What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
Sam, Jason, and Danny go to the park. Sam and Jason talk bikes while Danny plays ball. Sam asks Jason not to buy Danny a bike until he’s twenty.
On the phone, Shiloh says he wants the Job finished today, and to call when it’s done. Danny’s ball rolls near him, and he picks it up. He asks if Danny remembers him.
Kim opens one of Drew’s medals. He says the originals must have been confiscated when he went AWOL. Oscar had them replaced. Oscar’s last gift to him was a piece of his past.
Curtis meets Jordan and Stella at the MetroCourt. He says he only has a minute. He has to do a security walk-through at Aurora. Stella says she’s proud of him. Head of security is impressive, and better than chasing shadows and digging up other people’s secrets.
Peter goes to Lulu’s place. He tells her that he must have dropped his wallet in the couch cushions, and digs around. She says Rocco is at the Quartermaine’s and Charlotte’s father just her. He says he noticed she took a personal day. Is she okay? She says, everything is fabulous. She takes a sip of wine, which she’s obviously been drinking for a while. She says she’s taking Maxie’s advice, grabbing life by… whatever you grab life by, and throwing herself back into the mix.
Valentin tells Obrecht, welcome back to Windymere. She tells him, stop hovering, but he says he’d hate to see her take a tumble over the side. She says she knows the house well. She was holding people hostage there long before he showed up. Nina comes out, and Obrecht thanks her for her concern, but she’s safe in her own home. Valentin says she lives by herself. If anything happens, who knows when, or if, she’ll be discovered. Nina says it’s giving her peace of mind. Obrecht says, it’s not necessary, and they already have a full house with Charlotte and Sasha. Sasha joins them, and Nina tells her to let Obrecht know how roomy the house is. Sasha says they’re going to have even more room when she moves out.
Ryan picks up the phone, and tells Ava, hello darling. Has she missed him as much as he missed her? He saw her Crimson cover. It was evocative. And Midnight in the Garden pf Good and Ava, appropriate imagery. She says he never struck her as the type to follow fashion. He says that’s because she only saw him mimic his brother’s banal sense of style, but he threw in some flair. He has his own aesthetic. She says she noticed. She tells him, as he may have guessed, it’s not a social call. He asks, how can that be? He only ever thinks of her. He laughs, and says there has been something else on his mind. Not so much a who, but a what; his kidney, the one stolen from him. Did she happen to have a hand in that? At first she’s confused, but then the lightbulb comes on, and she says, that would make sense. She wondered why he, of all people, donated an organ, to the Commissioner no less. She thought he was offered a deal, but now he’s telling her that they actually stole it. Those self-righteous hypocrites. No wonder… he holds them in contempt. He tells her that she almost said we. She gets him. No matter how much she thinks she hates him, she knows him, like he knows her. He missed that. She says she hasn’t, and he says, of course not (🍷), but obviously she needs something from him. How can he help?
Stella tells Curtis, that came out wrong. A corporate job must be nice change. He says, it has its advantages; regular hours, a salary, generous benefits, especially while Jordan is recovering. Jordan says it will be better when she’s up to full speed, but Curtis tells her to take her time. Stella says they both deserve a rest, although it must be tame after chasing Ryan. Maybe Curtis will find some corporate espionage to spice things up.
Nina says Sasha promised to stay for the wedding. She can’t move back to Chappaqua now. Sasha says she’s not. She’s finding her own apartment. Between the job and some other things, she’s decided to stay. Nina hugs her, and says she’s so thrilled. When she sees Michael Other Things Corinthos, she’ll have to thank him. Sasha tells her not to say anything, and spare her the embarrassment, but Nina says she never got the chance to show Sasha’s prom date her baby pictures. She has to make up for lost time. Nina asks Obrecht if it isn’t wonderful, but Obrecht says she’s calculating the distance to shore, in case she decides to go swimming for exercise. Valentin asks if she can’t stay out of the water, and she says she’ll be better prepared for sharks this time. Nina says they don’t have them there, but Obrecht says, they’re not necessarily in the water. Nina is excited that her daughter chose to live in Port Charles. Obrecht says she’s brave, considering the crime rate and the low number of convictions. Nina sits between Valentin and Obrecht, and puts her arms around them. She says she has everyone she loves close by. Just the way she likes it. Neither Obrecht nor Valentin look thrilled.
