What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
Maxie slaps Nathan. She asks Amy if what she wanted all along was for Maxie to share her husband, and says she can share this with him, and slaps her too.
Felicia tells Bobbie that Nelle’s real name is Janelle, which is why she couldn’t find anything on her. Felicia really needs a new line of work. She stinks at being a detective. She shows Bobbie a newspaper article about Nelle being a suspect in her fiancé’s death.
Dillon wants to know what Nina wants in the photos, but Nelle says she’s at tea with some official who wouldn’t take no for an answer.
The official is Valentin, who thinks champagne is more appropriate.
Carly meets Josslyn at the MetroCourt, and asks Josslyn if Oscar put the smile on her face. Josslyn says they were just texting about school, and Carly tells her to relax; she said Josslyn could see him. Josslyn asks if she’s in trouble, but Carly wants to talk to her about Sonny.
Petro moves to shoot Sam, but Jason intervenes and gets himself shot instead. Max tosses Sonny’s gun to him, and Sonny shoots Petro. Sam tells Jason she loves him, and to stay with her. Well, you shouldn’t have followed him and burst in unannounced then.
Nina tells Valentin that she’s supposed to meet with the Minister of Culture. Valentin says it’s him. He says she stood him up last night, and now’s the time to keep her promise. She says she’s working. She has an answer for him, but the photo shoot is crucial. Valentin doesn’t give a damn, all he can think about is having her in his arms again.
Nelle tells Dillon about some of the things Nina wants in the photos. She mentions Michael, and Dillon grumbles about flying solo. She says Michael had to work too. Dillon thinks it’s convenient that Michael had a business trip in Morocco at the same time. Nelle says she’s not complaining.
Felicia explains to Bobbie that Nelle’s fiancé, Zach, died before the wedding. They went sea kayaking, and a storm came up. They were in separate kayaks, and his capsized. He wasn’t wearing a life vest and drowned. Nelle claimed she tried, but couldn’t get to him in time. Bobbie says it could have been an accident, but Felicia says the police and his family don’t think so.
Nathan shoves Maxie into the room. Amy says she’s so caught up in her own drama, she doesn’t see what’s in front of her. They were having a business meeting. Maxie wonders what business they could have. Amy tells Nathan to let her throw her tantrum, since it’s all she cares about. Maxie asks if Man Landers told Nathan to love the one he’s with. She sees the cutout, and asks what freaky stuff they’re into, but then says she doesn’t want to know. Nathan says they’re not having an affair, but he did lie to her
Josslyn wonders if Carly said she could see Oscar because she wants to get back together with Sonny. Carly says no; she just realized that she can’t keep Josslyn in a cocoon. Josslyn says she’s working on her honesty, and Carly says if she wants Josslyn to be honest, she has to be too. She wants them to move back in with Sonny and Avery.
Max calls for help, while Sonny gets out the first aid kit. He tells Sam to keep Jason awake, and he’ll try to stop the blood.
Valentin toasts to being Nina’s husband again, and never betraying her. She says one toast does not a reconciliation make, no matter how beautiful the setting. He says he’s just showing off, but if she takes him back, he’ll prove he knows what real love is, and how much she means to him.
The jewelry for the shoot is all tangled. Dillon says he has the lighting right, and wonders how long it will take to fix it. Nelle says she’ll get the jewelry straight, and has the assistant get the models. She opens a case that has a gorgeous blue necklace in it – huge blue sapphires, each surrounded by diamonds – and says, wow.
Amy tells Maxie that she didn’t want the secret to ruin Nathan’s marriage. Maxie says it’s her marriage too, and Amy says she’ll butt out. Nathan explains about Chet. Maxie is surprised he’s a veteran, since she thought he’d be with the NFL. Amy tells her how he hurt his knee, and ended up in Afghanistan, where he sustained wounds, and now needs constant medical attention. Maxie says she didn’t know, and Amy says that Chet didn’t want anyone to know. She tells Maxie about how she needed money to keep his medical care going after her mother died. She talks about the Man Landers blog taking off, and how she got Nathan involved. Maxie is like, it’s you???
