Tag Archives: Lala Kent

March 19, 2020 – Lulu Is a Jerk, Top Chef Returns, GH Spoiler, New Beverly Hills, Surreal For Denise, Breaking Lala & Skeeter’s End


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Michael goes to the ELQ office, and asks to see Ned. Brook says, sorry. She doesn’t see him on the calendar, but she’ll see if she can find some time for him. Michael says she’s really good at this. She says if she’s going to spend the next five years waiting out her hella contract, she’s going to be the best assistant ELQ has had.

Carly tells Sonny, Nelle is so predictable. She did exactly what Carly said she was going to. She had her court appointed visit with Wiley, took a selfie to prove it, and came straight to the MetroCourt to wave it in Carly’s face. Sonny says, and…? and Carly says, nothing. She didn’t hit Nelle, or pull her hair out by the roots, although God knows she wanted to. Jason comes in, and Carly tells him, congratulate her. He asks, why? and Sonny says, Nelle tried to provoke her, but Carly didn’t take the bait. Jason says, good work; keep that up. Carly says, she’ll try, and asks if he’s there on business. She says she’ll leave them to it, but first, how’s it going with Brando?

At the gym, Brando hits the bag, and Spinelli asks if he minds if he cuts in.

Nina tells Jax, that’s it? Just no? He says, there are several reasons, and she says she’s not asking him to buy the Empire State Building. When she was otherwise occupied, Maxie stepped up. She went above and beyond for Crimson, and deserves a raise and recognition. Why can’t he give her the money she deserves?

Anna comes up behind Finn at the hospital, puts her arms around him, and says, hi, fiancé. He says he hopes that’s her, and she laughs. He asks how her appointment was, and she says her bloodwork is perfect. She thought she’d celebrate by going to the gym. He says, sounds terrible, and she says she wanted to talk to him about Violet’s birthday party. Has he done any preparations? He says he keeps making lists and gets stuck. How can he make sure his little girl’s birthday is perfect, when her mom’s not there to celebrate? Anna says just concentrate on her, her favorite things, her favorite color. She asks what that is, and he says, purple, obviously. Anna puts it in her phone and says she’ll order purple party decorations; nothing understated, the full swag.

Lulu says Maxie isn’t going to believe what Brook just posted on Facebook. Skootch. They sit closer together, and Lulu says, Brook just posted a video of her desk at ELQ. Maxie says they do that at Crimson for promotional stuff. It’s kind of cute Brook is excited. Lulu says, forget the cuteness. Look. Maxie gasps.

Peter comes in, and Robert says, working late? Peter says he is, and Robert says he figures Peter’s always got time for him. Sit a spell. He insists.

Carly asks Sonny how Brando likes the garage. Sonny says, he likes it okay. He wants to go back to Chicago, but understands he has to stay. She says, maybe once he settles in, and makes the garage his own, he’ll see Port Charles isn’t so bad. She’s taking a snack upstairs, where Josslyn and Avery are showing Donna The Little Mermaid; apparently, you’re never too young to start watching. Sonny asks Jason if he was right about Brando accepting that he has to stay there.

Brando instructs Spinelli, telling him, try to target his punches. Spinelli apologies, saying, despite his glove and attire, his skills are better served behind a computer. Brando says he can’t let his aggression out on a computer. (God knows I’ve wanted to.) Spinelli says, too true, and confesses he knows Brando, even though there’s no way Brando could know him. He introduces himself  to Brando, saying, Damien Spinelli at his service. He says he’s good friends with the Corinthos family and Jason, and he’s aware Brando saved Carly’s life. He’s deeply grateful. It must feel empowering to charge in to the rescue, guns blazing. Brando asks if Spinelli knows someone who needs rescuing, and Spinelli says, as a matter-of-fact, he does, but they refuse to be rescued. Hitting something makes him feel less helpless. He punches the bag again, sort of.

Maxie asks Lulu if that’s a confidential deal memo under the paperweight. Lulu says, you can actually read the fine print. It’s a merger between an ELQ owned company and Mertin Med Tech. One of the deal points is closing a local facility in Port Charles. According to Brook’s story, she’s the only one who has viewed this so far. Maxie tells her, a good person would call Brook before anyone else sees it, and Lulu says, what about a good reporter?  

Ned gives Brook some things to file, and sees Michael. He says it’s a nice surprise, and asks if Michael misses work that badly. Michael says he was running errands, and thought he’d bring Wiley by and give him a tour. Brook tells Wiley, if he takes over the company in the future, pay more attention to the aesthetics, and update the hold music. Ned tells Michael, Brook isn’t a fan of the music, and she asks if Michael has ever been on hold. The music is great for insomniacs. Michael says he never noticed, but maybe he can take care of it when he comes back from leave. She says maybe she’ll get to first. She tells Michael, better watch out. He’s not going to recognize the place when he gets back. Ned says it’s nice to have the whole family back in business at ELQ.

