Category Archives: real housewives

April 17, 2019 – Willow Reveals a Secret About Secrets, Bethenny’s Dinner Party, Fun With Thrones & Close


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

The doorbell rings at Anna and Finn’s place. Finn opens the door to find Chase with non-alcoholic champagne. Chase asks how it went, and says, here’s to the future Doctor and Mrs. Hamilton. Finn closes the door, leaving Chase outside. Chase says, Finn?

Elizabeth gets a text from Franco. She calls him and gets voicemail. She says she knows he’s upset, but they need to work through this as a family. Where is he?

Getting out of the elevator at Nina’s office. He walks in, and asks if she remembers how great it was to be self-centered all the time. Weren’t those the days? She asks what brings him by, and he says they need to talk about their step-kids.

Michael is glad Willow broke away. She did everything to protect her baby and lost it. Willow says he has it wrong, and it’s her fault. She’s been lying to him. Her baby didn’t die. He says they met in grief counseling, and she says she was grieving, just not the same way. She wasn’t there because her baby died. She was there because she gave him up for adoption.

Sonny looks through Shiloh’s book at the MetroCourt. Margaux comes in, and says he’s drinking coffee there like a law abiding citizen. He says it’s his coffee, and his wife’s restaurant. He thought they had an understanding, and Margaux agrees, but says it won’t stop her from prosecuting him. She tells him not to think he won’t slip up. He asks if she thinks he has something to hide, and she says, we all have something.

Brad sure does. He looks up classes on the DOD website, and registers for a seminar. Jason walks up, and says he has a question about the cup. Brad says, there were no traces of anything toxic. Jason says, only tea and Valerian root. Brad says some people call it nature’s Valium because it reduces anxiety. Jason sees the computer screen, and asks if Brad is a member of DOD.

Shiloh comes back to the DOD house, and Sam asks if he found Kristina. He says he checked GH and Mercy, but she’s not there. He thinks he knows what happened. He thinks she was kidnapped by Jason. Sam laughs, and he asks if she doesn’t think he’s capable of it. She says, of course (🍷), but she doesn’t think that’s what happened. She thinks Kristina got cold feet, and is embarrassed to come back. Shiloh says he has proof. She says, how? and he says he has evidence that suggests Jason broke in and grabbed her while they were at The Floating Rib.

Nina asks if Franco and Elizabeth didn’t get married. He says, it was a jailhouse wedding, and she says, romance is different for everyone. She wonders why he wants to talk about their kids, and he says, their step-kids, Charlotte and Aiden. The situation has gotten worse, and the awfulness is more widespread. Nina says, that’s not Charlotte’s fault, but he says, it became her fault when she decided to bully Aiden.

Finn opens the door again, and says Chase is still there. Chase says he’s a detective, and understands the subtleties of human behavior. The door slam was a cry for help. Finn tells him to keep a cork in it; the celebration is on ice. Chase asks if Anna turned him down, but Finn says he didn’t get the chance to ask her. The timing wasn’t right. Chase asks, what’s wrong? Finn doesn’t answer, and Chase says if they’re brothers, they need to be brothers. Finn is supposed to tell him stuff. Finn says he was going to be the guy who gets down on one knee in a crowded restaurant and makes a fool of himself, but Anna’s attention was divided. Chase asks, what by? and Finn says, her strange son. She was focused on him, then her ex showed up. Chase says, again? Finn tells him, Robert’s not the problem, and he might help Anna find the truth. Chase says, about? and Finn says, something in her past. Chase can’t imagine how complicated her past must be. Finn asks, how you can convince someone the past doesn’t matter and doesn’t define them? but Chase says he’s talking to the wrong man.

Willow says she let Michael think they’d both lost a child. Michael says they did both lose a child. She says she shouldn’t have been there. Michael says, maybe it’s selfish on his part, but he’s glad she chose to go to the group. If she hadn’t, they might not know each other. She says he doesn’t regret it by now? but he says, no; not now or ever. He’s glad her child is alive. He can’t imagine knowing her child is out there or how he is or where he is. She says, that’s just it; he’s still here in Port Charles. He asks if she knows the adoptive family. Do they let her see him? She says, in some ways, it’s a relief to be open about it. Other than Chase, Michael is the only person she can talk to. Her son is being raised by people who love him, which brings a measure of peace. Michael says, but she regrets having to give him up. She says she wouldn’t had it been an open adoption, but she gave up all parental rights to make sure… Michael finishes, that Shiloh never found out. She says, now that Shiloh has found her… He says, she needs to make sure he never knows she had his son.

Sonny tells Margaux, while she’s waiting for him to make a fatal mistake, try correcting her own – accepting that Ryan Chamberlain is dead. She says he went over the Falls lost and lost his hand. Sonny says, and last time, he burned death. He suggests she reopen the case. She says it’s out of her jurisdiction. Sonny asks if she’s looked his victims in the eye, and told them it’s not her problem. They deserve justice. She asks if he’s seriously talking to her about justice, and says, revenge is sweet, but it’s gone in a moment, and leaves you hungry, hard, and bitter. He asks if she’s out for revenge. She says she has been at times, but passion gives her a purpose. Sonny sees her glance at the book.

Brad tells Jason that he’s taken a seminar or two to destress from parenting. Jason asks how that’s working out, and Brad says he’s not twitching anymore, so there must be something to it. Lucas joins them, and tells Brad that they’ll have to play it by ear with DOD tonight. He thought he’d be free, but might have to fill in. Brad starts to leave, but Jason holds out his hand, and says, the cup. Brad hands it over, and leaves. Lucas asks if there’s a problem, and Jason says Brad was just doing him a favor. He asks if Lucas is really into DOD. Lucas says it’s way too new age for him, but Brad has taken some classes, and read the book twice. It seems to help him. Maybe Jason should look into it. Jason says maybe he will.

Sam tells Shiloh, it’s her fault. If she hadn’t been such a mess last night, he’d have been there. He says, the only one responsible for Jason’s actions is Jason. Ever since Sam joined, Jason has been consumed with hate for him and everything he stands for. Sam says it’s convinced her this is where she’s supposed to be. He’s glad for that, but it doesn’t help them find Kristina.

Elizabeth passes Lucas in the hall, and he asks if she’s okay. She says, fine; she just has a lot on her mind. Lucas asks if she wants to talk. She insists she’s fine, but he’s not buying it. How is she really? Elizabeth says she’s not great, and he asks how parenting is going. She says she’s making a mess of it. He jokes he’s been at it a whole nine months, so he’s an expert. He asks how Aiden is doing.

Nina tells Franco that her beautiful, brilliant stepdaughter, who speaks impeccable French, can tell a Manet from a Monet, and watch four hours of Figaro, is not a bully. He says, she made a kid who already feels small, feel tiny. Call it what she wants. She knows Charlotte said unkind things, but she was reprimanded by the school, her teachers, and her parents, including her. She apologized for being unkind, and the behavior has stopped. He says, except it hasn’t.

Sonny tells Margaux that he has a simple philosophy. He takes care of his own even when the authorities drop the ball. She says when you take action outside the law, you’re not a protector, but a criminal. Jason comes out of the elevator, and asks if there’s a problem. Margaux says they were just having a discussion. She tells Jason, when he attacked Shiloh, he acted like a man whose attorney would get him off. Jason says Diane is excellent, but Margaux says it wasn’t Diane who got him off; it was Shiloh. She hopes he learned from Shiloh’s act of kindness, but somehow doubts it.

Shiloh tells Sam that he forgave Jason, but Jason is a dangerous man. Sam asks if he has proof. They can call the cops. Shiloh says it won’t stand up in court, but luckily they have the one thing Jason has ever cared about – her.

Finn thought Willow was dealing with her ex, and Chase says, things between them have never been better. They went skating, he fell a lot, and they had a good laugh. The problem with her ex is like with Anna’s past; he won’t go away. Her ex has a hold on her. Finn asks if she’s having trouble getting over him, but Chase says, it’s the other way around. Her ex isn’t letting go.

Willow tells Michael that Shiloh can’t find out about the baby, but his sister needs help. She’ll be happy to talk to Kristina about her experiences in DOD. Michael says Willow warned him about the Trust, and they were able to get her out before they finished. Willow says, before it even happens, Shiloh gets leverage in place. Michael asks, what kind? and she says he convinces the member to make an offer he calls a pledge. Michael says he’s heard the term, but what does it mean? She says, what it means is that the member willingly gives Shiloh a sword to hold over their head forever.

Margaux tells Jason that she’d love to give him some friendly advice. He was lucky last time. If he targets Shiloh again, his luck will run out. Sonny says they’re too busy running a business to pay attention to self-help gurus. She hopes so. She sits at one of the tables.

Jason asks Sonny if he thinks Margaux knows about kidnapping Kristina. Sonny says it’s possible Shiloh told her something. Jason asks if he’s reading Shiloh’s book again, and Sonny says Neil told them it’s important to understand where Kristina is coming from for the exit therapy. Jason asks how that’s going, and Sonny says he discovered something interesting. Before Jason got there, Margaux said something; revenge is sweet, but gone in a moment and leaves you hungry. He taps the book, and says, she was quoting Shiloh. Margaux is a true believer, which makes her dangerous. He and Margaux look at each other.

Sam tells Shiloh she doesn’t understand. How can she prove Jason kidnapped her sister? He says it’s not about proving something or accusing. It’s about the people who claim to love Kristina. Who does she think sent Jason? She asks if he thinks Jason is taking orders from someone. Shiloh asks if Jason has ever done anything Sonny didn’t know about or approve.

Elizabeth tells Lucas that Aiden was the only one out of his entire class not invited to the party. It hurts to be excluded. He says, especially at that age. She adds that Bianca was Aiden’s best friend. She wanted him there, but her parents excluded him. He says, for the same reason Elizabeth wanted Aiden to know two guys skating together was okay. She says it spread to the other kids, and one of them called Aiden a fairy boy. Cameron got in a fight with the kid, and got suspended. Lucas says, good for him, standing up for his brother. Elizabeth says, yeah, except he was angry because they were calling Aiden gay when it wasn’t true, and asked if Aiden could be less gay. Franco freaked out, and said Cameron didn’t want to take the flack because his brother was different. She wasn’t easy on him either, but when she thought about it, Cameron is just a kid. Even though he was wrong, he was just saying it to protect Aiden from bullying. He wasn’t malicious, and she gave him zero credit.

Franco tells Nina, what Charlotte did was awful, but it’s spiraled out of control. The kids are making fun of Aiden for being different. Nina says, he’s just awkward, but Franco says, they’re calling him fairy boy. Nina asks if the school isn’t doing anything. Aren’t the kids supposed to be woke? He says it trickles down from the parents. It can and does still happen. Nina says the school year is almost over. Can’t he ride it out? Franco asks if she’s kidding him. She wants Aiden to ride it out? She says she’s sorry; that’s not what she meant to say. It was stupid. She’s stupid. Franco says she’s not stupid. Now that they agree, will she help out? Nina asks what he wants her to do, and he says, get Charlotte to be Aiden’s friend.

Willow tells Michael, before they join the Trust, you give proof of your loyalty. Michael says, not financial, and Willow says, it’s a different kind of gift. You give Shiloh a secret. Something, that should it come to light, would destroy you or someone you love. The candidate writes or records it, and Shiloh transcribes it. This means Kristina has already given the pledge. Shiloh can make your secrets public. Michael asks, did she? and she says, to her eternal regret. He asks why Shiloh hasn’t used it, and she thinks he still believes he can make her go back. When knows for sure… Michael says Shiloh is guilty of fraud and extortion. Willow hopes he can be arrested. Michael says, in the meantime, she can’t risk antagonizing him. He tells her, stay out of it, but she says she can still talk to his sister. Michael tells her, hypothetically, if they took Kristina, and holding her somewhere, it might be considered kidnapping. There’s no way he’s letting her get involved in that.

Jason tells Sonny that he had the cup tested. According to Brad, it was just tea and Valerian root. Sonny says they know she was drugged. Why would Brad lie? Jason says, Brad is a new convert. Sonny says, son of a bitch. Jason guesses Shiloh knows something’s up with them and Kristina. He thinks Brad got rid of the evidence, but he has it, and there’s still residue. Sonny says he needs someone he can trust. He’s calling Brick.

Sam tells Shiloh, there’s nothing Sonny could ask that Jason wouldn’t do. Shiloh says if Sonny asked him to take Kristina and hold her somewhere, would she know where that would be? Sam says Jason knows she’s there. He’s secretive and suspicious, and that means Sonny is too. If they know anything, they’re not telling her. Shiloh says, that means Kristina could be anywhere. Sam is afraid so. Shiloh says, that’s not a problem. Not for her.

Chase tells Finn, the hell with waiting. Let’s crack this baby open. Things are going well with him and Willow, but he won’t propose as long as this thing from the past is hanging over her. Finn says, instead of celebrating, they’re comparing relationships. Chase suggests they toast to something else. The two of them. They’ve gone from strangers to being brothers. Chase says, to brotherhood, and they clink glasses, Chase says since they worked out, maybe there’s hope for Finn and their dad.

Lucas tells Elizabeth, it sounds like they’re doing everything right. She says the boys are so unhappy. He says Franco is an artist, so he knows how to deal with Aiden. He knows he’s not alone if they make it their mission to let him know that it’s not just okay, but preferable to be different. She says, what about Cameron, and Lucas says he can’t be beating up every bigot. It doesn’t help. The best way to change minds is to teach with compassion. Make it look cool. She says he helped, and he says she can make it up to him by having them over for dinner. She says he’s on.

Nina tells Franco, there’s nothing she would like more than Charlotte being Aiden’s friend, but she can’t choose Charlotte’s friends. She has to be on board. Franco says Charlotte is a trendsetter. Doesn’t she if Charlotte shows the kids that they’re friends, the rest will come around? Nina says, they probably will. She’ll definitely try to do this. He thanks her, and she says all they can do is try. He leaves.

Willow appreciates Michael not wanting to involve her in what’s essentially a kidnapping. He says he hasn’t confirmed that’s what it was, so she’s still in the clear. Even though he’s not saying that’s what it is, it would be Kristina’s third time. She was kidnapped by a gangster, Joe Skully, when they were kids, and Michael’s biological father kidnapped him, Morgan, and Kristina. Willow says, so kidnapping is normal in his family? He says, except this alleged abduction is for her own good. She says, whoever loves Kristina the most, has the most to lose. It could be any one of them. Shiloh has a bomb, and she has to find a way do this. She’s been passive too long. Michael says she was just protecting her child, and she says, meanwhile, Shiloh claims another victim. It has to stop. Anything she can do to help, she wants to do it.

Sam tells Shiloh that he doesn’t understand. When Jason and Sonny hide someone, they stay hidden. Shiloh says she has a unique skill set that no one else there has. She can make Jason reveal things that he never would to anyone else. She asks if Shiloh wants her to work a con so he can figure out where Jason hid Kristina.

Franco sees Elizabeth at the hospital. He asks where Cameron is, and she says, community service. He tells her that he reached out to a friend, a fellow parent who can help. She says she did the same. Maybe with their friends’ help, they can make it better for the boys, She takes Franco’s hand, and presses the elevator button.

Nina calls Charlotte. She knows Charlotte is super busy, but asks if Charlotte can clear her schedule for her. She’d like to set up a playdate for her and a friend.

Brad asks Lucas is he still has to cover. Lucas says he’s free, but if it’s all the same, he was wondering if they could skip DOD. Brad says, but he’s free, and Lucas says he was thinking maybe they could have a nice evening with their son, and see what they can learn from that. Brad says, all right. Lucas talked him into it.

Shiloh tells Sam that he’d never ask her to use the methods she’s employed in the past. He’s not judging. What happened with his father is in the past. She’s finding rediscovery and reinvention. It’s all about this woman here now. It’s all about the truth, and he’s just asking her to be his truth seeker. It’s the only way to save Kristina from the people who want to cause her heartache, and bring her back to those who love her for who she is and can be. If anyone can find her, it’s Sam. Help bring her back to them.

Finn tells Chase that he’s glad they’re like this, but it’s a different relationship with their dad. He hopes Chase respects that. Chase gets it, but he can’t blame a guy for trying. Finn says, if Willow is hell bent on a lost cause, shouldn’t Chase practice, so he doesn’t embarrass himself again at the roller rink? Chase thinks she digs guys with a shaky sense of balance. He’s golden. Finn asks what he’s doing there. Chase says he can take a hint, and tells Finn, save some bubbles for Anna. About her past, keep it there; he’s her present, and she’s his future. Just give her the damn ring. Outside, he calls Willow.

Outside Charlie’s, Willow is glad he called. He asks if she wants to get dinner tonight. His place, her place, any place. She has to take a raincheck. A friend has a problem, and she promised to help out. He hopes it works out. She says, her too, and she’s holding him to the raincheck. He says, deal. Someone watches Willow from Charlie’s.

Michael meets Jason and Sonny at the MetroCourt. He ask how Kristina is, and Sonny says the doctor wants them to do a family intervention. Michael says before that happens, he found out Shiloh has an insurance policy, in case members try to leave. Sonny asks, what kind? Michael tells him, they share a secret. Highly sensitive information, as proof of their commitment, but it’s really… Jason says, leverage. Sonny says, Shiloh has something on Kristina, and Michael says, or someone she loves. Someone like him.

Tomorrow, Oscar needs a favor, Shiloh isn’t letting Sam do this alone, and Sonny says Shiloh might have leverage over him.

The Real Housewives of New York City

We backtrack a little, with Sonja gesturing wildly, and saying, you don’t touch the effing Morgan letters. Bethenny asks what just happened. Sonja begins to sob, and Ramona says they didn’t mean to upset her. Sonja says it was awful, and goes into repetitive mode. In her interview, Tinsley suggests an exorcism. Bethenny tries to calm her down, but Sonja says Bethenny wasn’t there. Bethenny takes Sonja aside, and tells her, everything is not a ten. In Ramona’s interview, she thinks going to the house stirred up memories. She’s not surprised at how Sonja is acting. I would suppose being drunk doesn’t help. We flash back to Ramona telling Dorinda that Sonja is going into a hole. Bethenny tells Sonja to pick her battles, while at the table, Ramona, in a flash of genius says, it’s emotional. LuAnn and Dorinda return from outside, and ask how Sonja is doing. Ramona says she had a breakdown, and Bethenny took her from the table. Bethenny says, it’s the wine talking, and Sonja says she has to protect herself, and not lose her sh*t. Bethenny says, that ship already sailed. In a surprise move, Ramona makes sense, and says she doesn’t think they were the original letters. Dorinda says, they’re not. Ramona goes out to tell Sonja the letters weren’t real. Bethenny says they’re not talking about it again. They all go back to the table, and LuAnn asks if it’s over. Sonja says she took the pressure off herself, and is going to have fun. She immediately starts harassing Barbara about going to Bethenny’s room. Bethenny tells her to drink some water. In Bethenny’s interview, she says the best way to handle Sonja is with a muzzle.

Ramona changes into a black teddy. In her interview, Dorinda is puzzled, since there are no men showing up, and the Naked Chef plays for the other team. Ramona flashes her thong. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, everything is a chaotic mess. Sonja loses her sh*t, and Ramona shows up in a negligee. Welcome to the Berkshires. Sonja asks where Coco is, and Ramona says with a helper in the kitchen. In Bethenny’s interview, she says she’s coming back as Ramona. She wants to evolve to the place where she shows up in a silk handkerchief and heels for dinner. What does her after dinner outfit look like? Bethenny says she usually heads upstairs after dinner, but she’s feeling the group, and could use a laugh. She needs dancing and laughing. We see clips of them acting insane. In her interview, LuAnn says, the Berkshires looks a lot crazier when you don’t drink. Barbara says she’s going to bed; she’s scared. Bethenny says, they needed to let loose. With this group, she could tell someone to go screw themselves, and be dancing with them ten minutes later. We’re a group of tough skinned bitches.

In her interview, Sonja says she’s heard rumors about Barbara, and thinks Bethenny is naïve when it comes to these women. Sonja is coming from a place of love admiration; she doesn’t want to get in Bethenny’s pants. In Barbara’s interview, she says, watching the sunrise, she knew her bags were never unpacked, and she was zipping that bitch up, and getting out of there. She tells Dorinda that her house is gorgeous, and she had fun. LuAnn leaves with her. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she accomplished what she needed to do; reestablish a connection with LuAnn, and keep Barbara out of it.

Dorinda and Bethenny go for a walk. Bethenny says Dorinda is going to freak out when she shows her something. When she was in Boston, there was a pad by the hotel phone, and this was on it. She hands Dorinda a paper. Dorinda says she doesn’t get it. She reads, wow, you look spectacular. You’re amazing as always. D. Dorinda asks if Dennis wrote like this, and Bethenny tells her, he always said spectacular. Dorinda says, it’s weird. In Bethenny’s interview, she says Dorinda has experienced death, and is open to alternative approaches. Bethenny thinks he’s trying to send her a message. In her interview, Dorinda says there are signs all over the place. Part of it is, we’re looking for them, but they’re undeniably real. She tells Bethenny that she can make Dennis happy by moving forward.

Back in NYC, Bethenny talks to housekeeper Lanie about having movie night with Brynn and the dogs. Brynn is only into PB&J right now, and Bethenny gets out supplies. Lanie asks if Brynn is having a playdate, but Bethenny says it’s going to be mommy and me. They’re doing art day today, and making cupcakes. She wants to look at the cards she saved from Dennis’s flowers. In her interview, she says she’s seeing someone in Boston. She’s moving forward, but of all the people to lose, Dennis was ever present. She can’t get him t of her head. She looks through old greeting cards, and gets weepy. Lanie misses him too. They look at photos. Bethenny points out one of Dennis and cookie, and one on the night they got engaged. She’d worn the earrings he got for her. In Bethenny’s interview, she says she’s tired of this. It’s not the life she wants, but it’s hard to break away from this. Harder than you think. She tells Lanie, you never know. She should have kept the card from the flowers the new guy sent. Lanie says she saved it.

Ramona is meeting LuAnn and Sonja at a salon, and she brings Coco with her. She says Coco is getting a blowout. She wants Coco with her because she’s getting old, and time with her is precious. She explains that Coco might only have a good year left. In her interview, LuAnn wonders if she’s giving the dog a death wish. The stylist says, dogs are welcome. Ramona tells LuAnn that she was funny when they went out to dinner, and wanted to stay at the hotel. LuAnn says she’s super sensitive right now, and in touch with her emotions. Ramona says she never saw LuAnn like that, and LuAnn says she was pissed and made a scene. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. Or, as my father used to add, gets replaced. Ramona is glad she didn’t stay at the hotel. LuAnn says she’s glad too, since she was able to reconnect with Dorinda. In her interview, she says she and Dorinda were like sisters; they were raised the same way. It’s nice to be back as friends, and not in the drama. Sonja joins them, and declines a drink. LuAnn asks if she remembers talking to Barbara at the table. Sonja says she apologized, but had wanted to punch Barbara’s lights out, but she wasn’t the only one to step on toes. Tinsley and Dorinda told Bethenny what LuAnn had said about Bethenny not being queen, and she should have the room. LuAnn doesn’t give a sh*t. In Ramona’s interview, she can’t believe LuAnn is rolling her eyes, since Bethenny helped her when she was on her flat ass. Or flat, drunk ass. Sonja says Bethenny just got LuAnn a lawyer, and remember the intervention? After having to think about that, LuAnn appreciates it, but says the least Bethenny can do is give her the goddam room. I think she’s joking, but then she makes fun of Bethenny, and then I think she’s just being mean. In her interview, she says she never knows where she stands with Bethenny. One day, Bethenny is saving her life, and the next, bashing her with a baseball bat. She tells them if Bethenny wants to be upset with her, bring it on.

Sonja and Ramona go to a flower place. Ramona is happy she and Bethenny are in a good place. She’s getting two arrangements for Bethenny’s dinner party table. She asks what Sonja is wearing, and Sonja tells her not to ask Bethenny dumb [sic] questions that she could google, like what sparkly means. She also thinks Ramona should cool it with the flowers. In her interview, Sonja says Ramona is overdoing it, as usual. They move on to lunch.

Tinsley meets LuAnn for lunch. LuAnn says the crosstown traffic was a nightmare. Tell me about it. The one and only time I ever took a bus was when I thought I could get across town faster than walking. Wrong. LuAnn wonders why we don’t have cars that hover. In her interview, LuAnn says the hardest part of staying sober is not picking up a drink each day. She takes it day by day, and it’s a struggle. Tinsley tells LuAnn that her dad was an alcoholic, and died three years ago. Alcohol didn’t kill him, but he ended up falling when he was drinking, and had frontal lobe damage. He went into a coma, and after two weeks died in a hospice. She hasn’t been around someone with drinking issues since then. Her reaction was always why does she have to walk on eggshells because someone is drinking. She’s angry at him for dying. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she pushes back when someone has a drinking problem. she tells LuAnn that she thinks the person is choosing over their loved ones. LuAnn says, most people think alcoholics chose drinking, but that’s not the truth. It’s a disease. Tinsley starts to cry, saying, she doesn’t see it like that. LuAnn says people can’t control it. Tinsley says if a person is allergic to peanuts, they don’t eat them, but LuAnn says it’s a disease of the mind. The mind doesn’t think correctly. In her interview, Tinsley says she doesn’t have sympathy even when she should, because she lived it. LuAnn says Tinsley needs to forgive her father. Tinsley says she’s still dealing with the loss, and LuAnn says, you go through phases, and she’s stuck in angry. She suggests Tinsley go to Al-Anon, and explains that it helps the families and friends of alcoholics by sharing experiences. She thinks it would help Tinsley. (Very useless trivia. My husband and I both worked for Al-Anon’s main office when we met. Loved my job. Hated non-profit pay.) Tinsley jumps to another subject by telling LuAnn that she’s hosting the Big Apple Circus. In her interview, she says she’s working with a publicist again. He’s been letting people know she’s available to host different events, and she got the gig. She’s going to be the guest ring master. LuAnn thinks she’ll look adorable in the outfit.

Bethenny gets her hair done, while also getting a vitamin IV. The nurse says it will give her energy, but Bethenny doesn’t want any more energy. She just wants health and wellness. In her interview, she says she’s multitasking, and it’s a cluster f**k. She’s giving a dinner party, and has no time to waste. Welcome to her world. She tells the stylist that her ex-boyfriend Russ is there. She didn’t know he was coming, and she’d just had a facial. It’s not when you want to see your ex. He has a staffing company, and any time she’s hired them, he didn’t come. This time, he showed up. She says they dated last summer, and were madly in love, but Dennis came in hot. She phased out and disappeared. It was a disaster. Russ, who is gorgeous and brought his dog, tells Bethenny that he has to go. She asks him to give her five minutes. The stylist says she didn’t expect him to be that fine. Bethenny tells Russ that she’s sorry, and hugs him. He tells her not to scare his guys. She says, they could get scared. They could get laid, but probably don’t want to. In Bethenny’s interview, she says they’re in for a bumpy ride. Her skin won’t be the only bumpy thing tonight.

It’s Bethenny’s first official party. She hasn’t had a formal dinner party there, and she’s proud of her home. It’s beautiful, but homey, and she wants to use it. In a shocking twist, Ramona asks for vodka in a large wine glass with a lot of ice. Then she asks for a straw. Dorinda suggests giving her a crazy straw, and I literally lol. Lanie brings a metal straw, and Ramona asks if she can take it home with her. Geez. She can’t buy one of her own. Even I have one I bought at a flea marker. Tinsley comes in next, followed by Sonja, who says Bethenny always has the best food. Dorinda says she got flowers from LuAnn, thanking her for the weekend, and saying she was happy they made up. Everyone is thrilled Barbara comes bearing wine. A caviar and vodka spread is brought out. Barbara wonders where LuAnn is, and Sonja says she’ll probably come in wearing a Chiquita headdress. Bethenny says, every day is a cabaret. Ramona tells Bethenny not to be upset, but she has a date at 8 o’clock. Bethenny says, do you, and the bell rings. Bethenny says, the cabaret has begun. She’s an hour and fifteen minutes late. In Bethenny’s interview, she says, when you’re a cabaret star, time means something very different. The Countess is here. The cabaret can begin. LuAnn complains about traffic, and not only did she just use that one, in Sonja’s interview, she says they all came from uptown. She can’t believe LuAnn played the traffic card.

Bethenny says they had a breakthrough in the Berkshires, and toasts to them all being in a good place. And everyone being sparkly. Dorinda toasts Barbara surviving the fish bedroom, saying she’s probably woken up with scarier things than the shark. Taking the high road, Barbara says, it was lovely. In her interview, she says she knows what Dorinda is doing, and she’s not taking the bait like that tacky shark. Bethenny suggests a game of Truth or Dare, which never goes well. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she hates that game, pointing out the last time didn’t go well. We flash back to Carole – who I apparently don’t miss, because I always forget she was on this show – asking how old Tinsley was when she had anal sex. Bethenny says she’ll take either. Ramona says, dare, and asks if Bethenny thinks she’ll fall in love again. I guess Ramona used up her smarts for the day, and they have to explain that’s a truth. Ramona’s excuse is that she’s just enjoying the ambience. In her interview, Bethenny says, when she doesn’t want to strangle Ramona, it’s joyful to laugh with and at her. LuAnn dares Bethenny to kiss Barbara, and she does, declaring Barbara a good kisser. Ramon has to go, and Sonja says she didn’t come to watch Bethenny make out with Barbara. In her interview, Sonja admits to being jealous, and wanting to beat Barbara there. Barbara asks if Tinsley has ever kissed a girl. Tinsley says, never, and Sonja wonders how she and Scott do it. In Tinsley’s interview, she says just because she has manners, and dresses a certain way, doesn’t mean she’s not a freak in the sheets. Dorinda is up next, and says she’ll do anything but show a body part. Bethenny ask about phone sex, but that’s not how Dorinda rolls. In Dorinda’s interview, she imitates someone having phone sex, and says, they’d run. It’s not her thing. Bethenny wants her to call John, and put it on speaker. She calls and says she can’t wait to see him. They haven’t had sexy time in a while, and she misses him. He likes what he hears, and she sends him a huge kiss. The woman are gesturing, but it’s more sweet than sexy. After the call, Dorinda says it was the best she can do. Okay, that was funny. Bethenny hugs her. Sonja says it was good for her. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she can always count on John for sex talk.

Bethenny asks if Tinsley has had phone sex, and that’s another never. Barbara tells her to start tonight. Get Scott on the phone. Bethenny can’t believe they’re not together, and never do it. How many Chanel bags can she get in a week? Sonja says she’d rather have sex than a Chanel bag. Tinsley tells them that she loves him, and to stop it. Bethenny dares her to tell Scott that he’s the love of her life, and she wants to be engaged by the end of the year. Sonja says, just call. Bethenny says she’s got nothing else, and Tinsley gets up. In her interview, Bethenny says she didn’t ask Tinsley to screw Scott in her apartment; just call him. Tinsley and LuAnn go out for a smoke. In Tinsley’s interview, she says when they get boyfriends, they can tell how to react to this. She tells LuAnn that Scott would kill her.

