September 4, 2018 – Wiley’s Custody is Decided, Veronica Gets a Shock, Ciao Mediterranean & a Scenic Route


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Jason brings Oscar to the hospital. The doctor asks if he’s Oscar’s father, and Jason says, his uncle. His mother is on staff; Kim Nero.

In the park, Josslyn decorates a bench with balloons. She tells Cameron that she can’t believe she and Oscar have been going out for a year. He says that makes two of them. He can’t believe she picked such a romantic spot – a bench. She says it’s their bench. They come there to talk, watch people, and watch the sunset. Cameron doesn’t think watching the sunset is her style, but she says it’s exactly her style. Her dad says that no matter where you are, you can appreciate the sunset. She thinks he could learn from Oscar, but he wonders what Oscar is doing for her.

Jason tells Kim that Oscar collapsed. She runs to the ER room. She asks what happened, but Elizabeth asks her to wait outside. As soon as they know anything, they’ll let her know. She asks Jason what happened, and he tells her they were at Sonny’s, and Oscar just collapsed; it was more like a seizure. He asks if he should call Drew, but she says, no; she’ll do it. She leaves a message for someone to look for Terry, saying it’s urgent.

At the MetroCourt, Drew says he gets that Julian is trying to clean the slate, and he and Oscar’s mom hit it off. Julian says Kim is the best thing that’s happened to him since Alexis. Drew says she’s a great lady. Julian says he can’t argue that she deserves better, but give him chance. Oscar is important to her, so Oscar is important to him too. Drew wonders if Julian is asking him to make things cool between them.

Ryan stands over an unconscious Doc. He almost wants to say he can’t believe Doc let him do that. His problem has always been that’s he’s too trusting, but it’s almost over.

Diane tells the judge that her client won’t be appearing. The judge thought she wanted to regain custody; that’s why he’s there. Diane says upon further consideration, she’s chosen not to appear and cause further emotional distress. The judge wonders if she’s asking for a continuance, but Diane says she’s withdrawing her claim to the child. She’s freely and willingly relinquishing her parental rights to Brad and Lucas. Brad says, it’s over, and Lucas says, thank God, but Brad wonders what’s to stop her from changing mind again. Alexis says he has a valid point; she can still change her mind, making the stability of the baby’s home life in question. Diane says she’s officially relinquishing all parental rights, and giving them his birth certificate as well. Once the declaration is signed the decision is final and irrevocable. Lucas says Wiley will be theirs for good.

Julian tells Drew that Kim was straightforward that Oscar is her first priority. She made it clear that Oscar doesn’t dictate her personal life, but maybe Drew could persuade him to be more accepting. Drew says he can’t do that; it’s up to Oscar. Julian says Drew is the one man Oscar believes in, and it’s clear he would rather see his mother with Drew. Is that what Drew wants too?

Josslyn tells Cameron that Oscar is planning something special; a surprise. Grand gestures have never been a problem. Cameron asks what Oscar has done for her lately. She says she was having the worst day, and he sent her a text. It was complete nonsense, but he knew it would get her out of her mood. Cameron says it seems like knows her well. She says during the earthquake, she almost died and he saved her life. Cameron asks if she’s talking about the time Oscar lured into the freezer and he gave her his jacket? She says she thought Cameron liked him. He says, how could anyone not like him? He’s likeable and nice, like vanilla froyo. She gets that he’s baiting her to defend Oscar, but she’s not falling for it. She tells him to help her, and hands him some rolls of crepe paper. He asks if she’s so special to Oscar, why isn’t he here? She says he’s probably on his way; she texted him. He asks if Oscar texted her back, and she says, not yet, but she knows he didn’t forget.

Kim thanks Jason for getting Oscar there. He’s glad he was there when it happened. She stares at him and says it’s difficult to get used to. When she looks at him, she sees Oscar’s father. When she looks at Drew, she sees a nice stranger, and by some miracle, they have an amazing child. She tears up, and Jason says he’s sorry. She says he has nothing to be sorry for, and he tells her that she’s allowed to be scared. The doctor comes out, and says they’d like to run a CT scan and MRI. The sooner they do the tests, the sooner they can pin down what the problem is. Kim says she’s waiting for word from Oscar’s specialist, but he’d still like to run the tests. She’d like to speak with her son first, and he tells her not to wait too long.

Kim goes into Oscar’s room, and Elizabeth asks if the doctor told her about taking him for a CT scan and MRI. Kim says she doesn’t want to sign the form until she consults with his specialist. She asks if Elizabeth will do her a favor, and see if Terry is still at the hospital. She tells Kim that Terry is one of her oldest friends. She’s also a pediatric oncologist.

