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June 22, 2017 – Vacation Day Usurps GH, No Abbey Whales, a Quote & a Vacay Comparison

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Due to someone else’s vacation beyond my control (my husband), I wasn’t able to recap GH today, but I did see most of the last half hour, walking in on a tender moment between Spencer and Nina. Here are a few takeaway points.

Spencer admitted that it’s not really his inheritance he’s upset about, but the loss of his father. He and Nina had a sweet conversation where Nina comforted him. Laura and Doc showed up, and Laura sat Spencer down for a talk. She confiscated his phone, and told him that they need to let the law take its course. This caused a light bulb to go on over Spencer’s head, and he told her Valentin isn’t going to know what hit him. Maybe he’s going to hire Diane.

Molly met Aunt Stella, who said she missed so much of TJ’s life, she didn’t even know he had a girlfriend. Molly misunderstood and let slip that Shawn is TJ’s father. This caused Stella to march down to the PCPD and confront Jordan. Now everyone knows that Shawn is TJ’s father.

Sam let Jason know what’s going on with her, but later told Molly she thinks she’s going crazy. Molly talked her down, but Sonny came to Sam in another vision, telling her that Jason is still his.

In Puerto Rico, Carly beat the pants off of Sonny at poker. When she decided to go out for some air, she opened the door to find Garvy/Kirby/Carney (the latter according to another recap), or whatever his name is, at the door.

Tomorrow, Curtis tells Stella to leave Jordan alone, Sonny goes after Garvey/Gravy, and Sam wants to head to Puerto Rico.

🍺 Although I can’t actually stomach watching it, I caught an E-News article and film clip about What Happens at The Abbey. Chris called Erin a whale, which didn’t go over too big (no pun intended) with any of the cast. Even sadder was how she told him that his opinion was meaningless, but then howled about how she’s a size two over and over. Now she’s hardly a whale, and when a man says something like that, it’s usually about control, but she’s a size two like I am, depending on the vanity size. Back when I was in my 20s, some guy called me fat when I called him on his driving skills. Rather than get bothered by this jerk, I simply said that I was not fat. He was majorly startled, probably because 1) he’d expected I cared what he thought, and 2) most women would take his comment to heart. Then, after stuttering for a moment, he admitted I was right, and that I wasn’t fat. D-bag.

Something to Ponder…

…the best way to deal with speech we dislike is not to restrict it or quarantine it. Rather, it is to combat it, challenge it, to question it, and to expose precisely what it is about such speech that is erroneous.Zachary Wood, a student, speaking to the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education.

Like a Pinterest Fail

The vacation in my head

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The vacation in reality

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June 21, 2017 – a Bump in the Puerto Rican Night, Ramona in a Ponytail, Chef Battles & Rearview Mirrors

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Laura, Doc, and Spencer go to Kelly’s. Spencer says it’s kind of Doc to accommodate him, but he still wants what he had at Windemere. He thinks Charlotte should be embarrassed to call Valentin her father.

Lulu and Charlotte bring Dante’s phone to the station. Charlotte says it looks like the same place where Valentin made the video. Lulu says it is, and Charlotte wonders why, since he’s not a policeman.

Quinn tells Nathan and Amy that pictures are the best sales tool they have. She says traffic on the website spiked as soon as his picture went up. They want to approach the book the same way.  His eyes command attention, and attention turns to sales. Nathan says they can’t use his picture.

Jason leaves another message for Sonny, but gets cut off. My mistake, it’s not Kirby; it’s Garvey who’s after Sonny. I can’t help it if he’s one of those interchangeable characters who looks like a Kirby.

Carly and Sonny get caught in the rain. She wants to put something dry on, but he tells her she looks great as is.

Quinn says a new author like Nathan is in no position to make demands. Amy says he doesn’t think of himself as an author, just a typical guy giving advice. People feel more comfortable approaching him from behind a keyboard. Quinn says his face is the book, but Nathan says it’s about offering people sound guidance. She says no picture, no publisher; his face is the brand.

Nina gives Nelle some instructions. She says it’s a lot of work because they’re so backed up, but if an article holds Nelle’s interest, bring it to her attention. Nina notices a bracelet Nelle has on that Charlotte made out of macaroni. She has one too.

Dante sits Charlotte on his desk. He asks if she remembers what happened at the Nurses Ball. She says everyone was scared. Lulu says Valentin had to answer some questions about it, so he made the video there too. Dante says there are other people who have questions, and he went to answer them. Charlotte says then he’ll come back like he promised.

Jason thinks he should call Max, but Sam isn’t too sure. Jason is having enough trouble convincing them he’s out of the business. Michael knocks on the door. He has paperwork for Jason; they’re reorganizing the family trust. Jason tells him that Sonny’s phone keeps dropping out of service. Michael says that he and Carly are in Puerto Rico, and to try the landline. He asks if it’s important, and Jason says it could be.

Sonny makes a fire, and the rain is REALLY LOUD. So LOUD, I can barely hear them. Lightning strikes, and Carly jumps into Sonny’s arms. She says sorry, it seemed so close. The electricity goes out, but he says the storm shouldn’t last too long. She reminds him of when they were trapped for four days, and he said it was only going to be a couple of hours. She says it was one of her favorite times there. She lights some candles, and he talks about the time they taught the boys to play poker. She says that Sonny almost folded to let Morgan win.

Nathan tells Quinn that he appreciates the meeting, and Amy asks to confer with her client. In the hallway, Nathan tells Amy that he wants to help, but he can’t let her put his face on the book. Amy says she has a fix, but he says he can’t do his job with people thinking he’s an advice columnist. She asks him to let her try and save the deal. He says as long as his face doesn’t end up on a book cover. Amy tells Quinn they’ll do the photo shoot.

Spencer asks if anyone has been back to Windemere, but Laura wants to talk about something more pleasant. Spencer wants to address the issue of his stolen inheritance, but she says it wasn’t stolen. Doc explains about the will, and how the estate went to Valentin. Spencer lost his claim when Stavros died. They didn’t realize it, but it’s always belonged to Valentin. Spencer asks why Valentin didn’t claim it before, and Laura says it was only made known after Helena died. He asks what happens if Valentin goes to prison, and Laura tells him that Nina will probably decide.

Nina says she keeps telling herself it’s for the best; Lulu is Charlotte’s biological mother, and it might confuse her. Nelle says that isn’t true. She got to see the family up close, and Charlotte adores her. Nina says she did, but she’s living with Lulu now. Nelle thinks it’s best for Nina to stay in Charlotte’s life; there’s nothing confusing about a mom and a stepmom. Nina says Lulu wouldn’t be happy with it, but Nelle says Charlotte’s happiness is more important than Lulu’s comfort level.

Jason tells Michael that an old associate might be coming after Sonny. Michael wonders why Julian would say anything, and Sam says he claims that he’s trying to be better person, even though they don’t believe it. Michael says he’ll give Max the guy’s name, and have him tighten security. Jason asks if he’s sure that’s all. Michael promises that he’s not going anywhere near his father’s business, but that brings him to other reason he’s here. He asks if Jason wants to join him at ELQ.

Carly and Sonny drink to the best hurricane he can remember. She tells Sonny that he makes strong drinks, and he says they just have to relax and wait out the storm. She says it’s better than waiting at the airport. They both hear some noise outside, and Carly asks, what’s that? Sonny tells her to stay there and he’ll check.

Amy tells Quinn that they’ll do the shoot on Nathan’s terms. They’re not to show his face full to the camera. They want to preserve the mystery, so he’s in a shadow and only one eye is shown. Quinn says the customer needs a reason to pick up the book in the first place, and Amy says, exactly. A man’s face is in the shadow, with one brilliant blue eye showing; it makes them curious pick up the book, and it’s sold. Quinn says they’ll do it her way.

Lulu says there are new things Charlotte is getting used to, like thinking of them as family. Charlotte says papa and Nina are family too. Lulu says he had to go away, and truthfully, none of them know when he’s coming back, but she has plenty of people who love her. Charlotte says sometimes Spencer isn’t nice, and Lulu says that Charlotte can always come to her.

Nina looks at the family photo on her desk. Nelle comes into the office, and says she found something Nina might like. It’s a backstage account of a fashion show from an anonymous dresser. Nina likes a new point of view, and says she’ll read it. She asks Nelle to pick up a quinoa/kale salad that Kelly’s makes special for her, and tells Nelle to get lunch for herself too.

Michael talks about sustainable energy sources getting pushed back from Ned, and how he needs someone to get accurate feedback on the profitability. He tells Jason that there’s a lot of travel involved. Jason says he has no experience, but Michael says he’s a problem solver. When going over qualifications for a project manager, he realized Jason would be perfect.

Carly picks up a fireplace poker, and almost hits Sonny. He says good thing he checked. An intruder is outside, and it’s no one she wants to mess with. I’m thinking it’s a racoon or something.

Michael needs someone he can trust, and can’t think of anyone better, but Jason says it’s not the right time. He says Michael will need him to be away, and he’s been away enough. Sam says they can make it work. Michael gets a text from Nelle wanting to meet at Kelly’s, and he replies that he’s on his way. Sam asks if there’s a time limit, and Michael tells her the middle of next month. She asks if they can think about it for a couple of days, and he says okay, but needs to fill the position asap. He leaves, and Jason asks if she’s trying to get rid of him. Sam says that she wants him to have a challenge not involving Sonny

Carly says that parrot is still here? It’s Tito, the mean escape artist parrot. She asks if he’s okay with a rogue parrot that scared her to death, and tries to bite the guests. Sonny asks why she’s so jumpy.

Jason didn’t realize that Sam was still worried about Sonny. She says he seems fixated on warning him, and turned Michael down without even thinking about it. She wonders if he’s worried that he’ll be away if something happens to Sonny.

Quinn says once contracts are signed, they’ll schedule the photo shoot. She thinks it has mass appeal, and Man Landers is compelling. She’s overnighting the contracts. In the hallway, Amy is thrilled. She thinks the mystery man thing works for them, and thanks Nathan for trusting her and not walking out. She says it’s a huge deal for her and her brother, and hugs him.

Spencer asks what Nina has to do with it; a virtual stranger gets to decide the fate of Windemere? Laura says Valentin’s team of lawyers are probably hashing it out, and he asks if it wasn’t Shakespeare who said kill all the lawyers? He goes to bathroom, and Laura tells Doc that she was hoping boarding school would reign in his behavior. Doc says it helps create distance between him and his grief, and he keeps control with things as they were. Laura thanks him, and he says it’s been a blessing. They’ve fulfilled his life in ways he never imagined. They kiss.

Michael asks Nelle what the good news is, and she tells him about the job at Crimson. She says he was right. The bird pooping on her shoulder might have been good luck, and she thinks things are turning around.

Amy understands what an imposition it is, and how Nathan isn’t comfortable, but Nathan says he’s glad to help. She says Chet would do the same in his position, because he’s a good person. He says he’s doing it for her.

Michael asks how Nelle decided on fashion publication, and Nelle says it decided on her. She thinks it’s going to be a good fit. Michael says they have to celebrate. She says she’s just there to pick up lunch. He says ELQ is sponsoring a concert in park, and asks her to go with him.

Sam says she’d know Jason was safe if he worked for Michael. He says he’ll be right here, and not overseas working for Sonny or troubleshooting for ELQ. He says he doesn’t regret leaving Sonny’s business. He says he’s worried though, and wants to fly down. She says he can’t

Sonny tells Carly to relax. She says everywhere she looks, she sees the boys and goes over memories. She says the four of them were together, and there was enough time for everything. Sonny says time ran out. They look sadly at each other.

Nathan asks if Charlotte is joining the PCPD, but Lulu says they’re headed to Lila’s Kids. Dante says thanks for the phone, and asks how Nathan is.

Nelle asks if it’s a date, and Michael asks if they’re allowed. She says yes, and tells him she’ll see him later.

Doc thinks Spencer’s been gone a long time, and goes to check. Nelle says hello to Laura, and asks how Charlotte is. Laura says she’s enjoying Lila’s Kids, especially the arts and crafts. Doc comes back, saying that Spencer is gone.

Spencer walks into Nina’s office. He asks if he’s addressing Nina Reeves or Nina Cassadine, and says they need to talk.

Sam says Jason claimed he didn’t want to be part of the business. He says he just wants Sonny to know there’s a threat. Sam says she’s coming with him.

Carly tells Sonny that she sees Morgan everywhere on the island, and the worst thing that could happen really happened. Sonny says their son is gone. Carly says that no matter how happy you are, it’s just a moment that can disappear. He tells her thinking that way robs them of what they have right now. he says maybe they can be happy again. They kiss. Someone lurks in the shadows.

Tomorrow, Laura looks for Spencer, Jordan wants to cool things off with Curtis, and Sam isn’t letting Jason out of her sight.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Carole meets Tinsley for breakfast. Tinsley says her mother is coming to town, and accompanying her to look for apartments. They talk about going to the NY Botanical Garden Winter Wonderland Ball, and Carole looks up the pictures online, using her phone. Tinsley is happy to be in the press for something good. She says she’s glad to be back in the swing of things, and that she’s still going to counseling for what happened to her. Carole says she should redefine herself, starting with cutting her hair. In her interview, Carole says reinvention is not repetition. Tinsley says she’s not changing her look or her life.

Sonja packs for her trip, while Frenchie makes hors d’oevres. He’s going to be spending part of his time in Paris. Sonja says she doesn’t like when he walks in on her in the bathroom, and he tells her she should close the door. She says Tinsley keeps saying she’s leaving, but she wants to make sure that Tinsley is comfortable back in the city first. Sonja talks to Frenchie about how the girls are gossiping. Frenchie says he doesn’t like that they make a bigger deal out of Rocco than he is. In her interview, Sonja says she has a good time with Rocco, and until she doesn’t, she’s going to see him.

