Category Archives: cooking competition

May 21, 2020 – Nina Makes a Decision, Dorinda In Denial, a Japanese Tradition & Nice


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

On the phone, Laura tells someone that it’s important to the city and her personally. She needs the details of Nelle’s lawsuit against the hospital. She sees Robert at the bar, and says if he doesn’t mind her saying it, it doesn’t look like he’s gotten much rest. Is he throwing himself into work? He says, it seems that way. The reports of Holly’s death have been greatly exaggerated. She asks if he has any new information, and he says his gut instinct tells him Holly is very much alive.

Maxie says the shots of Sasha are spectacular. She shouldn’t have doubted that Sasha would find a way to rally. Sasha is glad she’s happy, and Maxie says Sasha was a true wreck, but found a way to see the blue skies. Valentin comes in and looks at the photos. He’s pleased they have a signature look they can capitalize on. Maxie says Lucy led her to believe Valentin was going to be a silent partner, and he says he’s not going to make a habit of it. The launch is soon, and he wanted to see the literal face of the product. He’s leaving the beauty promotion in Maxie’s capable hands while he focuses on other ventures.

Ned talks to Tracy on the phone, and says, a third party is after Dylan’s shares… He’s trying to trace them. Apparently they’re searching for other parties willing to sell. He’ll let her know if he finds anything further.

Also on the phone, Olivia says no one’s ever said anything to her like that before. Brook walks in, but Olivia doesn’t know she’s there. Olivia says, they see through to her soul like no one else can. Brook clears her throat, and Olivia says she’s got to go. Brook asks if Olivia is going to pretend she didn’t walk in on an emotional phone call, and Olivia says, it’s not what it looks like. Brook says, it sounds like Olivia is having an affair behind her dad’s back.

Jax goes to Nina’s office, and she wonders if he’s checking up on her. He asks if she’d be upset if he was. He knows it’s a big day, and she asks if he’s there to wish her good luck. She doesn’t know if she should stand up for Nelle, but if she doesn’t, who else will?

Nelle swears to tell the truth with her hand on the Bible. Willow grasps Michael’s hand, and Carly shakes her head.

Laura tells Robert, she doesn’t understand. Did the ship not sink? He tells her, that’s not what he’s saying. Mac and Anna didn’t give him the whole story. The Bureau has a theory about the ship. Laura asks if Mac and Anna believe Holly survived, and he says he didn’t say that. They don’t know his ex-wife the way he does, but until he gets information on the Bureau’s theory about who sunk the ship, he can’t find whoever’s holding her. Does Laura think he’s nuts?

Olivia says she’s not cheating on Brook’s dad; she loves Ned very much. Brook says, when she came in, she clearly heard Olivia tell someone no one has ever said that to her before. Atrocious song lyrics, but it sounds like an affair. Olivia says, this is her house, and she doesn’t need to explain herself. Brook says, it’s Monica’s house. Alan gave it to her. (I laugh.) Olivia says, so they’re both guests in Monica’s house, and Brook says, if Olivia doesn’t want to tell her, she’ll tell her dad what she heard and he can judge for himself. Olivia says Ned has enough on his plate, not to mention the trouble Brook’s caused. How many times has she been arrested? Does the PCPD have a cell with her name on it yet? Brook says, they were misunderstandings, and Olivia asks if that’s what Brook is calling assault and disturbing the peace. She’s not having an affair. She was talking to a psychic.

Valentin tells Maxie, he brings good news. Deception is going to be one of the main sponsors of the 2020 Nurses Ball. Maxie says, the exposure alone will be huge, but she also thought it would be months before their launch party. Valentin says he’s excited about the shots, and Maxie tells Sasha, whatever she did to get her head back in the game, it worked. Sasha flashes back to the being given the vial of cocaine; a little something to get her through the shoot.

Jax says Nina told him that she had second thought; he’d like her to lean into them. She asks if he thinks it’s a mistake. Doesn’t he think Nelle deserves a second chance? He says, it’s true people change, but if she’s wrong, Wiley will pay the price. She knows the risk. Not only will a child suffer, she’ll feel responsible, and he doesn’t wish that on her. She says if she doesn’t stand up for Nelle, if she treats Nelle like everyone else does, and Nelle loses, there will be virtually no chance for Nelle to turn her life around.

Martin asks Nelle to tell the court how she felt when her baby was horribly and shamefully stolen. Diane objects, saying Martin isn’t asking questions, just giving his Southern fried opinion. The judge sustains it, but tells her to please refrain from descriptive adjectives. Martin asks what Nelle’s reaction was when the son she previously thought was dead, was alive. She says she was confused at first, and so overwhelmed that her little boy was alive. But she was also incredibly hurt to think Brad orchestrated the entire thing. She thought he was her friend. He switched her baby with the boy he adopted, and watched her grieve for nearly two years. How could he be so cruel? And when he asked Michael to be Wiley’s godfather, it was untenable. (Apparently, Nelle reads.) Martin says she wasn’t the only person hurt by Brad’s actions. Her new husband believed he was Wiley’s grandfather. She says, Jules bonded with the boy he believed was his grandson. Once he found out, the pain brought them closer together. Sam and Carly look at each other. She says they were shocked, but it gave them a connection – and possibly something more.

Brook asks where Olivia found a psychic? Late night TV? She laughs, and Ned says, enough. Brook says who spends good money on someone sitting in a call center? Olivia says the psychic isn’t in a call center. She’s well-renowned, and comes highly recommended. She’s sure it’s totally legit, and how else can she find out about Dante? Brook says she’s so sorry. She didn’t stop to think. Olivia says she never does, does she? She walks away, and Ned follows. He says he knows how bad she wants to be reassured about Dante, and Olivia says she doesn’t know what to do. Her letters come back unopened, and she has no way of knowing if he’s okay, or if he’s getting better. He says he’s sorry he hasn’t been available. He’s been so busy with ELQ, obsessing over who’s trying to mount a hostile takeover of the family’s shares, he didn’t see she’s obviously in pain.

Sasha tells Maxie, it was important to Deception, and a chance to prove herself. If the company does well, so will she. She knows a lot of people don’t trust her after she deceived Nina, and wanted to use every trick in the book. Maxie says that’s why they’re lucky to have her. Maxie suddenly stumbles a little, and Peter asks if she’s okay. She says she’s just a little lightheaded; probably too much coffee. Peter says, executive decision. She needs to take a break. She says, a short one, and then back to work. They leave, and Valentin asks if Sasha is okay.

Martin asks if Nelle and Julian are in love. Nelle says she would never speak for her husband. She respects him too much for that, so she’ll let him answer. What she will say is that Julian loves Wiley deeply. She knows he’d do anything to protect and keep her son safe. They have that in common, and the way Julian talks, she knows he loves Wiley abundantly, and will make an excellent co-parent. Sam looks sick, and Nelle says, Julian loves Wiley as much as she does. She could never find anything more appealing than that.

Nina tells Jax, she knows what it’s like to have no one in your corner, and hope things work out; what it’s like to be lonely. Jax says there are a lot of words he’d use in relation to Nelle, but Nelle isn’t lonely. Nina says Nelle feels abandoned, and with no one there to back her up, she might lash out. She might go back to prison. He says, if she does, it will be her own fault. Nina isn’t responsible. Nina remembers asking Nelle if she’s blackmailing Julian, and Nelle says she had to resort to desperate measures. Nina understands what mothers do to keep their child safe, and no one should be able to take them away.

Martin asks why Nelle feels she deserves sole custody of Wiley, and Nelle says she’s already lost two years with him. Then Michael cruelly kept Wiley away from her. He’s selfish and entitled; not lessons she wants passed on to her child. She’s paid her debt to society, has an amazing job at Crimson, roots in the community, and a husband who loves her son as much she does. She wants to dedicate the rest of her life to making sure Wiley has the home family deserves. Martin tells her, well said. He has no more questions. Diane says Nelle stated she has roots in the community, and wants to dedicate the rest of her life to make sure Wiley has the best family possible. Nelle says, that’s exactly what she wants. Diane asks her to tell the court, why on the night she allegedly discovered her son was alive, she raced to the apartment where Willow was taking care of him, and assaulted Willow? And then attempted to abduct Wiley, and take him out of the country. Martin objects, saying it’s inflammatory. Diane is clearly badgering the witness with pointless verbal assaults and unfounded accusations.

Laura tells Robert, they all believed Nikolas was dead, and were proven wrong. She’s the last person to give up hope of survival. She asks if Robert has any proof other than his gut feeling? Is there evidence? I have to interject, there’s about the same amount of evidence as there was with Nikolas – no body. Robert says the evidence is there, but he needs to find it. He could use a partner. He tried Luke, but his line has been disconnected. He asks if she has Luke’s current contact, but she says, sorry; she doesn’t. She thinks his best bet is to go through Tracy.

Olivia says, since when is someone is making a play for ELQ? and Ned says he’s had his suspicions for a while. Nelle sold her shares to an anonymous third party, and Tracy has rejected several offers for Dylan’s shares. He asks if they can talk about it later, and she says, of course (🍷). He tells her, Brook had no business eavesdropping, much less criticizing, but he’s not sure it’s the best way for Olivia to get help. Olivia says she feels helpless. Rocco had a Take Your Dad to School Day. He says, and Rocco didn’t have Dante. She says, even worse. Rocco could have taken Ned or Sonny, but he took Dustin. She confronted Lulu about why she was pushing Dustin on Rocco, and Lulu said it was Rocco’s idea. She’s only been seeing Dustin a couple of months, and Rocco is already looking at Dustin like a father figure. It’s like her son is being erased. If that happens, what motivation will Dante have to get better or come home? She feels like she’s running out of time. She gets that people think psychics are stupid or silly, but the psychic is the only person telling her it’s going to be okay. He says, if what’s happening to Dante happened to Brook, he’d go crazy, but doesn’t she think it’s possible the psychic is just telling her what she wants to hear?

Brook calls Linc, and says she saw his social media. She knows he’s staying in Port Charles, and needs a face to face with him.

Valentin says, he gathers Michael married Willow, but Sasha doesn’t reply. She picks up her bag, and he says, sorry about that. She says her personal life is personal. Their break-up had nothing to do with Deception, and doesn’t affect her role as the face of the brand or as a partner. Valentin says he genuinely wanted to check on her. He’s been where she is, and knows what it’s like to lose somebody based on something you’ve done. Nothing is ever as black and white as it looks on the surface.

Jax says Nina’s impulse to stand up for Nelle is admirable, but he doesn’t think Nelle is capable of accepting kindness; she’s too damaged. The worst outcome would be if she raised Wiley to follow in her footsteps, and he turns vindictive, and incapable of love. Nina’s phone makes noise, and she says she had an alert on it. If she’s going to testify, she needs to leave now.

Martin says there’s no evidence that his client was trying to flee the country; the charges were dismissed. Diane says, they were dismissed without prejudice, meaning they can be filed again, like with Nelle’s attack on Willow. She asks if Nelle loves her husband, and Nelle says, with every fiber in her being. Diane says, as of this morning, it would seem. She has no further questions. Michael asks what about sticking to the plan, and Diane tells him it never hurts to remind the court of the plaintiff’s alleged kidnapping charges. Martin calls Julian to the stand. Julian tells Nelle, he thought he wasn’t supposed to testify, and she says, buck up. Plans change, and it’s showtime. She doesn’t have to remind him what’s at stake. He sighs, and gets up.

Martin says there are a lot of opinions on their marriage, but the only two that are relevant belong to Julian and Nelle. He asks if it’s true that they want to give Wiley a loving stable home, and that’s why they married, and Julian says, true. Martin asks if it’s also true that Julian was the nurturing figure in Wiley’s life when he’s son Lucas tragically ended up in a coma. Julian says, when Lucas was in a coma, his husband Brad was an emotional wreck, and he stepped in to fill the void. Martin asks if it’s fair to say he loves Wiley as much as Lucas, and Julian says, that’s exactly how he feels. Martin says the elephant in the room is Julian’s prison record. He was sent to Pentenville. How long since he was released? Julian says, three years, and Martin asks, in that time, has he had any brush with the law? Julian says, not so much as a speeding ticket, and Martin asks what he does for a living. He says own Charlie’s pub, and Martin says, it has historical significance in Port Charles. Julian supposes it does, and Martin asks if it’s fair to say he cleaned up his life. Julian says he has, and Martin says they all commend him for it. He has no further questions, and Diane says, yes, the elephant in the room. Drug trafficking, assault, extortion, attempted murder… Martin says, not all of those have been proven, and she says, there was enough evidence to convict Julian. She asks who Alexis is to Julian, and he says, his ex-wife. Diane says, whose throat he held a knife to, and threatened to kill, as well as helping his sister (the other) Olivia try to blow up Port Charles. Julian says he was forced to do those things, and Diane says, he’s perfect for Wiley. She’s done with the witness. Nelle tells Martin, do something.

Maxie picks at her food, and pushes the plate away. Peter says she barely ate, and she says she’s not hungry. He doesn’t want to tell her what to do, but if she’s under the weather, maybe she should see a doctor. She says she loves that he’s looking out for her, but she doesn’t need a doctor. It’s just… He says, what is it?

Olivia tells Ned, they’ll have to agree to disagree. Her opinion about psychics is just as valid as his. He says he’s not trying to change what she believes, but he doesn’t want to see anyone take advantage of her pain. She says it’s the only thing giving her comfort. The doorbell rings. It’s Robert, who apologizes for showing up unannounced. He promises it won’t take long. Olivia tells him, come in, and Ned asks, what’s going on? Robert says, it’s not public knowledge, but Holly was on a boat that sank, and is believed to be dead. Olivia says she’s sorry, and Ned asks what he can do to help. Robert says, there are certain discrepancies in the Bureau’s report that don’t add up. He’d like to ask Luke for help, but the only way to contact him is through Ned’s mother. Ned says he’s been down that road with Luke, and Luke gets scratchy if he gives out the number. He’ll call his mother, and let her know what’s up. Robert says he appreciates it, and Ned goes to make the call. Olivia asks how Robert is holding up, and he says he hates every minute. The only thing worse than accepting the fact Holly is lost is that he’ll never see her again. Why does he have the feeling he’s not the only one who’s been through the wringer today?

Linc and Brook meet at the MetroCourt. He says he’s surprised she wants to hook up with him, but she says the only thing she has in mind is business. He says their business was concluded when she bought herself out. She says he never wanted her shares. He was just a front for a third party, and she wants to know who.

Sasha says she wishes she could trust Valentin. He says, it’s not tough. Talk to Lulu. She says according to Lulu, he’s always wrong. She posed as Nina’s daughter for the money, but she also knew there was no girl being cheated out of an inheritance. She knew he truly loved Nina, and the more she got to know Nina, it was clear Nina loved him back. Even after all this, she still has sympathy for what he was trying to accomplish. Sometimes you have to do the wrong thing for the right reason. He says that’s why he hired her; she’s a good person, and he knew she’s be a good daughter for Nina. She asks if he’s not sorry, and he says he is, and he’s sorry she’s still paying the price. If it’s any consolation, the brand is going to be a massive success, and make her a very wealthy woman. She says, too bad money can’t buy happiness, and Valentin agrees. He leaves, and Sasha flashes back to Michael telling her that he loves her, and her saying she loves him too.

Julian finds Sam in the hallway messing with her phone. She turns to him, and he says, Sam, please… She hauls off and smacks him good. As we all want to.

Julian tells Sam, he understands why she slapped him, but let him explain. She says, and make a bunch of excuses? Don’t bother. He asks her to hear him out. She says she told Lucas about his new stepmom. He says he’d hoped to tell Lucas himself, but she says she saved him the time. Lucas’s exact words were, Julian is dead to him, and after listening to his ridiculous testimony, she feels the same way. He says, Sam, please… and she says, don’t Sam please her anything. The worst part is he used the most painful thing that ever happened to Lucas against him, and allowed Nelle to weaponize Wiley to use against Michael. If Nelle gets custody, she was going to say she’d never talk to him again, but been there, done that. He’s dead to her too. He says everything he’s done, he did for his kids, and she says she’s not on that list anymore. She and Lucas are better off without him in their lives, and if Leo eventually comes to the same conclusion, they’ll be there to support him.

Olivia gives Robert some coffee, and he asks if she wants to talk about it. She says Brook overheard her call a psychic, and one thing led to another. She told Ned, and he was nicer than Brook was, but ultimately, he thinks the same thing. Robert says, who’s to say she’s certifiable? Not him. He spent time in the outback, and the Aborigines are a very spiritual people. What we look upon as superstitious, they look at as a natural part of life. He asks what she hopes to find, and she says, Dante. She needs to have some hope that he’ll be okay, especially since the whole world is moving on without him. She has to keep fighting, and believing he’s okay. If the only person who gives her hope is a psychic, Robert must think she’s crazy. He says she doesn’t want to give up hope, and he doesn’t want to give up hope about Holly. There’s nothing crazy about that. Ned comes in, as Olivia takes Robert’s hand.

Brook tells Linc, it all makes sense. The way he stonewalled, then agreed to let her buy herself out. The shares weren’t for him. He’s the front man. Who’s pulling the strings? He says, whatever decision he made about the shares is none of her business. She asks who he sold them to. She’s not leaving until he gives her a name.

Valentin sees Laura at the MetroCourt, and she tells him that she’s curious. Did he get an invitation to Windymere for the unveiling of Ava’s portrait? He says he did. He thought it was a joke, but doesn’t know if it was Ava or Nikolas twisting the knife. She hopes he chooses not to go, for Charlotte’s sake. And Nikolas’s. He doesn’t need any more trouble, even though he’s asking for it. He says he threw it away. He doesn’t need to prove anything to anyone in Port Charles.

Julian goes back into the courtroom. Judge Lowe asks when they can expect Martin’s next witness, and Diane says, yes. How long are they supposed to wait for this mythical witness? Nina and Jax walk in, and Martin says, here she is now. Not so mythical after all. Quel disappointment.

Martin calls Nina to the stand. Jax sits next to Carly, who asks what the hell they’re doing. He says he has no idea.

Maxie looks at a calendar on her phone, while Peter takes a business call. When he comes back, he says she hasn’t taken another bite. Is she sure she’s okay? She says, she’s sure it’s stress from work, but maybe he’s right, and she should see a doctor.

Sasha digs in her bag, and the woman who gave her the coke appears with another vial. She says, for next time, but Sasha says, it was a one-time thing. The woman says, keep it. You never know when you’ll need another boost.

Laura calls Anna, and leaves a message to give her a call when Anna has a few minutes to talk. She ran into Robert, and to be honest, she’s worried about him.

Ned comes back, and gives Robert the number to Luke’s latest burner phone, and says Luke is expecting his call. Robert thanks him, and says he appreciates it. Olivia tells Robert to look out for himself, and he tells her to do the same. After he leaves, Ned says Olivia seems like she’s feeling better, and she says she is. She guesses you never know who will come up with the right words to say.

Linc tells Brook, it was a one-time deal, and he has zero obligation to tell her anything. The person wants to remain anonymous. She says she still hasn’t gone public with what he did to her. Powerful men have lost careers because of me-too. He asks if she’s threatening him, and Valentin comes by. He says let him take it from here, and Linc leaves. He tells Brook, he’s been looking forward to this moment. He’s heard a lot about her.

Nina is asked if she’ll tell the truth. She hesitates. She looks at Jax, then looks at Nelle. She swears to tell the truth. So help her God.

There was no preview for Monday, but tomorrow’s GH is from April 1, 2015, and contains scenes from the original first episode in 1963.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Leah meets LuAnn for lunch. Both of them aren’t feeling well, with some kind of respiratory ailments. Hmm… In Leah’s interview, she says, the orchard trip was bullsh*t. They wait for Tinsley, and order in the meantime. LuAnn says, poor Sonja, and Leah says she did it to herself. We see a clip of Sonja throwing up in the limo, way too close to Tinsley. Leah says she loves crazy, but this is bad crazy. Dorinda, Sonja, even Ramona. LuAnn says, they have their issues.

Ramona, Dorinda, and Sonja go for a workout with Ramona’s instructor Bergen. Ramona says Bergen transformed her body. Dorinda says, yesterday was a long day. Bergen puts  them through their paces. How any of them can work out after what they consumed the day before is mind boggling. It’s not like they’re eighteen.

Leah tells LuAnn that she’s sympathetic and empathetic. Dorinda is grieving and dealing with the break-up, but to say what she did to Tinsley… Leah wonders where it’s coming from. LuAnn says, there’s a lot of judgment on Dorinda’s part. They have to step in and help figure it out. Tinsley joins them, also coughing.

Sonja says, this is the worst punishment ever. In her interview, she says, workouts shouldn’t even be legal. Dorinda says she thought it was beautiful yesterday, and Ramona says it was a beautiful setting. Dorinda says she thinks Ramona is concerned about Sonja, and Sonja says when she sees them go off rails. Ramona was overly friendly and flirtatious. Ramona says Sonja wasn’t in control, and past the point. She wants Sonja healthy and happy. Sonja says she has to be careful out in public. Sonja asks what was with Dorinda yelling at Tinsley, and Dorinda says Tinsley has played the victim and little girl enough. They could all be victims.

LuAnn say she’s had issues with all the women in the past, and Tinsley’s reaction is defensive and yelling. In her interview, LuAnn says, Tinsley does the wrong thing. She screeches, and Dorinda reacts with aggression because she’s annoyed. Leah thinks the real issue is that Tinsley was born into a life that Dorinda puts on a pedestal. LuAnn says, that doesn’t mean she can judge and get away with it. Leah says Tinsley has to stop being defensive. In Leah’s interview, she says, if you let people walk all over you, and don’t make them respect you, it’s never going to happen. If Tinsley stood up to Dorinda, and said, bitch, mind your own business, Dorinda would back off.  She says, Tinsley needs to thug her out, and LuAnn says Tinsley screams like a child having a tantrum. Tinsley stamps her foot, and says that’s just her.

Ramona tells Dorinda, Tinsley is mentally and emotionally not her age. She feels sorry for Tinsley. Dorinda says, God helps those who help themselves (which, BTW, is found nowhere in the Bible). In Ramona’s interview, she says, Dorinda thinks Tinsley plays the victim, but Dorinda is victimizing Tinsley. She tells Dorinda, it’s challenging to be around them. Tinsley is psychologically co-dependent, and Dorinda is frustrated. Dorinda needs to take a step back. Someone didn’t give Tinsley the right tools.

Tinsley says Dorinda is doing, and she’s reacting. Leah suggests an intervention, which doesn’t get a positive reaction. LuAnn says maybe at a health spa could be cool, as long as nothing gets broken. It’s totally up to Tinsley. Leah tells Tinsley not to go Cardi B, but go Dalai Lama. Cardi Lama.

Dorinda goes to see life coach Daryl. She tells him that she recognizes where her anger is coming from; it’s frustration, and it comes out because she wants a person to be the best they can be. In her interview, she says she started with Dr. Daryl three months ago, to help her process what’s going on. It became too much, and she’s not good at asking for help. She tells Daryl that she and Tinsley are too different for her to tolerate Tinsley. Daryl says they can be respectful when they’re face to face. All we see is what’s on the surface, when underneath is a whole world we don’t know about. Dorinda says she handled it poorly because she’s going through something. In Dorinda’s interview, she says dealing with the house and the break-up is having an effect on her personality. She’s been going through the house thing for a year, and she’s not just throwing away part of her life. It’s under water, and too painful to go through, plus, it’s ruined. Daryl sees that it stirs up her emotions. Dorinda says, it’s making her angry toward people. She felt lost after Richard died, but instead of taking it on, and allowing herself to be in a sea of it, she pretended everything was okay. She didn’t acknowledge the tremendous loss, from motherhood down, that was making her angry. In her interview, Dorinda says, she never put a period on the life she once had. In the process of resurrecting the house, she had to let go of a lot of things that, without knowing it, kept her tied to the past. Daryl says, she feels stuck, and Dorinda thinks that’s what got her here. She was trying to explain it to John. She’s trying to be completely selfish, and mindful of herself about what’s going on. Daryl asks about John, but Dorinda says she hasn’t seen him. In her interview, she says her daughter said she and John met too quickly after Richard’s death, but you do what you’ve got to do. She doesn’t regret it, and she’ll always love John, but she’s in a different place than she was when she met him. Daryl tells her to focus on what she needs to do. She needs time and space. She says she’s sort of enjoying it; it’s a relief to just worry about herself. Her life is quieter, and she needed the noise to go away. She can’t take it right now. Daryl says she’s always been taking care of someone else. She can still do that, but put her own needs first. She says, it feels good.

In LuAnn’s interview, she says when she heard it would be a spa day, she didn’t think of a Russian bath house. We see a clip of Leah on the phone, saying she wants get the group to go to a place in the neighborhood. It’s an oasis of relaxation, and good for detoxing. Maybe they can get to a better place. They definitely need something to relax as a group. In her interview, Leah says, it’s a New York institution, and has more character than an East Side spa.

Tinsley wanders in, and the woman at the reception desk gives her a locked box to put her jewelry in. Tinsley tells her, thanks, but no thanks. Leah orders lunch for the women, and meets Tinsley at the vodka bar. It’s really cool. There are glass jars of fresh herbs and fruits that the vodka is strained through. Tinsley tries a ginger shot, and declares it delicious. The bartender tells her that Russians don’t sip; they down the shot. She says she’s American.

In the limo, Dorinda tells LuAnn that she doesn’t go downtown much, and LuAnn say she’s not thrilled. Dorinda says the only time she’s down there is for a legal certificate, jury duty, or jail. I actually had jury duty there once. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, past Canal Street, there’s a weather change; it gets greyer. Geez. Elitist much? LuAnn says she’s only been down there when she got a summons. LuAnn says she had lunch with Leah and Tinsley, and Dorinda says she’s sure she was the topic. LuAnn says they were trying to figure out how to approach her, so they can make things better. Leah thought gangster was the way to go. Dorinda says that’s why she and Leah get along. Leah is also a great mother, and Dorinda respects that. Leah has been through a lot, and Dorinda doesn’t want to live in a fantasy world like Tinsley.

Everyone – clients and employees – is given a Gilligan type hat to protect your head, but I’m not sure from what. In Ramona’s interview, she says the spa is rustic, and not what she’s used to. It reflects how Leah is; rough around the edges. Ramona tells Tinsley to let things go with Dorinda. She told Dorinda that she was being a bully. Leah says, positive vibes only.  

As Dorinda and LuAnn approach the spa, Dorinda mentions there’s a strip club down the road. Sonja wanders in after them, and says, oh Lord. Inside, Ramona looks in the mirror and says she would pick up herself. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she’s going to let things go. She and Dorinda can stay on opposite sides of the room; that’s how they’re going to play it. Sonja comes in and asks if this is where jury duty is. In her interview, Sonja says, there’s graffiti everywhere. She avoids areas like this uptown, and downtown, it’s everywhere. Leah says they’re doing the dry sauna first. Sonja says, it’s like a prison; very bare bones. As they sit in the sauna, Dorinda informs Leah that Richard never knew she had fake boobs, and insists Leah feel them. They move on to a massage called banya. One of the couples on 90 Day Fiancé did this too. A couple of dudes hit them with branches as they lie on the tables. Ramona says she’s getting beaten by weeds. LuAnn feels like she’s being attacked by a tree. There’s some sexual banter, and in Leah’s interview, she says she thought she was horny. These women are more desperate than she is. In LuAnn’s interview, she says if she’s going to be beaten by a bush, she wants two hot guys to do it. I’m shocked they didn’t take this opportunity to show the clip that keeps on giving – LuAnn drunkenly falling into a bush. She says she’s turning over a new leaf, and probably wondering how she can include this in her cabaret act. Ramona thinks it’s a little sensual, and Leah says it’s the most action had in a while. In Sonja’s interview, she says she doesn’t know what this does, but after this, she might try S&M. Tinsley doesn’t want to do it (no surprise), and Leah tells her that she’s not being a part of things. In Tinsley’s interview, she says how does she know she’s not allergic to the branches, and it looks weird. Next is a foot scrub, which gets a little more interest, and now I’m jealous. They’re told to lie face down for the foot scrub, but Dorinda says, the last time she did that, she ended up with Hannah.

