What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
The doorbell rings at Anna and Finn’s place. Finn opens the door to find Chase with non-alcoholic champagne. Chase asks how it went, and says, here’s to the future Doctor and Mrs. Hamilton. Finn closes the door, leaving Chase outside. Chase says, Finn?
Elizabeth gets a text from Franco. She calls him and gets voicemail. She says she knows he’s upset, but they need to work through this as a family. Where is he?
Getting out of the elevator at Nina’s office. He walks in, and asks if she remembers how great it was to be self-centered all the time. Weren’t those the days? She asks what brings him by, and he says they need to talk about their step-kids.
Michael is glad Willow broke away. She did everything to protect her baby and lost it. Willow says he has it wrong, and it’s her fault. She’s been lying to him. Her baby didn’t die. He says they met in grief counseling, and she says she was grieving, just not the same way. She wasn’t there because her baby died. She was there because she gave him up for adoption.
Sonny looks through Shiloh’s book at the MetroCourt. Margaux comes in, and says he’s drinking coffee there like a law abiding citizen. He says it’s his coffee, and his wife’s restaurant. He thought they had an understanding, and Margaux agrees, but says it won’t stop her from prosecuting him. She tells him not to think he won’t slip up. He asks if she thinks he has something to hide, and she says, we all have something.
Brad sure does. He looks up classes on the DOD website, and registers for a seminar. Jason walks up, and says he has a question about the cup. Brad says, there were no traces of anything toxic. Jason says, only tea and Valerian root. Brad says some people call it nature’s Valium because it reduces anxiety. Jason sees the computer screen, and asks if Brad is a member of DOD.
Shiloh comes back to the DOD house, and Sam asks if he found Kristina. He says he checked GH and Mercy, but she’s not there. He thinks he knows what happened. He thinks she was kidnapped by Jason. Sam laughs, and he asks if she doesn’t think he’s capable of it. She says, of course (🍷), but she doesn’t think that’s what happened. She thinks Kristina got cold feet, and is embarrassed to come back. Shiloh says he has proof. She says, how? and he says he has evidence that suggests Jason broke in and grabbed her while they were at The Floating Rib.
Nina asks if Franco and Elizabeth didn’t get married. He says, it was a jailhouse wedding, and she says, romance is different for everyone. She wonders why he wants to talk about their kids, and he says, their step-kids, Charlotte and Aiden. The situation has gotten worse, and the awfulness is more widespread. Nina says, that’s not Charlotte’s fault, but he says, it became her fault when she decided to bully Aiden.
Finn opens the door again, and says Chase is still there. Chase says he’s a detective, and understands the subtleties of human behavior. The door slam was a cry for help. Finn tells him to keep a cork in it; the celebration is on ice. Chase asks if Anna turned him down, but Finn says he didn’t get the chance to ask her. The timing wasn’t right. Chase asks, what’s wrong? Finn doesn’t answer, and Chase says if they’re brothers, they need to be brothers. Finn is supposed to tell him stuff. Finn says he was going to be the guy who gets down on one knee in a crowded restaurant and makes a fool of himself, but Anna’s attention was divided. Chase asks, what by? and Finn says, her strange son. She was focused on him, then her ex showed up. Chase says, again? Finn tells him, Robert’s not the problem, and he might help Anna find the truth. Chase says, about? and Finn says, something in her past. Chase can’t imagine how complicated her past must be. Finn asks, how you can convince someone the past doesn’t matter and doesn’t define them? but Chase says he’s talking to the wrong man.
Willow says she let Michael think they’d both lost a child. Michael says they did both lose a child. She says she shouldn’t have been there. Michael says, maybe it’s selfish on his part, but he’s glad she chose to go to the group. If she hadn’t, they might not know each other. She says he doesn’t regret it by now? but he says, no; not now or ever. He’s glad her child is alive. He can’t imagine knowing her child is out there or how he is or where he is. She says, that’s just it; he’s still here in Port Charles. He asks if she knows the adoptive family. Do they let her see him? She says, in some ways, it’s a relief to be open about it. Other than Chase, Michael is the only person she can talk to. Her son is being raised by people who love him, which brings a measure of peace. Michael says, but she regrets having to give him up. She says she wouldn’t had it been an open adoption, but she gave up all parental rights to make sure… Michael finishes, that Shiloh never found out. She says, now that Shiloh has found her… He says, she needs to make sure he never knows she had his son.