Ramona facetimes with Ashley. She’s proud of herself for redecorating without a decorator. I had to do that after we had a flood, and didn’t think it was that huge of an accomplishment. She’s having a sort of housewarming party, and invited Bethenny, wanting to bridge the gap. Ashley thinks she should give it space, and then try to straighten it out for the sake of their play friend group.

Tinsley and realtor friend Chris meet with her mother, Dale. Chris shows them a four-bedroom, two-bathroom apartment that’s only nine grand a month. Tinsley says her mother has no idea what downtown is, and thinks Manhattan is only the Upper East Side. They move on.

Carole’s friend/interior designer, John, arrives. She wants to get her 60-year-old couch recovered. She dumps fabric swatches out of a tote bag. John thinks cat-friendly is the way to go. Adam shows up, and Carole gives him some of the stuff he left behind. In her interview, she says things are going much better now that Adam has moved out, since she lives in a tiny apartment. Her definition of tiny being different from mine. The disagree over who owns a Buddha head. Omg, this is so high school.

Dale is much more approving of the next apartment. It is pretty impressive, and also nine thousand a month. Chris thinks it’s more bang for her buck and much more “her.” Tinsley is afraid of moving too fast, but won’t feel like she’s really back until she has her own place. She starts to get teary, and Dale suggests staying at a hotel. The apartment has its own elevator, and I want to cry.

Frederik visits Bethenny’s loft, and says that it smells cleaner. We flash back to him telling her it’s too cluttered. He thinks it looks a lot better and you can breathe now. He says get rid of the bar and they’ll get five and a quarter (million). Bethenny has spent a lot on the bar, and is concerned about it breaking if they try to move it.

Carole calls Dorinda, asking if she’s packed for Washington, where they’re going to protest at the Women’s March. They’re leaving in the morning. Carole is taking her lucky monkey.

Sonja meets Rocco at a bar and bakery. He tells her that Frank Sinatra practically lived there. In her interview, Sonja says she’s between a Rocco and a hard place. Since Frenchie knows about Rocco, she now has to tell Rocco about Frenchie. Rocco has had the place closed so that they can have dinner privately. They discuss Tom, and Rocco says he cheated when he was young. Sonja starts to stammer, and tells him about taking a complete stranger home one night. She thought he was going back to Paris, but now he’s smitten with her. She dances around the fact that he’s moved in. She tells Rocco that there aren’t any more guys in her life like either one of them. If I didn’t know what she was saying, I would have no idea what she was saying. Rocco says anyone can have sex, but friendship is important. In her interview, Sonja says Frenchie is possibly an infatuation, while Rocco is in it for the long haul. Rocco asks where she thinks it’s going with them, and Sonja answers without answering. They toast to the next kiss.

Dorinda and Carole march. We see lots of pink hats. Dorinda’s daughter, Hannah, joins them as well. Carole says she wants to hold this administration accountable, and feels they’re standing on the right side of history. Dorinda feels like a better person for being involved, and says this is huge. Hannah is proud to be a woman. It’s all well and good, but sounds like the Occupy Wall Street thing, where the protesters never really said what they were protesting about. Today’s word for this whole episode is, vague.

Tinsley wants to get rid of the tattoo of her husband’s initials, and her friend Anika says she didn’t even take her ex’s last name. Ha-ha! Ramona gets ready for her party. She has a cool flat screen TV where a non-Yule log is burning. Carole thinks Ramona is more traditional than the apartment reflects, and that she’s sporting an I Dream of Jeannie vibe. Dale compliments Ramona on her high ponytail. Dorinda presents her with a candle. Harry arrives. Ramona thinks she’s the only one he hasn’t dated. He asks about Sonja, who’s late. Tinsley has known him forever, but wouldn’t touch him with a ten-foot pole. He makes inappropriate comments and follows her.

Sonja blows in. She’s not drinking again, and goes the other way when she sees Harry. Too late; he’s seen her. She tells him she’s turned a new leaf, and he’s in Paris. Everyone makes small talk. Luann is happy that everyone is happy for her and Tom. She assumes Bethenny isn’t coming, and Dorinda says that Ramona and Bethenny aren’t talking. Ramona says she did invite Bethenny, but she RSVP’d she wasn’t coming. In her interview, Ramona thinks the RSVP is a step forward. Carole suggest that Ramona call or text privately, but Ramona wanted to show there were no hard feelings – even though Bethenny was “as bad as [she] was.” Here comes that backhand. She tells Carole she doesn’t remember exactly what she said, and Carole tells her that she’d had too much to drink. Dorinda says she uses alcohol as an excuse all the time. Ha-ha! Ramona says she loves Bethenny, and does want to apologize. Harry bugs Sonja.

Ramona says she wasn’t really thinking when she made up the guest list. Missy, who’d thought she was dating Tom and walked in on him with Luann, is there. Tom tells Luann that Missy is happy for them. In her interview, Luann says it’s healthy to be friends with your exes. Harry pumps Missy for the deets, but she doesn’t want to talk about it. Dorinda vogues. Sonja says that Ramona is a pot stirrer, like we didn’t know, and that Ramona has been telling her what everything cost. They hear something crash in another room, and Sonja calls out, $12.99!

Next time, Bethenny wants to go snowboarding, Tinsley goes to therapy, and Dorinda comes for Sonja at yet another dinner fail.

🍲 On MasterChef, lifeguards were fed, but I was left with the question of wth is a purple green bean? If it’s purple, how can it be green? I have to admit to being a little happy when contestant Jennifer’s pork was undercooked. She’s a debt collector who claims her job is stressful, but I’ll bet it’s not nearly as stressful as it is for the people she hounds. Gordon basically said she let a setback cause her to “disintegrate.” Sadly, the balcony got polled, and she got to stay. She seems like a real jerk who can barely form a sentence, so there’s hope for more mistakes.

🎣 The challenge teams on The f Word were Slaw & Order (cops from Peachtree, GA – a gorgeous town) vs the The Food Bosses (a family who moved from the big city to a simpler life in rural TN). They made a New York strip steak with a dry rub, sautéed mushrooms, and potatoes. Andy Cohen had a cook-off with Gordon, and although I missed what they were cooking, Andy burned it. He doesn’t exactly strike me as the chef type. More like a Seamless customer. Joel McKale did some grilling, and Gordon did some scuba diving. He caught and cooked some spiky Caribbean pest fish that don’t belong in Islamorada, Florida, but make a tasty meal. Leslie Jones (love her! and she looks fantastic!) discussed grits and other food with Gordon. She also did a guess-the-food game, and we’ve all been forewarned that we probably don’t want to eat durian fruit. Or grasshoppers.

Gordon periodically checks with the diners about the team challenge, and I laughed when one said the potatoes were like something he’d make in the middle of the night when he was drunk. Personally, that’s when I prefer a can of Chef Boyardee anything. On Father’s Day, Gordon and daughter Mathilda challenged the world record holders, the McCurdys, for the number of eggs cracked with one hand. No shells in the glass, and one hand behind the back. I might be good for two or three. Maybe one. The McCurdys kept their title, bringing up their total as well. The Food Bosses won the challenge by a narrow margin. Next week, Gordon goes undercover again, and on a lake trip.

⌛ Andy Cohen: Then & Now brought us Being Rich: the 80s tonight, and how those spending habits then affect us now. Erika Girardi explained that money only brings out who you really are – if you’re a poor a-hole, you’ll be a rich a-hole. Mega-mansions; Donald Trump’s golden penthouse; the Playboy mansion (purchased in the 70s for one million), which Mauricio Umansky just sold for $100 million to Hugh Hefner’s neighbor, under the proviso that Hugh gets to live there in perpetuity, which is a scary thought; and Lisa Vanderpump’s Villa Rosa (Giggy’s house!). They’ve downsized since then, but she told us that as long as she and Ken have their own bathrooms, they’ll stay married. I understand. Kyle Richards said that today it’s all about the “smart house,” but I say no thanks. I’ve read Ray Bradbury’s short stories. A parade of amazing weddings came next. Carson Kressley weighed in on the topic, and I noticed he was wearing some seriously distressed jeans with a nice sportcoat, tie and pocket square. Shame on him. Larry Fortensky, the first trophy husband, is discussed, and it’s pointed out that while lavish weddings were once the thing, now it’s secret weddings a la Adele or Branjelina. Body maintenance was kept a secret in the 80s, but not really. One of Andy’s guests suggested that one day we’ll be able to download our soul into the cloud, and I almost fell off my chair laughing. Pre-nups! The Cat Lady! Who, btw, got billions in alimony, with the caveat that she can’t use any of it on plastic surgery. Greed is good, and Silicon Valley rich vs hedge fund rich. Bill Gates is worth $86 billion today, just in case you were wondering. Private jets, limos and yachts, and Robin Leach revealing that the most outrageous limo had a landing pad, hot tub, and a putting green. It was all about exclusivity and excess. Ah, the good old days. I miss them, and I’ll miss this show, as it’s the season finale. I love a good retrospective.

RearviewMirror

June 20, 2017 – GH Gets an AMC Addition, Rose is on the Warpath, Adam Redeems His Chef Title & a Coupla Thoughts

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Alexis sees Julian at the MetroCourt. She says she was looking for him. She tells him that Olivia-F has agreed to maintain the status quo. He says that’s good, but Alexis is surprised at his lack of reaction, and asks what’s on his mind.

Amy is a wreck. Nathan says he can tell, and not to make a big deal about it in her head. She says the publishing of the book is contingent on meeting Man Landers. He says he’s there, and she can do all the talking. She thanks him for stepping up when he didn’t have to. She doesn’t know how she’ll repay him. She throws her arms around him and they hug. Nina sees them.

Nelle asks a waitress if Kelly’s is hiring. She needs some steady income, and asks how long she’ll have to wait to find out if she’s hired. Bobbie pops out of nowhere, and says when hell freezes over.

Josslyn tells Michael that he’s the sanest person in the family next to her father, and asks if Carly is getting back together with Sonny.

In Puerto Rico, Sonny and Carly wait for the distributor. Sonny says he must be running on island time, and asks if she’d like to join him for breakfast.

Jason comes home and sees that Sam is awake. She asks how long she was out, and he says probably about ten hours. He tells her that she’s been operating on no sleep whatsoever, and she says she’s feeling better. She takes the knife out of her boot when he goes to the kitchen.

Amy says if they want Nathan’s real name, chalk it up to mystique. She says his suit is missing something, and takes a pocket square out of her purse, telling him it brings out the color of his eyes. Nina joins them, saying he’s looking sharp. She wants to know if Nathan wants to catch up, and he tells Amy he’ll meet her. Nina wonders what he’s been up to. It’s been difficult for her at work, finding a replacement for Maxie, and must be really difficult for him. He asks what’s with the hint dropping, and she asks what’s up with him and Amy.

Bobbie says Nelle will get a job there over her dead body; she’s co-owner. Nelle thought she was a nurse, and Bobbie says she has a lot of irons in the fire, so Nelle won’t be getting a job there. Nelle says she’ll look elsewhere. She knows Bobbie hates her and why, and asks if it’s now Bobbie’s life mission to destroy hers. Bobbie says go back to Atlanta, and she’ll wish her well. Nobody wants her in Port Charles.

Michael tells Josslyn that Sonny and Carly are on the island, since there was a problem with liquor distributor. Josslyn is like, please. She told Carly it was just a story, and got her phone confiscated and sent to her room for her trouble. Michael says that Carly is the mom, Josslyn is the kid, and she can’t police her mother. Josslyn says so she’s off to Puerto Rico with the man she’s supposed to be divorcing. She says that Michael is too smart to believe it. Sonny is going to try and get her back. Michael asks if that would be so bad. Josslyn says after what he did to her dad, she never wants to live under the same roof as him again.

Sonny tells Carly that no matter how it shakes out, she’s always welcome there; it’s her place too. She says the memories are enough. They toast with their coffee to good memories.

Alexis says maybe Julian’s visitation can be increased. He tells her that he needs to get back to the office, and promises they’ll talk soon. When she leaves, he approaches a guy at the bar. The guy, Kirby, says that Julian isn’t returning his phone calls. Julian says he’s out on bail, and things are hectic. Kirby says, not so fast, old friend.

Sam recalls getting into bed with the knife. Jason asks what she wants for breakfast, and then asks why she’s holding a knife. She says she found it on the coffee table, and Jason thinks he left it there. She says she feels a lot better and her head feels clearer, and apologizes for acting strange. Jason says no problem, and promises no more surprises or lack of communication.

Nina tells Nathan that she doesn’t want to pry, and that Amy is right about the pop of color bringing out his eyes. He says that he’s just doing a favor, and it’s nothing she needs to worry about. He says he’s not having an affair. He loves Maxie, but does have somewhere he has to go.

Nelle tells Bobbie she’ll stay out of her way if Bobbie stays out of hers. Bobbie says she has  better idea; Nelle should stay away from Michael. It’s sad that she can’t tell difference between affection and pity. Nelle flashes back to what Michael told her; how it wasn’t pity he felt. She tells Bobbie to forget she said anything, and starts to leave, but Bobbie grabs her arm. Nelle tells her to get off, and Nina comes in, asking if there’s  problem.

Josslyn talks to Michael about what a creep Sonny is, and how he’s affected Carly. She wants Carly to hate Sonny as much as she does. She tells Michael to talk to her and tell her to build a wall around her heart that Sonny can’t get past. Michael says it’s not up to them if she decides to forgive Sonny. Josslyn says she never will.

