What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
Lulu asks Maxie why Dante shot Peter. Maxie thinks it could have been anyone; he just fired. She tells Lulu, Dante is in trouble. It’s really bad.
Finn asks Peter how he’s feeling. Peter says, about the same. The pain is manageable, and he’s just glad he doesn’t need surgery. Finn says he should be glad he’s alive. He can’t be reckless like that. Peter says, it was an accident, and Finn tells him, try to avoid future accidents, especially ones involving bullets. He’ll tell Anna that Peter will make a full recovery. Peter says he’s not telling Anna anything.
On the phone, Robert says he got a call from the Bureau; something is going on with Peter. He asks if they can meet him at Charlie’s. Julian asks to what does he owe this headache? It’s been a minute. Robert says, not long enough. Kim watches through the window from outside. She takes Oscar’s teddy bear out of her bag, and flashes back to drugging Drew. She walks away.
Curtis asks if Drew has a minute. He has a couple of delicate issues to discuss. He knows the will reading was today, and says he’s sure that was tough. Drew says, it wasn’t fun, but he’d rather not get into it now. Curtis says, no problem, and Drew asks, what else? Curtis wonders who drugged him, and asks if he knew Hayden was on The Haunted Star?
Nina tells Jax that she has good news; excellent news. Ad sales are up in anticipation of their Ava issue. He says with luck readership will increase, and she says, luck has nothing to do with it. She gives the readers what they want. She tells him she’s wrapping it up for the day, and he asks if she’s got a hot date with Valentin. She wonders why he wants her to share information about Valentin, and he says he thought he knew the family. Then Valentin falls out of sky, and inherits everything. He’s curious how Valentin managed it. She says he already knows everything there is to know about her fiancé, doesn’t he?
Ava goes out on the hospital rooftop, and sees tables with candles set up. She calls out for Sibley, who comes up behind Ava, startling her. Sibley asks if she’s ready to contact her daughter. Ava asks why Sibley snuck up on her. Does she want to give Ava a heart attack? Sibley says she got distracted by the view. It’s beautiful, clear, and perfect for channeling. Ava asks if the candles are meant to draw Kiki, but Sibley says the candles will keep them from bumping into each other. She knows Ava paid the guard to let them up there, but if the lights went on, it might draw unwanted attention. Ava asks, what now? Do they just start? Sibley says, after she receives payment. Ava hands over the money, and Sibley says, so let’s contact Kiki.
Lulu tells Maxie that she knew Dante was in trouble, but she had no idea it was this bad. Maxie says she’s sorry, and Lulu asks what she was doing there. Maxie says she called in a favor from her dad, and Lulu asks, why? Maxie says she wanted to tell Dante how much his family needed him. Lulu says Dante is in there for treatment. What the hell was she thinking?
Finn tells Peter that he has to let Anna know. Peter says they both know she’ll drop whatever she’s doing, and race back. Finn says, probably, and Peter says they’re still trying to figure out who they are to each other. They don’t need a mother and son reunion based on a crisis that didn’t happen. Finn doubts Anna would see it that way, and Peter tells Finn, call it what he wants, but he’s not telling her, and as his physician, Finn isn’t either.
Robert asks if Julian is tending bar, but Julian says he owns the joint. Robert says he heard a rumor that Julian was going legit, and Julian says, it’s not a rumor; it’s the truth. Robert remembers putting Julian in the Witness Protection Program, and it wasn’t long before he went back to organized crime. Julian asks if there’s a point to this, and Robert says he knows what Julian is; a killer who could revert to form. Julian says he doesn’t think so. Now he has somebody to be on the straight and narrow for. He tells Robert the first round is on him. He steps away, and Robert orders a bottle of their most expensive scotch.
Kim comes in, and Julian asks how the reading was. She says, hard, and he asks if she wants to talk. She says, maybe later, but first, she needs to tell him that she’s so sorry.
Drew tells Curtis that he doesn’t want talk about it. Curtis says Drew was drugged. Why is he more pissed about it than Drew. Drew says nothing happened. The person responsible realized they were wrong. Let it go. Curtis tells him if he says so. Drew says as head of Aurora security, does Curtis have anything business related to tell him about? Curtis says he wants to warn him. Jax… Hayden walks in, saying they need to talk about firewall protection. Drew is like, what?! When did she get back? More important, why is she in his office? She says she was looking for Curtis. Drew says he runs security there, and asks what her concern is. She says she’s the new CFO of the Aurora print division. Jax hired her. He asks Curtis to give him a minute, and Curtis says he’ll be outside. Hayden tells Drew, let’s get it over with. She works for Jax, and has nothing to do with him. He says ulterior motives are her forte, and asks what she wants now.