Robert approaches Peter at the MetroCourt bar, but Peter says he doesn’t have much time to talk; he has a deadline. Robert says, it must be nice to be able to work anywhere, like in an upscale restaurant. Peter says, it has its perks. Robert wonders what Peter is going to order, and says, there’s nothing like the taste of freedom. Peter asks Robert what his point is, and Robert says he just came from a meeting with Obrecht. Peter asks if she’s still claiming she’s innocent, and Robert tells him, she says Peter is the one who’s responsible for killing Drew, and sending the assassin after Andre and Franco. Peter says, it’s so sad, the lengths Obrecht will go to destroy him. Robert says he thought they had a truce, and Peter says, so did he. That’s why he hired her to write a column for The Invader. She had him fooled. She must have been trying to get him to lower his guard. Robert says, imagine if she’d framed Peter for her crimes. That means Obrecht would be sitting there tonight.

Anna goes over things for Violet’s birthday party with Finn; the guest list, balloons, games, party favors. Finn says he thought showering Violet with gifts would be enough. Anna says if he thinks this is too much, wait until they plan their wedding. He says, right, the wedding. She says it’s been almost a year since he gave her the ring, and they don’t have a date. It’s fine, but she feels like they’re dancing around the subject. She knows she’s been gone a while, and that didn’t make it any easier, but she’s here now. She’s happy he and Violet have moved back in. Finn says they’re happy too, and she says she was wondering if the three of them will be moving forward together. He says he thought that’s what they were doing, and she says, it is, but are they moving forward like they are now, or as a married couple?

Peter tells Robert, it looks like justice prevailed, and Robert says, it depends on your definition of justice. Olivia asks if Robert is harassing her customers again. He says only because it encourages her to come by and stop him. Peter says he has to get to work, and gets up to move to a table. Robert tells him, enjoy his meal. Olivia asks what she interrupted, and Robert says, it’s nothing to worry about. She asks if he has time for her, and he says, absolutely. What’s on her mind? She says, it’s been a month since she’s heard from the WSB. Does he have any news about Dante?

Nina tells Jax, Aurora has millions. How hard can it be to pad the budget to keep her best employee happy? Jax says he thought the reason of Crimson’s autonomy was to keep him away it the first place. She says, okay, Mr. CEO. Give her the money she wants, and she’ll leave him alone. He asks if that’s what it boils down to, and she asks what he means. He says, the reason he can’t give her the money is her.

Maxie tells Lulu, she’s not a fan of Brook’s, but reporting this could mess things up. Lulu asks why she should feel bad about that, and Maxie says, she wouldn’t just be messing things up for Brook, but for ELQ and the Quartermaines, some of whom are Lulu’s former in-laws. Lulu says, technically, she’s not doing anything wrong by reporting a data breach. Brook took the video, and if she didn’t want it to go viral, she shouldn’t have hit post. Maxie says, a lot of people they love work for and with ELQ, but Lulu says, none of them are Brook. Maxie says, it’s Lulu’s call. Lulu looks over at Peter’s table, and says, actually, it’s Peter’s. She’ll be right back.

Brook answers the phone, and says, Mr. Quartermaine is in a meeting. Can she take a message? She says she’ll totally squeeze them in asap. She plays with Wiley, who’s sitting in his stroller.

Michael asks if Ned has heard anything, and Ned says the contract was prepared, and sent out for Llewellyn’s signature. They’re keeping the merger quiet until it’s finalized. Michael says he doesn’t envy Ned when it goes public. Nobody is going to like the anticipated layoffs. Ned says he’ll spin it. It will be great news for the shareholders. Michael thanks Ned for picking up the slack. He obviously left the company in good hands.

Spinelli tells Brando, a woman near and dear to his heart has moved in with a dangerous man. Brando asks, how dangerous? and Spinelli says, he’s done despicable things, both in the past and the present. While the lady involved believes his criminal past is behind him, Spinelli knows he’s in as deep as ever. Brando asks if Spinelli has proof, but Spinelli says, he’s a master of deceit. Spinelli doesn’t know if he should respect her wishes, and leave them alone, or fight to protect her from harm and heartbreak.

Jason tells Sonny, Brando’s not happy, but he knows he’s not going anywhere. He had his first customer while Jason was there. Willow’s mom Harmony said she needed work on her car; a 2019 model, fresh off the lot. Sonny asks if he’s concerned, and Jason says he checked with Willow. Harmony is living in a halfway house, and working as an aid at Turning Woods. Sonny says, no way she could afford a new car. Jason says, at first Harmony was friendly, but then she got nervous. She said she was going to take the car back to the dealer, but he suggested she let Brando take a look. Brando said there was nothing wrong with car.