Bethenny tells Sonja that she’s never kissed a woman, but she can’t pass up a dare. In her interview, Tinsley knows they’d be giggling in the background, and Scott would be upset. She doesn’t want to make him mad. She goes back to the table, and Bethenny wonders why be friends if they can’t talk. Barbara says maybe Tinsley doesn’t want to be friends, and Dorinda accuses Barbara of instigating. Barbara says she’s sitting in the group; she’s not staying out of it. Make her. Dorinda fakes some boxing moves, and LuAnn says Barbara has a hammer. In Barbara’s interview, she says Dorinda has a vision to get her. She wonders what she did. LuAnn says she went to the bathroom, came back, and look what happened. Sonja says Barbara was being provocative, saying Tinsley didn’t want to be friends. Bethenny wants to clarify that it’s not Tinsley’s fault. She apologizes for striking a chord, but doesn’t know where the lines are. She doesn’t know what’s a bad thing to do. In her interview, Tinsley says they can all think whatever they want to think. Her relationship with Scott is delicate and tricky. He’s uncomfortable with her being in the spotlight as it is. She’ll be happy if she can get it to all fit together.

Bethenny says Tinsley doesn’t have to tell them anything. She knows it must be hard. Tinsley says it is. She’s trying to make it work every day, and it’s literally torture. Bethenny says Tinsley can’t just be happy when he is; that’s not how it works in life. Tinsley says that’s how it works in her life. In her interview, Bethenny says Tinsley sets women back a hundred years. Tinsley says she doesn’t know what to do; she’s doing the best she can. Dorinda hugs her, and she cries. Dorinda says they’re all going through stuff. In her interview, Dorinda asks, what is she afraid of? Fear shouldn’t be part of this thing called a relationship. Bethenny says she’s really sorry, but Tinsley doesn’t seem that happy. It seems like her relationship is in a box. Tinsley says Scott is different from everyone she’s dated. Bethenny asks if he’s controlling, and Tinsley admits he has some controlling ways. Bethenny says she’s a strong, beautiful woman. Does she need for him to be in control? Tinsley says it’s a juggling act. Every day there’s a new headache. Bethenny thinks she should be with someone who accepts her the way she is. Tinsley whines that she loves him. In Bethenny’s interview, she says Scott is driving the car, but she’s not sure Tinsley is even in the car. She hugs Tinsley, who cries some more. She says it seems like Tinsley is under pressure and stress. It doesn’t seem healthy or happy. She doesn’t have to let him drive. It works for his life, but not hers.

LuAnn says she’d also like to offer some advice. Take the truth, not the dare next time.

Next time, the group goes to the circus (like this isn’t enough of one), LuAnn asks if Ramona hooked up with Mario, Tinsley breaks up and makes up, Dorinda tells Ramona not to lie, and Ramona pushes Dorinda. That last one is probably a really bad idea.

👎 Honestly, this poor girl needs to move on. This is not the dude for her, and she’ll never be happy. She loves the limelight, and he hates her being in it? No. Just no. I think the pressure from Mama Dale doesn’t help either.

👑 A Hotline For the Throne…

This is too funny. Jimmy Kimmel set up a hotline for Game of Thrones questions.

⛳ About That Weekend…

I can see it in the distance.

April 16, 2019 – Willow Agrees To Help, Lois Is In Town, More Details, Eddie Makes an Arrest & Bunnygate


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Carly sees Michael at the hospital. She was supposed to meet Sonny there, but they had to reschedule. Michael says let him guess; Sonny is with Kristina.

Sam goes to the DOD house. She says Shiloh looks like she feels. He says he didn’t sleep, and asks if she’s seen her sister. She was going to ask him the same thing; no one has seen her. Shiloh says no one there has either. Sam says her mom hasn’t seen Kristina, and when they call her phone, it goes straight to voicemail. She knows she told him that Kristina can be a flake, but now she’s getting worried. Shiloh says they’ll find her together. They take care of their own at DOD.

At Charlie’s, Brad reads to Lucas from Shiloh’s book. All that matters is being present in the now. Doesn’t it blow his mind? Lucas says, mind blown. Brad doesn’t think he’s too enthusiastic, and Lucas says it’s just not his thing. Brad thinks they need to go to classes. It’s energized him. Lucas can see that, and Brad says there are courses for kids. They can sign up for a family seminar. They can bring Wiley. Shiloh loves him to pieces. Sitting at the bar, Willow overhears.

Valentin asks Nora how her visit has been, and she says, brief. Her case wrapped up already, and she’s headed for the train station. Valentin asks if she can stay put, but she says he’ll have to pay a retainer, and it’s gone up. He tells her to name her price. He needs her services again.

Nina walks into her office while on the phone, and finds Spencer in her chair. She asks what he’s doing there, and he asks if it isn’t unpleasant to have an unwanted trespasser in her sanctorum. He says that word is from the Latin. Nina says, get out of her chair; that’s from Nina. He has the same feeling as when he contemplates his exile from Spoon Island – his rightful home.

Franco sees Cameron sitting outside the principal’s office. He’s obviously been in a fight, and Franco asks, what happened?

Jason sees Elizabeth, and says he needs a favor. He shows her the cup, and asks if she can test the residue, no questions asked.  He wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important, but it’s family. The less Elizabeth knows, the better. Elizabeth says there’s a test that’s not the most precise, but it’s quick. Does he want to wait? He says he owes her one, and she takes the cup.

Michael tells Carly that he knows Kristina left DOD, but doesn’t know where she is. Jason joins them, and Carly tells him that Michael is asking about Kristina. Jason says he got her out before anything happened. That’s what Michael figured, but he wanted confirmation. Jason says, she’s in a safe place, but she’s pretty messed up.

Shiloh gives Sam a giant glass of water, and says he’s never seen her rattled like this. When they spoke this morning, she said there was nothing to worry about. She says Sonny hasn’t heard from Kristina either. It’s one thing for their mother, and Kristina’s sisters not to hear from her, but she’d never flake on Sonny. She thinks something is wrong, and Shiloh says they’ll find her together.

Brad tells Lucas that DOD has volunteer opportunities and workshops. Lucas says he’ll think about it. He agrees that Brad is less stressed; he’ll give him that. And he’s not popping antacids like he was. Lucas goes over to Willow, and says they met a few months ago. He introduces himself, and Brad says it’s crazy running into her there. He thought she was moving. She says her plans changed. She likes her life there too much, and doesn’t want to change it. Lucas says the need good teachers. She asks Brad if the book is good, and Lucas says he lives and dies by it. He’s a real believer. They leave, and Willow flashes back to Shiloh finding her, and saying he can always find her, even if she changes her name. She tells him she wants him to leave, but he says that’s not what he wants. She promised to never leave him, and she broke her promise.

Nora tells Valentin, it sounds like it’s of some urgency. Her calendar is full, but if he’s facing criminal prosecution, she can refer him to an excellent attorney in New York. He says it’s a family matter. She did a fantastic job when he was seeking custody of Charlotte. Nora thanks him, and understands he revised the agreement. He tells her that he and Lulu decided to share custody of Charlotte, for Charlotte’s sake. Nora says, mozel tov, reminding us that she’s Jewish, and Passover is soon. He says that Lulu has gone overseas indefinitely, without even a day’s notice.

Nina is sorry Spencer and Valentin are still at odds. She wishes they could make peace. He asks who she’s kidding. She’s part of it, and it’s on her to fix it. She asks how he’d like her do that, and he tells her, put a leash on Valentin; he’s her fiancé. Nina says he’s assuming she can control Valentin, and he asks what else marriage is good for. She says Valentin feels entitled, as does Spencer. She tells him, stop antagonizing Valentin and making him the enemy,

Cameron says his mom was supposed to come, but Franco says she’s at work, and he got the call. Does Cameron want to tell him how the fight started? Was it about a girl? It’s his shot to tell Franco before he hears it from the man. He’s just trying to help. Too late. The secretary asks them to come into the principal’s office. Franco tells Cameron, let’s get it over with.

Jason tells Michael that Kristina is physically away from DOD, but still connected emotionally. Sonny hired an expert to break the hold. Carly says they’re going to need family to show up, and Michael says he’ll be there. He asks how she is, and Jason says, angry. Carly adds, but safe. He knows how Sonny is. He’ll pull out all the stops to get her back. Michael says Shiloh will still be waiting, but Jason says he’s working an angle to take Shiloh down, and Sam is working another.

Sam suggests calling the cops, but Shiloh says she’s an adult, so they have to wait 24-hours before they can report her missing. He intends to find her before that. He has members out looking, and they can go to the hospital. Sam thinks she’ll do more good there, and Shiloh says, where Kristina isn’t? She says she can search Kristina’s room. Maybe she’ll find a clue. He’s not comfortable with that, and Sam asks if he doesn’t trust her. He does, but Kristina trusts them with her privacy. Sam doesn’t care if Kristina is in trouble. Shiloh agrees, saying it’s better to beg her forgiveness later, and find her now. He asks Daisy to help Sam search.

Jason explains that Sam is sending Shiloh off to search; then she’s going to search the DOD house. Carly says there has to be something there to use against Shiloh. Jason asks Michael if Willow gave him any insight. Michael says, he doesn’t think… and his phone rings. It’s Willow, who says she has to see him immediately about Shiloh.

Nora tells Valentin that Lulu’s departure was abrupt, but thinks when you’re attacked by a serial killer, you deserve a vacation. Valentin doesn’t disagree, but he’s not willing to send his daughter to Paris every two weeks. He’s the de facto custodial parent, and wants to amend the custody order. Nora asks him to clarify.

Spencer tells Nina that he wants to express his concern for Charlotte. He and Laura saw him at GH. Lulu is barely gone, and he wants to cut out Charlotte’s grandmother. Nina says he misunderstood, but he says they both know what Valentin is capable of. Take the blinders off, lady. Nina tells him, don’t lady her, and there’s a binding agreement. He says Lulu changed things when she went overseas, but Nina says Valentin has no problem with Charlotte seeing her grandmother, and will make it happen.

Franco brings Cameron to the hospital. Elizabeth asks, what happened? Franco says, good question, but Cameron’s not talking. Not to him or the principal. Elizabeth tells Cameron to wait for her in the examining room. Franco tells her neither one will say what happened, but the school has zero tolerance for fighting. They’ve both been suspended.

Jason tells Carly, Kristina was obviously drugged. He found her on the floor, with pillows all around. Carly says, he drugs them, and sleeps with them? and Jason says, that’s what it looks like. He found a cup lying next to her. It was metal, with engraving on the bottom; the same symbol some of Shiloh’s followers have tattooed on their backs. He took it to Elizabeth to have it analyzed. He wants to find proof that Shiloh is drugging his followers.

Sam tells Daisy that she’s got this, but Daisy says it’s what Shiloh wants. Nothing is as important as finding Kristina. Sam says they know she has her phone and wallet. She wonders what’s in Kristina’s drawers, and Daisy starts to go through them. Sam says it looks like most of her clothes are there. She must have left with a small bag. Daisy doesn’t get why Kristina left, and Sam says she doesn’t either. She was excited about her higher level of achievement. Daisy says, what a disappointment. It’s an honor to be chosen to be close to Shiloh. No one has ever changed their mind. They know what the consequences are. Sam asks, what consequences?

Michael meets Willow at Charlie’s. She’s glad he came quickly; she was afraid she’d change her mind. She’s willing to talk to Kristina, and share her experiences. Michael knows it’s not an easy decision, and Willow says she has one condition; non-negotiable. They can’t be anywhere near DOD or Shiloh. He asks if she doesn’t trust herself around him. Michael asks if she’s afraid he’ll get his hooks in her.

Shiloh sees Brad at the hospital, and asks how it’s going with Wiley and Lucas. Brad says, really good. He’s surprised Shiloh remembered him. Shiloh says their work together is significant. Every drop of water makes an ocean. Isn’t that from The Aristocats? Shiloh asks if he’s going to see Brad again, and Brad says he needs more Zen in his life. He wants to bring Wiley and Lucas. Shiloh says he shows a real aptitude, and Brad thanks him. He sees the cup in Brad’s hands, and I audibly gasp. He asks where Brad got it.

Nina tells Spencer that Charlotte loves Laura. Valentin won’t come between them. Spencer tells her to open her eyes. He needs her to get Valentin to back off. Nina says, back off who? and he says, him. Her knight in shining armor is blackmailing him.

Valentin ask Nora if Lulu can dictate that Laura get half-custody. Nora says, the short answer is no. She can express wishes, but has no legal ground. Valentin asks if there’s a legal avenue she can pursue, and again Nora says the short answer is no. They’d have to relitigate at that point, and then he can voice his own position. He says Lulu left without notice, and he wants to file for full legal custody.

Elizabeth tells Cameron, silence is not an option. He says he handled it. She doesn’t need to know what happened. It will only hurt her, Franco says she’s a strong person, and Cameron tells him, stay out of this. Elizabeth says, hey. He apologizes and asks if he can go, but Elizabeth says he’s not going anywhere until he comes clean. She’ll find out one way or the other. It’s better to find out from him. He says the reason he beat the crap out of Tyler was because he insulted Aiden, calling him a little fairy boy.

Carly asks what Jason thinks about the psychologist Sonny hired. He says he doesn’t like psychologists, and Carly says, still… Jason says he seems to know what he’s doing, but he doesn’t see how he can get through to Kristina. Carly asks how Kristina was, and Jason says, she was pretty out of it, but okay. It was good because she didn’t fight him, and gave him the code to her phone. Until she woke up. Then she was furious. He can’t say he blames her; he did kidnap her. Carly says, for her own good. He says it would help to get hard evidence against Shiloh to give to the cops. Carly is surprised he wants to work with the cops. He says he wants to make Shiloh disappear, but it’s best for Kristina if he goes to prison. She’ll see he’s a con, and it will break his hold once and for all.

Brad tells Shiloh the cup is something he has to test; why? Shiloh says, it’s his. It has special meaning, and went missing from DOD. He asks what it’s being tested for, and I yell at Brad to shut up, but he says, for drugs. Shiloh says he doesn’t now how anybody got it, but it’s someone who wants to discredit DOD and see it fail. Brad wonder why anyone would want that, and Shiloh says, some people don’t understand, and others want to see it fail for more personal reasons. Jason is so obsessed with his ex, he attacked Shiloh. Brad says it was given to him by a nurse close to Jason. Maybe he stole it, and convinced her to run the test. It’s amazing the lengths people will go to. Shiloh says, especially Jason.

Sam asks Daisy what the consequences are for walking away from the Trust. Daisy asks where she heard that term, and Sam says, Kristina maybe. Daisy tells her, forget it. The only people who are supposed to know the name, are a part of it. Sam asks what would happen if she mentioned it to Shiloh. Would she be shunned? Is that what Kristina is afraid of? Daisy says, Shiloh would never shun anyone, especially Kristina. She’s so important to him.

Willow tells Michael if Shiloh was planning on bringing Kristina into the Trust, he’ll be watching her closely. He says her family got there first; she’s with them. Willow says, Shiloh won’t let her go so easily. He stays with you. He’s still in her head now, no matter how many miles are between them.

Carly thinks getting Shiloh out of the way is the obvious solution, but Jason says Kristina is Sonny’s daughter and Sam’s sister. They should decide how to handle it. Carly says they’re too close to this. They’re not seeing Kristina clearly. They assume she can’t handle what’s happening. They’re really undermining her. They don’t have confidence in her, so she has none in herself, and pinballs from thing to thing, trying to find where she fits. Jason says, what if Shiloh disappears, and she breaks down completely? Carly doesn’t know, and he says that’s why they have to let Sonny and Sam decide. Carly says she’s just tired, and thanks him for letting her vent. He tells her, stay there.

Nina asks Spencer how Valentin could be blackmailing him. Spencer says Valentin wants him to tell his grandmother that Charlotte doesn’t want to visit her, but there’s nothing further from the truth. Valentin comes into the reception area, and listens. Nina says she didn’t realize Spencer and Charlotte were friends. Spencer says Valentin wants to cut his grandmother out of Charlotte’s life, and if he doesn’t cooperate, Valentin will sic the Feds on him. Nina says, the FBI? Spencer says Valentin will stop at nothing to get what he wants. He asks her to have a heart. Make Valentin leave him alone. Nina says, give it up. Tell his story to someone else. She saves her pity save for the actual helpless, and he’s anything but. He tells her that she’s a worthy adversary, and worthy of respect. It’s too bad Valentin doesn’t have any for her. If he did, he wouldn’t be keeping a secret with Sasha.

Cameron tells Elizabeth and Franco that Tyler and his friend kept looking at him, laughing. He asked what was up, and they said, nothing. He was about to leave, and Tyler said his sister told him all about Aiden. Elizabeth says, what about him? and Cameron tells her that she said he’s a little fairy boy. Tyler called him Gayden, so Cameron jumped him. They got hauled to the principal’s office, but Tyler won’t be running his mouth anymore. That lying piece of crap. Aiden is a little kid; he’s not like that.

Jason gives Carly a smoothie. She tells him that she’s going to turn into an orange. He tells her as long as she takes care of herself and the baby, he doesn’t care. She says it’s her other baby she’s worried about. Oscar had another seizure. Josslyn was with him. He’s sweet and romantic, and got Josslyn a digital watch. There’s a superstition that at 11:11, someone that you love who has died is reaching out to you. She guesses it’s a way to stay connected. She doesn’t know if she believes it, but they do. They played music, and were dancing, when Oscar collapsed.

Elizabeth says Cameron knows better than to solve problems by fighting. He’s not going to let that tool call his brother fairy boy. How can he say Aiden is gay; he’s a little kid. Franco wonders if the real problem is that he doesn’t want it to be true. Elizabeth says he’s not like the other kids his age. Cameron asks, why? Because he likes Princess Calinda and baking? Elizabeth says, none of those things alone or together would prove that conclusion, but it’s not their job to impose a label on him. It’s their job to love and support him, no matte who he grows up to be. Cameron says, right now, he’s in the third grade, but his classmates have siblings. Unless they’re going door to door, he has to do something. Do they just expect him to take it? Franco says, you bet, and Cameron asks if Aiden can’t be a little less gay.

Nina asks Spencer what’s going on with Sasha and Valentin. Valentin comes in and asks if someone said his name. Spencer says he was telling Nina about when Sasha interrupted them at Windymere. Something shady was going on. Valentin says they were just talking about people. Would Spencer like it if Valentin talked about him?

Brad tells Shiloh, if he doesn’t do something, Jason will keep coming after him. He should have Jason arrested for theft. Shiloh feigns concern that Brad and Jason’s friend will be implicated as accomplices. He says there was only tea in the cup. Just tell Jason, and that will be that. Lucas comes by, and Shiloh says they’ll talk later, and jets. Lucas tells Brad that he’s off tonight. Any chance Brad can knock off early too?

Daisy tells Sam that they’ve gone through everything; there’s nothing there. Sam asks if Daisy has any clue what Kristina might have been feeling. Daisy says, she was excited. Kristina knew it was a privilege. Sam says, maybe the privilege was too much, but Daisy says, Kristina knew what it meant. If she hadn’t been fully committed, she wouldn’t have made the pledge. Sam asks what the pledge is exactly. Daisy says, if Sam is fully committed, one day she’ll be chosen, and find out.

Michael tells Willow, it doesn’t sound like having sex with Shiloh is a choice, but expected. She went through the ceremony, and at the end he had sex with her; that’s coercion. She says he didn’t force himself on her, but offered her a place in the Trust, saying it was an honor. That’s how everyone treated it, even her mother. Her mother convinced her that she was special. It wasn’t until she went to school that she realized DOD was built on lies, and Shiloh was just a con man. He was her first; the only man she’d been with, and he used her. Michael says, her baby was Shiloh’s, wasn’t it? and she says, yes.

Carly tells Jason, Josslyn called the paramedics, and went with Oscar. Jason asks how he is now, and Carly says, breathing on his own, and awake, but he only has a few days at most. Josslyn is with him, and wants to be until the end. It’s taking everything not to park herself there, but she can’t do that. She has to wait until Josslyn says she needs her, and keep herself busy. Jason suggests they shoot pool, and she says, don’t tempt her. He needs to bust Shiloh. Nothing is more important than her and Josslyn. He tells her, just call him when she needs him. She promises, and they hug.

Elizabeth says, no one is asking Aiden to be anything other than who he is. Franco says this isn’t about making Cameron’s life easier. Is he upset about the kids talking trash about Aiden, or about who Aiden is? Cameron says he doesn’t want to deal with Aiden being teased; he loves his brother. Franco tells him, prove it by his support. He could have saved a lot of pain if he’d stepped up to the plate. Franco leaves, and Cameron says, he’s wrong about everything. Elizabeth says, he’s angry, and so is she. Cameron is angry and upset on his own behalf, not his brother’s. She leaves, and Cameron pounds the wall.

Spencer tells Valentin not to be hasty. Valentin says he wanted the truth. His phone rings, and Nora says she’s tracking a case that she thinks might prove useful. He thanks her for her quick action, but it’s not necessary. He’s not pursuing reviving the custody agreement. He’s sorry for the trouble. She says, it’s no trouble; he’ll get her bill. Valentin tells Spencer this is the last of his patience. Spencer isn’t getting another chance. Go. Spencer runs out. Nina asks if he really blackmailed Spencer, and Valentin says, he’s a kid. It was just leverage to guarantee the truth. Sasha tells him, don’t count on it. Spencer will do anything to make him look bad. Was there something going on with Sasha? He says he offered Sasha money to join her in New York, but Sasha said no. Nina says, she’s a proud woman, but Valentin says, not as proud as her mother.

Brad brings the cup back to Elizabeth, who’s talking to Jason. He says he ran the test. Jason asks what he’s talking about, and Brad says, the results are back. There were no drugs; nothing. Just tea and Valerian root. By the look on his face, Jason doesn’t believe it.

Shiloh comes back to DOD. Sam asks if he found Kristina. He says he checked GH and Mercy, but she wasn’t there. He thinks he knows what happened though. He thinks Jason kidnapped her.

Brad looks full of himself.  Lucas tells Brad that his paperwork is finished, and he’s heading out.  Brad says he was talking to Shiloh about taking the next class. How about it?

Willow tells Michael, as soon as she found out she was pregnant, she made her escape. She couldn’t let Shiloh find out. He’d mold his child into one of his blind followers. Michael is sorry, but glad she broke away. Shiloh got away, but she protected her baby and lost it. She says he has it wrong, but it’s her fault. She’s been lying to him. The baby didn’t die.

Franco tells Nina that they need to talk to their step-kids, Michael knows who Willow’s adoptive family is, and Jason asks Brad if he’s involved with DOD.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Returning to the show where I’ve started disliking people I used to like, or at least didn’t bother me. I’m still good with Denise though, and of course LVP can do no wrong.

Denise is getting ready to have Dorit over. She tells trainer Mikey that Dorit weighs an ounce, and probably won’t eat, but they have snacks. She makes some drinks, and says that Dorit has two little kids, so she could use a double. The seltzer sprays everywhere when she opens it, and she claims she’s not used to using it in her drinks. Dorit arrives and meets Eloise, In Denise’s interview, she says she liked Dorit right away. It was sweet of Dorit to invite her to the Bahamas, when Dorit only knew her a few seconds. There’s also a lot to talk about. She puts blankets on the couch so Dorit doesn’t sit on dog hair. Celebrities – they’re just like us! Denise is anyway.

They talk about how tight their schedules are. Dorit says she feels blessed, and adores her husband. Denise asks how long PK has known LVP, and Dorit says they go back to their London days. They’re close; like brother and sister. Denise asks if they’ve talked recently, and Dorit says, no. The last time they spoke was at Denise’s wedding. Dorit knows LVP cares for her, but believes the Radar Online article came from her, and that she then called TMZ. In her interview, Dorit says, if you have nothing to hide, why would you hide? Denise says she’s coming from a place where she was dragged through the mud, embarrassed, and felt like she needed to defend herself. In her interview, she says when she got divorced from Charlie, she would try to find out who was leaking things by telling them false information. If she saw it in print, they were out. She had to live in a bubble. Dorit wants to go back to trusting LVP, but Denise thinks it will take some time. They go outside to check out the beautiful view. Dorit asks how long they’ve lived there, and Denise says, just over a month. They wanted something simple, Zen, and peaceful. Dorit knows what she means.

Kyle sets up the place cards for Camille’s shower. She wants to make sure there’s no awkwardness. In Kyle’s interview, she says she wanted to throw Camille a shower because it’s an exciting time in Camille’s life, and she loves throwing showers. Seating is everything. She’s seen women come in early, and move place cards, so she’s got to watch out for those people, The last time she spoke to LVP, they had a big argument. Yay. We get to see some of that again. She wants the day to be special for Camille, and her OCD is in overdrive.

LVP’s kitchen is getting torn apart. Steven tells Ken – Giggy! – it’s too late to change his mind. LVP wonders what she was thinking. In her interview, she says she’s emotionally scattered. Everything is coming at her from all angles. She says, the last time she stood there, she was with a friend of hers, and we see another clip from the argument. She takes a couple of swings at the old kitchen with a hammer, and says, at least Kyle was only a bitch in the kitchen. If she’d followed LVP through the house, this might be more expensive. She’s looking forward to it being brighter; it was dark and depressing. She wants to make some tea, but finds a bottle of wine that’s preferable.

The corrupt Faye Resnick arrives, and asks Kyle if it’s okay to wear white. Kyle explains that it’s weddings where you shouldn’t wear white. I just shake my head, although I know someone who thought all guests were supposed to wear the same color at a wedding, not knowing that was only for the bridesmaids. Teddi says, it looks amazing, and asks if everyone’s coming. Kyle says she invited everyone. In her interview, Camille appreciates Kyle’s offer to throw her a bridal shower. It’s tough to move ahead, and she wasn’t sure if she’d find love again, but David made her believe in love again. LisaR says Erika texted that she’s in tour hell, and can’t make it.

At the rehearsal studio, Mikey says, they’re seven days away from… Erika says, greatness. Mikey says, that too, but their first show in Jersey. In Erika’s interview, she says it’s the final days of rehearsal. There’s no time for a social life, family life, or any other life but show life. She’ll catch Camille at the next wedding. Erika’s choreographer gives some notes. In her interview, Erika says, as a child, she had big dreams, but as you get married, have kids, get divorced and remarried, priorities change. Life takes a different path. When the road opened wide at age 35, she took advantage. We’re the masters of our own destiny. Follow your dreams, and have a kickass checkbook. While rehearsing, Erika gets a knee to the jaw, and I try not to laugh. Mikey asks if she’s okay. Erika says, no, but she doesn’t want to make it a big deal. She tells us, with live shows, anything can happen, but the show must go on. That’s the way it is. They do that circle thing, even though it’s kind of early for that. Doesn’t that come before an actual show?

LisaR tells everyone her mom Lois is in town, and we see a clip of LisaR greeting her. In her interview, LisaR says her mother is almost 91, so when she can spend time with her, every second count. Food and drink happens. Camille opens gifts, and gets a tiara, which she promptly puts on. Kyle thanks everyone for coming to celebrate Camille. She says they’ve had their ups and downs – we flash back to her calling Camille a liar – and she’s excited for her and David. They deserve happiness. Dorit tells Kyle she was with Kyle’s sister Kathy last night. In Kyle’s interview, she says one good thing about American Woman not being picked up, is she and her sisters are speaking again. Everything is good, and they’re having fun again. She traded one for the other. Camille asks where LVP is. In her interview, Camille says she’s disappointed LVP isn’t there. LVP doesn’t need to punish her. Kyle asks if she’s coming to the wedding. Everyone agrees that even when you’re having problems with people, you should show up. Are you kidding? With this crowd. Who wants to be eaten alive? Camille says LVP told her be strong when the same thing happened with her. Kyle thinks Camille should send a text saying LVP was missed. In LisaR’s interview, she thinks that’s being passive/aggressive, and Camille should say she’s hurt. Camille thanks everyone for helping her celebrate this special time in her life.

Kyle drives some weird little car to the Mediterranean market with Portia. In her interview, Kyle says she saw a guy driving what looked like a lux go cart. He says it was called a Vanderhaul, and she thought it would be a fun toy. Plus it was cheaper than a vintage Jag. She’s scared driving it though. At the market, she gives Portia her own basket. In her interview, she says, as a mom, she wants do everything for them, like her mom did. She tells Portia that she’s got this. There’s a problem when it comes to loading the car, since it doesn’t hold much. Kyle says it’s a fun car, but not functional. Don’t take it shopping unless you’re not hungry. She crams what she has in the car, and Portia has to sit on top of some of it.

LisaR, her daughters, and Lois go to a high-end spa. The doctor is surprised that Lois is 90. LisaR suggests an IV bag. In her interview, she says her mom is low maintenance. She’s never had a massage, a facial, or even a pimple. She’s kind of a freak of nature. Lois taught her; age is about attitude. If you feel young, you’ll be young. Nice try. She says Lois must think they’re crazy. Amelia says Harry is home watching the news on all their TVs. In LisaR’s interview, she says, since Harry came back from camping, the Kavanaugh hearings have everyone on edge. To see a woman being put in a vulnerable position, and being made fun of and not believed, is effed up. LisaR wants to try the infrared bed. In her interview, she says the purpose of the bed is… she doesn’t really know the effing purpose. The girls do cryotherapy, and scream the whole time. Not surprising, since it’s minus 140 degrees. When LisaR comes out, she says she’s like a new person. We could only hope. In her interview, she says this is probably all bullsh*t, but  she’ll buy it quicker than anyone.

In the car with Lois, LisaR says she’s buzzing, and could run a marathon. Too bad she’s not doing QVC today. Lois says she doesn’t watch it much; it’s boring. LisaR says, thanks a lot. They go to a restaurant, where there’s a private table, and the rest of the gang (minus LVP) gathers, along with some other friends. In Kyle’s interview, she says she loves when Lois visits. She’s hilarious. What woman this age travels, and is super cool and fun? How about Betty White? She says,  they don’t make them like her every day.  LisaR shows off her $5K tiny handbag. In her interview, she says she’s been low key with the big purse thing. She doesn’t spend a lot, but everyone wants a Hermes bag, especially where they live. They’re all superficial and effed up. Everyone talks among themselves. Denise says it’s surreal seeing LisaR’s girls, since hers are going to be that age soon. She wishes she could keep them young forever. The kids jet, since they have to get up early. What’s wrong with this picture?