Curtis finds Jax, and tells him that his new CFO announced herself to Drew. He might want to do damage control. Jax tells Nina that they’ll talk later.
Finn says Peter was wounded in a WSB facility. Anna is going to find out. Peter says he’ll be recovered by that time. Finn says, that’s not the point. Keeping secrets is a mistake. Peter says, it’s his to make, and Finn is ethically bound to honor it. He can’t disclose any information, even to his fiancé. Finn starts to leave, and says, as fast as Peter and Anna knock down the wall between them, he keeps building it back up. He’s his own worst enemy.
Maxie tells Lulu that she should have thought the plan through, but Lulu says, there never should have been a plan. She shouldn’t have interfered in Dante’s progress. Now it’s obliterated, and he’s back to where he started. Finn comes out, and tells them Peter is up for visitors, and asks them to limit it to one at a time. Maxie tells Lulu to go. Finn asks if Maxie is okay, and she says she’s doing the best she can. He says it’s all any of them can do.
Ava asks Sibley how this works exactly. Sibley says Ava told her the building was important to Kiki. Ava says GH was like her second home. She was in medical school, and worked there part time. They see her memorial plaque from the ledge. Sibley asks if Ava brought something, and Ava gives her a necklace. She says she gave it to Kiki for her high school graduation. She wore it most of the time, even when she was furious with Ava. Sibley explains the difference between channeling and being a medium is. As a medium, she relays the messages around her. Like playing telephone, but the voices are louder. When she’s channeling, she has to open herself to another plane. When Ava speaks to her, she’ll be speaking directly to Kiki, and she might not like everything she hears. Ava says, Kiki wasn’t one to hold back. Sibley says she’ll be speaking directly to her daughter, providing Kiki avails herself of the opportunity. Shall they begin? She takes Ava’s hands, and says she needs total silence and the utmost concentration. She tells Ava to close her eyes, and open her mind. Think of the strongest memory of the relationship. Sibley asks if Kiki is there. She makes some weird movements, and Ava asks if it worked. Sibley breathes hard, and looks at Ava. Ava says, Sibley? and Sibley says, no, mother; it’s me. Ava says, Kiki?
Kim tells Julian that she had a session with Dr. Massey. He asks how it went, and she says it was difficult but she thinks she got some clarity. She told the doctor about what happened with Drew. She couldn’t believe what she was saying. It sounded crazy, like she was talking about someone else. Julian says, it’s her grief, that’s all. She says she was convinced having a child with Drew could fill the void left when Oscar died. She forgot the good things she still had in her life. Dr. Massey had her write them down, and the first thing she wrote was her relationship with him.
Hayden tells Drew that he has every reason not to trust her. He says at least they agree on that. She says her motives shouldn’t impact him or Aurora. They have the same logo on their stationery, but they never need to cross paths. He says he’d planned on building a legacy for his son, and now that Oscar is gone, he’s building it for his daughter. Hayden says, it sounds like Oscar was a great kid. She’s sorry for his loss. Jax comes to the door, and says he sees they’re getting reacquainted.
Nina tells Curtis that Drew must be surprised. Hayden exploited his amnesia, and planned on being his ex-wife. He’s sorry he didn’t tell her. Nina says that’s kind of his thing now. He says, what thing? and she says Jax hiring Hayden isn’t the only secret he’s keeping from his closest friends.
Finn meets Robert at Charlie’s. He tells Robert that Peter is expected to make a full recover. Robert says, Anna will be relieved, but Finn says, she doesn’t know. Peter insisted on keeping it to himself. Is Robert listening to him?
Lulu tells Peter that she’s relieved he’s okay. He says she can talk about Dante if she wants. She says she’s in shock. She still thought he was getting better, when he’s gotten worse. It’s disturbing. He’s sorry she had to learn this way, and she says he’s last person who needs to apologize. She knows it wasn’t his idea. He says, for what it’s worth, Maxie did believe she could bring Dante home to her. Maxie comes in, and Lulu says she needs time with Peter. Got it. She breezes past Maxie. Peter takes Maxie’s hand, and he says, it’s okay. Lulu is just upset. It’s not her fault. She says, yeah; it is.