Kim asks if Drew had no idea, and he says he was completely blindsided. She says, it’s pretty spectacular. Drew says he wishes they’d got there in time for Oscar to see them, but Kim says Oscar didn’t need medals for him to think Drew was a hero. She thinks he ordered them so Drew could be as sure as Oscar was that he’s a good man.
Shiloh asks Danny if his mom and dad are around. Jason runs up, and tells Danny to go back to his mom. Danny asks if he’s in trouble, but Jason says, not at all. Shiloh tells Danny to say hi to his mom. Danny runs off, and Shiloh tells Jason he has a lovely little boy despite his efforts to close him off. Jason says, do not approach his family again. Shiloh asks what Jason is going to do; it’s a public place, and Danny is a few feet away. How is he going to explain beating a guy for telling the truth? Jason says Shiloh assaulted Danny’s mother, calling him Hank. He asks if Shiloh wants another beating. He can’t speak if his jaw is wired, and he can’t grope anyone with two broken hands. Like the big baby he is, Shiloh says he’ll tell his lawyer that Jason has been making threats. He leaves, and Danny asks Jason if everything is okay. Jason says, it’s all good.
Kim asks Drew if the medals came with any paperwork, and he tells her the citations are there. She says she’d love to know what he did to earn them, and he gives her the envelope.
Lulu tells Peter, Maxie is right. She has so many amazing things in her life. For instance, her children. She has a kickass job with a kickass boss. She has a byline. People know who she is, and her stories make a difference. He says he knows that; he publishes them. She says she helped to catch a serial killer. She’s so much more than Dante’s wife. She’s Leslie Lou Spencer, and what she is, is remarkable. It’s hard to feel amazing and abandoned, but she’s more remarkable than abandoned. Peter is sure Dante is remarkable too, but from where he’s standing, Dante is an idiot.
Jordan asks Stella what’s going on with her. How’s Marcus? Stella says, same as usual. Very much in love with his wife. He’s in a very complicated, heartbreaking situation, all of which she’s accepted. Jordan says it’s wonderful how they’ve become such great friends, and Stella agrees it’s nice they’re in each other’s lives again. Jordan asks what about her genealogy search. Did she follow up? Stella says, nothing. She took the bait, and gave them money to send the relative a letter about meeting, but they never heard back. Jordan tells her, give it time. Stella says, whoever the mystery relative is, they’ve chosen to stay a mystery. Curtis and Jordan exchange looks, and Stella says they’re doing that thing couples do when they want to work your last nerve. Jordan says she took it upon herself to send the genetic markers to a friend in forensics. Stella asks if she’s related to Billy Dee Williams, and Curtis says, that would be awesome. Jordan says, genetically speaking, it’s a much closer relation than they thought.
Drew tells Kim that he got a medal for saving Shiloh, and she says, Shiloh claims that’s the moment he turned his life around, and embraced the light. Drew says he saved a man who turned out to be a con artist, but Kim says he couldn’t know that then. He says, according to Shiloh, they were best buddies. Kim looks at the paperwork, and says according to this, he rescued a civilian contractor, and went back to rescue SEAL Charles Tex Owens. Maybe he can give Drew information, and shed light on his supposed friendship with Shiloh.
Danny asks, what happened? Did he do something wrong? Jason says he did everything he was asked and didn’t argue. Sam says she’s the one who made a mistake. She should never have introduced Danny to Shiloh. He’s a bad man she was investigating, and should have told him. Danny asks why she didn’t, and she says she didn’t want to confuse him. Jason is pretty sure Shiloh knows not to come near Danny, but if he does, Danny should get them or an adult he trusts. He tells Danny not to be afraid; just be aware. Shiloh won’t hurt him, and if he tries, they’ll stop him.
Ava tells Ryan that she’s working with someone to reach Kiki. Kiki’s spirit can’t find peace. Ryan doesn’t see what that has to do with him, but she says, he killed her. He separated her soul from her body. The least he can do is help her put Kiki’s soul to rest
When they’re alone, Valentin says he owes Sasha an apology. He told her to steer clear of Michael, but now that she’s formed an emotional attachment, it might work in both their favors. She says she’s been trying to tell him that. Nina wants her there, and is happy she’s staying, but he’s the man Nina loves. Charlotte is Nina’s stepdaughter, and they’re a family. Valentin says she’s part of the family now. It’s not how he planned it, but sometimes things work out for the better. Sasha is everything he’d hoped for in a daughter for Nina. He’s happy she’s developed a life of her own that will keep her close by. That leaves just one problem; Obrecht. She asks how he suggest they handle that, and he tells her, leave it to him. He has a few ideas. Outside the door, Obrecht listens.