They go to a room with a private hot tub, where lunch is laid out; a beautiful spread of upscale Russian food, with caviar of course. LuAnn says crazy parties must go on in this room. The women descend on the caviar, since it’s something they recognize. Leah makes a toast, saying, when they first met, she thought she wouldn’t fit in as a downtown girl. But as time has gone by, they’ve opened up to her, and she appreciates it. They clink glasses. LuAnn thanks Leah for bringing them down there. She’s never seen anything like it. Ramona says she’s been looking into the group going to Newport, Rhode Island. LuAnn says, it’s gorgeous (truth! I’ve been there), and Ramona says it’s about a three-hour tour drive. In Leah’s interview, she says, before they plan another trip, they have some leftover drama to handle from the last trip. Nobody is talking about what they should be talking about. Leah says she feels like there’s an elephant in the room. She tells them, she speaks from the heart. After the orchard trip, she cried, and they need to acknowledge their sh*t. She saw people attacking each other a lot, and she thinks they should acknowledge that. Dorinda says she acknowledges it, and LuAnn says, Tinsley felt ganged up on, and rightly so. Dorinda says it was Tinsley’s flip comment that started it. We flash back to Tinsley at the orchard, mumbling about Dorinda being judgmental. Ramona says they want to figure out a way for that not to happen again. She tells Dorinda, there’s a pattern when she’s upset. She goes for the jugular, and hits below the belt. Ramona doesn’t think Dorinda recognizes it. Dorinda says Ramona does it all the time, so she can recognize it easily. In Ramona’s interview, she says there Dorinda goes, flipping it around, and pointing fingers at someone else, because she doesn’t want to recognize it in herself. Dorinda throws in how Ramona asked what she’d do if she found John texting other women when they were in a group. We flash back to that, and Ramona counters with the time Dorinda made a snide remark about a mug shot to LuAnn, and we flash back to that. Ramona says Dorinda does it all the time, and Dorinda tells Ramona that you don’t say things like that in a group, and she should pull Dorinda aside. In Dorinda’s interview, she calls Ramona a living vampire. She sucks the life out of people, Ramona tells Dorinda not to make it about her, and LuAnn says she’s not being specific. Leah says she wasn’t trying to blow up the table. She wanted to have a dialogue. She adores and respects all of them, and has a special bond with Dorinda. But she’s terrified that if she does something wrong, she’ll be on the other side of it. Ramona says Dorinda is scary, and Dorinda says she’s scared of Ramona. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, Dorinda goes for someone else, so it’s not about her. Tinsley says she respects Dorinda, and doesn’t judge her, and Dorinda insists she doesn’t do that. Everyone clinks glasses, probably because they gave up, and Leah says, a judgement free zone. Dorinda wanders off, and LuAnn says, a cease fire is good.

Leah’s sister Sarah comes by Leah’s place. In Leah’s interview, she says her sister is basically her times 100. They’re like twins, and share a bit of the same soul. It gets intense, but at this point they’re both adults, moms, and best friends. Leah tells Sarah that she has a salad from Pita Chip Guy. In her interview, Leah explains that Pita Chip Guy is a guy she’s dating who owns a kosher restaurant and pita bakery. She loves Jews; she can’t help it. He’s quirky, funny, and intelligent, and she wants to see where it goes. She tells Sarah that she took a nude picture with pita chips in a strategic place, and Pita Chip Guy sent the picture to her, thinking he was sending it to someone else. Sarah thinks he just made a mistake, and it’s not big deal. In her interview, Leah says she likes weirdos. She likes intellectuals, who are smart and funny, and likes dating ugly guys. She wants to be a beauty, and needs a beast. She asks Sarah how their mom and dad are, and Sarah says she doesn’t want to make Leah upset. Their mom is upset about her. In Leah’s interview, she says she and her mother are on speaking terms again. We flash back to Ramona advising her to talk to her mom in person. She says there was lingering  tension, and now they’re just leaving it alone. She tells Sarah that she thinks their mom wants her to stop telling her everything. Sarah says Leah’s way to connect has always been bad behavior, and Leah says she needs to learn how to stop that dynamic. In her interview, she says she’s caught in an old dynamic with her mother, even though they’re different and the relationship is different now. Sarah suggests Leah engage in conversation that’s about their mother, not her. Its basic.

Ramona has a girls night at her place, including Elyse, Nicole, and a couple of other women we don’t know. In her interview, Ramona says it’s a great way to build relationships. She has different groups over, and plays matchmaker with her women friends. She tells Elyse that she’s feeling finally her new home. Elyse asks if Ramona has condoms in her nightstand, and when Ramona says no, Elyse wants to check for herself. In her interview, Elyse says that Ramona likes to play the innocent Catholic girl, but then talks about how horny she is, and how she’s never been hotter. Ramona says when she was in a relationship, she kept them for her boyfriend. Sometimes he needed extras. She says she’s embarrassing herself, like that’s possible. Elyse says she wants to sleep with Ramona if it’s that good.

Sonja arrives, bringing Ramona a dress to replace the one with the broken zipper. We see a picture of Ramona in it, and it’s very pretty – a lace overlay on a nude foundation. Dorinda comes in next, and in Ramona’s interview, she says it was a sh*t show with her and Dorinda yesterday, but she’d already invited her, so she hopes Dorinda is in a good mood, and being the old Dorinda. In Sonja’s interview, she says when they were in the locker room at the spa, Ramona said she should lose ten pounds because she’s beautiful. She’s beautiful with the ten pounds. Dorinda tells Elyse about the spa, and Elyse says she knows it from when she worked in the area, and businessmen would take strippers there. Ramona doesn’t want Dorinda thinking she doesn’t respect her, and Dorinda says that what Ramona did was wrong. Ramona says Dorinda takes people down all the time. Dorinda whips out her phone, and asks if Ramona knows what schadenfreude means. Elyse says, you don’t wish ill on people, but if something bad happens, you get pleasure out of it. Dorinda says Ramona will bring up something from years ago, when they’re supposed to be friends. She needs support. Ramona says Dorinda lashes out when she’s questioned.

Ramona tries to get Dorinda to talk in private, but Dorinda won’t have it. In Ramona’s interview, she says it’s ironic that Dorinda doesn’t want her to bring things up in front of other people, but when they’re in front of people Dorinda doesn’t know, she’s going off like a crazy woman. Dorinda claims Ramona fat shamed Sonja, who called her up crying. Ramona loves for them to do well, but not better than she is. Ramona says Dorinda is so angry, and Dorinda says Ramona likes people’s misfortune. She likes to make people feel bad, and she’s a coward. Does she think it’s nice to bring up something from two years ago? Ramona asks if Dorinda thinks what she did to Tinsley was nice. She’s sorry Dorinda is unhappy, and sorry Richard died. She’s sorry Dorinda’s anniversary is coming up. Dorinda says she’s sorry so many men have come and gone in Ramona’s life. Elyse tells them to stop, and Dorinda jets with Sonja. Elyse says they’re both nuts. Ramona tells her, Dorinda said if there’s something negative to say, it should be done in private. Why does she do what she doesn’t want done? In the hallway, Sonja says she wants to be herself, and if she wants to be fat, why is Ramona shaming her? I see she latched onto that now. Ramona hunts them down, and says she loves them both. Dorinda starts crying, and says she needed support yesterday, wagging her finger in Ramona’s face. She just left a seven and a half year relationship. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it’s not an easy time; there’s a slight depression. She doesn’t need to be knocked down; she needs a soft place to land. Ramona isn’t a pillow; she’s a concrete block. Dorinda says Ramona is like a sister to her. Ramona takes Dorinda’s hand, and asks her to come back; she loves them both. As they head back in, Dorinda says she knows her delivery sucks. She’s been trying with a life coach. She doesn’t want to be alone again. Ramona says she’s afraid she’s going to be alone forever, and she, Dorinda, and Sonja have a three-way hug. Elyse says the three of them could drive Mother Teresa to drink. In Ramona’s interview, she says she loves Dorinda, but she won’t admit how mean-spirited she is. When Dorinda is like this, nothing will work. There’s nothing you can do. Just shut your mouth.

Next time, a trip to Newport, Sonja says maybe she’ll get her mojo back, Leah goes on another drunken rampage, and Ramona doesn’t like the behavior.

🍤  On Top Chef, Melissa was bummed because Restaurant Wars threw her off, and she’d been on the bottom in the challenges. She was in an emotional rut. Stephanie was also down, having lost her brother to addiction a year and a half ago. In her interview, she said she’d come out stronger, and that’s why she was there – it was her victory song. Padma introduced the guest judge, pastry chef and three time James Beard Award winner Sherry Yard. Padma told the chefs that the Quickfire challenge was going to be a piece of cake. Sherry said baking was all about time, temperature, taste, and methodology. The chefs would get the basic pantry staples – dairy, flour, sugar, and eggs – but the rest of their ingredients would come from a blindfold taste test. They had five minutes to guess twenty ingredients. Whichever ingredients they guessed right, they could use, although they didn’t have to use them all. The chef who guessed the highest number of ingredients would get an hour, the next two would get forty-five minutes, and the last two, a half hour. All Padma would say about the winner is that they’d get a huge advantage in the elimination challenge that would be worth fighting for. Stephanie guessed the most ingredients – fifteen, with twelve seconds to spare. Next, Gregory and Melissa tied with twelve, and at the bottom was the other white Bryan, guessing only seven correctly. The biggest stumbling block seemed to be almond butter, which most of them guessed to be peanut butter. I thought this was kind of odd, since I find almond butter to have a very distinctive taste. After the chefs presented their desserts, the judges loved Karen’s flavor, but thought it was too aggressive; Bryan’s components fought on the plate; but Melissa’s flavors sang, and she was the winner.

Next, Padma said, let the games begin, and introduced the chefs’ helpers and guest judges  Niki and Carole Nakayama, Michelin star chefs and co-owners of two Michelin star restaurants. In honor of the Tokyo Olympics, the chefs would be making food inspired by Japan – a kaiseki meal of six courses, the most formal way of dining in Japan, and similar to a tasting menu. They were told kaiseki is a celebration of nature, about protecting the integrity of the ingredient, and cooking with restraint, which made full of Malarkey quake in his shoes. Given two hours to cook, each chef would make one dish, and they would be cooking for a group of elite Olympic athletes. The Nakayama sisters treated the chefs to a kaiseki meal so they could get the vibe.

Before the dinner began, Padma said both sporting events and food bring people together. She was excited to be doing something joyous and traditionally Japanese. As usual, everything looked incredibly impressive, and sounded phenomenal, except for the piece of shell in Melissa’s crab dish.

Stephanie was the winner, with a balance of flavor and ingredients. She was quite shocked, and would also be going to the Tokyo Olympics. Unfortunately, we all know how that would eventually turn out. She joked that she was probably the least athletic of the group. Karen’s duck dish caused her to be told to pack her knives and go. In her interview, she said she’d been eliminated twice for a good dish, had done things she never thought she would try, learned tenacity, and cooked her ass off. It was on to Last Chance Kitchen for her, as she told us, never say die.

They never did reveal what the huge advantage was the elimination challenge winner would receive. I can’t imagine it was the trip to the Olympics. Next time, the finale goes to Europe, and a possible bail by Brian full of Malarkey.

🏖 Life’s a Beach Again…

It looks like the world is starting to open back up. As I’ve come to say every week, whatever happened to the Shahs reunion? All continues to be quiet on the Sunset front, and I have yet to see a ransom note. Regardless, see you tomorrow with some tea and words of wisdom. Until then, stay safe, stay exercising caution, and stay puffed.

May 14, 2020 – The Custody Hearing Begins, Getting Lost In a Maze, Chefs At Camp & Alive


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

At Charlie’s, Finn tells Anna, the lab rans tests, and it was a rare case of alienitus. They quarantined the patient until last night, when his chest burst open, and out crawled a big slimy alien. Anna says, interesting, and he says, it turned out the alien was friendly, so he gave it a bath, named it E.T., and he’s bringing it home to Violet. Anna says, an alien? He says, let him guess. Her mind is on Holly. She says, you know the word frenemy? It’s cliché, but it pretty accurately describes their relationship. They were rivals and allies. They admired each other, but annoyed each other. Holly could run a con like no one else; even better than her. She had a lighter touch, and Anna was a little jealous. She knew Holly was on the other side of the world, but expected her to turn up there again one day. It’s not going to happen now. Finn says he’s sorry. Sometimes the best response to a sudden loss is a life affirming decision. She asks if he has something in mind, and he says he does.

Sasha lies on her bed, face down, fully clothed. The phone rings, and Maxie asks where she is. Don’t tell her that Sasha forgot about the photoshoot. The entire crew is waiting, and there’s no face of Deception for the cover. Sasha says she’ll be right there, and Maxie says she has five minutes, or she’s finding another model. Lulu comes to see Maxie, along with Charlotte. She asks how it’s going, and Maxie says, Sasha is late, the wardrobe mistress isn’t there, and the coffee is cold. The shoot is going to implode, and take her career with it.

Laura sits at Jax’s table at the MetroCourt, and tells him that she just came from the fundraiser breakfast. She found out he made a generous donation. He says sorry he couldn’t be there in person, but he has a meeting of his own. He’s waiting for Nina, but he’s all ears until she gets there. How did it go? She says, better than expected, thanks to him, and a couple of other generous donations. He says he’s sure her presence has something to do with the success. He’s grateful for her hard work and integrity. She says she’s only as good as the people she represents, and he tells her, don’t be modest. She’s not afraid to tell the truth, and has an amazing ability to inspire others. She says, one can only hope.

Sasha gets in the elevator, and Nina says, tough morning? Sasha says she has no idea, but Nina says, actually, she thinks she does.

Valentin meets Martin at the MetroCourt, and asks if Martin has good news. Martin thinks he’ll be well pleased at the progress. He’s acquired numerous shares from Quartermaines spread far and wide. Valentin says he doesn’t have controlling interest yet, and Martin says, not yet. Valentin says, not yet, but he’s closer than the Quartermaines realize.

Chase asks how he can help Carly, and she tells him that she’s pretty sure he’s aware that Willow and Michael got married. He says she must be very happy, and she says she regrets what the decision cost him.

Diane asks where Michael has been, and he says he was at Turning Woods; his dad was visiting Mike. She asks how Mike is doing, and he says, not great. They want to put in a feeding tube, and his dad is trying to decide. She says she’s sure he was a comfort to Sonny; however, moving forward his priority needs to be Wiley. He needs to be calm, collected, and focused. Taking away a child from its mother is difficult under the best circumstances, even a mother as awful as Nelle. He says, things may have gotten easier, and she asks, how? Willow walks in, and asks Michael how it went at Turning Woods. Michael says, rough; her? She says, the same. Diane says, what a gorgeous ring. One might say spectacular. Michael says it belonged to his great-grandmother, and now it belongs to his wife. He and Willow got married last night.

Finn says he and Anna have talked about it; it’s time to do something about it. She says, do something about what? and he says, the thing where people say I do. They can at least pick a date, and send invitations out. She says, after Violet’s party, he’s in the mood for another, and he says he’s learned to appreciate a good celebration. She tells him, he’s turning into a romantic, and he asks if that’s a good thing. She says, it’s a great thing. She looks at her phone, and says, August maybe. It gives them time to plan, and time to figure out what to wear. He says, August is perfect, and they almost kiss, but Robert interrupts. He says, isn’t this cozy? They’re acting like nothing happened, when they know something did. He tells Anna, stop running around telling people what he can and can’t be told.

Chase tells Carly that he doubts Michael wants to see him, but let Michael know he hopes they give Wiley the life he deserves. She says, that’s the plan. The custody hearing is today. He asks why she’s there instead of in court, and she says, there’s someone she needs to thank.

Nina says Sasha just broke up with Michael, and Sasha says Nina was right about her. She’s not good enough. Nina thinks the person Sasha hurt the most is herself. Sasha tells her, don’t be nice, not today, but Nina says Sasha put in the knife and she doesn’t feel like twisting it. She hopes Sasha finds peace and love, and hopes the pain she’s in is gone forever. Sasha gets out of the elevator, and Nina looks puzzled.

Maxie screams for the wardrobe mistress, and someone hands her hot coffee. Lulu says Maxie will be brilliant. She works best in a crisis. Maxie says she loves Lulu, but her pep talk isn’t working. This was her moment in the spotlight; taking a tired company from the 90s and turning it into a power brand. Does Lulu see a power brand happening? What she sees are Maxie’s dreams and plans disintegrating. Sasha comes in, and Charlotte says she thought Sasha was a model; she looks terrible. Lulu tells her to apologize, but Sasha says, Charlotte is just telling it how she sees it. Maxie asks if Sasha wants to tank Deception before it even launches, and tells the makeup artist to make his magic. Charlotte asks if she can watch, and Lulu asks if it’s okay. Sasha says, it’s time to turn this toad into a swan, and leaves with the makeup artist. Lulu tells Maxie, nothing but a straight road ahead, and Maxie says, until the next curve. She wanted to be boss, and all she can do is think of what Nina would do. Nina walks in, and says, she just asked the person she trusted most – Maxie.

Finn realizes Robert is upset, but tells him, take it down a notch. Anna says, sit down, and asks Finn to get some coffee. Robert says he talked to Mac, who said she had suspicions. Why did Mac have to tell him, and not her? She says, the WSB is still looking for the reason the ship sank, and Robert says, his shelf life has expired, so he can’t be told? She says she has no evidence of foul play. When she finds some, he’ll be the first to know. He asks what she thinks. Has she seen discrepancies in the report that point to murder?

Nina says she saw Sasha, and came to offer moral support. Maxie appreciates it, but it only makes her more nervous. Lulu asks if Nina will do her a favor. Charlotte begged to be taken to the shoot before she meets Valentin, and Lulu is late for an Invader interview. She has a deadline, and asks if Nina would mind taking Charlotte. Nina says she’d be thrilled; she was headed there anyway. She tells Maxie, just for the record, no one knows how to manage a shoot like her. She didn’t leave Crimson to second guess herself. She left to be boss. She finally decided to be a superstar, and she is. Don’t give in. Those who play small aren’t stars, and never will be. Toughen up, get the job done, and be a star.

Jax tells Laura that he’s surprised Valentin didn’t fight harder for the estate. He could have dragged it out in court for years. Laura says, maybe he realized the Cassadine estate is both a blessing and a curse. Jax says, a valuable one, and she says, don’t worry. She’s sure Valentin will find a way to make money.

Valentin asks if Martin had any trouble, and Martin says, nothing they can’t overcome. Ned is preoccupied with Brook, and Michael has the custody battle. Speaking of which, he has to get to court for it. Valentin says, Drew is dead, and Jason has no interest, but what about the children? He asks Martin to look into who’s controlling their shares.

Diane says Willow is a brave woman. She married into both the Quartermaine and Corinthos families. She’s sure Willow is aware that as individuals, they’re all a bit difficult, but as a group, they’re fearless, intelligent, and never boring. And Michael is the best of the lot. Willow says she thinks so. Diane says she doesn’t know why she didn’t think it. Of course (🍷) they’re a perfect match, and not just for a courtroom stunt. She thinks they’ll be happy and better parents for Wiley. Let her know where they’re registered. Willow says she thinks she can speak for Michael. The only gift they need is knowing Wiley is safe from Nelle.

Carly tells Chase, she used to think people who were noble were stupid, that they were suckers. Until someone she loved and respected made a sacrifice for the sake of her child. She didn’t appreciate it at the time, until she realized their sacrifice changed everything. What they did made Michael’s life better. Chase hopes it works out that way for Wiley, and she says, her too. When the judge sees them, they’ll see two people who love Wiley, and would do anything to ensure he grows up in a loving safe home. So if he ever crosses paths with the person who made it happen, let them know she’ll always cherish their selfless actions. He says he will.

Charlotte tells Valentin, they put makeup on Sasha, and she looks beautiful. Valentin says, it sounds like she had fun, and Charlotte says she used to be mad at Sasha, but now she feels bad for her. She doesn’t think Sasha felt good, but she still took pictures. He says it’s good she has compassion. It’s not good to be angry and resentful. Charlotte thanks Nina, and Nina says she’ll see Charlotte again soon. If they ask nice, maybe her papa will let them have a girls night out. Laura and Jax come by, and Laura tells Charlotte, what a surprise, and asks for a hug. Nina tells Jax, sorry she’s late. She needed to make a special delivery. Jax says it’s good to see Laura, and she says him too, and thanks him again for his donation. She leaves, and Jax asks Nina what she wanted to talk to him about. She thanks him for providing the hand holding when she was worried about Nelle. He says, no thanks are required, and she says, but she can’t lean on him forever. It’s time to take control of her own life.

Maxie says everything is under control, and Lulu says Maxie would make an excellent general if she ever choses to join the Army. Sasha asks where she’s wanted, and Maxie says she’ll leave that up to the photographer. Lulu says, while they wait, can she ask come pre-photoshoot questions? Sasha says, like what? and Lulu says, nothing hard core. Her Invader audience would like to know what it’s like to launch a new business. Where does she imagine it’s going, and where does she see herself in five years? Sasha says she hasn’t thought that far ahead. She tries to take it one day at a time. She doesn’t know what tomorrow looks like, let alone five years from now. She starts to cry, and Maxie comes in. She asks what Lulu said to her, and Lulu says she was talking about the future. Maxie says the makeup artist probably left already. Give them a moment alone. She tells Sasha that Lulu shouldn’t have asked; Sasha probably has no idea how Chase fits into her future. Sasha says she and Chase aren’t together. Maxie says, she wants to help take care of Sasha’s personal life, but not today. Today, they’re businesswomen, and their future depends on the Deception launch. She has a crew who cost a fortune sitting around waiting. Sasha needs to pull herself together. She can have a cry afterward, and Maxie will hold her hand. Maxie gave up great career for this, and doesn’t want to regret it.

Carly sees Martin, and asks where his client is. Still sleeping under a rock? Martin doesn’t believe they’ve been formally introduced and introduces himself. She says she would say it’s a pleasure, but she’d be lying. He asks if she doesn’t believe everyone is entitled to a fair hearing and worthy representation. She says she believes in justice for those who deserve it. He says he couldn’t agree more, and she says she’ll have to tell her husband they have something in common. Her husband is Michael’s father. He does know Sonny Corinthos, doesn’t he?

Sasha dabs at her eyes, and flashes back to Michael berating her and Chase. Michael says he just has one question to start. How long has this been going on?

Anna tells Robert, she has no proof either way. Finn comes back, and Robert asks if Anna thinks Holly might still be alive. She says that’s exactly the reason why she didn’t tell him; he jumps to conclusions. If he thinks she’s doubting it, he’ll go chase ghosts like he always does. Robert tells Finn, once before they thought Holly was dead in a plane crash, but she’d been in a car crash. Then she tried to return to Port Charles to recover. Finn asks, for what reason? To face death again? Anna says, a ship went down; Holly isn’t the only one missing, and Robert says, there were discrepancies enough for Anna to discuss it with his brother. Which leads him to believe she’s not sure whether Holly is dead or not. Finn tells Robert not to get his hopes up, and Robert says, take heart. In the meantime, he has a call to make.

A woman comes into the dressing room, and Sasha says, tell Maxie she’ll be ready in a minute. The woman says she didn’t come for Maxie, and gives Sasha a vial of cocaine. She says, something to get through the shoot. Sasha says she doesn’t, and the woman says she doesn’t either, except for really tough days.

Chase sees Lulu, and asks if the photoshoot is over. Lulu says, Maxie gave everyone a break; she’s trying to salvage the day. He asks, what happened? and she says, Sasha was a mess. She overslept, was hungover, and can’t stop crying. He says, sorry, and she says, it’s too late for apologies. She thought he was a decent, but he was just good at hiding what a jerk he is. Maxie and Lucy put everything into this, and won’t just lose their investment, but their reputations. He asks what he can do, and she says, Sasha is in makeup. Tell her whatever he needs to, so they can move on.

Martin says he’s well-aware of Sonny’s history, and how those who displease him disappear. He’s sure Carly has been instructed on how not to make incriminating statements. She says she has no idea what he’s talking about. Her husband is a businessman like any other. He does have powerful connections though, and an ambitious lawyer could find them lucrative. Diane walks in with Michael and Willow. He says, Michael Corinthos and Willow Tate, and Willow says, it’s Corinthos now. Martin says, a sudden marriage before a court date; he’ll have to keep an eye on her. Diane says, who is she to stand in the way of a committed, stable union?

Valentin sees Laura sitting at his table. He asks to what he owes the pleasure, and she says she’s just checking in. How was the drop off? He says, without incident. Charlotte is in school, safe, and he’s going to pick her up to go riding. Laura is sure she’s thrilled, and he says, Lulu agreed to 50/50 custody. He appreciates whatever Laura said to her. She says he can thank his daughter. She ran away when she thought she’d be separated from him. He says he intended on letting her go for her own good, but he realized to Charlotte, it looked like abandonment, and he was afraid it would have the opposite effect. He was abandoned, and look what happened to him. He doesn’t want that for Charlotte. Laura says she doesn’t either. She persuaded Lulu to compromise for Charlotte’s sake. Don’t make her regret it.

Lulu tells Maxie that she sent Chase to talk to Sasha. Maxie asks if she thinks that will work, and Lulu says she thought anything he would say was an improvement on what they had to offer. It can’t get worse. Maxie says, Sasha is still in love with Michael. She blew up her life, and if she and Chase have a mutual meltdown, this is over.

Chase asks if it’s a bad day, and Sasha asks what he’s doing there. He says Carly came by to say how grateful she was for what they did. She asks if Carly admitted she knew, and he says, not in so many words. As hard as it’s been, Carly appreciates what she called their sacrifice. Sasha admits, she didn’t think it would be this hard, and he says, he didn’t either.

Nina tells Jax, she ran into Sasha. She’s not having a good morning, and Nina felt the need to comfort her. He says it doesn’t surprise him. Did she? She says she tried. She guesses Sasha is good. She dropped in on Deception, and Maxie was drowning in self-doubt, and she had the impulse to build Maxie’s confidence, and Charlotte still needs her. He says she’s like a second mother. She says, her point being, she told him that she didn’t want to go down that rabbit hole and look for her daughter. Denying her feelings didn’t help. He says, it’s not something you get over, and asks if she wants him to help find her child. She says, absolutely not.

In the courtroom, Diane asks what Carly said to Martin, and Carly says she was reminding him of who Michael’s father was. Diane says Carly can’t intimidate him. He’s going to do his level best to goad her, and show the judge how much she despises Nelle. He’s going to paint her as a domineering and controlling woman, who wants to wrest a son from his loving mother. Don’t let him. Martin comes in, and Diane says, underneath that southern charm is a shark ready for blood. Don’t forget. The judge arrives, and the bailiff says, the Honorable Judge Lowe is presiding, Willow asks Michael, where is Nelle? Everyone waits.

Finn says he’s never seen Robert so upset, and Anna says, he and Holly had a unique relationship. They’d fight and make up; she’d leave, and he’d go after her. He’s never stopped loving her. Finn says, that’s why Robert needs her to be alive, and she says she’s afraid he’ll lose himself in this desperate quest to find her. He asks if she thinks there’s a chance, but she says she doesn’t know. There’s always a question. Until her body is discovered, Holly isn’t gone.

Chase tells Sasha, when Michael is granted full custody, everything they did will be worth it. She says she’s been telling herself that, and he says, the truth is, Michael and Willow might never know the part they played, but they did a good thing. She says, he’s coping better than she is, and he asks if she’s kidding him. He could barely get out of bed. The Chief of Detectives called, looking for him. All he can thinks about is Willow’s smile and the sound of her voice. Sasha knows how he feels. She can’t get out of her own head, and now she’s going to relinquish her dream. He tells her, make the dream start happening today. She says, tell Maxie tell she’ll be right out. He leaves and she looks at herself in the mirror.

Laura says, it’s been proven Valentin isn’t a Cassadine, and he asks, what’s her point? She asks if Nikolas and Spencer are free of retribution. He says he’s not a fan of Nikolas, but he has no plans for that. They’re both safe. She says he’s been given a second chance. It’s rare, and right now he can decide who he wants to be. He says he won’t argue with that, and she says she hopes he uses it wisely, and becomes the man he was meant to be. He thanks her, and asks who that is exactly. She says, a man who puts his family first, before money and power. He asks if she thinks he could be that man, and she says, the question is, does he want to be?

Maxie tells Chase, Sasha needs to be at 100%; make that 200%. Is she okay? He says he thinks so, and she says, that doesn’t sound like 300%. He says he explained what matters, and she says it’s hard to believe he’s the same guy she thought he was; Lulu was right. Sasha comes out, and says, it’s time to make their dream come true with the face that launched a million sales for Deception. Maxie tells Chase, get out, and tells Sasha that she looks gorgeous. We see the makeup table, and the vial is empty. Brilliant of her to just leave it sitting there.

Nina tells Jax, she appreciates the offer, but she doesn’t need him or anyone else undertaking a journey that should be hers. If her daughter is out there, she’ll sure as hell find her herself.

On the phone in the hallway, Martin tells Nelle that he can’t stall any longer. Get here now. He goes back in, and thanks the judge, assuring him Nelle will be there soon, and sends her deepest apologies. Diane tells Michael and Willow not to get ahead of themselves. Michael asks what the best case is if Nelle doesn’t show, and she says, the judge already has the arguments. He could decide to rule in Michael’s favor if Nelle doesn’t show soon. Judge Lowe asks if Martin’s client is in the courthouse, and Martin says he’s sure she is. The judge says he has a busy calendar, and they’ve waited long enough.

Nelle dashes into the courtroom, wearing a wedding dress, and carrying a bouquet. She says she’s sorry she’s late. The most incredible thing happened. She shows everyone her ring.

On Monday, TJ tells Molly that they have to work on their life, Nelle introduces her new husband, Cyrus meets Ava, and Jordan tells Sonny to stay out of her investigation.