Lulu tells Peter, she knows finance isn’t her usual beat, but a deal between ELQ and Med Tech? It’s important to the local economy. Not to mention The Invader would be first with the scoop. He tell her, go for it. His phone rings, and he says, yes, of course (🍷). He’ll be right there. He tells Lulu, nice job.

Robert wishes he could help Olivia, but he doesn’t know Dante’s status or location. She says it breaks her heart that her son feels he has to lock himself away from people he loves to keep them safe. They never got a chance to hug him. Does Robert still want to help? Some people have forgotten him already.

Finn tells Anna, he’d like get to married, if she still wants to. She says, of course (🍷), with all her heart. He asks how she wants to do it? A big church wedding, or something simple? Paris? A county clerk? She says, mmm, Paris. Although with a county clerk, she can wear a suit and carry a spray of flowers; no fuss or anxiety is appealing, but she doesn’t think it would work for Violet. He supposes Violet would like something big and sparkly, and Anna says she might like that too. He says, then that’s what they’ll do. They kiss, and Anna asks if Finn has any idea how happy he’s made her. He says, if it’s anything like how happy she’s made him, he has a good guess. They kiss again.

Robert tells Olivia, he can try reaching out to a couple of friends; strictly off the record. She thanks him, saying she’d be so grateful. He says, don’t thank him yet. It could come to nothing. She looks at her phone, and says, Mary, mother of God. He says, bad news? and she says, you might say that. She has to take care of something.

Lulu goes back to her table, and suggests they talk about Maxie’s big news; her well-deserved promotion. It took Nina long enough. Maxie says she’s gone above and beyond for Crimson, and it’s nice to finally be compensated for it. Lulu says she deserves all this and more, and Maxie thanks Lulu for encouraging her to do it. She can’t stop thinking about all the projects, and the photo shoots she’ll get to arrange. Lulu says it calls for a celebration, but Maxie asks if it can wait. She has an idea to run by Nina. Lulu says, now? and Maxie says, no time like the present. Order the champagne, and she’ll be right back to drink it.

Sonny asks if Jason thinks Harmony brought the car to Brando because Brando is connected to him. Jason thinks it’s possible. Sonny owned the property for years. Sonny asks if she asked about him, and Jason says, she mentioned them, but it made sense, since Jason was there when she showed up. But there’s something he doesn’t like about it, so he went to talk to Willow, who said Harmony was distancing herself. His guess is, Harmony is into something shady. Maybe doesn’t want Willow to know, but whatever it is it’s connected to Sonny. Or he could be overthinking it, and Harmony got a loan for a car she couldn’t afford, and is hiding it from her daughter. Sonny tells him, keep looking. He needs to know one way or the other.

Brando says, it’s obvious Spinelli cares for his friend, and Spinelli says, more than words can express. Brando says, if Spinelli thinks this guy can hurt his friend, he should follow his gut. Spinelli says it could create conflict which might be a negative in his domestic harmony. Brando says, not as negative as someone dying, and Spinelli says, this individual thinks nothing of eliminating anyone who stands in his way. Brando tells Spinelli, he’s got to step up. Better she no longer talks to him, than no longer talks period. Brando’s phone rings, and he says he has to take it.

Nina says, it’s her fault? but Jax says he’s not saying it’s her fault. He’s saying if he gives money to Crimson, how will it look to the other departments? She says, because they’re sleeping together? He says, it would look like favoritism, and he doesn’t want anyone to thinking it’s a quid pro quo. She says, Maxie is a deserving employee, and he says if he could help, he would, but they have to keep their boundaries straight. Work is work, and fun is fun. She says, in that case, he needs to go. He asks if they’re fighting, and she says, oh yes, no, I don’t know. He needs to go, so she can figure out how to tell Maxie she’s not getting the raise she deserves.

Brook and Wiley are eating cookies when Ned and Michael come out. Brook tells Wiley they’re busted; she found them in the diaper bag. Ned asks, who’s answering the phone? and Brook says she can snack and answer the phone at the same time. She gives him a list of phone calls he needs to return, in order of importance. Michael tells Ned to keep him posted on the deal, and Brook tells Michael that Wiley is a wonderful assistant. Ned says, speak of the devil. Llewellyn is on the phone. He asks if Llewellyn got the contract, then says they didn’t post anything online… The Invader? He doesn’t know what Llewellyn is talking about. Michael’s phone dings, and Ned says he can’t hear Llewellyn. Olivia barges in, and asks Brook what she’s done.

Lulu calls ELQ, saying she’s from The Invader, and working on a follow-up to her post about the ELQ merger. She’d love to get Ned’s comments – or his daughter’s.