Jordan explains the DNA comparison between Stella and the mystery relative, showing her the percentage of genetic material they have in common. Stella asks if that makes them cousins, and then asks Curtis why he’s looking at her like that. Curtis says she knows nothing in the past or present could affect how they love and respect her. She says she’s starting to wonder, and he says, if something happened when she was younger, maybe before she lived with them, like perhaps having a child she couldn’t keep, she can tell him.
Stella asks if Curtis has lost his mind. She doesn’t have a secret love child roaming around. He says he didn’t think so, and she asks why he said that. He says, just on the off-chance, he wanted her to know she could tell them. She knows his heart is in the right place, but she’s told him time and again that he and his brother are all the children she needed. This has officially become more trouble than it’s worth. The truth can’t possibly be as crazy as the story they cooked up. Jordan says she’s closely related, but Stella says they have no intention of meeting with her, and she has no need to search the world for a stranger.
Lulu asks Peter what he said about her husband. He’s wonderful and amazing, so are their kids. He’s going through something horrible. Peter says he was there when Dante shot him. He doesn’t think Dante even knew what he was doing. But he doesn’t understand how Dante could walk away from them. She says, he has PTSD. Peter says, he abandoned the family he claims to love. She says he does love them. That’s why he’s making this choice; the most difficult choice of his life. He’s protecting them, knowing he might not return, in order to make her feel safer.
Ava tells Ryan, in death, as in life, Kiki refuses to speak to her. The psychic said Kiki thinks Ryan still has a hold on her, and needs to let her go. he asks, how? and she says the psychic seems think if he apologizes, Kiki will finally be able rest. He says, okay, and she says, so he’ll apologize for taking Kiki’s life, and let her go? He says, of course (🍷). Confession is good for the soul, but it’s not specified which soul. It’s not helping to remind Ava of who she is; a force to be reckoned with. Not some patsy being taken in by a con artist. The dead are dead. There are no souls wandering the earth for resolution. Kiki isn’t restless. Her soul doesn’t exist, and never did. He tells Ava, go home and come back after she gets the help she clearly needs. He hangs up the phone.
Drew and Kim approach Curtis’s table. Stella tells them again that she’s sorry for their loss. Drew thanks her, and tells Curtis the offices are emptied. His team can finish securing the area, and when Curtis is ready. Drop Drew a line when he’s done. He’s sure they’ll be safer.
Danny asks if he can go over his soccer moves, and Sam tells him to stay where they can see him. She asks Jason if he thinks Danny is okay, and Jason says, he seems to be. She doesn’t want him to be afraid that Shiloh is lurking somewhere. Jason thinks Danny trusts them to deal with Shiloh. Now, they just need to figure out how do that.
Shiloh waits. He remembers telling Drew that they could run a sting. Root the bastards out, and trick the sellers. They could split the money, and never see each other again. Returning to the present, he says, where the hell are you?
Ryan picks the phone back up. Ava says he’s right about one thing; he has no soul. It’s a comfort to know, once he’s gone, he’s gone for good. He’s nothing on the outside, and it matches what’s on the inside. He says, that’s more like it. There’s his Ava. She says whoever stole his kidney shouldn’t have stopped. He should be dead. The knife she plunged in his back should have killed him. He says that’s what he missed so much. Her veracity and passion. It was one of the first things he fell in love with. She says, then let her go. He says, whoever said if you love something, set it free was just making excuses. Why would you want it to go anywhere? That’s not how it works. She says, please, and begs him to let her go, so Kiki can rest in peace.
Lulu asks if Peter is trying reverse psychology on her; pissing her off about Dante so she defends him. Peter says he’s being honest because he cares. Lulu says he thinks he understands, but has no idea. They had issues like everyone else, but the bad was so small and insignificant, it was nothing compared to the good. How good it felt to love each other. That’s why Dante is staying away; he loves them. Peter wonders why he can’t find another way that doesn’t rip the family apart. Lulu says Peter reminds her of herself, passing out advice like she has a clue regarding what she’s talking about. It’s easy to Monday morning quarterback other people. If he had loved anyone before Maxie, maybe he’d understand. He says maybe he is love challenged, and is unfamiliar with the ins and outs, but if it hurts this much, maybe Lulu is better off without Dante. He walks out.
