Category Archives: Lisa Vanderpump

August 2, 2019 – Some Of Drew’s Past Is Revealed, Finding OLTL, Billie Lee Moves On, Cindy Who, Almost Ten Quotes & Royal Weekend


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Puerto Rico. Sasha wonders why she and Michael are so good together. Maybe it’s the island. Michael thinks it’s more because of her. The more he more knows her, the more he cares about her. She says, that must be it. She feels the same way about him. They kiss.

On the phone, Cassandra says it’s lovely there, but time for her to move on. She thanks them for making the arrangements, and asks what time she needs to be at the air strip. She says, perfect. She’s having breakfast with some very important guests.

Finn starts to go into Kelly’s, and sees Hayden pop out. He asks if she’s leaving. She says she’s decided to go someplace else. He says if he didn’t know better, he’d think she’s trying to avoid him. Maybe she regrets something she said last night.

At Kelly’s with Jason and Elizabeth, Jake wants to celebrate. The game was rained out, but Jason caught a ball. Elizabeth says maybe they’ll have a make-up game, and Jake says the only thing that would make it more perfect is if Franco was with them.

Kim gives Cameron the paperwork for the car, including a death certificate from the DMV, making it official. I don’t think that’s how it works, but okay.

At Rice Plaza, Sam thanks Willow for meeting her. Willow thanks Sam again for her help with nailing Shiloh. Sam says that’s why she asked to meet. She needs more information about Shiloh’s time in Afghanistan.

Chase knocks on Drew’s office door. Curtis answers, and says he’s glad Chase could make it. Chase knows the flashdrive is missing, and Drew says it holds all of Andre’s notes, and Drew’s memories prior to 2012. Chase says, assuming that’s what Shiloh was after, what does Drew think he could do with it on his own? Drew doubts Shiloh could anything without help.

At a cheap hotel. Shiloh thanks Cabot for meeting him. It’s less conspicuous than the MetroCourt. Cabot says he prefers five-star accommodations when possible, but to each his own. Shiloh is facing multiple felony charges, and he’s broke. Shiloh says he has reserves in Afghanistan. Drew knows where they are, and it’s why he needs to access Drew’s memories. Cabot asks if he’s still planning on transferring the memories to Drew’s twin.

Jason tells Jake, the Chucks are having a great season. Jake says, too bad Franco isn’t into sports. He’s a little artsy, but Jake thinks he’d like them if he tried watching. Elizabeth points out Jake’s friend Blain is at the counter, and Jake goes over to show him the ball. Elizabeth asks Jason, what just happened? She thought he’d made peace with Franco. Jason tells her that he didn’t say anything, but she says his silence speaks volumes. Jason sighs, and she says he’s still doing it. Doesn’t it make a difference that Franco is her husband and Jake’s stepdad? Jason says he respects her choices, but doesn’t have to agree with them. She asks if he doesn’t see that what he’s doing will affect Jake. He was trying to sell Jason on Franco, and when Jason diverted the conversation, Jake tried harder. Jason says he’s not saying anything negative, but he’s not going to lie either. Elizabeth says Jason still doesn’t forgive Franco for what he did when he was sick. It was a long time ago, and Franco’s not the same man. What will it take for Jason to accept that?

Cameron says he didn’t know cars were this complicated. Kim says, the policy is paid until the end of the year, and gives him the extra key. Cameron says, great, he guesses. Kim says, it’s okay, and Cameron says, of course (🍷) he’s excited. It’s a car, but it was Oscar’s car, and he’s not here anymore. Cameron leaves, and Franco says, sorry. He can’t imagine what Kim is going through. If there’s anything he can do, let him know. It might sound silly or strange, but if she wants to try art therapy… She says she’s trying to work things out in traditional therapy, but since he asked, there is something she’d like from him.

Sam asks if Willow knows any details about Shiloh’s time in Afghanistan. Willow says he told them basically the same story that’s in the book. Money motivated him until he saw the dawn; blah-blah-blah. Sam asks if he mentioned anyone who was there besides Drew. Like a Charles Owens, nicknamed Tex.

Curtis says the theft was perfect timing. He was having cameras installed next week. Drew asks if Chase got the MetroCourt footage, and Chase says, it’s being reviewed now. They brought Shiloh in for questioning, and while he was there, sent a team to gather evidence. Shiloh has an alibi for the time frame. Drew says, of course (🍷). Chase says he denied hiring anyone, but they’re focusing on any remaining followers. They know Shiloh’s pattern of getting them to take the fall. Drew says Shiloh wouldn’t stop asking about the flashdrive, and Chase wonders how he knew where it was. Drew says he never discussed it with Shiloh, and Chase asks if he ever talked in public about it. Drew says, several times, and Chase says if a Dawnie heard, they could have passed the information to Shiloh.

Shiloh tells Cabot that he wants the memories transferred by any means necessary, but Cabot suggests he exercise caution. They don’t need the subject in a diminished state. Shiloh says, what if they’re injected with something? What if something goes wrong? Is there a back-up plan? Cabot says, if one twin is ineffective, the other twin might serve.

Chase asks why Shiloh would want the flashdrive with Drew’s memories on it? Drew says they were in Afghanistan together. He served as a SEAL, and Shiloh was a contractor. He thinks it has something to do with their association. Chase says, Shiloh is desperate, and Curtis says, the more desperate Shiloh becomes, the more dangerous he is. Chase says, Shiloh is staying at the Midwood Hotel. He’s going to get a warrant to have the room searched before Shiloh has a chance to do anything with the flashdrive. He’ll be in touch.

Shiloh tells Cabot that Drew is already suspicious, since the flashdrive was stolen from his office. How soon will Cabot be ready? Cabot says he needs a few essential supplies for the procedure. He asks Shiloh for the flashdrive, and Shiloh asks, why now? Cabot says Shiloh just told him that Drew suspects. If Shiloh is on the police’s radar, doesn’t he think it will be safer? Shiloh says Cabot was just released from the WSB, and Cabot says he was given an outright release. He has no charges pending in this or any other country. It’s a pity Shiloh can’t say the same.

Willow tells Sam that she doesn’t remember Shiloh ever mentioning Tex. He always made it all about himself. How he used to do anything for money. He did the contracts looking for a payoff, and came close until fate stepped in, in the form of an EID. Sam repeats, he said payoff, and Willow says, before he was hurt, he was planning on cashing out and leaving the next day.

Kim tells Franco, it’s pretty simple. Just keep being a good friend to Drew. He puts on a great façade, but he’s hurting. He keeps his feelings tight, and he’s not letting them out. He needs to let them out. Franco says he’s there for Drew. She is too, right? She’s not going anywhere? She says she has to check on a patient. Tell Cameron, enjoy the car. She’s glad he has it.

Elizabeth tells Jason that she gets it. Time stopped for him, but not for the rest of them. Franco isn’t the same man. Jason says it doesn’t matter what he feels. Elizabeth says, like it or not, Franco has been more of a constant in Jake’s life than he has. If he disapproves, Jake will have divided loyalties. Does he want to be that kind of dad who turns a kid against his stepfather? Jason says he wants to be the kind of dad who doesn’t lie. When Jake is old enough to understand who Franco is, he’ll know Jason has been honest. He’s not pretending acceptance he doesn’t feel.

Franco asks Cameron, what’s up? Cameron says he didn’t realize how much of a pain a car is. Gas, plates, inspections. Franco says he can handle it, but Cameron says his mom is going to take the keys for safekeeping, and there’s the parking. Franco says he’s taking care of the parking problem.

Hayden tells Finn that she had too much drink. She doesn’t remember what she said. He says he can’t remember either. It must not have been important. She says, what a coincidence, him being there. Finn says he had no idea she’d be there, and Hayden says, but he just crashed the party? Who was the woman he was talking about? Cassandra. Is she another ex?

Michael says Sasha is amazing, and she says he is too. After all that exercise, she’s starving. He says, him too, and she says they should shower – only shower – and meet Sandy. Michael suggests they stay, and order room service, but Sasha says, Sandy is obviously lonely. Why would she near-invite strangers to breakfast? It will only take an hour. Consider it a random act of kindness. Michael says, how bad can it be?

Still on the phone, Cassandra says she’s meeting the friend she mentioned for breakfast. She thanks them for getting the perfect gift to enhance their breakfast. We see a syringe in her purse.

Cameron says there’s no more parking on their street, and Franco tells him that his dad’s office isn’t far. He’s giving Cameron a dedicated parking spot. Cameron says, for real? His own parking spot? How is he going to pay for it? Franco says his pop will take care of that too. He’s had a rough time lately, losing his father and stepmom. He could use some family. He gives Cameron a parking pass to hang on the mirror.  Kim comes by, and says she just called the insurance company, and put the policy in Cameron’s name. They’ll send it to him, along with an ID to put in the glovebox. Cameron promises to do everything right. He tells Franco to thank Scotty too. He leaves, and Kim says, it looks like Oscar’s gift is doing some good.

Elizabeth tells Jason that she doesn’t care if he wants to disrespect Franco, but he’s disrespecting her. She’d never put the kids in danger. Jason says, that doesn’t erase the pain Franco inflicted on Sam. She carries it every day, along with everyone else he hurt. Aiden has no idea what happened, but what happens when he’s old enough to look it up for himself? Elizabeth asks if he can never factor in the good things that Franco did after his tumor was removed. He bailed out the hospital, helped Jason break Carly out of Ferncliff, and helped catch Ryan. She has to go to work, but maybe he can try to give her credit for knowing the man she married. She tells Jake they have to go, but Jake wants to hang out with his dad. Elizabeth asks Jason if it’s okay, and he says, of course (🍷). Jake asks if Jason was hurt, catching the ball with no glove. He says, it stung a little, but there’s nothing he could do for Jake or Danny that would ever hurt.

Willow asks if Sam thinks Shiloh has money stashed somewhere. Sam says it’s totally possible. He probably would have run, except for the explosion. Willow tells her that he said it was a fortune. Shiloh sees them, and says his two favorite ladies in one spot. He’s staying at the Midwood motel, which is less than luxurious. They’re just what he needed to make his day.

Drew tells Curtis that he’s still waiting for information on Charles Tex Owens. He was married stateside when he was on leave. He had a few weeks to go before the explosion. Drew wonders if it was a coincidence Tex was there, or did he and Shiloh have a prior connection?

Finn tells Hayden, Cassandra isn’t an ex. She was part of a drug cartel, and tried to kill him, Anna, and Valentin. He wanted to warn them in person that Cassandra had been spotted. Hayden asks how he got mixed up in a drug cartel. Did Cassandra try to kill him because of Anna?  It doesn’t sound like a safe or healthy choice. He says, when love is put on the line – unconditional love – you give up your life for someone else. They had that once, a long time ago. He was angry that she destroyed it, but she was really right; he should thank her.

In a private cabana, Cassandra injects a grapefruit half. Michael and Sasha arrive, and she thanks them for joining her. She says she took the liberty of ordering. She asks about Sasha’s dress designer, but Sasha doesn’t know anything about it. She says her mother insists on giving her samples, but she doesn’t keep up with the trends. Cassandra tells Michael, it must be a relief to be with someone not concerned about image. Michael says, Sasha doesn’t have to worry about image. She’s uniquely herself. He’s lucky she chose him. Sasha says she’s the lucky one, and digs into the grapefruit.

Cassandra tells Sasha that she loved the article on Ava. It took her emotions in different directions. Not many editors could pull that off. It was a huge success; one of many. Nina has so much talent; a successful career, an adoring daughter, beautiful and brilliant. Sasha thinks the grapefruit is a little bitter, and Michael offers her his, but she declines. Cassandra says she’d love a selfie with her two new beautiful friends, so she can remember their time there. Michael gets in the middle, and Cassandra takes the picture.

Finn tells Hayden, she was right to run out. She says, a lot went down. She got scared. He says she was smart; smarter than him. She saw through them. They never would have made it. She says, no. They weren’t meant for each other. In time, they would have fallen apart. He thanks her for her honesty, and Hayden says, if she thinks about it, he’s better off with who he’s with now. He says, so is she, and she says she hopes she never sees him again, and leaves. He says, same.

Willow can’t believe Shiloh is out on bail. He says it’s the first step to his exoneration. He’s on the way to his attorney’s office. Chase appears, and says he’ll save Shiloh a trip. He stopped by Shiloh’s motel room – how the mighty have fallen. Shiloh says, it’s a place to stay, not a state of mind, which is actually a pretty good one. Sam tells Willow that she has an excellent plastic surgeon, if she wants her tattoo removed, and Sam will take care of the cost. Sam leaves, and Shiloh says Willow can erase the tattoo, but not the constant reminder of what they shared. Chase tells him to step away from Willow, or he’ll arrest Shiloh for violating the terms of his bail.

Elizabeth tells Jason, everything worked out. He’s back with Sam, and Danny is happy. Is he? Jason says, it’s all good. Cameron comes in, and asks if Jake caught the ball. Jake says his dad did, and Cameron says, cool. He asks if Jake is ready to go to camp. Jake says he’s bringing donuts, and goes to the counter. Cameron says, Jake loves baseball almost as much art. He’s always drawing, and Franco encourages him. He says, sorry. He knows Jason isn’t really into Franco. Jason asks what Cameron thinks.

Elizabeth goes to the hospital and sees Kim at the reception desk. She gives Kim a giftbag, telling her, it’s a swag bag from the reception. She’s glad Kim could make it, but sorry they didn’t spend time together. She had a lot going on. Kim says, tell her about it. Elizabeth says she remembers Kim said she wanted to get pregnant again. Kim says she did something at the party that crossed the line. She had to take a look at how she’s dealing – or not dealing – with her grief, and get back to a semblance of normalcy. Elizabeth says she’s been through a major ordeal. Kim says she thought work would, but being around babies is harder than she thought. Everything is. Elizabeth says, there’s no right way to grieve. You just learn to cope, and take the time you need to heal. Kim says she’s starting to realize she might need distance too. She doesn’t think she can stay in Port Charles.

Curtis says Tex was on his superior’s radar. Something tells him that Drew was Tex’s superior. Drew says, there was something in the paperwork that wasn’t redacted and stood out. It said he had an appointment to meet with NCIS, but he was snatched before the meeting happened. Curtis says, it had to be serious, and Drew says he’ll check his email and see if the Navy got back to him.

Cassandra asks which picture Sasha likes better. Sasha picks one, and Cassandra agrees. She says, sadly, she’s leaving the island to get back to business. She tells them, stay and enjoy their meal. They’re a delightful couple, and she hopes to see them again someday. She tells Sasha to give Nina her compliments. Sasha says it was nice meeting her, but Cassandra says the pleasure was all hers. She leaves, and Michael says he’s glad she’s gone. Sasha says, her too. She’s exhausting. Michael says he can think of better ways to be exhausted. Sasha says that’s why they’re simpatico, and they kiss. Geez, get a room.

Elizabeth asks if Kim is sure she wants to leave, but Kim says she’s not sure of anything. What she’s doing isn’t working. Maybe it’s time for a change. She wants Elizabeth to know how much she appreciates her, and how glad she is they became friends. Elizabeth says, her too. She asks, what about Julian? He cares about her. Is she ready to leave him? Kim says he’s been wonderful, her rock, but she keeps spiraling. Elizabeth says she owes it to herself to take whatever time she needs to grieve. Kim says she’s no good for Julian or anyone right now. Elizabeth asks if Julian shouldn’t be the one to decide that. She thinks Julian would like Kim to stay, and for the record, so would she.

Drew tells Curtis that he called NCIS, and got a sympathetic agent who knew who he was, and remembered his disappearance. Drew told him that he needed to find any records of his deployment, and the agent said he’d get back to him this morning. Drew gets on his laptop, and says he’s a man of his word. He reads, and tells Curtis that he did ask for a meeting. He suspected one of his men was conspiring with a military contractor to sell fuel on the black market. Curtis asks what Drew wants to bet the contractor was David Henry Archer, aka Shiloh.

Shiloh tells Chase, easy. He’s just taking a stroll like any law abiding citizen, and ran into the mother of his child. He was saying hello, not breaking any laws. Chase says he’d arranged to meet Willow there, and her order of protection against Shiloh has been approved. He hands Shiloh a paper, saying, he’s been duly served. He’s required to stay 300 feet away from Willow at all times. He’s also to refrain from contacting Brad, Lucas, or Wiley. Shiloh smirks, and Chase tells Shiloh, if he sees any of them, he should cross the street. Or better yet, go in the opposite direction. Chase gives Willow her copy, and Shiloh asks if this is really necessary. Chase tells him, it is, and to stay away from her. If he violates bail, it will be revoked, and he’ll be remanded to Pentonville. Chase says, that’s his cue, and Shiloh says he was just leaving. When he’s gone, Chase hugs Willow, and asks if she’s okay. She says she’ll feel better when they finally put Shiloh away. Chase thinks it will be sooner rather than later. If his warrant goes through, he’ll have additional evidence.

Finn is shocked to see Cabot at the hospital. He asks what Cabot doing there when he’s supposed to be in custody? Cabot says congratulate him. He’s been released. Finn asks how he managed that, and Cabot says he cooperated with the WSB. He told them everything he knew about memory transfer. Finn can feel free to confirm it with his contacts. Finn asks if there’s any complications with his original study, and if he should be concerned for Anna. Cabot says, no, and Finn asks what he’s doing there then.

Cameron tells Jason that he and Franco don’t always get along, but Franco has always been good to them. He thinks Franco is pretty okay. He goes to get Jake, and Jason’s phone rings. It’s Sam, who says she broke into Shiloh’s motel room. She’s looking for the flashdrive. Jason asks where Shiloh is, and she says, he has a meeting with his lawyer. She should have time. He tells her, please be careful, and call when she’s done. She says, of course (🍷), and starts going through the drawers

Michael asks Sasha, gambling or sailing? and she asks if they can do both. He says he likes her style. She says, how lucky is she? She’s in an extraordinary place with an extraordinary guy. it’s her dream. He says he feels the same, and they kiss. We see the empty grapefruit rind.

Sam continues to search, rifling through drawers. She looks underneath one of them, and finds the flashdrive. She takes it, and jets, but opens the door to Shiloh. I say, oh! out loud, even though I suspected that would happen.

Willow thanks Chase. She wishes it was as easy to get rid of Shiloh for good. He says, the DA is confident he’ll get a conviction, and Shiloh will go to prison. She’ll never have to see him again. It’s not easy on anyone, especially her, but it’s almost over.

Drew says they were selling fuel on the black market, but he was kidnapped before he had a chance to make a report. Curtis says, Shiloh has had a year. Why is he hot to trot now? Drew says he clearly wants to uncover something. Maybe he stole something he needs to get to, and only Drew knows about it.

Elizabeth suggests she and Franco take Kim and Julian out for dinner. Kim says she’ll ask Julian. She leaves, and Franco tells Elizabeth that almost everything is taken care of with the car. She thanks him, and says Cameron just needs to get his license back, and one of them will have to be in the car with him. Franco says not him. He remembers what the psychic said. She says that he won’t be feeling himself? but he says, not that one; the other one. He doesn’t want to worry her, but the psychic said, don’t take that drive. She asks if he thinks it’s in Cameron’s car, and he asks, what else could it be?

Finn says Cabot is the last person he expected to see picking up a prescription. Cabot says, no worries. He shan’t be staying.

Jason tells Blain and Jake to have fun at Lila’s Kids. His phone rings. It’s Shiloh. Jason asks what the hell he wants, and how did he get Jason’s number? Shiloh says Sam gave it to him. More or less. If Jason wants to see her alive, he’ll do what Shiloh tells him. The clock is ticking.

On Monday, Finn tells Drew that they have a potential situation, Obrecht confronts Brad about trying to kill her, and Jason attacks Shiloh.

🔥 Eterna Lives On…

One Life to Live was always my favorite soap. They had a wicked sense of humor, and although it didn’t always work out, they weren’t afraid to take chances. Like the time Vicki went to the Old West. Or heaven. They also gave us Roger Howarth, the best soap actor out there IMO. It’s attached to so many good memories too. I was blessed to visit the set once, and everyone was warm and inviting. And Bo winked at me.

💃 The Ballad of Billie Lee…

I think the two key points are, with the help of so many powerful people, including Lisa, I now have the opportunity to lead my own projects that you will see in 2020, [Billie] wrote, and Radar reported Lee is working on creating her own show after ditching VPR.

It looks like her gripes have been rewarded with bigger and better things. By no means am I discounting the issues that go along with being trans, but she did make a big deal about some things that were not what she made them out to be. Like being left out of the Girls Night planning. The only people who were involved were show cast members who have been a tight group (well, off and on) for a long time. News flash: she was never in the opening credits. And in a moment that was glossed over, Katie even said they were still pissed at her for something else that had happened, so they didn’t invite her. If that’s not treating her like one of the girls, I don’t know what is.

👯 And In a Similar Vein…

Another Housewife I don’t remember very well, putting her hazy fifteen minutes to good use.

🎐 Quotes of the Week

There is just one life for each of us: our own. – Euripides

Freedom means the opportunity to be what we never thought we would be. – Daniel J. Boorstin

Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. – George Bernard Shaw

Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.Benjamin Spock

Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room. – Phyllis Diller

There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.Maya Angelou

Our Age of Anxiety is, in great part, the result of trying to do today’s job with yesterday’s tools and yesterday’s concepts. – Marshall McLuhan

Life is too short to waste your time on people who don’t respect, appreciate, and value you.Roy T. Bennett

No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.Christopher Morley

🎡 Have a Lalapalooza of a Weekend…

And be the king or queen of it. Even if it just involves sleeping in.

August 1, 2019 – Neil Tells Alexis About Joanna, New York Brokers Are Back, OC Soon, Stassi’s Reward & French Chick


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

In Puerto Rico. Michael says he has seen Cassandra before, in Port Charles at the MetroCourt restaurant. His mom is the owner, and he’s there all the time. She says he has a good memory for faces. It was a couple of years ago. She’d been there for a meeting, hoping to interest Michael’s father in a business proposal. Sasha says she must not be in the fashion industry, and Cassandra says she likes to keep up with the trends, but no. Michael asks what business she’s in, and she says, nothing nearly as exciting. Import/export.

Nina downs her drink, and on the side, Valentin tells her to pace herself. One of the drinks has the truth serum in it. She asks, which one? but he says, it’s hard tell now, since everyone has their glasses. She tells him to stay near her, and if she rambles, stop her. Jax tells Finn that he wants to be clear, he and Hayden are business associates; nothing more. Any indication that she’s given Finn that they’re together isn’t true.

In a hallway upstairs, Hayden says, if Valentin is following Nikolas’s footsteps, this should be the office. She starts to open a door, and is startled by someone behind her. A housekeeper asks what she thinks she’s doing.

Lulu drinks to true love; something Peter knows nothing about. Her doorbell rings, and she says, go away. Laura says, let her in. Lulu opens the door, and Laura tells her, it’s nasty out there. Lulu is lucky she has no place to be. Lulu says, no place to be; no one to be with. She’s so lucky. She drinks some more.

Carly calls Enrique in Puerto Rico. She’s wondering how Michael is doing, and if he’s having a good time. She wants to send them some champagne. Sonny takes the phone from her hand, and talks to Enrique in Spanish, including Carly’s name. Carly asks if Sonny just told him not to accept her calls. He says, his island, his rules.

Alexis and Neil are in the elevator, when it stops. Neil says, it must be the storm. The power is out, Alexis says, excellent, and Neil says it looks like they’re stuck.