Kyle asks Camille if she’s heard from LVP. Camille says she texted that she missed LVP at the shower, and LVP said she wasn’t invited. Kyle is like, what? and says, it’s such a joke. She didn’t leave a stone unturned, and shows Camille the message was delivered. She asks what Camille said, and Camille tells her that she said she didn’t know LVP wasn’t invited, and would have wanted her there. She shows Kyle the texts. In her interview, Kyle knows it’s not fun being honest with LVP, but can’t believe Camille just said she didn’t know. Lois thinks it’s bullsh*t. LisaR says she invited Harry, but it’s a big day politically because of the Kavanaugh hearings. Everything is changing. Camille says she has a different point of view. There’s not enough evidence. When you’re going up against something like that, you need to have witnesses lined up. She thinks if that happened, you would tell someone. Teddi doesn’t agree. Camille says you would tell your boyfriend or your parents. LisaR’s friend Robin says she was attacked in seventh grade, and never said anything. Camille says she was too, but she told people. LisaR says the woman told her husband, but Camille says that was years later. LisaR asks if Camille doesn’t believe her, and Camille says it’s a he said/she said situation. It pisses her off. LisaR says she’s not getting anything out of telling the world, and she’s a doctor. Camille asks if LisaR believes that anyone who holds a PhD is right. Teddi asks how Camille would feel if no one believed her. As usual, she asks stupid questions, since she came late to the party. Camille says that’s her priority. These are serious allegations, and she feels bad for the judge and his family. LisaR thinks she would be more empathetic, and Camille says, she is, but she’s also been accused of things she hasn’t done. In her interview, Camille says when she was going through her divorce, she was maligned. We flash back to a reunion, where Andy runs down a list of insults hurled at Camille. Camille says it’s horrible to go through that when you’ve done good things. She empathizes with what the judge is going through, since she’s been in that position. She knows what it feels like to be wrongfully accused, and humiliated all over the world because of lies. In LisaR’s interview, she thinks Camille comparing herself to Kavanaugh is weird. It’s not about Camille; it’s about something much bigger. She tells Camille that he’s going to be a judge for the rest of his life; it’s a big thing. Kyle says her mother told her to never talk about religion, politics, or sex in a public setting, and wants to change it up. Dorit says it doesn’t sound like a discussion about politics. LisaR thanks everyone for coming, and says this is for her mom. They all toast to Lois.

Kyle says, guess who’s there, and watching them. It’s her sister Kim. They wave to her downstairs, and Kim holds a menu in front of her face. We flash back to her returning the infamous bunny to LisaR at the reunion. Kyle goes downstairs, and Kim says, what are the odds?

Dorit asks LisaR how she feels about seeing Kim. LisaR says she’s fine with it. Kim is a human existing on the earth like she is. They wonder if Camille left, but she’s crying on the stairs. She tells Kyle that she doesn’t know why she’s so upset, but she’s been accused of things she’s never done. It’s horrible to be put in that position. Kyle says, it’s okay to have a difference of opinion. Camille asks her to be a bridesmaid, and Kyle says she’d love to. In Kyle’s interview, she says she never thought she’d be asked by Camille at the bottom of the stairs while she was crying. Camille goes back upstairs, and says she’s not going to make excuses for her opinions. LisaR asks if she hurt Camille’s feelings, and Camille says she’s been the victim of a smear campaign, and it hurts. LisaR sits next to her, and she cries on LisaR’s shoulder, which I find a tad hypocritical on LisaR’s part. Teddi tells Camille that he doesn’t have that power anymore. LisaR says she’s moving to a new life, and deserves it.

Kyles sister Kathy is there too, and Kyle wonders if life could get stranger. There are ten thousand restaurants, and by coincidence, they all picked the same one. She’s happy they’re on speaking terms. Kim congratulates Camille, as LisaR strides past her. In LisaR’s interview, she asks why she should give two sh*ts, and say hello. Out of sight, out of mind, and she’s not thinking of Kim. She tells Lois that she just walked by. Again, kind of hypocritical when she was just saying they were both humans, blah-blah-blah.

Back home, LisaR tells Lois that she’s stunning. LisaR is exhausted, with all these dogs. They went from one to three. Really? Three dogs is exhausting when you have all that money and can hawk dusters on QVC all night? Ugh. I like her less and less. Lois doesn’t know how she manages. LisaR asks what Lois thought about the dinner. She says it was wild. She never heard them talk about politics. LisaR says they usually don’t, but it’s timely. Women are now being honest about rape and sexual harassment, when they’ve been quiet a long time. Lois says she was lucky. She shouldn’t be here, and neither should LisaR. In her interview, LisaR says, years before she was born, her mother was attacked by someone she worked with. He picked her up at the bus stop, but instead of taking her home, drove down a deserted road. Lois says he had a hammer in one hand, and a knife in the other, and tried to rape and kill her, but the military police knew no one should be driving there, and followed him. They saved her that day. She was the first one where he went to jail. He was in prison for seven and a half years, and after he got out, became a serial killer, murdering sixteen to eighteen women. We see newspaper headlines about the Trailside Killer. Holy! Lois can’t remember what she told her. LisaR says Lois couldn’t smell anything, and had metal plates in her head, but told her a kid on the playground had hit her with a hammer. When Lois finally told her the truth (on WWHL, LisaR said she was eighteen when Lois gave her the real story), she was filled with sadness and empathy, but not just because it happened. Lois had stuffed her feelings. Lois says she didn’t want LisaR to grow up scared. LisaR thought Lois was overprotective, and Lisa never quite trusted people. She says she must have put out the energy that no one should screw with her. she’s one of the few people she knows who’s never been harassed or attacked. In LisaR’s interview, she says it takes courage to come forward. The least we can do is show them compassion. She tells Lois that she’s strong, and Lois says LisaR will probably live to be 105 or more.

Later this season, LVP opens her Vegas restaurant, Boy George performs, Erika performs, rock climbing happens, rosé all day happens, Brandi (blech) gets together with Denise, Camille’s wedding happens, Denise talks to LVP, Camille’s house burns down, and Camille and Denise argue. Geez. Maybe this show is getting too depressing.

🔎 For Love Of True Crime…

For more on the Trailside Killer, go here;

If Loving You Is Wrong

Lushion paces near Kelly’s hospital room, saying, dammit Kelly. The prosecutor (whose name I don’t remember and got tired of searching for) asks what he’s doing there. He says, guarding Kelly. She says that’s what she heard. She spoke with the doctor, and it turns out nothing is wrong with Kelly. Lushion says, that’s good, and the prosecutor says Kelly is getting escorted back to jail now. Lushion thinks she should talk to Kelly, but she says she has nothing to say. She asks if he didn’t see her press conference. He says they have mountains of evidence and she refuses to listen to reason. She says a jury of twelve will do that, and asks him to move. He steps aside, and two officers go in. I can’t believe how cool Lushion is being. The prosecutor asks what’s wrong with him; he needs to let this go. That girl is going down. She says he can leave now, and goes into Kelly’s room. She comes back out, and says, not so fast. He says, damn.

They have a problem. They don’t have the right key for the cuffs. The prosecutor tells Lushion to come back and uncuff her. He goes inside, and Kelly is in the bed. He’s confused, as we all are, but says… um, nothing. Kelly says she can’t go back. She wants to talk to Justice. Lushion says he’ll see what he can do, and tells her, stay strong. He uncuffs her, and says he’s working on this. He’ll see her soon. The officers come in, and I notice that, oddly, Kelly is wearing clothing underneath her hospital robe. The prosecutor tells Lushion, if she didn’t know better, she’d think something improper was going on. He says if he didn’t know better, he’d think she didn’t want justice. She says she does; justice for Travis. He was the victim. She’s talking the truth, and Lushion says, the truth is, she wants to be reelected. She sits on her ivory throne, and is so busy, she won’t take the time to see how wrong this is. If she did, she’d see they have evidence that Travis was stalking Kelly, but all she cares about is a win. She could care less about putting a good woman in jail for life. She says she’s not. She wants the death penalty.

Esperanza comes to Larry’s office. She wants to find a legal way to get her ex to leave her alone. Larry says, don’t they all. Tell him more. She says he’s harassing her at work, and threatens every person she tries to date; they’re scared to be around her. He’s making her life a living hell. Larry suggests a restraining order, but she says they work in the same building. Larry says they can get him fired for sexual harassment. She says they have a daughter together. She doesn’t want to go that route. She just wants to find a way to get him to leave her alone. Larry asks what route she wants to take. Esperanza says there are certain things she knows; dates, times, and dirty deeds he’s done. Larry says, tell him more, but she doesn’t want do that. He asks how she wants him to do that if she won’t tell him anything? She asks if Larry can hire someone to kill him. Larry says he can’t do that, and wouldn’t advise it. She says she was kidding. He doesn’t think so, but says, so was he. She doesn’t want to ruin his life, but Larry says, some people’s lives should be ruined. She doesn’t want a restraining order, or to file charges, and she doesn’t want to kill him. Larry doesn’t know how to help. Esperanza wants to threaten to take sole custody of their daughter if he doesn’t leave her alone. Larry says, if he’s as bad as she says he is, a judge will be more than happy to consider that. She thinks it will make him calm down. Has she met Eddie? Larry thinks they can do that, and Esperanza says she wants to speak to him first. If he won’t listen, she’ll move forward. Larry is more than happy to help. She asks what it will cost, and Larry says, off record, getting even with him is fine. Esperanza asks if he had a bad experience, and Larry says, he did, but he loved it. It was like rocket fuel for him. Esperanza leaves. Larry laughs, and makes notes.

Randal stomps into his house. He makes a drink, and nods to himself. He calls Marcie. She answers, what? like I do when I’m pissed at the caller. He says she thinks she’s so damn smart. She tells him, don’t call again, but he says he will. She thinks she’s smart. She says he made her lose the baby. She’s trying not to think about the pain he caused. She’s concentrating on work and moving on. She thinks this is smart actually. Randal loses it, and she says she’s past dealing with him. He asks if she’s going to run and tell Brad, and she says maybe she’ll send him to kick Randal’s ass again. Ha-ha! Randal says, yawn. He’s going to get even. She says, you do that.

Macie calls Brad, who asks how she is. She says she’d be better if she could get Randal to stop calling. Brad calls him an, indolent prick, which sounds nearly posh with his accent. Marcie asks if Alex signed the papers, and Brad says, not yet. She wanted a lawyer go over them. Marcie says, it’s probably for the best. If there’s no counsel, she could contest it, like Randal. She says there’s nothing she can do about it – except find a drug addict to kill him. Maybe Wyatt (HAHN) could use a job. Brad says she doesn’t want to end up in Kelly’s shoes; try and let it go. She says she’s trying; Randal isn’t. She wishes they could move away to another town. He does too, but the kids are there. She says she’ll be home at seven, and he asks if she’d like to go out to eat. She says she’d like that, and he says he’ll see her then.

Tanya sleeps on the couch. Ben sits in a nearby chair. She wakes, and says she slept a long time. He asks how she feels, and she says, better. How bad was it? He says, not that bad, and she says, don’t lie. He asks how much she remembers. She says she remembers being cold, and the neighbor, the psychologist. He came to the house; it was weird. She doesn’t want to talk to him again – ever. She wonders if everybody’s going to be looking at her like she’s insane. He says, they seem like nice people, but she says, so did the last ones. He says, that was different. She doesn’t like being stared at. She’s alone, in a new place. Ben suggests they get to know their new neighbors. Alex seems nice, and Natalie from down the street. Tanya says, not today. He asks what she’s going to do, and she thinks she’ll finish her book. He thinks that’s a good idea, and she says, she’ll make him lunch. He says, perfect. She apologizes, and he sits next to her. He says, don’t, and she asks why he stays with her. He says because he loves her. She gives him all he needs. She says she can’t give him a child, and he asks if that’s why she stopped taking her meds. She says she can’t have a baby, but she wants one. He says she can’t stop taking her meds. She insists she was fine until Randal talked to her. He says she thought she was fine. She swears she was, but he tells her, don’t do it again. After they get settled in, they’ll talk about adoption or a surrogate. She says they can’t afford one, but he says they’ll work toward it. She’s all the family he needs. He loves her. She says she loves him too, and he tells her, she’s going to be okay, and holds her. For a moment there, I thought I was watching a Tennessee Williams play.

Natalie calls Marcie to check on her. Marcie say she’s been having a hard time since she lost the baby. Natalie is sorry, and Marcie says she’s been through it before. At least she’s divorced. Natalie congratulates her, and Marcie asks how Kelly is doing. Natalie says, she’s better. Marcie says, no man is worth taking your life, and Natalie adds, especially a sorry ass loser. Marcie says Natalie’s got a good one. Natalie agrees, and says she’ll kill a bitch to protect him. She asks if the police talked to Marcie, and Marcie says, no. Natalie wonders why, and Marcie says, no proof, and if they do show up, Larry will handle it. Brad comes in with flowers, and Marcie says she’ll call Natalie back. She ask Brad, why? and he says she deserves them. She has a few more calls, and he asks if she can make them from the car. He has a surprise. They’re going somewhere nice. It’s their first official date. She says she’s ready, and they leave.

Sitting on the front porch, Randal looks at Tanya and Ben’s house with binoculars. Natalie sees him, and walks up to the porch, startling him when he sees her magnified. She asks what he’s doing, and he says, looking in the house. She says she’s going to tell Tanya’s husband, and Randal says he’ll tell him that she’s ghetto as hell. Like this is a threat. She says she’s cut his ass before. Tanya is a woman alone, and she’s not well. Randal says Natalie isn’t well, and she says he’s crazy as hell. He says, damn right. Welcome to his world. She wishes his ass burned up in the fire. She tells him that it was her, but he says that’s too smart for her. She says, you only need cheese to catch a rat. Leave that woman alone. She’s telling her husband. Randal says, go. Tell him.

At the station, Esperanza tells Eddie that she needs to talk to him. He says that thing she’s doing with her mouth is talking, but she says, not here. Somewhere more civil. He says, her, him, and her bedroom works. She doesn’t want to argue, and tells him to focus. He looks at her butt, and says he’s focusing. She asks him to meet her for lunch, and he wonders if she’s going to poison him. She says she has something to scare him, but he says there’s nothing scary about her unless she’s in between waxes. She says she’ll text him the restaurant. He says he’ll be there.

Ben leaves the house, and I wonder why Natalie didn’t go straight over there. He knocks on Randal’s door. Randal asks how his wife is, and Ben says, good. She said Randal talked to her. He asks what Randal talked about, and Randal says, the neighborhood. Ben asks if that’s it. Randal asks what she said. Ben says she has a mental illness, and Randal says he picked up on that. It’s a shame. Ben says, yes it is. They’re new in the neighborhood, and Randal can do them a favor by not talking to her. Randal says, that’s a little rude, and Ben says, yeah, but necessary. Randal says, okay. He won’t say anything, but she’s going to have another break. Ben says, she just needs to take her meds. Randal says, what if she doesn’t? and reminds Ben that he helped Tanya. Ben appreciates it, but says, don’t talk to her again. Randal asks if he’s the jealous kind, and Ben says, no; the loving kind. Randal laughs, and says, isn’t that cute? Ben tells Randal, have a nice day. When he’s gone, Randal stomps out of his house, and walks over to Alex’s, saying, no rest for him. He’ll make that crazy bitch even crazier.

Randal knocks on Alex’s door, and she lets him in. He says she looks good, and she says this is about the baby. He says, RJ, and she says, his name is Brad. He says they’ll talk about that, and she says they have a few things they need to talk about. She asks if he’s been drinking; that’s one deal breaker. He can’t drink when he comes over. He asks who the hell she thinks she is, setting ground rules. She says, please don’t drink, okay? He says, all right, and asks where the baby is. Alex says, upstairs, and he says, in the bedroom? practically wiggling his eyebrows. Alex says he’s here to see the baby; that’s is it. She needs to talk to him about the baby. She thinks there was a mix up at the lab, and wants another DNA test. He says she told him the doctor switched the results. Alex says, she didn’t. Randal says, then how did it come back that it wasn’t his kid. She doesn’t know, and he tells her not to play with him. Is she trying to trick him? She says, not at all. He asks did she sleep with someone else? and she says, no. He wonders, why take another test?  She says she was doing research. There have been cases where a child came out with a recessive gene, and looks like the great-grandparent. Randal asks if she has Black great-grandparents. She doesn’t, and he asks, does Brad? She says, no, and he asks what the hell she’s talking about. She says she needs to be sure, and he says, no. He asks if she’s saying is that she was with someone else, but she says she wasn’t. He says she told him that he’s the only Black man she was ever with. If that’s true, she doesn’t need to take the test. She says, forget it, and asks if he wants to see the baby or not. He says he wants a real good look. Who was she with? The mailman? She says now he’s just being ridiculous. He says all this time alone here, and there have been no other men? She says he’s paranoid. Forget she brought it up. He says he’s still suing the doctor. Alex repeats, she didn’t do it, but he says no way the test should have come back as not his. She says, doesn’t he want to know what happened? He knows damn well it’s not Brad’s baby. Don’t let him find out it’s not his baby. Does she hear him? If she thinks he did something to her before, let him find out that’s not his baby. She asks if he wants to see him, and he says he wants to study him. His face, nose, feet, hands, and fingers. Alex says, fine, come see his son. I would so not be alone with this guy.

Eddie meets Esperanza at the restaurant. She already ordered his favorite. Eddie asks if she’s going to tell him she’s dying. She wishes he’d apologize, and he says he’s sorry she sent her boyfriend to beat him up. Esperanza says he’s not her boyfriend, and Eddie started everything. He says her opening her legs started it. She says she didn’t come here for this, and he asks why they’re here. She says they’ve been doing this way too long. She wants to find way they can be civil, and co-exist for their daughter. He says he is civil. She says he’s the most uncivil person she knows. When they met, he was completely different. He insists this is the way he’s always been. He played the good guy to get her to fall in love with him. She asks if he won’t consider changing for their daughter, and if he’s just going to continue using drugs, harassing her, and everyone she knows. He says if he ain’t happy, no one is going to be. She says she’s tried talking, giving him the benefit of the doubt; she’s tried everything. She wants sole custody.

Eddie tells her, get out of here, and Esperanza says she doesn’t want him around their daughter without supervision. She has a list of sh*t he’s done that she knows about. He says, she’s serious? She wants him to leave her alone. He says he’d never hurt their daughter. She says when done talking judge, nothing he has to say will matter. He thinks Steven put her up to this, and she asks if he’s crazy. He yells that he’d like a side of get this bitch out of my face. She slaps him, and says she’s tried everything. Now she’s threatening him. If she puts the list she has in front of a judge, he’ll never see his daughter again. He says he’ll put her in a box, and she says she’ll get a lawyer. He calls her a bitch again. She slaps him again, and asks if he’s dense in the head. Get prepared; she’s calling a lawyer. He says she can’t afford one, and she says, wrong. Larry will take the case.

He tells her to get out of his face. She says, gladly. She fishes in her purse, but can’t find her wallet. He laughs, and asks if anyone wants free p*ssy. She’ll do it for a burger. He suggests she call her boy toy. He tells her not to think of walking out; he’s an officer. She say she’s not stealing, and he asks if she thinks he won’t take her to jail. The manager comes over, and says, it’s okay. She comes there all the time. Eddie tells him to get his fat ass away, and Esperanza tells Eddie to stop. He grabs her, and cuffs her. He says he should have done this a long time ago. Don’t make him hit her for resisting. He tells the restaurant patrons, enjoy lunch.

Dr. Raston goes to Alex’s house. She tells Alex that she’s been calling. They need to talk. Alex invites her in. The doctor says she had to go to the Board, and tell them what Alex did. She’s also talking to a lawyer today. Alex is truly sorry. Dr. Raston says she reran the test. She thought Alex would like to know the result before Brad does. She hands Alex a manila envelope. Alex reads what’s inside, and says, oh my God. She and the doctor look at each other.

Next time, Dr. Raston knows Alex has another secret, Esperanza tells Kelly that Eddie is done, and Tanya threatens to call the police on Randal.


🐰 It’s Not About the Bunny…

For several reasons. It’s going to be Easter soon, it’s way late, and in case you came late to the party.



















April 11, 2019 – Oscar’s In the Home Stretch, Chip Chick, Runway Out, Three Wives Tales, Giggy! & Pet Day


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Alexis calls Sonny from Charlie’s. She asks where Kristina is, and when can she see her? Sonny says, she’s safe. When Jason got her, she was still knocked out by whatever they gave her. Alexis says, so much for DOD being the only people she can trust. Sonny hopes Kristina sees it that way. Alexis tells him to keep her posted. Julian comes by, and asks if she’s okay. She says she’s had better days. There’s a lot at stake. He asks if she’s referring to Kristina. She just bailed on work.

Jason looks at the text he just sent from Kristina’s phone. She wakes up, and he tells her, everything is okay. She’s fine. She asks, what happened? He says she was in a bad place, and he took her out.

Still in bed, Chase sees Willow’s tattoo. She says it doesn’t bother her anymore, but he says it bothers him. It’s like Shiloh branded her. She used to look at it that way, but now it’s just a tattoo. She’s free. They kiss. He asks if she knows what he wishes, and she says, that he could kiss it and make it better? He says, something like that, and she says he’s welcome to try.

Harmony asks Shiloh if he’s heard from Kristina. He says she hasn’t called, and his calls are going to voicemail. He has Daisy out looking for her. Harmony says maybe Kristina isn’t as devoted as he thought, but he insists, she is. He made sure of that. Sam walks in, and says she’s kind of embarrassed about last night. Shiloh says she had a moment, and moved through it. Instead of calling Jason, she reached out to him. Harmony asks if she’s spoken to Kristina this morning.

At the hospital, Sonny asks Josslyn how Oscar is doing. She says she and Carly are waiting for him to wake up. Sonny asks her to get something to eat for Carly at the cafeteria, and for herself. She needs to gain strength. When she’s gone, he asks Carly if there’s been an update in Oscar’s prognosis. Carly says he’s been taken off the ventilator. He can breathe on his own, but they don’t know if he’ll ever wake up.

Terry tells Drew and Kim, all they can do is keep Oscar comfortable and wait. The machine dings, and Kim asks if Oscar can hear her. He says, hi, and Terry tells him that they took the tube out, and it will be a while before his voice comes back. Don’t worry. Drew says Josslyn is outside, and asks if he should get her. Terry says she’d like a minute alone with Oscar. She wants to examine him, and run some simple tests without any distractions, happy though they may be. Kim tells Oscar that she loves him, and kisses his forehead.

Josslyn gives Carly a smoothie, and asks if there’s any chance she can see Oscar. Drew says, a pretty big one; he’s awake. Kim adds that he’s breathing on his own. Drew tells her about the tube, and says he can’t speak, but the good news is, he can’t cut her off. Josslyn says she’ll take full advantage of that. Drew tells her that she can’t go in just yet. Terry is running some tests. Kim leaves to call Julian, and Sonny says he’s going; they’re in his prayers. Carly says she’ll keep him posted. Josslyn tells Carly, it’s not over yet. She gets to see and talk to him again, and he can talk to her. Carly hugs her.

Willow asks Chase if it’s okay that she spent the night. She’s not sure about the etiquette. This is her first relationship. She asks if it’s too soon to call it that, but Chase says he definitely considers it a relationship. He’s happy she spent the night, and hopes there are many more. She says her too, and they kiss.

Julian tells Alexis that Oscar is finally awake, and he’s going to head over there. Molly comes in, and says she’s glad Alexis is there. Alexis is surprised, considering the location. Molly says it’s Kristina’s shift, and she was hoping for a truce. At least maybe they can agree to disagree about DOD. Alexis says Julian told her that Kristina isn’t coming in. She didn’t say why. Molly asks if Alexis has seen her, but Alexis says, nope. Kristina has ghosted her too. She’d love stay and chat, but she has a meeting. She tells Molly not to worry. Her sister will show up.

Sam tells Harmony that she hasn’t heard from Kristina, but she wasn’t expecting to. She asks if something is wrong, but Shiloh thinks they just got their wires crossed; it happens sometimes. Harmony asks Sam how Kristina seemed yesterday, and Sam says, great; the best she’s seen Kristina in a long time. She seemed happy and at peace. Why? Shiloh says he does a check-in every morning, and she missed it. It’s a first. Sam laughs, and says Kristina isn’t known for following rules. Shiloh says she’s been reliable, and Sam says, everyone has an off day. She wouldn’t worry. She’s sure Kristina will turn up.

Jason gives Kristina some water. She asks, what is this place? and he says, it’s a property. She says, a safe house? Why is she there? She says, omg. She was at DOD for her ceremony. He says, it never happened, and she asks what he did. He says he let himself in. She was in the attic, and he carried her out. She says he had no right. This is her choice. Shiloh honored her. Did Shiloh know he was there? He says, no, and she says Shiloh just thinks she ran off after he chose her. How could Jason do that to her?

Terry tells Drew and Kim that Oscar is sleeping; it’s normal. Josslyn wants to sit with him, but Drew says she needs to prepare herself. This last seizure took its toll. She tells him not to worry. She can handle anything. She leaves, and Terry says she believes her. Carly steps away to give them privacy, and Terry tells Drew and Kim that Monica asked to be included. They all leave to go somewhere more private.

Jason tells Kristina that she can’t leave. She asks if she’s a prisoner. He says Max and Milo are outside, and tells her to be mad at him, not them. He can’t let her go. She says he violated her rights, agency, and free will. He’s acting superior, and kidnapped her because he’s jealous of Shiloh. Sam sees the truth. Shiloh is enlightened, and he’s on a path to nowhere. He asks if she wants breakfast, and she says the only thing she wants is her freedom. He’s known her for her entire life. She thought he was the only person who would be fair to her. He says if it had been up to him, he would have taken her out weeks ago. She says he can’t do this; he has to let her go. He says she’s right about one thing. He’s known her for her entire life, and whenever possible, he’s kept her safe. Does she think he’d stop now? She scowls at him.

Michael comes by Chase’s apartment. Does no one call ahead? He was thinking about Willow told them regarding DOD. There has to be a way to close Shiloh down. Chase says he has to be careful. He can’t consider anything illegal. Michael wonders if they can’t come up with another sting. Willow comes out, wearing one of Chase’s T-Shirts. Michael says they can discuss it later, but Chase says he’s already there. They’ll think of an out-of-the-box way to trap Shiloh.

Sonny calls Jason, and asks if there were any problems. Jason says, no. Sam got Shiloh away, allowing him time to get Kristina’s phone. He found her in the attic, and carried her out. Sonny asks how he unlocked the phone, and Jason says Kristina gave him the password. She was pretty doped up. She didn’t realize what was happening. He texted Julian from her phone, and said she wasn’t coming in. Sonny says, so as far as Shiloh is concerned, she ran off on her own. He asks how she is now, and Jason says, understandably furious. Sonny walks into the safe house, and Kristina runs to him, crying. He says, it will be all right. She says she knows he thinks he’s trying help her, but he’s doing more harm than good. She thinks she’s better off at DOD. He has to take her back. She cries, and he holds her.

Terry tells Drew and Kim, the growth of the tumor has severely compromised Oscar’s mobility. His right side has been significantly weakened, and she’s concerned he’ll have trouble walking. Josslyn goes in to see Oscar. She takes his hand, and kisses it. Terry wants to make it clear; Oscar will not regain the ground he lost. In her experience, when this stage is reached, it progresses quickly. Oscar smiles, and thanks Josslyn. He says, sorry, and she says she forgives him – this time. Terry says, other than keeping Oscar comfortable, there’s nothing further they can do, medically speaking. Monica guesses it’s time to figure out what they’re going to do.

Monica says she’s made arrangements for Kim and Oscar to stay as long as they need to. They can come today. Kim thanks her, saying it’s generous. Monica says, it’s not generosity; it’s family. Drew says they’ll have to ask Oscar first, and Monica says, of course (🍷); no pressure. He may want to stay in his own room, or go to Mount Kilimanjaro. Drew says, he told her? Monica says, Oscar’s wishes are paramount. Kim guesses the first thing they need to do is talk to Oscar about the end of his life, and ask where he wants to live the rest of his days.

A now-dressed Willow hates to say it again, What Shiloh is doing is wrong, but he doesn’t break any laws. Michael says they need a new angle. What about the money? Willow says, the people who give him money consider it an honor. The more they give, the deeper they move into his Trust. Michael says, it implies coercion. If Kristina stops paying, she’ll be expelled. It’s extortion. Chase says, good luck proving it in court. Michael says they might have no way in, but they have something – Willow.

Sam apologizes to Shiloh again. Last night, she was kind of a mess, but she thinks she made a tiny breakthrough. Shiloh says, it was a significant breakthrough. Molly comes in. She sees Sam, and asks if she’s there to check on Kristina. Shiloh says she must be Molly, and she says, he’s Shiloh. The guy who’s not running a cult. Her sister called in sick. Molly asks if Shiloh can send one of his minions to get her. He says she’s not there, and Molly says she lives there, doesn’t she? If she’s not at work, and not home, where is she? Sam says, she could be anywhere. There are a lot of other options. Molly asks if she’s not worried, and Sam says, not yet. Shiloh explains that Sam is one of his students, and Molly asks if she’s completely lost her mind.

Sonny tells Kristina that she knows he loves her, and because he loves her, he’s keeping her there. He’s keeping her safe, and she’s not going back. Kristina starts yelling, saying, he can’t do this; he has no right. He says he has every right to protect his daughter from a predator. Kristina says Shiloh understands her in a way he never could. Sonny says Shiloh is using her. She wants to talk to her mother. She knows about the law, and he’s breaking it. He says he’s broken worse. There’s a knock at the door. It’s Alexis. Sonny tells Kristina, go ahead. Talk.

Josslyn reads The Wind in the Willows out loud to Oscar, while Drew and Kim watch. Kim tells Josslyn that she’s an entertaining reader. Josslyn says, it helps having a captive audience. Drew asks for parent/son time, and Josslyn says she’ll be outside. Kim says Oscar must be tired. He is, but he doesn’t know why. All he’s been doing is sleeping. Kim tells him that they talked to Terry. The tumor is growing rapidly, which is why he’s not as strong on his right side after the last seizure. As time goes on, he’ll probably have more seizures like this. Oscar, says, okay. He guesses this means he’s finally in the home stretch. This is it. He’s really dying. Kim calls him beautiful boy, and cries, as she touches his face.

Kristina asks if Alexis went along with this. Alexis says it wasn’t her first choice. Kristina says she’s an adult. She’ll press charges, and get Alexis disbarred. Alexis says when she gets out, do that. It will be worth it. Kristina asks why they’re afraid of people who are kind, generous, and loving. Alexis says they behave falsely to lure in impressionable young people. Kristina suggests Alexis just call her stupid, but Alexis says she’s not stupid. There’s a knock at the door, and Kristina asks if everyone was invited to this kidnapping. Someone help her. Sonny opens the door, and Alexis says, Neil. Sonny says they know each other? Alexis says, you could say that. He’s her therapist.

Molly says Sam has fallen for this guy’s act. Sam says she’s investigated Shiloh, and while he has questionable things in his past, everything if legit. Molly tells Shiloh, he is good to get Sam to fall for his act. What it is, is a front. She read his book. It’s derivative, some of it is plagiarized, and the author is a textbook narcissist. Sam tells Shiloh, sorry, but Molly says don’t apologize for her. Good luck with her enlightenment. She walks out, and Sam follows her. She tells Molly to listen to her. Molly says, this place is a cult. They’re getting people to open up about their lives, and she wonders what they’re doing with the information. In the meantime, they’re taking money, and getting in between the followers and their families. Sam says nothing is going to get between her and Kristina. Molly says she’s not losing both sisters to Shiloh. She leaves, and Sam smiles.

Michael says Willow can meet Shiloh in public; she knows his tricks. She asks, then what? Record it? Shiloh is too smart to say anything incriminating. Chase says he’s seen the games Shiloh plays. He finds Shiloh manipulative, creepy, and unsettling – and he carries a weapon. He’ll help if they can come up with a decent plan that won’t put Willow near that guy. Michael says, what if she didn’t have to go near Shiloh?