Laura sees Lulu, and says, it’s okay. Lulu runs to her, and says, it’s not okay.
Ava asks if it’s Kiki, and Sibley/Kiki says, yes, mother; it’s her. Ava wants to believe her, but wonders how she can be sure it’s not some kind of scam. Indicating the necklace, Sibley/Kiki says she wore this a lot, but not the night she was killed. She took it off, and never wore it again after Ava drugged Sasha, and set up Sasha and Griff like they slept together. Ava says, everybody knew that, and Sibley/Kiki says, Ava came to Kelly’s, and she tried to slap Ava, but Ava caught her hand. She’d slapped Ava weeks before, and Ava had said she only gets one. Ava says she has so many questions. There’s so much she needs to say. Most important is, she’s sorry. Sibley/Kiki says she never wants contact again. She never wants to talk to Ava again. I’m wondering why Sibley claimed earlier that Kiki wished she had shown up at the dinner. Kind of contradictory.
Kim tells Julian that she was convinced a baby like Oscar could heal her, and lessen the pain. She didn’t stop to consider the pain she’d be putting him through. For him to walk in on her with Drew… Julian says she doesn’t need to rehash it, but she says she wants to face it, and figure out what’s left. Julian has been her rock, and she’s scared that, after what happened, things have changed forever. Julian says she has a right to feel that way. They have.
Finn tells Robert that he reluctantly has to honor Peter’s wishes. Under HIPPA laws, he can’t tell Anna the details about her son. Robert says he’s all for following the law, but when Anna finds out, she’ll go ballistic. Finn says his hands are tied, but Robert says, his aren’t.
Maxie says Peter could have died. He says, he didn’t. She says she should be thrilled; dancing for joy. He says he’d like to see that, and she tells him, don’t flirt. She’s too upset to appreciate it. She meddled when everyone told her not to. Now Dante is worse off, and the WSB will ship him God knows where. Even if they don’t, he’s not safe to be around Lulu and the kids. He says she cares, and Maxie says she wishes she could turn it off. He says it’s one reason he’s crazy about her, but she doesn’t think Lulu would agree.
Laura tells Lulu that she’s sorry. She had no idea it was that severe. Lulu says, the doctors knew. That’s why they were treating him. Maxie barged in, and ruined everything. Laura says she doesn’t really believe that, does she? and Lulu says, no. Laura says Maxie was misguided, but there’s a silver lining. Lulu finally has the answers to the questions that have been haunting her for months.
Ava says they have so much they need to say to each other, but Sibley/Kiki says, not really. Ava always found new and creative ways hurt her. She’s finally at peace, and does Ava know why? Because Kiki is no longer with her. Ava says she doesn’t mean that. Ryan said Kiki forgave her. Sibley/Kiki asks if Ava’s that desperate for absolution, that she’ll take the word of the man who murdered her. She can’t believe his lies, and take no responsibility for her actions. Ava says they can’t undo what’s done, but can they can move past the pain they caused each other. Kiki inflicted her share of pain too. Sibley/Kiki says Ava will never change. They’re done. Ava says, no, they’re not, but Sibley/Kiki says, yes, they are. Goodbye. Ava says, please wait, but Sibley says, sorry. Kiki is gone. She doesn’t want to talk to Ava anymore. Sibley warned her that she might not like what Kiki had to say. Ava asks if Sibley thinks she can scare her. All of a sudden, Kiki doesn’t want to talk, until she’s charged for a few more sessions. Sibley says, wait; she’s back. Ava laughs, but Sibley says, no. She has a message. Kiki wants to send a message to her sister. She wants Avery to know that she loves and misses her. No matter how she feels about Ava.
Ava asks if there’s anything else. The knife is already lodged in Ava’s heart; she might as well give twist. Sibley says she can’t control what the dead tell her. She and Kiki never met, but obviously she’s still hurting. Ava says it’s probably the most truthful thing Sibley has said all evening. Sibley says, maybe Kiki doesn’t want to talk now, but will eventually. If she rebuffs Ava again, Sibley won’t charge anything. Ava wants Kiki to know she’s changed. Maybe the article in Crimson will do the trick. Sibley says she’s going to clean up now. Ava says, while Sibley is there, there’s somebody else she’d like to contact. There’s someone else she needs to make amends with. She doesn’t have a personal item, but this place was important to him too. His name is Nikolas Cassadine.