Jason asks Elizabeth how Oscar is. She wonders how he’s the one who got Oscar to the hospital. He says they were both at Sonny’s. Oscar was putting together a slideshow for his and Josslyn’s one-year anniversary. She asks if Jason was bonding with his nephew, and he guesses she could call it that. He seems like a nice kid.

Oscar wakes, and Kim asks how he’s feeling. He says, not great; what happened? He was with Jason one minute, then all of s sudden, he got a bad headache. Now he’s there. He says he guesses that’s what he gets for not eating all day, and she says that must be it. He asks how soon he can get out.

Drew tells Julian that he doesn’t even remember when he and Kim were together, and Julian says maybe he wants to get closer, and jog his faulty memory. Drew says, it’s not faulty; it’s gone. He enjoys co-parenting with Kim, but that’s where it ends. Julian is forgetting the most important thing – Kim isn’t interested in him. He has nothing to worry about. Julian says except Oscar wanting his parents back together. Drew says a lot kids want that, and learn to live with it.

Ryan tells Doc the place isn’t bad; three squares a day, and drugs people pay a lot to get on the street. The staff gets heartbroken when they realize they can’t hug the madness out of you though. He tells Doc not to worry about his patients; he’ll take good care of them. He puts Doc into the straitjacket. He says Doc’s patients won’t notice a thing – until they do. Gordon comes to the door and says, Dr. Collins? Ryan says, that’s his name.

Alexis tells Diane that she thinks this is for the best, and Diane concurs. He client didn’t make the decision lightly. Alexis says Brad and Lucas will be wonderful parents, and Diane says her client seems confident of that. Brad wonders what they’re talking about, and Lucas says, lawyer stuff. Brad wants Lucas to promise Wiley won’t be a lawyer, but Lucas can only promise so much. Alexis says after conferring with opposing counsel, they’re going to forgo another hearing to establish custody. Diane says her client has no problem with that. She’s secure in the decision. The judge signs the papers, and tells Brad and Lucas that they’re hereby and in perpetuity, the parents of Wiley Cooper Jones. Lucas says he’s theirs forever, and Alexis says, forever. Lucas and Brad hug.

Lucas wishes he could thank the birth mother. Brad is sure it’s hard enough. He can’t imagine what it’s been like for her. Alexis asks Diane how her client is, and Diane asks, why? Alexis says it’s not easy. To give up a child, demand them back, and give them up a second time hardly ever happens. All Diane knows is that she came into court expecting to fight, but her client said to draw up the permanent custody papers. She doesn’t know what changed her mind, but as her attorney, she respects her client’s decision. Brad and Lucas leave to celebrate at the MetroCourt. Alexis says she’ll meet them there. She asks Diane to please tell her client that the baby couldn’t be in better hands. Diane says if she didn’t think so, it would have been a different proceeding.

Drew says kids learn in life that if you don’t like it, you make the best of it. He just wants Kim and Oscar to be happy. Apparently, Kim is willing to take Julian’s word, but he knows Julian’s history. He made a show about turning his life around before, and they know how that turned out. Julian says he can’t change the past, but he’s committed. Drew says, for Kim’s sake, he hopes Julian is right.

The bench is completely decorated, and Josslyn says, perfect, and thanks Cameron. He says he can keep her company until Romeo gets there. She says he still hasn’t texted, and hopes he’s okay; it’s not like him to go radio silent. Cameron doubts he crashed hand gliding, and his mom a doctor, so he’s never sick. Maybe the day means more to her than it does to Oscar. She says they care about each other. They’ve been through come crazy stuff, and he’s been supportive. Cameron asks if he’s so nice and great and supports her, why isn’t he here? Josslyn says because of her.

Kim comes out, saying Oscar is awake and asking for Jason. Jason goes into Oscar’s room, and Elizabeth asks if Kim wants to talk about it. Kim says, talk about what? Oscar just forgot to eat. She can wish the scans come back clean. Part of her part wants to go through the motions in case there’s been a horrible mistake, and everything will be okay, but it’s not okay, and it’s not going to be. She starts to cry.

Oscar thanks Jason for getting him there, and Jason says Oscar would do the same for him. Oscar thanks him for what he said about Josslyn being with him because she wants to be. He suddenly realizes Josslyn is waiting for him, and he doesn’t want to text or email the video he made. He wants to be with her when she watches it.

Kim asks how Elizabeth knows Terry, and Elizabeth says Terry was her first kiss when she was a boy. Kim says, small world.  Elizabeth says maybe she can help.  Kim thanks her, but says they just need to get through this episode. It’s not the first one. He had them when he was a little boy, but it’s the first time in a long time. She knew this day would come, and needs to get him through this. Elizabeth thinks someone else needs to be there. She should call Drew.

