Tag Archives: Game of Thrones

May 20, 2019 – Finn Finds the Ring, VanderReunion Concludes, GH Fashion, LVP Rules, the Throne Game Lingers & Replacement Ad


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

The Ball begins. The nurses sing You Got the Best of My Love, with Epiphany, Deanna, and Amy doing solos. Nurses we’ve never seen before do some wicked dancing. I love the Ball, and seeing everyone do something they don’t normally. I’m really looking forward to Chase. Confetti falls at the end of the number to much applause.

Lucy welcomes everyone, and thanks them. She hopes they brought their wallets. Every dime goes to fight HIV and AIDS. She tells them fasten their seatbelts. They’re in for a wild ride.

Ava asks Scotty why he thought Lucy would be there. He asks why does she think? Doc says, it’s becoming obvious. Scotty says he saw Doc sneaking off with Lucy. Ava says, that’s odd, since she was with him when a staff member said someone fainted on the red carpet. She takes it that was Lucy. Doc says Lucy was wearing a lacy negligee, and Scotty says it’s a good outfit to faint in. Ava says he burst in like he expected to say, ah-ha! Caught you. Scotty says why wouldn’t he? Doc is all wrong for Ava.

Mike and Yvonne thank Sonny for including them. Mike thinks it’s the best way to celebrate their engagement, show off his fiancé. Carly looks at the ring.

Chase and Willow join Finn, who’s looking glum at the bar. Chase asks if he’s okay, and he says he’s fine. Chase asks Willow for some privacy, and tells Finn to propose without the ring. While Anna is saying yes, he’ll arrest Robert for stealing it in the first place.

Neil sees Alexis, and sits with her. She says she had no idea they’d be sitting at the same table. He’s probably the only person who can keep her from tearing Shiloh’s head off. Neil is surprised Shiloh is there, and Alexis points him out. Sam is taking pictures, and Shiloh says he didn’t take her for being a selfie girl. She says she’s not, but just got caught up in the moment.

Spinelli tells Jason the surveillance equipment is state of the art. They have all that they need to hear everything the instant it’s happening. Jason gets a text from Sam, saying she’s at the Ball with Shiloh. Spinelli says, excellent. The plan is working. In the meantime, they have to make sure no other members are at the DOD house.

Kristina suggests watching a movie, but Josslyn doesn’t care. She says Kristina doesn’t have to babysit her. Kristina says Josslyn is doing her favor. She doesn’t want to feel like a coward for skipping the Ball, but she doesn’t feel like a fancy party, so she appreciates keeping Josslyn company. Josslyn says, bring on the popcorn.

Jax tells Carly, Josslyn is fine; he just texted her. Cameron arrives, and asks if Josslyn is coming. Jax says she thought about it, but decided not to. Carly thinks, it’s a little soon after Oscar. She’ll tell Josslyn that he asked about her.

Felicia tells Anna that she didn’t say who her date was. Finn or Robert? Anna says she came with Finn. She loves Finn. She doesn’t know what Robert is doing, but it has to stop.

Mac sees Robert, and says he wasn’t expecting Robert to show up with Finn and Anna. He doesn’t think they did either. Robert insists it was a coincidence.

Mike introduces Yvonne to Bobbie, who tells them, best wishes and congratulations. She admires Yvonne’s ring.

Finn tells Chase, if everything works out, and Anna says yes, all is forgiven. Chase asks, what if she doesn’t? and Finn says he might not have to arrest Robert anyway. Finn sees Yvonne showing off the ring.

Alexis introduces Neil to Jax. Jax asks how he knows Alexis, and Alexis says, he doesn’t. Not in the way Jax thinks. It’s just a coincidence they’re sitting together. He’s a therapist. Jax asks if he’s seeing Alexis, and she says, yes; no. He’s treating her. This isn’t social. Well, it is, but… She shrugs. Neil takes it that Jax is an old friend. Jax says, his ex-wife actually.

Finn is sorry to take Sonny away from his family, but Sonny says whatever he’s going through seems important. Finn says, a little. The lady with Sonny’s father, the ring she’s wearing, it’s his. It’s special. He hates to do this, but he needs it back.

Anna wants to talk to Robert in private. He says, sounds important. She says, it is, and it’s not a joke.

Cameron sees a llama eating at the craft service table. He calls out, anybody lose a llama? He tells the llama, hold on one sec. He puts his guitar in the corner. He doesn’t want it messed up if this goes disastrous, which it probably will. Cameron doesn’t want to interrupt the llama’s snack, but someone could startle him, and he could get hurt. He’s going to grab the llama’s rope, and find out where he belongs. Cameron takes the llama’s lead, and pets him. He says, pretty weird, being backstage. The llama must feel out of place. Him too. He had this friend, and he died. It just seems so brutally unfair. Why is he the lucky one and gets to be alive? He guesses the question he should be asking is, what does he do with the life he has, and make the most of his chances? He’s going to start by finding out where the llama belongs. Felix comes in, and says, Budgie! He tells Cameron that Budgie thinks he’s a llama, and wandered off. They were frantic. He tells Budgie that his trailer awaits. Cameron tells Budgie, nice talking to you.

Ava says she can’t tell Scotty how much his loyalty and friendship mean to her. He says she wants him to keep out of her business. She says she and Doc know what they’re doing. Scotty says, the last time she said that, she ended up with Ryan. See how that turned out? Doc suggests they not miss any more of the Ball. They leave, and Scotty says, Lucy! the way Seinfeld used to say, Newman!

Sam tells Shiloh he looks good in his tux. At their table, Chase asks how Willow is holding up. she says, it would be a perfect night, but for Shiloh being here. At another table, Michael tells Sasha about being one of Milo’s Magic Wands. He didn’t pick the name. Sasha asks if Valentin performs, and he says, usually fully clothed.

Anna asks Robert why he ambushed her. He says he had to find some way to get in, but she’s not buying it. She says he purposely made it look like they came together. He says, so? and she says they didn’t do that. Finn is her date, and he’s being exasperating as an ex-husband.

Peter is glad he ran into Sam. He wanted to tell her about her sister Molly pitching an idea to him for an exposé. As in depth and hard-hitting of a piece as Lulu did on Ryan Chamberlain.

Scotty tells Lucy that she was supposed to get Doc in a compromising position. She tells him, don’t blame her. He was supposed to get Ava up to the suite sooner. She’s still just as determined to consciously uncouple Doc and Ava, but her first priority is the Ball.

Doc tells Ava that they should have expected something like that. She says maybe they would have if the relationship was real, and not a brilliant ruse to get Ryan out of hiding.

Anna says Robert sat next to her, and he says it was the seat he was assigned. She says he could have switched with Felicia or Mac. He says she’s right; he’s a bad boy. Can he go back now? She says not until they’ve dealt with the actual problem. He asks what that would be, and she says, even with all their history, especially with all their history, he can’t expect her try again with him.

Mike introduces Yvonne to Epiphany, who comments on what a rock Yvonne has. Yvonne says, it’s beautiful, and Epiphany says not as beautiful as her. Mike smiles proudly.

Kristina tells Josslyn, maybe a comedy? Josslyn says, this is a comedy. Kristina says, it’s not funny though; is it? Josslyn sees where it’s supposed to be or would be. Kristina says, if they weren’t both miserable? She knows she’s said it already, but it’s just them right now. She’s sorry about Oscar. Josslyn thanks her, and says, it actually helps when you’re hurting to know people care. Kristina wishes she’d realized that sooner. She could have saved them, and herself, a lot of trouble.

Jason and Spinelli go to the DOD house. They walk in, and Spinelli says Jason wasn’t kidding. They really do leave their door unlocked. Jason says, it’s Shiloh’s policy – except when he’s with Sam. He tells Spinelli that everything has to be perfect. Sam is setting Shiloh up tonight.

Sam and Shiloh sit at Peter’s table, and he introduces Shiloh to Lulu. Sam says Peter really blindsided her, saying Molly was writing a story. Lulu asks what it’s about, and Peter says, it’s a new organization that just opened up in Port Charles. It’s called Dawn of Day.

Peter says Molly is still in college, and will need mentoring. Lulu says she’d be happy to take Molly under her wing, but she knows nothing about DOD. Peter says Shiloh can fill her in. He’s their leader. Shiloh says, there is no leader per se. Maxie comes by, and tells him, save it. She asks why Sam is with him. Sam says she doesn’t judge Maxie’s dates, so she’d appreciate the same from Maxie. Maxie says, he only has one name, and it means he who has been sent. Sam says, it’s just a name, and Maxie says, it’s a perfect name for the leader of a cult.

Josslyn is checking out the Nurses Ball on her phone. Kristina says, any scandals? and Josslyn says, it wouldn’t be the Nurses Ball without them. Kristina looks at the phone, and asks, what is Sam doing there with Shiloh?    

Spinelli tells Jason, it’s looking good. They’re getting signals from all devices. Jason’s phone rings, and they jet out of the house. Jason says, it’s Kristina. He asks if she’s okay, and she says, Sam is at the Nurses Ball with Shiloh. Jason tells her, calm down, but she says Jason has to get Sam away from him. Jason says, trust him. It will all work out. She says, it won’t, and hangs up. Honestly, you’d think Kristina could figure this out.

Chase tells Willow that he has to prepare for his performance, but not to let Shiloh get to her. Or Nina. He leaves, and Sasha asks what he meant about Nina. Willow says she hasn’t been asked back to the elementary school. Sasha says, she was fired because of Nina? Willow says, there were several reasons, but one of them was Nina. Michael says there are a lot of private schools there. He’s sure she can get references from community leaders. She says she couldn’t impose, and Sasha tells her, don’t argue. Michael is a relentlessly decent guy. Resistance is futile.

Nina wonders if Michael can get Sasha to stay in Port Charles. Valentin didn’t realize things were happening so quickly between Sasha and Michael. Nina says it happened between them quickly. Maybe it’s an inherited trait. They kiss.

Robert says Anna thinks he wants them try again? She says, don’t deny it. She loves him, and always will, but she has to say no. She can’t marry him. She’s in love with Finn. Robert gets that, and she tells him, stop pursuing her. What they had is in the past. She walks away.

Sonny and Finn approach Mike. Sonny tells Mike, there’s a problem with the ring. It’s a fake. Mike bought a bum ring. Mike says he didn’t. Is Sonny sure? Sonny says, positive. Mike says he can’t take the ring back. It will break Yvonne’s heart. Finn understands, and has a suggestion. He shows Mike the replacement ring, and asks what he thinks. Sonny says, it’s a beautiful ring; the real deal. He can just explain the situation to Yvonne, and everything will be okay.

Lucy hopes everyone is having fun. She wants them to welcome back the next performer. Everyone has really anticipated his performance. Last year, he brought down the house. This detective has moves so arresting, he makes you want to write bad checks. Chase sings Something Just Like This. He’s so good, and definitely has the moves. He motions for Willow to come up. She shakes her head, but he brings her up on stage. Even though they didn’t rehearse, and as far as I know, have never even danced together, they dance perfectly. Sam smiles. Shiloh, not so much. Chase and Willow kiss.

Finn asks if he can talk to Robert, and Robert says, if he must. He says, despite Robert’s best efforts to sabotage him, he’s still proposing to Anna with the ring he intended to give her. Robert says, goody; he found it. He doesn’t suppose he can have the one back he replaced it with. Finn says, if only he could. Robert says, let him guess. Finn lost it. Finn says he knows exactly where it is, but don’t worry. Robert will be pleased to know it went to a good cause.

Yvonne says she likes the ring Mike gave her, but this one is so much better. Mike says, that’s all that matters. Sonny says they have to go back to Turning Woods, and Carly says they’ll walk Yvonne and Mike out. Mike hangs back, and says he and Sonny did a number last year, right? Sonny says they sure did, and Mike says Summer Wind. It was a good night. Sonny says, the best, and they hug. I wish they’d sing again, but I guess that’s not happening.

Lucy sees Cameron, and asks if he spoke with Josslyn. He says, no, and Lucy says he should know she’s not performing. Is he okay? He says he’s good to go, and she tells him, the show has to go on. She thanks him for saving her llama.

Everyone applauds as Chase and Willow go back to their table. Willow says, it was amazing. She had so much fun, but he’d better watch out. Groupies of all ages will be throwing themselves at him. He says, of all the screaming fangirls in the world, there’s only one woman for him.

Carly tells Jax that Josslyn said he looked handsome. He says, she’s a brave girl, and Carly says, the bravest. He thinks they should honor that courage, and not go home to check on her. She says they’re still texting though, right? He says, every half hour, and she says, his turn.

Cameron goes to Sonny’s house. Josslyn says his tux looks great. He says, no disasters yet. He has an Uber outside. The driver is really nice, and said she’d wait if Josslyn wants to change and come. Josslyn says, thanks, but she’d feel like more of a loser if she showed up and didn’t sing. She can’t. She thought about it, and even tried practicing, but it’s a duet. She can’t sing it without Oscar. Cameron gets it. He didn’t come to guilt her, but he brought her a message from Oscar.

In the hallway, Shiloh tells Sam that he needed a breather from her friend. Sam says Maxie isn’t so much a friend. Shiloh says, she called DOD a cult (like that’s never happened before), but he can’t hold Sam responsible. She gets his mission. Kristina appears, and tells Shiloh, get the hell away from her.

Spinelli and Jason get back to the MetroCourt. Spinelli says, mission accomplished. They have every inch of DOD wired, but they can’t be sure Shiloh will incriminate himself. Jason says, it doesn’t matter. This ends tonight.

Lucy talks about Robin. Robert tells Finn that Anna is about to speak. He’s Robin’s father, and he’s joining her on stage. Lucy says they love Robin, and miss her, but they’re fortunate that, in her absence, they have her also extraordinary mother there to tell them the importance of what tonight is all about. Anna takes the stage. She says her daughter is a woman of passion, a fighter, and a healer. Passion, fight, and healing are what the Nurses Ball is all about. Robin was diagnosed with HIV in 1995; a death sentence at that time. It’s taken the lives of so many loved ones, in particular, Stone, but her daughter’s death sentence became a life sentence. Where there’s life, there’s hope, and she doesn’t want them to forget, that’s the true meaning behind tonight – hope.

In the wings, Robert tells Finn that, Anna is one incredible woman. He’d better make her happy. All of a sudden, the ring rolls out and stops at her feet. Finn looks at Robert.

Tomorrow, Finn proposes to Anna, Lucy says something fishy is going on, and Sonny tells Shiloh to stay away from his daughter.

Vanderpump Rules – The Reunion – Part Three

We rewind a little to where Andy asks James if he’s still helping his family. Kristen says they act like he’s the only one helping his family. Katie says she’s been going through a helluva ride, and his parents got divorced, poor thing. Kristen says, he was raised by effing a-holes, but Lisa tells her, don’t talk like that; it’s going too far. James walks out, saying, he’s not listening to sh*t about his family without ripping someone’s head off. Lisa tells the group, take a breath. They’re not doing themselves any favors. Andy says Kristen keeps jumping into every question.

Lisa tells James, don’t walk away. He’ll lose the battle. He says he’s already won. She says he’s part of the show. He needs to pull himself together, and defend himself. Katie says people hate her because she stood up for herself. People told her to kill herself because she did something to James’s family. Lala says they need to quit talking about people’s parents. Lisa comes back with James, and asks if they’re good now.

Andy wisely changes the subject. He asks about Lala’s anxiety attacks, and she says they were driven by alcohol. We flash back to her freak-out at dinner in Mexico. She says she wanted to crawl out of her own skin. She wasn’t near Rand, her mom was far away, and her dad was gone. Andy says Scheana claimed everyone was up Lala’s ass, and treated her like she could do no wrong even before her dad passed away. He asks if Scheana has any examples, except for Lala not wanting to make out with her. We flash back to Scheana griping about that. Scheana thinks she had some insecurities, and felt like all of Lala’s other friends came first. Lala says she never wants Scheana to feel like her friendship is on the back burner. If she needs to try harder, she’ll make that happen.

Andy asks how Schwartz felt when he and Katie took the lead in the controversy surrounding inviting white Kanye to Mexico. Schwartz says he didn’t think it would be a problem. He thought enough time had passed, that it was safe. He was caught in the moment; he’s a softie. Andy asks how it made James feel when Tom got the brunt of the blame. Ariana says, in reality, they agreed. Schwartz says he knew he effed up, and it was a moment of cowardice. Katie’s voice is scary, and he didn’t know what to do. Andy asks why James would want to go somewhere, that clearly, several people didn’t want him to. He says he as curious. He’d been on all the trips. The Miami trip was fantastic. The group thought he’d be the liability of the Hawaii trip. We flash back to Jax saying James is obnoxious. James says he laughed when Jax got arrested. He wasn’t the liability. He became an international DJ when he worked in Mexico. It was all happening. He thought he’d earned the right to go on the next trip, and at the time, it hurt his feelings.

Moving on. Andy brings up Katie and Tom’s fight, where Tom blamed Katie for James losing his job and called her a bully. He asks if Tom thinks she’s responsible for James losing his job. James says, it’s irrelevant. It doesn’t mean what he did was okay, or he’s right, but Tom was pissed at the ultimatum and outcome. Tom says he thought if Katie hadn’t said anything, James wouldn’t have lost his job. It was bottled up in him. Schwartz says, back in the day, she said come pretty rough things. We flash back to Katie calling Lala a whore, and telling Schwartz, no wonder his d*ck doesn’t work. Schwartz says she’s a changed person. She’s come a long way, and matured. He loves her. Andy says Katie’s go-to insult is critiquing his d*ck. We see a clip of Schwartz saying he has a classic penis. Andy says they’re going to say it so much, it won’t work. Schwartz says it’s a nice, old-fashioned penis. Andy says Katie was penis shaming.

Andy welcome Stassi’s beau, Beau. He asks Beau if his suit is more comfortable than the dinosaur outfit. Beau says he has the dinosaur costume with him, but Stassi said. We go down the Memory Lane of Stassi’s exes, and see clips of their various antics. Jax flipped off everyone at SUR. Frank threatened to pull a customer’s underwear over his head. Patrick made unwanted comments on Lisa’s ass. Andy asks, where does Beau rank? He says Lisa loves him, and even tweeted that she loves her some Beau. Lisa says he’s lucky to have Stassi too. She’s bright and beautiful, but with her insecurities, thinks she’ll screw up. She wants Stassi to get it out of her head. Andy says Stassi put Patrick on a pedestal, and then said in her podcast that he’d cheated. Katie is shocked, saying she didn’t know about this. Stassi says the day she was moving from NYC to L.A,, she was using Patrick’s computer, and found texts between him and some, like, model that were very explicit. She didn’t want to just slink out, since she’d just told everyone she was in a new relationship. She was mortified. Beau is happy she did it. Andy asks if she made Beau happy, and Beau says, she did. Andy asks if Beau watched show when they started dating. Beau says he watched the pilot to see what he was getting into. Andy asks if it didn’t scare him, and Beau says, eff yeah. Kristen set them up. She and Beau met when she was doing an independent film, and they kissed. We see some clips from The Loneliness of the Long Distance Dreamer. Andy asks if it went further, but that’s a no. Jax says, this is the most incestuous group ever.

Andy asks about the first night in Mexico, when Stassi was arguing about going to bed. How does Beau keep cool when Stassi goes off the deep end? Beau says he gets help from friends. Andy asks what triggers Stassi’s rages? and Beau says, alcohol, Adderall past influence in relationships. He’s done nothing to make her think he’d do something shady. Andy says Stassi gave him a hard time at the club for encouraging her to have fun with her friends. Stassi says, all the girls were dancing, and she had on a maxi dress with oatmeal-colored Spanx that she’d cut the crotch out of so she could use the bathroom. She didn’t want everyone to look up and see. She didn’t feel hot, and Beau annoyed her when he kept telling her to go. She said no. He says he didn’t know she was wearing oatmeal-colored Spanx with the crotch cut out. Stassi says it’s embarrassing to say. Andy reminds Beau that he said he felt like a battered boyfriend, which was brutal. It was just over and over again.  The dark passenger snapped at the club, and his bottled feelings came out at the hotel. The old stuff and Stassi’s insecurities combined with alcohol makes the dark passenger come out. He doesn’t think it’s some deep persona thing. Andy asks who’s scarier; the dark passenger or tequila Katie. Schwartz thinks it’s Katie, but says the two of them could take over the world. Andy asks if it makes Stassi feel at risk of losing Beau if she doesn’t change her behavior. Stassi says, yes. She wants to find out what’s making her life this. She’s hurting her friends, Beau, and herself. She’s not taking Adderall again. Andy asks Beau if her behavior has changed, and they both say yes. Andy brings up Stassi’s mother telling her not to be herself or she’ll mess it up. Beau says he had no idea why her mother would say something like that. Stassi says it sticks with her, and she thinks something’s totally wrong with herself. Andy adds insult to injury by reminding Stassi that her mother also said she hoped Stassi would grow up to be half the woman Kristen is. We flash back to that. Stassi says she didn’t know about it, and it was hard to watch. Andy asks where she and her mother stand now. Stassi says they didn’t speak for eight months, but just this past weekend, she went to her sister’s bridal shower, and they talked. Her mother apologized and took ownership of what she’d done, and they both cried. It was awesome, and she’s happy about it, since she missed her mom. Everyone gets a little teary. Well, probably not James.

Andy says Jax seemed freaked out when the women arrived at the guy’s weekend. Jax says he felt guilty just being in the same room with them. He knows just because things are okay now, he still has work to do, and he’s treading water. He told Beau that the girls would probably be mad if they tell them, but they’ll find out anyway, so they’d better. Stassi says it was the right choice, but she wanted to FaceTime with those skanks. We move on to Kristen, and flash back to her freefalling in wine country. Andy says she got triggered by James DJing a party at PUMP. Does that really affect her? She wishes it didn’t. She thought she was fine. James tells her to get over it. He says she’s obsessed with him, and she has to get over him. Stassi sticks by saying she thinks it was really Carter that was the problem, and doesn’t think Kristen is obsessed with James. He triggered it, but they all knew what was going on with Carter. We see clips of Kristen complaining. Kristen insists it wasn’t about her and Carter, and she got upset when Stassi intermixed the two. Andy asks what issue broke Carter and Kristen up, and she says he didn’t respect her enough to pay his way. She felt taken advantage of. Beau thinks that Kristen vents so much about the bad, it’s all they hear. They never heard the good stuff. Andy says the girls accused Kristen of fighting in private, and acting like everything was okay in public. She says Carter was trying to make a shift; whatever it took. It doesn’t matter what caused it. Stassi says it does to her. It should be what Kristen wants, and not because of what other people think. Kristen says they made a choice not to be together. Andy reminds Kristen that she said if she ever gets married, it would be to Carter. She stands by that, and admits they still live together. Their dog was mauled by a Pitbull and she needed him. They don’t sleep in same bed every night, and they’ve only had sex twice. Andy says, it’s confusing. Stassi says they’re like Scheana and Adam. Scheana says they’re best friends, but they sleep together. Kristen says Stassi’s tough love doesn’t work for her. She doesn’t know how get him out. She cries alone, because they’re annoyed, and she’s afraid to call. Katie says Kristen is settling to be unhappy. She’s trying to make herself happy in a situation that’s no good for her. Kristen says she listened to Katie and Schwartz for eight years, and never walked away. Katie says they’re not walking away. Andy asks if the issue is that she should just get Carter’s ass out of the house. Kristen says it’s none of their business, but Katie says Kristen wants Carter to love her, and made it her business for over two years. Forgive her for having an opinion. Kristen says she does. Andy says Beau was friends with Patrick before he dated Stassi. How’s that going now? Beau says they text once in a while, but it’s been hard since Stassi’s break from him. Stassi says Patrick is scared of her. Andy tells her social media says Beau is the best thing for her; an upgrade from Jax. Stassi says she and Jax both upgraded. Andy asks Stassi if it’s hard to be not the most liked person in the relationship. She says she’s getting used to it. Stassi says she got everything she told her friends that she wanted. She wanted someone who could be friends with her friends, and do the same things she likes to do; an actual partner. Beau whispers, I love you, and Stassi returns the whisper. Everyone is like, aww! On that note, it’s time for Beau to skedaddle.

Andy says in the Mexican hotel, Schwartz’s balls were as big as anything. We flash back to Schwartz and Katie’s fight. Andy wonders where that all came from, and Schwartz said it had built up. The last rumblings of pent up resentment from early on, and was like one least burp. It was cathartic, but he felt terrible. Andy says the root of what Katie was saying is that he was working so hard, and she wanted to spend time Lisa says lot of people have jobs, and are still committed. Katie says Schwartz isn’t good at listening. Before Andy wraps up the Mexico conversation, he wants to know if Schwartz’s grand romantic gesture, of a violinist and junk food, worked. Did they make mad passionate love? Katie says she had Montezuma’s Revenge. Schwartz says he was on the verge, and Jax says they all had severe anal leakage. Andy is like, alrighty then.

He says when he thinks of rivalries, he thinks of the Hatfields and McCoys, the Red Sox and the Yankees, and Kristen and Ariana. He asks Tom if it’s weird seeing his ex and current girlfriends being friends. He says, it’s not that bad. Brittany wonders which is weirder; Tom and James being friends, or Ariana and Kristen. Ariana thinks the most weird thing is Jax and Tom being friends. Tom doesn’t think it’s weird, considering the other people who have made up. Andy asks if Kristen still thinks that Tom and Ariana did something inappropriate when she and Tom were together. She does, but it doesn’t matter anymore. Ariana says they did kiss in a pool in Vegas, so there was that.