Nina says Obrecht’s room is being prepared. She tells Valentin that Obrecht insisted on the room farthest away from them. Obrecht says why should her snoring bother anyone. Valentin says her generosity in thinking of others is uncharacteristic. Sasha says she has to meet Michael. They’re going away, but she’ll send Nina her contact info. Nina looks at her phone, and says she’s been waiting for this. Obrecht asks if another body has been found, but Nina says it’s the new numbers from Crimson. They’ve exceeded expectations, and are annihilating the competition. She wants to get out the best champagne, and hopes Jax and Hayden choke on it at dinner. Obrecht says, Hayden is coming there tonight? Nina knows Hayden and Obrecht hate each other, and Obrecht accused Hayden of trying to kill her, but this is a super important business dinner. Obrecht says she’d rather eat in the barn, and Nina tells her, just don’t set it on fire this time. Everything is coming together. Crimson is on top, her beautiful daughter has decided to stay in town, and has found love. Sasha says they haven’t said the L-word yet, but Nina says it will happen. And her aunt didn’t drown. Obrecht says Nina needs to raise the bar. Nina says she’s marrying Valentin in September, and it’s going to be the happiest day. There’s nothing to worry about, and nothing to stress them. They can just focus on their happiness. She kisses Valentin, and Sasha says she needs to go. Nina leaves to see about dinner, and Obrecht says, so the wedding is going on as planned? and Valentin says, which begs the question, why would he jeopardize Nina’s happiness by harming Obrecht?
Kim understands why Drew doesn’t want the procedure done – he doesn’t want to risk his relationship with Oscar or Scout – but the medals are a great gateway to his past. Drew says, not just his. Shiloh’s redemption story hinges on Drew saving him. Now there’s another witness to prove he’s a liar.
Stella tells Jordan that she has to get to work. Jordan looks at her, and she says, what now? Jordan says her friend from forensics found something. Stella says she told Jordan to drop it, and she means it. Jordan says Stella might reconsider. Her friend used the same lab that the PCPD uses, and the information suggests Stella’s relation lives in the greater Port Charles area.
Ryan tells Ava that if she really believes the truth will set Kiki free, here it is. He doesn’t regret doing anything, if it meant being by Ava’s side and in her bed. Deep down, he thinks she feels the same way, but she says, not true. He says she consented to everything they did, and she says she consented to Doc. Ryan says she wouldn’t look twice at Doc. She consented to being with him. He suggests she look up the word deception. She tells him to consider taking that back if. He laughs, and tells her, ask herself why he would want her be less haunted by her love for him, than he is for her? She says she hates him, and he says, that’s two sides of… she knows the rest. If the psychic is right, they’re bound together for eternity, and he takes small comfort in that.
Obrecht tells Valentin, stop the petty torment and mind games. She knows he’s the one who tried to kill her. He says, cut the crap. If he wanted her dead, she’d be dead. He has a vested interest in Nina’s happiness. If she’s looking for who pushed her, look at someone else. It’s not him. Not this time.
Jason tells Sam that DOD is practically shut down. Shiloh’s followers are leaving, and his offshore assets are frozen. Sam says the Pledges were destroyed, and Shiloh has been stopped from going near Wiley. Jason thinks Shiloh still has another trick up his sleeve. They’ve just got to figure out what it is.
Curtis goes into Drew’s office, and finds the credenza open and ransacked. He makes a call saying he needs some guys there now.
Someone meets Shiloh, but we don’t see who they are. He asks if they got it. He’s handed the flashdrive, and he says, nice work.
Tomorrow, Alexis wonders how her sex life became a hot topic, Valentin says Cassandra has resurfaced, and Drew tells Shiloh that he’s going to find out what happened in Afghanistan.
The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – The Reunion – Part Three
Almost done with The Real Housewives of Self-Righteous Hypocrisy.
Backtracking a little, Camille says Denise told her to tell her daughter that she’s an effing liar in regard to Teddi’s snub. Denise says Camille needs to take a second. Because this is not good. Andy asks what was going through Denise’s mind at lunch, when Camille trash talked everyone. Denise starts saying she was uncomfortable, and Camille gets up. She says, it’s a set-up, and leaves, taking off her dress as she goes. Denise asks if she’s on something. She’s so angry. Backstage, Camille calls them nasty bitches, and Denise says, she’s effing nuts. Denise never said that.