Cassandra says she almost feels guilty; it’s storming back home. Sasha hopes Nina’s dinner party wasn’t rained out. She tells Cassandra that Jasper Jax and Hayden Barnes are the dinner guests. Why she would tell a total stranger this, I have no idea. Cassandra says, the names sound familiar. Maybe their paths crossed in Italy. She excuses herself to make a phone call. Sasha says, she seems nice. Michael says he knows who’s nicer, and Sasha says it had better be her. He says, definitely her, and they kiss.

Carly tells the MetroCourt patrons that she’s sure they came out for a nice, relaxing dinner, but the storm had other plans. The MetroCourt is going to take care of them though; the night is on them. If they haven’t received an entrée yet, they can’t cook with no electricity, but there are cold items and a generous wine list. She tells them, enjoy their evening. Sonny says, that’s pricey, but she says everyone will talk about how fabulous they are. Besides, her hotel, her rules.

Neil pushes the elevator buttons. Alexis says he was right about Kristina going to group therapy. Kristina thinks it’s helpful to talk to other cult survivors. He continues pressing all the buttons, and she tells him, stop doing that. They’re going to be in there until the power comes back, or someone comes to get them. He says he has no phone service. He’s got to get out. She says she has places to be too, but they’re there for the foreseeable future. Why doesn’t he bill her? They can do a session, and make good use of the time. He says he’s serious; he has to get out. She asks, what’s wrong? Is he claustrophobic? He says, no, but she says he’s clearly upset. It can’t just be because he’s stuck with her, could it? It’s a little extreme for that. He repeats that he has someplace he needs to be.

Hayden says she must have gotten turned around. The housekeeper wonders who she is, and Hayden introduces herself. The housekeeper asks if Valentin knows she’s there, and Hayden says she’s an invited dinner guest. She was looking for the restroom. The housekeeper says, that’s not it, and Hayden says she used to live there. She thought she could find her way, and was over-confident. The housekeeper asks if Hayden would like her to show the way back, and Hayden says, please.

Jax tells Nina that he was thinking about the idea she pitched, in the light of the favorable response to the Ava issue. Valentin thinks he’s downplaying that, and Nina says, it was a home run. Jax says he’s concerned about a continuing series on dangerous women. Nina suggests calling them complex or mysterious. She can think up a fabulous title. Jax says he doesn’t want their magazine to be the one that glorifies murder. The Ava issue was a one-off. Nina says, creativity is a bad idea that leads to a good one. There are a lot of interesting women. Helena Cassadine. Valentin says, no, and Jax agrees. Nina says, what about Cassandra Pierce? Finn nearly chokes on his drink. The woman comes in with Hayden, saying, she lost her way – or so she says.

Alexis asks Neil if she’s allowed to ask where, or is it a violation of their boundaries? Neil says his daughter died five years ago tonight. Alexis says she’s sorry. She doesn’t know what to say. He says, it’s almost cliché. A therapist who can help everyone, but those closest to him. He doesn’t know where or how, but somewhere, his daughter became a lost soul. Every time he tried to reach out… He says she knows how it is.

Laura gives Lulu some coffee. Lulu asks if Laura is sure she doesn’t want to open another bottle of wine. Laura is sure, and Lulu says, party pooper. Laura asks if that’s what this is; a party? Talk to her. Lulu says she’s trying to understand why Dante left. She’s put herself in his shoes. What would she have done? On one hand, as an objective outsider, she can see his perspective. But as his wife and the mother of his children… Laura says she’s sorry. She hates that this is happening to Lulu. Lulu says, that’s it exactly. It’s happening to her. She has no say and no choice. Not when Dante left, and certainly not when the divorce papers were delivered. Now she has to decide whether to let her marriage end or fight. No discussion, just an enormous decision she has to make completely alone. Laura says she knows it’s very hard, frustrating, and scary, but Lulu’s not alone.

The housekeeper says she found Hayden trying get in Valentin’s office. Jax says she must be mistaken. Windymere is a bit of a maze. She says, Hayden lived there, but Jax says, it was years ago, and Hayden has a notoriously bad sense of direction. She probably couldn’t find the powder room. Hayden says, no. She was snooping, and this lady busted her.

Carly tells Sonny that she’s calling the company who makes the generator. They’re going to fix it, and give her restitution, or she’ll sic Diane on them.

Alexis says that explains why Neil dedicated his life to helping others get out. He says he’s sorry. This is supposed to be her session, not his. Alexis sits on the floor. She says she’s had her share of AA meetings. She’s become an expert listener. Neil sits, and says, there were all the tell-tale patterns. She cut off her family, turned from her friends, and sold all of her possessions. Alexis says, and gave them the money, like Kristina did. He says, partly. This cult was into drugs. Alexis says, it must have been terrifying. He says he tried the tactics he used on others, but none of them worked on his own daughter. She took her own life. She was found in a bathtub, an empty bottle of pills on the floor, and pronounced dead right about now, at 9:47.

Alexis says now she knows why this night means something to him. She’s truly sorry he’s not getting to have a memorial for his daughter. Hopefully, it was postponed because of the storm. He says, it’s not that kind of memorial. Every year on the anniversary, he goes to a karaoke bar and sings a song from her childhood. She had trouble sleeping some nights, and the song put her out. He says, it’s a strange way to celebrate his daughter’s life, but Alexis says, not at all; it’s beautiful. She has trouble imagining him singing karaoke though. He says, it’s not pretty, but Joanna loved it. Until she joined the cult. She was fearless like that. Him, not so much. It’s a test every year to see if he can get through the song. Alexis says, but he does, and he says, yeah. A tribute to his daughter and an act of penance all in one. She asks, what song? and he says, Hush Little Baby (apparently, the only song ever sung to a child). Since they’re stuck in there, the guys will be spared this year. She says she’s not. She’s a captive audience; so sing.

Laura tells Lulu, Dante is a good man, who loves her and the kids more than anything. Lulu says, that’s what makes it so insane. Laura says, if he considers himself so broken that he’s willing to give them up, Lulu might not agree, but she can respect where the decision came from. Sometimes things can’t be fixed, and more damage is done by hanging on, and not accepting the loss. Lulu says she doesn’t want this. Laura says, if Lulu wants to fight it, she’s behind her 100%. All she can say is that she believes Dante made the choice out of love, and she doesn’t think he took it lightly. If he considers himself this far gone, maybe he is.

Sasha asks Michael what it was like, growing up with his own island. He says he was a holy terror as a kid, and she says, no way. He says, there were some rocky times. Times when it was really dangerous, or his parents were fighting and at odds, and they’d send the kids there. it was a safe haven. They could put away the crap hanging over them in Port Charles. It was still there when they came back, but while they were at the island, they didn’t think about it. A lot of people had troubles with their childhoods, but never had a refuge like this. (How insightful. Really, Michael?) He says he relaxes when he’s there. Sasha says, that’s what different.

Jax tells Hayden that she’s funny. She says, no. She went looking for Valentin’s office, knowing what she was doing. She was looking for the diamonds. Nina says, what diamonds? and Jax says they were something she left behind, and was hoping to locate them. Fleur says she needs to get back to Charlotte. She’s in the taxidermy room naming all the animals. Jax says, not every little girl likes taxidermy, and Fleur says, Charlotte isn’t every little girl.  Nina says, if Hayden wanted access, why didn’t she just ask? Jax says she didn’t want them to think she had an ulterior motive. She just wanted to reclaim what’s hers. Hayden walks over to Finn, and asks if he ever thinks about her. She can’t stop thinking about him. I guess we know who got the truth serum.

Michael says, so Sasha thinks he’s guarded and stiff. She says she didn’t say stiff. He’s warm and charming, and a million other wonderful things when they’re at home. People respect him, and the companies he runs. She starts listing his assets and the charities he’s involved with, and he says he gets it. There, he’s loosey goosey. Sasha finds a $25 chip on the floor, and gets all excited. Michael asks if she wants to skip sailing and go gambling. She says, that would be awesome, and he asks if she wants to gamble with real money or the house’s’ money. She asks what he means. He says the dealers are let known that the guest is going to win, and they have the best luck. Sasha says, that’s cheating, and he says, basically. She wants no part of that. She’s limiting herself to $100. If she wins, great; if she loses, so be it. He says she’ll only have to cough up $75. Cassandra returns, and asks if they’d like to join her for breakfast tomorrow at 8:30. They agree to be there, and she watches them leave.

Jax tells Hayden that she looks flushed. He’s getting her some water. He tries to drag her away from Finn, but she says she needs a moment alone with him. She brings Finn into another room. Valentin asks Jax if he thinks she’s all right. Jax says he’s not sure. He’s trying to figure out how she got so drunk on one drink. Nina says, Valentin makes strong martinis, and Jax says maybe she should stick to champagne next time. Nina says that’s his trademark. He brought it to her office to celebrate the magazine. He asks why she’s saying celebrate like it’s in quotes, and she says his own agenda was written all over it. He was trying to butter her up.

Lulu says it sounds like Laura is telling her to give up on her husband. Laura says she wants Lulu to trust her husband. Believe he has their best interests at heart. Laura believes he does. Lulu says she still doesn’t know what to do. Laura says she gets it, but this is life; things change. If she hadn’t been able to let go of Lulu’s father, she never would have found the happiness she has with Doc. It doesn’t happen for everyone, but sometimes life has a second act. She’s grateful she got hers.

Dev brings out a tray with caviar and champagne, and Carly asks what he’s doing. He says he thought she’d be okay with it, and she says, if it’s going to go bad, she is, but who gave him the keys to the champagne closet? He says he picked the lock. If she wants to keep it safe, she needs to up security. He goes back to work, and Carly tells Sonny, on one hand, she appreciates his initiative, but on the other, they won’t be able to afford it. Sonny says he’s got her covered.

Neil tells Alexis that she’s crazy, and she says that’s why she’s seeing a shrink. He says, the whole point is that he goes someplace where no one knows his name. She says, the anti-Cheers. He says, it’s between Joanna and himself. She says she’ll turn away and put her hands over her ears. Don’t let this stop him from doing something he needs to. He thanks her, but no. She says she’s apologizing in advance, but she has no choice. She starts to sing, hush, little baby, don’t say a word…

Hayden tells Finn that he’s stalling. Answer the question. Does he still think of her? He says, it doesn’t matter. He’s moved on. Hayden asks if he loves Anna, and he says he does. Hayden broke him when she left. It took him a long time to pick up the pieces, but he did. She says she knows he hates her. He says she saved his life, and she says he saved hers first. He says he couldn’t hate her, but she says she doesn’t know that.

Nina says it’s impossible to trust Jax. Valentin says his offer to buy the magazine still stands. No questions asked. Jax says he loves Crimson too, and he loves working with Nina. There’s nothing nefarious. He looks forward to the day he can prove that. Finn comes in, and says Hayden needs water. Hayden says she gets it; he’s moved on. But that doesn’t change the fact… She trails off.

Sasha is just out of the shower, and Michael asks if she’s okay. She says the last thing she feels like doing is putting on makeup and getting dressed. He says, the casino will still be there, and she has a standing invite. She says, and she has a $25 chip. He says, it’s fate. She has to come back. One question though. Since she doesn’t want to go gambling, what does she want to do instead? She kisses him, and they get busy during a song part.

Dev serves champagne. Sonny calls him over. Dev asks if there’s something wrong, and Sonny says, the opposite. Carly says, he’s doing a great job, and Sonny says he wants to give Dev more responsibility – working for him. He has a job if Dev wants it. Dev says he does, and asks if he’s to report to Jason or Sonny. He wants to learn from the best. Sonny says that’s exactly what he’ll be doing. Learning about the coffee business.

Neil and Alexis sing together. When the song is done, they look at each other. The elevator starts to move.

On the phone, Cassandra says, don’t say anything; just listen. She’s been compromised, and needs to relocate again needs to get something. A little gift for a new friend.

During pillow talk, Sasha thanks Michael for bringing her there; it’s special. He says he’s loved the island all his life, but this is the best time he’s had. She asks, why is that? and he says, Manuel’s mojitos, and adds, because of her. She asks if he answers every question with a joke first. He tells her that she’ll get used to it, and she says she plans to. They get busy again.

Carly says, what a night, and tells Sonny, Sasha is a nice girl. It’s nice (WOTD) to see Michael with someone his speed, enjoying life again as an adult. Sonny says, don’t mess things up. She says she’s not getting involved. She just wants to know how things are going. Sonny says, when Michael tells her, she’ll know. She says they should go to the island. He says, yeah, yeah, and steers her out.

Laura says, it looks like the rain stopped. Lulu thanks Laura for riding it out with her. The storm outside and the one that’s her life. Laura says she’ll figure it out. She’s just a phone call or text away. They hug, and Laura says, no more wine. Lulu agrees, and Laura leaves. Lulu looks around at her empty place, and looks at the divorce papers.

Neil tells Alexis, it looks like the power is back on, and Alexis says, that’s good news. They look at each other.

Valentin tells Finn, good news. The storm has passed, and the launch is ready. Finn says, it’s great news. As he leaves, he says, sorry again for interrupting. Have a beautiful evening. Outside, he leans against the door for a moment.

Jax says they’re heading out too. Hayden says, they are? Jax says they don’t know if the weather will take another turn, but thanks Nina and Valentin, saying, it was a lovely evening. They’ll have to do it again. They leave, and Nina says, that was a bust. Valentin doesn’t think so. Jax revealed he has an agenda, and they know he and Hayden were looking for something. They just have to figure out what it was. Nina says, not right now, and they kiss.

Tomorrow, Cassandra makes plans for important guests, Kim wants something from Franco, and Shiloh says it’s what he needed to make his day.

🗽 The new season of Million Dollar Listing New York made its premiere tonight. Those crazy brokers – Fredrik, Ryan, and Steve – are still showing me drool-worthy real estate that makes me want to cry, because I will never, ever be able to afford such fabulousity. Nor have I ever. The best I can say about the apartment I had in Manhattan is, it was in Manhattan, and my apartment in Queens was kind of nice. We found out Ryan and Amelia are expecting a girl, and Ryan had to sell an apartment near the BQE – i.e. near a lot of noise. He tried to distract his potential buyers from that by bringing in his own marching band. Steve has a serious girlfriend – who, since filming, has also revealed a pregnancy – and his property cross to bear was in upstate New York, Hudson Valley. It was quite a property too. He got the listing from a billionaire friend, who bought an agricultural complex built in 1902. Now an historic landmark, the friend had intended on turning it into a hotel, but got too busy with other projects. As the current caretaker said, not in live-in condition. It was in total disrepair, a mess, but oh-so-amazing. Fredrik and Derek’s twins were turning one, and he had a dated apartment to unload. He spent a whole bunch of money into throwing an 80s party there, telling us that he loved the 80s because it was extra, like him. Me too. I love the clothes. It was a costume party, so of course he went all out. and created a totally tubular event. The really sad thing was, his client found a buyer of his own, and per the contract, Fredrik was out a commission. $800,000. I hope the deal falls flat, and the client comes crawling back. It hardly seems fair that Fredrik wouldn’t at least get his expenses back, which certainly had to go into the tens of thousands. I have no clue why he wouldn’t have added that in the contract, but maybe he thought it would never happen. God knows his ego is that big. At the end, Luis crashed a party for the twins. He’s back, and charming as ever. It also looks like there’s going to be a new broker in town next time.

🍊 The other program on Bravo’s menu tonight was a rehashed half-hour called The Real Housewives of Orange County: How They Got Here 2019. No new news there, but their new season begins on Tuesday, August 6th, at 9 pm.

💍 Stassi, We Salute You…

After suffering through the dregs of humanity – I’m talking to you, Jax and Patrick – Stassi has finally found her best beau.

The announcement.

With the friends at Villa Rosa.

The ring.

Something extra.

🎧 Been Hearing This Lately…

On a television ad for a phone or something (I don’t really pay attention), and over the end credits of A Simple Favor, which was a direct rip-off of Quentin Tarentino‘s Death Proof end credits. That’s where I first heard it, and I loved it. Tarantino’s soundtracks are always impressive.

July 30, 2019 – A Trick Up Shiloh’s Sleeve, the End Of BH As We Know It, the Feels, No Mama & O-U-T


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Sam, Jason, and Danny go to the park. Sam and Jason talk bikes while Danny plays ball. Sam asks Jason not to buy Danny a bike until he’s twenty.

On the phone, Shiloh says he wants the Job finished today, and to call when it’s done. Danny’s ball rolls near him, and he picks it up. He asks if Danny remembers him.

Kim opens one of Drew’s medals. He says the originals must have been confiscated when he went AWOL. Oscar had them replaced. Oscar’s last gift to him was a piece of his past.

Curtis meets Jordan and Stella at the MetroCourt. He says he only has a minute. He has to do a security walk-through at Aurora. Stella says she’s proud of him. Head of security is impressive, and better than chasing shadows and digging up other people’s secrets.

Peter goes to Lulu’s place. He tells her that he must have dropped his wallet in the couch cushions, and digs around. She says Rocco is at the Quartermaine’s and Charlotte’s father just her. He says he noticed she took a personal day. Is she okay? She says, everything is fabulous. She takes a sip of wine, which she’s obviously been drinking for a while. She says she’s taking Maxie’s advice, grabbing life by… whatever you grab life by, and throwing herself back into the mix.

Valentin tells Obrecht, welcome back to Windymere. She tells him, stop hovering, but he says he’d hate to see her take a tumble over the side. She says she knows the house well. She was holding people hostage there long before he showed up. Nina comes out, and Obrecht thanks her for her concern, but she’s safe in her own home. Valentin says she lives by herself. If anything happens, who knows when, or if, she’ll be discovered. Nina says it’s giving her peace of mind. Obrecht says, it’s not necessary, and they already have a full house with Charlotte and Sasha. Sasha joins them, and Nina tells her to let Obrecht know how roomy the house is. Sasha says they’re going to have even more room when she moves out.

Ryan picks up the phone, and tells Ava, hello darling. Has she missed him as much as he missed her? He saw her Crimson cover. It was evocative. And Midnight in the Garden pf Good and Ava, appropriate imagery. She says he never struck her as the type to follow fashion. He says that’s because she only saw him mimic his brother’s banal sense of style, but he threw in some flair. He has his own aesthetic. She says she noticed. She tells him, as he may have guessed, it’s not a social call. He asks, how can that be? He only ever thinks of her. He laughs, and says there has been something else on his mind. Not so much a who, but a what; his kidney, the one stolen from him. Did she happen to have a hand in that? At first she’s confused, but then the lightbulb comes on, and she says, that would make sense. She wondered why he, of all people, donated an organ, to the Commissioner no less. She thought he was offered a deal, but now he’s telling her that they actually stole it. Those self-righteous hypocrites. No wonder… he holds them in contempt. He tells her that she almost said we. She gets him. No matter how much she thinks she hates him, she knows him, like he knows her. He missed that. She says she hasn’t, and he says, of course not (🍷), but obviously she needs something from him. How can he help?

Stella tells Curtis, that came out wrong. A corporate job must be nice change. He says, it has its advantages; regular hours, a salary, generous benefits, especially while Jordan is recovering. Jordan says it will be better when she’s up to full speed, but Curtis tells her to take her time. Stella says they both deserve a rest, although it must be tame after chasing Ryan. Maybe Curtis will find some corporate espionage to spice things up.

Nina says Sasha promised to stay for the wedding. She can’t move back to Chappaqua now. Sasha says she’s not. She’s finding her own apartment. Between the job and some other things, she’s decided to stay. Nina hugs her, and says she’s so thrilled. When she sees Michael Other Things Corinthos, she’ll have to thank him. Sasha tells her not to say anything, and spare her the embarrassment, but Nina says she never got the chance to show Sasha’s prom date her baby pictures. She has to make up for lost time. Nina asks Obrecht if it isn’t wonderful, but Obrecht says she’s calculating the distance to shore, in case she decides to go swimming for exercise. Valentin asks if she can’t stay out of the water, and she says she’ll be better prepared for sharks this time. Nina says they don’t have them there, but Obrecht says, they’re not necessarily in the water. Nina is excited that her daughter chose to live in Port Charles. Obrecht says she’s brave, considering the crime rate and the low number of convictions. Nina sits between Valentin and Obrecht, and puts her arms around them. She says she has everyone she loves close by. Just the way she likes it. Neither Obrecht nor Valentin look thrilled.

Kim asks if Drew had no idea, and he says he was completely blindsided. She says, it’s pretty spectacular. Drew says he wishes they’d got there in time for Oscar to see them, but Kim says Oscar didn’t need medals for him to think Drew was a hero. She thinks he ordered them so Drew could be as sure as Oscar was that he’s a good man.

Shiloh asks Danny if his mom and dad are around. Jason runs up, and tells Danny to go back to his mom. Danny asks if he’s in trouble, but Jason says, not at all. Shiloh tells Danny to say hi to his mom. Danny runs off, and Shiloh tells Jason he has a lovely little boy despite his efforts to close him off. Jason says, do not approach his family again. Shiloh asks what Jason is going to do; it’s a public place, and Danny is a few feet away. How is he going to explain beating a guy for telling the truth? Jason says Shiloh assaulted Danny’s mother, calling him Hank. He asks if Shiloh wants another beating. He can’t speak if his jaw is wired, and he can’t grope anyone with two broken hands. Like the big baby he is, Shiloh says he’ll tell his lawyer that Jason has been making threats. He leaves, and Danny asks Jason if everything is okay. Jason says, it’s all good.

Kim asks Drew if the medals came with any paperwork, and he tells her the citations are there. She says she’d love to know what he did to earn them, and he gives her the envelope.

Lulu tells Peter, Maxie is right. She has so many amazing things in her life. For instance, her children. She has a kickass job with a kickass boss. She has a byline. People know who she is, and her stories make a difference. He says he knows that; he publishes them. She says she helped to catch a serial killer. She’s so much more than Dante’s wife. She’s Leslie Lou Spencer, and what she is, is remarkable. It’s hard to feel amazing and abandoned, but she’s more remarkable than abandoned. Peter is sure Dante is remarkable too, but from where he’s standing, Dante is an idiot.

Jordan asks Stella what’s going on with her. How’s Marcus? Stella says, same as usual. Very much in love with his wife. He’s in a very complicated, heartbreaking situation, all of which she’s accepted. Jordan says it’s wonderful how they’ve become such great friends, and Stella agrees it’s nice they’re in each other’s lives again. Jordan asks what about her genealogy search. Did she follow up? Stella says, nothing. She took the bait, and gave them money to send the relative a letter about meeting, but they never heard back. Jordan tells her, give it time. Stella says, whoever the mystery relative is, they’ve chosen to stay a mystery. Curtis and Jordan exchange looks, and Stella says they’re doing that thing couples do when they want to work your last nerve. Jordan says she took it upon herself to send the genetic markers to a friend in forensics. Stella asks if she’s related to Billy Dee Williams, and Curtis says, that would be awesome. Jordan says, genetically speaking, it’s a much closer relation than they thought.

Drew tells Kim that he got a medal for saving Shiloh, and she says, Shiloh claims that’s the moment he turned his life around, and embraced the light. Drew says he saved a man who turned out to be a con artist, but Kim says he couldn’t know that then. He says, according to Shiloh, they were best buddies. Kim looks at the paperwork, and says according to this, he rescued a civilian contractor, and went back to rescue SEAL Charles Tex Owens. Maybe he can give Drew information, and shed light on his supposed friendship with Shiloh.

Danny asks, what happened? Did he do something wrong? Jason says he did everything he was asked and didn’t argue. Sam says she’s the one who made a mistake. She should never have introduced Danny to Shiloh. He’s a bad man she was investigating, and should have told him. Danny asks why she didn’t, and she says she didn’t want to confuse him. Jason is pretty sure Shiloh knows not to come near Danny, but if he does, Danny should get them or an adult he trusts. He tells Danny not to be afraid; just be aware. Shiloh won’t hurt him, and if he tries, they’ll stop him.