Andy says from the moment Jax proposed, Brittany was planning her engagement party. He asks if she had the fairytale theme in mind already. She says she knew she would get married in a castle, so it followed the theme. Andy asks why the bigger Bridezilla will be; Brittany or Jax? Stassi says Brittany is Brattany. She knows what she wants. If she wants a cherry blossom tree that has to be shipped in from Japan, it’s going to happen. We find out Lala has become a bridesmaid. Brittany says she felt badly about it, because they are really close. She and the girls all have a bond. They understand each other and what they’re all going through better than anyone. Andy asks how many bridesmaids she has, and Brittany says, eleven bridesmaids and one bridesman. Andy asks why Kristen thought she should be maid-of-honor. Kristen says Brittany’s brother had said she was Brittany’s best friend in LA, so she figured it was a sure thing. Brittany says it breaks her heart that Kristen felt that way, but thought it was more appropriate for Katie to take that role. Stassi tells Ariana that she’s not picking bridesmaids. It’s too stressful.

Andy was impressed with Lisa’s beer bong. Lisa says there’s nobody else she’d do that for, and she’s never doing it again. It shot ninety miles an hour down her throat. We flash back to her burp, and Andy says, it was a great exit.

Andy points out that Tom ticked off a list of lies Jax has told over the years in the finale. Andy asks if Jax heard about it, and he says, no. Brittany reminds him that they watched the episode together. They laughed about it, because it was true. Brittany tells Andy that Jax would never say he didn’t eff up in the past. Tom says Jax had a Chanel fragrance ad in his portfolio for as long as Tom has known him, and it’s way not him. Stassi says, it doesn’t look like you, but omg, cool! Tom says something about Channing Tatum rooming with Jax, and Jax insists it’s true. It was in the beginning of his career. Tom says he was a model before Jax, and Channing was blowing up after doing a Mountain Dew ad. Jax says that’s when he left. He was nineteen, and it was a big deal. My high school boyfriend was roommates with Christopher Reeve before he was Superman, so it’s possible. Andy asks Lisa how she thinks Jax will do as a married man. She hopes well. She thinks Brittany is his best asset. She knows how control him to a certain extent. Jax says he’s still a work in progress, but he’s devoted to changing. Andy says he’s heard Jax say he was a work in progress before, but Jax says he always will be. No matter how much he changes, that old person will always be there. Lisa comparing him to Ken was an honor. Lisa says it wasn’t a positive, but Jax thinks it’s a compliment because Ken came out the other side, and he’s a great dude.

Andy says the engagement party meant something else to Scheana. Scheana says she’s never seen Adam that angry. We flash back to that, and Scheana says that’s what triggered her emotions. She never thought he’d speak to her again. Andy tells her that she kept saying she and Adam were just friends, but when he wasn’t giving her enough attention, she set up a date with a hot model. Lisa says it’s the worst choice she ever made. Well, there is Shay. Andy says then she got Adam’s attention. He asks if she was interested in Ethan or was she just setting up Adam to pay attention. Scheana says she met Ethan on Watch What Happens Live in LA. He was one of the guys who was fanning NeNe. They’ve been talking since then, which really didn’t answer the question. They discuss Botox, which Stassi says Scheana has been getting since she was twelve. Scheana says she’s going to be thirty-three, and this is how she can get a twenty-five year old.  Andy says she looks great, but she’s still young, and he thinks Botox makes you look older. I think it just makes you look freaky. Not to leave any personal stone unturned, Andy asks if she was thinking about Adam while having sex with Ethan. She admits he crossed her mind, and she felt badly about it. Andy asks how Adam reacted to the penguin, and she says he loves penguins like Stassi loves ranch dressing. It worked. She’s continued dating other people, but he hasn’t been with anyone. I wonder, how is this working? and also why Andy doesn’t ask, since he’s been so intrusive. Andy asks her about Adam not going downtown, and she says they’d go right to it without much foreplay. Lisa thinks in a relationship, if you’re not willing to go downtown, it’s a huge disrespect. Scheana says he did it the next day. There’s a TMI explosion in my head.

Andy says Brittany’s whole family was in town for the engagement party. He knows her mom and memaw love Jax, but where does he stand with the other members of the family. Brittany says she was surprised when she saw the footage, and didn’t like how Jax treated them. We see the clip where Jax says he’ll always be number one. She says she screamed bloody murder. Don’t disrespect her family. Jax agrees that he was inappropriate, but says there was a lot of pressure, and he was also entertaining his sister. He was having a couple of drinks, and trying to relax, when Brittany’s brothers kept giving him a list of what he needed to do for her. He thought, what about him? Andy asks if anyone got offended when Jax said he bought Brittany’s brother a baby. The vernacular was not great. Brittany says Jax doesn’t know how to speak; he doesn’t have a mom and dad. Andy says he has a mom. He’s not Dr. Phil, but wonders if Jax’s mom is invited to the wedding. Brittany says it’s still up in air. Andy says life is short, and Jax says he knows that. Brittany thinks his mother should try to reach out. She asks what Lisa thinks, and Lisa says she can see his pain, and as a mother, it’s incumbent on her to reach out. Brittany says they wanted to see his dad, and she told them to wait. Jax says he doesn’t have a mother, but Lisa says until recently. It’s going to hurt his mother when she sees this. He should say he wishes she’d reach out. Brittany says, Marie, please reach out. Jax says he’s the only man in the family, and doesn’t understand why she didn’t talk to him. Regardless of what his dad said, he would have called and told them he’s not going to make it; get on a plane. Andy asks how they think his father would feel about the engagement. Jax says he loved Brittany. Brittany says Jenny sent her texts about how he would love her, and she’s saving them forever.

James tells Stassi to get off his d*ck. Stassi says he won’t shut up, and stop telling her to shut up. He has no right to talk to her like that; it’s disgusting. Brittany says, it’s not okay. That’s why he’s never going to be around her again. He was talking about her family. James says Jax was talking sh*t about Raquel, and Andy says Brittany has never said a bad word to him. Why was he taking it out on her? She’s the nicest one in the room. James says he felt like it. He knows it’s not nice, okay? Lisa says, it’s not okay. He asks what she wants him to say. She says he’s going to lose any bit of support he has, and he asks if that’s a threat from her. She tells him that she’s saying, unless he changes, he’s going to lose the support he has. Andy says, James is no longer at SUR, and his relationship with the group has frayed; what’s in store? James says he’s making music, traveling America, and DJing. There’s a lot he’s working on, and he has high, high hopes.

Andy asks Schwartz how he felt about the audience reaction to Katie, and the haters. He says it took willpower not go after them, but he knows better than to feed the trolls. His wife is sexy and beautiful, and he loves her. Suck his classic d*ck.

Peter is standing by with cocktails, along with Ken, who has a tray of memaw’s beer cheese. Andy asks Lisa who she thinks will be first to have a PUMP baby. Shouldn’t that be a SUR baby? She thinks it will be Brittany, and Jax says, she’s already pregnant. Brittany says he’s just kidding. She wants to have fun at the wedding. Andy says nothing is coming between her and having fun at her wedding. They all say, cheers, and Lala toasts with cheese. They don’t seem to like the shots very much, and Brittany tells them, chase it with the beer cheese.

The end. For now

👗 Red Carpet At the Nurses Ball…

They’re all beautiful, but Lulu’s dress gives me life.


🐶 Lisa Goes To the Dogs…

Who needs the Wives when you can be with Giggy?


👑 And If You’re Not All Throned Out…

I’ll bet it was on purpose. It’s like the last day of school, senior year.


The cast says goodbye.


The facts.


An interesting take.


And my favorite. Throne with a side of snark. I’ll miss this recap.


👫 Interesting Pair…

Apparently, Gina Kirschenheiter (Real Housewives of Orange County) and Danny Trejo (Machete) are in an ad for some kind of ED device.


I couldn’t find a video of the ad, so you get this instead.





May 19, 2019 – Extra! Extra! The Final Throne, Throne Doc, New Watchmen, Throne Gossip & Not Sansa’s Cup


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


Game of Thrones

Since this is the final finale, I thought it was important enough to break my usual Sunday evening routine of just watching TV unless a Dead show was on.

The aftermath of Dany’s destruction reminded me of the streets of NYC after the World Trade Center attack. Deathly quiet, with a few people wandering around looking lost. Grey Worm sentenced some surprisingly still alive soldiers to die. Jon told him it was over, but Grey Worm said it wasn’t over until the queen’s enemies were all defeated. Jon asked how much more defeated he wanted them, but Grey Worm slit their throats anyway. Tyrion found Cersei and Jaime’s bodies in the rubble, and wept. Dany was feeling herself, and praised the Dothraki for giving her the Seven Kingdoms, and made Grey Worm her commander. She told her warriors she wanted to liberate everyone from the wheel, and told Tyrion he’d committed treason by freeing Jaime. He tossed his Hand pin away like an old shoe, and got thrown in a cell for his trouble.

Arya told Jon to watch his back since Dany knew who he really was. Tyrion told Jon that he’d seen his best friend burned alive, and Varys’s ashes could soon tell his I told you so. He said everywhere Dany went, evil men died and they cheer her for it. but she was growing more powerful instead of good. Jon said, love is the death of duty, and Tyrion asked if he just came out with that. Jon said he got it from a Maester Aemon. Tyrion said, sometimes duty is the death of love, and Jon always tried to do the right thing. No matter the cost, Jon protected people. Tyrion asked who the biggest threat was now, and who was a bigger threat to her than Jon? Jon wasn’t having it, but Tyrion said Sansa told him about Jon because she didn’t want Dany to be queen. Jon said she didn’t get to choose, and Tyrion said, but Jon did, and he had to do it now. I thought I was seeing things when a huge mound of snow moved, but it was Drogon sleeping under the snow, while Dany checked out the Iron Throne. This would be the first thing I’d change since it looks so uncomfortable. At least put a pillow on it. She talked about envisioning the throne as a girl, and Jon tried to talk some sense into her, after he saw she was hellbent on finishing what she started. She told Jon the world they needed wouldn’t be built by men from the world they had, and asked Jon to build it with her; they could break the wheel together. They kissed, and he killed her by stabbing her while they kissed. The whole thing was kind of depressing. Then Jon was like, oh yeah, the dragon, as Drogon landed behind him. I wished Drogon would just fly away, because I like even CGI animals more than actual people. There was more depressing stuff as Drogon discovered Dany was dead, and he melted the Iron Throne. I thought he might melt Jon, but instead, he took my advice, grabbing Dany’s body in his claws, and flying away. His job was done.

Jon was nabbed, and Tyrion was taken before a tribunal of the most powerful people in Westeros. Davos told Grey Worm that the unsullied could have some land in return for their hard work. Grey Worm said the unsullied didn’t want payment. They wanted justice. Tyrion said he didn’t get to choose, and Grey Worm told him, shut up. He’d already talked too much all season. Tyrion said Grey Worm was right, but he still didn’t get to make the choice. Sam said they were the heads of the great houses, but thought a decision that affected everyone should be made by everyone. This is how the vote was almost born, but the rest of them started laughing. Davos asked Tyrion what he thought, and supposed Tyrion wanted the crown. Tyrion said half the people hated him for serving Dany, and the other half hated him for betraying her. He couldn’t think of a worse choice, but said Bran was the keeper of their stories. Who better to lead them into the future? Sansa said he can’t father children, and Tyrion said, good. The sons of kings could be cruel, and it was the wheel Dany wanted to break. Future leaders would be chosen this way. He knew Bran didn’t want it, but if they chose him, would he wear the crown? Bran asked why Tyrion thought he came all this way. Everyone said, aye, except Sansa, who said the North would remain an independent kingdom, as it had been for thousands of years, which apparently somehow meant aye. Everyone hailed Bran, and Bran made Tyrion his Hand. Tyrion said he didn’t want it, but Bran said he didn’t want to be king either, so too bad. Grey Worm said the unsullied deserved justice, and Bran said they got it. Tyrion was going to have to spend the rest of his life in this headache of a job, fixing his own mistakes.

Jon got sent back to the Night’s Watch because Tyrion talked Grey Worm into it. Jon wondered if what he did was right, because it didn’t feel like it. He figured he wouldn’t see Tyrion again, but Tyrion told him not to be so sure. Everyone went back to work, and the unsullied sailed for the Isle of Naath. Arya decided to head west of Westeros, since no one knew what was there. Jon apologized to Bran for not being there when Bran need him, but Bran said he was where he was supposed to be. Brienne added Jaime’s death to the Book of Knights or whatever it is. After making him sound good, she wrote, he died protecting his queen.

Tyrion sat in the Hand chair, which looked more comfy than the Iron Throne, but still unpleasant to sit in. Sam brought him a book, A Song of Ice and Fire, which he said was all about the throne game history, and I wondered if George RR Martin knew about Sam plagiarizing him. Tyrion wondered what was said about him, and Sam said he didn’t believe Tyrion was mentioned. Bran was wheeled in, and we found out Drogon was last spotted flying east. Bronn said, the further the better, everyone said, long may he reign! to Bran, and Bran was wheeled back out. Bronn was now the Master of Coin, and said if he didn’t keep an eye on the coin, there wouldn’t be no more coin. Davos said, any more, and Bronn asked if he was the Master of Grammar, which made me laugh. Since the brothel burned down, Bronn was willing to fund that.

Tormund met Jon at the gate that replaced where the Wall fell, dashing my hopes of him and Brienne becoming a couple. I was also hoping she was going to write that Jaime had a child, but I guess it would be too early for her to know that anyway. Jon was like, back to the old drawing board. I kept wondering if that was a duck head on the pummel of his sword before realizing it’s a direwolf.

Sansa officially began her reign, Arya got on a ship with a Stark crest on the sail, and Jon was reunited with Ghost. I hope everyone who griped about Jon not taking him along is glad now, since he would have been crispy crittered. Sansa got a crown, and sat on the Not Iron Throne, while everyone said, the Queen of the North! Jon and Tormund took a bunch of people into the woods, and vocals were added the the theme over the ending credits.

🙌 Next Sunday – May 26th – at 9 pm, HBO is airing The Last Watch, a GoT documentary.

👀 HBO will also be airing a new series, The Watchmen, that looks intriguing. Their site just says, coming soon, but you can get a sneak peek here:


👑 Bronn and the Queen…

I’d forgotten they were ever dating.


☕ It’s Dany’s Fault…

The final final word on that coffee cup.



May 17, 2019 – Red Carpet At the Ball, Chef Lisa, Throne Theory, Jim Has Not, Adios Coltee, OC Alumni, Miami Forgettable, Reality Troubles, a Mix Of Six Quotes, RIP For Three & Goodbye Mr. Tudball


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Five minutes to the Nurses Ball. Maxie tells Nina that she has to be there has to be on the red carpet, not making grand entrance. Sydney Valjean (Chandra Wilson) joins Nina, who thought she’d be late. Sydney says, never, especially when she’s hosting. Nina reminds her that she’s co-hosting, and Sydney says she knows it’s Nina’s night. Maxie is live tweeting, and Nina tells Sydney to go easy on the guests’ outfits, but she says she stands for truth in fashion. She’ll be cordial, but she’s not going to lie. Nina says if someone is wearing something… challenging, she’ll take it. Starting with the first guest. She’s extra.

In Toronto, Curtis and Laura are tied back to back. Curtis comes to, and tells Laura, wake up. They have trouble. She opens her eyes, and says, oh my God.

Carly comes downstairs in a sparkly red gown. Sonny tells her that she looks great, and asks what the verdict is. Are they staying or going?

Nina welcomes the viewers to the 2019 GH Nurses Ball. She’s being joined by Crimson magazine’s New York fashion editor, Sydney Valjean. It’s the first Ball Sydney has been to in person, and she’s ready to get the night started. Nina says for once, they’re on the same page. She usually saves this guest for last, but suggests they get to the good stuff first, and introduces Lucy, who’s wearing a mosaic patterned dress with a fishtail hem. Sydney says she looks stunning. Lucy gushes over Sydney, saying she’s such a fangirl. Nina says she’s right there too. Can Lucy give the audience a taste of what to expect? and Lucy says, no. She doesn’t want to ruin the delicious surprises. She goes over to Maxie, who compliments her dress, which Lucy calls delirious. She says, let the Nurses Ball begin.

Doc and Ava come in, and Sydney says Doc is looking dapper. Ava says, isn’t he though? Ava is wearing a black gown with sleeves of silver fringe dripping down to a cuff at the wrist. Nina tells her, kudos for being bold. She asks what they’re looking forward to, and Doc appreciates the raising of money for a truly worthy cause. Ava says they want to help any way they can. They move on to Maxie. Ava asks if there’s something wrong, and Maxie says she’s just surprised to see them together. Ava says, it will take some getting used to.

Nina introduces Scotty as lawyer extraordinaire. Does he want to say hello to the audience? He says, hello… and goodbye. Maxie asks who he’s wearing, and he says, expensive. She wonders who has his trousers in a twist, and he looks at Doc and Ava, saying, those two are all wrong, Maxie says, agreed, and he says he wants to make it right. He blocks the camera with his hand.

Laura tells Curtis, he’s gone. That poor woman. He killed her after she helped him. Curtis says, he killed her because he knew she was going to help them. He doesn’t think Ryan is coming back any time soon. It’s up to them to get themselves out. She says, please tell her that he has a knife in his pocket. He thinks the corners of the chair is sharp enough. If they work together, they can free themselves. She says, wait a minute. She smells gas.

Carly tells Sonny that Josslyn is definitely not going, but wants them to go. Sonny doesn’t want to, but Carly doesn’t know. She asks what he thinks, and he says it would be good for Carly if she went. She knew he’d say that, and he wonders why she asked. She tells him, next time tell her what she wants to hear, Sonny says he secretly hates this night. It reminds him of Stone, and how he’s gone, and the others who have died; but he hears Stone in his head, telling him, get off your ass, and go, so he goes. He sees people propping each other up, having a good time, and loving each other. He sees what good it does, and he’s glad he put his tux on and went. Carly says they’ll wait for Kristina to get there.

Franco picks up Elizabeth at the hospital. She looks like a princess, in blue sleeveless gown with a train. He says, wow, and she tells him that he looks handsome. He says she’s so beautiful, and kisses her. Epiphany tells them to get a room – or at least a supply closet. Elizabeth and Franco agree Epiphany looks great, and she does in an orange gown with a tie at the waist and a front slit. TJ, Deanna, and Amy join them. TJ says they’re ready to get their Ball on, and Deanna says she’ll call an Uber. They don’t want to miss the red carpet. Franco says he hired an enormous stretch limo. They can’t have the Ball without the nurses, and they’re going to arrive in style. Amy says Franco is ridiculously nice. Franco suggests they get going.

Nina introduces Willow escorted by Chase. She says, rumor has it that he’s performing again, and he says she’ll have to wait and see. She says Willow must know, but she says, he’s like a vault. She tried to get it out of him. Sydney asks, how? and Chase tells Willow, just be patient. Sydney says, they’re adorable. Nina is like, meh, but then says, he’s adorable, and runs to Valentin. They kiss.

Sasha comes in with Michael. Nina is happy to see them there together. Michael is happy to be there. It’s a cause dear to his heart. Nina says, which he showed with his company’s generous donation. She thanks him. Sydney knows it’s Willow’s first Ball, and asks how she feels. Willow says she was nervous at first, but she’s ready to have fun now.

Ava thanks Doc. He says, for what? and she says she was close to ripping Nina’s face off, and he smoothed the waters. He says she has prioritize. They have a bigger mission tonight. Ava thinks Ryan won’t be able to resist, and he agrees. She’s the best way to draw Ryan out, but nothing with Ryan ever goes according to plan.

Curtis says he can smell the gas, and feels it. He coughs, and Laura says she knows what Ryan is doing. Curtis suggests she fill him in. She says Ryan was supposed to die in a funhouse explosion. He wants her to die the same way he was supposed to. Curtis says, a funhouse? He’s not having much fun. There’s no way he’s going to let this freak win.

Lucy asks Scotty what Doc is thinking. Scotty says, Doc thinks he can douse his grief with guilt, and Ava is milking it for all it’s worth. It’s like a like runaway train, and they have to put brakes on.

Michael hears Maxie is on online tweeting duty, and she tells them to smile.

Nina says, here come newlyish weds, Franco and Elizabeth. Sydney admires Elizabeth’s dress, and Nina asks if they’re looking forward to the performances. Franco says he really stays for the nurses. He feels fortified being with them. He tells Nina, a gaggle of rowdy nurses is coming, and the gaggle follows them in. Epiphany asks who’s he calling rowdy? She runs a tight ship. TJ says, a tighter ship has never been run. Nina introduces Epiphany has GH’s head nurse, and Sydney asks if Magic Milo will be joining them. Epiphany says he had a work conflict, so Milo is keeping the magic in his pants this year.

Sydney introduces renowned coffee importer, Sonny Corinthos, and his lovely wife. Sydney says the cause has a special significance to Sonny’s family. Sonny says, it’s always a good time. It’s a blessing be there, and realize how precious life is. He and Carly kiss.

Michael tells Sasha that he’s sorry if Nina gushing over him made her feel uncomfortable. She says, it didn’t. She thought it was sweet.

Chase tells Willow that he has a great idea. The next time he visits her class, he’ll bring Thor, but also deputize the kids. She thinks it is a great idea, but he’ll have to do it in someone else’s class. She was fired. She’s finishing the yea, and then she’s done. He asks when it happened, and she says, yesterday. He’s so sorry, and asks if it’s because of the Charlotte thing. She says she doesn’t agree with Nina and Valentin’s choices a lot, but the truth is, she could have handled it better. Chase suggests focusing on the upside. There are a lot of private schools that would jump at the chance to hire her. Sometimes things that seem to be the worst, actually turn out to be the best. She says it worked out for the best the night she met him.

Franco tells Elizabeth that no one can hold a candle to her. She says it’s going to be a good night, and he says, it’s already pretty good.

Maxie hugs Peter, and brings him over to Nina. She introduces Maxie as her superior fashion editor, who’s doing double work. With her, is the publisher of The Invader, along with his star reporter, Lulu. Maxie hopes it’s less eventful than last year. I die over Lulu’s dress, which is sparkly and from fairyland. Nina gets something caught in her throat, and excuses herself. Sydney says she thought Nina would never leave, and asks about Lulu’s dress.

Unfortunately, I don’t get to hear the answer. Nina goes on the terrace, and sees Jax. She says she’s looking for water, and he asks if she’ll settle for champagne. She says, sure, and sips it. She apologizes, saying she doesn’t usually steal people’s booze, but her throat closed up. He asks if it was an interview with press, and she says she’s a publisher doing this for charity. He says it’s generous of her. She doesn’t know if her throat closed because of the lights (?) or because she hates those two. Did she just say that out loud? Jax says she’s lucky he doesn’t know who she’s referring too. She says champagne goes to her head, and thanks him, saying she’ll see him on the red carpet.

Carly sees Michael, and he introduces Sasha to her and Sonny. Carly says they’ve already met. At the MetroCourt after Sasha’s workout. It’s nice to see her again. Michael says, no Josslyn? and Carly says, no, but she insisted they come. She had second, third, and fourth thoughts about it. Michael tells her to give Josslyn space and confidence. She’ll be okay. Carly excuses herself to go to the ladies room. Sonny says, Michael knows she’s going to text her daughter, right. Michael says, 100%.

Lucy says Scotty knows what to do. He says she just told him. Just go. Lucy says, it’s going to work, and gives Scotty a thumbs up.

Ava tells Doc, don’t worry. Ryan won’t come there with all these people. He’ll wait until she’s alone.

Mac and Felicia arrive. Sydney says it’s not their first Nurses Ball. What’s their favorite act from over the years. Mac says Mr. Something-or-Other (a bad act he did once), of course (🍷).

Sydney welcomes Jax back, and he says he’s happy to be back. She asks if he’s performing, and he says, Sonny sang last year, so maybe he’ll do a dance number. Anything is possible. A reporter grabs him, and asks if it’s a quick visit, or will Port Charles be seeing more of him? He says they’ll see what happens. He likes to keep his options open. Nina stutters trying to ask Jax a question, and Sydney says he’s an international financier; what brings him back to Port Charles? He says he lives in Australia, and Nina says she loves Australia. He asks if she’s been there, and she says, no, but the accent is great. Jax says he just finished a project there, and he’s looking into some opportunities. He’s missed Port Charles, and it’s great to be back, especially for an important cause. Nina says he should say hello to Maxie, and trails off. Sydney tells him, have a good evening, and pokes Nina. Maxie says she didn’t know he was back, and asks how long he’s home for. He says, indefinitely.

Sam and Shiloh walk the carpet. Nina doesn’t know him, and Sam explains that he runs DOD. Nina says, fantastic, and asks where Jason is. It’s not surprising he’s not there, since he probably doesn’t go to events like this. Shiloh says, it’s irrelevant. Sam isn’t defined by anyone else’s decision. Nina says, awesome, and passes them to Maxie. Sam says they heard she was live tweeting. Maxie says she was, but she just shut down. She has to find a friend. I laugh at Sam’s face when their picture is taken. It’s amusing in general how some of the photos have their true feelings written all over their faces.

A man goes up to Doc, telling him a woman passed out on the red carpet. They took her upstairs, but now she’s hysterical. He asks Doc to take a look. Doc asks Ava to excuse him. She says, if it starts, she’ll save him a seat. Scotty smiles.

Valentin approaches Peter and Lulu. He says Lulu looks exceptionally nice. She says Charlotte helped her pick out her dress. Valentin says, she helped Nina with her ensemble as well. Lulu says, maybe she’ll follow in her stepmother’s footsteps. Jax walks in.