Andy goes backstage, and Camille says, that’s it. She’s done. Andy asks, what set-up? and she says Denise did say she cursed at her kids. We view some unseen footage that backs up what Camille is saying. On stage, Denise says she never told Camille to tell her daughter that she’s a liar. Erika says she’s speechless, and she’s rarely speechless. LisaR says Camille didn’t want them at her wedding. We go back to last week, where Camille said it was just for production. Camille tells Andy that they were nasty about her wedding, but Andy says, they thought it was great. Camille points out that Teddi claimed the best part of her wedding was leaving. We see a clip from the Watch What Happens Live aftershow where Teddi says just that.
Kyle says, Camille was so mean, and LisaR says, no one ever said they didn’t want her somewhere. I find that hard to believe. Camille tells Andy that they want her to jump on the LVP hate train. She understands how they feel, but she still misses LVP. Can’t she say something nice about LVP without them jumping on her? She feels ganged up on because she didn’t gang up on LVP. Kyle says Camille isn’t being genuine, and Andy tells Camille that he thinks they feel she says one thing to them, and another behind their backs. Camille says, they all talk about each other. Andy thinks if she was consistent, there would be no issue. Camille doesn’t know what issue Denise has with her, and Andy says Camille just said she didn’t like Denise. LisaR says Camille is much angrier than she realized. Andy asks Camille to come back for more torture.
Andy goes back, and tells the women that Camille feels they want her to talk sh*t about LVP. He told her they wanted her to be consistent, but she’s upset because they trashed her wedding on the aftershow. Kyle says, it’s Camille on season one times ten. Camille returns, and Kyle says, it’s so awkward, but LisaR says they’re glad Camille came back. Andy asks why Camille is crying, because either he’s a total idiot or wants to make her cry harder. She says it’s been hard for her to talk to them. She was very hurt after the wedding. LisaR asks if she’s okay, and if there’s something more going on. Camille says she was really hurt, and LisaR says, it was a great wedding. Camille reminds Teddi that she said the best part was the departure. It broke her heart. She thought they had fun. Teddi says they did enjoy it, and they being shady. They’d heard terrible things that Camille said. She didn’t know Camille was mad during the camping trip. She never said anything. Camille says she was just mad in that moment, but Teddi says she didn’t just talk about it once. Camille says she’s had a lot going on. She doesn’t even remember everything that happened specifically.
On top of the large volume of flashbacks, they also keep overlapping when we come back from a commercial break. Did they seriously not have enough material without LVP? Kyle tells Camille that she said she didn’t want to invite them to her wedding. She’s feeling hurt, and it’s confusing. Camille says she’s confused too. Kyle says she knows Camille is a good person; just be honest. She knows it’s hard sometimes. It was hard for her go to LVP and be honest. Andy says Camille made serious claims about Dorit’s financial status, but said she was protecting her. Camille says she didn’t want to say anything, and Dorit says, but she did. We flash back to that, and Erika says, it was a thinly veiled threat; I know something about you. Camille says, it was irresponsible, hurtful, and mean. She realized after she said it, and felt horrible. Dorit says she’ll always have shadow of doubt, and can’t trust what Camille says is real. Andy tells Camille that she said she doesn’t care for Denise. Was there something specific? Camille says she didn’t like what Denise said about her daughter lying. Denise insists she told Camille to reassure her daughter, and tell her Teddi was just in a hurry. She doesn’t think she would say anything like that, but if she did, she’s sorry.
Andy brings up the controversial conversation about Brett Kavanaugh, and how it took a personal turn. We flash back to that, and he asks if Camille feels misunderstood about what she said. Camille says she feels people need be heard and believed. LisaR says she thinks having the conversation was a good thing. She thinks it’s important that victims be believed; her mom is one. She’s a survivor, and so is Camille. Erika is a survivor. Erika says Camille is a survivor of a lot of things. Andy asks what it was like for Camille, walking through the embers of her house. She says they were lucky to salvage some stuff, like baby pictures. She starts to cry as we flash back. Andy says he can’t imagine, and everyone says they’re sorry. Erika says but Camille does have the ability to rebuild. Thank God she’s safe, and she’s got the kids. Camille says she lost Scott too; her assistant and confidant is gone. Andy says it struck him when she said she lost her house, but losing a friend is more difficult.
