April 29, 2019 – A Trap Is Set For Ryan, Brittany’s Enchanted Forest, a Dark Game, a Quad of Views & Kitty’s Theme Game


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Sonny makes lasagna, telling Jason that he cooks for Carly when he can. Sam comes in, and Sonny says he thought she was at DOD. She says she’s on her way, but wanted to stop there first. She heard the session with Kristina didn’t go well. Her mom said Sonny thought they were getting through, but then Kristina shut down. Sonny says, Shiloh did a number on Kristina. He asks if Sam found out where he keeps the Pledges. She says she’s getting there, and Sonny says they need her help to get Kristina’s Pledge back.

There’s a knock at the DOD door. Shiloh answers, saying they don’t have to knock. The door is always open. He introduces himself, and the man at the door says he’s Mark Turner. He walks in on incredibly loud shoes, and Shiloh asks what led him to them. Mark wonders where he begins. The theme from Love Story plays in my head.

Curtis phones Jordan to see how she’s doing. She says, good, adding that dialysis is just a small part of her life. Curtis says it’s vital to her existence, and she asks if he called to remind her. He says he called because he misses her. She says she misses him too, but she can survive a few days without him. He says she’s shattered his illusion, and she asks if he’s getting anywhere. He says the pharmacy break-in is a hot topic with local gossip, especially among the junkies. He found a user who might have something. A dude who looks like Jesus shows up, but says his name is Timmy. Curtis hands him breakfast.

Lucy sees Jordan, and tells her that a lot folks are still talking about Curtis’s big proposal at last year’s Nurses’ Ball. She’s wondering if he’ll perform his magic again this year. Jordan says he’s out of town, but she’ll check with him. Lucy wonders what about a magic act together? Franco approaches, saying he has an idea for a Nurses’ Ball number; it’s a duet. Lucy says, that’s sweet, but it might be dicey. Not that he isn’t talented, but it’s the whole murder confession thing. Jordan says he was an invaluable help to the PCPD, and without him, they might not have realized Doc was really Ryan.

At the cemetery, Lulu tells Laura that she pitched the exclusive interview with Ava to Peter, and he gave her the green light. Laura says, Ryan will definitely be following the Port Charles news. Lulu says first, they have to put Ava and Kevin together, and post it on the internet. Is Laura sure she’s ready for this? Laura says, let’s get it done, her new catch phrase. At the cemetery entrance, Felicia tells Mac this is a group effort, and they need him on the team. Mac says, after all she’s been through, she’s still committed? She says Ryan isn’t getting the jump on them this time. When he comes back, they’ll be ready. Ava arrives, and asks if everything is in place, and where the guest of honor is. Doc says, right here. Let’s give my brother the memorial he deserves.

Sam thinks Spinelli might be the right choice, but Jason says he was already involved, and someone might recognize him. Sonny tells her, if there’s any trouble, get the hell out. They also need to tell Kristina that what she said doesn’t matter; nothing can hurt him. Sam says she needs to get into the records, and has to go. Jason tells her, be careful, and Sonny says, good luck. She leaves, and Jason asks if there was any fallout after Kristina used the phone. Sonny says she eventually calmed down, and is with Neil. Jason says if anyone was looking for Kristina, they would have heard by now.

Mark says it was like Shiloh was speaking to him, and reads from Shiloh’s book. If you can’t find love outside of yourself, search inside. That’s why he’s there; Shiloh changed his life. Shiloh asks how he learned about them, and he says he saw Shiloh speak at the plaza. He was convinced when he saw how they reached out to the homeless, and he bought the book. He’s hoping he can learn to search inside too. Shiloh says, it’s an honorable goal. He wonders why Mark went to the seminar, and Mark says he told himself he wasn’t going to do this. Shiloh tells Mark, give the pain to him. Mark says his girlfriend left him. She said he was too clingy and dependent, with no job and no life of his own, and she’s right. He just wants to make people happy. Can Shiloh help him? Shiloh believes they can.

Jordan sees Margaux, and says despite the joint statement, Franco is still getting blowback of his false confession. Lucy asks Margaux if she has any special talents, and Margaux says she’s good at putting criminals away, but Lucy says she’s asking if Margaux sings, or does magic, or that aerial thing with silks. Margaux says she did synchronized swimming in college, and Lucy says she’ll get back to her on that. Ta! Jordan explains the Nurses’ Ball to Margaux. Margaux says she’s heading to the station, and says they can talk about whether another joint statement is necessary on the way. Jordan says she’s having coffee with her son. Margaux says, no offense, but Jordan doesn’t look good. Jordan jokes about forgetting to put on blush, and Margaux asks if she’s sure she’s okay. Chase and Valerie approach, and Valerie says they want to open an investigation. Chase tells them that Kristina has disappeared.

