December 4, 2017 – The Two Jason Aftermath, Vanderpump Rules Again, Shep Looks for a Mate & Don’t

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Elizabeth tells Franco that something huge has affected all their lives. She doesn’t know how they’ll come back from that.

Josslyn pulls a DNA test out of her bag. Oscar says it will be the longest 48-hours of his life, but she tells him that she’s paying to have it expedited, so it will only be 24-hours. Michael comes by and asks what they’re up to.

Andrew asks Sam where they go from here? She says home, and looks at him like he’s stupid. He says home suddenly seems as unreal as he is.

On the docks, Jason sighs, an art he is perfecting. Alexis approaches him. She was wondering when she’d run into him. He tells her that they’ve finally found proof that he’s the Jason he says he is.

Sam tells Andrew it’s real. Her and him in this room is real. Her arms wrapped around him are real, and her eyes looking into his. It’s because of who he is, not his name. He’s the man she married and loves. They have a family and home. She wants him to tell her he knows it’s real, and he says it’s as real as it gets.

Oscar tells Michael he’s keeping Josslyn company while she does her homework, and Josslyn explains that Carly wanted her where people could keep eye on her. Michael says he just talked to her, and Josslyn asks if she’ll be released soon. He says she’s at the station getting answers about Jason. Oscar wonders if they know who is who yet.

Elizabeth tells Franco she’s proud of him, not just because he dropped the charges, but he helped unravel the mystery of the two Jasons. If he hadn’t told them about there being twins, who knows how long it would have dragged out. He says he told them kicking and screaming, but she says he did it, and that’s what matters. It’s all out in the open. He tells her he can’t say no to her, and she says they can all get on with their lives now. Robin joins them, and asks if there’s proof now. Elizabeth says that they found out Andrew was a Navy SEAL, and had prints on file. Robin says it’s crazy; Jason lost five whole years. Franco says that he’ll live to terrorize another day, and wanders off. Robin asks Elizabeth if they know why, and she says they don’t know the details, but have Andre to thank. He created a memory mapping program with the WSB, but there were ethical concerns, and it never got off the ground. He found another backer, and Elizabeth explains that Andre came to Port Charles to keep an eye on Andrew. Robin says it’s a lot to figure out, and Elizabeth says there will definitely be some serious conversations in the future.  Franco breezes through with a sarcastic remark, and Elizabeth says Robin probably intimidates him; he gets snarky when he’s uncomfortable. She says it goes back to his childhood, and has been an emotional roller coaster. Robin reminds Elizabeth about what happened when she came back, and Patrick was getting married. She says none of it was her fault, and none of this is Jason’s fault.

Sam says, talk to me, Jason, then apologizes. He says it’s okay, it’s only a name, just not his name. He opens his wallet, and takes out his ID, saying he never liked the picture anyway, and throws it on the table. He starts flinging things out of his wallet. Sam tells him to stop pretending it’s not hard. He says he never pretended or lied; it’s very hard.

Jason tells Alexis he needed to think, and asks why she’s there. She says she has no fond memories of the place, and is a glutton for punishment. She asks if Sam knows, and when he says she does, Alexis asks where she is. He tells her that Sam is with his brother. Alexis says she’d be lying if she told him that she wasn’t relieved to hear that.

Michael tells Josslyn that a fingerprint match sealed it. She asks how Sam is, and he says, adjusting. It’s going to be an adjustment period for all of them. Michael admits she’s happy, but still feels bad. Andrew didn’t have the life he thought he had, but at least he can figure it out now. Nelle comes by and asks to borrow Michael.

Nelle tells Michael not to look so happy to see her. He tells her he thought they’d said everything they needed to say. She says that something came up. She ordered a Christmas present before they broke up, and it arrived. He tells her to just return it, but she says it’s for Josslyn.