Carly tells Jax that she so did not want to come. Jax says he kept offering to bail, and Carly says Josslyn ordered him. Josslyn doesn’t want to be the reason they stayed home. Jax says, it shows they’re listening, and have faith in her.

Lulu sees Sonny at the bar. He thought her mom was coming, but she says Laura is working on a special assignment. He says, mayor business? and she says, something like that.

Curtis tells Laura, they’ve got to get out. She thinks she can reach his knot. She gets his arm untied, and he says she is good.

Scotty tells Ava to with him to see something, and drags her off.

Doc knocks on a room door. He says received word someone needed assistance. Lucy pulls him into the room. She’s wearing nothing but a slip, and he assumes she didn’t faint on the carpet. She says, no, but it’s truly an emergency. Ava doesn’t know him like she does. She doesn’t see he’s feeling guilty about something he didn’t do. He says, that’s not what’s happening. She says he has a big, generous heart, but he doesn’t have to take care of Ava. Please let her save him from himself.

Jax talks to Josslyn on the phone. He says if she changes her mind, he has his phone on. Lulu, Peter, and Valentin come down the hall. Lulu introduces her boss and Valentin to Jax, but I get the vibe that Jax and Valentin know each other.

Willow and Chase sip champagne. She says, it’s no vintage of love, but it will get her through the evening. She suddenly stops, and Chase asks if she’s okay. She sees Shiloh and Sam.

Nina introduces Finn and Anna, former super spy. Sydney says they’re a lovely looking couple. At least Anna doesn’t look like an old lady this year, and has a nicely draped, black sleeveless dress; kind of Grecian. Sydney asks who she’s wearing, and Anna is like, umm… Nina says don’t keep them in suspense, and Anna stares at Robert, who just walked in. Nina introduces him as another super spy, and says he’s looking dashing. As they all are. Sydney says, an intriguing trio, and Nina says, for sure. She tells the viewers, the Ball is starting.

Chase tells Willow that she’s safe. Sam asks Shiloh if he’s sure he wants to do this. He says he just wants to say hello to Sonny and Carly. He asks how Kristina is, and Sonny says, better now. Shiloh says they’re looking forward to her return, but Carly says she wouldn’t count on it. He assures them he has the best intentions, as well as being Kristina’s friend. Sonny says he’s a philosopher, right? He says he used to be called that. Carly bets he’s been called other things too. Sonny says the philosophy he goes by is, family first, and always, at any cost.

Curtis gets loose, and unties Laura. He says they have to get out of there. It’s gonna blow. They run outside, and get blown off the porch.

Scotty brings Ava to the hotel room where Doc is. She says she has no time for this nonsense. He tells her, trust him. It’s for her own good. He opens the door, and goes, ah-ha! Caught you! but looks surprised himself.

Nina tells Sydney that she was flawless. Sydney says Nina too. They make a great team. Nina says, in print and on the red carpet. Sydney thinks Nina has someone waiting for her. Valentin is there, and says, let’s get out of here. Nina and Sydney air kiss. Nina says they’ll talk soon, and Sydney says, not too soon. Nina goes inside with Valentin.

Finn tells Robert that he wants his ring back.

Felicia tells Anna that she and Robert made quite an entrance. Which one is her date?

The Nurses Ball is about to begin. Everyone takes their seats. Jax watches Nina and Valentin.

On Monday, Lucy welcomes everyone, Anna tells Robert that Finn is her date, Maxie says Shiloh is the perfect name for a cult leader, and Jason tells Spinelli that they’re setting Shiloh up tonight.

🍳 Tonight, I happened to catch MasterChef: Celebrity Family Showdown. I hadn’t even heard about this particular Gordon Ramsay effort, but as if getting that blessing on a Friday night wasn’t enough, Lisa Vanderpump was a contestant, teamed with her daughter Pandora, against Snooki and JWoww from The Jersey Shore. The other two teams were Johnny Weir and his brother, vs Tara Lipinski and her husband. It was cooking something with a while fish, and Tara won, but who cares about them? The next teams’ challenge was to recreate a dish from tasting it, blindfolded. Lisa and Pandy were given a swordfish dish, while the Shore babes were given veal piccata. Puffy was along for the ride with Lisa, and although he was presented with his own tiny apron (so he wouldn’t feel left out – aww!) by Gordon, he was palmed off to Ken when the cooking started. The prize was $25K to the winner’s choice of charity, but the loser would still get $15K. Both teams were off somewhat, with Lisa and Pandy substituting snapper for swordfish, and Snooki and JWoww making marsala instead of piccata. Since they got the veal part right, the latter team won. I couldn’t even tell you the charity, since I was concentrating on Lisa, whose money would have gone to the dogs. My favorite part was when Lisa kicked the fridge door shut with her foot. Queens who can do no wrong! They’re just like us! The next part airs on Wednesday, May 22nd at 8 pm (FOX), and will be rerun on Friday at 9 pm. Tori Spelling, Jennie Garth and their daughters will be competing against Evander Holyfield, Oscar De La Hoya and their daughters.

🐉 Another Theory…

The horse belonged to Zoolander.


💸 Another Bad Day For Jim…

He has, but she wants him to have not.


💃 She’s Movin’ Moved On…

Larissa wasted no time after Coltee was out of the picture.


❓ Remember Her?

No longer naked wasted, but still behind in payments.


❓❓ Remember Them?

Me neither.


🃏 Harsh Realities…

The only sure things in life are death, taxes, and Jax being an idiot.


A soon-to-be married idiot.


The suckerfish that is Hoppy just won’t go away.


📚 Quotes of the Week

I tried every diet in the book, I tried some that weren’t in the book. I tried eating the book — it tasted better than most of the diets!Dolly Parton

Problems are not the problem; coping is the problem. – Virginia Satir

What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?Vincent Van Gogh

Is your d*ck circumstanced? – Felix Kendrickson (Jasper Pääkkönen), BlacKkKlansman

Remember, the storm is a good opportunity for the pine and the cypress to show their strength and their stability. – Ho Chi Minh

I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me, they are the role model for being alive.Gilda Radner – I couldn’t agree more.

✨ In Loving Memory…

Of Marisol’s Mom. Anyone have some good champagne they’d like to share? Makes you wonder about the botched plastic surgery though.


Of the blonde in the squad, and an icon of the 60s.


Of internet sensation, Grumpy Cat. We’ll miss you most of all.


🎭 And Last But Not Least…

I loved him on the Carol Burnett Show, especially when he and Harvey Korman would crack up.





May 14, 2019 – Finn’s Ring Goes Missing, Justin Doubles His Firepower, Dracarys All Over, Throne Thoughts, the Real Throne, Throne Feels, Beverly Beg Off & OLTL Frat


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Michael comes by Willow’s classroom. He says he didn’t know teachers kept such late hours. She says they don’t, but she’s hosting some parents and the principal. He asks if it’s a problem, and she says nothing or no one she can’t handle.

In Toronto, Maxie, Peter, Curtis, and Laura play Trivial Pursuit. Maxie tells Peter, not geography, and I identify. He says, entertainment. A TV show is described, and Curtis says, Fraternity Row. That was his story. And also a nod to the fake soap opera that was part of a One Life to Live storyline many years ago.

On the phone with Lulu, Doc says they’re ready and waiting. He tells Ava that Lulu’s colleague from Page Five is on the way. Ava says they can provide more tawdry fodder to get Ryan’s attention. She takes Doc’s arm, and he tenses. She tells him, it’s okay, but he says, nothing about it is okay. She says sorry to violate his personal space. He says he just wants Ryan captured, so he can get back to his life and his wife, and Ava must have a life she wants to get back to.

Peter tells Maxie, sorry their first date went down the drain. She says he doesn’t control the weather, and until the snow lets up, their fabulous first date will have to wait. Standing by the window, Curtis tells Laura that Clue or Risk would guarantee world domination. She wonders when the weather will turn. It’s sweet of Maxie and Peter to let them intrude, but… Curtis says they’ve worn out their welcome. Laura says they need to get back on the road, and track down Ryan.

At the MetroCourt, Valentin suggests whisking Nina away, but she says it would be irresponsible to miss a meeting. The less time she spends with that woman, the better. Sasha appears, and asks, what woman? Nina says it’s not important, and asks what Sasha is up to. Sasha says she’s meeting Michael. Nina says Sasha has a hot date, but not if they’re around. She grabs Valentin and they jet.

On the phone, Finn tells Robert that he wants his ring. Robert bets he does. Finn says he can’t propose without it, and Robert says he’ll hand it off to Finn later, Finn tells him, tonight’s the night. Anna approaches Finn, and says, sounds ominous. Robert tells Finn that he’ll drop by with his precious bauble later. Robert opens the ring box, and ring is gone.

Michael comes into the classroom with a gift bag, saying he thought he’d leave it on Willow’s desk, so she could get in the morning. She asks what it’s for, and he says to thank her for helping his sister. He saw Kristina this morning. Willow asks how she is, and he says, she’s not her old self yet, but she’ll get there eventually – thanks to her. Willow thinks Neil had a lot to do with it. Michael says, for sure, but Willow spoke about her own experience with Shiloh, and it was instrumental in getting his sister back. He says thank you doesn’t do justice to what Willow did. They hug as Nina and Valentin walk in. Michael says goodnight, and breezes out.

Robert says, damn, and Finn asks, what does that mean? Robert says, the MetroCourt is out of Fosters. He ends the call as Felicia and Mac join him. Mac asks what’s wrong, and Robert says someone stole the ring out of his pocket. Felicia wonders why he has a ring, and he says it’s not his; it’s Finn’s. Felicia is shocked that he lost it, and he tells them to help him find it.

Anna asks Finn what the call was about, and he says he was just clearing a few things with Robert. Anna asks when he was going to tell her how serious Jordan’s condition is.

Maxie says, go fish. Curtis tells Laura that he’s anxious to get this over with so he can get back to his wife. She suggests when the storm clears, he go directly back to Port Charles. He asks what she’s going to do, and she says she wants to check out the last place. The piled up mail doesn’t sit right with her. He asks if she’s shaking him, but she says she just wants to get him back where he belongs, by his wife’s side. He’s sure his wife would rather have him out of her hair than crying in it. He promised to see this through with her. They’re in this together.

Doc wonders how long they have to wait, and Ava asks what’s his hurry. He’s not running home to Laura. He says, and he won’t be. Not as long as this dog and pony show is going on. She asks if her presence is that intolerable, but he says there’s nothing about her presence that’s objectionable. She asks if her reputation doesn’t give him pause, but he says he prefers forming his opinion by direct observation. She says, observe then. What does he see? He says, a human being in pain. She says Ryan saw enough to fall in love. He turned out to be a monster though, and monster love doesn’t count, except to other monsters. He says she’s not a monster, and she asks if that’s his direct observation. He says he loves his wife, and she says, of course (🍷) he does. She tells him not to worry about any more unrehearsed kisses. Doc says, maybe a rehearsed one. Someone’s coming. He grabs Ava and kisses her. Julian runs to them, and tells Doc to get his damn hands off his sister.

Julian tells Doc, back off, but Ava says, stop it. He’s not Ryan. Julian knows who he is. He’s no better than his brother. He unleashed that psycho, and got Kiki killed, and put Ava in Ryan’s sights. Doc says he’s ashamed of what he did, but Julian says, if that was true, he’d have slunk out of town long ago. Doc says he’s not going anywhere until Ryan is dead and buried. He wants to be sure. Julian asks if that’s what he told Ava. He’s taking advantage of her vulnerability. Laura moved on, but Ava is here, ripe for the picking.

Peter tells Curtis that they could play Operation or go old school. Curtis says, definitely old school. Curtis is sorry to impose, but Peter says he can’t control the weather. Peter says a private detective and the mayor. What’s the story? It’s quite the buddy comedy. Curtis thinks it’s not as entertaining as what he and Maxie have going on. Peter flashes back to Maxie saying, it’s been perfect, and kissing her. Laura tells Maxie that she’s been a lovely hostess. They’ve been sweet, but it’s clear they’d rather be alone. Maxie says, it’s really new. Kind of a first date. Laura says Maxie deserves to move on, and if she likes Peter, Laura is happy for her. Maxie thanks her, but she’s not sure she knows what she’s doing. Larua says she’ll figure it out. When the snow stops, they can get on to other activities. Maxie says she’s beginning to think that she and Peter could be the last two people on the planet and still find a way to avoid those activities.

Finn tells Anna that he can’t discuss patients. Anna gets that, but says he could have given her a heads up that Jordan could use a friend. Left to her own devices, Jordan would never say anything. She’s a proud woman. Finn says if Jordan takes a turn for the worse, he’ll let her know. Chase walks in, and says he’s there to see the commissioner. Anna says, Jordan is resting, and Chase says, another time. He asks if Anna got a manicure. She says she’s just wearing clear polish, and he says, sorry. He thought he saw a sparkle. Finn says it could be a symptom of cataracts, and can check that for him. He wants to do that right now, and tells Anna that she’s going to be late to meet Felicia. Anna says she’s not late, but Finn says she doesn’t want to be; Felicia has a mean streak. He pushes her toward the elevator. Once she’s gone, he tells Chase, that was smooth. Chase says, Anna’s ring finger is bare. What’s Finn waiting for?

Felicia says Robert has to tell Finn, and Robert asks if she’s mad. She says, Finn will understand it’s an accident, right? Mac says, of course (🍷). It’s not like he lost it on purpose. Felicia says, why would he sabotage another man’s proposal to his ex-wife?

Nina wants to call Sasha about seeing Michael with Willow, but Valentin says that Sasha told them it’s not that serious. Nina can’t find her phone, and says her whole life is on it. He thinks it could be at the MetroCourt. She wants him to go find it, and he asks her to promise there won’t be bloodshed. Keep it misdemeanor. He leaves, and Principal Schultz comes in, asking them all to take a seat. He thanks them for coming out for what he hopes is a civil discussion. He’s hoping to yield understanding, so they can circumvent the district dealing with the matter. Franco doesn’t know how it can be sorted out in one discussion. Someone here has a problem with the gays.

Finn is beginning to think Chase is more invested in the proposal than he is. Chase says it doesn’t sound good, and Finn says, great detective skills. He’s surprised Chase hasn’t made head detective yet. Finn apologizes, saying he’s on edge. Chase was afraid he’d gone over it. Finn just wants to get the proposal over with, but Chase says, it’s supposed to be a romantic moment. Anna is liable to run other way with him in this state. Finn says he can’t get down on one knee without the ring. Robert has it, and he’s not giving it back. Chase says Finn should have said so sooner. Let’s go get the ring back.

Felicia can’t believe they’re having this conversation. Robert needs to return the ring. Robert says he doesn’t have a ring to return. Mac says he can get a ring. He knows a guy who creates lookalikes. Felicia tells him, no, but he and Robert are already moving, and almost run into Anna. Anna asks Felicia what she missed, and Felicia says, Robert strikes again.

Principal Schultz says what’s in question is a children’s book that celebrates the diversity of Family. Willow would like to explain, but is interrupted by one of the mothers who says she shouldn’t have her own agenda. The classroom shouldn’t be a soapbox. Franco asks which kid is hers, and finds out she’s Bianca’s mother. Franco asks if she has any idea how hurt Aiden was when he wasn’t invited to the birthday party. Nina says, this is unacceptable.

At the MetroCourt, Sasha sees Michael, who says it’s nice to see her back on her feet. Sasha says she didn’t need to go to the hospital, but he says she was delirious when he saw her. She asks if she said anything embarrassing. Michael tells her that she said she wishes Nina was her real mother. Valentin overhears.

Doc tells Julian that he misunderstood. Julian says his sister is vulnerable. When she sees him, she doesn’t just see the man who killed her daughter, but the man who put her on a pedestal, and he’s manipulating that. He thinks if Ava forgives him, the whole town will. Doc says it’s none of his business, and Julian says Ava is coming with him. He grabs her, and Doc tells him not to manhandle her. Julian says, it’s better than assaulting her. Doc had his hands all over her, and was kissing her. Ava says she was kissing back. They’re together.

Peter tells Curtis it’s his and Maxie’s first date. They were flying to Paris, but the storm had other plans. He guesses they’ll have to settle for memorable. Curtis tells him that he’s doing a good job, and to squeeze every moment for all that it’s worth. God forbid something unexpected happens; something he’s not in control of. Don’t take things in life for granted like they’ll always be there. Make the most of each and every moment.

Maxie tells Laura that she and Peter have found every reason not move forward. Laura says they’re here now, and Maxie says they ironed some things out, but she thinks Peter doesn’t think he’s good enough for her. Isn’t that crazy? Laura says she’s heard about Peter’s childhood from Lulu. Keep in mind that he’s a complicated man with complicated feelings. Maybe Maxie has to simplify it, and make the first move.

Julian asks what Ava is talking about. She says it’s been all over the news, and The Invader. Julian says, The Invader is tabloid trash, but Ava says, in this case, it’s true. Ava says she and Doc have been seeing one another, and Julian says Doc is sicker than he thought. Doc suggests Julian leave, and Julian suggests Doc stay away from his sister. Doc says if he was a better brother, maybe she wouldn’t be as vulnerable. He’s been too busy building a bar and reconstructing his image. He’s a last resort for Ava now, just like with his children. Julian punches Doc in the face. A photographer pops out of nowhere, and starts taking pictures.

Curtis says the snow stopped, and Laura says they’re back in business. Curtis says, and out of Maxie and Peter’s. Laura says she’ll see them back in Port Charles. Peter is glad they could help. Laura and Curtis leave, and Maxie says, so…? Peter says, so.

Finn tells Chase that he’s not going after Robert, and Chase asks how else is he going to get the ring back? Finn says Robert is supposed to give it to him tonight. He appreciates it, but doesn’t need rescuing from his little brother. Chase says, history says otherwise, but Finn thinks he has it under control. He’ll let Chase know when the deed is done. Chase says he and Willow can take them out to celebrate. Finn says Chase is still with the school marm. Chase wishes Finn wouldn’t call her that, and Finn says that’s why he does it. He’s teasing. Chase says Willow takes her job seriously.

Nina says they wanted a discussion; let’s discuss. She’s going to say what Willow should have said at the get-go. Schools exist to help children learn to form their own ideas, which is what parents also do. It’s not to force feed them what someone else believes. She says, they want to read something that reflects their own experiences, or look through the window of the experiences of others. They’re not indoctrinating children, just helping them be who they are. Children will do it anyway, like it or not, so why not help the kids who need more guidance or extra guidance, and let them access that? It’s no big deal. If they want to talk about what’s hurting their kids, they should discuss the chicken fingers in the cafeteria.

Sasha tells Michael that she wouldn’t want that to get back to Nina. They’ve come so far so fast. It would hurt Nina. If Sasha is asked about her mom, she immediately thinks of her adoptive mother. She doesn’t think she can shake that feeling, but couldn’t share that with Nina. She asks if it bothers him, but he says it sounds like she’s protecting Nina. She says, by lying? He says, there are some lies and truths that serve no purpose. He doesn’t believe in the truth for truth’s sake. The world is not so black and white. Her secret is safe with him. Valentin continues to listen.

Laura and Curtis go back to the last house. Curtis says, the mail is gone, and Laura says, someone is home. She knocks, and a woman answers. She apologizes for coming by so late, but they were delayed be the storm. They introduce themselves as being from Canadian Revenue, and Curtis says they’re following up on a discrepancy in their records. Laura asks if the woman is April, and if they can come in. She says she’s April, but no. We see the newspaper inside with a headline about Ryan. Laura asks if April has been away, and April asks if that’s the discrepancy. Laura says, no, but they tried knocking earlier. No one answered, and she noticed the piled up mail, and assumed no one was home. April says she just got back from a trip. Curtis hopes it was somewhere warm, and April says, Miami. He says she doesn’t look like she got much sun. Laura asks how many people live there, and April says, just her. She tells them she’s tired. Laura tries to ask how long she’s lived there, but April closes the door.

Julian tells the reporter to get that guy out of his face, referring to the photographer. He says yes, he hit Doc, but Doc provoked him. He was harassing Julian all day. Ava tells Doc that he pushed all of Julian’s buttons. She didn’t know he had it in him. Doc says the better the show, the sooner they draw out Ryan, and the sooner it’s over. Julian says tell them it’s a misunderstanding and there was no crime. Ava looks at Doc.

Finn tells Chase that anyone juggling third graders and their parents has his admiration. Chase says Willow finds shaping kids hugely rewarding, and Finn says, good thing she has him to lean on. Chase says he’s not going anywhere, but things are complicated. Finn asks if she gave Chase homework, and I laugh. Chase says Willow’s ex is still an issue. She can’t shake him; not for lack of trying. Finn asks why Chase didn’t tell him sooner. He says, let’s get that jerk, and free your girl. He heads for the elevator.

Willow thanks Nina for defending her. Nina says she wasn’t. she was speaking out against censorship. Willow has poor judgement in the classroom, and is fundamentally dishonest. She saw Willow sucking up to Michael when she has a boyfriend. Willow says, that’s not what happened, but Nina tells Willow to watch herself – because she is.

Peter says, the trip has been full of surprises, and Maxie says, a flight to France. He says, rerouted to Canada. She says, surprise guests, and he says, there could be more surprises. He says he’s beat, and she says she is too. Maxie asks if he wants to go to sleep. He says, does she? and she says, there’s not much else to do this late. He says, not really, and they say goodnight. When Maxie is gone, Peter sighs.

Anna tells Felicia that Robert and Holly are taking a break. Does Felicia think she could fix him up? Felicia says, maybe he already has eye on someone. Anna says, he needs a woman to occupy himself. Felicia says he’s been hanging around Port Charles for a while, and wonders if it’s because of someone there.

Michael suggests he and Sasha go to the café. He knows the private entrance. She says she’ll meet him there. He leaves, and she runs into Valentin on her way out. He says she and Michael seem be hitting it off. She says they enjoy each other’s company, but he tells her to keep in mind her time there is limited. He and Nina will be married soon, and she can move away. Hopefully, as far as possible.

Peter flops on the bed, and thinks about kissing Maxie. Maxie flops on the bed, and thinks about kissing Peter. He sits up, and says, make the most of each and every moment. She sits up, and says, simplify. Make the first move. They meet in the suite living room, and start kissing. For all the time they wasted, they waste none now, and they both flop onto the bed.

Nina meets Valentin at the MetroCourt. He says she just missed Michael and Sasha. He says it’s officially been a fulfilling evening, and asks how hers went. She says, swimmingly. He asks if they got the book back in the library, and she says, that too.

Willow thanks Principal Schultz. She’s grateful for his support. She wants to run some ideas past him for next year’s curriculum. He says he’d intended to delay this conversation until the end of the school year, but it can’t be avoided. He’s sorry, but she won’t be invited back to teach next year.

Anna tells Felicia, it’s true. Robert has been hanging around so much lately. Felicia says maybe he’s looking to resettle there. Anna pities the poor woman. She gets a phone call, and steps away to take it.

Chase tells Finn that he doesn’t need rescuing, the same way Finn doesn’t. Finn says, you’re learning, grasshopper, and Chase goes, huh? Finn says, you are so young… never mind. If Chase needs help, let him know, and says hi to the school marm for him. Chase says, say hi to his future sister-in-law. Providing he gets the ring back. He tells Finn that he’ll keep his phone on, and to let him know what happens.

Robert and Mac show Felicia the ring. Mac says, well? Felicia says, it’s beautiful, but he’ll never pull it off. Robert asks why she’s being a pessimist. Mac says Robert described it to the jeweler, and he doesn’t think Finn will know the difference. Felicia supposes he has a point. Robert says, but will Anna find Finn’s proposal worth accepting? Felicia says Anna might keep her emotions to herself, but she knows Anna’s heart. She’s a woman in love. Ring or no ring, she’s ripe for a proposal.

Doc says Julian is Ava’s brother, but Ava says she’ll stand by Doc’s side if he wants to press charges. If that doesn’t get Ryan’s attention… Doc says, not much else would. She tells Julian that she’s so sorry, but there’s nothing she can do. He did assault her lover. Doc says he’d like to press charges. Julian asks what he’s talking about, as handcuffs are put on him.

Laura asks what Curtis thinks. He says, she lied. Laura says, why? and he says, covering something up maybe? Inside, April tells someone that she sent them away. The paper they wanted is on the table. We see the paper with a picture of Ava and Doc, and a knife comes down on it.

Tomorrow, Curtis is ready to talk, Anna tells Robert that she’s sworn off marriage, Mike proposes to Yvonne with the ring, Shiloh wants to complete Sam’s initiation, and someone goes after Laura.

The Haves and The Have Nots

Justin tells David, he’s been waiting for this moment. David says, get the gun out of his face. Justin says, get the hell out of his apartment. David sent those guys to his place. David says if Justin puts a gun on him, he’d better use it, and Justin says he plans to. David asks where his son is, and Justin says, get out. David says his son is all he has left, and he loves him. Justin says that makes two of them. David says he’d kill for Jeffrey, and Justin says, again, that makes two of them. Get out. David calls for Jeffrey, who’s in the bathroom. Justin repeats he’s not there. David says he has a lot of pictures of Jeffrey, and he’s having dinner for two by himself. Justin says he does that from time to time. David calls for Jeffrey again, and Justin says, get out. He means it.