Lucas and Brad order champagne. Alexis comes in, and tells Julian, it’s official; he’s a grandpa. Lucas thanks Alexis, but she says it’s nothing she did. She tells Julian the birth mother didn’t show. She decided Wiley was better off with Brad and Lucas, and relinquished her rights. Julian says that’s wonderful, and congratulates Wiley. On the side, Brad says he doesn’t know what Julian did – and doesn’t want to know – but thanks him. Alexis asks what they’re whispering about, and Brad says he was telling Julian to join in the celebration. Julian says he didn’t want to put Lucas on the spot. Lucas says he didn’t want to jeopardize their chances with the adoption, but now that it’s sorted out, Wiley belongs to all of them.

Ryan calls Gordon dedicated and compassionate, saying, until recently, that was in short supply around there. He was having a conversation with his patient, and knows Gordon means well. Everyone does. Until the new staff came in, it was a bit of a horror movie. Gordon says he heard stories, and Ryan says they’re all true; at least to some degree. Even though the staff changed, the patients are the same – criminally insane, and dangerous, especially this one. Gordon says, he seems so scared, but Ryan says. he’s not afraid of anything; he’s a master manipulator. Everything he does, every word he utters has one purpose – to trap and kill his prey without mercy. When he was a patient elsewhere, he had an occupational therapist who tried to help him. In return, he snapped her neck like a chicken bone. Forewarned is forearmed. He tells Gordon it’s for the safety of everyone. If he gets out, it will rest on Gordon’s shoulders; it’s a lot of responsibility. Gordon says he can handle it. Ryan tells him, whatever the patient says, he’s a natural born killer. Keep the jacket tight. He can’t be too careful.

Josslyn says she can’t say she blames Oscar, but Cameron tells her not to make excuses for him. She says, in the past, he’s made excuses for her. She pushed him away, and made him come back just so she could push him away again. She got mad because he was psychoanalyzing her. It was annoying, but at the same time, he was right. She was freaked out about everything going on with her mom, and took it out on him. Cameron says, and various local retailers. She thought they’d moved past it, but maybe it was wishful thinking. Maybe she can’t take it back. She screwed up. Cameron tells her not to say that. She’s the best.

Elizabeth tells Kim that she’s kept enough secrets from Drew to last two lifetimes. She asks Kim not to shut him out now. Jason returns, and says Oscar really wants out. He wants to see Josslyn. He asks if there’s anything he can do, but Kim says he’s done more than enough. Kim asks Elizabeth to page her if Terry is there, and goes in to see Oscar.

Oscar starts to get up, but Kim says he needs to rest. He says Josslyn is waiting for him; it’s their anniversary. Kim says he’s not walking out, and he thinks it’s unfair to keep him just because he forgot to eat; it’s no big deal. She says she’ll call Josslyn, and tells him to get some sleep. He says he’s not tired, and she tells him that’s what he used to say when he was little, but the next minute, he’d be… She doesn’t finish because Oscar is asleep.

Lucas says, one, two, three, and he and Brad say, our son. He says, it’s finally over. No more looking over their shoulders and waiting for the other shoe to drop. It’s official. He’s all theirs, and nobody can take him away. Brad says, no one. They kiss. Alexis tells Julian that she couldn’t help noticing that he wasn’t all that surprised at the outcome; why is that? He says he didn’t lose hope.

Cameron tells Josslyn that she’s amazing. She says he’s just trying to make her feel better, and he asks if they’ve met. He means it. If this was their bench and it was their big day, he wouldn’t forget for one second. He kisses her.

Doc comes to, and I wonder if they wouldn’t be able to tell someone had hit him. He must have a lump on his head. He says, oh no. He sees Gordon, and says, thank God. He tells Gordon the patient escaped; he’s the real doctor. Gordon says Doc told him that he’d say that, and he said Gordon would have to do this. He takes out a syringe. Doc says, no, and Gordon says he’s just following the doctor’s orders. Doc says he can prove it, but Gordon says, fool me twice, shame on me, and gives Doc a shot.

Ryan walks into GH. A nurse gives him some folders, saying she thought he was at Ferncliff, but they’re glad he’s back. He says, so is he. He strolls down the hallway, and smiles.

On the phone, Drew says he’s on his way right now. Jason asks if Kim called, and Drew says, no; why? He tells Drew that Oscar is in the ER.

Kim tells Elizabeth that Oscar is sleeping. Elizabeth doesn’t want to intrude on whatever is going on, but Kim doesn’t have to handle it by herself. Kim can tell her or tell Drew. Kim asks how she can tell Drew that his son is dying?

