What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
Sam tells Jason that she’s proud of him. He says it was just a softball game, but she says he had three chances to let ELQ win. He says he’s not doing that, and she says she knows he thought about it. He wanted Michael to win. Jason says, Michael is worried about his girlfriend. It was a big deal that he even showed up to play. She asks if he considered it, and he says, maybe, but no one wants to win because you let them. Sam says that’s why she’s proud of him. She’s also proud that he hit the game winning run. She says, congratulations, slugger, and they kiss.
On the field, Obrecht says Peter has a blind bias. He called a strike, and it was clearly a ball. Maxie says she was crowding the plate, but Obrecht says she was asserting herself. Peter says they’re both right. He was trying to give them a taste of what it’s going to be like when they face Aurora. Jax is a great pitcher. Obrecht says, Jax will be there?
At the hospital. Hayden tells Jax that she looked at Sasha’s chart. Her symptoms sound the flu. There’s no reason to panic. He tells her not to be blasé around Nina and Valentin. Nina is beside herself. Hayden says since Nina and Valentin are both at the hospital, that means Windymere is deserted. They can get what they need and get out.
Lucas sees the for sale sign in Charlie’s window. He goes inside, and Julian asks if Brad is parking. Lucas says Brad had to go in to work. He says Julian is being pranked. Does he know there’s a for sale sign on the pub? Julian says, it’s not a prank; he’s selling. Lucas says he thought Julian loved the place. Julian says he does, but he loves Kim more, and they can’t take Charlie’s where they’re going. They’re moving to New York City.
Franco tells Drew, if Drew is him with a new face, how does Drew explain his face? Elizabeth says he hasn’t looked in a mirror, has he? He says, okay; he’ll play along. He’s not sure how much longer they’re going to try sell this. Drew tells him, look for himself, and hands him a mirror. Franco looks at his reflection, and says, who is this? Elizabeth says, it’s him. His name is Franco Baldwin, and she’s his wife Elizabeth. They got married last winter with bars between them, and vowed they’d never let anything come between them again because they love each other. He promised Cameron that he’d come back, so he’d better come back. She knows he’s still in there. Please, just come back.
Peter says he heard Jax was coming, but if they’re lucky he’ll be a no show. Word is that he has quite an arm. Maxie tells Peter that his mind games aren’t working. Don’t pretend he’s being intimidate by Jax. He grew up playing field rugby, or whatever they play over there. They’re going to kick Aurora all the way to Cooper. Besides, they’re down one player. Peter sees Lulu, and says here comes his knight now. She tells him that she’s just there as a cheerleader. She doesn’t know how to play.
Jax says he told Hayden no. She says Valentin has turned into lethal Valentin, but he says Valentin isn’t crazy enough to kill them. Hayden says they can’t afford to let the opportunity pass them by. He says the staff will see them coming a mile away, but she says she has a guy who can get them there undetected. The clock is ticking. Is he coming?
Lucas says Kim and Julian are really leaving? Kim says, not right away, and Julian says, finding a buyer for Charlie’s will take time. They have a lot to wrap up, and a lot of goodbyes. Lucas says, Brad isn’t going to be happy. They had no idea Julian was thinking about moving. Julian says it was a surprise to him too, but it feels like the right thing to do. New York has a lot to offer; there’s a lot of stimulation. Lucy calls, and Julian steps away. Lucas says Kim must be excited. She says she’d be more excited if she wasn’t taking Lucas’s father away from his children and grandchildren. He says she makes it sound like she’s kidnapping Julian, and she says Julian isn’t leaving for what Manhattan has to offer. He’s leaving for her.
Sam tells Jason, on behalf of the Corinthos Coffee team, she thanks him. He says she’s giving him too much credit, but she says he’s the hero this time. Next time, she wants to be short stop. He says Milo did well, but she says Milo belongs on first. Terrible Tony is terrible, but he pulled it off. She should have played. Jason says she almost died. She says she was glad she was able to sit and watch him. She’s grateful to be alive. They kiss some more, and Jason picks her up. He starts to carry her upstairs, and there’s a knock at the door. Robert says it’s their friendly neighborhood DA come for a chat. Jason puts Sam down, and she lets Robert in. Robert says she left GH without giving a statement. Sam says, so he came all the way there to get it? He says, among other things. He has a bit of good news, and a bit of bad news. What do they want first?
Franco says, Elizabeth, right? He knows she believes with all her heart that she knows him, but he doesn’t know her or this Franco person. He’s Chief Petty Officer Drew Cain, service number… Drew finishes the number, and says Franco has been given his memories. He knows it’s hard to believe. Franco says anyone with access to his personal file could get his service number. Drew asks, what about his face? and Franco says Drew doesn’t have it, and neither does he. Drew says, it’s hard to explain, and Elizabeth takes out Franco’s phone. She shows them a picture of them at their wedding reception last month. She says here’s his friend Liesl, and her boss Epiphany. Here are their boys. They love him and miss them. Does he think she’s fabricating all of this, and none of it is real? She shows him his driver’s license and his hospital ID, saying, everything has his face and name on it – Franco Baldwin. He says, they were issued in 2019. It’s 2012. Drew says, no, it’s not, and Franco says his last memory is from 2012. Where the hell have the last seven seen years gone?