Carly tells Sonny that she can feel her blood pressure dropping, it’s so relaxing. Sonny gets a call. He says they’re staying there tonight.

Julian says that Kirby knows where all the bodies are buried, but Kirby says he’d never roll over on anyone, and his problem has more to do with tactics on the west coast. Julian tells Kirby to cut to the chase. Kirby says they want same thing – Sonny out of the picture for good.

Amy coaches Nathan. He tells her it’s going to be okay and take a deep breath. It’s Marian Colby! (Actually, it’s Jennifer Bassey playing new character Quinn Danvers.) Quinn says Amy must be the voice behind Man Landers, and Amy says she’s his manager. Quinn tells him that she’s a fan. Advice columns are a balancing act between sensitive and macho, and he’s impressive for a newcomer. Amy says he’s shy in person. Quinn says this isn’t a book tour, just a casual conversation, and wants Man Landers to speak for himself.

Nelle says she was just leaving, and Bobbie says not soon enough. She has to take a call, and suggests Nelle not be there when she gets back. Nelle thanks Nina. Nina doesn’t like to see someone getting kicked while they’re down. Nelle says she deserves it, and Nina asks why she’s choosing to stay in Port Charles.

Josslyn tells Michael not to act like he’s never been mad at Sonny. Michael says that the older he gets, he realizes that everything isn’t black and white. He forgives Sonny because he’s family. In life, people have disagreements, and if the both of them went at it, he’d never cut her out of his life. He tells her that nothing can change family, and they hug.

Kirby isn’t kidding around; it’s time for Sonny to go. Julian says that Kirby has a good thing going on the west coast. He should learn from his mistakes, and leave Sonny’s territory alone. His brother went up against Sonny’s associates, and it didn’t end well. Julian says the business comes with a risk, and he wouldn’t do anything unprovoked. Kirby talks about Ava, thinking Sonny has something to do with it, and they both have reason for payback. They should team up and make him an example. Julian says he has no reason to get involved. He’s out on bail and under surveillance; if he gets caught up in it, he’ll just get caught, and he wants something better for his future.

Sonny tells Carly that the distributor won’t be there until after 5 pm, so they can’t settle the problem until the morning. He says they can have dinner, and he can have the staff fix up a room for her. Carly accuses him of setting the whole thing up.

Quinn says she has high hopes for big sales. Man Landers’s writing speaks to the everyman demographic. It’s witty, insightful, and relatable, with enough flair to hold the reader’s attention. Nathan knows more than Amy thought, and is able to quote himself.

Kirby says that Julian doesn’t get to walk away. Julian says he’s the exception to the rule, and even if he wanted back in, who’d risk doing business with him? It’s better for them both if he doesn’t get involved. Kirby says he’ll take care of Sonny himself, but won’t forget Julian’s lack of solidarity. After he leaves, Alexis, who’s been lurking around, says that sounded intense. She came back because Julian was acting odd. She asks if he was expecting Kirby, and Julian says he’s been trying to avoid him. Alexis heard enough to know that Kirby is targeting Sonny.

Carly says she knows every move in Sonny’s repertoire. Sonny says she’s the owner; he doesn’t have any strings to pull. He tells her to call the distributor at 5:30, and she can double-check.

Sam tells Jason that moving forward, she’s not going to let her exhaustion spiral out of control since they have a tribe of babysitters. There’s a knock at the door. It’s Julian. Jason says it’s not a good time, but Julian asks Jason to hear him out; it’s important.

Carly tells Sonny she’s free for the night, and sorry for what she said. This place meant a lot to her, and she knew it would ignite memories. She didn’t want to miss what used to be. Sonny says they’re getting divorced, but it doesn’t mean they won’t be in each other’s lives or that she’s not important to him.

Bobbie runs to Michael, telling him that Nelle has no plans to leave, and she can’t help thinking he’s the reason. Nelle might have misconstrued his sympathy. He asks if she told Nelle that, and Bobbie says it’s typical of her to play victim; she’s working an agenda. Michael says that if Bobbie is right, it’s his mistake to make.

Nelle tells Nina she doesn’t want to go back to Florida or Atlanta. Nina asks what about somewhere else, but Nelle says it won’t matter without a job. Nina says she’ll give Nelle a good reference, but Nelle says it makes more sense financially to stay. Nina says Michael is the reason she’s staying, and Nelle says maybe, but it won’t matter unless she gets job. Nina tells her that she might have an alternative. It’s been chaotic since Maxie left. She has an assistant, but needs an office manager. She asks if Nelle is up for it.

Quinn takes a call in the other room. Nathan tells Amy he figured he should read up on her advice. He says that she’s a strong, compelling writer, but too bad she has to hide. She tells him again that men won’t take advice form a woman. He doesn’t like taking credit for her, but she says he’s doing her the favor of a lifetime, and the charade won’t be for much longer. Quinn walks in and asks what charade?

Jason invites Julian in. Julian appreciates Jason being protective. He tells them that Kirby wants Sonny eliminated.

Amy tells Quinn that she wasn’t talking about a literal charade, but everything is hypothetical until the contract is signed. Quinn says that she’s been given the green light for the book deal. Once the contract is finalized, they’ll have plenty of support, but first they need to have a photo shoot. She says that Nathan is a real gift from the publication gods; they’ll sell a lot of books with his picture.

Nelle says she feels that she’s qualified, but is Nina sure? Nina says it would make her life easier, and she feels like she owes Nelle. She clearly didn’t want to spy on Valentin, and Nina has regrets. She wants a chance to make it better. Nelle accepts the job.

Bobbie says that Michael is an adult, capable of making his own decisions, but as his grandmother, she’s always going to worry about him and give her opinion. It’s up to him whether he listens. He says that’s fair enough, and she says he’s like his mother – and her; he insists on making his own choices. He tells her that he’ll live with the consequences, and for the record, nothing has happened yet. Bobbie says, famous last words. Yep. Along with, watch this! She leaves, and Josslyn says he’s doing the same thing with Nelle that Carly is doing with Sonny. Michael says he can say all he wants, but Carly isn’t going to listen; she has to figure out for herself. Josslyn says she thinks he’s wrong and a possible hypocrite, but thanks for talking. Outside, she calls her friend Trina, saying that she has the house to herself tonight, so they can have some people over. That should be good.

Carly tells Sonny that it means a lot to her that they can be civil and respect each other. She says since they don’t have to work, she’s going to sit by the pool. He suggests a walk by the ocean.

Sam asks Julian why not go to Sonny? Julian says that Max probably has orders to shoot him on site. Jason wonders if it’s a trap. He tells them to ask Alexis; she was there. They can tell Sonny or not, but he thought they should know. He leaves, and Jason thinks he should call Sonny. Sam wonders if Julian is telling the truth, and Jason says, what if he is?

Carly tells Sonny, why not? Sonny says he’ll meet her outside. He misses Jason’s call.

Tomorrow, Quinn says no pictures no publication, Nelle thinks Charlotte should stay in Nina’s life, and there’s a mystery in Puerto Rico.

The Haves and the Have Nots

When we last left, Quincy Jr. had been shot. Benny says they have to get him to a hospital, but Hannah tells him that it’s too late. Someone yells to call for an ambulance. Benny tells Quincy Jr. that they’re getting him help, but I think we’re past that.

Jeffrey sees that Melissa has cut her wrists. He calls 911, and screams at her why did she do this? He gets some towels, and tries to stop the bleeding. He yells for his mother. He asks Melissa about her mother, and she says she’s just like his. He tells her that he doesn’t hate her, but she’s fading fast. He runs to Veronica’s room. She tells him she’s trying to sleep, and to put some bass in his voice. She sees blood on him, and wakes up quickly. He tells her it’s Melissa, and Veronica thinks she lost the baby. When she sees what’s going on, she tells Melissa that if she loses the baby, she’ll kill her herself, calling her a dumb bitch. She asks Jeffrey what he did. He says her dad died. Veronica said he was going to die anyway, and screams at Melissa that people die. Jeffrey tells her to shut up, and calls 911 again. She keeps smacking Melissa, and when Jeffrey tells her to stop it, claims she’s trying to save Melissa’s life. She tells Jeffrey the call is being recorded, and to shut up. He tells her not to hit Melissa again. Veronica tells Melissa that if she dies, she’ll make her family’s life a living hell. Jeffrey wants to stop the bleeding, and Veronica goes to get gloves. We hear the sirens, and he tells Veronica to go open the door.

Candace goes to Erica’s hotel room. Erica says she doesn’t have any money, and Candace says she knows. Erica is surprised that Candace didn’t get any marks tonight. She says the Presidential candidate Charles Frederickson is staying there, and David knows him. She thought Candace was staying at the Fountain Drop, but Candace says she’s staying in the same hotel that Erica is. Erica says David might be coming back, and Candace gives her the room number she’s in. She fixed the door so it stayed open after the guest left, and says she probably has until housekeeping comes. She gets a call from Benny, but she doesn’t answer.

Candace asks how it’s going with David, and Erica says it’s going. Candace asks if they’ve had sex yet, and Erica says they did, and under that suit is the body of an athlete. Candace says here she is with nothing again, and she’s been here before. Erica tells her no looking back, and Canace says she had millions. Erica says Candace is her girl, and she can borrow what she likes. While Candace looks in the closet, Erica texts War, telling him Candace is there. War tells her about the shootout, and that Quincy Jr. Is dead. He says let him know where Candace is in a couple of hours. Candace picks out a dress, and Erica says she was just texting good-night to David. Candace asks if she’s falling in love with him, but Erica says she’s not.

Erica asks if Candace is going to talk to Benny, but she says no. If Erica needs her, call the Batphone. I swear that’s what she said. Erica wants a hug, and Candace says she’ll call later. Erica asks if she wants to stay in her room for old time’s sake. Candace says she’ll call. I think she’s picking up a weird vibe.

Oscar sees David at the bar. He says it’s been a long night, and David says him too. Neither one of them want to talk about it, but David says maybe after a drink. Oscar thanks him for the Jim referral. He’s looking for Jim’s son. He asks if Wyatt is gay, since it gets a man to trust him easier, and David says no, but he has a mean drug problem. He says he thinks he blew it with Erica and pushed too hard. He didn’t do anything; they both decided not to, but suddenly she asked him to stop when they were making out. Oscar says she’s good, and David asks what he means. He says either it got too much for her to handle, or she didn’t like it, but David doesn’t think that’s it. Oscar says she could also be setting him up. David thinks Oscar has spent too much time with Candace. Oscar says that David is probably moving too fast, and to watch his heart. David says that’s not the part of his anatomy that needs attention. Oscar says he’s been able to get a lot of fortunes after a divorce, and sex is the quickest way to his heart; he needs to take his time. David gets a text from Erica saying she hopes he made it home safe. Oscar tells him to ride it out for tonight. Let her wonder where his head is. David doesn’t want to play games, but Oscar says there are new rules. David tells Oscar that he’s old school.

Jim arrives at the bar. David wonders what Candace is doing here, and Jim says probably doing what she does best. Jim says David is the only one in the room who hasn’t slept with her, and calls her over. She says, isn’t this predictable? Jim asks how she is, and she says as good as she looks. He tells her hiding isn’t her style, and David says maybe avoiding prison is; there’s a warrant out for her arrest. He says as an officer of the court he could do it, and there’s much joking about handcuffs. Jim says the photos are in possession of the police, and announces that Candace also killed Quincy and buried him in her backyard. David says that’s not very smart. Jim talks about nosy neighbor Pearl, and says there are cameras everywhere. Oscar asks what Quincy looks like, and Candace says he looks like the one who beat his ass before he ran out the door. She tells David that Jeffrey helped her. David doesn’t believe it. Jim asks to talk to Candace alone. Candace says she doesn’t think David will call the police until he checks in with his son.

Jim says he misses Candace. He asks if she has a room there, and she says no. He suggests they go to her place, and she asks if he means the one he foreclosed on. He knows she has nothing left, and asks if it was worth it. She says it was fun, and he asks who she’s blackmailing now. He tells her that he wants her, and she says he wants to trap her. He tells her to get over her suspicion, and holds out a drink. He says that he won; take the martini. She says she doesn’t want it or him. They banter a bit, and he keeps telling her to take the martini, reminding me of Ruth Gordon in Rosemary’s Baby for some reason. Candace says she has to go. Jim says he’ll be at the bar.

David calls Jeffrey and leaves a message to call him immediately.

Benny and Hannah sit in the hospital waiting room. Benny asks for the phone. He goes to make a call while Hannah sits dejected. Benny calls Kathryn. She asks what’s wrong and where’s Hannah? He says they need help; they’re at the hospital. He starts to cry, and says his nephew died. She asks how, and Benny tells her that he was shot. Kathryn asks what hospital, and says she’s on her way. He thanks her.

At Wyatt’s place, the interventionists can’t figure out why the detox isn’t working. They want to take him to the hospital, but he doesn’t want to go. They get him up and out.

Benny tries to give Hannah some water, but she doesn’t want it. She says they killed him. He had it hard, and she tried to give him a better life. Benny tells her not to get upset, but she doesn’t know how she can’t be. She says Candace doesn’t get it. It’s a cycle that just keeps going around and around, and getting worse and worse. She says there’s a loop, and it’s all going to come back around. She was trying to stop it before it was too late, and now he’s dead. She calls out to Jesus. Benny suggests they pray. He reminds her of a prayer she used to say with him. She says she can’t pray, and he tells her not to say that. He says let’s go back, but she says she can’t go back there. I think the room is probably going to be a crime scene for a while anyway. He tells her to stay there; he’s going to handle a few things.

