wants to talk about it, but he says no thanks. He says he spoke to Dante about what happened at the custody hearing, and Diane is usually better than that. Laura says that Valentin outmaneuvered them. Sonny says he offered Dante help, but Dante turned him down. Laura says well, he is a cop, but he’s also proud, and she jokingly wonders where he gets it. Laura says she might take Sonny up on the offer though.

Scotty tells Ava to finish her drink before Lucy shows up. She asks if Lucy agreed to give him the pill bottle, and he says that’s the plan. Ava doesn’t want Sonny to be more suspicious than he already is. Scotty tells Ava that he has a radical plan to blindside Lucy. As he hustles Ava out of the restaurant, Lucy steps out of the elevator.

Franco says that Jason might not want to talk, but they have to. Jake has something he’s hiding. Elizabeth tells Jason to look at the drawings. She explains about the blank space that the scarecrow now resides in, and says that Jake claims he didn’t draw it. Franco says he knows it’s Jake’s drawing, and Jason asks if this was Franco’s idea. Elizabeth tells him about Jake saying that Sam is cursed. Jason wonders what he knows, and Elizabeth says that’s what she’s trying to find out. She thinks what happened to Sam triggered him, but Jason thinks that Franco is behind it.

Sonny tells Laura to name it. Laura tells him about the six months of limited visitation, after which Lulu can pursue custody. Sonny doesn’t think she’ll have a problem, but Laura says that Valentin is a master manipulator, and she needs to find his vulnerabilities. Sonny says he’ll get someone on it. Laura tells him about Nelle being Valentin’s new nanny.

Carly asks if Sam thinks she’s wrong to still feel betrayed. She says she can’t just forget because Sonny wants her to. Sam says no, and hers is the only opinion that counts. She asks what Carly wants. Carly says that she wants Morgan to be alive, and her life the way it used to be. She says her life was shattered, but she doesn’t think Sonny wants to put it back together.

Scotty tells Ava good-by, and she tells him to enjoy his lunch. Scotty sits down with Lucy, and tells her that she and Ava have a lot in common; they’re both protective of their children. Lucy points out that she doesn’t date her daughter’s boyfriends. She accuses Scotty of doing Ava’s dirty work.

Alexis kicks back with the letter and some booze. We hear Julian’s voice saying she’s better off without him and how much he loves her. Julian appears, and says he’d do it all over again. He’d do anything for her.

Lucy says there’s always an agenda with Scotty. He wants her to hear him out. She says Ava has him wrapped around her little finger, and Lucy knows he wants the pills. He says he’s not denying anything, and she’s shocked. He says he doesn’t like the little finger business, but she’s right on the money with everything else.

Alexis reaches for Julian. There’s’ a knock at the door, and he disappears. Alexis stupidly hides the bottle behind a throw pillow. It’s Ava. She says it’s about Julian. She asks if Alexis knows that Jordan called off the search, and Alexis says it feels like he’s still there. Ava says for her too; he comes to her in her dreams and she can’t accept he’s gone. She says they haven’t found his body because it’s not there to find. She wants to pool their resources to try and find him, and in the meantime, she finds the bottle. Worst. Hiding. Place. Ever.

Sonny is surprised that Valentin hired Nelle. He didn’t think she’d stay in Port Charles. Laura says they don’t know Nelle like he and Carly do. He says Nelle is bad news, and Laura shouldn’t have anything to do with her.

Carly tells Sam that it takes a lot for Sonny to apologize, and he expects it to be accepted because he’s arrogant as hell. Sam says none of the other women Sonny has ever been with are the answer. She’s right; he’s arrogant and Sam doesn’t get it. She says women see the dimples, but underneath, he’s complicated, even scary. She doesn’t think there’s another woman strong enough for him. Carly asks what if she’s not strong enough anymore?

Jason says Franco is using their son to play Elizabeth. Elizabeth is like, thanks a lot for thinking I’m an idiot, and tells him that her eyes are open. She realizes that he has reasons to mistrust Franco. Jason says he despises Franco. He tortured Sam, and Jason doesn’t care about the tumor that was removed; he is who he is. Elizabeth tells him that he’s ignoring medical fact, and Franco is there because she trusts him. Jason says the boys will pay the price, but Elizabeth says Franco has no reason to hurt them. Jason says that Franco wants to play the hero. Franco says that Jake has a problem that needs to be confronted, but Jason says not by Franco. Elizabeth says Franco is a part of their lives and household, and get used to it; he’s not going anywhere. Jason says maybe Jake should then. If Franco is going to be spending so much time there, maybe Jake shouldn’t.

Elizabeth asks if Jason is going to try to take her son if she doesn’t fall in line. He says if she chooses to have a relationship with Franco, that’s her business, but Jake was doing fine until Franco came along. If he’s the cause of Jake’s problems, Jason is going to handle it.

Scotty tells Lucy that it’s time to give the pills back. Lucy asks why she should, and he tells her think of the children. Lucy says she was trying to shield Kiki, but maybe she should know the truth. She says that Kiki and Ava have a relationship based on deception. Scotty asks if Serena would see it that way. She doesn’t like drama, and that’s probably why she hasn’t visited. She asks if he’s threatening to tell on her, and he says if she doesn’t like the prospect, maybe she should reconsider.

Ava says she’ll take Alexis to a meeting, and Alexis tells her to mind her own business. Ava says that Julian tried to help her, and this is how she repays him, with a bottle of vodka. Alexis tells Ava to deal with Julian’s death in her own way and so will she.

Sonny says Nelle’s interest always come first – to hurt Carly and her family. Laura asks if that includes Michael. She saw them talking, and when she asked Michael about Nelle, he said they used to be friends. She had the feeling something was left unfinished. Sonny says Michael gives Nelle more compassion than she deserves, but his family always comes first. Nelle used Morgan’s death to get at them, and Michael will never forgive her for that.

Carly tells Sam that she and Sonny always come back to each other, but maybe they can’t find their way this time. She says that Bobbie thinks she and Sonny have reached tipping point. She likes Sonny, just not with Carly. Sam can’t blame her. Carly wishes things would go back to the way they used to be. but it feels wrong.  As many times as they say they’ll never do it again, they do. Sam says it’s the marriage they have, but it doesn’t have to be the marriage she’s stuck with. A marriage is done when you’re done growing. Carly says maybe they’ve reached that point. Sam tells her that she’s admired them for years because their love is so strong. Carly needs to ask herself if she’s sure that they don’t have it in them to grow some more.

Elizabeth wonders why Jason thinks Franco is the problem. Franco tells her to look at the bright side; they didn’t get in a fist fight, and that represents progress. Elizabeth says it was disastrous, and thinks that Jason is on the verge of threatening war. Franco says that Jason loves Jake more than he hates Franco. He knows something is wrong. He’s never going to be their cheerleader, but so what? Elizabeth says for Jake’s sake, she needs him on board.

Scotty says that Sonny and Carly should go on with their lives. Lucy doesn’t believe he’s being moved by compassion. He says he knows her, and she always does the right thing so Serena will be proud of her. Lucy thinks there’s more than meets the eye. She says she’s a stand-up friend, and one friend who’s never hurt her is Sonny. She grabs a piece of bread, says “Ta!” and leaves.

Laura appreciates Sonny being candid and will take it to heart. She’ll do whatever it takes to protect her family. Sonny suggests a backup plan, since Nelle is a disaster waiting to happen. Laura says he’s still standing. Sonny says he doesn’t know if he has it in him to try again with Carly He loves her, but it’s like what they had isn’t there anymore. Laura tells him to dig deeper to find it, and make sure there’s nothing left before walking away.

Ava says she’s not going to let Alexis use Julian to start boozing it up again. Alexis says what she does with her life is none of Ava’s business. Ava asks her what life? and Alexis tells her to get out. Ava says she’s glad Julian’s not there to see what happened with his sacrifice; she’s not longer worth saving. Alexis guzzles some vodka, and Ava walks out.

Laura makes a phone call. She says that she thinks she knows how Nelle might prove useful.

Carly walks into Sonny’s house. He says he doesn’t like the way they left things, and she says she didn’t either. Sonny’s phone rings. It’s a real landline with a curly phone cord. He says he didn’t want to be interrupted, and then says send her up. I guess it’s literally the house phone.

Jason goes back home, and Sam tells him that he just missed Carly. Sam is worried about her. Jason says he was dropping Jake’s glove off. Something is wrong with Jake, and he doesn’t know what to do.

Franco tells Elizabeth that Jason will have to deal with Jake’s problem, whether he likes it or not. She’s afraid he’ll demand a new custody arrangement. She feels like she has to play along, and Franco asks what that means. Is she breaking up with him? She says no, but maybe they should hold off on him moving in for the time being. Franco says she’s gotta do what she’s gotta do, and she says that sorting things out with Jake is important. This isn’t what she wants, and Franco says, but it’s for the best. He tells her that if they’re doing this, they’d better get started, and leaves.

Alexis is passed out. Someone jiggles the door knob. She stumbles around and opens the door, thinking it’s Julian, but there’s no one there.

Ava comes back to the MetroCourt and sees Scotty sitting by himself. He says their business concluded early, and Lucy left, probably hungry. Ava asks if he got the pills, and he tells her to save the applause. There’s a problem.

Lucy is at Sonny’s door. He says that Max told him it’s something important. Lucy says she’s waited long enough and can’t wait another minute. She has the pill bottle in her hand.

Tomorrow, Tracy asks Ava for help, Valentin says he’s ready to make good on his promise to Alexis, and  Laura tells Lulu that Nelle could be the answer.

Vanderpump Rules

It’s wedding time! Harrison! Dog whose name I don’t know! Lisa takes her place at the podium, and the attendants begin to walk down the aisle. Butter and Gordo! Where’s Giggy? Omg, I love Katie’s vintage brooch bouquet so much. I’m coming very close to buying one for myself. They’re not as expensive as you might think on Etsy. In his interview, Tom says he knew Katie would look good, but didn’t know she’d look this good.

Lisa starts by saying she’s been married over thirty years, so she has some advice – run. She gives the couple a list of do’s and don’ts, including not texting while on tequila. Schwartz says his vows, at first pretending that he forgot them. He says he was resigned to being LA’s most ineligible bachelor until Katie came along. In her interview, Kristen talks about how obsessed he was with Katie. Schwartz says he can’t imagine not waking up next to her in the morning. He talks about having to tear the relationship down to rebuild it, and says he’s never loved her more. He gets all teary, and no surprise, Tom does too, wiping his eyes on poor Butter’s head. Or maybe it’s Gordo.

Katie talks about the love, laughter, and tears, and how they persevered. She can’t wait to spend her life with Schwartz. Jax insists he’s not crying, but he is. The rings are exchanged, and we flash back to the ring on a string. In her interview, Katie says this is the real deal – her happy ending. Lisa asks if they take each other for richer or richer. (Not a typo.) They say their “I do’s,” and Lisa pronounces them husband and wife. Katie says they’re married AF.

The reception begins. In her interview, Lisa says this group has a way of working things out that makes no sense to her, but makes sense to them. The Schwartzes arrive. In her interview, Stassi says everyone thought that she and Jax were the glue that held the group together, but it’s really Katie and Schwartz; she and Jax were just the glue everybody sniffed. Ha-ha! She cracks me up. Carter tells Kristen that he likes when she’s drunk and has wedding fever. In her interview, Kristen asks who doesn’t think about getting married when they’re at someone else’s wedding. That would be me. Dinner is served, and Stassi makes Lisa a plate, since she’s used to serving her. Giggy!

Lisa asks Tom about marrying Ariana. He wants to, but says he’s never made an attempt at proposing. Lisa says she was like Ariana when she was younger, not wanting to get married or have kids, but things change, and it was the best thing that she ever did. She talks to Tom about partnering up for a new restaurant. In his interview, Tom’s head explodes over Lisa thinking of him as a potential business partner.

Schwartz’s brother Billy takes the mic. Nothing to see here. Brother Bert thanks Jax and Tom for getting them to the wedding. Billy takes the mic again. Still nothing to see here. Tom talks about Schwartz rubbing him the wrong way – said no one ever. He goes on about how wonderful Schwartz is. Stassi talks about them taking care of her a million times, and reminds me of a couple I was friends with in my single days, who talked me down many a time. In her interview, Katie says the wedding wouldn’t have felt complete without Stassi.

Time to drink and dance. Jax and Brittany step away from the crowd. Jax says he doesn’t think things are going well for them anymore. Because he’s the biggest idiot on the planet. Next to Lulu on GH. He says he loves her as a person, and then tells her that he’s kidding, . Because he’s still the biggest idiot on the planet. In her interview, Brittany says he was thisclose to having his weenie fed to the chickens. He says a wedding is going to happen; he just doesn’t know when. In his interview, he says she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to him, and when the times comes, she’ll be the one. He wants her to know there’s light at the end of the tunnel, but IMO that’s debatable.

Lisa asks Katie when she’s having children. Good Lord, give her a minute. Scheana suggests that Ariana have a reception without actually getting married. At the bar, various guests toast to Katie and Schwartz. Tom tells Ariana about Lisa’s proposition. He says he’s been a bartender for ten years, and has always wanted to open his own place. He points out how happy and supportive Ken and Lisa are as a couple, and says he looks at Ariana the same way. In his interview, he says he’d love to be a dad someday. He tells Ariana not to worry, he’s not going to propose, but wonders if someday they’ll get married. In her interview, she says she loves him, but doesn’t know if marriage is something she wants. She’s not going to shoot him down yet though.

The cake is cut. Schwartz puts icing on Katie’s nose. Thank God they didn’t do that smushing the cake in each other’s faces thing. I hate that, and once saw a bride run to the bathroom in tears after the jackass she married did that to her. Although overall, it was the worst wedding I ever attended. Her father officiated, and forgot what state the wedding was in during his speech. That wouldn’t have been so bad, but looking back, I was sure it was a sign. The room was adjacent to a bar where there was a football game on TV, so every time the people at the bar made noise, we heard it. Because there was no music to drown it out. And it was a cash bar. Not even one “free” drink. And the wine was served in what I would call a juice glass, aka tiny. It was also the day after Christmas. I’ll stop now, since I’m getting the shakes just thinking about it. Scheana has barely seen Shay since the ceremony, and wonders what’s up. Lisa talks to Tom about Schwartz being “the face” of the new bar. She says he’d do a great job as a front man, and Tom could deal with what she does. She thinks they should call it Tom Tom, but doesn’t know if that will be a good idea when she’s sober. Schwartz joins them, and Lisa tells him about the new property, and how she and Ken want Tom to be involved, as well as for him to be the face.

Commercial break with important information. Southern Charm starts again next Monday, April 3.

Schwartz asks if Lisa is serious. He’s concerned that if it fails, it will be on them. In his interview, Tom says one whiff of responsibility and Schwartz runs. Lisa says almost the same thing, that he’s allergic to commitment. Since he already made a big one today, she says she’ll talk to him on Monday. Tom asks if Schwartz is busy in three months, and if not, why not open up a new bar with Lisa Vanderpump? Schwartz says he realizes that he’s over-thinking it, and Tom agrees.