Felicia tells Laura that Doc loves her, and only her. Laura doesn’t like the situation, but she can do it. Ava says Ryan will lose what’s left of his mind when he sees her with Doc. Mac reminds them, crazy isn’t stupid. Ryan is never more dangerous than when his ego is bruised. Doc says this time; they have the upper hand. When he sees they’ve declared him dead, Ryan will think he’s in the clear, and return. Lulu says it will be covered by The Invader. She’s putting it up on the website, and guarantees it will be trending in no time.

Laura says there’s been evidence of a pharmacy break-in in the Niagara Falls Area. Drugs were taken that are the same ones you’d need if you lost a limb. Ava says, there are also the calls. It’s just breathing, but she’s sure it’s Ryan. Laura says the authorities have closed the case, but that doesn’t mean a PI can’t continue it. Curtis is up in Canada investigating the break-in. Doc says, until then, they have their own work to do.

Curtis tells Timmy that he just want information about the break-in at the pharmacy. Does he know about it? Timmy asks what’s in it for him, besides breakfast?

Jordan says she hasn’t heard anything about Kristina being missing. How long has it been? Chase says, more than 48-hours. Jordan suggests she took off; it’s not unheard of. Valerie says, except Kristina called her from a blocked number asking for help. That’s all she got out when the line went dead. If she called Valerie, Kristina must be in real trouble. They’ve been on the outs since Valerie criticized her friends. Jordan asks if Kristina is in with a bad crowd, and Chase says, yeah. Jordan asks where Kristina was last seen, and Chase says, she was at the DOD house.

Mark tells Shiloh that he wants to take as many classes as he can. Shiloh says Mark mentioned he didn’t have a job, and the class fees are on a sliding scale. Mark says his situation is just the opposite. His parents died in a car crash; the brakes were defective, and there was money from the car company. He’s an only child, so he got it all, but he’d give up everything to have his parents back, or if Gillian hadn’t left. In his book, Shiloh says perfect comfort is found in untold sacrifice. He thinks Shiloh can help him. Shiloh hopes so. Sam comes in, and Shiloh introduces their newest seeker, saying, he’s there for the introductory class. Sam hopes Mark gets as much out of it as she did. Mark asks if Shiloh will be there, adding he’s probably too busy. Shiloh says he enjoys watching new people find their path. He tells Mark to go in the back, where the other members are, and asks Sam if she’s heard from Kristina. Sam says their mom spoke to Kristina, and she’s still working things out. Shiloh hates that Kristina’s doubts got the better of her, but Sam says she’ll come back home after a while. Shiloh hopes it’s before Sam joins the Trust, and Sam says she was hoping the same thing. That’s why she’s there.

Neil comes by Sonny’s place. Sonny tells Neil coking relaxes him and helps him think. Neil says Kristina told him at length how she doesn’t blame Shiloh for her getting kidnapped. She kind of implied Jason is hard to catch. On one hand, she respects him, but on the other, she’s angry for him taking away the thing she wants. Jason asks if she still doesn’t know what would have happened, and Neil says she’ll only shut down. When she’s not isolating herself, she’s been playing board games with Max. They seem to have a good rapport. Sonny says, she’s known Max her whole life. Neil tells them that Kristina said she might be ready for another family meeting soon. He didn’t change her mind; Alexis did. Kristina witnessed Alexis breaking down. She saw Alexis’s distress, and is starting to realize they’re motivated by love. Sonny says, she’s got that right. Neil says he’s discovering that Kristina is a unique and intelligent woman. Underneath Shiloh’s dogma, she’s vibrant. Sonny asks if she mentioned anything about the Pledge she gave Shiloh.

Neil says she didn’t mention anything, but he doesn’t expect her to. Sonny says he thought they were starting to get through, and Neil says they’ve made inroads, but still have a long way to go. The closer Kristina gets to reclaiming herself, the worse she’s going to feel about the Pledge, especially if it incriminates Sonny. Sonny says, that’s impossible, and Jason says, Kristina doesn’t know about the business. Maybe she exaggerated or lied, but there’s no proof; nothing that can be takes to the cops. Sonny says, the worst that can happen is an investigation will be opened, but it won’t go anywhere. He thinks that should be explained to Kristina, but Neil asks, what if he’s wrong?

Sam tells Shiloh that she was going to suggest they go upstairs, but he has new seekers. He can’t abandon them, or they’ll be disappointed. He’ll see her afterward.

Jordan says DOD was on their on radar until Jason got picked up. Chase says Michael was worried about Kristina’s well-being. She was about to take a big step, having been chosen for some honor. Jordan asks what he means, and he says the group is secretive. Margaux says Jason was released because Shiloh insisted they let him go. She ask if Chase is sure Kristina’s family doesn’t know where she is.

Sam sneaks upstairs to Shiloh’s office, which seems pretty easy to get in with a bobby pin, so they’re not all that good at being secretive. She sees the files are color-coded, and says, why make it easy? She flips through the file folders, looks through one, shakes her head, and puts it back. She finds her own folder, and takes it out.