Laura says Lulu has been in a holding pattern a long time, wondering if and when Dante would come back. Lulu says now the time is further off. Laura tells her that Dante did say not to wait for him. He must have realized it would be a long time, if ever, before he could come back to her and the kids. Lulu says she was holding out hope that he’d walk in the front door, and everything would go back to normal. Now she knows normal is never going to happen. Laura says at least now she knows she doesn’t have to be in limbo. She can make plans. Lulu says she sounds like Maxie. Laura says, Maxie wanted to help. She botched the landing, but meant well. How does Lulu think she knew to show up? Lulu says Maxie called her. Laura says Maxie knew Lulu needed her. She’s good like that. Maxie sees them.
Robert tells Finn there’s no law preventing him saying he received word on Peter’s condition. Finn says, if Anna shows up, it could backfire, and wreck any progress she and Peter have made in their relationship. God knows Robert doesn’t like Peter, but he doesn’t want to hurt Anna. Robert says he hates it when Finn is right, but it’s the perfect opportunity to bring her home. Isn’t it what Finn wants? Finn says he wants her home more than ever, and Robert says, of course (🍷). His ex is in town.
Drew says he’s not telling Jax how to run his half of the business, but he and Hayden have a complicated history. He thought it was in the past. Hayden says, far in the past. Drew asks if Jax is aware that Hayden was fired from GH for embezzlement. Jax says he is, and Drew asks why he hired her.
Nina says Valentin told her that he hire Curtis sot spy on Jax, and it was his idea Curtis take the position at Aurora. Curtis says he needs the extra money. The medical bills are piling up. Nina says he has options, and he appreciates her offering to pay, but he has to do it on his own. Besides, it’s a temporary gig. Jax is a shark, and he’s bound to find out eventually, but it would help a lot if Nina didn’t tell him herself. She says she has no intention of telling him what Curtis is up to. She has another job in mind for him.
Kim says she understands if Julian wants to break up. He says he doesn’t want to, but she says he told her things changed. He says they can’t go on pretending things are the same. She lost the most important person to her. His feelings haven’t changed. She says, even after Drew? and he says she messed up, but she owned up to it, and she’s trying to do better. He’s messed up plenty. A lot of people are eager to remind him, but he’s not the cut and run type. He stays and fights. She says she won’t run either.
Maxie asks if it’s safe to approach. Lulu says, yeah, and Laura says she’ll let them talk. Maxie sits next to Lulu, and says Lulu was right. She shouldn’t have gone. Lulu says she shouldn’t have snapped. Maxie is just looking out for her, like always. She was just upset that Maxie did what she wished she could have done. She found Dante, and got the answers Lulu needed, even if they’re not the ones she wanted. Maxie says she’s not mad? Lulu says, no, and Maxie says, thank God. She despises fighting with Lulu. Lulu says she’ll need Maxie more than ever to get through the next phase of her life. They hug, and say they love each other.
Finn asks how Robert knows about Hayden, and Robert asks if Finn doesn’t think he does his research. When Finn and Anna started playing house, he had a dossier put together. Finn says, of course (🍷). Robert says, Hayden’s name leapt off the page. He knew she’d resurfaced and was involved with Jax apparently. Finn says apparently Robert thinks she has another agenda. Robert asks, does he? Finn says, with Hayden, anything is possible.
Jax tells Drew that he’s a big believer in second chances. Hayden says she is too. Jax says they all should be. She won’t be doing any finances on Drew’s end; no data, nothing. Drew says, understood, but he’d appreciate it if Jax doesn’t drive Aurora into bankruptcy. Jax says, duly noted. As Jax leaves, Drew tells him to watch his back and his wallet. Hayden walks out with him.
Curtis tells Nina that he’s confused. Nina wants him to pass along the same information about Jax to her that he’s giving to Valentin? She says, but she wants it first. He’ll be triple-crossing Jax. It’s simple. Valentin is leaving her out of the loop, and she needs to be in it. Are they clear? Curtis says, what could go wrong?
Hayden thanks Jax for standing up for her. He wants to be clear. If he’d only hired her as CFO, she’d be out on the street. She says, but she’s not. Why is she there? He says they’re going to keep poking and prodding, and Valentin and his house of cards are going to come tumbling down. Then, they’ll both get what they want.
Ava asks Sibley if there’s anything, but Sibley says, sorry. There could be many explanations, but she can’t feel any presence from the other side. I’m guessing we’ll see a new Nikolas soon.