Stassi asks if Ariana still thinks she’s annoying. In her interview, Stassi says she likes Ariana (why, I’m not sure), and it hurts her feelings when Ariana is mean to her. She asks Ariana if she’s closing herself off. In her interview, Ariana says she doesn’t have to be friends with Stassi. She tells Stassi that she’s doing the best that she can. She suddenly starts crying, saying she’s trying not to be a 30 year old bartender who’s doing nothing. Stassi says that’s not who she is, and that she shouldn’t feel sad about feeling sad. It’s okay to have emotions. Stassi tells her that nobody is great all the time, and you’re not a human being if you’re not sad sometimes. They manage to connect somewhat, and in her interview, Ariana has to admit that Stassi isn’t a monster.

More dancing! And Tom has another surprise. He’s brought his trumpet. Oh, yay, drunk trumpet playing. The sax player asks Tom not to play in his ear. Everyone is all happy and buzzed, and Shay finally shows up. Schwartz says that Jax and Tom are like family. He’d take a bullet for them. Maybe in the leg. Stassi wonders what it’s like to have someone love you that much. Katie says it’s amazing, and there’s someone out there for her. The Three Stooges Jax, Tom, and Schwartz talk about what great friends they are. Geez, without Kristen putting the boxing gloves on, weddings are pretty boring in La La Land. Kristen does announce that she’s not ovulating though.

Giggy and Harrison! Lisa signs the marriage certificate. Schwartz says it’s official now, and Lisa tells them, off you go. Katie says they’re very committed, and it would be way too easy to make a joke here. Lisa says thank God it’s over, and Ken gives her props for her officiating.

Three months later. Scheana gets together with Lisa at Villa Rosa. Scheana tells her that she’s found out some things about Shay recently. He goes MIA and doesn’t answer her calls. She says he hasn’t been at the apartment once in two weeks. Everything is not rainbows and sunshine like she’s been telling people. He’s with his parents, and Lisa says it’s been bullsh*t since she found out about Shay taking pills. In her interview, Lisa says she thinks Scheana knew in her gut that there was a problem, but didn’t want to admit it. Scheana tells Lisa that Shay has been taking Adderall for months. One of her friends had pulled her aside and let her know he’d been scoring pills, but saying he was just the middleman. She started checking his emails, and discovered that the bank account had been cleaned out. She says she can’t picture her life without him, but can’t picture it moving forward. Lisa asks if they connect at all, even in bed, and Scheana shakes her head. Lisa tells her that she’s young enough to start again. Scheana says they were talking about starting a family, but Lisa says you can’t start a family with someone who isn’t there. Scheana is going to meet with a lawyer because she’s done. She wants Shay to be able to look her in the eye and say he’s not doing drugs.

Scheana waits for Shay at the apartment. He asks what’s up, and she notices he’s gotten his ears pierced. She wants to know why he didn’t come home. He says that he wanted to figure some things out, not involving anyone else. He says he loves her, but she doesn’t listen, and now he got her attention. He wants to be happy, but can’t do it without her. She says the relationship isn’t good, and he says he’s been labeled a druggie, and no one treats him with respect. She asks if he’s on drugs, and he tells her no. He complains that she doesn’t treat him with respect either. She tells him that she talked to Lisa, and he says he has his own mother, and that Lisa should talk to her own kids. He says Scheana isn’t taking care of him the way she should, but she says he’s never home. He talks about the studio, and how productive things are there, and she wonders how they’re up all night without drugs. She asks about the bank account, and he insists he’s just buying music stuff. In her interview, she says she may never know the truth, but this isn’t the man she married. She tells him this really needs to be done, and she’s meeting with a lawyer. She says divorce isn’t easy, and wasn’t what she wanted. They both start crying, and she says he knows she’s right. He nods, and she tells him to get his stuff. In her interview, she says she’d planned on spending the rest of her life with him, growing old and having kids with him, and all she knows is that they’re done. Shay packs. The door closes behind him. This is really kind of sad.

Next time, the reunion, and the return of Lala. Godzilla with a cat eye.

🎉 And at another wedding on New Year’s Eve, 2010…


March 26, 2017 – A Happy Ending, an Unhappy Prisoner & a Thought or Two


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


 Once Upon a Time

The Evil Queen arrives at a village, looking for Snow White. She wants the villagers to see justice served, and tells the guards to gather them. Her father tells her that she should show mercy, but she says she came for a heart. She finds nothing but straw though. She says someone is going to tell her where Snow went. She tells them that Snow doesn’t love them; she does. Tinkerbell appears, and says that the Evil Queen doesn’t care about love. She was there when the queen threw her chance at love away. The Evil Queen asks Tinkerbell if she shouldn’t be sleeping in a tulip somewhere, and the fairy says she used pixie dust to show the queen her future and the man she should be with. The queen says nothing dictates what she should do, and Tinkerbell says pixie dust only shows the possibilities; the rest is up to her. The Evil Queen says she’s happy with how things are, but Tinkerbell says she believes she doesn’t deserve love. The Evil Queen says she’ll spare Snow’s life to show that she loves everyone. She tells Tinkerbell that she hopes she enjoyed the show of mercy, since it’s the last. I guess she doesn’t love them that much.

In Storybrooke, the Evil Queen tells Robin that Regina wants to keep her dark side a secret. He says he might have the solution, but she says it’s not New York. He belongs in the realm she created with her wish, but she wants him to steal something first.

They go to a graveyard. Robin asks what this is about. The Evil Queen tells him to stop asking questions and dig.

Snow and Henry look at Emma’s ring. Everyone is happy about the engagement. Henry asks how Hook proposed, but Emma says she didn’t give him a chance. She says that Gideon is still out there, and she has to deal with that. Regina and Zelena join them. Regina tells them the snake got loose, and if she shook off her mortal coil, there’s no telling what evil she might be up to.

Robin asks the Evil Queen if they can’t use magic. She says what fun would that be? Robin unearths a box. It has the shears in it. She tells him that they’re capable of setting someone free of their fate. She’s going to use them to finally separate herself from Regina, and then she can destroy her.

Hook sees Captain Nemo on the docks. The captain says, you can tell the ocean your secrets, but will she tell you hers? ♫ Hi-diddly dee! A pirate’s life for me! ♫ He didn’t sing that; it just popped into my head. It’s time for him to go back to The Nautilus, and he wonders what Hook is going to do with his life. Hook says now that he’s found the woman he wants to marry, his past has caught up to him. He doesn’t get a happy ending. Nemo asks who knows Hook’s secrets, and Hook says only him. Nemo tells him that he must tell Emma the truth or keep it to himself forever. He tells Hook to seek forgiveness, because whatever happened will always stay with him.

The Evil Queen wonders if Henry is looking for the pen that’s in her hand. He’s surprised that she’s managed to de-snake herself. He wants the pen back, but she thinks he’s going to write her out of the story. She says that’s what Regina wants. Henry says there’s good in her like there’s bad in Regina, and that means she can change. He doesn’t know what he was going to do. She finally got her revenge, and is she happy? She says she will be. He asks what she’s planning. She says it’s something that he won’t like, but he’ll realize it’s for the best. She gives him something for Regina, and says no matter what anyone else says, she loves him.

Back in the day, the Evil Queen’s father says they need to talk. She says she knows he’ll say revenge won’t make her happy, but she wants to find out for herself. He says he’s there to help her get it. He talks about how happy she was riding, and she says that’s the day she met Daniel. Her father doesn’t believe that killing Snow will help her, but he thinks he can get her what she wants. He gives her a map that will lead to something that can find Snow.

Forward in Storybrooke, Regina shows the others what the Evil Queen sent to her. It’s a page from the book that’s been ripped out – Robin and Regina kissing, an ending that will never be. The Evil Queen wants her to know that she’ll hurt Robin unless Regina faces her. They think it’s a trap, but she doesn’t want to leave Robin. Henry says maybe he was wrong and the Evil Queen can’t change. Regina wants to go alone; otherwise, she’ll hurt everyone she cares about and she can’t let that happen. The queen is getting what she wants – their fight ends today.

Robin says this wasn’t what he had in mind by wanting the queen to tie him up. He’s bound to a chair, and gets the rope undone, but it’s enchanted rope, so it ties itself again. He says all she’ll do is make a martyr of Regina. He tells her to release him; he doesn’t belong here, and neither does she. He thinks maybe he’s there to save her. She says she doesn’t need saving. He says she could use a place for a fresh start. Regardless, in a town full of heroes, a villain like her doesn’t stand a chance. She says the only one who doesn’t stand a chance is Regina.

In the Enchanted Forest, the Evil Queen’s father leads her to a portal. She says it’s dripping with light magic, and he tells her he found it through Tinkerbell. The Evil Queen says he lied; this wasn’t about getting her revenge. He tells her it’s about getting something better. They go through the portal, and see a statue of Cupid. He tells the queen that it’s Cupid’s arrow; it’s a tool. She can use it to see who loves her most, and use it to find him. The Evil Queen says she thought he was on her side. She says she’s getting what she came for – revenge.

On our side of the border, Hook is about to burn the dreamcatcher in the fireplace, and flashes back to killing David’s father. Emma sees him, and says it was him. He says he tried to tell her, but she found the ring and he didn’t want to ruin the happiness. He says he was a broken man for a long time. She says he was going to burn his memories, and he says he was ashamed and scared he was going to lose everything. She says it’s not easy, but he would have been forgiven. He says he’s destroyed his own family, and he didn’t know how he could live with destroying hers. She tells him that they can’t hide things from each other, and he should know that. That’s why she thought they were together, and when he’s ready for that, they can talk. She gives him back the ring.

Hook finds Captain Nemo, and asks where he’s headed. The captain says destinations never matter, and asks what happened. Hook says the captain gave him good advice, but he didn’t take it. He’s not the man Emma needs him to be, and he has to find that man. The captain once said that the Nautilus could help a man discover who he could be. Nemo says get on board.

Regina goes home, and the Evil Queen shows up, poof! in a puff of purple smoke. She shows Regina the shears and says she’s going to destroy her.

Meanwhile, back at the Cupid statue, the Evil Queen smushes up some flowers, and says now we’re getting somewhere. She’s going to find Snow. Her father says not everyone gets a second chance at love, and this arrow will allow her to gaze on who she loves most. She says there’s a thin line between love and hate, as Martin Lawrence learned in the movie of the same name. The tip of the arrow turns black, and she says that now she can gaze on who she hates the most, Snow White. She shoots the arrow.

Moving on. Regina says it’s always about revenge, and she’s ready. She says the town isn’t big enough for both of them, and the Evil Queen says they finally agree on something. The shears glow, and purple lightening bolts shoot between them. The queen tells Regina, see you on the other side, and cuts the bolts. Regina says, let’s finish this. They both make swords appear and start to duel.

Rewinding, the arrow heads to the castle. The Evil Queen says Snow must know she’s not there, and wants to steal from her. She goes back home, but can’t find Snow. She says the arrow should have led her to gaze on the person she hates most. She sees herself in a mirror and smashes it.

The Storybrooke duel continues. It must be weird fighting with yourself. Says Tyler Durden. Regina throws a disco ball at the Evil Queen. The Evil Queen throws her against the wall. She says Regina has been fooling herself. She’s all that will ever be inside of her. Regina says she’s wrong, and the tree mural wallpaper comes to life, trapping the Evil Queen in its branches. Cool! Regina says what’s inside her is real, and the Evil Queen can’t take it away. She takes the queen’s heart. The queen says she hates her. Regina starts to crush the heart, and sees herself in the mirror and remembers. She says she doesn’t anymore, and releases the queen. She says she’s going to do what they never could – be brave for the both of them and choose love over hate. She takes both of their hearts and puts them together for a moment. She puts the hearts back in their respective owners.

The Evil Queen wonders what’s happening to her. Regina says she gave her some love, and she’s taking back some of their darkness. She’s part of her. They’re part of each other, whether she likes it or not. Regina says she loves herself, and so should the queen. There’s a one-sided hug, and the queen tentatively hugs back.

Regina asks if Robin is okay. The Not-As-Evil-Now Queen says she kept her word, and sent him where he wanted to go. She says Gold was too busy worrying about his son to mind the shop. Regina is sorry she didn’t get to say good-by, but the queen thinks maybe it’s better that way. She asks if Regina regrets not walking into the tavern that day, but Regina can’t imagine a life without Henry and all of her Storybrooke friends. It wasn’t her happy ending, but it gave her hope when she needed it most. The queen says she wouldn’t mind some hope. She not sure what she’s supposed to do. She needs a fresh start but has no clue where that is. Regina thinks she knows who can help.

Henry asks where he should send her, and Regina says where she can start over and have a new life. Emma frets that it’s against the rules to change things. Henry says he’s not supposed to affect those in his book, but she’s not in it. Zelena and Snow are worried she’ll still seek revenge. Snow says she wants to believe in her, but not everyone is redeemable. Regina tells Snow that she’s given the queen what she needs to make the right choices. Zelena says don’t blame her if she wakes up to a crushed heart. The queen says that won’t happen – at least she hopes not. She’s truly sorry, and promises to do the right thing. She’s sorry for what she put Snow through again.

Henry calls the queen “mom,” and she says he never called her that before. They hug. Henry asks for his pen and if she’s ready. As he writes, the queen thanks Regina. Regina tells her to promise she won’t waste a single minute. Henry writes that the Evil Queen went to a place where she got a fresh start, and she disappears into some sparkly lights. They wonder where she went, and Regina has her ideas. I have an idea too – did anyone have her take the curse off of Snow and David?

The queen appears in a tavern. She wonders where she is, and then sees Robin. She sits across from him. He asks if she’s kidnapping him again, and requests to finish his ale first. She says that’s not what she’s doing, and he says her villain plan must not have worked out. She says she’s okay with that, since she had a change of heart (wink-wink). She was wondering if maybe she could buy him a drink. He says it’s his round; he’ll buy her one. They clink glasses.

Back to Storybrooke. Snow finds Hook on the docks. He asks if everything is okay. She says Regina did it – she vanquished the Evil Queen, and gave her a happy ending. She didn’t think it was possible after all these years, but it was. Love can save even the darkest souls. She says Emma told her about the engagement, and she couldn’t be happier. She tells him that Emma waited a long time for someone to share her life with, and Snow is happy it’s him. She leaves, and he looks at the ring. Oh, go on. Tell her.

Emma comes home to a dark house.

Nemo asks if Hook is ready for adventure. Hook says he’s going back to Emma, because even villains get second chances, and hopefully third ones. The Nautilus starts to submerge. The captain says he didn’t give the order. Gideon appears, and says that he did. He tells Hook that for what he has planned, Hook can’t be in Storybrooke. He disappears, poof! in a puff of red smoke. The Nautilus starts to go down into the water as Gideon watches from the docks.

Emma looks out window. She turns out the lights.

Next time, Emma wants to move on, Aladdin is back, and Ariel joins the team.

The Walking Dead

Tara talks about the women she met at Oceanside, and how they have guns. Enid asks Carl if he ever thinks about who he killed. We see the Alexandrians taking boats to the island.

Maggie teaches gardening at Hilltop.

Rick gives Michonne a boost up a tree. She asks when the clock starts, and Rick says as soon as she’s up there. Jesus and Daryl put together a bomb. Jesus says he should have tried harder to stop Rosita and Sasha. Daryl says they can take care of themselves. He knows people have to die.