Ned asks how Brook could be so careless. That document represented millions to ELQ. Now that deal and the profits are gone. She says she was trying to give the company a little social media buzz, and he says, by posting confidential documents on the web? She says it was on her personal Facebook page. She never thought it would go viral. Michael says, it was an honest mistake; there was nothing malicious. Olivia says, that honest mistake cost ELQ millions of dollars. Brook says, tell her how to fix it, but Ned says, she’s done enough. They have to talk damage control – in private. Ned and Olivia go into Ned’s office, and Michael tells Brook that he’s blown his fair share of deals. She tells him not to try and make it better, but he says, Ned will take care of it. Tell Ned that he had to take Wiley home. Brook says she’ll watch Wiley. She’d consider it a personal favor if he cleaned up this mess for her. He hands her Wiley, and goes into Ned’s office.

Sonny gives Brando some coffee, and Brando thanks him for the garage set-up. It’s a nice shop. Sonny says Jason told him that Brando had his first customer. What did he think? Brando says if Jason filled Sonny in, he has nothing more to tell him. Sonny says he got Jason’s point-of-view, but he’d like Brando’s. Brando says, it was a new car, and there was nothing wrong with it. Sonny asks if Brando thinks she came to ask about him, and Brando says, it’s possible. He didn’t tell her anything. Sonny says he didn’t think Brando would, and Brando says he has nothing to tell. He knows Sonny set him up to keep him in Port Charles, and it wasn’t supposed to have anything to do with Sonny’s business. Yet Sonny’s business found him anyway.

Carly says she got Jax’s text that he needed to talk to her. What’s up? He asks if Josslyn mentioned their recent conversation, and she says, no; why? He says he offered Josslyn an extended vacation in Australia, and Carly says she suggested the same thing, but Josslyn doesn’t want to go. Jax says maybe they should reconsider. It might be a good idea for Josslyn to be on the other side of the planet for a while. Far away from the dangerous situation in Port Charles. She says he means far away from Sonny, and he says, yes.

Maxie goes to Nina’s office, and Nina says, perfect timing. She was just thinking about texting Maxie. Maxie says she has a great idea, and Nina says, that’s fantastic, but please sit down. Maxie sits, and Nina congratulates her, saying, as of tomorrow, her new title is Crimson’s senior vice president of creative marketing. She’s going to fly all over the world, meet fashion figures, oversee fashion shoots, and approve articles. Maxie says, and finally get the salary she deserves. Jax approved everything, right? Nina says, not in so many words.

Anna sees Spinelli at the gym, and asks about Ellie and Georgie. She asks how Ellie’s new job is, and he says she loves it, and Georgie loves her school. She’s made more friends already than he has in a lifetime. Anna suggests them getting together with Violet, and Spinelli says, if she’s suggesting a playdate, that’s a resounding yes. She says she’s planning a family get-together, and Maxie and Peter will be there. Jason comes in, and Anna says, perfect. She’d like to talk to both of them about Peter

Robert sees Finn at the hospital, and says, just the man he’s looking for. Finn asks to what he owes the pleasure, and Robert congratulates him on moving back in with Anna. Finn says, news travels fast, and Robert says he’s more concerned about Peter. Finn says he’ll always be concerned when it comes to protecting his daughter, but this was important to Anna, and evidence suggests Obrecht was behind Drew’s death and the attempts on Andre and Franco’s lives. Robert says, nice and neat, and wrapped up. He’d like Finn to do him a favor. Stay on guard when he sees Peter around Anna. Finn asks if Robert is asking him to spy on Anna.

Anna tells Spinelli and Jason, Peter and Maxie are living together, and Georgie is going to be spending time there. Children are susceptible to an undercurrent of emotion, so for Georgie’s sake, she wishes they would accept the fact that Peter has been exonerated. Dislike him if they want, but don’t treat him like a criminal. He’s not. Spinelli says he already had a conversation with Maxie on this topic, and he told her he’s doing his best to live and let live. Spinelli’s phone rings, and he excuses himself. He sees two unanswered voicemails from Maxie.

Nina tells Maxie that Jax can’t find money in the budget, and there’s no room to pay her what she deserves. It might be available next year, but in the meantime, she can give Maxie more vacation days, days to work at home, so she can spend more time with James and Georgie…  Maxie says, but no money for a raise. Nina says she’s sorry, and Maxie says she doesn’t understand. She’s done so much for Nina and Crimson. She’s covered for Nina so many times, and missed out on time with James. Nina says she understands, and understands Maxie deserves a raise. Maxie says, understanding it and making it happen are two different things, and walks out, Nina calling after her.

Lulu reads, Brook Lynn must be the most incompetent secretary in the history of secretaries – Clint Buchanan. She says, you got that right, Mr. B.