Tomorrow, Diane has good news, Carly ask if there’s a problem with Dev and Josslyn, and Sonny tells Ava do it again and see what happens.
The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – The Reunion – Part One
Andy FaceTimes with Anderson Cooper, saying, there’s trouble in Beverly Hills. He tells Anderson that LVP isn’t there, but Camille is. They’re breaking a lot of news today.
There’s the usual schmoozing before air time. Andy welcomes us. Denise is excited for her first reunion, and Kyle says, that’s such a newbie thing to say. He tells Teddi what a difference a year makes. She says her dad told her not to have her boobs hanging out, and Mellencamps don’t cry. Andy says, obviously someone is missing. LVP said she’s skipping the reunion and not returning to the show. He says it brings to mind season three, where Adrienne Maloof didn’t show. We flash back to LVP at the same reunion, saying she thinks that’s a mistake. She should have come and cleared up her mess. Andy says LVP’s final act as a cast member was telling a reporter she’s not showing up. Kyle thinks she gave the interview yesterday, knowing if she didn’t show up, she’d be fired. She asks if Andy thinks she wanted to show up when she and Kim were on the outs. He says LVP had said the objective of a reunion is to reunite, and she had no inclination to reunite with the women who have been harassing her for ten months. Kyle says LVP hasn’t seen them since Denise’s wedding. LisaR says LVP pinched her butt, and they were laughing. We flash back to that.
Andy says a source close to LVP said, she was burned at the stake, nailed to the cross, and stoned by her co-stars. Erika says, get of the cross; we need the wood. I’m not impressed, since she stole that line from Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. Andy tells them a source said LVP always wins. Kyle thinks it’s a mistake for her not to be there. They could have worked it out, even if it meant agreeing to disagree. Dorit says she doesn’t think LVP is capable of that. Andy says she drew a line in the sand, and said she wasn’t caving on the issue. Teddi feels like there’s a chance she’ll show up for dramatics. LisaR says she keeps looking at the door. Andy says he knows Kyle is holding out hope. She’s had LVP’s birthday present since September. Andy says, if she doesn’t come, he’s opening it. Denise asks Kyle why she thinks LVP didn’t show up. Kyle thinks she doesn’t want to face them because she’s been unmasked. She was called out on what happened at Vanderpump Dogs. Why do that to someone you care about? She’s been focusing on the Radar article, so she doesn’t have to talk about what actually happened. Erika says she’s expecting a stunt, and will be fully disappointed if it doesn’t happen. A limo pulls up, trying to make us think LVP decided to show, and Camille gets out, along with friend Kimber.
Andy tells us that LisaR and Harry got in a heated Twitter battle with Nicolette Sheridan about Michael Bolton. LisaR had said Nicolette went off with Michael after a concert. LisaR says Harry was in another city, felt strange, and had to go home. When he got back, he found a love note in the trash. Nicolette had slept with Michael Bolton that night, and without Michael, she wouldn’t be with Harry. Nicolette said it was fake news. LisaR reminds us that Denise’s husband was married to Nicolette. Andy says she’s making a compelling case for Nicolette to be on the show.
Andy says, Denise swears like a trooper, and drinks tequila like the world is not enough, thinking he’s being funny by referring to a couple of her movies. We see clips of her throughout he season. My favorite is when she talks about the women dressing up all the time in an interview, and says they’re lucky she put an effing bra on. Andy is amazed how chill she is, and asks what Charlie’s reaction to the show is. She says he was supportive when she told him that she was doing it, but he hasn’t been super happy about some of the things she’s said. Like the time she talked about having one of his ladies of the night to Thanksgiving. Denise says, she was lovely, and we flash back to that story, and Denise saying, even a hooker deserves have Thanksgiving dinner. She told Charlie she didn’t think his past was a secret, and he’d said he was in a different place now. She told him people love him because he’s honest, and his ladies were a big part of his past.