Timmy tells Curtis, breakfast is good, but Curtis has to make it worth his while if he wants Timmy to talk about the pharmacy job. Curtis guesses there’s no chance he’d do it to save people’s lives. Did he have anything to do with it? Timmy says someone wanted to hire him, but he turned them down. Curtis asks. what about the drugs that were stolen? He gets why someone would steal painkillers, but what about the other stuff? Was he keeping it for himself? Timmy says he didn’t do it. Curtis tells him, talk first; then he gets the money. Maybe he can give Curtis a theory. He hands Timmy a bill, and Timmy says he was given a list. Curtis hands him another bill, asking who the person was who gave him the list.

Franco shows up at the cemetery. He says when Ava said this was happening, he didn’t believe it. Why give that evil bastard a ceremony? Doc says, closure, and Ava says, to end the nightmare for good.  Franco says at least she’s given up on her ridiculous idea of luring him out of hiding. Laura says, good riddance. Doc says he wishes he’d healed Ryan, and they’d grown older together, like twins should. He was given the greater gift; intelligence and sanity, but failed Ryan. He had hoped Ryan could find peace, but maybe in death he’ll be healed; conquer his demons and find peace. Franco hopes he rots in hell, and from high above, Kiki gets to watch. Lulu films everything.

Laura says her daughter was stronger and smarter than Ryan. Her life is beginning, and his is over, thank God. He lost and they won. Felicia says Lulu beat him, and you know who else beat him. Her and Mac. All those times he said he was smarter than they were; who’s smarter now? He gave himself the punishment he deserves. They all step on the dirt. Ava says, Franco is right. He deserves to rot in hell for eternity, but her beautiful girl isn’t looking down on him. Heaven is filled with good things, and there’s no room for his memory. Kiki has forgotten him already. Like she will, as he deserves to be forgotten. Doc says amen. He puts his arm around Ava, and holds her. Franco is like, hmm… Lulu continues to film.

Curtis asks who hired Timmy. He says they didn’t have a business card. Curtis says they must have been in trouble, or injured. Give him something. Timmy says, it was a woman.

Jordan asks Valerie if she followed up, and Valerie says she went to the DOD house. Shiloh claimed he doesn’t know where Kristina is. Sam claims not to know either. Jordan asks if Sam seemed concerned, but Valerie tells her that Sam said Kristina was off somewhere to clear her head, and that Alexis had heard from her, but then why would she call asking for help? Margaux wonders if Alexis knows where she is. Chase thinks something is off, and people know more than they’re saying.

Neil says Kristina’s greatest asset is also her greatest liability. She knows her family loves her, and is acting in her best interest. If they confront her about the Pledge, and she admits she betrayed someone she loves, it will hurt her self-worth. The only thing worse, is if the person she betrayed is arrested and tried, causing lasting hurt. Sonny says, the chances are next to nothing, and Neil asks if he’s willing to bet Kristina’s future on next to nothing. Sonny says, no, and Neil tells him, don’t ask about the Pledge.

Sam goes through her own folder, and I tell her to stop lollygagging. Under her picture, it says, despite commitment issues, she’s likely worthy of the DOD Trust. She says, that’s right, Shiloh. Tell her his secrets so she can take him down. She sees a photo of when she was blindfolded, with Shiloh looking at her.

Sonny wonders if Kristina said anything about the phone call, but Neil says she only told him that she’d called a friend. Sonny asks if it was Shiloh or someone else from DOD. Neil tells Sonny, Kristina said it was someone she knew before DOD. Someone she had to cut ties with because of DOD. Her confession was full of regret. Jason says, Valerie Spencer, and Sonny says, that makes sense. Neil says Alexis heard her ask for help, but she didn’t have time to explain before they took the phone. If her friend suspects she’s being held against her will, they could call the police. Sonny says, the problem is, that Valerie is the police. She’s a detective with the PCPD.

Mark walks back into the living room with Shiloh. He says it seems so clear when Shiloh speaks. He’d like to hear more about cutting out negative people, and Shiloh says they can plan a course of study. Mark wonders where to start, and Shiloh says, the classes aren’t sequential. He can start where he wants. Mark also wants to volunteer. Can Shiloh show him online, or does he have an app? Shiloh says they don’t really post about those things. Mark bumps into another member, sending the books in his hands flying. Mark helps pick everything up. Shiloh asks the guy if he’s seen Sam. He has some new reading material for her from the library. The guy says he hasn’t, and Shiloh apologizes to Mark, saying he has to go. Mark asks if he can have a tour; he didn’t know there was a library. Shiloh suggests Mark stay for dinner, and afterwards, he’ll give Mark the grand tour. Shiloh extracts himself, and Mark sends a text. Upstairs, Sam looks on the back of the photo, and it says, it will be interesting to see what secrets she pledges. She takes out her phone, and reads a text that says, Shiloh looking for you. Get out now. I suspected Mark was working for her when he wouldn’t let Shiloh leave the room.