Sasha has been taken prisoner. A dude asks if she’s okay, and she asks for water. He introduces himself as David. He says last night was a sh*tstorm, and he’s the guy who gave them the rope to tie her up. He says if he gives her water – which he’s not supposed to – will she do something she’s not supposed to for him? He asks how thirsty she is, tearing her shirt, and she tells him to go to hell and headbutts him. He says fighting will just make it last longer. Negan comes by and asks what he’s doing in there. Answering his own question, Negan says he’s trying to rape this woman, and it’s unacceptable behavior. Rape is against the rules there, and he wouldn’t want to be somewhere that was let fly. He takes out a Crocodile Dundee sized knife, and says David crossed the line. David says sorry, and Negan stabs him through the neck, saying he doesn’t accept the apology. He tells the guard to get Sasha a new shirt, and tells her he’s sorry she had to see that. He adds sorry about the rope, but she caused one hell of a fracas.

Negan says he remembers her. She was there, and he gets it now. He tells her that she’s got beach ball sized ladynuts. Ha-ha! The phrases this guy comes up with! He asks if Rick put her up to this. She calls Rick his bitch, and says no. He says that’s not the way it’s going to go; this could be the beginning. He puts the knife in front of her. He says she can use it to take him out, but since he’s above her, holding a baseball bat, that would be a bad idea. She could slit her wrists, but that would be a shame. She could do nothing, and let David eat her face, which would also be a shame. Or she could save herself, and join the cause. He knows what he’d do. He tells her that he’s a man short, and he’d like to harness the heat. She could help him run this place. That’s all it was ever about, and still can be for her. He knows it’s hard to picture, but they all have sh*t to get over. He tells her to think about it. No pressure. He apologizes again. He asks her to understand that they’re not monsters.

Eugene brings supplies to Sasha. He explains the pillow isn’t hypoallergenic. He shares that there was debate about him coming, and was told he’s on his own. He says taking up with the management was indeed the right select for him, and suggests she do the same. He says he was full tilt delusional, thinking he could be brave. Referring to Abe and Glenn, he says to see someone brave get killed like that, and then a repeat, he couldn’t. Being there means he’ll never have to again, and neither will she if she says yes. He says Abe would want her to. Then says, no, he wouldn’t. He does though. Things have changed, and they can change with them. They have to. She tells him to go.

Eugene makes a sad face. He looks at David, and says he’s starting to…and Sasha says go. He leaves, and she looks sad. David starts twitching, and opens his dead eyes. Sasha looks surprised, which surprises me.

Maggie is outside the Hilltop wall, unearthing a tree for transplanting. Gregory joins her, and she says she’s never seen him outside the wall. He asks where her friends are, and she says they’re looking for something they need. He wonders why she’s still there. He says it would be better if they could present a united front, and she says it would be easier if they were a united front. He says she’s right, and he needs to be more forthcoming. She says it’s never too late to change, and if he’s serious, she’ll talk with him later. She asks him to keep watch while she digs out the tree. He has a knife. He gets close to her. He makes a lot of faces, then looks like he has a headache, and doesn’t follow through. He sees a zombie, and Maggie says she’ll do it. He says he’s there to protect the pregnant woman. She asks if he’s done it before, and he says he wouldn’t be there if he hadn’t. He runs up to the zombie, chickens out when he gets close, and then says fine, do it. Yikes! Another one jumps him while Maggie is struggling with the first one. He calls for help, like she doesn’t have enough to do. She stabs zombie one in the head, and then deals with Gregory’s zombie. He pukes. Some guys are walking by, and stop to look at them. Maggie says he hasn’t killed one before; he’s learning. One of the guys says that’s not what he told them. Gregory thanks her.

On the island, everything is all idyllic. Tara is waiting for Tanya in her cabin. When Tanya walks in, Tara draws a gun and says hi. Tanya says they should have just killed her. Tara says she’ll be glad she didn’t. Cindy walks in and says Tara promised. Tara says she did, but she didn’t have a choice. She says her friends are out there, and they’re going to take this place. They’re going to fight the Saviors, and Oceanside should join. Tara says the Saviors came back. They killed her friends, her girlfriend, and took over. They’re doing whatever the Saviors want them to, but they’re going to fight back. With Oceanside, they’d have an army. Tara says they’ll win; just talk to Rick. She says she can stop it, but they have to tell her right now. She didn’t want to break her promise, but the world doesn’t belong to fair people. Tanya says if they take the guns, they’ll be killing them. Cindy thinks they should talk to Rick and try to stop it, but Tara says they can’t.

Explosions start happening. Michonne acts as a sniper just in case. Daryl tells a group to put their hands on their heads, and Jesus adds please.

Tanya asks if Tara’s people are killing her people. Tara says the bombs are outside the walls. She tells them that it’s time to move. They get the better of Tara. Cindy holds the gun on Tara and finds out it’s not loaded. Tara tells her to just talk to Rick. Outside, everyone is being rounded up. Gabriel tells them that they want it to be as simple and peaceful as possible, and they can make it that way. Rick says they made a lot of noise, and want to wrap this up quick. No one needs to get hurt. It’s about what they need.

Tanya comes out holding Tara in front of her. She says no one is taking anything, and to leave or Tara dies. Rick says nothing has changed, and to put the gun down. Tanya says they just want to be left alone. Rick says to let go or they’ll get killed. Cindy tells the people that Rick wants to fight the Saviors. Somebody says they tried that once, and it didn’t’ turn out so well. Tara says they’re going to win, with or without them. Cindy says it’s over, and Tanya says after everything they’ve been through, it’s futile to want to fight them. Cindy knocks her out while she’s yapping away, and here come the zombies. Rick tells everyone to shield the children.

They get ready to kill the zombie horde, and it’s a bizarre bit of overkill. They waste a lot of bullets for people who are concerned with gathering guns. To their credit, there are also a few head stabbers. Rick shakes hands with one of the women. Tanya tells them they’re not fighting; take their damn guns and go.

Meanwhile, back at Neganland, Negan sees that Sasha has dispatched David. She says you win, and he says no, you win. He tells the guard to get someone to clean the mess up. He takes the knife back, and says she has a ways to go before he’ll believe she’s on board. Baby steps. Still, the way she surrendered just now was a good start. They have to work on some things, but he’ll make it fun. He says a little birdie told him that Rick and company are up to no good, and she’s going to find them a win-win. He says he’s going to show her a taste of what they have to offer, and tomorrow is going to be a big day.

Gregory gets out the liquor. He looks at himself in the mirror. He pours himself a stiff one, and looks at a map. He calls for his driver and tells him to pack a bag.

Eugene knocks at Sasha’s door he says it might not seem like it now, but she also knows the correct select. She tells him that she was wrong. She says she’s trapped, and he has to help her. He says he’ll help her get used to the idea, but she says he has to get her a weapon. One way or another, they’ll use her to hurt their friends, and she’d rather not give them the chance. If they have her, Rick’s people will get hurt. She has to die; it’s the only way. She knows that Eugene won’t stop them, but don’t let them use her. She begs him to give her something to stop this. The worst thing about this whole scene is that Sasha is behind a closed door – we only see it from Eugene’s POV. I would think they could afford better sound at this point, but the dialogue was muffled. I was straining to hear what she was saying, and it’s not like I couldn’t hear the rest of the show. Eugene says he’ll consider it. We finally see Sasha and she’s smiling. She thanks Eugene. So I get why we only saw things from his side, but take a few bucks from the zombie budget and hire an extra boom person for the day.

Jesus gathers baskets of guns. That’s funny, since usually we hear about Jesus gathering baskets of bread and/or fish. Morgan asks if they really need all of it, and Rick says they do. Carl tells Enid that he thinks of the people he didn’t kill too. Tara tells Cindy that they’ll bring them back when it’s over. Cindy says she wants to go; some of them do, but not all, and it has to be all. She tells Tara that Tanya says they’ll die, but Tara says she’s been wrong before. Tara asks where she is and Cindy says she’s lying down. Tara thanks her for saving her life. Rachel asks if they’re taking it all, and Tara says yep, see you later, and gives her the finger. Rick asks if she’s okay, and she says he’s right; she doesn’t have to feel bad.

Commercial break with important information. Fear the Walking Dead will be back in June.

Sasha paces as much as you can in a tiny cell. There’s a knock. It’s Eugene. He says he’s given things a think, and he’s decided to grant her request. He slips something under the door. It’s a pill. He says certain death in 20-30 minutes. She starts crying because I guess she wanted a weapon. Did she really think it was going to be that easy? Eugene says that she’s honest, brave, and self-aware, and he owes her some things. He says he doesn’t want her to go, but it sounds like she’s gone already. Sasha wonders what the blip she’s going to do now.

Rick and company get back to Alexandria. Jesus asks about Sasha. Rosita says there’s someone here. It’s Dwight in a cell. Daryl goes ballistic, and Rick holds him back. Rosita says he wants to help them. Rick asks if that’s true, and Dwight says it is. Rick looks into Dwight’s eyes and says okay. He points the gun at him and says get on your knees.

Next time, an extended finale. Thanks for the heads up. BTW, I’ve really been appreciating how these shows run a few minutes over the hour as a general rule now. Why? Anyway, next time, Dwight wants Negan dead (get in line), Negan wants Sasha to get things back on track, and Ezekiel an Shiva join the fray.

💋 Feud: Bette and Joan is the best! Learning all the behind-the-scenes politics has been interesting. While it’s no secret that movie stars of the studio era had to play the game, there were power struggles going on with directors and producers as well. My two takeaways for this week are: I’m glad I never had to work with Frank Sinatra, and I wish I had a Mamacita.

🍑 My takeaway from The Real Housewives of Atlanta is how frightened I am that Porsha wants to breed. And that there’s someone willing to help with that.


March 24, 2017 – Sonny is Done, More Quotes for You & a Little Exercise


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Franco asks Elizabeth if she’s sure she wants him to move in. He says it won’t be her place anymore; it will be theirs. She thinks the boys will be thrilled, and he jokes that she wants a resident babysitter and art therapist. Elizabeth thinks it’s huge that Franco found the gap in Jake’s memory, and says she knows he’ll find more. In the meantime, Jake is happy and well-adjusted. She suddenly sees a picture has been drawn where the paper was blank.

Finn calls for Hayden. She says she was just resting her eyes. Ha-ha! My father used to say that when he didn’t want to admit he was asleep. Finn says he made it through withdrawal, and Hayden wonders when all this happened. He says when she was asleep and she’s like, yeah, right. He says she can let him go now. I think not.

Molly and Kristina visit Alexis. Molly says they’re worried about her. Alexis asks how Kristina is handling things with Morgan. Kristina says she hates Olivia-J, and Alexis points out that so does the rest of the world. They talk about Scout. Molly sees Julian’s letter and asks what the what?

Carly runs into Sonny at Perks. He was hoping to see Kristina, but she’s not on the schedule.

Finn tells Hayden that he could use a shower and some fresh air. If Hayden cuts him loose, they can go for a walk. She says it must be terrible to be taped to a chair like a hostage. He says there are scissors on the table, and she says she knows where they are, but he told her to keep him there until she’s sure the cravings are gone. She asks how long he’s been feeling better. He tells her it’s been a while, and she says that she wasn’t asleep two hours. Finn says who cares how long; it’s time to cut him loose. Hayden thinks they should wait, and he says he needs sleep in a real bed. He starts getting loud, and says that he doesn’t want to do this anymore. I have to mention this again. For someone who’s wet with sweat everywhere else, and supposedly going through withdrawal from a highly potent drug, his hair looks amazing.

Jason talks to Scout by the window, telling her what a great view they have, and how you can see the stars at night. He says when she’s older he’ll explain how starlight helped him find her mother. Sam is about to take over when there’s a knock at the door. It’s Curtis with a baby gift. He fawns over the baby and Sam lets him hold her.

Sonny asks Carly to stay and talk. She says they talked yesterday and didn’t get anywhere. He says under the anger he saw that they still love each other and there’s hope. He believes deep down she wants things to be better in the future, and he wants the same.

Elizabeth tells Franco that the paper was blank, and now it’s not. There’s a picture of a scarecrow. She says at least Jake is starting to remember, and Franco thinks it might be a breakthrough. Jake comes downstairs, and says he thinks he can go to school today. Elizabeth feels his forehead, and concurs. Franco tells him that he did a great job on the drawing, but Jake says he didn’t do it. Elizabeth tells him to go get dressed. When he’s gone, she says that she doesn’t think the other kids did this, and Franco says that Jake definitely drew it. She asks if Franco thinks he’s lying. Franco says he might have done it in his sleep, but it’s a repressed memory for sure.

Curtis tells Jason that he has a meeting with Jordan, and might get on the PCPD. Jason says if he carries a badge they can’t work together, but the bright side is, no more dumpster diving. Curtis says in a way, he’ll miss it; not the dumpsters, but working with Jason. He says they started off shaky, but they made a good team. He tells Jason to take care. Jason says if he gets in trouble, he can always call.  Curtis leaves, and Sam, who had gone to clean up Scout, asks if everything is okay. Jason says it’s strange, but he’s going to miss Curtis.

Kristina says she doesn’t believe a word of Julian’s letter. She says Julian pretends he was trying to protect Alexis, but Olivia-J was in town for a while and he could have warned her. Even if he knew he was being watched, he could have figured about a way. She says he’s a murderer and a liar, and the letter proves that they’re better off without him. Alexis says she just wants to know if it’s true, and asks Molly what she thinks. Molly says when he wrote it, it was meant to be read after he died, so it’s possible he’s being truthful. Kristina says that Alexis wants to believe a different concept. Alexis says if he’s dead, she’ll have regret that he died before she told him that she still loved him. We all heave huge sighs and throw our collective hands in the air.

Finn freaks out, and Hayden tells him to calm down. She says she’s not letting him go until he can act like a normal person. She sends a text and he gets paranoid. He says she doesn’t love him; she just wants to use him and throw him away, but he won’t let her.

Sonny tells Carly that they have to try. Carly says of course she thinks they should move past this. She knows nothing happens in a vacuum, and they’ve both made mistakes. He lied, and she knows he had his reasons, but she needs more time. He asks how much, and she asks how much time before he’s honest. She says if other circumstances hadn’t exposed Nelle, he would never have told her the truth, and he says he’s had enough.

Jason asks if Sam is okay with Olivia-J going to Darkham. Sam tells him that Olivia isn’t getting out any time soon, and now that Julian is dead, her mother will have time to heal. Jason asks how she’s feeling about Julian’s death, and she says she won’t miss any of it. She’s happy that Scout has a father who will protect and cherish her

Kristina says Julian was a narcissist, so he never doubted that Alexis loved him, but after everything he’s done, how can she? Alexis says she saw another side of him. Molly asks if she’s sure everything adds up, and she isn’t idealizing him. Alexis says she knows they’re thinking she wants revisionist history, but she just wanted to know if he loved her. Kristina says she’s justifying things, like Kristina did with Parker. Alexis says it doesn’t matter anyway, and Molly tells her again that they’re worried about her

Finn says he knows that Hayden was texting the pharmaceutical guy, and she can’t steal the money meant for the hospital. He says she’s a liar and a thief, and why didn’t he see it? She tells him to stop, but he keeps going on. Then says he’s sorry. He doesn’t even know what he’s saying. He tells her it’s the drugs talking, and asks her to forgive him. He seems to pass out for second, and when Hayden comes to his chair, he grabs her arm, startling the both of us.