Ava tells Ryan that she’s working with someone to reach Kiki. Kiki’s spirit can’t find peace. Ryan doesn’t see what that has to do with him, but she says, he killed her. He separated her soul from her body. The least he can do is help her put Kiki’s soul to rest

When they’re alone, Valentin says he owes Sasha an apology. He told her to steer clear of Michael, but now that she’s formed an emotional attachment, it might work in both their favors. She says she’s been trying to tell him that. Nina wants her there, and is happy she’s staying, but he’s the man Nina loves. Charlotte is Nina’s stepdaughter, and they’re a family. Valentin says she’s part of the family now. It’s not how he planned it, but sometimes things work out for the better. Sasha is everything he’d hoped for in a daughter for Nina. He’s happy she’s developed a life of her own that will keep her close by. That leaves just one problem; Obrecht. She asks how he suggest they handle that, and he tells her, leave it to him. He has a few ideas. Outside the door, Obrecht listens.

Jordan explains the DNA comparison between Stella and the mystery relative, showing her the percentage of genetic material they have in common. Stella asks if that makes them cousins, and then asks Curtis why he’s looking at her like that. Curtis says she knows nothing in the past or present could affect how they love and respect her. She says she’s starting to wonder, and he says, if something happened when she was younger, maybe before she lived with them, like perhaps having a child she couldn’t keep, she can tell him.

Stella asks if Curtis has lost his mind. She doesn’t have a secret love child roaming around. He says he didn’t think so, and she asks why he said that. He says, just on the off-chance, he wanted her to know she could tell them. She knows his heart is in the right place, but she’s told him time and again that he and his brother are all the children she needed. This has officially become more trouble than it’s worth. The truth can’t possibly be as crazy as the story they cooked up. Jordan says she’s closely related, but Stella says they have no intention of meeting with her, and she has no need to search the world for a stranger.

Lulu asks Peter what he said about her husband. He’s wonderful and amazing, so are their kids. He’s going through something horrible. Peter says he was there when Dante shot him. He doesn’t think Dante even knew what he was doing. But he doesn’t understand how Dante could walk away from them. She says, he has PTSD. Peter says, he abandoned the family he claims to love. She says he does love them. That’s why he’s making this choice; the most difficult choice of his life. He’s protecting them, knowing he might not return, in order to make her feel safer.

Ava tells Ryan, in death, as in life, Kiki refuses to speak to her. The psychic said Kiki thinks Ryan still has a hold on her, and needs to let her go. he asks, how? and she says the psychic seems think if he apologizes, Kiki will finally be able rest. He says, okay, and she says, so he’ll apologize for taking Kiki’s life, and let her go? He says, of course (🍷). Confession is good for the soul, but it’s not specified which soul. It’s not helping to remind Ava of who she is; a force to be reckoned with. Not some patsy being taken in by a con artist. The dead are dead. There are no souls wandering the earth for resolution. Kiki isn’t restless. Her soul doesn’t exist, and never did. He tells Ava, go home and come back after she gets the help she clearly needs. He hangs up the phone.

Drew and Kim approach Curtis’s table. Stella tells them again that she’s sorry for their loss. Drew thanks her, and tells Curtis the offices are emptied. His team can finish securing the area, and when Curtis is ready. Drop Drew a line when he’s done. He’s sure they’ll be safer.

Danny asks if he can go over his soccer moves, and Sam tells him to stay where they can see him. She asks Jason if he thinks Danny is okay, and Jason says, he seems to be. She doesn’t want him to be afraid that Shiloh is lurking somewhere. Jason thinks Danny trusts them to deal with Shiloh. Now, they just need to figure out how do that.

Shiloh waits. He remembers telling Drew that they could run a sting. Root the bastards out, and trick the sellers. They could split the money, and never see each other again. Returning to the present, he says, where the hell are you?

Ryan picks the phone back up.  Ava says he’s right about one thing; he has no soul. It’s a comfort to know, once he’s gone, he’s gone for good. He’s nothing on the outside, and it matches what’s on the inside. He says, that’s more like it. There’s his Ava. She says whoever stole his kidney shouldn’t have stopped. He should be dead. The knife she plunged in his back should have killed him. He says that’s what he missed so much. Her veracity and passion. It was one of the first things he fell in love with. She says, then let her go. He says, whoever said if you love something, set it free was just making excuses. Why would you want it to go anywhere? That’s not how it works. She says, please, and begs him to let her go, so Kiki can rest in peace.

Lulu asks if Peter is trying reverse psychology on her; pissing her off about Dante so she defends him. Peter says he’s being honest because he cares. Lulu says he thinks he understands, but has no idea. They had issues like everyone else, but the bad was so small and insignificant, it was nothing compared to the good. How good it felt to love each other. That’s why Dante is staying away; he loves them. Peter wonders why he can’t find another way that doesn’t rip the family apart. Lulu says Peter reminds her of herself, passing out advice like she has a clue regarding what she’s talking about. It’s easy to Monday morning quarterback other people. If he had loved anyone before Maxie, maybe he’d understand. He says maybe he is love challenged, and is unfamiliar with the ins and outs, but if it hurts this much, maybe Lulu is better off without Dante. He walks out.

Nina says Obrecht’s room is being prepared. She tells Valentin that Obrecht insisted on the room farthest away from them. Obrecht says why should her snoring bother anyone. Valentin says her generosity in thinking of others is uncharacteristic. Sasha says she has to meet Michael. They’re going away, but she’ll send Nina her contact info. Nina looks at her phone, and says she’s been waiting for this. Obrecht asks if another body has been found, but Nina says it’s the new numbers from Crimson. They’ve exceeded expectations, and are annihilating the competition. She wants to get out the best champagne, and hopes Jax and Hayden choke on it at dinner. Obrecht says, Hayden is coming there tonight? Nina knows Hayden and Obrecht hate each other, and Obrecht accused Hayden of trying to kill her, but this is a super important business dinner. Obrecht says she’d rather eat in the barn, and Nina tells her, just don’t set it on fire this time. Everything is coming together. Crimson is on top, her beautiful daughter has decided to stay in town, and has found love. Sasha says they haven’t said the L-word yet, but Nina says it will happen. And her aunt didn’t drown. Obrecht says Nina needs to raise the bar. Nina says she’s marrying Valentin in September, and it’s going to be the happiest day. There’s nothing to worry about, and nothing to stress them. They can just focus on their happiness. She kisses Valentin, and Sasha says she needs to go. Nina leaves to see about dinner, and Obrecht says, so the wedding is going on as planned? and Valentin says, which begs the question, why would he jeopardize Nina’s happiness by harming Obrecht?

Kim understands why Drew doesn’t want the procedure done – he doesn’t want to risk his relationship with Oscar or Scout – but the medals are a great gateway to his past. Drew says, not just his. Shiloh’s redemption story hinges on Drew saving him. Now there’s another witness to prove he’s a liar.

Stella tells Jordan that she has to get to work. Jordan looks at her, and she says, what now? Jordan says her friend from forensics found something. Stella says she told Jordan to drop it, and she means it. Jordan says Stella might reconsider. Her friend used the same lab that the PCPD uses, and the information suggests Stella’s relation lives in the greater Port Charles area.

Ryan tells Ava that if she really believes the truth will set Kiki free, here it is. He doesn’t regret doing anything, if it meant being by Ava’s side and in her bed. Deep down, he thinks she feels the same way, but she says, not true. He says she consented to everything they did, and she says she consented to Doc. Ryan says she wouldn’t look twice at Doc. She consented to being with him. He suggests she look up the word deception. She tells him to consider taking that back if. He laughs, and tells her, ask herself why he would want her be less haunted by her love for him, than he is for her? She says she hates him, and he says, that’s two sides of… she knows the rest. If the psychic is right, they’re bound together for eternity, and he takes small comfort in that.

Obrecht tells Valentin, stop the petty torment and mind games. She knows he’s the one who tried to kill her. He says, cut the crap. If he wanted her dead, she’d be dead. He has a vested interest in Nina’s happiness. If she’s looking for who pushed her, look at someone else. It’s not him. Not this time.

Jason tells Sam that DOD is practically shut down. Shiloh’s followers are leaving, and his offshore assets are frozen. Sam says the Pledges were destroyed, and Shiloh has been stopped from going near Wiley. Jason thinks Shiloh still has another trick up his sleeve. They’ve just got to figure out what it is.

Curtis goes into Drew’s office, and finds the credenza open and ransacked. He makes a call saying he needs some guys there now.

Someone meets Shiloh, but we don’t see who they are. He asks if they got it. He’s handed the flashdrive, and he says, nice work.

Tomorrow, Alexis wonders how her sex life became a hot topic, Valentin says Cassandra has resurfaced, and Drew tells Shiloh that he’s going to find out what happened in Afghanistan.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – The Reunion – Part Three

Almost done with The Real Housewives of Self-Righteous Hypocrisy.

Backtracking a little, Camille says Denise told her to tell her daughter that she’s an effing liar in regard to Teddi’s snub. Denise says Camille needs to take a second. Because this is not good. Andy asks what was going through Denise’s mind at lunch, when Camille trash talked everyone. Denise starts saying she was uncomfortable, and Camille gets up. She says, it’s a set-up, and leaves, taking off her dress as she goes. Denise asks if she’s on something. She’s so angry. Backstage, Camille calls them nasty bitches, and Denise says, she’s effing nuts. Denise never said that.

Andy goes backstage, and Camille says, that’s it. She’s done. Andy asks, what set-up? and she says Denise did say she cursed at her kids. We view some unseen footage that backs up what Camille is saying. On stage, Denise says she never told Camille to tell her daughter that she’s a liar. Erika says she’s speechless, and she’s rarely speechless. LisaR says Camille didn’t want them at her wedding. We go back to last week, where Camille said it was just for production. Camille tells Andy that they were nasty about her wedding, but Andy says, they thought it was great. Camille points out that Teddi claimed the best part of her wedding was leaving. We see a clip from the Watch What Happens Live aftershow where Teddi says just that.

Kyle says, Camille was so mean, and LisaR says, no one ever said they didn’t want her somewhere. I find that hard to believe. Camille tells Andy that they want her to jump on the LVP hate train. She understands how they feel, but she still misses LVP. Can’t she say something nice about LVP without them jumping on her? She feels ganged up on because she didn’t gang up on LVP. Kyle says Camille isn’t being genuine, and Andy tells Camille that he thinks they feel she says one thing to them, and another behind their backs. Camille says, they all talk about each other. Andy thinks if she was consistent, there would be no issue. Camille doesn’t know what issue Denise has with her, and Andy says Camille just said she didn’t like Denise. LisaR says Camille is much angrier than she realized. Andy asks Camille to come back for more torture.

Andy goes back, and tells the women that Camille feels they want her to talk sh*t about LVP. He told her they wanted her to be consistent, but she’s upset because they trashed her wedding on the aftershow. Kyle says, it’s Camille on season one times ten. Camille returns, and Kyle says, it’s so awkward, but LisaR says they’re glad Camille came back. Andy asks why Camille is crying, because either he’s a total idiot or wants to make her cry harder. She says it’s been hard for her to talk to them. She was very hurt after the wedding. LisaR asks if she’s okay, and if there’s something more going on. Camille says she was really hurt, and LisaR says, it was a great wedding. Camille reminds Teddi that she said the best part was the departure. It broke her heart. She thought they had fun. Teddi says they did enjoy it, and they being shady. They’d heard terrible things that Camille said. She didn’t know Camille was mad during the camping trip. She never said anything. Camille says she was just mad in that moment, but Teddi says she didn’t just talk about it once. Camille says she’s had a lot going on. She doesn’t even remember everything that happened specifically.

On top of the large volume of flashbacks, they also keep overlapping when we come back from a commercial break. Did they seriously not have enough material without LVP? Kyle tells Camille that she said she didn’t want to invite them to her wedding. She’s feeling hurt, and it’s confusing. Camille says she’s confused too. Kyle says she knows Camille is a good person; just be honest. She knows it’s hard sometimes. It was hard for her go to LVP and be honest. Andy says Camille made serious claims about Dorit’s financial status, but said she was protecting her. Camille says she didn’t want to say anything, and Dorit says, but she did. We flash back to that, and Erika says, it was a thinly veiled threat; I know something about you. Camille says, it was irresponsible, hurtful, and mean. She realized after she said it, and felt horrible. Dorit says she’ll always have shadow of doubt, and can’t trust what Camille says is real. Andy tells Camille that she said she doesn’t care for Denise. Was there something specific? Camille says she didn’t like what Denise said about her daughter lying. Denise insists she told Camille to reassure her daughter, and tell her Teddi was just in a hurry. She doesn’t think she would say anything like that, but if she did, she’s sorry.

Andy brings up the controversial conversation about Brett Kavanaugh, and how it took a personal turn. We flash back to that, and he asks if Camille feels misunderstood about what she said. Camille says she feels people need be heard and believed. LisaR says she thinks having the conversation was a good thing. She thinks it’s important that victims be believed; her mom is one. She’s a survivor, and so is Camille. Erika is a survivor. Erika says Camille is a survivor of a lot of things. Andy asks what it was like for Camille, walking through the embers of her house. She says they were lucky to salvage some stuff, like baby pictures. She starts to cry as we flash back. Andy says he can’t imagine, and everyone says they’re sorry. Erika says but Camille does have the ability to rebuild. Thank God she’s safe, and she’s got the kids. Camille says she lost Scott too; her assistant and confidant is gone. Andy says it struck him when she said she lost her house, but losing a friend is more difficult.

Andy says Denise had to run out of the house at a moment’s notice. Her house was okay, but all of their belongings had smoke damage. Denise says every piece of clothing, but it’s stuff. For her it was her kids and her dogs. It was moving so fast, and they had to get out. Andy says it’s nice that the other women brought them clothes. Camille says, it was very kind. Andy stirs the pot by reminding Camille that she said Denise doesn’t understand the heartache. Her rented house didn’t burn down. Denise doesn’t know the reason. She thinks they’ve been empathetic. She and Camille talked several times. Who gives sh*t if she was renting? They’ve been figuring out where to live, and she wondered where this was coming from; what did she do to Camille that Camille thinks she’s not empathetic? Camille doesn’t know; she has no answer. She’s sorry. Denise says, this is where we think before we speak, making me want to smack her, even if I agree. She says Camille said some extremely hurtful things that had no truth to them. She’s talking out of her ass. Denise says she’s been nothing but nice, kind, and supportive. Camille says she’s had a difficult year. She doesn’t have a home; her family has been displaced; and her mom is very sick. She’s overwhelmed. LisaR comes over, and sits next to Camille, putting an arm around her. Camille says she was nervous to come. Denise wonders if she needs to take a minute, but Camille says she’ll be okay. LisaR says she’s been through a lot. Andy asks if she regrets being so open in her opinions. Camille says she’s been wrong, and she’s sorry if she’s been cruel. Andy suggests they take a break, and air the room out.

Andy says the jet setting housewives took their wanderlust to the next level. We flash back to their Bahamas trip, France, and camping. A viewer says Kyle having a Rolex postmated to the dinner table was the diva behavior to which she aspires. Andy asks if she needs Mauricio’s permission to make a purchase. Kyle says, first of all, she had the watch delivered that was because the shop was going to be closed, and for a big purchase, she checks with Mauricio, and he does the same. Erika says she doesn’t buy her own jewelry because Tom likes to do it. Dorit says, anything over $10K. Oh yeah. For me too. Andy asks how much Camille’s wedding cost, and she says, $120K. Her first wedding was closer to a million, but a lot was spent on security. A viewer can’t believe the spent $700 on groceries for one night when they went camping. Andy asks what happened to the leftovers, and Teddi says they donated them to the other campers. Everyone talks about how often they personally grocery shop, which is more than you’d think, but I would too. He asks what LisaR had packed in her bag, and she says, everything. We flash back to Erika asking, what’s in the bag? A dead body? Vanderpump? Erika says LisaR is their resident pharmacy – in a good way. Andy says people were surprised they were without a glam squad in Provence. Erika says they were fine; they’re capable. He asks when Kyle was more hammered, clubbing or the wine tasting, and she says, Provence. We flash back to her helping Teddi up the stairs. Erika doesn’t know how they were still walking upright. Kyle says they also had extreme jet lag. In nine years, it was the most she’d consumed, and the worst it’s gotten. Andy tells her, that’s saying something.

And in the moment we all knew was coming, we flash back to Puppygate and the Radar Online article. Dorit says it was no longer about the dog, but about her friendship with LVP. We see Kyle’s involvement, and her wondering how she was going to say LVP had nothing to do with it, when she’d been accused of it before. We go way back to the reunion where Adrienne said LVP had leaked a story. We see the beginning of LVP’s argument with Kyle, and LVP asking Camille if she’ll have to take a lie detector test. Andy says a practicing attorney told them the test was 70% accurate, and not admissible in court. Erika says, Tom weighed in, and said they were unreliable, but can be good if the right person [administers] them. Dorit is also suddenly a font of information about the tests. Denise wonders how LVP found it. Andy says he’s skeptical about how Kyle found out, and asks if she’s sure production didn’t tell her about it. Kyle says the family of one of her daughter’s friends was burglarized, and they had the construction workers take one. Andy asks why she’d dispute it’s validity, and Kyle says they’ve used it with workers, and someone failed who she knew didn’t do it. I’m wondering how she knows that for sure, but okay. I’m also guessing the test would be more likely to err in this direction if the person was super nervous. Kyle says the friend said the lady with the dog was there. LVP did a practice run, then had production film it. Andy asks why they think LVP had a trial run, and Kyle says, to see if she passed. Erika says, so when the cameras showed up, she gave a great performance. Andy tells them the boss at Radar said LVP wasn’t the source, and has never been an anonymous source. Kyle says someone in that position wouldn’t normally make statements unless they’re a friend. She doesn’t think Radar is losing sleep over whether LVP leaked a story or not. Camille asks if Denise thinks it could be someone from the center. Denise says, maybe. LisaR says LVP isn’t stupid enough to make the call herself. She’d have someone else do it. She says LVP talks through the press. That’s how she announced she was leaving the show.  Andy talks about LVP’s digs at them via social media. Kyle says they’ve been accused of bullying LVP, but haven’t stooped that low. We see a clip of LVP joking about Erika tucking, and the mini backlash that followed it. It’s pointed out by a viewer that Erika talks about her d*ck on the show, so what’s the difference? Erika says LVP was taking a swipe at her and being funny, but hurt a viable community. I love how it’s always someone who isn’t a member of a viable community, uses that for their own agenda. Andy says, considering LVP’s brother had committed suicide, viewers felt it was a pile-on when LVP wasn’t in the best state of mind. We flash back to one of the few times we’ve seen LVP cry. Kyle says they all have empathy, and Dorit says they spoke a lot, almost every day. LisaR doesn’t think they were mean girls or they bullied LVP. Kyle says LVP’s Behavior wasn’t a new thing. Andy tells them LVP said she wasn’t watching the show. Teddi says, when you’re surrounded by people who tell you what you want to hear, you lose the ability for self-reflection.

Andy says LVP and Kyle’s rollercoaster of a relationship came to the end of its run. We flash back to their friendship, and LVP saying they’re partners in crime, and end with that miserable fight, which I’d love to never see again. Kyle cries, and says, it’s sad. It’s sad LVP isn’t there. She paid the ultimate price by being honest. She has thought about how it might have played out if she hadn’t told LVP. Dorit says, it’s a sad end. Andy asks what the prediction is for the future. Kyle says she had thought LVP would show up. Camille cries too. Andy says he hates to see it. Since he’s so choked up, without even missing a beat, he says, Ken’s infamous farewell went viral with the #GoodbyeKyle challenge. We see clips of various people saying, goodbye, Kyle, Harry Hamlin and Kris Jenner among them. Andy asks what the intention was, and Kyle says she was being trolled on Twitter, and people were using the hashtag. Instead of taking it, she decided to make a joke out of it. She says it’s another example of LVP making her look bad. Her sister Kathy was at their house, and even though LVP acted wounded, they were laughing about it. She thinks LVP thought it was funny. She says LVP has amazing qualities, and you take the good with the bad with friends. Andy says he’ll leave it there. He thanks Camille, who says it was heart wrenching. She had a lot of emotions going on, and she’s sorry if she hurt anyone. She adds that she adores Kyle, and they hug. LisaR gives Camille kudos for showing up.

Andy says in the final moments, he wonders what the most surprising revelation was for the newest Housewife. Denise says the friendships between the women. Also the friendships she formed. She knows they’d be there for her, and vice versa. In LA, that’s something wonderful to have. Andy says that in an interview, Erika says she allowed herself form a sisterhood, something she hadn’t had before.  Does she think she’s changed? Erika thinks they’ve all changed. Dorit says her friendships were challenged, and Andy asks if she feels secure. She says she does in this group, throwing one last dig at LVP.  Andy asks if Teddi still feels pressured to be the moral compass for her friends. Teddi says she’s learned a lot, about her friends and herself. It was a good wake-up call. Andy reminds LisaR that last season, she was the nicest effing version of LisaR. What about this season. She asks what he says, and he tells her that he’d say she’s just an a-hole with iconic hair and lips, which I assume is referring to some earlier joke. Or Andy is being totally rude. LisaR says she thinks she was forthcoming. He says for Kyle, the season ended a long friendship with LVP. How else does she want it to be remembered? She says she’s been asked a lot how she can still be doing the show, but she has fun with the women. Even though a door closed, she doesn’t know what the future holds. They’ve all bonded, and opened up. They’ve shared more than they ever have, and she laughed so much. Andy begs to open LVP’s birthday present, and Kyle says okay, but he has to put the bow back on. It’s from Manolo Blahnik. Andy takes out a pink belt with a sparkly buckle. Teddi suggests he wants for the clubhouse, but Kyle says she’s sending it. She thought she was going to give it to LVP today.

Tequila shots appear, and Andy says they’re well-earned. They’ve been troopers. It was a wild season, but he’s glad they got closure. It was a nice way to end it. He asks who’s going to lead them in a toast, and Denise says, Queen Kyle. Kyle says, to friendships, and being honest with each other, and being there for each other, and continuing to grow in their friendships. Dorit says she’s grateful for them, and everyone clinks glasses. Andy thanks them for a great season.

🍸 My Own Wrap-Up…

I’m sad that I’m glad this is over. I remember thinking during the first episode of the entire franchise, The Real Housewives of Orange County, that this was the future of television. There had been reality TV before. While most of us don’t remember the Loud family – stars of An American Family on PBS in the early 70s – although their show has been rerun from time to time. I spent one New Year’s Day hungover and fascinated with it. Probably the most popular up until now is The Real World, which was actually a good show before it became the hot-tub-drunk-sex show. People had lives and jobs and meaningful interactions, both with their housemates and people on the outside. But for some reason, when the Housewives began, the world was ready for a change in programming, and here we are.

I’ve never missed an episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. While I’ve let some Wives fall by the wayside – looking at you, Atlanta and Potomac – and there were others I struggled to find – The Real Housewives of Sydney, anyone? – I’ve stuck with these women through thick and thin. There has been no season, however, that made me want to stop watching until now.

I’ve joked that if LVP would adopt an older child, I’d be on her doorstep in a heartbeat, and said she can do no wrong, but I’m not daft. She doesn’t walk on water, and we all have faults. But the relentless raking her over the coals was insane. They even talked about her throughout most of the reunion, which I might add, must have been lacking in material since a good 40% of it was flashbacks. With another 40% given to talking about LVP, it didn’t leave much. Maybe because there isn’t much to leave.