Sonny tells Margaux, while she’s waiting for him to make a fatal mistake, try correcting her own – accepting that Ryan Chamberlain is dead. She says he went over the Falls lost and lost his hand. Sonny says, and last time, he burned death. He suggests she reopen the case. She says it’s out of her jurisdiction. Sonny asks if she’s looked his victims in the eye, and told them it’s not her problem. They deserve justice. She asks if he’s seriously talking to her about justice, and says, revenge is sweet, but it’s gone in a moment, and leaves you hungry, hard, and bitter. He asks if she’s out for revenge. She says she has been at times, but passion gives her a purpose. Sonny sees her glance at the book.
Brad tells Jason that he’s taken a seminar or two to destress from parenting. Jason asks how that’s working out, and Brad says he’s not twitching anymore, so there must be something to it. Lucas joins them, and tells Brad that they’ll have to play it by ear with DOD tonight. He thought he’d be free, but might have to fill in. Brad starts to leave, but Jason holds out his hand, and says, the cup. Brad hands it over, and leaves. Lucas asks if there’s a problem, and Jason says Brad was just doing him a favor. He asks if Lucas is really into DOD. Lucas says it’s way too new age for him, but Brad has taken some classes, and read the book twice. It seems to help him. Maybe Jason should look into it. Jason says maybe he will.
Sam tells Shiloh, it’s her fault. If she hadn’t been such a mess last night, he’d have been there. He says, the only one responsible for Jason’s actions is Jason. Ever since Sam joined, Jason has been consumed with hate for him and everything he stands for. Sam says it’s convinced her this is where she’s supposed to be. He’s glad for that, but it doesn’t help them find Kristina.
Elizabeth passes Lucas in the hall, and he asks if she’s okay. She says, fine; she just has a lot on her mind. Lucas asks if she wants to talk. She insists she’s fine, but he’s not buying it. How is she really? Elizabeth says she’s not great, and he asks how parenting is going. She says she’s making a mess of it. He jokes he’s been at it a whole nine months, so he’s an expert. He asks how Aiden is doing.
Nina tells Franco that her beautiful, brilliant stepdaughter, who speaks impeccable French, can tell a Manet from a Monet, and watch four hours of Figaro, is not a bully. He says, she made a kid who already feels small, feel tiny. Call it what she wants. She knows Charlotte said unkind things, but she was reprimanded by the school, her teachers, and her parents, including her. She apologized for being unkind, and the behavior has stopped. He says, except it hasn’t.
Sonny tells Margaux that he has a simple philosophy. He takes care of his own even when the authorities drop the ball. She says when you take action outside the law, you’re not a protector, but a criminal. Jason comes out of the elevator, and asks if there’s a problem. Margaux says they were just having a discussion. She tells Jason, when he attacked Shiloh, he acted like a man whose attorney would get him off. Jason says Diane is excellent, but Margaux says it wasn’t Diane who got him off; it was Shiloh. She hopes he learned from Shiloh’s act of kindness, but somehow doubts it.
Shiloh tells Sam that he forgave Jason, but Jason is a dangerous man. Sam asks if he has proof. They can call the cops. Shiloh says it won’t stand up in court, but luckily they have the one thing Jason has ever cared about – her.
Finn thought Willow was dealing with her ex, and Chase says, things between them have never been better. They went skating, he fell a lot, and they had a good laugh. The problem with her ex is like with Anna’s past; he won’t go away. Her ex has a hold on her. Finn asks if she’s having trouble getting over him, but Chase says, it’s the other way around. Her ex isn’t letting go.
Willow tells Michael that Shiloh can’t find out about the baby, but his sister needs help. She’ll be happy to talk to Kristina about her experiences in DOD. Michael says Willow warned him about the Trust, and they were able to get her out before they finished. Willow says, before it even happens, Shiloh gets leverage in place. Michael asks, what kind? and she says he convinces the member to make an offer he calls a pledge. Michael says he’s heard the term, but what does it mean? She says, what it means is that the member willingly gives Shiloh a sword to hold over their head forever.
Margaux tells Jason that she’d love to give him some friendly advice. He was lucky last time. If he targets Shiloh again, his luck will run out. Sonny says they’re too busy running a business to pay attention to self-help gurus. She hopes so. She sits at one of the tables.
