March 13, 2019 – Doc Explains How Ryan Got to Ferncliff, Dorinda Refuses To Make It Nice With LuAnn, a Definite Return, a Possible Return & Thursday Views


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)



General Hospital

Jason finds Sam at his place. She hopes he doesn’t mind that she let herself. He says, not at all, and they kiss.

Harmony says Shiloh outdid himself. Everyone was enraptured by him. He says, his message, but she insists it was the way he delivered his speech. He’s a force of nature. He’s glad she made it down from Beechers Corners. She says she’s reinvigorated being with him. It confirmed her suspicion that she belongs there with him. Shiloh says they’ve had this discussion many times. She says he doesn’t want her to move to Port Charles. Why? Because he’s obsessed with Sam?

Kristina plays Shiloh’s speech for Valerie at Charlie’s. He says, the message is simple. They can end hunger, homelessness, and together, make the world a better place. Kristina asks, how amazing is he? Valerie says, he’s a good public speaker, and Kristina asks if she wasn’t inspired. He reached out to the lost souls, and it reminded who was before DOD. She almost doesn’t remember her. Valerie says, her neither. Kristina says DOD brought her peace, and she can accomplish anything. Valerie says, she guesses, and Kristina says she could show more enthusiasm. Valerie tells her that she doesn’t see what Kristina does in Shiloh or DOD.

Amy helps Franco back to his room after physical therapy. He says, what’s a little searing pain? and she tells him, stay strong, and he’ll be walking normally in no time. He guesses he shouldn’t complain. He’s alive. He’s a lucky guy. Amy says he is. They’ve been working overtime, keeping the reporters out. Epiphany gave them a strong talking to. He’s a hero. He’s not sure his wife agrees.

Cameron arrives at the hospital. Elizabeth says she was so worried. Cameron says his bus just got in. She’s glad he’s safe now. He asks how bad his punishment is going to be, and she says he’s not the one who disappointed her. Honestly, what’s wrong with this woman?

Amy says she’ll be back to check on Franco. He tells her, bring a top hat to go with the cane. He’s going to be doing high kicks. She says, no pressure.

Ava asks Amy for help; she’s looking for Doc. She knows he’s a patient there, and she needs to see him. Amy doesn’t think he’s in his room at the moment, and Ava says she’ll find him herself. Franco calls to her, and says come wait with him in his room. She asks, why? So he can kill her too? She’s obviously drunk, and says she knows he’s got to be pleased, pinning the murders on Doc. She knows he killed Kiki, not the man she loves.

Laura goes to Doc’s room. They hug, and he asks if she’s all right. She says she’s fine, and he says that’s the face he’s been missing. The face he conjured up every night. She inspired him to survive. Now that he can actually see her, he feels like he’s falling in love again.

Sam asks where Jason was. He said he was with Carly, then she got radio silence. He says he texted her, but she tells him that he didn’t say where he was. Did it have anything to do with Ryan? He says, a lot. For starters, Carly’s neighbor at Ferncliff was Ryan at first. Then, he switched places with Doc. Carly asked too many questions, so he stuck her in the trunk of his car, and tried to elope with Ava. He left Carly down an embankment to freeze. She was on the verge of dying when he found her, but she’s okay. Sam says, it’s all over the media that Ryan is dead. Jason says he jumped off a bridge into the river. Sam tells him that she thinks things with Kristina are getting worse.

Valerie tells Kristina that she doesn’t get why Kristina thinks it’s groundbreaking. It’s not like he’s the only person who’s taught people to better themselves. What an ego. He’s all Kristina talks about. Kristina says he’s the least self-centered person she knows, and gives to everyone equally. Valerie says she’ll take Kristina’s word for it. Kristina asks where the negativity is coming from, and Valerie says she’s had an intense work week, and thought she’d spend time with her friend. Kristina says they’re doing that now, but Valerie says she’s talking about Shiloh and DOD. Kristina says she didn’t force Valerie to come to the rally. Valerie says she felt like it was the only place she could see Kristina. She’s losing her friend, and she doesn’t want that to happen.