Josslyn tells Carly that she can’t believe Oscar never read The Wind in the Willows when he was a kid. Carly says she didn’t either. Jax got it for Josslyn because his mom read it to him. Josslyn knows Oscar will love it; it’s an awesome book. Carly missed out. Monica approaches, saying Drew and Kim wanted them to have an update. The tumor is progressing. They’re going to keep Oscar as comfortable as possible, and hopefully he’ll have a few more alert days. Josslyn says, days. Monica says, the time is very short, and Josslyn asks if he’ll have to die there. Oscar probably won’t say anything, but it’s not what he wants. Monica says she doesn’t think so either. His parents are talking options as they speak. Carly thanks her. She leaves, and Josslyn says maybe they’ll have time to finish the book. She cries in Carly’s arms.

Michael thinks Kristina might listen if Willow talks to her alone. Willow says, members are taught that doubters are weak and less evolved. Michael says he’s done everything he can. Kristina needs to know the truth, and Willow might be the one person she’ll accept it from.

Kristina says, priceless. Her father accidentally hired her mother’s therapist to deprogram her from an imaginary cult. Nice to meet their accomplice in a federal crime. Alexis says Kristina doesn’t know everything. Neil tells Kristina that she can call him Neil, but she says she’s not doing that. He should cure her parents. They need his services more than she does. They’re keeping her here against her will. Neil says they think she’s in danger, but Kristina says they don’t want her to find peace. Neil says, all good parents want that for their kids. Kristina doesn’t care what they want. DOD is her new family. Neil asks, how so? and Kristina says she’s not doing this. It’s wasting time. She walks out of the room. Alexis says, please tell her that Kristina isn’t going out the back door, and Sonny says, Max and Milo are outside. There’s no way to get out. Alexis says, so Neil is here, and Neil says, it looks that way. He thought she said it was a bad idea, and she says she did, but Sonny ignored her advice. What a surprise. Sonny asks, what happens next? Neil says this makes his work harder, but Sonny says if Kristina had left on her own, they wouldn’t need him. Neil says he usually works with people who have left on their own, and want to get better. If she returns to DOD, full of rage and betrayal, they’re not likely to see her again.

Carly wishes she could do something to make it easier. Josslyn says, it’s not supposed to be like this. But if loving Oscar means it’s going to hurt, bring it. It’s better than not loving him. Carly says she knows.

Drew tells Josslyn that Kim and Oscar are moving in with the Quartermaines to live as a family. Josslyn is welcome any time, all the time. She thanks him, and goes back in to see Oscar. Julian holds Kim. Drew sits with Monica, and she cries. Josslyn is glad Oscar is awake, and they can still talk. She was afraid she wouldn’t even get that. Oscar says, no way. She takes his hand, and says, one more question. What does he want to do with the rest of his life? She gets in the bed with him, and they cuddle.

Willow says she’d like to help. She can tell Kristina what she knows, but when Shiloh finds out – and he will… Michael says she’s afraid Shiloh will come after her. He understands, but there are two things he’d like her to consider; him and his father. He’s the CEO of ELQ, and has more connections and resources than Shiloh. He can protect her. His father is allegedly the most powerful crime boss, and controls the city. He has a long reach, and would do anything to protect the person who helps his daughter. He thanks her for considering it, and leaves. Chase tells her if she’s worried about provoking Shiloh, or that he might figure out she had his child, don’t do it. Michael is resourceful. He’ll find another way.

Shiloh throws his book across the room. Harmony runs in, and tells him, the cup is gone. She took it. If she shows it to the wrong people… Shiloh says, she’s loyal. Harmony hopes he’s right. If she didn’t take it, someone else did. It could be bad for them. He tells her, go find it. Just find it. And look for Kristina too. She’s too valuable for them to lose.

Jason looks at the cup with the tattoo symbol on it. Sam calls, and asks how Kristina is. He says, she’s pissed. Sonny and her mom are with her. She tells him Molly stopped by DOD, and she told her that she was taking classes there. She was looking for Kristina. Jason asks about Shiloh, and she says he asked about Kristina, but she acted casual. She thinks he believes Kristina left on her own. She told him that Kristina gets like this; she’s a flake. He seemed to buy it. Jason thinks it’s going to take a while to get Kristina to believe Shiloh is not a good guy.

Alexis can’t believe Neil is helping Sonny. Sonny says Kristina was already drugged, and was about to be tattooed and literally screwed. Neil tells them they can’t be arguing. If they need to, they should go outside and get it out of their systems. Kristina is going to work hard to manipulate them, and pit them against each other. They have to show a united front, no matter what throws at them.

Tomorrow, Valentin tells Spencer that the truth always comes out, Ava asks if Jordan thinks Ryan is dead, and Laura asks Finn if he thinks Ryan is dead.

🔎 I Spy…

GH alumni Brytni Sarpy (Valerie Spencer ) in a chip commercial.

✂ Tonight, on Project Runway, the challenge was the future of streetwear. What is that anyway? The same thing as the used vintage stuff I wore when I was in acting school? Kovid was out for a lack of cohesiveness, although I loved his vest with Steampunkish accents. He had also been in the bottom three about fifteen times, even though they were only on episode five. Oddly enough, the guy who’s cried his way through every episode, didn’t shed a tear.

🍵 Let Me Pour You Some Tea…

Despite a rougher year than most of us, Bethenny is looking good. And like Billy Crystal said as Ricardo Montalbán (SNL), it is better to look good than to feel good.

The hits just keep on comin’ for Vicki, but apparently, she’s still a Real Housewife.

And at least Shannon is still a size two or whatever.

The next best thing to Giggy getting his own spin-off.

💖 And While We’re On the Subject…

🐶 🐱 🐁 🐇 🐹 Happy National Pet Day! 🐤 🐠 🐎 🐷 🐍


GroupShot (2)

Casey-August26-2016 (3)

April 10, 2019 – The Kidnapping Commences, Summer Camp In the Berkshires, An Anniversary & Not Cracking


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

After skating, Willow and Chase go to this apartment. Willow asks if skating is going to be Chase’s new hobby. He doesn’t think so, but he loved it because he got to be with her. He tells her that he has something he hopes she’s into. He holds up a bottle, and says, behold. The most magical bottle of wine ever had. At least that’s what the guy at the wine store told him.

Finn says, it feels like May, but Anna is busy looking at her phone. He doesn’t mean to pry, but asks if there’s something about the picture Robin sent that’s concerning. She says she was just thinking about the people who are most precious to her, her daughter and grandchildren. It never occurred to her, what if they’re not…

Peter walks Maxie to her door, and says they have to plan their next date. She says that would imply they had one tonight. He asks if it doesn’t count, and she says only if he thought her spending most of the time with other people was a good date. In that case, they have a problem. He asks, what about tomorrow? and she says she’ll find a sitter. He says he’ll make a reservation. She asks is he staying or going? and he says, staying. She was hoping he’d say that.

On the phone in his office, Sonny tells Carly that he’ll be home soon, and he loves her too. He hears someone at the door, and grabs his gun. It’s Alexis, who says they have to talk. He says, Kristina? and she says, what else? She tells Sonny, he’s not going to kidnap her, and he says, whatever Shiloh is selling, Kristina is buying big time. She’s in deep, and they have to dig her out.

Kristina signs her pledge. Shiloh says, well done. She wants to make him proud by repaying him for everything he’s given her. He says she’s such a special person, and touches her face. He tells her, enjoy the ceremony. He leaves, but she calls him back. She doesn’t know… He says the ceremony will be as painless as possible. Does she trust him? She has nothing to be afraid of. She half-smiles.

Jason tells Sam that he wants to case the house first. Then he’ll grab Kristina, and get her the hell out of there. Sam says they have to make sure Shiloh is fully occupied somewhere else. Jason asks, how? She takes out her phone, and says, watch and learn.

Chase asks if Willow has been to the specialty wine store, but she says she’s too intimidated. He tells her that Stanley said – she interrupts, noting he’s on a first name basis with Stanley – the wine is from a little family-owned vineyard. He hesitates before quoting Stanley that it’s the vintage of love. She says, it must be some wine. They should toast. Chase asks, to what? and she says, to new adventures and magical vintages. They clink glasses.

Finn tells Anna that he doesn’t understand. She says, what if the unthinkable… He says, what? and she says, her sister. He says now she’s getting somewhere. She says what if she’s misinterpreted their relationship all these years? What if Alex despises her? Finn asks, why? Anna says what if she got to raise Alex’s child as her own? What if Robin is Alex’s, and not hers?

Peter remarks on how big James is getting, and Maxie can’t believe he’s going to be one. Peter says, it was a year ago next month. She says, he remembers that night? and he says, it’s hard to forget. James made a dramatic entrance. Maxie says she can never repay him, but he says she did the hard work. She says she never could have done it if he hadn’t been there. He’s glad he was, and she says, her too.

Alexis tells Sonny that their daughter is in big trouble. He says he’ll handle it, and she asks if he’s going to take Kristina kicking and screaming. He’ll make it worse. He asks how much worse it can get. She’s already in so deep, he doesn’t recognize her. Alexis says she talked to someone experienced in cults. They said not to force her. Plant seeds of doubt, encourage and nurture them to grow, until she comes to her own decision and leaves. Sonny asks if she got the advice from a gardener, and she says, no, a therapist. She has a new one.

Shiloh tells Kristina that she won’t be alone. The other Trust members will be with her. She still wishes he would be there, but he says it’s a step she needs to take on her own. She needs to own this; embrace this. He’ll be there after to welcome her into the family, but in the meantime, Harmony will be with her. Harmony comes in, and holds out a cup. She tells Kristina, drink it. It will calm her nerves.

Finn asks if Anna thinks the memory was having Robin. Walk him through this. Anna say she couldn’t see Robin much when she was little. Finn says, Robert couldn’t know he had a kid. She says she was still an agent, and should have gone to jail for treason. She visited Robin as much as possible, as a friend. Robin called her love. She was thinking, what if Alex gave birth, and for her own convoluted reason, had the memory implanted in her?

Maxie asks if Peter wants a nightcap, but he thinks he’s okay. She says she doesn’t have much in the way of food, but they could order out. He tells her everything he needs is standing in front of him. She says. that’s easy. They kiss, gaze into each other’s eyes, and kiss some more. Maxie starts unbuttoning his shirt, when James starts to cry. She can’t believe the timing, but Peter says he’ll be right there. He sits down, and sees a picture of Maxie and Nathan on the mantel.

Shiloh tells Kristina, time for reflection. She needs to make sure this is what she truly wants. She says she knows what she wants. If she seems anxious, it’s just because she’s excited, not scared. She doesn’t know why they can’t start now. Shiloh appreciates her enthusiasm, but tells her, for the sake of the others who come after her, use the time wisely and reflect. Harmony tells her, drink up, and she does. Shiloh arranges the pillows, and tells her to make herself comfortable. She lies down, and he says, think about how far she’s come. He’ll see her later. He and harmony leave. In the hallway, Shiloh tells Harmony, Kristina is clearly ready.

Sam calls Shiloh, who says it’s a nice surprise to hear from her. She hopes it’s not too late to call, but she doesn’t think she can make another session tomorrow. He says she seemed to enjoy the last one. Is she sure she’s okay. Is it Jason? She asks if she would sound unenlightened if she said yes, but he says she’d sound honest. She wants be with Jason, and doesn’t know if this can work. He asks where she is, and she says The Floating Rib, but he doesn’t have to come. He says he’s on his way. She hangs up, and tells Jason, and that is how it’s done. He says, yes it is. She needs to keep him at least a half hour. Can she do that? She says she needs him to get her sister out. Can he do that? He says he won’t leave the house without her.

At this point, my Word program suddenly decides it’s not responding. After waiting a beat to see if it will change it’s mind, I close it and reopen it. Since I don’t hit save every five seconds, only fifteen, it’s missing a paragraph. Since I haven’t slept this week, I decide it’s not worth it to hunt down the two minutes missing. Basically, Sam meets Shiloh outside The Floating Rib, and pretends to be somewhat drunk. He takes the beer bottle from her hand, and they go inside where he orders coffee.

Jason checks his phone; 10:10. He looks in the windows at DOD and sees the living room empty. He slips inside. He hears Harmony asking for help with Kristina’s ceremony. Shiloh pushed it up. it’s go time.

Chase tells Willow that he wants her, but only if she wants him. She says, yes. He asks if she’s sure, and she says she is. They get busy.

Finn thinks it’s crazy for Anna to work herself up for nothing. Robin is her daughter. Anna says she can’t say that with certainty. Look at Drew. Finn says, it’s not the same, but she says they were both parties to the experiment against their will. Drew had no idea his life was not his own, and could recall things that never happened. How does she know that’s not true for her too?

Peter looks at the picture of Maxie and Nathan. Maxie comes back, and says she thinks it was just a bad dream. One book and two songs made it all better. Peter thinks mom made all better. He says the picture makes him smile, and she says it has that effect on her too. She asks if it’s weird, talking about Nathan, when they just… He says, no, but he wasn’t married to him. Is it weird for her? She says, yes and no. She asks when life got so complicated, and he says, for him, at birth. She asks, what about his history? He’s sure she doesn’t want to talk about his father, and she says she means girls; particularly the ones he’s dated. He knows about her past, so it’s only fair she gets the 411 on his exes.

Sam tells Shiloh this place used to be called Jake’s. She and Jason played pool there all the time. She misses him. Shiloh asks if she misses who she was with him. She says, no, and he says, that’s a telling sign. She says give her enough time, and she can give him the bullet points on why they shouldn’t be together. He says it might serve as a reminder she’s on right path, and she asks how much time does he have?

Jason goes to attic, and finds Kristina. He asks if she can hear him. He sees the tattoo instruments, and says her name again.

Anna tells Finn, maybe Alex felt she couldn’t take care of Robin. Then Dr. Cabot did this deranged twin study, and Alex had the memories implanted in her. Finn says, that’s highly unlikely, and she says, but not impossible. Finn asks what the motivation would be. Alex hated her so much, she gave Anna her kid? Where’s the negative? Anna says Alex must have felt some relief. She couldn’t deal, and put the onus on her. Over the years, Anna got to love her and raise Robin as her daughter. Finn says Robin is her daughter. Anna says, now Alex is dropping hints. Finn asks, why now? and Anna says she doesn’t know. For some reason, Alex wants her to realize Robin is her daughter, and not Anna’s.

Peter hates to disappoint Maxie, but all of his relationships were relatively brief and uncomplicated. She asks if he’s ever been in love. He says no, but he’s looking forward to it. On that note, he thinks he should go. She asks, why? and he says he thinks it’s time to call it a night. She tells him James is a one and done kind of kid, but he says it’s not James. She asks, what then? and he says, her.

Chase and Willow bask in the afterglow. He asks if it was okay, and she says, more than okay. Perfect. He wants to make sure she’s all right. She says she had no idea it could feel like this, and the only reason she knows is because of him. They kiss.

Alexis tells Sonny that she’s worried his plan will make Kristina resent him. Sonny says, wrong. Kristina knows he’s the kind of person who takes action when things go bad. At the beginning, she might be mad, but she’ll realize. Alexis says he’s acting like she’ll be rational, and that’s not going to happen. He says, Kristina is still Kristina. She knows he’s not extreme unless the situation is that bad. She’ll realize she’s wrong. He asks if she thinks it’s better to wait and watch, but she doesn’t know. He says they’re getting her out of imminent danger and keeping her safe.

Sam says Shiloh has people who need and want him, including her sister. She can’t believe he has enough time to come out there and listen to her troubles. He tells her, DOD isn’t about one specific thing. Members have different purposes, and serve different roles. It’s up to her to decide what her role is. She asks if he’ll help her figure it out, and he says, of course. I know, let’s play a drinking game when anyone says, of course.

Jason checks Kristina’s pulse, and looks at the time. He picks Kristina up, and carries her out. I laugh because, even though I don’t think she’s that hefty, he struggles carrying her.

Finn tells Anna, let’s go home. It will make more sense in the morning. Anna says, it makes perfect sense now. This person she’s loved, and had the privilege of raising; who has her heart. What if Alex is trying to blow up her and Robin’s relationship? He says, what if it’s true? Would it change anything for her? She says, no. She loves Robin as if she was her own, and will until the day she dies, but how can she explain it to her? It will break her heart. She cries, and Finn holds her. I’m guessing this mom switch is where the storyline is going, but it seems like a sudden, huge leap to this conclusion. I also can’t figure out where Alex was dropping hints about it.

Maxie tells Peter that she wouldn’t have asked him to stay. Unless it’s him. He says there’s nothing he wants more. She doesn’t get it, and tells him, be honest. He says, of course, and I take a drink. He thinks maybe she’s trying to rush things; convincing herself she’s ready. if she is maybe tell tale sign not ready yet 100 okay m say she will be ready one day promise he’ll be waiting promise not like anyone else interested in she’s it take all the time she need he gives her a quick kiss and leaves she ponders looks at pic I’m disappointed

Alexis doesn’t like the idea, but tells Sonny, just get her out. He says, it’s happening tonight. Jason is getting her out now. She wonders why they were even discussing it, and he says she has to be on board. Kristina needs the both of them. She says, fantastic. Thanks for the update. Now she’s involved in a federal crime and could be disbarred. Sonny says if she doesn’t like what he does for a living, she shouldn’t have had a baby with him. She says, too late for that. He’s Kristina’s father; she’s her mother. He asks if she wants coffee, and she says, yes please. He tells her that he’s going to fix this.

Sam thanks Shiloh for listening to her, and he says, any time. She says she should probably get going. He offers to drive her home, since she can’t drive herself, but she says she can take an Uber. He’s already spent so much time helping her. He hopes he see her tomorrow, and he leaves.

Harmony says they’re ready to begin, but Kristina isn’t there. She looks around, puzzled, then panicked. She sends a text.

Shiloh’s phone dings. The text says, she’s gone.

Jason carries Kristina out. She starts to come to, and says, Jason? He tells her, it’s okay. He’s taking her somewhere safe.

Tomorrow, Michael says Kristina needs to know the truth, Jason tells Kristina that he took her from a bad place, and Terry says there’s nothing further they can do for Oscar.

The Real Housewives of New York City

We backtrack a little to the fish room argument. LuAnn says, Bethenny is coming tomorrow, but takes the nicest room. She gets to sleep with the swordfish. The other women laugh, and say she’s sleeping with the fishes. LuAnn gets up, and says, you take the fish room. She walks out, grumbling as she goes about being put in the effing fish room. In her interview, LuAnn is surprised they think it’s funny. She thought Dorinda would be more thoughtful. Since she was messed up last time, maybe put her in another room. We flash back to LuAnn’s hangover that weekend. Ramona asks if Bethenny is queen. She’s involved with someone else; how horrible can it be? Dorinda says, everyone handles grief differently. In Ramona’s interview, she wonders if Dorinda thinks Bethenny is in a bad place, so she gave her the room, or if she’s afraid of her. LuAnn asks the hotel guy for a room. At the table, the women agree it’s a scary room. They’re from NYC and think taxidermized fish are scary? Really? LuAnn comes back, and tells them, for her, it’s like the scene of the crime. She was wasted in that room. In her interview, Tinsley doesn’t think it’s a trigger. It’s just an excuse not to stay in the fish room. LuAnn says she’ll be staying at the hotel, but she’ll see them tomorrow. Sonja gets upset, and Ramona says she can’t do that. Dorinda says, let her do what she wants to do. Tinsley says she was originally supposed to be in that room, and offers LuAnn her room. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, LuAnn is quick to anger. She’s expected to hand over Bethenny’s room as a sign of loyalty to the crown. Tinsley says they all want to be together; she’ll take the room. LuAnn wants to keep the hotel room option open, just in case.

They go back to Bluestone Manor, and Ramona says, no more swordfish talk. Dorinda points out the head in the globe, aka the Grand Countess. LuAnn hopes that’s the only Countess losing her head this weekend. Tinsley unpacked already, and has to move her stuff, but she says, it’s not a big deal. Despite what needy Sonja has said, I think Tinsley probably makes a great guest. She’s only high maintenance with herself. In Sonja’s interview, she says, Dorinda is going out of her way, and it’s getting embarrassing. She wouldn’t do it. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, excuse me, Countess. I’ll just take my luggage. I’ll bow as I go out. She guesses they’re all serving LuAnn at this point. Tinsley says she isn’t in the fish room; Barbara is. In her interview, Dorinda says, she only has to do this for two days. Then she can explode in her cornfield. She tells the women, keep it down. The Countess is trying to sleep.

Yoga instructor Patrick arrives in the morning. He thinks the decorations are super cool. They transport him back to childhood. Dorinda says, that’s the idea. He sets up the mats. In her interview, LuAnn says yoga helps her breathe, be centered, get in touch with herself, and deal with life in general. Who knew that your mind doesn’t have to be occupied by when you can have your first drink in the morning? She gets downstairs first. Ramona and Sonja follow. Struggling, Sonja says this is why she doesn’t get on top anymore. In her interview, she says there have been more moans and groans in the class than she’s had in six months. Dorinda says LuAnn’s ass looks like two firm cherries. Forget LuAnn’s list. That’s the best selling point so far. Maybe I’ll take up yoga. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she’s having summer camp at Bluestone Manor, and she’s not even taking credit card payments. She tells everyone that they have to get going. Patrick says, namaste.

The ladies go to Ventfort Hall, an old Morgan estate. Dorinda thought Sonja would find it interesting. Sonja says it’s run down like her home too. Tour guide Richard greets them, and says, it’s a delight to have a relative. He gives a quick history. We find out that it was considered a cottage, and was built in 1983 by J.P. Morgan’s sister. He says, like the Roosevelts, there was a lot of intermarriage. In her interview, Sonja says, ancestry and history are important to the Morgans, since there are less of them as time goes on. In looking at this house, she’s worried about her townhouse. There’s history attached, and it’s banged up and beat up. She says the crest on the stained glass is like the one on her ring. Richard says she’s a proper Morgan then, and she says that’s what she’s been telling everyone. We flash back to the slipper incident, when Dorinda put Sonja down for wearing the Morgan crest. Richard shows them a room recreation, saying the couple slept in the same room, which was unusual for the time, but had twin beds. Sonja says she and her husband had their own rooms. She adds they’d still be together if things didn’t happen the way they did. In LuAnn’s interview, she says Sonja quickly reverted to Lady Morgan. There are some letters on a desk, and Ramona and Dorinda look through them. In her interview, Sonja says if everybody touches them, they eventually won’t make it. They should be under plexiglass. Truth! They will start to deteriorate over time from the oil and acid in people’s skin. In Ramona’s interview, she says when they first walked in, Sonja was fine. Now she’s in the Morgan zone, and she’s going to spiral down. Sonja says they don’t respect anything, and Ramona tells Dorinda that Sonja is going into the Morgan thing. She’s rambling, and Ramona is getting nervous. Dorinda goes to get Sonja, who’s still looking at things in the room. She tells Dorinda she has a similar trinket box. She’s trying to keep things for her kids. Dorinda says she has a fresh, new apartment, and Sonja says, it’s history. She needs to keep it for the kids. Ramona says, she’s lost in that world again. Dorinda says it’s not good. It’s not the way she wanted it to turn out. Sonja is still glad Dorinda brought her there.

The weather is beautiful, and Dorinda says for the first time, the women will understand why she loves Bluestone Manor. The pool is heated, and the weather is fantastic. Ramona says, the pool is delicious. Dorinda asks to talk to LuAnn. In her interview, Dorinda says she’s given the past year a lot of thought. She didn’t like what she or LuAnn said. She wants to discuss it, and get it behind them. She tells LuAnn that she wants to talk before Barbara gets there. She’s sorry for her behavior. She was hurt, but that’s no excuse, and it snowballed. She loves LuAnn like family. LuAnn misses that part of their relationship. Dorinda wants to go forward. It might not be now, but she wants peace. LuAnn appreciates her owning it. In LuAnn’s interview, she says it’s what she’s been waiting for, and it feels like there really is remorse. It finally feels like Dorinda is sincere. They hug. Dorinda says it’s time to be back where they used to be. She tells LuAnn to relax and enjoy the weekend.

Ramona asks LuAnn how it went, and if they’re in a better place. LuAnn says it was nice, and felt more real than anything they’ve said in six months. Ramona knows Dorinda missed their friendship. LuAnn tells Sonja it was heartfelt, so she can pull Barbara off of Dorinda. Sonja says Barbara meant nothing bad. She knows Barbara was coming from a good place.

Dorinda says the last time she saw Barbara, it was not great. In the spirit of good friendship and comradery, she’s invited her. Barbara marvels at the decorations on her way in. In her interview, she says she’s never seen decorations like this in her life. They’re over the top. It’s the perfect setting for a murder, and she hopes it’s not her. She tells Dorinda the house is huge, and asks how she cleans it. Dorinda says she doesn’t; she has people who do. Dorinda shows her around, and Barbara says it’s a gorgeous house. She wonders what the hell with the fish. It doesn’t exactly go. Dorinda says it’s a boy’s room. In her interview, Dorinda thinks Barbara is speaking like LuAnn’s puppet. She asks Barbara what she thinks of the $250K fish room. Barbara thinks the shark is scary, and Dorinda says it cost $12K.

Dorinda brings Barbara out to the pool. She says Ramona wouldn’t come unless the pool was heated. Sonja tells Barbara that LuAnn and Dorinda are getting along well. Barbara says she’s not unpacking, just in case. She got thrown out of Dorinda’s other house, so why wouldn’t she get thrown out of this one? She tells Sonja if she has to, she’ll call an Uber. Sonja tells her the phone service is not that great. She might be hitchhiking. On the sidelines, Ramona throws shade at Barbara’s fashion choices, and those boots have got to go. Dorinda says Barbara is showing her bellybutton. Even her daughter doesn’t do that. In her interview, Ramona says, Barbara is rough around the edges. Dorinda tells Ramona that Barbara doesn’t like the fish room. Sonja tells Barbara about LuAnn being upset about the room. She tells Barbara it’s an initiation thing. Barbara asks Dorinda why she got the fish room, and Dorinda says she showed up late. Last in, last choice. Sonja says, when swimming with the sharks, stay in the shark room. Fight sharks with sharks. Dorinda doesn’t want Barbara to be uncomfortable, and says she can call the hotel. Usually most people are appreciative. In her interview, she says she’s never seen such horrible manners. Sonja tells Barbara to let Dorinda calm down. LuAnn doesn’t need any drama.

In Bethenny’s interview, she says she had a nice time in Boston with a guy she’s been dating. She’s taken and given a punch or two in this house. We flash back to all that, and I’d totally forgotten about Carole. She says last year was the beginning of the end of a friendship. Let the games begin. She walks in, and there’s no one around. She says, it’s Halloween. Everyone is buried in some cemetery in the Berkshires. She finds them outside. Barbara says, thank God, and hugs her. Sonja says they chased everyone away. Barbara pours champagne. Bethenny says she got her period, and asks what the odds are of someone having a tampon in this cobweb of vaginas. Sonja asks Tinsley if there’s any rosé, and asks her to be their truffle pig. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she’s clearly the kid sister; the runt of the litter. She goes inside to look for wine. Dorinda greets Bethenny, who goes back in with Dorinda.

Bethenny tells Dorinda that last night, she went to see A Star is Born. She didn’t know it was about drug addiction, and the guy died for her. I guess she’s never seen the three previous versions, or absolutely anything about this one? She thought about the texts between her and Dennis during his last week. She was saying she can’t do this anymore, and he kept saying he missed her. She cried for an hour. She gets teary, saying she sat by herself in the theater crying. In her interview, she says it was a stupid thing to see the movie. Dorinda tells her that it was Dennis’s journey, and not for her to determine. It’s done, and she should live her best life with her daughter. She says it’s a lonely, but growing thing, and Bethenny can call her any time. Bethenny gives Dorinda a kit to make signs. Dorinda says, no one wants to be in the fish room. She tells Bethenny about LuAnn pulling the recovery card. Bethenny wonders why LuAnn would be talking negatively behind her back. In her interview, she says they went through an intervention, and she doesn’t feel like LuAnn owes her anything, but she has zero bandwidth for anything negative or catty.

Chef Art Smith arrives. Dorinda explains he’s repping for Adrian, the Bear Naked Chef. She thinks he came along to make sure Adrian’s apron stays on. Sonja says she’s never had meal cooked for her in the nude – that she paid for. Bethenny gripes to Sonja about LuAnn being negative. In Barbara’s interview, she says if they hadn’t stepped in, LuAnn would have lost everything that’s important to her. In Bethenny’s interview, she says LuAnn should still be in the rehab room that Bethenny paid for. She left two weeks early to do cabaret. She should worry about the room she’s supposed to be in. Sonja says LuAnn is being a diva. Ramona and LuAnn sample things in the kitchen. The food, not the naked chef. In Bethenny’s interview, she thinks Barbara is on the Jim Jones lawn. She’s been hypnotized by LuAnn. She would never do something like that. Barbara tells her that LuAnn is the same LuAnn. Bethenny says she was looking for the new Lu.

LuAnn greets Barbara, and asks how it’s going. LuAnn tells her about Dorinda coming to her. It’s the first time she acknowledged what she’d done, and it was heartfelt. She owned it. Outside, Dorinda talks to Bethenny, saying she felt badly about what LuAnn said. Bethenny says LuAnn never even talked to her about Dennis. She just talked about her cabaret. She always does. Apparently, she’s substituted that for the drinking. LuAnn asks if she’s interrupting, and Bethenny says, a little bit, and she goes back in. Dorinda laughs. She loves LuAnn, but she just doesn’t get it. Bethenny says, she doesn’t give a sh*t. In her interview, Bethenny says Dennis’s passing changed her. She’s chill. She’s not letting anything be heightened. Dorinda says LuAnn has no self-awareness. The minute she accepted that LuAnn isn’t harmful or hurtful, that it’s just who she is, it got better. Bethenny says she’s one of those friends you don’t go deep with.

The ladies check out the dining table. Barbara wants to sit at the head of table, but Ramona tells her that’s Dorinda’s seat. Barbara says she’s used to being the boss. In her interview, Ramona says, it’s not your house, bitch. Bethenny changes into pajamas, and the girls all gather in her bed, and Sonja babbles. In Bethenny’s interview, she says, Sonja peaks early. She’s in a contained environment. They’re safe, and all together in a house. Sonja says she’s busted out tonight. Whatever that means. I think it’s another euphemism for drunk. In her interview, LuAnn admits she loves drinking – we flash back to her falling into the bushes – but watching the others drinking is like watching a 3D movie without the goggles [sic]. She can’t comprehend it anymore. We flash back to Sonja trying to make out with Bethenny during a trip. Sonja starts talking about Bethenny’s jean line, and how she has big girl sizes. Ramona says the average girl is huge, and dances in the mirror. I wonder if she’s one of those people who thinks a size 8 is huge. In her interview, she says, get real. She’s hotter than hot. Maybe, but then she opens her mouth. Tinsley and Sonja chant, rosé all day. In Ramona’s interview, she says, Sonja can’t find a middle ground. She’s either all in or all out, and Ramona wishes she wouldn’t drink so much. She asks Sonja to pace herself, but Sonja says she doesn’t drink that much, so when she does, she does.