Mitch shows up, and Benny starts to cry. Mitch tells him to be cool, and not let his mom see him. Rose appears with her crew. Mitch says it wasn’t supposed to be like this. It wasn’t supposed to happen. Rose wants to know who shot at him, and Benny says it was War, and tells her where he is. Rose tells someone on the phone to put DA Jennifer’s body in the trunk of War’s car, and let all hell break loose. They have to send a message that it’s never right to go after a Malone.

Veronica asks if Jeffrey heard anything about the baby. He says he doesn’t know anything. Veronica goes to the desk, but the nurse says the doctor is with patients. Veronica says the only important patient is the one carrying her unborn grandchild. The nurse says she’ll page him when he’s done. Veronica says it would be a shame to spend all those years in nursing school to ask if you want fries with that. She tells the nurse that she wants to see a doctor within three minutes. She boots a lady out of the seat next to Jeffrey, and then boots her out of the next one she tries to sit in, saying it’s a private conversation. Jeffrey says she just can’t not be a bitch. She says he’s trying to be one. He says Melissa tried to kill herself because of Veronica. Veronica says don’t blame her; she didn’t hold the blade. She reminds him that she’s his attorney.

Veronica calls her maid, Rosita, saying that even though she has the day off, she has to come in or risk her job. Or she could come tonight. Melissa had an accident, and she needs the house around it cleaned. She says she doesn’t care about the bus. She tells Jeffrey it’s not her problem if Rosita has to get a bus at 4 am. That’s probably going to be another crime scene. For a bunch of people who are all involved in law somehow, no one ever thinks of that.

David calls Jeffrey. Jeffrey says he’s at the hospital and explains. David asks if Veronica is behind it, and Jeffrey says he knows it. David says he’s on his way, but Jeffrey says she’s here. David says he has to talk to Jeffrey in person. Veronica asks what he wants, and Jeffrey says he was just checking up on him. Veronica asks if he’s coming, and when Jeffrey says he is, she says that’s good. She checks herself out in her compact, and complains about the bags under her eyes. Jeffrey says she has no sympathy at all, and she says no, she doesn’t. At least you know where you are with this sociopath.

Suddenly, Kathryn is standing in front of Veronica.

Next time, Oscar wants Candace to be his partner, Rose tells Jim that she wants to send a clear message, and Kathryn comforts Hannah. It looks like a great season to come with “twisted, tantalizing Tyler.”

Below Deck Mediterranean

I hope no onions are involved with this charter.

Adam leaves the dinner on the crew’s night off, and Malia follows Adam back to the boat because they’re both middle schoolers. Hannah asks where Adam went, and I laugh when Bugs says that he went “home.” I guess it is when you’re on charter. Max says that killed the vibe, and Wes no longer wants to know Malia.

Omg, Malia and Adam talk like something out of a bad romance novel. You came all the way back just for me? We might be connecting on a level that’s surpassing the yacht relationship. Gag. She asks if he wants to party, and he says he’s a good bartender. She asks if he’s going to put onions in it, and I have to admit that’s pretty funny.

Hannah and Lauren talk about Bugs. Hannah says ever since Adam made the comment that Bugs should be chief stew, she hasn’t said a word. They go outside for a smoke. Hannah talks about having Bugs’s back when her grandmother died, and now she has nothing in return. Lauren says she hopes to be half the chief stew Hannah is one day. Hannah says she’ll always have Lauren’s back.

Adam kisses Malia as fireworks literally go off. Now we’re in a Hallmark movie. She knows everyone will be talking, but doesn’t care. Oh, you will. The others head back to the boat. Malia and Adam pretend to be eating in the galley. Adam sneaks more kisses. Wes says she chose the d*ck. Yep. He tells Bobby they all got played. In his interview, he says he has a crush on Malia, but he feels for Wes, pointing out that Adam is the one who just jeopardized their tip.

Bugs tells Hannah she hopes Hannah sorted out what she needed to. Max tells Bobby that he deserves better. Everyone turns in.

We flash back to Captain Sandy calling out Adam. He says he’s definitely on her radar now. Wes thinks maybe he misread signals. He talks to Bugs about Hannah. She doesn’t think it’s right how Hannah is treating her, because she isn’t the one who said anything, even if she thinks it. Wes says he’s there for her.

The captain goes over the new preference sheets. Primary guest Jason has recently left his finance career, and is considered one of the most eligible bachelors in Dallas. Hannah thinks he’ll be d-bag central and they’ll all be high maintenance. They’ve requested a Cuban dinner, and a white party with a 7-course meal, each dish representing a different color. Why? Who knows. Captain Sandy says all eyes are on Adam, especially hers. Ha-ha!

Bugs asks Hannah if they’re good. In her interview, Bugs says she’s not good with unresolved feelings, and thinks they should hash it out and move forward. Hannah says that she didn’t like the situation with Adam, and Bugs says it wasn’t cool. She didn’t think it was right, and he was unprofessional. She wanted to leave it behind, but felt excluded at the crew dinner. Hannah says Adam has been going at her all season, and since Bugs and Adam seem to have a friendly relationship, it was easier for her to chat with Lauren. In her interview, Hannah calls girl code. Bugs says she supports Hannah, and has her back. Hannah hopes the next charter goes more smoothly.

The crew readies the yacht. Adam asks to talk to Hannah. He says he owes her an apology. She says more than anything, she was bothered by what he said to Bugs because it diminishes her rank. In his interview, it’s dawned on Adam that this is his job, and he needs to make amends. Hannah doesn’t really trust him, but tells him she’s good, and they hug it out.

The guests arrive. The girls are stunned by Jason’s beauty, but IMO he’s no Marc Singer. Hannah does the tour thing. She’s trying to figure out the romance situation, hoping none of the women are with Jason. The captain calls Malia to the bridge, and tells her she’s going to take the boat off the dock. In her interview, Malia says she’s always wanted to outrank her brother, who’s a military captain.

Hannah tells Adam the primary isn’t a d-bag. That will teach her to judge a guest by his headshot. Wes and Malia work together. Wes is tempted, but in his interview, says first time, shame on you, and you know the rest. Bobby is hoping he gets a chance to take the boat off the dock, and likes how the captain lets them be involved. Malia likes how Captain Sandy puts them in situations where they can fail. She’s nervous, but the captain guides her through. Success!

Geez, Jason is a nice guy, offering to help Hannah. Adam is relieved to be chopping onions, but Captain Sandy just wants him to stay focused on his job. In his interview, Max talks about the last stern tie being a fail, and hopes this one works out better. It goes well, and the captain says they keep improving. Hannah goes over the schedule with the guests. She’s excited for the Cuban theme party, since she was just there. I want to go!

One of the ladies offers Bobby a cocktail, but he can only wish. Wes goofs around with Malia. Why? Hannah welcomes a Cuban musician on board. The crew sets up the party in a cove. The stews discuss Jason. Hannah says they can’t go there with charter guests, but if anyone could tempt her, it would be him. The guests shove off for the party.

Pictures are taken while they still have light. Hannah gives everyone shots, and Jason says she’s a mind reader. At the yacht, Max talks to his girlfriend on the phone, and asks when she’s coming to see him. We see photos, and they’re a cute couple. Ooh, the cove is nice in candlelight. The deckhands carry the female guests to the return boat, and Jason jokes about Hannah carrying him. Adam prepares dinner, and hopes nothing gets sent back.

Max’s girlfriend is coming on Tuesday. He suggests a double date with Malia and… somebody. The female guests check out the galley, and they’re thrilled when Bobby walks through, letting him know that one of them is single. In his interview, he says cougars are flirting with him right and left, but he can’t get a flirt out of Malia. Dinner is served, and all goes well.

After dinner, Jason asks Hannah to join them for a drink, but she says she can’t. He tells her if she’s scared just say so. The guests want to look at the crew’s quarters and the crew mess (where the crew eats, not the mess in their quarters), although I’m not sure why, since it’s an imposition. Bobby says he’s scared of Tina, who must be the single one. He says that the cougar wants the cub, but not vice versa. The guests move on to the hot tub.

Hannah brings the guests drinks. Jason gets his phone wet, and she offers to put it in rice, but he believes it’s beyond saving. In her interview, she says he’s got a great body, and there’s nothing wrong with a 40-year-old having a 20-year old’s body, and the bank account of a 70-year-old. Or something like that. She chats with Jason on the deck while having a smoke, and he asks her questions about yachting. In her interview, Bugs thinks it’s unheard of and unacceptable for a chief stew to be flirting with a charter guest, and she’s dumbfounded. Maybe just dumb. It’s not like they were acting inappropriately.

I am so fascinated with Croatia. And so wish I could go on one of these charters. It looks heavenly – the scenery, the food, the everything. Although getting there is not half the fun. Love traveling; hate the process. The guests go ashore, and Adam starts preparing the 7-course meal. The deckhands play with helium, which never gets old. Captain Sandy goes over alternatives for the guests who don’t like seafood with Adam. This has to be embarrassing. It’s pretty bad when the captain feels the need to go over the menu with the chef. Lauren feels like she’s in the middle of Hannah and Bugs, who are both giving her orders.

Hanna goes over the schedule with Bugs. Hannah is going for a nap, and in her interview, Bugs thinks that’s unacceptable too, and tells us that she’d never do that before a guest party. Hmm… I’m seeing how this one could become a problem. Adam should have kept his mouth shut.

The dinner table décor is amazing – white balloons, crystal, pearls, other white stuff, appetizers in fancy spoons. The appetizer doesn’t even sound like something I’d like, since it involves fennel, but I’d eat ten of them. Jason is impressed with the details, and tells Hannah that they weren’t expecting anything so amazing. The different colored courses turn out to be fun. One course is seared tuna, with beets for the non-seafood people. Now we’re talking my language. In the galley, Hannah asks Bugs if they’re good, and Bugs says they are, but her face says something different. Jason is also impressed with the food. The scales are officially tipping in Adam’s favor.

Two of the guests don’t eat pork, and one whispers to Bugs that she’d like a chicken breast instead. Hannah says the guest doesn’t know how to write, and Adam is concerned about his redemption night. He makes the chicken, claiming he’s never saying no again. The same guest, who Hannah calls “Plastic Fantastic,” bitches about the salt in one of the dishes. Lauren tells Hannah that she’s getting frustrated, and feels like she has two chief stews. Hannah says it’s her fault for giving Bugs too much power. The guests compliment the chef, and Adam hopes this is a step forward. Hannah has a shot with the guests, which bugs Bugs.

The guests start to turn in. Hannah runs after Jason and…

Next time, Adam tells Hannah she’s not perfect, Bugs outs Hannah texting a guest, Max’s girlfriend arrives, Wes kisses Malia (shame me twice, shame on me), and it’s revealed that Adam hooked up with Malia before the show.

🏝 Well, what did I say? Apparently, the producers of Bachelor in Paradise have found no wrongdoing on the part of any contestant. Like that cop after the Tawana Brawley scandal, DeMario Jackson must be wondering where he goes to get his reputation back.

☮ Just a thought. Instead of attacking every fart Donald Trump blows, we should be going after the real enemy. Ourselves.

Pogo

June 18, 2017 – What Happened to Daniel, a Little TV Tea & My Favorite Canine Papa

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

Fear the Walking Dead

We look out over a bunch of cities from the top of a cliff. A lone zombie wanders the highway. Wait, it’s not a zombie – it’s Daniel. He’s desperate for water, but there’s none to be found. He shuffles behind a truck, hiding from a mini-horde of zombies. The last one turns and sees him. They shuffle at the same pace, Daniel not too far ahead. He hides under a car, but she pulls at his leg. A dog distracts her. Daniel quietly freaks.

Daniel can hear the zombie skulking around as he hides. He sees a pair of boots, and the zombie is taken down. He’s pulled out from under the car. A guy tells him to relax. He sees a wound on Daniel’s leg. Daniel says it had him, but let him go. The guy introduces himself as Efrain, and tells Daniel that he’s dying. Daniel yells for water. Efrain says the good news is that he has water and is happy to share it; the bad news is that they have to walk. He helps Daniel up.

They go into a building and Efrain shuts the gate. It looks like a warehouse flea market. Efrain leads Daniel to a fountain, but it’s dry. He asks where the water is, and Efrain says it shouldn’t be long. The word agua is heard repeatedly over a loudspeaker, and water begins to pour from the spout. Daniel drinks, and Efrain fills a jug. He says every week at this same time, a little miracle. He puts the jug on his bike and peddles away through the zombies, with Daniel in a cart at the front. Daniel is like, hey stairs! but Efrain drives his bike right up them. He’s got a stick for errant zombies, but doesn’t need it.

Efrain drives into an alley where several people are gathered. Daniel keels over, and they hide behind a dumpster. A truck goes by, crowded with men looking around. Someone in the group says that they’re coming by more often now.

Efrain discusses Daniel’s wound with a woman named Lola, who thinks that Daniel could possibly lose his leg. Daniel mumbles about a horse, and Lola asks if he’s a Broncos fan. The wound has to be scraped. Daniel says it take a steady hand, and Lola tells him to try not to scream. Efrain gives him some booze, and Lola sings. Daniel sings with her. She scrapes the wound, and it’s painful just to watch.

Fast forward, and Daniel and Efrain are scavenging. Daniel looks through a photo album. Efrain knocks down a zombie, and tells him to hurry up. Efrain gives the zombie Last Rites before finishing it off. Daniel asks if Efrain was a priest, and Efrain says he’s been many things and he found his calling. He pulls out a flask, and takes a drink, offering it to Daniel. They toddle off with the cart.