Carly tells Josslyn that while Sonny had Jax deported, he also got the deportation lifted, and hopes Josslyn can forgive him. She says Avery misses them too, and just wants her family back together. Because Avery is that articulate, even though she’s a toddler. Carly says that’s what she and Sonny want too.
Jason is losing blood. Sonny tells Sam keep talking to him. She tells him the kids need their father, and please open his eyes. He does. We hear the sirens in the distance.
Nathan says that Amy really gives the advice. Amy explains about how she read another blog, and people liked her comments. She started her own blog, and soon people wanted to know who Man Landers was. Nathan says it was supposed to be a one-time thing, but then there was a book deal and podcast. Amy tells Maxie that Nathan has been a champ for her and her brother. He’s not just devoted, but the most honest guy around, and he loves Maxie so much. Nathan asks if it’s going to come between them.
Nina asks Valentin how she can trust him. He says he’ll prove it day by day, over the rest of her life, if she’ll have him. She says she’s made up her mind, and kisses him. I hope that’s a yes. She tells him that she loves him, and wants to be with him. They kiss some more.
Nelle puts the necklace on. Dillon comes in and says, busted, and asks how it feels to have a small fortune of sapphires around her neck. She says she’s taking it off, but he suggests they do test shots. She agrees, but only because she’s willing to go above and beyond to help.
Bobbie asks Felicia why they think Nelle was involved. She says the kayak was missing, and Bobbie wonders if that’s not on the rental company, but Felicia says he owned it, and it was the best. He was the son of wealthy parents, like Michael, and he made Nelle the beneficiary of his will. It was millions.
Josslyn tells Carly that she’s still mad, but doesn’t hate Sonny. She felt terrible, thinking about how good he’s been to her. Carly says he loves her. Josslyn gets he was grieving for Morgan and lashing out; she’s been doing that too, and wants to stop. It’s time for some happiness. Carly agrees, and wants to be a family again.
The paramedics arrive. Sam tells Jason to breathe. The EMTs begin to work on him.
Josslyn wonders how Bobbie will take the news. Carly says she’ll find out soon, since Bobbie asked to meet her. Josslyn says she has to go to the library and work on her syllabus. Carly is like, hmm… and Josslyn says Oscar is on vacation; she can show her pictures. Carly says she’s into believing everyone mode, even Nelle.
The paramedic says that they have to stabilize Jason first. No one cares about Petro, who just lies there. They don’t even check for a pulse. Dante arrives, and Sonny says that Petro tried to kill him, but he shot him dead with a single shot. Dante asks Max what happened, and Sonny says don’t talk without a lawyer, but changes his mind when Dante says it’s off the record. Max explains how Petro got him outside, and said he’d kill him if he didn’t cooperate. Jason is conscious, and Sam tells him to stay with her.
Maxie says she understands. It was sneaky and underhanded, but for good cause. She forgives him, but says he has a lot of explaining to do. Amy is like, I’m outta here. She says if she’s not pressing her luck, maybe Maxie will rethink her plan to unmask Man Landers. Maxie says she will, and Amy says maybe she’s not so snarky after all. Maxie asks if she gave the advice to spice up the marriage to Mac and Felicia, and Amy says that was Nathan; he went rogue during the podcast. She adds that he didn’t suggest getting busy in the bushes though. Maxie asks if it was Nathan who suggested giving up everything for love. Nathan says that was Amy, and Maxie says it was excellent advice. Amy leaves, and Maxie tells Nathan she understands their secrecy, but wonders why he didn’t tell her.
Felicia tells Bobbie that Nelle planned the trip after Zach had signed everything over to her. Bobbie says she’s a manipulator, but that doesn’t make her a killer. Felicia says that Nelle swore she tried to save him, but could barely stay afloat herself, and had left her phone on shore. He disappeared under the waves. His family wanted her brought up on murder charges, but there wasn’t enough evidence. They tied the will up in probate, so she got nothing, and want to see her in prison for life.