Hayden tells him to let her go, and Curtis busts in. Curtis says he didn’t know what to expect, but it wasn’t this. The phone rings, and Curtis says that will be security. Hayden tells then that it was just a mishap, and everything’s fine. Curtis guesses this is DIY detox. Hayden makes him swear to secrecy. She says she’s helping Finn detox from a powerful drug, and he asks if she’s lost her mind.

Sonny wonders if Carly should ask his forgiveness for leaving when Morgan died. She says that she thought he was responsible, and toally misses the point. Sonny asks if she can imagine the burden. He brings up Jax, and she says that Sonny had Nelle in their bed. He says the bed she wasn’t in. He thought she’d left him and…

Thanks, ABC! You broke in with news that could have waited twenty minutes. We are not at war. It’s not even snowing. I suppose I should be grateful they came back to GH at all, and didn’t take up more time, showing us the line for the White House tour bathroom break, but when they returned, it was to a commercial.

Sam tells Jason that Alexis is trying to rationalize what Julian has done. Sam had told her she was lying to herself, and Julian would never be the man she wanted him to be. She thinks Alexis is afraid to confide in her now. Jason says to try telling her the truth about how she really feels. Sam says that Julian had potential to be a good man, but none of it matters anymore. She’s glad he can’t disappoint her again. Jason tells her to focus on how lucky they are, and then maybe on getting some sleep. He’s taking Danny to play at the Quartermaine’s, so she can have some peace and quiet.

Franco and Elizabeth recall the Jake in the story coming to a clearing and seeing a scarecrow. Franco thinks it was innocuous, and Elizabeth says that even though Jake hasn’t seen the book, maybe Helena planted the story in his subconscious. They decide to read the book again.

Sonny tells Carly if after all this time, she can’t understand that something like that could happen at the lowest point of his life, he doesn’t know what to say. Carly says he should have known better than to lie to her afterward. They were working their way back to each other, and she’d never felt closer to him. She asks if he thinks all this pain is her fault, and he says she made a choice to push him away. If there’s nothing he can do, she can stop running, because he’s not running after her anymore.

Hayden explains to Curtis why Finn didn’t go to rehab. He still thinks she’s crazy doing this alone. She says she can’t involve anyone from the hospital. Curtis gets that she loves him, but if he does detox, it doesn’t mean they’re home free. It’s not the end of his battle with addiction; it’s only the beginning.

Carly asks if Sonny is done. He says she should be relieved. When he tries to make amends, it only pisses her off. She asks if their marriage is over.

Elizabeth and Franco get out the book and the doorbell rings. Franco says would be creepy if it was Helena. Yes, it would. It’s not though. It’s Jason with a baseball glove for Jake. Elizabeth says they want to show him something. Jason asks what the book is doing out, and she says that’s what she wants to talk about. Jason asks what’s going on.

Molly and Kristina visit Sam, and gush over Scout. They ask if she read the letter, and she says no. Molly says she should, and Kristina says it’s the usual crap. Sam wonders why Alexis isn’t with them, and Molly says she’s at an AA meeting. The girls are glad that Alexis is taking care of herself, and Scout acts cute.

Alexis comes home. I question her décor, or lack thereof. Her place is awfully bare. She pulls a bottle out of her bag. Rolo’s wine. I’m sure it’s very pricey.

On Monday. Sonny talks to Laura, Jason wants Jake out of Elizabeth’s house, and Lucy is back.

Quotes of the Week

Offense is always an opportunity to identify what is lacking in our own heart. – Unknown

If you set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at any time, and you would achieve nothing. – Margaret Thatcher

There’s not much we can do, you know. We can only do what we can do. – Becky discussing politics on The Real World: NYC (the first season)

🏋 That last one led me to remember my favorite strength training instructor, Margaret Richard, who’s had a PBS show called Body Electric for many years. I have some old tapes where two gems from her were: The stationery leg is stationery, and, If you’re working in front of a mirror, the mirror will be in front of you. These quotes by no means diminish Ms. Richards talent as an instructor, but are merely the kind of thing we’d all come up with, trying to chat while doing a painful challenging exercise routine. Taking it a step further, I checked out what Margaret is doing these days, and it turns out she has a kickstarter page to fund her latest project. She changed my life, so if you want to check it out, go to:


Some psychedelic love to send you off on your weekend…




March 23, 2017 – Adios Olivia-J (for now), a Torch & a Quote


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Jordan tells Olivia-J it couldn’t happen to a nicer person. She explains about Darkham being a super tight facility, and since she can’t be cured, she won’t be getting out. Jordan says they have all the witnesses they need, including Winston, who has all kinds of incriminating stories.

Hayden comes into Finn’s room holding Roxie. She sees Finn shivering on the couch.

Tracy goes out to dinner and harasses the waiter. When he asks if anyone will be joining her, she suggests he put up a neon sign that says “Alone.” Someone asks if the other seat is taken. I guess they didn’t hear her outburst.

Elizabeth comes home, and Franco says the kids are upstairs. He tells her that paradise awaits.

Jason and Sam marvel at Scout. Sam says it’s the first time she’s actually brought a baby home from the hospital. They get mushy over the baby, and the doorbell rings. It’s Sonny.

Ned joins Tracy, asking if she wants to talk about it. She’d rather talk about him, and asks if he’s meeting his fiancé. He says she’s not his fiancé. Tracy asks if he had a change of heart, but he says that Olivia-F turned him down.

Hayden tells Finn that she found Roxie outside. He says she wants her way all the time, and he told her that if she didn’’t like it, she should go. He didn’t think she’d take him up on it.

Elizabeth unwinds, soaking her feet, and says it’s exactly what she needed. Franco tells her that she has pretty feet. She has a sip of wine, and says she’s sufficiently relaxed. She asks about Jake, and Franco tells her that the art therapy went well, but it’s going to take time.

Jordan says whatever Olivia-J paid Winston, it didn’t buy his loyalty. She was gone for a lot of years, and someone helped her get to China. Whoever it was, left a trail, and she’ll find out. Olivia laughs at her. Jordan walks out, and Curtis says it looks like someone pissed her off. He’s glad it’s not him this time.

Sonny brings a stuffed bear for the baby. He asks if they heard about Olivia-J. She’s been declared unfit to stand trial, and they’re sending her to Darkham. Sam says she thought he wanted her to pay, and he says she will, trust him. He tells them to enjoy their baby. There’s no more trouble; Olivia is done. Scout wakes up, and Sam gives her to Sonny, who threatens not to give her back. Maurice Benard is always super cute with babies. Factoid: He has a few kids of his own, and also adopted his wife’s little sister. Sonny tells Scout that if she ever gets in trouble, to call Uncle Sonny. Let’s hope she doesn’t need to.

Sam takes Scout off for a diaper change. Sonny asks if Jason remembers when Michael was small, and says there’s nothing better. Jason says he talked to Carly, and Sonny says she told him. She’s happy that they found out who killed Morgan, but pissed that he slept with Nelle. Sam comes back, and Sonny says he has to go. I tell Scout to stop looking at the camera or she’ll be an eight-year-old by next week. Sam asks Jason what that was about.

Jordan asks if Curtis is there for update. She tells him that Olivia-J is going to Darkham, an will be in that hellhole until the end of time. Curtis says he feels badly that no one will get their day in court. Jordan asks him to stick around.

Franco shows Jake’s drawings to Elizabeth, explaining that the theme is favorite things from when they were little. She asks why there’s a blank space.

Hayden runs the shower and starts to undress Finn. He asks why she’s doing this, and she says she cares about him and he took care of her. She puts him in the shower with his clothes on and gets in with him. I notice how great his hair looks and then think, shouldn’t he look sweaty or something?

Tracy is aghast that the fishwife of Bensonhurst turned Ned down, and asks how dare she? Ned is surprised at her reaction, since Tracy didn’t want them to get married. Tracy says that’s because Olivia-F isn’t good enough for him, not the other way around. She asks what problem Olivia could have with the family, since it’s an honor and a privilege to join their ranks. Larry Ashton appears, and says he couldn’t agree more. A new actor is playing Larry, but I can just tell who he is.

Different Larry sits down, and Tracy asks what he’s doing in Port Charles. He asks if Tracy told Ned about his letter. She says she didn’t want to entertain his drivel, and he was looking for cash. He says just the opposite; an unexpected windfall landed in his lap. She asks what that has to do with her, and he says everything.

Finn thanks Hayden. She says he thought since he’s a doctor, he could cure himself, but he’s human like the rest of them. She tells him that she has connections, and asks if he wants to get into a rehab. He says he’s not going to rehab.

Elizabeth says that all the years Jake spent with Helena are blank. Franco says he shut down and stopped drawing. Elizabeth thinks that’s bad, but Franco says not necessarily. He says if there’s something wrong, they’ll deal with it. Everything is going to be okay. She says she believes it, and doesn’t know what they’d do without him. She asks him to stay.

Sam wonders what’s up with Sonny; something seemed off. Jason says he and Carly are going through something. Sonny slept with Nelle, and Carly is having a hard time. Sam asks when it happened, and Jason says after Morgan died. She says the timing is terrible; they should be leaning on each other, instead of being miles apart. Sam redirects Jason’s attention to the baby. They talk about how lucky they are.

Jordan thanks Curtis for everything he did. She says she was wrong about Sonny, and if it hadn’t been for him and Jason, they would have gotten the wrong person. He adds that the hospital might have blown up too, and she tells him that modesty will never be a problem for him. She says since he’s been back, he’s only wanted one thing. Sonny interrupts. Jordan tells him Olivia-J is being picked up soon. He tells Jordan that he wants to say good-by. He asks what’s the worst he could do; he just wants to say his piece. Jordan tells Curtis she wants coffee far away from the interrogation room.

Sonny goes in. Olivia-J says, we meet again. She asks if he’s there to make more threats. He says he’s done with that. He’s making her a promise.

Jordan says she knows Curtis was interested in joining the force. He says that he’d thought it was off the table. Jordan tells him that she’s willing to put it back on.

Sonny tells Olivia-J that he kept Carly from shooting her because Carly would have gone to jail. Plain and simple, she killed the wrong boy, and he’s not a helpless parent bound to the legal system. She murdered his son, and he has the power to make her pay.

Jason and Sam say they’ve got the parenting thing. Danny comes downstairs.

Elizabeth tells Franco that it’s late. Why trek all the way home? Franco says the footbath has his name on it, and takes off his shoes.

Finn tells Hayden that he doesn’t play well with others, and won’t make the best patient. She says he’ll probably be too sick to care. He says he just signed a contract with a pharmaceutical company, and what if word gets out? She tells him that it can be kept quiet, and he needs to worry about himself. He says he’s going to get clean on his own and needs her help.

NuLarry tells Tracy that she stands to gain a large sum. She says she doesn’t need money or him, and tells him to get lost. She calls him a lying, scheming liar who lies, and he tells her to ring him when she’s ready to talk. She says when hell freezes over, pigs fly, and the Cubs win the world series. Ned reminds her that the Cubs did win, and she amends it to the first two. Larry says it’s not about what they want, but what her father would have wanted.

Sam shows Scout to Danny. Jason says her name is Emily Scout Morgan, and Sam tells him that they’re calling her Scout.

Elizabeth and Franco bask in the afterglow. She says there’s more where that came from. He says he’ll have to come back. She says tomorrow, and the next night, and the next. He says it sounds like he’s living there, and asks if that’s what she’s asking. She asks if his answer would be yes.

Hayden thinks Finn should go to a rehab. He says he has everything he needs from the hospital, and can do it alone if he has to, but he doesn’t want to. She asks if those are the two options, and says that she’s in. He tells her that it’s going to get ugly, and she asks what he wants her to do. He says to tie him up.

Jordan asks if Curtis wants to rock the badge again, and tells him that she’s open for discussion. Maybe over dinner.

Olivia tells Sonny that she’s already paying. Mental instability is something they have in common. She asks if he hasn’t done something in the throes of a manic episode, and he tells her to stop talking. She knows that he wouldn’t do anything stupid, and wonders if he’s going to wait until she’s rehabbed and out. She asks if this is good-by until they meet again. He says there’s a disconnect. She’s not getting out, but she’s going to be dead. Scary Sonny.

Jason tells Scout not to let the peaceful thing fool her. Her mom is tough like her. He talks about watching her take her first breath. He tells her that her daddy will be there for her entire life, and he’s not a bad guy to have in her corner.

Franco says moving in is a big step. He’ll have to think about it. He thought about it, and okay, he’s in. Elizabeth says she’s excited and Jake will be too.

We see Jake’s drawing of the door.

Hayden says she’s not tying Finn to a chair. He says it’s going to get bad; he’s warning her. He won’t be the person she knows. He could hurt himself or her. The only way to guarantee their safety is to restrain him, and she’s the only one he trusts. She says okay; whatever it takes. He gives her the duct tape and says no time like the present.

Ned says that Larry knows Tracy, so of course he invoked Edward, her only weakness. He tells her not to fall for it, and she says she won’t.

Sonny tells Olivia-J to get comfy, settle in, make friends; it makes it so much better when it happens. He doesn’t want to ruin the surprise, but he’ll tell her the last sound she’s going to hear is his son’s name, and she’ll know the killer was sent by him. Extra scary Sonny.

Jordan asks Curtis to join her for dinner; it’s the least she can do to thank him. He says it had better be somewhere expensive. Officers come to get Olivia-J. They tell her they’re here to take her the facility, and she asks if Sonny sent them. They’re like, let’s go, and she gets all weird, and keeps asking if he sent them to kill her. As they lead her out, she calls for help, repeating that he’s going to kill her.

Tomorrow, Molly wants Alexis to listen, Finn begs to be let go, and Jason tells Curtis that they can’t work together.

🍰 Tonight, on MasterChef Junior, the kids used a blowtorch as a kitchen tool. This could have ended tragically, and would have had I been using it.

🐒 A Quote from My Favorite Play

Sometimes it’s necessary to go a long distance out of the way in order to come back a short distance correctly. – Jerry, The Zoo Story by Edward Albee


March 22, 2017 – A Fate Worse than Pentonville & a Coupla Thoughts


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Olivia-J might look fantastic in orange, but I will never agree that it’s the new black. Griff walks into court, and she addresses him as Duke.

Nelle tells Michael that running into him is a coincidence; she needed a child-friendly restaurant. Michael asks who her new friend is, and she says Charlotte is her new job. She’s a nanny.

Laura is surprised at the outcome of the hearing. She asks Doc if he agrees with Andre, and Doc says she shouldn’t question Andre’s credentials, and actually, he does.

Lulu goes to the Crimson office. Dillon answers the door, and she asks for Nina, who’s gone for the day. She wants to tell Nina how she feels about Valentin’s lies. She’s not Charlotte’s mother; Lulu is. She doesn’t understand why the courts wouldn’t give Charlotte to her. Well, displaying this kind of temper for one thing.

Nina tells Valentin that the next time he decides to have it out with Anna, to give her a heads up. He says the cloak and dagger stuff is over.

Obrecht tells Anna that she doesn’t perform house calls, even for old friends. Anna says she needs answers. Obrecht asks about what, and Anna says who – Valentin Cassadine.

Olivia-J says Griff reminds her of his father. He says he’s been called to testify as to what a dangerous person she is. She says he could have done that by affidavit; he can’t stay away.