The Real Housewives of New York

Leah meets Dorinda, Sonja, and LuAnn, at a bench in the park. Elsewhere in the park, Sonja and Ramona meet for a walk. Tinsley goes to boxing training with instructor Mike. He asks how Tinsley is, and she says, good, but not great. He says, that’s better than last time, and we flash back to Tinsley weeping and overwhelmed, saying she wants to live her best life. She  tells him that she’s in a better place, and she’s single now. In her interview, she says, Mike isn’t easy to talk to. He forces her to fight with her fists and her words. She tells him there’s tension with Dorinda over nothing. Dorinda is saying Tinsley isn’t being open. Mike asks, where do they get these names from? In Tinsley’s interview, she says she doesn’t know where to go with Dorinda. She wants it to be pleasant, but Dorinda likes to fight. Mike asks if they had a fight, and what happened.

Dorinda tells LuAnn and Leah that she’s done with Tinsley. Tinsley is like a mint in her mouth; gone. In Leah’s interview, she says for someone Dorinda isn’t interested in, she spends a lot of time talking about Tinsley.

Tinsley tells Mike, they all jump in, and she can’t say anything. He tells her, he’s Dorito, and they’re going to box. Ha-ha! Loving Mike. He punches at Tinsley, and she cringes. He tells her, take it like a doormat. He asks why she’s unhappy, and she says she’s not. He wonders if that’s why she was crying the last time she was there, and she says she’s confused. She tells Mike, she’s done.

LuAnn tells Dorinda that Tinsley has an overbearing mother from the South, and she needs to be accepted for who she is.

Ramona tells Sonja, Dorinda is hard on Tinsley. She thinks something is going on with Dorinda, and Sonja suggests she’s jealous. In Sonja’s interview, she says, Tinsley is taken care of, and Rich took care of Dorinda. She misses that life. Ramona says, they’re all devoid of partners now, and Dorinda misses the past. Sonja says, when John tries to help Dorinda, she tells him she’s got this. It’s a different relationship, and her time with Richard was cut short. In Ramona’s interview, she says comparing Richard and John is like comparing apples and oranges. Richard graduated from Harvard, and she doesn’t know if John even graduated from anywhere.

Mike tells Tinsley that she has a down face. What’s the antidote? WTF does she want to do? Tinsley says she doesn’t know, but he says she’s known all along. She’s a legend. There will never be another Tinsdale. She says there isn’t one to begin with. Her name is Tinsley. I don’t think she gets his humor. She certainly doesn’t get that you have to hit back in boxing.

LuAnn visits Leah’s apartment. In Leah’s interview, she says she and LuAnn have shared similar obstacles, and are kindred spirits. LuAnn says she brought her food. She’s starving and thought Leah might be hungry. In LuAnn’s interview, a producer asks what she thinks of Leah’s apartment, and LuAnn asks if they really want to know, and laughs. She tells Leah, it’s really cool. Leah shows LuAnn around, and says, since Kier is only there half the time, she took all the closets. In her interview, LuAnn adds that she loves how humble Leah is. In Leah’s interview, she says, most people are impressed, unless they’re in the 1%. She’s not, and there’s no shame in that. It’s not about the size, it’s about the vibe. She says she heard LuAnn drank at the comedy show, and LuAnn says she thought it was water, and she was thirsty, but it was vodka. She took two sips or three, and went on stage. She was okay, but she never had a big problem. Except for falling into a bush on a crazy girls trip. We flash back to the gift that keeps on giving. LuAnn says she feels if she wants a drink at this point, she can. Leah says that’s how she feels too. For years, she didn’t drink because she’d been told it was death in a bottle, but she doesn’t believe it. She’s been in hell when she wasn’t drinking, with being over-medicated and in toxic relationships. In Leah’s interview, she says, you’re told you have no control, and it’s not empowering; it’s bullsh*t. It’s just a drink. What’s it going to do? We flash back to a naked Leah flinging tiki torches around, and yelling at Sonja. Leah tells LuAnn, she was in a different place when she stopped, and she’s done a lot of work on herself. LuAnn says she has to give herself a break. She’s been listening to herself, and it feels nice to give herself permission to say what she wants. She has a sense of control. In her interview, LuAnn says she lives moment by moment, and in that moment, she wanted vodka. It’s not a big deal. She’s taken off the life jacket, and she’s getting in the pool with the ladies. I used to work for Al-Anon, and I keep thinking of their pamphlet, A Merry-go-round Named Denial. LuAnn asks if Leah saw the Page Six article about Dorinda.

Sonja sees Dorinda on a bench in the park, and asks about the article. Dorinda brings it up on her phone, and it says she’s taking a break from long time boyfriend John. Dorinda wonders if Ramona planted it. In her interview, Dorinda says break-ups are terrible, but she had to do what was best for herself. Her expectation levels have grown, and she needs to find the right partner whose willing to be engaged that way. She tells Sonja there was no fight, but John feels bad because they love each other. She just feels like she’s grown so fast.

The article makes the rounds. LuAnn tells Leah, Dorinda needed John; he was there to pick up the pieces, and helped her at a bad time. She has nothing against him, but Dorinda feels like she’s outgrown him. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, it’s weird to find out about it on Page Six. In Leah’s interview, she says she knows more about Richard than she does about John. What does that say? In Sonya’s interview, she says, now Dorinda is single like the rest of them. In Ramona’s interview, she says she knew before Dorinda did. She’s not surprised. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, them finding out on Page Six, after Dorinda made such a big deal about sharing things makes her a hypocrite. Sonja tells Dorinda that they need to take care of themselves. Dorinda says she needs a house cat rather than one where, when the door opens, he dashes out. LuAnn thinks they need to do something to take Dorinda’s mind off of the breakup. She knows an apple picking place. In her interview, LuAnn says they need to take full advantage of the breakup, and forget the city for a day. She tells Leah that she needs a bigger coffee table.

The women get in a luxury van, and Ramona she’s excited for the trip. LuAnn says, it’s an orchard. They’re going to have lunch by the pumpkin patch, and there’s a corn maze, pumpkin picking, a hayride, and they’ll have a winery tasting later. There’s also a store that sells pies and apple cider donuts. It’s a perfect day for it. Ramona says, it’s gorgeous. In Sonya’s interview, she says she’s excited to be with the girls. She’s not excited to drink more wine though. She just wants to have a healthy day.

The van arrives at Weed Orchards and Winery. Tinsley says, it’s never too early for wine. It’s called breakfast wine, and it’s normal. Funny. I’ve never heard of it. Dorinda gets excited about the petting zoo. Ramona says only Tinsley would wear heels to an orchard. Dorinda brings out a glass that’s almost as big as she is, and says they’re just going to have one glass. In her interview, Sonja says she wasn’t of the mindset to drink, but she’s with her girls, so hell to the no. She’s not missing out. They have lunch, and Ramona toasts to good girlfriends. I’m guessing those girlfriends must be on some other show. Sonja takes pictures, and Ramona asks Dorinda what’s going on with John. Dorinda says she’s not the person that John met; she’s changed. Ramona says Dorinda was broken when they met. Dorinda says it’s been a good process. It made her reevaluate things. In her interview, she says, going through the process with the house flooding, and making the decision about John, she was able to mourn Richard for the first time. Hannah is out of the house, and she’s decided to be alone for the first time, and she’s okay with it. She tells the women, it’s not easy to open herself up to criticism, and Tinsley mumbles, it’s called sharing. In her interview, she calls bullsh*t. Tinsley tells Dorinda that saying she might get judged makes her a hypocrite, and Dorinda tells Tinsley, don’t comment. She has gum that’s lasted longer than Tinsley’s relationships. She calls Tinsley invisible, and in Ramona’s interview, she says, Dorinda has outbursts of anger, but her anger at Tinsley is the worst. Elyse wants them to say something nice about each other. In her interview, Ramona thinks Dorinda is using Tinsley as a punching bag to be so vicious, but she’s glad, since she doesn’t want it to happen to her. Nice. Dorinda makes fun of Tinsley crying, and Tinsley says Dorinda sounds like a bully and mean. In Leah’s interview, she says, if this is Dorinda when she’s not interested in Tinsley, what does Dorinda being interested in Tinsley look like? She tells Dorinda, they should be holding each other up, not bringing each other down, but Dorinda says she can’t deal with dumbness. I guess she can’t deal with a dictionary either, since I assume she means stupidity and not being mute. Tinsley says Dorinda is a bully, and Dorinda says, don’t be judging her. Tinsley says she doesn’t judge Dorinda, and Ramona tells Tinsley, calm down. Tinsley, who has moved into screeching, says, let her finish. Dorinda sarcastically says she’s scared, and asks LuAnn to protect her. Sonja asks why Tinsley is getting in on the conversation, because she’s probably too drunk already to understand what’s going on outside of the world in her head. Tinsley says, for someone who doesn’t care about her, Dorinda says a lot of sh*t about her. She doesn’t like being ganged up on. She leaves the table, and LuAnn follows. She tells Tinsley not to cry. She’s been there, and don’t let them see you cry. Tinsley says she can’t say anything without Dorinda saying something.

Elyse thinks Dorinda is grieving, and Dorinda tells Elyse to stop analyzing her. She’s not mean or unkind. Um… In Elyse’s interview, she says she’s not analyzing Dorinda; she’s frightened of Dorinda. You don’t have to be a psychologist to see she’s mean. Tinsley tells LuAnn that she’s suffered, and if she’s yelling, it’s because she’s upset. LuAnn says Dorinda has a lot of anger toward Tinsley, but she doesn’t know why. Dorinda tells Leah that Tinsley should just be compassionate, and talk to her some other time. She knew she was triggering Dorinda, saying she was being a bitch. If Tinsley wants a bitch, she’s got one. In Leah’s interview, she says, the group, especially Dorinda, is hard on Tinsley for not being forthcoming, but she can understand why Tinsley would mutter under her breath. Leah says they all have kids, which is something Tinsley wants. Dorinda says she buried a husband – like we don’t already know – and she wanted to die. Leah says she got a family, and was loved. Dorinda says, it was a terrible day, and starts to cry. Leah sits next to her, and says she and Tinsley have nothing in common; she gets it. Dorinda wails that she came to the realization that she’s 55, and this is not what she planned. Honey, I’ve got news for you, most of our lives aren’t what we planned. She says she did everything right. She’s a good mother, and not dishonest, and this is what she gets. In her interview, Leah says she has the utmost sympathy, but what does that have to do with Tinsley? Dorinda says she almost became an alcoholic (almost became?), and realized she didn’t like who she saw in the mirror. Leah says she likes Dorinda because she’s real. LuAnn says they’re going on a hayride if it kills them.

Tinsley talks to herself as she changes into sneakers, and says every time she tries, she’s squashed, and has to sit in the corner. Dorinda says, it’s the best time she’s ever had, and talks to the goats. Now I’m confused. Tinsley tells Leah that she wants to climb a tree. She wonders if they’re allowed, and Leah says, who cares? No one will know. Tinsley asks if climbing trees solves problems, and Leah says, it does. In her interview, Leah says, she’d rather be smoking trees, but the Weed Orchard is apparently just an orchard. Tinsley climbs up, and says she can see the world. In her interview, she says she’s mad at herself for letting Dorinda get to her, and getting breaking down crying mad. She let Dorinda rile her up. LuAnn comes along, and says they need to find the girls for the hayride.

They sit in the wagon, and after they get going, Sonja demands to go faster. LuAnn says this was just a way to get them off the lunch table; they’re going to a corn maze. Dorinda says she doesn’t need a maze. In Ramona’s interview, she says, who needs to get more lost? When they get there, Sonja confuses eggplants for pot plants. She tries chatting up the owner, but he’s not having it. Elyse, Ramona, and Dorinda head into the maze, and a woman who works there says they’re going the wrong way. LuAnn asks, which way is the right one? and goes in with Tinsley, Sonja, and Leah. Sonja shucks some corn, and puts it in her bag, saying she’s friends with the owner. LuAnn say she doesn’t know where the hell she’s going, and Sonja wonders what the goal is. She says, if they follow LuAnn, they’ll never get out. Sonja squats to pee, and Leah says she’s fertilizing the soil. LuAnn suggests holding it, but Leah says it’s not good for your bladder. LuAnn doesn’t know how good corn shucks are for it either. In her interview, Lean says, there are two Sonja’s. Miss Morgan, who lives on the Upper East Side, hates tattoos, and comes from old money; and turnip Sonja, who she loves. She has the feeling if both Sonjas met, they wouldn’t like each other. Dorinda says, just lose Tinsley. She’d be good as a corn stalk. My God, that woman is obsessed. In Dorinda’s interview, she says the maze is fun, but they can get out any time now. It’s time to get back to the maze of drinks. She and her group find a gazebo, and Dorinda says they’ll wait until they’re rescued.

On the way back, Sonja asks the owner how much money he makes. Dorinda thanks Ramona for listening, and Ramona say Dorinda is in pain. So was Mario. The reason he cheated was because he felt inadequate. In Ramona’s interview, she says, Dorinda needs to focus on herself, not the reason her relationship with John is over. It’s okay to move on. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, endings are painful, but sometimes breakups are good, healthy, and needed. It’s easy to fall back into old habits, and then what? She tells Ramona that John will always have a seat at her dinner table. She never wants someone to say their life was less than because of her (except Tinsley?). She wants them to say their life was better for having met her. Ramona says they blessed each other’s lives, and in her interview, says, it’s something Dorinda needs to work out. She’s suffering.

Back at the main house, the women have some fruit, cheese, and wine. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, when Sonja drinks, she loses it, and becomes a caricature of herself. Ramona says Sonja is needy, and asks when was the last time she had sex? Sonja says she got pounded last night. They discuss d*ck pics, and in LuAnn’s interview, she says she doesn’t like to shop online. She likes to touch and feel things, so d*ck pics don’t do it for her. Tinsley asks why it has to just be about that; what about loving each other? Sonja says Tinsley would do anything for d*ck if it brings her a bracelet. Why Tinsley doesn’t haul off and smack Sonja is beyond me. Elyse says when she’s not in a relationship, she misses being held, and Sonja says they all want sex. LuAnn says, it’s time to go.

Next time, the women take an exercise class and do some Russian banya (it’s like a sauna plus), Ramona says Dorinda has a pattern, and Dorinda gets nasty with Ramona.

👨🏾‍🍳 On Top Chef, everyone was bummed about Kevin leaving, and we flashed back on his moments. The chefs were taken to a summer camp, in the mountains outside of L.A., where Padma welcomed them, and introduced guest judge Kelsey Barnard Clark, who was the Top Chef Kentucky winner. Padma said that being out in nature made her excited for grilling season to begin. In honor of summer, the Quickfire challenge was to make a dish featuring Bush beans, choosing from a variety of options. Kelsey told them, get creative, have fun, and make a delicious meal. The winner would get $10K, courtesy of Bush beans. The chefs had thirty minutes. Lee Anne came out the winner for how she incorporated the beans in her dish, and her chef skills.

Padma told the chefs, they were not alone. A mom’s group was there for a weekend away from their kids, and to act like kids, and they were to send them off with full bellies and an unforgettable experience. The chefs were to work together to create a Sunday brunch buffet for 200 mothers. Another previous winner, Brook Williamson, would also be a guest judge. Kelsey wanted an impressive buffet, and Padma said each of them had to make two dishes. They had four hours to prep and cook for a 9 am meal, using whatever ingredients the camp had. Beforehand, they got to have some downtime with camp activities, like zip lining and bungie jumping.

For the 9 o’clock brunch, the chefs had to get up at 4 am. Lee Anne said she couldn’t sleep, hearing the karaoke going on below. They were a little disappointed in the lack of diversity in the camp pantry. Karen said there wasn’t much diversity and not a lot of ingredients. Melissa said it was straight up Hunger Games.

Bryan, Geoffrey, and Karen had the best dishes, and Karen came out the winner. The least favorite dishes came from Lee Anne, Melissa, and Brian full of Malarkey. Tom said they were at the place in the competition where mental mistakes start to happen. Lee Anne had to pack her knives and go, but she said it wasn’t over, since shed crushed it before in Last Chance Kitchen. That $10K probably wasn’t a bad consolation prize either. In her interview, she said she was moving into the next phase of her career, and life. After being a mom for five years, she was dusting off the cobwebs.

Next time, the chefs cook for Olympic athletes, and (gasp!) a piece of shell is found in the crab.

😵 Sleepwalking…

I’m way tired, since my sick child dog is back from the hospital, and needs a lot of care right now, so I’m saving the tea for tomorrow. The Shahs reunion remains a mystery, and I’m starting to wonder if they ever really existed. So for now, stay safe, stay keeping it real, and stay gold, Ponyboy. Stay gold.

April 30, 2020 – Carly Figures It Out, NYC Wives Do Fashion Week, the Restaurants Are Chosen, Camp Please No & Wild


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

In keeping with this week’s tradition, I missed the beginning, which wasn’t much. Sonny wants to talk to the family, Julian told Brook to get out of his bar, and Nelle harassed Michael in the park.

Michael tells Nelle, they’re done here, but she says, they’re just getting started.

Sasha sees Carly headed toward her, and says, before she says anything… Carly says she already talked to Michael, and being Michael, he blames himself. But she blames Sasha. She wants Sasha to tell her, in her own words, why she cheated on Michael.

Josslyn asks Sonny if it’s about Mike, but he says his dad is the same. It’s about the situation keeping them there. They can leave the house now. Josslyn asks if they can go back to school, and he says they can. Dev says, it’s amazing news, and Sonny tells Brando that he’s free to go back to Chicago.

At the hospital, Elizabeth asks how Trina is, and Trina says, pretty good, considering. Elizabeth says if there’s anything she can do, just call. Trina thanks her, and Elizabeth tells Cameron that she’s going back to work. Call if he needs her. Cameron flashes back to being on Sonny’s terrace with Trina, and kissing her. Trina says, hey.

At the reception desk, Elizabeth asks if Portia saw Trina, and Portia says Trina was doing her homework there earlier. Elizabeth wishes Cameron was as good with that, and Portia says she’d love to ask Elizabeth’s opinion. It’s about the hospital, so if Elizabeth isn’t comfortable, she’ll understand. Elizabeth says, try her, and Portia says she’s thinking about putting her name in for the head of internal medicine. She knows she’s new, but since Elizabeth has been there a while, she wants her opinion. Would she be stepping on any toes, or inviting pushback or resentment, or both?

Julian tells Brook, turn around, and stay out of his bar. She asks, why the hostility? and he says, maybe because she blackmailed him. She asks if he’s admitting he knew all along the baby was Michael’s.

Michael tells Nelle, his relationship with Sasha – she says, or lack thereof – has nothing to do with her. She says, it doesn’t reflect well on his commitment, or his ability to provide a stable home. She’s willing to compromise though. Instead of being at each other’s throats with a custody hearing, she’s willing to strike a deal. She gets full custody. Of course (🍷) he’ll have visitation. She’s thinking one weekend a month and alternate holidays. In return, grandmas one and two can keep their robust bank accounts and their jobs.

Chase tells Willow, he’s sorry. She says she’s sorry too, for her part in making this happen, but it’s too painful; she can’t go there yet. Someday, her time with him will be happy memories, but this is how life is right now, and she can’t imagine that day. She has no more room in her heart to hurt, and the best way for him to apologize, is to just not. She goes into the bedroom.

Sasha says she knows Carly is furious, but she thinks what happened should stay between her and Michael. Carly says, it’s not just them; there’s Chase. She believed Sasha when Sasha said she loved Michael and would never hurt him like Nelle did. She believed Sasha’s lies and deceit were behind her. Help her understand what changed. Sasha says, it’s not all that complicated, but Carly doubts that. Sasha says, Chase was feeling like things with Willow were happening too fast, and she felt that way too, in a way. She didn’t count on an insta-family with Michael and Wiley. She realized she’d never be enough. Michael needs someone better, more pure. Diane confirmed that she’s a bad choice as far as the custody suit goes. She and Chase were frustrated, and one thing led to another… Carly says, no. She’s lying.

Cameron asks Trina if the Spanish test wasn’t difficult, and she says, no. He asks if she didn’t take the test, but she says, no; she can’t do this. They barely see each other outside of school, and all he can come up with to talk about is that he thought the Spanish test was hard? He’s totally been avoiding her. He says he hasn’t. He’s been busy with school and soccer. She says, like every day of his life. The only thing that’s changed is that they kissed. She suggests they talk about it, and says it can never happen again.

Josslyn says Cameron was going to the hospital after school, and Trina goes there to do her homework sometimes, so she’s probably there. Dev asks if they should text first, but she wants it to be a surprise. Sonny says, they still can’t take public transportation, and one of the bodyguards will drive them. Josslyn and Dev leave, and Brando says Sonny made their day. Sonny says, they seem happy. What about him? Brando says, it’s a great relief that no one is in danger, especially the kids. Sonny appreciates what Brando has done for him and his family. If he needs help reestablishing himself, all he has to do is ask. Brando thanks him, but he was wondering if he has the option to stay.

Brook says Julian is so busted. He was so busy covering his tracks with Brad, he didn’t count on his own son being in the car. He put Lucas in a coma. Julian says he did nothing of the sort. Her theory is pure delusion. She asks if that’s all he’s got. He’s been hiding Michael’s son from him, and Willow has been jumping through fiery hoops for a baby that’s not her own. Did he think Lucas would be grateful? The cherry on top is the accident. Julian tried to kill Brad, but ended up hurting Lucas. He’s in so deep, but not to worry. One word from her to Sonny or Michael, and all his problems will be solved permanently.

Nelle bets Michael didn’t think she had it in her to be fair. He says she wants him to stop fighting for Wiley’s custody, and if he does, she’ll drop the bogus charges against Monica and Bobbie. She says correct, although she has an issue with the bogus part. He says, it’s not going to happen. There’s nothing she can prove, and even if she could, and shuttered the doors of GH, it wouldn’t matter. Monica and Bobbie would happily walk away from their careers rather than let her raise Wiley. She’s bad for Wiley, and he doesn’t trust her with his son. She says, their son, and he says, not when he’s done. She says he thinks he’s better than her, and he says he has to be. Wiley deserves better, and he’s going to have it. She says he’ll be sorry, and the worst part is, it didn’t need to be this way.

Sasha gets why Carly would think she’s lying, and Carly says, none of this tracks. Sasha told her that she thought Michael marrying Willow would improve his chances for custody, and now she says she and Chase have been having an affair the whole time? Sasha says she felt guilty about it, and Carly says, she didn’t sleep with Chase. She just wants Michael to think she did.

Willow tells Chase, she’s sure she forgot some things. If he finds them, just put them aside. He asks if she’s sure she’s okay, and I yell, tell her, you idiot, as Willow leaves. She cries in the hallway, and Chase leans against the door.

Sonny says he had no idea Brando wanted to stay. Brando realizes it seems like he’s doing a 180, and guesses he is. In the beginning, he just wanted out, and to go back to Chicago and his life, but that wasn’t an option. He needed to stay put and play the part of Dev’s dad. He likes Port Charles. Sonny says, it’s a great city, and Brando says, he likes running his own garage. He’s not demanding it be rent free, and if the deal is over, no harm, no foul. But if he can stay and pay rent, keep the garage going, it’s something he’d like to explore.

Elizabeth tells Portia, she’s not comfortable speaking for the doctors, but she’ll speak for the nurses. Even though Portia has only been there a short period, she’s totally earned their respect. Everyone is raving about her. Portia is glad to hear that, and Elizabeth says Portia knows what she’s doing. She’s sure other people will be vying for the position, but she hasn’t heard of any yet. Her vote is, go for it.

Trina tells Cameron, they’re going to get it all out there. She really likes him so much; he’s an awesome friend. She’s so grateful he was with her in the car and at the warehouse. She would have lost her mind without him. He says he would have too. She says she’s researched PTSD, and it messes with you emotions. That’s what happened to them. They almost died, and they went through it together. They’re scrambled, but fine. It’s not fine to make something of it that it’s not. Nothing has changed. He says, it hasn’t? and she says he’s as into Josslyn as he ever was. Josslyn is still getting over Oscar, but she’s close to getting to the other side. It’s only a matter of time before she realizes she’s into him. The worst Cameron can do is convince himself that he’s into Trina when he’s not, and blow his chances. Cameron says, so they’re good? and she says, totally good. He says, wow. She’s the best. She says, duh.

Brook tells Julian, he can relax. She has no interest sharing his secret with Sonny or anyone. The last thing she wants to do is blow up Lucas’s life more than it is already. Julian’s dirty little secret is safe. Dustin comes up behind her, and asks what secret that would be?

Chase sits in the dark, and looks at his phone. He remembers telling Willow that he has to shower, and her saying she’ll risk it, and kissing him.

Carly says, Michael couldn’t bring himself to marry Willow; he didn’t want to hurt Sasha. So she found a way to let him off the hook. She tells Sasha not to confirm it, or she’ll be obligated to tell Michael that she sacrificed her own happiness for him and Wiley. She’s have to tell him that Sasha knows Wiley is the most important thing, and has to be kept away from Nelle. She would probably do the same thing in Sasha’s position, and admires a woman who can do that. Sasha says nothing, and leaves.

Michael says he can’t believe it. Dammit! He picks up a big stick, and hits a tree with it. Willow yells his name, and asks, what’s wrong? What’s going on? He says he ran into Nelle, and gave her exactly what she wanted.

Sonny tells Brando, it’s up to him. Sonny was under the impression Brando couldn’t wait to get out, but if that’s not the case, he can stay. Brando says, cool. He didn’t know if it would mess things up. Sonny says, it works out for him. It’s more convincing for Dev, having Brando around. He doesn’t want Brando to feel obligated now that the danger has passed. Brando says he appreciates being given a choice.

Cameron tells Trina, she’s 100% correct. Trina says, tell her something she doesn’t know, and he says, except for him being into Josslyn. She says, that’s why they were going to the winter formal in the first place; so he could dance with Josslyn. He says he likes her, but it’s not a big deal. If she never feels same way, they’ll just be friends. Trina says, shut up, and he says he wants to tell her how great she is. Hug time. He grabs Trina, and she says she can’t breathe. Josslyn arrives with Dev, and asks, who’s ready for a movie? Did they interrupt something?

Brooks says, Dusty! He made it just in time. He says, what’s the dirty little secret? and Julian says, Brook is exaggerating. Brook says, there’s no use hiding it. She needs to tell Dustin the truth. She and Julian aren’t related, but they have a lot of people in common. Like Lucas. She didn’t know Julian was his biological father until after Julian propositioned her. He thought she was a hooker. Julian says offered to pay for her time; nothing else. Brook says, if she mentioned it to Lucas, it would make things awkward. Out of the goodness of her heart, she hasn’t, but it wouldn’t hurt if Julian was nicer to her.

Chase flashes back to telling Willow that wine guy is a legend, and saying, she’s not going to leave him for wine guy, is she? She says, that depends on if he’s still making her rock climb. He says, it’s at the Y; he’s not asking her to climb Everest. She says, it’s kind of the same thing. In the present, there’s a knock at the door, and Chase jumps up to answer, but it’s Sasha. She asks if she can come in, and he says, sure. She says she wanted to check on him. How’s he doing? Is he waiting for Willow to come back? He says, she’s definitely not coming back.

Michael tells Willow, Nelle agreed to drop the lawsuit… Willow says, in exchange for full custody. Bobbie and Monica would give up their careers and go bankrupt before letting that happen. He says that’s what he told Nelle. She said a bunch of BS, and he lost it. He knows not to do that. What if Nelle was recording it? She drives him crazy. He tells himself, don’t engage, but he couldn’t help it. She made him so furious. Willow says, good for him.

Dustin thinks he and Brook will have the song done in time for the Nurses Ball. She says he didn’t apologize for being late. He says, it was five minutes, and she says she was early. He says he couldn’t let his students out before the bell rang, and she says she can’t get over the fact her artistic Dusty is a high school teacher. He says her artistic Dusty has bills to pay. Not everyone gets to be a Quartermaine. She says, touché, and he says, besides, he’s passionate about teaching, like she is about her music. She suggests they get back to it.

Brando says he understood the situation, and was fine with helping Dev out; he’s a good kid. And he’s not the type to turn his back on someone in trouble. Sonny says, he made that clear, and Brando says, he didn’t like being told how live, and not having a say. He screwed up in the past, but he’s taken control of his life, and has been responsible for his own choices. Having said that, Sonny gave him the opportunity to do something good in Port Charles, and he doesn’t want to waste it.

Trina tells Josslyn, she was telling Cameron that he’s a complete idiot who made a complete mess of his life, but he’s lucky he has smart friends. Josslyn asks what Cameron did now, and Cameron says he was late to practice. The coach was mad, and he’s the one who has to write Cameron a recommendation letter. Trina says she told Cameron it would be okay; he could make it up. She asks how Josslyn and Dev are there, and Dev says, house arrest is officially lifted. Josslyn says they still have to be careful. Sonny’s guys are driving them, but they’re free. Cameron says, good. They can hang out somewhere other than Josslyn’s house. Josslyn says she’s dying to go to the movies, and Trina asks what she wants to see. Josslyn doesn’t care, and Cameron says, not a chick flick. Dev wonders what that is, and Trina says they’re romantic comedies that Cameron secretly loves. Josslyn says, he does, and he knows it.

Nelle goes to the MetroCourt, and Carly asks if there’s something she can do for her. Nelle says she ran into Michael, and Carly says, how was that? Nelle says, terrible. He was abusive and threatening, and she fully intends to tell her lawyer. She was willing to compromise, but Michael refused. As much as she was hoping to avoid all out warfare and being combative, the court is going to hear all about it.