Jordan asks if Chase thinks Kristina’s family is involved, but Chase says, it’s so murky, he can’t tell. She hasn’t answered her phone in days. Margaux says she called Valerie, and Valerie says, it sounded like she got caught. She could be in danger. Jordan thinks they should open an investigation, but Margaux disagrees. Why waste time and resources? Alexis claims Kristina is away taking a breather. There’s no reason for an investigation. Maybe the call to Valerie was a prank. She said they weren’t on good terms. There’s no reason to waste resources on a non-event. Chase wonders who she’s protecting – Sonny or Shiloh.

At the MetroCourt, Ava says she needs a drink. Lulu says she uploaded the film, and it’s definitely click bait. It’s already been picked up and posted elsewhere. Laura hates to leave the party, but has mayoral duties. Franco sees Ava at the small bar, and asks what’s going on with her and Doc. Ava calls Doc over, and Franco asks if she can’t talk to him unless this guy is there. Ava says he may as well know. She went to see Doc to help her find closure. At first, she was in denial, blaming Doc for Ryan’s crimes, but as they talked, they felt a connection. They were both betrayed, and understand each other’s shame and grief. Doc is everything Ryan pretended to be. Doc says Ryan stole his life, and ruined Ava’s. They need to be with someone who understands. Lucy walks in, and says he has to be Ryan. Her Doc would never touch the likes of Ava. Doc says it’s really him, and Lucy asks what he’s doing. He says, comforting a kindred spirit. Lucy says the last time she saw him, they were honoring Gail, and she delivered him to Laura. Doc says he hurt Laura too much. Felicia and Mac join them, and Lucy says Doc is talking and saying things, but he’s not making any sense. Felicia says, it’s okay, but Lucy says, it’s so not okay. Lulu says, there’s nothing that can be done, and Lucy says, the hell there isn’t.

Neil tells Sonny, if the police get involved, there could be severe ramifications. Sonny says, Valerie and the PCPD can look until hell freezes over, but they won’t find Kristina. Jason says they’ve had a lot of experience. Neil tells them, exit therapy is not an exact science. If it doesn’t work, and Kristina turns them over to the police, it could be a catastrophe.

Sam leaves Shiloh’s office. Shiloh sees her, and asks what she’s doing there.

Margaux says Chase is out of line. Valerie tells Chase, let’s go. They gave it their best shot. They leave, and Margaux asks if Jordan is ready to go or is Jordan going to question her judgement too? Jordan says she’s still going to see her son. Margaux leaves, and Jordan hopes Curtis is getting somewhere. She leans on the wall, and starts to call him, but the phone drops out of her hand, and then she drops to the floor.

In the elevator, Chase tells Valerie they can forget about the DA and do an investigation without approval. Valerie is in.

Curtis asks Timmy if the women left a name or said why she wanted the drugs. Timmy says he has to go. Curtis says he has a hundred dollars total, if Timmy coughs up the name of the woman who wanted him to boost the drugs.

Lucy tells Doc that when the truth was revealed that Doc unleashed Ryan, she was the only one who stood up for him. She even gave him a place to live. Doc understands and appreciates it, but asks her to please trust him; he knows what he’s doing. Lucy says, not from where she’s standing. She’s talked to his neighbors, and he hasn’t even been home for the past few nights. Don’t tell her… She looks at Doc and Ava, and tells him, consider himself evicted. He can find a bed on the street. He’ll be so tired of Ava. By the time the Nurses’ Ball rolls around, he’ll be heartbroken and friendless. Felicia tells her that they need to talk about it, but Lucy says, apparently, there’s nothing left to say, and leaves in tears. Franco asks if Ava is okay, and Ava says she’s fine. Franco says, from where he’s siting, she doesn’t seem all right. He leaves, and Mac says that Ava is good at playing her roll. Lulu says the video is trending, and Mac says, it worked. Felicia says they need to hope against hope that it got Ryan’s attention. Ava’s phone rings.

Tomorrow, Finn asks Elizabeth if she’s heard from Hayden, Neil says they have another complication, and Stella finds Jordan.

Vanderpump Rules

The theme of the engagement party is enchanted forest. Brittany is thrilled at how the venue looks. Jax signs the last of the checks. In his interview, he says, it’s a solid wedding, never mind an engagement party, but this is the new Jax. He rolls with the punches. He tells Brittany that she’s worth it. She goes to change.

Tom is figuring out what he’s wearing. He tells Ariana that he’s toying with wearing a hat. Ariana doesn’t think he should upstage the groom. He says it’s a constant challenge.

Lala decides to wear a headpiece. She wanted to wear a crown, because she has to let bitches know what’s up. Whatever that means. She’s queen?