In a year where her brother committed suicide, her mother died (albeit after filming), several of her dogs went to the Bridge, Giggy was diagnosed with a heart condition, she opened three restaurants, and nearly single-handedly brought attention to the dog meat trade, these women decided to make LVP a target because she may or may not have pointed out the obvious. Dorit did an effing stupid and thoughtless thing, disregarding a dog adoption contract because she wanted to circumvent the rules. Maybe she didn’t want to face LVP, maybe it was just inconvenient, but in giving the dog to what she thought was a new, loving home, it ended up in a shelter. Dorit was wrong. Period. Camille was the only one to point this out, but since she was Enemy Number Two, no one listened.

I don’t believe LVP leaked the story, but that’s not to say it didn’t come from her staff at Vanderpump Dogs, or that she didn’t turn a blind eye. The really stupid thing is, anyone who cares would have ended up knowing anyway, because, the show. So in the long run, the whole thing was immaterial. Dorit wailed over the backlash, to which I say, don’t do something stupid in the first place, and after that, nothing LVP could have done would have been enough to convince them she wasn’t lying. Even a lie detector test was found fault with. Yes, I’m completely aware they’re inadmissible in court, but passing one while still being guilty is pretty difficult. Ain’t nobody got time for that, least of all LVP. When Kyle flat-out said she didn’t believe LVP, the friendship was done, and LVP was done with the show.

The whole thing was depressing, and I don’t think any of them came out looking good. Regardless of how much of a hand LVP did or did not have to do with the Radar story, she didn’t deserve the persistent sniping and continual jabs throughout the season, especially after the year she had. Even Brandi was dragged in for her nasty two cents. It was a huge disappointment to me that she’s good friends with Denise Richards, who I’ve liked up until now. I still like her, but I think she came in knowing nothing, and probably still doesn’t. I, too, believe even a hooker deserves Thanksgiving dinner, but I’m not going out for drinks with her, and listen to her opinions about LVP. (That was a joke. I’m sure the hooker was much more of a lady than Brandi.) I think Denise likes to take in strays, and I’m not just referring to dogs and cats. The worst part was how no one could understand why LVP no longer wanted to be friends with Kyle, when Kyle said she believed LVP was lying. They didn’t seem to get that, from that time forward, LVP would be wondering if Kyle believed anything she said. So what would be the point of a friendship? LisaR also got the nasty consolation prize, for giving Kim the finger and calling her a c-word while dressed as Erika Jayne, and using that as an excuse. And I don’t even particularly like Kim.

I also found it creepy how the group passed LVP’s symbolic crown to Kyle, making her queen of the group. She pretended to be all humble, but I’m pretty sure, deep down, she was pleased. While I’m curious who will have the bullseye on their back next season, I’ll have to read about it in someone else’s recap. If I even do that.

🎼 No. Just No…

LuAnn as Mama Morton? Here’s the scoop on the Countess being in Chicago on Broadway. As I thought, not quite. And I’ll bet she needs more rehearsals and coaching. She’d possibly need someone singing in her ear.

🐶 Working Double Dog Duty…

While my partner in pup care works overtime. So the answer to this question is, me.

July 29, 2019 – Shiloh Crashes a Party, Two Time Winner Aboard, Returning Listings, Birthday Surprise, Sneezy, Lots Of Wives, Honeymoon Over, MJ Update, No Charm & New Month


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Franco and Drew have lunch in Drew’s office. Franco says, it’s a little out there, but a psychic at the reception told him that he may not be feeling himself soon. To make it weirder, Ava is trying to communicate with Kiki somehow, and he saw another psychic at the hospital. She told him, whatever you do don’t take that drive. He asks what Drew thinks.

Ava asks if Chelsea would like to sit. Chelsea says they can talk about the article in Crimson, but Ava says that’s another way Sibley failed her. She could have warned Ava that she was walking into a hatchet job. Chelsea doesn’t think it was a hatchet job. It was honest, and didn’t take a side. Ava told her story in her own words. Some readers approved, some didn’t. Such is pleasing the public. Ava says she wasn’t trying to please anyone. She did it to make amends with Kiki, hoping Kiki would maybe forgive her.

Willow goes to Charlie’s to find Julian. She says Michael mentioned that today is Wiley’s birthday, but he’s at work. Julian says he didn’t think he’d be invited. Willow says she’s the reason, and she’d like to change that.

At the hospital, Shiloh approaches Epiphany at the reception desk. He says he called about getting a copy of his medical records, and she asks if he filled out a request form online. He tells her, no, and she says he needs to fill one out in person then. She can’t release them without a request form. She gives him the paperwork. Bobbie comes by, and tells Epiphany that she got her shift covered. Epiphany tells her to have fun at Wiley’s birthday party. Bobbie says, Lucas already left for the MetroCourt, and she doesn’t want to keep the guest of honor waiting. Shiloh listens.

Carly says she’s glad Sasha could be there, and Sasha thinks her for being included. She asks if she can help, but Carly says, no. Just be patient with the family. She promises they mean well. Alexis arrives, followed by Brad and Lucas with Wiley. Brad says Wiley is ready to party, and so are they. Lucas says Wiley has made them the happiest guys on the planet.

Michael tells Nelle that he didn’t come there to talk about them; he came talk about their son. Nelle says that’s what she means. She called him for a different reason, but now it’s all about their son. She knows something he doesn’t about what really happened to Jonah.

Julian tells Willow that he’s tried to keep his distance. Willow says, at the time, she didn’t know he’d put his past aside. She’s seen how people can change. Her mother changed, and she changed when she left DOD. She’d like to clear the way for him to be part of Wiley’s life. She thinks Wiley needs a grandfather like him.

Epiphany tells Shiloh, his medical records are being prepared now. He asks if there’s any way to expedite that. He has somewhere to be. She says, it’s a hospital, not a fast food counter. Paperwork comes second to patient care. She suggests he take a seat.

Bobbie says it’s Wiley’s birthday and gotcha day; the day he was adopted. Carly tells Sasha that the days were so close, they decided to celebrate them together. Brad asks Lucas if everything is okay, and Lucas tells him that Willow has changed her mind about Julian seeing Wiley. Brad says it’s fine with him, but he supposes it’s up to Lucas. Carly introduces Sasha to Bobbie, who says, oh, Michael’s girlfriend. Sasha says, they’re really just… but Bobbie says, nonsense. She asks if Wiley isn’t incredible, and Sasha says, he’s a charmer. She asks if Sasha wants to hold him, and Carly takes a picture of Sasha holding Wiley.

Nelle tells Michael, the night their son was born, she gave birth alone in the woods. She was in deep despair, literally out of her mind. She asks him to please try and understand. His phone dings, and he sees it’s a message from Carly. Nelle asks if Carly knows he’s there. Does she want him to come home and forget about her? He says, it doesn’t matter, but she tells him to open it. He does, and sees the picture of Sasha and Wiley. The text says, look who’s stealing your godson. Michael explains that Wiley is Lucas and Brad’s son, and his godson. She asks if Sasha is his girlfriend, and he says they’re seeing each other. That’s all he’s saying. What does she know about Jonah that he doesn’t?

Julian says he can’t thank Willow enough. She says she’s happy to do it. He says, ironically, he has Wiley’s birthday gift there. He was going to send it by messenger, but now they can take it together. He goes in the back, and Willow gets a message from Lucas, who hopes she can come to Wiley’s big day.

Franco asks what Drew thinks the psychic meant. Does he think it has something to do with the car Oscar left to Cameron? Drew says he had it checked bumper to bumper; it’s the safest car on the road. Franco says clearly, it’s bothering him. He didn’t want to saddle Elizabeth with it, and since Drew has nothing better to do than listen to him… He tells himself to stop babbling, and Drew asks Franco to do him a favor. Stop worrying. The psychic probably wants him to be curious so he’ll pay for a consultation. Drew tells him to enjoy his new life with Elizabeth. Franco says, that’s what’s bothering him; he’s happy. He’s happier than he’s ever been, and now he has something to lose. They both know how easy it is to lose things in this life. Drew tells him don’t do that to himself. Don’t rob himself of joy worrying about what he can’t see coming. Drew’s assistant brings in a package for him from the Department of the Navy.

As they walk, Ava asks Chelsea why they’re in the park. Does she hope to reach Kiki there? Chelsea says it’s a spot Kiki enjoyed. Ava says, Kiki loved it; she loved running there. She especially liked when the sunflowers were in bloom. They reminded her aliens visiting for a while. She had a quirky sense of humor. She was sweet, but not a pushover. She was so beautiful. Chelsea says, like her mother. It’s remarkable considering the fire she went through. Her surgeon must be in great demand. Ava tells her, the less said about the fire, the better. The only good thing was that Kiki forgave her. Chelsea says, for tampering with Morgan’s medication? and Ava says she’s not paying Chelsea to judge her. Chelsea says she’s not judging; she’s stating facts. Ava entered Morgan’s room under false pretenses, and switched his lithium with a placebo. It’s just like how she shot Connie. Ava says Chelsea is dredging up things best left forgotten. Why doesn’t she contact Ava’s daughter?

Nelle says she sees Michael has moved on from the loss of their son. Michael says he thinks of Jonah every day, and she asks if he dreams about Jonah every night. She does. He says he’s supposed to be at a party, but came there to honor Jonah’s memory. Whatever she has to say, say it now, or he’s leaving. She says she wanted to tell him about a dream she had. It was so real. Jonah was surrounded by angels. They were singing to him, and he was smiling. He was at peace, and so beautiful. She wanted to share it with Michael. Michael says they’re never going to see each other again after this. He calls for the guard, saying he’s done. He leaves, and Nelle cries a little. She says, this is not goodbye. She’s not done with him or their baby.

Sasha tells Lucas that his son is a charmer. Lucas says they like to think so. Bobbie asks Carly if Michael and Sasha are serious, and Carly says, we’ll see. She asks if Bobbie can have champagne, and Bobbie says, a little. It’s a special occasion in more ways than one. It’s the first time Carly has liked, or even approved, of Michael’s girlfriend. Carly says she likes Sasha, and the contrast is like night and day. Michael seems light and happy. She adds, until today. Nelle called, and Michael is on his way to see her.

Alexis tells Brad and Lucas that she has no idea how Shiloh made bail, but it doesn’t change anything regarding Wiley. Shiloh is banned from making any claim in family court until his criminal charges are adjudicated. Brad can’t wait, and Lucas says, today is about Wiley and family. Julian comes in with Willow, and Carly asks what the hell he’s doing there. Lucas says Willow gave him permission, and Brad says he’s been a lifesaver. Willow says she’ll contact Diane and make it official. Bobbie says, anything for her grandson.

Drew asks his assistant if she has any idea what this is about. She says Oscar wanted him to have his military medals. He filled out the paperwork, and she got Drew to sign it. He thought he was signing a contract. He says his son co-opted her into getting his signature without his knowledge? She says it was back in February, and asks if she’s getting fired. Drew says she’s getting a raise and an extra week’s vacation. She asks if that means they’re okay, and he says they’re great. After she leaves, he says, that kid. Franco says, Oscar probably went to a lot of trouble. Drew should take a look.

Drew opens the box, and it’s filled with jewelry-type boxes. He opens one, and says, the Silver Star. Franco says, wow, and asks if he can open the envelope that came with it. Drew tells him, go ahead, and Franco reads that it’s from the Secretary of the Navy for his gallantry in actions against the enemy. Some of it is redacted, but Drew saved lives, and whatever he did was impressive. He should check them out. Drew wonders what made Oscar want to request them. Franco says Oscar was curious about Drew’s past. Maybe he thought these would help explain it. Or maybe he was proud of his old man, and wanted Drew to have them. And he should. He earned them. Drew just wishes Oscar could see them.

Carly asks if they’re ready to toast the birthday boy. Michael runs in, telling Sasha that he’s sorry he’s late. Sasha tells him, don’t apologize. It’s been great, and his godson is darling. Michael says, Wiley definitely has a way of bringing people together. Lucas toasts to their son, Wiley. He’s only been in the world a year, but his impact on the family is immeasurable. Shiloh strolls in (I’m sure we all saw that coming), and says sorry he’s late. He says his invitation must have gotten lost in the mail, and out-smirks himself.

Ava asks Chelsea, please contact Kiki, and ask what she thinks of the article. Chelsea says she can’t do it on demand, but Ava begs her to try. She’s got to reach Kiki one way or another. Chelsea looks into the distance, and says, my goodness. It’s the Coachella of dead people. It’s a crowded field. Connie is there, and someone named AJ. Ava says she doesn’t want to hear from them; she wants to hear from her daughter. Chelsea says, there’s a very elegant women named Helena who has a message. Ava says, she’s Nikolas’s grandmother. Chelsea says, Helena claims Ava knew Nikolas killed her, but didn’t tell anyone. Ava says she didn’t bring Chelsea there to contact Helena. Where’s Kiki? Chelsea says, sorry. She hears an infant crying. Ava says she didn’t kill a baby, and Chelsea says, so she knows nothing about a dead baby boy and his mother?

Carly tells Shiloh, it’s her hotel; get the hell out before she calls security. He says, no one is looking for a physical confrontation, and it would only upset Wiley. Willow tells him, get out, but he says he only wanted to wish love and light to their baby boy. She says he’s nothing to Wiley. Shiloh says he should have known when he saw Wiley’s smile; it’s her smile. Wiley is the miracle they created. Michael tells him, leave now, but Shiloh says not until he gives his son a present, reminding me of Maleficent in Sleeping Beauty.

Franco tells Drew, in 2012 he saved a civilian contractor. He should let them know, so they can send him a fruitcake every Christmas. Drew says, he already knows. He goes by the name of Shiloh.

Shiloh says they can’t object to a gift, but Lucas says they don’t need or want anything from him. Shiloh says it’s important that Wiley has the medical records of his biological parents. Lucas says they already know about the heart condition, and Brad takes the envelope from Shiloh, hustling Lucas away. Alexis tells Shiloh not to make a scene or she’ll have his bail revoked. Brad tells Shiloh, just stop, but Shiloh says Wiley is his son, forever and always, and one day, Wiley will be his. Michael asks Sasha to call for the elevator. Shiloh says they can’t force him to leave. I’d like to know how he figures that, since it’s a private party, but Michael says he wouldn’t dream of it. The elevator doors open, and Michael gives Shiloh the bum’s rush into it. Everyone is like, wow, and Michael suggests they get back to the celebration, and what’s important; Wiley’s birthday. Wiley smiles like he knows what just happened.

Harmony ask Nelle how the visit with her baby’s father was, and Nelle says, disappointing. Harmony says she’s sorry, and Nelle says, her too. She was going to tell him something important that would have changed everything. Instead, she realized he doesn’t deserve to know. Harmony thought Nell had said she still loved him, and his mother was responsible for sabotaging the relationship. Nelle says, she did, but he let her. He didn’t need to, and could have fought for them. He could have committed himself to them, but he let his mother ruin it, and convince him that she was trash. He’s as much blame as Carly is. He doesn’t deserve their son.

Ava tells Chelsea that she had nothing to do with the death of Nelle’s baby; they were in a car accident. Chelsea says it’s something to do with a baby blanket; yellow and green. Ava says she can see that? and Chelsea says there’s no telling what pops up. She senses a hidden secret. Ava is a magnet for restless souls and psychic turbulence. Ava asks where Kiki is. She must be seeking closure. Make her listen. Chelsea says she can’t make Kiki do anything, and Ava asks if she can locate Kiki. Chelsea says, she’s there. Ava wishes she could see her, and asks what she’s doing. Chelsea says she’s refusing to come any closer. Ava says she’s so sorry. She loves Kiki so much, and wants them to have closure. Not just for her, but for Kiki, so she can rest in peace. She asks if Kiki understands, but Chelsea says, no; sorry.

Drew thinks he should send that medal back, but Franco says, who knew Shiloh would come back to the US and start a cult? Drew says, to hear Shiloh tell it, they were best buddies, but it doesn’t sit right with him. How could he be friends with someone he doesn’t trust? All the times Shiloh was fishing around, hoping Drew would remember, or hoping he didn’t. He may or may not remember Shiloh is a total sleazeball, or know something that might have legal ramifications. He’s been trying to get Drew to open up and find out what Drew knows to reassure himself. The gap in his memory is one thing, explaining it to his son was another. Shiloh convinced Oscar that he and Drew were friends. So much so, Oscar left his ELQ shares to Shiloh. Fortunately, he made a second bequest to use them to endow a foundation for deserving children to climb Mr. Kilimanjaro. Franco says, it sounds more like Oscar wanted to neutralize Shiloh’s claim, so he had no leverage. Drew wishes he knew what happened.

Shiloh meets with a lawyer, who tells him that she’s been assigned as his public defender. He’s entitled to a defense. Shiloh says, even if he’s broke? He has no home, and his accounts have been frozen. She says he still has the right to an attorney. The charges are formidable. It’s her job to handle that, and they have a lot of work to do. The evidence is extensive. Multiple women have come forward, saying he drugged and assaulted them at the DOD house here, and in Beecher’s Corners. He says, those poor, deluded women. She says there’s also a prescription for whatever that drug is, under his name. (I keep trying to figure it out. I thought she said carfentanil, but that’s illegal in the US). Harmony also confessed her complicity in drugging the women. She produced concrete evidence of fraud and blackmail with personal, privileged information about his followers that was used as leverage. He asks if it isn’t her job to discredit that, but she tells him to be realistic and assess the situation. He’s not going to beat the charges. He says, so that’s it? She’s not even trying? She tells him, she’s saying he has a choice. He can go to trial, be convicted, and spend the rest of his life in prison, or take a plea. Twenty years, and he’ll be out in fourteen. The only question is how long he wants to stay in prison. Twenty years is a gift. Take the plea, or spend his life behind bars.

Alexis says, at least they have Shiloh’s medical records, but Lucas says they already knew about the heart condition. It probably came from Shiloh. Brad tells Julian that Lucas can’t see the records, but Julian says, he’s a doctor and will eventually. Michael tells Lucas that his trip to Pentonville wasn’t a total waste. Nelle is manipulative as ever, and the next time she calls, he’s refusing the charge. Lucas is glad Willow came, but Brad says he’s sorry she had to witness Shiloh. She says she also witnessed how the family stepped up to protect Wiley. Lucas says she’s at the top of that list. She trusted them to have Wiley in the first place, and then continued to protect him. Being thrown jail was heroic. She says, all that matters is Wiley is safe now. Lucas says they’d love for her to be part of Wiley’s life, and Brad adds, if she’d like to be. Willow says she would, more than anything. Sasha tells Michael that Wiley is one lucky baby with him as a godfather. Michael says he loves Wiley like his own.

Ava asks Chelsea, if Kiki won’t forgive her, even after the article, is there anything else she can do? Chelsea says, Kiki seems to think so. Ava says she’ll do anything. Chelsea says Ava is a truly haunted soul. The afterlife clings to her like cat hair on a black suit. Kiki is angry that Ava fell in love with a serial killer. He won her over by validating her worst impulses. Kiki hates that Ava gave him her soul when he doesn’t have one. She was so desperate for attention and admiration, Ava was blinded to the danger. Ava says she knows that, but how can she fix it now? Chelsea says Ryan has no soul, but he still has a heart, and it belongs to Ava. Ava asks what the hell that means, but Chelsea says she’s just the messenger. Suddenly, Ava says, oh my God. She has to go, and runs out of the park.

Shiloh tells the lawyer that he needs time to consider his options. She says, it’s not difficult. Twenty years or forever. He says not if he’s a ghost, but she tells him, don’t think of trying to run. He says he’s not running. His son lives there, and he has the utmost faith that everything will work out the way it’s supposed to. He’ll get back to her. She says he has her number. She leaves, and he says, resources. He flashes back to Drew telling him not to take it personally, and asking Drew if there’s any chance his memory might return. Again, he says, resources.

Wiley unwraps presents wrapped in very LOUD wrapping paper. Lucas tells Brad that their son is opening presents. He doesn’t want to miss any of this day. Everyone gets excited over a toy car.

Nelle tells Harmony it’s too late for her to undo what’s done. She needs to think about what to do. She says Harmony needs to keep Shiloh away. Do anything she can to affect the outcome. Harmony says she’s fully cooperated with the prosecution, and she’s going to testify. Nelle asks if Harmony is sure the prosecution has enough evidence. Harmony thinks so. Shiloh has run out of people to do him favors. Nelle hopes she’s right. Whatever it takes, it’s worth it to keep the baby safe.

Ava waits in the prison visiting area. Ryan sits down on the other side of the glass. I gotta say, the Miami Vice unshaven look suits him.

Franco asks Drew if he didn’t say there was a procedure to help recover his memories, but he decided not to pursue it. Drew says nothing is more important than his memories of Oscar and Scout. He’d never jeopardize that. His memories are on a flashdrive, safe and sound in his office, and that’s where they’re staying. Drew looks at his credenza.

Shiloh wanders around outside, and finds a dollar. He remembers Drew saying that there’s supposedly a procedure that could possibly undo what’s been done. Shiloh makes a call. He says he’s glad they picked up. He was afraid they’d duck his call. It’s been a while. He says he’s got a job for them.

Tomorrow, Jordan tells Stella that the mystery relative is closer than they realized, Sasha asks Valentin how he proposes they handle Obrecht, Jason tells Shiloh not to approach his family again, and Ryan asks Ava how he can help her.

Below Deck Mediterranean

When we last left, new stew June had left the table during the crew’s night out to get sick in the bathroom. Hannah asks if she’s crying, but Anastasia says, no. In June’s interview, she says she doesn’t care what anyone thinks of her personal life, but it’s no one’s business. Colin says he’s been in her shoes, and it can be intimidating. June returns to the table, and asks where they’re going next. They head out to a club. Jack suggests he and Travis not party too hard, since their big double date is tomorrow. João tries to be Colin’s wingman, but Colin isn’t into it. He’d rather talk to June than randoes. Jack wants to kiss Aesha, but he’s too wasted. In Hannah’s interview, she says, Travis is easy on the eyes, but there will be no feelings involved this season. The producer asks what about making out with him, and Hannah says, that’s not a feeling. I think she’s confusing the word feeling with emotion here.

In the taxi going back, Hannah says she thinks Jack and Aesha are cute. Jack licks Aesha’s foot, and asks for a little nibble of her bellybutton. Jack says she looks like she’s been raped. Aesha says she has been, and it’s not funny. Can they not talk about it? In Aesha’s interview, she says there are few things she won’t joke about, and rape isn’t funny at all. Jack asks if she’s okay. He feels badly about it. The crew gets back to the boat. In her interview, Aesha says, you don’t know what people have been through, so you should watch what you say. Amen to that. The crew sleeps.

The producer asks if Aesha is normally this open. Aesha cries, saying she remembers she kept apologizing to her mother, thinking it was her fault. Her mom said they all get wasted, and they have the right to feel safe. She thinks it’s important for women not to blame themselves. You should be able to party and not worry about it. João gives Jack a priority checklist. In Jack’s interview, with tears in his eyes, he tells us that he said something stupid. He jokes about sex all the time, and he’s a d*ckhead. He wants to talk to Aesha. They almost have me crying here. They’re both very sweet, and it’s unfortunate he made that mistake. I don’t think she’s holding it against him though.

Jack finds Aesha, and hugs her. He says how sorry he is. She says she knows Jack isn’t malicious. She’s just making people aware. He feels bad for her. In her interview, Aesha says she doesn’t want to be a gilded survivor. That’s not her. She’s just her, and it happened to her. It’s not who she is. She tells him that he’s the sweetest man.

The crew cleans up. In her interview, Hannah says Travis is adorable, but she’s not emotionally invested. Jack and Aesha will be there, so it will be easier to swallow. Not in a sexual way. June asks Anastasia where some glasses are, and Anastasia says she doesn’t really know. In her interview, June says, Anastasia gets a little crabby. You’d think she would have more sympathy and help her out. It’s confusing. Anastasia says she has other things to worry about, and June says she’ll figure it out. In João’s interview, he’s surprised Hannah is going out with Travis. He feels protective of the people he likes, and he likes her. He thinks she deserves more.