Jason asks Sonny if he thinks Margaux knows about kidnapping Kristina. Sonny says it’s possible Shiloh told her something. Jason asks if he’s reading Shiloh’s book again, and Sonny says Neil told them it’s important to understand where Kristina is coming from for the exit therapy. Jason asks how that’s going, and Sonny says he discovered something interesting. Before Jason got there, Margaux said something; revenge is sweet, but gone in a moment and leaves you hungry. He taps the book, and says, she was quoting Shiloh. Margaux is a true believer, which makes her dangerous. He and Margaux look at each other.
Sam tells Shiloh she doesn’t understand. How can she prove Jason kidnapped her sister? He says it’s not about proving something or accusing. It’s about the people who claim to love Kristina. Who does she think sent Jason? She asks if he thinks Jason is taking orders from someone. Shiloh asks if Jason has ever done anything Sonny didn’t know about or approve.
Elizabeth tells Lucas that Aiden was the only one out of his entire class not invited to the party. It hurts to be excluded. He says, especially at that age. She adds that Bianca was Aiden’s best friend. She wanted him there, but her parents excluded him. He says, for the same reason Elizabeth wanted Aiden to know two guys skating together was okay. She says it spread to the other kids, and one of them called Aiden a fairy boy. Cameron got in a fight with the kid, and got suspended. Lucas says, good for him, standing up for his brother. Elizabeth says, yeah, except he was angry because they were calling Aiden gay when it wasn’t true, and asked if Aiden could be less gay. Franco freaked out, and said Cameron didn’t want to take the flack because his brother was different. She wasn’t easy on him either, but when she thought about it, Cameron is just a kid. Even though he was wrong, he was just saying it to protect Aiden from bullying. He wasn’t malicious, and she gave him zero credit.
Franco tells Nina, what Charlotte did was awful, but it’s spiraled out of control. The kids are making fun of Aiden for being different. Nina says, he’s just awkward, but Franco says, they’re calling him fairy boy. Nina asks if the school isn’t doing anything. Aren’t the kids supposed to be woke? He says it trickles down from the parents. It can and does still happen. Nina says the school year is almost over. Can’t he ride it out? Franco asks if she’s kidding him. She wants Aiden to ride it out? She says she’s sorry; that’s not what she meant to say. It was stupid. She’s stupid. Franco says she’s not stupid. Now that they agree, will she help out? Nina asks what he wants her to do, and he says, get Charlotte to be Aiden’s friend.
Willow tells Michael, before they join the Trust, you give proof of your loyalty. Michael says, not financial, and Willow says, it’s a different kind of gift. You give Shiloh a secret. Something, that should it come to light, would destroy you or someone you love. The candidate writes or records it, and Shiloh transcribes it. This means Kristina has already given the pledge. Shiloh can make your secrets public. Michael asks, did she? and she says, to her eternal regret. He asks why Shiloh hasn’t used it, and she thinks he still believes he can make her go back. When knows for sure… Michael says Shiloh is guilty of fraud and extortion. Willow hopes he can be arrested. Michael says, in the meantime, she can’t risk antagonizing him. He tells her, stay out of it, but she says she can still talk to his sister. Michael tells her, hypothetically, if they took Kristina, and holding her somewhere, it might be considered kidnapping. There’s no way he’s letting her get involved in that.
Jason tells Sonny that he had the cup tested. According to Brad, it was just tea and Valerian root. Sonny says they know she was drugged. Why would Brad lie? Jason says, Brad is a new convert. Sonny says, son of a bitch. Jason guesses Shiloh knows something’s up with them and Kristina. He thinks Brad got rid of the evidence, but he has it, and there’s still residue. Sonny says he needs someone he can trust. He’s calling Brick.
Sam tells Shiloh, there’s nothing Sonny could ask that Jason wouldn’t do. Shiloh says if Sonny asked him to take Kristina and hold her somewhere, would she know where that would be? Sam says Jason knows she’s there. He’s secretive and suspicious, and that means Sonny is too. If they know anything, they’re not telling her. Shiloh says, that means Kristina could be anywhere. Sam is afraid so. Shiloh says, that’s not a problem. Not for her.
Chase tells Finn, the hell with waiting. Let’s crack this baby open. Things are going well with him and Willow, but he won’t propose as long as this thing from the past is hanging over her. Finn says, instead of celebrating, they’re comparing relationships. Chase suggests they toast to something else. The two of them. They’ve gone from strangers to being brothers. Chase says, to brotherhood, and they clink glasses, Chase says since they worked out, maybe there’s hope for Finn and their dad.