Stassi tells Beau that she can’t believe they’re going to Jax’s engagement party. Jax is still an a-hole, but doesn’t take out on Brittany or them anymore. Beau can’t open a bottle, and Stassi asks him to give it to her. He’s skeptical, but she opens it easily. She asks, who’s your daddy?

Schwartz tells Katie that he wants to wear a TomTom onesie. He can’t picture Katie pregnant. He thinks she’ll be a monster of a human. I think it could go either way.

Lala says she’s going to continue not drinking. She tries to be a good human, but takes all her downfalls out on Rand. Scheana says Adam won’t speak to her because she went on a date. Lala think if he doesn’t want that happening, he should do something about it. She says Scheana always gives it her all, and they end up walking on her. Scheana starts crying, and Kristen says she’s not pregnant, right? That’s a no. She tells the girls that Adam loves penguins, and she found out you can adopt one from the aquarium. I’m laughing because she probably thinks you’re actually adopting it like you would a child or a pet. She says if Adam is still mad at her after she got him an effing penguin, they’re done. I’m with you, Scheana.

Stassi tells Beau that she’s trying be conscious of everything; recognizing the moments she can go off. She had her birthday freak-out. Unfortunately, but it happened. We flash back to her calling Beau incessantly, then slamming the phone on the floor. After that, her mom told her that she was the problem, and she was lucky to have him. Beau says it was awful and unacceptable. She saw a freaking witch, and she’s never tried to better herself before.

Ariana tells Tom that she’s thinking of talking to Lisa at the party. Because in the reality TV world, the best time to bring up your personal beefs is at someone else’s event. Preferably someone who’s totally unrelated to the problem. Ariana says she’s known Lisa for eight years. There’s no reason not to be able to speak respectfully and honestly about something that’s bothering her. In Ariana’s interview, she says Lisa encouraged the Toms to go to Mexico, then publicly shamed them. Exaggerate much? Tom says a huge falling out would suck and affect things, but Ariana says it would only one person’s fault, because she’ll be respectful.

James sees therapist Anita. He tells her that he’s trying his best to keep his temper. He was controlled, and when there was a group vacation to Mexico, he didn’t take the news well that he wasn’t invited. He blew up at the hosts of the trip. We flash back to that. He doesn’t understand the mentality of being angry and not doing anything about it. She asks about his drinking, and he says he’s only had a couple of beers here and there. I laugh because in the old People’s Court shows with Judge Wapner, any time someone said they just had a couple of beers, the judge would look at Bailiff Rusty and practically roll his eyes, knowing it was probably more like a six-pack. James insists he hasn’t gotten drunk, and has only had two at the most. He’s more comfortable doing that, than going a party and being the sober guy. He thinks he’s more charismatic when he drinks, and doesn’t think he’d be that person without it. He tells her that Lisa says he’s full of self-doubt. In his interview, he says he thinks too much when he’s sober. He’s twenty-six; he can make his own decisions. Anita suggests he focus on what he should do for himself, not what he can do for others. He says not caring what they think is impossible. She tells him, the more power he gives to how people look at him, the worse he starts to feel he’s not good enough. He says he wishes he’d said different things at different moments. Then life would be different. Ha! Don’t we all wish that, and yes it would. A real Confucius, that James.

Scheana says they’re not only going to celebrate Brittany and Jax, but to party. They get on a party bus, and Lala asks if there’s a stripper pole. Of course there is. Brittany says they have Kentucky in the building. Tom goofs around on the pole. In Tom’s interview, he says if things ever went south with TomTom he has to have something to fall back on. Right now, he’s falling back on the pole. Jax sees a video, and he’s jealous he’s not on the bus. Brittany notes Lala’s headpiece, and says everyone is on theme. She hopes Lala isn’t upset that she’s not a bridesmaid. In Brittany’s interview, she says she can’t have twenty bridesmaids, and hopes Lala doesn’t kick her ass. We flash back to Lala yelling at James. Brittany doesn’t want anyone to feel sad or left out it. It makes her feel guilty inside.

Scheana hates the tension between her and Adam. She wants to make it better, but he won’t even make eye contact.

Jax says Brittany looks beautiful. I do too, but I’m surprised she isn’t more on theme. Brittany thinks the place looks amazing. In her interview, she says she’s living the fairytale dream. Lisa and Ken arrive. Giggy! Jax says they only have beer and wine. There are certain people he doesn’t trust with tequila. He’s one of them.

Scheana says, depending on how tonight goes with Adam, she might Uber home. She tells the girls that Ethan wanted to make her dinner. He did, and two bottles of wine later, went downtown for a half hour. It doesn’t necessarily lead to a home run. Then she says, Adam won’t do it, it’s not his thing, and we all go, what? I’m not getting this at all. He won’t commit; says she can date others, but gets mad when she does; and he’s not satisfying her sexually. Oh yeah, sign me up. Scheana is not the brightest bulb in the box, but she deserves better. She consistently picks guys who are unavailable in one way or another.