Tomorrow, Alexis knows the perfect job for Kristina, Finn tells Chase to stick around, and Anna sees Peter.

The Haves and The Have Nots

When we last left, Hanna had just stabbed Malik.

Hanna runs out the door screaming. She runs to the neighbor’s house, and bangs on the door. Malik stumbles out, and gets in the van. RJ drives away.

Derick hears Hanna screaming. He runs toward the sound, and grabs her in mid-flight. She says a man is in her house. Derrick’s friend stays with Hanna while he goes inside. He sneaks around Hanna’s house, but Malik is long gone. He tells Hanna, who says they need to call the police. He calls and reports a break-in.

Jeffrey goes to the hospital desk, and asks if there’s anything they can give David. The nurse says, not for a few hours, and introduces himself as Madison. Jeffrey asks if it’s visiting hours, and if Madison saw anyone go in. Both are a no. Jeffrey goes back in to find Veronica looking at David. He tells her she needs to get her ass out; he’s not playing. She knows it. The only thing he wants to play with are penises. He tries to get her away from the bed, and she tells him to stop manhandling her. She’s there to see her husband. He says he’s calling security; she’s not supposed to be there. She says he’s her husband of twenty-five years, and asks if Jeffrey is going to stab her again. If he does, he’ll be laid up there too. She tells David that he ruined her life. Jeffrey says he’s asking nicely; please leave. Veronica says he walked out on her for a whore. She’s dead, and Veronica is praying she’s burning in hell. Jeffrey too; he’s a disappointment. He asks her to leave again, but she says she’s not going anywhere.

Veronica pokes David with her bag, and tells him, wake up. Jeffrey tells her to stop, but she whacks David with her bag. She shakes him, saying he ruined her life. Jeffrey picks up the defibrillator, and shocks her on the back. She drops to the floor, and I laugh.

Mitch calls Benny, whose still waiting on Candace at the hotel. Mitch asks if he can get a room. The family is after him. They think Benny did his uncle. He tried to tell them, but they can’t find the guy. Benny has to lay low. Benny thinks there’s someone there that he saw a while ago. He looks like one of them. Mitch tells Benny to ask if his name is Ken. Benny does, but dude says, no. Mitch tells him to get a room and stay in it, or stay in public; it’s that serious. And do not go home.

Veronica lies in a hospital bed, and the doctor asks if she can hear him. The test results are normal, and he asks what happened? She says her son shocked her with the defibrillator. The doctor asks if it was on purpose, and she says she wants him arrested. She tries to get up, but he tells her to lie back down. She repeats that she wants the police called. The doctor tells Madison to call. She says she wants him arrested, and the doctor tells her to stay calm. This is one interesting family dynamic.

Mitch goes to the bar. Don says they’re putting someone in jail, and Mitch says to keep calling. The kid is a good friend of his. Don says they’re working on it. Mitch says Benny isn’t a part of this; he didn’t do nothing. Don says he knows how it is. They call a guy who calls a guy who calls a guy to get to him. Tell his friend to lay low. He adds that Vinnie has a payment coming, and Mitch says Benny never got his truck. He was trying to give the money back when it went down. Don says, with interest. Mitch says, that’s the problem; he doesn’t have it. Don says that’s not going to work, and Mitch asks if they can’t just throw the kid a bone. Don says, it don’t work like that. Mitch knows, but can’t they do it for him? Don asks if Mitch likes the Blacks, and Mitch says Benny is a good guy. Don says Mitch does know he’s Black, right? Mitch repeats, he’s a good guy. Don doesn’t know if he’s seen that before, and Mitch suggests he open his eyes once in a while. Don tells him to watch who he’s talking to, or he’ll be in the same predicament. If Benny has the money and interest, he’ll let him go. If he doesn’t, Don will have to break his legs. Mitch knows how this goes. He shouldn’t have brought him in. Mitch says he’ll go to Grandma Rose (who I saw on a 2 Broke Girls rerun last week – everyone shows up on there eventually).

David asks Jeffrey how his mother is, but Jeffrey doesn’t care; he’s going to kill her. David tells him not to say that; he doesn’t want him to be like her. Jeffrey says he’s not; he’s like David. David doesn’t want him angry. She’s his mother. Jeffrey says she’s an evil sick person, but David says she’s still his mother. He wants Jeffrey to check on her, but he’s staying right there. Madison comes in, and David asks how his ex-wife is. Madison says she’s okay, and asks what happened. Jeffrey says he shot the bitch, but David says, it was an accident. Madison says Jeffrey could have killed her; it’s not a toy. He tells David that he’s giving him someone to help him sleep. David wants to be awake. Madison says he can be awake and in pain, or asleep and happy. David says he needs to be sure she’s not coming back, but Madison says she’s not going anywhere any time soon. He says if Jeffrey claims he did it, he’ll have to get the police involved. Jeffrey says, call them. Madison doesn’t want to, but Jeffrey doesn’t care.