Lucas tells Elizabeth, it sounds like they’re doing everything right. She says the boys are so unhappy. He says Franco is an artist, so he knows how to deal with Aiden. He knows he’s not alone if they make it their mission to let him know that it’s not just okay, but preferable to be different. She says, what about Cameron, and Lucas says he can’t be beating up every bigot. It doesn’t help. The best way to change minds is to teach with compassion. Make it look cool. She says he helped, and he says she can make it up to him by having them over for dinner. She says he’s on.
Nina tells Franco, there’s nothing she would like more than Charlotte being Aiden’s friend, but she can’t choose Charlotte’s friends. She has to be on board. Franco says Charlotte is a trendsetter. Doesn’t she if Charlotte shows the kids that they’re friends, the rest will come around? Nina says, they probably will. She’ll definitely try to do this. He thanks her, and she says all they can do is try. He leaves.
Willow appreciates Michael not wanting to involve her in what’s essentially a kidnapping. He says he hasn’t confirmed that’s what it was, so she’s still in the clear. Even though he’s not saying that’s what it is, it would be Kristina’s third time. She was kidnapped by a gangster, Joe Skully, when they were kids, and Michael’s biological father kidnapped him, Morgan, and Kristina. Willow says, so kidnapping is normal in his family? He says, except this alleged abduction is for her own good. She says, whoever loves Kristina the most, has the most to lose. It could be any one of them. Shiloh has a bomb, and she has to find a way do this. She’s been passive too long. Michael says she was just protecting her child, and she says, meanwhile, Shiloh claims another victim. It has to stop. Anything she can do to help, she wants to do it.
Sam tells Shiloh that he doesn’t understand. When Jason and Sonny hide someone, they stay hidden. Shiloh says she has a unique skill set that no one else there has. She can make Jason reveal things that he never would to anyone else. She asks if Shiloh wants her to work a con so he can figure out where Jason hid Kristina.
Franco sees Elizabeth at the hospital. He asks where Cameron is, and she says, community service. He tells her that he reached out to a friend, a fellow parent who can help. She says she did the same. Maybe with their friends’ help, they can make it better for the boys, She takes Franco’s hand, and presses the elevator button.
Nina calls Charlotte. She knows Charlotte is super busy, but asks if Charlotte can clear her schedule for her. She’d like to set up a playdate for her and a friend.
Brad asks Lucas is he still has to cover. Lucas says he’s free, but if it’s all the same, he was wondering if they could skip DOD. Brad says, but he’s free, and Lucas says he was thinking maybe they could have a nice evening with their son, and see what they can learn from that. Brad says, all right. Lucas talked him into it.
Shiloh tells Sam that he’d never ask her to use the methods she’s employed in the past. He’s not judging. What happened with his father is in the past. She’s finding rediscovery and reinvention. It’s all about this woman here now. It’s all about the truth, and he’s just asking her to be his truth seeker. It’s the only way to save Kristina from the people who want to cause her heartache, and bring her back to those who love her for who she is and can be. If anyone can find her, it’s Sam. Help bring her back to them.
Finn tells Chase that he’s glad they’re like this, but it’s a different relationship with their dad. He hopes Chase respects that. Chase gets it, but he can’t blame a guy for trying. Finn says, if Willow is hell bent on a lost cause, shouldn’t Chase practice, so he doesn’t embarrass himself again at the roller rink? Chase thinks she digs guys with a shaky sense of balance. He’s golden. Finn asks what he’s doing there. Chase says he can take a hint, and tells Finn, save some bubbles for Anna. About her past, keep it there; he’s her present, and she’s his future. Just give her the damn ring. Outside, he calls Willow.
Outside Charlie’s, Willow is glad he called. He asks if she wants to get dinner tonight. His place, her place, any place. She has to take a raincheck. A friend has a problem, and she promised to help out. He hopes it works out. She says, her too, and she’s holding him to the raincheck. He says, deal. Someone watches Willow from Charlie’s.
Michael meets Jason and Sonny at the MetroCourt. He ask how Kristina is, and Sonny says the doctor wants them to do a family intervention. Michael says before that happens, he found out Shiloh has an insurance policy, in case members try to leave. Sonny asks, what kind? Michael tells him, they share a secret. Highly sensitive information, as proof of their commitment, but it’s really… Jason says, leverage. Sonny says, Shiloh has something on Kristina, and Michael says, or someone she loves. Someone like him.