Andy asks Erika about Denise’s laid back sense of style, and Erika says, everyone should be themselves. Denise says she dresses up, but day-to-day, she’s a jeans, tank top, and T-shirt person. She considered the shorts she wore in the Bahamas fancy. A viewer says she’s been through a lot, but never seems like a victim. How is she so good at hanging with crazy? Denise says Charlie is her daughters dad, and they’ve been divorced for fourteen years. She didn’t want her daughters privy to the negative in his life. When he was diagnosed with HIV, they didn’t know. She moved into his neighborhood, and he knew he could call her any time, and she’d be there. A lot of people judged her for that, but she wanted him to be the best dad he could be because she has an amazing relationship with her father. She’s no saint, and she’s made mistakes, but she thinks it’s best not to talk negatively about her children’s father. Ultimately, they’re the ones who suffer. Andy asks LisaR about Denise, since they’ve been friends since the earth cooled. LisaR says Denise is a saint, and she has a lot of respect for her, dealing with a difficult time being so public. Denise says, it was just a snippet of what was really going on. Andy says it struck him that Denise could have taken Charlie to the cleaners. She says they had no prenup, and he got Two and a Half Men while they were married. Andy says she could have asked for a piece, since he had ownership. Denise adds, he made a lot of money. Andy asks how Aaron gets along with Charlie, and Denise says, they do get along. Out of respect, Aaron called Charlie to let him know when they were getting married.
Andy asks about Eloise, and Denise says she has a chromosome disorder that caused delays in speech and development. Erika asks how old Eloise was when they found out, and Denise says it was about two years ago; she’s eight now. She says it’s difficult to diagnose, and it was hard to see it in black and white when she saw the medical report. She tears up, saying, a two-year-old can talk, but Eloise can’t, even though she wants to. She’s a free spirit and happy. She doesn’t know. Andy asks what Eloise has taught her, and Denise says, you can communicate without verbally speaking. Eloise is a bright light. When she hears music, she dances, and doesn’t care who’s watching. Denise has to keep an eye on her 24/7 though. She’s taken swim lessons since she was a toddler, but wouldn’t be able to save herself. Dorit says, it’s hard to hear, since Jagger was a delayed speaker. He’s five now, and did reach milestones. She understands. As a mother, your biggest job is to protect and take care of your kids. Denise says, kids are mean, and it starts young. Dorit says Denise is a great mom.
Andy says, chaos and anxiety follow Kyle wherever she goes. We see clips of her life, and her saying she always feels her life is like whack-a-mole, which I totally understand. She has an anxiety disorder, and automatically imagines the worst. Sarah from Colorado asks if LisaR regrets taking Kyle along on her mammogram, since she suffered so much anxiety, but LisaR says, no. She thinks everyone should have one. She says she got positive feedback, but then people were saying Kyle’s appointment was possibly set up for the show. Kyle says she gets one every October, and was scheduled for the following week. Since both of them were expected, the doctor put time aside for Kyle, so she figured she might as well do it, since they give the results on the spot. A viewer asks if Dorit’s gigantic breast implants affect her mammograms. Dorit asks if they’ve seen gigantic. I agree. They’re always falling out, but I wouldn’t say they’re gigantic. Andy says LisaR said it was like a check-up for her implants. LisaR says she also gets an ultrasound. We see a clip of the doctor saying there’s no sign of a leak or rupture. LisaR says she wondered if it was okay to show it, but it’s the absolute truth. You need to be more careful when you have implants.
Andy asks Teddi how she helped Kyle when she was spiraling. Teddi says they actually went to her therapist together, and we see a clip of them. It’s not like talk therapy though. More like some kind of relaxation therapy. Kyle says her anxiety got so bad, Mauricio almost had to call 911.
Andy reminds us that Erika had toasted, all hail the true queen, Kyle. Erika says look at them today. Kyle is the queen. She says look who showed up. Dorit says Kyle is one of the originals, and the leader of the group. Erika says Kyle binds them, and Kyle thanks them. I watch her head get bigger.
In the hallway, Camille tells Kimber, it’s like walking into the lion’s den with these women. Everyone greets her all fake happy. Andy says an original Housewife is back. Camille doesn’t know if she should be happy or terrified. Andy congratulates her on the wedding, and we flash back to that. Andy says he wants what Mauricio had at dinner in Hawaii. So does everyone else, me included. We flash back to Mauricio wanting to tell a joke, and then forgetting it. Andy says the crew was laughing so hard, they had a problem with the audio. A viewer asks what the best part of Camille’s honeymoon in Switzerland was. She says, everything. She loves skiing, and they did a lot of that. We see photos of Camille’s temporary home, and Andy points out that the house is 1200 square feet. Camille says they’re still in it. It’s got great views, and it’s comfortable. Andy reminds Camille about how she griped about 3500 square feet in NYC. Camille says she thought it would be uncomfortable with two small kids. How times have changed. She went from a grand estate to 3500 square feet. We see clips of that. Andy says he was talking to Denise about raising kids with an ex. Camille says her mother watched Denise’s interviews, and said, that’s the classy way to do it; make it about the kids. Andy asks why she kept the name Grammer, and Camille says, for her kids. Denise says she couldn’t wait to get rid of her married name. Camille says she took the name off of her social media, but it’s still on her passport. Andy asks how David feels about that, and she says, he has no problem; he understands. Andy brings up her reaction to Denise not having a prenup. Camille says she was married for thirteen years. Denise says she was married just under five. I’ll bet it felt like a lot longer though. People think she should have asked for half. He was almost bankrupt before they married. Camille says she felt like she worked hard. She wasn’t sitting around eating bonbons. Dorit asks if Denise likes bonbons, but she says she’s never had one.