Tinsley says, thank God the Naked Chef has an apron. He asks Tinsley to round up the girls, and she yells, he’s naked! He does have a rockin’ bod. And tattoos. In her interview, Sonja says the hairy butt was a surprise, and isn’t sure how you sell that. Ramona says the hair on his body isn’t appealing. I have HDTV, where I can see every newscaster’s nose hair, and I have no idea what they’re seeing, but whatever. Tinsley says, food and naked doesn’t work for her – ever. I tend to agree, since I’m one person who does not like eating in bed. Bethenny likes him; he’s passionate. Just keep his balls away from her soup. Adrian pours drinks. Ramona says, no, when he gets to Sonja. In her interview, Ramona says she wants to keep Sonja in check. They thank Dorinda, and toast to her.

LuAnn tells Dorinda that she probably overreacted. Probably? Dude, you have not even gotten to the second step in AA. Dorinda says she hasn’t thought about it. Bethenny is busy making a sign with the kit she brought. Sonja says no one had better come near Bethenny’s bedroom tonight. Dorinda wonders what she’s talking about, and Ramona says, she’s talking sh*t. Bethenny tells Sonja to drink a glass of water first. In Bethenny’s interview, she says, there’s a line in This Is Spinal Tapthis one goes to eleven – Sonja is at fifteen. Sonja says she’s going all night, and picks up Ramona’s dog, holding the dog under her chin. In her interview, Ramona says when Sonja is wasted like this, she doesn’t want her holding Coco. Dorinda extracts the dog from Sonja.

Bethenny shows everyone her ring from Dennis, and Dorinda says Richard had given her a similar diamond. Sonja says, here we go. She doesn’t mind talking about Richard, but Dorinda doesn’t like talking about her husband. In Sonja’s interview, she thinks Dorinda’s biggest problem with her bringing up her ex, is that he’s a Morgan. She doesn’t want to be with John, but she likes John. But John is Joe Schmo. LuAnn and Dorinda go out for a smoke. Sonja talks about Dorinda putting her paws on the letters at Ventfort Hall. She starts to get animated, waving and pointing, and shouting, you don’t touch the effing Morgan letters! Ramona is sorry she’s upset, and Sonja starts bawling. Bethenny wonders, what just happened?   

Next time, LuAnn makes fun of Bethenny, Tinsley says her dad chose drinking over the family, Dorinda tells Barbara to stop being an interloper, and Bethenny says Tinsley can’t live life on Scott’s terms.

⏰ Time Flies…

Whether you’re having fun or not. How did this get to be 25 years ago?

🎸 My Favorite…

I always forget how good this song is until I hear it again.






April 9, 2019 – Two Plans Are Hatched, LVP Celebrates Her Birthday Without Kyle, Tanya Has a Breakdown & Morning


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Sonny introduces himself to Neil, and asks if he wants coffee. Neil just wants to know what he’s doing there.

Chase and Willow go to The Floating Rib. He asks if she’s sure she’s okay. She seems quiet. She says, other than DOD members, she’s never shown anyone else the tattoo. He’s glad she trusted him, and she says he needs to understand how insidious DOD is. Michael joins them, and Willow asks if his little sister is still involved with DOD. He says, she’s getting in deeper. He’s tried to reconnect with her, but it’s slow going. Willow says his sister is in more trouble than he realizes.

Sam goes to the attic, and looks in Harmony’s bag. She sees the tool roll, and looks through it. She says, someone’s getting a tattoo.

Shiloh greets Harmony, and asks if she’s met Kristina. She says she has, and prepared her for the ceremony. He asks if she played nice, and she says, of course. Kristina is a perfect candidate for the Trust. He’s glad she approves. Kristina also introduced her sister, and said Sam is a devoted student. He says, she’s learning. He asks if the supplies are ready in the attic, and Harmony says she’ll show him.

At the hospital, Curtis asks Jordan how dialysis went, and she says, it was a super-hot session. He says he should be jealous, and she says he might have reason to be. All of a sudden, she feels lightheaded. Curtis asks if she’s okay, and she collapses in his arms.

At The Floating Rib, Ava thanks Felicia and Laura for meeting her. She wants to discuss the problem they have in common – Ryan Chamberlain.

Curtis gives Jordan some water. She wants to get moving, and he says she just fainted. She says she was lightheaded; it can happen after dialysis. He wants a doctor to check her out, but she says she just needs to recover from the never ending calls from Margaux. Curtis says Margaux is relentless. Jordan says she chose to answer the calls, and chose to keep arguing about it. Curtis asks, about what? and she says Margaux closed the case on Ryan Chamberlain.

Ava says Ryan is MIA, and Felicia agrees he might still be alive. They need a plan of action. Laura wants to wait for the lab report to see if he was alive or dead when his hand was severed. Ava says, he probably chopped it off himself. Felicia wouldn’t put past him, if it would make the cops think he was dead. Ava says, he’s hiding; biding his time. Felicia says, he’ll wait. Give them a chance to get back to their lives and get complacent. Then he’ll come back for what he wants. Ava asks what Felicia thinks that is, and Felicia says, Ava.

Sonny tells Neil to have a seat. Neil is aware of Sonny’s reputation, but Sonny says the meeting has nothing to do with business; it involves a family member. He has a contact in security screening who said Neil has the expertise he’s looking for in rescuing people from cults. Neil asks what’s happening, and Sonny says, his daughter, Kristina. Jason says she’s heavily involved in the group Dawn of Day. Sonny says he needs Neil’s help to get her out of there.

Shiloh tells Harmony, before they go upstairs, he has good news. He found her. Harmony says, omg; where is she? He says, here in Port Charles. She’s been there for months. Harmony says she had no idea, and Shiloh says, obviously. Harmony asks if he’s seen her. He says, yes, and Harmony asks, how is she? He says, she seems well. As beautiful as ever. The only difference is, she changed her name. She goes by Willow Tait.

Willow tells Michael that she wasn’t entirely honest about her involvement with DOD. She used to be a member. She wasn’t even twenty, and it was the biggest mistake of her life. Michael asks why she left, and Willow says she knew she had to. He asks for specifics. Willow hesitates, and he says, Molly thinks Kristina has been brainwashed. Anything she can tell him would be helpful. She says, it’s hard to say. She came to her senses. Chase says Shiloh has been trying to find her since she left. He’s trying to lure her back. Michael says maybe Willow can talk to Kristina, but Willow says, members are taught to be distrustful of anyone who leaves. Shiloh instills intense loyalty, but he’s after more than loyalty. Michael asks if there’s anything criminal, but Chase says, nothing he can be prosecuted for. Michael wonders how he can help Kristina. Willow says if she’s been selected for the Trust, she’ll think it’s an honor to be chosen. Once you’re admitted, the way it’s set up, when you’re in, it’s almost impossible to get out.

Sam takes pictures of the instruments, and packs everything back up. She take pictures of the room. Outside in the hallway, Shiloh tells Harmony they need to focus on Kristina first. Sam hears them coming.

Shiloh and Harmony go into the room, and no surprise, there’s no Sam. Shiloh says, it looks good. The perfect welcome. He hopes Kristina isn’t having second thoughts. Harmony says she doesn’t know Kristina well, but she doesn’t think so. Sam was asking questions though. Shiloh says Sam is protective, but Harmony doesn’t think the words registered. Kristina is so eager, she asked to skip the pre-ceremony reflection. Shiloh asks if Harmony told her it was mandatory, and Harmony says, of course. She asks, what about Kristina’s pledge? and he says, it’s a good one. A truth about her family. It will be useful. Shiloh has to finish the preparations for midnight, and they leave. Sam comes out of hiding, and jets.

Sonny asks if Neil knows how things work at DOD. Neil says he’s heard about the organization, but his work is confidential. Sonny doesn’t care about ethics; he just wants answers. Jason looks at his phone, and has to run. Sonny asks what Neil has heard about DOD. Neil says it meets the general criteria of a cult. A charismatic leader, who gives vague promises of spiritual enlightenment. They’re xenophobic, and don’t trust outsiders. Their legitimacy comes from their leader, so Sonny’s daughter is in a cult. Sonny asks how they help her. Neil tells him, keep an open line of communication. The family needs to let her know they’re on her side. Sonny says they’re past that already. She’s cut ties, and there’s only one family member who has contact; her older brother. Sonny says he’s taking steps to remove her, and Neil says he hopes not by force.

Harmony tells Shiloh that she thinks Kristina will be a valuable addition to the circle. She’s bright, enthusiastic, and good with people. Shiloh says she’ll be beneficial. Now if they can just get Kelly… Willow to come home. Harmony reminds him that tonight is about Kristina. She’s going to prepare a drink to calm Kristina down. They walk to the kitchen, and Sam flies out the door and runs.

Michael asks Willow, what happens in the Trust? She says the member is given more responsibility. Shiloh makes them feel special, indispensable, but he’s just tightening the noose. He assures their loyalty. Michael asks what they have to do to be chosen, but she says, it’s up to Shiloh. He chooses the members, and decides when they’re ready for initiation. Michael asks what’s required? and she says, they’re asked to give themselves over to DOD in every conceivable way. After they commit, there’s no turning back.

Felicia tells Ava, if Ryan survived – and she thinks he did – he’s coming back. He literally can’t help himself. He fixated on her years ago in Texas. She saw him murder his wife, and she took Maxie and fled. He was so infatuated with her, he followed her. He was relentless, and showed up at her wedding to Mac with a bomb. He was sent to an asylum, killed his therapist, and escaped. He could have disappeared, but he came back and kidnapped Georgie just to get her attention. Ava is his new obsession, and she needs to be ready for his return. Ava says, exactly. That’s why she’s here. She needs to know everything about Ryan, so when he comes back for her, she’s ready.

Jordan tells Curtis that Margaux decided to go with the Canadian authorities on this one. She doesn’t want to spend any more time or money searching for Ryan or his remains. Curtis says if he’s still alive, he has no one looking for him. He’s been given a free pass. Jordan says she spent the entire time during her treatment arguing the point with Margaux, and got nowhere. He says, Margaux is wrong on this one, and she says, the cops can’t do anything; so he’ll have to.

Felicia says they need to take action; be in control, and seize the momentum. Lure Ryan back to Port Charles, on their timetable, not his. Ava says, that’s great in theory, but how do they manage it realistically? Felicia says, use Ava as bait.

Jordan says Curtis is the best investigator she’s ever worked with. He’s smart, intuitive, and better at documenting elements than any cop she knows. He hated the paperwork, and she says, the good news is, he’s no longer a cop, paperwork doesn’t matter. She wants him to go to Niagara Falls, and pick up where they left off. Find out who’s seen Ryan or who he’s spoken to. He asks if she thinks he’ll do better than all the professionals have. The case came up empty. She says he gets the kind of intel that cracks cases. She’d do it herself if she could. He says she’s in no position, and she says, but he is. And she needs it for her peace of mind.

Neil tells Sonny that he won’t be a party to kidnapping. Sonny says he didn’t say kidnapping, but Neil says, it was strongly implied. Sonny says, all Neil needs to know, is they’re getting her out. When she’s home, she’ll need to get her life back together. She’s smart, but just got lost. He says, a couple of years ago, his son was killed. He was a lot like Kristina; impulsive and volatile. In the end, Sonny couldn’t save him. He’s not going to have another child dead. He’s asking, please, can Neil help him get his daughter back?

Kristina comes downstairs, and tells Shiloh that she wasn’t sure what to wear. Shiloh says she looks lovely, but there’s a special garment. Another word no one uses, unless they’re in the fashion industry. Harmony says she’ll go get it. Shiloh asks if Kristina is nervous, but she says she’s eager, anticipating. Harmony told her what to expect, and she can’t wait. He heard she wanted to forego the personal reflection. She says she knows she’s ready, but he says it’s important to meditate. It’s the time to make sure she’s clear on devoting herself to DOD. The time to turn back. He wants her to be certain; it’s her choice. She says she is, but he thinks she should still meditate on the gravity of her commitment. Take the time to think. She’s always happy to be enlightened, but he didn’t really explain his part. He’ll be there, right?

Michael says, so it appears consensual, and Willow says Shiloh convinces the member it’s something they should want; an honor. Michael says, technically, no laws are broken. His phone dings, and he has to meet someone. He’s sorry to crash their date. and thanks Willow. He knows it’s difficult, but she might have saved his sister. Willow hopes so. Michael leaves, and Chase tells Willow that it was brave of her to share. She hopes it’s not too late. Kristina is almost totally submerged. She tells Chase that she can’t stand one more minute, and wants to focus on anything else that has nothing to do with DOD. He thinks he has an idea.

Jason meets Michael, and tells him that Sam is meeting them. She got some information on DOD. Michael says he did his best to get Sonny to back off, but they’re wrong. It’s worse than they realized. Sam joins them, and Michael says his friend Willow gave him some information. She was in the circle close to Shiloh. Sam says, the Trust. Michael asks if Kristina is in it, and Sam says, not yet, but she knows Shiloh is planning on initiating her tonight. She shows them the pictures, and Michael says, it’s exactly how Willow described it. Jason says, that’s tattooing equipment, and Sam says, a tangible symbol that you belong to DOD. You’re marked for life, but that’s just the beginning.

Felicia tells Ava, as long as Ryan is obsessed with her, use it. Ava says she’ll do whatever it takes, and Felicia says, lure him back. Laura says she can’t help them. Vigilante justice is never a good idea for the mayor. Ava understands her reluctance, but thinks Laura should leave before they discuss their plan further.

As they put on their skates, Willow says she’d never guess Chase was into roller disco. He says he’s never tried it. The ice skating was such a success, it was turned into a roller rink for spring and summer. She says it’s been a while since she skated. Chase says the last time he skated didn’t go so well. It was a birthday party he went to in high school. He was trying to impress a girl, and started going too fast. He couldn’t stop, and crashed into the DJ booth. She laughs, and he says, it’s not funny. He was called Wipeout for two years. He struggles to stand, and she says, come on, Wipeout. Now’s his chance.

Neil tells Sonny, once there’s an exit, the process has to be challenged. They need to show Kristina that her decision making process has been compromised, but she’ll resist. Believing her family is key. Sonny says, her mother might take convincing, but she’ll come around. She wants Kristina out like he does. Neil flashes back taking to Alexis saying Kristina’s father is impatient. He wants to get her out now, and deal with the psychological ramifications later. He’s prepared to kidnap her. Neil tells Sonny that Kristina is fortunate. Not everyone has the same level of parental involvement. With prior exits, there hasn’t been great success. Followers are taught to resist outsider’s opinions, and anyone who criticizes the principals and teachings. Sonny asks, will he help? Neil says his last exit therapy ended badly. He doesn’t think he’s the right person to help Sonny’s daughter.

Sam tells Jason and Michael that she overheard Harmony talking about how Kristina pledged to give Shiloh something. It’s about the family. Michael asks who Harmony is, and Jason says she’s Shiloh’s number two, and in charge of Beechers Corners. Sam says she’s there for Kristina’s initiation. Michael tells them that Willow said Shiloh chooses the criteria for the pledge, but didn’t tell them anything specific. Jason asks how Kristina is. Sam says, she’s excited to be part if Shiloh’s inner circle, and Michael says, she has no idea what’s coming.

Shiloh tells Kristina that he doesn’t participate in the actual ceremony. She thought since DOD was his vision, he would. He says, the Trust is a community within the community. It’s a special sisterhood, and she needs to bond with them. They’ve gone through the ritual already, and will welcome her into their company. She says, so he has no part in the initiation? but he says he never said that.

Felicia tells Ava not to let Laura’s goody-goody mayor act fool her. Laura is the real deal. Laura asks what they have in mind. She’s not committing; just asking. Felicia says, Ryan’s Achille’s Heel is his pride. He can’t stand when someone beats him. Ava says he lost it when Franco went public with his fake confession, and took credit for his genius. Laura says, when he held them in Ferncliff, Doc manipulated him by pointing out his mistakes, and it caused him to make more. Felicia says it was the same with her and Mac. Ryan lost all his common sense trying to tear them apart. Ava asks if Felicia is suggesting she find a new man and flaunt it. Felicia says it would infuriate him, and motivate him to come back to claim her for himself.

Curtis asks if Jordan wants him to head up to Canada and do a comprehensive search. Jordan says it’s the only way to know if Ryan survived. He says his wife is having a health crisis, but she says it was just dialysis. He says she lost one kidney, and the other is compromised. He needs to be there; he loves her. Jordan says she understands, but he’ll need more than that to get her to take it easy for the foreseeable future. She needs to rest up. If Ryan survived, and is heading to Port Charles, she needs to be ready. He says, gearing up to do battle with a serial killer isn’t resting. He might have to tie her to the bed. She says only if she gets to tie him up too. Her phone rings. He tells her not to answer if it’s Margaux. She says it’s the forensics lab. The results on Ryan’s hand are in.

Sonny says Neil is an expert at exit therapy, but Neil says there are other experts. He can give Sonny a referral. Sonny says he doesn’t need a referral. He can tell Neil is smart and perceptive, and he doesn’t want to waste time. He understands what Kristina is going through, and has the skill to help her. Neil tells him flattery isn’t going to help, and Sonny tells him to name a price.

Shiloh says after she’s welcomed to the Trust, he’ll complete the initiation. Kristina asks how that works, and he says she’ll find out when she’s ready. She’ll have hours to tell him all about what happened in her own special way. She can’t wait. Harmony brings her the garment for her initiation. Shiloh says he forgot; he doesn’t have a picture with Kristina. He asks Harmony to take one. She tells them, smile and say Dawn of Day.

Michael tells Sam and Jason, the honoree is left alone for fifteen minutes to reflect on their commitment. Shiloh makes a big deal about it being the final offer to back out. Jason says so he can’t be nailed for anything illegal. Michael says, he’s not there for the tattoo part, but afterward, he welcomes the honoree into the Trust by having sex with them.

Laura thinks baiting Ryan is practically suicide, but Ava says justice for her daughter is worth it. Felicia says they’ll have a safeguard, and Laura says, what kind? Say they’re right, and Ryan is coming back for Ava. If he believes she’s happy with her new man, he’ll be in a jealous rage. What’s to stop him from killing the two of them? Ava pats her bag, and says she has a handle on it. Felicia says, it’s risky, but if he’s out there, they need to stop him. Does Laura have a better idea?

Jordan tells Curtis that Ryan was alive when his hand was severed. Curtis says, the injury could have killed him; he could have bled out. Jordan says, or survived.

Willow tells Chase she had so much fun, and he lived up to his name. He says, the humiliation was worth it. He got to take her out. They kiss.

Sonny tells Neil, once Kristina is out, he can step in. Neil says he hasn’t agreed, and Sonny says he’ll pay whatever Neil wants. Neil says, it’s not about money. Sonny says, it’s about Kristina’s life, future, and freedom. She’s made mistakes, and this one could take her down. She needs to get her head on straight. Can Neil help her? Neil agrees, and says once Sonny has her away from DOD, he’ll step in. They shake hands, and Sonny thanks him. Neil says to let him know when he’s needed.

Michael says he has to tell Kristina, and Jason asks if he thinks it would change her mind. Sam says, not at all. Kristina is honored. Michael says if he can’t convince her, they’ll have to take her. Jason says he’ll handle it. It’s better Kristina be mad at him. It will give Michael room to help her. He’s going to talk to the bartender and establish an alibi. He leaves, and Sam says they have to hurry. Kristina is being initiated at midnight.

Shiloh leads Kristina is to the attic. She goes inside, and says, it’s amazing. She had no idea what was up there. Shiloh says only members of the Trust are allowed to see it, and soon, she’ll be one of them. He brings out a sheet, and says he’s transferred her pledge to print for her to sign. She says, like a contract? but he says, more like a safeguard; in case something happens to the recording. Kristina hopes he put it away for safekeeping, and he asks if she’s questioning the ritual and her commitment. She says she’s committed, and signs. I’m thinking she should be committed. Shiloh says, very good, and takes the paper. Kristina wants to make him proud; repay him for everything he’s given her. He strokes her hair, and says she’s such a special person. He tells her, enjoy the ceremony, and leaves. She waits and smiles, but her smile looks a little hesitant.

Tomorrow, Maxie asks Peter if he’s staying or going, Chase has something he hopes Willow is into, and Jason says he’s getting Kristina out.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

I’m bummed before the show even starts, and oh great, we see part of the fight again.

24 hours later. Kyle tells the others (minus LVP and LisaR), they won’t believe what happened. She went to LVP’s because she felt bad. As a friend, she couldn’t say LVP wouldn’t do this. LVP wants her to swoop in, but when it comes not telling truth, she’s not willing to do that. In her interview, Kyle says she thought the issues with LVP were over, until Dorit found the article online. Immediately, the women assumed LVP was behind the story. As her friend, Kyle felt awful about the conversation behind LVP’s back. We see clips of that conversation. Kyle tells them that she wanted to tell the truth, and lay everything on the table, but it was angry and hostile. Ken said he hoped she’d told the others it wasn’t true, but she said she couldn’t do that. He said she wasn’t his or LVP’s effing friend, and to get out. Throughout her story, we keep flashing back to this total downer. LVP told her there was nothing left to say, and asked her to leave. She could have said she was sorry Kyle felt that way. Anything but this. Erika says, that’s not friendship; that’s bullsh*t. Zzzzz… Erika. I’m tired of her acting like she knows everything because she’s a C-list celebrity who dances around in spandex, and is moderately successful because she has the bucks and is on this show.

We see pink roses at Villa Rosa, delivered for LVP’s birthday. Giggy! Giggy licks tea from Ken’s finger. LVP doesn’t think Ken ever lost it like that. She tells Ken that kitchen designer Steven is coming. She asks why Ken looks worried, and wonders if it’s the expense or the thought of them not living with a cooking facility. It’s going to be more expensive than she told him, and he says he knew it would be. Steven arrives, and says he has good stuff to show her. LVP makes tea. In her interview, she says it didn’t feel right to have a big birthday celebration, since losing her brother. Ken and Pandora are throwing her a surprise party, so she’s just going along with it. She shows Steven a locket the kids got her, with pictures of them, Ken, and Nanny Kay. In LVP’s interview, she says she’s taken a lot of stuff from Kyle. We flash back to Kyle wondering who Nanny Kay is, and LVP says, it’s the little things like that, that hurt. She asks Steven when they’re starting. She wants a transformed space, and wants it fresh, bright, and positive. He shows her a cabinet door, and says they still need to hit the stone yards for options. She quite likes the countertop material. Steven says, it will be a lot of white; she’ll have a lighter, happier kitchen. In LVP’s interview, she says she hasn’t had a good time in that kitchen lately. Kyle was aggressive, and she wants a new beginning, and to create something gorgeous. She tells Ken the kitchen has a negative vibe, and she wants it gone.

Kyle meets Mauricio for dinner. In her interview, she says their date nights have changed over twenty-five years. It was all about the kids, then business, and now it’s where do they see themselves in ten years? Mauricio asks how her day was, and she says she likes to have a lot of balls in the air. He says he had a great day, meeting with amazing developers. A waiter grates truffles on the pasta, and Kyle finds out they’re $3K a pound. She tells Mauricio, a few weeks ago, she woke up thinking things felt different. There’s been a shift in energy. Mauricio says, things can’t be perfect all the time. She knows there have been problems here and there, but this feels sad. She still hasn’t spoken to LVP. Mauricio says they were such good friends. Kyle feels horrible, and still loves her.

LVP tells Ken she doesn’t want love like that. She wouldn’t love someone who she thought was manipulative and a liar.

Kyle tells Mauricio the only reason there’s an issue is because she didn’t stand up and say LVP wouldn’t do this. Mauricio is shocked at how Ken spoke to Kyle, and says, it’s unacceptable.

LVP tells Ken that he came on strong. He agrees, and says when Kyle picked on her, he saw red.

Mauricio tells Kyle that she should stand up for her friends, but at the end of the day, she has to be true to herself. In Kyle’s interview, she thought she and LVP were in a place where they would never fight again. She hates the bad feelings. She tells Mauricio that LVP holds friendship as a ransom. Mauricio says, she’s always been like that. Kyle feels sad.

LVP tells Ken, she can say she’s hurt, or that she doesn’t like what Kyle did, but she’s not going to stand there and say what an effing bitch she was. Oops. She just said it.

Dorit experiments with smoothies for PK, with help from PK’s assistant Sadie. In her interview, Dorit says, PK was diagnosed with diabetes before they met. It’s been a daily struggle. She tells Sadie, if PK doesn’t change his lifestyle, it will become irreversible. He can’t wrap his head around it being a serious illness. We see clips of him stuffing his face and drinking like a fish. She wants him to be able to enjoy what he eats, and he can, as long as it’s balanced. She and Sadie puzzle over the bullet blender. Sadie turns it on and runs. Dorit can’t shut it off, and Sadie ends up pulling the plug. They make a smoothie, and Dorit is the tasting guinea pig. In her interview, she says she’ll try anything to trick PK into eating healthier, but this is the most disgusting smoothie she’s ever tasted. If she can’t swallow it, there’s no way PK will. She tells Sadie that she feels like she’s drinking… Sadie says, compost?

LisaR, Denise, and Erika go to a flying yoga session. In her interview, LisaR say she’s game to try anything. Maybe she’s going through a midlife yoga crisis. Denise and Erika don’t five a f***. Those are her kind of people. Mine too, but I’m sticking with just Denise. The instructor explains how it works. They hang upside down, and LisaR asks if it hurts their Botox. In LisaR’s interview, she says it’s absurd, but it’s not like she hasn’t been upside down with her legs spread before. Well, maybe not upside down. They right themselves. In Denise’s interview, she says she’s up for any type of exercise, but she doesn’t get this or what it does. It’s one of those weird LA classes. The instructor congratulates them on their first inversion. Erika gets stuck. You’d think she’d be the one who could do it with all the jumping around she does on stage. In her interview, she says she will not be incorporating aerial work into her show.

Erika says she had a great time at the wedding. Kyle told her that she was going to see LVP, and LisaR says Kyle claimed it got heated, and they threw her out of the house. In LisaR’s interview, she says she’s seen Kyle and LVP fight and come back together tons of times. It must be devastating for Kyle. To be kicked out of the house is pretty major; a whole other level. LisaR wants to get together for Denise next Friday, since she couldn’t be there. Erika has rehearsal, and can’t make it. She’s excited the tour has sold out in Chicago. In her interview, she says, when you find out people are hungry for you, you want to go everywhere you possibly can. Forget your families; you’re on the road, so merry Christmas. Denise can’t wait to see her show. Erika says she’s welcome to jump on the tour.

Aaron puts up security cameras. Denise says now they can see if people sneak in or out. In her interview, she explains that Sammie is in high school, and that’s when kids start sneaking out. She started at fifteen. She’s putting up cameras, so they can catch her. She tells Aaron, at least they’re honest. They could have hid them. I don’t think I ever snuck out, but I didn’t always go where I said I was going. They do some barbecuing, since they’re flying solo tonight. Denise likes hanging out with Aaron. She feels badly for Kyle, and asks Aaron if women fighting is weird. Men are different. He says they just take it outside, and she says women go on and on and on. In her interview, she says, Aaron is a great sounding board for girl talk. He actually listens, and gives good input. She asks him if she should talk to LVP, and he asks what she wants to achieve by getting in the middle of it. She says her experiences with LVP have been lovely, and she’s been kind to Eloise. Aaron says it’s tough be in her position. They just met, and LVP appears to be nice. Denise says she doesn’t want to get on LVP’s bad side. If she did this, she plays dirty. In Denise’s interview, she says she’s encountered dirty players. At the time, she kept her mouth shut, but in hindsight, she’d fight fire with fire. Aaron says LVP will probably call her. If the opportunity presents itself, okay, but whatever happens, speak her truth. She says when she talks to LVP, she’ll see where it goes.

In her interview, Dorit explains that PK has type 2 diabetes, but is on the cusp of going into type 1, which is more serious and irreversible. She tries desperately to get him to eat healthy, but it’s virtually impossible to get him to eat vegetables. She’s trying to undo his lifestyle for something healthier. She checks his blood, and says, it’s 318. PK jokes that he’s close to a diabetic coma, but Dorit doesn’t think it’s funny. She can’t get through to him. In Dorit’s interview, she says he’s an impossible patient. He brushes it off, and says he’ll do it tomorrow, and it’s frustrating. If she saw anything was registering, she would feel hope. Jaeger asks Dorit to take the dill off his cracker or whatever. She tells PK there’s been no communication with LVP. He wasn’t aware they’d fallen out, and she says she wasn’t aware either. She has no idea where LVP’s head is. PK says she didn’t ask him to come to her birthday. Why didn’t she invite anyone? Dorit can’t answer for her. In her interview, once again she says she didn’t do anything wrong, and I scream in my head. PK says, when LVP is ready, she’ll tell him the way she feels. Dorit says LVP will get to the point when she wants talk, and when she does, Dorit will be ready and available. Until then, she’s getting on with life.

Teddi meets LisaR for lunch. Teddi says she’s been super busy. She’s started falling asleep giving her daughter a goodnight kiss. LisaR misses those days. She says, they go by fast, and then they tell you, get out. The others are joining them, but Denise is stopping for a drink with LVP before she comes.

Kyle calls Denise, who says she’ll be late. She’s meeting LVP at TomTom. In her interview, Denise says, like Aaron said would happen, she heard from LVP, who asked her to stop by. Kyle says it’s her birthday celebration. Denise doesn’t know if she can help smooth things over, but she’s willing to give it a shot. Kyle doesn’t know if LVP will respond, but asks Denise to tell her happy birthday. She hasn’t heard from LVP, but maybe Denise can bridge the gap.

My brain shorts out when I see Schwartz and Tom on the wrong show. It’s not computing. In Denise’s interview, she says her experiences with LVP have been lovely. She wants to be there for her. She doesn’t want to confront LVP, but wants to listen to her.

Teddi asks if LisaR has talked to LVP, and she says they had a little text. She’d tweeted a birthday tweet. We see a picture of her hands showing off cupcakes that have pills for decorations. In her interview, LisaR says it’s become a running joke for her and her family about her bag o’ pills. It started with LVP and Dorit. We flash back to them joking about her pill bag. She says everybody thinks it’s funny because she’s not a pill popper, and if she was, it wouldn’t be funny. People pointed out that it might not be funny because of LVP’s brother dying, and when she thought LVP might take it another way, she sent a text saying it was a joke. LVP texted back that she was glad it wasn’t intended another way because of her brother. LisaR tells Teddi that she didn’t know he died the way he did. Really? Because I did, and I’m not even part of their group. In LisaR’s interview, she says people told her it was in poor taste, and she was like, oh no. Teddi says she’d never think that, and thinks LVP knows that. LisaR says her sister died of an overdose, and she’d never make a joke about it. It’s a very sensitive subject, and understandably so.

LVP asks Ken who he invited, and he says nobody who will upset her birthday. LVP says it’s a sad situation. Kyle should be coming; they’ve celebrated every birthday together. We flash back, and I feel sad all over again. Ken says he’s not letting anything ruin it, so he couldn’t include Kyle and Dorit. LVP says she’s happy without them, but doesn’t look happy.