Tomorrow, Oscar needs a favor, Shiloh isn’t letting Sam do this alone, and Sonny says Shiloh might have leverage over him.
The Real Housewives of New York City
We backtrack a little, with Sonja gesturing wildly, and saying, you don’t touch the effing Morgan letters. Bethenny asks what just happened. Sonja begins to sob, and Ramona says they didn’t mean to upset her. Sonja says it was awful, and goes into repetitive mode. In her interview, Tinsley suggests an exorcism. Bethenny tries to calm her down, but Sonja says Bethenny wasn’t there. Bethenny takes Sonja aside, and tells her, everything is not a ten. In Ramona’s interview, she thinks going to the house stirred up memories. She’s not surprised at how Sonja is acting. I would suppose being drunk doesn’t help. We flash back to Ramona telling Dorinda that Sonja is going into a hole. Bethenny tells Sonja to pick her battles, while at the table, Ramona, in a flash of genius says, it’s emotional. LuAnn and Dorinda return from outside, and ask how Sonja is doing. Ramona says she had a breakdown, and Bethenny took her from the table. Bethenny says, it’s the wine talking, and Sonja says she has to protect herself, and not lose her sh*t. Bethenny says, that ship already sailed. In a surprise move, Ramona makes sense, and says she doesn’t think they were the original letters. Dorinda says, they’re not. Ramona goes out to tell Sonja the letters weren’t real. Bethenny says they’re not talking about it again. They all go back to the table, and LuAnn asks if it’s over. Sonja says she took the pressure off herself, and is going to have fun. She immediately starts harassing Barbara about going to Bethenny’s room. Bethenny tells her to drink some water. In Bethenny’s interview, she says the best way to handle Sonja is with a muzzle.
Ramona changes into a black teddy. In her interview, Dorinda is puzzled, since there are no men showing up, and the Naked Chef plays for the other team. Ramona flashes her thong. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, everything is a chaotic mess. Sonja loses her sh*t, and Ramona shows up in a negligee. Welcome to the Berkshires. Sonja asks where Coco is, and Ramona says with a helper in the kitchen. In Bethenny’s interview, she says she’s coming back as Ramona. She wants to evolve to the place where she shows up in a silk handkerchief and heels for dinner. What does her after dinner outfit look like? Bethenny says she usually heads upstairs after dinner, but she’s feeling the group, and could use a laugh. She needs dancing and laughing. We see clips of them acting insane. In her interview, LuAnn says, the Berkshires looks a lot crazier when you don’t drink. Barbara says she’s going to bed; she’s scared. Bethenny says, they needed to let loose. With this group, she could tell someone to go screw themselves, and be dancing with them ten minutes later. We’re a group of tough skinned bitches.
In her interview, Sonja says she’s heard rumors about Barbara, and thinks Bethenny is naïve when it comes to these women. Sonja is coming from a place of love admiration; she doesn’t want to get in Bethenny’s pants. In Barbara’s interview, she says, watching the sunrise, she knew her bags were never unpacked, and she was zipping that bitch up, and getting out of there. She tells Dorinda that her house is gorgeous, and she had fun. LuAnn leaves with her. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she accomplished what she needed to do; reestablish a connection with LuAnn, and keep Barbara out of it.
Dorinda and Bethenny go for a walk. Bethenny says Dorinda is going to freak out when she shows her something. When she was in Boston, there was a pad by the hotel phone, and this was on it. She hands Dorinda a paper. Dorinda says she doesn’t get it. She reads, wow, you look spectacular. You’re amazing as always. D. Dorinda asks if Dennis wrote like this, and Bethenny tells her, he always said spectacular. Dorinda says, it’s weird. In Bethenny’s interview, she says Dorinda has experienced death, and is open to alternative approaches. Bethenny thinks he’s trying to send her a message. In her interview, Dorinda says there are signs all over the place. Part of it is, we’re looking for them, but they’re undeniably real. She tells Bethenny that she can make Dennis happy by moving forward.