Dillon looks at the pictures, and tells Nelle they don’t need models; they should put her on the cover. She tells him to delete them, but he thinks she shows a lot of facets of herself in the pictures. In some she looks like an ice queen, and in others, she looks like she’s a kid playing dress-up. She says that’s what it feels like. She can’t believe it, and wonders whose life she’s living. He wishes he could share her enthusiasm for travel. When he was younger, he was shuttled from country to country, and his mom compensated for her time with material things. Nelle says it’s a matter of perspective. She moved a lot because her father was always in debt. She thinks that’s why she resented Carly at first. To her, Carly had everything, while she had nothing. Dillon says everything comes with a price. Sounds Stephen King-ish.
Valentin tells Nina it was worth the eight-hour flight and the waiting. Nina says she wanted to make sure her eyes were open. She wants to be with him; she misses everything about it. Valentin doesn’t know what would have done if she said no. He’d never love another woman, because no one compares to her. He takes out her ring set, saying that he broke into her office. He puts them back on her finger, and asks her to make him the happiest man in world and not divorce him. She says yes. They both look like they’ve been to the Bahamas; they’re as tan as Sonny. Valentin says he’ll love her always. He picks her up and carries her to the bed, and you guessed it, a song part. Um… Nina, did you forget you’re at work? Yes she did. They get busy.
Dillon tells Nelle that money can’t buy happiness. Ask any Quartermaine. The assistant needs Dillon for something, and Nelle looks at the necklace.
Bobbie hates being the messenger. Carly comes in, and Felicia leaves. Bobbie tells her that Felicia found something, but Carly says she’s done meddling, and everyone is happy. She has something to tell Bobbie about Sonny, but Bobbie says it will have to wait. She’s afraid for Michael. It’s not about meddling; it’s life or death.
Max continues to talk to Dante, and Sonny tells him about how Jason got shot, and that he shot Petro in self-defense. Sam tells Jason that he came back to her once before, so come back again.
Maxie asks why the secrets? Nathan apologizes, saying that the timing never seemed right. He should have just moved to Portland. He’s proud of her devotion to her career and her daughter. Amy is going to have to tell the truth eventually, so he’s moving. Maxie says he could do that, but she won’t be there. She quit her job, and got a one way ticket back. He asks about Georgie, and Maxie says she’ll still see her, and she can find another job, but never another love of her life. They kiss.
Felicia sees Amy, and says she seems calm. She tells Amy that she told Maxie about her and Nathan. Amy says it’s not what she thinks. She isn’t at liberty to say what’s going on, but Maxie accepts it. Felicia is like, what?!
Nina doesn’t want to leave. Her phone rings, and she ignores it, but it rings again. There’s a problem at the photo shoot. The sapphire necklace missing. Oh, come on, Nelle is going to be responsible for the Chicago fire soon.
Dillon looks at the shots. Nelle says she told him to delete them, but he says he’s an artist and never deletes his work. Nelle goes on about what more could she ask for, and how happy she is. She still thinks he should delete the photos though.
Carly asks Bobbie if she’s not exaggerating. Bobbie says she has proof that Nelle is dangerous. Carly says okay, let’s hear it. Bobbie tells her to brace herself.
The EMTs take Jason out to the ambulance, and Sam goes with them. Sonny looks at the blood on the floor.
Tomorrow, Nelle tells Michael that they have to go now, Carly says she’s not losing another son, and Sam tells Monica about Jason.
The Real Housewives of NYC
We start with some talk about body parts, what we do with them, and grooming them. ♫ LA-LA-LA! ♫ Andy asks if the booze made Tinsley open up (omg – and he didn’t even say that on purpose) about a certain sexual act. She explains that she thought it was a cute story. Um… cute is not the adjective I’d ascribe to that. I’m no prude by any stretch of the imagination – I lived in NYC in the 70s and 80s for God’s sake – but there are some things I don’t want to know, and this is most of them. Ramona explains that she grew up Catholic, and didn’t think oral sex was sex. Moving on, but not fast enough.