Chase gives Sasha a glass of water. She asks if he’s waiting for Willow, and he says he’s waiting for the sense that he did the right thing. To sense the rightness that will make losing Willow bearable. That should be the reward for doing the far better thing; the pain and loss should get less. He keeps telling himself that, but right now all he can think about is the future he’d started to dream of that will never come true.

Willow says, it’s not like Michael had a meltdown in court, but be real. Nelle is an evil psycho, and it doesn’t matter if he freaks out. If he plays along, she’s hateful, but if he fights her, she’s still hateful. She’s glad he yelled at Nelle, and wishes she’d been there. She would have yelled too, for everything Nelle has done to Michael, Wiley, and her. If not for Nelle and her walking horror show, Willow wouldn’t have flipped out; she wouldn’t have driven Chase into Sasha’s arms. She wouldn’t have had to get her clothes from an apartment where she was the happiest she’s ever been. She hates that she’s doing this now. It doesn’t matter what happened to her, or how sad she is, or how she wishes things were different. The only thing that matters is Wiley. Michael says, she’s right. Nelle is the worst. He suggests she give the tree a whack. She says she’s not hitting a tree, but he says he did, and it made him feel better. Give it a try. She takes the stick, and says, okay. She hits it and laughs. He says, imagine it’s Nelle; give it a good whack. She hits it harder, and keeps hitting it. She says, I hate you Nelle.

Sonny tells Brando, he’s welcome to stay. He’s family, and it’s good to have him. Plus, Sonny owes him. Brando says, he doesn’t, but Sonny says he saved Carly, and stepped up for Dev. He knows Brando didn’t think he had a choice, and responsibility and free will are important to him. Brando says, it was a unique situation, and Sonny says, now that it’s over, Brando’s life is back in his hands. What he does about it, whatever he decides, Sonny will respect it. Brando thanks him, and says he’s not sure he was truly grateful before, but he is now. They shake hands.

Portia tells Elizabeth, she pulled the trigger. She’s officially in the running for head of internal medicine. Elizabeth says, good for her, and good luck. Portia appreciates it, and thinks Elizabeth for her support.

Taking Trina aside, Josslyn says, Cameron seems happy, and Trina says, he does. Josslyn wonders why, but she’s sure they’ll be able to figure it out. Trina says, let’s go, and Josslyn says Trina seems happier too. Trina thinks she is. She feels like things are still really horrible, but maybe they’re looking up. Josslyn tells Cameron and Dev, the chick flick awaits. Cameron says, no, and Josslyn says she thinks he’s protesting too much. They walk out together, all happy.

Carly asks if Nelle has a recording or footage of said abusive behavior, but Nelle says, no. Doesn’t Carly care that the son she raised is treating her this way? Carly says, not really, and Nelle says she’ll never see her grandchild again, and Carly’s mom is going to lose her license because Michael refused to be flexible. Carly says they’ll wait and see, and Nelle asks if she thinks Michael is going to win, and Carly says she doesn’t know who’s going to win. Who can predict that? But she can tell Nelle, she has a good feeling about it.

Sasha tells Chase, she’s waiting for that too; the feeling of, yes, it was worth it. Do her a favor. Whichever one of them it happens to first, let the other one know. If it makes him feel any better, Carly completely figured it out. Carly thinks they’re doing the right thing. So does she. Chase says he knows they are. If he didn’t, he couldn’t do it. Sasha asks if he has anything stronger, and he goes to the kitchen.

Willow says Michael is right. She does feel better, but what if someone saw? He says, no one is around. Better to hit the tree than Nelle. She says, that depends on who you ask. Michael says he’s sorry for all the havoc this insanity has caused in her life, but she says she doesn’t regret any of it. He asks how that’s possible, and she says, in whatever crazy Nelle responsible way Wiley is in her life, she can never be sorry for that. She can’t stand the thought that Nelle might win. Michael says, she won’t, and she asks how he knows. He says, because they won’t let her.

On Monday, Ava asks Nikolas if he wants a divorce, Franco says he can never escape his past, Neil attacks Julian, and Brando tells Jason that he’s staying.

The Real Housewives of New York City

It’s the start of Fashion Week, and Sonja gets her new collection together. Tinsley practices her walk, as Garo Sparo (winner, Project Runway) asked her close out his show. She gets to wear a crown, and she says, it’s the most exciting thing ever. LuAnn meets with her producer Ben. Her new show theme is Marry F*** Kill. She says, it’s always been about the Countess, but now the Countess is being naughty. She’s excited about the new show.

In her interview, Ramona says, if you don’t go to a show during Fashion Week, you’re considered a leper (yeah, I know), so she has to go, or she’ll be ostracized. Sonja says she’s been working all summer on her new collection of ready-to-wear; everything is under $250. She confers with her team, and asks about the models. In her interview, she says Fashion Week is a big hurdle, and she doesn’t want to mess it up. The girls are coming, as well as her designer friends, and it’s nerve wracking. She thinks team Sonja forgets the reason for the show is the retailers wanting to buy her collection. She swears she’s not sleeping until the show is over.

Tinsley squeals when sees the dress she’s wearing, and says, it’s so her. It is. Very fairy princessy. Dale is happy that Tinsley is back doing something. It’s been ten years. Dale dabs at her eyes, and Tinsley says she doesn’t want to cry; she’ll ruin her makeup. She says she looks like herself again, and they both cry without crying. Dale asks what wrong with them? and Tinsley says, a lot. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she was the It girl, and walked in shows. This makes her feel like she’s back to being the person she was before, and lost when moved away.

Dorinda and Sonja get out of the limo, checking their girdles and tape respectively. Tinsley is thrilled with her cute, cute dress, but not so much the sparkly sneakers. In her interview, she says most people walk the runway in heels, but she’s afraid she might trip in the sneakers. She definitely wouldn’t in heels. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, Tinsley loves a Disney themed fashion show. Maybe she’ll get her happily ever after. Ramona says they’re not her kind of clothes, but she appreciates the spectacle. Amanda Lepore takes a turn on the runway. Leah says she used to read Vogue all the time, and it’s what Tinsley was made to do; what she does best, back where she was in her heyday. Almost. In Sonja’s interview, she says Tinsley hasn’t had that spark recently, and it’s back. Garo says Tinsley turned it out, and everyone congratulates her. LuAnn says she’s back.

Backstage, LuAnn asks for a curling iron, accosting Lioc, who’s there for the models, but styles LuAnn’s hair. In her interview, LuAnn says she had to run home and change, and didn’t have time to do her hair. She used to be a model, so why not? Outside, John takes photos of Dorinda and the other woman. Ramona hogs the spotlight, insisting on posing with designer Pamela Roland, and literally pushing the people who were with her out of the way. Sonja tells LuAnn the show wasn’t for her age group, and LuAnn says the clothes were more in the not-in-her-taste group. Ramona bitches about how Tinsley left things at her Hamptons house. She tells Tinsley that she was upset by the way she left the room; she trashed it. There were soda cans and water bottles everywhere, and she stained Ramona’s duvet cover. In Tinsley’s interview, she says they’re not talking percale sheets. Ramona got them at Bed, Bath & Beyond. She’ll get Ramona a new one. She tells Ramona that she’s sorry; she’ll pay for it. They sit, but Leah isn’t there, which Ramona says is not cool. In Ramona’s interview, she says they have a great location for the fashion show. It’s a coveted thing to be in the front row. Sonja leaves messages for people about the models. She says she realized her staff wasn’t doing what she thought they were. In her interview, Ramona says she’s totally embarrassed. They’re in the front row, and Sonja should know better. It takes months of preparation for a three minute show. Can’t she put the phone away for three minutes? Sonja says she’s physically there, but mentally, she’s worried about her own show. In Dorinda’s interview, she thinks the Roland show made Sonja panic. She’s not as organized as she thought.

The women go to a restaurant. Ramona thinks she’s going to order oysters, and in her interview, Dorinda says, Ramona eating oysters is like watching a porn flick. And she guards them like Neptune’s treasure. LuAnn says Sonja was on her phone the whole time. Sonja, who’s still on her phone, says she has model fittings tomorrow. Ramona asks why that wasn’t done last week, and Sonja says, it’s the people she hired. Ramona suggests she let an intern do the work, and Sonja says, she has to negotiate prices. Nothing is free unless she gets it. She goes to sit on the side by herself, and Leah arrives. She says she needed a moment. She had a mental… not breakdown, a breakthrough. Ramona says it was rude not to show up. It was a coveted invite. Leah says her dad called, and said mother doesn’t want talk to her. Leah starts crying, and says, after a nine year period of not drinking, she decided to do it, and her mom is worried. Ramona wonders why Leah told her. In Leah’s interview, she says she texted her mom that she drank, and it’s not the end of the world. Her mom didn’t respond to her texts afterward, so she called her dad, and he said her mom is mad at her. Ramona says she’s afraid Leah will go to that deep dark place, and LuAnn asks how Leah feels about it. Leah says she has no regrets. She was in a good environment, and didn’t put herself in danger. The hangover sucks, but she thinks her mother is overreacting. LuAnn thinks talking to her wasn’t helpful. In her interview, Leah says her drinking is a trigger for her mom. She still views Leah as a wild teenager. It’s hard to accept she’s a thirty-seven year old who’s got their sh*t together. Ramona says she shouldn’t do things like that by text, but Leah says she’s a millennial. In Ramona’s interview, she says, a text is for, what time should I be there? or, I’m running late, not for this. Dorinda says she doesn’t tell her mother anything, and LuAnn says she keeps her mom in the dark. Tinsley says her mom wants the best for her, but gives her a list of what to do specifically. Like she didn’t want Tinsley’s hair curled for the show, and they got in an argument. In her interview, Leah say she wishes their argument was about the way she wears her hair, but she’s talking big life sh*t. Tinsley says she doesn’t need everyone’s advice. She can make her own decisions. Dorinda pantomimes taking out her brain. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she’s trying to be a compassionate human while listening to the argument about straight versus curly hair, but Mother Teresa couldn’t tolerate this. Ramona’s oysters come, and Dorinda asks if she only ordered for herself. Ramona says she asked if anyone wanted anything. Dorinda only listens when she wants to, because she’s more interested in hearing herself talk.

Leah meets with her Married to the Mob publicist Sloan. She says streetwear wasn’t even a term when she started. She paved the way, and fifteen years later, she’s still doing it. She wanted to wear men’s clothing lines, and thought she couldn’t be the only woman who didn’t like cutesy streetwear, so she made her own. She also hated having a boss, and got fired from every job. Sloan say she put herself in the middle of a man’s world. In Leah’s interview, she says, her type of feminism is to do whatever the boys do, but do it better. Her ex and baby daddy Rob arrives, and in her interview, she says, it’s hard for people to understand their relationship. It’s so unique. They’re basically an amazing married couple who don’t live in the same house or have sex. She tells him everything is all good, but he doesn’t think her drinking is a good idea. She asks if he thinks she’d do anything to put the life she’s worked hard for in jeopardy. He says drinking puts her on a self-destructive path. In Leah’s interview, she says Rob and her mom are like her two rocks in life. They’re both questioning her, and her mom isn’t talking to her. It’s upsetting. Rob says, it’s her prerogative, but if it starts affecting… She says they’re on the same page. He says her mother is their only helper, and they have to give her the respect she deserves. Leah gets weepy, and says she can’t believe they’re still not in a place of understanding. She’s never felt any approval from her mother, only judgement. Rob says, that’s what parents do.  

Dorinda meets with stylist Luke. In her interview, she says Sonja sent everyone a couple of options, and she was lucky enough to get a Liza Minelli-esque jacket. She tells Luke. John never misses the opportunity to make bad decisions. He doesn’t think sometimes. In her interview, she says he knows she doesn’t like some of his lifestyle choices. There was a party he wanted to go to, even though she didn’t, and he went without her. We see a clip of that, and she says he disappeared. It doesn’t make her feel good, or have a sense of security and love. Clearly, if he’s not home with her, he’s not happy. Luke says people wondered where she was. It’s a bit of disrespect. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she’s transparent as a person. She’s not worried that John is doing something naughty, but the non-transparency runs deeper. She tells Luke that she thinks the relationship gets stunted. She hasn’t returned his calls for two days.

Sonja’s show is in two hours. She takes a selfie with her team, and thinks she looks like Phyllis Diller, but no one knows who that is. She’s unhappy with the floral arrangements, and in her interview, she says, fashion people are coming. They need gorgeous flowers. Stems would be better. This is an embarrassment. She calls LuAnn, who’s in San Diego. She already had a show booked in California this month. Sonja shows LuAnn the flower disaster, and has to go. In her interview, Sonja suggests everybody pull their heads out of their asses and figure out what’s going on. She yells at everyone, and says she doesn’t want them to think or ask anything.

Leah picks up Tinsley. Tinsley remarks that Leah isn’t wearing anything Sonja, and asks if Sonja didn’t send anything to her. She sent three different dresses over to Tinsley that she loved. What she’s wearing is really pretty; a mini dress with a nude underlay, and white knit flowers on top. Leah takes what looks like a sweat suit out of a bag, and shows Tinsley, saying, that’s not athleisure. It was all she sent, along with a hat. In Leah’s interview, she says she’s pretty sure Sonja is trying to send a message. We flash back to Leah screaming, 1985 is over. She tells Tinsley, there are also these, and puts on a pair of sunglasses. She asks where the crack pipe is, since only someone high on crack would wear this. In her interview, Tinsley says she doesn’t think Sonja is capable of purposely making Leah look stupid. She probably thought it would look cool.

Ramona says she doesn’t understand what Sonja is doing, since it’s not a designer, and the clothes are already made. Sonja yells at more people, and in her interview, she says, don’t let them see you sweat, but right now, she doesn’t care what they see. The guests come first. It’s to say thank you to their supporters and get good press. John surprises Dorinda, and in her interview, she says she didn’t know he was coming. If she’s not at a party, she doesn’t see him. There’s a disconnect that she can’t get her head around, and he doesn’t even seem to acknowledge it. Tinsley and Leah come in. Leah’s dress has a print of Lil’ Kim on it, who she says is her feminist icon. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she had a skirt with Chairman Mao on it. She gets the vibe that’s going on. It’s a gangstery thing. Ramona isn’t wearing Sonja either, because it didn’t fit; she couldn’t get it zipped. Leah says, Sonja wanted her to wear pajamas. She shows them the outfit. In Ramona’s interview, she says she wouldn’t wear it either. It’s a sweat outfit; something you walk the dog in. What was Sonja thinking? Dorinda asks what Leah did to deserve that.

In Dorinda’s interview, she says, come on. Sonja knew what she was doing. Dorinda would have cut that sh*t up, midriffed it, put on a great pair of heels, and walked the runway. The show starts. I like Sonja’s pieces. I’ve checked them out before, and they are actually affordable. Backstage, Sonja says the models are fantastic, and the clothes are beautiful and fit well. Every time a model goes by, Dorinda says, Leah could have worn that. Sonja thinks the show will help them continue their relationships with retailers, and says, it all comes together when it’s supposed to. In Leah’s interview, she says she’s in the fashion industry. She’s been going to Fashion Week shows since she was seventeen, when she babysat for the editor (oddly enough) of Seventeen magazine. She knows what a fashion show looks like, and this isn’t a fashion show. Tinsley says, there was no music, and there were no lights.

Sonja asks who it is on Leah’s dress. Beyonce? She asks, what happened to the cashmere two-piece? It’s her signature, and it was in Elle. Dorinda says, the dresses would have looked great on Leah. Leah says she thinks Sonja is full of sh*t, and she’s passive/aggressive. It’s like, she’s the Downtown one. Sonja is still mad at her from the Hamptons. In Sonja’s interview, she says she can’t believe they’re doing this now. It’s her moment. She’s never giving Leah a gift again. Does Leah really think she has to time to be passive/aggressive and think it out? Sonja says she gave it to Leah in a nice bag, and Leah says, it was a paper bag that had been ripped open. Sonja asks where the sunglasses are, but there’s never an answer to this. Hmm… In her interview, Sonja says she didn’t think Leah would like a frilly dress. She’s never seen her in one, and her dresses are kind of fancy. Leah says she tried the sweats on, and she looked crazy. Sonja immediately has a couple of her people help her out of whatever it is she’s wearing, and puts on the sweats. She comes galumphing out, wearing the hat as well, and shakes her groove thing in Leah’s face. Leah says, how can she be mad at Sonja? In her interview, she says, it’s hard to stay mad when Sonja is prancing around looking like a pimp in pajamas.  

Next time, LuAnn meets with Jacques (remember him?), Leah says Dorinda that she’s scary, LuAnn tells her audience that she never hooked up with the pirate, and LuAnn drinks some vodka.

🌮 On Top Chef, Stephanie felt bad, as she was the only Padma’s Angel left. Bryan said, being in the bottom was extremely motivating. I’ll bet. We saw a clip of Last Chance Kitchen, where Karen won, and would be joining them. The Quickfire challenge was a taco throwdown for Danny Trejo (Machete, and a million other things, also one of my favorites). Along with being in films, he also owns Trejo Tacos and a donut shop. They were to make the perfect taco for him, and he told them to be creative. The box was lifted to reveal machetes, the only knife the chefs would be allowed to use. There would be immunity this time, but Padma said, from there on out, it was off the table. Most of the chefs made a fish taco of some kind. I’ve never had a fish taco, which is surprising because I love fish. I don’t know why, but I’m skeptical of them. After all the tacos were tasted, Danny said he’d buy every one of them. The bottom two were Gregory, for excessive saltiness (in his dish, not him), and Eric, whose portion size was skimpy. The chef who had everything Danny wanted in a taco was Stephanie. In her interview, she said she’d been waiting to win… something. Everyone would think she was a badass now, cooking with a machete.

The chefs were reminded that Restaurant Wars would be next week, but the battle was beginning now. The guest judges for the elimination challenge were, restaurateur Kevin Boehm, and Top Chef winner and restaurant owner Stephanie Izard. The challenge was to make it through the pitch, presenting the concept and the menu using a mood board, and making one or two dishes that were an example of the restaurant. They had to pitch and sell their idea, and the two favorites would be the restaurants in the war.

The restaurant concepts were, Kevin, with Country Captain, featuring Southern fare; Eric, with Middle Passage, featuring African cuisine; Gregory, with Kann, featuring Haitian woodfire cooking; Bryan V., with Thatcher and the Rye, he said accessible so much, I had no idea what his concept was supposed to be; Karen, with Three Black Crows, featuring modern dim sum; Lee Anne, with Hanai Mama, featuring Hawaiian food – she also explained that hanai meant adopted. We continued with, Stephanie, who presented Lucy C.’s, featuring modern, elevated comfort food (Lucy was her dog); Brian full of Malarkey presented Baja Asian, a combination that isn’t supposed to be together, but can’t help it (no surprise, his was the most dramatic of the presentations); and finally, Melissa with Sabrina, featuring modern Asian California food. She’d named the restaurant after her grandmother, who saw life in a romantic way. It’s how she wanted her food to be. Gregory pointed out that they had to be both great cooks and great salesmen for the challenge.

At the Judges’ Table, the favorites were Gregory, Kevin, Brian full of Malarkey, and Melissa. The judges said they could picture themselves eating at the restaurant, as well as the restaurant being successful. The big winners were Kevin, with Country Kitchen, and Gregory with Kann. The judges wanted to see their restaurants come to life.

On the downside were Eric, Lee Anne, and Stephanie, which we saw coming. She’d never even envisioned a restaurant for herself. The judges said she had no concept, and Stephanie had to agree. She had no focus. What she did have was immunity, so she was asked to step aside. Tom said Eric’s idea of casual, accessible food, but upscale dishes had a disconnect. The duck was overcooked, and the judges agreed his food fell short. Gail said it was so salty, it drowned out what he was trying to do. Lee Anne was told her concept wasn’t strong enough, and she admitted she hadn’t picked the right things to express it. Padma said they were both good chefs, but it was Eric’s turn to pack his knives and go. In his interview, Eric said he was disappointed in himself, and this taught him a new level of humility. He said he was still a student, and learned, not just from the judges, but everyone around him. He was hoping to redeem himself in Last Chance Kitchen.

Next time, the restaurant concepts come to life. It looks like a lot of chaos.

🏕 The advertisement for Camp Getaway said it was the opposite of adulting. That worries me. And don’t we have that already with Summer House?

🌼 Tra-La It’s May…

You’re here, Friday’s here, spring is springing, get out there if you can. See you later on the Shah side, when the season comes to a close. Except for a one or two episode of the dreaded reunion, where everyone talks at once and old wounds are opened. That Andy Cohen is an evil genius, I tell you. Stay safe, stay ready for anything, and stay (virtually) wild.

April 16, 2020 – Snake Not On a Plane, Sonja Was Not a Trophy Wife, John’s Choice, Chefs Go To Market, Camp Coming & Closer


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

I swear, I could get up at 5 am, and still be running late around 3 pm. I missed the beginning, but from what I could hear, it sounded like they were just reviewing the end of yesterday’s episode.

At the hospital, Michael tells Sasha it would be nice to paint Nelle as a demon, and have her banished to a parallel dimension. Sasha says she can picture Diane making that argument, and Michael says, Diane is so good, she’d probably make it halfway through the argument before the judge would realize, and hold her in contempt. Sasha likes the Wizard of Oz approach. Bringing Nelle and Michael up front, and dumping a bucket of water on them, to see who doesn’t melt. Carly comes by, and says, that sounds good. Sasha says she’s getting punchy, and Carly says, long hours at the hospital will do that. Who wouldn’t want to see Nelle turn into a green puddle? Michael gets serious, and says he can’t afford to think like that. If he’s wrong, Wiley pays.

At Violet’s party, Maxie tells Robert, now that Obrecht is going to the Hague, can he drop his vendetta against Peter? He says he doesn’t have a vendetta, but she says, whatever he’s calling it, instead of treating Peter like a suspect, why doesn’t he see what they have in common? He says, those they love? and she says, besides that. He says he can’t think of anything, and she says Obrecht tried to kill them both. Robert is used to bouncing back, but Peter has suffered enough. He says, that’s a matter of opinion, and Maxie says she’s known Robert literally her entire life. He says that’s why he wants what’s best for her, and she says he needs to accept what’s best for her is her own decision; like she needs to accept he’ll never see Peter for the wonderful man he is. We flash back to Robert asking Anna if it ever occurred to her that Peter could be Alex’s son. It’s her big chance to sever all ties to Faison. Anna says she’ll never abandon Peter, and Robert says, Peter is an adult, and every bit as treacherous and sadistic as his father. We move to Peter saying, Robert knows he went to Pentenville to visit Shiloh, and Robert saying, but he doesn’t know why. Why doesn’t Peter shine some light on that? We go to Robert telling Peter that his family doesn’t see the dark side of him, but they will. Peter says it kills Robert that the people he cares about, care about and love Peter. There’s nothing he can do to convince Robert, so let those they care about speak for him. Robert says Peter thinks highly of himself. It was Faison’s undoing, and will be Peter’s too. Next, Robert tells Anna that something is wrong. If she wants to deny what’s in front of her face, that’s one thing, but if she denies what’s in her heart, it might come back to bite her. We shift to Robert asking Anna how long Jason has been suspicious, and telling her that she has a Peter-sized blind spot. It’s going to get her into trouble, and when Peter goes down, Robert doesn’t want Anna going with him. There are things in the works, and they’re going to show her what her would-be son is really like. We flash back to Robert accusing Peter of shopping his deal with Sam and Jason to the AG. Peter asks why it matters, unless Robert is up to something shady. Robert thanks Peter for getting him off this production. Now it’s just Peter and Jason. He knows Jason is a trained killer, and Jason knows the truth. He’s coming to get Peter, and this time Anna’s not going to be able to save his sorry butt. In the present, Robert tells Maxie, she’s right. He’s never going to see what she does. Good party. He leaves, she sighs, and Peter walks in, no doubt from listening in the next room.

In the park, Chase tells Willow, maybe they shouldn’t have gone to the party. She says they couldn’t have missed Violet’s birthday extravaganza, but he says he sees what it did to her. She says, it’s not the party; it’s the day. He should go back. He says, and leave her alone? but she says she can handle a walk by herself; she’s resourceful. He says she’s one of the most resourceful people he knows, but it’s how it weighs on her that Nelle might get custody. She says, it’s one thing if Nelle objects to elective surgery, but what if Wiley gets worse and she still refuses? He says, Michael has excellent lawyers, and she says, but what if it’s not enough? He says she’s been more of a mother to Wiley than Nelle, and she says, but she’s not his mother.

Olivia sees Robert heading for the door, and says, sneaking out? He says, guilty. He needs her to do him a big favor. She says, it depends on what it is, and he says he has some pressing business to take care of, but he doesn’t want to disappoint Violet or Anna. She says he could play the didgeridoo one more time, and see how Anna feels. He says it’s complicated, and he needs a bit of a cover created. If someone asks if they’ve seen him, she can say she saw him in the kitchen or the garden. If she does that, he would be so much in her debt. She likes the sound of that, and says she’s got it.

On the phone, Peter says he needs the distraction now. The sooner the better. Make it happen.

Aiden goes inside, and Charlotte follows, but Ava is behind her with Avery. Ava says she’s been telling Avery about Charlotte’s horse. It’s too soon for Avery to have lessons, but Avery loves horses. Avery says she and her grandfather had a sleepover with them in the stables. Ava says maybe Avery could watch Charlotte ride, or maybe have a horse of her own. Charlotte tells Avery, the back stall at Windymere is the best. Butterscotch used to have it, but Charlotte doesn’t live there anymore. Avery asks if Charlotte used to live in the big house, and Ava says, Charlotte did, but she and Nikolas live in the house now. She takes Avery back to the party.

Aiden reaches for the piñata, but Charlotte says, don’t touch it! He says he’s not going to hurt it, and she says she’s sorry she yelled. There’s a big surprise in there, and everybody needs to be here to see it.

Jason tells Sonny, he gave Anna a heads up for him, and she said thank you. She hasn’t seen anything out of order, but she’ll keep her eyes open. Then, a half hour later, Cyrus called, asking to meet with Sonny, and for Jason to relay the message. Sonny says, one thing about Cyrus, he’s doing it the right way.

Maxie tells Peter, he missed Georgie getting her fortune told. It was quite an event, but she has it on video. He says he has Invader business to tend to, and she asks if he has to duck out. He promises it’s important, and says he already told Anna goodbye. She says she’ll stay and sit back, watching the kids fight for candy like a teeny Hunger Games, where no one has to die. He says he’ll see her later. We flash back to Maxie in the cemetery, thanking Peter for saving her and the baby, and saying, Nathan would thank him too. We move to her saying that she’s lucky to have Peter in her life, accepting the fund for Nathan, and telling him that the rest of the family will come around. Peter feels the baby kick, and Maxie says she keeps wondering who he’ll be like; her or Nathan. Peter guesses, a little of both, and she says she can’t wait to meet him. Peter says, that makes two of them. Next, Peter asks Maxie to accompany him to the Nurses Ball, Maxie goes into labor on the way, and Peter delivers the baby by the side of the road. We flash back to Maxie telling Peter that she had to atone for mistakes she made too. He says she’s come a long way; maybe there’s hope for him too. We go through their relationship so far; Peter saying she’s his only true friend, and he’ll forever be sorry for hurting her; Maxie saying that being stuck in the elevator with him, personalized her being done with bitterness, and considering she’s been forgiven, it’s her only way to pay it forward; Peter telling Maxie that he cares more about her than anyone he’s ever cared for, and Maxie saying he’s the first person who’s made her feel this way since Nathan; Peter taking Maxie to Paris on a private jet, but them getting stuck in Toronto instead. We see their first kiss, deciding to move in together, and their first Christmas when Maxie gave Peter a personalized stocking, telling him that he’s officially family and she loves him. He tells her that he never had one, and it’s funny how the smallest things get you. We end with Maxie telling Peter, nobody can come between them, except them.

Robert sneaks into Peter and Maxie’s place. We flash back to Anna telling him that he’s targeting Peter, and asking, why can’t he accept the official story? Why can’t he leave it alone? He says he can’t, and she says, there’s no immediate danger or imminent threat. He’s looked the other way before. There’s no reason for him to be digging, except for his almighty ego, and need to be right. He says he’s not going to watch her wreck herself for a murdering SOB. In the apartment, he says, okay, Henrik. Let’s see what you’re hiding.

Franco asks Aiden, what’s up? and tells him to grab the piñata. Aiden tells him, Charlotte said to leave it alone, and Franco suggests they look at it. Ava tells Elizabeth, if someone had said years ago, that Franco would find happiness showing a child a non-violent piñata, she wouldn’t have believed it. Elizabeth says, he’s changed, and Ava says he’s truly, genuinely happy, and it’s all because of Elizabeth. Elizabeth says, they’re pretty happy together, and Ava wishes she could say the same about her and Nikolas. In the beginning, she thought they were a good match; two outsiders, comforting each other. Now she’s not so sure. Elizabeth says they’re completely different people. Ava is an extrovert, and Nikolas has spent his life under the mercy of other people’s opinions. If he did something bad, it wasn’t bad enough, but if he did something good, it wasn’t good enough. He’s given up on his better angel from time to time. Ava says, no wonder he’s lonely. He puts up a great front, but when he’s home alone, he walks through the house, practically haunting it. He had such high hopes for his return, and he got what he wanted, but no one was happy for him. Elizabeth says, he did some reprehensible things. He should have thought twice about it, if he didn’t want to be held accountable. Ava thinks Nikolas thinks so too. It’s taking its toll. There’s an emptiness she can’t reach.