Back in NYC, Bethenny talks to housekeeper Lanie about having movie night with Brynn and the dogs. Brynn is only into PB&J right now, and Bethenny gets out supplies. Lanie asks if Brynn is having a playdate, but Bethenny says it’s going to be mommy and me. They’re doing art day today, and making cupcakes. She wants to look at the cards she saved from Dennis’s flowers. In her interview, she says she’s seeing someone in Boston. She’s moving forward, but of all the people to lose, Dennis was ever present. She can’t get him t of her head. She looks through old greeting cards, and gets weepy. Lanie misses him too. They look at photos. Bethenny points out one of Dennis and cookie, and one on the night they got engaged. She’d worn the earrings he got for her. In Bethenny’s interview, she says she’s tired of this. It’s not the life she wants, but it’s hard to break away from this. Harder than you think. She tells Lanie, you never know. She should have kept the card from the flowers the new guy sent. Lanie says she saved it.
Ramona is meeting LuAnn and Sonja at a salon, and she brings Coco with her. She says Coco is getting a blowout. She wants Coco with her because she’s getting old, and time with her is precious. She explains that Coco might only have a good year left. In her interview, LuAnn wonders if she’s giving the dog a death wish. The stylist says, dogs are welcome. Ramona tells LuAnn that she was funny when they went out to dinner, and wanted to stay at the hotel. LuAnn says she’s super sensitive right now, and in touch with her emotions. Ramona says she never saw LuAnn like that, and LuAnn says she was pissed and made a scene. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. Or, as my father used to add, gets replaced. Ramona is glad she didn’t stay at the hotel. LuAnn says she’s glad too, since she was able to reconnect with Dorinda. In her interview, she says she and Dorinda were like sisters; they were raised the same way. It’s nice to be back as friends, and not in the drama. Sonja joins them, and declines a drink. LuAnn asks if she remembers talking to Barbara at the table. Sonja says she apologized, but had wanted to punch Barbara’s lights out, but she wasn’t the only one to step on toes. Tinsley and Dorinda told Bethenny what LuAnn had said about Bethenny not being queen, and she should have the room. LuAnn doesn’t give a sh*t. In Ramona’s interview, she can’t believe LuAnn is rolling her eyes, since Bethenny helped her when she was on her flat ass. Or flat, drunk ass. Sonja says Bethenny just got LuAnn a lawyer, and remember the intervention? After having to think about that, LuAnn appreciates it, but says the least Bethenny can do is give her the goddam room. I think she’s joking, but then she makes fun of Bethenny, and then I think she’s just being mean. In her interview, she says she never knows where she stands with Bethenny. One day, Bethenny is saving her life, and the next, bashing her with a baseball bat. She tells them if Bethenny wants to be upset with her, bring it on.
Sonja and Ramona go to a flower place. Ramona is happy she and Bethenny are in a good place. She’s getting two arrangements for Bethenny’s dinner party table. She asks what Sonja is wearing, and Sonja tells her not to ask Bethenny dumb [sic] questions that she could google, like what sparkly means. She also thinks Ramona should cool it with the flowers. In her interview, Sonja says Ramona is overdoing it, as usual. They move on to lunch.
Tinsley meets LuAnn for lunch. LuAnn says the crosstown traffic was a nightmare. Tell me about it. The one and only time I ever took a bus was when I thought I could get across town faster than walking. Wrong. LuAnn wonders why we don’t have cars that hover. In her interview, LuAnn says the hardest part of staying sober is not picking up a drink each day. She takes it day by day, and it’s a struggle. Tinsley tells LuAnn that her dad was an alcoholic, and died three years ago. Alcohol didn’t kill him, but he ended up falling when he was drinking, and had frontal lobe damage. He went into a coma, and after two weeks died in a hospice. She hasn’t been around someone with drinking issues since then. Her reaction was always why does she have to walk on eggshells because someone is drinking. She’s angry at him for dying. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she pushes back when someone has a drinking problem. she tells LuAnn that she thinks the person is choosing over their loved ones. LuAnn says, most people think alcoholics chose drinking, but that’s not the truth. It’s a disease. Tinsley starts to cry, saying, she doesn’t see it like that. LuAnn says people can’t control it. Tinsley says if a person is allergic to peanuts, they don’t eat them, but LuAnn says it’s a disease of the mind. The mind doesn’t think correctly. In her interview, Tinsley says she doesn’t have sympathy even when she should, because she lived it. LuAnn says Tinsley needs to forgive her father. Tinsley says she’s still dealing with the loss, and LuAnn says, you go through phases, and she’s stuck in angry. She suggests Tinsley go to Al-Anon, and explains that it helps the families and friends of alcoholics by sharing experiences. She thinks it would help Tinsley. (Very useless trivia. My husband and I both worked for Al-Anon’s main office when we met. Loved my job. Hated non-profit pay.) Tinsley jumps to another subject by telling LuAnn that she’s hosting the Big Apple Circus. In her interview, she says she’s working with a publicist again. He’s been letting people know she’s available to host different events, and she got the gig. She’s going to be the guest ring master. LuAnn thinks she’ll look adorable in the outfit.