Andy brings up how Ramona asked Bethenny if her daughter is aware of her nakey past. Which isn’t really very nakey. We flash back to that, and also the argument they had in Vermont. Then the non-invite/invite to Mexico, and wrap it up with the pool apology. Maybe Ramona just shouldn’t drink. A viewer asks why Ramona chose to bring it up after a million years. Ramona says she’d been sent an article mentioning it. We also go back to the first reunion where Ramona walked off when Alex mentioned she’d done art photos. Ramona says she’s not as uptight now. Yeah, we’ve noticed. She says she probably needs delivery lessons, and I second that. She didn’t know how to make it right, and she made it worse. Another viewer asks why Bethenny made a big deal about it. I can answer that. Because Ramona is a huge a-hole and Bethenny had enough. Bethenny says the article was already out there, and she’d even written about it, but Ramona approaching her under the guise of being worried about Brynn finding out, was the wrong thing. Ramona insists it was out of concern, but Bethenny says not one person believes that, nor did any other mother ever voice their “concern.” She’d even said in an interview that she wanted to hurt Bethenny. Ramona says Bethenny makes her nervous. Bethenny says when she was going through a bad personal time, she never came at Ramona, even though Ramona attacked her right and left. Ramona says who can embarrass her anyway? because she’s an insensitive dolt. Ramona says she’s been there for Bethenny, and she owns what she does. Bethenny asks what she’s ever done to Ramona, but Ramona doesn’t answer because there is no answer.
Another viewer wonders why, since Bethenny called LuAnn every name in the book, she wasn’t more forgiving. LuAnn jumps in and says it was about the kids. It gets put out there that maybe Ramona is jealous about Bethenny’s success the way Jill Zarin is. After listing about a thousand ways that Ramona has been obnoxious, if not downright nasty to her, Bethenny says that Ramona can’t be happy for other people, and it shows. Ramona says that Bethenny is projecting, but apparently she doesn’t know what the word means. Bethenny points out that everyone is shaking their heads. LuAnn says the idea is to learn from mistakes and not make them again. Andy asks if the rest of them would be forgiving. LuAnn says it takes a while for the burn to go away. Dorinda tells them that when she watched how angry Ramona was versus Bethenny being quiet, she doesn’t think Ramona realizes how intense she was being. Andy asks if she’d taken anything like Xanax, but Ramona insists she was just drinking. Andy asks why Bethenny ended up inviting her to Mexico. Bethenny says she didn’t want to exclude her. She doesn’t want to be close, but she doesn’t “not not like” her.
We discuss Sonja Morgan’s Home for Wayward It Girls. I note that LuAnn’s necklace looks like the one that’s missing on General Hospital. When was the last time she was in Morocco? We see clips of Tinsley’s new life – fun with Sonja, fun without Sonja, arguments with Sonja, the Page Six debacle, and her eventual move. We also flash back to the thank you party, and that amazing cake. Andy asks about the best and worst of living with Sonja. Tinsley says it was the worst time of her life, and she’ll forever be grateful, but the downside was the criticism. Sonja admits that she should have laid off in front of the other girls, but says then Tinsley aired the dirty laundry. Andy asks LuAnn for her opinion, since she’d also lived with Sonja. LuAnn thinks Sonja was like an overbearing mama and hard on Tinsley. Sonja agrees she was, but thought Tinsley needed guidance. She says that Tinsley falls in love quickly, and she wanted the best for her. She’d said she wanted to get married and have children, so Sonja tried to help. Tinsley says she’s not an intern, but a friend, and had every intention of giving her something when she left. Sonja gripes about not getting a birthday card, reminding me about the card sitting here for someone whose birthday was three days ago.
Andy asks if Sonja went to Page Six about Tinsley being ungrateful, but she insists she didn’t. He asks if Tinsley confirmed it. She says she wouldn’t know how to do that, but Sonja had just been complaining about the exact same thing, and she felt betrayed. Sonja says she didn’t come to her first. Carole says they were the exact words Sonja said. Andy asks if it was a thank you or f-you party, but Tinsley says she planned it before all that happened. Bethenny thinks they should call it a thuck you party. Ha-ha! Sonja says she thought the glitz was just for show, but when Tinsley gave her speech, she knew it was sincere. That five grand gift certificate for Bergdorf’s probably didn’t hurt either. Tinsley is sorry they fought, and admits she wasn’t the perfect house guest, but they’re good now.