Elizabeth tells Cameron, lying is never acceptable. Cameron says he can’t believe the man he ran into was Ryan Chamberlain, the serial killer. She says if hadn’t told her, Carly would never have been rescued, but he says, Franco deserves the credit.

Franco tells Ava that he could never do that. It was Ryan Chamberlain. Ava says, he’s been dead for years. This is just a bizarre mix-up. Doc is not a killer. They love each other, and have a future. He says he’s sorry, and she says she’s sorry for him. He doesn’t have the love and devotion they have. He says she’s drunk, and not making sense. She says he’s the one who confessed; boasted about murdering people. Franco says Jordan was using him as bait. It was all lies. The confession and the interview were the only way to get justice for Kiki.

Doc thanks Laura for bringing a change of clothes. She says it’s so good to see him up and around, and he says it’s good to see her at all. He feels like he’s getting back to himself. She says the doctor said she can take him home. He says it’s what he’s been dreaming about; seeing her and getting his life back. Laura says the sooner they put this behind them, the better. He says he’s been following the news, and they still haven’t found Ryan. Laura says, not yet. He says she was there. Does she think he’s dead? She says, the cop said he didn’t think it was possible for him to survive, but Doc says, they’ve been wrong before. She says, even if he survived the jump, the water was almost freezing, and the river ran to the Falls, but Doc says, until they recover the body, they can’t be absolutely sure he’s dead. Doc says he’s so sorry, but she tells him, don’t apologize. It’s not his fault. One thing she doesn’t understand though, is how Ryan got into Ferncliff. Where did Doc find him?

Doc tells Laura that he got a call from someone who claimed to work for the DVX. They said an operative had become problematic. Their mental illness made them useless. They wouldn’t identify the operative, but said if no one took him, they’d kill him. He couldn’t let this unknown person be murdered, so he agreed to meet. He should have contacted Robert or Anna. Laura says, hindsight is 20/20. He says he went to the meeting, and found his brother. He was disassociated from reality; howling. He tried to help him. He got him on meds, and he could communicate. Doc was helping him, but wanted to know what happened. Where he’d been after crawling out of the explosion over twenty years ago. Laura wonders if he killed anyone then.

Cameron tells Elizabeth that he freaked out about Franco. He was afraid of what he might do to their family. He didn’t want to see her hurt, or Aiden bulled, or Jake to revert to how he was before therapy with Franco. She understands that he just wanted to protect them, but he doesn’t have to protect the from Franco. Cameron says her faith has been rewarded. It must feel good knowing she was right.

Franco says before Ryan tried to kill him, he confessed. Before he tried to kill Carly, and took Ava off the bridge. Ava says he was wounded and disoriented. Franco says he wanted her dead. If Jason hadn’t saved the day – again – that’s where she’d be. She says, maybe it would be better than this, trying to sort through it. Every moment they spent was a lie. Knowing she was never with Doc, just his lunatic brother, a murderer. The first time they were together was like an hour or two after… On Thanksgiving, he came to her place. He was so sweet, romantic. He swept her off her feet. He was kissing her, had his hands on her, and he’d just come from killing her daughter. She cries.

Jason asks, what happened with Kristina? and Sam says Daisy came to visit her. She wanted Sam’s forgiveness; she thinks to get back into Shiloh’s good graces. She felt sorry for Daisy, trying to make amends, even cleaning the toys. She seemed scared, scattered, and was flustered putting the toys away. Her shirt came up, and Sam noticed a strange tattoo. She asked what it was about, and Daisy practically ran. Jason asks if she thinks it has to do with DOD, and Sam says she’d put money on it.

Shiloh tells Harmony that he’s not obsessed. She says, so his reason for keeping her away has nothing to do with Sam? Is he sure? He tells her to concentrate on her work. The numbers have nosedived in the past couple of months. She asks if she’s there for a performance review, and for him to scold her about money. What’s going on? Tell her. She sometimes doesn’t recognize him, and asks, what happened to the man who professed his love? The man she did this for. She lifts her shirt, and has the same tramp stamp that Daisy does.

Sam tells Jason that she’s never seen a symbol like that. Jason asks, what does she think it means?