Jax tells Hayden, no Spoon Island today. Hayden asks if there’s nothing she can do, and he says they have a prior commitment. Did she forget she’s Aurora’s CFO? She says he’s ditching their project for a corporate softball game? He says, next week, they’re playing Corinthos Coffee, and there’s no way he’s losing. She says while he’s goofing around, she’s doing the heavy lifting. He tells her to make sure no one is alerted to her presence. Get in and out clean. They’ll still be one player short. She says, it’s all taken care of. She leaves, and he puzzles over that.
Maxie says it could be good for Lulu to play, but Lulu says she doesn’t feel up to it. Peter says she doesn’t have to, but Obrecht says he’s the boss. He says, it’s supposed to be fun, not a chore, and she says they’ll smile while doing it. Fun will be had. She was prepared to strut her stuff. Now they’ll have to forfeit. Dustin shows up in an Aurora uniform, and says he was called in from the minors.
Sam tells Robert, when she came to, Jason was there and pried open the freezer. Robert asks if she got the feeling Shiloh had an accomplice. Jason says Shiloh claimed people were watching him, but he never saw anyone. He asks where Shiloh is, and Robert says, at the city slammer, cooling his heels. By this time tomorrow, he’ll be drowning in charges, thanks to Sam’s testimony and the others. Jason asks who else Shiloh went after.
Franco doesn’t understand, and Drew says he gets it more than anyone. He’s been where Franco is. Franco says Drew doesn’t know the first thing about him. He’d like to talk to his superior officer. Elizabeth says the Navy will confirm what they’ve been telling him. She knows it’s overwhelming. Franco tells them that he needs a minute to sort things out, and he does it better alone. They leave, and Franco gets up.
Kim tells Lucas that Julian is being kind, not telling him in front of her that she’s the reason he’s moving. Lucas deserves to know the truth. She kept telling herself things would get easier. She might not stop seeing Oscar around every corner, but eventually, it would get easier, but she’s still waiting for that day. Lucas asks if it’s not even a little easier, and she says hopes he never feels the emptiness that she does. She doesn’t even see it in sight. Not in Port Charles at least. She told his dad that she had to move. Lucas says Julian isn’t letting her go by herself, and she says, it’s one thing for her to leave; there’s little holding her there. It’s not the same for Julian. It comes at quite a cost. She tells Lucas, say the word, but Lucas says, it would break Julian’s heart. She says, say the word, and she’ll tell his dad that she has to do this alone.
Maxie asks if that isn’t Lulu’s ride share driver. Lulu asks Dustin what he’s doing there. He says he picked up a fair who hired him for the whole day. Peter says, they hired him as a substitute? and Obrecht says, it’s in flagrant violation of the rules. Peter says the team members work for their sponsors. Jax appears, and says he does. As of today, Dustin is the official driver of Aurora. Obrecht says they were wondering if Jax would make an appearance. Maxie says Obrecht was the only one wondering. Dustin says he wasn’t going to play, but found out they were playing The Invader, and thought maybe score some points off Lulu. Lulu says, is that so? but Maxie says, she’s not playing. Dustin says he spoke too soon, and Lulu asks if they have an extra mitt. Obrecht says they have all the necessary equipment for a team. Lulu says it looks like she’s playing, and asks Dustin if he’d care to make it interesting.
Jax tells Maxie that Nina is still at the hospital. He doesn’t think she’s leaving until Sasha’s fever is down. They need to pull this one out for her. His phone dings, and he sees a text from Hayden saying she’s in Valentin’s office, and moving to the trophy room.
Hayden takes out a tool to pick the lock.
Lucas says Kim made Julian a better man. He’s grown a lot, and the last steps he’s taken were because she inspired him. Kim says Lucas and Julian are just beginning to talk, but Lucas says they can still do that. He’ll miss Julian, but would rather see him be happy with her, than stuck there wondering what might have been. He tells her, go, and take his blessing with her. Julian comes back, and says Lucy is arranging a meeting with a prospective buyer. He asks if everything is okay, and Kim says she needs to get to GH. She leaves, and Julian asks Lucas, where were they? Lucas says, Manhattan is stimulating, and Julian says, they have the best theaters and museums, and no Sonny. Any day without Sonny is a good day for him. Lucas says he’ll be a long way from his family, but Julian says, it’s only an hour by plane. Lucas is glad Julian loves Kim enough to start somewhere new, but wants to make sure he’s not choosing to leave because Lucas made Julian feel unwelcome in his life.