Jack and Travis are technically off the clock, and begin drinking beer. It’s time for the preference sheet meeting, so the captain gets together with Hannah, João, and Anastasia. The primary is Johnny Damon, a two-time World Series winner, once with the Red Sox, and again with the Yankees. He’s coming with his wife Michelle, and a bunch of other people. One of their requests is to visit Monaco. Hannah says they have a long preference sheet. She says they want local food, and anything with truffles. In Anastasia’s interview, she says she’s feeling confident. If she can please the Queen of Versailles, she can please this guy.

An alarm goes off, and black water system flashes on the computer screens. Travis and Jack continue to goof off. Even though he’s being radioed by everyone, engineer Mike doesn’t miss a beat in doing his strength training. João says it means no toilets or water. The captain tells Jack and Travis, stop drinking, and find the engineer. If they can’t fix it, they have to cancel the charter. Captain Sandy mumbles about them being drunk, and says, it’s ridiculous. It’s not cool. Travis looks for the engineer, while Jack has a smoke. Travis says it’s not their job.

In his interview, João says it’s not against the rules drink after work hours, but it is against the rules to ignore alarms. It’s the lowest level of respect being shown to him and the captain. Captain Sandy continues to look for Mike. Water is backed up in one of the work rooms. Hannah doesn’t want to go on a date with someone who’s wasted. Travis says it’s not his job to check the alarms, and Jack finds Mike. Mike goes to deal with the problem, and Captain Sandy asks Jack if he’s been standing there the whole time. She tells him, today’s not the day not to hustle. He’ll be off the boat so fast. When she sees him next time, he’d better be moving. She tells him, get the room cleaned up. Mike says, it’s clogged. Jack mops. The captain says she’s going to strangle Jack. In her interview, Captain Sandy says, the clog was related to the pump. They repaired the pump, and got the toilets working. Jack tells Travis, hide the beer.

Travis and Jack step off the boat. Travis says they have no connection to the problems happening. Jack says they can have a beer after work. Hannah approaches, and asks Jack if they can do the date another day. She doesn’t want to go after he’s been drinking beer all day. He says it was a stupid move on his part, but he’s going with or without her. She tells him, have fun. In his interview, he says he feels bad. He’s not actually drunk. He tells her, just come, but she goes back to the boat. Jack says, she’s playing hard to get. João joins them, and says they’re pissing the captain off. Travis tells João, it’s five o’clock. In João’s interview, he says he realizes he can’t come out guns blazing with these guys. He has to be diplomatic. Travis says, no beer before five.

Hannah finds Captain Sandy in the crew mess. She says she wanted to make sure the captain isn’t stressed, and tells her they’ll be fine. The captain gives her a hug. In Hannah’s interview, she says she’s felt Captain Sandy’s wrath before, and doesn’t want to again. The captain says, it means a lot, and Hannah says the captain doesn’t have anyone above her to tell her that. Anastasia goes over the menu. In her interview, Anastasia says, people who excel have raw passion and raw skill. June does laundry. In Colin’s interview, he says he finds it hard to talk to June. He’s working on his game.

Aesha asks Jack where they’re going on the date. Travis says he and Hannah aren’t coming. Jack feels badly, but just wants to have a good time tonight. Aesha chooses her outfit. Jack gets dressed up. Aesha is excited. She says with other boyfriends, she’d get drunk, and barely remember their first kiss. She wants to remember all the nice things. She deserves it. Jack puts on in his suit. In his interview, João says he can’t control people’s personal lives. He’s happy Jack is going on a date, but if it was him, he’d lay low because of the mistake he made.

Colin listens to music. Travis gets in his suit, and approaches Hannah, who’s sitting on the bow of the ship. In Jack’s interview, he says he likes Hannah, and hopes this isn’t too awkward. He scares hell out of her when he suddenly appears, and she asks what he’s wearing. He says he decided to make himself look pretty to sit with her. In his interview, he says his parents don’t drink, and wouldn’t appreciate his pinhead antics. Hannah asks why today, when he knew they had a date? In his interview, he says with any job that’s physically demanding, you feel like you’re entitled at the end of the day, and it’s the start of bad habits. She hugs him.

Jack asks for little kiss, but Aesha says, later. She wants the right timing this evening.

João says, oh the irony. Last season he had to worry about his job and two girls. This season he’s in a good place if he can just fix the sh*t show of a deck team. Hannah takes a selfie with Travis. He asks if he should get some rosé.

Aesha toasts to their first night. She says Jack isn’t her type. In her interview, she says she likes the alpha male, who can be an a-hole. Jack is a bit softer. She tells him they can be the most disgusting version of themselves with each other. In his interview, Jack says he’s witnessed true love, and wants it. A guitar player serenades them. On the boat, Hannah and Jack make out

Aesha tells Jack, this could be his moment, and they kiss. In Aesha’s interview, she says she thinks a kiss changes the dynamic of a relationship, bringing in an intimate side. She’s exited to have that with Jack. She likes him, and has no idea where it’s going, but just wants to have fun, and take day by day. They make out in the taxi, and she tells Jack he’s getting greedy. Hannah snacks in her bunk. Back on the boat, Aesha jumps in bed with Travis, while Jack takes a pee. Aesha takes a peek, and tells Jack that he has a nice willy.

The next morning, Colin asks Jack how the date went, and if he and Aesha are Facebook official. The boat is readied. Aesha thanks Jack for last night, saying, it was the nicest thing ever. Hannah cuts lemons and limes. In her interview, she says she’s concerned about June. She’s not answering the radio, she’s struggling with cabins, and the beds haven’t been turned down. Hannah isn’t sure what’s happening, but she was clearly a bit of a twat in her last life. It’s like the last three seasons all over again. Captain Sandy announces the guests are arriving at noon. Colin burps. The crew lines up.

The captain welcomes the guests. Colin shakes Johnny’s hand, and in his interview, says he’s not washing his hand again. Captain Sandy tells João that he’s taking them off the dock. Hannah does the tour, while the captain walks João through the steps. In her interview, she says she’s not rewarding him for last night, but he needs to feel responsibility. She wants to show him how he needs to teach his crew. In João’s interview, he’s thrilled that the captain is giving him the opportunity after what’s gone wrong. It proves she has his back, but anything can go wrong at any time. Aesha gives champagne to the guests, one of whom is a GYN, who’s already talking loudly about vaginas. Hannah is like, oh my God. Captain Sandy points out a boat at the bow that Jack missed. In her interview, the captain says, coming up as a woman in the industry wasn’t easy. She had to constantly work harder than her male counterparts. If a crew member has the willingness to learn, she wants to give them the opportunity. She tells João, good job. In his interview, he says there are few moments in his life he’ll talk about forever, and this is one of them.

In June’s interview, she says, Aesha is patient and kind. You don’t meet many people like that, but she’s not used to scowls. They put fresh flowers in the napkin rings. Anastasia thinks simplicity is key with these guests. She wants to make it fancy, but more low key than sea urchin and caviar. Hannah tries to get June on the radio. June finally comes upstairs, and Hannah tells her to keep her earpiece in. Aesha tells June, it’s all good, and let it go over her head. Johnny says he’ll bang everyone. In her interview, Hannah says somehow she doubts it. Me too.

Aesha asks if she can get the guests anything. Johnny says they’re fabulous. Lunch is Caesar salad, and in her interview, Hanna says, it’s like a meal you can get from your local Chili’s. I dunno about that, unless her local Chili’s is a lot more sophisticated than mine. As much as she wants Anastasia to succeed, she wants her back because she’s selfish. Johnny continues bragging about his sexual prowess. In Jack’s interview, he says he’s over doing double duty. The guests play in the water. June tends bar, and has a problem opening the wine. Clouds come, and the guests get nervous, especially when the boat starts rocking. Captain Sandy says the sea is rough there, but when they go around the corner, it will be calm. That sounds like the weather in my area. Colin and João try to get the jet skis back onto the boat. Colin wonders where the rest of the deck crew is. Johnny steps in to help, and pulls the jet ski back on deck with his teeth. Not really, but he’s pretty jacked, and gets the jet ski in. In Colin’s interview, he says it’s embarrassing when two deckhands can’t get the jet ski back because of a swell, and they have a two time World Series champion helping them.

Anastasia calls Travis to the galley. In Hannah’s interview, she says she’s gotten closer to Travis since he’s been in the galley. He has depth to him, but uses alcohol to suppress his emotions, which a lot of people are guilty of. Captain Sandy radios the deck crew, saying the slide is still on the side of the boat. She needs it brought in now. Travis seems annoyed at helping, and she asks, why the attitude? June irons. Aesha tells Hannah that June is doing well. Colin tells João that Travis is helping in the galley, and in his interview, João says he’s going to have to put a stop to that. Pointing to another yacht, João says, that’s fifty meters, right? and Colin says he doesn’t know what a meter is, but sure. I literally lol. Colin is a funny guy.

For some reason, Hannah isn’t thrilled with the food. The guests are talking about circumcision, and ask Hannah’s opinion. She says she’s never had to worry about it. In the galley, Anastasia asks the other crew members to lower the volume while she’s plating. In Aesha’s interview, she says, Anastasia does two charters and all of a sudden, she’s an artist who needs quiet time. The entrée is filet mignon. A few of the guests want it cooked a little more, and Hannah brings their dishes back to the galley. In Anastasia’s interview, she says it’s annoying to her that the steaks aren’t cooked properly. She’s a perfectionist, and thinks it comes from her mother. She thinks you have to be a perfectionist in the industry, and adds she’d rather undercook something than overcook it. Good point. You can’t exactly take it back. The guests proclaim it’s all good. June tells Colin about Anastasia being annoyed with too many people in the galley. He suggests she call Anastasia out on it, but she doesn’t want an issue. She tells him that she doesn’t feel welcome. In her interview, she says she dropped her life because they needed her. She treats people with respect, and expects to be treated the same way. She tells Colin not to say anything.

João calls Jack to the bridge. He goes over some navigational things, and gives Jack some seafaring hints. In João’s interview, he says he wants to motivate the crew, and teach them what he knows. He wants it to work out for all of them. Hannah cleans up dinner, and the guests act stupid in the lounge, wrestling each other. Johnny announces bedtime, and flips his wife over his shoulder.

Hannah tells June not to have her phone with her all the time. Colin tries to get the anchor up, but it’s stuck. He says, it’s getting caught on something. Captain Sandy says, there’s definitely something on the chain. She calls Travis to get on the tender. João says at 17 meters, he can scuba. They need see what’s going on. Colin tells João, the best thing about yachting is that nothing ever goes well. Sandy tells João to go in, and radios Travis to go with him. The captain tells the guests the goal is to get them to Monaco, and they’ll meet them there. Hannah tells Aesha and June that they need to distract the guests. In Jack’s interview, he wonders, for the wages they get, what’s the point of doing the scuba dive? He wouldn’t want to risk his neck. In Travis’s interview, he says if you get pinned down by the chain at 40 meters, you’re dead. Hannah radios June. Sandy watches as João gets in the water. Hannah decides to look for June. In her interview, Hannah says she doesn’t care if you make a mistake, take too long, or even sleep on your break. Just keep your earpiece in when she radios. Sandy continues watching out for Travis and João. In her interview, she says, if they don’t communicate, one slip could be the end of their life. Hannah tells June that she’s been radioing her.

Travis and João start to go down the chain, and the guests leave for Monaco.

Later in the season, partying, putt-putt, a guest is king of the world, Colin gets another injury, Captain Sandy says yachting isn’t Hannah’s passion, Hannah says Anastasia has gotten too big for her britches, Travis is called out for his drinking, a storm comes up, and Ben is back.

🗽 Million Dollar Listing New York is back on Thursday, August 1 at 9 pm.  

😮 A Surprise Surprise…

I was more surprised than Jason Momoa, when I saw two of his guests were Neil and Lucas from General Hospital.

🏰 Farewell To One of Storybrook’s Finest Citizens…

An untimely for a Once Upon A Time cast member.

🍵 A Cup of Wives…

Shannon makes it Instaficial.

Camille takes a walk.

Ken stands up for his lady love. Ken is the best.

Vicki has me confused. Did I miss something?

Yes, I did miss something. Be sure to check out the Southern Charm video after the RHOC trailer.

While I rarely watch RHOA anymore, I think Cynthia deserves all good things. But poor Peter. He’s really going to have to give up now. Or step up his game.

They’re back.

🌴 In Another Part of Beverly Hills…

Already Jax and Brittany have problems. What a shock.

They also have a $2 million dollar home. I wouldn’t call it a mansion though.

👶 Sad News For MJ…

But she does have baby Shams, and a beautiful pregnancy photo.

🔎 The Plot Thickens…

And in a move we didn’t think possible, T-Rav becomes an even sh*ttier person.

🏄 Oh Come On…

How is August almost here? And why aren’t there more songs about it?

July 24, 2019 – No Show Shiloh, a Charming Dinner For Some, a Tweet, It’s Back Ya’ll, a Whole Pot of Beverly Hills Tea & How Does It Happen?


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Um… That’s what I said when I was hoping for some Shiloh scenes, and instead saw Robert Mueller on my TV.

Here’s what their FB page said: Due to the ongoing hearings on Capitol Hill, today’s episode of #GH will instead air tomorrow. Believe us when we say that it’s worth the wait. Stay tuned.

Here’s what I said: People’s Court, here I come.

Here’s what Soaps in Depth said:

Southern Charm

It’s morning in Colorado. The group trickles downstairs (or up, in Shep’s case) for breakfast. Austen says Madison is already out skiing. Chelsea wears a hat inside because she’s a wimp cold. Craig is making breakfast, and Shep thinks Craig is in the early lead for the MVP of the trip. Craig tells Cameran it’s strange with Austen and Madison. Austen says they have lessons set up for those who don’t ski or snowboard. Eliza says she just knows how to ride a horse. Kathryn comes in wearing some kind of undereye mask things. Craig asks Austen if he and Madison hooked up. That’s a no, but Kathryn asks if he was thinking about it. In his interview, Austen says it’s clear he can’t help himself around Madison. If the opportunity presents itself, he’s jumping at the chance.

Cameron is concerned she’s not on the rest of the group’s level with skiing, and she’s accident prone. In her interview, she says the trip was planned for her to get her mojo back, but she’s a mother now. She drives at the speed limit and doesn’t partake in dangerous activities. God forbid she won’t be there for her child, and she doesn’t want Jason to remarry. She FaceTimes with Palmer. As much as a baby can FaceTime anyway. Shep has to sit things out because of his injury. Whitney says he broke an ankle skiing once. Just one wrong angle and… Cameran doesn’t want to do it now.

Shep wonders why he’s always the first one ready. Even though Madison is already out there, and Austen is sitting there waiting. Craig joins them, bringing along his own snowboard. Shep asks why Eliza takes so long, and she says this is high maintenance, indicating herself. Either accept her or don’t. Kathryn comes in wearing a red ski outfit, with giant furry red earmuffs. Shep asks what planet she’s from, and she says, not this one. I hear that. The bus arrives, and they head out. When they get to the ski resort, Craig says, Kathryn looks like a Teletubby. Austen say he’s getting excited, and Craig says this is his Hallmark dream.

Everyone gets equipped, and those taking lessons go with the instructor. Cameran says she knows how to ski, but she’s sticking with the students. Whitney and Shep decide to get something to eat. Whitney shows Shep how to get oxygen out of something that looks like an airhorn. He tells Shep it helps you get acclimated, but Shep thinks it might be the biggest scam in the world. Clearly, he knows little about scams. They watch Eliza, Danni, Cameran, and Kathryn take a lesson. Madison meets the others, wondering what they’ve been doing. She’s been out since eight. The instructor tells the girls, the number one rule is don’t fall off, as he puts them on a conveyer belt, where they try to balance themselves.

The others take a lift to the hilltop. Shep takes pictures of the lesson. Cameran says she’s too old for this. Chelsea does great, until she falls. Don starts going too fast, and falls, but says, it was amazing. Cameran says they’re all pros now. Don sees a sign that says Happy Hour, and says that’s his next stop. Cameran suggests getting food. Shep, Austen, Madison, and Craig snowboard. Austen asks Madison for a hug, and asks if she missed him. Craig tells them to stop making out, and Austen says he wishes they were.

Danni and Kathryn take the gondola to meet the others. Kathryn freaks a little because she’s going backward. Danni asks what the plans are for dinner, and Kathryn says there’s a chef preparing a marijuana infused dinner at the house. She’s the white elephant [sic] in the room. In her interview, Kathryn says at her lowest point in life, she smoked weed, and her life turned upside down. We see a clip of her saying it was her drug of choice. She says it was the reason she lost her children for a while. She tells Danni, it’s like a big slap in the face – and rude. She also feels awkward about Whitney, and tells Danni that she still has the message in her phone. He asked her to come over, and she said she was with her mom. We read the text of him telling her not to say where she’s going. She tells Danni he wanted to have a quiet night. Danni reads the whole exchange, and says she feels like she watched them have sex. She tells Kathryn that men confuse her sometimes. I don’t know if I believe it, but see below for something I saw on twitter as to a possible reason for Whitney being a jerk. Besides him just being a jerk in general.

Naomie is in the car when Ashley calls. Ashley wonders if she’d be up for grabbing a drink. In Naomie’s interview, she says she’s never gotten a colonoscopy, but sounds better. A bikini wax, a severed arm, her foot run over by a car. She tells Ashley that she’s heading back to her office in Mt. Pleasant. Ashley knows a bar there, and promises to make it quick. Naomie groans. In her interview, she says, everyone deserves a second chance, even if it’s her 27th chance.

The group meets for lunch. Shep says they have a weed dinner tonight, and have more grams than they effing know what to do with. Whitney says they’re like Cheech and Chong. Kathryn and Danni join them, saying the ride was beautiful. Austen says, it’s pretty, but too freakin’ cold. A bell rings in the bar, and they hear a chant, ring that bell. Austen rings it like a maniac, and Shep finds out, when someone rings it, they have to buy a round for the bar. Shep says, Austen is going bankrupt. The total is $250. Austen goofs around with Madison, and Madison tells him, Shep is getting mad. Austen says Shep wants him to be single. Shep says Austen thinks he’s king of the bar. Austen suggests putting it on Shep’s tab. I really get the feeling that Shep is jealous of those he puts down, but I can’t figure out why, or what exactly he’s jealous of.  He’s insecure in some way.

Naomie goes to the bar, and orders an extra-large glass of rosé. She downs it before Ashely comes in. Ashley arrives, and Naomie asks for another. Ashley says, maybe make it a bottle. Naomie says, so..? Ashley says she appreciates Naomie meeting her. Naomie is straight shooter, like herself, and their convictions are strong. It’s obvious Naomie wishes she’d get to the point, and Ashley admits she made it uncomfortable for everyone when they last met. We flash back to her appearance at Eliza’s brunch. Ashley was hoping to get a second chance. She knows it’s wishful thinking, but she doesn’t want to hold a grudge. Naomie says Ashley’s behavior is erratic, and she doesn’t know what she’s going to get; is Ashley going to be nice or call her a bitch? Ashley says, it was just one time, and Naomie asks if it needs to be more. Ashley says she had a lapse in judgement, and besides, she said it in a nice way. Naomie is a bad bitch. In Naomie’s interview, she wonders why she does this to herself. She feels tired. Yep. There are some people who drain me just by hearing their voice. Ashley says she also wants Naomie’s advice on her relationship with Kathryn. Looking back, she’s had no chance to apologize, and wonders how she goes about that. If she runs into Kathryn, should she approach her? Naomie wisely says, no. She doesn’t think so. She doesn’t think Kathryn would be receptive. Ashley wonders, what if she just says, hello, and Naomie says, no. She called Kathryn an egg donor. Ashley says people put things in her head. She owns her actions, and wishes she could go back and fix it, but it’s too late. She’s actually on Kathryn’s side. Naomie asks for more wine. Ashley says she’s done, but doesn’t want to be enemies.

Shep and Austen split a gummy. Shep admits he’s been stoned all day. In Austen’s interview, he says, weed is legal there, and he thinks hiring a skilled chef is a fun thing to do. Get that man a thesaurus. Chef Roilty arrives.  The chef explains there will be four courses. He uses a small amount, and it builds. Shep asks if it will make anyone wild, but Chef Roilty assures him, he knows how to do this.

Craig tells Madison, it’s nice she and Austen are getting along, and asks what’s going on with them. Madison asks what he means, and he says they were being cutesy. Be honest. She says Craig and Shep seem to have something to say about her and Austen’s relationship. They’re a couple of hypocrites, giving advice on a relationship they know nothing about. Craig doesn’t think they should be together, and Madison says, if Austen isn’t asking his opinion, don’t give it. That’s all she asks.

Chelsea says, it smells delicious. The chef explains that he has infused olive oil and infused butter for the meal. Chelsea asks why Austen’s eyes look jacked up. The chef brings out some CBD wine. Chelsea asks if Austen is stoned, and he says he just took a gummy. She can’t believe he did that just before the dinner. Cameran comes in and says, it smells like ganja. She doesn’t want any weed in her food, but takes a sip of the wine. She tells Austen that his eyes are barely open. Chelsea offers Whitney some of the CBD wine, and he asks what that means. I find it hard to believe he’s never heard of it. I’m sure he goes on the internet.

Next door, Kathryn teases her hair. Madison shows up next, dressed in black. Shep says she looks like a femme fatale, and looks extra special tonight. She asks why he’s being nice to her, and he says he’s nice all the time. She asks for a gummy, and they go into the other room. He tells her not to have a whole one, since she’s probably only half his weight, but she says. let her be the judge, and pops one in her mouth. He says he’s starting to think she’s cool, but she should admit she’s toying with Austen’s emotions. She says Shep called her white trash, and she’s not tolerating that kind of behavior from him. He’s making a comment without even knowing her. Shep says it kept coming up, and he’s going to take his friend’s side. She says she thinks he’s a bad influence, and he says, free will’s a MF-er. She asks why he’s getting involved, and he says Austen doesn’t behave like his normal, fun-loving self, and he thinks she brings out the downer in him. She says it’s probably because Shep is breathing down his neck. He says she doesn’t like them hanging out, but she says she’s not controlling; she doesn’t care. In the living room, Austen wonders what tale Shep is weaving. Madison tells Shep she’s not saying she and Austen are going to live happily ever after, or that they’ll even be together, but they do feel some kind of way. Shep says they’re both attracted, but that seems to be the only thing they have in common. He then admits, maybe he’s wrong. She says, 100%, and he says he was angry, and said things he shouldn’t have. It was rude, and he apologizes. Does she accept? She says she’ll think about it. Madison comes back past the kitchen. She says, it smells weird. She sees the chef, and says, sorry. She’s sure he’s doing a great job.

Madison tells Austen that Shep apologized, but she doesn’t care enough to really focus on it. He tells her not to concern herself with it. Chef Roilty says, dinner is ready. He’s decorated the table with leaves he brought from home. He tells them nothing is infused unless they want it to be. He puts the salad dressing and melted butter for the pasta on the table. Eliza thinks they should say a blessing. Cameran is like, not over weed, and Shep thanks God for this leaf. Eliza says they’ll go to church when they get back. Craig asks about the strength, and the chef says it’s five to ten milligrams per serving. Nothing crazy. Craig asks what it tastes like, and Shep says, it tastes like victory. Cameran sniffs the butter. Shep says, drink it, but she says she’d be toasted, and call 911. He tells her, just go to bed if that happens, and she says, ya’ll are peer pressure. Shep and Austen laugh over nothing. In Cameran’s interview, she says it’s entertaining to watching her friends get high on the wacky weed, but she’s realizing there’s no getting her mojo back. Her mojo is retired.