Kristina asks why Valerie is putting her on the defensive. Valerie says maybe Kristina knows she’s right. She’s a cop, and knows a scam when she sees one. If something is too good to be true, it usually is, especially when money is involved. Has he asked for donations from her? Kristina says that’s none of her business, and Valerie tells her, open her eyes. She’s an heiress. No one knows how much money her father has, but Shiloh will find out. Kristina feels attacked, and calls Valerie blind. She says Shiloh is just trying to help people. Valerie says Kristina refuses to see what’s in front of her. He’s a con artist. Kristina says she’s wrong, and Valerie says she’s done. Kristina tells her to wait, but Valerie says she’s seen enough.

Jason asks if Daisy said anything, and Sam says she claimed she couldn’t remember where she saw it. Sam told her that she thought it was cool, but she couldn’t get out any faster. Kristina also borrowed money from Michael to do seminars with Shiloh. Jason asks if he knew the money was for DOD, but Sam thinks he just assumed it was for PCU. Jason says, now she’s hiding things? Sam says Kristine Insists it’s a loan, and she’s paying it back, but what concerns her is Kristina getting deeper into the organization.

Shiloh says his love for Harmony has gone nowhere. It’s gotten stronger. It’s past the physical, and into the spiritual, which transcends jealousy. She says she’s always shared him, but it’s hard. He says he offers himself to anyone looking for the light. If she has issues, look inside herself, and find peace He tells her, continue her work at Beechers Corners. She says he should be proud of his work at the rally. Shiloh asks if Harmony has heard from her.

Cameron tells Elizabeth that he missed his community service. Elizabeth says it’s a problem, but they’ll deal with it. He says Judge Carson didn’t want to see him for a year. What if this messed with his probation? He could end up in juvie.

Franco tells Ava, have a seat, and she kicks the chair across the room. Amy comes in, and Ava says, get out. Franco says he’s got it; it’s fine. He gives Ava some water, and she drinks. He asks if she wants to talk to him a little bit. He can listen; it might make her feel better. She says, what’s the use? The universe always finds the depths of hell to drag her in. Doc, Ryan, whoever the hell he is, called her goddess. He worshiped her. He didn’t judge her, and told her it was okay to explore her anger and desire for revenge. He was so nice to her. He got her back on her feet, and helped her though her grief, when he was the person responsible for it. His love gave her hope. Her first fiancé. She prays he’s still alive. Franco asks if it’s because she forgives him, and she says, of course not. She hopes Ryan is alive so she can kill him.

Doc tells Laura, when Ryan fled the country without any income, he reached out to the DVX, and offered his services. Laura asks, as what? and Doc says their father was a renowned mathematician and spy. The DVX probably assumed Ryan had similar talents, so they took him. He performed special projects. Doc doesn’t know what they entailed, but by this time, he’d become more of a burden than an asset. She says, so they contacted him? He says he couldn’t abandon Ryan. Despite the pain he caused, Ryan was still his brother and he wanted to help him. Even Ryan said it was a waste of time; he never believed anything was wrong with him. Then Ryan got the better of him, and he paid the price. He was left to rot in Ferncliff while Ryan pretend be him. Laura says it breaks her heart. She should have known. She’s sorry. He says the only one to blame is him. He knows better than anyone not to trust his brother. Still, after working all those months with him, he let Ryan lull him into complacency. Laura asks what he means. When did he find out Ryan was alive? Doc says, May of 2018.

Sam tells Jason, prepare to be enlightened, and plays Shiloh’s speech. He says he’s here for them, his special people. The meeting costs nothing but their time. If they improve themselves, they improve the world. Sam says, tell her he’s not convincing. Jason guesses he is. She says, maybe not to him. He knows who Shiloh is, and how he preys on the most vulnerable. Jason says, there’s clearly a pattern. Sam says, it’s time to stop dancing around what’s going on, and call DOD what it is; a cult.

Harmony asks what difference it makes where she is; he has Sam. Shiloh thought Harmony would locate her by now. Harmony says she’s trying, but it’s not easy. Shiloh says, find her and he’ll consider relocating Harmony there with him. She says she’ll do her best. He tells her, make him proud, and she leaves.