Jeffrey comes out, and asks what the hell Justin is doing. Justin says, sorry, but David’s got to go. When Justin turns to talk to Jeffrey, David pops him, and takes the gun. He says he’ll kill Justin, and piss on his grave. Jeffrey tells him, stop it, and David lets Justin go. He tells Jeffrey to come with him, but Jeffrey says he’s not going. David asks if Jeffrey can’t see this boy is crazy, and Jeffrey says he’s trying to help Justin. David says they’re leaving, but Jeffrey says he’s an adult. David isn’t leaving him there, and Jeffrey asks how David knew where he was. David says Jeffrey needs to come home with him – now. Jeffery says he’ll make a deal. He’ll stop seeing Justin when David stops seeing Veronica. David says, that’s entirely different. Jeffrey tells him that he should go, and David says, fine. He tells Justin if any harm comes to his son, he’ll kill him. If so much as a fingernail is broken, he’s dead. He gives Jeffrey the gun, saying Jeffrey will need it more than he will. David leaves, and Jeffrey sits on the couch next to Justin, who looks wiped out.

Jeffrey asks if Justin is okay. Justin asks why David hates him so much, and Jeffrey says, yeah, he’s okay. Justin says he didn’t do anything to David. Why won’t he leave them alone? Jeffrey says he’s their only child. Justin says all he’s trying to do is love Jeffrey. Why is it so complicated? Jeffrey says he’ll get through this, and Justin says, with Jeffrey. Jeffrey says he needs Justin to talk to someone, and Justin says, don’t start that again. Jeffery says he’s going to go. His dad is going to be pissed off. Justin says, no. They’re finishing dinner. He still has dessert. If David is pissed now, he’ll be pissed later, and he made it for Jeffrey. Then he can leave. Jeffrey says, okay. Justin wonders why David did that, and Jeffrey says Justin knows.

Benny sees a news reporter interviewing Landon after the White House dinner. The reporter asks about Candice, and Landon says she and Charles have a special relationship. The reporter asks if they’ll be getting married, and Landon says, we’ll see. The reporter asks about the visit, and Landon says they loved her, and they all had fun being there. Benny tries to call Candace, but gets voicemail. He shouts for Hanna to come. She’s lying in bed, and says, not now. He goes into her bedroom, and says she needs to see this. He puts on the TV. The reporter is saying that Candace is a third year law student. Benny’s phone rings. It’s Mitch, who asks if he’s watching the news. He can’t believe she did it. She got the President. Benny asks if that’s the guy who came to the hospital. Mitch says, yes, but he had no idea. He says she has to be careful. Politicians are killers. Benny says Candace can handle herself, and Mitch says they’ll find out. Benny asks how Mitch’s uncle is doing, and Mitch says, all right. Benny asks if Mitch talked to him. Mitch asks, about what? and Benny says, the interest. Mitch says, he’s not budging. Does Benny have a plan? Benny says he was just talking to his mom about it. Mitch tells him, stay in touch, and let him know.

At the Iron Bone, the guy sitting next to Mitch at the bar asks if that wasn’t the girl who was in there. Mitch didn’t tell him that she was connected like that. Mitch asks if he wants to hit that now, but the guy says he didn’t vote for him. Mitch wonders when he’s given a sh*t, and the guy tells him, go buy a car. Mitch says if the guy has a problem with his car, buy him one, which totally sounds like what I would say. The guy says Mitch doesn’t have the money, and Mitch says he’s not kissing Vinnie’s ass like him. In five years, his car will be worth fifty grand. Vintage. The guy says, more like garbage, and Mitch says, ride that bike, dude. Dude tells the bartender he can’t stand Mitch.

Kathryn tells Jim that he needs to calm down. He says, don’t tell him what to do. He wonders how she stays calm, and she says she has drugs. He says that’s why he’s in this mess. How can she keep drugs there with his son? She says she didn’t think… and he says she never does. She says she thinks he’s an ass. He says she needs to go somewhere and sleep off, but she says she needs another drink. Then she’s going to call her Latin lover, and have him put her to sleep. Jim says she’s pathetic, and walks out.

Kathryn calls the hotel. She’s told Roderick isn’t there, and says she’s been calling all day. Kathryn Cryer. I’m your boss, bitch. She says to transfer her to the bar. Rocky answers, and she asks for Roderick. Roderick is standing there, shaking his head. Rocky says, actually, he is, and she says, put him on the phone. Roderick says, you bastard, and takes the phone. She says she’s been calling all day, and he says he’s been busy. She says she’s not the type who likes to be ignored, but he says he wasn’t ignoring her. He’s been busy. She asks if she detects a tone in his voice, and he says, no. He has a customer right now, and she says, make them wait. He says he’s going to check them in and go home. She says, no he isn’t. She’s coming in for a nightcap, and wants to see him. He doesn’t think so. She asks if it’s about Jim, and he says it’s about him, and he says no. She says his ass better be there when she arrives, and he hangs up. Rocky asks, did he just hang up on her? and Roderick says he did. Kathryn looks at the phone, and says, did he just hang up? Rocky says, she’s going to be pissed. Is Roderick trying to get fired? Roderick says, no. He’s trying to get to her. Watch the master at work. She’s used to getting what she wants, and the rich want what they can’t have. Rocky asks if he’s been reading a book on how to trap a wealthy woman. Roderick says he could write it. Watch him work. Rocky tells him, watch out for her husband. Roderick says, watch and see. When he leaves, Rocky says, that guy’s nuts.

Benny answers a knock at the door. It’s Mitch. He asks if Benny was watching the news. His sister’s with the President; it’s crazy. That’s her man now. He asks how Benny is doing, and Benny says, not good. Mitch says Benny called him; what’s up? Has he found a way to get the money? Benny says, no, and Mitch says Benny is wasting his time. Benny asks what Mitch thinks they’ll do to him. He can have a leg broke. He thinks he should go down there and take it like a man. Mitch says Benny doesn’t get it. It don’t work like that. They’ll break both legs, and still want the money. it’s accruing interest every week Benny doesn’t pay seen him. He knows a guy who borrowed $10K, and had to pay back $100K in eight weeks. This ain’t no bank. He told Benny not to do this in the first place. Now it’s legit. He wishes he could help. Benny suggests Mitch take out a loan, and Mitch laughs. He says, from who? and Benny says from his family. They won’t break his legs. Mitch says he’s not doing that. If he borrows money from them, that means he’s in the family. Benny asks, what’s wrong with that? and Mitch says, it ain’t cool. It’s hard enough trying separate from them. Benny says how about if he works? but Mitch says, it ain’t gonna happen. Benny asks if it’s because he’s Black, but Mitch says he’s not in the family. They only let family do things that make them money. He has no ideas or answers. Benny says he doesn’t need an I told you so. Hanna appears, and says, so they’re going to kill him if he doesn’t pay. Benny tells her, go on to bed, but she keeps talking. Mitch says, hi, and Hanna says, hi Mitch, without taking her eyes from Benny. She says he borrowed from people who are that bad? Benny says he had to do something. She says he has to deal with it then. He says if he took the interest from the money Candace got… She says, goodnight. They’re going to the bank in the morning, and giving it all back, and she doesn’t want to hear it. Benny says, it will be all right. She says, if he says so, and goes back upstairs. Mitch has an idea. Go to Candace for the money. She’s with the President now. Maybe he’s wired her to some account. It’s only $20K. Maybe she’ll give it to him. It’s worth a shot. She’s the one who got him into the situation with his truck. Benny says, might as well.

Charles and Candace go back to the hotel. Candace’s phone rings. She says it’s her brother, and Charles says her family probably saw her on the news. She asks, when? and he says, didn’t she see all the cameras outside the White House? She does know a press pool follows him and records everything, right? She says, yeah. She’ll talk to Benny later. Charles says, now where were they? He tells her that she’s gotten quiet. She says they were talking in the car, and he says, then she got quiet. She says, it’s a lot, and he tells her it helps to talk through it. She says, what part? Being here with President Elect when they just came from the White House? That doesn’t happen every day to a Black girl from Savannah. He knows it’s overwhelming, but she has to let him know what’s going on in her head. She tells him that he said she was a hot piece of Black ass. Charles says, what? Who? and she says, the President. Charles asks, when? and she says, at the table. He says, the President said those words, hot piece of Black ass? He takes out his phone, and says he’ll take care of this. She says that’s why she didn’t tell him. She knew he’d be upset. So the President knows what kind of person she is. He says it’s time the President knows what kind of person he is. She says she shouldn’t have told him. She ruined a perfectly good night. She’s been called a lot worse. He says, by a head of state? She says, no, and he says, exactly. She can see why it’s so disrespectful. She says, he’s so cool. What about the game in the car? He says that was before he knew the President said that. She tells him, let it go for the night. Charles doesn’t know if he can. She asks if that’s a challenge. Does he want her to take his mind off things? She kisses him, and asks if he wants more. He says, it’s a start. She wants to take a shower, and motions for him to come closer. She tells him, undress for her, calling him Mr. President. He says she should count herself lucky there isn’t a pole in there, but he could put one in the Oval. She helps him take off his clothes, and leads him to the shower.

Kathryn comes downstairs, and Jim asks where the hell she’s going. She says, out. He says he asked a question, and she says, she answered. He wonders if she’s going to the hotel, and she wonders if he’s going to hell. He asks if she has any idea what time it is, and she says, time for a nightcap. Wyatt pops out of his room, and tells Jim, get out of her way. She’s trying get to her man whore. He tells her, hurry back. He has a surprise for her. She leaves, and Jim tells Wyatt, go to his room. Wyatt says he has a surprise for Jim too. Jim says, now.

RK kisses Veronica on the couch. He asks, what’s wrong with her? and she asks if he got her jewelry. She tells him, no woman wants a man who’s sweaty, but he says, some like it. She says he had his chance. He’s a disgusting problem, and she wants him to get her jewelry. He says she gave him her son’s address. He’ll do what she wants. Nothing sexual. She tells him, don’t disgust her, and RK says, he’s gay. She asked RK to flirt with him, and get his mind off that cop. He’s got it, and can do it. She says, this will be worth her jewelry? He says he’ll have her son eating out of the palm of his hand. She says he can’t just go to the house. Her son is living with his father. She tells him, lay low, and she’ll figure it out. He says this is going to cover him for her jewelry, right? but she says he’ll be owing her for a very long time. Now get the hell out of her house. He asks if she’ll let him use a car then. He needs to get around. She laughs, and he leaves. She calls David’s voicemail, and say she’s still waiting for him to come back.

Kathryn walks into the Artisian. Roderick meets her. She asks how he is, and he says, good. She says, not that good, hanging up on her. He says he didn’t want talk to her anymore, and she asks, why is that? He’s sorry… She says she doesn’t have time for this. Get Rocky, and meet her upstairs. He doesn’t think so, and she says, excuse me? He says she heard him. She doesn’t think he heard her. The only reason he stayed here is because she wanted to see him. He says, not true. He was tied up with guests. She says, bullsh*t. They’re going upstairs. He says, they’re not going anywhere. He’s not doing threesomes anymore. She says she wants to, but he doesn’t care. She’s just using him. She asks what this is about, and he says he can’t keep doing this. If she gets tired of him, what does he get out of it? She says he’s the most excitement she’s had in long time. He says, so he’s just a toy. She says he’s not, and he asks what he gets out of it. She asks what he wants; a raise? He says, no, and she says, more money? He wants her. She laughs, and says, no, he doesn’t. Roderick asks if he’s gotten in her head, that husband of hers. He’s gotten in so deep, she can’t see what a beautiful woman she is. She says she was a beautiful woman, but when she looks in the mirror, she see the years have gone downhill. She’s in her 50s, and it would be foolish to think she could compete with a thirty-year-old he might be seeing. He says he’s not seeing anyone else. He wants her. If he can’t have her the way he wants, fire him now, but if she comes at him like she wants him, he’s not a piece of meat. He walks away, and she says, okay.

She goes to the bar, and orders scotch on the rocks. I retch because I hate scotch, even the smell. She watches Roderick talk to a customer. She asks if Rocky is free, and Rocky tells her Roderick is serious. She says he’d better make it a double.

Justin washes the dishes while Jeffrey dries. Justin asks, who keeps calling. Jeffrey says, his dad. Justin says, sorry about that, and Jeffrey says he shouldn’t have put a gun to David’s head. Justin says David shouldn’t have sent people after him. Jeffrey knows, and Justin asks why Jeffrey is sticking up for him. Jeffrey says he’s not. He’d better go. Justin doesn’t want him to leave. He notices Jeffrey got a text, and asks if it was Jeffrey’s dad. Jeffrey says it was, and Justin asks what he said. Jeffrey says, nothing. He just wants him to come home already. Justin says Jeffrey put his phone face down. Is he hiding something? Jeffrey says, no, but Justin wants to see. Jeffrey says he’s not doing that. It’s his phone. Justin says Jeffrey can go through his phone, but Jeffrey doesn’t want to. Justin says Jeffrey can see all the nasty texts from his wife, co-workers, boss, mother, and brothers. Jeffrey says it’s his personal business, but Justin wants to see his phone. Jeffrey says, no, and Justin says it’s because he’s lying. Jeffery says, enough; stop. Justin says, they trust each other, right? Jeffrey says he’s not giving Justin his phone. They just had a nice dinner. Can they not do this? Justin keeps insisting, and Jeffrey says he’s going.

Jeffrey’s phone rings, and Justin grabs it. He asks, who is this? and Wyatt says, damn. Is that guy still messing around with him? Justin says he is, and asks again who it is. Wyatt tells him to put Jeffrey on the phone. Justin says he told Wyatt never to call Jeffrey. Wyatt says he’ll call as much as he pleases. Give Jeffrey the phone. Justin says he means it. If Wyatt calls again, he’ll break Wyatt’s jaw. He says, wait. Was Wyatt trying to get ahold of him? Does the straight boy need a fix? Get on his knees again? Wyatt says he didn’t do a damn thing, but Justin says he wanted to. Wyatt says, go to hell, and Justin tells him, don’t call again. Jeffrey says, give him his phone. Justin says he’s been texting Madison. I say, uh-oh. Justin says Jeffrey texted Madison his address. They were having a nice, romantic dinner, and Jeffrey texted the address. What else is in there? Jeffrey says he’s not doing this again. Keep it.

He heads for the door. Justin takes out two guns. He holds one to Jeffrey’s head, and one to his own head.

Next time, Jeffrey says only one gun has a bullet, Benny asks Jim if he wants to go again, and Kathryn tells Jim she’s going to let Hanna keep all of the money.

🐉 Dracarys Or Bust

I don’t know what everyone is so upset about. The remaining dragon is fine.

Varys told a kitchen maid, the greater the risk the greater the reward, when she told him Dany wouldn’t eat, and I had a mental picture of him looking at a medieval motivational poster. (Please note the connection of dots below that I totally missed here.) He tried to get Jon to reveal who he really is, but Jon said Dany was his queen. Varys told him, every time a Targaryen is born, the gods toss a coin and the world holds its breath. Tyrion told Dany about Varys meddling, and Dany though Jon betrayed her by telling Sansa, who told Tyrion. Dany said it didn’t matter now, and looked older than sixteen for the first time. Grey Worm took Varys to Tyrion, Dany and Jon. Varys hoped he deserved what was coming, and was proved wrong. Dany sentenced him to die, and it was dracarys and a roasted Varys. I liked him, but well, there you go.

Dany gave Grey Worm Missandel’s old collar, and he burned it. Jon said Dany was his queen and she wanted to get busy, but it was a hard no, which didn’t make her too happy. Tyrion told Dany the people of King’s Landing were prisoners. She said she was going to be merciful… to future generations. Tyrion looked sick. She said the next time Tyrion failed her would be the last. Arya and the Hound were on a mission to kill Cersei. Jaime got caught, and Tyrion went to see him. He told Jaime that Cersei would die unless he could get her to stay her course of action. The city was going to fall, He should escape with Cersei, and start a new life. He said, tens of thousands of innocent lives, and one not-so-innocent dwarf was a fair trade. If it hadn’t been for Jaime, he wouldn’t have survived childhood. At King’s Landing, Cersei was like, see ya, and locked herself in the Keep. Arya and the Hound managed to muscle their way through the crowd,, but Jaime had noon such luck. Waiting on his Iron Boat, (sounds like) Urine Greyjoy kept checking the sky. Why she didn’t do this last week, I’ll never know, but everyone got darcarysed by Dany on Drogon, including Urine. This caused the crew at the city door to scramble around, but they got singed as well. I guess if you want something done right…

Zoolander headed Cersei’s army, and everyone stood around until King’s Landing was blown apart from the inside. Grey Worm led the charge, but I don’t know why he even bothered at that point. Zoolander tried to run, but got trampled, and it was pretty funny. Then he literally got stabbed in the back by Grey Worm. Cersei watched from her off-ivory tower as her city burned. She said all they needed was one good shot. Old guy Hand was like, give up, but Cersei stuck with being delusional, saying the city hadn’t fallen yet, and it wouldn’t today. I laughed when the dragon flew over the city, and everyone scurried to get anywhere but there. (Sorry, I never had much investment in any of the characters, except Tyrion and the dragons, and sometimes find the over-the-top stuff a bit Monty Pythonish.) Then I was really laughing when the head soldier dude threw his sword down, and Cersei’s idea that they’d protect her to the death didn’t happen. Jaime snuck around the back way.

The bell rang, indicating surrender, but Dany didn’t care. She flew straight at the tower Cersei was in, with everyone in the city running like Godzilla was coming. Dracarys was everywhere, and there was a melee with the remaining soldiers, where Jon just stood around spacing out, and Grey Worm single-handedly creamed about five dozen soldiers. He was like Michonne on Walking Dead. Tyrion was like, wtf?

Somehow, Urine survived, and he and Jaime ended up in the same cave. Urine said he became king once he screwed the queen. They fought, and I was like, oh please, don’t let Jaime get killed by this loser. It looked like Jaime was a goner, but that was still debatable. Cersei cried a tear, and old guy Hand said they’d find a better place to wait out the storm. She let him lead her away.

Jaime managed to crawl to his sword, and stab the crap out of Urine. He stomped off, while Urine’s last words were that he got Jaime, and he was going to die thinking he was the man who killed Jaime Lannister. I think the line would have been better had he said the Kingslayer, but that’s just me. The Hound told Arya to go home, but she wanted to kill Cersei. He said revenge was all he cared about his whole life, and look at him. Did she want to be that? He said if she went with him, she’d die. She thanked him, and got the hell out of there, as we all would had he given us that option.

We found out the Mountain looked like Uncle Fester under his helmet. No wonder he’s always so pissed off. Jaime found Cersei, and stopped my fun in watching her be scared for the first time. They clutched each other. The Hound shoved his sword all the way through the Mountain, but it was just a flesh wound, and the Mountain pulled it out, and made like Yul Brynner in the original Westworld. I was hoping Arya would save him, as the Mountain tossed him around like a football, but she was taking a similar pummeling, trying to run with the crowd. The Hound heard me say, get his eyeball, and stabbed the Mountain in it. While the Mountain struggled to pull out the blade, they both went over the side of the tower into the burning city. By now, Jon was all, fall back, like an hour too late. Arya tried to help the people hiding, but ended up in flames herself… or so we thought. Cersei whined to Jaime that she didn’t want to die like this. She should have thought of that before. Idiot narcissist that he is, Jaime said nothing else mattered but them. Everything fell around them.

Arya rose from the ashes. Sadly without dragon babies. She got on a white horse that seemingly appeared out of nowhere, and rode away. Next time – the finale – Tyrion surveys the damage, and Dany rules (?).

Now who’s going to clean up all that dracarys?

💭 What We Thought…

Theories about Jaime, including mine, bite the dust along with King’s Landing.


🔥 What Happened…

I was possibly too concerned about the remaining dragon to connect the dots.


Foreshadows come to pass.


🐲 How Many Felt…

My favorite recap.


📷 Nice Photos!

Trying to end on an upbeat note.


🌴 Due to time constraints (i.e. I need time to sleep), and a Mother’s Day debacle that infringed on said time, I’m begging off The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills until tomorrow. Both LVP and Giggy (!) made an appearance, which made it worthwhile.

🛀 Soap Within Soap…

While there have been Rows since then, this is the original.

May 13, 2019 – Oscar’s Celebration, James Walks Out, Postponed Throne & Wedding Reactions


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Josslyn tells Jax that she’s sorry, and he asks, why? She says he drove to school to watch her practice, and she barely made it through the stretches. He says it wasn’t far to go, and she’s having emotional trauma. If she’d been hit by a car, she wouldn’t be expected at practice. She says she hates quitting. He tells her not to think of it like that, and give herself credit for getting dressed and showing up. She says she doesn’t know how to do any of it.

Sonny says Josslyn is home early, and Carly says, it was too much too soon. Sonny thinks it’s good for her to get out. She has to find a way to figure it out, and it’s better than being curled in a ball in the dark. Carly says, it’s going to happen, and he says, when it does, they’ll be there.

Alexis goes to Charlie’s, and thanks Julian for rehiring Kristina. He says Kristina is the best thing to happen in the last couple days, and Alexis says, it’s so sad about Oscar. Julian says he admired Oscar. In the short time he was alive, he really lived. Not many people can truly say that.

Cameron picks up garbage in the park. Franco says he’s off the clock, and doesn’t get extra credit for overtime. He asks if Cameron wants to get something at Kelly’s. He knows Cameron wants him to stop doing this bonding garbage. He knows Cameron can’t stand him, and thinks he’s only doing this to impress Cameron’s mother and brothers. He gets how Cameron feels about him, but he doesn’t agree or understand. The more he knows Cameron, the more he admires him. He’s going to keep at it, until one day they can do better than tolerate each other. He’s not just doing this for Cameron’s mom – who he loves completely – but he’s doing it for himself. One day, Cameron will respect him. He knows he hasn’t gotten there yet, but he will.

Drew, Ned, Olivia and Monica watch Leo and Danny play in the yard. Monica says she loves watching them. It makes it easier to bear. Kim arrives with an urn. She says, it’s strange. She’s been preparing for this day for a while. It’s here now. Oscar is gone, and she’s not sure what to do. Ned says her son was way ahead of her on that one. Oscar had a plan.

Josslyn asks Jax, what if it never gets better, and she feels like this forever? It’s like she’s drowning and can’t break through the water. He says, it will get better. He’s been there, and so has she. Does she remember how she felt when Morgan died? She couldn’t go on, but she did anyway, even though it was hard every day. He promises that time heals everything. Her phone dings, and she says, omg, Oscar.

Carly tells Sonny, the memorial service is today; no black. Josslyn comes in, and asks if Carly got the text, and she says she just did. It’s the last thing Josslyn feels like doing. She’s not ready. She asks if she has to go, and Carly says, no, but thinks she’ll deeply regret it if she doesn’t. Sonny says they’re going to be there, and Jax says they’ll do it together. Josslyn goes upstairs to change, and Carly sighs.

At the hospital, Terry asks if Elizabeth got the text about a celebration for Oscar. Elizabeth says he did. Terry says, he was such a wonderful kid, and they hug. Terry tells Elizabeth that she’ll see her at five.

Trina finds Cameron, and asks if he got the text. He doesn’t think he wants to go, but she says Josslyn needs them. Oscar is counting on them, and as friends they have to step up. Cameron asks if she wants to go together. She tells him to go change. He smells like literal garbage.

Ned says Oscar was adamant about not wanting a funeral. He didn’t want sadness surrounding the day. He wanted them to come together, not to mourn, but raise a glass to his life. Olivia tells them Oscar said they could say nice things about him, but only if they want to. Ned says, the point is for them to help each other, lean on each other, and in remember him, perhaps bring a smile to their faces. Drew says, if that’s what Oscar wanted, then that’s exactly what he’s going to get.

On the Quartermaine patio, Ned puts up a collage of Oscar’s pictures, and Olivia sets the tables. Michael and Sam arrive first. Sam tells Michael that she got the memo; no black. Olivia tells them to just hang out, and he’ll explain when everyone gets there. Jason joins them, and asks how Sam is holding up. She says, fine. Michael says he knew they were planning something, but kept the details quiet. Josslyn and Jax come in, and Josslyn hugs Michael. She says she’s supposed to be fine, but doesn’t know how to deal. What if start she starts crying, and can’t stop? Jax says, If it happens, it happens; it’s okay. Alexis sees Jax, and says, circumstances notwithstanding, it’s great to see him. He has a wonderful daughter; strong and supportive. Death isn’t easy for anyone, especially the young. She wishes he’d had a chance to know Oscar, but he feels like he did. He’s glad Oscar and Josslyn had each other, even if they’re time was cut short. Jason asks Carly how Josslyn is. Carly says she knows Josslyn will be okay eventually, but until she gets there… Jason says, until she gets there, she has them. Sam hugs Jax, and tells him that he should be proud of his daughter. She’s special. He says she’s been making him proud since birth, but this is a whole new level. Cameron and Trina walk in, and Josslyn says they made it. Cameron asks if she thought they wouldn’t, and Josslyn says she almost didn’t. Trina asks how she’s doing, and Josslyn says, terrible. Trina says, awful, and Cameron says, the worst. Trina says at least they’re all on the same page. Cameron says he was thinking about the trip to Niagara Falls before Oscar got sick. They laugh about Cameron’s driving. Trina reminds him of the old lady who said, move out of the way, grandpa. He’s glad they find it funny. Oscar had his back. He says, sorry, and Josslyn says, don’t be. Trina says they have hers. Cameron goes to see his mom, and Trina says Oscar wanted her to tell Josslyn something. She should still hike up the mountain, whether she wants to or not. To the top; no turning back. Trina says, he wanted her to get her hike on. He loved her, and she was the best thing that ever happened to him. They hug.

Monica is glad Jason is there, and he says, Oscar was family. She says, a family that’s getting smaller by the minute. Jason says he’s still there, and he’s not going anywhere. Drew approaches and says, neither is he. He has an envelope for Jason, and says Oscar wanted him to open it with Monica there. Jason reads Oscar’s first letter. Oscar knows he doesn’t spend a lot of time there, but he’s come to think of the Quartermaine house as home. There’s only one thing missing; a treehouse for the kids. Jason says he had the plans drawn up, but there’s one catch. Oscar wants Jason and his dad to build it together. When they’re done, and the kids are climbing on it, know he’ll be there too. Jason asks if Drew is in. He’s in.