Coming out of the office, Michael says, Olivia will handle the press contacts, and Olivia says ELQ regrets the accidental publication of confidential documents, and is investigating the matter. Ned says he’ll get in touch with Llewellyn and smooth things over. Michael says they know where to find him. He thanks Brook for looking after Wiley, and she says, Wiley is a lot less judgy than some other family members. Ned tells Brook to get his PR team on the line. Never mind; he’ll do it. Hold his calls and order dinner. It’s going to be a long night. On second thought, he’ll order dinner. Go home and hunker down. She says she knows how to order dinner. She wonders what The Invader is doing on her Facebook page, and says, of course (🍷). Lulu Spencer. Why is she not surprised?

Brando tells Sonny, his mother lied, but he’s been transparent. He did prison time, but he’s cleaned up his act and made a good life. Anyone coming after Sonny, stands between him and that life. Sonny says if this is Brando’s way of asking how long he has to stay in Port Charles, he can’t answer that. It could be a day or a year, or somewhere in between. Brando says Sonny knows his history. If there’s anything he can do to help sort things out so they can move on with their lives, say the word.

Carly tells Jax, Josslyn agreed to be home schooled. She hired Josslyn’s favorite teacher as a tutor, and Josslyn can still be on the volleyball team. Jax says, with bodyguards, and Carly says, unfortunately yes. He says, she wouldn’t need a bodyguard in Australia, but Carly says, she doesn’t want to go. Jax asks if they can get real, and actually parent, and agree their daughter isn’t safe there. Carly says, it’s not perfect, but it works, and he tells her, stop putting a spin on it. This is no way for their daughter to grow up. She needs a normal life somewhere. Carly says, this is normal for Josslyn, but Jax asks if Carly hears herself. She already lost Morgan to mob violence. He’s not losing Josslyn to it.

Sonny says he thought Brando didn’t want to be involved in his business, and Brando says he doesn’t, but he seems to be involved one way or the other. If Sonny’s enemies come back looking for information, wouldn’t it be helpful if Brando tells them what Sonny wants? Sonny appreciates the offer, but thinks it’s best for all of them if Brando stays away from his business. Brando says he guesses that’s it then, and Sonny says, he’s afraid so. Brando says he’s going back to work. He’s got to earn his keep somehow.

Carly says how dare Jax use Morgan’s death to manipulate her; they’re done here. He apologizes, saying he was insensitive. He just wants to keep Josslyn safe. She asks if he thinks she doesn’t, and he says he knows it’s hard for her too. He doesn’t want to take Josslyn from Port Charles; he has plenty of reason to stay himself. But no reason is more important than their daughter’s safety. Can they talk as parents about how to keep their daughter safe? Carly says she wants things to stay the way they are, with them both monitoring the situation. They can figure out any changes they need to make together. If that means going to Australia, great. If it means staying here, great. But they need to make decisions for Josslyn together.

On the phone, Nina says, it could have gone better. Maxie didn’t take it well, and she could really use a friend.

Lulu asks Maxie how it went, and Maxie says, horrible. Lulu says she thought the promotion and raise was a done deal. She ordered champagne. Maxie says Lulu will have to drink it without her. She just got denied, and she’s going to get even.

Spinelli says, over his dead body, and jets. Anna says she knows Jason and Spinelli are good friends, and Jason has a tremendous influence over Spinelli; he admires Jason. She was wondering if Jason could soften Spinelli’s attitude toward Peter, but Jason says, he’s sorry. He can’t lie. He can’t pretend to believe something he doesn’t.

Robert says he wants Finn to stay on guard; nothing more. Finn says he wants to talk about Violet’s upcoming birthday party, and Robert says, he’s invited of course (🍷). Finn says, yeah, okay, but Anna also invited Peter. He wonders if Robert thinks he can be cordial for a couple of hours. Robert says he’ll try, but can’t promise anything. He tells Finn, eyes open.

Brook storms into the MetroCourt, and finds Lulu. She says, you bitch, and Lulu says she was just enjoying Brook’s Facebook post. Brook asks, how could she? and Lulu says she just reports news; Brook makes it. Publicly posting ELQ’s most top secret business plan? For a has-been, Brook sure knows how to stay relevant.

Tomorrow, Peter says he and Maxie are getting married, Nina asks if Maxie is entertaining other offers, and Anna asks Jason what it will take to convince him that he’s wrong.