Franco tells Ava, killing Ryan would be satisfying, but he’s already dead. She says, they haven’t found his body, but Franco says, no way he survived the fall. Ava hopes he did. She’s not done with him yet. She want him to look her in the eye, and tell her why he did it. She wants to know why he took Kiki from them.

Laura says, so Ryan was Doc’s own secret project. What about when he visited her in Paris? He was working with Ryan all that time? Why not tell her? He says he didn’t know how to tell her that his serial killer brother was alive, and he was treating him. It sounds stupid now. He’d hoped by the time she came home, he would have made sufficient progress, and could bring in the authorities. She says he could have turned Ryan in, and he would have gotten medical attention. He left everyone in the dark. Doc says Ryan was under lock and key with maximum security measures. He couldn’t imagine Ryan escaping. Laura says, but he did, and killed three people. He almost killed her daughter. None of it had to happen if Doc had turned him over to the authorities.

Sam reads that the followers are made to feel special and needed. They’re reeled in with the promise of success, and friendship. Jason says, Kristina goes on and on about how they’re like a family. Sam continues, the followers who disagree are shunned, psychologically and spiritually, and told they’re incapable of grasping the concerns of the group. She says, sounds like Daisy. Jason reads that sometimes they’re deprived of food, or isolated from their friends and family. Once they’re in the web, it’s nearly impossible to extract them from it.

Kristina arrives at DOD. Shiloh says he was watching the video, and she did an amazing job. She says, it was easy. She had an incredible speech to work with. She says he’s too kind, but he says she’s good at what she does. She says her phone is blowing up. Everyone is interested in DOD. He says it’s a credit to her. She says all she did was pass out flyers, but he says, more than that. He saw her speaking to the newcomers. Some of them were hesitant, but her warmth and heart brought them in. He thinks she might be a candidate for his Circle of Trust, those closest to him who understand what they’re doing at DOD. Does she think she’d be interested? She says if he thinks she’s ready. He says, it’s too soon say, but she’s on the right path – for the most part. She asks if she did something wrong, and he asks if something happened with her friend Valerie, the cop? She seemed bored; put off even. Kristina says Valerie is upset with her and DOD. Shiloh nods.

Franco tells Ava that he understands revenge, but there’s none to take. Ryan is dead. She says, maybe he is, maybe he isn’t. She tells Franco that he can’t be a part of this. He was so close to getting everything he wanted. Beautiful, kind Elizabeth, and her three wonderful boys; a real family. She has nothing, not even dignity. Ryan took it from her. She’ll be the one to give him his punishment. She’ll honor Kiki’s memory for both of them. Elizabeth and Cameron come in. Elizabeth asks how Ava is. She can’t imagine what Ava is going through. Ava says it’s pretty bad, but talking with Elizabeth’s husband helped her. She’ll leave them to it.

Franco and Elizabeth look at each other. She tells Franco, Cameron has something to say. Cameron says he wants to apologize for thinking the worst. Franco says he should have been more transparent. The commissioner swore him to secrecy, telling him the only way to flush out the killer was to keep quiet. Cameron says he read all about it. Franco is being called a hero. What did I say?

Laura cries, and Doc says he wanted to be able to treat Ryan, so he could so face his demons. He knew Ryan would spend the rest of his life in prison, but there was just a small chance at redemption. Maybe he would find a way use his talents constructively. Laura asks what was he thinking? and he says, there’s nothing in his life he regrets more. He was in a room at Ferncliff for months, terrified; wondering what Ryan was doing, who he was hurting, who he was killing. All because of his terrible mistake. Laura nods, and says, terrible.

Laura doesn’t know how to process it; there’s a lot. Doc says he’s so sorry for keeping Ryan secret. She says his secret had devastating consequences. People suffered, people died because of his misguided loyalty to his brother. She understands him wanting to help or not wanting give up hope that one day Ryan could be normal, but she can’t understand why he couldn’t talk to her about it. She walks out. So much for Doc’s homecoming.

Jason asks Sam what they’re going to do about Kristina. Sam says, the same. She’ll get closer to Shiloh, and be keeping an eye on Kristina. Jason asks what about confronting Kristina with what they know? but Sam says, not until they have tangible evidence. Jason says maybe figuring out Daisy’s tattoo will lead somewhere. Sam says, hopefully. Before Kristina pushes away from her family and friends.