Robin knows Jason won’t push to see Jake; it’s on Elizabeth. She knows it would be easier to let it lie, but tells her don’t do that. Jake will be lucky to have Jason in his life, no matter the capacity. Elizabeth says Jason hates Franco, and Robin says she can’t argue with that; he’s entitled to. Elizabeth tells her that Jake loves Franco, and so does she. She’s stuck. She can’t explain Franco to Jason, or Jason to Franco. Robin says she had to explain to Patrick why there was a mobster in her life that she trusted and relied on. She understands what it means to Elizabeth, but not why. Jason would never do anything to hurt Jake, physically or emotionally, and would stay away if he thought it was the right thing to do.

Franco goes to Andre’s cell, and asks if he shouldn’t be the one lying down. Andre asks why he’s there, and Franco says he needs a session in the worst way.

Alexis says he didn’t see Sam after he disappeared. She completely shut down until she tried to save him. She put on a wet suit, dove into the water, and looked, but couldn’t find him. He hates that she went through that. Alexis knows, and has done everything to spare her. She tells him to consider this a second chance. Sam survived. She did better, and persevered, putting the darkness and danger behind her. She has a new life; does he understand? A loving, well-adjusted life with her husband and children. She asks him not to make her give that up.

Andrew asks what they should tell Danny. He’s going to be scared of Jason; he’s a stranger. Sam says they’ll figure it out. Andrew asks if she wants him to be there, and she says of course. They’re in this together. He’s her heart, and she loves him.

She tells Michael not to tell Josslyn it’s from her; Carly will freak. Just put it under the tree, and say it’s from Santa. Michael says she’s a big girl, and Nelle is her friend; she should know.

Josslyn tells Oscar that he doesn’t have to do this, but he says, let’s go for it, and does the swab. She knows the chances are minuscule, but if it turns out Andrew is his father, who is he bringing the results to; his mom or his dad?

Elizabeth tells Robin that Jason would never hurt Jake; just the opposite. Robin asks what about Franco, and Elizabeth says he’s living with her. She gets he’s not Robin’s favorite person, and Robin asks if he’s anybody’s, which I think is highly insensitive of Robin, and Elizabeth says, um… hers? She says it seems crazy, but not to her. He makes her laugh, he’s amazing with the boys, and when she’s with him, she feels safe and secure. She’s more herself than she’s been in years; she’s even thinking about art again. He challenges her, and wants more for her because he thinks she deserves it. Robin says she does. Elizabeth says it’s beautiful, uncomplicated, and honest, and he’s her partner in every sense of the word. They’ve created a home together, and she can’t imagine life without him.

Franco tells Andre that he got the painting, but Andre says that’s not all he left. He was hoping Franco did right thing, and Franco says, like he did a couple of weeks ago? He left everyone hanging for years. Andre says look what it got him. Franco asks why not take him down, and Andre says Franco is still his patient. He abused the relationship, but still respects it, and him and Elizabeth. Franco says Elizabeth is super pissed at him. Andre says she has the right to be. He betrayed her trust, and it wasn’t Franco’s mess to clean up. He apologizes for involving Franco, but Franco says he kind of involved himself. Andre says he won’t tell anyone, but Franco asks what’s up with his tone. Andre tells Franco the truth shall set you free. Franco says it landed Andre behind bars. Andre says for the first time he can breathe. No more lies, no more secrets. He asks if it wouldn’t feel good to say the same.

Andrew tells Sam that he sees it every day, especially how she stood by him in the last few weeks. She tells him she wouldn’t say I love you if she didn’t. He says that if she wants to go back, he won’t stand in the way. Sam says that she loved Jason, but that was five years ago. A lot has changed, and she loves him. That’s not going to change.