Obrecht tells Anna that she knows next to nothing about Valentin. She says they exchanged a few pleasantries at the wedding. Anna asks about Victor and Helena, but Obrecht says they’ve never been mentioned in her presence. She knows less than Anna does. Anna says there is someone close to her who knows – Faison. Omgomgomg! I’m freaking out. In my 50+ years of watching this show, he’s my all-time favorite character. He’s what GH is all about for me – the spy stuff. Back in the day, with Robert, and Anna, and Sean, and Tiffany, and the Wellington Dog. Omg.

Nora tells Valentin that she’s picking up the judge’s decree, and Lulu will be starting her visits. Valentin says he’s already arranged something even before he got the document. Nora says it looks good to be magnanimous. The court will want them to follow the order, but also make decisions based on Charlotte’s best interest, even if it’s uncomfortable for them. Knowing Lulu will ultimately be to Charlotte’s benefit.To Valentin’s too, if she doesn’t stop acting like an idiot.

Dillon tells Lulu to take a breath; she’s about to talk herself into doing something crazy. He says it’s good Nina isn’t there. Lulu tells him about Andre’s evaluation. Dillon agrees that taking Charlotte away from Valentin would traumatize her, but Lulu says she’s been brainwashed into living with a murderer. Dillon gets the impression that Lulu isn’t allowed to see Charlotte at all, and she explains she has supervised visitation, with a reevaluation in six months. Dillon says it sounds like a win, when she’s making it out to be a total disaster.

Doc tells Laura that taking Charlotte away from the only parent she’s known will do more damage. Andre evaluated her and she’s happy. Laura says that’s because she doesn’t know any better. Doc says they have to want her to be whole and happy, more than they want her to be theirs. Laura asks if he’s saying she should be patient, and trust the courts and Lulu’s ability. Doc says that’s the advice she gave Lulu, but Laura is afraid it’s not enough. Valentin will rig the system against her unless someone gets ahead of him. Doc supposes that someone is Laura.

Nelle tells Michael that it’s not her dream job, but she’s going to be living in, so she can save money toward her goal of getting a teaching degree. Michael says he thought she’d want to get away from the mess. She says the mess she made, and asks if he’s telling her to go.

Valentin tells Nora that he tried to get along with Lulu for Charlotte’s sake, but Lulu doesn’t want to get along with him. Nina is afraid that Lulu will influence Charlotte against Valentin, but Nora says that’s why the visits are supervised. Valentin says Lulu is erratic, and Nora says that’s what people say about him.  She tells him not to give them anything to talk about. Nina tells her that Laura and Lulu are going to dredge up secrets from the past. Nora asks what they’ll find.

Laura tells Doc that she’s trying to protect Charlotte from the man who killed her son. Doc says the problem is how she’s doing it, and that sometimes the best laid plans come back to bite you. He tells her not to cut him out and let him help. He has to get to court, and she thanks him for caring.

Michael thought it might be easier for Nelle to start someplace new. She says not everyone knows what she did, so why not stay? She can’t make amends from somewhere else. She says hurting him wasn’t part of the plan, and if she doesn’t make things better, she wouldn’t feel right. He thinks she should focus on her new job, and the kindest thing is to leave them be. Nelle tells him that if he doesn’t want anything to do with her, she’ll leave him alone.

Obrecht isn’t happy, but Anna pleads with her, saying she’s desperate. She’s been on Valentin’s trail for months, used every contact, and come up with nothing. Obrecht says that Faison has freed himself from the shackles of obsession. He’s over her; beyond over. Why does she think he would know anything? Anna says Valentin was with the WSB and departed under strange circumstances. It wouldn’t be the first time an agent flipped, and she needs confirmation. Obrecht laughs, saying that Anna needs her. Anna says if anyone could get to Faison, it’s her. Obrecht says that she doesn’t know where he is, but hypothetically speaking, if she did, what’s in it for her?

Griff tells Olivia-J that his father is dead. Olivia says she sees his father in him, but not his mother. He asks what she knows about his mother.

Michael tells Nelle that Port Charles is big enough for the two of them, and she says a peaceful coexistence works for her. Charlotte bugs Nelle about the hot chocolate, and Nelle tells her to get them to go, introducing Michael as her friend. When Charlotte goes to the counter, Nelle thanks Michael for not involving Charlotte. She knows they’re not friends anymore. Laura walks in and makes a face like she smells something bad.

Dillon says anything less than full custody feels like set back to Lulu. Lulu says she wanted to bring Charlotte home. Dillon tells her that he doesn’t have personal experience, but he knows about Maxie’s experience. Lulu says she remembers, and it was the lowest she ever saw Maxie. Dillon says she wouldn’t listen for a long time, but when she followed the rules, things changed in her favor. Lulu says she’s not fighting a stubborn judge, but the man who killed her brother.

Valentin tells Nora that the judge can only rule on provable fact, and he has no prior convictions. She asks if he covered his tracks. He says that he wanted to make sure nothing ever touched Charlotte, and he did what he had to do, so let them dredge up the past. Nothing will stand between him and their future.

Obrecht tells Anna that it will cost. She wants Faison and their daughter, Britt, to be free to come out of hiding, and all charges dropped. Anna says she needs an act of God; she doesn’t have that power. Obrecht says if Anna can’t make it worth her while, she has nothing more to say. Anna asks if her family’s lives are worth the conversation.

Nora tells Griff to back off. Olivia-J is a sick woman. And her client. She’s very busy in Port Charles! Griff apologizes, saying he didn’t want to cause a problem, but Olivia said something confusing. Nora asks if he wants to cause Olivia more problem before her hearing. Another lawyer comes in, and Nora says Griff needs to stop bothering her client. The lawyer tells him not to talk to them. Nora tells Olivia to keep focused, and let her do the talking. Judge Sanchez takes the bench. He goes through the million charges, including 315 counts of attempted murder for the bomb at GH. Nora looks surprised. The judge says they’re here to assess Olivia’s fitness for trial.

Doc does an evaluation. He says that Olivia-J is lucid, but has no perception that murder is wrong because she has no moral code. Nora says they’re here to see if she’s fit to stand trial, not whether she has a moral code, and Doc says she’s been in psychiatric hospitals several times. The prosecutor says she has a history of faking it, and asks if Doc can say she’s not faking now. Doc says he can’t.

Griff is next. Nora talks about Olivia-J thinking he was Duke. He says she was trying to restore Duke’s soul using him as a vessel, and he played along. Nora says Duke was decades older; how could she not see it? He says she was acting strangely, and he was afraid for Anna. He hoped if he played along, it would buy more time. Nora asks if she’s called him Duke since then, and he says yes, when he came in to court.

Judge Sanchez says that Olivia-J definitely lacks the capacity to stand trial. He says she’ll be remanded to Darkum Asylum until her competency is established.

Afterward, Griff asks Doc if he’s dealt with this kind of thing before, and how long before she can stand trial? Doc says she may never see another day in court.

Obrecht accuses Anna of resorting to extortion by targeting her loved ones. Anna says she was talking about Valentin. She says Nathan can’t stand him, and thinks he tricked Nina into marriage. Valentin is a Cassadine, and lives in a web of secrets and lies. Nina is impulsive, and if they start fighting, Nathan might intervene. Obrecht says all the more reason for her to steer clear of Anna, and let her fight her own battles. Anna says Valentin might not be a problem today, but one day it will be different. Obrecht tells her that even if she agreed, it’s no guarantee Faison will help her. Anna says he might not help her, but he might help Obrecht. She has no reason to trust him, but she’s out of options. Obrecht thanks her for the tea.

Valentin wants to celebrate their victory. Nina asks if he wants to take the celebration home. Since Charlotte has a new nanny, they can have some privacy. She tells him about Nelle having worked for Carly, and how they’re not fans of Nelle’s.

Dillon tells Lulu that if she wants her daughter back, she has to play by the rules. Lulu doesn’t know how she became the bad guy in all of this. Dillon says she’s not a bad guy, but this makes it easier on Charlotte, and six months will go by before she knows it. Lulu whines that so will Charlotte’s childhood, and if she only gets one lousy visit a week, how can she build a relationship? He tells her she has no other choice. She says there are always other options, but Dillon says if they go wrong, six months can turn into forever. He asks if she wants to take that risk.

Laura calls Lulu to come to Kelly’s. Laura tells Nelle that she’s Charlotte’s grandmother. Nelle says she’s her new nanny, and hustles Charlotte out. Laura approaches Michael and asks for a word. Okay. Blue! Sorry, I had to. She noticed he was talking to Nelle, and explains that Charlotte is her granddaughter. Michael says sorry about the custody hearing not going in Lulu’s favor, but Laura wants to know about Nelle.

Nina tells Valentin that Nelle was sweet with Charlotte, but she thinks the reason she hired Nelle was because she lost her temper with Bobbie. Bobbie told her that Lulu wouldn’t approve, but why should she have control over who they hire? Nelle and Charlotte return. Nina takes Charlotte to go do something, so that Valentin can interview Nelle. Nelle starts to explain why Carly let her go, and Valentin says he trusts Nina, and he’ll make sure she’s vetted properly. He can see she loves Charlotte, but if anything should happen to her under Nelle’s care, they’d never find her body. Nelle says she’ll keep that in mind.

Michael tells Laura that Nelle was Josslyn’s kidney donor. Carly had hired her, but she doesn’t work for Carly anymore. He says it’s best if she asks Carly about it. He tells her for what it’s worth, Nelle does have a background in education and was great with Josslyn, so he doesn’t think she’d make a bad nanny. He’s not comfortable saying anything else because they’re not friends anymore.

Nora explains the transport to Olivia-J. She wishes Olivia good luck. Olivia tells her to tell that old cowboy of hers that she said “hi,” and then acts like she doesn’t know what she said. Very cute nod to Tonja Walker having been on One Life to Live.

Griff comes by Anna’s place. He tells her that he came from the competency hearing (come to think of it, shouldn’t Anna have been there?), and Olivia-J was declared unfit to stand trial. He says that she’s been remanded to Darkum Asylum, and Anna says she’s finally got herself trapped. She tells Griff that Olivia has a history of conveniently timed mental health issues; she tries to work the system, but what she doesn’t realize is that Pentonville is a spa in comparison to Darkum. Griff doesn’t think she’s going away that easy. He tells Anna that she said something about his mother.

Lulu meets Laura. Laura says she had a run in with Charlotte and her new nanny, who she thinks might prove useful. I love how she said it was a “run in,” like it was the Jets and the Sharks.

Nelle brings Charlotte back to Nina’s office. Nina hopes she wasn’t intimidated by Valentin. She tells Nelle that he’s a teddy bear once you get to know him.

Nora gives Valentin the judge’s decree. Obrecht makes a call; we assume to Faison. She says you’ll never guess who needs help and why.

Griff tells Anna that he tried to get Olivia-J to clarify what she was saying, but the court was called to order. He says she’d looked at him as if seeing him for the first time, and said she didn’t see a trace of his mother in him. He asks if Olivia knew her, but Anna says she didn’t meet Duke until she came to Port Charles. He asks what about before that, and Anna says anything is possible, but she was probably just trying to get to him. Her best advice is to let it go. Olivia is out of their lives, and there are more pressing matters, like Valentin.

Valentin thanks Nora. He tells her as for the other matter, the money has been wired. She says she hopes everything was to his satisfaction, and that his associate won’t spend one day in prison, but Olivia-J won’t be seeing the light of day either.

Tomorrow, Tracy is shocked that Olivia-F turned down Ned’s proposal, Jordan admits she was wrong about Sonny, and Sonny tells baby Emily to call if she’s ever in trouble.

👷 Laughing when Dr. Tudball Nowzaradan, from My 600-lb Life, showed up at someone’s house, wearing a lab coat with a stethoscope draped around his neck.

🎶 Dammit! I miss Star already. I considered watching Empire, but if I’m going to do that, I want to see it from the beginning. This should be my biggest problem.

March 21, 2017 – Finn Makes a Decision, Wrong Loving is Back & More Hong Kong Hijinks


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Obrecht complains about Finn’s leave of absence. She asks Hayden what the reason is.

Tracy calls out for Finn. No answer. She starts to call security, and then says never min. Finn walks in with a bottle of wine, and asks what she’s doing there. She says she has a better question – how much Zen Zen did he shoot tonight?

Michael and Dante talk about Olivia-J, and Michael thanks him for hunting her down. Dante says Carly and Sonny had her at gunpoint when he got there, but must have realized killing her would only make things worse for their family. Michael says they got justice for Morgan, and now have to face what’s left of their lives.

Bobbie asks Carly if she ever returns texts. Carly apologizes for forgetting they were supposed to meet. She went to see Jason and the baby, and also saw Sonny. She tells Bobbie they kissed, and Bobbie asks if they’re reconciling. Carly says they’re the only ones who understand one another, but that doesn’t mean they should be together. Bobbie brings up Nelle sleeping with Sonny, but Carly is more concerned about the lies and that he left them wide open to Nelle’s machinations.

Nelle explains to Nina that she had to put her teaching degree on hold due to finances, but she was working as a teacher’s aide.

Valentin tells Anna that she’s interfering with the happiness and future of his family, and if she doesn’t back off he’ll remove her. She takes this as a threat, and he says he means he’ll remove her presence from his life. He says if warring nations can call a truce, they can too. She says he sounds reasonable, but that’s one of his talents, presenting something outrageous and making it sound rational. She says peace and ignorance are two different things. She wants the truth and won’t stop until she gets it.

Nina is amazed at Nelle’s experience, but says being a nanny is different. Nelle says it is, but you still need the same skills, and she can also provide tutorial help. Nina asks why she quit so abruptly. Nelle says she didn’t exactly quit, and Nina asks why she was fired.

Michael tells Dante about Sonny’s lying. Dante asks what’s up with Michael. Michael says he’s focused on getting Josslyn through it, but Dante is talking about Nelle. Michael tells him that a lot of people got hurt, but he’s the least of the damage.

Bobbie tells Carly that they always end up together again. Maybe there’s a reason, or maybe it’s the tipping point; time will tell. Carly thinks maybe she deserves it, but Bobbie says it’s Nelle’s fault. Carly says she keeps trying to make sense of everything and find something real, and all she can come up with Is that she’s a hypocrite. She wonders if it’s karma and payback for what she did to Bobbie.

Valentin calls Anna’s memory loss a pretense and a mind game. Anna says why she would do that. She says they have a past, but he goes out of his way not to talk about it. Just tell her what she needs to know and they’ll be done with it. He says he almost believes her, and to ask him anything. She asks why she put out a kill order against him.

Tracy asks if Finn is ignoring the question. He says she ignored his, and asks again why she’s there. She asks if he took Zen Zen, and he asks if it looks like it. She asks about the mess, and he tells her that it was the last of his supply and he fumbled it away. She says maybe he saved his own life. She asks for drink, and he shoves one at her. She asks when he’s checking into rehab, and he says no room at the inn. Tracy offers to pull some strings, but he says he’s changed his mind. He’s not a group therapy kind of guy, and needs to do it alone on his terms. Tracy calls him asinine.

Elizabeth tells Obrecht that Finn is working on an article about his cure a prestigious medical journal. Obrecht says it didn’t take long for his ego to kick in. Elizabeth says when he comes back, maybe he’ll be a better doctor, and Obrecht says that by this time next year he’ll probably be on a book tour. Obrecht leaves, and Hayden thanks Elizabeth. Elizabeth says she’s there if Hayden needs her.