Andy says Denise had to run out of the house at a moment’s notice. Her house was okay, but all of their belongings had smoke damage. Denise says every piece of clothing, but it’s stuff. For her it was her kids and her dogs. It was moving so fast, and they had to get out. Andy says it’s nice that the other women brought them clothes. Camille says, it was very kind. Andy stirs the pot by reminding Camille that she said Denise doesn’t understand the heartache. Her rented house didn’t burn down. Denise doesn’t know the reason. She thinks they’ve been empathetic. She and Camille talked several times. Who gives sh*t if she was renting? They’ve been figuring out where to live, and she wondered where this was coming from; what did she do to Camille that Camille thinks she’s not empathetic? Camille doesn’t know; she has no answer. She’s sorry. Denise says, this is where we think before we speak, making me want to smack her, even if I agree. She says Camille said some extremely hurtful things that had no truth to them. She’s talking out of her ass. Denise says she’s been nothing but nice, kind, and supportive. Camille says she’s had a difficult year. She doesn’t have a home; her family has been displaced; and her mom is very sick. She’s overwhelmed. LisaR comes over, and sits next to Camille, putting an arm around her. Camille says she was nervous to come. Denise wonders if she needs to take a minute, but Camille says she’ll be okay. LisaR says she’s been through a lot. Andy asks if she regrets being so open in her opinions. Camille says she’s been wrong, and she’s sorry if she’s been cruel. Andy suggests they take a break, and air the room out.
Andy says the jet setting housewives took their wanderlust to the next level. We flash back to their Bahamas trip, France, and camping. A viewer says Kyle having a Rolex postmated to the dinner table was the diva behavior to which she aspires. Andy asks if she needs Mauricio’s permission to make a purchase. Kyle says, first of all, she had the watch delivered that was because the shop was going to be closed, and for a big purchase, she checks with Mauricio, and he does the same. Erika says she doesn’t buy her own jewelry because Tom likes to do it. Dorit says, anything over $10K. Oh yeah. For me too. Andy asks how much Camille’s wedding cost, and she says, $120K. Her first wedding was closer to a million, but a lot was spent on security. A viewer can’t believe the spent $700 on groceries for one night when they went camping. Andy asks what happened to the leftovers, and Teddi says they donated them to the other campers. Everyone talks about how often they personally grocery shop, which is more than you’d think, but I would too. He asks what LisaR had packed in her bag, and she says, everything. We flash back to Erika asking, what’s in the bag? A dead body? Vanderpump? Erika says LisaR is their resident pharmacy – in a good way. Andy says people were surprised they were without a glam squad in Provence. Erika says they were fine; they’re capable. He asks when Kyle was more hammered, clubbing or the wine tasting, and she says, Provence. We flash back to her helping Teddi up the stairs. Erika doesn’t know how they were still walking upright. Kyle says they also had extreme jet lag. In nine years, it was the most she’d consumed, and the worst it’s gotten. Andy tells her, that’s saying something.
And in the moment we all knew was coming, we flash back to Puppygate and the Radar Online article. Dorit says it was no longer about the dog, but about her friendship with LVP. We see Kyle’s involvement, and her wondering how she was going to say LVP had nothing to do with it, when she’d been accused of it before. We go way back to the reunion where Adrienne said LVP had leaked a story. We see the beginning of LVP’s argument with Kyle, and LVP asking Camille if she’ll have to take a lie detector test. Andy says a practicing attorney told them the test was 70% accurate, and not admissible in court. Erika says, Tom weighed in, and said they were unreliable, but can be good if the right person [administers] them. Dorit is also suddenly a font of information about the tests. Denise wonders how LVP found it. Andy says he’s skeptical about how Kyle found out, and asks if she’s sure production didn’t tell her about it. Kyle says the family of one of her daughter’s friends was burglarized, and they had the construction workers take one. Andy asks why she’d dispute it’s validity, and Kyle says they’ve used it with workers, and someone failed who she knew didn’t do it. I’m wondering how she knows that for sure, but okay. I’m also guessing the test would be more likely to err in this direction if the person was super nervous. Kyle says the friend said the lady with the dog was there. LVP did a practice run, then had production film it. Andy asks why they think LVP had a trial run, and Kyle says, to see if she passed. Erika says, so when the cameras showed up, she gave a great performance. Andy tells them the boss at Radar said LVP wasn’t the source, and has never been an anonymous source. Kyle says someone in that position wouldn’t normally make statements unless they’re a friend. She doesn’t think Radar is losing sleep over whether LVP leaked a story or not. Camille asks if Denise thinks it could be someone from the center. Denise says, maybe. LisaR says LVP isn’t stupid enough to make the call herself. She’d have someone else do it. She says LVP talks through the press. That’s how she announced she was leaving the show. Andy talks about LVP’s digs at them via social media. Kyle says they’ve been accused of bullying LVP, but haven’t stooped that low. We see a clip of LVP joking about Erika tucking, and the mini backlash that followed it. It’s pointed out by a viewer that Erika talks about her d*ck on the show, so what’s the difference? Erika says LVP was taking a swipe at her and being funny, but hurt a viable community. I love how it’s always someone who isn’t a member of a viable community, uses that for their own agenda. Andy says, considering LVP’s brother had committed suicide, viewers felt it was a pile-on when LVP wasn’t in the best state of mind. We flash back to one of the few times we’ve seen LVP cry. Kyle says they all have empathy, and Dorit says they spoke a lot, almost every day. LisaR doesn’t think they were mean girls or they bullied LVP. Kyle says LVP’s Behavior wasn’t a new thing. Andy tells them LVP said she wasn’t watching the show. Teddi says, when you’re surrounded by people who tell you what you want to hear, you lose the ability for self-reflection.