Alexis tells Jason that she’s not saying it lightly. She knows what he and Sam meant to each other. Sam was devastated when she lost him, but he put her life in danger. She knows he doesn’t mean to hurt her, but did nonetheless. Sam was okay in her life with him, but she’s moved beyond that, and as mom, Alexis is relieved. Sam knows she’s loved, secure, and safe. She understands that Sam thought Andrew was him, but it’s no less real. Jason says he understands. Alexis will never understand why he chooses to do what he does, but knows he loves her daughter. She tells him don’t call, don’t show up, don’t offer to help, don’t ask anything, just don’t. Let Sam go.

Oscar says he’s been so focused on this part, he doesn’t know what comes next. Josslyn says he doesn’t have to. By this time tomorrow, they’ll have an answer. Michael comes back, and says Nelle has something for her, an early Christmas present. Oscar leaves, and Nelle says she hopes she didn’t interrupt. Josslyn says she can always interrupt for a present, but feels badly because she didn’t get anything for Nelle. Nelle says her friendship is all she needs. It’s a personally autographed photo of Shawn Mendes. Josslyn freaks out, and Nelle says she called in a favor. Josslyn hugs Nelle, and thanks her.

Robin tells Elizabeth if Franco makes her happy, it’s good enough for her, and wishes them the best. Now, she has to get back to her husband, kids, work, and life. She say, damn life; always getting in the way. They make small talk, and Elizabeth says life is fabulous, and she thinks it’s about to get even better.

Franco asks if doctor/patient confidentiality still applies. He’s still threatened by Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee. Elizabeth has been in love with both of them, and now they’re rearing their ugly muscled heads. Andre asks if they’re the problem, or is Franco sabotaging his own happiness. Andre believes Franco thinks he doesn’t deserved to be loved, and Franco says maybe he doesn’t. Maybe Jason was right to try and kill him, and maybe Drew would be right too, after he pushed him down the stairs. Andre says he was a child. Franco says two brothers from the same mother want him dead. Andre thinks he’s using it as an excuse to not be honest with Elizabeth. The more he holds it in, the more it eats away at him, and erodes the relationship. Franco asks what if she doesn’t understand or believe him? Andre says if she stops loving him, it’s going to happen anyway if it continues down this path. He tells Franco to learn from his mistake. Tell her the truth and give her a chance to decide. He might be pleasantly surprised. The guard says, time’s up, which is actually funny, since that’s what a shrink always says at the end of a session. They wish each other good luck.

Alexis tells Jason that Sam and Andrew had a child together. Jason says, so do they. Alexis says she’s happy, and that state of being doesn’t come easily to Sam. She says Andrew is a good man, and walked away from Sonny for his family; don’t pull her back into that dark cloud. Jason says he never told her what to do, and he’s not starting now. Alexis hopes Sam is a mature enough mother to know he’s not an option for her. She walks away, and Jason heaves another sigh.

Sam tells Andrew the last five years led her to him, the man she loves. She didn’t fall in love because of his name, but because he’s him, and she couldn’t imagine life without him. Their life is real. Nothing is going to change that. Andrew says it would kill him if he lost her, but she says he didn’t; she’s standing right here. He tells her that he needs to figure out who Andrew Kane is, and she says they’ll do it together. He says it’s a lot. He’ll need to think. He leaves, and she looks at the picture of him in uniform with his old face.

Alexis sees Sam, and tells her she just ran into Jason – the legal one. Sam asks what he said, and she says not much; typical Jason fashion. She knows it’s hard to process, and Sam says it’s a little overwhelming. Alexis knows how much she loves him, and what a huge person he was in her life, but he’s not going to change. They know that’s who he is, and it might work for him, but doesn’t work for her. Alexis tells her to think of her children. Sam asks if Alexis thought about hers when she hooked up with Julian. Valid point. Alexis says if she goes back, she does so knowing what he does and what he’ll do to her children. Sam says she can’t breathe and has to go. She jets.

At the hospital, Franco tells himself, just tell truth. It’s not the end of the world, just his world. He sees Elizabeth, who thought he went home. He says he did, but came back because he needs to tell her something important that possibly might change things. She says she has something too, and tells him, let’s get married.