Robert tells Sam and Jason, after Sam was put in the freezer, that wasn’t the end. Shiloh still had the flashdrive. Jason asks if it was recovered, and Robert says it’s intact, and is now evidence. They don’t know if it’s still fully functional after being used. Jason says, Shiloh used it? and Robert says, he tried to. Sam asks, on who? and Robert says,Cameron Webber.
Franco gets dressed. Elizabeth and Drew come back, and Elizabeth asks what Franco is doing. He says he’s getting ready to take off, but Elizabeth says he can’t leave. Franco says he can. Drew says the doctors aren’t ready to release him. Elizabeth says she knows he’s forgotten everything, but that can be fixed. They’ll find a doctor who can undo the procedure and get his memories back, so he can be Franco like he’s supposed to be. He says he doesn’t believe her, but say she’s right. What she’s telling him is that his memories were taken, and he was turned into a whole other person. Elizabeth says they’ll get his real memories back, and he can go back to his life being Franco. If the procedure was done, it makes sense that it can be undone, especially at GH. It’s one of the best hospitals in the country. Franco says, Port Charles, New York? Drew says he knows it? and Elizabeth says, of course (🍷); he lives here. Drew says what Shiloh did to him… Franco asks, who’s Shiloh? and Drew says he knows Shiloh by his real name – David Henry Archer. Franco says, Hank? Shouldn’t he be in prison? Drew says, he is, but not for what he did in Afghanistan. Franco says he lost seven years. They don’t get a say in what he doesn’t or doesn’t do. He starts to leave, but Drew says he’s not going anywhere.
Hayden keeps working on the lock, and finally gets the door open. She goes inside, and is startled by a cougar’s head.
Lucas says he kept Julian at arm’s-length, and wouldn’t let him near Wiley. Except when his family was threatened, he was self-centered, and asked Julian for help. He’s gotten used to the idea of Julian being involved, and likes Julian being in his family’s life, but it seems like it’s too late. Julian says Lucas doesn’t have to say it. He hears Lucas loud and clear. If he’d thought for one second there was no hope to have Lucas, Brad, and Wiley in his life, he would have left long ago. They hug.
Sam asks Robert how Cameron got pulled in. Robert says, Shiloh left the Midwood, and was skulking around, probably figuring out a way to leave town. He saw Cameron, who was easy picking. It was just bad luck. Sam says, Shiloh kidnapped Cameron? And Robert says he delivered Cameron to Cabot. He was desperate enough not to care who the procedure was done on. Jason says Elizabeth was looking for Cameron, and he helped her track him down. He was in a warehouse on Dewitt. Robert says, that’s where Shiloh was holding him. Sam asks what Shiloh did to Cameron, and Robert says, he let Cameron go. Franco wasn’t so lucky. Franco followed Cameron. They had prepped the kid, but Franco convinced them to use him instead.
Franco tells Drew, step aside. Elizabeth asks Franco to promise he won’t leave Port Charles. There are people there who care about him; he’s part of their lives. Enough people have been hurt already. Give them time. Franco says he’s asking nicely, and Drew says, okay. He’s free to go. Elizabeth tries to stop Franco, but Drew holds her back. She fights with him, telling him to let go of her, and says, Franco, please. Franco walks to the elevator, and looks in his wallet. He sees Kim walk by, and follows her. He says, Kim, and smiles.
Elizabeth tells Drew, please let her go. She needs to get her husband. Drew says, it’s not him, but Elizabeth says, he’s still in there. They can’t let him leave. Drew doesn’t think he will, but Elizabeth says they might never see him again. Drew says, they will. She says he doesn’t know that, but he says he knows. Because Franco is him, or some version of him. He wouldn’t be able to leave, and neither will Franco. Trust him. Trust Franco. He’s not going anywhere. He holds Elizabeth.
Lucas tells Julian, it’s a good thing Brad isn’t there. They’d be having a crying jag, Julian says Brad is tougher than Lucas gives him credit for. If Lucas needs backup, give him a call. Lucas says, Julian too, if things get tough. Julian knows there’s no quick fix. No move will make it easier, but Kim will be distracted in a new environment. It might help, and who is he to get in her way? Lucas says, something Kim said… He probably misunderstood, but when Julian was on the phone, it sounded like she said she was leaving with or without him.
Franco tells Kim that he’s glad he ran into her. She says she wanted to talk to Elizabeth. She decided to take Elizabeth up on her offer for the four of them to have dinner. He asks what she’s doing there, and she says she knows it’s her day off, but she came in to talk to Monica. She’s giving her notice. He doesn’t understand, and she says she thought Elizabeth told him. She was thinking of leaving Port Charles, and decided to go. He says, him too. They can go together.