Kathryn’s phone rings. It’s Derrick. He wanted her to know there’s been damage to her condo; just Hanna’s apartment. There was a break-in. Kathryn asks if Hanna is all right, and he says she didn’t want him to call, but she’s fine. Kathryn says she’ll be right there. Jim asks what that was about, and she asks what he’s doing in her bed. He tells her that he’s trying to get some sleep. She says she doesn’t want him near her, and he says that makes two of them. She says there are six bedrooms; find one. She gets up, and his phone rings. It’s Jeffrey. He needs some help. He needs someone to guard his dad. Jim says the FBI should take care of that, but Jeffrey says they can’t. Jim says he’ll make a call. He asks how David is doing, and Jeffrey says, the same. Jim tells him to stay at the hospital until he can get someone there.

Kathryn asks who it was, but Jim says she doesn’t want to know. She tells him to run to his damn whore, and he says he always does. She leaves the room, and he calls someone named Patrick. He knows it’s late, but he needs something done right now.

A big man – who looks amazingly like DJ Khaled, but I can’t find any info that it is him – stands in front of a townhouse. A cop stands nearby, and Justin pulls up. He says, only one? and the cop says he’s been standing in front of the place. He won’t leave or show his ID. The man’s hands are in his pockets, and Justin asks to see his hands. The man punches Justin in the jaw, then kneels with his hands behind his head. Justin says if he wants to go to jail, that’s where he’s going. Justin cuffs him, and puts him in the squad car – without even patting him down – and leaves.

RJ asks if Malik is dead. Yep, looks that way. RJ asks what the plan is, and Candace tells him to check Malik’s pockets. RJ takes out several stacks of bills, and Candace takes it from him. They get out of the van, and she rips a strip off the bottom of her skirt. She asks him for a match, and tells him to go. She sticks one end of the material in the gas tank, and lights it. She and RJ walk away.

Candace says she’s a survivor, and he didn’t see anything. RJ says he sees nothing, and knows nothing. She asks if Gia knew about this, and he says she only knew they were meeting. She says he’s learning, and he says, for real. The van burns behind them. RJ says he’s ready, and Candace says it’s all his; she’s leaving. It’s getting too hot – literally. She has to get away from there. He asks where she’s going, but she doesn’t know. He says he’ll hold it down while she’s gone, and she says he’d better. He wonders if her mother is all right, and Candace says she’s doing better than him, referring to Malik. RJ says, it’s crazy. What does she think happened? She tells him, just walk.

Back at Hannah’s place, she talks to a cop, who tells her that Malik got in through the back window. They’ll dust for prints, and get DNA in the morning. The cop asks if he said anything, and Hanna says he was looking for her daughter, Candace Young. He said she owed him money. The cop asks if she knows where to find her, and she gives him an address. He asks if she can tell him anything else. She says he was wearing a mask, and dressed in all black; that’s all she knows. The cop asks if she’s staying there tonight, and Derrick says he’ll stay with her. The cop tells them to stay out of the kitchen. They’ll be back in the daylight.

When he’s gone, Derrick asks if she’s okay. She says she will be. He’s sorry this happened, and she says, her too. There was only one other time she was scared like that. He asks what happened, and she says she was attacked when she was eighteen; she was raped. He starts to cry, and says he’s so sorry. I’m surprised to find I want to cry. He says she didn’t deserve that, and she says, no one does. He tells her that she doesn’t have to be strong. He’s there; let him help her carry this. She honestly doesn’t know how that’s possible, and he asks if she can try. She can, and thanks him. He says he’s there, and she says he doesn’t have to stay, but he wants to. She says her son will be there, but Derrick says, he’s not there now, and he wants to. She says okay, but she has to call Benny. Derrick says he’ll do it. He offers to call Candace too, but Hanna says, she don’t care nothin’ about nobody. She almost got Hanna and her son killed. The guy wanted his money, and she has no conscience. Hanna doesn’t know what else to do. Derrick says she can always pray, but she says she can’t; not for her. God told her stop praying for Candace. It broke her heart. She knows God honored her prayer, and protected Candace, but she kept doing more and more horrible things. Ever since she stopped, it got worse. Derrick wants to pray right now. Pray that God comes into her life and she repents, and gets a life again. It worked for him. His momma prayed for him. He starts to cy, and says, it was bad. He begins to pray, Heavenly Father, we come to you now, God of all things. We know you can do it all. He breaks down, and Hanna holds him while he cries. This is killing me.

