What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
The Real Housewives of Dallas
At her Bubbles and Bru party, Stephanie introduces their favorite ginger family. Brandi takes the mic, and says they’re honored to share the news with all of them about the new baby. Stephanie had everything to do with it, and she loves her. She thanks everyone for being there. LeeAnne is like, what? D’Andra is in total shock, thinking they were getting a divorce. Kameron wonders why they kept it a secret. Brandi asks to talk to LeeAnne in private. In her interview, Brandi says she doesn’t want to live her life fighting over nonsense. She wants LeeAnne to know she’s at a positive place and wants to start fresh. LeeAnne says she felt like they had a friendship, and was devastated. She didn’t know what to expect. At the reunion, Brandi had said she didn’t see a future for them. We flash back to that. She wants find a way to move forward. In her interview, LeeAnne says if Cary is willing to give her a second chance, she should give Brandi one. She tells Brandi they should take the good they had and move forward with it. They hug. Kameron doesn’t know what’s happening. They’re all getting along. Maybe it’s a magical baby, taking all the negativity out of the air.
LeeAnne tells Kameron about her talk with Brandi. Kameron thinks they’re all in a good place, and should go to Beaver Creek in Colorado. Her husband has built a place there. She tells everyone about her idea. In her interview, Brandi says she’s had three hours of sleep since Bruin arrived, and she needs a girls trip.
D’Andra congratulates Brandi. They laugh about how the baby looks like her. Brandi says podcast where S’Andra mentioned Adderall bothered her. She felt attacked. D’Andra says the podcast wasn’t about her, only abuse of the drug in general, but Brandi says D’Andra had been talking about her. In her interview, Cary says D’Andra already told her it was about Brandi, but she’s too chicken sh*t to admit it. D’Andra says that around Dallas, people are taking it like candy. In her interview, D’Andra says she didn’t mention names. She just said Adderall was abused in Dallas. Brandi doesn’t like to be accused of what didn’t do, and says she has a valid source who told her about it. Cary joins them. D’Andra says they’re good. Cary admits to having a conversation with Brandi about it. In her interview, D’Andra affirms she told Cary about Brandi. She says Cary made it worse by telling Brandi. Her issue isn’t with Cary though. She thinks Brandi should have asked her directly, instead of relying on what someone else said. Enjoy your baby and your Adderall. Okay. If she’s so innocent, why would she say it like that? These chicks get mean when they get caught. Brandi isn’t taking it because it’s party time.
Kameron tells Cary that she doesn’t have to be fancy in Colorado. She’s excited about the trip. She sends pajamas to everyone to wear on the private jet. PJs on the pj. Stephanie is also going to Italy, and packing for both trips. She’s doing half the trip to Colorado, and then going to Italy with the family. Brandi talks about D’Andra deflecting and not owning it.
D’Andra isn’t thrilled to go on the trip. She tells Jeremy that obviously Brandi has a problem and is making her look like a bully. This is what happens when you don’t communicate one on one. She says Cary isn’t helping the situation. She’s going to Colorado because she committed to the trip, but she’s not getting pulled into anything.
The Westcott family jet is ready to go. Brandi pops champagne. D’Andra isn’t wearing he PJs. She thinks her butt looks too big in pink stripes, and doesn’t cave to peer pressure when her ass is involved. In her interview, Kameron says she had the monogrammer on call; D’Andra better put them on. She passes out an itinerary, and tells them a private chef is coming. Brandi is going to miss the baby, but looking forward to sleeping in and having some drinks.
They head to Beaver Liquors. It took Kameron a while to get why people laughed about the name. I understand this, since it took me a while to understand why people were up in arms over Brooke Shields’s Calvin Klein ad. I thought she just really liked her jeans. The girls have a laugh over the novelty T-shirts. Brandi gets a naughty poster to hang up at Kameron’s house as a prank. Stephanie says, when you bring immature people to a place called Beaver Liquors, it’s to be expected. D’Andra starts drinking in the store.
No surprise, the house is fabulous. LeeAnne calls it architecturally stunning. It’s like log cabin meets Tudor, and over 11,000 square feet. There’s even a bowling alley. Kameron says, it’s like an adult slumber party. She was the queen of slumber parties as a child, until she got lice from sharing a pillow. The girls compare the elevator to the one in Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory. Cary picks out her favorite toilet for pooping later.
Brandi wants to hang the poster in Kameron’s room. Stephanie wants her to have a god time with them. Brandi thinks every time she plays a prank, the stick in Kameron’s ass comes out a little more. D’Andra says, it’s the calm before the storm, and Kameron wonders what’s going to happen next. In her interview, Stephanie thinks if they bother Kameron enough, she’ll realize they’re fun and it’s okay to be stupid. Kameron finds the poster taped to her bed, and says, this is not okay. It is pretty rude, but not horrible. She comes out saying, what is this? In her interview, she says they want to get a rise out of her to see what she’ll do.
Stephanie asks if she likes it. In her interview, Brandi says Kameron secretly loves her. It’s like flirting when Kameron gives her a hard time. Brandi says Kameron’s liquor store sold it; she’s just honoring them. In her interview, Brandi expected Kameron to be more annoyed. She sees a glimmer of hope. LeeAnne thinks it’s just their sense of humor. D’Andra tells Kameron to act unphased. We flash back to Brandi’s various pranks. D’Andra says there are plenty things to be mad about, but this isn’t one of them. LeeAnne offers to teach Kameron meditation.