At The Floating Rib, Jax says drinks are on him. Peter says, they played a good game, and should have won. Obrecht had the winning run. Jax says she was on third, and got greedy. You don’t usually see those kinds of collisions on a softball field. Peter says he thinks she was trying to impress Jax with her prowess. Jax says, who?
Obrecht asks Maxie how she looks, and Maxie says, like she just slid into home plate. Obrecht says, it would have been a glorious victory. She tells Maxie not to let Jax leave. She needs to freshen up.
Lulu asks Dustin, what’ll it be? He says, the winning team pays, but she says they made a bet and she lost. He says she seemed distracted when he was up at the plate. He thinks she wanted to see him at bat.
Hayden turns on the lights, and asks, where does a lady hide her treasure? She sees the painting Helena left Nikolas in her will. I wonder why she didn’t close the door. Not very professional.
Dustin messes with Lulu’s phone, and she asks what he’s doing. He says putting in his contact info. Maxie watches as Lulu and Dustin clink beer bottles.
Jax says Peter thinks Obrecht has a thing for him? Peter tells him, see for himself when she gets back. Where did she go anyway?
Hayden wonders, where could it be? It’s not in Valentin’s office, and not there. From the doorway, Obrecht says, two pairs of eyes are better than one. Tell her what she’s looking for, and she might help find it. If she doesn’t, Obrecht will turn her over to Valentin.
Robert says Franco took Cameron’s place, and Sam asks, what about Franco? Robert says Doc thought there was definitely the possibility of brain damage, since Franco doesn’t share Drew’s DNA. However, he was sitting up and talking. Jason says, and he has no recollection of his past life. Robert says, Franco thinks he’s Drew.
Franco tells Kim, let’s get out of here. She asks if he’s okay, and he says he’s better after seeing her. Her hair is different; he likes it. She asks if something happened to him, and he says nothing she can’t fix.
Elizabeth says she’s sorry she hit Drew. He’s right to a point. Franco doesn’t see her as his wife, and there’s nothing anchoring him there. (Was that a pun?) They need to give him a reason to stay. Drew says, let’s go do that.
Lucas tells Julian not to listen to him, but Julian says he has it right. Kim told him herself. Lucas says, so it’s not an idea they came up with together? It makes him wonder, if Kim was going to leave without him… Julian says, why go with her?
Kim says maybe Franco should have a seat. She’ll find Elizabeth. He says maybe she should find that loving feeling while she’s at it. She says, what? and he tells her that he said it to her before; remember? He does. She was wearing heels with a little black number, and he had on his dress whites. He grabbed the mic, and does she recall what she said? Tom Cruise eat your heart out. She says, Franco? and he says, hell no. He’s definitely not Franco, and kisses her. Elizabeth and Drew see them.
The show was dedicated to Fernando Pardo, who did scenic design for the show. See below.
Tomorrow, Hayden asks Obrecht what she can offer for Obrecht’s silence, Lucas tells Brad about Julian moving, and Kim asks what the hell is going on?
😢 Gone But Not Forgotten…
A behind-the-scenes passing at GH.
Patricia meets Kathryn at Gwynn’s to shop for party shoes. Kathryn gives the clerk a couple of pairs, asking for her size. Patricia asks if Kathryn’s new beau is coming to the party, and Kathryn says he is. They’re going with Austen and Madison. She thinks Madison is cool. Patricia says Madison never meant to hurt Danni. Shep pushed her too far, and was surprised when she stood up for herself. Kathryn says, Shep has an intense anger about something outside of Madison and Austen. Patricia says years ago, Shep told Madison that when she got a divorce, call him first. She doesn’t know if he resents her being with Austen. She observes that Kathryn’s shoes have spikes on them, and says Kathryn could kick someone in the ass with those. Kathryn says she should have worn them to the fox hunt. Ashley, let’s talk. Patricia heard Ashley was there, and asks what she said. Kathryn says, it was weird. Ashley talked about how she was so sorry for what she’d said, that it wasn’t her place. She said she respects Kathryn, and wants things to be good between them. Kathryn tries on shoes, and picks out a pair. Patricia says after Ashley and Kathryn talked, Shep overheard Ashley saying to her friends, Kathryn will never get custody of the children. Kathryn says Ashley makes her sick, and Patricia says that’s why she’s not buying the new Ashley, who wants to be pals with everybody. Kathryn says she doesn’t buy it for a second. Patricia thinks Ashley is vindictive, and will do anything get back at her. She’s given Ashley her rough time on social media. In Patricia’s interview, she says she turned against Ashley when Ashely started cyber-bullying her on social media, and defaming her. She’s not a shrinking violet, and Ashley is ill-equipped for that kind of warfare with her. She says Ashley is ballsy and shameless. Kathryn says, shameless is right.