The bus arrives. Jax and Brittany pose by the flower wall. Brittany hugs mamaw. Tom opens champagne with a knife. Brittany’s father tells Lisa that when Brittany first came out there, Lisa was like a mom. He didn’t have to be so concerned about her safety. Lisa’s concern for Brittany’s welfare made it better. Lia says Brittany is a lovely girl. She’s happy to be there for Brittany, and watch her grow. Don asks if Jax asks if Jax has really changed, and Lisa thinks he has. He has Brittany by his side, and it’s made a difference. In Lisa’s interview, she says she doesn’t know if it will last, but Brittany is the best thing that’s happened to Jax. That’s the only thing they all agree on. Don says, every man needs a good woman, and Lisa says, hopefully only one. She keeps telling her husband that. Jax introduces sister Jenny to Lisa, and they show her their tattoos.

Brittany says she has a permanent smile, and tells Lala that she didn’t want her to feel left out. Lala says this is Brittany’s day, and she should have whoever she wants. She has an engagement gift; it’s from her and Rand. She gives Brittany an envelope, and inside she finds a voucher for a trip to Cabo on the private jet. In her interview, Brittany doesn’t know what’s worse. That she had to talk to Lala about not being a bridesmaid or that Lala rewarded her for that with the trip of a lifetime. She feels like a little turd. Lala says just tell her when, and they’ll fuel the jet, and have the best time ever.

Schwartz tells Adam that he can feel the tension. He can put a knife between Adam and Scheana. He asks if the catalyst is Scheana being with another dude. Adam says he asked if she slept with him, and she said yeah. Kristen tells Scheana to be honest and real. Hopefully he will too. Schwartz tells Adam that he doesn’t think it’s a deal breaker. In his interview, Schwartz says in his relationship, he learned, resistance is futile. You have to cave, and make the commitment. Commit to Scheana and see what happens. He laughs, and slaps his knee. Adam asks to talk to Scheana.

Adam says he doesn’t know where to start. Scheana says for the last eight months, everyone has been saying they love each other, but he says he doesn’t have feelings for her. He says he doesn’t know if he’s ready. She told him if he dated, she’d be upset. She says he told her that he didn’t care if she dated, as long as it wasn’t someone he knew. Raising his volume like ten notches, he screams they talked at the white party, and she screwed another guy. Lisa comes by, but hangs back from intervening. Schwartz is dancing with Katie, and says he’s going to twirl her so he can access the situation. Scheana asks Adam if he loves her. He looks away, and she tells him, answer the question. He says, no. She was just with another guy all weekend. She says she thought about him the whole time, and he says, thanks for the consideration. That makes it so much better. She says she’s so sorry she did something that made him realize he has feelings for her, but if she hadn’t, would he ever speak up? No. They’d have just kept on doing the same thing. She did it just to see how he felt. He gets up, and she tries to stop him. He says she’s trying to rationalize it, and Scheana says she’s finishing the conversation. She asks him for a hug, and he reluctantly responds. He says, please. He needs to walk away. In her interview, Scheana says, even though they’re not in a relationship, she feels like they literally broke up. Adam can’t jet fast enough.

At SUR, manager Monica sees James has a reservation, and reminds the waitress that he no longer works there. He and Raquel are seated and order. In his interview, James says everyone at the engagement party will be so wasted. He makes fun of them, imitating them drunk. He says he didn’t expect an invite, although he would have gone had he gotten ne. He tells Raquel that he hopes they’re invited to the wedding. Raquel says for that to happen, he’ll have to change his approach with everyone. He says he’s so in love with her, she’s all he wants. She says he doesn’t want to any more cheating accusations. James says, then there’s hope for him. He never cheated on her. I don’t think any of us believe that, and Raquel says, now that they live together, it will be harder to make something up. She’ll be with him every day.

Scheana cries, and shows Kristen the adoption paper for the penguin with Adam’s name on it. Kristen asks if he knows, again, like it’s a real kid. Scheana weeps and shakes her head. Tom takes a drink from Ariana’s flask. Ariana asks if Lisa would like some warm, disgusting tequila, but that’s a hard no. In Ariana’s interview, she says she loves Tom. She doesn’t show her commitment with a wedding, but she’s doing the bravest thing she can possibly do – go to bat for him with Lisa. She tells Lisa that she loves and respects her, but she said something about the Toms not working hard at TomTom. She’s not going to lie; it bummed her out. They would have never gone on the trip if Lisa hadn’t said to go. Lisa says the Toms have a playful relationship, and she’d never want to ruin their friendly banter. Ariana thinks when people see it, they’ll think the Toms are idiots. Lisa says one of the reasons she wanted to work with them was they’re youthful energy and sense of humor. Ariana says they have more to offer than that. She can’t speak for Schwartz, but Tom is probably one of the hardest working people she’s known. We see Tom with the beer bong. She says, especially when it comes to something he loves, and he loves the bar. She doesn’t want people thinking they’re somebody Lisa pulled from the gutter. Omg, now she’s on another planet. Lisa tells her to lighten up. In Lisa’s interview, she says she enjoys teasing the Toms, and they give her good reason and good cause. Their personas aren’t serious. They’re not Bill Gates and Warren Buffet. Lisa tells Ariana, their names are on the building. That says a lot. Ariana wants them to be able to earn the same love and respect they fee for her. She loves and respects Lisa so much. Lisa hopes so, and they hug.