Kyle arrives at Beauty & Essex, and joins Teddi and LisaR. She complains about the traffic Dorit is next, and IMO, looks absolutely stupid with her boobs practically falling out of her dress, the neckline is so low and wide. It’s like something a Kardashian would wear. In her interview, LisaR says, Dorit looks good, but obviously, that gets a no from me. On the other hand, when Camille arrives, she looks adorable in a romper that’s age appropriate, or at least for the age she looks.

Denise waits at TomTom. In her interview, she says she’s waiting for a drink with LVP before the celebration. Guests are guest arriving, and she feels awkward. Some dude talks to her. She has no idea who he is, but she’ll talk to anyone in a bar. At least he’s being nice to her.

The girls order, and ask Camille about her upcoming wedding. In her interview, LisaR says she didn’t invite anyone to her wedding who made the hair on the back of her neck stand up. We flash back to Camille saying that about Dorit. LisaR wonders, who the eff does that? She asks if Kyle has talked to LVP, but she hasn’t. LisaR says Denise is meeting her for a drink, and Dorit wonders why Denise got invited, and not them. She’s known Denise for ten seconds. Maybe so, but Denise is cooler than all of the rest of them put together.

LVP arrives at TomTom. She greets a few people, including a lady who’s been carrying around a dog that’s really too big to carry around. Giggy! In her interview, Denise says she feels sad for LVP. She’s putting on a happy face, but she knows LVP has to feel sad that the other women aren’t there. Denise gives her a gift bag, and LVP asks if she wants to stay. Denise says she has another dinner; otherwise, she would. Maybe they can have lunch next week. In her interview, Denise guesses LVP forgot, but she knows there’s a lot on her mind. Denise says she knows about the discord, and LVP says it’s devastating to her. She doesn’t want to drag Denise in. Denise knows she feels… LVP says, attacked?There’s a pause, and LVP thanks her for coming.

Denise joins the girls. Kyle asks how married life is. Denise says everything is good, and thanks LisaR for putting the dinner together. She apologizes for being late. Kyle asks how LVP is, and Denise says, happy her friends and family are there. She told LVP that she wanted to get together for lunch. She doesn’t know her that well, and they have no history. She mentioned that she sees there’s discord, so she’ll see if there’s a way to mend it or not. In Kyle’s interview, she says not speaking to LVP, and not spending her birthday with her is weird. They’re always together. Dorit doesn’t understand why LVP is upset with everyone.  LisaR says she has no beef with LVP. Kyle says they were all talking until she went to the house; then everyone got cut off. In her interview, Dorit says when LVP is feeling hurt, she pushes everyone away. She’ll speak to them when she feels they’ve been appropriately punished. Denise thinks she was hesitant to talk because all of her guests were right there, but she seems to be doing okay. *See below for LVP’s explanation.

Giggy! LVP greets Kevin Lee and Mohamed Hadid. I guess she and Mohamed mended fences. Max says he heard she was having trouble with her friends. LVP asks who told him, and he says, Pandy. She doesn’t want to talk about it, and Pandora says she can count on them. LVP asks if Max isn’t working tonight; he must know the owners. JohnS tells her that they have something prepared for her. Maybe involving a stripper. Several servers come out with sparklers, followed with a cake carried by half-naked dudes. She says, thank God they have trousers on.  She thanks everyone for caring. It’s been a tough year this year, and she hopes for a better one. She loves them, and their friendship means everything to her. She thanks them for being there, and says, now, let’s party.

LisaR toasts to Denise and Aaron, and many happy years together. Kyle says, and the next bride. They toast to Camille. She says she doesn’t even remember being in bed with Kelsey. It was never that hot and heavy. She did learn a lot because of him, but the love petered out at the end. We flash back to how he screwed her over, and her saying the other woman doesn’t know she destroyed a family. Denise likes how Camille said, petered out; she’s using that. Kyle loves when Camille gets like that. We flash back to her saying Kelsey was a terrible kisser. In her interview, Kyle says it’s entertaining when Camille gets on a roll. You never know what will come out of her mouth. Denise suggests Camille have another drink. They discuss man-grooming, and Camille says she used to be a dental assistant, so she’s particular. She says before LVP got her teeth redone, she told her that she needed new caps; her gumline was receding.  In her interview, Dorit thinks Camille should zip it. In Teddi’s interview, she says she has issues with LVP, but this kind of talk is next level, and there’s no going back. Camille says she’s going down. Just bring her casket to the wedding.

*On Watch What Happens Live, LVP (a solo guest) explained that the reason she pushed away from all of them was because Kyle told her they all felt that way. While I’m on the subject, Andy is also starting to grow a beard, and no. Just no.

Next time, a surprise shower for Camille, LVP helps demo the kitchen, Lois is in town, and Camille and LisaR tangle about Judge Cavanaugh.

If Loving You Is Wrong

Tanya is freaking out, naked in the street. Lushion tells Natalie to call 911. Randal comes out and says, she’s in psychosis. Tanya says she won’t stop following her. Randal asks, who? but Tanya doesn’t know. He asks if she likes red; it’s a pretty color. She says she does, but then starts making rhymes. She tells him, all God’s children go to heaven. Dogs too. Randal asks if she’s ever had a dog, and she says she has, but the weeping willow tree killed him. He says she must be cold, and she says her skin is fur and warm. He asks if he can put a blanket on her, saying the elk in Yellowstone need covers. He puts the blanket around her shoulders. She accepts it, but then yells, no, no, no! and runs home.

Natalie asks Lushion, what’s going on? He says, it’s some kind of breakdown. He’s going to call the station, and have them do a welfare check. Randal says he’d better hurry, and Natalie says, like he cares. He says he doesn’t. She tells him, show some decency, and he asks, what’s that? He sees Alex is home, and says he’ll come by tomorrow after work to see the baby. She says, okay, and he tells her, wear something sexy. She goes back inside. Lushion starts walking toward Tanya’s house, and Natalie asks where he’s going. He says he’s waiting for the medic, and Natalie asks, what if she has a gun? He tells her, go in the house, but she doesn’t like this. He says, he need to help, but she tells him, let the professionals do it. He says he is one. Natalie thought she was off when they met her. Lushion asks if Natalie knows her name, and Natalie says, Tanya. She lives with her husband; he’s a firefighter. Lushion asks if she’s seen him in uniform, and if he works for Maxine. She asks why he’s interrogating her. She’s not one of his suspects. He tells her, go in the house.

Tanya’s husband pulls up. Lushion tries to get his attention, but he says he has to check on his wife. He runs inside, and Lushion tells Natalie, it looks like they have some new neighbors. Natalie says one is crazier than this a-hole, indicating Randal. Eddie drives up, and she says, even worse. Eddie walks toward Lushion, throwing money in the air, and telling Lushion to buy some rounds. Lushion and Natalie walk back to their house, and Eddie struts over to Alex’s place. She tells him, get away, and he asks, where’s Brad? She says he’s not there, and the kids are sleeping. She tells him to go home to his wife, but he says she hasn’t talked to him for years; he has no home. He sticks his foot in the door, but she says she’s not letting him in. He says she’s his cousin, and she says, go to hell. He tells her that he needs to use the bathroom, and asks where Brad is again. They trade insults until Alex finally tells him to move his foot. He says he needs to take a piss, but she doesn’t care. She pushes him out, and closes door.

Eddie goes over to Randal’s house. He says, this SOB, and pees on Randal’s lawn. I guess he wasn’t kidding. He walks around the yard, peeing, and up onto the porch. That Tyler Perry, always full of surprises. I can’t say I’ve ever seen this before. Randal opens the door, and asks why Eddie is there. Eddie says he’s taking a piss, and Randal says, get off. Eddie says, when he’s done, and moonwalks backward while peeing. I’m dying laughing. Randal throws water at him, and comes down to the lawn. He tells Eddie that he has no idea what’s coming for him. He heard what Eddie did with Larry. Eddie asks if she said how much it turned her on, and Randal says Larry didn’t mention that. Eddie says, she should have. Randal asks how much Eddie knows about Larry, and he says Larry is a punk, like Randal. Randal says he’s going to enjoy this. Eddie has more than met his match. The difference between them is that Larry is smart. He’s looking forward to this. I am too, and it’s probably the first time Randal and I will ever agree. Eddie says he lives for this. Randal tells him, enjoy his last days. Even pussy… cats like Eddie only have nine lives. Eddie says he runs this junk, and Randal wonders how well a lion does in the ocean against a shark. Eddie says any time Randal wants to dance, let him know. Randal can’t say it’s been nice knowing him, but he is saying, clean this up.

Ben tells Tanya to take her pills, but she refuses. He says she told him that she’s been taking them. What is she doing with them? She says she has been, but won’t take the one he’s trying to give her. He tries to force it into her mouth. Outside, Eddie hears them yelling, and runs over. He bangs on the door, says, police, and comes in with his gun drawn. He asks if Tanya is okay. She says she is, and he asks if Ben is hurting her. She says, yes, and Ben says, she’s mentally ill. He just made her take her meds. He tells Tanya to let Eddie know she’s okay. She toddles off to the bedroom, and Eddie says, one more word, and he’s taking Ben’s ass to jail. He closes the door and lowers his gun. He asks what Ben is doing. He heard her screaming. Take a sock, and ram it in her mouth so no one can hear it, or he’ll have all kinds of cops here. He doesn’t want that. Ben asks if he’s serious, and Eddie says, shut a bitch up, or everyone will hear his business. Ben says, it’s not that, and Eddie says he’s been there before. Ben asks again if he’s serious, and Eddie says, dead serious. He shakes Ben’s hand, and says, shut the ho up. Don’t make him come back. He leaves, and I’m guessing Ben is sorry he ever moved there.

Natalie asks if Lushion thinks it’s drugs, but he says, no. It looked like something else. She hopes Tanya isn’t dangerous. Lushion says he’ll keep an eye on her. His phone rings. He wants to ignore it, but Natalie tells him to get it. It’s Ian, who wants to talk when Lushion gets off work. Natalie suggests Lushion invite him for dinner, and Ian in says, okay. Lushion asks Natalie why she wants him to come over, and she says she wants him to help Kelly. Lushion says she’d better convince him. She turns her back to him, but he says she’s not sleeping now, and kisses the back of her neck.

At their apartment, Marcie asks Brad if he’s working today. He says he’s stopping by the house for Alex to sign the divorce papers first. He doesn’t think there will be a problem. She says that’s better than Randal. Brad asks how she got him to sign them, and she says she’s calling Larry, and asking him. As long as she’s free. Hallelujah! He thanks her for last night. Esperanza calls, and Marcie asks how Kelly is. Esperanza thinks she’s better, but she’s going to try and get more details today. She heard Randal signed the divorce papers, and asks how Marcie got him to do that. Marcie says, it wasn’t easy. Esperanza asks who helped her, and Marcie says, a lawyer. Esperanza says, the one who tied Eddie up? He’s so weird. Marcie doesn’t care; she’s free. Esperanza needs help, and Marcie asks, what kind? She needs to find a way to threaten Eddie; get him to leave her alone. She can’t do this anymore. She’s exhausted. Marcie asks if she wants Larry’s number, and she says it wouldn’t hurt.

Marcie calls Larry, and asks what he did. How did he get Randal to sign the papers. Larry says, it’s done. Marcie says, Ian said he filed them, so it’s legal now? She’s divorced? He says she doesn’t have to worry, and she says Randal is mad as hell. Larry says, he’ll calm him down. He thinks knows Randal pretty well. Marcie says she didn’t know Randal was into… Larry says, Randal had quite a past. She says, like what? Like what he did to Eddie? Larry says, something like that. She says, S&M? Larry says, that’s on him, not Randal. She says, not that it matters, but she would have liked to have known. Larry says she can trust him. Her ex was a bit of a swinger. Marcie says, whatever Larry did, she thanks him. He says it was the least he could do. She hopes it doesn’t come back to haunt her, but Larry says, it won’t. She tells him that she has a friend who needs legal advice, and she’s going to give him a call. She thanks him again. She looks at her empty ring finger.

On the phone, Randal asks what do they mean, telling him it’s filed. What if he didn’t know what he was signing? He says, go to the judge. What if his attorney tricked him into signing. It’s his word against the judge’s? Go to hell. He calls Larry’s office, and says, bitch, you know who this is. He calls all the time. Hello? I die laughing for the second time.

Alex and Natalie see the kids off at the bus stop. Natalie asks how Alex is, and Alex says, okay. Alex says, Justice looked okay. She asks if he knows, and Natalie says, no. He keeps asking to talk to her though. They’ll have to tell him something, but they’re waiting to see that Kelly is doing better. She asks if Randal is still bothering Alex, and Alex says she’s going to let him see the baby. Natalie asks if she’s sure, and Alex says, no, but she has to keep the peace somehow. Natalie says they’ve been over this, and Alex says she’s going to do another test. She doesn’t want to talk to him, but it’s her mess. She tells Natalie that Brad is asking for a divorce. She knew that was coming, and she’s not fighting it. She’s so tired of fighting. As long as he takes care of the house, kids, and everything else. Geez. She’s not asking too much. Good luck with that. Natalie is sorry, and Alex says, it’s amazing how one mistake can change your entire life in such an awful way. What can you do? Natalie says, deal with it. Alex says that’s what she’s going to do. Natalie asks if Alex saw Tanya, and Alex asks, what was that? Natalie says, Lushion thinks she’s mentally ill. Speaking of which… Ben runs up to them.

Natalie asks if everything is okay, and Ben says that his fiancé told him that she and the officer had helped. He thanks her, saying it’s better than their last situation. Now they have a police officer and psychologist on the same block. Alex says, Randal? and he says Randal talked to Tanya the other day. Natalie tells him, be careful with him. Everybody’s not what they appear to be. Ben says, okay. Tanya said he came by, so Ben figured he’d introduced himself. Natalie says, it may start that way. Alex asks, what’s going on? and Ben says his fiancé is mentally ill. She has to take lithium. If she doesn’t, she has delusions, and isn’t herself, but he promises they have nothing to worry about. Natalie asks if he’s sure she isn’t dangerous, but he says he tries to stay on her. Alex asks how he can tell when she’s not taking it, and he says she doesn’t know until she has a breakdown. He wants to trust her. Alex says she’s sorry, and Ben asks if she’s doing better today. She says she is, and asks how long they’ve been married. Since he’s been saying, fiancé, apparently she’s not listening. He says they’ve been together since high school. She just got sick a few years ago. Alex asks if it came out of nowhere, and he says, her mother had it, but they figured she wouldn’t. Natalie is sorry, and Ben says, just deal with it. Natalie tells him that they were just saying that. Ben gives them his number in case he’s at work and Tanya needs him. Natalie says he didn’t give it to Randal, did he? He says he was headed there next, and she tells him, hold off on that. Ben asks, why? Isn’t he a good guy? Natalie says, hell no. he’s crazy as hell. She lists all his psychoses, and tells Ben to keep his distance. Ben suggests she tell him how she really feels. He says he’ll stay away, and thanks them. He tells Alex that he’s glad she’s doing better, and he goes back home.

Brad pulls up. Alex asks if he wants to come in, and he says, unless she’s signing in front of the neighborhood. They’ll need a witness, and he asks Natalie. Alex says, it’s okay; she agreed to sign the papers. He’s brought a notary with him. They go inside.

Brad shows her where to sign, and I wonder if she doesn’t want to read it. Alex asks if Brad is sure he wants to do this, and he says he’s never been so sure of anything. Alex says she needs to read it first. Thank you. He says all she needs to know is, he’s divorcing her. She says she needs to read it, and he says he’ll wait. She says she needs a lawyer; someone to look at it. He says he’s not messing around, and she says, wait. Natalie suggests giving it a day. Let someone look at it. Brad says, after what she’s done? After everything she’s done, she doesn’t deserve the courtesy.  Natalie says, Ian could look at it; a day won’t matter. She won’t be a witness if Brad won’t let Alex talk with somebody. He says, it’s ridiculous, and tells Alex, 24 hours. Um… that’s not how any of this works. He leaves, and Alex cries. Natalie is sorry, and Alex says, it is what it is. She thanks Natalie, who says she should let Ian look at it. Alex says, okay, and Natalie tells her that he’s coming over for dinner. She can ask him then. She says, it’s going to be all right, and hugs Alex.

Outside Kelly’s room, Lushion asks if Rick was there all night. Rick says he was, and he’s staying there the rest of the day. He wants to be there when Kelly wakes up. Lushion asks, what’s going on? and Rick says he’s doing his job. Lushion isn’t buying it; there’s something else. Rick says he screwed up. He should have taken her more seriously. Lushion says, like when she told him about Travis? Now he’s feeling guilty? Rick says he went to Travis’s father’s church too, and Lushion wonders if everybody in Maxine goes there. Rick says, he’s a powerful man. Lushion says, his son was sick. Rick says he worked security for the church, and has information. Lushion asks if it’s on Travis, and Rick says he’s trying to get proof. The place is locked down like a cult. They’re coming for her; that he knows. Lushion says he needs everything he can get if. If Rick gets any information, he wants to know.

Lushion goes in to see Kelly. She says she slept so long, and he says she probably needed it. She says she doesn’t need to be chained up. Lushion looks around, and uncuffs her. She cries, and thanks him. He says, don’t tell anybody. She sits up, and he helps her out of bed. He tells her, don’t go too far; get her bearings. She asks how Justice is, and if they told him. Lushion says Natalie is looking after Justice, and they didn’t. She can’t believe she’s going to jail for the rest of her life, but Lushion says they’re not letting that happen. She says she told Rick about the chaplain who showed up. She goes to Travis’s church, and said there were other women. Lushion asks what her name is, and Kelly says, Margaret. He says Rick knows someone there too, and he’s working on getting information. He has more good news. Ian is going to rep her. Kelly claps her hands together, and asks if he’s really good. Lushion says, yes, but his partner reps the church. She asks how they can trust him, and Lushion says they’re having him over for dinner tonight. He’ll keep a close eye on him. She says what she wouldn’t give for a good breakfast. Lushion says it’s not a crime; he’ll get her one. He has to cuff her again, but she says it’s her, and where would she be going? He says if a nurse sees, he’ll get in trouble, but he’ll go to the cafeteria and be right back. He tells her, at least get in bed, and cover up. If anyone comes in, they won’t know she’s not handcuffed. She gets in, and pulls up the covers, and he leaves.

Esperanza calls Larry. She says she needs to speak to a good lawyer, and he says, at her service. She says she has a lot of crazy information about her ex, and wonders if there’s a way to get him to leave her alone. Larry tells her, start with his name, and she says, Edward Willis. He says, the officer? The one he tied up? It was of Eddie’s own accord. She knows he’s not into Eddie, but she needs to find a way to threaten him, so she can live her life. She can’t live like this. He tells her, come by the office.

Randal comes out of nowhere, and starts punching Larry. Where is the bitch secretary Randal is always complaining about? Randal is going to ask him one time only. Did he trick him into signing the divorce papers? Larry says he didn’t trick Randal, and Randal asks how he got them signed. Larry says, the situation is completely unhealthy, and Randal says he’s getting Larry’s ass disbarred. Larry tells him, calm down. Randal will thank him one day. Randal asks, why? and Larry says he’s locked in the past. They’ve always looked out for each other. Someone looks in, and Larry says he’s good. Larry say he knows what Marcie had on Randal.  With the emotional distress alone, she could take all that he has. She lost the baby, and was going to come at him for murder. All the pain and suffering he caused her; he’s seen stranger things happen. Randal says, don’t speak to him again. Larry says, don’t do this, but Randal says, never. Larry tells him, he has to let it go; it’s no good. Randal walks out.

Lushion returns to Kelly’s room, saying he’s brought the breakfast of champions, but Kelly is gone. Lushion says, damn it, Kelly.

Next time, Esperanza meets with Eddie; Eddie tells Esperanza if he can’t have her, no one can; Marcie is past done dealing with Randal; Randal spies on Tanya; Tanya doesn’t want to talk to Randal again; and Esperanza asks Larry if he can hire someone to kill him. I assume she means Eddie.

🌅 Get Me Some Glue…

It’s come to this. Up all night and bad jokes.




April 3, 2019 – Franco Gives Cameron The Talk, Another Holiday In the Berkshires, Sad Feud & Flooding


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Elizabeth sees Franco in the locker room. They kiss and she asks why he showered. He says he got paint all over him, going too far with the Jackson Pollack thing. Elizabeth asks if he remembered to talk to Cameron. He says he forgot, and she says he saw Trina in court. She’s pretty sure they all shared a room in Niagara Falls. She thinks it would be best for Cameron to hear advice from his stepfather. Franco says she might want to rethink that. He’s the last person who should be giving Cameron advice.

At Charlie’s, Trina says Cameron can thank her any time. Josslyn asks what he’s thanking her for, and he says showing up at his court appearance. Josslyn feels bad that she and Oscar weren’t there, but Trina says it seems they had something more important to do. She saw them at the county clerk’s office; why? Oscar comes in, and Julian assumes he’s there to hang with his friends, not bus tables. Oscar says as much as he’d like to work, he’d have to turn back the clock to do it.

Sonny punches a bag at the gym. Michael says whoever he’s going after, doesn’t stand a chance. Sonny says he’s hoping he punches Kristina out of DOD. Shiloh is the target. Michael says, no matter how good it might feel, going after Shiloh will only push her further away.

Shiloh tells Kristina they missed her at the seminar. He can see there’s something on her mind, and asks if there’s something she’d like to share. She wasn’t sure if he’d change his mind after Jason attacked him. He says he forgave Jason, and thinks she should do the same. She says in getting rid of the toxic people in her life, she’s become more dedicated to DOD. She says she recorded it herself. It’s something about her family, and if it came out, it would be devastating. Shiloh tells her to make sure it’s something she wants to do. Once she joins the Trust, there’s no turning back. She says she’s ready, and hands him the envelope. For the life of me, I can’t figure out what this secret is, and I’m pretty sure I’ve seen them all.

Jason is on the footbridge. Sam joins him, and asks, how mad is he at her? He says she left Danny with Shiloh. How mad should he be? She asks him to at least hear her out. She went to Kelly’s with Danny. Brad was there, and she asked to hold the baby. Wiley puked on her, and Danny felt he was too big to go to the ladies room with her. Shiloh walked in, and said he’d look after him. She couldn’t refuse, or it would look suspicious. Jason says, Danny is eight, and thinks Shiloh is her friend. Who knows what Shiloh might do to get Danny to trust him? He knows she’s on a mission, but he wants to be clear. Shiloh does not go near Danny again. If it blows her cover, there are other ways to get Kristina out of there.

Margaux sits at Charlie’s, and opens the DOD book. Julian tells Oscar that their food is on the house. Oscar sits, and tells them the nachos are on the house. Josslyn says, just in time, and Trina says Josslyn was about to tell them what she and Oscar were doing in the county clerk’s office. Oscar says, she saw them? and Josslyn says, she was at Cameron’s hearing. Cameron says Oscar wasn’t getting a permit, and he’s not on jury duty. What else can you do at the courthouse?

Franco tells Elizabeth, the last thing Cameron needs, given his history, is him offering advice or acting like a pillar of society. She says the boys see how Franco treats her, with love and respect. It’s important. He’s teaching them to be good, caring, responsible young men. He says if it makes her feel good, it’s all that matters. She says he has a way of talking to kids, and he says she knows best. He’ll try not to disappoint her. She tells him to just be himself. She leaves, and he looks in the mirror. He says, you heard her. Just be yourself, only better.

Michael tells Sonny, Kristina thinks Shiloh walks on water. They can’t force Kristina to choose because she’ll choose DOD. She needs to know there’s an alternative a way out with dignity. Sonny says, that’s his exit plan? Michael says, it might be.

Shiloh appreciates Kristina trusting him. She says it’s something she’s never shared, not even with Parker, and there would be dire consequences if it ever got out. She says, it never will, right? He says, trust works both ways. If she’s faithful to DOD, they won’t disappoint her. She’s cleared the final hurdle in record time. She can join her place beside him in the Trust. She asks when they start, and he tells her to have patience. It needs time, planning, preparation, and also money – $10,000 – but since she did such a fantastic job with outreach, he’s willing to let her do monthly payments, with a $2500 down payment. She says he never mentioned it was $10K, and he asks if it’s made a difference in her commitment. She says, no, and he tells her, it goes directly to outreach to help more people. She says she doesn’t have the money. She has money in a trust, but can’t touch it until she’s thirty. Wow. They really don’t trust her. She can ask her boss for extra shifts, but what if she can’t get the money? Shiloh tells her to never underestimate herself. He’s so proud of how far she’s come. She should be proud of where she’s going. He has faith in her. She leaves, and he looks at the recorder.

Sam tells Jason that Kristina was freaking out when she heard what he did to Shiloh. She got it more than he did. She knows Jason can kill him. If anything happens to Shiloh, she wonders what will happen to Kristina. Jason asks how they can break his hold without risk to Danny, and she suggests leaving the kids at his mother’s house. He says, or they can take Kristina out of Dawn of Day right now. Sam says that’s a last resort; if nothing else works. He says, nothing has worked so far. How much longer is she playing this out? Sam’s phone rings. It’s Shiloh. She says she was hoping hear to from him. He says he promised to tell her when her soul was ready for the next step of the journey. The time is now.

Sam tells Shiloh that she was afraid after what happened, he didn’t want to mentor her anymore. He says she reminded him that forgiveness is the key to a lighter heart. That’s when he realized her soul was ready for the next step to enlightenment. She asks when they begin, and he says, now. She says, as in tonight? He says, why wait? He’ll be expecting her. She tells Jason that Shiloh says she’s ready for the next step. He says he has to talk to Sonny. Sam asks him to tell Sonny how fragile Kristina is, and the best way out is if she chooses to go herself. They can’t drive her out. Jason says, sometimes you have to go with whatever works, and Sam asks him to please buy her more time.

Julian didn’t think Kristina was working today, and she says she was just checking her challenged bank account. She can use the tip money. He thought everything was fine since she was living in the DOD house, and she says she’s fine with her living expenses. She has a chance to invest in her future; it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity. He asks how much she needs, and she says $10K.

Cameron asks if Oscar was making a will. Oscar says, something like that. They want to tie some things up while they still can. Cameron says, that’s not vague, and Trina says, some things are between a couple, and they don’t want share. As friends, they should respect their privacy. Josslyn asks what’s new on the community service front? Any challenging assignments? Cameron says, girls are weird. Oscar thinks Josslyn and Trina are brilliant.

Bobbie and Elizabeth look at the photos on the wall at GH. Bobbie says Gail would have been thrilled with the envelope hunt. She’s glad to hear she was an inspiration to Elizabeth. Elizabeth asks if Lucy has recruited Bobbie to the Nurses’ Ball, and Bobbie says, not yet, but every year it’s the same thing; she gets roped in. Elizabeth says she and her family have had enough of the spotlight for this year. Bobbie says she has her hands full with her sons. It never gets old or easy. Elizabeth asks if there’s anything Bobbie would like to share. She’d like to hear it.

Sonny asks if Michael is going to pretend to join DOD. He doesn’t want Michael to get sucked in. Michael says obviously he can be conned, but his weakness is saving people, not being saved. He and Kristina have always been close, and complained about their crazy extended family. She’s used to him being the voice of reason. Sonny asks if Michael wants him to back off. Michael says he doesn’t want them lining up against Kristina. She’ll never openly admit it if she wants to leave, and needs a neutral person to take her in when she has nowhere left to go. He wants to reassure her that she’s loved, and no matter what, he’ll be there for her.

At the DOD house, Shiloh is impressed that Sam was ready when he called. It speaks about her level of commitment. She asks what he wants her to do; take a seminar or class? He appreciates her enthusiasm, but tonight, it’s just them, one on one. He tells her, the key to embracing the light of dawn is to embrace the unexpected; embrace the darkness. He asks if she trusts him, and she says, completely. He starts to blindfold her, and she says, wait a minute.

Elizabeth asks if there’s anything Bobbie wishes she had done differently. Bobbie says, only about a million things. At the top of her list is her denial when Lucas came out. If she had a redo, she’d make sure he knew she loved him for what he was, not who she wanted him to be. It’s her biggest regret. Elizabeth says she wants to handle things right with Aiden too. Bobbie asks if she thinks he’s gay, but Elizabeth says, he’s so young, she doesn’t want to assume. No matter who he is or becomes, she doesn’t want him to doubt he’s surrounded by love.

Trina says Cameron lost his license until the end of his probation, but she’s getting hers if they want to go on another trip. Cameron says he can’t go anywhere, and he’s been demoted to garbage detail for dereliction of duty. He never returned the book cart, thinking it was more important to spend time with them. Josslyn says his tragic flaw is that he only sees two options. Her dad says there are almost always other options; you just have to look for them. Cameron’s phone rings. It’s Franco. He doesn’t want to answer, but Trina wonders what happened to peaceful co-existence. He tells Franco not to worry; he’ll make his community service, but Franco says they need to talk. He tells Cameron to come to GH, and he’ll meet him. He practically hangs up on Cameron, and Cameron says he has to go. Trina leaves with him, and when they’re outside, he asks why she walked him out. She says to give Oscar and Josslyn alone time. Time is precious, and they only have so much to spend eating nachos with them. Cameron says, Oscar doesn’t look well. She says he wants to act like everything is normal, and they have to act like they believe him.

Oscar thought they’d never leave. He and Josslyn head out. Julian tells Kristina, that’s a lot of cash. Why doesn’t she go to her parents? She says she doesn’t want to be beholding (who uses that word?) to her family. He says it might be better than being beholding to him, but she says, as long as she’s working, he knows she’s good for it. Michael approaches, and asks if there’s something wrong. Julian says, it’s nothing. They’re just talking about his sister’s future. Julian excuses himself, and Michael asks if Kristina is okay. She knows she’s fallen behind in repaying him, but he’ll get the money. She asks him to be patient, but he says he’s not here for that. If she’s having troubles, maybe he can help.

Julian sees Margaux reading, and asks if she’s investigating the author or the organization. She asks if he thinks there’s something to investigate.

Jason holds the bag for Sonny. Sonny says Michael is worried that if he handles Shiloh, he’ll push Kristina away. Jason says Sam feels the same way. She said Kristina was freaking after he roughed up Shiloh. Sonny says it’s not like him to lose control, and Jason says he didn’t. He saw Shiloh talking to Danny, and wanted to scare him bad enough not go near Danny again. Sonny asks if it worked, but Jason’s not sure. Shiloh’s ego is huge, and the more time that passes, the more time Shiloh has to convince himself he can handle Jason. Sonny says that’s why they’ve got to move now. Jason tells him, Sam is asking for more time.

Shiloh tells Sam, it’s disappointing. She failed the test before she began. She doesn’t think he understands. She wants to feel empowered, and put it on herself. He says there’s the Sam he thought he knew. She takes it and blindfolds herself. She says, ready? Shiloh looks at her. She asks what he’s doing, and he says, looking at her. Does it make her nervous? She says, a little. He tells her, sense the energy passing between them. Can she feel it? He stands behind her, and asks again if she feels it. They’re not even touching. She says she can feel it. He says, good. He knew she would.