Bailey visits Austen, bearing lattes. He says it’s the longest he’s been at a place. She says, coffee cheers, and asks, what’s new? He wishes they’d had a chance to talk at the fox hunt. She says she saw him with Shep. He says, maybe a little hiatus will be good. She tells him that she’s going to Patricia’s party, and he says, with Shep? She says, no, and he asks who Shep is taking. She makes a face.
Shep goes to Chelsea’s salon for a haircut. He tells her that his date for the party is named Chelsea as well. She’s the girl on the couch when Madison barged into Austen’s. We flash back to that. He says he begged Craig to take the other girl, who’s also in town. Chelsea asks how Austen feels about that, and Shep says he’s taking a step back. She asks how Austen is taking it, and he says, who cares? In Chelsea’s interview, she feels Shep’s been fighting hard to show that Madison is a horrible person, but at the end of day, she and Austen are together. Shep feels like he lost battle. Why he cares so much, she doesn’t know. She asks if he’s ever been with Madison, and he says, no. She asks if he tried, and he says he has a vague memory of thinking he could bang her. We flash back to a party four years ago, where Madison told Shep, don’t get any ideas. He says he’s glad it didn’t work out. She’ll never taste mom’s meatloaf.
Austen asks if he knows her, and Bailey says, yes. He asks, how? and Bailey says, she was there; Chelsea. Austen says, see what he means? Shep has no shame. Bailey says, Shep must have a relationship with her if he’s bringing her. Austen says, it’s called a booty call. He hopes Madison doesn’t get fired up. Bailey asks if he’s going to tell her, and he says he has to. In Austen’s interview, he says Shep claims Madison is a vindictive, revenge-driven person, and it’s exactly what he’s doing right now. He tells Bailey, this is sh*t.
Naomie’s mom Carole helps her paint the bathroom. Carole says Naomie is always busy, and Naomie says Carole always calls at the worst time when she’s working. Carole say she works with Naomie’s dad, and Naomie says she could never work with her dad. Carole says he couldn’t work with her either; she’s so opinionated. Naomie wonders why she’s like this, if her mom is so sweet, and Carole says she raised Naomie to have woman power. Naomie says, poor Metul. Carole says, they knew she could never have settled for typical or someone without their own mind. When they met Metul, they thought he might be it. It’s Naomie’s life, but she’s ready to be a grandmother. If Naomie ever gets married. In Naomie’s interview, she says she knows she wants to be married to Metul, but that doesn’t mean tomorrow. It can be the next day. They have tea, and Carole says when she was marrying Naomie’s father, another guy was trying to date her. The other guy was very handsome, and her dad was a little, chubby man, but his brain was tickling hers. She has to think, is she proud of this guy? Does she admire and trust him? Naomie says she wouldn’t date him if she didn’t think it could go further. She thinks she’s found a good partner in him. Carole says, that’s all that matters.
Eliza goes to get her extensions redone. Ashley walks in, and sits in the chair next to her. She asks if Eliza has any fun plans coming up, and Eliza says, Miss Pat is throwing a cocktail party. She says she hasn’t seen Ashley since the fox hunt. That went well. Ashley says her biggest regret was listening to Patricia, and siding with her and not Kathryn. She hates Patricia for doing that. She’s a POS. Ashley says she’s so regretful. She believed that bitch. She never would have said what she did to Kathryn if Patricia had steered her in the right direction. She was doing Patricia’s dirty work. Patricia was stirring the pot. Eliza says no one else has issues with Patricia, and Ashley says they see what happens if you go against her. Why is she the only person who sees it? That bitch called her a gold-digger. We flash back to that, and Ashley says she’ll never forgive Patricia for that. Eliza says she’s going to read Ashley some Bible quotes. Ashley says Patricia hurt her, and asks when the event is. Karma’s a bitch, and she’s going down. Eliza says she’s going to read her Bible app.
Madison calls Austen, and says she’s got a lot of work. He wants to tell her about his chat with Bailey. He says they talked about the ball, and he found out Shep is bringing Chelsea S. She asks why he’d do that, and asks how it makes Austen feel, but he says he hasn’t processed it. In his interview, he says Chelsea S is the girl who set up the video. Madison says he’s taking it better than she would, but she’s not surprised. Shep is a sh*t person. Austen says Shep is trying to get a rise from him, and he’s not giving Shep the satisfaction. He’s not going to run and hide. He tells Madison that they need to get their minds right, and should temper their drinking. Madison says she can’t wait. It’s just effing awesome.
At the Stag Party venue, event planner Stacey goes over things with Patricia. She points out the stag ice sculpture, shows Patricia the tables, and gives her the menu. In her interview, Patricia says, this year’s theme is a stag’s ball. It’s traditionally singles getting together to meet. It’s a European thing, and you can make it what you want, but even if it’s a casual event, she’s not lowering her standards. She tells Stacey that she’s going home to get a face lift and liposuction.