Andy says LVP and Kyle’s rollercoaster of a relationship came to the end of its run. We flash back to their friendship, and LVP saying they’re partners in crime, and end with that miserable fight, which I’d love to never see again. Kyle cries, and says, it’s sad. It’s sad LVP isn’t there. She paid the ultimate price by being honest. She has thought about how it might have played out if she hadn’t told LVP. Dorit says, it’s a sad end. Andy asks what the prediction is for the future. Kyle says she had thought LVP would show up. Camille cries too. Andy says he hates to see it. Since he’s so choked up, without even missing a beat, he says, Ken’s infamous farewell went viral with the #GoodbyeKyle challenge. We see clips of various people saying, goodbye, Kyle, Harry Hamlin and Kris Jenner among them. Andy asks what the intention was, and Kyle says she was being trolled on Twitter, and people were using the hashtag. Instead of taking it, she decided to make a joke out of it. She says it’s another example of LVP making her look bad. Her sister Kathy was at their house, and even though LVP acted wounded, they were laughing about it. She thinks LVP thought it was funny. She says LVP has amazing qualities, and you take the good with the bad with friends. Andy says he’ll leave it there. He thanks Camille, who says it was heart wrenching. She had a lot of emotions going on, and she’s sorry if she hurt anyone. She adds that she adores Kyle, and they hug. LisaR gives Camille kudos for showing up.
Andy says in the final moments, he wonders what the most surprising revelation was for the newest Housewife. Denise says the friendships between the women. Also the friendships she formed. She knows they’d be there for her, and vice versa. In LA, that’s something wonderful to have. Andy says that in an interview, Erika says she allowed herself form a sisterhood, something she hadn’t had before. Does she think she’s changed? Erika thinks they’ve all changed. Dorit says her friendships were challenged, and Andy asks if she feels secure. She says she does in this group, throwing one last dig at LVP. Andy asks if Teddi still feels pressured to be the moral compass for her friends. Teddi says she’s learned a lot, about her friends and herself. It was a good wake-up call. Andy reminds LisaR that last season, she was the nicest effing version of LisaR. What about this season. She asks what he says, and he tells her that he’d say she’s just an a-hole with iconic hair and lips, which I assume is referring to some earlier joke. Or Andy is being totally rude. LisaR says she thinks she was forthcoming. He says for Kyle, the season ended a long friendship with LVP. How else does she want it to be remembered? She says she’s been asked a lot how she can still be doing the show, but she has fun with the women. Even though a door closed, she doesn’t know what the future holds. They’ve all bonded, and opened up. They’ve shared more than they ever have, and she laughed so much. Andy begs to open LVP’s birthday present, and Kyle says okay, but he has to put the bow back on. It’s from Manolo Blahnik. Andy takes out a pink belt with a sparkly buckle. Teddi suggests he wants for the clubhouse, but Kyle says she’s sending it. She thought she was going to give it to LVP today.
Tequila shots appear, and Andy says they’re well-earned. They’ve been troopers. It was a wild season, but he’s glad they got closure. It was a nice way to end it. He asks who’s going to lead them in a toast, and Denise says, Queen Kyle. Kyle says, to friendships, and being honest with each other, and being there for each other, and continuing to grow in their friendships. Dorit says she’s grateful for them, and everyone clinks glasses. Andy thanks them for a great season.