Efrain takes Daniel to where he lives, saying all are welcome. He shares some food. Daniel says he’s been kind. He didn’t have to help him, but he did. Daniel asks when he last had a professional haircut, and styles Efrain’s hair. Efrain says it’s been a while since he saw himself, and thanks Daniel. He asks when Daniel is going to sneak out. He knows running when he sees it, and something worse than Daniel’s leg is rotting in him. Daniel says he’s a bad guy, and he pays his debts. He’s killed ninety-six people. Efrain says that’s not it though. They share a bottle of liquor, and Daniel tells Efrain about leaving El Salvador, and how he never told his daughter about his past. Efrain says the burden was his, and asks if Danial is looking for his daughter. Daniel nods.

He tells Efrain that they were in a house surrounded by death, and he was trying to protect her, but his mind wasn’t right. He woke up in a fire, and could hear her calling. He was trapped, and burning, and the ceiling was collapsing. Somehow, he got out, but then he collapsed. When he came to, no one was left alive. Efrain asks what he’s saying. Daniel says he doesn’t know if he burned his daughter alive, and to forgive him. Efrain isn’t so sure forgiveness is his to bestow. He half-hugs Daniel, and tells him to take it easy. He says the good news is, there’s nobody left in this world to judge him; the bad news… he nods off. Daniel covers him with a blanket and jets.

Daniel travels down the highway with a lantern. He pops a zombie in the head with a shovel, sending it into the canal. He tries for another, but loses his weapon. Great. He opens his arms and awaits his fate. The zombie falls, but so does he, with his feet dangling in the current.

Daniel watches some clean-up guys do a coin toss to see who gets to clean the sewer pipe he’s in. They pull out some bodies smushed together with a carpet of leaves and laugh. Daniel rises from the leaves, and I’m surprised neither one of them has a heart attack. They take him to an office and discuss what to do, afraid that they’ll get nailed for sneaking him in. Lola walks in, and says she knows who he is, and they did the right thing in hiding him.

Lola explains that Daniel is at the Gonzalez Dam. Daniel asks why they’re hogging the water when people are dying of thirst? Lola tells him that there’s a new boss making decisions, the President of Tijuana. Daniel asks how much control she has, and she tells him that he never met her before today. He came there looking for a job. A guy breezes in, asking what Daniel is doing there, and Lola tells Daniel that he’s J.C., head of security. She says she hired Daniel because they need more help; they don’t want dead bodies building up in the water system.  J.C. suggests that he discuss this with the boss, but Lola tells him his job is security, hers is water treatment. Let her do her job, and go do his. He nods, and leaves. Daniel is impressed.

Daniel is now on the clean-up crew. He looks at the trucks, and asks another worker if he doesn’t have a problem with the distribution of water. The worker says it’s either get eaten, shot, or work. What’s it gonna be?

It’s dinnertime, and Daniel has an entire can of SPAM on his plate. Unappetizing to say the least. The big boss, Mr. Dante, comes in, and everyone stands up except Daniel. Dante tells everyone to sit, and they go back to eating. J.C. asks Daniel why he didn’t stand, and Daniel says he didn’t know he was supposed to. J.C. says, well, he is, and he’s also supposed to look at J.C. when he’s talking to him. J.C. leans over and puts his middle finger in the middle of Daniel’s SPAM. Daniel stabs him with his fork, and J.C. draws his gun. Dante comes back and asks what’s going on. J.C. whines that he was stabbed, but Daniel says he was just eating. Dante asks what his name is and where he’s from. Daniel tells him, and Dante wonders if he’s Sergeant and NCO Salazar. He looks at the tattoo in Daniel’s mouth. He says, Sombra Nega, which I googled, and it’s a name for El Salvadorian death squad groups. Dante tells J.C. that he needs to read more. He’s picking a fight with a CIA trained killer. He asks how many communists Daniel killed, and Daniel says he lost count. Dante tells everyone that they have a guest, and leads Daniel away.

Daniel questions the way Dante is using the dam, and Dante tells him that it might be the apocalypse, but it’s not communism. He asks what Daniel wants and needs, and says to speak freely. Danial asks if Dante can lend him a jeep; he’s looking for someone. Dante says sure, but his talents deserve more. If Daniel works for him, he’ll give him something befitting of his stature. He holds out his hand.

Daniel is on a truck, looking for a thief. It’s the same kind of truck Efrain and his friends were hiding from. Daniels sees where Efrain lives but says nothing. The truck busts into the warehouse where Daniel got the water. The fountain is dry, and Daniel still says nothing. J.C. says, nothing there, and Daniel looks at the clock. Sh*t. They’re going past the fountain right when it turns on. Sh*t. The water starts to drip, and Daniel panics. The agua announcement is made, but Daniel creates a distraction, saying he found something. He points and says, there’s your thief.

Daniel tells Lola that he had to; they were going to find the fountain. She says he saved Daniel’s life. He says first they’ll find Efrain, and then her; then they’ll both be killed. He did it to protect her. Lola tells him that if she stops running the water, the people will die. Not from bites or gunshots, but of thirst. Daniel says if they find her, there won’t be anything he can do. She says Dante is right; he’s perfect for this place. He tells her to do what she wants, but he warned her, adding not to save people who are already dead.

Daniel sees the guy he pointed out being beaten. He’s taken to a cell, and Daniel brings him a canteen of water. It’s Victor, and we’re back to the ending of last week’s episode. He tells Victor that he said he’d be his guardian angel, and Victor says, or angel of death. Victor wonders how Daniel got out, and Daniel asks if Ofelia is alive. Victor says they fled the compound, and they all thought he was dead, but she’s alive. He tells Daniel that Ofelia is holed up in a hotel. It will take a day, maybe less, to get there. He says to get him out, and he’ll take Daniel to her; she’s waiting for him. Daniel just looks at him.

He calls Victor an s.o.b, saying he doesn’t believe Ofelia is waiting for him. Victor says she survived the fire, and Daniel tells him that he’ll says anything to save his life. He tells Victor that this place is perfect for him. He’ll rot there, like the dead. He says Ofelia is dead, her father is dead, and so is Victor. Victor says that Daniel owes him, but Daniel just keeps walking. Interesting.

Dante announces that the expert is here. A circle of men parts, and Efrain looks at Daniel. Dante asks what Daniel needs, and Daniel says just space. He goes up to Efrain, and talks quietly to him. He says that if Efrain talks, they’ll kill him, and then Lola. If he doesn’t talk, Daniel will kill him. All he can offer is to do it as fast as he can. Efrain says those aren’t options, and Daniel asks Efrain to forgive him. Efrain says, again?

Daniel punches Efrain a bunch of times, saying, confess! Daniel tells Dante that he isn’t going to speak, but Dante says he will, and to keep going. Daniel picks up a hammer. Lola says, enough, leave him alone, and runs to Efrain, crying and hugging him. Daniel drops the hammer.

The lot of them are on a very high ledge on the dam, along with a few other people. Dante says to let it be a lesson that when you steal from him, this is what happens.  Daniel takes the first guy out of the line. Dante tells the guy that he just needs a messenger pigeon to tell the others. The guy thinks he’s cheated death somehow, but Dante hoists him over the railing, and down he goes. Next, Daniel chooses Lola. Dante asks if Daniel is ready. When Daniel hesitates, Dante tells J.C. to do it. Daniel shoots J.C., and throws the other henchman over the railing. Dante is all offended, saying he let Daniel in, but he’ll always be a goddam dog. Daniel says nothing, and just shoots him, and I laugh.

Daniel hands Lola the gun, gets on his knees, and asks her to forgive him. He bows his head. She holds out her hand, and he takes it.

Next time, a fire at the ranch, Troy has a calling, and Victor is surrounded.

I knew it. Jesse Borrego is playing Efrain. He was in one of my favorite 80s TV shows, Fame. At the time, I’d decided VCRs were invented just so I could record that show. The tapes are still in the black hole around here somewhere.

#WhereIsOfelia

☎ Better Call Saul is having its season finale on Monday, Jun 19th. You can actually watch too much TV, and I kind of lost track of this show along the way, but it’s very good. It’s clever, and like TV’s hooker with a heart of gold.

🏛 I have no idea why I’d thought The Real Housewives of Potomac was going to give some actual sophistication to the franchise, but I couldn’t have been further off. I definitely think that this bunch is the most focused on money, and comparing who has more of whatever. That makes me wonder if they’re the group with the least amount money. Ashley told us she still needs to work on both her marriage and the restaurant, since passive/aggressive Michael made some changes to the latter while she was in Bermuda. Although when both of them agreed that the marriage was more important in less than five minutes time, I wondered if all this hands-on management was just for storyline. Charisse held an opening for her champagne room, and cut a ribbon, making this the most excessive thing I’ve ever seen on any Wives show. And that includes Heather Dubrow’s skabillion dollar mansion and the birthday party Taylor Armstrong had for her toddler. This week, the girls also had an overabundance of time to spend analyzing why Karen was downsizing her living quarters. Refusing to descend from the cloud that she lives on, when someone pointed out that Karen would no longer be living in Potomac, she told them that was “a matter of opinion.” Funny, I thought it was a matter of zip code. Next time, a Bollywood party where Monique attends appropriating the wrong Indian culture, and wearing a feather headdress.

🍺 It looks like What Happens at the Abbey has been relegated to midnight status. And rightly so. It doesn’t need to be taking up the space of a show that has some genuine direction.

Quote of the Night & One More for the Dads

You don’t mess with a man’s SPAM.Rueben Blades (Daniel, FTWD) on Talking Dead

My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person — he believed in me.Jim Valvano

CaseyInTie (2)

💖 One of my favorite dads, Casey 💖

June 16, 2017 – Sam is Troubled, Cosby is Depressing & Happy Father’s Day!

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Laura says she feels a little in the way. Lulu’s family is now four, and Charlotte needs her own room. Lulu says it’s fine. Spencer blows in, and says the living arrangements are unacceptable, and Charlotte is the problem.

Jake tells Elizabeth she looks scared, like at the Nurses Ball. He wonders if it’s him, but she says everything is fine. He says that she and his father make everything fine for him, and they hug. Hey, where is Franco these days?

Hayden runs to the examining room, unlocks it, and runs to the bathroom past Elizabeth and Jake.

Doc sees Sam at the MetroCourt. Jason is late and it’s bothering her. She has a weird feeling.

A cop comes to the examining room door, but Elizabeth tells him that it’s just her sister. He says to make sure she locks the door. Hayden comes back out and says hi.

Up On the rooftop reindeer’s paws. Costa tells Jason it’s not his job to ask questions, and it was never Jason’s either. They can kill each other or walk away. He jumps down to the balcony, and slams Jason up against the doors, but Jason quickly gets the better of him. Jason says Helena is dead, so who is Costa working for?

Amy says Nathan eavesdropped, and it’s none of his business. He wants to help, and says he didn’t know about Chet before; Dillon filled him in. She says her brother is a private guy, but Nathan says that’s not the whole story. He says she can talk to him, but she says Chet wouldn’t want her to.

Dante comes in with the kids, and Laura asks if something happened. Lulu asks what happened that Rocco is so dirty, and he says checking under rocks for worms. Laura asks Spencer what’s with the attitude, and he says he’s questioning the company they keep. Charlotte asks if he always talks like that. Spencer says that she and her father stole his life. Laura says that’s enough, and he says his father didn’t die that long ago. Has she forgotten?

Elizabeth gives Jake her phone to play a game, and asks Hayden if she’s okay. Hayden talks about how she’s been feeling sick, and Elizabeth tells her it must be the flu, jokingly adding, or she’s pregnant. Hayden says, surprise!

Sam feels like it’s something dire, which isn’t her M.O. Doc asks about the baby, and congratulates her. He asks if she thinks her anxiety has to do with Jake. She says it doesn’t help, but she’s thinking about that time in Jason’s life, two years unaccounted for.

Costa tells Jason that it was his job. Jason says he failed his job. He wants to know why Costa endangered his son. Costa grabs ahold of him, and holds him over the edge of the balcony.

Amy says that Chet is amazing, and was the envy of everyone in high school. She says he was nice, changing it to is nice, wondering why she keeps using past tense. She talks about how he championed losers. She was thrilled when he got a scholarship, but knew she’d miss him. Most big brothers would have teased or ignored her, but he gave her advice. He came up with the Man Landers name when he wrote to her from college; he always knew what to do. She says it’s different since he came home from Afghanistan. Nathan tells her that he read about Chet getting injured in combat. Amy says he’s in a group home, because their mother couldn’t take care of him anymore.

Laura sits Spencer down. She says his father was her son and she loved him. Charlotte isn’t to blame for what Valentin did, like he isn’t to blame for what Helena did. He tells her that’s a low blow. She says he’s upset and angry, but doesn’t have the right to take it out on Charlotte. She asks if they’re on the same page, and he says yes. She sends him to do a jigsaw puzzle with the other kids. When his piece doesn’t fit, he messes up the entire puzzle. I feel his pain. I often want to get a hammer and make the piece fit.

Hayden tells Elizabeth that she just found out. Elizabeth asks if it’s Finn’s, and Hayden says of course. Elizabeth asks how she’s feeling emotionally, and she says it’s been rocky, but she’s getting there. She asks why Elizabeth is hiding, and Elizabeth says Helena. Hayden tells her that answer is good enough. She asks how Elizabeth dealt with what happened to Jake. Elizabeth says you always want to protect your children. It’s not always possible, but if she didn’t keep going, she’d be missing out on the greatest experience of her life.

Sam tells Doc that in some ways Jason is the same, but in others, completely different. She wonders if he’s hiding from himself. Doc says he treated Jason way back when, after his accident, and he’s the single most resistant patient he ever had. Self-determination was the most important thing to him. Sam says Helena took that from him; he wasn’t in control. Doc says that went against everything he stands for. Needing to check his messages, Doc steps away from the table. There’s something from the hospital telling him that all non-emergency situations have been canceled for the rest of the afternoon. When he looks back at the table, Sam is gone.