Andrew is on the bridge. Oscar shows up, and he says, we meet again. Oscar says, sorry, but Andrew says don’t apologize; it’s a good place to think. He asks if Oscar’s mom knows where he is, but then remembers she tracks him on the phone. Oscar says no anymore; he ditched the GPS. Andrew says he understands being impulsive. They place their hands exactly the same way on the railing.

Sam goes to the docks (oh, come on), and sees Jason. They gaze at each other.

Franco is surprised Elizabeth wants to marry him. She says more than anything. He asks, why now, and she says because she’s madly in love with him. She can’t imagine her world without him in it. He says those are good reasons, and he has the same ones. She asks if it’s a yes, and he says a gazillion yeses/ They kiss. She asks what he wanted to tell her, but he says it’s not important. He loves her, and she makes him happy. They kiss again, and he holds her.

Josslyn tells Nelle it’s the best gift ever, and Nelle tells her they’ll have lunch at Kelly’s soon. Michael is taking a call in the hallway, saying to call him back when they have the numbers. Nelle says a CEO’s work is never done, and thanks him for encouraging her to give Josslyn the gift; she had fun watching her open it. Michael says it was a home run, and Nelle says it was nice to put a smile on her face. She leaves, and when she gets to the elevator, takes a Sharpie out of her bag, and clicks it shut. Ooh, I guess she autographed the photo. Slick Nelle.

Josslyn puts the test in the envelope, and says, here goes nothing.

Oscar says he should leave Andrew alone, but Andrew says he doesn’t have to go; there’s plenty of room. They stand exactly the same way, with their arms folded, and I have to laugh. It’s kind of cute actually.

Jason and Sam approach each other. He says, it’s gonna be okay. Whatever happens, it’s all gonna work out. A tear rolls down her cheek. She thanks him, and he walks away. She wipes the tears off her face.

Tomorrow, Olivia wishes Monica could see her as a member of the family, Maxie surprises Amy, and Ned suggests buying out Jason and Drew.

Vanderpump Rules

It’s Scheana’s birthday costume party. Someone says they had sex with Jax. We see everyone’s reactions, and the interviewer asks if he cheated on Brittany.

Things are jumping at SUR. Lisa steals a French fry. Oh, wait. It’s probably pommes frites there. She says the restaurant has really matured in ten years. In his interview, Jax says he and Brittany are doing better since Kentucky. We flash back to the miserable time they had there. He says she stayed for a while, but since then, things have been great. She’s getting off the couch now, and into the gym. Because, God knows, that was the main issue with their relationship. Sighing like Jason on GH.

Scheana says she’s in a good place, and in a new relationship. His name is Rob, and they dated off and on, then she took a six-year break with Shay. We flash back to her telling Shay that she wants a divorce. She says if it was anyone else, she wouldn’t have started dating so quickly. She’s still waiting on the final divorce certificate.

Lisa tells Tom they’re waiting for the paperwork on the bar that she and the Toms are opening. She tells him he has to commit to it. In his interview, he says they want him and Schwartz to invest $100K. He can manage to scrape it together, but they’re not officially partners until he writes her a check.

Scheana tells Ariana to avoid Katie, who’s been rage texting. She took something as an insult that wasn’t meant that way, and they haven’t talked since. Since Katie and Stassi haven’t been in her life, Scheana feels like a weight has lifted. She tells Katie she’s not invited to her birthday party because she doesn’t want drama. This is one of the rudest things I’ve ever seen anyone do, and I’ve seen a lot of rude things. Not inviting someone is fine – it’s your party – but making a point of telling them they’re not invited? No, just no. Katie says one minute she’s a best friend, and the next Scheana hates her. She was a bridesmaid at Katie’s wedding, and made a decision somewhere along the line that they weren’t friends. Scheana tells Katie that her friends don’t speak to her the way Katie does, and Katie says her friends don’t speak about her the way Scheana does. Scheana thinks she’ll need to have the same conversation with Stassi, and Katie says count her out.