Chase tells Willow, it’s okay, but she says, it’s not. Wiley’s not a person to Nelle. He’s a means to an end; a weapon to use against Michael and his family. He knows Nelle better than anyone. Does he think if the worst happens, and Nelle gets Wiley, she can look past her selfish needs, and think about Wiley’s best interests? She sure as hell doesn’t. We flash back to Nelle in Charlie’s, saying she wants to change Wiley’s name to William; he’ll adjust. Willow tells her, Wiley is a person, and Nelle says she’s sick of Willow and her self-righteousness. She’ll raise Wiley how she pleases, and Willow needs to remember that her son is dead, and stay the hell away from Nelle’s. Willow throws a drink on Nelle. In the park, she tells Chase, sorry she keeps going on about it. Between her and Michael, it’s probably all he hears. He says, there’s a simple solution. It’s not easy, but the way to improve Michael’s chances in fighting Nelle is for Willow to marry him.

Michael tells Carly and Sasha, he keeps going back to Diane’s strategy. It won’t do any good to make Nelle look bad; he has to look good. Carly says, it’s not an acrimonious divorce. It’s not he said she said. Nelle’s crimes are a matter of public record. He says, if he piles it on Nele, it might make the judge more sympathetic. If he calls her out for the horrible, deranged things she’s done, it could backfire, and she could be seen as a victim. We flash back to Nelle being in the hospital, and Michael saying he’s not going anywhere. We move to Nelle saying she admires Carly as a mother. She made a mistake, but at least understand that she wanted to name the baby Morgan to honor him. Let her make things right. We see Nelle telling Michael, their son didn’t make it, and saying the crash killed him. It’s Michael’s fault. He was too busy trying to get her to confess. He says, she’s blaming him? Jonah is dead because of her. She says he was the one driving. If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s his. He hated her so much, he killed their baby. He’s ruined everything. We flash back to Nelle in jail, telling Carly, if only she’d known Jonah was alive. Brad ripped him from the safety of her arms. Carly says Nelle will never see Wiley again, and if the legal system doesn’t do it, she will. At the hospital, Carly tells Michael, Nelle is a master victim, and Michael says he has to show the court the reason he’s the best parent for Wiley.

Willow says, Chase told Sasha it was insane, but he says he’s had time to think. He sees Willow agonizing over Wiley, but it’s not his decision to make; it’s hers. If she wants to help, she’s got to marry Michael. If her decision is not to marry him, she’s got to take a step back, and let it be Michael’s problem, not hers. We flash back to Michael telling Willow, Nelle is great at faking it, but she’s the real thing. It’s like saccharine versus sugar. One tastes fine, until you have the real thing. She’s the real thing, and the judge would see her love for Wiley.

Sonny says Cyrus knows better than to contact him, so he’s using Jason as a go-between. Jason asks, why risk it? and Sonny asks if he thinks it’s a risk. Jason says Cyrus ambushed Sonny once, he could do it again. Sonny says, maybe Cyrus wants peace, and Jason says, on his terms. Sonny says, if they were his terms, Cyrus would be gone, and Cyrus knows this. Jason says, Cyrus just got out of prison. The last thing he wants is to be charged with another crime. Sonny could call his bluff by making a concession. Sonny says, that’s not going to happen. He needs to know Cyrus’s next move.

The kids gather around the piñata, and Finn says it’s the moment they’ve been waiting for. Is everybody ready? Anna asks if Violet wants to be first, but Violet says, let somebody else go. Anna spins Violet around, and she points to Charlotte. Charlotte suggests Avery have her turn, but Olivia says if they start messing with the rules, somebody’s feelings will get hurt. Charlotte approaches the piñata, takes a ribbon, and pulls.

Jason tells Sonny, Cyrus is fresh out of prison, far from his base of operations, and lost an expensive shipment. Sonny says, his partners are unhappy, and Jason says, Cyrus can’t come after Sonny unless he knows it will work. It’s Sonny’s city, and he has all the advantages. Sonny says, not all. Cyrus has the Police Commissioner under his thumb. Jason says, Jordan could give Cyrus room to maneuver, and clamp down on them. If Cyrus is free to operate, over time, it could hurt them. Sonny says, that’s the key – over time.

Aiden pulls a piñata ribbon, but nothing happens. Franco tells him, it’s okay. He’s in a perfect position to dive for candy. Violet is spun around, and points to another child. Charlotte looks nervous, but the other kids keep taking a turn, and nothing happens. Danny pulls a ribbon, but still nothing, and now Charlotte is like, come on. Avery is up, but the piñata still doesn’t open. It’s Violet’s turn, and Anna asks where Robert is. He’ll want to see this. Olivia says she thinks he’s on the patio.

Robert looks around, and opens drawers. The front doorknob turns.

The kids chant Violet’s name. She pulls a ribbon, and candy rains down. The kids drop to the floor, scrambling for it. Ava says, it’s precious, and digs in her bag, presumably for her camera. She drops the bag, and Nagini slithers out. Everyone screams, and Charlotte smiles.

On Monday, Robert confronts Spinelli about looking for dirt on Peter (we assume it’s Spinelli whose jiggling the doorknob), Laura tells Lulu that Valentin wants the same thing they all do, and Valentin tells Nikolas to stay away from his daughter.

Tomorrow, the episode from January 17, 2018 is listed in the guide. I can’t decipher exactly which one it is, since the blurb is vague, but it’s around the time of Jim Harvey and Nathan being revealed as Obrecht and Faison’s son.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Ramona has made plans for the women to visit a vineyard. In her interview, she says she wants to make sure they’re not bored and fighting, so they’re going to a winery. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, surprise, surprise. LuAnn woke up complaining about her room. We see a clip where – horrors! – the Countess saw a spider, and tells everyone she’s going to the chiropractor. The women take a limo, and go to the vineyard restaurant for lunch. Leah orders merlot. In her interview, she says she’s not an alcoholic, but didn’t like what alcohol was doing to her life. She stopped drinking, but now drinks when she wants, and she’s been drinking a bit over the last six months. Ramona gets a text from LuAnn saying she can’t make it. She got her neck cracked, and the doctor told her to take it easy. She’ll see them later. In Leah’s interview, she asks, in what world would you invite someone battling sobriety to a winery, and act surprised when they don’t want to go? It’s not a big riddle. Dorinda says after only 24 hours, they got Leah to drink. Ramona says, the weekend isn’t over yet. I didn’t see them pour Leah’s wine, but WTF? It’s like maybe two sips. Either she guzzled something when I wasn’t looking, or they are cheap with a pour. At a winery. In Ramona’s interview, she says bonding means opening up with what they’re feeling inside, and we flash back to her and Bethenny discussing their fathers. She says, that’s how they get close and get to know one another, rather than talking about superficial stuff.

Ramona tells the women, she came from a disruptive household. Growing up, she would play music, and look out the window at the clouds, wondering what was out there for her. Years later, driving back from the Hamptons, she felt like she was sixteen again, questioning what was going on with her life. Dorinda says she has goosebumps, and Ramona tells them, she said, mommy, help me. Sonja is impressed with the self-realization, and says she’d thought Ramona was avoiding the topic. In Ramona’s interview, she says it’s important in life to feel safe with a person, and it scares her that she doesn’t have that in her life. Tinsley says she has the same feeling, and she doesn’t even have a child. At least all of them have had those things, and checked them off. Ramona says, it’s not a box you check, and Dorinda says she enjoys Tinsley, but she has frustration with her. It’s like how they were talking about icebergs on the Discovery channel. As big and beautiful as they are on the surface, 90% of them are under water. She feels like she’s only seeing the tip of Tinsley. It’s not about being nosey, but getting to know her. Sonja says she didn’t even know Tinsley had a new boyfriend.

Tinsley says, Bruce is from Chicago, and has three children and two ex-wives. She’s never really been around children, and was surprised she could deal with that, and be a part of the family. She doesn’t know if it’s going to be long term; she’s not used to being one of an army of people, and wonders, where does she fit in? Leah thinks Brett is being selfish. We see a clip of Leah asking Tinsley if she feels like she’s wasting her time, and Tinsley says she always feels that way. She tells the women, she probably won’t have her own kid with this guy. Every time she sees him, it’s with his family, and she needs alone time with him. Leah says, they’re also socializing with his friends. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she doesn’t like being sixth on the totem pole.

It’s Leah’s turn, and she tells everyone, after high school, her parents sent her to rehab. When they came to get her, they told her she wasn’t coming home. In her interview, she says she was an effed up teenager, and put her parents through hell. They told her that they couldn’t have her disrupting her brother’s and sister’s lives. She tells the women, her parents told her that they couldn’t have her there, and took her to a halfway house run by nuns. They drove her to a nunnery in Upstate New York, and drove off. She wondered what was happening to her life, but later realized that her mother was trying to save her life. She had to face the consequences of the things she was doing, but it gave her perseverance. She’s been though the worst. In Ramona’s interview, she says Leah had the vulnerably to confide in them, and she has empathy, since she went through a bit of that herself

Dorinda gets weepy, and says she needs another napkin. She’s been crying for a month, and doesn’t know what’s wrong with her. She says she’s scared every day, and starts to cry. Leah asks what she’s scared of, and Ramona comes around the table and hugs her. Dorinda says everyone thinks she’s strong and able. She’s the anchor for everyone’s boat, but sometimes she wants to be the boat, and be anchored by someone else. Ramona says Dorinda is overwhelmed, and Dorinda says she’s always running the show. Ramona says Dorinda does for everybody, and in Dorinda’s interview, she says, life is heavy. She wakes up worried, and goes to bed worried, and has no one to share the burden with. John never had these kinds of responsibilities. She’s tapped out. Leah says the pressure is always on women to do everything.

Ramona says Sonja is next. Sonja says she’s at the point Ramona was, wondering how she got there. She runs around, pays the bills, and has one foot in the nursing home. She didn’t sign up for this. Then you die. Dorinda says, she thought they were supposed to be expressing their hearts, and Leah wonders where the oxygen tank is. In her interview, Dorinda says, Sonja has had a couple of drinks, and she’s talking about everything except what makes her vulnerable. Stop her. Ramona looks at her phone, and says she’s checking on where she’s having her party. In her interview, she says she’s having a fabulous cocktail party at Joe Ferrell’s home. It’s stunning, and the women’s mouths are going to drop.

Back at the house, Tinsley tells Leah, she went on a date with Joe, and it was the lamest date ever. It was a basketball game. Leah says, and he didn’t even feed her or anything. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she found out he’d also dated Bethenny. He wasn’t her type, and she doesn’t think he drinks either.

LuAnn gets back, and in her interview, she says she didn’t want to miss any bonding, but she’s glad she took care of her neck. She didn’t sleep well, and between the spiders and the smell, she’s not comfortable. Dorinda asks how Ramona’s afternoon was, and Ramona admits she had had date. In her interview, Dorinda says she’s never seen a person slip in and out of dates so quickly. It’s like sliding doors. We flash back to Ramona leaving various events for a date, and Dorinda says, it’s impressive. Ramona says he was Persian, sexy, and more flirtatious than she is.

Ramona tells LuAnn to come to her bathroom to do makeup. LuAnn goes upstairs, and in her interview, Ramona says LuAnn’s floral dress does not belong in the Hamptons. It belongs in Nantucket or Atlanta. In LuAnn’s interview, she says she’s glad she missed lunch. By the looks of it, Sonja was over-served, and they’re not even at the party yet.

On the way to the party, in one limo, Ramona tells Dorinda that Joe is a major developer. In the other limo, LuAnn tells Sonja that she’s interested to see the house. Sonja says, Ramona is a social butterfly, who needs to be knocked down a notch. It’s not a good look. Sonja says she’s trying to hang onto her long term friends, but Ramona is more interested in the rent-a-crowd, party filler people. In Sonja’s interview, she says, Ramona is showing off her fancy friends, but it’s just another boring party, with stiff people, and a lot of small talk. She thinks Ramona forgot what’s important in life.

The house, named Sandcastle, is massive, and there’s a humongous mirror in the entryway. Ramona says she’s in love with it, which is no surprise. LuAnn says the house is for sale, and Sonja says no wonder they were invited. She realizes that the four of them sharing the limo – her, LuAnn, Tinsley, and Leah – all have mug shots. Leah’s says, it’s a bunch of weird white people, and in her interview, she says, it’s not the type of party she’s used to. It’s weird Eyes Wide Shut sh*t. By the end, she’s going to be taken to a back room and made to be someone’s bitch. (I just have to interject that I had a hard time keeping my eyes wide open when I saw Eyes Wide Shut. It wasn’t nearly as interesting as I thought it would be, and that one-note piano score was sleep inducing.) Sonja is disappointed that there’s no gin, and goes for Tito’s. Ramona introduces everyone, and Sonja says she’s being so formal. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, Sonja lived like Ramona is pretending to. Sonja tells Ramona, they might be in a $39 million home, but act like she’s in her $7 million home; she likes to be down-to-earth. In Ramona’s interview, she says, with Sonja, she has to bring herself down, while with her other friends, she has to elevate herself.

Ramona accuses Leah of chewing gum, like it’s a crime, and Leah says, no, she’s not. She walks outside with Tinsley, and says she swallowed it. Ramona’s eyes scared the hell out of her. She saw Ramona’s eyes, and just swallowed the gum. Ramona just scolded her, but she’s not from the royal family. Inside, Sonja says she thinks Leah is classy, but doesn’t look classy; she’s rough around the edges. Ramona thanks Joe for letting her use the house. In her interview, Tinsley says, it’s weird seeing Joe. She thinks he and Ramona would make a good couple. The way Ramona is batting her lashes, he seems to be into it. She tells Leah, Ramona is flirting as usual. In her interview, Leah says, Joe seems like a nice older gentlemen. Men who are short and unattractive still have women running after them if they have money. It’s the world we live in. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, it’s hard not to drink. The bar is there, and everyone is drinking. She was hoping Leah would be her wingman by not drinking, but it’s not happening. She’s lost her sober companion.

Ramona gathers everyone for a house tour, and they check out the bowling alley in the basement. The women are impressed, and Joe says his house just made him hotter. In her interview, Leah says, exhibit A. She rests her case. Tinsley is having a hard time bowling in heels, and gets a gutter ball. On the way downstairs, Dorinda tells LuAnn that she thinks touring houses is tacky. In her interview, Dorinda says she lived with her husband in London, and they don’t do house tours. You see the living room and the dining room, and maybe the kitchen. Maybe. LuAnn and Dorinda do some bowling, and LuAnn gets a strike. In another room, Joe shows them a half pipe he had put in for his son, and a DJ booth. There’s also a swing that can be hoisted to the ceiling, and when Ramona goes up in it, it makes me nervous. It’s not like there’s a seat belt.

Mutual friend Elyse joins them, and Dorinda says she was married to a hedge fund guy. They discuss clothes, and Elyse says she’s not a huge shopper. Investments, yes; clothes, no. Sonja says her husband always bought her clothes, and Elyse says Sonja was his accessory. Sonja takes offense, insisting they were partners. Elyse says Sonja was a trophy wife, and Sonja starts to get loud, telling Elyse to clip it. Elyse says, Sonja brought men to their knees, and Sonja keeps repeating, take it back, until Elyse takes it back. Sonja says, Tinsley was a trophy wife, which annoys Tinsley. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she and Topper met at boarding school, and they were the same age. Sonja was a hostess when she met her husband, who was a hundred. That’s the definition of a trophy wife. Sonja announces that she doesn’t shave her p*ssy. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, Sonja is drunk, but she doesn’t think Elyse should be talking like that. It’s no one’s business to pass judgement on what roll any of them played in their husbands’ lives. LuAnn tells Dorinda, Sonja is off the rails, and shouldn’t have kept drinking. She’s going to be out like a light. Dorinda says, or it will be batten down the hatches.

The women check out the buffet, and LuAnn wants someone to tell her why she left her own beautiful house to spend the weekend in Ramona’s basement. It smells like dog piss. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, the room is also fully stocked with liquor. She noticed. Sonja tells Ramona to go sit with her rich friends. She’s treating them like chicken liver. Everyone is like, um… that’s chopped liver. In Ramona’s interview, she says, when Sonja acts like this, it’s no wonder she’s not invited to certain events. Sonja says they’re not important to Ramona, and Dorinda says, Sonja is on a roll. Leah sits down, and Sonja points to a young guy sitting at the table, saying he wants to have sex with her. Leah says, who wouldn’t want to have sex with her? In Leah’s interview, she says, watching Sonja eye-f*** this dude is the best part of the whole party. She wonders if Sonja would say, never mind, if he had a tattoo. She doesn’t think so. The guy asks if Sonja wants a drink, and Ramona suggests he get Sonja some club soda. Sonja tells him, just show her his driver’s license, and they’re good to go. She has an amazing vagina. LuAnn joins them, wondering what’s happening, and Sonja asks how her p*ssy is. LuAnn looks down, and says, it’s all still there. Sonja says she stole the show, but they’re not getting laid tonight. It’s all quite astonishing. And astonishing that Sonja is invited anywhere.

In her interview, Leah says, Sonja is not just entertaining, she’s embarrassing. They get up from the table, and Sonja says Ramona is a party popper [sic]. Ramona says, the party is over, and Sonja says, Ramona is over. She tries to latch on to a guy going past, and LuAnn says he’s married and has a baby. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it’s like Godzilla has been let loose, and Godzilla is drunk. Ramona steers them all out, and a guy named Eddie asks if every night is like this.

Sonja tries to go back, but Dorinda says, no, you’re not. Sonja says Dorinda is getting in between her and her vagina. Dorinda wonders why Sonja does this to herself – and them.

I’ve been wondering why I like this show when it’s just as drama laden as RHOBH. The lightbulb came on just now. The women are just as self-centered, and sometimes as mean, as the women in Beverly Hills. But when they’re mean, it’s because they want attention or they’re thoughtless – not because they’re deliberately being cruel or want to get back at each other. Huge difference. Same drama, but different intention. It’s kind of like the difference between 2 Broke Girls and King of Queens. The people are both awful, but on 2 Broke Girls, you know when push came to shove, they’d do anything for one another or even to help a stranger. On King of Queens, they’d trample each other to get to a fire exit. But they’re not real, so it can be funny. Okay, digression – and commercial break – over.

It’s 10 am, when Dorinda knocks on Ramona’s door. She says, there’s a problem. LuAnn left, and she’s written an out-of-control text. Ramona says she saw a car pull out last night, and thought someone stole her car. Dorinda doesn’t know why she was cc’d, and reads the text addressed to Ramona. LuAnn says, it’s not the fish room part two. She has an amazing home, and there, she had to share a bathroom with someone she didn’t know or be in the basement, where there’s dog piss and spiders. She’s always lowest on the totem pole when it comes to rooms. Ramona says she asked LuAnn if she wanted a room on the  ground floor, and thinks LuAnn just wanted to go home. Dorinda wonders why LuAnn can’t just say she doesn’t want be downstairs, and that it feels lonely. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, LuAnn always has an issue with the room. We flash back to Vermont, when LuAnn whined that she was just married and back from Palm Springs, so her room could have been nicer; and Great Barrington, where LuAnn griped that the best room was being saved for Bethenny, who’d just been through a tragedy. Dorinda says, and Ramona’s house. Dorinda thinks there’s a theme going on here.

Ramona calls LuAnn, and gets voicemail. Dorinda tells her to be careful with what she says. Ramona says she hopes LuAnn got home safe. She’s sorry LuAnn felt isolated, and that she wasn’t being more aware of how LuAnn felt. She was concentrating on superficial things, when it was important to bond, and she never meant to make LuAnn feel that way. She asks LuAnn to come back, and she’ll try to make it up to her. I’m kind of surprised, since Ramona actually sounds sincere. She tells Dorinda that LuAnn felt rejected, and she gets that. In her interview, Ramona says she doesn’t want LuAnn to feel bad. She was preparing for eight women, cooking, cleaning, and shopping, and effed up.

Sonja wonders what happened last night, and thinks she had a great time. Ramona asks if she’s straight yet, and tells her about LuAnn leaving at 1 am. In Sonja’s interview, she says LuAnn was humbled by her probation for ten seconds. Now everything’s not good enough. Sonja reads the text, and they all want to see the basement, and troop downstairs. Sonja deems it a party palace. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it was either sleeping in the guest room, or being home. A bed, television, and bathroom is enough.

Ramona’s phone rings. It’s LuAnn.

Next time, Ramona and LuAnn have a tennis match; a cute dog groomer comes to groom Marley, and LuAnn says she’d like to be groomed; a game of beer pong is played; Leah goes off the deep end; and Ramona wails over the remnants of a very messy party.

📡 John Olivier and LuAnn were guests on Watch What Happens Live (quarantine edition), and John was too funny. He was enthralled with next week’s RHONY preview, and how it went from, I think there’s vodka in that, to I think she’ll be okay, to a naked Leah pulling a tiki torch out of the ground, to a guy nobody knows saying, I think I should go. He said, if someone would ask which he liked better, that or Parasite, he would say Parasite, but he’d be lying.

👨🏾‍🍳 On Top Chef, the chefs arrived to find stations for each of them, with utensils, aprons, and tablets. They each got a phone call from a loved one; wives, moms, sisters, and friends, and chatted for a while. Padma came in and told them to gather around. Their loved ones were going to be an integral part of the Quickfire challenge. They were all at Mozza, an upscale restaurant, and the chefs would have to replicate whatever dish their person was eating, using their instructions given over the phone. The dish had to look and taste the same, but a photo couldn’t be texted. They had thirty minutes to cook the dish, which I probably don’t have to point out, isn’t very long. As usual, the winner would be exempt from elimination, but they would also receive $10K courtesy of the show’s partner, Metro. Kevin said the run for ingredients reminded him of the streets of Manhattan; everyone was running around like lunatics, wearing headphones, and screaming at someone no one else could see. Since each loved one had a different set of communication skills, it was pretty funny to watch the chefs try to decipher what it was they were going to make. After cooking/plating time was up, a photo of the dish was texted to them, so they could see how close they came. Guest judge Nancy Silverton, owner of the Mazzo restaurant group, and whose dishes were being reproduced, was introduced. Bryan had a totally different dish, so it was the least favorite, but Nancy made a point of saying it was still delicious. Kevin was the winner (aw! I like him), and he called his wife, saying that her being super detail oriented panned out. In his interview, he said his successes had always been because of her, and he was glad they got the opportunity to enjoy the victory together.

Nancy explained that, in addition to her restaurants, she was also an entrepreneur. She had the Bakery Bread company, and was starting a gelato line called Nancy’s Fancy. The chefs were to create a signature product to bring to the Westfield Century City Food Festival. They would be giving out samples of food using their creation, and the shoppers would each get one ticket to receive one product. The chefs’ loved ones would assist them in the making of the product, and they were given $600 to shop at Whole Foods. While making dumplings, the kitchen got a little too hot for Lee Anne’s mom, who came close to fainting, and had to lie down. In Lee Anne’s interview, she said her mom was her main consideration, but she still had to be in the competition – alone – and finish a million dumplings. Okay, it was really 150. Several of the others came to rescue, and she said she was touched that she had great people willing help. I was pretty impressed with that myself. Afterwards, Bryan ranked the others in a notebook, no surprise, putting himself at the top. He’s starting to get on my nerves.

At the food festival, the chefs labeled their products. Melissa ended up being the top seller, receiving tickets for 31 bottles of kimchee vinaigrette. She said she’d wanted to create a versatile product, which seemed to be key. Nancy picked Gregory as the winner of the challenge with some Haitian pickled veggies that I wouldn’t mind a jar of. The bottom three were Stephanie, Jennifer, and Bryan full of Malarkey. In his interview, he whined that his product sold well, and tasted amazing, because he knows better than the judges. Stephanie was told her marinara sauce was nothing different than was already out there. Bryan’s salsa whatever was oily, and Tom said it was confusing as to what he was actually selling. Stephanie’s ginger lemon sauce, which sounded like a good idea, was deemed not smooth enough by Tom, and Nancy thought Stephanie had diluted the flavor by mixing in yogurt. Tom did say he was impressed with how quickly the chefs all came up decent product on the first try, saying it had taken twelve times for him to get his first product correct. He also conceded that in a crowded market, it was hard to get something to stand out.

While I was hoping Bryan would be packing his knives and going, it was Jennifer who was moving on to Last Chance Kitchen. She says she was from Philly, and Rocky kept coming back. In her interview, she told us, the competition had done so much good for her; she’d learned a lot about herself. She started off wanting things done her way, and it motivated her to be better. She now accepted that she makes mistakes, and wanted to learn. Her best memory was going to be cooking with her sister. The loss couldn’t change how happy the challenge made her.

Next time, the elimination challenge will be a celebration of the 100th Anniversary of the L.A. Philharmonic, the chefs will pair up, and it will be a double elimination. In the preview, Lee Anne said shopping with Bryan was like shopping with monkeys on crack.

🏕 Coming May 4th

I’m hoping this isn’t like Summer House at camp, but it looks like it probably is.

👯‍♂️ But Not Too Close…

We’re getting there, and I hope in the meantime, you’re getting up and getting dressed. No slippers before 6 pm, and make that bed. Unless you don’t normally make your bed, then disregard that. Stay safe, and wear that mask with pride.

April 9, 2020 – The Other Half Of the Necklace, a Sleepover In the Hamptons, Trolls Inspire Chefs & Rainbow


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Sasha finds Willow at the hospital, and hugs her. Willow says, don’t tell Chase she was crying, but Sasha says, he probably figured it out; he’s a sharp guy. Willow says she knows she’s too close to this, and has to get emotional perspective. Sasha says she’s learned something about stress while developing spa products for Deception. The body doesn’t differentiate between physical, mental, and emotional stress. It doesn’t know the difference, and emotional stress is often the toughest to deal with. Willow says, okay. So she’s a wreck. Sasha says, the next part is just her theory, but she thinks Willow’s body can’t tell the difference between her love for Wiley when Willow thought he was her son, and now.

Chase tells Michael, he realizes Wiley is a priority, and Michael says, Willow is too. She’s more than a friend, and important in Wiley’s life. He can see what this is doing to her, and if it helps, she doesn’t have to testify in the custody hearing. Chase says, that will just make it worse. Willow needs to feel like she’s doing something positive for Wiley. If her getting on the stand will tip the scale, even a little bit, she’ll be thrilled. She’d do anything for that little boy. We flash back to Willow in court against Shiloh when he thought Wiley was his son. She says she had a baby, but Shiloh will never find him. He’s evil and vile. Diane tells her, stop talking, but she continues to go off on Shiloh. She says the only thing Shiloh cares about is himself. He’ll never, ever find her child. The judge tells Diane to handle her client, and Diane tells Willow to sit down. The judge says Willow admitted to having a baby, and has to turn the records over to the court. Willow says she won’t, and he cites her for being in contempt. Chase cuffs her, and reads her rights.

Nina tells Jax, after the disaster that was Sasha, she accepted the fact that she miscarried, and moved on. But she’s still holding on to that stupid necklace. Jax says he’s seen her holding it, and she says her mother gave it to her. Her mother hated her, and tried to kill her twice, once by accident, and once on purpose, because she wanted to get her hands on Nina’s money. She left the necklace in a box of things she’d bequeathed to Nina, along with a cryptic note. Two halves come together to mend a broken heart. Nina couldn’t help thinking maybe the baby survived.

Nelle says Carly should have known her, and welcomed her as a sister. Carly says, they’re not… related. Nelle says she can’t even say the word – sisters. That’s how much she hates it, and wishes it wasn’t true. They have the same father, and that makes them sisters. Carly says Frank wasn’t her father. He was a loser her adoptive mother married, and he ghosted them before she had a chance to know him. They only met once. She tracked him down in a crap apartment in Miami, trying to get a fraction of the child support he owed her mother. Nelle says he wasn’t Carly’s father until she wanted money, and Carly says she didn’t get one dime. She didn’t know Nelle was Josslyn’s kidney donor, or that Frank even had a daughter. Nelle says, she knew. Carly saw her.

Miami, 1995. Young Carly goes to an apartment. Frank opens the door (James Patrick Stuart, Valentin), and asks if he can help her. She says, Frank Benson? and he says, who’s asking? She says, Caroline Benson, and he says, Virginia’s little girl? How did she find him? She says, Ken Richardson knew someone who knew someone who knew his address. He says she’s lucky. They’re leaving soon. He has a business opportunity that’s a pretty sweet deal. She wonders if he’s even going to ask about her mom, and he says, how’s her mother? Still the same? Carly says she’s doing well, and he asks if they’re still in the same house, but Carly says they moved when she was in first grade for a neighborhood with better schools. He says she’s all grown up, and asks what she wants from him. She says he owes her mother fourteen years of unpaid child support. She’s there to collect. He says she must have her wires crossed. Virginia was the one who wanted to adopt her. Carly says, he didn’t want her, so he shouldn’t have pay? He says, if she wants to put it like that. A little girl comes out, and asks who she is.