The girls gather at Kathryn’s place. Cameran sees the kids’ artwork, and says, it’s the best art ever. She can’t wait until Palmer is old enough. Kathryn says Kensie paints rainbows and hearts every day. They discuss what everyone is wearing. Kathryn says she’s glad they came over; it feels like a salon. She tells them a stylist is coming, and Hunter will be coming to the party. She says she calls him chicken nugget, and he calls her his honey mustard. Cameran sees that Naomie is wearing a promise ring, and says, the next one is a diamond. Kathryn says a friend overheard Ashley talking to Eliza at the salon, and Ashley said she was coming tonight. She’s going to climb that gate like, what up? We find out Metul and Jason are also coming, and Kathryn says she and Hunter are going with Madison and Austen. Cameron asks if Madison has apologized to Danni, but Danni doesn’t want to talk about it anymore. She wants a day to not talk about them. Kathryn says they’re going to see them tonight, and Danni says let her have an hour. She thinks it’s weird that Kathryn is going with them. Kathryn says she didn’t want to make Danni uncomfortable, and Danni says she doesn’t understand how Kathryn can allow Austen to be buddy-buddy with her. In Danni’s interview, she says, what Austen said was unwarranted, unfair, and mean. Her best friend should recognize that before anyone else. Kathryn says now she sees that it’s screwed up. She’s not going with them. She says she’ll text him, and Naomie says, that’s a real friend. Danni says she doesn’t have to, but Kathryn says she wants to. Danni is more important. On a better note, let’s have fun and be normal people. Naomie asks who Shep is going with, and Chelsea says, another Chelsea. She was involved in the threesome video.
Everyone gets ready. Austen suggests he and Madison skip the party. In his interview, Austen says he’s glad he reconfirmed his decision to go with his heart, rather than his drinking buddy. He’s finally doing what he wants to do. He fumbles around, trying to put Madison’s anklet on her, says he can’t, then gets it. He tells her, that’s love.
No surprise, the party looks glorious. A beautiful showgirl on stilts welcomes the guests outside, and there’s a purple carpet to walk. A contortionist does moves on a table inside, and there’s elegance galore. As she walks in, Chelsea says, fancy. Patricia introduces Chelsea to Mr. Kale, her bodyguard. She says, he’s security; she doesn’t want replay of last year. We flash back to Ashley calling Kathryn an egg donor. In Patricia’s interview, she explains that Mr. Kale owns a security company, and packs heat. Is that… yes it is. Jason. We never see him. Cameran sees the entrance, and says, this is extra. Whitney says, Jason made a guest appearance, and Chelsea says she heard the rumors. Kathryn arrives with Hunter, who’s really cute. Kathryn is wearing one of those dresses with a sheer bottom that I love. She suggests Hunter jam with Whitney, and Whitney says he shreds metal. We see a clip of that. Danni and Bailey come in together. Jason and Metul talk. Cameran is loving it, and says Metul smells good, getting into his personal space. Naomie says he’s being assaulted, but he says, it’s not assault if it’s welcome.
In the car, Madison feels sick. Austen tells her, rebound. They got this. She says she’s trying to be positive, and he takes her hand. She says she feels bad for anyone coming after her, but he doesn’t think anyone is dumb enough to do that. He kisses her, and tells her that he loves her before they go in.
Shep says, it’s gonna be fun; he’s into it. He’s also done in my book. I always thought of Shep as someone I’d never want to date, but would make a great friend. This is as immature and mean as it gets. I’m so disappointed. He has no business doing this to Austen just because he doesn’t like Austen’s choices. He’s being an insecure, arrogant pr*ck. Madison made a big mistake, but I think she exploded after taking his crap for a while. I’m not excusing it, because it involved Danni, as innocent a bystander as it gets, but Madison does not deserve this treatment. And while Austen shouldn’t have given her the ammo, Shep needs to face it – your dude friends tell their girlfriends the gossip you give them. An ex of mine couldn’t get to the phone fast enough when a mutual acquaintance told him something and said not to tell me.
Cameran tells Jason that Metul is her man crush. Austen and Madison come in, and Patricia and Whitney greet them. Shep and Craig follow. Kathryn points out the contortionist, who is now in a giant champagne glass. Chelsea bets she’s good in the sack. Shep is all excited, and I wish I could punch him. Craig is with Michelle, the other chick in the video. Austen says, it’s a total ambush. In his interview, he says, Craig is such a pawn. Cameran greets Shep and Craig. Austen says, this is total bullsh*t, but Madison says, it’s okay. Chelsea says Craig shouldn’t be friends with him. Cameran asks, which one banged Austen? Shep says, Austen claims neither. He thinks if they’re so secure in their relationship, they ought to be able to be in front of them. Cameran asks if he thinks Madison recognizes them, but Shep doesn’t give a f**k.