Kathryn wants to let Austen know that it’s okay for her to be around this. It’s not awkward. He doesn’t get what she’s saying, so she says, it would have been nice if he’d asked if she was cool. He says he just assumed, and she says she’s not worried about wanting to do it, but she went to rehab for it. She couldn’t see the kids because of it. He says he’s sorry, but she says, don’t be sorry. She’s just glad it’s not an awkward situation. In Austen’s interview, he says he should have thought about it. He definitely doesn’t want her to feel isolated. Don wonders who will take care of Austen and Shep later on when they can’t speak English. Kathryn says, not her. Shep swallows a spoonful of the butter, and pretends to be all weird. Kathryn shows Craig and Danni something on her phone, and says Whitney said she was a drug addict sociopath. We see a 2016 clip from Watch What Happens Live with Whitney, Landon, and Cameran as guests. Whitney says Kathryn seems like this poor single mother, but she’s a drug addict, violent sociopath. Kathryn say she was just recalling when she had trouble; reminding herself. She says she has to go to the bathroom. It gets quiet as she leaves. Outside, she says she can’t do this.

Madison says these are Austen’s friends. Austen says they have fun together, and Madison says she sees why he doesn’t go home. Craig goes looking for Kathryn. He finds her in the other house, and asks if she’s all right. She says she just needed a minute. She thought she’d be cooler about it, but it’s bringing up memories of a traumatic time in her life. She says she doesn’t want to make a big deal, but Austen never said anything. In her interview, Kathryn says he planned it ahead of time, but never thought it might bother her in any way. It just shows where their focus is – on themselves. Kathryn just wanted him to ask if she’d be cool with it. Back at the table, Chelsea wonders where Kathryn and Craig are.  Kathryn says they talked so much sh*t about her. Whitney has given her a million eff yous. He looked her in the eye, and said they didn’t have sex, but he’s flattered. She gets that he doesn’t want his personal sh*t out there, but it’s already out there. She tells Craig that she’s just processing so she can get over it. I’m so with her on this. They’ve been flaunting legal weed in her face since they got there. Not on purpose, but they’re being thoughtless. It’s not like she just stop smoking either. That was a big deal.

Danni films Shep eating infused potatoes. He demands more weed butter. Craig comes back, and Austen asks if Kathryn is okay. Craig says, she’s not, because of him and Shep. She’s taking a breather because she got a blast from the past. Shep and Chelsea can’t stop laughing. Craig says Austen didn’t ask Kathryn about the weed dinner before throwing it in front of her. Cameran says, didn’t Austen ask her? and he says, no. Austen thanks Craig for saying something, and he says it’s not as much about him as Whitney. Cameran asks, what’s wrong? and Whitney is oblivious, and says goodnight. Craig asks if Whitney isn’t going to make sure Kathryn is okay. Whitney wonders what’s going on, and Craig says he denied hooking up with her, and made her feel like sh*t. He made her cry. They know he and Kathryn had sex. Shep asks how Craig knows. Did he smell Whitney’s junk? Craig says, the person he claims is his friend is upset, and he could care less. Shep says, couldn’t, and Craig corrects it to, couldn’t care less. He says, years ago, Whitney said she shouldn’t have her kids because of what she’s doing, and now they’re celebrating it. What would it cost him to make sure she’s okay? Whitney says Craig is a busybody, and should focus on himself. Craig says he should talk to her. In Craig’s interview, he says if someone denied having sex with him, it would hurt his feelings. He’d be like, he wasn’t that bad. Kathryn doesn’t fit on Whitney’s level of society, and it’s a dirty little secret for him.

Whitney goes to the other house, and looks for Kathryn. He doesn’t see her anywhere, but finds her outside on the porch swing in the dark. He asks if everything is all right. Someone said she was upset with him. She say she doesn’t want talk about it. Please let her be. He leaves.

Next time, the group goes swimming, Shep says he has nothing to hide, Austen doesn’t want to lsoe Madison, Danni wonders what’s wrong with Shep and Austen, and Shep wants ot know why Austen lets Madison walk on him.

🐦 Patricia Agreed...

Reality TV Bliss tweeted: @RealityTVBliss Replying to @ellenburnham and @Pataltschul  Are you keeping up with the custody hearing? Thomas is trying to have cast members deposed and production.  Some already have to go in. He’s alleging she’s a sex addict so YES he would be next on his hit list of witnesses #SouthernCharm

In other words, Whitney is pretending nothing happened so his ass doesn’t get dragged into court. Apparently, in a desperate move, Thomas is saying Kathryn shouldn’t have the kids because she’s a sex addict. I think at this point, the court will probably laugh at him. He’s done. Regardless, Whitney is still being a wuss.

🐮 The Real Housewives of Dallas returns, Wednesday, September 4th, at 9 pm.

🍸 Meanwhile, In Beverly Hills…

Camille worked hard for the money.

Sadly, it hasn’t been LVP’s year.

She still soldiers on though. Project Angel Food is the best. When we were more broke than we are now, some friends got together and had food sent to us through them. The name fits. It was heavenly.

Like the Reunion itself isn’t enough, there’s the rehash afterward.

It’s like the Energizer bunny.

Reality TV isn’t a job for the faint of heart. It’s too bad. I have to admit, although I wanted to like Billie, she was becoming more and more like just one more drama queen. We already have Scheana for that.

❓ No Explanation…

No matter what time frame I have, I always end up running late. I had extra time today, so why…?















July 23, 2019 – Dustin Makes Another Appearance, Camille Walks, No Ambitions, a Thought, Some Justice for Dina & Awake


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

I miss the first half-minute.

As they go into Kelly’s, Sasha tells Michael that she’s hoping for more sun this weekend. Michael says he has to give her a raincheck. Something important came up.

Outside Kelly’s, Josslyn tells Dev, if he wants to drive one of Sonny’s cars, ask him.  He says there’s no reason for Milo and Max to give her rides, when he has a valid driver’s license. She says, it’s a license Sonny bought. Dev didn’t take classes or pass a test. Dev says, who needs a test? He can steal a car and drive away. That practically makes him an expert.

Hayden goes to the hospital, hoping to run into Elizabeth. Finn says she clocked out. He’s glad Hayden cleared everything up at the police station. She says she didn’t push Obrecht overboard, so they let her go. She tells him, a brother is a big branch of the family tree to keep secret, and he says that’s something coming from her. She’s kept her fair share from him.

Valentin and Curtis meet at The Floating Rib. Curtis says he had to look at Jax’s files again. He gives Valentin a folder, and says these are his copies, but everything is already public knowledge. Valentin says he needs to know why Jax has a file on Cassandra. Curtis says Valentin needs to tell him. Jax has a file on both Valentin and Cassandra, so what do they have in common? He knows there’s bad blood between them, but can Valentin think of any reason they would be on Jax’s radar? Valentin says he couldn’t tell him, and Curtis says he’s not big on explanations. Valentin says he’s paying Curtis to dig around, and extending the retainer. Call if he finds anything important. Valentin flips through the papers, and says, this is interesting.

Hayden tells Finn that they both have secrets, and Finn wonders where it got them. His phone dings, and he says he needs to text Anna back. Hayden says he doesn’t have to explain. He says explaining themselves was never their thing. Hayden sees Lucy, who didn’t know she was back in town. She asks if Hayden is just breezing through, or is she looking for someone else to manipulate? Hayden says she wants to put serious roots down this time. Maybe Lucy can help. She was wondering if that cool house she once had in escrow is still on market? Lucy asks if she means the one she and Finn were planning to purchase. Hayden says, that’s the one.

Michael tells Sasha, the trip isn’t canceled, just postponed. He meant to tell her earlier, but they got distracted. She says, sorry, not sorry. They can go another time. She’s sure her mom will be happy she can work. He says, hopefully not all of the days. He has an important function to go to, and he’d like her to be his plus one. She says, of course (🍷). It gives her an excuse to raid the Crimson closet. He suggests wearing something more casual. It’s his godson’s first birthday, which means cake and a big mess. Sasha thinks she’ll survive, and he asks if it’s not too domestic. She says she wouldn’t miss it for the world, and they kiss.

Josslyn says she doesn’t care how many cars Dev has stolen in – he says, Bridgeport. She says, wherever he’s from, it’s illegal and draws unwanted attention. At least don’t mess things up by breaking the law. Sonny’s already broken a lot of them for him to stay in the country. Don’t mess it up. Cameron and Trina come by, and Cameron asks, mess what up?

Maxie pounds on Lulu’s door, asking if Lulu is still mad at her. She’ll do anything to make it better. I’d tell her to start by stopping that banging. Lulu opens the door to Maxie and Peter, saying, she’s not mad. She just doesn’t want to be around people right now. Maxie asks, why not?  Lulu hands her the papers, and Maxie asks what they are. Lulu says, divorce papers. They walk in, and Lulu says, that’s why she didn’t want them to come in. She can’t deal with the look on their faces. It’s humiliating. She needs to focus. She’s been staring at the papers for hours, and can’t figure out how to tell Rocco. Charlotte is with Valentin and Nina, and she’ll be upset, but Rocco is going to be crushed. Maxie says, no offense, but she’s in no shape at the moment. Rocco takes his cues from her. She points to Lulu’s outfit, and asks what’s with the get-up she’s got going on? Lulu asks if she’s supposed to put on a little black dress and tell Rocco that his father is never coming home. Maxie says Lulu is supposed to put on a little black dress, and go drinking with her.

Hayden says Lucy made her point. Lucy says if Hayden is thinking about making Port Charles he home again, she has a junior three-bedroom that would behoove a single woman such as herself. Hayden says she can find another realtor that will be happy to take her commission without insulting her. Lucy does some hand gestures (not that one), and says, it’s the negativity washing away. She was never one to say no to a sale. She gives Hayden her card, and Hayden reminds her, the customer is always right. Finn asks if Hayden is thinking of buying a place, and Hayden says she’s keeping her options open.

Lulu asks Maxie if she supposed to toss back a few tequila shots, but Maxie says, not in a celebratory way. Lulu says, hard pass. She’s not in the mood. Maxie says it will be good for her to get out of the house. And those clothes she’s wearing… Lulu says she’s wearing leggings and a hoodie, not a burlap sack. Maxie says, talking will help, but Lulu says, no, it won’t. She’ll cry and spiral. Maxie says, they can come up with a plan for her to tell the kids. Maxie tells Peter to back her up, but he says he’s not touching this. Lulu says, she can’t. It’s too late to get a sitter. Maxie looks at Peter, and says he can do it. He doesn’t mind, right? He says, no, but full disclosure, he has no experience with kids. Maxie says he’s great with James, but he says, James is a baby. He has no experience with small, walking, talking real humans. Lulu says, that’s a ringing endorsement, but Maxie says, it will be fine. Rocco is going to bed soon anyway. They’re going out.

Carly says, Lulu must be in shock, and asks Sonny how he’s holding up. He says he doesn’t know what to say. He wants Dante to get help, but he’s worried about Rocco. Carly says Lulu needs their support, and Sonny says she’s going to get it. Carly says it’s horrible to think, but it’s possible Dante’s not getting the help he needs. Sonny says it’s not like when he was looking for Dante in Ankara. If not for Dev, they wouldn’t have escaped. Carly knows he’s grateful. Sonny knows she’s worried Dev won’t fit in, but she says she may have been premature. He seems to be getting along okay.

Josslyn tells Cameron that Dev had been begging Sonny to drive his speedboat for weeks. Dev says it hasn’t been weeks, and he doesn’t beg. She says he’d been asking repeatedly. Sonny gave in, but it ran out of gas and had to be towed back. Rule number one; check the gas tank. Dev says, a valuable lesson, to be sure. He’ll check next time. Josslyn says he’s assuming there will be a next time. They start to bicker again, and Cameron says he’s going in to get coffee. Josslyn decides to go with him, and Trina tells Dev to sit. She wants to get to know him better before they get back. He asks what she wants to know, and she says, everything.

Josslyn sees Michael inside Kelly’s, and asks if he’s all right. He says the softball game got a little intense, but he’s all right. Has she recovered from Oscar’s will reading? She says she’s sorry she bolted, but he says he’s just glad she wasn’t alone, and thanks Cameron for taking care of her. He hopes he sees more of her, and she says he will, hugging him. Michael goes back to Sasha, and Cameron says following Josslyn to the park was nothing, but she says she doesn’t know what she would have done if he hadn’t shown up. He’s the only one who knows what it’s like to miss Oscar. Cameron says he misses Oscar too. She says she doesn’t mean to get emo. She just wants to say how much she appreciates it. He went above and beyond to help Oscar, and now he’s doing the same for her, helping her move on – whatever that means. She hugs him, and says he’s a good friend. You can tell Cameron is thinking, ugh. Friend zone.

Cameron and Josslyn go back outside, and Cameron says, sorry to interrupt. Trina says, don’t even. Dev was just telling her about Bridgeport. He doesn’t miss it. Dev says he likes Sonny’s place better. A guy comes by, and tells Cameron that his break is over. They’ve got to move. Cameron tells them he has to go. Community service calls.

Maxie and Lulu go to The Floating Rib. Maxie says, it’s the perfect atmosphere for a chill night out. Lulu says Maxie doesn’t have to keep telling her. Maxie suggests a pitcher of margaritas, and tells Lulu to take a seat. Maxie goes to the bar, and Lulu starts to leave, but bangs into Dustin, spilling his drink. He says, Leslie Lu, we meet again.

Peter asks if Rocco’s screen time is limited, and Rocco says to stop him in five minutes. Peter says, then what? and Rocco says, read him a story. He’s already brushed his teeth, so after that, he goes to bed. Peter appreciates his honesty, and Rocco says he doesn’t want his mom to worry, so they should do bedtime the way she wants it. Peter says when he’s done, pick out a book. Rocco says he’s done, and he knows what book he wants.

At The Floating Rib, Hayden sees Curtis, and hugs him before sitting down. She says she’s sorry she couldn’t catch up sooner. It got hectic at the office. He says trouble has a way of finding her, but she says, not anymore. In fact, she’s embarking on an apology tour. He’s up next. He asks, why him? They’re good. She says she wants to apologize for being a bad friend.  She’s really sorry she missed his wedding, but things were still raw with Finn, and didn’t want to be a distraction. Curtis says Finn was ready to forgive her taking off. That’s why he hired Curtis to track him down. Other than the note, she’s been a ghost since she left. What’s she been up to all this time?

Valentin asks Finn if he’s got a moment. Finn says he’s fresh out. Valentin says he can’t get ahold of Anna, and needs to talk about a mutual concern. Finn says she’s dealing with a family situation. Valentin wonders if she’s not taking Finn’s calls either. He asks Finn to let Anna know they need to talk about Cassandra Pierce.

Peter reads about a boy who has healing water. If there’s a sick person, and he sees death at their head, give them the water. But if death is at their feet, it’s in vain, and the sick man must die. Peter asks if Rocco is sure he wants this story, but Rocco says he’s not a baby; keep reading. Peter says, from that time forth, the boy could tell if the patient could be saved or not.

Dustin asks if Lulu is on another fake date. She says, not exactly. Maxie comes back. Lulu doesn’t say anything, so she introduces herself. Lulu introduces Dustin, explaining she spilled his drink. Dustin says he’d shake hands, but Maxie’s are full. Maxie says she can get a third glass if he wants to join them.

Peter says, the boy gave the man the water anyway, and it worked. They lived happily ever after. Rocco says, that’s not how it ends. It doesn’t work. and the man dies. Peter wonders why Rocco likes this story, but Rocco says he never said that. He said he wasn’t afraid.

Sasha tells Michael that they’ll have to put his dad’s island on their places-to-go list. He says he’d like to add another destination – her hometown. They should take a road trip. She hates to spoil it, but there’s not much to see. She tells him the woman behind his back is staring at them, and he looks. He says, that’s Lucy, she’s a known Port Charles eccentric. Sasha says, she hosts the Nurses Ball every year. Michael asks if Lucy wants to say hello to his girlfriend. Lucy introduces herself, and apologizes for staring. She says, in another life, Sasha could have been the face of Deception.

Finn tells Valentin that he’s familiar with Cassandra. Valentin would rather discuss it with Anna, and Finn says he can’t discuss it if she won’t take his calls. Valentin says Finn and Anna worked hard to bring Cassandra down, but now she’s free to be a menace to society. Finn asks if she’s a menace to society, or Nina.

Hayden tells Curtis that she moved around for a while, then connected with Jax, and decided to move back to Port Charles. She was worried how Finn might react, and Curtis asks if he’s next on her apology tour. She says she owes him one, but she’s worried he won’t be receptive. Curtis asks, why not? He’s happily engaged to Anna. She says, he’s moved on. So she did the far, far batter thing by leaving. He says, it couldn’t have been easy. It must have been hell losing a child.

Sonny asks if things are better with Josslyn, and Carly says, she’s coming around. She’s a perceptive girl, and can see that under the cocky charm, Dev is just a kid who’s worked hard to get here and have a better life. She doesn’t want to mess that up. Sonny knows how reckless Dev is, but he’s a fast learner. In a couple of months, no one will know ever lived anywhere else. Carly says it just hit her why Sonny is trying so hard to help Dev, and it’s not just because Dev helped him and Dante in Turkey.

Dev tells Josslyn that Sonny has complete faith in him. Josslyn says, okay. Trina sees Josslyn with the compass, and Josslyn says Oscar left it to her in his will. Trina says, it’s good and sad at the same time. Josslyn apologizes, saying she doesn’t mean be gloomy. She likes to keep the compass close. It’s one of the few physical things Oscar left her.

Community service dude takes Cameron to the footbridge. Cameron asks what they’re doing there. The guy says they have to deal with some complaints about the bridge. He’ll deal with the graffiti, and Cameron can take care of the locks on the railing. He gives Cameron a huge cutter, and we see the J+O lock.

Josslyn tells Trina that she’s trying to get to a place where she can think about Oscar and not get upset. She owes it to him to focus on the good times. Trina says they’re there for her; right? Dev says, right. Josslyn asks if Dev would mind getting home on his own. He says, sure, and asks if everything is okay. Josslyn says there’s just a place she wants to stop.

Sasha asks why Lucy said that. Lucy tells her Deception was the first cosmetic company she launched in the 90s. Has Sasha heard of it? Sasha says, no, sorry; and Lucy says, okay, you millennial. She loved it, and if she was still in business, she’d put Sasha’s lovely face under contract. She’s a model, right? Sasha says she’s a junior editor at Crimson, but don’t be impressed. Her mom is the editor and chief. Lucy says tell her mom to put her on the cover. She gives Sasha her card, and says if Sasha decides to pursue a modeling career, she has contacts she can put Sasha in touch with – for a small commission of course (🍷). It was nice to meet her. Ta! Michael says, she’s a character, and Sasha says, that’s one way to describe her. Michael asks if Sasha is going to call.

Maxie says, Dustin is a teacher; he must be smart. He says there’s one equation he’s still working out. His tuition debt plus a teacher’s salary equals extra jobs. Maxie suggests another round on her. He says he doesn’t want to intrude on girls night, but Lulu says he’s not. She’s just tired. He says he can help her wake up. Whitney Houston is his go-to karaoke muse. Lulu blurts out that her husband served her with divorce papers. Maxie says she’s going to close out her tab. She hopes Dustin is her ride share driver one day. Dustin asks if Lulu is okay. She says she’s sorry to be a downer, but he says, don’t apologize. It’s not his place, but he thinks her husband was a fool to let her go. Lulu says, he is. Dustin says he should go. He’ll see her around. He leaves, and Lulu starts to cry.

Peter looks for Rocco, and finds him under the kitchen island. Peter says it’s a comfy hiding spot. Does Rocco mind if Peter joins him? Peter sits, and asks, what’s going on? Rocco says he hates that story, and Peter asks why he wanted to hear it. Rocco says to prove he’s brave. Peter says, everyone gets scared. It’s okay to feel what he feels. He doesn’t have to always prove himself. The man in the book didn’t know how to be a dad. Rocco asks if that’s why his dad left; because he didn’t know how to be a dad. Peter bets he misses his dad a lot. Rocco says he’s mad at him for leaving them so long. Peter says he knows how Rocco feels, but Rocco says he doesn’t. Peter says his mom wasn’t around at all at Rocco’s age, or ever really, but she thought she was doing right by him, like Rocco’s dad. Rocco asks if Peter is mad at his mom, and Peter says he was for a long time. Rocco asks if he’s still mad, and Peter says he realized that parents are people too. They’re doing their best, but can make mistakes. That doesn’t mean it has anything to do with hm.

Trina asks if Dev feels like walking. He says he’s worried about Josslyn. She seemed upset. Trina says she didn’t buy Josslyn’s I’m fine act. Dev asks where she went, and Trina guesses the footbridge. It was her and Oscar’s special place.

Josslyn gets to the footbridge. The railing is bare, and she says, oh my God. It’s gone.

On Lulu’s porch, Maxie says she shouldn’t have dragged Lulu out. Another attempt at fixing things goes down in flames. Lulu says, no one was hurt this time, and Maxie says, progress. Lulu says she’s just not ready. She’ll tell Maxie when she is. They hug, and go inside, finding Peter and Rocco asleep on the couch together.

Hayden tells Curtis that she doesn’t want to talk about the baby or the last two years. He says he’s curious, but respects her boundaries. She says she doesn’t want to live in the past. She wants a fresh start. He clinks his beer bottle to her glass, and says, a fresh start.

Finn tells Valentin he doesn’t know the details, but knows Nina had something to do with putting Cassandra in a coma. Valentin tells him not to threaten Nina, but Finn says he has no intention of causing trouble for Nina. It was clearly self-defense, and he appreciates it. Valentin says he’d appreciate Finn passing along his message to Anna. He leaves, and Finn calls Anna. He says he had a semi-interesting conversation with Valentin. Apparently, something is going on with Cassandra.

Sasha tells Michael, Lucy isn’t even in business anymore, but he says she can refer Sasha to someone who is. I guess Nina can’t? He says she could totally be a model. She can be anything she wants; a lawyer, a veterinarian, a truck driver. She tells him that he’s sweet, and she actually gave the modeling world a spin after high school, but she didn’t end up on the pages of Crimson. He says, not yet. It’s the first thing she’s shared about her past. She says, there’s not much to tell. She’d rather focus on what’s ahead for them.

Carly says Sonny, helping Dev is proactive; something he can do and control the outcome. They can support Josslyn, but she has to work through her own grief. Dante is going to have to find his own way to his healing. The hard part of being a parent is that you can support, but you can’t control it. Dev is different. There are concrete steps Sonny can take; ways to get to the outcome he wants. Sonny says he never thought of it that way. She’s perceptive. She tells him, don’t sound so surprised. He says she constantly surprises him. Almost always in a good way.

Josslyn sits on the footbridge, and cries. Dev joins her, and asks, what’s wrong? She says, it’s gone, and he says, what? She says she and Oscar put their initials on a padlock, and locked it to the bridge. Dev says, there’s a bridge in Istanbul where they do that too. Josslyn says, it’s a symbol of their love lasting forever. Now it’s gone. He’s gone. Dev puts his arm out to her, and she slides over. He holds her.

Tomorrow, Jax wants to take Nina and Valentin out to dinner, Cameron tells Josslyn that he cut the locks, and Jason asks Carly if there’s something he’s not telling her about the baby.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – The Reunion – Part Two

At first, I wrote Part Three. Probably because I want it over.