Shiloh asks if Kristina wants to be surrounded by negativity, resentment, and criticism because of her own insecurities. If she wants to move forward, she needs to choose.

Cameron tells Franco he was reading about how dangerous it was. Franco got past Ryan, and survived. He made it out alive. Franco says he had to. He has a lot to live for.

Doc come out, and asks Amy if she’s seen Laura. Amy says she’ll let him know if she does. Ava sees him, and says, Kevin?

Tomorrow, Anna wonders which memories are hers; Kristina says if her family can’t respect her choices in life, they don’t need to be in it; and Ava slaps Doc.

The Real Housewives of New York City

In Southampton, Ramona helps Dorinda with her luggage. Tinsley and Sonja arrive a few minutes later. Sonja says Tinsley is a good driver, who knew? For some reason she also thinks this will make Tinsley a good mother. Dorinda has brought mermaid outfits for everyone. She wants to do more fun-hearted (is that a word?) stuff. All they do is go out to eat and drink, and she wants to do something silly. They’re doing a mermaid photo shoot. Ooh, those are really cute! Sparkly tails with shell bras, and a floral headband.

Bethenny asks LuAnn about dating. LuAnn says, the best guys are in AA, and Barbara wants to go. She hasn’t had a relationship in a few years. She thinks she’s a great catch, but when men see her on the job site, they think it’s a lot. LuAnn wants to see Sonja.

Dorinda thinks it might just be the four of them for dinner. Ramona extended an invite to the others, but hasn’t heard back. In her interview, Ramona says it’s no surprise not to hear from Bethenny. She isn’t close to anyone, but is close to LuAnn by default. LuAnn calls Sonja. She’s surprised Sonja isn’t staying with her, and calls her a traitor. Jokingly… I think. She asks if they’re going to dinner tonight. Sonja can’t wait. LuAnn is having a dinner for those who supported her. Barbara tells Sonja that she’s having a clambake tomorrow, and Sonja immediately blabs to the others, inviting them. In Barbara’s interview, she says she’s already worried about Dorinda coming, and now she has to worry about Ramona. LuAnn doesn’t want to be around Ramona, who lies about her. We flash back to Ramona gossiping at the Reunion about seeing LuAnn cavorting at a hotel, and being asked to leave somebody’s party. LuAnn says it’s damaging to how she feels about herself. Being around Ramona makes her want to have a cocktail. I can’t say I blame her one bit. It would make me want a whole lot of cocktails.

In Ramona’s interview, she says LuAnn and Bethenny obviously have issues with her, but she’s not concerned about what others think. She’s just doing her. Sonja comes out in her mermaid outfit, and goes down the stairs on her butt. Ramona tries walking down the conventional way, and it takes forever. The others are outside taking pictures already. Sonja says the cutest mermaid is Tinsley, but she knows Tinsley will complain about how she looks. Ramona says she’ll go in the deep end of the pool with her noodle now, since she’s taken swimming lessons.

LuAnn and Barbara arrive at Almond. Sonja shows up next, and Barbara is excited to see her. In her interview, Sonja says they’ve known each other forever, and travel in the same circles. Sonja tells Barbara that Dorinda isn’t drinking.

Ramona, Tinsley, and Dorinda eat across the street. Ramona says she’s hitting the bar, and then coming back.

Barbara thinks it’s great that Dorinda isn’t drinking. They hope Dorinda and LuAnn can be together again. Sonja says she’s coming to Barbara’s party, but Barbara says LuAnn is in a vulnerable state, and doesn’t want to be around Ramona. Sonja asks what she should tell her hostess, who’s excited to come. In Barbara’s interview, she feels bad. She’s in an awkward position, but doesn’t want people to come who make LuAnn uncomfortable. She suggests Sonja ask Dorinda to call or text LuAnn. Bethenny joins them. It was hard for her to get out of the car. She was afraid she’d run into someone who would say something about Dennis, and she doesn’t want to live in the crying. Ann, another friend of LuAnn’s, sits down with them. LuAnn says it’s great to have friends who are being supportive. They toast with water.