👨🏻‍🍳 Top Chef returned tonight, and the chefs were in Hawaii for redemption. This season, previous contestants are returning to see how they’ve progressed since their last competition. The quickfire challenge was in three parts. First, the chefs had to break down an artichoke, and the fastest chef who did it correctly, moved on. The rest had to peel and separate and orange, with the fastest again moving on, and the last group had to shell twenty almonds perfectly – without a nutcracker. They then proceeded to split into three teams, with the three fastest chefs being captains, and were required to make two different dishes with the prepped ingredients. The one thing I learned, was that PFTS stands for, I got people for that sh*t, which one of the chefs said as he tried to break down an artichoke. I don’t, which is why I don’t make artichokes. Moving on to the elimination challenge, the chefs had to make a seafood feast on the beach, with no electricity or appliances – just their knives and their talent. They were to make three cohesive dishes, family style. Restauranteur Jeremiah Tower was guest judge, and pronounced Chef Gregory technically perfect as he got the winning spot. But poor handlebar mustache Joe (who I actually remember from a previous season) was out. As usual, all the food looked impressive to me, and I was craving blackened swordfish by the end. At this point in the game, there are too many people for me to even keep track of their names, but once they’re weeded out, I’ll be more detailed. It looks like a fun season, with the chefs going to Europe for the finale.

😭 Because Life Isn’t Sad Enough…

GH SPOILER ALERT. If you don’t want to know, don’t even look at this link.


🍸 Coming April 15th

But with LVP gone, what’s the point?


✈️ First Class Wasn’t Crowded…

And I’m already tired of celebrities giving updates on how they’re social distancing. In their mansions with their millions.


👰 Team Lala…

It broke my heart when Lala watched Brittany dance with her dad at the wedding.


🌻 The Friday I’ve Been Waiting For…

Finally, an end to this week. Shah you tomorrow.

March 13, 2020 – Cyrus Sends a Message, a Pool Party Goes Bad, Another One, VanderShade, World’s Fashion, a Rescue, a Promise, Ten Little Quotians & Perfect Ending


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Franco brings Elizabeth to The Floating Rib. Sam and Spinelli walk in, and Spinelli tells Sam, it pains him to admit it, but Peter did a masterful job framing Obrecht. Sam says, one might say she had it coming, but Spinelli says, in this time and in this moment, she shouldn’t be in jail. Franco doesn’t mean to interrupt, but asks if they just said Obrecht was in jail. Sam says, Anna arrested Obrecht yesterday, and Franco asks, why? Spinelli says, a plethora of charges, including trying to kill Franco.

In her cell, Obrecht shouts that she’s a victim of Nelle’s maternal guilt, and that woman needs a psychiatrist. Nina comes in, and Obrecht says, it’s so good to see a friendly face. Nina doesn’t look happy, and Obrecht asks, what’s the matter?

Chase and Willow walk into Charlie’s, and Willow says she swears Nelle was goading her on purpose. Chase says, of course (🍷) she was. Nelle is always scheming. If she can get you to blow up, she can play the victim. Willow says, so she should ignore her? He says, if possible. Try not to give her anything she can use in family court. The goal is to weaken her case, and strengthen Michael’s. She tells him that Sasha told her about Diane suggesting they get married, and she’s considering it. He says, Michael is too. Harmony walks in, and Willow asks if she wants to join them.

Julian says, Britt works with his son Lucas at GH, and she says she did. Although she’s closer to his son-in-law. Brad’s her best friend. He says she might want to find a new one. He’s facing serious time. She says she just saw him at the courthouse before they transferred him to Pentenville. Julian asks how he’s doing, and she says, at rock bottom. She can’t believe he kept Wiley’s paternity secret all by himself. It’s crazy. She’d almost say it’s unbelievable.

Michael tells Sasha, hypothetically, if they did get married… Sasha says, hypothetically, it could tip things in his favor with Wiley’s custody. He says he doesn’t want to pressure her into something she’s not ready for, and she says she didn’t think she was at a place where motherhood works for her, but then she ran into Willow. The thought of Wiley growing up with Nelle gave her a sinking feeling, and she’ll do anything she can to stop Nelle. And she can. If marrying him will help protect his son from that awful woman, she’s in.

Curtis asks Jordan, what’s going on? and she says maybe it wasn’t the best idea for her to see Cyrus tonight. She was more emotional than she realized. Her phone dings, and she looks at a text. Tell no one about TJ. Don’t want to ruin Aunt Stella’s visit. You’ll have a visitor soon. Be alone. She tells Curtis, ballistics traced every shell casing, but there’s nothing that tie it back to Cyrus. He asks if that’s all, and she says she told him, she shouldn’t have gone to Pentenville. Cyrus was gloating about killing Taggert without actually incriminating himself. Curtis says, of course (🍷), and she says, every time he said Taggert, she saw Trina’s face, and she lost it in front of him. She got emotional, and showed him that she was in pain, and she hates giving him that satisfaction. He tells her not to let it poison her. She doesn’t have to go back. It’s over. She says they both know it’s not, and asks him to take Stella out to dinner so she can decompress. Tell Stella his neurotic wife needs time alone. He says his beautiful wife isn’t neurotic. He’ll book Stella a room at the MetroCourt. She thanks him, and he says he’ll let her know where they end up getting dinner. If she changes her mind, they’d love for her to meet them.