We backtrack a little, with Dorit saying she realized it wasn’t that Teddi didn’t want to malign her, but that she didn’t want to be the only one who did. It hurt. Teddi says she and Dorit didn’t really have a relationship prior to this year. We flash back to Teddi accusing Dorit of not being above board. Andy says Teddi never went to LVP directly, and asked about it. Teddi says when she was told by a person who works with and idolizes LVP, that LVP wants to use her name, she just went along. As usual, the accountability coach avoids the real question. She never once went to LVP and asked what’s up with this Dorit thing, and why do you want me involved? Andy says, viewers feel Dorit was the original cause of the mess by not returning the dog in the first place, and admitting her mistake. Thank you, viewers. Dorit says, 100%. She has so many regrets. Camille doesn’t understand why Dorit didn’t return the dog. Dorit says she thought what she was doing was in the dog’s best interest, and believed the dog was going to a loving home. LisaR says she called LVP the next day, and LVP never once said she couldn’t rehome the dog. Andy asks if someone was sent to check out the new home, and Dorit says, there was never a home visit. Didn’t all this stuff happen pretty quickly? They remind me of some people I know who think you exist in a vacuum when you’re not in their orbit. LVP probably trusted Dorit’s judgement – who knows what Dorit told her – and it’s not like everyone at Vanderpump Dogs has nothing else to do. They couldn’t possibly have planned ahead for a random decision Dorit was going to make. Which, I might add, was in violation of the contract. Kyle interjects, the dog never went to a kill shelter. Every shelter has a facility for euthanization. Here’s some news for Kyle too. When no-kill shelters get overbooked, they often send dogs on to another shelter, which can be a kill shelter. Dorit says LVP put a disgusting story out; the dog was never in danger being killed. Andy says Teddi went so far in the other direction in the Bahamas, when she said she never lied. We see that clip, and Teddi says at that point, she’d told Dorit. Okay. Maybe Teddi should be a justification coach. Or an accountability-if-you-get-caught coach. She said she’d called Dorit a narcissist, and said bad things. Dorit seems surprised, saying she didn’t say that. All she said was that she’d had impure thoughts. Is Dorit confusing this with a Catholic confession? That also makes it sound like Teddi wanted to sleep with her. Andy says Teddi was still lying to the others, and Teddi says she’s learned her lesson about never speaking in absolutes again. Andy says she was lying about lying, and Teddi says she’s taken ownership. Kyle tells Andy what Teddi meant was that she wasn’t a liar, and prides herself on being an honest person. Because they have to speak for each other now. Teddi says she toyed with it in her head, and knew she was making a mistake.

Andy asks Camille about season two, when LVP wanted her to talk to Taylor. Camille says LVP was concerned about Taylor, but when they went to discuss it, LVP left her to hang. We flash back to all those years ago, when Camille confronted Taylor about her husband abusing her. Boy, what a mess all that turned out to be. Camille says, LVP threw her under the bus. She was drowning with no life raft. This woman likes a metaphor. Andy wonders if John Blizzard should have been fired, and we again go back to season two, where Adrienne’s chef made snarky comments about LVP. In return, at the reunion LVP said she wouldn’t let someone work for her who trashed her friend. Kyle says John Blizzard was doing what he was told to do. Dorit asks, who wouldn’t get reprimanded or fired? Kyle thinks John has a lot of information, and Erika seconds that

Andy says viewers complained that they spent most of the season talking about LVP and Puppygate, maybe strategically to bury their own stories. Tom defaulting on a loan is mentioned, and Erika says, resolved, and they apologized. Andy says Mary in Texas asked about Mauricio scamming someone out of $36 million. Kyle says that’s what the property sold for. It’s a property dispute, but the way it’s worded is damaging. He says Dorit is involved in a lawsuit by her former partner. Dorit says they want a certain amount of money. Andy says, in the Bahamas, a woman was chasing Dorit around. We see a clip of that, although it’s unclear why the woman is following her. She’s got a phone, but we’re too far away to see if she’s recording, trying to get an interview, or what. Andy asks why no one brought anything up, and Kyle says, why? They don’t need to, and didn’t want it to come out and hurt Dorit and PK. Erika says it’s just an accusation. Dorit says the judge ordered mediation, and it’s in the lawyer’s hands, so she can’t discuss the details. Andy brings up a pending issue with a former LVP employee suing her for wrongful termination. He claims she told him to sign John Sessa’s name on checks. LisaR says, isn’t that forgery? Because the attention hasn’t been on her for a hot minute. He asks if LVP would have been open about it if it had happened during the season. Kyle doubts it, but says they wouldn’t have brought it up. Really? I find that hard to believe.

The next topic is the pressure to have a perfect body. We see clips of Erika saying she eats dessert every day, and makes no excuses; Teddi talking about putting on weight, and being told she needed to lose weight for an audition; Kyle talking about her eating disorder; and LisaR’s daughter being allergic to everything, and saying all she cared about was skinniness. Andy asks LisaR what made Amelia go public. LisaR doesn’t know, and didn’t ask. They didn’t realize for a long time, but when they were confronted with how Amelia looked physically, they couldn’t ignore it. Dorit asks if Teddi’s family knew about her issues, and Teddi says someone made a comment at Thanksgiving. She just wanted them to accept her as she was. Andy asks LisaR when the pivotal moment was, and she says when they had the barbecue, He asks what she thinks Harry should have done differently, and LisaR says the therapist told him, STFU. Amelia is healthy at this moment. Recently, someone told her that she didn’t look anorexic, that she wasn’t thin enough, and it’s a big trigger. Andy says LisaR seems defensive if anyone ask if she has issues, and asks if she thinks Amelia picked up anything from her. She says it’s hard to avoid food issues, being in the business, but she’s been the same weight since she was twenty. She’s gone to therapy, and can’t blame herself, but she does. So much shame is involved. Kyle says it was about her kids. She didn’t tell her daughters. Her mom was very open, and it made her uncomfortable, so she went the opposite way, sheltering her kids. She still hasn’t had a full conversation with them. She’s scared. Andy asks Denise about her relationship with food, and she says she can pretty much eat what she wants. She did lose a job though, when casting went off of a paparazzi picture. She says Eloise wasn’t walking yet, and her arms were very lean. It made her self-conscious about leaving the house. You need to look a certain way for the job.

A viewer asks where Erika gets her positive body attitude. Erika says she’s always been thin. This is probably the heaviest she’s been. She knows how to eat, and knows how to lean down. She doesn’t mention that she must burn a lot of calories dancing. Andy says Camille wasn’t 100% secure after she had cancer. How is she feeling now? Camille say, better, but it’s still hard. LisaR says it’s funny how they all have their own thoughts about their bodies, no matter what they look like. Andy says those aren’t the only issues that plagued the women. They were consumed with finding the fountain of youth. According to LVP, Dorit even had a head transplant. We flash back to LVP joking during the lie detector test. Erika says she hates when people ask what work she’s had done. It’s kind of rude. Andy says since the Wives began, common among every franchise was the women chasing the fountain of youth. Erika say they’re judged for it, and it’s the way people ask. Dorit thinks it’s comical, since she’s only had Botox and fillers. Makeup can also do wonders. She makes it clear that she didn’t have a head transplant, but I’d say she needs one, and not because of her looks.

Andy tells us, when LVP left a vacant lot in Kyle’s heart, Teddi moved in, and became Kyle’s new bestie. We see clips of them together. In an interview, Kyle says they’ve grown closer. They so much in common, and make each other laugh. We see more clips. Dorit says, eventually they’re going to morph into one person. We flash back to Dorit saying that Teddi is Kyle’s henchwoman, and has a tendency to insert herself. Andy asks when they went from casual to best friends, and Teddi says they clicked during her first season. We see clips from that, and I start to wonder if they needed this much old footage since they didn’t have enough reunion to cover three episodes. Andy says a viewer thinks they’re co-dependent. Erika asks if they’re a therapist. Kyle says the viewers see them traveling and doing things together. Erika says, Kyle gets to be a big sister. Another viewer thinks it looks like Teddi is crushing on Kyle. Andy reminds Camille that she said their friendship was creepy. Why did she feel that way? She says Teddi seems to be up Kyle’s ass. Teddi points out that Camille asked Kyle to be a bridesmaid, but they don’t hang out. Camille says she’s known Kyle a long time. News flash for Teddi. Many bridesmaids are old friend who don’t necessarily hang out with the bride in the present. Camille says when LVP made an exit, Teddi was right there. Teddi says she knew Kyle before that. Camille says Teddi always cuts off any conversation with Kyle, when she’d like to speak one-on-one. As she’s talking, Teddi cuts her off, and Camille says Teddi made her point. Andy asks Camille why it’s okay for her to interject, and not Teddi, and Camille says, Teddi can be more opinionated when it’s not needed. He asks Dorit how she feels, and she thinks it’s a nice friendship, but she does find you can’t have a conversation with one, without the other inserting themselves.

Andy wants to talk about what led up to Kyle and Teddi’s insisting Erika must be annoyed about LisaR’s impression; Farrahween and the other Erika Jayne. A viewer thinks LisaR’s impression was bad, and LisaR points out that she wasn’t performing; it was a Halloween costume. It was the most fun in a costume she’s had. She felt uncomfortable being in the photo with Kim. We flash back to her giving Kim the finger. Kyle says she thought the real Erika would never do that. Andy says she and Teddi were on the same page, wanting Erika to be upset. We flash back to the dinner where they practically begged Erika to get angry, and she did, but because of them wanting her to. Andy says Teddi didn’t have a dog in the fight, so why was she so upset? Teddi says she wishes she’d let it go, and probably would have, had she been in the right state of mind. By that, I assume she means sober.  LisaR says she wasn’t even there, but she had so much to say. Teddi thinks she internalized it, and thought about how she would take it, then projected that on Erika. Zzzzz…. We flash back to Kyle doing an impression of Teddi, and Andy asks why that was okay. Teddi says they were joking around, but what LisaR did wasn’t a joke. He asks why they thought Erika didn’t want to be around them, and Kyle says she takes Erika’s moods personally, and thinks she did something. Teddi says, there were two mornings in a row. We flash back to both times Erika wore sunglasses at breakfast. Once when she had a hangover, and another time when she was getting a migraine. Erika says what’s funny is, she had the best time. Andy asks the women about an airport Starbucks incident, and Kyle says, Erika was not in a good mood. The guy was taking their order ahead of hers, and Erika snapped at him. Maybe she combined that with the morning thing, and thought Erika didn’t want be around.

Andy asks what LisaR thinks about Kyle saying, sober Rinna is boring. LisaR say she can’t blame Kyle, and Kyle says look at Andy’s baby shower. We see a clip of LisaR dancing on the bar, and she says she can’t be drunk all the time. Andy says Kyle went on to say, sober Erika was even worse. She doesn’t remember saying that, but Andy shows a clip to remind her. Andy also unearths Teddi saying that Erika is fake, and does what she needs to do to make you feel good. I think it’s just the opposite; Erika doesn’t care if you feel good. Erika says by now, Teddi knows her well enough to know she means it. We flash back to when Teddi coined the phrase pretend amnesia. Teddi says she doesn’t remember that conversation, but she’s being accountable. Andy asks if she still thinks Erika is fake. Teddi says, Erika isn’t fake, but those mornings were rough. She was paranoid, and instead of thinking it was something personal with Erika, she assumed Erika was coming for her.

Andy asks Camille’s opinion about LVP not being there. Camille says, she should be there. He asks why Camille thinks she isn’t, and Camille says she thinks LVP is pissed about the Brandi clip. We see Denise and Brandi meeting for drinks, and Denise telling Brandi about LVP possibly leaking the story about Dorit. Camille says Brandi is LVP’s arch enemy <snort!> and she feels betrayed. She felt Denise had her back. Denise says they didn’t meet to talk about her, even though Denise clearly brought up the subject when it was unnecessary. LisaR asks why she didn’t come there and say so. Denise says she’s new and neutral. Andy asks if Camille is still in contact with LVP, and Camille says they texted last week. Andy knows LVP was furious about what Camille said about her teeth, and we flash back to that. Camille says LVP was very upset, reminding her, once it’s out there, it’s out there. We see a clip from Watch What Happens Live, where LVP says Camille should be more concerned about what comes out of her mouth than what’s in LVP’s. Andy asks if Camille thinks LVP would have still invited her to the Vegas opening if she’d known what Camille said. Camille says, no.

Moving on to what Andy calls, Dr. Jekyll and Mrs. Grammer Meyer. He wonders if two faces are better than one. No surprise, we see a bunch of clips. Andy says there were accusations that Camille talks out of both sides of her mouth. He asks if, after seeing the show, there was anything that made Camille understand where they were coming from. Camille says, the way it was put together, yes. Kyle tells Camille that she says one thing to one person, and a different thing to another. She said she was upset about LVP when they were all together, but a different thing to LVP. Camille ask if she can’t feel both ways, and Dorit says, not when they’re contradictory. Camille says she felt terrible about LVP’s brother passing away. Dorit says that has nothing to do with it, and Teddi says Camille can still joke about LVP’s breath. Camille says they all laughed, and Kyle continued with it. Kyle tells her they’ve all said things off-camera, but she’d never out Camille. Camille says they’ve all talked about each other behind each other’s backs. Kyle says, not on camera, and Camille says, hypocrisy at it’s finest. They wanted her to be mad. Kyle says, pick an opinion and stick with it. Don’t go back and forth. Camille says she can have thoughts independent from one another. Kyle says she’s trying to please everyone, and just pissing them off by not standing up. Camille asks what Kyle wants her to stand up for. They want her to jump on the hate train. Dorit says Camille does fine with her own hate train, and Camille calls Dorit fake. Erika thinks Dorit worked hard – Camille interrupts, and says she doesn’t like people who pretend to be something they’re not. She’s been around this town a long time, Dorit just shows up, and there’s something about her. Dorit says Camille is entitled to her opinion. She just asks that Camille be honest about it. Don’t pretend to like her. We see a clip with Camille saying she feels bad about what she’s said, and is glad to be getting to know Dorit. Dorit says there were moments like her wedding, and Camille’s 50th birthday, and Camille says, that was for production. She didn’t really want to invite any of them to the wedding. Andy says she has power over herself, and the others make noises about how she could do what she wanted. Andy says it seemed like Camille went all in about finances and PK. We flash back to Camille talking about PK’s bankruptcy and lawsuit at dinner. Camille says she walked in not knowing the dinner was an ambush. After her assistant had passed away, and they trashed her on the bus. We revisit that, and Camille says don’t come to her wedding, then treat her disrespectfully afterward. She can’t say something nice about LVP without the Witches of Eastwick coming after her.

Kyle says Camille is scared of LVP because of Twitter. She doesn’t want to be bashed. Camille says she can tell Dorit isn’t genuine, and she says what she feels in the moment. Andy suggests the talk about what Camille was saying, and LisaR says she was telling them about how LVP hurt her by not being there. It was bad timing that they saw the magazine article afterward, where Camille said amazing things about her. Camille says the interview was given a week before. Kyle talks over everyone, saying they’re all talking over each other. LisaR says it was a kneejerk reaction to reading the article. Camille says there was nothing in it against them. Kyle says Camille was clear that LVP wasn’t being a friend to her. Camille admits that LVP has been a fair-weather friend. Kyle says LVP never showed, and they left their homes and families to support her, Yeah, it looked like a real hardship. They’d thought she wanted them there. Andy says they showed up; LVP didn’t. Camille says she understands that. Denise asks why she’s so angry; take it down a notch. Camille tells her, shut up, and LisaR says, don’t tell her to shut up. Camille says Denise told her to tell her daughter that she’s an effing liar about Teddi brushing her off. We see a clip where Denise says nothing of the sort, and Teddi says Camille called Denise a bad mother, which didn’t happen either. I wonder if we’re watching the same show. Camille tells Teddi that what she said was she doesn’t curse at her kids. Denise says she does not, but Camille tells her that she said it in the Bahamas when she was drunk. We see another clip (before unseen) where Denise says she screams her head off and doesn’t feel bad afterwards, because it’s the only way the kids listen.

Denise asks what’s wrong with Camille, and tells her that she needs to take a second. This is not good. Andy says Denise went to lunch with Camille, where Camille trash talked everyone. What was going through Denise’s mind? Denise says she was uncomfortable, and Camille says, this is a set-up. She walks off, and her dress is half-off by the time she gets to the dressing room. Denise asks if she’s on something. Camille tells the producer that she did say she cursed at her kids. Denise wonders why Camille is so angry, and Andy says, what set-up? Denise says Camille is effing nuts. Camille says she’s leaving, and calls them nasty bitches.

Next time – Part Three (finally) – Andy talks Camille into coming back, Andy gets a present, Camille says she was hurt by Teddi saying the best part of her wedding was the departure, Denise says Camille is talking out of her ass, Erika tells Denise to stop it, and Dorit says it’s a sad end. It is indeed.

🍛 I’m not even going to start watching Ambitions. Not that it doesn’t look good. It looks fabulous, but my TV plate is so full, I can’t fit another thing. And while I miss my Tyler Perry fix, it’s nice to have a break from the Tuesday programming crunch.

🍕 Someone needs to tell Blue Diamond Almonds that when most people have cravings, it’s not for wasabi and soy sauce. When they make those almonds taste like a box of Godiva chocolates and a pizza, we’ll talk.

🔎 A Crime Almost Solved…

I remember when this happened, and hope they catch the other lowlife.

👀 They Must Be Watching Me…

Because I already am.








July 16, 2019 – Nina Asks Curtis To Triple-Cross Jax, Beverly Hills Begins Reuniting, Other Way Capsule & Gone


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Lulu asks Maxie why Dante shot Peter. Maxie thinks it could have been anyone; he just fired. She tells Lulu, Dante is in trouble. It’s really bad.

Finn asks Peter how he’s feeling. Peter says, about the same. The pain is manageable, and he’s just glad he doesn’t need surgery. Finn says he should be glad he’s alive. He can’t be reckless like that. Peter says, it was an accident, and Finn tells him, try to avoid future accidents, especially ones involving bullets. He’ll tell Anna that Peter will make a full recovery. Peter says he’s not telling Anna anything.

On the phone, Robert says he got a call from the Bureau; something is going on with Peter. He asks if they can meet him at Charlie’s. Julian asks to what does he owe this headache? It’s been a minute. Robert says, not long enough. Kim watches through the window from outside. She takes Oscar’s teddy bear out of her bag, and flashes back to drugging Drew. She walks away.

Curtis asks if Drew has a minute. He has a couple of delicate issues to discuss. He knows the will reading was today, and says he’s sure that was tough. Drew says, it wasn’t fun, but he’d rather not get into it now. Curtis says, no problem, and Drew asks, what else? Curtis wonders who drugged him, and asks if he knew Hayden was on The Haunted Star?

Nina tells Jax that she has good news; excellent news. Ad sales are up in anticipation of their Ava issue. He says with luck readership will increase, and she says, luck has nothing to do with it. She gives the readers what they want. She tells him she’s wrapping it up for the day, and he asks if she’s got a hot date with Valentin. She wonders why he wants her to share information about Valentin, and he says he thought he knew the family. Then Valentin falls out of sky, and inherits everything. He’s curious how Valentin managed it. She says he already knows everything there is to know about her fiancé, doesn’t he?

Ava goes out on the hospital rooftop, and sees tables with candles set up. She calls out for Sibley, who comes up behind Ava, startling her. Sibley asks if she’s ready to contact her daughter. Ava asks why Sibley snuck up on her. Does she want to give Ava a heart attack? Sibley says she got distracted by the view. It’s beautiful, clear, and perfect for channeling. Ava asks if the candles are meant to draw Kiki, but Sibley says the candles will keep them from bumping into each other. She knows Ava paid the guard to let them up there, but if the lights went on, it might draw unwanted attention. Ava asks, what now? Do they just start? Sibley says, after she receives payment. Ava hands over the money, and Sibley says, so let’s contact Kiki.

Lulu tells Maxie that she knew Dante was in trouble, but she had no idea it was this bad. Maxie says she’s sorry, and Lulu asks what she was doing there. Maxie says she called in a favor from her dad, and Lulu asks, why? Maxie says she wanted to tell Dante how much his family needed him. Lulu says Dante is in there for treatment. What the hell was she thinking?

Finn tells Peter that he has to let Anna know. Peter says they both know she’ll drop whatever she’s doing, and race back. Finn says, probably, and Peter says they’re still trying to figure out who they are to each other. They don’t need a mother and son reunion based on a crisis that didn’t happen. Finn doubts Anna would see it that way, and Peter tells Finn, call it what he wants, but he’s not telling her, and as his physician, Finn isn’t either.

Robert asks if Julian is tending bar, but Julian says he owns the joint. Robert says he heard a rumor that Julian was going legit, and Julian says, it’s not a rumor; it’s the truth. Robert remembers putting Julian in the Witness Protection Program, and it wasn’t long before he went back to organized crime. Julian asks if there’s a point to this, and Robert says he knows what Julian is; a killer who could revert to form. Julian says he doesn’t think so. Now he has somebody to be on the straight and narrow for. He tells Robert the first round is on him. He steps away, and Robert orders a bottle of their most expensive scotch.

Kim comes in, and Julian asks how the reading was. She says, hard, and he asks if she wants to talk. She says, maybe later, but first, she needs to tell him that she’s so sorry.

Drew tells Curtis that he doesn’t want talk about it. Curtis says Drew was drugged. Why is he more pissed about it than Drew. Drew says nothing happened. The person responsible realized they were wrong. Let it go. Curtis tells him if he says so. Drew says as head of Aurora security, does Curtis have anything business related to tell him about? Curtis says he wants to warn him. Jax… Hayden walks in, saying they need to talk about firewall protection. Drew is like, what?! When did she get back? More important, why is she in his office? She says she was looking for Curtis. Drew says he runs security there, and asks what her concern is. She says she’s the new CFO of the Aurora print division. Jax hired her. He asks Curtis to give him a minute, and Curtis says he’ll be outside. Hayden tells Drew, let’s get it over with. She works for Jax, and has nothing to do with him. He says ulterior motives are her forte, and asks what she wants now.

Curtis finds Jax, and tells him that his new CFO announced herself to Drew. He might want to do damage control. Jax tells Nina that they’ll talk later.

Finn says Peter was wounded in a WSB facility. Anna is going to find out. Peter says he’ll be recovered by that time. Finn says, that’s not the point. Keeping secrets is a mistake. Peter says, it’s his to make, and Finn is ethically bound to honor it. He can’t disclose any information, even to his fiancé. Finn starts to leave, and says, as fast as Peter and Anna knock down the wall between them, he keeps building it back up. He’s his own worst enemy.

Maxie tells Lulu that she should have thought the plan through, but Lulu says, there never should have been a plan. She shouldn’t have interfered in Dante’s progress. Now it’s obliterated, and he’s back to where he started. Finn comes out, and tells them Peter is up for visitors, and asks them to limit it to one at a time. Maxie tells Lulu to go. Finn asks if Maxie is okay, and she says she’s doing the best she can. He says it’s all any of them can do.

Ava asks Sibley how this works exactly. Sibley says Ava told her the building was important to Kiki. Ava says GH was like her second home. She was in medical school, and worked there part time. They see her memorial plaque from the ledge. Sibley asks if Ava brought something, and Ava gives her a necklace. She says she gave it to Kiki for her high school graduation. She wore it most of the time, even when she was furious with Ava. Sibley explains the difference between channeling and being a medium is. As a medium, she relays the messages around her. Like playing telephone, but the voices are louder. When she’s channeling, she has to open herself to another plane. When Ava speaks to her, she’ll be speaking directly to Kiki, and she might not like everything she hears. Ava says, Kiki wasn’t one to hold back. Sibley says she’ll be speaking directly to her daughter, providing Kiki avails herself of the opportunity. Shall they begin? She takes Ava’s hands, and says she needs total silence and the utmost concentration. She tells Ava to close her eyes, and open her mind. Think of the strongest memory of the relationship. Sibley asks if Kiki is there. She makes some weird movements, and Ava asks if it worked. Sibley breathes hard, and looks at Ava. Ava says, Sibley? and Sibley says, no, mother; it’s me. Ava says, Kiki?