Cameron meets Franco, and Franco says he realizes Cameron’s not a kid anymore. He’s a young man, and it’s only natural for him to develop feelings for a young woman. The feelings might lead him to a situation that will affect them both. Cameron says he had health class in middle school. Ha-ha! I remember health class. Cameron tries to jet, and Franco says, what happens in class is different that situations he’ll encounter. There’s more to sex than health and hygiene. He tells Cameron, sit down. Forgive him. Please sit down. He understands it’s different for someone his age than it was for him at Cameron’s age. Sex is probably the same, but he has the internet and sexting. He wants Cameron to understand it has nothing to do with a loving, true relationship. Cameron says he’s not into that stuff. Franco says #metoo is real, and there has to be mutual respect. Cameron says, no means no; he gets it. Can he go? Franco says they’re just getting started.

On the footbridge, Oscar thanks Josslyn for not telling Cameron and Trina they were asking for a marriage license. Josslyn says it was nice of the clerk not to laugh in their faces. Oscar says, come back when you’re older, and they both laugh. He says he’s not getting any older. Josslyn says she’s his forever, without or without a marriage certificate. He wants to give her something more to remember him by. He won’t need this on his locker anymore. Josslyn says, from a bullet necklace to a lock. He says it’s for the bridge, like the lovers’ locks in Paris. A symbol of their love. They can start on their own bridge.

Julian tells Margaux that DOD seems to do good work in the community. They’re in and out all day long. One of his bartenders is a member. She says, what about him? Is he open to the movement? He says he’s a businessman, not a philosopher. He’s just asking because he hopes they focus on the Ryan Chamberlain case. She says that the officials in the US and Canada have closed the case, but it’s still open there. All she can tell him is, it’s an ongoing search and investigation. Julian is sure a lot of cases will take priority, but his sister can’t sleep without fear. They need to get motivated.

Kristina asks Michael if she’s hearing right. He wants to help her? He says, no strings attached. She asks how she can trust him. That Willow poisoned him against them. He says he’s still her brother, and he doesn’t want to fight with her. He wants to be someone she feels safe with.

Sonny says that everything Jason is telling him is saying get rid of this guy, but it could push Kristina away. Jason says Sam thinks Shiloh could do worse. Sonny wonders if something happens, like an accident, would Kristina blame him or think he’s behind it? Jason says Sam thinks they can convince her to get out on her own. Sonny says Michael thinks he can lead Kristina to the exit. He doesn’t know if their plans will work, but they have to give it time.

Shiloh says, the first step in letting go is to do whatever you feel. What does she feel? I laugh to myself, wondering what he’d do if she stomped on his foot.

Josslyn asks Oscar for the combination. He asks if she remembers when he first told her that he loved her. She says when she gave him the compass, and Oscar says, when they thought they had all the time in the world. Josslyn says, some people grow old and grey, and don’t have what they do. He says it’s the date, and she says, June 26, 6-2-6. She opens it and asks what they do now. He says, put it on the rail and lock it. She has an idea.

Franco tells Cameron that he made a vow to be the best person and partner to his mother. That means raising her boys to be better men than he was. So if there were someone special… Cameron asks, why is everyone making assumptions? Franco says he needs to listen. Pressure tactics are no bueno. Take his time. Cameron says it was a good talk, and jets for real. Franco says, that went great.

Oscar says, forever, and Josslyn tells him, try not to smear it. What now? He gives it to her, and she hooks it onto the rail. He says, no matter where she goes, or what she does, the lock will remain. Even if it rusts, it will keep a spot with her love for him safe forever; secure. The lock says, J+O forever. She locks it.

Margaux asks when was Julian granted the authority to pick and choose what they investigate, and what they should ignore? She’s seen his rap sheet, and his sister’s. He says he’s used to people taking pot shots at his family. She understands his feelings, and regrets what his sister is going through. She says, tell Ava that they’re doing everything possible to ensure that Ryan is found. She leaves, and Julian ponders.

Shiloh asks if Sam is afraid of him. She says she’s afraid of something, and he asks, what? She says, how great this feels. He almost touches her face, but takes the blindfold off. He says she did well for the first time. She asks, will there be another time? and he says he’ll let her know. She leaves.

Franco calls Elizabeth, and she takes it he talked to Cameron. He says Cameron was anxious, but he calmed him down. She thinks he crushed it, and he says it’s tough being a stand-up guy. She says he must tell her his secret.

Oscar tells Josslyn, now people will wonder who they are. Think of the stories they’ll invent. They might think they’re star-crossed lovers. Who knows? Maybe more people will add locks, and keep doing it like in Paris. Josslyn says, anything is possible. He asks if it isn’t customary to kiss the bride, and they kiss.

Kristina tells Julian, business is picking up, and he says, sure is. He hands her an envelope, saying, for her investment. He knows she’s good for it. She hugs him, and says, do her a favor. Don’t mention it to her father. Julian says, because he speaks to him all the time. Michael watches.

Jason tells Sonny maybe he’ll uncover something they can use against Shiloh. Sonny asks how much time he needs to get things in place. There’s an option he hasn’t explored. He thinks he may know somebody who can help them.

Shiloh watches a video of what just happened with Sam.

Sam sees Margaux on her way into DOD. Margaux asks if Sam is taking a class, and Sam says she just finished a session. Margaux says she’s about to take one herself. She continues on. Sam shakes her head, and keeps walking.

Tomorrow, Carly says there are some things you never forget, Laura tells Doc that Alexis gave her the divorce papers, and Josslyn calls for paramedics. That must have been some kiss. Sorry. I had to.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Dale and Tinsley go to the cosmetic specialist. Tinsley has stress, and has been grinding her teeth. She’s been swishing vodka around in her mouth for the pain. Oops, I swallowed some. She heard Botox can be used to relieve the pressure, and she’s all for it. She tells Sale about the dog fashion coming up, that benefits Best Friends. It’s a baby step to get her back into the NYC charity circuit. We see a clip of her at the adoption center. She says she’s happy to get back involved in rescue, but she’s terrified about public speaking.

The doctor says Tinsley and Dale look like sisters, and Tinsley says, thanks a lot. He says he meant it as a compliment to her mother. He certainly did. Lovely as Dale looks, Tinsley would have to be a half-sister from a second marriage many years later. She explains to the doctor that she has TMJ and nerve damage, and has heard Botox can relieve the tension. In her interview, she says the stress began once her relationship ended, and she ended up with a mug shot. She thinks it’s now coming from her relationship with Scott. She asks the doctor if he can also freeze her forehead. Might as well, since she’s there. In Dale’s interview, she says they love Botox, and have used it in every conceivable place. I don’t want to know.

Sonja and Ramona meet for a walk. Sonja is living on Columbus Circle and it’s gorgeous, but it’s also like living in a rave all the time. She has no FOMO because she’s in the middle of everything. Ramona tells Sonja about her blind date. She says, he was worldly, and Sonja says she means not gorgeous, but smart. It’s like saying a woman has a nice personality. Ramona says, he’s never been married, which is a red flag, but also never even lived with a woman. She was like, next. She says she’s into hot sex. In her interview, Sonja says Ramona is a dating monster. Sonja is tired, busy, maybe next month, or call me when you’re divorced. Ramona says Dorinda is in a good place, and in her interview, says she’s hoping they can have a laugh again, and gel as a group, Dorinda and LuAnn have mended fences somewhat. She tells Sonja that she’s good with everyone right now, and looking forward to the Berkshires. Sonja isn’t sure Dorinda wants to do the Berkshires. We flash back to Dorinda making it nice and all the other messes during the last trip there. Sonja says, Dorinda has a short memory. It’s like having a baby; you forget, and do it again.

Bethenny tells her assistant Meg that she’s been traveling too much. Even for her, it’s crazy. She’s meeting up with a guy she’s been dating in Boston, and afterward, going to the Berkshires. In Bethenny’s interview, she says she’s seeing where it goes. She’s being pursued by a gentleman, and it’s very refreshing and welcome. Dennis’s passing was traumatic, and it’s a weird time to be dating someone. She wants to see a grief counselor, since she doesn’t want to transfer her grief to the next relationship.

Dr Norman Fried arrives, and he and Bethenny sit on her massive sectional. She says she’s done some therapy in the past, but it’s hard to stick with it because of her crazy schedule. She’s having trouble breathing. Dr. Norman says that we all grieve differently. You think you’re getting worse, but you’re really rising to a higher vantage point. Bethenny says it’s different for her than his ex-wife, who had to deal with the funeral details. She didn’t feel like she had an identity, and would wake up asking if he was really dead. She’s going through denial, since an OD is different than an illness. Dr. Norma says with an illness, you have the grace of a warning. With something like this, your life changes in an instant. She says in an instant her life changed. Dennis was someone she went to for everything, and it’s a massive void. He was a powerful force in their lives; her daughter loved him too. It’s hard to extricate herself from it. She had just said the Saturday before that she wanted off the ride. She feels guilty that she couldn’t until he died. She hopes she had nothing to do with it. In her interview, she explains that Dennis told her, if it didn’t work out, he’d be alone for the rest of his life. It was tremendous pressure, and she’ll always have to live with it. She tells the therapist that she feels guilty for feeling better. She makes decisions based on what he’d want. She’s dating, but she was dating before, and wonders how he’d feel about that. Dr. Norman says grief is different for everyone, and there’s no roadmap. Loving someone else is a testament to Dennis. She wants to feel the love again, and is honoring the love he taught her to feel. A relationship might help her grieve more. It’s not like she’s hiding it; she’s facing her fears. She says she wants to have a family unit, and told him what she wanted, but he couldn’t do it. In her interview, she says she lost someone she depended on as a father, brother, friend, and lover, and it’s not fair. Whether it was romantic or not, he was still her person. Dr. Norman says, if she has a bad day, have it. If she has a good day, cherish it. It will give her strength for the bad days. She says she feels better, and they hug.

Tinsley arrives at the fashion show with Bambi. She explains she adopted Bambi when she was working with the Humane Society. He seems grateful for his new life, and she wants to help other dogs in his situation. Dorinda shows up next. In her interview, Dorinda says that she just lost her dog. Lucy died when she was fifteen. Afterward, she had a vivid dream about Richard, saw Lucy’s face pop up, and thought, she’s home. That’s a happy ending. Ramona and Sonja walk in together. Ramona is miffed because she’s wearing jeans, and everyone else is more dressed up. LuAnn comes to cheer them on. Dorinda is happy that LuAnn is coming to the Berkshires. We see a clip of Barbara telling LuAnn about getting kicked out of Dorinda’s apartment, and wondering if she’s still invited. LuAnn says she’s nervous, but needs to get over the drama and move on. Dorinda says she’s hired a naked chef. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she loves decorations, and likes to step it up every year. This time, she has a naked chef. Sonja says, this one’s for Ramona. Ramona says she has a friend whose boat is docked nearby, and she invited all of them for lunch. Dorinda has to leave for the Berkshires. LuAnn goes to get coffee for everyone.

Ramona thinks it’s a great idea that LuAnn is coming without Bethenny or Barbara. In her interview, Dorinda says, despite the tension, she invited Barbara, but she’s not coming until the second day. She wants to talk to LuAnn without an outside voice. Maybe they’ll get somewhere. LuAnn tells Ramona that she has a chance to kill it on the runway. In Ramona’s interview, she says the first time she was on a runway, she was a deer in headlights. We flash back to her looking insane and robotic. She says this time she has Coco with her, and she feels good. Tinsley is introduced, and explains the fashion show is for Best Friends Strut Your Mut, and the proceeds go to the adoption center. Sonja and Marley are first, and then Dorinda, with the star of the show, Mathilda. In her interview, Tinsley says she wants to get back to the things she used to do, and feel how she used to feel. This is encouraging, and makes her feel be like the girl she used to be, and feel like herself again. Sonja and Ramona put their dogs in a little car.

Bethenny meets the other girls near the yacht. In Ramona’s interview, she says she met Deborah years ago in Southampton, and she never turns down an invite to lunch on a yacht. Bethenny asks if Dorinda told them about the naked chef, and Dorinda says Ramona is ready. They discuss eating sushi off of a naked person. Oddly enough, that’s what they’re having for lunch, but it’s on a plate. Tinsley doesn’t like Scott being with Dale. We flash back to Dale telling Tinsley that she told Scott to jump ship if it’s not working out. Bethenny asks if she wants kids, and we find out Tinsley is forty-three, and she and Scott have been together two years. Bethenny says that’s forty-three in dog years. Tinsley says she thinks about the relationship first, and kids second. LuAnn asks if they love each other; she’s not hearing that. Tinsley says just because she doesn’t share, doesn’t mean it’s not happening. She says they’ve had a logistical problem. She’s trying to build up her NYC life again, and it doesn’t make sense for her to be in Chicago. In Bethenny’s interview, she feels badly that they’re grilling Tinsley, but they’re basic questions. They haven’t even gotten to the hard sh*t yet. She asks if Tinsley is 100% sure that Scott is going to marry her. Tinsley doesn’t think you can ever be 100% sure, but Bethenny says she would know. Tinsley says he showed her pictures of the ring. In her interview, Ramona asks, what man shows a woman pictures? He knows she wants commitment, and Ramona thinks he’s playing with her. Tinsley says until she gets a ring, she’s not leaving New York. Bethenny asks if he’d bolt with an ultimatum, but Tinsley doesn’t think he does well with threats. Bethenny says, it’s not about him; it’s about her. Tinsley says, in her mind, she has a timeline. In Sonja’s interview, she says, Tinsley is manipulating the situation so much, she can’t see what’s really happening. She’s hoping it will all pan out. Sonja said her piece with Dale, so she’s staying quiet and eating the shrimp. LuAnn asks, what’s wrong with being honest? and Bethenny says they care about her, and have no dog in this fight. Ramona says Tinsley is acting defensive, and Tinsley feels like her relationship is under a microscope. In Ramona’s interview, she says, it doesn’t seem like Tinsley has the relationship she wants with Scott. That’s why she’s nervous answering questions. Ramona says they’re just giving her a reality check. LuAnn had blinders on. Bethenny says Tinsley has body issues, and they think she looks great. Maybe she doesn’t know how good, smart, and beautiful she is. She’s not getting what she deserves. Tinsley says she and Scott do talk about the future, and they toast to dreams coming true. She says they’re worse than her mother. Bethenny tells her, you gotta love yourself. Listen to Justin Bieber.

Dorinda gets ready for Halloween in the Berkshires with housekeeper Len. In her interview, Dorinda says Bluestone Manor is great at Christmas; imagine Halloween there. Cauldrons, eyeballs, dead people… clowns. She sets up a mummy. Sonja and Ramona are coming early. She likes people arriving at different times, so she can see the reaction over and over.

Sonja, Ramona, and Tinsley ride in together.

Dorinda’s sister, Melinda, brings her some vegetables. In her interview, Dorinda says her sister is the authentic farm to table person. She grows her own vegetables, and collects stray pets. And like Dorinda, she’s an equal opportunity holiday decorator. We see a clip of her playing Santa at Dorinda’s party. Melinda thinks the ball with a head inside is haunted. Dorinda says that’s why she took it out of the house. It’s great, but effed up. Melinda says if she brings it in, there will be bad juju in the house. Dorinda asks why Melinda gave it to her, and Melinda says she knows Dorinda likes Halloween.

Ramona, Tinsley, and Sonja screech over the decorations. Ramona says one looks like Bethenny crying, because she’s the rudest human being on the face of the earth. Sonja says she has more decorations than in a store. Tinsley asks if Dorinda isn’t scared having all this stuff around. Ramona shows Tinsley a sign that says, good vibes only, and says that’s the theme for the weekend. Dorinda says Tinsley is the least of their worries. She didn’t think LuAnn was in a good mood, and thought LuAnn wanted to chat with her. She says she’s a bedroom short. Ramona wants Hannah’s room, but Dorinda says she’s giving it to Bethenny, who’s coming later. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, Bethenny just lost her best friend. She gets nervous as a guest, like her. It’s a loss of control. She wants to make sure Bethenny feels safe, happy, and secure. Ramona asks, who’s staying in the fish room? In her interview, she says Dorinda doesn’t realize it’s the least desirable room. It’s like being punished; it pays to come early. Dorinda says, LuAnn can have that room. Ramona says, you snooze, you lose, and that means LuAnn is sleeping with the fishes. Sonja says she’s going to have a hard time sleeping after seeing the decorations. Marley is not impressed.

They get to the restaurant at the Wheatley Hotel. Dorinda thinks it’s the perfect spot to reintroduce LuAnn to the Berkshires. In her interview, she says it’s the first time LuAnn is back in the Berkshires, and she thinks LuAnn will be comfortable there. It’s very European. LuAnn arrives, and in her interview, she says it’s strange to be back at Dorinda’s house after everything that’s happened. She thinks it will be fun. They shook hands, but LuAnn’s not ready to sleep with her. LuAnn says they’re missing some girls, and asks if Barbara is coming. Dorinda says she is. In her interview, she says she’s glad Barbara is coming later. She wants to work on her relationship with Dorinda, and keep Barbara out of it. Dorinda talks about where they’re going tomorrow. They’re touring a Morgan house, and the naked chef is coming at seven. LuAnn asks about getting a massage. In Dorinda’s interview, she says LuAnn has mistaken her home for an inn. She’s not getting angry. If she has to do extra, she’ll do it. She’s more interested in repairing the relationship. LuAnn says don’t tell her that she’s in the fish room, and they all laugh like a pod of dolphins. She says she’s going to freak out. In her interview, LuAnn says they all woke up with the worst hangover in that room. You’d think they’d remember that. Dorinda gets up to go to the bathroom or something (okay, I spaced out). LuAnn gripes, after all that happened, Dorinda puts her in the fish room. Sonja thinks it’s great. She tells LuAnn not to insult Dorinda, and LuAnn says she will if she feels like it, because we’re seven. Dorinda comes back, and Ramona asks about the room Dorinda gave Bethenny. Dorinda says, LuAnn doesn’t like the shark room? LuAnn can’t believe Bethenny isn’t coming until tomorrow, and gets the nicest room. In Dorinda’s interview, she doesn’t know why LuAnn is acting entitled and angry about the room. She’s a guest, that’s enough. Say, thank you. She tells them that Bethenny was going to stay in a hotel, but said she’d stay at Dorinda’s if she could have that room. LuAnn complains about getting the short end of the stick. Dorinda says, there are no bad rooms. LuAnn is acting like it’s a shack. LuAnn asks if she’s ever heard of the saying, it’s the thought that counts. Which totally doesn’t apply here. She has an empty room tonight, and is saving it for Bethenny. LuAnn drove from upstate to get there, and after the sh*t they’ve been through, it would be nice of her to make the gesture. In LuAnn’s interview, she says she and Dorinda are supposed to make new memories., and putting her in the same room brings her to the past. She’s seen enough dead fish to last her lifetime. Tinsley says she’ll take it, but LuAnn argues about this too, and bitches some more. She asks why Ramona and Sonja don’t stay in the fish room, and stomps off, still muttering about the fish room.

Next time, Dorinda tells Bethenny about LuAnn’s complaints, the naked chef comes, Sonja cries over the house tour, and tells Ramona not to touch the Morgan letters.

💔 It’s a Stalemate…

Here’s the Kyle/LVP fight in a nutshell. I was so bummed after watching it last night. It’s a slideshow, and I find them annoying, but they had some great pictures.

🏊  It’s Not Just the Water Rising…

So are my flood insurance rates.

April 2, 2019 – Gail’s Last Indulgence, Worst Fight Ever, Eddie’s Plan Backfires, Potomac Return, Poor Dorit, a Bowl of Puppies & Charming Alan


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

We see everyone gathering on the tenth floor at the hospital. Scotty wonders who didn’t get an invite. Alexis asks if he’s ready. He doesn’t think he’ll ever be ready, but tells her, carry on. Alexis thanks everyone for coming to honor the final wishes of their beloved Gail Baldwin. She hands out envelopes, saying they each contain a piece of the original blueprint of GH as it was when it opened. Her instructions are to go to the location, and find an envelope with their name on it. Bring it back to the tenth floor, intact. Scotty says, no peeking. Monica says, the hospital has changed a lot. Some of the spaces are gone or there’s something else there. Leslie asks if she’s not up to the challenge, and Monica says, watch her. Maxie loves a scavenger hunt, and Lucy loves a mysterious envelope. Alexis says if they didn’t have the privilege of knowing Gail, they were invited with a special privilege. Bobbie asks what if they can’t find their envelope? Alexis says it’s important that they do. Scotty says he was in the habit of not listening to Gail, and every time he didn’t, it was a disaster. So he’s going to listen one last time while he has the privilege (WOTD) of doing so. Everyone holds up their envelopes, and says, for Gail.

Monica and Leslie both look in the locker room. Leslie says, of course Gail would put them in the same place. Monica says, the old cafeteria, where Leslie interrupted her lunches. Leslie says, it’s nice that they’ve matured. She finds her envelope, and says, hello stranger. Monica says, Gail used to say that all the time, and Leslie adds, even if she saw you the day before. Monica asks if Leslie has seen her envelope, and Leslie says, if she had, she wouldn’t tell her. Monica says, it’s a moot point. She’s found it in the shower. Leslie asks if it’s true the showers are co-ed now, and Monica tells her, welcome to the 21st century. Leslie says, imagine if they’d had them back in the day. Monica would have never left the locker room. No man was safe. Monica says, at least she lived a little. Leslie was busy being a saintly earth mother. Leslie says, it was better than being a slut. Monica asks what Leslie called her, but Leslie says she heard.

Bobbie looks at old pictures on the wall. Felicia expected her envelope to be waiting there, and Bobbie says, her too. Felicia says she misses BJ, but still feels thankful every day for the gift Bobbie gave Maxie. Bobbie says, it was Tony. She couldn’t wrap her head around the fact that BJ was gone, but he knew what had to be done. Felicia says, two little girls could have died that day, but one survived because of the hospital. Bobbie adds, and everyone in it.

Curtis tells Stella that maybe he’s making too much of Jordan going to Mercy. Stella says, at GH it’s the people. Their warmth and heart make the hospital extraordinary.

Laura asks Scotty how the envelope hunt is going. He can’t figure it out, and just wants to get it right for Gail’s sake. Laura asks if she can help him, and he says she smiles like she did when she was seventeen. He says if Gail hadn’t gotten him out of Greenwich Village, he would have never met her. They would never have had all that history. Laura finds his envelope, and he says it’s lucky they stayed friends. Laura says, very lucky. Scotty asks what she thinks is in the envelope, and she asks what he wants it to be. He says advice on how he’s going to continue on without Lee and Gail.

Franco sees Scotty, and says he’s sorry he didn’t let him know what was going on. He asked Scotty to defend the indefensible with no warning or explanation. Scotty says it was not his greatest day in court. Franco says to add insult to injury, he didn’t even reach out when Gail died. He never met her. He’s a terrible son; expecting the benefits of Scotty’s expertise, and the unending joy of his support. In response, he’s made no effort. Scotty says Franco just described him; how he treated his father. Gail to a lesser degree. He felt they’d always be there, and he didn’t have to put time in. He gets it now. It’s tough with the shoe being on the other foot. Now Franco has a kid going through some stuff, and he’s out of the loop. Kids should spend time with their parents. He gets it. Franco apologizes, and Scotty says he doesn’t hold it against Franco. He knows Franco is going through some crazy stuff; some legit, some not, but he’d never turn his back. Parents don’t do that. Lee would give him a stiff talking to. Franco says, and Gail? Scotty says, she was a little nicer, more accepting. He’s not like that, but Franco is his son, and he loves him. Because of him, he knows what his parents went through, and how much they loved him. He hugs Franco.

Julian tells Alexis that he didn’t know Gail. She says Franco didn’t either, but Julian says Franco is her grandson. Alexis says she had the privilege of being Gail’s lawyer for five years. She was a wonderful woman. Julian realizes she must have told Gail about them and she says she may have brought it up now and then. However misguided, she thinks Gail included him for her. She’s sure Gail’s intentions were good. She didn’t make clear it was over. Done, finé; forever and ever, amen. Julian backs her toward the wall, and she asks what he’s doing. He says he’s thinking maybe Gail was insightful. Maybe she knew Alexis better than she knows herself. He walks past her, and down the stairs.

Monica finds Lucy looking through her old Nurses’ Ball clothes. She asks what Lucy is doing, and Lucy says she was following the blueprint to where she had her old Nurses’ Ball dresses delivered. She has a fantastic idea. She wants to sell all of them, and donate the proceeds to the Ball. She finds a hankie with initials on it, and says, Alan could rock a pocket square. Monica says, he had panache. She asks if Lucy remembers when he opened the ball with a song from Cinderella. He made every woman feel like a beautiful princess. Lucy says Monica was always his queen. She was greedy, young, and stupid. She’s sorry. Monica says, don’t be. She’s not selling that, is she? Lucy shakes her head, and says it belongs to Monica. Lucy gives it to her, and I’m getting misty.

Sonny sees Laura in the chapel. He asks if she’s thinking about Gail. She says, yes, and life. She asks if he remembers the first time they met. He laughs, and says, yeah. She thought he was trouble with a capital T, but she could also sense a generous heart and an inner sweetness. Sonny asks if it might have been the dimples, and she says, a little, but she thinks it was just him. He’s a good guy in a bad guy’s clothes. He appreciates that. They’ve come pretty far despite the struggles and losses. Sonny appreciates her shining light on healthcare. She says he’s a big part of it. Watching him and his openness about his bi-polar illness. His honesty and experience gave her the strength to do the same. To show the world that mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of. It should be examined and dealt with, and it’s done every day there. Sonny says, thank God for General Hospital, and she says they’re in the perfect place to do that.

Max tells Maxie that he’s positive the vending machine used to be there. She agrees, saying he used to get peanut crackers that were probably there since the 1950s. She thanks him for being there for her after her heart operation. He could have refused to get the scar removed, but he says it was important to her. She says, now, she might do it different, but back then, she wanted to be normal, and not known as the heart transplant girl. Max says she’s way too spectacular to qualify as normal. He tells her that she’s wrong, and she says, be specific. He says if anyone told him that he’d find his greatest happiness in being a suburban dad, he’d have told them they were crazy. It took him a while to embrace it, but he’s never regretted it. He’s not judging, but the other guys don’t know what they’re missing. Felicia joins them.

Bobbie asks if Elizabeth is having any luck. Elizabeth says, no, and asks if this isn’t the old medical supply room? Where they had the metal cabinets with glass doors. Bobbie says those were long gone before Elizabeth became a nurse. Elizabeth says her mom isn’t the only reason she became nurse. It was also because of Bobbie. The night Lucky found her after she was raped, he called her. She was so gentle and kind. She knew what to say, and made her feel like she had control. Bobbie says she was so brave, and Elizabeth says she made an impact. Bobbie says she’s an excellent nurse, and she’s proud to have played a small part in that. They hug, and Bobbie finds Elizabeth’s envelope.

Sonny sees the plaque dedicated to Stone. He pauses in front of it, and smiles.

Curtis hopes Laura doesn’t mind, but a nurse saw her in the chapel, and he wanted to think her for not sidelining Jordan’s confidence in doing her job. Being commissioner means the world to her. Laura can see that, and her confidence is warranted. Her illness hasn’t slowed her down. She’s a strong woman, with a great support system, and a pretty good husband. He’s like, what? then laughs.

Carly sees Bobbie at the pediatric center dedicated to Michael, and tells Bobbie that she’s pregnant. She says they’re surprised and happy, and Bobbie is probably freaking out. Bobbie congratulates her, and asks what the doctor said. Carly says to be super careful about her stress and monitor her blood pressure. If the risk is above 50%, she may have to terminate. Sonny would say definitely. Bobbie asks what she says, and Carly tells her it will be her and Sonny’s second baby. Bobbie says it brings up Morgan, and Carly says she doesn’t want go there, but Bobbie says she can’t live her life in fear. Carly realizes that, but not knowing is a blessing. She’s grateful that she didn’t know the future for Morgan would be cut short, but it’s better than not having time at all. That’s how Bobbie feels about BJ. She tells Carly she has to be responsible, and Carly says, so far so good. Sonny joins them. Bobbie congratulates him, and says if there’s one thing she’s learned at the hospital, it’s that even if you can’t count on miracles, they do happen.

Bobbie asks how Scotty is holding up. He doesn’t know if he wants it to end. The Gail business is still keeping her alive. Bobbie says she’s alive in their minds and hearts. It’s a day for remembering. They’re still there after all this time; the redheaded nurse and the handsome boy next door. If she knew then what would happen, she wouldn’t change anything. Scotty says he would, but wouldn’t change that they’re still friends. They hug.

Doc tells Lucy that he’s completely lost. She looks at his blueprint, and he says she doesn’t have to do that. She says she’s helping a friend, and he says it’s better than he deserves. She says she’ll always stand by him. He says he doesn’t want to give her hope for something that’s not going to happen. He loves Laura, but wants her know that it wasn’t a mistake. Just because it doesn’t last, doesn’t mean it wasn’t meant to be. There’s a world full of beautiful things that don’t last. That makes it more special. She tells him that if he’s going to make her expensive mascara run, he’s going to be in trouble. She thinks she knows where he’s supposed to be, and takes his hand.

Leslie says Gail put them together on purpose, and Monica says, the reality is, there are more things that bind them than separate them. Leslie says even when she couldn’t stand Monica, she admired her. Monica feels the same, and says, it’s ironic. She thinks about all the yelling, crying, and hair pulling. Meanwhile they wound up with the men they were supposed to be with. Leslie says, too bad they didn’t think about that earlier. They could have saved the drama. Monica thinks Leslie likes drama, and Leslie says, maybe a little. Monica says they can look back, and smile.

Lucy leads Doc to the chapel, where Laura still is. Lucy sees his envelope, and gives it to him, saying, this is where he’s meant to be. She leaves, and Doc and Laura look at each other.

Doc asks how Laura is, and she says, okay. He misses her. She misses him too. He hates how he ruined this for them, but she says he didn’t; not completely. He says they’ll always have Paris, and she says she’ll always have his proposal, and how he tricked her into putting on that dress. It’s one of the best moments of her life, and it was with him. She’ll never forget it, no matter what happens. He says, no matter what happens, he’ll never forget she said yes. Leslie walks in, but says she’ll come back. Laura tells her, it’s okay. She tells Doc that she’s glad he’s safe. He leaves, and Leslie asks if she’s all right. Laura says, she will be, and they hug.

Lucy tells Scotty that she talked to Serena. She wanted to hear the end of Gail’s will reading, but the connection was horrible. Scotty says they should have had a love story like Lee and Gail. Lucy says they never seemed to get the timing right. They look out, and see Doc. Scotty says, it’s so complicated.

Laura asks how Leslie is doing with Gail’s death. She says, it feels different being with everyone. She thought it would be worse; too many memories, but it turned out to be the exact opposite. Laura says she was remembering when she was a candy striper. She was so proud that her mother was a doctor there. She was fortunate to have a role model like Leslie. Not that she followed her example. Leslie says Laura is her wonderful, compassionate, tempestuous daughter. She’ll always do things her way, but Leslie loves that about her, and couldn’t be any prouder. Laura thanks her, and they hug.