Ned thanks everyone for coming to Oscar’s celebration. And it is Oscar’s celebration. He was very clear on what he wanted. He said the worst part of any funeral is the funeral. The good stuff comes afterward when everyone talks, laughs, and tells stories. He decided to skip the morose stuff, and go straight to the party. Ned says if they want to remember Oscar, do what he wanted, and if they feel compelled to share a funny story, do. He’d rather have them smile than have tears. Olivia says, it’s going to be hard, but try. Ned says, for Oscar, and they all repeat, for Oscar.

Olivia says, the floor is open if anyone wants to share a story. Michael gets up, and says he knows they’re supposed to tell stories about Oscar. He doesn’t have one, but he knew Oscar was really brave when Oscar started dating his sister. She can be a bit much; strong-willed and opinionated. Carly says she doesn’t know where Josslyn got that from. Michael says Josslyn is extremely competitive, and he was worried guys would be intimated, but not Oscar. He saw what an amazing woman she is. He was understanding, and got her sense of humor. He got how to make her laugh. It wasn’t long before Michael realized she was safe with Oscar. He was a true gentleman; a true Quartermaine. He bonded with their grandmother, and accepted them as family. They’re lucky to have known him. He will be missed.

Cameron gets up. He says, in the beginning, he and Oscar weren’t friends. Not until he started dating Josslyn. On the 4th of July, Oscar and Josslyn were waiting for the fireworks to start, and Cameron showed up, and started eating their snacks. If Josslyn had been his girlfriend, he would have said, get lost, but Oscar made room. That’s what Oscar did. No matter who you were, he always had room, and he’d keep making room – until you pissed him off. Then he punched you in the face. He tells them, Michael said Oscar was brave. When Oscar found out he had cancer, they really saw what brave is. Fighting a losing battle, refusing to give up. He kept waiting for Oscar to get better, or get angry and feel sorry for himself. He had his moments, but he never stayed in them when he did. He stuck it out until the end, and gave every day to the people he loved. It was easier to let go, but he held on. He was brave and courageous, and Cameron is grateful he knew Oscar. Josslyn mouths, thank you.

Carly tells Josslyn that she doesn’t have to do this. Josslyn says she knows, but gets up. She had a crush on Oscar from the beginning, the quiet and serious new guy. They didn’t cross paths much at school, but when they were both working at Lila’s Kids, they had a chance to talk. It was so easy. They actually talked about life; things that mattered. Over that summer, her crush faded and she got to see the real Oscar then. That guy was so much better than the one she dreamt of in her head. He was funny, and smart, and a ridiculously good listener. There were things they didn’t have in common; things she liked and he didn’t, and vice versa, but he was still her biggest supporter. She hopes he felt like she was his. Kim says, he did. Josslyn says, Cameron is right about Oscar. By the end, he wanted to live more than anything, but knew that wasn’t happening. He was going to a different place, but he wasn’t afraid. The part he hated most was leaving them there to be sad. So this having a party, skipping the bad stuff and going to the good, is exactly who he was. Not that the hard part isn’t there – it is – but it’s about where you put the emphasis. He wanted the emphasis on the good. She’s not there yet, but she’s going to really try. The good part was getting to know Oscar, and love him and be loved by him, and she never wants to forget.

Drew says, now’s as good a time as any, and gets up. He says, it’s a scary thing to find out you have a teenage son. He wasn’t there for Oscar’s childhood; the hard times when you need a father. Intellectually, it’s a huge bond, but there’s no blueprint. Oscar made it easy. The more time they spent together, the more he wanted to spend. He was endlessly fascinated by his son; the way his brain worked, his curiosity and generosity. He’s guarded, but Oscar wasn’t. He was open. His heart was too big not to share it. They would go on hikes, and Oscar would talk the entire way. He’d tell Drew about his life, and ask about Drew’s; the six years he can remember. Oscar was a gift. He wanted more, but in the time he had, he was able to be a father, and a chance to make it work. He’s eternally grateful. To know Oscar is to love him, but to be his dad is forever. He’ll always carry Oscar in his heart.

Ned says Oscar didn’t want the party to end there. To honor Oscar’s last wishes, please follow him to the park. Cameron, Josslyn, and Trina join hands as they leave.

At the park, Olivia tells the guests, every bag is full of flower seeds. Ned says, Oscar deserved more than a few bouquets. Instead, they’ll have an entire field, and thanks to the PC Parks and Recreation Department, the field will now be known as Oscar’s Meadow. He lifts a tarp to reveal a plaque embedded in a rock. Olivia says, the idea is to spread a few seeds today, and hopefully, in a month there will be a sea of flowers. Olivia asks if they’re ready. She counts to three, and the seeds are thrown. Ned says, this officially concludes Oscar’s celebration. Kim has something else to say. The celebration was beautiful from start to finish. It had Oscar written all over it. She thanks them, and says it was an honor and privilege to be Oscar’s mother. She had him as a single mom, and essentially all of his life, it was him and her. When she got his cancer diagnosis, it occurred to her that she’d been selfish. She hadn’t given him the opportunity to know his family. That’s why they came to Port Charles. She’s glad they did. Oscar just blossomed. He met Josslyn, he made friends, and had places to go and people to see, He got to know all of them, and got to love them. She can’t express enough how much they enriched his life. Monica opened her arms to Oscar and welcomed him into the family. She taught him what it meant to be Quartermaine, and it gave him comfort knowing where he came from. Oscar was thrilled when they found Drew. The things they shared, and that Drew taught him. How he loved Drew. Drew listened to him, understood, and supported him, and gave him courage in the end when hers ran out. She takes Josslyn’s hands, and thanks her for being Oscar’s first love. Anyone with less strength would have run. She thanks Josslyn for being her. She hopes Josslyn comes back to the meadow often, and thinks of Oscar. She hopes Josslyn goes on to live an incredibly happy life because it’s what Oscar would have wanted for her. They hug.

Back at the Quartermaine’s, everyone mingles. Drew says Ned planned the end with Oscar, and he doesn’t have the words to thank him. Ned says Oscar loved Drew, and he’s so very sorry he’s gone. Drew says, the meadow. Olivia says it can’t make up for the loss, but it put some beauty back in the world. Drew hugs Olivia, and wonders if Oscar will be there every day. Ned believes he still will be.

Franco tells Elizabeth, Cameron was impressive. Elizabeth says, he always comes through when it matters. Franco says, he’s a really good kid. It will get better soon between them, he promises. She says she has no doubt, and they kiss.

Carly asks Jax how lucky are they. He says Josslyn has a long road, and Carly says she jumped a hurdle today. He says there are more to come, but Carly says Josslyn will take them.

Josslyn asks what Cameron and Trina think about spending the 4th of July at Oscar’s Meadow. Cameron says, sounds like a plan. He tells Josslyn that she did great, and she says, him too. Trina says, what about her? She’s their pillar of support, the ballast that steadies the ship. Josslyn says, what she is, is a really good friend. They decide to go to Kelly’s. Josslyn and Cameron leave to ask their moms first. Josslyn says, ballast. Impressive.

Sam hugs Drew. She’d asks if he’s okay, but knows he’s not. She wanted him to know she thinks he’s a great dad. He proved it every day. He thanks her for saying that. The celebration was perfect. It was everything Oscar wanted, but he can’t stop wishing it was a birthday party, and Oscar was here, laughing with his friends, his arm around his girl. He didn’t get enough time with Oscar, and needs her help. She says, of course (🍷); anything. He says he wants be the best father for Scout. She says he is. He wants Scout to know he loves her and he’ll be there for her to support her. He doesn’t want to hold too tight or make her feel like she’s glass. He doesn’t want her know he’s afraid of losing her too. She says she knows him, and knows he’s not going to give into fear. He’ll give their daughter the best of himself; all of himself, every day. The same way he did for Oscar. She hugs him, and says she’s so sorry.

Kim touches the plaque. Sonny approaches and asks if she wants to be alone. He can leave. He knows she doesn’t feel like it now, but she’ll come to a point where she’ll get comfortable in knowing the lives Oscar touched. Right now, it feels like a void, or like she has to make a choice between the emptiness she feels or the rage she has because life is unfair. Oscar wouldn’t have wanted that. She’s gotta keep going. She’s got to focus on what she loved in him, and how much he loved her. He doesn’t know when, but she’ll find peace in that. He takes her hand, and says he’s sorry. She thanks him through her tears, and he leaves. She flashes back to Oscar asking her not to put the Ashbery Award bumper sticker on the car, and her saying, it’s the first award of many; one day, they can say they knew him when. She looks up to the sky, and says, I love you my beautiful boy; I always will, and she cries

Tomorrow, Felicia sees Robert with the engagement ring, Nina tells Willow it’s an unacceptable situation, and Julian tells Doc to get his hands off his sister.

Vanderpump Rules – Reunion Part Two

Brittany asks why James apologized, and said he cares about Jax. James says he changed his mind, and he doesn’t give a flying. She says, the real him, and Jax applauds. Tom says Jax was talking sh*t about James’s girlfriend, so James talked sh*t about her. Brittany says James was talking about her family. Tom is supposed to be their best man. Tom asks if that means he can’t disagree. They’re all shouting and talking over each other, and Andy tells them, STFU. Lisa says, yay. Andy decides to take a break, and Jax tells Brittany, Tom is out of the wedding party.

The others leave for the moment, and Lisa tells James, sit and relax. He starts crying, and says he’s in shambles. She tells him that he’s got this. He’s doing okay, but he can’t be saying something about Jax’s father, and defame him. James says he had seven of them coming after him.

In the back, Brittany asks Tom why he won’t hold James accountable. He says he does, but he had nine people coming at him. Apparently, one of them can’t count.

Lisa tells James, it doesn’t matter.

Jax tells Tom that he doesn’t have to be in the wedding. Jax asks why he’s being attacked, and Tom says he’s not.

Puffy! Lisa sits with Puffy on her lap, and says, he’s a therapy dog. Jax says, and people say their show isn’t real. Andy and the others come back. Andy asks Jax in what way Jax has changed, and he says he’s not attacking everyone anymore, which is kind of funny in this context. Andy says Tom claimed he might go back to his old ways; he’s a recovering sociopath. Tom says he knows Jax gets affected by circumstances, and when the high wears off, he’s back to his old ways. He’s concerned. Jax wonders why Tom can’t say he’s proud. He’s damned if does, and damned if he doesn’t. Tom says he’s concerned for Jax and Brittany’s well-being. He’s being a friend, and coming from the right place, so he had to check with Jax. We flash back to Tom saying he hopes the change in Jax isn’t coming from Brittany being there when Jax’s dad passed away. Lisa thinks Jax is a good person, but he’s still self-serving. He realizes his life is better with Brittany in it, and relishes and treasures her for that reason. Andy says he seemed closed off and dismissive in therapy at times. We flash back to that, and Andy asks how that made Brittany feel. She says he was closed off, and it was annoying sometimes. Jax says it was his third or fourth time in therapy. Brittany says she never went before, and was nervous. Jax says when he did something wrong, he would just forget about it, but he was 100% wrong. Lisa says he’s an easy target. Andy asks if James thinks Jax is a changed man. James says they got in a fight, but he’s seen a change. Good for you, mate. Lisa tells Jax that James acknowledged he’s changed, but Jax says James doesn’t give a sh*t. James agrees that he doesn’t. Jax asks what he does care about? Kristen says he doesn’t care about anything.

Andy says Tom spilled the beans about her and Lala taking their relationship to the next level. He asks Ariana if they’d made a pact to keep the night a secret. Ariana says she thought it was unspoken that unless all three of them were on board, it wouldn’t be shared. Tom says he felt bad about it. He’d just picked up his car after eight hours of car shopping, and they were wasted when he picked them up. Ariana says she doesn’t even remember the car, and asks if Lala remembers getting in a fight with someone. Lala asks, what happened? and Ariana says she almost got in a fight, but they left. Andy asks if Tom was involved. Ariana says she wanted him involved, and Lala says Ariana kept calling his name. Then she told Ariana to get in the back, and Ariana asked Tom if it was okay. Ariana says she has manners. Andy asks if Rand knew, and Lala says, no, but her mom did. Andy says Tom seemed annoyed, but it’s every guy’s fantasy. Tom says he was exhausted, and just wanted a beer, but they kept telling him to drive them around. Andy asks if Lala identifies as gender fluid, and she says she’s hooked up with chicks, but prefers a pp rather than a vv. He asks how Schwartz would feel if Katie hooked up with a girl. He says, she has. He’s not opposed to it, unless they fell in love, and Katie tells him, be careful what he wishes for. Lisa says everyone has hooked up with a girl except her. Andy says, and him. He says, now Brittany has to come clean about her and Kristen. Brittany says she remembers making out and touching boobs, but nothing more. Lala says Ariana had been talking about being insecure. We flash back to her saying she didn’t even want anyone looking at her vagina.

Andy says we watched Ariana and Stassi forge a friendship. Stassi’s persistence and Ariana not giving a… We flash back to Ariana saying she didn’t give a flying. Andy asks at what point did Ariana decide she liked Stassi, but Ariana doesn’t think she has a moment. She got tired of fighting it. Stassi asks why Ariana keeps denying her love for her. She claims to have her muted on Instagram, and doesn’t remember making out. She’s calling bullsh*t. Andy asks how they came up with Winter Is Coming as a theme for their joint birthday party. Stassi says they both love Game of Thrones, and they’re both ice queens. Andy asks if Scheana is jealous of their friendship, but Scheana says she’s the one who tries to get everyone to be friends, and she’d given up. Ariana says, maybe that was the moment; Scheana gave up.  

Andy tells us that TomTom is a smash hit. Schwartz says they had Ariana Grande, Miley Cyrus, Lady Gaga, Paula Abdul, and Selena Gomez come in all in the same week. Lisa says some of them are friends of friends. Jax says Lady Gaga wanted to see Brittany’s boobs. Brittany says, unfortunately, she wasn’t there or she would have flashed Gaga. Jax had to show a picture, and Andy asks if Gaga liked them. Jax says she asked who Brittany’s doctor was. Andy moves on to the Daily Mail party. Everyone except Kristen was there. We flash back to Kristen lying in bed with the dogs, eating pasta. Andy asks, why not let her come? but Lisa says it wasn’t her party. None of her friends there. James was DJing, the place belongs to the Toms, and it was Jax’s birthday. She didn’t want problems, and it wasn’t her place to invite anyone. Andy asks what Kristen thinks, and Kristen says Lisa likes to hold on to a grudge. Lisa says Kristen likes to jump into other people’s business. Andy says the TomTom opening was so great; the excitement, and pride Tom took in choosing the outfits and surprising his lover (i.e. Schwartz) with a motorcycle and sidecar. It was epic, and Andy kind of teared up. We flash back to Tom presenting Schwartz with his biking gear. Andy says it was a classic that he ran out of gas. Is he a motorcycle guy now? Tom says, more like a sidecar guy. He likes to take people for a spin, and asks if Andy wants a ride. Andy asks if Ariana is okay with it. They might get closer. Ariana says they did get him his own helmet, and Andy says, let’s go!

They go outside. Andy is given his helmet, and gets in. They start to go for a ride, but something goes wrong with the starter. A guy helps push them, and they take off again, but it stalls. Tom says, now it might be flooded. He tries starting it, but nothing. Tom says, good try, and Andy gets out. Tom tells him the problem with motorcycles is if you’re not riding them regularly, the battery dies and the engine isn’t warmed up. Sorry. Andy shrugs, and Tom pushes it back to the studio, saying, it’s so annoying.

Andy says, the cast accomplished a lot this year, but only one of them established their own holiday – Stassi’s Outfit of the Day. He asks how you buy a holiday, and Stassi says there’s an organization you apply to. You need to have a mission and a website, and submit it to them. She says, it’s not just about fashion, but feeling good about yourself. If you take extra time to put on an awesome outfit, you feel good. Andy points out that Lisa responded on Twitter by saying there’s an LVP Day on March 1st. He asks how Lisa celebrated, and she says she missed it; she was working.

Andy asks Katie if it isn’t being hypocritical to says James attacked her when she screamed at Lala. Katie says, that was over two years ago. He says she called Lala a whore, and she says that was girl on girl time. It wasn’t okay, but anyone who knows her, knows she has a sharp tongue. Lisa says she’s Katie’s biggest cheerleader, but thinks sometimes it’s Katie’s tonality. She needs a lesson on how to handle situations. Lisa adds that she doesn’t like ultimatums. Katie says she let things roll off for years, but James kept doing it, and she thought no more. At the end of the day, she doesn’t regret it. Schwartz says, she’s the ambassador of karma. James has done horrible things, but he’s apologized. Stassi says, he apologizes, but then does the same thing the next day. Tom tells James not to apologize, which comes out wrong, so Ariana translates, saying, if you don’t give a flying, don’t apologize because it means nothing. Andy asks if James has a grudge against Katie. He says he never had a grudge; he just doesn’t like her. Katie says, why? She’s the first person who’s making him be accountable. Everyone else lets him get away with it. Andy says Schwartz didn’t seem upset about the fat comment. Schwartz says he wasn’t happy, but thought she’d take it in stride, and just tell James to eff off. Katie says she did that for three years. She hears about her body now on social media, and it’s people like him who make her ashamed to be in her own body. James claims she said he was anorexic, but Katie denies saying that. I don’t remember, but if she did, I’m sure it was in response to one of his many fat comments. Tom says, Katie called Lala a whore, and waited two years to apologize. He calls her a hypocrite, and she says they all are. He says he’s not trying to get someone fired because they say he’s dumb. Andy says she called him out on how he spoke to women, and she got called out as a villain. Katie thinks they missed the point. It takes courage to stand up even if you make enemies. She’s proud of what she did, and thought it was noble. She’d never had the guts, and it felt good. She has no regrets. She’s modest too.

Brunchmaster General and SUR hostess Billie joins them. She’s completed her final surgery, and Billie says her body is now the way she always imagined it. Andy asks how her dating world is going, and she says it’s hard for a trans woman, but she’s putting out good vibes. She wants to have a baby, but will probably adopt soon. Andy asks if she had a little thing with Max, and we see a clip of Billie telling Lisa that she might be sleeping with her son. Lisa says Ken asked why Max stopped hooking up with her, and Max said, she’s a pretty girl. What’s the big deal? Billie says it was one drunken night, and they’re friends. Andy asks about Katie not inviting Billie to Girl’s Night, and Katie says they were just executing the process quickly; she wasn’t specifically not inviting anyone. Andy says she posted a note on Instagram, and tagged some of the women. Katie says that was just an oversight. Billie was upset, and took it as transphobic. We see Billie’s tweet about them leaving out the trans girl. Billie says she never said that word, pissing me off all over again because you can convey an idea without using the specific word. She says she liked a bunch of comments where people were upset with their workplace. Lisa says it’s upsetting, considering all the years she’s worked with the LGBTQ community. Billie thinks people aren’t aware, and Lisa says she’s been nothing but supportive. None of them have been anything but supportive. It was an oversight. She asks if Billie would label them as supportive, and Billie admits they have been. Andy asks for Stassi’s reaction, and Stassi says it was upsetting with Billie telling them to get their heads out of their asses. Ariana says, it’s not Katie’s fault, and Billie tells her she never said it was. Katie says she’s sorry Billie got left out of the post, but she has a life. Is she supposed to try and think of everyone who might be offended? Billie wishes America would do that. Nice try. She realized how stupid she’s sounding, and tried backtrack, and make a political statement out of it. I really wanted to like Billie, but I think her insecurities get the better of her. And I have to keep remembering, even though these people are adults, they don’t behave like adults. Andy ask how Girl’s Night compares to James’s See You Next Tuesday, and Katie thinks it’s much better. James says there’s never been a party like his that sold out, and he’s done sixty-seven of them. He tells Katie, see you next Tuesday.

Moving back to Lala. Andy says she’s gone from zero to one hundred a few times. We flash back to that. He asks why she has a hard having a conversation with someone who disagrees with her without yelling. She says it’s exhausting to school people on life. It’s a waste of time. Ariana feels Lala isn’t who she seems. She’s handling things poorly, but she’s gone through so much. Andy asks if Ariana still thinks Lala should toughen up. We flash back to Ariana saying that Lala is fragile right now, but she needs to toughen up. Ariana thinks she was looking at it from her own experience with the group. She went through the same thing and got no consolation. She was actively made fun of; Jax told her that she can’t play the dad card. Lala wonders why this group is numb to death. Schwartz says he was supportive, and Ariana thanks him. She says, even though it’s professional, it’s a volatile work environment. Maybe at that time, it wasn’t the best time for Lala to be working. Andy asks why Billie called Lala the Donald Trump of SUR, and she says Lala projects non-stop, and says mean things to people. Stassi says, James 2.0. Andy says Lisa didn’t totally believe what James said happened at the brunch with Lala screaming at Raquel and Billie. How did she feel watching it back? Lala says she’d do it again, and Lisa says she almost headbutted Raquel. That’s no way to behave. Lala says Raquel keeps coming to her when it’s feeding time in the lion’s den and doesn’t expect to get feasted on. Billie says she doesn’t know if Lala is on something, but she scares some people. Lala says, no blood was drawn, and Billie asks if blood has to be drawn for it to be aggressive. On that note, it’s time for Billie to leave the magic circle.

Andy tells us that Ariana and Tom have a big announcement. Ariana says she’s pregnant. Eight months; it’s super small. Tom explains they got a house. They’re just celebrating one month of living there. We see clips of them in their new place. Katie and Schwartz also have a house nearby. Katie says Schwartz couldn’t be away from Tom. Jax and Brittany are also joining the pack, as well as Kristen. Lisa is happy to see them progress. Andy says her kids are all growing up, and Lisa says they’re also making the right choices. Andy says it’s no coincidence that they got houses in the same neighborhood. They can all start having babies, Kaka says, baby time, and Schwartz says they’ll knock a few out. Brittany says they have plenty of room. She can’t wait to be a mama. As soon as it feels right, it’s going to happen. Andy says Ariana threatened to walk out if anyone asked her about having kids. She says people at events or on the carpet think it’s cute to ask Tom what his plans are after TomTom, but say she must be thinking about babies. Tom sees why she gets annoyed. Ariana says, if it changes, she’ll let them know.

Andy says Lala seems to go back and forth about being sober or drinking heavily. He asks what her relationship with alcohol is, and she says she loves it, but it’s abusive. Andy asks if something happened to cause her to get help. She says there were a lot of moments in her life that were alcohol driven, but she took a trip to Disneyworld with her and Rand’s families. She was drunk the entire time. In the plane on the way home, she was face-chugging from a bottle. The next morning, she decided she didn’t want to live this way again, and reached out to get help. She says she got sober on October 22nd, and never wants to drink again. Everyone applauds.

Andy asks Lisa why she thinks James is unable to follow her advice not to drink. She says, he’s his own worst enemy. Andy asks if he’s back to partying, and he says he’s been DJing and working a lot, but he’s not sober. Lisa says, he’s not always honest. James asks what they want him to say. Tom says it’s worse when he mixes alcohol with other things. James says he smokes weed, but Tom is talking about uppers. Good Lord, I haven’t heard anyone use that word in decades. I swear this group uses a 70s dictionary to communicate. Tom says that’s James’s kryptonite. James acts like he doesn’t know what Tom is talking about, and tells him to shut his mouth. Lisa tells him not to speak to Tom that way. He’s the one person who’s been on James’s side and has his back. Andy asks why James is angry today, but James insists he’s not. Lisa thinks he had a drink at lunch. Katie says, this is normal. James says he has eight people screaming at him. Okay, now it’s eight. One, two, three…. Kristen says he built the house, now he has to live in it. Stassi wonders why they should feel bad for him. James tells Stassi to stop playing with her ugly extensions, and everyone is like, see what we mean? Andy thinks they look great, but James says they’ll see what Twitter has to say. Lala doesn’t think James should say anything about that after his girlfriend came out wearing polyester. We see a clip of Raquel in that terrible dress.

Andy says James said sometimes he needs a drink to make him feel like himself. James says he gets social anxiety, and feels the need to be on. People want meet him a lot, and it gets hard. He feels like after a whiskey or two, he’s on. Andy asks if he’s still helping his family, and he says, of course, but he doesn’t want to go into detail. Kristen says he wants to act like he’s the only one who helps his family. Andy wonders why Kristen is chiming in, and Lisa tells him, that’s what she meant. James says he’s sorry he’s not so sparky today. Stassi is curious as to why the show focused on James helping his family, when every person there helps out their family. She thinks it’s unfair. Tom asks if Stassi helps her parents pay their rent, but Stassi doesn’t want to go into it. Why embarrass their families? Andy says, it’s compelling to watch. Schwartz admires that James helps his family, but Katie says he uses it as justification for his behavior. Lisa doesn’t think he does. Jax tries to say something nice, and James tells him, STFU. He says he was giving James a complement. Stassi says James won’t stop talking about how hates them. Andy asks how Lisa felt when she was called a mother figure by James’s mother. Answering a different question, she says, the perception of James would be 100% negative if they weren’t showing the other side. It’s very important to see his compassion, and him supporting his family. Katie says she’s been going through a helluva ride, battling depression for years, and James’s parents got divorced. Poor thing. Give her a break. Lisa says, it’s not quite like that. Kristen says half of their parents are divorced, and Lisa says, it’s not a competition. James asks if they’re kidding him, and Kristen says he was raised by effing a-holes. Lisa thinks that’s going too far, but Brittany says he called her family hillbillies. James walks off, saying he can’t listen to sh*t about his family, and have them not expect him to rip someone’s head off.