Sitting in one of the booths at SUR, Tom tells Ariana that he’s nervous. He thinks Ken and Lisa will just be doing their thing, and put the Toms’ names on it. Ariana says he’s done research. In his interview, Tom tells us about his research trip with Schwartz and Jax, where they looked into a way to incorporate weed into the venue, but found out you can’t legally incorporate it into drinks. He’s afraid that he’s going to get pushed around and told what to do. Tom suddenly realizes that Ken and Lisa are about two tables away. Giggy! In his interview, Tom says he’s positive they’ve heard every word he said. He cuts what he’s saying short. Lisa wonders what’s wrong with him, since they haven’t even started yet. What my father called crying before you’re hurt.

Katie visits Stassi, who recently moved into a new apartment in the same building. It doesn’t have central air-conditioning, and Stassi is tearing open a box with a window unit. She suggests blending some margaritas, since fruit is healthy. Katie tells Stassi about Scheana informing her that she’s not invited to her party. She says it’s fine if Scheana doesn’t want to be friends. Stassi suggests texting her and asking if she’s invited. Ha-ha! I love Stassi’s sense of humor. In her interview, Stassi says Scheana seems to be going out of her way to be an a-hole. She tells Katie that she and Patrick are doing well, and it seems like it’s changed now. Katie hopes so; she doesn’t want to see Stassi go through the pain again. Stassi says it seems like there was a shift. Katie tells us that married life is amazing, and better than dating life. They can plan for the future in a real way, and to the ultimate, final destination they’re both headed for – death.

James and Logan have a drink. Logan is James’s new best mate who he met at PUMP. He tells Logan he’s been kicked out of PUMP six times. He tells Logan that Raquel is coming back for the entire summer, and he’s refurbished accordingly, like getting a new rug that doesn’t have vomit and wine stains on it. Raquel arrives, and James tells Logan to get lost. See you in September, Logan.

Tom and Schwartz go to the TomTom site. Tom wants it to have heart and hand-crafted cocktails. And sexy TVs. Whatever that means. Schwartz thinks Tom’s attention to detail is great, but he becomes hyper-focused on unimportant things. Tom is worried that Ken and Lisa will be doing everything. He tells Schwartz about them overhearing his conversation with Ariana. Schwartz asks if it’s an issue, or should they pretend it didn’t happen. Tom says wait to see if they bring it up.

Ken and Lisa arrive. They talk about the kitchen. Lisa says a lot of work has gone on behind the scenes. It’s going to be romantic industrial, not pretty, but with pretty elements. Tom asks if it’s going to be comfortable, and Ken says yes, explaining the floor plan. Tom is skeptical, and in her interview, Lisa says what were they thinking, doing thirty-three restaurants without Tom’s input? In Tom’s interview, he says he’s investing $100K, so they’ll have to deal with his questions. Both logical comments. Schwartz says they have the experience and are putting in the majority of the of the capital. Lisa says, all of the capital, and tells him that she and Ken had decided to have a quiet drink, and heard Tom saying a lot of negative things. Tom says she purposely hid. He was venting on the assumption that they were alone. Well, of course Lisa can do no wrong, but it sure looked like they’d been there a while, and I think Tom and Ariana sat down without noticing them, so way it goes. Lisa says they’re giving him a leg up because she’s invested in him. She’s giving him an opportunity to shine with his artisan cocktails, and hears negative comments straightaway. Schwartz is concerned that Tom is screwing it up before it starts. Lisa says she’s going to PUMP and rethinking it.

Brittany does a facial mask on Jax. He tells us that they upgraded their housing; it made sense. Brittany thinks they’re going to have fun tonight. They haven’t been out in a while, and they need this. She says dating Jax is confusing, because he has multiple personalities, and it’s hard to know who he really is. She tells him no more mess-ups, and asks if he loves her. He says he does.