Bethenny gets her hair done, while also getting a vitamin IV. The nurse says it will give her energy, but Bethenny doesn’t want any more energy. She just wants health and wellness. In her interview, she says she’s multitasking, and it’s a cluster f**k. She’s giving a dinner party, and has no time to waste. Welcome to her world. She tells the stylist that her ex-boyfriend Russ is there. She didn’t know he was coming, and she’d just had a facial. It’s not when you want to see your ex. He has a staffing company, and any time she’s hired them, he didn’t come. This time, he showed up. She says they dated last summer, and were madly in love, but Dennis came in hot. She phased out and disappeared. It was a disaster. Russ, who is gorgeous and brought his dog, tells Bethenny that he has to go. She asks him to give her five minutes. The stylist says she didn’t expect him to be that fine. Bethenny tells Russ that she’s sorry, and hugs him. He tells her not to scare his guys. She says, they could get scared. They could get laid, but probably don’t want to. In Bethenny’s interview, she says they’re in for a bumpy ride. Her skin won’t be the only bumpy thing tonight.
It’s Bethenny’s first official party. She hasn’t had a formal dinner party there, and she’s proud of her home. It’s beautiful, but homey, and she wants to use it. In a shocking twist, Ramona asks for vodka in a large wine glass with a lot of ice. Then she asks for a straw. Dorinda suggests giving her a crazy straw, and I literally lol. Lanie brings a metal straw, and Ramona asks if she can take it home with her. Geez. She can’t buy one of her own. Even I have one I bought at a flea marker. Tinsley comes in next, followed by Sonja, who says Bethenny always has the best food. Dorinda says she got flowers from LuAnn, thanking her for the weekend, and saying she was happy they made up. Everyone is thrilled Barbara comes bearing wine. A caviar and vodka spread is brought out. Barbara wonders where LuAnn is, and Sonja says she’ll probably come in wearing a Chiquita headdress. Bethenny says, every day is a cabaret. Ramona tells Bethenny not to be upset, but she has a date at 8 o’clock. Bethenny says, do you, and the bell rings. Bethenny says, the cabaret has begun. She’s an hour and fifteen minutes late. In Bethenny’s interview, she says, when you’re a cabaret star, time means something very different. The Countess is here. The cabaret can begin. LuAnn complains about traffic, and not only did she just use that one, in Sonja’s interview, she says they all came from uptown. She can’t believe LuAnn played the traffic card.
Bethenny says they had a breakthrough in the Berkshires, and toasts to them all being in a good place. And everyone being sparkly. Dorinda toasts Barbara surviving the fish bedroom, saying she’s probably woken up with scarier things than the shark. Taking the high road, Barbara says, it was lovely. In her interview, she says she knows what Dorinda is doing, and she’s not taking the bait like that tacky shark. Bethenny suggests a game of Truth or Dare, which never goes well. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she hates that game, pointing out the last time didn’t go well. We flash back to Carole – who I apparently don’t miss, because I always forget she was on this show – asking how old Tinsley was when she had anal sex. Bethenny says she’ll take either. Ramona says, dare, and asks if Bethenny thinks she’ll fall in love again. I guess Ramona used up her smarts for the day, and they have to explain that’s a truth. Ramona’s excuse is that she’s just enjoying the ambience. In her interview, Bethenny says, when she doesn’t want to strangle Ramona, it’s joyful to laugh with and at her. LuAnn dares Bethenny to kiss Barbara, and she does, declaring Barbara a good kisser. Ramon has to go, and Sonja says she didn’t come to watch Bethenny make out with Barbara. In her interview, Sonja admits to being jealous, and wanting to beat Barbara there. Barbara asks if Tinsley has ever kissed a girl. Tinsley says, never, and Sonja wonders how she and Scott do it. In Tinsley’s interview, she says just because she has manners, and dresses a certain way, doesn’t mean she’s not a freak in the sheets. Dorinda is up next, and says she’ll do anything but show a body part. Bethenny ask about phone sex, but that’s not how Dorinda rolls. In Dorinda’s interview, she imitates someone having phone sex, and says, they’d run. It’s not her thing. Bethenny wants her to call John, and put it on speaker. She calls and says she can’t wait to see him. They haven’t had sexy time in a while, and she misses him. He likes what he hears, and she sends him a huge kiss. The woman are gesturing, but it’s more sweet than sexy. After the call, Dorinda says it was the best she can do. Okay, that was funny. Bethenny hugs her. Sonja says it was good for her. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she can always count on John for sex talk.