Anna tells Valentin that a kill order was issued in her name, and he owes her the truth. Valentin gets angry, saying he owes her nothing. He could have pressed charges or left her for dead, but didn’t. He just wants to forget her. She says she would never have done something like that unless he flipped, and asks if he was working for the DVX.

Nina says Nelle seems capable, but she doesn’t want to get in the middle of a disagreement between Nelle and Carly. Nelle understands. Charlotte shows them her puzzle and thanks Nelle for helping her. Nelle starts to leave and thanks Nina for the dress. Nina tells her wait. She says obviously Charlotte loves her, and she would be an asset for her starting school, so let’s do an interview. She’ll need to know whoever takes care of Charlotte on a personal level, and Nelle asks what she has in mind.

Bobbie tells Carly they put all that to rest years ago. Carly says she never understood how Bobbie must have felt until now. She and Tony were trying to rebuild their marriage, and never got back together. Bobbie says they separated because of what happened, but other things came up and they made wrong choices. He lashed out at the world, and she was trying to make peace. Carly asks if Bobbie is saying that she should forgive Nelle, but Bobbie says that’s different. Nelle isn’t her flesh and blood, and the sooner Carly puts Nelle out of her mind, the better. She tells Carly about Nelle having been at the MetroCourt earlier, and how she told her to get out before she called security to put her out. Carly says looks like security might get a second chance, as Nelle steps out of the elevator.

Elizabeth finds Hayden in her office. She wants to explain why she intervened. She didn’t want Hayden to be blindsided. She says that she knows it not easy, and Hayden knows where to find her if she needs anything. Hayden asks her to stay.

Tracy asks Finn why he thinks he can just quit. He says since he’s been cured of the disease, he’s better able to quit. She says it doesn’t look like it, since it’s been weeks already. Finn says he doesn’t want to be in a program that will box him in; he’ll lose his mind and be back where he started. Tracy asks if the plan is to drink himself into a stupor for 28 days, and he thinks that sounds good. He asks her to leave him alone and says she can’t help him. Tracy says Hayden can. Finn doesn’t want her to see him like this, but Tracy says she loves him, and to let her in or let somebody in. He says she’s the last person who should be giving relationship advice.

Michael tells Dante that he can sidestep a hostile takeover, but didn’t see Nelle coming. He should have known better and was too trusting. Dante says what’s the solution, being a cynic and building walls? Michael says he doesn’t know how to feel. Nelle said she wanted a fresh start, and for a moment, he wanted to believe her. Dante asks if he does, and Michael says it doesn’t matter. She did what she did, and everyone is hurting

Bobbie tells Carly that she’s going to take out the trash. Nelle says she doesn’t want any trouble. Nina pops out with Charlotte, saying there’s a child present. Carly says she’ll be glad to tell her why Nelle was terminated, but it’s not for little ears. Nelle takes Charlotte aside. Nina says she doesn’t know what’s going on, but she needs a nanny. Carly says hiring Nelle will be the worst mistake she’s ever made.

Valentin asks if Anna’s selective memory allows her to remember that she was a double agent. She can project that he’s responsible, but it’s really on her. She asks if something as insignificant as a rebuffed kiss made him sell out, and he says she’s either lying about the cruelest thing she ever did, or she’s blocking it out. She says he’s the liar with a charming exterior. He tells her that she’s bleeding.

Carly tells Nina that she fired Nelle because she slept with her husband. Her real name is Benson, and all the time she spent making herself indispensable, she was setting Carly up because of a grudge. Nina says sorry, but Charlotte loves her. Carly says so did Josslyn. Bobbie says Lulu isn’t going to have it, and Nina says she doesn’t care about Lulu’s opinion. Bobbie says Lulu is Charlotte’s mother, and if Nina doesn’t care enough to protect Charlotte from Nelle, she will. Nelle tells Nina to forget about the interview, and Nina says she’s hired.

Hayden tells Elizabeth that she knows Finn has challenges ahead and she’s been a classic enabler. Elizabeth says she loves him, and Hayden says she even used that, but no matter what she said or did, he refused to get help and pushed her away. She says he didn’t want her support, and said he had to deal with it alone, so she let him go, but hasn’t seen him since. Elizabeth says she thought it was up to her to get Lucky to see the light, but it wasn’t; his father got through to him. Hayden says Finn has no one else, and Elizabeth says you never know who will get through. She has to make peace with the fact that person may not be her.

Finn asks what Tracy’s marriage track record is. She doesn’t see what that has to do with it. He says she has a family business that she keeps chasing, although they keep firing her. He lists her faults, concluding with there’s no mark like rich lonely woman who didn’t get over daddy issues. She throws her wine in his face.

Finn apologizes for going too far, and says that he was just trying to push her away. He didn’t mean what he said. Tracy says he did, and most of it is true. She says her circle is limited. She never took much stock in friendships, and thought going it alone was the way to go, but alone is alone. Stephen Sondheim also pointed this out in Being Alive. Tracy says that most of her family is gone. The number of Christmas cards has diminished, and when she lies in bed at night, she wonders what her life would have been like had she let more people in. She asks if that’s what he wants.

Michael asks Dante how he could ever trust Nelle. She succeeded in breaking up their home. Dante says in playing devil’s advocate, he’s seen Michael sacrifice his own needs for the needs of his family over and over. If he decides to kick Nelle to the curb, do it for himself and no one else.

Bobbie is like, wait until Lulu hears. Nina tells Nelle that she’s Charlotte’s nanny provisionally. One lie or slip-up, and she’s out. She suggests taking Charlotte for hot chocolate, and of course she’ll have to meet Valentin. Nelle takes Charlotte out, and Bobbie says if Nina did this to spite her, the joke is on her. If Nelle ends up in bed with Valentin, she only has herself to blame. Carly tells Nina that when you lose your temper, it doesn’t make for the best decisions. Nina says she hired Nelle because she has an applicable background, and Charlotte loves her. Given the chance, people can change. Nina points out that hit happened with her and Carly. Carly says she was able to rebuild her life because someone gave her the benefit of the doubt. Nina says maybe someone should do the same for Nelle. Carly tells her that maybe she’s right, but maybe not, and to watch her back. What bugs me about Bobbie is that she’s so self-righteous and has no reason to be. She seemed gleeful coming at Nina, and I’m not liking that.At least Carly thinks about things.

Anna tells Valentin it’s just a cut, and Valentin says just a cut doesn’t bleed like that. Anna says it does if you’re on blood thinners, and tells him that she has cancer. She says it’s treatable, but not curable, and he asks if she’s up for challenge. She begs him to just tell her the truth. He says no, and starts to leave. She stops him, and he tells her that if she wants peace of mind, to forget they were ever in each other’s lives. On the porch, he’s obviously disturbed by the news.

Anna makes a phone call, saying she knows this is the last person they expected to hear from, but she has something important to talk about. For a moment, I wonder if she’s talking to Faison, but then I remember he’s on the lam and no one knows where he is.

Finn tells Tracy that he’d ask forgiveness, but he doesn’t deserve it. Tracy says being alone seems like a good idea, but it’s really sad. He has a woman who loves him and wants to share his struggles as well as his victories. The choice is his. She leaves ,and he picks up the phone.

Hayden thanks Elizabeth for listening and for the advice. She doesn’t want to hug though. Ha-ha! Elizabeth leaves, and Hayden’s phone rings. It’s Finn. He says he was wrong, and can’t do it alone. He needs her help.

Nina tells Valentin about Mrs. Evans’ sister, and says she quit abruptly. She says perfect candidate walked in, but if she catches her near his bed, she’ll strangle her.

Bobbie moans that first Lulu loses Charlotte to Valentin, and now Nelle is her nanny. Carly says the bright side is that with Nelle holed up on Spoon Island, she’ll be far away from their family.

Nelle and Charlotte go into Kelly’s. Nelle locks eyes with Michael.

Valentin asks Nina what he should know, and Nina says she’ll explain it later. She asks where he was, and he tells her that he was with Anna. He went to tell her that he wants to put history to rest, and offered a truce for the sake of his family. He meant what he said; she and Charlotte are all that matters, and the past where it belongs – in the past.

Obrecht comes into Anna’s house, saying she doesn’t really do house calls. Anna says she doesn’t need treatment; she needs answers.

Tomorrow, Laura wonders if Doc agrees with Andre, Obrecht thinks Anna must be hard up to ask her for help, and Nelle asks if Michael forgives her.

If Loving You is Wrong

When we left, there was a shootout at Rusty’s place, and Virginia was dangling the baby over the water where the gators live. She drops him into the water, and one of the cops shoots her. Lushion grabs Alex, and a bunch of guys go in to save the baby. As usual, Eddie acts like an a-hole, and Steven tells him to back off. Randal gets in his face, and he says Randal would be swinging from a tree if it wasn’t for him. Randal runs to the water.

Steven calls for an ambulance while Alex freaks out. Brad brings the baby to shore, and Lushion does baby CPR. The baby starts to cry, and even Steven looks happy. He has Alex warm the baby in a jacket. She thanks him.

Eddie grabs Brad and asks what’s wrong with him. He could have gotten rid of that thing. He says it’s no time to get soft, but Brad walks away from him. Alex goes with Steven to take the baby to the ambulance, while Randal harasses her the whole way. She gives the baby to an EMT. She says only one of them can go along, but they both want to go. Lushion is about to take Randal away, when the EMT tells them it’s okay.

Lushion says the FBI guys have the clean-up; it’s out of his jurisdiction. Eddie accuses him of being undercover FBI. Lushion tells him the drugs are making him paranoid. Eddie says that every time Lushion is around, the FBI shows up. He wants to know how that happens. He says he smells undercover all over him. Lushion says he thought the same thing about Eddie, but knows Eddie isn’t FBI material. Lushion tells him get out of his face. Eddie questions him about Claudia. Lusion asks how he got there, and Eddie says Steven asked him to back up Andrew, but he hasn’t seen him. He says he showed up at the crime scene, but there was no Andrew, and if he hadn’t shown up there, there would have been two more victims. Lushion gets loud, saying if he was FBI, he’d be checking the woods and lake for a missing officer. Eddie says that Lushion thinks he’s slick. Lushion says Eddie isn’t good enough to be FBI, but if he was Eddie he’d watch himself and make sure his tracks are covered. Eddie says he’s watching everything. Lesion says he’s always been right behind Eddie, watching. And I’m watching these two watching.

Lushion calls Steven over, saying they’ve already lost two officers, Pete and Andrew. Steven says he’s working on a whole cartel. Lushion wants to take Eddie down, but Steven says he’s getting a lot of heat about the cartel. He wants Eddie too, but they can’t blow this now. Lushion has to trust him.

At the station, Esperanza asks if the 911 operator has heard from the officers who went out, but she hasn’t. Kelly calls about Ramses. She says something happened at his house. She asks if Esperanza knows an officer named Rick, and tells her that he’s there now. She explains that he came after Travis harassed her, and Travis said something about Ramsey not coming back. She called Lushion about a restraining order, and he sent Rick. Rick went into Ramsey’s house and hasn’t told her what’s going on. Esperanza wonders why Kelly keeps involving herself in crazy stuff. Well, that’s because she’s a character in a Tyler Perry show. Esperanza can’t make any promises, but she’s on her way. Marcie is with Kelly, but Esperanza has no information on Brad either.

The EMT asks what happened. Alex says Virginia got what was coming to her, and Randal says yeah, a bullet between the eyes. The crazy bitch who did this burns in hell now. Randal tries to talk to Alex, but she isn’t having it. He wants to go to the hospital in Maxine, but the EMT says it’s three hours. He asks if it’s safe enough to go that far, and that he’ll be cutting it close. He has a court date and it’s important. What an a-hole! I hate Randal so much.

Alex can’t believe it. Randal says if his mother isn’t up and walking around, he promises her she doesn’t know what hell is. Alex says that she heard something and went to check the house, and Louise was unconscious. He asks if that’s the story she’s practicing, and Alex says that’s what she saw. He asks if she even called the cops. She doesn’t say anything, and he says he guesses that’s fair. He goes on about Alex letting everything bad in the world happen.

Joey opens his eyes. He tells his mother she should go home. Natalie asks how he feels, and he says not good. She tells him that he got shot, and he asks what happened to Quan. She says he’s dead, and Joey asks if he killed him. She says yes, and he tells her that he just wanted Quan to leave him alone. Natalie says he would have killed Joey. Joey starts to cry, and Natalie tells him not to stress himself; he’s alive. The doctors said he might not make it and wanted her to donate his organs. He says he doesn’t want to die, and she says he won’t. He says he’s in a lot of pain, but she tells him that’s to be expected. He tells her how sorry he is, and she says that when he gets out, she’ll kick his ass.

Joey asks about Faun, but Natalie doesn’t know. He asks if she got shot, and Natalie tells him that she did. He cries some more, and asks if she’s all right. Natalie says she’s been with him and doesn’t know. He says he needs to know how she is, and asks Natalie to find out.

In the hallway, Tilda asks Natalie if Joey killed her son. She says Quan didn’t shoot Joey, and she had to identify his body. Natalie says sorry, but Tilda says she doesn’t know what sorry is. She says Joey won’t live long – if he makes it. Natalie says if harm comes to Joey, she’ll die defending his ass. She says Tilda forgot who she is and to get out of her face. Tilda says that Natalie’s broke ass can’t say anything. Natalie asks how much she has, and Tilda says millions. Natalie says she earned it on her back and knees better than on feet in burger joint. Natalie tells her that her mother would be disgusted. Tilda says that Natalie thinks she knows her, and Natalie says she doesn’t, but she clearly doesn’t know herself. Tilda tells Natalie that she’ll be back, and Natalie tells Tilda not to threaten her. Tilda says if she has to identify her son’s body, so will Natalie. An eye for an eye. They almost tussle, but Lushion steps in.

Lushion asks what the hell that was about. Natalie says nothing she can’t handle. Lushion says he can’t leave her for a second, and asks about Joey. Natalie says he’s awake, and she was about to call Jackie because he wanted to know what happened to Faun. Natalie asks about Alex, Randal and the baby. Lushion tells her that they’re all fine, and goes into Joey’s room.

Lushion asks how Joey is feeling, and Joey says not good. Lushion says he knows the feeling. Joey says he killed Quan, and Lushion says he knows. Joey says he killed his best friend and didn’t mean to, and starts to cry. Lushion says it’s okay. Joey asks about Faun, and Lushion says Natalie is checking on her. Joey can’t believe any of this, and Lushion says what happened, happened, but the most important thing is that he’s okay. Joey asks why him. Lushion says sometimes things just happen; you have enemies you don’t even know about. He says Joey is a good kid, and he wouldn’t have shot Quan if he hadn’t come at him. Joey says he was just trying to protect Faun. He knew she should have had all that money with her, and explains that she made the deposits for the restaurant. Lushion asks if he knew they were trying to rob her, and says that if Joey hadn’t had the gun, things could have turned out differently. Quan was waiting for her. He tells Joey not to beat himself up about it. Joey says he keeps seeing Quan’s face, and Lushion says it will get better. Joey says he violated probation, and he’s going to jail now, but Lushion says they’ll take care of it later. Just rest.