We move on to the Mexico trip, and get to relive it through clips. First, the great room hunt by Ramona and Sonja. What a couple of ungrateful idiots. We revisit LuAnn’s fall into the bushes – HAHAHAHAHA! – her subsequent fall (which wasn’t quite as funny), tequila day, Dorinda stabbing herself, and end with the rose and thorn dinner. It’s fun to watch their reactions. It’s so good, we see the clips of LuAnn falling again. Andy says in ten years, he’s never seen her drunk like that. LuAnn says she never gets out of control, but it was a long drinking day and she hadn’t eaten. Andy says Bethenny brought them to the epicenter of alcohol.
Andy asks why Ramona thought she should get the best room, considering how she stood with Bethenny? Ramona doesn’t know what she was thinking. I’m not so sure Ramona does think, and Dorinda reads my mind, saying she wasn’t. Andy brings up Sonja making out with the ladies, and taking it to a new level. Sonja says now that LuAnn is married, she had to find new victims. Carole thinks Sonja might have given her a hickey. Andy asks how Dorinda cut herself, and Bethenny calls her a gangster. Dorinda says she didn’t feel a thing. She saw the blood in the morning, and thought she had her period. Andy asks Bethenny whey she didn’t want to be psychoanalyzed by Dorinda. Bethenny says that Dorinda saying she was controlling was like saying H2O is water.
Bethenny tells Andy that everyone was great on the trip, but she feels self-conscious about her success. She wanted the trip to be perfect, because the main event centered around her business. She says this season was the funniest of all of them. They talk about the pool apology again, and how funny it was that Bethenny and Ramona had barely spoken in weeks, and then ended up hugging nakey, separated by a pool noodle.
Andy asks what everyone’s rose and thorn for the season was. LuAnn’s rose was getting married, and her thorn was hearing all the stuff about Tom, although she appreciates everyone having her back. I cringe again, thinking she would soon be divorcing. Dorinda says that daughter Hannah starting her new life was her rose, and her thorn was arguing with Bethenny. For Tinsley, moving back to NYC and meeting Scott were roses, but fighting with Sonja was pretty thorny. Sonja’s rose was making up with Dorinda (who said there’s always next season), but for her thorn, felt she gave Tinsley too much tough love, and should have backed off. No surprise that Carole’s thorn was the election results, but she had a rose in going to Washington DC for the Women’s March. Ramona has both a rose and thorn in Bethenny, with acting out toward her, then making up with her. Bethenny says her rose was a sense of personal freedom after the Vermont trip, and she didn’t have a thorn. Andy wonders what about her struggle with Ramona, and she says it might have been both, but she had other stuff going on.
We end with a shot of tequila. Toast to strong drink and strong women.
👰 🚫 Next Wednesday, Andy will be interviewing LuAnn one-on-one at 11 pm.
🍴 On MasterChef, the first half was a Mexican-themed tag team challenge, and a mystery box revealing Nutella, with which they made a breakfast. My stomach doesn’t like the idea of Nutella for breakfast, unless it’s spread on toast. Jason won, and got to pick the teams for the tag team. Cate and Dino were the winners there, and Caitlin got sent home. The contestants then went to Big Bear Lake where rainbow trout was featured, and the guests being served were Gordon, Christina, and Aaron. Dino headed up the blue team, and Cate was the red team captain. Note to self: Never put cornmeal on rainbow trout. If nothing else, you will piss off Gordon. The teams picked the one dish they wanted each judge to taste. Christina got some fish bones from the red team, but they still won the challenge. Jeff acted like a huge baby because the red team got to have fun on the water while the blue team awaited their fate. Back at the MasterChef kitchen, the pressure test was to make truffles. The candy kind. Yachecia’s were a mess, prompting Gordon to ask if she’d bitten into one. She was also missing some, although Gordon praised the two that actually looked like truffles. I was pretty sure she was going home, but Daniel had a chunk of chocolate in one of his. Apparently, this is a cardinal sin in truffle-making, and he got the old heave-ho.