Justin brings big dude into jail, and puts him in the cell with Wyatt. Wyatt says he thought Justin was bringing him something, and Justin says he told Wyatt that he’d do it when he can. Now he has a cellmate. Wyatt asks if big dude can’t be put somewhere else. Justin says he has a propensity for violence, and he thought Wyatt would enjoy him; they’ll make good friends. Wyatt begs Justin to help him, and Justin tells him not to say his name. What is Wyatt going to do for him? Wyatt says he won’t talk to Jeffrey anymore, but Justin doesn’t know if that’s enough. How bad does he want it? He doesn’t think Wyatt is desperate enough yet, but he’ll get there. He says, you like to fight, right? to big dude, and leaves. Wyatt sits and big dude stares at him.

Derrick brings Hanna some tea. She says they’re not supposed to go in the kitchen, but he says he was careful. It will help her calm down. She asks if there’s liquor in it, but he says, no. She’s not sure it can help, but she’ll be fine. She says she needs to call Benny, but Derrick says he’ll handle it; just relax. She asks him to tell Benny to be careful; don’t rush. There’s a knock at the door, and Derrick goes to answer it.

Kathryn comes in, asking if Hanna is okay; Derrick called. Hanna says she’s all right, and Derrick makes himself scarce. Kathryn asks what happened, and Hanna says, Candace. Somebody was looking for the money. They broke in through the window. Hanna says she’ll pay for it, and Kathryn tells her, don’t worry. She just wanted to make sure Hanna wasn’t hurt. Hanna says she’s okay, but she’s not sure what do with her daughter. Kathryn knows the feeling. Hanna says she didn’t have to come, and Kathryn asks if she’s kidding. She rushed right over. She asks what are the police saying?

At the Artisian, Benny gets a call from Mitch. Mitch tells him to stay where he is. They’re coming to get him. Two guys are staring at him from the bar. Benny calls Candace, gets voicemail, and tries again. She answers, still walking with RJ, and he asks where she is. She apologizes, saying she got held up, but she’s on her way; it’s going to take a while. He says he’s been waiting all this time, and they can talk tomorrow. She says she’ll come in the morning, and he tells her to come by mom’s house, and not send him on a wild goose chase.

Derrick goes outside, and calls Benny. Benny asks what he’s doing with Hanna’s phone, and Derrick explains that she wanted him to call; someone broke in. Derrick says she’s fine. She’s lying down, but it took a minute to calm her down. Just come home. Benny leaves the hotel, and the dudes from the bar follow him. This is messed up.

Benny starts to walk faster, then runs. One of the guys tackles him, and they fight, but it’s two against one. Benny puts one guy’s head through a car window, but the other draws a gun and shoots at Benny, who ducks behind a car.

Next time, Jim goes to David for a favor, Veronica tells RJ that she knows everything, Wyatt goes through withdrawal

Below Deck Mediterranean

The two creepiest people in the world, except for Jax, talk on deck. Kasey asks João if she would have been the one he kissed instead of Brooke, if she hadn’t gotten up. He says a million percent, but he doesn’t want to confuse things. She goes to squeeze limes. Which is what we all do in an awkward situation.

Hannah finally got her flights arranged, and tells Conrad it’s her most expensive holiday ever. It cost her $420 just to change them. Conrad says it’s not on him, but she says he canceled; it’s on him. He doesn’t think it should be that much to her, since she makes good money. She says if he was gentleman, he would have offered to pay half. He tells her, keep dreaming, moving him to the creepy team.

The guests have breakfast. The water toys are launched, Conrad tells João that he’ll be glad to get off the boat. João says he dodged a bullet by canceling the trip with Hannah. The guests jet ski and play in the water. Colin puts on a helmet and attempts a backflip, but it looks like how a cartoon character might do a backflip.

Wow (as opposed to João). It’s dinner already. I guess that’s because these guests are pretty boring. The table is done in beautiful blue satiny material with shells, sparkly blue butterflies, and candles. In her interview, Hannah says they’re quiet, but if she was looking at a woman her own age who was banging her dad, she might not have much to say either. Adam explains the appetizer, which is just tomatoes. João and Brooke kiss in the galley. In her interview, Kasey says she doesn’t think he’s changed at all. They’re lying to themselves and each other. She wouldn’t want to be that girl. Which makes her even creepier, since she won’t stop flirting with him.