Next time, Beau joins the group, Lisa says both Jax and Ken are dirty dogs, and Kristen says she’s doing it on her own, but Katie says she’s still with Carter.

🐲 It’s late, and I’m behind. Long story about Mother’s Day flowers that weren’t delivered (do not use JustFlowers – I repeat, do not use JustFlowers), and took up an enormous part of my day. So even though you probably know by now, it was dracarys all over the place, I’ll throw in my two cents on Game of Thrones tomorrow.

🏰 In the Meantime…

Enjoy these retro reactions to The Red Wedding.


May 8, 2019 – Willow Lets Brad Have It, a Housewives Halloween, Throne Removal & a Skater’s Story


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Carly knows Jax loves Josslyn enough to rise above any differences he has with Sonny. She’s thanking him in advance. He says he just cares about their daughter’s happiness. Josslyn comes downstairs, and Jax hugs her.

Drew snoozes on the couch. Kim puts a blanket on him, and startles him awake.

Chase asks if Willow wants dessert. She didn’t take him for a sweets guy, but he says he’s an anything guy if it will cheer her up. She says she’s fine, and he says she’s amazing. She stepped up, shared her story, and got Kristina out from under Shiloh’s influence. Willow says it doesn’t mean it’s over for Kristina any more than it’s over for her.

Sonny tells Kristina she can always rent a room at his place, but Alexis says her room is ready and waiting. Sonny says he’s just giving her an option. Neil says, Kristina’s future is wide open. Alexis suggests pizza, since she has nothing in the house. Kristina asks if Alexis didn’t think she was ready to see the light. She was blind, but now she sees. She wonders if Sam will see the real truth about Shiloh.

Shiloh tells Sam that it’s time for the next step. Downstairs, Jason kicks in the door, and takes out his gun. Shiloh tells Sam, the pain will soon pass. Jason bust in, and whacks Shiloh in the back of the head. Shiloh falls over, unconscious, and Jason tells Sam, it’s over.

Kristina says Sam wasn’t part of the intervention, and thinks Sam would have sided with her. She might have even told Shiloh where Kristina was. Sonny says, Sam’s a wild card, and Alexis says, she’s rather close to Shiloh. Kristina says, Shiloh has a particular interest in Sam; even more than he did in her. Neil tells her, don’t try to get in Shiloh’s head. Kristina says, and focus on hers. Neil says they’re focusing on her tonight, and Sonny promises to look into it.

Valerie sits in Charlie’s with Brad and Lucas, and holds Wiley. She says she hasn’t seen them in ages, and Lucas says since she’s become a crime fighter, she hasn’t been available much. She says Lucas is always working, and Brad is always running off someplace or other. Lucas agrees, and Brad asks if Lucas doesn’t appreciate his interest in self-improvement. Lucas says it doesn’t come cheap. He’s pumped a lot of money into DOD. Valerie says, Brad is involved with DOD? and Brad says he’s been taking classes. Valerie tells him to stop. He doesn’t want anything to do with those people.

Kim apologizes for waking Drew, but he says he’s glad he woke up. He’s been slacking. Kim asks if he wants her to put him to work. She has to sort through a box of Oscar’s stuff, and thought he might want something for himself and something for Scout. He picks up a handmade ceramic, and says, salsa bowl? She says, ashtray, and she’s never smoked. She takes out a telescope, and Drew says it looks like it’s been used. She says before it was Oscar’s, it was hers, and before it was hers, it was his.

Jax tells Josslyn it’s good to see her. Josslyn says she missed him. She and Oscar were together constantly, and now he’s gone. Jax asks if she wants to tell him about it. She asks what he wants to know, and he says, everything. He has all the time in the world.

Chase knows Willow is still worried that Shiloh will find out about the baby, but he has no reason to suspect anything. Willow says, that’s what she thought. Then her mother came looking for her. Chase ask if she’s still a part of DOD, and Willow says, forever Shiloh’s number one fan. Her mother knew she was pregnant. She never told him, because she still thinks Willow will return – with coercion. Chase ask if she thinks her mother will say anything, but she doubts it. Her mother was jealous when Shiloh started paying attention to her. She couldn’t stop him, so she pushed Willow toward him, trying please him. How sick is that? Chase is sorry. She says the silver lining is that her mother would never want Shiloh to know something that would bind him to her; certainly not a baby, but to be safe she said she had a miscarriage.

Valerie tells Brad that what she and her partner discovered was disgusting. Sometimes DOD uses sex as coercion to keep members there. Brad tells Lucas, oh, he forgot. Shiloh’s been hitting on him. He says Lucas can’t be taking this seriously. Lucas says, the police are. Brad says, are they? Valerie says there isn’t an official investigation, but her partner has a first person account about unwanted advances. Lucas says he knew something was weird, but Brad says DOD does a lot of good. Valerie agrees they do great community outreach, but it’s eclipsed by what else is going on. Brad says she wouldn’t want to tarnish her hard-earned detective credentials for a disgruntled former member. She tells him that she’s just looking out for him and his family, and to watch his back. She leaves.

Jason helps Sam up. He says, Kristina had a breakthrough. She’s done with DOD and Shiloh. She show him where Shiloh started the tattoo, and asks how bad it is. He says she’s bleeding. She tells him to get Kristina’s Pledge in the record’s room, but he says, it’s not worth the risk. She tells him, go get it, and smashes a vase against the door, yelling, get out! When Jason is safely gone, she rouses Shiloh.

Valerie finds Chase, and says it turns out she has family in DOD. He asks, who? and says she can trust Willow. She says her cousin Lucas’s husband Brad. He won’t hear a bad word about DOD or Shiloh. They have to get the DA’s attention, and shut Shiloh down. Chase says they might have a witness. Kristina just left DOD.

Kim tells Drew that they could see every star. It must have gotten mixed up in her things, and by the time she discovered it, he was deployed. He should have it. She’s sorry; she forgot she had it. Drew says that reminds him. He shows her the picture he took out of Oscar’s book; the three of them after Oscar got the Ashbery Award. Drew says Oscar says it’s when Oscar was living in the DOD house. He guesses even though Oscar was furious with them, he wanted them near him.

The doorbell rings, and Drew goes to answer. It’s Curtis, who says he knows Drew has a lot going on. Drew says he’s fine, and they hug.

Josslyn tells Jax that Oscar’s parents were great. He says they knew she was a comfort to Oscar, and she says, she tried to be, but it’s not like they could have a real conversation most of the time. Jax says the medication does that, and Josslyn asks if that’s what happened to grandma. He says, yes. He would sit there, and she would just go on as if the nurses, IV, and hospital bed were normal. She would say, now, Jasper, don’t go off surfing and let my garden go to seed. Carly says, Lady Jane was one of a kind. Jax says she seemed like herself until then. Occasionally, she asked for his grandfather, who was gone by then, saying, if comes home drunk, there will be hell to pay. Jax says she never uttered a cross word unless she was really mad, and Josslyn asks what he would tell her when that happened. He says he would say, don’t worry. He has Jerry, so go back to sleep. Josslyn says he even knew what to say. She cries a little, and puts her head on the table.

Josslyn tells Jax that Oscar liked The Wind in the Willows. After all his time in the hospital, the beautiful, green English countryside sounded nice to him. They almost finished it. She’s sorry; she already said that. She was reading, and fell asleep, just for a minute, and when she opened her eyes, he was just lying there smiling. But he was so still. She didn’t want it to be true, but she knew. Jax promises that Oscar felt her love. He feels it now.

Chase says he’ll take Willow home, but she says hearing about Valerie’s cousin, she thinks DOD is everywhere. She doesn’t want to be alone. He suggests she come home with him, and she thanks him for being patient. She’s sorry she’s a basket case. He says she survived DOD, she protected her child, and reached out to help Kristina. That takes courage and strength. She needs to stop selling herself short.

Brad tells Lucas that he’s never seen anything sketchy. Lucas says he parrots everything Shiloh says, forks over money, and defends Shiloh blindly. Brad says he’s defending the guy who helped him. He’s been sleeping better, his anxiety is under control, and he’s stopped obsessing that they’ll lose Wiley. Lucas says he does seem calmer, and Brad asks, then what’s the problem. Willow approaches their table, and tells Brad not to let Wiley anywhere near Shiloh.

Sonny tells Kristina that he’s proud of her, and loves her very much. He’ll see her tomorrow. Kristina says she’ll try not to do anything crazy before then. Alexis walks Sonny out, and Kristina says, now would be a good time for a drink. Neil isn’t carrying, is he? Outside, Sonny offers to post guards just in case Kristina bolts, but Alexis says they have to trust her. She didn’t leave, and there will be more temptation without a locked door, but they’ll have to deal with it. Alexis doesn’t want her feeling like a prisoner.

Jason goes to the records room, unlocking the door with what looks like a crochet hook.

Shiloh says, his head, and Sam says he got hit pretty good. He asks, what happened? and she says, what does he remember? She should tell him that he had a seizure and freak him out. He says he started her initiation, and the next thing he knew, he was on the floor, and he heard a smash. He thinks Jason is the only person who would go so far to stop Sam’s progress. Sam says, he’s certainly capable, but if he comes after Shiloh, he won’t miss. A guy came in, ranting and raving about something Shiloh did to his kid. She threw a vase at him, and he ran. She would have gone after him, but didn’t want to leave Shiloh. She says they should probably call the police, but Shiloh says, no police. She asks, why? and he says, this place is a sanctuary to many. He doesn’t want the police turning it upside down. They’ll have to turn the other cheek, and go on with their lives. He suggests they finish what they started.

Neil tells Kristina that he doesn’t have any booze on him, but if he knows her mom, she’s probably got coffee. She says, since he mentioned it, how well do he and her mom know each other. Alexis comes back in, and says Kristina has a visitor. Valerie walks in, and Neil wants to talk to Alexis outside. Valerie says Kristina called her, and Kristina says she can explain. Valerie says she doesn’t have to. She’s just glad Kristina is okay. She’s curious about one thing though. Does Alexis have her number in her phone? How did Kristina reach her? Kristina says she committed Valerie’s number to memory a while ago. Valerie didn’t know people still did that, since they have no brains anymore, only phones. Okay, I added that last part. Kristina says, she does with the people she’s glad to have in her life. Valerie says, good policy. Kristina knows they have a lot to talk about, but Valerie says it can wait until they have time. She’s sorry she came by so late, but she wanted to see for herself that Kristina was okay. Kristina says okay might be a stretch, but she’s getting there. Valerie says anything she can do to help, Kristina has her number. Kristina says there is one thing Valerie can do.

Willow says she told Brad to stay away from DOD. If he doesn’t believe her, believe Chase. Letting Wiley near Shiloh is bordering on abuse. Lucas says how they parent is none of her business, and she says they’re no parents at all if they trust Shiloh. Wiley deserves better. Lucas says she doesn’t know what’s best for their son, and tells her, stay away.

Curtis hugs Kim. He’s sorry about Oscar. He was a great kid. Kim says, he was. She says she’s going to get sorting through this, and takes the box. Drew says it’s good to see him. Curtis asks if Drew wants to talk. Drew says Jordan is in crisis because of him. Curtis says they went over this, and it’s not Drew’s fault. Drew says he was behind wheel, and asks how Jordan is. Curtis says she had a setback, but she’s been bumped up on the transplant list. All they need is a donor, and they may have one.

Jax thinks maybe Josslyn should go back to bed, but she says she can’t really sleep. She keeps dreaming of Oscar, and wakes up thinking he’s still there. Jax says, he is, in her heart. She says she wants him there too, and Jax says she’ll never really lose him. Lady Jane is still with them. She’s there every time he hears the song she sang him to sleep with when he was a kid. Josslyn says, Lavender’s Blue. Jax starts to sing, and she joins in with him.

Sam says she’s worried about Shiloh. He took quote a hit. He says once the ceremony has started, it can’t be stopped. He stumbles a little, and Sam says it will have to wait. She helps him to the couch.

Valerie asks Kristina what she needs, and Kristina says, advice; the legal kind. Valerie wonders why she can’t ask her mom, but she says she’d rather ask a friend. Say she gave something to an individual for safe-keeping; a proof of wrongdoing by someone close. She wants it back, but the individual won’t hand it over. Valeria, is there a threat if she doesn’t comply? but Kristina says, it hasn’t gone that far. What should she do under the circumstances? Valerie says, report it. It sounds like blackmail

Neil remarks that there are a lot of stars, and Alexis says there were a lot more at her other house on the lake. He asks why she gave it up, and she says, orange carpeting – and it burned down. She’s worried her daughter will bolt back to Shiloh if she says the wrong thing. He says, impressive, and she says, what is? He says her ability to assume guilt for imagined events. The debate about the origins of guilt says it might have been developed to foster relationships; so that when people lived in close quarters, they didn’t kill each other. He thinks it’s so we learn from our mistakes. Why do something to someone you love twice, if you feel horrible. She says, it keeps happening, and he asks what she gets out of it. She says they’re used to it. Lots of feelings are inconvenient or confusing; she can live with this one. He thinks she can do without it. What say she give it a try? She looks at the stars.

At Chase’s apartment, Willow asks Chase, what was he saying about her strength? He says she looked pretty tough giving Brad and Lucas a piece of her mind. He gets it. She’s watching them do what she tried avoid. It’s personal for her.

Curtis tells Drew that they’re waiting for confirmation that the donor is suitable. Drew says he needs good news, especially today. Curtis says he’s there to spread some love. Drew says he’s closing a big deal, and will have an influx of capital soon. He feels responsible, and wants to cover the medical bills. He says, there’s less good in the world today than there was yesterday. He’s filling the hole. Do him a favor.

Sonny finds Jax in the living room, and asks when he got in. Jax says, this afternoon; he came straight there. Sonny asks if Jax wants a scotch, and Jax says, sure. Sonny asks if there were any problems on the trip. Jax says there were some extra questions at customs, but nothing his new green card couldn’t fix. He hears congratulations are in order; another baby. They clink glasses. Sonny says Josslyn needs him there. She’s gone through a lot, and is incredibly brave. Jax says she is. Carly comes downstairs, and Jax asks how Josslyn is doing. Carly says, she’s fast asleep. The lullaby worked. She asks if Jax and Sonny are getting along okay, and Sonny says, peachy.

Sonny tells Carly, they’re great, and Jax says they’re catching up. He should probably go. He needs to check in. Carly says they’re getting his suite ready. He says it won’t be for long. Lucy is going to show him some properties. Sonny says, to rent? and Jax says, to buy. Kate’s (aka Connie) old place is for sale. Maybe they’ll be neighbors. Sonny says, that would be great, and Jax leaves. Carly looks at Sonny.

Sam sits Shiloh down. He says he’s okay, but she tells him let her get ice. He says the others will be back from Beecher’s Corners soon. He doesn’t want to inconvenience her. She says, it’s no trouble, and he thanks her. She saved his life. She thanks him, saying, he and DOD save her life every day.

Curtis says what Drew is offering means everything, but he and Jordan aren’t there yet. When they are, he promises he’ll call Drew. On one condition, that Drew promises to call Curtis if he needs him. Drew nods.

Kim calls Shiloh. She wonders if they can meet. She’d like to talk to him about her son. He says his door is always open to her. Sam comes back with ice, and puts it on his head. Shiloh says this isn’t how he envisioned the day, and she says her neither. He hopes she’s not too disappointed, and promises to finish what they started.

Lucas tells Brad, it’s bizarre. Brad would never do anything to jeopardize Wiley; he’d do anything for Wiley. He asks Brad to tell him the truth. Why is she so worried about DOD? Brad doesn’t know. He tells Lucas that he doesn’t feel so good, and excuses himself. Lucas shrugs at Wiley, and makes a call. He says he needs to have a conversation about him and his family.

Chase says Willow doesn’t have to say anything she doesn’t want to. Her secrets are her own. He wants to be there if he can, and needs to say something. He tells her to chime in if she wants or tell him to shut up. He says there are other kids running around DOD, and she cares for them like anyone else, but she hasn’t sought out their parents like did with Brad. Is protecting Wiley from Shiloh important because he’s the same age as her kid, or is or is Wiley especially vulnerable? Willow says he knows why. Wiley is her son.

Alexis says Neil is supposed to be working for her daughter, not her. He says, it’s May. He has a two for one special. He tells her, rest up. They start work again tomorrow.

Valerie tells Kristina, the only way to disarm a blackmailer is to accept the information will see the light of day. It will hurt people, but she doesn’t want Kristina hurting. She doesn’t have to go it alone. She reached out once before, don’t be afraid do it again.

Sonny picks up the phone, and says he’s buying Connie’s house. Carly says, because of Jax? It will be good for Josslyn if he moves there, and the rest of them will just have to deal with it. Jason comes in, and says he was too late. Shiloh replaced the Pledges with blanks. He took everything home, and there was nothing but blank paper in the folders. Carly wonders how he knew, and Jason says he probably removed any incriminating evidence after they had the cup tested. Carly says they’re back to square one, but Sonny says, Shiloh was only safe when Kristina was around. Now Shiloh doesn’t have her anymore.

Tomorrow, Anna tells Robert to leave Alex’s past alone, Lucas confronts Julian, and Jason tells Sam that she’s off the hook.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Everyone needs therapy. The end.

Halloween Night. LuAnn meets with makeup artist Mary. In her interview, she says it’s not just any Halloween party. The venue is tricked out to be a hospital, and everyone will feel like they entered an asylum.

Dorinda gets her sequins ready. I’m not sure what she’s supposed to be.

Sonja is waiting on her nurse’s outfit. She can’t wait to see Bethenny. If she has garters on, Sonja is drinking and sucking Bethenny’s face off.

Online, Bethenny sees her sexy angel costume on someone twenty years younger. Her makeup guy says all of the Kardashians were angels this year.

Tinsley says she hasn’t been a sexy, slutty nurse in a while.

Luann tells Mary that her backup singers are hot. In her interview, she says since started doing the cabaret, her appearances are stepping up. She’s shooting for nurse gone Madonna.

Barbara shows up as Slash. Sonja doesn’t know who Slash is, but says she definitely looks like him.

Bethenny arrives, along with her gigantic wings. She’s the first one there of the group, and dances with LuAnn’s music director. In her interview, she says LuAnn sent out a group text, saying she knows they don’t want to be out late, so she’ll be performing at eleven. Bethenny is waiving her school night rule. She can’t imagine being sober there, and the music director says LuAnn is reckless. In Bethenny’s interview, she says it’s a testament to LuAnn’s her sobriety to be in this kind of environment this soon. It’s where alcohol was born to live. John follows Dorinda’s sequins in as Death. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she had to put John’s tongue back in his mouth and sew it up when he saw Bethenny. Sonja urges LuAnn to hurry. Dorinda is shocked because she didn’t recognize Barbara. She tells Bethenny that she has her date for the night. The costumes are amazing, and this reminds me of NYC Halloween parties past that I attended. We won’t speak of that time…

Mary tells LuAnn, the makeup will be different from cabaret. I would hope so. Ramona is a no-show, and in her interview, Sonja says Ramona doesn’t fool her. She’s at Omar’s, social climbing. Dorinda says she’d rather be at Omar’s. In Bethenny’s interview, she thinks it’s weird that LuAnn didn’t come out to say hi. John says big stars make people wait, and thinks it’s too much. Sonja wonders why LuAnn didn’t say hello, and Tinsley says she has to rehearse.

At 11:30, Bethenny says she has to go in four minutes. Sonja says LuAnn did hair and makeup for three hours at the hotel. LuAnn is ready to roll, but Bethenny has to leave.

Everyone cheers when LuAnn hits the stage. In Dorinda’s interview, she says it’s fascinating how the energy increases when LuAnn comes out to sing her two songs. At the end of Money Can’t Buy You Class, confetti explodes. In her interview, LuAnn says she’s no J Lo, but thinks she did okay. Tinsley says she had several drinks, danced her face off, saw LuAnn, and now it’s time to go. LuAnn is miffed that Bethenny left, and Dorinda tells her that Ramona never showed up. In LuAnn’s interview, she can’t understand why Bethenny had to get home to her daughter. Is Bethenny going to watch her sleep? Um, no. She has to relieve the babysitter, you self-centered jerk.

The next morning, Dale works on a needlepoint stocking, while Tinsley makes coffee. Dale says, it’s yoga for the mind. She tells Tinsley how much she loved watching her in the circus. It was like the dance recitals she never had. Tinsley shows her mother mug shot coasters she’s had made. She gave some to LuAnn, but it didn’t go over well. We see a clip of that, and LuAnn saying Tinsley’s sense of humor sucks. Tinsley tells Dale that she was emotional about the circus, and it hit her that her dad would have loved it. It hit her about Scott too, and she lost it. It surprised Dale, who thought she’d be on a high. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she’s acting like everything is okay, and she’s relieved about the break-up, but it was the opposite. Although, if she was going to lose it, she might as well do it looking like a clown. Dale says it would have been nice to have a boyfriend to share it with. Tinsley says all the things she’s not getting were there, but she’s not in a position to have a family. Dale says Scott made her believe he and Tinsley were on the same page. Tinsley says she knows what she wants, but doesn’t want to have a kid without a husband. In her interview, she says she hasn’t given up on her dream; someone to share her child with other than her mother. It’s not normal. She tells Dale that she needs to get her mind off of it. She wants to do some volunteer work, and hopefully attract a man who wants to be around that. Dale says Sonja claims Tinsley is going to have men chasing her.

Ramona, Sonja, and Dorinda meet some other women at a restaurant, including speed skater Bridie Farrell, who’s CEO of New York Loves Kids. Ramona explains that it’s a charity focused on sexually abused kids. Bridie says when she was thirteen, another skater moved to town, and abused her. She never said anything, but eventually shared the story many years later. The next day, he admitted it, but because of the statute of limitations, she can’t touch him. Ramona says if she talks about it, maybe other kids will come forward, although I think she probably knows that. In Ramona’s interview, she says she’s passionate about changing the statute of limitations, since children aren’t likely to come forward. It takes maybe ten years. She tells Bridie that she’s going to make it happen. She wants more recognition for the charity, and to make it grow. She keeps calling Bridie Birdie, and in her interview, Sonja says, get her name right, Romina. Ramona suggests $200 a person, and Sonja says Birdie can exploit them, adding she does children too. Which is probably not the best choice of words under the circumstances. Sonja says they might not be the most eloquent, but they’re passionate.

John comes by Dorinda’s new place with a giant paperwhite housewarming gift. In her interview, Dorinda says she hasn’t brought anyone to the apartment yet. She didn’t want anyone’s opinion, and wanted it to be hers. It’s the first thing in twenty-five years that’s all hers. She tells John about how she’s placing the furniture. John says since it’s three bedrooms, he guesses they must be starting a family. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, marriage is for the young. At her age, she doesn’t even want to take care of a plant. Both of their personalities wouldn’t fit in one apartment. She’s gotten very independent, and maybe in the long run, it won’t work for John. She tells him that she slept horribly last night, and he says that’s because he wasn’t there. He’s shipping his clothes there, and getting his own closet and sink. It’s a new chapter. Dorinda says she’s just going to make it hers.

As usual, Bethenny is the first to arrive for lunch with Dorinda, Tinsley, and Sonja. Dorinda and Tinsley come in next, and Bethenny asks if Dorinda loves her place. Dorinda says she wants it to be about her. She’s not doing anything for anyone else. In her interview, Dorinda says she’s not being a bitch, but she will be if someone wants to stay there. Sonja finally joins them. Oooh! A seafood tower is served. Bethenny says LuAnn texted that she heard Bethenny’s costume was over-the-top. LuAnn was in blackface with an afro last year. We flash back to that. Tinsley thinks it’s a bit of a dig. I’m not so sure about that. It could be an insult, but it can also be referring to the wow factor. Lady Gaga is often over-the-top, and it’s in a good way. Most of the time. Bethenny says when LuAnn is being the Countess, she takes an insult, and wraps it in a bow. We flash back to quite a few of those, going back to 2008. Dorinda says she told LuAnn that Bethenny left after her performance, and LuAnn asked if Bethenny was going to watch her daughter sleep. Bethenny asks if LuAnn left her kids alone to go out nightclubs when they were little. Why is LuAnn making digs at her? We flash back to the fish room incident. Dorinda it’s all about what’s happening with LuAnn. It’s all cabaret. With the Countess, it’s a one-sided deal right now. In Dorinda’s interview, she says for some reason, LuAnn is being snarky with Bethenny, when Bethenny has been her advocate. It seems self-destructive. Bethenny thinks LuAnn has delusions of grandeur, and Sonja says, she’s surrounded by groupies who fan the fire. Bethenny says her temperature is rising. She’ll be there for the next intervention.

Dorinda goes back to her old apartment because she still has stuff there. She says she hasn’t seen it empty since 2001, when she bought it. She only moved back because life changed drastically, and not for the good. Hannah arrives, and thinks it’s weird. In her interview, Dorinda says she hasn’t sold it yet. She might rent it, and then maybe Hannah and whoever can move in and have a baby. She brings out a Halloween scarecrow. Hannah wonders, of all things, why it’s there, and Dorinda says decorations were 70% off. It’s for next year. Hannah says Dorinda can’t put all of her money in decorations. Dorinda says they had bad times there, but good times too. Hannah says she hated the place. Well, there goes that baby idea. She says when she was younger, it was a different place. She didn’t want to move forward. She came there and stopped, and felt like she kind of died. She says she was so scared. In Dorinda’s interview, she says they didn’t move back because they were happy. Richard had died, and they did things that maybe they shouldn’t have, like drinking and avoidance. They did a lot of grieving in that apartment. It housed them, but it wasn’t the best of times. Hannah says now she feels like an entirely different person. When they lived there, they were on top of each other, and fighting all the time. Dorinda says, it became a prison, and they didn’t know how to get out. They were surviving. Hannah says she sometimes feels that it was of their own making. Dorinda says someone they loved very much died. Hannah doesn’t want to talk about it. In her interview, Dorinda says, it’s time to let go, and start fresh. In six months, this move will be the beginning of wonderful things. Dorinda is sorry it evokes sad feelings, but Hannah says it evokes happy memories too. They’ve come so far.