Jason asks why Costa didn’t disappear. Costa says he had no choice, just like Jason didn’t when he was working for her. He and Jason struggle back and forth.

Nathan asks how Amy got material for the blog. She says she read an awful advice column, and looked at a comments section. She gave her own advice, or what she thought Chet’s two cents would be, and got a ton of responses. Nathan says she was channeling Chet, and she says she’s gotten good at giving advice too. It started off as fun, but then her mother died. There isn’t enough money for Chet to stay where he is. Nathan asks about her father, but Amy doesn’t quite reply to his question, saying that’s why she broke the sick-out; she needed to work to keep Chet afloat. She realized the blog could be her answer, but by then everyone wanted to know who Man Landers was and what he looked like. Nathan says, the rest is history.

Costa says it’s not over for him, like it’s not over for Jason. Cops storm through the doors, followed by Sam, and Jason releases Costa. One of the cops says they’re both going downtown. Sam tells them that the other guy threatened Jason, and asks if they don’t recognize Jason as the one who disarmed the bomb. Jason says Costa tried to kill his son and his baby mama. The cop tells him that he’ll have to make a statement, and Sam says she’ll make sure that happens. Jason tells her that Costa is still working for Helena. She says Helena is gone and still taking from people. She asks if he’s okay.

Hayden doesn’t know if she’ll be a good mother. Elizabeth says no one does, and nothing prepares you, but concerns are good sign. Hayden asks what about her day with the boys, and Elizabeth tells her that coffee and sugar are not a good idea. Hayden says she’s learned her lesson with that. Elizabeth asks if she wants the baby, and when Hayden says she does, Elizabeth says that’s all that matters. Jake comes back, and says he hopes Hayden is feeling better. There’s a knock at the door, and a cop tells then that the incident is over and it’s all clear. Jake asks what incident?

Dante tells Spencer that they have to treat each other with kindness and respect. If he can’t manage that, he needs to sit by himself until he can. Laura tells him don’t look at her; clean up the puzzle that he ruined. She apologizes to Lulu, but Lulu says they’ve all been there. Doc drops by, and asks Laura if she has the afternoon free. She says she does, and Spencer says he does too. Doc says it’s a plan. I like Doc and Laura together, and he’s probably one of the few who would have the patience for Spencer.

Jason sees Jake and Elizabeth, and asks if they’re okay. Elizabeth says what about him, and he says she can’t hurt them anymore. Oh yeah? How does he know? Costa just came out of nowhere. Maybe there are fifty other Costas. Not to mention that’s awfully optimistic for Jason.

Amy says with Nathan’s face on the blog, it exploded. She thought she could generate revenue, but he found out. She says it was wrong of her to steal his picture. She took it down, but that doesn’t help with the publishing deal. They wanted to meet him, but it’s her problem, not his. She asks him to keep everything in confidence. She drops her folders all over the place, and Nathan helps her pick them up. He sees the medical bills.

At the park, Spencer asks to get a hot pretzel. Laura says only if he promises to apologize to Charlotte. He does, and goes off, while Laura and Doc sit on a bench. Laura feels like she’s just run a marathon, and Doc says parenthood is a marathon that never ends. She tells him that Spencer was spoiled to begin with, then after the tragedy, he was indulged even more, but she has to reign him in. She says he’s angry about Valentin, and has the right to be, but it’s coming out now, and he’s focusing on Charlotte. Doc says he can see how that would be tense in tight quarters. Laura thinks she should leave now, so Lulu can settle in with her new family. Doc asks if Spencer isn’t going back to school, and she says that’s up for debate, but she should still find her own place. Doc tells her he knows just the place – his place.

Charlotte pouts, and Lulu suggests a snack break. Charlotte says she isn’t hungry. Lulu sends Rocco to the kitchen to find out what they have that might be tempting. She asks Charlotte if Spencer upset her. Lulu says he’s not really mad at her, and Charlotte says she knows that. She says she likes staying there, and she’s having fun, but she misses her papa and Nina. She asks if Lulu and Dante are mad.

Hayden takes Jake to the vending machine, and Elizabeth asks Jason how do they know Costa isn’t answering to someone else? Jason says he said he wasn’t. Well, I guess that settles it then. Sam moves away to sit on the steps, and Jason says he can’t be 100% certain, but he doesn’t think so. Costa was just carrying out orders. Jason thinks they can stop worrying. Sam starts getting buggy on the stairs.

Amy asks Nathan for her paperwork back. He says some of the bills are from years ago, and Amy says they keep piling up. He asks how she’s going to pay for all this, and she says she’ll figure it out. She begs him not to tell anyone, and he promises not to. She starts to jet, and he asks her to wait.

Laura tells Doc that he doesn’t have to, but he says he wants to. She doesn’t want him to feel like he needs to rescue her, and he tells her that he must be doing something wrong. He loves her. Waking up next to her and having her next to him at the end of the day, what could be better? She says it sounds wonderful, but she wants to be realistic. What if he hates something about her? He doesn’t think he’ll have any problems. She asks if he’s scared, and he says no. His feelings are real and aren’t going to change. And if that’s not enough, he can dig out the Santa suit. He says, let’s do this.

Dante tells Charlotte that they’re not mad. Lulu talks about all the people who love her, and says the more love you have to give, the more is given back. Charlotte says it’s like a star, even if you can’t see it in the daytime, it’s there. Dante says he knows that everything is strange, but they’re here for her. Lulu says they’re her family, and it’s forever. They hug, and Rocco comes back with snacks, joining in the hug.

At the vending machine, Hayden tells Jake to choose wisely, and explains buyer’s remorse. He picks something, and she says she likes a man who knows what he wants. The candy gets stuck, but Hayden bangs on the machine and it falls. Jake is impressed.

Sam worries on the stairwell. Elizabeth tells Jason that it will be new, not waiting for the other shoe to drop. She says that Jake is lucky to have so many people who love him, but Jason says they’re the lucky ones. When Sam looks at Jason, she sees blood running down his face.

Amy thanks Nathan for listening. He asks what Man Landers wears in public. He’ll need to know for meeting the publishers. Amy says she didn’t tells him for that reason, and he says that friends help each other. She hugs him.

The puzzle is done, and Rocco gives the last piece to Charlotte to put in. Lulu says their first family puzzle is complete. The kids go to pick out another one, and Dante and Lulu kiss.

Laura tells Doc that it won’t be just them; she has Spencer. She hopes that Doc knows she loves him. She says he’s been the most amazing gift, and she doesn’t want to mess it up. He says they’re a package deal, and he’s okay with that. As long as she’s with him, he’s happy. Laura agrees to move in, and they hug. Spencer comes back, and asks what about him?

Elizabeth decides to check on Jake. Jake tells Hayden that she’s pretty cool, and she says he is too. Elizabeth watches Jake hug Hayden.

Sam is crying, and staring at Jason, and he asks her what’s wrong? He asks if she’s okay, and still seeing bloody Jason, she says that she doesn’t think so. Thank goodness. I nearly went into diabetic shock with all the hugs and happiness today.

On Monday, Spencer asks what Doc’s intentions are, Nelle wonders who would be out to hurt her, and Griff asks Sonny if he’s planning on killing Ava.

🎭 I’m watching Bill Cosby: An American Scandal, and the whole thing is just depressing and sad. I grew up with Bill Cosby. He was extraordinarily funny. My sister taught me his stand-up routines when I was five or six years old, and I would repeat them to my fellow kindergartners. I guess you could say I was somewhat precocious. I also remember I Spy being a TV staple, although I was too young at the time to understand what a landmark show it was. Then there were his later TV efforts, and even though I’m not a sitcom person, I watched dutifully, and found it not painful, and often amusing. It’s almost like finding out an elderly family member committed heinous crimes. I realize he hasn’t technically been found guilty, but… Like I said, depressing and sad.

😱 I also took a look at 90 Day Fiancé – Danielle &Mohamad: Our Continuing Journey. The only thing I can say is, What. Is. This?!

😵 I had a zombie senior moment this evening, thinking I had missed Z-Nation. When is that coming back? Is it with Franco?

Father’s Day – Quotes of the Week

The heart of a father is the masterpiece of nature.Abbé Prévost

My father didn’t tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. – Clarence B. Kelland

She did not stand alone, but what stood behind her, the most potent moral force in her life, was the love of her father.Harper Lee

Never lose your sense of humor.My father. It was the only piece of advice he gave me when I left home.  I’m sure he knew how easy it would be to lose it in this world.

DadWasRight

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June 14, 2017 – Return of the Original Spinelli, Luann Gets Married, Gordon Kicks Butt & 2008

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

FYI, GH did not air anything new yesterday, so we didn’t miss anything. Areas where the Sessions testimony wasn’t on, got a rerun.

Jason looks at the shipping label from Jake’s package. Sam gets angry, and tells him this whole thing needs to be over.

Jake has a session with Andre. Elizabeth asks to talk to him for a second. She’s worried about Jake’s recovery. She says he’s been acting like nothing ever happened. She wonders if it’s part of Helena’s plan, and there’s something else to be triggered.

In Kelly’s with Nathan, Nina wonders if she should personally drop off a dress she has for Charlotte. She misses her, but Charlotte is getting used to living with Lulu now.

Anna visits Lulu. She hopes that Valentin hasn’t escaped custody, but Anna says he’s in custody in the Netherlands. She explains about the video that Valentin recorded; she promised she would show it to Charlotte.

The old Spinelli is back! He tells Sonny he’s sorry for his loss. Sonny says Ava is paying for what she did. Carly comes in, but Spinelli says unfortunately duty calls, and he can’t stay. Carly tells Sonny that Brick is cool, but she misses Spinelli, and Sonny should be grateful he has two geniuses to count on. Sonny is glad to see her, but she says they need to talk about what happened yesterday.

Nina says she did what Nathan wanted. She’s gotten the divorce papers back, and Valentin is in the Netherlands. Nathan says regardless of how he feels, Valentin loved her and it can’t be easy. Nina says they were a family, and it was the happiest time in her life, but it’s over. She says she also knows there was a part of Valentin that he couldn’t outrun, and that’s why he’s in prison. She’s moving on without bitterness or regrets. Well, maybe one regret.

Lulu tells Anna that they talked about Valentin visiting and reassuring Charlotte, but the WSB moved too fast. As usual, thinking only of herself, Lulu says Charlotte is doing great and doesn’t want to upset her by showing it to her. Anna says she gave her word. Lulu asks if there’s honor among spies, and Anna says they call it being human. He was a good father and wanted to say good-by. What is Lulu going to do when Charlotte asks later why her father never said good-by? I vote for lie and make a mess of things.

Andre sees no signs of a hidden agenda. His best advice to Elizabeth is to treat Jake like the others, and not like he’s under a microscope. She should trust how he’s doing. Everyone carries traces of trauma, but the important thing is to face it and not fear it; life continues.

Jason tells Sam that they can’t assume the threat is over. Helena is dead, but someone was working for her. Sam asks why it has to be him that finds them. Jason says a weapon was put in his son’s hands and he’s not letting it go. He asks her what’s going on. She says nothing; she’s just tired, and maybe coming down with something. Jason suggests someone else watch Scout, and she go back to the spa. She says she’s not a spa kind of girl, and he tells her to take a nap. If she feels up to it, maybe they can have lunch at the MetroCourt. She tells him be careful, and he says he always is.

Carly tells Sonny that things got emotional, and Sonny says no surprise. It was like the clouds parted when Ava confessed. It won’t bring Morgan back, but they have answers, and don’t have to believe they failed. It wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world if she died. Carly says she got an update from Bobbie, and Ava’s condition has been upgraded to stable, and she’s even improving. Carly asks what if she never pays, but Sonny says she will in one way or another. He tells her to forget about Ava; he wants to feel what he did yesterday, and won’t let Ava change that. Carly brushes him off, saying she can’t do this.

Amy 2.0 asks Nathan for a favor. He says no, without even knowing what it is. He tells her that he’s not being the face of her advice column. She says he’s the only one who can save the book deal.

Lulu tells Anna that the last thing Charlotte needs is a reminder of a father who put her life at risk. Anna thinks that’s funny coming from someone with Luke as a father. You tell her, Anna. Lulu says that she’s not traumatizing Charlotte. Anna says it’s nothing cryptic; it’s sweet, and he tells her that wherever he is, he’ll be thinking about her. She adds that he’s promised to come back. Nina is at the door, and asks if that’s true, and if there’s a chance he could be released.

Jason meets with Spinelli. He explains about the package sent to Jake, and how it was really from Helena. Spinelli looks at the shipping label and says, The Jackal takes over.

Elizabeth drops by Jason’s place, wearing a beautiful lace top over a tank. She asks Sam if she can leave Jason a message. She tells Sam what Andre said, and wishes she felt they were past the danger. She mentions the shipping receipt, and Sam says that Jason is out looking for the mystery delivery man, and who knows what trouble that will start. Elizabeth says she just wants Jake safe, but Sam hears different voices in her head talking about being safe, like what happened to her at the spa. Elizabeth asks her about being an emergency contact while Jake is at camp, and is about to give her some information, but Sam sees her taking a gun out of her purse. Elizabeth hands her the forms, saying that she hopes it’s not an imposition. She asks if Sam is okay.

Spinelli tells Jason that he’s found security cameras in the area where the package came from.