Brittany hugs her dad. Schwartz tells Jax, what a difference a year makes. It’s cliché, but 100% true. Jax says he used to wonder who he needed to be each day. He acted differently with different people, and got to the point where he couldn’t even keep up with what he was telling people. In Tom’s interview, he says Jax’s lies were on a different level. His parents owned 70% of CVS, he was waiting to be a firefighter, his modeling career was taking off, he was roommates with Channing Tatum. Tom says, let’s promise to always be friends, no matter what happens. He appreciates Jax’s dad, but wants to toast to Jax.

James asks Raquel if they’ll get married one day, and she nods. He says he loves her so much. In her interview, Raquel says she sees marriage down the road, and babies. She and James are perfect for each other. Her eyes don’t look like she believes it. She always looks trapped. The waitress tells James, sorry, but no employee discount. He says the meal was expensive, and he needs a shot. I can’t tell if that’s a joke or not, and I don’t think Raquel can either.

Lisa sees Beau, and asks if he’s looking for his princess. He says he was bringing her another drink. Lisa says Stassi seems happy with him. No one ever validated her; they suppressed her. She can see that Beau loves her a lot. He says he does, and Lisa wonders if he’s going to ask Stassi to marry him. He says he is. In her interview, Lisa says he listens to Stassi, and doesn’t try to make her into something she’s not. He nurtures her, cares for her, and loves her more than he does himself. Stassi joins them. Lisa says she and Ken were engaged three months, and they’ve been married for thirty-six years. She says she told Beau he was lucky to have Stassi. Stassi says her mom said she’ll mess it up. We flash back to the horrifying things Stassi’s mother was saying about her – to Beau. In Stassi’s interview, she says she felt herself bringing negativity and insecurity into the relationship, and sabotaging it. She tells Lisa that it makes her want to be combative; like, fine, she’ll do it. Lisa says Stassi is a strong woman, and similar to her. That’s why she’s always had an affinity for Stassi. Her mother’s negativity has nothing do with her . Stassi says both of her parents are on marriage number four. Beau says they’re not their parents. Lisa points out the way they look at each other. Stassi says she loves Beau him so much. Lisa says, it hurts, and Stassi agrees. Lisa promises it will be fine, and tells them to enjoy each day. In Stassi’s interview, she says it reconfirms she’s on the right track. Ken and Lisa are goals. She wants Beau to follow her everywhere, holding one of their dogs. Giggy! Lisa tells them, never prove her wrong.

Scheana wails to mamaw that she wants be happy. In Jax’s interview, he says, the party is amazing, but if he had one complaint it would be that Scheana found some way to make it about herself, because she wants to marry Adam tomorrow. Get your sh*t together. Scheana hugs mamaw, who asks if she wants to come to Kentucky for a few days.

Mamaw tells Schwartz that she never had a beer in her life. He says her beer cheese is awesome. It’s time to cut the cake. Brittany says it’s a practice round, and she and Jax feed each other. Stassi asks Don how proud he is. He says he wants to be on board 100%, and she says he sounds like her dad. She tells him that you have to trust, or it will drive you seriously crazy. In Stassi’s interview, she says she knows Jax has lied, cheated, and duped them all in the past, but this is the first time he’s proposed. She thinks she owes it to them to root for them. She tells Don, as long as Jax makes Brittany happy, technically, that’s all that matters. He says he’d take more comfort in that if he heard it from Jax. We flash back to Jax telling Don that he’ll always be number one. Stassi says if Jax messes up, they’ll crucify him; light him on fire. She’ll take a hot spike, and shove it up his ass. Don laughs. Scheana gets her drink on, and babbles about Adam. She says she did it to see if he cared; now it’s effed up. Jenny asks if Jax is happy, and tells him not to doubt who he is. She’ll always be in his corner, whether he’s a d*ck or the nicest person on earth. In his interview, Jax says his sister has the same qualities their father had. He can’t imagine life without her. She says she still doesn’t trust telling him anything. He says, that will never change. He can’t help himself.

Lisa asks for the mic. She says tonight is the night many of them thought would never happen. Jax has grown up. They’ve surrounded, supported, and loved him. It’s been a challenging year, but life is about obstacles to overcome, and challenges to rise to. With Brittany as his partner, they’ll go a long way. But if he messes with her Kentucky muffin, she’s coming for him.