Kim tells Julian that she had a session with Dr. Massey. He asks how it went, and she says it was difficult but she thinks she got some clarity. She told the doctor about what happened with Drew. She couldn’t believe what she was saying. It sounded crazy, like she was talking about someone else. Julian says, it’s her grief, that’s all. She says she was convinced having a child with Drew could fill the void left when Oscar died. She forgot the good things she still had in her life. Dr. Massey had her write them down, and the first thing she wrote was her relationship with him.

Hayden tells Drew that he has every reason not to trust her. He says at least they agree on that. She says her motives shouldn’t impact him or Aurora. They have the same logo on their stationery, but they never need to cross paths. He says he’d planned on building a legacy for his son, and now that Oscar is gone, he’s building it for his daughter. Hayden says, it sounds like Oscar was a great kid. She’s sorry for his loss. Jax comes to the door, and says he sees they’re getting reacquainted.

Nina tells Curtis that Drew must be surprised. Hayden exploited his amnesia, and planned on being his ex-wife. He’s sorry he didn’t tell her. Nina says that’s kind of his thing now. He says, what thing? and she says Jax hiring Hayden isn’t the only secret he’s keeping from his closest friends.

Finn meets Robert at Charlie’s. He tells Robert that Peter is expected to make a full recover. Robert says, Anna will be relieved, but Finn says, she doesn’t know. Peter insisted on keeping it to himself. Is Robert listening to him?

Lulu tells Peter that she’s relieved he’s okay. He says she can talk about Dante if she wants. She says she’s in shock. She still thought he was getting better, when he’s gotten worse. It’s disturbing. He’s sorry she had to learn this way, and she says he’s last person who needs to apologize. She knows it wasn’t his idea. He says, for what it’s worth, Maxie did believe she could bring Dante home to her. Maxie comes in, and Lulu says she needs time with Peter. Got it. She breezes past Maxie. Peter takes Maxie’s hand, and he says, it’s okay. Lulu is just upset. It’s not her fault. She says, yeah; it is.

Laura sees Lulu, and says, it’s okay. Lulu runs to her, and says, it’s not okay.

Ava asks if it’s Kiki, and Sibley/Kiki says, yes, mother; it’s her. Ava wants to believe her, but wonders how she can be sure it’s not some kind of scam. Indicating the necklace, Sibley/Kiki says she wore this a lot, but not the night she was killed. She took it off, and never wore it again after Ava drugged Sasha, and set up Sasha and Griff like they slept together. Ava says, everybody knew that, and Sibley/Kiki says, Ava came to Kelly’s, and she tried to slap Ava, but Ava caught her hand. She’d slapped Ava weeks before, and Ava had said she only gets one. Ava says she has so many questions. There’s so much she needs to say. Most important is, she’s sorry. Sibley/Kiki says she never wants contact again. She never wants to talk to Ava again. I’m wondering why Sibley claimed earlier that Kiki wished she had shown up at the dinner. Kind of contradictory.

Kim tells Julian that she was convinced a baby like Oscar could heal her, and lessen the pain. She didn’t stop to consider the pain she’d be putting him through. For him to walk in on her with Drew… Julian says she doesn’t need to rehash it, but she says she wants to face it, and figure out what’s left. Julian has been her rock, and she’s scared that, after what happened, things have changed forever. Julian says she has a right to feel that way. They have.

Finn tells Robert that he reluctantly has to honor Peter’s wishes. Under HIPPA laws, he can’t tell Anna the details about her son. Robert says he’s all for following the law, but when Anna finds out, she’ll go ballistic. Finn says his hands are tied, but Robert says, his aren’t.

Maxie says Peter could have died. He says, he didn’t. She says she should be thrilled; dancing for joy. He says he’d like to see that, and she tells him, don’t flirt. She’s too upset to appreciate it. She meddled when everyone told her not to. Now Dante is worse off, and the WSB will ship him God knows where. Even if they don’t, he’s not safe to be around Lulu and the kids. He says she cares, and Maxie says she wishes she could turn it off. He says it’s one reason he’s crazy about her, but she doesn’t think Lulu would agree.

Laura tells Lulu that she’s sorry. She had no idea it was that severe. Lulu says, the doctors knew. That’s why they were treating him. Maxie barged in, and ruined everything. Laura says she doesn’t really believe that, does she? and Lulu says, no. Laura says Maxie was misguided, but there’s a silver lining. Lulu finally has the answers to the questions that have been haunting her for months.

Ava says they have so much they need to say to each other, but Sibley/Kiki says, not really. Ava always found new and creative ways hurt her. She’s finally at peace, and does Ava know why? Because Kiki is no longer with her. Ava says she doesn’t mean that. Ryan said Kiki forgave her. Sibley/Kiki asks if Ava’s that desperate for absolution, that she’ll take the word of the man who murdered her. She can’t believe his lies, and take no responsibility for her actions. Ava says they can’t undo what’s done, but can they can move past the pain they caused each other. Kiki inflicted her share of pain too. Sibley/Kiki says Ava will never change. They’re done. Ava says, no, they’re not, but Sibley/Kiki says, yes, they are. Goodbye. Ava says, please wait, but Sibley says, sorry. Kiki is gone. She doesn’t want to talk to Ava anymore. Sibley warned her that she might not like what Kiki had to say. Ava asks if Sibley thinks she can scare her. All of a sudden, Kiki doesn’t want to talk, until she’s charged for a few more sessions. Sibley says, wait; she’s back. Ava laughs, but Sibley says, no. She has a message. Kiki wants to send a message to her sister. She wants Avery to know that she loves and misses her. No matter how she feels about Ava.

Ava asks if there’s anything else. The knife is already lodged in Ava’s heart; she might as well give twist. Sibley says she can’t control what the dead tell her. She and Kiki never met, but obviously she’s still hurting. Ava says it’s probably the most truthful thing Sibley has said all evening. Sibley says, maybe Kiki doesn’t want to talk now, but will eventually. If she rebuffs Ava again, Sibley won’t charge anything. Ava wants Kiki to know she’s changed. Maybe the article in Crimson will do the trick. Sibley says she’s going to clean up now. Ava says, while Sibley is there, there’s somebody else she’d like to contact. There’s someone else she needs to make amends with. She doesn’t have a personal item, but this place was important to him too. His name is Nikolas Cassadine.

Laura says Lulu has been in a holding pattern a long time, wondering if and when Dante would come back. Lulu says now the time is further off. Laura tells her that Dante did say not to wait for him. He must have realized it would be a long time, if ever, before he could come back to her and the kids. Lulu says she was holding out hope that he’d walk in the front door, and everything would go back to normal. Now she knows normal is never going to happen. Laura says at least now she knows she doesn’t have to be in limbo. She can make plans. Lulu says she sounds like Maxie. Laura says, Maxie wanted to help. She botched the landing, but meant well. How does Lulu think she knew to show up? Lulu says Maxie called her. Laura says Maxie knew Lulu needed her. She’s good like that. Maxie sees them.

Robert tells Finn there’s no law preventing him saying he received word on Peter’s condition. Finn says, if Anna shows up, it could backfire, and wreck any progress she and Peter have made in their relationship. God knows Robert doesn’t like Peter, but he doesn’t want to hurt Anna. Robert says he hates it when Finn is right, but it’s the perfect opportunity to bring her home. Isn’t it what Finn wants? Finn says he wants her home more than ever, and Robert says, of course (🍷). His ex is in town.

Drew says he’s not telling Jax how to run his half of the business, but he and Hayden have a complicated history. He thought it was in the past. Hayden says, far in the past. Drew asks if Jax is aware that Hayden was fired from GH for embezzlement. Jax says he is, and Drew asks why he hired her.

Nina says Valentin told her that he hire Curtis sot spy on Jax, and it was his idea Curtis take the position at Aurora. Curtis says he needs the extra money. The medical bills are piling up. Nina says he has options, and he appreciates her offering to pay, but he has to do it on his own. Besides, it’s a temporary gig. Jax is a shark, and he’s bound to find out eventually, but it would help a lot if Nina didn’t tell him herself. She says she has no intention of telling him what Curtis is up to. She has another job in mind for him.

Kim says she understands if Julian wants to break up. He says he doesn’t want to, but she says he told her things changed. He says they can’t go on pretending things are the same. She lost the most important person to her. His feelings haven’t changed. She says, even after Drew? and he says she messed up, but she owned up to it, and she’s trying to do better. He’s messed up plenty. A lot of people are eager to remind him, but he’s not the cut and run type. He stays and fights. She says she won’t run either.

Maxie asks if it’s safe to approach. Lulu says, yeah, and Laura says she’ll let them talk. Maxie sits next to Lulu, and says Lulu was right. She shouldn’t have gone. Lulu says she shouldn’t have snapped. Maxie is just looking out for her, like always. She was just upset that Maxie did what she wished she could have done. She found Dante, and got the answers Lulu needed, even if they’re not the ones she wanted. Maxie says she’s not mad? Lulu says, no, and Maxie says, thank God. She despises fighting with Lulu. Lulu says she’ll need Maxie more than ever to get through the next phase of her life. They hug, and say they love each other.

Finn asks how Robert knows about Hayden, and Robert asks if Finn doesn’t think he does his research. When Finn and Anna started playing house, he had a dossier put together. Finn says, of course (🍷). Robert says, Hayden’s name leapt off the page. He knew she’d resurfaced and was involved with Jax apparently. Finn says apparently Robert thinks she has another agenda. Robert asks, does he? Finn says, with Hayden, anything is possible.

Jax tells Drew that he’s a big believer in second chances. Hayden says she is too. Jax says they all should be. She won’t be doing any finances on Drew’s end; no data, nothing. Drew says, understood, but he’d appreciate it if Jax doesn’t drive Aurora into bankruptcy. Jax says, duly noted. As Jax leaves, Drew tells him to watch his back and his wallet. Hayden walks out with him.

Curtis tells Nina that he’s confused. Nina wants him to pass along the same information about Jax to her that he’s giving to Valentin? She says, but she wants it first. He’ll be triple-crossing Jax. It’s simple. Valentin is leaving her out of the loop, and she needs to be in it. Are they clear? Curtis says, what could go wrong?

Hayden thanks Jax for standing up for her. He wants to be clear. If he’d only hired her as CFO, she’d be out on the street. She says, but she’s not. Why is she there? He says they’re going to keep poking and prodding, and Valentin and his house of cards are going to come tumbling down. Then, they’ll both get what they want.

Ava asks Sibley if there’s anything, but Sibley says, sorry. There could be many explanations, but she can’t feel any presence from the other side. I’m guessing we’ll see a new Nikolas soon.

Tomorrow, Diane has good news, Carly ask if there’s a problem with Dev and Josslyn, and Sonny tells Ava do it again and see what happens.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – The Reunion – Part One

Andy FaceTimes with Anderson Cooper, saying, there’s trouble in Beverly Hills. He tells Anderson that LVP isn’t there, but Camille is. They’re breaking a lot of news today.

There’s the usual schmoozing before air time. Andy welcomes us. Denise is excited for her first reunion, and Kyle says, that’s such a newbie thing to say. He tells Teddi what a difference a year makes. She says her dad told her not to have her boobs hanging out, and Mellencamps don’t cry. Andy says, obviously someone is missing. LVP said she’s skipping the reunion and not returning to the show. He says it brings to mind season three, where Adrienne Maloof didn’t show. We flash back to LVP at the same reunion, saying she thinks that’s a mistake. She should have come and cleared up her mess. Andy says LVP’s final act as a cast member was telling a reporter she’s not showing up. Kyle thinks she gave the interview yesterday, knowing if she didn’t show up, she’d be fired. She asks if Andy thinks she wanted to show up when she and Kim were on the outs. He says LVP had said the objective of a reunion is to reunite, and she had no inclination to reunite with the women who have been harassing her for ten months. Kyle says LVP hasn’t seen them since Denise’s wedding. LisaR says LVP pinched her butt, and they were laughing. We flash back to that.

Andy says a source close to LVP said, she was burned at the stake, nailed to the cross, and stoned by her co-stars. Erika says, get of the cross; we need the wood. I’m not impressed, since she stole that line from Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. Andy tells them a source said LVP always wins. Kyle thinks it’s a mistake for her not to be there. They could have worked it out, even if it meant agreeing to disagree. Dorit says she doesn’t think LVP is capable of that. Andy says she drew a line in the sand, and said she wasn’t caving on the issue. Teddi feels like there’s a chance she’ll show up for dramatics. LisaR says she keeps looking at the door. Andy says he knows Kyle is holding out hope. She’s had LVP’s birthday present since September. Andy says, if she doesn’t come, he’s opening it. Denise asks Kyle why she thinks LVP didn’t show up. Kyle thinks she doesn’t want to face them because she’s been unmasked. She was called out on what happened at Vanderpump Dogs. Why do that to someone you care about? She’s been focusing on the Radar article, so she doesn’t have to talk about what actually happened. Erika says she’s expecting a stunt, and will be fully disappointed if it doesn’t happen. A limo pulls up, trying to make us think LVP decided to show, and Camille gets out, along with friend Kimber.

Andy tells us that LisaR and Harry got in a heated Twitter battle with Nicolette Sheridan about Michael Bolton. LisaR had said Nicolette went off with Michael after a concert. LisaR says Harry was in another city, felt strange, and had to go home. When he got back, he found a love note in the trash. Nicolette had slept with Michael Bolton that night, and without Michael, she wouldn’t be with Harry. Nicolette said it was fake news. LisaR reminds us that Denise’s husband was married to Nicolette. Andy says she’s making a compelling case for Nicolette to be on the show.

Andy says, Denise swears like a trooper, and drinks tequila like the world is not enough, thinking he’s being funny by referring to a couple of her movies. We see clips of her throughout he season. My favorite is when she talks about the women dressing up all the time in an interview, and says they’re lucky she put an effing bra on. Andy is amazed how chill she is, and asks what Charlie’s reaction to the show is. She says he was supportive when she told him that she was doing it, but he hasn’t been super happy about some of the things she’s said. Like the time she talked about having one of his ladies of the night to Thanksgiving. Denise says, she was lovely, and we flash back to that story, and Denise saying, even a hooker deserves have Thanksgiving dinner. She told Charlie she didn’t think his past was a secret, and he’d said he was in a different place now. She told him people love him because he’s honest, and his ladies were a big part of his past.

Andy asks Erika about Denise’s laid back sense of style, and Erika says, everyone should be themselves. Denise says she dresses up, but day-to-day, she’s a jeans, tank top, and T-shirt person. She considered the shorts she wore in the Bahamas fancy. A viewer says she’s been through a lot, but never seems like a victim. How is she so good at hanging with crazy? Denise says Charlie is her daughters dad, and they’ve been divorced for fourteen years. She didn’t want her daughters privy to the negative in his life. When he was diagnosed with HIV, they didn’t know. She moved into his neighborhood, and he knew he could call her any time, and she’d be there. A lot of people judged her for that, but she wanted him to be the best dad he could be because she has an amazing relationship with her father. She’s no saint, and she’s made mistakes, but she thinks it’s best not to talk negatively about her children’s father. Ultimately, they’re the ones who suffer. Andy asks LisaR about Denise, since they’ve been friends since the earth cooled. LisaR says Denise is a saint, and she has a lot of respect for her, dealing with a difficult time being so public. Denise says, it was just a snippet of what was really going on. Andy says it struck him that Denise could have taken Charlie to the cleaners. She says they had no prenup, and he got Two and a Half Men while they were married. Andy says she could have asked for a piece, since he had ownership. Denise adds, he made a lot of money. Andy asks how Aaron gets along with Charlie, and Denise says, they do get along. Out of respect, Aaron called Charlie to let him know when they were getting married.

Andy asks about Eloise, and Denise says she has a chromosome disorder that caused delays in speech and development. Erika asks how old Eloise was when they found out, and Denise says it was about two years ago; she’s eight now. She says it’s difficult to diagnose, and it was hard to see it in black and white when she saw the medical report. She tears up, saying, a two-year-old can talk, but Eloise can’t, even though she wants to. She’s a free spirit and happy. She doesn’t know. Andy asks what Eloise has taught her, and Denise says, you can communicate without verbally speaking. Eloise is a bright light. When she hears music, she dances, and doesn’t care who’s watching. Denise has to keep an eye on her 24/7 though. She’s taken swim lessons since she was a toddler, but wouldn’t be able to save herself. Dorit says, it’s hard to hear, since Jagger was a delayed speaker. He’s five now, and did reach milestones. She understands. As a mother, your biggest job is to protect and take care of your kids. Denise says, kids are mean, and it starts young. Dorit says Denise is a great mom.

Andy says, chaos and anxiety follow Kyle wherever she goes. We see clips of her life, and her saying she always feels her life is like whack-a-mole, which I totally understand. She has an anxiety disorder, and automatically imagines the worst. Sarah from Colorado asks if LisaR regrets taking Kyle along on her mammogram, since she suffered so much anxiety, but LisaR says, no. She thinks everyone should have one. She says she got positive feedback, but then people were saying Kyle’s appointment was possibly set up for the show. Kyle says she gets one every October, and was scheduled for the following week. Since both of them were expected, the doctor put time aside for Kyle, so she figured she might as well do it, since they give the results on the spot. A viewer asks if Dorit’s gigantic breast implants affect her mammograms. Dorit asks if they’ve seen gigantic. I agree. They’re always falling out, but I wouldn’t say they’re gigantic. Andy says LisaR said it was like a check-up for her implants. LisaR says she also gets an ultrasound. We see a clip of the doctor saying there’s no sign of a leak or rupture. LisaR says she wondered if it was okay to show it, but it’s the absolute truth. You need to be more careful when you have implants.

Andy asks Teddi how she helped Kyle when she was spiraling. Teddi says they actually went to her therapist together, and we see a clip of them. It’s not like talk therapy though. More like some kind of relaxation therapy. Kyle says her anxiety got so bad, Mauricio almost had to call 911.

Andy reminds us that Erika had toasted, all hail the true queen, Kyle. Erika says look at them today. Kyle is the queen. She says look who showed up. Dorit says Kyle is one of the originals, and the leader of the group. Erika says Kyle binds them, and Kyle thanks them. I watch her head get bigger.

In the hallway, Camille tells Kimber, it’s like walking into the lion’s den with these women. Everyone greets her all fake happy. Andy says an original Housewife is back. Camille doesn’t know if she should be happy or terrified. Andy congratulates her on the wedding, and we flash back to that. Andy says he wants what Mauricio had at dinner in Hawaii. So does everyone else, me included. We flash back to Mauricio wanting to tell a joke, and then forgetting it. Andy says the crew was laughing so hard, they had a problem with the audio. A viewer asks what the best part of Camille’s honeymoon in Switzerland was. She says, everything. She loves skiing, and they did a lot of that. We see photos of Camille’s temporary home, and Andy points out that the house is 1200 square feet. Camille says they’re still in it. It’s got great views, and it’s comfortable. Andy reminds Camille about how she griped about 3500 square feet in NYC. Camille says she thought it would be uncomfortable with two small kids. How times have changed. She went from a grand estate to 3500 square feet. We see clips of that. Andy says he was talking to Denise about raising kids with an ex. Camille says her mother watched Denise’s interviews, and said, that’s the classy way to do it; make it about the kids. Andy asks why she kept the name Grammer, and Camille says, for her kids. Denise says she couldn’t wait to get rid of her married name. Camille says she took the name off of her social media, but it’s still on her passport. Andy asks how David feels about that, and she says, he has no problem; he understands. Andy brings up her reaction to Denise not having a prenup. Camille says she was married for thirteen years. Denise says she was married just under five. I’ll bet it felt like a lot longer though. People think she should have asked for half. He was almost bankrupt before they married. Camille says she felt like she worked hard. She wasn’t sitting around eating bonbons. Dorit asks if Denise likes bonbons, but she says she’s never had one.

10 minutes later. While getting her makeup retouched, Camille says she didn’t expect that. In another room, Denise says wait until they get into Camille’s stuff. She’s already being mean. Camille can’t figure out why Denise is bothered by the money thing. The makeup artist tells Denise, maybe Camille isn’t happy, and Denise is getting laid. Teddi says she has hers scheduled for after this.

Andy tells us just because the women are proper in the streets, doesn’t mean they’re prudes in the sheets. He loves that rhyming stuff. We flash back to all the sex talk this season. Andy tells Denise that viewer Zoe has a question. Denise bets she does. He asks why it was okay for Aaron to get the happy ending, when Denise could do it herself. Denise says she does do that, but he’d never had one, and it was a wild night. Andy said he inferred that she was an old lady. Denise says he was mortified and embarrassed. Andy asks Erika how Tom felt when she said he probably paid for sex as a young man. She says he used to go to Vegas, win money, and the hotel would send up back scratchers. A viewer asks Denise how big is it? and Denise says she only said something once. We go back and count, and it’s like, four. Kyle says compare it to her shoe, and Denise says it’s bigger than that. Andy wants clarification. Denise says he was embarrassed at first, but now he’s glad. Denise asks where Andy falls, and he says nowhere near Aaron. Erika says Denise is the MVP of the group. They discuss her posting a pic online of him at full-mast under the sheets. She says she took it down because the kids saw something. Andy asks how LisaR and Harry keep it spicy after 22 years. She says they like to do some kinky sh*t. #WhatDidHarryDo She says she took a strip class, but all you have to do is bend over. Good to know. Sounds like a lot less work.

We revisit the battle between Teddi and LVP. Like we haven’t seen enough of that. Andy says, from Teddi’s point of view, what happened off camera before the season started? She wants to apologize again first. She should have never gotten involved. Dorit asks why she did. She says she was told that since she wasn’t getting along with Dorit, and LVP was friends with her, it was less weird for her to bring it up, and to figure out a way to make it happen. She was told the dog was in a kill shelter from John Blizzard. She says there was so much going into it; three and four way calls. Denise asks, why get involved? and Teddi says she made a mistake. She was angry at Dorit last year for what happened when they were leaving the reunion. Dorit refused to go to lunch if Teddi was there, and Teddi acted out. Andy doesn’t understand why Teddi didn’t talk to LVP directly. Why was she speaking to the employees? Teddi says she was going there because her kids go to a class nearby. She didn’t hang out with John. Andy says that makes it all the more weird. Teddi says she didn’t think twice, because John said he was talking to LVP. Dorit says it looks bad that she went along; she’s not dismissing Teddi’s bad behavior. Andy reminds them that Erika said Teddi wasn’t to be trusted last season, and we flash back to the previous reunion. Erika says she didn’t realize how much Teddi disliked Dorit.

Andy says for someone who’s the queen of accountability, it’s amzing that Teddi had such a lapse. This is definite shade, and I’m wondering if Andy isn’t just a little pissed that he lost LVP from the Housewives franchise. Dorit says she wondered why, if Teddi didn’t want to go through with it, she didn’t stop it when she was at Vanderpump Dogs. Instead she made Dorit the scapegoat. She thinks it wasn’t that Teddi didn’t want to do it to Dorit, but she didn’t want to be the only one to do it. That hurt.

Next time – Part Two – Andy stirs the pot by asking why the women think Erika doesn’t want to be around them, Camille says they want her to jump on the hate bandwagon. Denise suggests Camille think before she speaks, and Camille walks off.

💍 Another Way To 90…

The Other Way in a nutshell.

👣 A Perfect Fit…

For a gone Tuesday.