Andre tells Jake that they’re just going to talk, and if he feels uncomfortable, just let him know. They do word association. He asks what he thinks of when he hears mom and dad – motorcycle riding and pizza – and has him elaborate. Then Andre says, Cassadine Island, and Jake is silent. He tells Jake what he thinks about – a little boy a lot like him, only younger, alone except for someone whispering in his ear. Jake says maybe, and Andre continues. He thinks the little boy had no one to talk to except an old woman telling him he was meant to do bad things. He says it’s a lot, but if Jake trusts him, he needs him to look at him. He tells Jake that he’s not that little boy anymore; he’s home and safe. He has his mom and dad and his brothers; he has Andre. He’s back where he belongs. He’s not a bad guy; he’s a good guy. I don’t think this is how word association works, but Andre is the psychiatrist. At a hospital I will never go to.

Carly tells Sonny that Josslyn knows. She says one minute they’re at each other’s throats, and the next they’re kissing. Sonny says he doesn’t blame Josslyn for being confused, but after what they’ve been though, it feels right. Carly says they keep going through the same cycle, and asks if he wants to go through it again. He says they made bad choices out of grief, but they can do better. Carly doesn’t want to risk doing it again, and risk hurting the ones they love. He asks if that’s really it, or is she still pissed about Jax?

Anna tells Nina that the WSB is confident they can secure a conviction. Nina talks about Valentin saying he’d be back last time, and he was. Anna can’t speculate. Nina says she knows Charlotte will miss him. Lulu has to pick her up, and asks Nina to wait to give her the dress personally. Anna says what about the message, but Lulu doesn’t know. She leaves, and Nina apologizes for putting Anna on the spot. Anna says it’s no secret how Lulu feels and why. Nina says it’s just them, and she wants to know what’s going to happen to Valentin.

Amy tells Nathan that there’s no book deal unless they can meet the man behind the column. Nathan says there is no man, and she should take credit for her own work. Clearly, he doesn’t have the answers to anyone’s problems, and the answer to this is no. He suggests she find someone else, and she tells him thanks for nothing. Geez, they’re basically acquaintances – Amy II expects a lot.

Anna doesn’t know what’s going to happen, but Valentin is living proof of what happens when the WSB wants to tie something off. She says the Chimera shouldn’t have existed in the first place, and they have to blame someone. She thinks they’re going to make Valentin the scapegoat. She doesn’t support it, but his hands aren’t clean. Nina says neither are her sister’s. Anna says they had her in custody, but she got away. She hates what Alex did, and thinks she should stand trial. Nina says it doesn’t matter; they’re getting divorced. Nina asks if Anna thinks she’s a coward. Anna says she can’t tell Nina how to think or feel, but the story isn’t black and white. The man she knew and married, Charlotte’s father, is a good man. She thinks he’s the man he wanted to be before it went so horribly wrong.

Carly says what Sonny did to Jax was wrong, but if the positions were reversed, she’d do the same. Sonny says thanks for admitting that they’re alike, which is why they belong together. She tells him that when things go wrong, they don’t balance each other out; they implode. He asks if she still wants a divorce.

Sam tells Elizabeth she’s sleep deprived and thinks she might be getting a cold. Elizabeth ask if she wants a doctor appointment, but Sam says no, and of course she can use her as a contact for Jake; she’s actually honored. Elizabeth asks her to have Jason call if he finds out anything. Sam says the guy is probably long gone, and Elizabeth says she hopes Sam is right. When Elizabeth is gone, Sam tells herself to get a grip. It’s nothing sleep won’t cure.

Spinelli tells Jason that maybe there was no delivery truck, and the guy came in a car. He notices one that was in the vicinity a couple of times. He can’t get clear image of a face, but gets the license plate. Jason says good thing Spinelli isn’t in the business anymore, or he might have to hack into government records and find out who owns the car. They smile at each other.

Lulu comes back with Charlotte. Nina tells Charlotte she missed her, and asks about camp. Charlotte asks if papa is back, but Nina says that she brought her something. Charlotte opens the box and says the dress is prettier than she’d imagined. Nina says she told them how to make it, so she’s the designer. Charlotte thanks her. Nina tells Charlotte that there have been a lot of changes, and she’s here living with her mom and new family. Nina thinks it’s cool, and wants her to know they won’t see each other that much anymore. Charlotte asks if she’s going away, but Nina says no. Charlotte is with her mom and family now, and she’s happy for her, but no matter what, she loves her. Charlotte says she knows, and loves her too. They sing a song together. Anna tells Lulu it’s not about them; it’s about Charlotte.

Sam wakes up startled, and thinking someone is there. She calls out, who are you, and what do you want? I’m not sure why people do that. If someone is sneaking around your house, they’re probably not going to answer those questions. Sam hears Scout crying, and goes upstairs.

Spinelli tells Jason that it’s a rental car, and he has to look up the license of the renter. After a moment, Spinelli says, got him.

Andre tells Elizabeth that he and Jake had a good talk. He’s a sensitive, bright boy, and they’re on the right track. Jake tells Andre he doesn’t want to be a magician anymore. Maybe he wants to play baseball. An orderly watches them from the hallway.

Lulu tells Charlotte that Anna has something for her too, from her papa. Anna tells her that Valentin was sad that he didn’t get to see her before he went away, but he made a video for her. She says she can set it up for privacy, but Charlotte wonders if Nina should hear it too, since she didn’t get to say good-by either.

Carly says she’ll sign everything back over to Sonny, and they can each keep what they brought to the marriage. He says rationally, it makes sense, and she asks if he agrees. He says they’ve been divorced before, and it didn’t change anything; they’re a part of each other. She says maybe they need to let go, and hugs him. That’s not letting go. She leaves, and Sonny ponders.

Charlotte gives Nina an earbud. She says she knows that Nina misses papa too. They listen together.

Amy is on the phone, saying she’ll find another way, and she’s sorry it’s going to take longer to find the money, but don’t give up, adding, I love you. Nathan overhears.

Sam says mommy needs her nap too, and gets back on the couch.

Spinelli asks Jason if he recognizes the guy, and he says yes. His name is Costa Phillipos, and he’s the orderly who was watching Jake.

Elizabeth thanks Andre. Jake says, happy mom, happy life. Andre thinks he might have a future as a baseball playing, motorcycle riding psychiatrist. Jake says he’ll think it over. The orderly follows them as they leave.

Tomorrow, Griff might know what’s wrong with Sam, Jake and Costa meet, and Olivia-F tells Julian to stay out of Leo’s life.

The Real Housewives of New York City

It’s morning at Sonja’s place, and her lover, Frenchie, is there. He’s already been up and out, and brought her a poinsettia, and is making eggs. In her interview, she says he’s taking it seriously, and it looks like they’re dating, and she’s dating Rocco. Tinsley comes down. She likes when Frenchie spends the night because she gets breakfast. In her interview, Tinsley tells us that originally Sonja had picked him out for her, and then scooped him up. They discuss relationships and labels. Zzzz… IMO nobody likes labels because they’re afraid to commit. To anything. In her interview, Sonja says it’s scary, and not what she was looking for, but expects things to fall into place. Frenchie mentions Rocco, so he’s not as ignorant as Sonja thinks. He makes more eggs, and I think I’m in love.

Bethenny is decorating for her holiday party. She wants it to be a glam NYC party. A super gigantic bottle of SkinnyGirl is brought in. There’s a luge made of ice on it, and some kind of contraption that you can drink out of. Someone gave me a bottle of her Cosmopolitan once, and it was good, but I was like, where’s the liquor? Dorinda throws a gift together in the car. Ramona wasn’t invited. She’s going out with Avery and her girlfriends instead. Do they know? Sonja is off to some faraway place after dropping in. Tinsley jokes that she and Connor are getting together while she’s away, but Sonja isn’t amused.

Bethenny has personalized ornaments for everyone. Dorinda arrives first, and marvels at the caviar. She asks the chef to teach her how to open an oyster. He says eating oysters is like eating the sea. Very poetic. Oyster success! Dorinda says the ornaments are perfect, and Bethenny says she has one for Luann, but she’s away. And Ramona isn’t allowed in her building. Coal for you!

Ramona and the girls go to a restaurant, and she suggests starting with a cocktail. In her interview, she says it’s like Avery’s Sweet Sixteen was yesterday, and now all the girls are in their twenties. Ramona tells the girls about how she blacked out and attacked Bethenny in a rage. She claims that she and Bethenny are a lot alike. One of the girls says she shouldn’t have to walk on eggshells with a friend, and Ramona acts like she’s Yoda. In her interview, Ramona says they have a bond and synergy. Oh… I’m not even sure what to say. We flash back to Dorinda squawking at her about the guest room being trashed.

Tinsley arrives at Bethenny’s party, laden with gifts. Everything is white and feathery, with red, and silver accents. Carole says she’d be a bigger drinker if they all came in an ice sculpture luge. Tinsley talks about Ramona not apologizing for trashing Dorinda’s room, but saying that she shouldn’t have come at Bethenny. Dorinda tells them that she suggested leaving Ramona a can of gasoline next time. Sonja joins the group, and Dorinda says she was recapping. She says that Ramona is all, ignore it and it will go away, and Carole is surprised at Ramona’s aggression. She thinks that divorced life isn’t as fun as Ramona thought it would be. Sonja says Ramona has always trashes hotel rooms. What?

At the restaurant, Ramona tells the story in a whole different way, making up some cock-and-bull story, and pretending it was nothing. <sigh> We saw the pictures. Ramona says how special the girls are to her, and everyone toasts.

Luann gets ready for her big day. Dorinda arrives. Luann thinks she forgot she had to be there early for hair and makeup, and went to the beach. In her interview, Luann says she’s a hopeless romantic (or maybe she’s just hopeless – BA-DUM-CHH!), and Tom is like “home” for her. She feels loved, wanted, and whole as a couple. The attendants come down the aisle, with Luann following with her brother. She says it’s everything she imagined, and of course, she looks breathtaking. The altar is adorned with a simple arch of flowers. In her interview, Luann says a lot of people weren’t supportive, so this is what she has to say to them, and holds up her ring fingers. The bride and groom are announced, and Marilyn Monroe pops out of a cake. The first dance and cake happen while Luann voiceovers about love.

Carole and Bethenny go to Chinatown. They have lunch at a dumpling house where you pick your own dumplings and other dishes out from a cart. Carole wants Bethenny to choose her food. Bethenny says Carole is literally lost in America. They talk about not being invited to Luann’s wedding. In her interview, Carole alludes to something about Tom, but I’m not sure what. That he’s gay? A playboy? I don’t know. Adam has finally moved out. Carole tells Bethenny it’s time, and six months of living together was a lot. She feels like there’s balance again.

Ramona visits Dorinda. Fast wedding. Do we get a special? Dorinda tells Ramona that she forgot to book some of the flights. In her interview, she hopes it wasn’t anything psychological. She says Luann looked like a princess, and shows Ramona some video clips. In her interview, Dorinda tells us that she also forgot her dress. She doesn’t want to go to any more parties right now. Apparently, Luann is having a party for the people who weren’t invited, or as Ramona says, the discards.

Bethenny and Ramona go to an ice cream place, where Bethenny orders green tea Oreo. Carole tries blueberry lavender, and makes a face like you would think. She ends up getting chocolate, and Bethenny tells her that she’s boring.

Sonja says she has to make space for Frenchie’s things. She explains to Tinsley that she told him that he’s more on Tinsley’s list than hers, because he’ll want kids, and he said what about adoption? Sonja pretends to faint. She gives Tinsley instructions on the changes he wants, and says it’s a conundrum. Tinsley wonders if she can make changes too.

NYC at Christmastime is a wonderland. Bethenny hopes this is the last celebration she attends for a wedding she wasn’t invited to. She says she did call Luann a whore though, and deserves her station in life, the aftermath party. Ha-ha! She hits the bar before anyone else gets there. Dorinda is next, and Bethenny says it’s weird that she’s been there by by herself for fifteen minutes. Ever the hostess, even though it’s not her party, Dorinda apologizes. Dorinda tells her about the wedding, and how they have to stop celebrating now. Bethenny says it’s like Ramadan.

Luann arrives – she’s married – time to celebrate! She says she didn’t cut the line, she just got in it, and got a great guy. Ramona thinks the venue is drab, and maybe they ran out of money. She’s the worst. She asks Luann about the wedding, explaining to Avery that it was Luann’s first wedding, since she eloped the first time. Luann tells them how wonderful it was. Ramona thinks Tinsley’s date – Troy, the guy she met at the bar – is more appropriate for Avery. Tinsley happens to look quite young, you jealous thing. I never liked them younger even when I was, but I think you should date/marry whoever you bloody well want to.

Tom talks about Luann putting her heart and soul into the wedding. Sonja makes a grand entrance with Frenchie. She’d been keeping him on the DL, but now her worlds are mixed. Tinsley tells Bethenny about Frenchie moving in, and Bethenny compares it to Three’s Company. I hear Ramona’s annoying laugh. In her interview, Dorinda wonders how that works with Sonja still dating Rocco.

Tinsley’s date is twenty-three. Carole thinks that’s fine, but he’s not husband material for her. Sonja says Ramona generally doesn’t bring one of her victims out in public. In other words, she’s brought a date. Tinsley spills her wine. Troy swills his wine. Frenchie talks about bicycling through a vineyard. Sonja says Tinsley’s date is like, twelve, and Ramona tells her to shush. Tom says Luann is a great cook, and Carole asks if he actually saw her make the food. Sonja introduces them to Frenchie.

Tom says Luann is the best present he ever got. Dorinda bangs on a glass for attention. She says since she made a speech that was barely understandable at the engagement party, she’s making a toast now. She thanks Luann for having them, and asks if they’re done celebrating. Everyone laughs. Encouraged, She gets off on a small tangent about how great the wedding was, even though some of them weren’t invited, and how good it made her feel. Tom says she always makes it nice. Kudos to him for paying attention. He talks about never being happier, and everyone drinks. Bethenny and company drink to the friends that weren’t invited.