In Lisa’s interview, she tells us, they say a leopard doesn’t change its spots, but the leopard she married did. If there’s hope for Ken Todd, there might be hope for Jax Taylor.

Brittany thanks everyone, and says they’ve gone through a lot, but have gotten so much support and love from everyone. They’ve never been happier. In Brittany’s interview, she says she knows people had doubts, but she sees their family and friends there, supporting him. They all love her and Jax. She tells the guests that she loves Jax more than anyone in the world. She’ll never give up on him. In her interview, she says the hell with people’s opinions. She believes they’ll get their happily ever after. In Jax’s interview, he says he doesn’t care what people think. He knows how much wants this, and loves her. It just fuels his fire to prove them wrong. Brittany says, everybody dance!

Tom tells Lisa that he needs her for something very important. She says, whatever it is, she’s not doing it. He shows her the beer bong, and she asks why she’d want do that. He says it fulfills the partnership. He and Schwartz have created a special bedazzled funnel with LVP on it. In Schwartz’s interview, he says it cements a partnership by funneling a beer. In Lisa’s interview, she says she never drank much beer, and never did a beer bong, but… she never turns down a dare. She bongs the beer, Tom yells, the queen! everyone cheers, and Lisa bows. In her interview, she says, and that’s the way you leave a party. Good night. She tells Ken, it was disgusting, burps, and says, sorry.

Next time – the Reunion – James is in shambles, Billie and Lala go at it again, Beau says watching the pilot scared him, Andy asks how Lisa is coping and she needs a moment, Lala says Raquel comes to her when it’s feeding time and expects not to get feasted on, James calls Brittany’s family a bunch of hillbillies, which doesn’t go over real big. Note to James: this is not how you get invited to the wedding.

I hope it works for Brittany and Jax. I’ll probably never like Jax, but it doesn’t matter. Brittany loves him, and I like her. I hope she gets her fairytale ending.

👑 Cue Game of Thrones title theme. It was time for the big battle, between the dead and everyone except Cersei. Besides doing a lot of staring at people, the Red Woman said some magic words, and the Dothraki suddenly got swords of flame. This made for great cinematography, but sadly, they fell into a trap. After that, everything was so dark throughout the entire battle, it was hard to see what was going on. I thought it was my TV until I read another blog post on it specifically (see below).

Edd got killed defending Sam, and Sam ran. Tyrion almost made Sansa smile, and it seemed like she actually mulled over them getting back together for a moment when he joked about it. I made noises when the Night King swooped down on zombie Viserian, and I also said, do something red lady! There was a giant zombie or a zombie giant that Lyanna ended up killing by stabbing in the eye, but she got squashed for her trouble, while the Hound took notes. Good thing Arya learned to move like a cat from that Zen/sword master, because she needed that skill to hide from meandering zombies later. Beric and the Hound teamed up, after the Hound just got done saying they were doomed no matter what. They ended up saving Arya, who crashed through a wall along with several zombies. Beric was a goner, but the Hound dragged them both away. Then the Red Woman finally showed up, yapping about purpose. Zombie dragon had a fight with Jon’s dragon, and Dany’s dragon incinerated the Night King, but he turned out to be like Yul Brynner in Westworld, because he just stood there laughing. Well, he had the same expression he always has, but he wasn’t even singed. Jon stupidly followed him, and the Night King raised his army back up from the dead, along with everyone who had just died. It was like, are we going to have to do this all over again?  And what good is Bran if he just sees stuff, and can’t do anything about it? The whole thing was just a mess. Ser Jorah saved Dany, but paid with his life. Jon Snow had enough, and extracted himself from the Night King’s minons, walloping everyone in his wake. The Night King had bigger fish to fry, heading for Bran. Theon was a big hero, saving Bran’s life for a millisecond at the expense of his own, but again, why? As the Night King stood in front of Bran, Arya flew out of nowhere and stabbed him with the dragon glass dagger. He shattered, and so did all the other Wights. Once again, who’s gonna clean up that mess? The Red Woman said, forget this, tossed her necklace, turned into a naked old lady, and dissolved. It was relentless and amazing, and IMO the best part was the shock of the recently dead rising.

This show is literally awesome. I find myself sitting with my mouth hanging open. I felt the same way about the books. The genre isn’t even my thing, but I was hooked from the first page.

Best quotes:

Jon: The Night King is coming. * Dany: The dead are already here.

Sansa (after Arya hands her a dagger): I don’t know how to use it. * Arya: Stick them with the pointy end.

👓 A Few Viewpoints…

Glad it wasn’t just me. Other people noted the darkness as well.


The death toll.


A simple review.


My favorite snarky recap.


🐱 Now For Something Completely Different…

And pretty weird.







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