Ramona comes back to the table, saying, they won’t believe it; you can’t make this sh*t up. She was chatting and flirting with a bunch guys, and found out they were gay. Imagine that. Gay guys in the Hamptons. She says her gaydar must be off. She just wants a nice relationship, but all the men are forty. The last guy wanted a child. She wants a new chapter. I’m wondering how you can leave your friends for a drink and flirting session before dinner. Desperate much?

LuAnn thanks them for everything. In retrospect, she’s glad she didn’t get the mega mansion. In Bethenny’s interview, she says by intervention weekend, LuAnn was making irrational financial decisions. She wanted a $6 million mansion in upstate New York. Who does that? LuAnn says she was calling everyone, and got mad at Bethenny for not giving her the money for the house. She would have sold her soul for it. In her interview, she says she’d been sober for months, but had a glass of wine here and a glass of wine there, and the lawsuit was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Two bottles of rosé wasn’t enough. Ann emailed everyone, and they got the code to LuAnn’s phone. Barbara said, enough is enough, got power of attorney, and they blocked calls and emails. LuAnn says she doesn’t remember a damn thing. Barbara said if she refused to go to rehab, they were literally going to strap her down and bring her there. LuAnn says she owes them, but Bethenny says she doesn’t. That’s what friends are for. Thanks. Now I have an earworm of that song. LuAnn says she had to learn that alcohol was a power greater than herself – for the second time. She doesn’t want to hear from Dorinda unless it’s coming from a good place. If not, LuAnn doesn’t want a relationship with her at all.

Tinsley and Ramona are ready for tennis; a pro is coming to give them a lesson. Ramona says she flirted with the pro at a bar. She didn’t want to date him, but wanted to take lessons. Tennis pro Michael comes in. In her interview, Dorinda says, Ramona loves to flirt, and hires people so she can flirt constantly. Dorinda just watches while Tinsley and Ramona play. We find out Tinsley played at Columbia University. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, if Tinsley gets too many balls, Ramona won’t be happy. Ramona wants all the balls, and wants them hard. Dorinda eventually wanders off. In her interview, Tinsley says, Ramona was being competitive, and should stick to flirting. It’s the game she plays best. Ramona says her game isn’t that great right now. She’s been traveling, and then it was raining. She leaves the court.

Bethenny goes to her investment property in Easthampton, bringing Barbara along. She purchased it on a whim, getting a great deal. She’s not sure if she should sell it or keep renting, and wants Barbara’s opinion. She wants to talk to someone on planet earth. We flash back to Ramona babbling about how she wouldn’t own a property in Easthampton. Barbara says, it’s Architectural Digest. It’s priceless. Bethenny says she rented it for eight weeks at $15K, and it’s cheaper to run, so it pays for itself. In her interview, Barbara says, the house has great bones. She thinks it’s the perfect house. They talk about the trim, and some of it looks like mine. I do not, however, live in the perfect house. Bethenny says she doesn’t want to sell it now, and Barbara says she’ll live there.

Dorinda tells Sonja to spill the beans about the dinner. Sonja says it was mostly about LuAnn’s recovery. She went back to rehab for fourteen days. Ramona says, in her opinion, fourteen days isn’t rehab; it’s a vacation. And God knows, she’s the expert. In her interview, Ramona doesn’t think LuAnn is touching on her deep emotional problems. Sonja says it was about being supportive, and not taking her off the rails. Dorinda says part of getting sober is responsibility. Another expert weighs in. She says if a trigger causes LuAnn to fall off the wagon, she shouldn’t do cabaret, but stay longer in rehab. I have no words about Dorinda deciding what triggers someone else. Sonja says, Barbara is having a clambake, and she asked who was invited. Barbara told her to just bring Tinsley. LuAnn is in a very vulnerable state, and doesn’t want emotional triggers. Dorinda asks if it’s Barbara’s clambake or LuAnn’s? Since Barbara told her about it, should she call and find out if she’s disinvited? Sonja says everyone thinks Dorinda should give LuAnn a call. Dorinda knows Sonja is trying her best, but says that’s not happening; it’s ridiculous to her. Sonja says Barbara wants LuAnn to be comfortable, and Dorinda says that’s not her responsibility. In her interview, Tinsley doesn’t know why Barbara is causing tension. it seems like she wants to make it worse. Sonja says Dorinda should call out of respect to Barbara and LuAnn, but Dorinda repeats, it’s not happening. She’ll call Barbara, and see if she wants her there.