Next time, Sonja tells Frenchie that everyone is joking about them, Sonja talks to Rocco, Frederik is back, and Dorinda tries to play peacemaker. Good luck with that.

🍳 Aarón Sánchez has joined Gordon and Christina Tosi as a judge on MasterChef. Gordon told contestant Mark that his American breakfast dish was “hard to look at,” and asked if he was just going through the motions. In all honesty, looking at his plate, I thought I could go through the motions better than that and wondered how he got here. That’s the first time I’ve said that in the history of MasterChef. Not surprisingly, Mark went home. He was a good loser sport, but then negated it by saying if he had two arms, he’d be patting himself on the back. Humility, dude.

🍜 On The f Word, Kal Pen, Max Greenfield, and Katy Perry were guests. The challenge dish was chicken parmigiana, with  spaghetti and broccoli rabe. The challengers were The Meatheads – a group of friends and retired football players – vs Win & Stein – siblings from Boca Raton who dress in costume on Thanksgiving, when they play a game of kickball, a bottle of champagne going to the winners. The Meatheads had the highest percentage of diners saying they’d pay for the meal, therefore moving to the finals. This surprised me, since several of the diners had complained of the chicken being undercooked.

It was National Bourbon Day, so Gordon played a game of truth or fiction with Kal, the loser drinking a shot. Gordon lost miserably, and after a few shots, started tossing them on the floor. After Kal answered wrong, and took an extra shot to make it more even, he found out Gordon’s glasses contained green tea instead. The Guinness world record holder was challenged by Gordon to a match of halibut fileting. (It has to be cut into portions of a certain size as well.) Nineteen-year-old Jenna Fabich lost by 9 seconds, and Gordon now holds the title. Katy and Gordon made meatballs over spiralized vegetables, with Katy being given only vocal instructions, as Gordon set up a partition between them. I find her alternately fun and irritating. I was good with her until she ran away from a smoking pan. If there had been a couch in the vicinity, I’m sure she would have jumped on it. I have to mention too, that this show is filmed live, which adds a certain flavor to the atmosphere. No pun intended, but it is an f-word. Next time, it’s Andy Cohen in a cook-off with Gordon, there’s a fishing excursion, and Gordon’s daughter, Tilly, joins him.

🎪 This week, Andy Cohen’s Then & Now covered 2008 – oh, the year my life started going downhill. Britney Spear’s breakdown, and the YouTube guy who yelled “leave her alone!” Octomom, and Bernie Madoff (even Elie Wiesel got taken). Obama (thanks for ruining my life during your administration) and how that ties into Trump (thanks for ruining my life right now, because I can’t win no matter what party is in office). Ironman, Dark Knight, and the more human superheroes. Heath Ledger’s death, the beginnings of The Real Housewives of the OC, and the housing market crash. Kevin Smith commenting on the comics come to life, and the guys from Million Dollar Listing giving insight into the real estate drop. In an amusing moment, while Sarah Palin was being discussed, Andy accidentally called Tina Fey “Tina Palin.” When cultures collide. An interesting bit of Trivia was also handed to Meghan McCain when Andy told her about a cereal named after her father (and a few other political figures), the profits going to kickstart Airbnb. She was like, my father didn’t see a dime, but more power to them. Next time is the season finale. They didn’t give a year, but it looks like the theme is the rich and famous. I’ll be sad when this is over – it’s been a fun look back!

June 13, 2017 – Sessions Replaces Soaps, Kenny WILL Eat Onions & a Wild Quote

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Funny. That doesn’t look like GH. It looks like the Sessions testimony. Wake me when it’s over.

3:22 (the time, not a Bible verse) and it looks like it’s not going to be over.

Thank you, FOX, for not bothering with this drivel. At least I got to see my favorite judge, Marilyn Milian, on People’s Court. I suppose this screws up the entire GH rhythm for the week though.

Below Deck Mediterranean

When last we left, Chef Adam was doing his best to make sure the tip is as low as possible. Primary guest Kenny is going to eat onions whether he wants to or not, and no matter how much money he’s spent not to eat them.

The ferry has been delayed, and Adam gripes that the food is going to spoil. Hannah says she can’t look after both the inside and his food, so he should take the initiative. He suggests maybe Bugs should be chief stew, and Hannah suggests they get a chef that can read preference sheets. Bugs is annoyed at being put in the middle, but I’m not sure why she didn’t speak up for Hannah here. The ferry arrives, and champagne corks are popped.

Hannah says she doesn’t need Adam diminishing her rank in front of her first stew. Adam is thrilled to be on the ferry with Malia. He has a burning feeling inside that he wants to pursue. I think that’s called something else, but we’ll leave it there. Hannah tells us that the waterfalls there are the most beautiful in Europe. Seeing them, I’m sure she’s right, although the picnic spot is crowded, and reminiscent of an NYC park in summertime.

Adam says he’s met Kennys before on charters, and they’re his rivals. He thinks Kenny should be appreciative and like onions. Hannah tells Wes about Adam’s attitude. In his interview, Wes says people come out of their shells on charters. You see who they really are, and Adam is an ogre on the inside. Man, is he being polite.

Adam and Malia sneak off to the waterfall. Although it’s not that sneaky, since the rest of the crew notices. Bobby is miffed that he’ll never get his chance. The guests have more shots than I would before going into the water. Adam talks to Malia, who says she likes being on the outside, like the yacht is a prison. He answers that he likes being on the outside with her. Bleh. They talk about what they’re doing after charter season. In her interview, Malia says part of her is thinking that Wes didn’t get the opportunity to come, and yaps about how she’s getting to know two very different guys. Zzzzz…

The guests come back to the boat, more liquor, and the Jacuzzi. Bugs alerts Adam that they’re asking about dinner already. In his interview, Adam says Kenny rubbed him the wrong way, saying that people hire him because they like his food, and “this redneck isn’t going to pull him through the mud.” Honestly, what is wrong with him? Because the guest was given a preference sheet and filled it out with his preferences, this makes him an awful human? Adam is dragging himself through the mud. He puts onions in the soup. A guy, who has paid tens of thousands for his yacht vacation, has one freaking request, and not only can Adam not comply with it, he has to call him nasty names. I swear, if I ever see Adam on the street, we’re having it out. He annoys me more than Puck from The Real World. And that is saying a lot.

The dinner table is decorated in gold, silver and pearls. Love the pearls! Hannah tells the guests they’re doing an obstacle course in the morning, with the crew competing against the guests. Hannah and Lauren serve the soup, and I hold my breath. Kenny asks if it’s onion soup, even though it was presented as lentil. The worst part of the whole thing is how Adam watches them again on the monitor like some creepy voyeur.

Out on deck, Max asks Malia if Adam is her cup of tea, and what about Wes. In his interview, he says he’s glad he’s taken, so he’s out of this. The entrée is lamb and some kind of local vegetables. I’m not a fan of lamb, but it looks fabulous, and I’m intrigued by the vegetable plate. Hopefully, it’s not laden with onions. Wes and Malia go for a walk. Hannah serves the lamb, and the guests joke that they’re vegetarian. Kenny is sure there were onions in the soup. What if he was allergic or it caused some other health problem? He seems like a nice guy too. If I’d paid that much not to eat onions, Adam would be wearing them.

Max tells Bobby that Malia was put off by the Lauren thing, but Bobby thinks he could win her over and is still going to try.  Wes says he and Adam used to be buddy-buddy, but it’s not happening now because of Malia. One of the guests falls asleep on the toilet. Apparently, it’s not the first time, and he has a reputation for it.

Bobby asks Malia if she’s up for a chat. He asks her if she’d be interested if it was a different situation. I guess they must all be after her because pickin’s are slim on charter. She’s cute, but it’s not like she belongs on a runway. Malia doesn’t think that Bobby is a bad guy, and he’s her type of guy, but the baggage with Lauren is a blockade. She’s willing to hang out and see if a friendship develops, and he thinks he still has a chance. Actually, he looks pretty good next to Adam.

Breakfast is followed by cocktails. Kenny thinks maybe they’ve set the bar too high for Adam. Hannah doesn’t feel anything is resolved, and becomes all business with Adam. The obstacle course is set up. One of the challenges is carrying an egg on a spoon while wearing a diving suit, which is pretty amusing. Bobby says he feels like Gumby (dammit!). By the time they get to the hotdog eating challenge, it’s more goofing around than anything else. Lauren says the crew really won, but they’re calling it a tie. Captain Sandy arrives with shots. Kenny says it’s been great except for the onions in his food. In her interview, the captain is like, what?

Bugs says everything was perfect between her and Hannah, until Adam said something. My advice is that Bugs should have countered what he said, instead of acquiescing. Kenny talks to Bugs about the onion issue. He thinks they were clear after the first time, and he’s sure there were onions in the soup. Hannah asks if Adam can make chips instead of French fries, but that’s also too hard for him. I’m starting to wonder about his credentials. Maybe he really handed out samples at Costco. The captain asks Adam if he’s putting onions in the food. On deck, Bobby says when he gets his own boat, he’s naming it “See You Next Tuesday,” because he’s really a fourteen-year-old boy, and negates all the good feelings I had for him a few paragraphs ago.

Adam admits to cooking with onions, but claims he didn’t do it after the first time. Captain Sandy asks if he can cook without them. In her interview, she says guests pay top dollar and make out preference sheets for a reason. Thank you. Kenny talks to Hannah about the soup. She asks Bugs about it, but Bugs isn’t sure. Max is concerned that Adam is going to cost them. Hannah approaches Adam about the soup, and he admits to putting onions in it. She asks why he would do that, and he claims you can’t make a good soup without them, and he thought it was funny. Hannah thinks he’s psychotic. She wonders if she should tell Kenny he’s right, and Adam says if she wants to ruin the tip. She calls him a wanker. Ha-ha! He claims he can’t make these people happy, and he didn’t like the way Kenny was talking. Huh? Hannah says she just does her job, and gives the guests what’s on their preference sheets. He asks if that’s a resting bitch face, and the captain overhears. She tells him not to put onions in the food.

Bobby complains that he’s being strategically placed where Malia isn’t. Hannah tells Captain Sandy that her issue isn’t with the onions on the first night, but Adam went out of his way to put them in the food on the second night because he thought it was funny. In her interview, the captain also uses the word “psychotic.” Hannah tells her about how Adam said that Bugs should be chief stew, and thinks he’s directly affecting the guests. Lauren asks Hannah how it’s going, and Hannah tells her about Adam. She wants the rest of the crew to know how he sabotaged them. Bugs and Malia talk. Malia thinks this side of Adam isn’t a good one, and didn’t know it existed.

Time for the guests to depart. It should be interesting. I’d give the rest of them Adam’s part of the tip, purposely cutting him out, like it was a will and I was Joan Crawford. Kenny says the interior and the crew nailed it. He tells Adam that he doesn’t like onions, and Adam breached that. His only suggestion is in the chef area, explaining that they had the same breakfast every day, and feels that if they hadn’t specifically asked for eggs, they wouldn’t have gotten them. Of course not, he would have given them onions. Kenny gives special kudos to Hannah, who he says has extraordinary patience. I don’t think these people were bad at all, and there were plenty of guests who would have totally flipped out over the onion thing.

The crew meets in the main salon. Captain Sandy says that no one was carried off on a stretcher and there were no breakdowns (not sure if she’s referring to the boat, the people, or both), but it wasn’t necessarily a success. She addresses Adam specifically, saying the guests obviously weren’t happy. In her interview, she says she’s pissed off, and if he did it out of spite, she’ll want to meet with him. Shockingly, the tip is the best they’ve had. $20K, or $1,818 each. In his interview, Adam says reality is starting to kick in. Idiot.

Bobby says if he was the captain, Adam would be gone. Wes is getting mixed signals from Malia. The captain asks Adam why. He claims that it was the only way the soup could have any flavor, since he’s never heard of celery, bay leaf, or beef stock. Captain Sandy says next charter, she’s watching him. In her interview, she says that she wants to fire him, but can’t find chef mid-season in Croatia. Where. Is. Ben?

Drama, onions, ego. Hannah is ready to let loose. Lauren pours vodka into her Coke bottle. Adam doesn’t want to go out, but feels like he should show he’s part of the team. Hannah says it’s been awkward with Bugs, but Adam is the only one who should feel awkward. Agreed. At dinner, everyone talks about the guests and how cool they were. Adam says if they hadn’t gotten a tip, he’d be feeling horrible, and offers them his share. Malia respects him for that, but they say no, which he probably figured would happen, so I call bullsh*t. I’d take it. In his interview, Wes alludes that Adam made the gesture for Malia, but money can’t solve being a d*ck. Never a truer word has been spoken.

The crew moves on to a club. Hannah talks to Lauren about what Adam said. She thinks it made Bugs’s head get big. In her interview, Bugs thinks Hannah has something against her. Adam feels emotionally attached, and isn’t sure what’s happening with Wes and Malia, so he runs back to the boat like a middle schooler to the bathroom at a dance. Bugs says he wasn’t feeling the vibe, and Malia says she’ll be right back, because she’s an idiot too. Bobby says that just killed the vibe, and Wes is no longer interested. He says one day she’ll wish she chose the good guy.

Next charter, sparks fly between Hannah and a guest, a guest makes a pass at Bobby, Bugs confronts Hannah, and Captain Sandy says one more screw up and Adam is gone.

A Quote & Meme to Make Up for GH

I don’t give two hoots about civilization. I want to wander in the wild.Jane Goodall 

TheOffice