Stephanie and Brandi play in the snow, and I’m jealous. Kameron tries to mediate, but keeps laughing. She has a hard time sitting still and taking it seriously. LeeAnne agrees it’s hard not to think about fashion while clearing your mind. Cary brings them (I think) daquiris, and joins in. LeeAnne tells them to focus on breathing. She taps the bowl, and tells them let go of their thoughts. Kameron starts laughing again.
Kameron tells us that house manager Sophia is like Mary Poppins, and found an amazing chef. They sit down to dinner. Stephanie would rather have a conversation with D’Andra one on one, without a lot of opinions. Everyone has something to say about everything. The salad is served, and LeeAnne says, they don’t make this at Costco. Kameron wants them to know she’s fun. She’s brought out a game where you pick a card, and answer the question on it. Everyone is drinking, and LeeAnne just has water, but she says she’s good with that. In her interview, she’s afraid if she drinks too much, she’ll be vulnerable to being offended by stupidity. She’s not interested in opening herself up like that at this point. They do tequila shots, and the chef serves short ribs.
Kameron can’t believe Stephanie has a baby. She says Stephanie didn’t even blink while telling her tall tale. She could have just said she had surprise, instead of making her look like an idiot. Believe me, it’s not her tall tale that did that. In her interview, Kameron says she felt left out. I’m not sure why, since Cary is the only one that knew. Stephanie apologizes. Brandi takes the blame. Cary wants another drink. Kameron says she’s happy for Brandi. She loves games, but it wasn’t the game she wanted to play. In her interview, Cary says arguing with Kameron is frustrating. Her brain goes on repeat. She tells Kameron not to be a badger. Kameron reads from a card, asking, what reveals most about a person’s sexual skills; they way they drink, dance, or kiss? Brandi asks Kameron to kiss her, saying she has the best lips. Kameron says that’s sweet, but no. Brandi says she’s only been with one person. Kameron could be number two.
Brandi comes to Kameron’s side of the table. She says she knows Kameron doesn’t like her. Kameron says they’d just met, and Brandi chased her on the beach with a giant chocolate dildo. We flash back to that. Brandi grabs Kameron, and kisses her. D’Andra asks if Brandi is making up with her, and Brandi says she’ll make out.
They go out to the hot tub. Cary gets nakey. Kameron asks where her bathing suit is. In her interview, Kameron says, first, Brandi wants to make out; then Brandi and Cary get naked. Is she that irresistible? LeeAnne says she’s going to bed early. Too many shots and naked tw*ts spell trouble. In her interview, Cary feels like something is off with LeeAnne. She hopes the meditation helps her behavior. She thinks you can be fun and respectful at the same time.
D’Andra thinks LeeAnne is being reserved, and that she’s had too much to drink. Kameron asks if D’Andra felt left out. Cary thinks it’s stupid. Brandi says if she doesn’t want to explain herself, she’s not attacking anyone. In her interview, Brandi says instead of celebrating, Kameron is making her feel like sh*t because she didn’t tell her. Kameron says she felt like she wasn’t really Brandi’s friend. Stephanie tells Kameron not to bash Brandi about adopting a baby. Kameron says she would never do that, and don’t put words in her mouth. Brandi leaves the room, and Cary follows her. Stephanie tells Kameron to quit making Brandi feel bad because didn’t know.
Brandi cries in the bedroom, and Cary comforts her. Kameron insists that’s not what she said. In her interview, Stephanie says Kameron shouldn’t bash Brandi about adopting a baby, but Kameron heard something different. She wants to live in her world where she’s a victim. In her interview, Kameron says Stephanie is staying in her home and accusing her of bashing Brandi for adopting a baby. Don’t put words in her mouth. Brandi wants to go home. Stephanie joins them. In her interview, Brandi thinks it’s a lot. She doesn’t owe Kameron anything, and didn’t think they were that close.
Kameron doesn’t understand why Stephanie is putting words in her mouth. Cary is right about her brain going on repeat. She was talking about Brandi’s behavior. Stephanie says it’s Kameron’s house, and as a classy woman, she should make Brandi feel comfortable and safe; not having to tell her that she’s sorry all night. Brandi says she has better things to do, like get out of there. Kameron doesn’t want Stephanie in her house right now.
Next time, Kameron wants Stephanie to leave, more fun in the snow, and D’Andra tells LeeAnne to get her act together with Rich.
🍹 The Shahs of Sunset was a repeat of last weeks episode about the passing of Shams.
👯 General Hospital was a rerun today, and ditto through Monday. There will be a new episode of Fear the Walking Dead on Sunday night, but no new episode of The Real Housewives of Orange County on Monday, although Southern Charm Savannah is a new one.
😴 Since it’s doubtful I’ll be posting tomorrow…
👄 Quotes of the Week
Accountability is meaningless unless it’s for everybody. – Stephen Colbert
Does the cheese come out of the cow with the holes? – Barry (Steve Carell), talking to Swiss client, Dinner for Schmucks
You know why God made snakes before lawyers? He needed the practice. – Saul Goodman (Bob Odenkirk), Better Call Saul
It’s like they say. Location, location, koi pond. – Progressive TV commercial
Genius begins great works; labor alone finishes them. – Joseph Joubert
No work is insignificant. All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance, and should be undertaken with painstaking excellence. – Martin Luther King, Jr.
Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard. – Tim Notke
And people should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor, for these are gifts from God. – Ecclesiastes 3:13