Bethenny asks if Tinsley has had phone sex, and that’s another never. Barbara tells her to start tonight. Get Scott on the phone. Bethenny can’t believe they’re not together, and never do it. How many Chanel bags can she get in a week? Sonja says she’d rather have sex than a Chanel bag. Tinsley tells them that she loves him, and to stop it. Bethenny dares her to tell Scott that he’s the love of her life, and she wants to be engaged by the end of the year. Sonja says, just call. Bethenny says she’s got nothing else, and Tinsley gets up. In her interview, Bethenny says she didn’t ask Tinsley to screw Scott in her apartment; just call him. Tinsley and LuAnn go out for a smoke. In Tinsley’s interview, she says when they get boyfriends, they can tell how to react to this. She tells LuAnn that Scott would kill her.
Bethenny tells Sonja that she’s never kissed a woman, but she can’t pass up a dare. In her interview, Tinsley knows they’d be giggling in the background, and Scott would be upset. She doesn’t want to make him mad. She goes back to the table, and Bethenny wonders why be friends if they can’t talk. Barbara says maybe Tinsley doesn’t want to be friends, and Dorinda accuses Barbara of instigating. Barbara says she’s sitting in the group; she’s not staying out of it. Make her. Dorinda fakes some boxing moves, and LuAnn says Barbara has a hammer. In Barbara’s interview, she says Dorinda has a vision to get her. She wonders what she did. LuAnn says she went to the bathroom, came back, and look what happened. Sonja says Barbara was being provocative, saying Tinsley didn’t want to be friends. Bethenny wants to clarify that it’s not Tinsley’s fault. She apologizes for striking a chord, but doesn’t know where the lines are. She doesn’t know what’s a bad thing to do. In her interview, Tinsley says they can all think whatever they want to think. Her relationship with Scott is delicate and tricky. He’s uncomfortable with her being in the spotlight as it is. She’ll be happy if she can get it to all fit together.
Bethenny says Tinsley doesn’t have to tell them anything. She knows it must be hard. Tinsley says it is. She’s trying to make it work every day, and it’s literally torture. Bethenny says Tinsley can’t just be happy when he is; that’s not how it works in life. Tinsley says that’s how it works in her life. In her interview, Bethenny says Tinsley sets women back a hundred years. Tinsley says she doesn’t know what to do; she’s doing the best she can. Dorinda hugs her, and she cries. Dorinda says they’re all going through stuff. In her interview, Dorinda asks, what is she afraid of? Fear shouldn’t be part of this thing called a relationship. Bethenny says she’s really sorry, but Tinsley doesn’t seem that happy. It seems like her relationship is in a box. Tinsley says Scott is different from everyone she’s dated. Bethenny asks if he’s controlling, and Tinsley admits he has some controlling ways. Bethenny says she’s a strong, beautiful woman. Does she need for him to be in control? Tinsley says it’s a juggling act. Every day there’s a new headache. Bethenny thinks she should be with someone who accepts her the way she is. Tinsley whines that she loves him. In Bethenny’s interview, she says Scott is driving the car, but she’s not sure Tinsley is even in the car. She hugs Tinsley, who cries some more. She says it seems like Tinsley is under pressure and stress. It doesn’t seem healthy or happy. She doesn’t have to let him drive. It works for his life, but not hers.
LuAnn says she’d also like to offer some advice. Take the truth, not the dare next time.
Next time, the group goes to the circus (like this isn’t enough of one), LuAnn asks if Ramona hooked up with Mario, Tinsley breaks up and makes up, Dorinda tells Ramona not to lie, and Ramona pushes Dorinda. That last one is probably a really bad idea.
👎 Honestly, this poor girl needs to move on. This is not the dude for her, and she’ll never be happy. She loves the limelight, and he hates her being in it? No. Just no. I think the pressure from Mama Dale doesn’t help either.
👑 A Hotline For the Throne…
This is too funny. Jimmy Kimmel set up a hotline for Game of Thrones questions.
⛳ About That Weekend…
I can see it in the distance.