It’s official, Bethenny is not selling. She gives Barbara an upstairs tour. Dorinda calls Barbara, and asks, what is this? Has she been disinvited to the clambake? Barbara says she’s not disinvited. Dorinda asks if she’s expected to call LuAnn. She’s not doing it. They had one incident after thirteen years. We flash back to Dorinda being a drunken a-hole, telling LuAnn at least she doesn’t have a mug shot. Dorinda adds, and frankly, she didn’t say anything that wasn’t true. She spent the next four weeks apologizing, after years devotion. Then LuAnn was bashing her in the press. Barbara keeps trying to talk, but Dorinda just talks over her. She says she’s been taking the high road. In Barbara’s interview, she says Dorinda’s problem is that she can’t say she’s wrong. She has an excuse for everything. She’s her own worst enemy. Dorinda wants to be assured that LuAnn is in a good place and there won’t be any erratic behavior. LuAnn should call her. Barbara is concerned about LuAnn sticking to her program, and doesn’t want to put her in a vulnerable position. Dorinda says, LuAnn is running around doing cabaret. Barbara says she’s doing well, but she’s only fifty-five days sober. Ramona thinks it’s ridiculous; they’re not in high school. Funny, since I’ve consistently thought that about her. Barbara says she wants them there, but just give LuAnn a call. Dorinda says they’re not in that place, and it’s disingenuous. And disingenuous to her growth right now. She’s not mad; she’s nothing. Ramona says they should go there and resolve the issue. Dorinda says if she’s not good enough, she’ll disinvite herself. At LuAnn’s place, Bethenny asks if it’s animal farm over there. In her interview, Bethenny says, Dorinda is living in this argument, and wants to win and prove her point. They’re not on the road to repair. Barbara is sorry Dorinda feels that way. Dorinda tells Barbara that she’ll see her in the city. Bethenny never thought she’d apologize, but figured she’d call. Barbara says Dorinda wouldn’t let her talk. Bethenny says, Dorinda has to win, and Barbara says, there’s nothing to win.

Ramona says they’re not four, and I bite my tongue. Barbara calls LuAnn, and says she had an upsetting call from Dorinda. She was aggressive, and she’s not going to call LuAnn. Dorinda says she doesn’t need to bend the knee. I heave a huge sigh, since this isn’t Game of Thrones. Not even close. LuAnn tells Barbara that’s why she wanted Dorinda to call. She knew Dorinda wasn’t in a good place. Ramona gripes that Barbara made it worse. Bethenny tells LuAnn, not only won’t Dorinda apologize, she thinks Dorinda wouldn’t spit on LuAnn if she was on fire.

Barbara shops for the clambake. She thinks it’s going to be thirteen people. LuAnn joins her at the market. Barbara loves a clambake. She loves anything not in the kitchen. She never has the right tools to cook. LuAnn suggests crab cakes. Barbara is blown away by Dorinda’s call. LuAnn says she called it. Dorinda isn’t in the right headspace. Barbara says, she’s not drinking, but LuAnn doesn’t buy it. Sonja said Dorinda wasn’t drinking, but LuAnn couldn’t do it on her own. She thinks Dorinda’s been drinking too long for that, but God bless her if she does it. In Barbara’s interview, she doesn’t think it’s necessary for Dorinda to go to rehab, and LuAnn wouldn’t be the person to make that decision. I like Barbara. She seems very fair. LuAnn hopes Ramona isn’t coming. Barbara tells her, Ramona said she wasn’t. LuAnn says Dorinda is being coached by Ramona.