Hannah calls Brooke to the pantry. Captain Sandy says this is the Hannah she likes. The entrée is swordfish (one of my favorites!) with dill (another favorite!), and tomatoes, which Adam says are the thing around there. The guests pronounce it delicious. The captain tells the crew that the guests are departing at 11 am. The table is cleared. Colin wears one of the butterflies on his head. The guests do the hot tub thing, and have drinks. In his interview, Colin says it kind of rips his heart out that he didn’t tell Brooke how he felt earlier, but she deserves everything she wants. With João, I’d say she deserves what she gets.

The primary’s daughter, Ashley, falls over and says, itsveryhurnmm, and passes out. The other daughter tells her they have to go to bed. Hannah tries to help get Ashley to her feet, and she says more things like, telsfnfhfofphft which loosely translates to, I’m so drunk, I can no longer form real words. In her interview, Hanna says she should feel embarrassed for her, but is actually jealous. She wants to be drunk, wasted, and falling all over the place. By some miracle, they manage to get this chick down the stairs and to bed.

In the morning, Colin asks Jamie if she’s glad it’s the last day. She says she’d like a bed bigger than her pinkie toe. Colin says he’s going to do bed angels.

It’s the last breakfast. Ashley claims she was just tired. Kasey hugs Hannah, and says they made it. Hannah says Kasey knows how to turn on a washing machine, and offers to give her a good reference. The boat heads to Sorrento, and they drop anchor. In her interview, Captain Sandy says the crew started off a two, but finished a ten. She’s proud to call them her crew.

The guests says they couldn’t have asked for better time. The crew does a happy dance as they wave goodbye. Captain Sandy wants to give the boat back in better condition than they received it. They’re heading to Naples. Hannah asks Brooke if she wants to have a glass of wine in the sunshine. They toast to a happy last day. Brooke tells Hannah that she really likes João. Hannah say she’d bet her entire season’s tips on João screwing her over. In her interview, Brooke wishes that Hannah would accept how she feels, and respect her decision. It’s not about her, and as a friend, she should be supportive.

The crew gathers in the mess for the last tip meeting. Adam says it feels like a stage in a break-up. Captain says they won. No one was fired – although a few came close – nobody killed each other – ditto. Some of them knew nothing at the start, but from the food to the table to the service and deck, she’s proud to say she’s their captain. They did an amazing job. Their total was $20K, and for the entire season, they made $143,500. The captain says dinner is on her tonight. In his interview, João says Brooke knows his flaws, and accepts them. It’s brought them closer, and he wants to see where goes.

Time to go out. The crew has champagne on deck, and Colin does a final rap. He raps about each of the crew members, and it’s really cute and clever. In her interview, Captain Sandy says she likes to take the crew out to dinner at the end of the season to show her appreciation, and they can relax together. Conrad wants a night of no arguments and no drama. He tries to sit at the far end of the table, with his buddies around him, but Hannah ends up next to him. Conrad says the last charter was the best one. The crew knew each other by then, and worked smoothly together. The captain asks what his plans are after this, and Brooke says, not Prague. While a few of them chuckle, Hannah doesn’t find it funny, and the table gets very silent. Actually, I don’t find it funny either. I’m not particularly fond of Hannah (I love Kate!), but she got the short end of the stick here, and as a fellow woman (ha-ha!), I support her in this one. And how rude of Brooke was that?

Conrad says he hasn’t decided. Captain Sandy tells them it’s been a pleasure. She says wherever life takes them, she hopes they follow their dreams. In his interview, Adam says Captain Sandy is a special person. He wants to stick with her as long as possible. João apologizes to Conrad. Conrad says he hates confrontation. João says he’ll have less of it now. They bro hug. In his interview, Conrad says he’s learned a lot. He knows his management skills need to grow; João showed him that, and he’s taking the positive from their interactions. Hannah and Jamie sit at a small table. Hannah can’t believe Brooke wants to bring up Prague, when she’s banging the most sexist guy around. Jamie says Hannah never has to see that girl again. Hannah says, it was mean. In her interview, Hannah says Brooke likes to play sweet and innocent, but she feels like she should be reaching for the knife in her back.

João tells Jamie that he enjoyed working with her. She says she feels same. Hannah, not so much. Hannah tries to make a comment about João to Brooke, who says don’t drag her in. Hannah calls João a sexist pig. The others get out to go back to the boat, and Hannah stays behind to talk to Brooke alone. Brooke says Hannah put her in a bad position. On the boat, Conrad grabs his bedding, and dashes off to find somewhere to sleep other than his own bunk. Brooke tells Hannah that everyone else is fine with João. No one else dislikes him. Hannah says Colin and Jamie do. Brooke says he’s intelligent, and he’s had a hard life. Hannah says she’s sick of hearing sh*t about someone who’s said the things he has to her. She tells Brooke, with all due respect, eff off. Brooke says she’s over this. It became a her against him, when that doesn’t have to be case, but Hannah wants it that way. She’s being a bitch.