Tom sets up a credenza. He tells us that he and Ariana have been together three years. It’s time to take the next step, and buy a credenza together. He tells her about Lisa bringing up the other night, and not being happy. Ariana thinks she shouldn’t be eavesdropping. He had valid concerns. He says she wasn’t sure about moving forward with the bar, and is worried he’s jeopardized it for Schwartz as well. He wonders if he’ll have to be bartender for the rest of his life.

Schwartz tells Katie what ties his outfit together is the mask. He’s wearing a suit with a Jason from Friday the 13th mask. In his interview, he says since they tied the knot, it’s getting better, but he doesn’t want to push it by telling her about Tom jeopardizing their venture. He puts on another mask to show Stassi. She asks if there are any more options, and puts on Jason mask. Ariana asks if he’s excited, and tells him that Scheana has been talking sh*t a lot. Why is he going??? In her interview, Stassi says he has a wife, and should put her first. Exactly. There’s no way in hell my husband would be going to a party I was told I wasn’t invited to. Schwartz says they have enough friends. If they lose one or two, eh.

Jax goes on a beer run. To Schwartz’s apartment. He asks if he can grab a beer, and Schwartz says he never texts; he just comes to the door. Stassi tells them that she’s seeing Patrick again. Schwartz says he got suspicious when she was out of town, and he saw Patrick in her car. Jax asks what Katie and Stassi are doing, and they say getting wasted. Schwartz suggests they put a hex on Scheana, that every time someone takes a picture with her, it’s on her bad side. Stassi tells us that she always photographs at the same angle, and will refuse to take a photo if it isn’t that way. Jax finally leaves after examining every edible thing in their kitchen.

Rob comes to pick up Scheana. In her interview, she says she cleared the apartment of everything Shay. She’s turned his mess of a room into her new bedroom, and the master bedroom into huge walk-in closet. Omg, I did a similar thing in my house. Hers is nicer than mine though, with more expensive clothing. She tells Rob that she pretty much invited whole crew, minus Stassi and Katie; Lala is out of town. Scheana tells him to be prepared for Lisa to grill him. In her interview, she says Rob was the last person she slept with before Shay, and the first person she slept with after Shay. She tells us that everything is bigger and better.

Everyone gets ready. I love Scheana’s mask! It’s a Victorian lace thing. Something like Lady Gaga would wear. Ariana tells Tom that he looks like General George Washington’s gay friend. Ariana tells us that they love costume parties. Tom tells her a buddy ran into Faith at the OK! Magazine party, and she said she’d been sleeping with Jax. Ariana says if it’s true, she’ll kill him. We flash back to Faith, who was a server at SUR, but not an integral part of any story. Not even Housewife “friend” caliber. Ariana tells Tom to talk to Jax, or she’s talking to Brittany. He thinks it’s farfetched, and maybe just a rumor.

The venue is a restaurant called The Guild, and the password is 420. It’s pretty crowded. Kristen and Faith are both there. James feels safe around Jax now, and in his interview, Jax says his opinion has changed. He used to want to bash James’s face in, but now kind of wants to take him under his wing, like a lost puppy. Scheana arrives, totally glam. Jax says Kristen must be excited, since usually crashes a party. In her interview, Kristen thinks Scheana should pump the breaks a little. She’s not looking for boyfriend, but a husband. Tom tells Jax about the candid conversation with Ariana, and how Lisa told him that she needs to think about it now.

Lisa comes in wearing a feathered headdress mask. Scheana introduces her to Rob, and she says he’d better be worthy. She tells Scheana not to minimize marriage. In her interview, she says that Scheana’s feelings aren’t a reliable source. At Katie’s wedding, she said she had butterflies for Shay, and she needs to slow down. Rob promises his phone is off. Jax talks about having kids, and how most of the world thinks he shouldn’t reproduce. I would be in that group. In her interview, Brittany says he knows marriage and kids are in her plan, and he told her family he wants to marry her. We flash back to that. She says they’re going in the right direction.