🍸 My Own Wrap-Up…
I’m sad that I’m glad this is over. I remember thinking during the first episode of the entire franchise, The Real Housewives of Orange County, that this was the future of television. There had been reality TV before. While most of us don’t remember the Loud family – stars of An American Family on PBS in the early 70s – although their show has been rerun from time to time. I spent one New Year’s Day hungover and fascinated with it. Probably the most popular up until now is The Real World, which was actually a good show before it became the hot-tub-drunk-sex show. People had lives and jobs and meaningful interactions, both with their housemates and people on the outside. But for some reason, when the Housewives began, the world was ready for a change in programming, and here we are.
I’ve never missed an episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. While I’ve let some Wives fall by the wayside – looking at you, Atlanta and Potomac – and there were others I struggled to find – The Real Housewives of Sydney, anyone? – I’ve stuck with these women through thick and thin. There has been no season, however, that made me want to stop watching until now.
I’ve joked that if LVP would adopt an older child, I’d be on her doorstep in a heartbeat, and said she can do no wrong, but I’m not daft. She doesn’t walk on water, and we all have faults. But the relentless raking her over the coals was insane. They even talked about her throughout most of the reunion, which I might add, must have been lacking in material since a good 40% of it was flashbacks. With another 40% given to talking about LVP, it didn’t leave much. Maybe because there isn’t much to leave.
In a year where her brother committed suicide, her mother died (albeit after filming), several of her dogs went to the Bridge, Giggy was diagnosed with a heart condition, she opened three restaurants, and nearly single-handedly brought attention to the dog meat trade, these women decided to make LVP a target because she may or may not have pointed out the obvious. Dorit did an effing stupid and thoughtless thing, disregarding a dog adoption contract because she wanted to circumvent the rules. Maybe she didn’t want to face LVP, maybe it was just inconvenient, but in giving the dog to what she thought was a new, loving home, it ended up in a shelter. Dorit was wrong. Period. Camille was the only one to point this out, but since she was Enemy Number Two, no one listened.
I don’t believe LVP leaked the story, but that’s not to say it didn’t come from her staff at Vanderpump Dogs, or that she didn’t turn a blind eye. The really stupid thing is, anyone who cares would have ended up knowing anyway, because, the show. So in the long run, the whole thing was immaterial. Dorit wailed over the backlash, to which I say, don’t do something stupid in the first place, and after that, nothing LVP could have done would have been enough to convince them she wasn’t lying. Even a lie detector test was found fault with. Yes, I’m completely aware they’re inadmissible in court, but passing one while still being guilty is pretty difficult. Ain’t nobody got time for that, least of all LVP. When Kyle flat-out said she didn’t believe LVP, the friendship was done, and LVP was done with the show.
The whole thing was depressing, and I don’t think any of them came out looking good. Regardless of how much of a hand LVP did or did not have to do with the Radar story, she didn’t deserve the persistent sniping and continual jabs throughout the season, especially after the year she had. Even Brandi was dragged in for her nasty two cents. It was a huge disappointment to me that she’s good friends with Denise Richards, who I’ve liked up until now. I still like her, but I think she came in knowing nothing, and probably still doesn’t. I, too, believe even a hooker deserves Thanksgiving dinner, but I’m not going out for drinks with her, and listen to her opinions about LVP. (That was a joke. I’m sure the hooker was much more of a lady than Brandi.) I think Denise likes to take in strays, and I’m not just referring to dogs and cats. The worst part was how no one could understand why LVP no longer wanted to be friends with Kyle, when Kyle said she believed LVP was lying. They didn’t seem to get that, from that time forward, LVP would be wondering if Kyle believed anything she said. So what would be the point of a friendship? LisaR also got the nasty consolation prize, for giving Kim the finger and calling her a c-word while dressed as Erika Jayne, and using that as an excuse. And I don’t even particularly like Kim.
I also found it creepy how the group passed LVP’s symbolic crown to Kyle, making her queen of the group. She pretended to be all humble, but I’m pretty sure, deep down, she was pleased. While I’m curious who will have the bullseye on their back next season, I’ll have to read about it in someone else’s recap. If I even do that.
🎼 No. Just No…
LuAnn as Mama Morton? Here’s the scoop on the Countess being in Chicago on Broadway. As I thought, not quite. And I’ll bet she needs more rehearsals and coaching. She’d possibly need someone singing in her ear.
🐶 Working Double Dog Duty…
While my partner in pup care works overtime. So the answer to this question is, me.