Don wants to unload Eliza’s purse that he’s been carrying around all evening. Austen tells Madison that Shep and Craig have a nerve to come to this. He asks Kathryn how she and Hunter met. Kathryn jokes that she’s a concert ho’, then says it was at a dinner thrown by mutual friends. Madison tells Danni that she’s about to lose her sh*t. They go to a terrace, and Danni is gracious. She says, regarding what happened between them… and Madison says she feels like sh*t about it. Dannie says she was hurt, and still wonders why. She doesn’t understand it, and she’s pissed at Madison and Austen. Madison says she should have bottled it, but Danni says maybe Austen told her in confidence, but it never happened. She was caught off-guard. Madison says Danni was caught in the crossfire. She hugs Danni, and says she’s sorry.
Craig joins ignores Austen, and greets Kathryn and Hunter. Austen asks, what’s up with Craig and Shep bringing those girls? Craig says if his relationship is solid, it shouldn’t matter. Kathryn joins them, and asks, what’s happening? Austen tells her that Craig and Shep brought the girls from the video as their dates. Kathryn calls Craig a d*ck. Austen says he doesn’t understand. There were plenty of other girls they could have brought. Kathryn tells Craig, good move. Craig says he needed a date, but he already knows what a big loser he is. Austen says he should call Shep an effing clown. He wants to be king, and make Craig a pawn. Kathryn says, he plays checkers actually.
Cameran tells Shep, of all the girls… and Shep asks if she doesn’t find the humor in it. She does, but at the same time. if he values his friendship with Austen… Shep says he doesn’t right now. She says, Austen is obviously happy. Why does he care? Shep says, it’s one of the biggest romances in history; everybody knows it. Cameran isn’t having it. Craig tells Austen and Kathryn, he never met her until tonight. Shep said she was a hookup from his past. Austen says Shep brought them specifically to slap him in the face. He knows that, but then Craig brings the other girl. How can Craig question that? In Craig’s interview, he admits he’s kind of being an a-hole. He didn’t really care about taking a swing at Madison and Austen, and now he feels bad that he got involved. He tells Austen that he thinks Shep doesn’t like seeing other people happy. Cameran asks if Shep is jealous because Madison and Austen are in love. Shep says, Austen is a real lucky man. Cameron tells him, she’s just saying, and Shep says if he could only find himself a Madison. Is she effing nuts?
Cameran stuffs her face. Patricia thought Whitney was going to shave. Chelsea thinks they should set the record straight, and Kathryn says they want to know if either of the girls screwed Austen. Chelsea goes up to Michelle and Chelsea S, and asks if they can talk really quick. She leaves with them to a more private spot, and the others follow. Austen asks to talk to Shep. Chelsea tells the two girls that everyone wants to know the truth. Cameran says Shep is using them to get back at Austen. Michelle says, that’s fine. It has nothing to do with what they’re doing; they’re just having fun. Chelsea S says they were hanging out, and passed out. Kathryn asks, did ya’ll screw him? and Chelsea S says there was nothing sexual. She woke up on the couch, and hears that crazy bitch screaming. Chelsea says she wouldn’t call Madison that, and Chelsea S admits she’d be crazy too. Cameran asks why she filmed it, and Michelle says they didn’t know what was going to happen with Madison screaming. Chelsea says, so the moral of the story is, neither one of them screwed Austen? They both say, no.
Austen tells Shep, be honest; what’s going on? Shep says Patricia was having a party, and he invited Chelsea. She’s one of the few people he could bring, and he thought it was funny. Austen says it was a slap in the face, and Shep did it to get a rise. Shep knows it was. Shep says, yeah, and drinks directly out of a wine (?) bottle. Austen says Shep is being petty. Shep says it was snippy and bad, but he’s not dying on the cross for Austen. It’s what Austen wants. Austen asks why he’s so angry. Shep sarcastically says he’s trying to destroy Austen, and Austen says Shep is mad at someone else, not him. It’s disappointing. Craig wonders in, and Austen tells him, eff off please. Craig doesn’t even hesitate, and turns right around. That, and the look on Craig’s face, make me literally lol. Shep says, sometimes a little revolution is a good thing, as usual, not even knowing what the hell he’s talking about. He says he’s not stopping the love story of the century, against all odds. They can go riding into the sunset. It’s called disassociation. In his interview, Austen says, Shep took the words right out of his mouth. The friendship is in total ruins. Don’t let the door hit him on the way out. Austen tells Shep that he’s got it. They go back to the party. BTW, Shep is also getting fat. There, I said it.