The doctor tells Randal and Alex that the baby is okay. Randal wants to see his son, but Alex wants him to go home. The doctor says it’s not a good time, but she’ll keep them updated. Alex tells Randal that her parents are dead. He says they ruined her ass. He asks if she really doesn’t love him anymore, and I laugh. Boy, talk about not being able to get a hint. Alex says he really doesn’t get it? and he says he does. He says she played the only card she had, and now it’s his turn. He’s calling his lawyer right now, and taking “RJ.” He gets loud, saying that she set this up, and she can’t be a good mother from prison. She gets in his face and says she’ll never give him her child. He says that’s okay, the courts will, once she’s in jail. If looks could kill the both of them would be dead. They wait. Randal gets all smug looking. I always want to wipe that look off of his face.

Back in Maxine, Esperanza sees Officer Rick. She asks what’s going on, and he says he can’t talk about it. She asks if he always does everything by the book, and just tell her, but he’s not budging. She asks where Steven is, and says she can’t get ahold of anybody. She asks if he can tell her anything, but he says sorry. She wants to take a look at the scene and he says as long as it’s behind the tape. She goes inside Alex’s house

She tells Kelly she doesn’t know what’s going on. Marcie asks about Brad, but all she knows is that there are officers at the scene. Marcie wants to go there, saying that it’s taking too long. Esperanza says she should be resting – they all should be resting. Esperanza says she’ll wake the kids for school, and promises that someone will call her when there’s news.

Kelly looks out the window and gets upset. She says the coroner is out there. She starts crying, and says she can’t do this. Marcie goes outside. Kelly follows.

Marcie introduces herself to Officer Rick, and Kelly asks him what’s going on. He says there’s been a homicide. She asks if it’s Ramsey, and he tells her that they haven’t identified the body. He suggests she come to the station, but Kelly says she has to deal with getting the kids to school and her work day. Rick asks her to come after work. She’s verging on hysteria, saying no, no, no. He shows her a picture, and asks if that’s him. She says yes, and Rick tells her that he’s sorry, Ramsey is dead. Kelly weeps, saying too bad she liked him.

Next time, Travis confronts Kelly at the station, Randal looks for his mother, and Steven asks Eddie where Andrew is.

🙉 I swear to you, they claimed there would be a new episode of Too Close to Home afterward, but it was an old episode of Greenleaf. A show I’d love to watch, but don’t have the time for. This was just as well, as I love Imposters, and was able to catch this week’s episode on the first airing. Every week, it’s like a new layer to the intrigue gets added.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Erika wonders why Dorit would even bring up the pill thing if she didn’t think it was part of LisaR’s behavior. Dorit says that Erika is interrupting, and Erika says she talks too much. Dorit says Erika doesn’t talk enough, and Erika says she talks important sh*t, while Dorit talks boring sh*t, and too much of it. Dorit asks what Erika’s problem is with her, and at first, Erika lies and says she doesn’t have one. Then she says her problem is that Dorit is full of it, and she has no tolerance for BS. Dorit asks why Erika didn’t just say so, and Erika says she just did.

Erika says Dorit needs validation and is desperate for her attention. Dorit says that Erika isn’t even nice, so why would she want her attention? Erika says that Dorit doesn’t know her, and Dorit says she’s just giving her opinion. Erika asks if Dorit thinks she’s going to like her after everything that happened with the underwear. In her interview, Dorit says she thought they were past that, and we flash back to the both of them saying they’re done with Pantygate. Erika says she took something innocent and made it seem like Erika did it on purpose to get PK’s attention. In her interview, Dorit says she’s done nothing to Erika. Dorit says she never claimed that Erika did it on purpose, and LisaR – who can’t stand not putting in her two cents anymore – says that she did. Dorit says giving Erika the underwear was for a laugh, and she laughed. In her interview, LisaV says that Dorit wanted to bring levity to the situation. Dorit says she’s sorry, and Erika says it did hurt her feelings. She has them whether Dorit believes it or not. Erika says there’s truth in joking, and although Dorit thinks she’s cold, she agrees. She says she certainly doesn’t vie for Erika’s attention, and Erika says don’t talk to her at all then. Because we’re in middle school. LisaR says that Dorit should apologize for her husband looking, and Dorit says he’s a male. In her interview, Eileen says she wouldn’t expect Vincent to ever stare. Who knows unless confronted with the situation? Dorit tells LisaR to get out of her face, and Lisa says f-u. Dorit says she’s sorry everyone made such a big deal, and those participating in the argument throw up their hands. Dorit is like what do you want? LisaV interjects that she thought it was a joke. In her interview, Lisa says it’s a bit of a pile on, and if they felt that way should have said so at the time. LVP, always the voice of reason. Dorit says she wasn’t out to hurt Erika’s feelings, and Erika says, but you did Blanche! In her interview, Erika says what she doesn’t like is BS, and that’s what this is. She says Dorit is out to defame her. Honestly, I wouldn’t go that far.

They dock and Erika has a moment. She tells LisaV that she’s okay, and Lisa tells her that she doesn’t have to be. In her interview, LisaV says she doesn’t quite understand It, but the ice queen seems to be melting. Erika dries her tears. Kyle says there’s a lot going on because Erika doesn’t take crying lightly and doesn’t do it often. Erika takes a car back with LisaR, Eileen and Eden. The girls tell Erika how pretty she looks when she cries. Eileen seems to think acknowledgement of hurt feelings would have helped, ubt Erika says she’d have to mean it. Well, yeah.

Dorit says Erika has a glam squad who follows her and it’s gone to her head. She, LisaV, and Kyle are walking back. Lisa doesn’t get what the wall is for, and Kyle says it’s the way Erika was raised. Kyle sees Chanel and angels sing.

Back at the hotel. Erika apologizes, and the others are like, don’t do that. I agree, even though I’m not totally on her side. No one should every apologize for crying. Erika thanks Eileen for being supportive. She makes a joke about crying. Then they joke about being on vacation.

Dorit calls PK and asks about the kids. She says she’s dying, being away from them and PK. She tells PK that Hong Kong has proven to be a confessional, and tells him about the boat trip. She says that Erika thinks she’s desperate for her friendship, and PK laughs. He thinks Erika must be delusional. Dorit says that Erika has been holding resentment since Pantygate.

The girls meet for breakfast. Erika makes a point of ignoring Dorit. They’re going to see the giant Buddha. Erika says it’s 245 steps, and they’ll get in their cardio. In her interview, LisaR says Dorit is being a downer…like this one, and holds up a pill. BA-DUM-CHH! LisaV is hoping it will be a calming, spiritual experience. Fat chance with this group. Splitting into two groups again, they get in some sky cars that have clear bottoms. Cool! Kyle won’t look, Dorit keeps picking her feet up and squeaking. LisaV wants to rock the car, reminding me of my trip to Roosevelt Island with an old boyfriend, who also thought that would be amusing to do on the tram. The other car is totally calm. They see the Buddha on top of the mountain, and it’s breathtaking.

That is a lot of steps. It’s raining, and I’m guessing they were given ponchos and umbrellas, because they all look the same. Erika is depressed that her shoes are ruined. They spy a cow, and of course LisaV has to check him out. Kyle takes pictures.

At the Buddha place, there’s a fire where you light these long, thin tapers and say a prayer. Eileen says that her expectations have grown smaller. Where once she would have prayed for world peace, not she’s just wants Hong Kong peace among the chicks. Kyle checks in on Mauricio, who is having his eyebrows brushed by Portia. The trek is made up the steps. Kyle thinks it has to have some impact on these women. It’s huge. What a beautiful place.

Dorit has brought her makeup artist, which is funny considering what she said about Erika. She’s rocking a Madonna Blond Ambition ponytail. She talks about how Erika and lisaR weren’t talking to her at the Buddha, and feeling like she was among mean girls. Erika says she’s channeling Samurai Barbie, and Eileen looks like a glamourous babe from an old vampire movie. All in black,  form-fitting black cocktail dress with a black choker, red lipstick, pale, and hair like Veronica Lake. LisaR says it’s bad luck to toast with water, and it’s downhill from here.

Eden feels like there’s an elephant at the table, and LisaR asks if Dorit apologized. LisaV says that’s between them, and Erika says she hasn’t apologized. She tells LisaV not to minimize her feelings. In her interview, Lisa says if she laughed it off to begin with, none of this would have happened. Dorit asks what she was supposed to do, and Erika says shut her mouth or bring it to her privately. Dorit says she doesn’t remember insinuating anything. In her interview, LisaR doesn’t believe her, although she makes sure to tell us that when it’s herself, she really doesn’t remember. LisaR asks if Dorit trusts her husband. Dorit says implicitly, but Lisa insists she was threatened by Erika. Kyle is shocked. She can’t believe Lisa is talking about Dorit’s husband when they just got through how mistaken she was about Kim. She also mentions how crazy Lisa got when Kim suggested they talk about Lisa’s husband when they were in Holland.

Commercial break. The jury is in for Sweet Home Oklahoma. I like it.

LisaR tells Kyle to shut up, and says Dorit was threatened by Erika flashing. Erika wonders why there’s no deference to her, since she’s married too, and she doesn’t need a reputation. LisaR says it’s deeper than this, because she’s a clinical psychologist. She asks what was really going on; she wants to know what happened. Erika says she was made out to be a whore, or whatever adjective you want to use, but she’s the one who has to live with it. Dorit says that wasn’t her intention, but Erika says that’s the result. In her interview, Erika says she’ll have to explain it to Tom, and people would rather go for the sensationalism. Erika says it’s only funny when it dies in the moment. Maybe it’s me, but I don’t think Dorit is the one who kept it going.

Dorit says she didn’t realize and feels badly. Erika is like, now you thought about it, and tells her to apologize to Tom and then they’ll be square. Dorit says okay, but that’s not good enough, and Erika says she wants Dorit’s husband to apologize to Tom. I’m thinking Tom would either laugh about how ridiculous this is, or not care. Dorit says she can only speak for herself. She’s not going to tell PK what to do. Erika says she would go to her husband and say she did something wrong and needs help fixing it. LisaR tries to insert herself into the dialog, and Dorit tells her she’s trying to have a conversation with Erika. Eileen is practically holding Lisa back and Lisa keeps shouting for them to listen. Dorit tells her please, and Lisa just won’t shut up. Erika says this sucks. Dorit says she’s extremely sorry, and she didn’t mean to hurt Erika’s feelings, she swears on her mother’s life. Eileen says she didn’t mean it maliciously (exactly), and asks what she wants; Dorit didn’t kill her child. Erika gets all crazy about this remark and says to never bring up her kid again. Eileen says it’s just a figure of speech. Erika says Eileen’s kid doesn’t put on a uniform, and to shut the f up. Well.

Erika gets unreasonable and says no one knows what she goes through every night. Her kid isn’t out there, and f-u. Eileen keeps apologizing, and Kyle says it’s like someone took over Erika’s body. Erika keeps repeating don’t talk about her kid, and cries into her napkin. She says never criticize his choice, and bangs on the table. LisaR asks if she wants to leave, but Erika says no. Eileen tries to take a moment to honor Erika’s son, and Erika says she doesn’t want that, and neither does her son. She doesn’t want to talk about it. In her interview, she says Eileen struck a nerve. Apparently so, but Eileen should stop trying to fix it. Everyone tells her that Eileen didn’t mean it, and Erika says no one understands. Eileen says she has the utmost respect for Erika’s son. Quick analysis. Erika is one of those people who expects you to be a mind reader. She doesn’t reveal how she feels about anything, so you’re just supposed to figure it out. And Dorit is just a scatterbrain.

LisaR wants to change the subject, since she’s feeling left out. It’s her last night in Hong Kong, so her last chance to get things out. Because the world is also ending as soon as she leaves. She asks Dorit why she got left alone at the end of some dinner party at Dorit’s house. We see a quick clip of her talking to some guy at an empty table after dinner. Kyle asks what she’s insinuating, and Lisa asks if people were doing coke in Dorit’s bathroom. In her interview, Kyle thinks it doesn’t get much more offensive than this. LisaR seems drunk to me. Just sayin’. I’m also laughing because I doubt an entire table of people got up and crammed into the bathroom to do coke in 2017.

To be continued…

Next time, Dorit refers to her house a coke den, Dorit thinks LisaR acts like two different people, Erika does Young and Restless, and there’s a huge party.

March 20, 2017 – Charlotte Needs a Nanny, the VanderWedding Begins & a Couple of Other Things


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Anna gets a paper cut, which is a big deal if you’re on blood thinners. Andre drops by. He tells her about doing Charlotte’s evaluation.

Valentin, Nina, and Charlotte are having a celebratory meal at the MetroCourt. Valentin tells Charlotte that no one is ever going to take her away from him and Nina. Lulu and Laura walk in.

Tracy tells Hayden that she has good news for once. They got their first payment, and the hospital is on its way to financial solvency. She asks where Finn is, and Hayden says that he’s taken a leave of absence to deal with his addiction.

Finn is on hold with a rehab. He’s looking for an immediate opening. He tells Roxie it’s a wonder anyone gets clean. I can totally agree with this and identify. Several years ago, my alcoholic neighbor, who’d been drinking since he was in fourth grade, finally decided to get sober. I took on the job of calling rehabs, and it took at least a week to find him a spot in one. At the time, I said pretty much the same thing that Finn just did.

Sonny tells Carly that she’s always welcome at his house. She’s kind of testy, and says she’s there to figure out what’s going on between them and what they do next. She says losing Morgan and thinking Sonny killed him was the worst thing that ever happened to her. Finding out Sonny was innocent eased the anger, but the pain of Morgan’s death is still there. She says Nelle is like an ordinary pain – it hurts, but it’s not going to kill you – but losing Morgan was like a bottomless pit, a pain threatening to swallow her. She gets that Nelle used it to get Sonny into bed. Sonny asks if she sees it clearly, why can’t she get past it?

Anna tells Andre about talking to Olivia-J. He asks why put herself through that, and she says maybe she’s looking for closure. She and Duke only got pregnant once, and losing the baby changed the direction of their lives. She says seeing Olivia’s insanity only opened up old wounds, things she thought healed years ago. Andre asks if she got what she was looking for, but Anna says not really. She tells him that Duke never loved Olivia, but she tried to force it, and it doesn’t work that way. Andre agrees, probably thinking about Jordan. Anna asks about the evaluation. Andre explains that Lulu was granted six months of supervised visits and Valentin got full custody.

Nina suggests that she bring Charlotte to the office. She has a basket of treats she hasn’t tested yet. Charlotte gets all excited because she loves Nina’s office.

Lulu points out to Laura that Charlotte is there. Laura tries to focus on the menu. She says they all have to find a way to be in the same room. If Lulu shows anger, it’s going to go against her. On their way out, Valentin and family stop by the table. Laura asks Charlotte how she enjoyed her lunch, and Charlotte can barely respond. Valentin wants to talk to Lulu, but she tells him to leave her the hell alone. Honestly, either she is the stupidest human on the planet, or has absolutely no control whatsoever. Or maybe it’s PMS.

Finn thinks compared to the bureaucracy of getting into rehab, getting clean should be a piece of cake. He tells the rehab that he’s calling on behalf of one of his patients.

Hayden explains to Tracy about Finn going through withdrawal. She realizes she’s never known him when he’s been clean. Every decision that he’s made, including being with her, was when he was under the influence. Tracy asks why she’s not with him, and Hayden tells her that he wanted to do it alone.

Finn explains his own situation, but calls himself “his patient.” He hopes they can find an opening.