Franco tells Spinelli, when Andre was performing the memory map procedure, they were interrupted by a gunman. Anna thinks Obrecht hired the gunman? Spinelli says, Anna was led to believe Obrecht hired the gunman, and Elizabeth says, by whom? Sam says, evidence. That’s what they heard. Sam says sorry to interrupt their night, and Spinelli says, apologies. They move on, and Elizabeth tells Franco, sorry. She knows Obrecht has done her fair share of terrible things, but she and Franco are friends. Franco says, there’s no way Obrecht hired the gunman, and asks if Elizabeth disagrees. She says, Anna isn’t one to act rashly. If she arrested Obrecht, it was for a good reason.

Obrecht says Nina doesn’t actually believe the heinous lies that are being told about her. Nina says she’s lost track of how many times she’s forgive Obrecht. Each time, she’s convinced herself she did the right thing, but Obrecht is making it harder and harder to defend her. Obrecht says she was framed by Anna’s devious son. Peter arranged Drew’s plane crash, and sent the assassin after Andre and Franco. And that conniving weasel set her up to take the fall.

Britt tells Julian, Brad adores Lucas. He’d never intentionally hurt his husband. She admires that about Brad. She doesn’t know if she would have done the same in his shoes. Julian asks, what? and she says, take the fall by himself. Julian tells her to just come out and say what she’s after, but she says, where’s the fun in that? She knows he was helping Brad. What made him throw Brad to the wolves?

Harmony apologizes to Willow for not being more available, and asks how she’s holding up. Willow says, some days are better than others, and Harmony says she’s grateful Willow has Chase. Chase say he’s doing the best he can, and Willow says, he’s been amazing. Harmony says Willow has her as well. Willow thanks her, and says she knows it’s been a lot for Harmony too. Harmony says as long as Willow’s okay, she’ll be fine.

Michael asks if Sasha is really okay with this, and she says, better than okay. He takes her hands, and says he’s lucky to have her. She says she’s the lucky one. He’s always had faith in her, even when she didn’t deserve it. His support restored her faith in herself. He’s a good person, and she’s stronger with him. He says they’re stronger together, and Sasha agrees. He says he’s not just saying this because it’s what you’re supposed to say to someone you’re marrying, but he loves her. She says she loves him too, and he asks if she could love Wiley. She says she already does.

Franco tells Elizabeth, Obrecht’s track record is troubling, but she’s always been there for him. She’s never judged him, even for his past, and she’s been such a rock of a friend; it makes no sense. She says the only one who can answer that question is Obrecht. Franco wants to go to the PCPD, but it’s their night out. She says they’ll have plenty of nights out, and he deserves answers. She tells him to go; she’ll wait there.

Spinelli asks why Sam cut him off, and she says he was about to tell Elizabeth and Franco everything they know about Peter. He says, the more people that know he’s deceptive, the better, but she says, no. Peter will feel cornered and desperate, and who knows what he’ll do. He could come after them or their families. Spinelli says he’d like to think Peter wouldn’t actually hurt Maxie or her children – not physically – but the toll it’s going to take on Maxie, knowing she trusted the wrong guy… Sam says she’s sorry, but there’s no way they can help or warn Maxie. If Maxie is pushed, she’ll feel forced to choose, and they both know what her choice is going to be.

Stella asks if they aren’t waiting for Jordan, but Curtis says they’re going without her; she needs alone time. Stella didn’t know her presence was such an inconvenience, and Curtis says, it’s not her. Jordan’s not up for company right now. She says, family doesn’t skip out when someone is struggling, like Jordan is. She wants to be there to support her. Curtis says supporting Jordan means giving her the space she asked for. Stella says, for the record, she’s still worried about Jordan, and Curtis says, noted, and they can talk all about it after dinner from the lovely room he booked her at the MetroCourt. She says he’s sweet.

Jordan sends a text. I’m alone. Now what?

Nina tells Obrecht, Peter changed. He and Maxie are building a life together. Obrecht says, one destined to be ruined, but Nina says, he’s not the same man. He’s actively trying to be a better person – unlike some of us. Obrecht says she’s committed many transgressions in the past. But while Peter only pretended to change, she really did. She didn’t kill Drew, and didn’t order the attack on Franco and Andre. Please believe her and help her. Nina asks why should she? and Obrecht says, because Nathan would want her to.