At Bridie’s fundraiser, Ramona tells Bridie that the set-up is stunning. In her interview, Ramona says she’s glad she spearheaded the event. She started with getting the location, and did all of the work. She’s proud.

Sitting in traffic, Albi tells Bethenny that they won’t get to the red carpet until 7:30. She’s supposed to go to a Victoria’s Secret fashion show that she was invited to first, and doesn’t think she can make both that and Ramona’s fundraiser. She’s wearing a revealing black rubber dress, and says, it’s a charity event. Imagine walking in like this. She knows she’s going to catch hell.

The fundraiser starts. In Sonja’s interview, she says Dorinda looks amazing. When you move, you always find things in the back of your closet. Dorinda is skinny now, so she can wear her skinny clothes. Ramona says she got a text from Bethenny telling her happy birthday, and they had a nice exchange, but now she’s not coming. LuAnn comes in, and Ramona gripes that she asked Bethenny to come by for just thirty minutes, and she can’t. She isn’t mad; it makes her sad. LuAnn says Bethenny didn’t stay at the Halloween party. Even though she was there for three hours. She thought Bethenny could stay at least ten more minutes. Sonja says Ramona didn’t even come. Since it’s always good to start the evening with complaints, Dorinda wishes LuAnn had said hi, but LuAnn says she was getting dressed. In Sonja’s interview, she says LuAnn should do what every diva does. Say you were looking for them, and couldn’t find them. Don’t be defensive. She was expected to kiss their rings. They’re divas too.

Harry Dubin shows up. LuAnn says, their favorite person. Ramona jets over to him. In Sonja’s interview, she says she doesn’t want to talk to him, and Ramona invited him. Does Ramona want him? Sonja says Harry loves her, but he’s an itch she can’t scratch. We flash back to Harry giving her a ring, and then him going off with LuAnn. Sonja says Ramona ditched them for Harry, and Ramona says she loves Harry. Sonja says she’s doing it in general. She left the circus early for a date, and didn’t show for the Halloween party. In her interview, Ramona says there are only 24 hours in a day. How is she supposed to meet a guy if she’s hanging out with them? She double-books. LuAnn asks if Sonja is excited about visiting her place upstate. In her interview, LuAnn says she can’t wait for the girls to visit. Ramona tells her to feel free to celebrate both her and Bethenny’s birthdays. Which I’m sure means just hers. She says her friends are taking her out on her actual birthday. LuAnn asks if they’re invited, and Ramona says, no. She says her friend Lucia is hosting it. Sonja says she knows Lucia. We see a clip of Lucia says she’d like to invite Sonja if there’s space, and Ramona saying there isn’t. 😮 LuAnn says, so she’s also supposed to celebrate upstate? Ramona says she likes lots of birthday parties. They can all have one for her. In her interview, Sonja says she can’t believe Ramona has the balls to say they’re not invited. She’s not throwing Ramona a party. Dorinda thinks it’s bullsh*t. I’m just… I don’t even know. Who does that? Even though I’ve been watching her for years, it’s always a revelation to discover how self-centered Ramona can be.

In Ramona’s interview, she says she had nothing to do with the list. They invited the people, not her. We again see Lucia asking to add Sonja, and Ramona nixing that idea. Wow. Just wow. She says she has lots of friends, and everyone can’t be invited. I’m hoping lots of those friends see this, and she has a lot less friends after it airs. Sonja asks if Ramona is on a social climbing thing. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, birthdays are for ten-year-olds. You get them a Barbie or some other toy, not give them a hundred bucks toward a new Chanel bag. It’s narcissistic and self-serving. The whole thing is off-putting. Ramona looks at the auction items with Harry, telling him that he can buy her something. She looks at a necklace LuAnn donated, and says he can buy her that. He tells her to try it on. He sees LuAnn, and says she looks gorgeous. She tells him that she bought a house upstate. It’s quiet and chill. She didn’t know Ramona and Harry were an item, and he says he never said that. They’ve gone out a few times, and this brings back memories. In LuAnn’s interview, she says if Harry and Ramona were really an item, it’s enough for her to gag. It’s gagable. LuAnn has to leave, and Barbara shows up.

Ramona says she has to make a speech. Dorinda, Bridie, and Sonja go up front with her. She thanks everyone for coming. She tells Sonja not to laugh, and Sonja says it’s because Ramona will cry at the drop of a dime. Ramona asks why Sonja is doing this to her? Mind you, this is in front of all the people who have come to this fundraiser. Dorinda tells Ramona, start over. Ramona again calls Bridie Birdie, and Sonja corrects her. Ramona says it was put together at the last minute, and Sonja tells her not to cry. Ramona says Sonja is upsetting her. Dorinda can stand it no longer, and tells them to stop. Ramona tries again, saying because of them, they’re raising money and getting recognition. Children who have been sexually abused are afraid to come forward. Dorinda keeps talking while Ramona is speaking, and keeps saying to tell them it can be a friend of the family. Sonja thinks they should hear it from the horse’s mouth, referring to Birdie Bridie. Bridie says she told her story for the first time in five and a half years. Until people share their story, no one knows. Dorinda interrupts, and Ramona says, let her finish. Sonja says, clip. Clip-clip-clip. Dorinda says don’t mock her. Bridie – who has to be absolutely humiliated – soldiers on, saying when she shared her story, the next day, the man who molested her, admitted it. Nothing can be done because of the laws, and until everyone gets involved… While she’s speaking, Dorinda won’t shut up, even though she’s using a low inside voice. She tells Sonja, don’t ever do that to her again. In her interview, Ramona says she was mortified. She brought 120 of her friends, and they embarrassed her. Bridie thanks everyone for coming.

Dorinda says Sonja was being aggressive. Sonja says at least they raised the money already. Ramona gripes to Bridie, and Sonja says Ramona and LuAnn are on their high horses.

Next time, Sonja stays with LuAnn upstate, the women visit LuAnn, Barbara says she’s sexually fluid (they just have to be hot), Barbara tells LuAnn not to forget who her friends are, and Bethenny confronts LuAnn.

☕ In Case You’re That Particular…

The offending to-go coffee cup has been removed.


Westeros was the first place to actually have Starbucks, it’s a little known fact.Game of Thrones executive producer Bernie Caulfield

📡 Bridie’s Story…

While I’m not normally all that serious here, and certainly not serious about the Housewives, I thought I’d take the opportunity to pluck a gem from the rubble.

May 7, 2019 – Freedom For Kristina, the President Doesn’t Like Charles, Beverly Hills Goes Camping (Sort Of, Not Really), Promised Throne, Snarky Throne, Reason Rebut, Rogue Coffee Cup & Finally


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Carly comes down to find Jax. They hug.

Anna tells Finn that Robert drives her crazy, but has a way of giving her clarity. She realized the truth was staring her in the face. Peter isn’t her son.

Peter takes Maxie onto a private plane. He wanted to make sure their overdue date was special. She says, a five-star restaurant is special. This is… She tells him it’s hard to pack when you don’t know where you’re going. Is he going to tell her? He says, guess. She guesses they’re going to see a Broadway show in New York. He says, no, but it’s a city. She says, LA? Chicago? Are they going to Portland to see Georgie? He says, no, but he’s filing that away for next time. Think bigger, like internationally. She says it’s a good thing she always takes her passport, and he says he took that into consideration. He says there are bridges, and a tower by a guy named Eiffel. She says, they’re going to Paris?

Michael tells Willow, yesterday was huge for Kristina and his family. He knows it was intensely painful, but Willow says, it was for a good cause. Michael says, that doesn’t make it easier, and thanks her again.

Neil tells Kristina that she’s free to go. The choice is hers. Chase appears at the door and says, there she is. He tells Kristina that she’s not an easy person to find.

Sam arrives at DOD. Shiloh says he was beginning to think she changed her mind. She hands him the recorder, and says it’s her Pledge to him and everything he stands for. She goes inside, and he smiles behind her back. She says, it’s so quiet, and wonders where everyone went. He says they went to a rally in Beecher’s Corners. Normally, he’d be there, but her Pledge requires his special attention. He listens to what she’s recorded.

Anna tells Finn that she has no way of knowing how Cabot’s procedure worked, but guesses it’s a memory that Alex wouldn’t be strong enough to carry on her own; giving birth to a son, and giving him up for adoption. That’s the memory that was implanted; she knows it. She says she should hate Alex, but she doesn’t. She feels kind of sorry for her.

Maxie says she hasn’t been in Paris in forever, and even then, it was only for work. Tell her about it. He describes some sights, and she says he’s using a lot of words she can’t pronounce (and I can’t type that fast). He says he’s talking about the stained glass. When the sun hits it; it’s stunning. He says they can get ice cream, and the best falafel she’s ever had. She says, dessert before lunch? She’s in. She wonders if they can get a croissant in there, and he says they can get one at the metro. She says, bread from a subway station? She’ll see. The attendant says they’re ready for take-off.

Sam asks Shiloh if there’s something wrong. He’d assumed the secret would be about her, but she says she’s already told him all her secrets. He says, it’s about Jason. That means Jason still matters to her. She says, of course (🍷). He’s Danny’s father. He’ll always be a part of her life, whether she likes it or not. Doesn’t it show him how far she’s willing go for him and DOD? She’s putting her own son’s father at risk. He says he’ll transcribe a copy for her to sign. Since she’s already made her financial contribution, they can start her initiation now.

Sonny tells Chase that they’re having a family gathering. He asks who Neil is, and Neil introduces himself, adding that he’s a psychologist. Sonny asks what brings Chase by, and he says he was looking for Kristina. Valerie got a call from her, saying she needed help. Sonny says they got things sorted out, but Chase wants to hear that from Kristina.

Carly says Josslyn will be happy to see Jax. He tells her to let Josslyn rest. Carly says she hasn’t done a lot of that lately. It’s been heart breaking for her, but she’s she’s been strong and so brave. Jax wonders where she gets it from. Carly wishes she could do more to get Josslyn through it, but Josslyn won’t let her. She had to experience all of it. Jax says she’s done more than she knows, and Carly says so has he. He made time to speak to Josslyn every night. She’s sure the time difference made it complicated. She thinks the distance made him a safe place for Josslyn to stay. She could describe Oscar to someone who wasn’t there watching him die. He says he struggled about whether he should get on a plane immediately, but she thinks it was more helpful to wait. He did the right thing, the best thing, by showing up now. Josslyn needs her dad.

Finn asks how Anna feels, and she says it’s complicated. She’s relieved that it wasn’t her who put on a wig and went to Faison. He was a monster. Now she knows she never… Finn says, it’s a huge plus. He can’t imagine how she must have felt; how freaked out and panicked she was. She says, technically, she can, but it wasn’t her; it was Alex. The irony is, Valentin suspected it. When they had that conversation. he never said if it was Alex or her. She never thought she’d be saying this, but she should have listened to him.

Willow and Michael sit outside Kelly’s. Willow says, it’s comfortable. Opening up to him about the pain of missing her son, and now it’s same way. It’s mortifying that she could ever think of being with Shiloh. Michael says he forced her to do something she’d never do on her own, and not to blame herself or think she chose it. It was completely wrong. He suggests maybe she should talk to somebody. He had a similar experience, and didn’t want talk to anyone, but it helped. She says she’ll look into it. Nina approaches their table.

Kristina tells Chase that she just needed get away for a few days. Alexis says Neil was available for some much needed counseling. Kristina says she feels better now, and Chase says there were some concerns, so he was following up. Kristina says she’s right there. She’ll call Valerie when she goes home. Chase says, sorry to bother them, but Alexis says, no apology necessary. After Chase is gone, Neil tells Alexis that her family is adept at… Alexis says, lying? He says he was looking for a more delicate word, but yes. Kristina asks if Alexis rented out her room, or put in a home gym. Alexis says Kristina knows she doesn’t work out. They hug.

Jax tells Carly, it appears congratulations are in order. She thanks him, and he asks when she’s due. She says, late September, early October. He asks if there will be the same complications as with Josslyn, but she says, not this time. She’s being monitored carefully, and she’s eating super healthy. He’d be proud. He says it explains what was going on with Josslyn. She asks what he means, and he says a few weeks ago, during the Niagara Falls incident, he sensed she wanted tell him something, but she didn’t say anything. Carly says, Josslyn has been caught up in everything Oscar. If she has an opinion, she didn’t share it. He says he can lecture her, but she says, please don’t. He’s happy for them, especially Josslyn. After the loss she’s suffered, she gets a new person to love. Carly thanks him for being so wonderful. Jason comes in, and tells Jax that Milo said he was there. He asks if it’s a bad time, but Jax says it gives him a chance to say hi, and thank him.

Shiloh tells Sam, typically, for the initiation, she’d wear a special garment, and her fellow Trust members would be there. Sam is glad it’s just the two of them, and he says he is too. He holds out the cup, saying, something to calm her nerves. She asks if she seems nervous, and he says, no. She tells him that she doesn’t need that. She wants to be fully aware of everything he has planned, and experience it all. He says there will be pain, but she thinks she can handle it. She reclines on the pillows, and he promises, the discomfort will pass, and be followed by pleasure.

Jax says it’s good to see Jason. Carly was thrilled when she found out he was alive. She says, thrilled and grateful he’s been there for her. She’s especially grateful he’s been there for Josslyn. He’s been great, giving her someone to really talk to. She melted down on him. He’s been a good friend. Jax knows what a good friend he is to have, and on behalf of their daughter, thanks him. Jason says they don’t have to thank him. Josslyn is amazing. She’s confident, determined, and one of the bravest people he knows. She’s like Carly in a bunch of ways, but he sees a lot of Jax; compassion, joy, and kindness. Carly says, excuse me? She’s joyful and kind. She’s as joyful as you can get. They just look at her, and she says, what?

Nina tells Michael that she’s sorry to hear about his cousin. Such a tragedy; he was so young. She asks how Josslyn is, and Michael says, hanging in there. It’s very difficult for her. Nina asks him to give his family her condolences. She says, on that note, Sasha is doing great. She thanks him for coming see Sasha, and Michael says he might have given her that cold. Nina is glad they’re both on the mend. Michael asks Willow if she wants coffee, and Willow says, that would be great. He goes inside, and Nina wonders if she’s misreading the situation. Willow asks what she’s talking about, and Nina says Willow knows exactly what she’s talking about.

Anna tells Finn that she can practically pinpoint the time she was taken to the cabin. After Peter was born, and the adoption was arranged in Brussels. Finn says, it makes sense. Anna says it must have been the thing resonating with Alex at the time the transfer happened. It would have been at the top of her mind, and explains why it was given to her. She has to hand it to Cabot; it really worked. Even though she knows it’s Alex and not her who gave birth to Peter, it doesn’t change any visceral feelings. She can remember the creaky stairs, the smell of the room, the midwife. She’s glad it was her sister, but it still feels like it was her. Finn says, in her heart, she still feels like Peter’s mother? and she says, yeah, she does, and she doesn’t want him to know she’s not.

Maxie tells Peter about going to dinner at an out of the way place. It only had eight tables, and the best escargot. He says escargot along with her, and tells her it’s his favorite restaurant in Paris – La Petite Cote, the little cave. Maxie can’t believe it. He asks when she was there, and she says, seven years ago for Fashion Week. He says he was there in the spring of 2012. Imagine if they’d met. Maxie wonders if they would have liked each other, and he says he probably would have asked her out. She says she probably would have said yes, and suggests they’d have gone to dinner at La Petite Cote. He says, that’s a fifth date spot. She says then they would have gone somewhere flirty and superficial. Then she would have gone back to the states, and they would probably have never seen each other again. He’s glad it didn’t work that way. He’s glad they got know each other’s hearts first. Maxie excuses herself to go to the bathroom.

Michael gets a text from Sonny – Your sister is back. Thank Willow. Outside, Nina says, Michael’s cousin just died, and Willow says, it’s awful. She tells Willow, to save this wrist on forehead for her boyfriend Chase. Willow asks if Nina is accusing her of hitting on Michael. Nina says she knows women like Willow. They play the victim, and need attention from men. She scored with Chase, and now she needs Michael to fill the bill? Willow says, that’s ridiculous, and Nina says, it’s true. As women, they know what’s going on. She needs to content herself with the one she has, and leave Michael alone.

Kristina asks Alexis if it’s cool if she comes home for a while. Alexis wants her to live there forever. Kristina is embarrassed, but Alexis tells her, don’t be. Only Shiloh should be embarrassed. Sonny says Shiloh will never be able to hurt her again, and Kristina hugs him.

Carly asks Jason if he’s heard anything about Kristina. He says he’s still waiting, and Jax asks, what’s going on? Carly says, Kristina got herself involved in a cult. It’s a long story, but Sonny and Alexis are trying to snap her out of it. They’re praying it works. Jason says if that wasn’t the case, the whole family would be there for Josslyn. Carly thanks Jax again for coming. If the family can’t be there for Josslyn, it’s probably for the best. Josslyn needs to be with a parent, not her crazy extended family. Jason gets a text – All good with Kristina. You’re clear to get Sam. Jason tells them, everything is good. He just came by to see if they needed anything. He leaves, and Jax says he’s sorry about Kristina. Carly says, it’s all right now. Jax says Sonny and Alexis are looking after their daughter. Now they need to look after theirs.

Anna tells Finn, if it was up to Robert, he’d have her tell Peter immediately. He hates Peter. He can’t forgive what Peter did, and the fact that he’s Faison’s son. It’s her biggest challenge. He’s hard headed and stubborn, and she can’t do that to him. She doesn’t want to. Finn says, then don’t. The reality is that she doesn’t know if any of this is true.

Finn asks, does she know what happened? In her heart she does, but can she show him facts? She can’t because there are none. She asks if he doesn’t believe what she’s saying. He says that’s not what he means. He lived through it with her, but there’s no medical proof that Peter was the memory transfer. And at the end of the day, that’s the story she can tell herself. There’s no proof.  She smiles, and thanks him.

Maxie tells Peter that she’s just excited to get there, and asks where they’re staying. Left Bank? Right Bank? Not that it matters. He says maybe she’s not ready for the plane trip and knowing hearts. He doesn’t want her feel like she needs to fake it or force herself to have a good time. Maybe it’s too much too soon. It’s okay. She frowns at him.

Carly says Josslyn must be catching up on weeks of sleep. Jax says she must be exhausted. Oscar’s death is going to hit her all over again. Carly says she’s probably dreaming Oscar is still alive. Jax says Josslyn was never in denial about Oscar’s prognosis. Carly says, she understood, but like with any other life altering event, you can prepare and accept it… Jax says, until it happens. Carly says Josslyn was so calm and proactive. She helped nurse Oscar through his seizures, and never lost it. I beg to differ, but I’ll let it pass. Carly says Josslyn and Oscar had a forward momentum; they had a plan. Jax says she told him about the list. Carly says, on the last day, Josslyn had a book Oscar never read, and she got to reading it to him. She had a purpose, and now she has to figure out what life looks like without Oscar, and what it means to her. Jax says, maybe she’ll do nothing at first. Carly says, or be overreactive, like her mother. Carly wants to guide her, and help her get through it. Jax says the most important thing is for them to be present. They can take their cues from Josslyn, and if she goes too far off the rails, they’ll intervene.

Chase sees Willow, and tells her that he saw Kristina. Michael comes out of Kelly’s, and says he has great news. Chase says he does too. He found Michael’s sister.

Kristina can’t believe she’s thanking Sonny for having his henchmen kidnap her and take her to a safe house until she came to her senses, but she is. Sonny says, without incriminating himself, in his business, he has the power to intervene on his family’s behalf. He’ll never regret having that power. Alexis doesn’t think they should discuss crimes. Sonny and Kristina both say, alleged crimes. Alexis tells Neil, welcome to her world, and Neil says, what a colorful world it is.

Jason peeks into the window at DOD. He tries the door, but it’s locked.

Anna tells Finn that he’s right. He says, of course (🍷). She says, pinning all this on Peter isn’t fair. She’s the only mother he knows. She thinks that she could love him like a son, and maybe if he hangs around long enough, they could have a real relationship. Finn says, maybe Peter will realize how lucky he is to have her in his life. She says she knows who she’s lucky to have. He looks around, and says, oh, him. She thanks him, and tells him that she can’t say it enough. They hold hands.

Peter says he’ll tell the pilot to turn around, and Maxie says, sit. He does, and she says, if they turn around, and he takes her to Paris next week and not today, she’ll regret it for the rest of her life. She knows she’s nervous; her rambling proves it. He says, what rambling? and she says, embarking with him on whatever this might be, means Nathan and the life they shared together is over. She’s learned nothing good happens if you stay paralyzed. You have to be willing to take a leap. She’s ready. That’s why she’s there. She knows this is right, and knows how they feel about each other. She doesn’t want the plane to turn around. He kneels in front of her, and kisses her. She thanks him for taking her to Paris, and he thanks her for taking a leap.

Willow is relieved Kristina is out of the DOD situation, and Michael says, thanks to her. Chase says he didn’t want to get Michael’s family in trouble. Shiloh is bad news, and if he got his hooks back into her, it could have ended worse; not just for her, but Willow. He wasn’t trying to be a jerk. He’s happy it worked out. Michael says they had different methods, but wanted the same thing. He’s grateful for the both of them. He leaves, and Chase says, what a day. What scared him most was that if Sonny and his family were busted for kidnapping, she would be there. He doesn’t want anything bad to happen to her. She thanks him for caring, and looking out for her, but she would gladly have taken that risk if it meant getting Kristina away from Shiloh. Chase says, it must be nice, and she says, it feels good. Like she’s finally back in charge of her own life. She’s happy she did it. He’s happier it’s behind them. She says, her too, and they kiss.

Carly says, grief is a journey. It’s like walking through the woods in the dark. You know there’s another side, but you have to go through it. Jax says Josslyn can do it, and if not, they’ll be there for her. Carly asks if he wants her to book a room at the MetroCourt, friends and family discount. He says it’s already booked, and she says, of course (🍷). She asks how long he’s staying in Port Charles, but he’s not sure. He’s working out the details. She asks if he’s staying a while, and he says, that’s the plan.

Sonny asks if they’re ready to go. Alexis says she’ll be right behind them. She thanks Neil, and says she doesn’t know what… She knows they couldn’t have gotten through it without him. He’s glad Kristina is safe, and she says that makes two of them. He tells her, this is just the beginning. The work just started. She says, whatever it takes, and he says, he has no doubt.

Shiloh says, ready? We hear the buzz of the tattoo tool. Sam smiles, and says, yeah; she’s ready. He dips another tool into the ink.

Jason kicks in the door.

Tomorrow, Carly asks if Sonny and Jax are getting along, Valerie tells Brad that DOD is bad news, Kim wants to talk to someone about her son, and Jason takes out his gun.

The Haves and The Have Nots

When we last left, my heart had been ripped from my chest as Derrick showed Hanna his lion tattoo.  The tattoo of the man who raped her. The man who is Candace’s father. She backed away, as he sobbed, reminding us all of how unfair life is.

He says he was nineteen. He didn’t even remember her. He knows that’s bad to say, but he didn’t. He was so high; he didn’t even remember. He went to jail that night for robbing a liquor store. He prayed to find the woman he did that too, but he didn’t know it was her. He asks her to please forgive him. He’s so sorry. She tells him not to come near her. He keeps asking her to forgive him, and she tells him, go – now. Benny comes in and asks, what’s going on? Hanna says, nothing, but Benny says, it doesn’t look like nothing. Hanna says Derrick was just leaving, and Benny says he’ll watch him leave.

When Derrick is gone, Benny asks, what happened? She was so happy a while ago. She tells him to drop it. They’re going to see if get a notary to come there and sign the papers in the morning. He asks what about the interest? but she says they’re not going to do that.

Justin stands in front of Jeffrey with a broken bottle to his own neck. Jeffrey tells Justin, stop it; don’t do it. Justin asks why Jeffrey is making this so hard. He gave up everything. Jeffrey says he’s sorry, but he’s not doing anything. He asks Justin to put the broken bottle down. He does, and hugs Jeffrey. He doesn’t know why no one loves him. Does Jeffrey love him? Jeffrey says he does, and Justin tells him, prove it. Stay with him tonight. Jeffery suggests starting with dinner. Justin says he can cook. Jeffrey thinks Justin should talk to someone, and wants them to go together. Justin asks, like couples therapy? Jeffrey says, kind of. He thinks Justin should go first; he’s a little obsessed. Justin says Jeffrey made him that way, and they’ll talk about it later. Jeffrey agrees.

Jeffrey picks up the broken glass. Justin goes in the kitchen, and Jeffery texts Madison the address. Justin brings out more wine. He asks who Jeffrey was texting, and Jeffrey says his dad. He didn’t want David to worry. He doesn’t know Jeffrey is there. Justin says good; David hates him. He says Jeffrey knows what David did to him. Jeffrey says he’s sorry, and Justin thanks Jeffrey for loving him.