Jason tells Josslyn, he doesn’t think Nelle can do or say anything that outweighs the facts. She asks if he thinks Michael will win, and he says, the facts are on Michael’s side. She says it’s cool how he sees things so clearly, and he says, not always. She says, more than the others do. She wishes he’d been there when Nelle first got to Port Charles. He would have seen right through her. We flash back to Nelle seeing Josslyn in the MetroCourt. She says it’s been a while, and Josslyn says, things have been tense between Nelle and her family. Nelle agrees, but they’re cool, right? Besides, they’re kind of family now. Josslyn is going to be the baby’s aunt. Is she ready for that? We move to Nelle asking if Josslyn is okay with her marrying Michael. Josslyn says she thought Nelle and Michael belonged together. It’s just that right now… Nelle says, Josslyn is thinking about her mom. She’s been thinking about Carly too. Sonny says he bets she has, and Nelle says she’s hoping Carly gets better, comes home, and accepts the baby, and her along with it. Josslyn hopes she’s right, and Nelle says she has one favor to ask. Will Josslyn be her maid of honor? Josslyn hesitates, but says, yes, of course (🍷). We move to Josslyn giving Nelle a beautiful hair clip on the day of the wedding. Josslyn says it belonged to her grandmother. She gave it to Josslyn’s mom, and her mom gave it to her. She’s loaning it to Nelle. It can be her old, borrowed, and blue, but she needs it back. Nelle says, of course (🍷). Josslyn says she thought Nelle should have something that tied everything together, other than Michael and the baby. Nelle suggests they take a photo to send to Josslyn’s mom, so she can see something that will tie her to the wedding, even if she can’t be there. In the present, Jason tells Josslyn, if Nelle never came, there would be no Wiley. Josslyn says, maybe not. Wiley is worth everything.

Nelle tells Carly, she came to see them just before they moved to Tampa. Her father was excited; he’d missed Carly. Her father asked Carly to stay and spend time with the family. Carly says, that didn’t happen, but Nelle says, she heard the whole thing. Carly says, oh my God. She was there. The little blond girl was her. Nelle says, Frank wanted them to be sisters, and asked her to stay. Why didn’t she? Everything would have been different. Carly could have taken care of her, but Carly was too selfish. She didn’t care that they traveled around and moved all the time, chasing deals that never closed. They were always poor, but Carly just wanted to come to Port Charles and have a fabulous life, and that’s what she did. She left Nelle. In 1995, Frank tells Nelle to go to the kitchen and have some cereal; he’s busy. Nelle says they don’t have any, and he says, then have a cookie. Carly says she guesses Frank wanted Nelle, but has no money for her. He says, not a dime, and she says, okay. Then tell her about her birth parents.

Nina tells Jax that Valentin visited her mother in prison before she died. Her mother told him that Nina had carried the baby to term; a little girl who was given up for adoption. Jax wonders if Valentin was lying to set the groundwork for Sasha. Nina doesn’t think he did, but her mother could have been lying out of spite. She was very jealous of Nina, and the money she’d inherited. Maybe it was one last dig at her. He says she doesn’t sound convinced, and Nina says, no. She just has a feeling she can’t shake. An instinct that she has a daughter out there somewhere.

Nelle tells Carly, everything that happened was because Carly couldn’t be bothered to take care of her. What Frank said was the truth. Carly says, it’s not true. Frank never asked her to stay. He sent Nelle into the other room, and said he didn’t have any money and never wanted to adopt her. He didn’t consider Carly a daughter. He knew her mother was Barbara Jean Spencer, and knew she’d moved to Port Charles. Later, he found out Carly had moved there and had money. That’s when he began calling her his daughter. Nelle says, he kept Carly’s baby rattle, but Carly says he was probably going to pawn it, but forgot. He gave Nelle a story, twisting things so he’d look good. He sold Nelle’s kidney. He was a weak selfish man who exploited Nelle, but she doesn’t have to be like him. She can go in a different direction. Carly did. After she had Michael, she realized she could be better. Not perfect, but she could give Michael what he needed, and put him first. When she did, her life was better. Nelle can do that; put Wiley first. Nelle says, by handing him over to Michael, and Carly says, let Michael have full custody, and she’ll have visitation rights. She can build a relationship with Wiley, while Wiley stays in a home that he knows, and where he’s happy. Nelle says, happier than he’d be with her, because she can never be good enough. Carly says Nelle has a chance prove she’s good enough, and give up what she wants, so Wiley can have what he needs. Nelle says Carly wants her to give up the suit too. If Carly thinks she’s going to let get Monica and Bobbie get away with malpractice, think again. She’s going to leave the hospital bankrupt, and it’s Carly’s fault. All of it is Carly’s fault. Nelle never did anything Carly didn’t do. We flash back to Nelle telling Carly that she has an idea everyone is going to love. Whether the baby is a boy or girl, she’s going to name it Morgan. We move on to Nelle planting a scarf like Morgan’s in Carly’s office, saying, let the haunting begin, and Carly finding it, making the connection. We move to Nelle leaving Carly the note that says, find me where you left me tonight, and spraying Morgan’s cologne in the graveyard. Carly arrives there, and says she knows that smell, and calls out to Morgan. We see Nelle and Carly struggle over the baby blanket, and Nelle falling down the stairs. We move to Nelle telling Carly that Michael proposed, and saying she can call Carly mom.

Carly says Nelle sounds like Frank, and Nelle says, see you in court, sister. She leaves, and we go back to young Carly. Carly tells Frank, her mom said he handled the adoption. Who were they? He says, who knows? and she says, he does. She knows the adoption agency rejected them, but he told Virginia he could still find her a baby. He had connections; who was it? He tells her not to ask questions she doesn’t want the answer to, and she says, they can’t be worse than him. Tell her. He says he doesn’t know who her father is, and doubts her mother would know, given her profession. She was a hooker, and Carly’s father was one of her many johns. Her madam said they could adopt her for a fee. It was more than he was willing to spend, but Virginia had to have a baby. Carly asks for a name, and Frank says, what does it matter? He tells her it was Ruby Anderson’s house. Her mother was Ruby’s niece, Barbara Jean Spencer. Carly asks if he knows what happened to her, but he doesn’t. He says, given her choice of profession, he hopes Carly isn’t looking for a warm and fuzzy reunion. She tells him, go to hell, and he says don’t blame him if she doesn’t like the answers to her questions. Give his regards to Virginia. Maybe he’ll look her up. Carly says, try it, and she’ll kill him.

Michael tells Chase, Nelle is a nightmare, but she did do good. Chase says, Wiley? and Michael says, all of it. Willow loved Wiley for a year and a half when she thought he was her child, but when she found out he wasn’t hers, her love wasn’t wasted. She’s part of Wiley’s life, and that wouldn’t have happened without Nelle. We flash back to Willow sitting with Wiley in Kelly’s, and telling him that she wants to be his mother, but that’s what she wants. She knows he wants to be with the family he has; Brad and Lucas. She’d never take him away from the daddies he loves. She prays they have their own relationship, and someday when he’s old enough, and comes to her with questions, he’ll understand why she chose to leave him, because she wants his happiness more than her own. She is his mommy, and loves him with all her heart. We move to Willow asking Chase if they’re at the point where she has to check in with him to say yes to being her own son’s guardian. He asks if there’s not an app for that. He’s not surprised; she deserves to be his guardian. She obviously loves him.

Sasha says, Willow went to jail rather than admit Shiloh was Wiley’s father. Willow says, he wasn’t, but Sasha says, that’s not the point. Her instinct as a mom was to protect at any cost, and that didn’t change when she found out Wiley wasn’t her biological child. Willow says he’s at risk from a vile, selfish woman who wants to use him as a weapon. Of course (🍷) she wants to protect him. But it’s not enough to be protective. She has to do something. We flash back to Willow telling Chase that Wiley isn’t her child by birth, but she’s part of his life. He’s not Michael’s child, but Michael loves him anyway, and she doesn’t love him any less. Chase says she didn’t feel that way before; it was the exact opposite. She says she misses him so much, and Chase says, before she makes a decision, take a breath. He knows Michael is thinking about what’s best for Wiley, but he’s thinking about what’s best for her. At the hospital in the present, Sasha says Willow is the closest thing Wiley has to a mother; Nelle doesn’t count. Willow says, Wiley needs her, and she’s got to stand up for him.

Nina tells Jax, it’s not irrefutable, but it’s a custom piece, so there’s no way to trace it. He says he knows a good security firm who could retrace her mother’s movement after Nina went into the coma. She says, Valentin already did that, and Jax says just because Valentin failed, doesn’t mean he will. She appreciates it, but she’s not sure she wants to set herself up for disappointment. It’s a deep dark rabbit hole she’s already been down, and she’s not sure she wants to risk it again. Josslyn comes in, and Jax asks what she’s doing on the loose. She says she was going stir crazy at Sonny’s. One of the bodyguards drove her over. If he’s busy… Nina says, no. Josslyn’s father is distracting her from what she needs to do. Josslyn would be doing her a favor to get him out. Jax asks if he can take Josslyn to lunch, but she says she has volleyball practice. He can drive her though; the bodyguard can follow them. He says he’ll see Nina later. As they leave, he says, maybe Josslyn should drive. She says, in that case, let’s take the Porsche.

Carly goes to see Jason, who says, she just missed Josslyn. Carly asks what she was doing there, and Jason says Josslyn wanted him to promise Nelle won’t get Wiley. She asks what Jason told her, and he says he told her it was too soon for promises. They have to see how it plays out. Carly wishes he’d said tomorrow Nelle was going to magically disappear, and then made that happen.

Jason asks if Carly thinks Michael could live with that. We flash back to Carly telling Sonny that Michael will never retaliate against Nelle; not in any real way that makes a difference. That’s why they have to make the decision for him. They have to remove that psycho bitch from their lives, once and for all. We move to Carly telling Michael to let Diane crush Nelle; no backing off. No convincing himself to compromise for Wiley’s sake. Michael says, there is no compromising with Nelle. He has to win sole custody, for Wiley’s sake. In the present, Carly tells Jason that Michael is a better person than she is, and he says he thinks they’re both good people.

Jacksonville, 1996. Carly is ready to leave, when Virginia comes in. She says, good; Carly is still there. Carly says she wanted to say goodbye, and Virginia asks if she’s supposed to thank Carly; she’s still leaving. Carly says wish her good luck, and Virginia says, luck is a lie. Carly says she’d rather take the lie than be stuck there. Virginia says, thanks. She doesn’t want to fight. She loves Carly. Carly says she knows, and loves Virginia too. Virginia hopes Carly finds what she’s looking for – which isn’t money. Carly says, maybe not, but it wouldn’t hurt. Virginia says what Carly is looking for is love, and to be valued and accepted. She hopes Carly finds that, and hopes she finds someone who believes in her. Carly says she believes in herself, and Virginia says she believes in Carly, but Carly doesn’t want to hear that from her. She wants to figure it out on her own, and she will. They hug, and Carly picks up her bags. She says, here goes nothing, and leaves. In 2020, Carly tells Jason, she went to see Nelle at Crimson. It’s okay, but they had it out. Nelle unloaded her grudges, and said what she blames Carly for. At one point, Carly tried to explain how she turned her life around. How she’d been a liar, but managed to change into a halfway decent person. Jason says, more than halfway. Carly says, she told Nelle it was because of Michael, but it was also because of Jason.

Carly tells Jason, the night she showed up on his doorstep, she had nowhere else to go. he let her in, and it changed everything. She’d never had that. She should feel sorry for Nelle, and she almost does, but she’s mostly grateful to have Jason. We flash back to Carly hugging Jason, and says she can’t believe he’s there. He’s alive. She missed him so much. There’s so much she wants to tell him, and say to him. He tells her, take a deep breath, and count to ten. We move on to Carly visiting Jason in the hospital, and telling him about being pregnant with Donna. She says he has to do whatever she wants for the next seven months. He says, if that’s what she needs, they’ll figure it out. Tell him about the baby. She says she’s scared, nervous, and surprised. She never thought she’d be having another baby, but now that she knows, she’s excited. He says he’s excited for her. We move to Jason telling Carly that he would have done anything to get her out of that place; even team up with Franco. He’s sorry she got taken to Ferncliff. She says she knew he’d get her out, and he says he should have that night, but he let himself be talked into waiting. Carly says, she let herself be talked into pleading insanity. They both messed up. From now on, they trust their own instincts, especially when it comes to each other. Deal? He says, deal. She says she knew he’d come to get her, and he did. In the present, Jason says, the night Carly showed up was the best thing that ever happened to him. They hug.

Nina looks at the necklace for the 47,506th time. She flashes back to giving the other half to Sasha at Windymere. Sasha says she can’t, and Nina says, of course (🍷) she can. Obrecht says, it’s a significant gift, but Sasha says, it’s too much. Nina says there’s no such thing when it comes to Sasha. It’s not the original, but she had it made, and it fits her piece. She puts the necklace on Sasha, and says, it’s a perfect fit, just like them. We move on to Nina’s wedding, and Nina telling Sasha, all she needs to do is tell everyone she’s Nina’s daughter. Sasha says she’s sorry, but she’s not. Nina says Sasha lied to her with every beat of her heart. She doesn’t have a heart; she’s nothing. Nina pulls the necklace off of her.

Nelle goes through her trinket box, flipping through letters that were returned, and looking at Carly’s baby rattle. We see the other half of the necklace still in the box, and then a split-screen with Nina looking at it.

On Monday, Nina says, maybe she’s more like Nelle than she wants to admit; Laura meets with Valentin; and Lulu says she’s come to say goodbye to someone in jail. In Port Charles, this could be anyone.

👍🏽 This is amazingly clever. Not only are they stretching out the episodes with these flashbacks, anyone who’s home and just beginning to watch, or watching after a long time of not seeing the show, is filled in. And those of us who’ve kept up are still getting a new backstory. To top it off, we’ve gotten a possible reveal as to who Nina’s daughter is, or another layer in that mystery. I’m beyond impressed. Good job, GH!

The Real Housewives of New York City

As Sonja and Tinsley walk to a rooftop for lunch, Sonja says, guys keep trying to pick them up; ignore them. They sit down with their food, and Tinsley says Sonja was jumping on the Dorinda bandwagon. She’s acting like she doesn’t know Tinsley, and she’s not open and honest. Sonja tells her, she said Dorinda didn’t know Tinsley, and Tinsley says, Dorinda is calling her a liar. She’s saying Tinsley was still with Scott when she wasn’t. Sonja says Tinsley went on a trip with him, and Tinsley says, when they were broken up, there was no arrangement for her to get money from him. In Sonja’s interview, she says she’s heard that Tinsley and Scott have been together since they broke up. Tinsley is the only woman she knows who’s gotten clothes and bling after a break-up. Leah joins them, and Sonja says they were talking about Dorinda claiming Tinsley isn’t being truthful. Tinsley tells her, she can only say it so many times. Dorinda turned on her when she’s always been a friend. In Leah’s interview, she says, maybe Tinsley confides in her and Sonja because they don’t call her a hooker. If Dorinda treated her that way, she wouldn’t tell the bitch what she had for lunch. Tinsley says Dorinda was implying she’s not being truthful, but she’s allowed to go back and forth in a relationship. It’s her effing life. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she didn’t know she had to share every detail of her relationship with Dorinda. Leah tells them, Ramona called her, and wants her to come to the Hamptons. Sonja asks if Leah has any tattoos, and Leah says she has several, but she’s having the tramp stamp of her name removed. It was her first tattoo. Sonja asks if she had her name put there, so when she’s having sex, the guy can remember her name. In Sonja’s interview, she says she thinks tattoos are a negative thing. You’re defecating you’re body. She realizes what defecating means, and settles on defaming. And actually, I think what she really meant to say is defacing. Read a book once in a while, Sonja. She tells Leah that she never has sex with men who have tattoo. In her interview, Leah says she’s sure Sonja wouldn’t kick a young, hot guy out of bed for having an anchor tattoo.

Dorinda’s housekeeper Len helps her pack. Dorinda says, it’s a weird time for the Hamptons, since it’s hot/cold. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it’s good to hear that Ramona is going to be the lady of the manor, and overseeing the group. She hopes her bedroom is way upstairs, and Tinsley’s is way downstairs. I liked Dorinda in the beginning, but with each season, she works my last nerve harder.

In the Hamptons, LuAnn meets Ramona at a restaurant. While LuAnn waits at the table, Ramona stops by the bar to give a dude her phone number. In Ramona’s interview, she says she’s a born flirt. The day she doesn’t flirt, she’ll be dead. She tells LuAnn that she has a storyboard. She’d like to have a commitment, but not be married. LuAnn thinks she sounds like a serial killer. In LuAnn’s interview, she says she can’t imagine what’s on Ramona’s board. D*ck pics? LuAnn thinks the slumber party will be fun, and Ramona says she wants to bond. She has a room for LuAnn that has a separate bathroom. LuAnn says she doesn’t want to be favored. Like I believe that. In Ramona’s interview, she says she doesn’t want a repeat of the fish room, and we flash back to LuAnn’s tantrum. She tells LuAnn she made sure to give her a nice room where it’s quiet, so if Tinsley and Sonja are going crazy, she doesn’t have to hear it. She also invited Leah, and wants Dorinda to get to know her. LuAnn says she likes Leah. The first thing Leah told her is that she’d been arrested. Ramona asks, for what? and LuAnn says, assaulting a police officer; she was nineteen. Ramona says she’s sure that broke the ice and took down the barriers. In her interview, Ramona says, how many of them have gotten arrested? Of course they bonded. She’s hoping they can all come together as a group.

At Tinsley’s hotel apartment, she feeds Strawberry and Shortcake. She tells them, they were vegan at the shelter, but aren’t now. In her interview, she says she went to China to help with rescues, and had to come home with them. They speak Chinese, and she has to learn it to communicate with them. She uses a translator app to tell them, good girl. I understand this, since I once walked a dog who only understood Russian, and I had to learn several phrases.

Sonja picks up Dorinda, who’s bringing flowers and vibrators, but only three of the latter. I guess some of them will have to share? LuAnn tells housekeeper Alice that she’s headed to Ramona’s for the night. Alice asks, why? and LuAnn says, that’s a good question. Ramona prepares some food, and gives Coco a carrot. In her interview, she says Coco is all she’s got, and the dog is going deaf. This is probably a blessing for Coco. Or maybe she’s just faking Ramona out. Leah picks up Tinsley, who has some kind of throat issue, and can barely talk. Leah says Dorinda said some wild-ass sh*t about Tinsley at the party. In Leah’s interview, she says she survived an all-girls Catholic school on the Upper East Side. But this is on their turf, so she’s going to be on high alert. Tinsley croaks out that she’ll have to write things like, yeah, bitch.

In Dorinda’s interview, she says she didn’t give Leah a fair chance. Since she’s Tinsley’s friend, it’s harder not to be judgmental. There’s guilt by association. Sonja tells Ramona that Leah has tattoos everywhere. She has her name on her backside. Ramona says, this girl is gangster. Dorinda and Sonja get to Ramona’s place first, and Dorinda gifts Ramona with a frozé (frozen rosé) maker. In Ramona’s interview, she says, Dorinda gives good presents. Last year, she brought mermaid outfits; this year, a frozé machine. Dorinda says she’s excited about having a glass or nine of pinot. LuAnn arrives, and Coco pees on the hydrangeas. I’m not sure if that’s a statement.

Tinsley and Leah join the women. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, when it comes to Tinsley, it’s see no evil, hear no evil, but she can’t say speak no evil. Ramona tells Leah that she’s a guest, and has free access to everything if she’s at Ramona’s house, so make herself at home. Ramona shows LuAnn to her room, which is basically the entire finished basement. Ramona calls it the lower level, and in her interview, LuAnn says, that’s like putting her in the attic and calling it the penthouse. She’s always lowest on the totem pole when comes to rooms on vacations. The lack of consideration is mind blowing. Good Lord, it’s not that bad, and she has her own bathroom and a TV. She asks Ramona, what happened to the nicest room in the house? and Ramona tells her that she said LuAnn would have privacy. LuAnn wonders how to adjust the air conditioning, since she’s freezing, but Ramona says she can’t. She suggests a blanket, but LuAnn says she doesn’t want to sleep with air conditioning, and Ramona promises to figure it out. Ramona says she’s not surprised LuAnn and Leah bonded, since neither one of them drink, and they were both arrested. Lu Ann tries to work the TV remote in her basement private room.

On the phone, Dorinda deals with a contractor for Bluestone Manor. In her interview, she says the heating, electrical, and duct systems had to be ripped out. She’s overwhelmed, and still has to live her normal life. It seems like it never ends. Sonja asks Dorinda what’s going on, and Dorinda says she’s overwhelmed, and has to get her sh*t together. Sonja says Dorinda has a lot on her plate with the Berkshires house being flooded, and Dorinda says every day it’s another $15K. She doesn’t want to cry, but she’s doing everything, and none of it well. She wishes someone could step in and make it all better. Me too, Dorinda. me too. She says there’s nothing carefree about her anymore, and she’s not nice to anybody. Her mother said she’s wound too tight, and it’s not healthy. In her interview, Dorinda says she feels like she did after Richard died. She doesn’t know who to turn to. Sonja says, it doesn’t make John and less of a man, and Dorinda says, he’s just different. In her Dorinda’s interview, she says, John wants to be as helpful as he can, but he never had responsibilities like this. The only person she can discuss things with is herself. Sonja says Dorinda has too many balls in the air. How can she catch them all? In Sonja’s interview, she says, when Dorinda blows up, she can really rip you a new one, and she’s admitting it. LuAnn sits with them, and Dorinda says she’s having a cry. LuAnn asks, what’s the matter? and Sonja says Dorinda is spread too thin.

Leah gives Ramona a candle from Joe Malone, and Ramona loves it. She questions the sheer bucket hat Leah is wearing, as do I, although she’s surprisingly diplomatic, saying she doesn’t know if she could pull it off. She tells Leah that she was a buyer for Macy’s, and started her own company at thirty, after being on her own at sixteen. Leah says her parents threw her out at seventeen, but she deserved it. They told her to go figure herself out. She became rebellious when they moved from NYC to Connecticut when she was thirteen. She says, in hindsight, she learned perseverance, and how to deal with adversity. They join the others outside.

In Ramona’s interview, she says Leah is okay, but that hat, not so much. Leah doesn’t mind anyone criticizing her hat, as long as they don’t criticize her character. Ramona tells the women that they’re leaving for dinner at seven. She wonders how she can agree with a woman who has tattoo. In Leah’s interview, she says, it’s not like she has a penis tattooed across her forehead, or a gun tattooed on her neck. I’m kind of surprised that a bunch of New York City women are this weird about it myself. In Ramona’s interview, she says she doesn’t know what a tramp stamp is, but it doesn’t sound nice. Dorinda says if she forgets Leah’s name, she can just tell her to turn around. In her interview, Leah wonders if Dorinda ever leaves her 1% Upper East Side bubble. Dorinda says she needs a nap. When she leaves, Leah asks how Dorinda knew her name was on her back, and Sonja says she told her. Leah says she’s not having the comments. Get over it; everybody has tattoos nowadays. Sonja goes upstairs, and Ramona whines that no one is helping to clean up, so Leah and Tinsley do it, as Ramona sits with her bottle of vodka.

Leah calls her daughter, who’s had a bad first day of school. She says it’s not the same, and she hates everyone in her class. Leah tells her that she’ll have to make the best of it.  In her interview, Leah says she understands not fitting in. In school, she was the weird girl who lived downtown. That’s what she is again. She tells her daughter, it’s just the first day. See how it goes. Tinsley asks Sonja why she told Dorinda about Leah’s tramp stamp, and Sonja says she thought it was shocking and funny. Tinsley says, Dorinda is being mean, but Sonja says, Dorinda has a lot on her plate. She’s angry, and taking it out on people. Tinsley says Sonja can’t make excuses for her, but Sonja says, Dorinda is going through a rough time. Leah joins them, and says the only person making her uncomfortable is Dorinda. Sonja says, Dorinda is in a bad place, but Leah says she is too. She misses her kid, who had a bad day at school, and she’s dealing with sh*t too. In Sonja’s interview, she says she wants to be there for Dorinda. She’s in a tough place, and Sonja wants to protect her. Tinsley tells Leah to be careful talking about how she feels to Sonja, since she’ll run with it to Dorinda.

Ramona tells everyone to hurry up. Sonja relays Leah’s comments to Dorinda, and when they gather to leave, Dorinda tells Leah that she thought she was being funny. Leah says it’s her delivery, and she senses a lot of hostility. Dorinda informs her that none of them have a tattoo. In Dorinda’s interview, she says that her mother told her that people with tattoos were potential kidnappers, and she believed it. Um… my father got a tattoo in the Navy. What is wrong with these people? LuAnn joins them, and says she missed whatever was going on, and Sonja fills her in. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, good try, Sonja, but you’re not helping. Leah says she and Dorinda haven’t even talked, and Dorinda is making generalizations. Dorinda says she doesn’t know Leah, and Leah says she gets the feeling Dorinda doesn’t want to, but hopes she’s wrong. They get in the limo.

The women go to a restaurant in Sag Harbor. Sonja thinks Ramona should move to LA, since she can’t stop socializing. This is New York; act like a New Yorker. Leah orders a mocktail, and in LuAnn’s interview, she says it’s nice to have a wingman who’s confident to order a mocktail. It can be tough to be around the ladies while they’re drinking. Tinsley hopes a martini heals her voice. LuAnn makes a toast, saying this year was her roughest ever. It was like a volcano erupted, and the ashes came out. She was so busy taking care herself, she didn’t realize the ashes fell on them too. She didn’t know what to do, or how to react, and didn’t realize how much it weighed on them. It’s tough going through recovery, healing, and renewal, and she wants to make amends. She tells them how much she loves them, and says it hasn’t been easy. She thanks them, and in Sonja’s interview, she says, it’s the new and improved LuAnn. Something had to be said, since it was the elephant in the room. She’s glad LuAnn had respect enough for them to do it. They share an octopus dish, and I think about how I used to like octopus until I saw a diver playing with one, and it’s now off my things-to-eat list.

Ramona’s friend Lori calls her from inside the restaurant, and Ramona suggests she come over. Dorinda asks if Ramona is with them or elsewhere tonight. They were supposed to have dinner together, and she thinks Ramona is being rude, and should be present. LuAnn points out that Ramona’s chair is facing out, so she can look around. Ramona says it’s not like she’s an alcoholic; she just likes to be social. In her interview, she says how can she socialize too much? She’s a single woman, with no man. She needs to be social. Sonia reminds Ramona that she’d said she wanted younger friends. Dorinda says Sonja was stirring the pot this afternoon, and Sonja says Leah misunderstood her, and she wants to get to know Leah. Leah says next time, she’ll speak to Dorinda directly. In her interview, Leah says she’s not that offended. It’s not the worst thing anyone’s ever said to her, but she’s got her eye on Dorinda now. She tells them to enjoy her tramp stamp while they can, since it’s going to be gone soon, and Dorinda says, Sonja is the one who started talking about it. Sonja says that’s because she knows what it’s like to be a tramp. In Dorinda’s interview, she admits to making an unfair judgment about Leah. She holds her own, which Dorinda likes, tramp stamp and all. Ramona says she’s going to do a lap, and scope the room. In LuAnn’s interview, she thinks the whole town must have Ramona’s digits by now. Ramona is in costume; boobs out, going to war. Sonja says Ramona needs to lay up the shot, and LuAnn says, God help those men in there.

Next time, Dorinda says, only 24 hours and they got Leah to drink; Sonja says she was never a trophy wife; and LuAnn leaves Ramona’s.

👨🏽‍🍳 On Top Chef, Kelly Clarkson was introduced as guest judge. Everyone was thrilled, and she said she always gets worried about what the reaction will be when she’s a surprise. She gave the chefs a sneak peek at The Trolls World Tour, telling them the plot involves six Trolls heading musical genres, who all want to take over. The theme is inclusivity, and that everyone should be heard. She’s the voice of the head of the country Trolls. A table was set up with ingredients grouped by color, representing the six musical Troll worlds. For the Quickfire challenge, the chefs were to take an ingredient from each color, and make one cohesive dish. The winner would not only get immunity, but would also go to the red carpet premiere of the movie.

Gregory said he’d slayed the Quickfire challenges his last time around, but hadn’t gotten his momentum. Brian didn’t know what to do with the cotton candy he chose, and was eating it. When he tried to make ice cream, it exploded out of the machine. When the judges did their tasting, Padma asked if he meant for he ice cream to be curd-like, and he said that’s exactly what he was going for. No wonder his last name is Malarkey. Apparently, Gregory got his momentum, since he won for his shrimp dish. He said he was going to be taking Nini, since she’d let him use her can opener.

For the elimination challenge, the chefs would be shopping at the Santa Monica farmer’s market, where there are over 75 organic farmers selling produce. They would be split into two teams of six, and make a six-course progressive menu, each being responsible for one course, including dessert. They were being given $1200 and 45 minutes to shop, but wouldn’t know what they’d have to work with until they got to the market. Their entire menu also had to be vegetarian, and they’d be serving 40 diners at Jeremy Fox’s restaurant Birdie Gs. They were reminded that Jeremy literally wrote the book on vegetables.