10 minutes later. While getting her makeup retouched, Camille says she didn’t expect that. In another room, Denise says wait until they get into Camille’s stuff. She’s already being mean. Camille can’t figure out why Denise is bothered by the money thing. The makeup artist tells Denise, maybe Camille isn’t happy, and Denise is getting laid. Teddi says she has hers scheduled for after this.
Andy tells us just because the women are proper in the streets, doesn’t mean they’re prudes in the sheets. He loves that rhyming stuff. We flash back to all the sex talk this season. Andy tells Denise that viewer Zoe has a question. Denise bets she does. He asks why it was okay for Aaron to get the happy ending, when Denise could do it herself. Denise says she does do that, but he’d never had one, and it was a wild night. Andy said he inferred that she was an old lady. Denise says he was mortified and embarrassed. Andy asks Erika how Tom felt when she said he probably paid for sex as a young man. She says he used to go to Vegas, win money, and the hotel would send up back scratchers. A viewer asks Denise how big is it? and Denise says she only said something once. We go back and count, and it’s like, four. Kyle says compare it to her shoe, and Denise says it’s bigger than that. Andy wants clarification. Denise says he was embarrassed at first, but now he’s glad. Denise asks where Andy falls, and he says nowhere near Aaron. Erika says Denise is the MVP of the group. They discuss her posting a pic online of him at full-mast under the sheets. She says she took it down because the kids saw something. Andy asks how LisaR and Harry keep it spicy after 22 years. She says they like to do some kinky sh*t. #WhatDidHarryDo She says she took a strip class, but all you have to do is bend over. Good to know. Sounds like a lot less work.
We revisit the battle between Teddi and LVP. Like we haven’t seen enough of that. Andy says, from Teddi’s point of view, what happened off camera before the season started? She wants to apologize again first. She should have never gotten involved. Dorit asks why she did. She says she was told that since she wasn’t getting along with Dorit, and LVP was friends with her, it was less weird for her to bring it up, and to figure out a way to make it happen. She was told the dog was in a kill shelter from John Blizzard. She says there was so much going into it; three and four way calls. Denise asks, why get involved? and Teddi says she made a mistake. She was angry at Dorit last year for what happened when they were leaving the reunion. Dorit refused to go to lunch if Teddi was there, and Teddi acted out. Andy doesn’t understand why Teddi didn’t talk to LVP directly. Why was she speaking to the employees? Teddi says she was going there because her kids go to a class nearby. She didn’t hang out with John. Andy says that makes it all the more weird. Teddi says she didn’t think twice, because John said he was talking to LVP. Dorit says it looks bad that she went along; she’s not dismissing Teddi’s bad behavior. Andy reminds them that Erika said Teddi wasn’t to be trusted last season, and we flash back to the previous reunion. Erika says she didn’t realize how much Teddi disliked Dorit.
Andy says for someone who’s the queen of accountability, it’s amzing that Teddi had such a lapse. This is definite shade, and I’m wondering if Andy isn’t just a little pissed that he lost LVP from the Housewives franchise. Dorit says she wondered why, if Teddi didn’t want to go through with it, she didn’t stop it when she was at Vanderpump Dogs. Instead she made Dorit the scapegoat. She thinks it wasn’t that Teddi didn’t want to do it to Dorit, but she didn’t want to be the only one to do it. That hurt.
Next time – Part Two – Andy stirs the pot by asking why the women think Erika doesn’t want to be around them, Camille says they want her to jump on the hate bandwagon. Denise suggests Camille think before she speaks, and Camille walks off.
💍 Another Way To 90…
The Other Way in a nutshell.
👣 A Perfect Fit…
For a gone Tuesday.