Cameran says if Ashley comes, she’ll give her credit. Whitney says it would take audacity and balls to walk into this viper’s pit. Shep sees Craig on the stairs. Craig says he’s kind of hiding, and Shep asks what’s up. wha up didn’t know ploy inferiority complex she p knew didn’t know brag looks like doin I t for a point not because he likes her; he wanted to take a jab at Austen
Madison asks Austen how it went, and he says they screamed, they shouted, and Shep admitted he was trying to get a rise out of Austen. He says he loves her, and kisses her. Whitney and Kathryn see each other. They make a little small talk, then Kathryn says it’s all good, but she was embarrassed by what he said. He says he was protecting both their reputations. We flash back to him telling the others that he and Kathryn never slept together. She says it was already out there, and she thought people would shut up if he just admitted it. In Kathryn’s interview, she says Whitney isn’t that big of a jerk. He knows he hurt her feeling, and probably feels bad about it. There’s some insecurity there, but she can’t put her finger on exactly what it is. Whitney says she has a lovely boyfriend. She says she’s happy, kisses his cheek, and walks away.
Patricia tells Madison that Craig overstepped the line. There’s a double-standard there, and she thinks he and Madison need to talk. Metul wants to do a shot, but says he still has to get up early. In his interview, Craig laughs, and calls them lame. Because they’re acting like grown-ups, and Metul is working toward being a doctor rather than sewing five pillows a year. Madison asks if Shep would be willing to talk to her. He says he’s a man of reason. She says his date is real classy. He says she’s a girl he hangs out with quite often really. For three years, on and off. Madison thought it was more of a nighttime thing. Shep says it usually is, but sometimes day leads into the night.
Madison says she’s going to tell him this one time only. She apologizes for saying what she said. It was inappropriate, and she crossed the line. She’s disappointed n herself, and not proud of how she made everyone feel. He thanks her, and she says Austen does value his friendship. She doesn’t want to feel like they can’t get back to where they were. She feels like Shep thinks they never will, and after tonight, probably Austen feels the same way. Shep says he doesn’t care, and Madison says, that’s obvious. She asks if he feels good about it, but he says he doesn’t care. Austen deserves it. She asks if he really wants to ruin the friendship, and he says he doesn’t give a f**k. She feels that Austen got caught in the crossfire of their hate for each other. He says he doesn’t hate her, but Madison says he did, He’s been calling her white trash from day one, and he didn’t like that she wouldn’t let him just say anything about her. She’s not taking it any longer, and she’s also doing it for Austen. Shep says he thought their relationship was stronger than a tire iron. They’ll be fine. What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. (Something people trying to hurt you like to say.) She hopes he finds that, and he says he will. He’ll find it somewhere amazing, and he’ll have a big-ass grin on his face. She says, alone? He says, of course not, but she says he seems to want to be alone. He says he really doesn’t care, and she says she thinks they should cut the crap. She’s not doing this anymore.
They walk out, and Austen asks Madison, what happened? Are they best friends now? She says, no. Shep asks if his date is having a good time, and asks if she ran into any insanity. Austen suggests he and Madison leave. Shep tells Chelsea S that he’s not worried about anything, and nuzzles her neck. Austen and Madison leave the party.
Fifteen minutes later. Cameran tells Jason that she and Metul have a running joke that they’re in love. Ashley comes in, and walks up the stairs. Eliza is starting her goodbyes. Patricia asks Stacey if she thought it was a good turnout, and Stacey thinks it was great. Ashley walks in, and goes over to Patricia. She says she and her friend were in the neighborhood. Patricia says she sees that, and nods to Mr. Kale. Ashley asks if Patricia has a moment to talk, and Patricia asks if she’s met Mr. Kale. Ashley idiotically introduces herself, and Mr. Kale says he has to ask her to leave. Eliza says she told Ashley to stay away from the party. Ashley gets loud, and says she knows what Patricia did, and the truth will come out. Kathryn goes to Patricia as Mr. Kale escorts the ranting Ashley out. Ashley tells Mr. Kale not to push so hard, even though it looks like he just has his hand on her back. Everyone runs out on the balcony, so they can watch. Patricia tells Kathryn that Ashley isn’t bringing her cat on hot trailer roof drama to this event. Kathryn can’t believe she showed up.
Outside, Ashley calls Thomas, and says they embarrassed her. The guy was pushing her down the stairs, and she was wearing heels. It was aggressive. It was so messed up. She says, okay, and hangs up. She tells her friend that he told her to call 911, Should she call 911? The friend shakes her head, while not even looking at Ashley. I don’t know if the cameras are distracting her, or she just wants to disappear. Ashley and the friend walk off. Ashley says she’s so pissed. Patricia says, it was the best money she ever spent.
One month later. We see a tweet from Ashley, thanking South Carolina for the life lessons, and saying she’s going back to California. She also has a new BFF – Landon.
Next time, the Reunion. My big question – why is no one mad at Shep, who apparently lied to Austen about Danni in the first place?
👗 A Southern Debut…
Good luck on your first reunion, Madison. You’ll need it.
🍭 Not My Thursday…
But I do love Nilsson.