Dorinda says she’s not calling and making a spectacle of forgiveness. She’s happy she’s not going. Ramona tells Dorinda that when she’d said something negative about John, Dorinda said it hurt because Ramona was a good friend. Maybe LuAnn feels the same way. Dorinda won’t accept that, and says she’s sending LuAnn a text. She doesn’t even need to add anything. Ramona looks at it, and she likes it. She tells Dorinda that she’s reaching out in a way; it’s a life lesson. She thinks it’s fabulous. Appropriate, and not confrontational. Dorinda hits send.

LuAnn gets the text. She reads it to Barbara. When you haven’t forgiven those who hurt you, you turn your back against your future. When you forgive, you walk forward. – Tyler Perry. In her interview, LuAnn says, how deep. They love him, but really? Not Gandhi? Not even Oprah? Not Deepak Chopra? Barbara says she could respond with question marks. LuAnn says she could say, very deep, but Barbara says, no. That’s antagonistic. She has Ramona in her ear. It’s crazy times two.

The clambake is being set up. Barbara checks everything out. LuAnn says it looks great. Barbara says she heated the pool in case anyone wants to go in. LuAnn says, or if she wants to push someone in. Is Ramona coming? Barbara says all she knows is she over-ordered on lobster.

Oh boy. On the preview before the commercial, they revealed Ramona is going to show up. She’s so freaking clueless. I’d love to see her get a slap in the face. Repeatedly.

Bethenny arrives bringing friend Gina. She says the house has a Moroccan vibe. In her interview, she’s impressed that Barbara built a house in the Hamptons. She can’t build a card house. Barbara isn’t into design, so the interior is a little ADD.

Ramona tells Dorinda that she’s saying her piece to Barbara. She doesn’t know if she’s invited, but she’s bearing two bottles of wine. Dorinda says she’s looking forward to silence and alone time.

LuAnn tells Bethenny about the text. She doesn’t know how to respond. Bethenny says she doesn’t have to. LuAnn reads it to Bethenny, and they laugh, and Bethenny says, she’s quoting Tyler Perry instead of Gandhi?

Tinsley, Ramona, and Sonja pull into Barbara’s driveway. Sonja thinks Dorinda should have come along and sucked it up, but Ramona says she shouldn’t have to. There will be a hundred people there. Once again, clueless, since Barbara said it was more like thirteen. Ramona says she’s set a thirty minute timer. She’s waiting thirty minutes before she talks to Barbara; she doesn’t want to go in too quickly. They promised Dorinda that they’d leave after an hour, so another timer is set for that. They walk inside the house, but no one is there. They wonder if they’re early, and can’t figure out where everyone is. Apparently they don’t understand what a clambake is either. How did any of these women survive for so long?

Bethenny says she loves Tyler Perry, but she would have thought Confucius. LuAnn says, a fortune cookie would have been better. Ramona says she wants to tell Barbara that Luann wanting a call from Dorinda is ridiculous based on her current behavior. LuAnn doesn’t tell the truth – only the truth that works for her. They wander around aimlessly.

Ann says LuAnn doesn’t need to respond. It’s not forever. Right now, they’re riled up. LuAnn sees Sonja come in, and smiles. She’s followed by Ramona, and I laugh at the immediate change in LuAnn’s expression. She says, ugh. Bethenny can’t believe it.

Next time, LuAnn tells Ramona to cut to the chase, Barbara gets in the pool, Barbara asks Dorinda if she heckled LuAnn, and Dorinda and LuAnn cross paths at a party.

📘 The new season of The Book of John Grey premieres on April 6th.

🛀 Possible OLTL and AMC Return…

From Soaps In Depth:

Join Soaps In Depth editors — and lifelong soap fans — Richard Simms and Charlie Mason as they dish about everything that’s right and wrong with daytime dramas in the all-new Soaps In Depth Podcast! Every week, these two offer their uncensored opinions on current storylines, praise outstanding performances, discuss the latest news, and tease what’s coming up next on all your favorite shows.

With rumors flying that “there are talks” about the possibility of ALL MY CHILDREN and ONE LIFE TO LIVE returning, Richard and Charlie discuss what the latest reboot might look like. Plus, they look at primetime soaps like DYNASTY and THE HAVES & THE HAVE NOTS to figure out what their daytime counterparts might “borrow” from them. All this and more!

👓 Seeing Thursday Like…





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