Madison’s phone rings. It’s David. He tells David he’ll be right there, and David tells him hurry. He asks if Madison knows where Jeffrey is, but Madison says he doesn’t. Madison asks another nurse, if she had a friend in trouble, and the friend’s father could help him, would she let the father know? She asks if he’s an adult. Madison says, yeah. She says he should tell Jeffrey’s father. He asks how she knows it’s Jeffrey, and she tells him that he’s not good at this. Madison says he did it in the past, and Jeffrey got mad. She says, he’s grown. Madison can’t make him do what he doesn’t want to, and neither can his father. Madison has to go change David’s bandages. She tells him if he thinks Jeffrey is in danger, he should say something. She asks, is it life or death? He says, could be, and she says, then do something.

Jim tells Kathryn that he can’t get Veronica on the phone. They’re going to jail. Kathryn says he’s been there before, and he says she’s not taking him seriously. She says she’s taking him with a shot of vodka, and goes upstairs. His phone rings. It’s Mitch. He wonders who Mitch is, and Mitch says, Malone. He was at the house with Benny. Jim says, Mama Rose’s grandson. Mitch says he has a problem. Jim says he has a lot of problems; be more specific. Mitch says his son. His uncle knows it was him. Jim acts ignorant, and Mitch asks if he wants to play games. Wyatt did what he did to Mitch’s uncle, and they have a hit on him. Jim asks if Rose put the hit on Wyatt, and Mitch says, no; they’ve tried to keep it from her. There were a couple of guys in jail trying to hit him. His uncle wants blood, but Mitch thinks he can get him to not do anything. He needs to speak with Jim, but in the meantime, he’s to keep his son out of sight. Mitch hangs up, and Jim says, what the hell?

Hanna takes a pill, as we all would. She calls Kathryn and says she’s not good. Kathryn says Jim won’t come near her. Hanna asks if Kathryn set her up, putting her in the brownstone, and giving her a makeover? Kathryn asks what Hanna is talking about, and Hanna says, Derrick. Did she know he was in jail? Kathryn says, yes, and Hanna asks why Kathryn didn’t tell her. Kathryn says Derrick has worked for her for years, and he’s a changed man. Hanna asks if she knows what he was in for, and Kathryn says, armed robbery. Hanna asks, is that all? Kathryn is sorry she didn’t tell Hanna, but he’s a really good man. Hanna says, he raped her. Kathryn says she’s calling the police, but Hanna says, not now; years ago. Kathryn is shocked, and asks how Hanna knows. Hanna says she saw his tattoo, and he told her he did it. Kathryn says, oh my God, and Hanna replies, that’s what she said. She says, it was a long time ago. The thing is, that makes him Candace’s father. Kathryn says, this is too much. Hanna says, she was raped and got pregnant. She’ll never forget his lion tattoo. It’s all she could see. She never wants to see him again, and tells Kathryn not to send him over. Kathryn says she won’t, and asks if Candace knows. Hanna says, she knows about the rape, but doesn’t know about him. Kathryn apologizes again, and Hanna says she didn’t know. Kathryn says she’s coming over, but Hanna says, it’s over. She tells Kathryn that a notary is coming in the morning, and to tell her husband. Kathryn says she’s not telling him a damn thing. Hanna says, tell Jim so he’ll leave her son alone, and Kathryn says, okay, and tells Hanna to call if she needs anything. This is just so sad.

Kathryn calls Derrick, and leaves a message for him to call her.

At the White House, the President (whose name I still don’t know, and apparently, neither does IMDb) toasts to new blood. First Lady Margaret says she likes Candace, and Candace thanks her. Margaret asks how they met. Landon starts talking, but the President says, no spin. He wants to hear it from Canace. Candace says they met at the hotel. She was studying in the lobby while she was waiting for her room. She walked over, and said hello, not knowing he was running for President. He had his hat pulled low, and said, hi… Charles finishes, I don’t need another drink. Candace says he thought she was a waitress. Then a guy tried to hit on her, and he came to her rescue. They started talking, have been together ever since. They President says, it’s getting late. They should wrap it up. He thanks them for coming, and tells Candace that she’s lovely. On his way past Candace’s chair, he whispers that she’s a hot piece of Black ass. Candace asks if there’s a restroom, and Margaret shows her the way.

David asks why Madison is so late. Madison says he had to take a cab. He’s having car issues. David is on edge, and Madison asks if he’s in pain. David says, always, but Madison sees he’d been drinking, and can’t give him something. David asks if he knows where Jeffrey is, but he says he doesn’t. David asks Madison to call Jeffrey now. He gets voicemail, and David says call from his phone.

Justin brings the food out. Jeffrey’s phone rings, but Justin tells him not to answer. Jeffrey says he needs to make sure his dad is okay. Justin gets pushy, and asks for the phone. He grabs it, and says, look; it stopped ringing. It’s okay. Can they please have a nice dinner? He’s been through a lot, and would like it to be just them. if it’s important, he’ll call back. Justin tells Jeffrey, dig in.

Madison tells David that Jeffrey still isn’t answering. David asks if he’s with that boy, but Madison says he doesn’t know. The last time he told David what Jeffrey was up to, Jeffrey got upset. He’s not getting in the middle of this. David says, so Jeffrey is with that boy. He’s dangerous. Madison says he knows, and David asks, how? Madison says Justin destroyed his car. He threatens and manipulates Jeffrey. David asks if Jeffrey is at Justin’s apartment. Madison tells David that Jeffrey said he was going there, and texted the address. He begs David not to tell Jeffrey. David tells him hurry with the bandages.

Charles tells the President that it was a great dinner. The President looks at him weird, and he says, sir? The President says, now that everyone is gone, he has something to tell Charles. They don’t like him, or Candace. They think he’s an arrogant a-hole who won be default. Even before he won, the party was planning his demise. He tells Charles, enjoy his four years. Margaret comes back, and says Candace is a gutter trash girl – God bless America. They leave, and Charles looks stunned. Landon comes in.

Some women walk past the restroom, and one says, he’s going to screw this country up. Another says, but at least he has a hot tart to screw. After they’re gone, Candace comes out of the bathroom. Landon asks if Charles is okay. Charles says, yeah, and suggests they get the hell out. Landon says it’s his new home, but Charles says, it’s not the place. The people left a foul taste in his mouth. Candace joins them, and he says, let’s get out of here.

Veronica finds RK in her living room, and tells him to get the hell out of her house. He says, fine, and starts to leave. He says he’s almost to the door, and she tells him, get to it. He says he’s not coming back, and she says, wait. He says he knew she didn’t want him to leave. She asks if he has her jewelry. He says that’s what he wanted to talk to her about. She says, if he doesn’t, guess what’s going to happen? He’s going to jail. He says he tried to get it back; he sort of sold it. She says, that’s his ass, and he says they’re better than this. She suggests he enjoy his last few moments of freedom. He says maybe he can work it off. He knows her fantasies and what she wants. He thinks it’s a good trade. She calls him a child. She says she’s a grown-ass woman, and he’s terrible in bed. He tells her, some people need to be taught. She says she asked him one thing, to get her son’s attention, and he couldn’t do that. He says that’s not him, and she says that’s not her son either. He knows she wants him all to herself. She asks if he wants breakfast, but remembering the grits, he says, no; he’s good. She says she told him to get her jewelry, but he says, they don’t got it. Veronica makes a call, and says she’d like to report a burglary. He says he can make her feel good. She says her husband’s coming back, and RK says they can give him a show. She tells the police, never mind, and says so she wants to be taught. She laughs.

The Attorney General asks the President if the guests have left. The President gets him a drink, and he asks if the President called her a hot piece of Black ass. The President says he should have seen the look on her face. The AG says he would have paid to see it, and the President says he should have come. The AG says, no. He wants to blindside the bitch who robbed him. The President can’t believe this is it. They had a good eight years. The AG says, not all of them, and the President says, every President has his thing.  The AG asks how he thinks the new administration will do, and the President says Charles is an arrogant snot-nosed kid. The party is ready to take him down, but he’s been pretty clean up until this. The sad thing is, he thinks Charles likes her. Why the hell else would he bring a whore into the dining room? The AG says they’ve all done it, but the President says, not before taking office. The AG says he can’t overlook what she did to him. The President says she has no idea who she pissed off. The AG says, no, she doesn’t, and she’ll regret it. He’s going to devastate that bitch whore, and take down the President Elect at the same time. They drink to the hell coming Charles’s way.

In the limo, Candace’s phone rings. She tells Charles, it’s her brother; she’ll call him later. Charles asks if she’s okay, and she asks if she embarrassed him when she was at the table. She heard them talking about her. Charles tells her, before they left, the President said he can’t stand Charles, and wants him to fail. She says, they seemed nice, but he says, they’re playing a game. Don’t fall into it. Rise above it. She says, when they go low, she goes lower, and they laugh. He says he needs her to keep him sane. She says she’ll keep him sane, all right, and he bets she will. She says she couldn’t leave him with those fools. He says she makes him so happy, and she tells him that he’d better remember that when she has to choke one of those ho’s. They kiss, and she asks if he’s done it in a Presidential motorcade. She doesn’t think he would, but he says there’s a lot she needs to learn about him. He tells the driver, the hotel.

Jeffrey tells Justin, the alfredo sauce is good. There’s an insistent knock at the door, and David tells Jeffrey to open it. Justin asks how he knew, but Jeffrey doesn’t know. Justin tells him, hide in the bathroom. To my surprise, he does. David continues banging, and I’m thinking, unless Justin clears the dishes, David will know someone is there. Justin opens the door, and David asks where his son is. Justin says, he’s not there, and David pushes past him. Justin says, coming in? and David says, damn right.

Justin says he’s been waiting for this moment, and puts a gun to David’s head. David asks what the hell he’s doing, and Justin says, breaking and entering. He’s got David now.

Next time, Wyatt hunts his family with a rifle, and Mitch tells Benny that his uncle will break Benny’s legs, and still want the money.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

I heard LVP isn’t even in this episode. Why bother? Oh wait, I can make fun of Teddi. And Dorit. And…

Teddi tells Kyle, no glam squad. Kyle says, if a bear sees you, you have to be cute.

Harry wonders why LisaR is bringing ten pairs of shoes for one night. She says she needs a hair dryer, and he asks if there’s going to be electricity on the trail. She says the most important thing, and adds a bottle of wine. He tells her that she has a bag for three weeks. She says she’s totally prepared, just in case.

Teddi says being outdoors in LA means wearing full-face makeup and not being outdoorsy at all. LisaR says she’s nervous, but it’s good. In her interview, Kyle says she likes to be prepared. She has a machete, tick spray, and an epi-pen.

The women meet at Teddi’s. Erika is the first to arrive, followed by Kyle, who tells them that she got a text from PK. He said he was just joking around. She wishes Dorit had handled it better, instead of making excuses. She told him that she lets go of things easily, it’s done, and thanked him for the text. She doesn’t know if there will be residual feelings from Dorit.

In her interview, Erika says she’s been camping her whole life; she’s a tomboy. In Dorit’s interview, she’s hoping to enjoy the great outdoors, and not have any tension with Kyle on the trip. They get into the RV where there’s a spread waiting. Camille is the last to get there. In her interview, Denise says she’s heard Camille talk about the other women, and doesn’t think she’ll shut up during the trip. She wonders if it’s gong to be another trip where everything goes sideways, or will they have a good time?

Erika says she wanted to be a truckdriver or a Playboy bunny when she was young. The women are already freaking out about various aspects of being outside, and in her interview, Erika says, these chicks are having a meltdown, and they haven’t even left LA. They discuss sleeping arrangements, and stop at a grocery store for dinner and tomorrow’s breakfast. Teddi says all they need are hot dogs, hamburgers, and alcohol. LisaR suggests donuts, and Dorit says everyone is grabbing things like it’s Armageddon. In LisaR’s interview, she says they need the whole camping experience of food. She puts Cheetos in the cart. Denise asks if they think they’re good for one night, and the tab comes to over $600. In Teddi’s interview, she doesn’t understand, since they won’t even use half of it.

Ventura ranch KOA. Deer! Peacocks! LisaR says it’s way better than she expected. It’s like glamping. No kidding. Those tents are more like hotel rooms. I’m not sure why they even brought an RV. In her interview, Erika wonders if there’s a dead body in LisaR’s bag. Vanderpump? Edwin’s assistant Michelle has come along, although no one explains why. LisaR unpacks. She’s going to change since she has so many choices.

Beer Pong is set up. Erika feels a little old to be playing that, and goes for a massage. Yeah, real camping. No one seems to know how to play Beer Pong, even a little bit, although Dorit scores some points. In her interview Teddi says, for a woman who has a lot of opinions on stemware, Dorit knows her way around a Solo cup.

Teddi asks if Kyle regrets going to see LVP. Dorit doesn’t know why LVP is angry with her. Teddi says Dorit was the one LVP was originally angry at. It was her punishment. Erika comes back in a golf cart, saying she really needed that. Denise asks how her face looks so good. LisaR says she can’t afford to squish her face, even for a massage. Don’t they have an opening for your face in the table? Dorit says as far as LVP goes, LVP drew a line in the sand. She couldn’t have made it clearer. Erika says, if you want to be an a-hole be an a-hole. She cares about the women who showed up. She never bought it, and never will. That’s how she feels. IN her interview, she says it’s like the queen who shows you the apple. Want some? Kyle misses her, but Teddi says it was her choice. Dorit says she gave them a fait accompli. She made it clear. Erika says her life will be fine without that bitch. Sorry, but not really.

They go hiking, and Kyle says she has a phobia about ticks. In Kyle’s interview, she says she likes being in the outdoors, but her husband always tries scaring her, saying there will be bugs. She just doesn’t like spiders, snakes, or any kind of bug. She clicks some sticks together, saying it calls the deer, which is news to me. Climbing instructor Forrest meets them. They harness up and climb a fake wall in the middle of a park that probably has real walls to climb. Teddi, Dorit, and Erika go first. In Erika’s interview, she says Dorit looks like Spiderman, and she’s impressed. In Teddi’s interview, she says Dorit kicked her butt rock climbing. Camille tells them the harness is like a strap-on. In her interview, she tells us that she and her ex did kinky sexy play. It’s what we do for the people we love. I don’t. Kyle, Camille, and LisaR go next. Kyle doesn’t like heights, and wonders why she’s climbing a fake rock. Peer pressure is ridiculous. When she thinks how high up she is, she gets scared. In her interview, she says her entire body goes numb. We flash back to her hanging back from looking at a view from a tower and being in a sky car. Kyle has enough, and goes back down.

Dinner is prepared. LisaR gets a massage. Denise says she used to be a vegetarian up until a few months ago. In her interview, she says up until she met Aaron, she was a vegetarian. Lola was devested when she found out Denise ate meat, like she’d been doing drugs. Dorit tells them, plastic on the grill isn’t a good idea. Wow. Even I know that. In Dorit’s interview, she says, these girls don’t belong anywhere near a fire. They’re going to kill somebody, if not themselves. They make a mess of a hamburger that totally falls apart. Teddi comes back, tells them they’re fired, and finishes the grilling. LisaR returns, and can’t believe they’re already eating.

Kyle asks Camille how she’s feeling about the wedding, and she says she can’t wait. Denise and Erika can’t go, and she says LVP didn’t come to her bridal shower, so she doubts LVP is coming to the wedding. Teddi says she’s reached out and done what she can. If she really cares, don’t text. Call if she really wants LVP there. In Camille’s interview, she says Teddi is inserting herself into a conversation where she shouldn’t necessarily be involved. Teddi says, it’s Camille’s big day. and the people there should be there for her. In her interview, Camille finds Teddi being a know-it-all irritating. I think Teddi’s problem might be that she thinks she’s still at work when she’s with her friends. I find her irritating too, and if she tried to accountability coach me when I didn’t ask for advice, I’d be tempted to smack her.

Teddi builds a fire (sounds like a children’s book). Kyle calls her Grizzly Adams. Denise comes back from her massage, and they talk about happy endings. Denise says Aaron never had one, so they went on a hunt. Everyone is shocked, and Teddi says Denise has a fetish. What? I guess she even knows it all about things she doesn’t know. Denise says she doesn’t. Aaron was the only dude she knew who never had one. He was mortified. In Kyle’s interview, she says if anyone went near her husband like that, they’d lose an arm, and he’d lose an important appendage. In Dorit’s interview, she says, it will never happen, PK. In Teddi’s interview, she says, her husband’s happy ending would have a happy removal shortly afterward. Erika says she never heard Tom say he had one, but she knows he was a young man once. Because she’s an unfiltered moron, LisaR asks if Denise watched, and Denise says, no! nearly spitting out her drink. Kyle asks if Denise has had one. Denise says she has, but didn’t plan for it. It just happened. She says she’s feeling judged. In her interview, LisaR says, if that’s what your freak flag wants to do, fly it. Just don’t get arrested. Erika asks why everyone is acting like nuns. In Denise’s interview, she says Aaron might be upset that she revealed this information. LisaR asks, who else has secrets? Because this is just the venue you’d want to reveal them in. Camille says she was in a relationship for three years in NYC, and they had incredible sexual encounters. She then explains how to massage a prostate, and we’ll leave it at that. Dorit asks who wants a drink. At this point, me.

Camille says it seems better with Kyle and Dorit. Dorit says PK sent her a text, and she doesn’t think what he said was malicious. Once again inserting herself, Teddi says, not malicious, but deliberate. Dorit comes back with drinks, and Kyle says they were talking about PK and the other night. He sent her a text. Dorit says, in the beginning she said she appreciated how Kyle felt. She thought they were good. Kyle tells her, men say stupid sh*t sometimes. Well, that about sums it up. Is it time to go home? Teddi says, even if it’s not malicious, he’s covering his own ass. The backtracking didn’t go well. In her interview, Camille says, Teddi has an answer for everything. That’s what I mean. I’m not defending her at all – she’s annoying as hell – but it’s what she does for a living and can’t turn it off. Teddi thinks he was acting out because of how he felt about the whole situation. Dorit doesn’t think it helps to be unfair afterward. Teddi says it wasn’t about Kyle, but Dorit doesn’t think so. Camille agrees. She says Teddi is knowledgeable for her age, but inserts herself where she doesn’t belong. Teddi hates people who talk down to her. Camille says sometimes she inserts herself in conversations that have nothing to do with her. Like after PK made the remark to Kyle. We flash back to her doing that. Camille says, it upset Dorit. Teddi tells her, stick to the storyline. Does she mean stay in her lane? Stay on topic? What? It sounds like it doesn’t apply. Teddi says she doesn’t like to be talked down to. The way she says Teddi is young, is passive/aggressive. Camille tells Teddi that she said Teddi pushed herself into a conversation between two of them. She sat there with LisaR, acting like she knew everything. Camille thought it was inappropriate, and she’s a bit of a know-it-all. Teddi says she noticed Camille likes to talk out of the side of her mouth, but backs down when she’s face to face. I dunno. I think Camille thinks out loud while she’s making up her mind. Teddi says she just expressed an opinion. Camille says Teddi thought there was a conspiracy going on. We flash back to Teddi thinking practically the entire season was manufactured by LVP. In Camille’s interview, she says, if you know that much, you don’t have to tell everyone how much you know. Wow. She’s right. LisaR says, this was all created by someone else, and Camille says, it’s like a toxic wave. Kyle can’t lie about what happened, but she still cares about LVP. She chose not to be there. Dorit says she had a friend who said there’s no friendship, and doesn’t love her. We flash back to how things ended with LVP. Then she had Kyle saying she had never heard LVP talk about Dorit. Kyle says she didn’t mean it that way. Denise thinks they should go onward and upward. Teddi says she’s not even drunk, and Erika says she’s drunk for her age. Ha-ha! Okay, that was funny. LisaR says, the sad part is, she’s the oldest in the group right now.

It’s morning, and Teddi goes for a run. Kyle says she’s a nut. LisaR says she had a dream that Kyle got Portia a squirrel. We see clips of Kyle planting fake spiders in the other so-called tents, and slipping a stuffed rat into LisaR’s tent. In her interview, Kyle says she never went to summer camp. Camille joins them, and it’s dead silent while they drink coffee. In Teddi’s interview, she says she’s not going down that rabbit hole. Erika puts whipped cream on a pumpkin pie, and forks the pie, not bothering to slice it. In her interview, she says, it’s the breakfast of champions. She ruins this by then eating Cheez-Wiz on crackers. Blech. It’s time to go, and I honestly don’t get it all this for one night. Seriously.

Back on the road, Kyle says she wants to do research on happy ending places. Erika says they’re all invited to her show on Sunday. She knows Camille is getting married, and Denise is filming, but the rest of them can bring their husbands if they want.

In her interview, Kyle thinks it helps relationships to get to a deeper place when they go on trips. Laughing, arguing, sharing things in a different place. You’re not getting that at a cocktail party. The women talk about social media, and Kyle says Instagram has changed since the Kardashians. And the ideal body type is unreal. LisaR says, it’s not an easy time to grow up. When they were growing up, they had a mirror to deal with. Now, there’s social media pressure to be perfect. In LisaR’s interview, she says her girls had a rough time. More than anything, she’s tried to teach them how to love themselves, no matter how they look. Kyle wonders if there’s more pressure in LA and Hollywood, but the others don’t know if that’s true anymore. Erika says she looks at herself like art. A project where she creates what she wants.

They sing Kumbaya, and Denise laughs.

Next time, LVP gets her new kitchen, Camille asks LVP to come to her wedding, and a disaster happens at Erika’s show.

🐲 In Case You Live Under a Rock…

Or just got online for the first time in your life today.

On Game of Thrones, Tormund informed Jon that only a madman or a king rides a dragon. The Hound said Sansa had changed, and also said, I told you so, but with more words. Gendry asked Arya to marry him and be the Lady of wherever he’s from, but she said she was never a lady and never would be. He didn’t give her the option of being a dude, so…  Jaime and Brienne had sex. I guess we can all die happy now. Dany was worried about having everything taken from her. She told Jon to never tell another soul who he really is. Even though he didn’t give a flying, she said it would take on a life of its own, no matter how many times he bent the knee. She told him the truth would destroy them, and even though she’d never begged for anything, she was begging for this. Since they had her help in the dead battle, Dany wanted Winterfell to reciprocate by going against Cersei. Bron proposed a plan to Tyrion and Jon, Sam and Jon promised they were BFFs for life, and everyone set sail for King’s Landing. Missandei and Grey Worm held hands on the boat. When Tyrion told him eight people knew about Jon’s lineage, Varys said it wasn’t a secret anymore, but an affirmation. No surprise, Cersei was a step ahead, and (sounds like) Urine Greyjoy was waiting with his own boats. I’ve about had it with CGI dragon abuse though, since we lost Dracarys. Needless to say, Dany was both pissed and vindictive, and Missandei was also lost in the battle. Cersei said their message was well received, and the head Sparrow, or whatever he is, said the people were glad for her protection. Cersei told the Greyjoy dude, well done, and talked about the child they were having. Cersei wasn’t worried about Dany coming for her, and was holding Missandei prisoner. This highly pissed off Grey Worm, who’d probably grieved for her already. Varys advised Dany against revenge. He begged her not to destroy the city she came to save, and become what she’s struggled to defeat. She said her destiny was to save the world from tyrants, and she’d do it if she had to kill a million innocent people first. Okay, she didn’t say that exactly, but that was the gist. Fight for peace. Varys asked Tyrion who would make the best ruler, and Tyrion said Jon didn’t want it. Varys asked how he knew it wasn’t someone who didn’t want it, and said Jon has what it takes. Tyrion believed his queen would make the right choice. Tyrion said most people claimed they didn’t care who sat on the throne, but Varys said if the wrong person did, it could cost those people their lives. He was loyal to the people, as I’d always thought. He said, each of them had a choice to make, and prayed they chose wisely. Brienne said Jaime was better than his sister. He’s a good man, but he couldn’t save her. He said he pushed a kid out a window and strangled his cousin with his bare hands. He wasn’t exactly a good guy. He went off to help Cersei, negating his pending good guy status, but I’m wondering if he might not sabotage her instead. Hey, I can dream. When Dany went to Kings Landing, I fully expected them to toss Missandei’s head out the door or throw her from a tower, but old guy Queen’s Hand came out to meet Tyrion. It kind of reminded me of the negotiations on Million Dollar Listing. Tyrion was like, work with me, help me here, and old guy was like, I’m just representing. Tyron was like, forget this, and went past him to his superior. He said he knew she didn’t care about her people, and they hate her, so what’s the difference? She always loved her children though, more than anything. Her reign was over, but that didn’t mean her baby had to die. I said to myself, you know she’s never giving in, and she confirmed that by saying now was the time for Missandei’s last words. Missandei looked at Grey Worm, and Cersei, who can’t do her own dirty work, had the Mountain chop Missandel’s head off, blending my predictions as her body fell from the rampart. This pissed Dany off even more, but she didn’t put a curse on Cersei in Dothraki as we all would have. She just stomped away. Then The Omen singers sang over the end credits.

🏆 And the Award For Snarkiest Recap Goes To…

I love them.


❓ I Have Some Answers…

In discussing why this season of GoT might suck, two reasons given were, Jon got rid of Ghost and Jaime left Brienne for Cercei. One, maybe Jon thought Ghost would be safer staying behind and we’ve already lost enough animals, plus a giant, and two, how do we know? We know what Jaime said, but how do we know?


☕ The Infamous Coffee Cup…

Uh-oh. Someone is in trouble. Probably the stage manager.



Nope. It’s Sansa who’s in trouble.


The final word.


The best quote.

The latte that appeared in the episode was a mistake, a spokesperson for the cable network said in a statement. Daenerys had ordered an herbal tea.

💃 My Feeling Upon Finishing This…

That was a lot of TV.