A basket of trolls, courtesy of Kelly, waited for them at the house. Melissa thought it would be a challenge to be flexible, and that communication and being able to pivot were key. The market was very impressive, and while the chefs didn’t seem to have a hard time deciding what to make, there were a few monkey wrenches along the way, like Jennifer burning her cashew butter, and Lisa discovering her Brussels sprouts were inconsistently cooked.

Padma said the blue team was clearly the winner with progression, and Tom thought everything was solid all the way through. The plating was beautiful, and the menu well-executed. Melissa was the winner within the winners, and said in her interview that she was there to show she was a force to be reckoned with. The red team didn’t fare so well, the judges finding the first two courses being too raw. Brian’s mozzarella and tomato dish was something they’d felt had been seen before, and he and Leeann played the blame game over Lee Anne’s dish, as Brian had helped plate it. Lisa’s Brussels sprouts weren’t well-received either, but she tried to justify them by saying her cooking was more rustic. Tom said she could still be true to herself, yet be thoughtful and complex. He said it all depended on how far they were willing to push themselves, and they didn’t want to walk out second guessing what they’d done. In the end, Lisa packed her knives and went to Last Chance Kitchen. She said it sucked, since she had made the finale in her season, and it was something she hadn’t heard before. This was a whole other level of chefs, and hadn’t been easy.

Next time, the chefs’ loved ones join them, and they’re going to be responsible for creating their own product, which their guests will test. It also looks like an ambulance has to be called for Lee Anne’s mom.

🌈 Connecting…

Hope all is well, and you’re being productive. Or at least catching up on your TV watching. Stay safe, and see you on Sunset tomorrow.

April 2, 2020 – Doc Visits Cyrus, Soap Changes, NYC Minus Bethenny, Artistic Chefs, Chef Quote, Juicy Joe Passes the Time, Cabaret Drama & Almost Two


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

I’ve consistently missed the beginning of the show every day this week, so why end the week any differently? <sigh> Sonny is taking Mike for a walk in the hallway, Molly has shown up to confront Jordan about TJ, and Doc pays Cyrus a visit.

On the phone Robert says, there’s nothing to be happy about, but the law doesn’t give them many choices. Laura says, that didn’t sound good, and he says, the information is going to be sent to Cyrus’s lawyers, who will ask for a writ of habeas corpus. Then a judge will look at it, and Cyrus walks. Laura says, that’s completely unacceptable. She won’t have that monster roaming free on the streets of Port Charles. He asks how she plans to stop him, and she says, watch her.

Sonny tells Mike, he’s got him, and Carly says they can come back. Brando says he just wanted to thank Mike for the summer at the track. He was ten years old, and obsessed with horses. Mike told him it ran in the family. Carly says, that sounds like Mike, and Mike says, Brando. Glady’s son. He remembers. Is Brando passing through? Carly says, Sonny is helping Brando open a garage in Port Charles. Mike says, good, and Sonny says, Brando is a nice guy. Brando says it was nice of Mike, and Mike says he appreciates him stopping by. He’s a little tired, so can Brando come by again some other time? Brando says he’d like that, and Carly tells Mike to get some rest. They’ll be there. Sonny walks Mike back to his room, and says it was a nice surprise visit. Mike says he doesn’t know Brando.

Curtis gets that Molly is upset, but it’s out of their hands. It’s time to accept it’s out of hers. TJ is a grown man, and taking time for himself. If the situations were reversed, TJ would respect her privacy. Molly says she’d make sure someone got a message to TJ, and not completely shut him out. Curtis says they don’t like how TJ is handling it, but it’s time they were all patient. She says she’s done being patient. TJ completely ghosted her, and is ignoring her texts and calls. She knows he’s disappointed, but this is vindictive and mean. Jordan says they don’t know where he is, and Molly says TJ is responding to Jordan, and asks if she’ll give him a message. She’s tired of the cold shoulder. They’re better than this, and they need to talk. Jordan says she’ll give TJ a message, but can’t guarantee when he’ll get back to Molly. Molly says Jordan knows how much she loves TJ, and Jordan says, she does, but right now, love isn’t enough. Molly says she’ll give TJ 24 hours, and then she’ll start a search herself. She’ll get Sam and Spinelli to help, and she’ll take out an ad in The Invader; have you seen this man? Jordan tells her to stop acting like a child.

On the phone, Laura tells someone she wants it as soon as possible. Robert asks if she’s going to keep him in suspense, or tell him. She says she’ll tell him when the time is right, and he says he hates being blindsided. She says Mac is out following leads on the warehouse and waterfront shootings, hoping they find something that ties it into Cyrus. Robert says, it’s more likely they won’t be able to, and Laura saysm the goal is to keep Cyrus locked up long enough to find evidence to make the charges stick. He says, suppose she succeeds? They know Cyrus can run his operation from behind bars. Laura says she told him that she wants to keep Cyrus locked up, but not in Pentenville.

Cyrus says, they brought in a shrink to get inside his head? Let him help Doc. No, he didn’t like to pull the wings off of flies. Doc says, but he did it anyway? Cyrus says they both know that’s not what he means, and Doc asks, what does he mean? Cyrus asks if this is how it’s going to go, and Doc says Cyrus’s first impulse was to insist he didn’t do something he thought Doc might ask about. Why that specific question? Cyrus says it’s what people like him ask, and Doc says, people like him; psychiatrists? Cyrus says, no, Methodists. I see we have another comedian behind bars. Doc says he’s interviewed many criminals like Cyrus, and Cyrus says, everyone wants to see what makes him tick. Why is that? Doc says he read Cyrus’s file. Cyrus says, and Doc has a fascination with him. Doc says, not necessarily fascination, and Cyrus says, but at least a healthy interest. He’s sure Doc has somewhere else he could be, but here he is. Doc says Cyrus’s second assessment was correct; an interest, not a fascination. Doc says he’s interviewed a lot like of men like Cyrus, and Cyrus says, but Doc has never met anyone like him.

Sam tells Jason that Spinelli followed Delores to her rendezvous. She’s having an affair with a councilmen, but they caught Spinelli taking pictures. Jason asks if it was in a hotel or motel, and Sam says, in the back of her car. Not the most discreet, but Delores threatened to arrest and charge Spinelli if he didn’t keep her secret. This also made it worse for Sam. Now Delores is determined to find something that will get her ass thrown back Pentenville. Jason says it’s time to stop looking for a way out; she was lucky she wasn’t thrown back in. She says her mom said the same thing, and he says she’s got to listen. If she thinks waiting is bad, it will be worse if she has to finish the rest of her sentence back in prison. Sam says they won’t see each other for a year and half. Is that what he wants? He says, no, but that’s what has to happen to keep her out of prison.

Mike tells Sonny, they’re trying to get one over on him, pretending they’re family. He needs Sonny to do something. Tell his boss that he needs to have security keep an eye on those two. Whoever they are, they’re up to no good.

Brando asks Carly if Mike is always like that, and she says, pretty much. She’s glad Mike recognized him, and he says, him too. That summer at the track is a good memory. She says, as Mike slips away, it’s important to remember the man he was. He says, Sonny is patient with him, and seems devoted. She says, when Mike was first diagnosed, Sonny worried that he couldn’t handle it, and couldn’t do what Mike needed. She never had any doubt. Family is everything to Sonny.

Molly says, it’s not being childish to want answers, but Jordan say she’s behaving like brat. Because TJ isn’t talking to her, she wants to call TV stations. She needs to get over it. She doesn’t want to see that her actions have consequences. She broke TJ’s heart, and he doesn’t want to be with her.

Doc tells Cyrus, that’s an intriguing statement. Does Cyrus think he’s more dangerous than other prisoners? Cyrus asks if that’s what Doc would like him to think, and Doc says he wants to know what Cyrus thinks. Is he more dangerous, or more of a threat? Cyrus tells Doc, he said he was more interesting, and Doc says, so he’s not dangerous? Cyrus says, he didn’t say that. Doc writes something, and Cyrus asks if Doc thinks he’s got him figured out. Doc says he’s documenting Cyrus’s veiled threat. When he asked if Cyrus was more dangerous, he refused to confirm it. Cyrus says, Doc thinks that’s a threat? and Doc says, a veiled one. It’s like when someone says, nice car. It would be a shame if something happened to it. Cyrus says, if he threatens Doc, he’ll know it. Cyrus wonders if he can ask Doc a question, and Doc says, of course (🍷); ask away. He asks if Doc could be perceiving an innocuous statement as a threat because of a manifestation of his own insecurities. Doc says, touché. He bets Cyrus is an excellent chess player. Cyrus says he never loses. Doc says, it’s been insightful, and thanks him. Cyrus says Doc never told him why he’s there. Doc says he’s doing a study about men behind bars, specifically solitary confinement. He’s been speaking to a lot prisoners. Cyrus has been helpful. Cyrus says, Doc’s name is Collins? Doc says, it’s a common name, but Cyrus probably recognizes it because his wife is the mayor. Cyrus says, Laura. She’s the reason he’s in solitary. Doc says, is she? Cyrus says, be sure to send his regards, and Doc leaves.

Trina tells Ava, after her dad died, Jordan went back over the files, and says her dad faked evidence. She told the Justice Department, and they’re going to let Cyrus out of prison. Ava says, that’s unlikely; it would be a major reversal. Trina says she doesn’t know the legal term, but her father is dead, and Cyrus is going to be out. How is that justice? The media is going to trash her dad, when he’s not a bad cop. Her father was a good man. Ava says she didn’t have a chance to know him, but from what Trina has said, she bets there’s only one person whose opinion mattered to him – Trina’s.

Jason takes Sam’s hands. He says it doesn’t matter how much they hate this. What’s important is she’s free, and home safe with the kids. She says, of course (🍷) it’s important, but so is finding a way to be together. He asks if it’s worth the risk? Her chance of going back to prison is worse than ever, especially now. She asks, what’s going on? and he says, Cyrus is attacking Sonny on all fronts. Out here, he can make sure she’s protected, but if she goes back, she’ll be in the middle of a war zone. Is Pentenville a co-ed prison?

Sam says she thought Sonny was handling Cyrus, and Jason says he’s working on it. It’s tough. Cyrus is powerful, and has a lot of people. Sam asks what that means, and he says, Sonny and Cyrus handle things differently. There are things Sonny won’t do that cross the line, and there’s no line Cyrus won’t cross. No one is off limits. Sam says she knows. He kidnapped Cameron and Trina, and used them as leverage. He says, they weren’t the only ones. Cyrus has TJ Ashford.  

Brando tells Carly, he mostly focused on the horses, but he got the impression that Mike and Sonny weren’t close. Mike was sorry for that. Carly says, if Mike hadn’t gotten sick, Sonny would have been okay with the distance. They both would have, but with Alzheimer’s, the distance isn’t up to them. You have to fight for every single moment. Brando says he doesn’t think he could do it, and Carly prays he never had to find out what it’s like. Sonny wanted to make peace with Mike before he slips away. Brando says, as much as he wasn’t happy at first about them keeping him there, he has to admit, it’s been good to connect with family. Carly says they enjoy having him there, even though they’re taking time to get to know him. Brando needs to get back to the shop, and Carly says she’s good. He leaves, and someone with very LOUD shoes goes by. Sonny comes back, and says he just left his dad. Mike doesn’t know who Brando is.

Ava tells Trina, nothing and no one can tarnish the love her father had for her. He’s her hero, and that’s all that matters. In a way, Taggert is Ava’s hero too. Trina says Ava didn’t know him, but Ava says she knows Trina. Her father saved her. He put his love for her above everything else, even his own life. That’s the true test of a hero and parent, putting everything aside for their child. Trina wishes there had been some other way, and Ava says she knows how important it is for Trina to keep her father on a pedestal. Trina says she didn’t put him there; it’s just where he always was. He was always a hero to her.

Molly tells Jordan, her not wanting to get married to anyone has nothing to do with how much she loves TJ. Jordan says, maybe not, but TJ gave her his heart and life, and she threw it back in his face. He got the message. She made a choice that served her, and didn’t care about TJ’s feelings. Molly says, that’s not true, and Jordan says Molly could have fooled her. Molly says Jordan made her point, and Jordan says, has she? Before Molly launches a search, remember TJ didn’t leave; she pushed him away. Molly says she’s got it. She never expected to break up with TJ, and she sure didn’t expect him do it through his mother. She leaves, and Jordan leans against the door. She tells Curtis, she had to do it. She had to stop Molly from searching. Curtis says, it will be okay, and she says she prays it worked.

Sonny tells Carly, his dad was scared. He thought Brando was going to hurt him. He wants Sonny to tell his bosses to beef up security. Carly says she’s so sorry, and Sonny says he’s got to go tell his dad that his boss is getting more men. He laughs, and she asks if there’s anything she can do to help? He says she’s done a lot already, and thanks her.

There’s a knock at the garage door, and Brando opens it to Molly. He says they’re closed, and she says, of course (🍷). It’s that kind of day. She guesses she’ll have to call a tow. She drives a hybrid, since it’s better for the environment. He asks what she hit, and she says, nothing; she went over a curb. The undercarriage is making a grating noise, and she doesn’t want to wreck the engine. He asks if there was any chance she was drinking, and she says she wishes; she’s totally sober. He asks if any other cars were involved, and if she needs the police, but she says it was just her. Sorry to bother him. She should have called a tow to begin with since the garage was closed. He says, on second thought, he’ll check it out.

Laura asks how it went, and Doc tells her, as expected. Cyrus is a narcissist. He made a subtle, veiled threat when his pride was hurt. He took exception to Doc minimizing how dangerous he was. She asks if they can lock him up, and Doc says, he’s sane. Under ordinary circumstances, he’d be opposed to that, but he has no problem recommending that he be moved to a psychological facility under medical supervision. Robert comes in and asks if that’s the plan. Laura asks how much he heard, and he says, enough to know it’s not going to work. Laura says she can have Cyrus transferred to Ferncliff, and Robert asks, for how long? She says they can keep him long enough for an extensive evaluation. Long enough to come up with a fresh case against him. Robert says Cyrus’s lawyers are going to take one look, and see it’s a ploy to keep Cyrus behind bars. Laura says she’ll argue that she wants him to get the care he needs. Robert says, and Doc will argue that it’s in his best interest. Doc says, exactly, and Laura says she’s not above doing what she has to, to keep Cyrus off the street, including having him committed. Robert says, it’s not going to work.

Mike recognizes Sonny, and asks, what took so long? Sonny apologizes, and Mike says, it’s all right; Sonny is there now. He hates hospitals. Can Sonny get him out? He just wants to go home. Sonny says, as soon as the doctors say it’s okay, he’ll take Mike back to Turning Woods. He remembers Turning Woods, right? Mike says, it’s a great place, but after that they get to go home, right? He doesn’t want to be around these people anymore; it doesn’t feel right. Sonny tells him to rest, and Mike says he’s tired. Sonny says, take a break. Close his eyes, and don’t worry. They’ll be waiting. Mike takes Sonny’s hands, and says, everything is going be all right. Sonny will see when they get back Bensonhurst; it will be all right. Mike lies down, closes his eyes, and drifts off.

Sonny goes back out, and Carly asks how Mike is doing. Sonny doesn’t know, and tells her to go home; he’s got to stay tonight. She says she knows how hard it is when Mike doesn’t recognize him, but Sonny says, he did. He knew Sonny’s name, the whole thing; he was great. Sonny sits down, and says, his dad wanted him to take him back to Bensonhurst. He looked Sonny in the eye, and he hasn’t done that in days. He said all he wants to do is go home.

Brando tells Molly, it’s not bad. It just needs some front end work. She asks if she should take it to the dealership, and he says, it’s up to her. She says he was nice enough to take a look, and she’d rather give him the business, assuming he can do the repair. He says, sure, and she says he doesn’t sound enthusiastic. He says he’s happy for the business, but she didn’t chose to come there, and he wasn’t recommend. She came out of desperation, and he doesn’t want to take advantage of that.

Ava says, any time Trina wants to talk, or even if she doesn’t, she’s available. Right now though, she’d like Trina to do something for her. Trina says, name it, and Ava says, call her mother. Let her know she’s safe. Ava knows what it’s like to worry about a daughter, no matter how angry she is. Trina takes out her phone, and calls. Ava gives her privacy.

Curtis tells Jordan, Molly will get over it, but Jordan says she can’t get over the look on Molly’s face. He says, when this is over, Molly will know Jordan was trying to protect her, and understand that Jordan loves her. She says here’s hoping it worked. Not just for Molly. Everyone needs to believe TJ is just dealing with rejection and disappeared. Curtis says, it makes sense, and she says she has to break Molly’s heart and destroy the reputations of the finest agents she’s ever met to make sure Cyrus and his drug dealing are off the streets.

Brando tells Molly, there’s no website yet; he just opened. She asks if it was a surprise, and he says he didn’t plan on opening a garage, not in Port Charles anyway. Long story. She says she loves them; the more convoluted, the better. He asks if she’s a novelist, and she says she’s a published author. She was sixteen at the time. He says, that’s even more impressive, and she says, it was a romance novel. Looking back, it was arrogant to think she could write about life and love, when she knew nothing. He asks if she still writes, but she says, not any more. Now she’s a law student. He says, so if she doesn’t like the repair, she’ll sue him. She asks if he can repair it, and he says he can. She says, at a fair price? and he says, absolutely. She says she’ll have no grounds. He says not to act grateful yet. He hasn’t drawn up the estimate. She says, it’s the perfect rotten end of a perfectly rotten day.

Trina tells Ava, her mom was glad she checked in, and Ava says she’s sure Portia would like to keep Trina at home, and not let Trina out of her sight. Trina says, normally, she’d hate that, but now, it’s not so bad. All of it is going to be coming out; the evidence her dad supposedly planted. It will be all over the news, and his name will be dirt. She’ll be the only one who remembers what a good man he was. Ava says, even if everyone loses faith, Trina won’t, and she’s the only person who matters. Trina says, it doesn’t feel like enough, and Ava says, she is; she was for him. Her father left behind an incredible legacy. Not just with his work as a cop, but with the way Trina saw him walk through the world. He shaped her, and she’s extraordinary. Trina is his legacy. They hug.

Curtis promises it will end, and Jordan will take Cyrus out. She wonders what’s taking so long. They have everything they need for Cyrus to vacate. He says she knows how it goes. They have to get the order in front of a judge. She says, and once they do, the most evil man she’s ever known is going to go free.

Laura asks if Robert is suggesting they just sit back and let Cyrus go free. He says the justice system isn’t perfect, but they can’t disrespect it. Doc says, not even if it was a random drug lord, whose body count was strangers? It’s a legitimate course of action. Robert says, it’s nothing to be happy about, but they have to get used to the fact Cyrus is getting out. And when he does, Laura will be in his crosshairs for what she did to him in Pentenville. Laura says she’s not worried about herself, but her city. Port Charles is going to see a spike in drug trafficking. She asks if there’s any other option to delay Cyrus’s release.

Sonny tells Carly, he thought watching his father fade away  would be the hardest part. His father knowing him, looking him in the eye, father to son, and pleading that all he wants  to do is go home; it’s the one thing Sonny can’t give him. This is hell. He can’t do it. Carly holds him, and says, yes, he can. She’s got him.

On Monday – tomorrow they’ll be airing their 56th Anniversary episode (originally aired on April 3rd, 2019) – Josslyn wants to find Trina, Jason tells Sam that he can’t do this anymore, and Carly asks Sonny what the hell he’s going to do.

🩹 The Hospital Skinny…

More on what’s to come for GH’s schedule.

The Real Housewives of New York City

We begin with the news of Bethenny’s exit, and how the cast found out, since apparently, Bethenny didn’t let anyone know. She could be caustic, but she was also intelligent, funny, and knew her way around a kitchen. And most important, every once in a while, blew her stack and said what was on all our minds. Life. Is. Not. A. Cabaret. Sonja feels abandoned all over again, and Ramona thinks it will be better; the women will be freer in spirit. In LeeAnn’s interview, a producer asks how she feels. LuAnn says, it’s hard to say. She’ll miss Bethenny, but the show must go on – without her.

LuAnn leaves the criminal court building, accompanied by Sonja. They hug on the steps, and LuAnn says, it’s finally over. She stops by a coffee cart on the corner, telling Sonja it’s her coffee guy. He says he thought she was finished, and in her interview, she says, it’s finally over; her probation is finished. It’s been almost two years. We flash back to LuAnn looking sad in court, and explaining to the others that she had to use a breathalyzer to drive. She says what people don’t understand is that she wasn’t fully present. This was always on her mind. It’s like someone lifted a ton of bricks. They sit and chat, and Sonja says, when LuAnn was first arrested, she didn’t care. She hit bottom, and thought things were great. Then she started becoming a cabaret star, and she wasn’t there for them. LuAnn says, what about her? Ugh. Same old. Sonja says she treated them like fans. In Sonja’s interview, she lists some of the ways LuAnn was a brat last season. The tantrum in the fish room, dumping Sonja after the AA meeting to go see her own poster, and coming back without truffle fries. That’s the real misdemeanor. LuAnn didn’t understand Sonja’s pain. As they hug, Sonja eats a pretzel behind LuAnn’s back.

Tinsley meets friend, and new cast member, Leah at the gym. In Tinsley’s interview, she says the summer was all about her. She moved on from Scott, worked on her lash line, and went to China, bringing back two puppies, Strawberry and Shortcake. She’s been focusing on herself, and it feels liberating. She met Leah a couple months ago, and Leah brings out her wilder side. She says what she feels, and has no filter. She also has a twelve-year-old daughter. Tinsley takes her hoops off, saying she feels like she’s losing  part of herself. Boxing trainer Martin says, nobody gives a f***. After the session, Tinsley and Leah sit and talk. Tinsley tells Leah that she only knew Chicago through Scott, but met Bruce while she was there. She doesn’t like his name, but she can’t change it. He’s been married twice and has three kids. In her interview, Tinsley thinks it’s the best way to have children; she can give them back. She tells Leah, she’s usually all-in immediately, but it’s the first time she’s being guarded, and not thinking too far ahead. Leah says she’s enjoying being single. She and her last boyfriend went to France, and on the flight home she asked what was going on with his divorce. He said it was on hold, so she told him that her p*ssy was on hold too. Ha! Good one.

Dorinda is still with John, and she’s prepping for his cooking class – i.e. her teaching him how to make lasagna. She tells him the doctor says she’s healing like a twenty-year-old, and he says she still acts like a twenty-year-old. In her interview, Dorinda says Carson Kressley was teaching her some Dancing with the Stars moves at a dinner party, flung her over a balcony, and she broke a rib. There was no mention as to whether alcohol was involved. She tells John, it forced her to look at things, and become dependent on him. In Dorinda’s interview, she says her injury made it necessary for her and John to spend time together. It’s been good, but weird; she’s not used to it. She confirms that familiarity breeds contempt.  They make lasagna, and Dorinda tells him about LuAnn. She doesn’t know why it’s a big deal. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she and LuAnn are in a good place, but their friendship had gone off the tracks. We flash back to mostly Dorinda being mean to LuAnn, and yelling, Jovani! during LuAnn’s cabaret show. She says, they’ve both transitioned to better places, and she’s not overthinking it.

Ramona meets friends Maria, Missy and Elyse, along with new neighbor/friend Mitchell, at a bar. In Ramona’s interview, she says she had a fabulous summer. She sold her condo, and has a new apartment on the Upper East Side, but she was living the Hamptons life. She admits she’s been escaping; masking something in her mind. She tells her friends that she feels like a youngster, but she’s sixty, and lacks direction. She feels empty and alone. In her interview, she says she has no important man in her life. Elyse says she’s surprised that Ramona feels that way, and Ramona starts to cry. Oh, yay. The bar buddy everyone wants. A weepy one. She says she wants a man to hold her, love her, and marry her, and doesn’t know if she’ll find one. I should add, an embarrassing bar buddy as well, since she’s LOUD.

Leah and daughter Kier go out to a juice bar. In her interview, Leah says, New York City is the best city in the world, and I tend to agree. She has a clothing line, Married to the Mob (which I’m actually familiar with), and lives with her daughter. They’re best friends, soulmates, and life partners. She doesn’t know if that’s healthy, but it’s the way it is. Kier is starting school soon, and Leah tells her to be herself, try her best, and don’t let the bitches get to her. Kier says her grandma told her that Leah was a horrible child. In Leah’s interview, she says their family situation isn’t traditional. Her baby daddy was her first love, and she thought they’d be together until they died, but they haven’t been together since Kier was two. Even so, he’s pretty much family.

Ramona visits Sonja, along with her pup Coco, who wants to romance Sonja’s pup Marley, even though there’s nothing they can ultimately do about it, since they’re fixed. Sonja says she’s been a recluse and has gas. Ramon tells Sonja not to send any of that her way. Sonja says she just took her daughter to college, and she lost it. In Sonja’s interview, she says when her daughter was in boarding school, she came home on weekends with her friends. The best Sonja can do now is be supportive about college, but she’s dying inside. Ramona says, when kids are away, they appreciate you more, and Sonja says she wants to give her daughter space. Sonja says, when she went to college, she flew the coop, and never looked back. The dogs continue to go at it.

Dorinda prepares for a party on the rooftop of Magic Hour restaurant. In her interview, she says she’s the entertainer of the group. You never know what you’ll get with Sonja, Ramona always invites the same thirty people, LuAnn’s parties always have a ticket booth out front, and who would Tinsley invite? Scott? We flash back to Dorinda calling Tinsley out on Scott and living in the hotel. Dorinda tells her makeup artist, Tinsley gave her a speech on how she didn’t want to hear conspiracy theories about her life, but she tells it like she sees it.

Tinsley tells her hair stylist that she’s anxious because she’s about to see the girls. The accusations about her and Scott are bullsh*t. We flash back to a Scott moment. In Tinsley’s interview, she wishes she understood why Dorinda is focused on her. Clearly something is going on in her own life that’s making her unhappy, so she’s projecting. Dorinda says she doesn’t know anything about Tinsley. The minute they go deep, Tinsley retracts like a turtle. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she doesn’t know if Tinsley has the ability to open up, but they’re not cocktail party talkers; they’re bad bitches.

Tinsley brings Leah to Dorinda’s party, and Leah wonders if there are any eligible bachelors to pick up. In her interview, Dorinda says she’s good at parties. She brings people from all different places and professions, and throws them into a room like a crazy soup, then puts the heat on high. Tinsley refuses to clink glasses because Sonja and Leah aren’t drinking alcohol, and it’s bad luck. I think that applies only to water, but Tinsley lives in her own world. She puts a drink stirrer in her drink, and then sticks it in theirs to make it okay. New rule. In Leah’s interview, she says she and alcohol have a weird relationship. She didn’t drink for nine years, and then started again six months ago. She enjoys going crazy. We see a clip of her telling Tinsley that every twenty times, she’s a hot mess and takes a loser home, wondering how he got there the next morning. The other night she drank too much, and lost Chanel bag along with her passport, so she’s putting it on pause. Everyone comments on Dorinda’s fabulous new haircut, which really does flatter her. LuAnn says she has her life back. In her interview, LuAnn says, it’s hard to wrap her head around the fact she could have gone to jail for having a drink, and now she can do what she wants. She worked hard to get where she is, and doesn’t want to give it up. She’s Lu and improved. Tinsley introduces Leah to everyone.

Dorinda welcomes everyone. She says, another summer is over, and she wanted to have an end-of-the-summer party, since they scatter during the summer. She tells them that she has a big surprise, and drag queen Chelsea Piers comes out (no pun intended), and performs Feelin’ Jovani, while LuAnn fights for the spotlight. In LuAnn’s interview, she says obviously Dorinda has gotten past this. It’s not an olive branch; it’s the whole tree. In Leah’s interview, she says she has no clue what Jovani is, and looks it up on her phone, looking confused when she finds out it’s a clothing designer. I guess she’s never watched this show. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, she loves hard, fights hard, and forgives easily. It seems ridiculous now. Leah explains she’s a native New Yorker, and LuAnn says, but she looks so normal. Leah says she doesn’t see herself tied down, but Ramona says she wants to be tied down. (Leaving those jokes for someone else.) LuAnn tells Leah, they’re kind of old school, since they were both married a long time. Leah and LuAnn compare arrests, and oddly enough, both attacked police officers. In Leah’s interview, she says she ran into a guy she had a crush on 4th of July, 2002. She was mid-kiss when suddenly five cops were beating him up. Her kneejerk reaction was to hit a cop, and he punched her, then smashed her face into the subway grate. Nice. She sued and won, and decided she’d been making bad choices, so she’d be smart with the money, and used it for her brand.

Tinsley asks Dorinda to come outside and talk. They sit, and Tinsley says she feels like they were friends, but had issues, and she wants to have a lunch date where they can talk. Dorinda says, about Tinsley’s text on conspiracy theories, she’s always trying to pull information out of Tinsley. She saw Tinsley in January, when she’d said she wasn’t with Scott, and a week later, she was having dinner with him. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it’s about transparency. Tinsley has things going on, and they find out about them elsewhere. She thinks Tinsley is a riddle they’re never going to solve. She doesn’t know the answer. Tinsley wins. Inside, Sonja chats up hot guy William, who’s Ramona’s ex-lover. Sonja says Ramona is always going after her guys, so she’s turning the tables. She tells William that she’s not dating young guys, but if you don’t use it, you lose it. Leah doesn’t think he can handle Sonja. In her interview, Leah feels like William is the kind of guy who wouldn’t know his way around a woman’s body, rub you in the wrong place, and you’d have to explain it to him or he’ll just keep it up. Sonja says she doesn’t want to go home empty-handed. Wake up and smell the Sonja. Dorinda tells Tinsley, it’s not just her, but Tinsley says, actually, it is. Dorinda won’t listen to her, and keeps calling her a liar. Dorinda says, don’t put words in her mouth.