Stassi says it’s late night done right. She, Katie, and Schwartz are out for a pre-party drink. Stassi went to Bora Bora with them on their honeymoon. In her interview, she says there’s not much to do there, and she made it fun. She’d invite her too. She says she wouldn’t make it a thing not to invite someone to a party, and doesn’t know what went wrong. She feels good about it. She put in the effort, but now she’s free of it. She’s learned her lesson with Scheana. We flash back to their tumultuous relationship. She says time has proven they’re not meant to be friends.

Tom pulls Jax aside. Elsewhere in the room, James asks Faith if she’s okay. Tom tells Jax there’s a rumor about him and Faith. Faith tells James that says Jax told her he’d wanted her for a long time, and it happened so fast. Tom says he heard a rumor that Jax had sex with Faith, but he says he’s past that kind of behavior. Faith tells James she hasn’t had her period. In his interview, James is sure if Faith is pregnant, she’ll keep the baby, and says his head would explode just thinking about a mini Jax running around. Adam tells Brittany there’s a rumor that Jax slept with Faith.

Schwartz tells Brittany if it was true, he would cover, but he hasn’t heard anything about it. Brittany says that she basically can’t believe anybody. In his interview, Schwartz says Jax seems to love her. He doesn’t have his usual side chicks and low-key Tinder accounts. Jax tells Faith to let them know it’s not true. Shades of what he did to Lala. Faith asks if he’s serious. Tom says she went to Adam. She says she knows what she did. Brittany says she’ll go insane, and asks if someone can’t be honest. Adam says he doesn’t want to believe it, but he does. Brittany asks where Jax is. Scheana tells Lisa. In her interview, Brittany says Jax has done a lot of effed-up things, but if this is true, she’ll drop kick both their asses and they’re dead to her. She tells everyone she changed her life for him, and  if he cheated, she’s done.

Brittany approaches Jax. He says he didn’t do it; he’s getting into trouble for nothing, and being set up. He asks why he would hook up with someone in their circle, and we flash back to Kristen. Tom tells Scheana about it. In her interview, Kristen wants to bash his privates in with sledgehammer. She calls him a bunch of names, and tells him to go eff himself. Lisa asks if Brittany is okay, and she says no; it’s not fair. Kristen goes outside, and confronts Faith.

Jax tells Brittany that he didn’t do it. She says if she finds out it’s true, she’s moving out and taking the dogs with her, and he can rot in effing hell.

This season, flipping out, shot skis, twerking, drinking, nakedness, voguing, Stassi’s birthday, Pride Day (there can’t be one without Lisa), Mexico, Harrison! Giggy! Lisa says there are a lot of skanks in this town, Stassi says where there’s smoke there’s fire, Stassi and Patrick break up again, Lisa wants 100% commitment from the Toms, Lala is back, and Lisa asks for Jax’s resignation. Whew!

👱 I checked out RelationShep, and it’s light, but worthy. Cameron thinks it’s time for Shep to grow up. Me too, but I don’t have much hope for that. Shep says he’s unbearably wonderful, and Cameron believes he has the potential to be a catch, but has some things to work on. Shep doesn’t want to wake up 45 and single, so his friends across the country are going to be his matchmakers. It works kind of like The Bachelor, where he goes on dates with them, and then the final picks will go to his hometown to see if they gel. I like Shep, but my jury is out on whether he’s really ready to settle down or not.

😱 Alexis giving Jason a list of what not to do on GH, reminded me of the fake trailer for a fake movie called Don’t in the full version of Quentin Tarantino’s Grindhouse. Be forewarned, it’s gory. Funny, but gory.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=czR4qJbkSuc

Don'tGrindhouse

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