Valentin says they can arrange for Lulu to see Charlotte before the court appointed document is filed, so Charlotte can get used to being with her. Lulu balks at the weekly hour that Valentin offers. He says she scared Charlotte the two times they interacted, and he wants to ease her into it. Lulu acts like an idiot, so Laura steps in.

Tracy tells Hayden that of course he wants to do it by himself, but that doesn’t mean she should let him. Wherever he is, she needs to be with him.

Finn packs pretty much like I do, just tossing stuff into a suitcase. He tells Roxie that it’s only temporary, and Josslyn will take good care of her while he’s away. He says he wants to be someone better, and realizes how much time he’s spending chasing the drug. He finds a vial in the suitcase.

Nelle comes to the MetroCourt with a garment bag. Bobbie gets snotty with her, and Nelle says she gets it; she’s not welcome. Bobbie wants to know how she lives with herself, and calls her a bitch.

Sonny tells Carly that he should have caught on. Carly says he was skeptical at the beginning, and he says if something is too good to be true, it is. Don’t we all know it. She says someone with her life experience should have seen Nelle coming a mile away. She asks if Sonny ever really trusted Nelle, or was just going along with it for her? He says he saw how happy Carly was with her, and when Morgan died, the first couple of days he needed help, and she was there. She helped with Avery, and he let his guard down. She showed up on Thanksgiving, and he was alone, drinking. The weird thing is, that he remembers nothing – not kissing Nelle or even wanting to. He just woke up the next morning and she was in his bed. Carly asks how long after that did he decide to keep it a secret? Um…immediately?

Nina gives Charlotte a giant cookie and says they’ll bring the rest back to the house. She gives Charlotte some coloring/puzzle books. Valentin says that Mrs. Evans can help her later, because Nina has to work. After Nina settles Charlotte in, Valentin asks if she’s coming home tonight. She thinks they should be honest with Charlotte. She makes sure he’s not interested in Anna anymore, and says she’ll see him at home. I’d thought they’d settled that.

Anna tells Andre that if Valentin had just told Lulu she had a child, he could have avoided all this. I dunno about that. She realizes she’s a hypocrite, because she did the same thing, hiding Robin from Robert. Andre says maybe it was a complex situation, and Anna says maybe Valentin’s is too. She thought she knew him, but he wasn’t evil in the past and seems to love his daughter, yet at the same time he keeps hinting at knowing something. He knows why she put him on the kill list, but won’t tell her. Andre tells her she needs to focus on her health, but Anna tells him not to tell her how to live.

Mrs. Evans calls Nina. Nina says she’s sorry to hear it, they’ll miss her, and thanks for everything she’s done. She tells Charlotte that Mrs. Evans has to take care of her sick sister, but doesn’t know when she’s coming back. In the meantime, they’ll have to find another nanny.

Nelle says if Bobbie wants someone to blame, look in the mirror. Michael made her see she didn’t need revenge to be happy, and it would have stopped if Bobbie hadn’t interfered. Bobbie says Michael dodged a bullet, and would never be happy with her lying ass. She tells Nelle to get out before she throws her in the gutter where she belongs.

Carly tells Sonny that the worst betrayal is lying and covering it up. He says he didn’t want her hurt more than she was already. She says she could buy that, if Nelle was as innocent as she seemed. Sonny says he had to figure it out. Carly says she bought his explanation because she trusted him. He kept quiet and played into Nelle’s hands.

Anna apologizes. Andre asks if he can say something as a friend, who also happens to have a degree in psychology. She asks if she can stop him, and he says she’s not used to being afraid. Her condition is treatable, but makes her vulnerable. On top of it, she re-encounters someone from the past. It’s natural to want to tie up the loose ends. Anna says life isn’t that simple; it’s messy and full of contradictions. She says she glosses over her own mistakes – no, crimes – and she pushes them away, but when she sees Valentin, she’s reminded of how she was, and she doesn’t like herself very much. Andre says to be kind to her past self – she’s not the first to take a wrong turn, and give herself credit for choosing a better path. Allow her body and spirit to heal, and she can go back to kicking ass and taking names.  He asks if they’re still friends, and she says of course. They hug good-by. Andre has one last piece of advice for now – steer clear of Valentin.

Laura tells Lulu that the next six months require a staggering amount of self-control. Lulu says when she saw Charlotte, she wanted to run across the room. Laura says she has to play the long game and have patience. Lulu asks what the long game is and how she gets her daughter back. My deduction is going toward she’s the stupidest human on the planet.

Nelle comes in while Nina is on the phone. Nelle asks Charlotte if she can help, and explains the puzzle to her. Nina watches Nelle working with Charlotte and smiles. Nina tells Nelle that Charlotte’s nanny just resigned. (How convenient!) Nelle says that she’s bringing back the dress that Nina gave her for work. Nina tells her to keep it, but she says that she’s no longer working for Carly.

Carly brings up Michael, and how much he cared about Nelle. She asks how could Sonny let her take advantage of their son? He should have said something as soon as he saw she had an agenda. Sonny says that he didn’t want to lose her again.

Tracy says if Hayden loves Finn, she’ll be there whether he wants her there or not. Hayden says she has to trust him enough to let him try. Tracy tells her that hopefully, he’ll be back on staff by the time the next check comes, and telling them how to spend it.

Finn doesn’t remember stashing the vial. The phone rings. A bed is available. They ask for the patient’s name and Finn hesitates.

Nina tells Nelle that she’s surprised, since Carly said she was the best assistant ever. Nelle says it was time they parted ways. Nina gets another call, and Nelle introduces herself to Charlotte.

Lulu asks if it doesn’t drive Laura crazy to watch Valentin trample her. Laura says she’s not in the same position as Lulu. If Valentin commits another crime, she’s in a position to take action.

Valentin rings Anna’s doorbell. He asks if he can come in, and she says what if she says no. he says he could break in like she did, but it would just perpetuate the dance between them, and he wants to end it.

Finn says his patient decided on alternative therapy, but thanks anyway. He apologizes to Roxie, and starts to prepare a shot, but he drops the vial and it breaks.

Sonny says he didn’t want to drive Carly away when she needed him most. He says if it wasn’t for him, she would have pulled the trigger on Olivia-J. She would have done the same for him. He says that’s what they do for each other. She’s told lies too, but she’s still the one he trusts the most. She knows him deep down in his soul, like he knows her. They kiss. He has a silver wedding ring. I never noticed that

Hayden tells herself that she trusts Finn. Tracy doesn’t. Tracy goes to Finn’s room and sees the door open. She goes inside and sees the broken vial on the floor. She wonders what Finn has done.

Laura says if the court believed Valentin was up to no good, it would tip things in Lulu’s favor. She’s suitably placed to get her hands dirty. If things fall out the way she thinks they might, Valentin will get what’s coming to him. Sounds like she’s setting him up. I hope it backfires.

Valentin says no more break-ins, hints, or public disagreements; he wants peace. His wife and daughter are the most important things to him. If she persists, he’ll remove her – for good.

Nina apologizes to Nelle, but Nelle says she’s happy to help. She wonders if she can apply for the nanny position.

Carly tells Sonny that she has to go. She says he was right. They screw up the day to day things. They’re great at the big stuff, and would give their lives for each other, but when it comes to creating a life, they always end up at the same spot. She thinks they should just let it go. Sonny tells her that it’s not going to change, and she says she loves him, and if she hasn’t stopped now, she’s never going to. She leaves.

Tomorrow, Obrecht wonders where Finn is, Anna wants to know the truth, and Nina asks Nelle why she’s not working for Carly anymore.

Vanderpump Rules

Taco Tuesday; Wedding Wednesday. Schwartz and Katie go over things with the wedding planner. They want everything to be casual and fun. Katie claims she feels very calm. She’s marrying her Bubba. Oh, they also had edibles this morning. Schwartz’s mother arrives, and he gives her a Fireball shot. He suggests a wine chaser.

Jax is freaking out because Schwartz’s brothers missed their flight. He spends his interview time trying to figure out which tense of “worse” to use, and ends up saying it just sucks. They had one job, to show up on time. Brittany says her one job is getting everyone to party.

Scheana thinks Shay’s behavior is “off,” and wonders what’s up with him. Everyone goes to the lake with gigantic floaties. Kristen says as many problems as they have with each other, they all love Schwartz and Katie. A bug flies by and Stassi flips out. She doesn’t like bugs or dirt. Tom, who also missed his flight, manages to get there. He apologizes, and says he realized that he forgot his suit when he got to the airport. He’s rented a truck for the fifty cases of Coors Light he picked up. Eww!

Ariana asks what’s going on with Schwartz’s brothers, and Tom tells her that they missed the original flight, and then missed the connecting flight. Ariana thinks it’s possible that they still might get there in time for the rehearsal dinner.

Lisa checks out the ceremony space. A train comes by just a few yards away, and she hopes that doesn’t happen during the service. I would guess the venue knows the train schedule and plans accordingly. She has no direction yet, and needs to talk to Katie and Schwartz. The two of them join Ken and Lisa. Katie goes over the ceremony plans with Lisa while Ken grills Schwartz on how the first night is going to be. Katie gets all teary when Lisa reads what she has so far. We flash back on some of the events leading up to the wedding. Katie says the words Lisa is reading are exactly why they wanted her to officiate.

The others come by to check out the space. In her interview, Brittany tells us about her future wedding plans at a castle in Kentucky. Kristen takes pictures. The planner instructs everyone for the rehearsal. Tom talks about when he, Jax, and Schwartz lived together, and remembers when Schwartz first brought Katie home. Lunch is served. Giggy! Everyone drinks, and Jax says he has a huge crush on Schwartz’s mother. He wants to marry her just so Schwartz has to call him dad.

We flash back on Stassi’s relationship with Katie. Schwartz gives his mom an expensive ring as something to remember the moment by. Stassi’s mother pressures her about the guy she’s seeing. Stassi gives her mother TMI to get her off her back.

The triplets have arrived! Bert, Billy and Brandon. Tom had to dress them, since they basically have no clothing. Tom tells Schwartz that he and Jax want to give him an early wedding gift. The brothers come out one at a time, and Schwartz starts to cry. He says his brain isn’t even processing the moment. Somehow, Katie was able to keep the secret. Tom is thrilled about how happy Schwartz is. Lisa marvels at the identicalness of the triplets. In her interview, she says that it’s buried deep, but she knew there was some good in Jax. Well, Brittany likes him. Jax says his mission was to get Schwartz to cry – mission accomplished.

Shay is fast asleep. More dogs! Lisa tells Stassi how much hope she had for her, and felt she walked away from it. Stassi apologizes for letting Lisa down, and Lisa says maybe she needed to grow up and figure it out for herself. Lisa thinks it takes a big person to admit they’re wrong, and Stassi is glad for the compliment.

Katie goes down Memory Lane with her father. Both of her parents are there, even though they split up years ago. She says they haven’t been together as a family for a while. In her interview, she talks about doing things differently than her parents. Scheana tells Lisa about how she had a Little Mermaid party as a kid and didn’t want to mess up the piñata. They talk about Shay, and Scheana says he’s in a good place and they’ve gotten their couple mojo back. In her interview, Lisa seems a little skeptical, because she never sees Shay.

Piñata time! I’m waiting for the condoms and Ninja Turtle action figures to fall out. The girls work on the piñata, while the guys drink inside. The guys join in on the piñata festivities, It finally breaks, but I can’t tell what was inside, and Schwartz feels that everyone getting along is a good omen of the future. Lisa talks to Katie about the vows. Katie still needs to finish hers. Schwartz joins them. They talk about age, and Lisa is glad for her life experience. Katie says she’s been married thirty years and they should listen to any advice she has. Omg though, Ken is the best! Schwartz says he has no doubts about marrying Katie, and then ruins it by saying she fulfills him. That’s like, you complete me. No, just no. Everyone says good-night.

It’s the morning of the wedding. Ah, to be young and not hungover so much after a night of drinking. The groomsmen go fishing. Schwartz says he’s not ready with his vows yet. Ariana tells him to write it out and not wing it.

Lisa is ironing and Ken watches. She tells him that she hasn’t used an iron since 1986. He wants a picture, and harasses her with his phone. She tells him to bugger off. The bridesmaids get their makeup done. Katie says she’s heard that the wedding day flies by (truth!), and she’s tried to make sure all the bases are covered so she can enjoy herself. Kristen has taken on the job of attending to any last-minute details.

Jax wonders why he has to dress 30-year-old men, and tends to Schwartz’s brothers. Katie’s mother gives her a ring box with a corny sentiment on it. Tom practices tying his bow tie on his leg. He’s brought all kinds of back-up clothing and offers it around, including socks for Schwartz. Jax says two weeks ago, it wasn’t looking good, but now it’s finally happening. Ariana says if they’re still together after all the arguing in Vegas, they should be together for life.

Two hours and counting. Rose petals are scattered. Lisa thinks everything looks lovely, but she’s nervous because it’s somebody else’s day and she doesn’t want to screw it up. Giggy! Lisa instructs the helpers on how to decorate the podium.

Schwartz writes his vows. He says he’s a master procrastinator, but he’s got this. We’ll see. Ohh! Katie has one of those bouquets made out of vintage brooches. I love those! She says everything is perfect…almost. The boning in her dress is painful. She thinks maybe tacos and margaritas the night before wasn’t the best idea.

Ariana has been a bridesmaid a few times, and is enjoying wearing a suit. Tom says love is in the air. Jax says this is it, one vagina for life, but all joking aside, he’s excited for Schwartz.

And now, the dress reveal. No big shock, it’s beautiful. Lace with nude material underneath, and a mermaidish hem. Katie is wearing a sparkly headband that the veil will be attached to.

Fifteen minutes to go time. Giggy! Harrison! Another tiny Pomeranian! Schwartz talks to his dad on the phone, and tells him how much he loves him. Last minute adjustments are done on Katie’s dress, and the veil is attached. Tom thinks Ariana looks great in her suit and he’s right. Lisa takes her place at the podium. Katie’s veil is about a million miles long. The attendants walk down the aisle. The last two carry Schwartz and Katie’s dogs. Dogs! Schwartz wishes he could freeze frame the moment. It’s perfect.

Next time, the season finale, Schwartz and Katie are pronounced husband and wife, the reception happens, Lisa acquires a new bar, and Scheana wants a divorce.

🐮 Okay, going to give Sweet Home Oklahoma a try. It revolves around three women who are close friends. Years ago, I visited a friend in a small town outside of Tulsa and had the best time! I had to laugh about the restaurants – I swear everything was beef with a side of beef. I also got my first taste of Sonic, since we didn’t have them here at that point. One very interesting place I visited was a segregated cemetery. (And yes, that’s the one time I forgot my camera.) I suggested my friend buck the system and get a plot in the non-white section, but she told me that if she did, she might be using it earlier than she wanted to.

Afternote: I wasn’t totally paying attention, but the show might have promise. There’s a French bulldog in it.

👻 Once in a while, I mention a film, and I have to mention Lights Out. As soon as I saw the trailer, I wanted to see this movie. Although not much actually scares me – maybe the morgage payment – I enjoy those creepfests where things pop out at you. This one delivered, although I wasn’t crazy about the end, suddenly presenting me with lofty ideals and self-sacrifice. It was the same way I felt about Mama. Loved it up until the last few minutes. If you want to mix nobility with horror, it had better be damn good. Thirteen Ghosts (2001) worked for me in that department. I have to admit, I’ll probably watch it again, since a large percentage of it gave good scare.