Dorinda tells Tinsley not to be tricky with her. Don’t ride up on her and make a statement. I have no idea what that means. Tinsley says she doesn’t give a sh*t, and what she thinks is that Dorinda doesn’t want to be her friend. Dorinda says she wants to know who Tinsley is, but Tinsley just wants to make a big statement, and it’s not going to work. Dorinda flounces off, and plops down next to LuAnn on a couch. She tells LuAnn that Tinsley came up on her hot, and told Dorinda not to be all gangster, but Dorinda said she is gangster. I think maybe she’s just mean. Tinsley said everybody knows her except Dorinda. Tinsley sits down in between Ramona and Leah, and says she only said she wanted to talk to Dorinda, and Dorinda said she was fake. In Tinsley’s interview, she says if she’s not talking, Dorinda says she’s hiding something, but if she asks for a private conversation, she’s fake. She can’t win. Leah asks, what’s going on? and Dorinda and Tinsley continue to bicker. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, she’s already been there, and the last thing she’s doing is inserting herself into this dog fight. She tries to switch seats with Tinsley, but Tinsley isn’t moving. Dorinda gets in Tinsley’s face, and tells her to shut her mouth. Leah asks if Tinsley is going to let Dorinda talk to her like that. Tinsley says she doesn’t care what Dorinda has to say, and Dorinda says, kindergarten is starting. In Leah’s interview, she says, Dorinda is like the snake in Beetlejuice, but scarier and meaner. Dorinda says this is boring her, and starts to walk away, but her heel gets stuck. Tinsley says, don’t trip (totally missing the opportunity to say, have a nice trip; see you next fall). Dorinda gets up close and personal again, and says her heel got stuck. The difference is, she bought her shoes. She didn’t lie on her back for them. She twirls around, but not nearly as well as Kenya, and walks away. Tinsley says, you’re a jealous bitch, bitch.

And away we go.

This season – parties, costumes, Ramona on a swing, Sonja falling, Leah says they’re all hot effing messes, LuAnn is back at cabaret, Tinsley wants to move to Chicago, Dorinda pretends everything is okay, LuAnn forgot how good vodka tastes, a trip to Mexico, a trip to a cornfield, revisiting the fish room, LuAnn swears she never screwed the pirate, and Dale wonders what’s wrong with her and Tinsley?

👨🏽‍🍳 On Top Chef, comedian chefs Ali Wong and Randall Park, who met during a fried rice competition where they went to school, gave the chefs their quickfire challenge of creating a fried rice dish, the winning chef getting immunity. The chefs had thirty minutes to make the best damn fried rice that was creative and inventive. Given a display table of ingredients, they were also to use at least one ingredient from the choices. You’d have thought they were going for rolls of toilet paper, the way the chefs grabbed the components they wanted. Kevin was the winner, using flaming hot Cheetos, hot dogs, and bourbon. I assume it tasted better than it sounds, since Ali said it was like a party in her mouth.

The elimination challenge was next, with the chefs going to the Getty Museum for inspiration. The challenge was to interpret a work of art on a plate, using four movements; baroque, neoclassicism, renaissance, and rococo. Since Kevin won the Quickfire, he got to choose first, and selected baroque. The rest of the contestants took knives from a block, each with a movement on it. After the museum, it was on to Whole Foods to shop for ingredients. Someone pointed out LOUD shoes, and I had to laugh, since I’d just mentioned that in the GH recap, and I wonder if it’s a thing now. The chefs were to tell a story through their choice of ingredient, and Ludo Lefebvre was introduced as guest judge.

Padma said they had some glorious, artful food, but had to choose one masterpiece. The winning spot went to Melissa’s won ton soup.

When the chefs on the bottom were called out, Padma told Karen that she ended up in the bottom because Kevin had immunity. In her interview, Karen made it clear how pissed she would be if she was out for that reason. She creeped me out a little during this episode. Not only did she practically hiss her displeasure about possibly losing, she most definitely glared at Kevin when he got the immunity in the first place. I also highly doubt had he not had it, he would have taken any chances. Joe said while the dish chosen didn’t lack artistry, it lacked the technique to present the artistry. Jamie had to pack up his knives and go for his dish being too dry. He said it sucked to leave this early, and wished he had delivered better cookery; there was no greater sin. His hope was in the Last Chance Kitchen, and to get back in the competition, doing the type of food he wants, the way he wants to do it. Next time, Kelly Clarkson is guest judge, and the chefs are challenged with a vegetarian menu.

🥠 The best quote came from Brian: I am not making baby Jesus today.

🐐 On Watch What Happens Live, we learned from Melissa and Joe Gorga that during quarantine in Italy, Joe Giudice is picking broccoli and chasing goats. Alrighty then.

👠 Don’t Pandemic Me…

One of LuAnn’s employees passive/aggressively called her out on Instagram.

But she’s not having it during this crisis.

👩🏽‍🚀 Almost Two Weeks In…

The good news is, chickens are still laying eggs, and the sky hasn’t fallen… yet. Shah you tomorrow.

March 26, 2020 – Nelle Refuses To Sign, Chefs Inspired By Gold, Farewell Chef Floyd, Strange Eatery, New Listing, Get Well Andy, Ramona Stays In, a Crossover & Don’t Say It


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

I missed the first minute or so. Because I had extra time. Why that always happens, I have no clue.

Michael tells Nelle, he had the same condition as Wiley when he was a baby, and the same surgery. Nelle says the last time she checked, he wasn’t Wiley. Doesn’t elective mean he doesn’t need it? Monica says, it doesn’t mean it’s frivolous, and Michael says, Wiley will have a better quality of life. How can Nelle possibly object?

Laura visits Sonny, who asks if she wants coffee, while we’re totally distracted by the moss centerpiece. She says she wishes it was only a social visit, and he asks if he’s talking to the mayor, or is his friend in there? She thinks she can be both. As mayor, she’s there to ask for help; as a friend, she hopes he says yes. He asks what he can do for her, and she says, a new wave of drugs has hit the streets. He says she knows that’s not his business. He has nothing to do with that. She says, but he knows how it happened, doesn’t he?

At Rice Plaza, Chase tells Willow that he forgot his skates in the car. She says, it’s lucky Sasha, Michael, and Wiley aren’t there yet, and he leaves to get them. Willow leaves a message for Sasha, saying she hopes they’re still coming, and to call her back. Jason approaches her, and says he’s glad he ran into her. She says she is too. She wasn’t sure if she should call him. She had breakfast with her mom, and Harmony seemed nervous. And the way she was talking, Willow is worried. Jason says, she should be. Harmony is mixed up in something serious.

Sam asks Delores what she’s doing with Spinelli’s phone. Is he all right? Delores says, he’s in custody, and Sam asks, why? Delores says, before she sends him to lockup, she wants Sam to meet her in Queen’s Point, at a bar on the corner of Third and Main.

After running into Neil at the hospital, Alexis says their situation has been on her mind. Maybe she should find another meeting. Neil says she told him that she felt at home there, but she says, there are meetings all over town, and Neil’s office is there. He says his primary focus is on addiction recovery, which is why she was referred to him. She says, and look at where they are. He says they can handle it, and she says, like they handled meeting at the opera? He says they have to come up with a different strategy. As much as he knew about her, he never pegged her for a opera lover. She says she’s more of an enthusiast. She won’t buy a ticket, but she’ll go if she’s invited. He’s not sure if he believes that, and she says, keep calling her a liar, so it will dampen her regard for him. He says, it makes sense she would like opera, since she has operatic emotions. She asks if he’s calling her a drama queen, and her phone rings. He says, saved by the bell. It’s Sam, who says she needs Alexis’s help. Spinelli has been arrested. Alexis tells Sam to text her the address; she’s on her way. She tells Neil, it looks like she’s going to have to miss her meeting. She leaves, and Doc comes by. He asks Neil if everything is okay.

Sonny says Laura wanted him to clean up the waterfront; he thought they were on the same page. She says, a lot has happened since the shootout, and he says he’s done everything he can to make sure the situation didn’t escalate. She recalls a warehouse explosion, and he says, it housed an operation run by Cyrus. She says she can’t prove that, and Sonny says he’s just as concerned as she is about the drug problem. She says she knows he’s got guys out there, and that he’s reluctant to tell her what he knows. She knows about the code, and understands, but she needs him to understand that it’s not a battle if it becomes a war. If he can’t bring an end to this, she’ll have to step in, and come down hard on crime, and it might include him.

Jason tells Willow, Harmony is involved with some dangerous people. Willow asks, how? but he tells her, just be careful; keep her distance until this is over. She says, until what’s over? and he wonders if her mom has asked her for anything. Willow says it was all she could do to talk Harmony into meeting her for breakfast. Jason says, that’s good; it means Harmony is trying to protect her. She asks, from what? Is she involved in organized crime? He says he’s told her what he can. She says, sorry, but since he obviously knows what’s going on, can he look out for her mom? He says he’ll try.

Nelle says she researched Wiley’s condition on the internet. Sasha wonders if that makes Nelle an expert after five minutes, and Nelle says, Monica is a cardiologist, and can tell her if it’s right or wrong. It’s an elective surgery, which means it’s not necessary, right? Monica says, it means, at this moment, it isn’t an emergency. Michael says it’s a preventative measure to prevent Wiley from suffering more heart damage that could threaten his life. Nelle asks if that’s a fact or theory. It’s a risk she doesn’t think she wants to take.

Monica understands Nelle is scared. No parent welcomes their child having surgery. She says, Michael seems to. He’s ready to let them work on Wiley like a frog in a biology class. Sasha says, it could give Wiley a better quality of life, for the rest of his life. What’s wrong with her? How can she say no? Nelle says, why willingly expose Wiley to the danger of surgery, when he doesn’t need it? Michael says, what if he continues to have trouble breathing? What’s Nelle’s plan then?

Chase comes back, and tells Willow, it got hairy. There was a mother in a van with squabbling kids, who was parked dangerously close to him. He realizes she’s not listening, and asks, what’s going on? She says, Jason was just there. He told her that her mom is into something dangerous, and she should do everything possible to keep her distance. That shouldn’t be too hard, since Harmony has been pushing her away. Jason thinks Harmony is trying to protect her. Chase asks, from what? and she says, Jason knows, but won’t say. It’s freaking her out even more because he’s a mobster, or whatever the legal term is. Chase says, racketeering, and she says Jason has been kind to her, and he’s the one who got through to her mom. Now it sounds like her mom is into something more dangerous than Dawn of Day. He says he knows Willow is trying to see the best in her mom, since she turned her back on Shiloh, but he can see how she fell for Shiloh in the first place. Harmony seems fierce and strong… Willow says, but it’s not the first time she’s been taken in by something dangerous. She doesn’t think it’s about Harmony this time though. She thinks this time, it’s about her.

Sonny tells Laura, the situation is shifting, and Laura asks if he’s set something in motion. He tells her, all he can say is, steps have been taken to end this. His phone rings, and he steps away for a moment, but says, sorry. He thought it was Turning Woods. She asks how Mike is doing, and he says his dad doesn’t remember him half the time, but what he doesn’t let go of is bullets whizzing by his head, and hiding under the table in a pub in Bensonhurst, screaming that he wants it to stop. It’s haunting him. She says she’s sorry, and he says, that’s why this thing with Cyrus is going to end. Jason comes in, and asks if it’s official business. He can come back. Laura says Sonny was just reassuring her about the problem. She asks if Jason has anything to add, and he says he’s sure what Sonny told her is all she needs to know. She says, good answer. She’s surprised Sonny told her as much as he did. She tells Jason, don’t worry; Sonny wasn’t specific.

Neil shows Doc his new office, and Doc says, not bad at all. It’s good to have Neil there. Neil says he’s glad to be on staff, especially after that business with the board. Doc says he heard something was going on, yet here Neil is. It clearly worked out. Neil says, yeah, and Doc says, or not. Neil says Doc doesn’t know why he was under review? Doc says, Neil caught him. He understands Neil was accused of inappropriate behavior with a former patient. Neil says he’s sure Doc knows who it is; the rumor mill travels. Doc has a sneaking suspicion it’s Alexis.

Sam introduces Alexis and Delores, and Delores says, Sam brought her mother? Alexis says she’s not there in a parental capacity, but as Sam and Spinelli’s attorney. She’d like to confer with her client. Delores says, before she does, she wants to make sure Alexis is aware of their attempt to neutralize her. Alexis asks, how? and Delores says Sam sent her friend – Alexis’s client – to spy on her; to dig up dirt to leverage against her.  Alexis says, since they have Spinelli in custody, she can only guess it didn’t go well. Delores says, clearly his forte isn’t physical surveillance. Sam asks Spinelli if he’s okay, and he says only his pride is wounded. Alexis asks if Delores is suggesting Sam violated her parole, and Spinelli says he must speak. Sam had nothing to do with it. It was his idea, and she’s an innocent woman. Delores says, right. Whether Sam returns to Pentenville to finish her sentence is entirely up to her

Monica tells Nelle, it’s a simple procedure, but Nelle says, all she sees is Wiley under anesthesia with a tube in his mouth, and that in itself can have complications. Monica says, they have the best pediatric anesthetist in the state, and Nelle says, people can and have died under anesthesia. Monica says, mostly the elderly and the most vulnerable, and Nelle says, Wiley is a baby; he’s vulnerable. Michael says, with the exception of Wiley’s heart condition, he’s strong as an ox. Nelle says, what about contagion? and Monica says, they’ll do their best to keep Wiley safe. Nelle tells her, she’s read about doctors on the internet, who feel they have to prove something to get kickbacks. Monica says, the good news is, no one there has to prove a damn thing. It’s been proven just by them being there. If Nelle wants a second opinion, she has colleagues worldwide who will be glad to take a look, but Nelle says, they’ll just agree with her. Michael says, there’s a reason for that, and Monica says she’ll get Nelle the information anyway, and leaves. Sasha asks if Michael wants her to go, and Nelle says, that would be great, since Wiley is her and Michale’s son, not Sasha’s. Sasha says, she was asking Michael, and walks away. Michael ask Nelle, what the hell is wrong with her? She’s risking Wiley’s health; why? My suggestion: get Nelle off the internet.

Willow tells Chase, her mother said it herself; everything she does is for Willow, and how happy she was that Willow is with someone who can keep her safe. Chase says, he remembers, and she says, the only thing that makes sense is, someone is using her for leverage to make Harmony do things she doesn’t want to. Sasha calls, and Willow says she’s going to tell Sasha that they’re not in the mood for skating anymore. Sasha says she’s sorry; they forgot about the skating. Willow asks if something is wrong, and Sasha is afraid so. Wiley is in the hospital.

Doc says he saw Neil and Alexis earlier, and it looked intense. Neil says, it was; it always is. Doc says Neil had told him that he was having conflicting feelings for a patient. Neil says, and Doc told him not to cross the line, and he didn’t. Alexis stopped being his patient, but they’d run into each other, like at drag Bingo. Doc laughs, and Neil says, there was an impulsive kiss. They didn’t mean for it to go further, but the board got wind of it. Doc says, the two-year rule is for a reason. Neil says, it’s over, but Doc says, it didn’t look over.

Alexis asks what Spinelli was arrested for, and Delores says, unlawful surveillance in the second degree. She cites the code, adding that the victim’s image is taken when in a private moment. Alexis says, the peeping Tom law? and Delores says, it’s six-months in jail, and a fine of $1000. Alexis says, someone can only be arrested for that, if the video or photo catches the victim in the act of disrobing or having sex. So Delores can imagine what her next question is going to be.

Laura says Sonny isn’t going to give her any details, is he? and he says, no. He just wants her to know he’s concerned. She says, it’s not just a public safety concern for him, and he says, all she needs to know is that he’s keeping it under control. She says, okay. She has no choice but to take his word. He walks her to the door, and she leaves. Sonny senses Jason’s disapproval, and says Jason doesn’t think he should have said anything. Jason says he doesn’t understand why Sonny would give even a hint about what’s going on with Cyrus and Jordan.

Delores tells the cops holding Spinelli to go. Alexis says she’s sorry to have to ask, but when Spinelli photographed her, was she in the act of disrobing or sexual activity? Spinelli says it was an extracurricular activity, and they were in the back seat. Alexis says, one more word, and she’ll let him rot. Don’t speak; don’t breathe. She asks Delores, where were they? and Delores says she and the councilman were there to discuss a sensitive legal matter, and didn’t want reporters following them. Spinelli tells Sam that Delores was half-naked. Sam asks if he got a photo, but he says the car was rocking so much, any image was blurred. That’s when Delores and her lover apprehended him. Delores tells Alexis, her client as much as admitted his guilt. She can have him held until his sentencing, and he’ll be separated from his partner and daughter. Sam asks if Delores and Donald aren’t married to other people. If it goes to trial, that will come out, and be pretty embarrassing. Delores tells Alexis, as she sees it, Sam is clearly trying to blackmail her. She thinks if she threatens Delores, Delores will ease up on her parole, and allow her to see Jason. The terms of parole clearly state she can’t associate with a known felon. Alexis asks if there’s any way Delores will consider dropping the charges.

Delores says she might be willing to make this ugly incident disappear, and Alexis asks, in exchange for what? Delores says, Sam and Spinelli keeping silent about her relationship with Councilman Raskin. Sam says, and if she refuses? and Alexis tells her to quit while she’s ahead. Delores says, the councilman will face scandal, but Sam will be in Pentenville, along with Spinelli. Alexis asks Sam if she can do that. Then Delores will forget she was complicit in blackmail and extortion as well. San says, this is extortion, and Alexis tells her not to make it worse. Shut up and take the deal.

Michael says, Nelle just wants to make him suffer; that’s why she’s refusing to sign. She’s hurting his son to hurt him. She says, not everything she does is about him, and he says she tried to talk Chase into having him killed. She left him do die, and put someone else’s dead baby in his arms, claiming it was his son. Should he keep going? She says, this has nothing to do with him. She’s protecting her son. He’s not going to die any time soon. Give her time. He says she’s not a doctor, and she won’t have a say when she’s excluded in the custody arrangement.

Jason says, when Cyrus is released, Laura is going to realize it’s part of their plan, and when he turns up dead, she’ll suspect their involvement. Sonny says, so will everybody. Even if somebody else gets to him before they do, they’ll be the prime suspects, but no one will be able to prove it’s them.

Sam says, fine. She won’t breath a word. Delores asks if Alexis can guarantee Sam and Spinelli will abide by the agreement, and Alexis says, if they don’t, she’ll personally drop them off at the Queen’s Point PD. Delores says they both know where they stand, and she won’t be intimidated. She’s going to be even more vigilant. Sam says, it’s harassment, and Delores says, it’s law enforcement. Delores leaves, and Spinelli tells Sam that he’s sorry. She says it was her one shot to get out from under Delores’s thumb; now what? Alexis says that’s not the question Sam should asking. Sam should be asking, what the hell was she thinking?

Nelle tells Michael, the law is on her side. Even without full custody, she’s still Wiley’s mother, and has a say. She’s going to visit her son. She stomps off, and Monica asks if Michael made any headway. He says, not even close, and Sasha asks what he’s going to do. He asks what options he has. How much danger is Wiley in? Willow and Chase join them, and Willow asks, what’s going on? How’s Wiley? Michael says, okay at the moment, and Monica says she’s going to check on him. Chase asks, what’s the problem? and Sasha says, like usual – Nelle.

Alexis tells Sam, of all the insanely stupid things she could have done, it was a terrible choice to blackmail her parole officer. Sam says she was thinking she wanted her family together. Alexis says, she made a decision that almost got Spinelli arrested, and her sent back to Pentenville. Delores is going to be watching now, and will send her back if she so much as drives a car without a seatbelt, and it’s her right to do it. Sam asks if Alexis is agreeing with Delores, and Alexis says Delores is doing her job. When Sam was granted parole, the agreement said she wasn’t to associate with a known felon. Instead of following the rules, she did what she wanted. Did she think of Scout and Danny? Sam says, Jason is Danny’s father, and the closest thing Scout has to one. All she wants is her family put back together. Alexis says, that’s what will happen if she holds out for two years, but Sam says, two years is a long time. Alexis says she knows exactly how long it is, but it’s Sam’s job as a parent to stick it out and suck it up. Do what she needs to get through it. Sam says, of course (🍷) Alexis would say that, and Alexis asks what Sam means.

Michael tells Willow, even though he’s Wiley’s guardian at the moment, both parents need to consent to the surgery because it’s elective. Willow says, if it gets worse, how bad can things get? Michael says, in the worst case, Wiley’s heart will deteriorate, and he’ll need an operation to save his life. Willow says they can’t risk it. Wiley needs to have the surgery now. Sasha says, it’s more important than ever that Michael win sole custody. Nelle is suddenly there, and asks, who says Michael is going to win?

Doc asks Neil, concerning him and Alexis, what did they decide? They can make the conversation confidential by Doc treating Neil as a patient. There’s a knock at the door, and Neil says, hold that thought. Laura comes in, and Neil says if the mayor was looking for her husband, Doc is helping him break in his new office. Laura says, it’s a nice surprise, but she actually came to see him. He asks to what he owes the pleasure, and she says, Port Charles is facing a crisis, and she needs his help.

Sonny tells Jason, there can’t be any evidence; nothing that ties it to them. Jason says, there won’t be, and Sonny says he doesn’t think anyone is going to shed tears about Cyrus’s death; they’ll be relieved. Jason says, and Laura? Sonny says, she wants the problem solved, and they’re solving the problem. He’s going to bring peace back to Port Charles.

Sam says she doesn’t know what the hell happened to Alexis. It’s not the drinking, and it’s not Julian, but Alexis became a pushover who plays by the rules and refuses to fight. Alexis says Sam doesn’t know what she’s been fighting, and Sam says Alexis cooperated with the board when she could have questioned the system, so they would question it too. Alexis says, it’s not that simple, and Sam says, what about Neil? Is there a connection? Does he make Alexis feel good? Then why the hell not fight for him? Alexis says, it wasn’t an option, but Sam says, it’s too difficult. Alexis is afraid she’ll get in trouble. She was never scared before. She used to be persistent. She was Sam’s hero, but now she obeys the rules, and sits back. She doesn’t do anything Sam used to admire. Sam wanted to be like her, and now Sam just feels sorry for her.

Nelle tells Michael, it’s rare for the father to get sole custody, and he says, it’s not common, but it’s not rare. Willow adds, unless the mother is unfit. Nelle says she didn’t give her baby up, and Willow says at least she didn’t hand her baby to someone on the side of the road. Nelle says, as of right now, Wiley is healthy and happy, and she promised to protect him from anyone poking around inside him or harming him. Willow suggests, if Nelle wants that, stay away from him. Nelle says she’s going to do everything in her power to keep her promise, and protect her son. She walks away, and Sasha asks if Michael is okay. He says he’s not letting Nelle into Wiley’s life. She’s done enough to jeopardize his health. Willow says, he doesn’t have a choice. He needs to do whatever it takes to get full custody.

Jason tells Sonny, he ran into Willow, and gave her a heads up about Harmony. Sonny says, good. She helped Kristina, and he doesn’t want her in the line of fire. He doesn’t want anyone traumatized like his father is. Jason asks if Mike hasn’t recovered from what happened in Brooklyn, and Sonny says, the opposite. He’s been worse. Jason says he’s sorry to hear that, and asks if there’s anything he can do. Sonny says, when he was at Turning Woods, Mike was there with Brook, and he was having a great time. Brook said, when things are cloudy, the things he remembers mostly are about Sonny’s family. Not recent things, but old memories; ancient history. That’s what comforts him. Sonny’s phone rings, and he tells Jason, it’s Turning Woods.

Sam tells Alexis, she’s so sorry. She didn’t mean what she said. She’s really angry at Delores. Alexis is right; she was selfish, desperate, and stupid. She asks if Alexis accepts her apology, and Alexis says, of course (🍷). She just needs a little time. Spinelli interjects that the jalapeno poppers are on the way. Sam says, talk to her, and Alexis says she will, but not right now. She just needs space. Sam suggests she and Spinelli go home to their kids; they almost didn’t have them. Alexis says she’ll call Sam tomorrow, and Spinelli says, on behalf of Ellie, Georgie, and himself, he thanks her for her help. They leave, and Alexis stands at the bar. The bartender puts a shot in front of her, and says it looks like she’s having a hard night. He thought she could use a drink.

Neil asks what Laura needs him to do, and she says, Port Charles has a new drug lord in town, who’s flooding the streets with his product. She has to find a way to stay ahead. She’s talked with the heads of GH, and they’re going to open a clinic, his area of expertise. Doc says Neil’s reputation precedes him, but they did ask what he thought. Laura says Doc sang Neil’s praises about a seminar he gave, and Neil asks if he’ll be working with Laura’s husband. She says, that’s up to him, and Doc says, it’s not his specialty, but he’d be happy to help. Neil says, great. They can talk as soon as he puts an idea together for the clinic. He and Doc can catch up later. Doc asks if Neil doesn’t want to continue their discussion, and Laura apologizes for interrupting. Neil says they can catch up any time. He likes to give recovering patients the dignity they deserve. Laura says he’s just he guy she was looking for, and Neil leaves to talk to the head of the department.

Alexis remembers Sam saying she cooperated instead of fighting back, and the meeting with the board at Neil’s review. She thinks about Neil telling her that he doesn’t want to say goodbye to his career, or her, and wondering how they can pretend it never happened. She remembers saying that’s immaterial; he has his practice back. She downs the shot, as I say, nooo.

Tomorrow, Trina talks to Josslyn about Cameron, Carly says she’ll deal with Nelle, and Alexis asks for another drink.

🥙 On Top Chef tonight, there was no quickfire challenge. Instead, the chefs were to explore L.A.’s food scene, using the late food critic Jonathan Gold’s 101 Best Restaurants of L.A. Less a food critic than food lover, Gold was the only food critic to have won a Pulitzer Prize, and his guide includes unique food trucks, mom and pop cafés, and ethnic cuisine. In the elimination challenge, the chefs were instructed to create a dish from anything that inspired them during their exploration – a dish they loved, a story they heard, or food they tasted. At the Union Square train station, they would be serving 200 guests who knew Jonathan personally, along with guest judge Ruth Reichl, a foodie extraordinaire. Tom said Gold wrote about what he loved, and if you cook what you love, you’ll make great food.

After their exploration, the chefs went shopping at Whole Foods, which was probably the last thing they felt like doing after all that eating. Being a close friend of Gold’s, it was an emotional challenge for Padma. Out of the top three – Kevin, Nini, and Bryan – Kevin was tonight’s winner, with a pork and mushroom terrine, involving his granny’s apple butter, which was a major hit with Ruth. He told the judges that he had a personal connection with the challenge, as he had spent a long time battling an illness, and didn’t know if he’d still be cooking, or even be there at all. He proved to himself that his journey wasn’t over. Ruth thought the bottom three – Angelo, Stephanie, and Eric – had forgotten food was supposed to be delicious. Ouch! Angelo had to pack up his knives, since his tuna crudo was overly sweet, and the components never came together. In Angelo’s interview, he said he thought his dish was balanced, but wasn’t letting his circumstances define him, as he moved on to Last Chance Kitchen.

Next time, the chefs visit a museum, and are challenged to interpret a work of art on a plate.

🍽 No Worries Here…

But I’d be remiss not to include a Top Chef’s passing. Please note, he had not only felt ill after traveling overseas, but went to the hospital, which oddly, can be the worst place for a sick person.

🍤 An L.A. Legend…

I’ve only been to Los Angeles once, for a V convention. Unfortunately, it was a first for the people who put the convention together, and we had little time to go to the bathroom, much less explore the city. But while I didn’t get to experience the food that the Top Chef contestants did tonight, one place I did get to eat at was Clifton’s Cafeteria, probably the weirdest restaurant I’ve ever seen. The food was fantastic, and incredibly cheap, so we ate like kings for a couple of bucks. Sadly, it’s since closed, but forever imbedded in my memory, will be the woodland scenes tucked into every nook and cranny possible, like some weird Disney show that ended up on the Food Network.

💰 Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles begins its new season on May 5th.

🧸 Wishing Andy Well…

You can’t keep a good Bravolebrity down.

🏡 Quarantine Makes Strange Bedfellows…

I can’t wait to see how this plays out.

🐉 Blink and You Missed It…

In last Sunday’s episode, Westworld gave a nod to Game of Thrones.

🧾 Every Day Is Saturday…

While right now, Friday doesn’t exactly have the same connotation it usually does, you’ve made it through week one. No one likes rules, but hopefully, everyone is behaving like adults. New Jersey was just declared a major disaster area, but I’ve been telling people it was for years now.

And now, and explanation on why instructions have to be compulsory.