Epiphany asks Elizabeth how the envelope hunt is going, and Elizabeth says she found hers. Epiphany says, what a trip. Elizabeth says she was talking to Bobbie about her being an inspiration for her becoming a nurse, but Epiphany taught her how to be one. She leads by example every day. She advocates for the patients, doesn’t tolerate whining, and understands human flaws. Epiphany says she takes the most pride in teaching those eager to learn, who don’t think the know everything and criticize them. That’s Elizabeth. She’s receptive, works hard, and is always contributing. They’re a team. Elizabeth says she doesn’t always say it, but she couldn’t ask for a better colleague or friend.

Alexis asks for everyone’s attention. At Gail’s request, they’re to open their envelopes on the count of three. They open the envelopes, and inside is glitter. Franco throws his in the air, and puts his arm around Scotty.

Alexis reads a letter from Gail, asking them to forgive her last indulgence. As they’ve figured out, there’s nothing to find. She thanks Alexis for planting the envelopes, and says they’re probably wondering why they’re there. Why she orchestrated this wild goose chase. The answer is simple. She wanted to bring them back to a time they were together. She tells them to cheer each other on as they carry the work forward. They couldn’t ask for a better place or better friends. There are amazing times to come, and she asks them to cherish them, as she cherishes them.

We see flashbacks of everyone from the past, and all the moments they talked about. Yep, they did it now, and I was holding it together through the whole show. A song plays about wishing the clock could be slowed down because memories aren’t enough.

Everyone slowly goes back to work. Lucy hugs Scotty. Alexis leaves. We see…

Happy 56th Anniversary

and I feel a little old.

Tomorrow, Oscar wants to give Josslyn something more, Sonny asks if Michael has an exit plan, Jason tells Sam that Shiloh doesn’t go near Danny again, and Shiloh tells Kristina that once she’s in the Trust, there’s no turning back.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Denise and Aaron check out their wedding gifts. They’ve decided to postpone the honeymoon, since they both have too much going on. Denise can’t believe they put it together. We flash back to how late she was. In her interview, she says the difference between this wedding and her wedding to Charlie, is that her and Charlie’s wedding album was done the day she filed for divorce. At least they made it to opening the gifts. She tells Aaron, Lola said she was so happy. She feels like now they have a family. We see a clip of that. Aaron says he was nervous to get their approval. In Denise’s interview, she’s amazed at how well Aaron has done with the kids. He’s nurturing and present. She tells him, in one day he became a husband and stepfather. When he adopts Lola, he’ll be a dad too. Add water, and he has an instant family.

At Vanderpump Dogs, filming is happening. Giggy! TV producer Simon is there for the Puppy Bowl.  In LVP’s interview, she explains what the Puppy Bowl is, and that the rescue center was chosen to compete. Pup Violet is going to be playing, and it’s huge for them. Simon films LVP talking about the rescue center. She says they’re crazy about dogs, but wanted to create an environment that’s people friendly as well. She says the Puppy Bowl will be fun, but it will also help the dogs get adopted. That’s why Violet his helping out, and not Giggy. Giggy also had a problem with his heart (my heart!). We see a clip of the vet telling LVP that Giggy’s heart has aged faster than he has. LVP says he’s doing better. They’ve also gotten involved with getting a resolution to congress condemning the dog meat trade. It’s their first political step to stop it all over the world. it’s going to be streaming online tomorrow. In her interview, LVP thinks Teddi is a complete and utter bitch, but she’s done a couple of fundraisers, and every penny helps. There’s supposed to be one tomorrow, and LVP hopes Teddi goes ahead with it.

Teddi asks Edwin if he’s coming to the fundraiser. Normally, a spin class is twenty bucks, and the donate 60% of the proceeds. Edwin says, it’s a win-win for everyone. Teddi is uncomfortable, but she made the commitment. If LVP shows up, okay; and if not, okay. Before the dog situation, she’d partnered with Vanderpump Dogs, and it was so successful, they did two back to back. Just because they have issues doesn’t mean she’s not staying true to her commitment. She calls Dorit, and asks how it’s going. Dorit says, not good, and asks if Teddi saw the article in Radar Online. Teddi says someone sent it to her. Dorit thinks LVP is behind it, and doesn’t get it. She just saw her at the wedding. Teddi asks if LVP brought anything up at the wedding, but Dorit says, nothing. In Dorit’s interview, she says it’s hard to tell if everything is fine, but LVP’s actions are showing her it’s not fine. Teddi asks if LVP has called her, and Dorit says, no. Teddi says, it goes from one level to the next. Bringing her into it, bringing Kyle into it, and now bringing the press into it. We see a clip of Dorit telling PK that people’s perceptions are what they believe and read. If that’s true, people need to get off the internet. Teddi asks, when does it stop? She hasn’t heard from LVP regarding the fundraiser. The last time, John Blizzard came. Dorit says they’ll talk about it then.

At the CycleHouse fundraiser, Teddi wonders where LVP is. The biggest thing for charities is outreach, and she needs to show up. She’s surprised John Blizzard isn’t there, since she planned it with him. We see a clip of that. Lyndsey from Vanderpump Dogs shows up, and Teddi says, luckily, someone came, even if she doesn’t recognize them. She hasn’t heard from LVP. The other ladies trickle in, and everyone has snacks. Shouldn’t that be for after? LisaR caresses Erika’s handbag. She’s upset about the article, and asks if anyone knows who leaked it. Erika wonders, why humiliate Dorit? Teddi thinks it’s surprising that LVP isn’t there; it’s her own charity. LisaR says it’s hard to understand. Teddi says it’s a couple of minutes to go time.

At Vanderpump Dogs, LVP talks to Congressman Alcee Hastings, the Representative from Florida. He’s a huge animal rights supporter. He tells her the vote will be on at 5:40 tonight, and they’ll speak afterward. In LVP’s interview, she says the first the Congressman heard about the issue was through their endeavors. They called attention to it. We see a clip from LVP’s Dog Day. He contacted them, and said he hopes it passes if brought to the floor.

Kyle shows up last. LisaR wipes down her bike, saying it’s an OCD moment. There aren’t only germs, but sweaty germs. Kyle has no idea how to do this. The instructor says they’re doin’ it for the puppies. Class starts, and she screams at them. In Erika’s interview, she says, spin is aggressive. It keeps getting faster and harder, but she’s not letting these bitches see her suffer. In Denise’s interview, she says she does Pilates, but this is different, and the class is kicking her ass. At the end, the instructor says they made it, and gives a shout out to Teddi. Teddi thanks everyone. She’s grateful for her husband and friends supporting her. She says, regardless of the circumstances, real friends show up. I’m guessing she’s referring to LVP, but it’s not like they’re friends. Everyone has more snacks.

Teddi thanks the ladies, and tells them that they look great. They head out to Fig & Olive for lunch. Teddi says John was supposed to be there at 10 am, but at 10:10, on no one was there. Finally, they came at 10:30, but it was no one she’d met before. In her interview, she’s not surprised. If anyone confronted the employees, they’d have to lie. LVP lying is one thing, but forcing her staff to lie is another. Kyle says LVP had another event. She called last night and invited her to come afterwards. LisaR says she had something at the same time? and Kyle says it’s from 11 to 5, but she told LVP she’d committed to lunch. Denise wonders why LVP couldn’t come there first, but Kyle has no idea. Teddi says, Vanderpump Dogs is five minutes away. She could have shown up. LisaR says LVP is clever, and does a (bad) imitation of her saying she can’t possibly show up. She had another event.

Vanderpump Dogs isn’t getting a signal, and LVP says John (Blizzard) can’t do anything right. The TV says No Signal! like mine does when I use the wrong input; like it’s shouting at you. The other John (Sessa) fixes it. LVP tells JohnB to go pick up poops. They watch Congress do not much. Ken and Pandora arrive. The resolution urges all nations to outlaw the dog meat trade. LVP gets a special thanks. In her interview, LVP says, it’s a great gift and achievement. The vote happens, but no one is quite sure if it passed. JohnS calls their contact, and asks, what happened? He feels like an idiot, and so do I, since I didn’t understand it either. They find out it passed. LVP cries, and thanks everyone. Ken pops champagne, and it goes everywhere. LVP says, the US is on board to ban the dog meat trade. In LVP’s interview, she says it’s been them, shouting from the rooftops, walking the pavement. It’s an emotional moment, knowing it’s being acknowledged.

Dorit says she woke up to the Radar Online article about the dog situation. She knows LVP fed them the story. She asks if Kyle read it, and Kyle says she saw it everywhere. Dorit says, they’re not just her words; it’s the way she wants the world to perceive the situation. Kyle says she’s not there to defend herself, but LisaR says, she chose not to be there. Erika says, it’s indefensible behavior. In her interview, LisaR says Kyle struggles with doing the right thing and what LVP wants her to do. She thinks it’s a weird relationship. Kyle is very conflicted. Dorit says, even the verbiage she used; she knows LVP leaked it. In Erika’s interview, she says LVP most definitely manipulated the truth. Less than ten people knew about it. Now it’s out there. LisaR says LVP knows how to work it. In her interview, she says LVP told her how to plant a story. She told LisaR if she ever had trouble with the press and needed to leak her story, to call this person. She clearly knows how do it. Denise asks Kyle if she’s known LVP leak things before. Kyle says, everyone has done things like that, and like a prosecuting attorney, Dorit says, answer the question. Kyle says she has no proof or knowledge, since she doesn’t have a connection there. She doesn’t know. Dorit asks if she has in the past, and Kyle says, yes. In her interview, Kyle says she can’t say it’s never happened when LVP has been accused of it in the past. We flash back to an old reunion, when Adrienne Maloof accused her of leaking a story. Kyle wishes she could say it’s not true, but she can’t.

The waiter comes. Kyle asks if Dorit has talked to LVP since the article came out, and Dorit says why would she? She’ll just hear her lie and deny it. Kyle says, if she did it, it’s because she wants people to take her side. It’s basically between Dorit and LVP, and LVP doesn’t want to look bad. It’s her way of getting in front of it. Dorit says she’s not letting LVP peddle an untruth. Kyle says she’s going through a hard time. Teddi asks, when Kyle has a hard time, does she hurt people? Teddi thinks maybe Kyle can talk to LVP. In Kyle’s interview, she says she still cares and loves LVP as a friend, but she’s not there to speak up for herself.

JohnS says they’re crazy dog rescuers, but he loves it. JohnB asks LVP if he can text about it, and she says this is one time he can go rogue. LVP tells JohnS that she hates the negative talk around the center. Teddi is wrong, and they hammered her in the Bahamas. We flash back to that. JohnS wishes he could come for them, but she says what he did was good enough. It would have looked petty for them to cancel the fundraiser.

Denise knows it’s hard to believe, but she’s had bad press. She says the truth comes out over time; screw all this. At the end of the day, who gives a sh*t? In her interview, Denise says when there were negative things written about her, it was hard to have a thick skin, but the best defense is to say nothing. She gets that Dorit needs to protect her family though. Teddi says when it’s about an animal, the amount of people come at you and attack is beyond. Dorit says she lies awake, thinking someone will hurt her kids. She cries, and I think she can be Babydoll II. She says she’s scared. She’s getting messages. In her interview, Dorit says the article exposed her and her family in a vulnerable way. There have been comments that her children deserve to be bitten. Kyle says, it’s hard when you care about someone. Erika says, it’s disappointing.

Kyle visits her friend Sharon. She’s bringing a dress for Teddi to use in a photo shoot. Kyle points out that one of Sharon’s dogs is wearing a diaper, and Sharon says he will if he wants to live there. In Kyle’s interview, she says she met Sharon when she was dating Mauricio, and they both adopted dogs from the same litter, so it makes them related. Teddi arrives, and Kyle shows them jewelry she’s having duplicated. Some of the pieces are the ones her mom gave her that were burglarized. In her interview, she says she can’t replace what her mom left her. When she was growing up, her mom wore cocktail rings. Sharon is an incredibly talented in jewelry making, and she’s going to recreate the rings. Kyle says she was going over their conversation from yesterday. In Kyle’s interview, she says after the lunch, LVP went to TMZ, defending Dorit, but hasn’t said one word to Dorit. Teddi says LVP claims she fixed it up last night. Kyle wonders how you don’t have time to reach out to friend if you’re concerned, and not just for yourself. Kyle says she’s going to talk to LVP, saying she loves her, but this is the situation. She’s in a weird position. It feels weird being honest because cares about LVP.

Harry shows LisaR his food selections for camping. He just got back from mountain climbing in Canada, and he’s going back. He tells LisaR, you just add boiling water. She wonders why it works between them; they’re so opposite. She says how about Denise getting married in two days? She called on Wednesday, and the wedding was Saturday. She tells Harry that he and Aaron have Nicolette Sheridan in common. He says it’s enough to have in common, and asks what else? She says, there’s a situation with the women about a dog rescue. She explains about the two Johns, Kyle, Teddi, and Dorit, but Harry probably stopped listening when she said, situation with the women. She says it’s like a soap opera. Harry tells her, think of the drama as propaganda. It’s used to drive a wedge in to stabilize the group, so the person creating the drama can take over. In her interview, LisaR calls LVP, Lisa Vandertrump. Please. First of all, doesn’t Harry mean polarize the group? And yes, I know I think LVP can do no wrong, but in reality, Dorit screwed up, tried to get over, and Teddi is the one who made a big deal out of it. Even if she was being baited, she could have just dropped out and ignored the whole thing. I get why she might want to talk to Dorit, but there was no reason for her to involve everyone. It was only then when LVP started defending herself. Harry is testing out his tent. He says, mosquitoes can’t get in, but bears can. LisaR wonders, why do this? and he says he’s not in the bear’s food chain. They both get in the tent, She finds a dead mosquito, and says he couldn’t get her to do this. Maybe if she was medicated.

Kyle drives to LVP’s house. In her interview, she says she’s dreading it. In the past, she’s defended LVP, no matter what. We flash back to some of that. She says, this time it’s different. As difficult as it is, she has to be honest, and knows LVP will be upset. If she looks at how she’s raising her daughters, she’d tell them to defend what’s right. That’s what she’s doing, and it’s going to be absolute torture.

Kyle lets herself in, and congratulates LVP on the bill passing. LVP says she’s so excited. In Kyle’s interview, she says she’s been dreading this moment, but she has to have this conversation. It runs the risk of hurting their friendship, and she doesn’t want to do that. She tells LVP about lunch, and says the Radar Online thing came up, and Dorit was really upset. The article sounds like it comes from LVP’s camp. LVP only knows that she talked to TMZ when they came to the center. She put herself on the line. Kyle says LVP always told her to look for who benefits from a story, and it’s bad for Dorit. She said activists are coming after her. Kyle says she’s in a bad position as LVP’s friend. Ken (Giggy!) tells her to say it’s not true; it’s not. LVP says Kyle thinks she would leak a story, then give another one refuting the first one? Kyle tells her, that’s what everybody says. It seems like she’s trying to get ahead of it, so people believe her. They both talk at once, and Kyle says LVP isn’t letting her talk. She’s here as a friend. Ken says Kyle’s not LVP’s friend, and Kyle says she’ll defend what’s right. LVP asks if Kyle thinks she leaked the story about Dorit, and Kyle admits she does; it’s so blatant. LVP says this is a big shock. In her interview, LVP says when push comes to shove, Kyle doesn’t back her up. We flash back to some of that, and I think it’s more that Kyle doesn’t want to make waves. LVP thinks this is another case of that. LVP says she’s not saying she did something wrong when she didn’t. She’s a woman of integrity. Kyle says it doesn’t mean she wouldn’t love LVP. LVP swears on her children’s lives; on Giggy’s life. Well, she must be telling the truth then. Kyle says, maybe she cares more about her image than she does her friendships. LVP says she can show herself out. In Kyle’s interview, she says she want to say one more thing, and turn it around. She never imagined it would get like this. Ken shows her the TMZ interview on his tablet, and asks if that doesn’t sound genuine. She can’t be LVP’s friend when she says something like that. LVP would never say that about her. She’s an effing liar, and not LVP’s friend or his. He tells her, please go. Kyle says she’s here because she didn’t want to feel like this. Ken tells her, join the gang. They’re ganging up on LVP. Kyle says she cares about her, and LVP says they’re done. Ken says, a twelve year friendship, done. Kyle asks if she’s not allowed to be honest. She’s just telling them how it looked. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t love LVP. She didn’t come to fight. LVP tells Kyle that she came there to say she’s a liar. Kyle says she has a hard time defending LVP, when they all think the same thing. LVP says if Kyle claimed she didn’t say something, she’d believe her. In Kyle’s interview, she says LVP is in so deep with what she said, there’s no turning back. How can they ever repair this situation? LVP tells Kyle to get the eff out of her house, and tells Ken that she’s done with Kyle. One of the dogs runs to the door as it closes behind Kyle, and I want to cry.

Next time, the yoga where you hang from aerial silks, Kyle tells the others what happened, and Denise doesn’t want to get on LVP’s bad side.

If Loving You Is Wrong

Steven single-handed beats up all four guys, smashing the last one’s head into their car window. Esperanza runs out, asking, what’s going on? Steven says he knows Eddie is behind this. Esperanza tells him, call the station, but he says he doesn’t need backup. He says, go in the house, and limps off. She makes a phone call.

Natalie’s phone rings. Esperanza asks if Lushion is there; it’s an emergency. Natalie says she’s tired of them calling for her man, but gives Lushion the phone. Esperanza explains that Steven was at her house, and four guys came when he was leaving. They got in a fight. Lushion asks if the four guys are all right. Steven is a bad boy. She says, they ran. Steven thinks Eddie sent them, and she doesn’t like the way Steven left. She’s never seen him that angry. She thinks he went to the pub to find Eddie. Lushion says, then Eddie should hide. She begs him to go to the pub. She thinks someone will get hurt. He says then she and Steven shouldn’t go there. There are a lot of police there; he’ll be fine. She repeats she’s never seen him like this, and Lushion says the only thing she knows about Steven, is that he wears purple drawers. She’s asking a favor; can he go? He says he’ll talk to Natalie, and hangs up. Natalie says, just go.

Natalie asks why Lushion is taking his time. He says he just realized he has to give Steven time to whoop Eddie’s ass. He’ll be just fine. Natalie says she understands him. He says that’s why he loves her.

Eddie sips his beer. Duncan and the guys come in. Duncan says Eddie didn’t tell them that bastard knew karate. Eddie says all of them couldn’t handle that punk. One guy says he needed stitches, and another says Steven damn near broke leg. Eddie says that’s what he gets, asking a group of ladies to do a man’s job. He can’t believe they couldn’t handle it. Steven comes in. The guys back up, and he sits. He says, so Eddie did send them. Eddie says he recognizes one of them, and Steven says maybe he’d like to join the other guy in the hospital. The bartender says he just had a brawl, and Eddie says there won’t be another one. Steven says Eddie knows he’s getting an ass kicking, and if he thinks these guys are stepping in, he’ll kill them. Steven sucker punches Eddie, then beats on him. Everyone just watches as he pummels Eddie’s face.

Lushion walks in, and tells Steven, enough; stop. Eddie says, leave him alone, and Lushion suggests he let this go. Eddie says he’s not letting it go, and Lushion says they’ll put that on his tombstone. Here lies Eddie, who wouldn’t let it go. The bartender wonders who’s cleaning this up. Lushion suggests Eddie, and leave.

Ian looks though some files, and pulls one out. Larry sees him, and says he’s there late. Ian didn’t think Larry was still there, but Larry says he was tied up (ha-ha!), and had catching up to do. He asks if Ian has Travis’s file. He thought he told Ian to get rid of it. Ian wants to talk about it, but Larry says there’s nothing talk about; give him the file. Ian says after everything Travis has done to her, Larry wants to bury it? Larry says, give him the damn file, but Ian says they need to talk about it. Larry says the represent Travis’s parents and the church to the tune of millions of dollars. They have an obligation to the client. Ian says Larry’s client, not his. Larry says Ian works for the firm; so does he. It’s a clear conflict of interest. Most of the sh*t they do there isn’t right. Ian says, this isn’t right. Larry says they’re defense attorneys. Since when do they give a damn what’s right or wrong, or the law? Ian says, because of everything Travis has done to her. Larry asks if Ian is sleeping with her, and Ian says, of course not. Larry says maybe that explains why Ian needs to take the paperwork that exonerates her. He’ll turn Ian over to the bar. Ian laughs, saying he’s got so much on Larry. Larry is sure he does, but he doesn’t play bondage with nine members of the bar association, does he? Larry says he could fire Ian, and when he walks out, so does his career. Ian hands him the file. Larry says if Ian has any copies or anything memorized, he strongly recommends Ian get rid of it , or he’ll eat his ass for breakfast. Ian tells Larry that he’s a weird dude.

Kelly calls for the nurse. The nurse asks if she can’t sleep, and Kelly asks her to loosen the cuffs. The nurse says she’s a prisoner. She killed that man, and needs to suck it up. She knows where she’s going. A woman being examined tells Kelly, stop asking. Kelly says she’s not talking to her, and calls for the nurse again. The woman says they don’t care. Kelly thinks she’s one of them; better than her. Kelly tells her, mind her own business. The woman says, or what? Kelly will kill her. They try to take the options out of the prisoners’ hands. A staff member comes in, and says take the woman back to her cell.  She introduces herself as Margaret; she’s the chaplain there. She asks if Kelly wants prayer, and Kelly says, no. Margaret says they all forgive her. Kelly asks who they are, and Margaret says, Calvary Church. Travis was a good man. Kelly calls for the nurse. Margaret says she’s not there to harm Kelly, but pray for her. Kelly says she should have prayed for him. Margaret says they prayed for his soul. Kelly asks, why doesn’t she pray that God reveals the truth? Margaret says she already knows Kelly stalked Travis until she killed him. Kelly says that’s what Travis did to her. Margaret says she’s not the first woman to say that. They all get jealous. His father is prominent and powerful Kelly asks, how many women said that? and Margaret says she did. Kelly tells her that she just said there were others. Margaret says they were talking about truth. Kelly quotes the Bible, saying, some trust in chariots, and some in horses, but she trusts in the name of the Lord, her God (Psalm 20:7). Margaret says she knows that one, and they throw Bible verses at each other. Margaret says, thou shalt not kill. Kelly says she calls herself a woman of God. Please asks God to reveal the truth. Please. Surprisingly, Margaret says, okay; she will. Kelly says, good. Now leave. They trade God bless yous, and Kelly calls the nurse. She says she’s having chest pains. The nurse says, all right, and goes back to her station.

Alex’s phone dings. Dr. Raston texts that she’s been trying to call her. Alex knows. Dr. Raston texts, they’ve known each other a long time. Alex is sorry. Dr. Raston texts what she did was horrible and unethical. What Alex said to Brad that she switched the tests. Alex needs to fix this. Alex texts she told him the truth, but the doctor texts, it’s not just that. She thinks there’s going to be a Board Review about how she handled it. Alex needs to let the Board know that she lied. Alex texts, she will, and Dr. Raston texts, she’ll get that scheduled. Alex asks, how could this happen? The DNA not matching? The doctor texts, it’s either a very rare mistake or Alex has another partner. Alex texts, there was no other partner.  Then it’s a mix up in the lab. She asks if there’s any way Brad could be the father. Dr. Raston doesn’t know. Alex tests, the baby is clearly mixed. What about the family tree? If there’s someone who’s darker? The doctor texts that she had a patient with a redheaded baby. The father doubted it, since here was no one in the family who was redheaded. Alex asks, what happened? Dr. Raston texts, the DNA showed he was the father. Sure enough, there was a grandparent who had red hair. Alex texts, so it could be possible? The doctor texts, it’s beyond a stretch, but it could be possible. There are medical cases, but she doubts it. They’ll talk about it when Alex talks to the Board. In the meantime, she’ll do some research. Alex texts, OK. Thanks.

A doctor tells Eddie, nothing is broken, but he’s going to be sore as hell. Eddie says he doesn’t need a doctor to tell him that. The doctor says he’s fortunate there’s no internal bleeding. Eddie says just give him the damn pain pills. The doctor writes a prescription, and Eddie looks at it. He says he’s a cocaine addict, and the doctor says he shouldn’t take it then. Eddie tears up the prescription, and throws it at the doctor, saying he needs something stronger. The doctor says he can report Eddie. Eddie says he can report the doctor. When he did Eddie’s prostate exam, he left his finger up there for some time. The doctor says he never gave Eddie an exam. He calls Eddie one unethical horrible person, but gives him a new prescription. Eddie suggests the doctor give him two or three of those. Just sign them; he’ll fill them out himself. The doctor signs a few, and Eddie grabs them, along with the doctor’s pen.

Eddie sees Kelly in the waiting area, and asks what she’s doing there. She tells him, get away, and a nurse asks, what’s going on? Eddie asks if she can’t tell him how she’s doing, and she says leave her alone. He sits down instead, saying she looks like hell. She says, so does he. He says she bought a house for a man, and killed two. They’re calling her the Black Widow. He touches her arm, and says, Black. He says she’s chained up like a farm animal; like a big ass mule ridden into the ground. She tells him, go away. He says he’d never say anything racist, and she calls for the nurse. He says, scream louder. He says, she’s so selfish. Hanging herself, and not thinking about anyone else. Suddenly, Rick is there, and asks what Eddie is doing. Eddie says, having a conversation with a friend. Rick tells him, get out now. Eddie says he doesn’t take orders from him, and Rick says, bounce. Eddie says he’ll let him have her, and tells Kelly that he’ll see her soon.

Rick asks if Kelly is all right. She says she can’t stand Eddie. She says she told the nurse she had chest pains, like Rick told her too, but she’s being ignored. Rick says the nurse is just mad because she has to do paperwork. He said he’d do it. Kelly asks if he’s been drinking. He says hours ago; he’s good. He’s going to be her guard while she’s there. She can’t believe they have her there; everyone is just passing her by. Rick says, it’s fine, and she says, easy for him to say. He’s not chained up. She asks if he can stay with her, and he says he wants to. He says he used to work security for the church, and she says he’s on Travis’s side too, but he says he’s not. Some things went down, and he thinks he can help her. She asks why she should trust him, and he says, what else does she have to lose? She asks if he knows Margaret, the chaplain. Margaret visited her, and said she’d been praying for her. He says Margaret means well, but Kelly doesn’t think she’s a great person. Margaret wouldn’t believe her, and said a lot of stuff against her. She also said there were others. She acted like she didn’t, but Kelly knows what she heard. Rick promises he’s going to watch everything. The doctor comes to take Kelly for tests. He wheels her away, and Rick follows.

Natalie’s phone rings. It’s Esperanza, who asks if Lushion is home. Natalie says, no, and asks what Esperanza is doing. Esperanza says she just likes Steven, and doesn’t want to see him get hurt. Natalie says Esperanza knows Eddie is going to act the fool every chance he gets. She needs to shut this down, once and for all. Esperanza says she’s tried everything; nothing works. That’s who he is. Natalie says, all this mess with Kelly; she needs to get this under control. She suggests Esperanza try talk to him. Esperanza says she’s tried that, thousands of times. Natalie means sitting him down to have a nice long talk. Esperanza asks if she thinks it will work, and Natalie says, hell no. Esperanza says, why do that again? and Natalie asks what else she’s got. Talk to him. Try to reason with him. Esperanza says she’s hearing Natalie, but can’t believe she, of all people, is saying talk. Natalie says she’s just giving Esperanza options. Just try it. Lushion comes in, and Natalie gives him the phone. He tells Esperanza, Steven is fine. Eddie is beat up pretty bad. She thanks him, and she says he needs to talk to her tomorrow about her, Steven, and this. They say goodnight.

Eddie sits in his car, when his phone rings. He asks to what does he owe this surprise? and Esperanza says she just wants to talk to him. He says he’s on his way, but she says, not tonight. He knows she wants some of this, and she tells him, stop. He says he’s sore as hell, but can work it out for her. She doesn’t know why she bothers with him. He says, what can I do for you, my dear? and she tells him, stop being an a-hole. He says, that’s like telling Lushion not be Black. She heard he got his ass kicked. She wants to sit down, have a nice lunch, and talk like civilized people. He asks what she wants to talk about, and she says, there are a lot of things they need to talk about. He says, she misses him, doesn’t she? She asks will he just have lunch with her? He says he’ll bring lunch to the house, and they can have a picnic on the bed. She hangs up, and shakes her head. He says, playing hard to get, and she says, it’s never going to work.

There’s a knock at Esperanza’s door. She swears if Eddie’s been sitting out there the entire time… It’s Steven, and she asks if he’s okay. He says he’s fine, and she tells him that she’s sorry she got him involved. He says, don’t apologize. He can handle it. She asks if he wants to come in, but he just wanted to say, sorry. He’s pretty scary, and can be monster when pushed. She says, Eddie was like that, but he says he’s nothing like Eddie. She asks if he thinks she’d like him if he was. Eddie became that. Steven says, he’s an addict. Eddie does more blow than the people they arrest. She didn’t know that. She didn’t think it was that bad. He says, it’s really bad, and she asks him not to hold it against her. He says he’s not upset with her. She says she’s been there before. Eddie has ruined so many potential relationships. He asks if she’s saying they’re together, but she says, no. He says, whatever she’s saying, she’s not losing him. it was a long, crazy night, and he wants to sleep, and give this some thought. She says she’s there if he needs her. He says, the monster she saw earlier? He’d never lay a hand on anyone she cares about.

Natalie tells Lushion that his phone was ringing. She’d put it on vibrate, so it didn’t wake the kids. He says it was Rick, and calls back. Rick says, Kelly is in the hospital. He’d told her to tell the infirmary she had chest pains, so she could be moved where she can get real help. She can talk to a psychologist while she’s there. Lushion says, that’s good. Rick just wanted him to know. Lushion tells Natalie what happened. She asks why he thinks Rick did that, and Lushion thinks he feels guilty about not helping her. She should cut him some slack; he was just doing his job. Lushion does think it’s a little strange for Rick to go that far. Natalie asks why he thinks that is. He doesn’t know, but he’s going to find out. She tells him, get some rest. She knows has to be tired. He asks what she’s doing, and she says, making the kids’ lunches for school. Lushion says he looked in on them, and they were sleeping. She asks how Justice was sleeping, and Lushion says, fine. She says, poor child, and Lushion says, he’ll be fine. She’s done a lot; all she can do. She say she’s hurting for them. She hopes Kelly gets off. Lushion does too. She says, that lawyer. How long has Lushion known him? Lushion says, long enough for him to be on his side. Natalie says she was wrong. If they need to spend the money to help Kelly, just do it. He says he’s working on something, and she says she can’t be that selfish. He knows where she’s coming from. She says, it’s a lot, but Kelly is their friend. He says they’ll do what they can do. She says she loves him; he’s a good man. He tells her, show him how much she loves him, when they hear a scream.

They look outside, and Tanya is on the sidewalk, screaming her head off.

Next time, Tanya freaks out, Lushion says it looks like they have some new neighbors, Brad tells Alex to sign the papers, Kelly begs Lushion not to cuff her, and Randal punches Larry out.

🏬 If anyone is still interested, The Real Housewives of Potomac is back on Sunday, May 5th, at 9 pm.

👠 Nobody Puts LVP In a Corner…

Please. Dorit should have thought twice about trying to get over. LVP and I stand by our stories.

🐶 Better Than Puppygate…

The Puppy Bowl.

👑 Presenting Prince Charming aka Alan Quartermaine…

And, oh yeah, the girl in the title role of Cinderella is Lesley Ann Warren.