Adam makes meatballs, and some other yummy looking stuff. Brooke refuses to fall out with Hannah over someone else’s problem. She tells Hannah the Prague comment was just a joke. Hannah says, cool; we’re good, in a tone that says they’re not. Brooke tells her, eff off, slams the door, and stomps off. Kasey and Jamie watch everyone on the monitors. Brooke says Hannah is effing wrong. Conrad sneaks around. His plan is to avoid an argument with Hannah and hide. Jamie and Kasey go to the galley.

Hannah looks for Conrad. Brooke goes to the galley, where everyone is feasting. She tells them about slamming the door, and says she won’t be part of whatever Hannah is dealing out. Kasey leaves. Conrad sets his bed up in the guest cabin. Hannah tries to find out where he is under the guise of wondering if he’s okay. She doesn’t get his location, but she hunts him down.

She asks if he’s not going to give her a hug. We don’t see them – it’s text on the screen while we look at the closed door. She asks if it would bother him if she went to see friend on his yacht after this, totally forgetting that they broke up. João tells Brooke, let’s go to sleep. Hannah asks Conrad, what if the friend wants to screw her? He’s like, what? He suggests they talk in the morning; he’s trying sleep. She asks if he’s really gone six weeks without any sex, and now he’s turning her down. Then she tells him to take her pants off. What the what? I have no clue how we got here.

Everyone tries to get it together and pack. Brooke doesn’t want to be in a sh*t mood with Hannah. She tells Hannah, sorry about the joke. Adam asks Colin if Conrad avoided the dragon, and Colin says the dragon found him. Conrad walks through, and Adam wonders if they ended up snuggling. Colin tells Conrad he needs to think with a different head. Adam and Colin do dragon impressions, although Colin’s is more like a raptor, and it’s too funny. In his interview, Colin says the season opened his eyes, and he learned a lot about the industry, but he still can’t say gnocchi.

Jamie tells João, sorry about the rough patches. Kasey doesn’t know if she likes him or the friendship. She’s the girl behind the seasickness; then the one who lied on her resume. Now she’s being recommended to work anywhere. João says no way he’s ending with Hannah on good terms. They pass each other in a very narrow hallway, and don’t even acknowledge one another.  He can relate to Captain Sandy, and she relates to him. She reminds him of his mom. They hug goodbye, and Captain Sandy says she loves him; he’s amazing. She’d like him to come back as her bosun. I assume she means in another season, and not another life. In his interview, João says he was a big fish in a small pond, who managed to work his way up. Brooke wants to make sure, on a personal level, she and Hannah are friends. Hannah says, sure, and she hopes things work out with João. In her interview, Brooke says she’s willing to try being friends if Hannah is. João says he never expected to leave for Florence with the potential girl of his dreams. Brooke broke down walls, and he was more vulnerable and open. He might not tell her how he feels, but hopes she knows. It might help if he stops flirting with other girls right in front of her. Not in front of her would be good too. Brooke knows he’s not perfect, but keeps hoping for the fairy tale. Good luck with that.

Adam thinks at thirty-three with ten years in the business, it’s easy to want to quit. This season made him love yachting again, and made him want to be a better chef. Captain Sandy is a badass captain, and he’s a badass chef. He went beyond.

Hannah and Conrad are the last ones left. She guesses they don’t work as a couple. He says, if it happens, it happens, but he’s not chasing it. She thinks she shouldn’t date someone she’s together with 24/7. In her interview, Hannah says she learns something every season. Last season, it was don’t play with the guests. This year, it was don’t play with the crew. She’ll have to learn something different next year – don’t play with herself. She can’t stop laughing at her own joke, although it is pretty funny. Conrad says he’s never dating on a yacht again. It was drama he never wanted and never wants again. In her interview, Captain Sandy says she saw glimpses of a great bosun, but he was lost in love. If he keeps his head in the game, he has the opportunity to advance. Conrad says he never wants to be that person who never sees their family, and needs to know when enough is enough. Hannah says she’s learned that maybe she should let her insecurities tarnish a potential good thing.

In her interview, Captain Sandy says she’d give Hannah every ounce of her energy if she stayed on track. But in the end, how can you complain, sitting on super yacht in the Mediterranean? Hannah thinks the captain saw that she worked as hard as she could. Now she’s taking her tips, and spending them on therapy.

Next time, the Reunion – the cheap type reunion in the Clubhouse. On Below Deck the original, the yacht is going to Tahiti. Kate tells us, fire dancing and flower crowns – we’re not in the Caribbean anymore. I can’t wait to see Kate and Captain Lee again!

🚤 Goodbye to the Med…

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