Julian says Britt doesn’t know what she’s talking about, but Britt says she and Brad have a very open friendship. He tells her everything. Julian agreed to work with him, then bailed, and worked against him. What gives? Julian supposes Brad failed to tell her that he was blackmailing him; threatening to tell Sonny that Julian was keeping his grandson from him. Britt admits Brad did fail to mention that. He doubts Brad told her that he repeatedly refused to listen to him, and sabotaged their plan at every turn. It’s Brad’s fault everything fell apart. She says she hasn’t seen Brad in a while. He’s completely lost his nerve, and is still concerned what people think. Julian says, that’s not a bad thing, but Britt says, people should live however they want. Why care about the choices you make? She sure as hell doesn’t.

Harmony’s phone dings. She looks at it, and frowns. Willow asks if everything is okay, and Harmony says, it’s work; she has to go. Willow suggests a hike on Saturday, and Harmony says, maybe. She tells Willow that she really appreciates the second chance, and she’s taking it seriously. She leaves, and Willow says, that was interesting. Chase says he didn’t realize Willow and her mother were getting close.

Michael tells Sasha, they’ll talk about any problems that come up, and they will because that’s life. Sasha promises to be honest and communicate, and he says he’ll do the same. She says, so does that mean… He gets down on one knee, and says, Sasha Gilmore, will you marry me? She says, yes, and they kiss.

Obrecht says, Nathan made them a family. If he was there, he’d want Nina to help her. Nina says he sure as hell wouldn’t want Obrecht to use his memory to manipulate her. Obrecht says, that’s not what she’s doing, but Nina says she’s done being dragged into this; it’s gone too far. Obrecht is on her own. Obrecht says, please, wait. She can explain how Peter did it, but Nina tells her, save it. Accept the consequences of her actions just once. She’s in a cell because of herself. If she genuinely cared what Nathan would have wanted, think about how important Peter is to Maxie and James. He’d want them to be happy. Consider that the next time she wants to tear their world apart. Nina calls for the guard, and leaves.

Diane asks Michael why she’s there. More Nelle shenanigans? He says he and Sasha have given some thought to the best way to fight Nelle. Diane suggested he get married, and Sasha agreed to be his wife. Diane says, that’s an absolutely awful idea.

Britt says, bottoms up, and she and Julian drink a shot. He says it’s probably a bad idea, but she says, who cares? Life is too short. No one hands you happiness. You have to reach out and grab it for yourself. Julian says, that’s awfully philosophical. Maybe when he was in his 20s, but he has a family now. She says that’s not what she heard.

Willow tells Chase, her mom is busy, and they mostly email or text. Chase says, letting her mom back in her life is a big deal, even if it’s in a small way. Willow says Shiloh messed with her mom’s life as much, if not more, than he messed with hers. It took courage to face it and break free. Her mom stood up to Shiloh, and she’s proud of her. She doesn’t want to waste a chance at a relationship with her. Chase says, if that’s what Willow wants, he supports her. He hopes Harmony lives up to her expectations.

😷 Here’s where there was a special report, but you know the drill.

Jordan looks at the picture she was sent of TJ. There’s a knock at the door. Jordan opens it, and asks what they’re doing here. Harmony says, Cyrus sent her, and walks in. Okay. Didn’t see that coming.

Franco visits Obrecht, who says he doesn’t believe this nonsense. He says, is it though? Is it nonsense? Did she hire someone to murder him? She says she’d never do anything to harm him. He’s her best friend. He says best friends don’t do things like hit you over the head at the pier, and she says, or put you in a position to get caught by the police. He says that’s what he’s talking about. Maybe they’re not so close after all. She says she never wanted him dead, and he says, except that one time she did. She says, not ever. He says, so when Andre was performing the procedure to restore his memory, she wasn’t concerned Drew might remember something that would incriminate her? She says she wasn’t involved in Faison’s demented scheme, but he says, maybe she was. Maybe her cover was blown, and she had to improvise. That meant destroying everyone who was in her way. Even her best friend.

Julian says Britt doesn’t know anything about his family, and she says Brad told her about his bumpy relationship with Lucas and his daughter doesn’t speak to him either. He says she really doesn’t care if she hurts someone else’s feelings, does she? but she says, she’s just saying what’s the point in acting like life’s a fairytale? You should take life as it comes; good, bad, and everything in between. He says she has a point, and she says she’ll drink to that. He says if she insists.

Diane says, the whole point of the marriage is to show that Michael can provide a more stable environment than Nelle, and can give Wiley a stable mother figure. He says, Sasha is a lot more stable than Nelle, but Diane says based on Sasha’s previous conduct, Nelle’s attorneys could argue otherwise. He asks who she thought he was going to get married to? and she says she may have been a little hasty in the suggestion department, especially now that she’s been briefed on Sasha’s past. He says, she did a background check? and she says, yeah. She wants to beat Nelle’s lawyers to the punch, and needs the full picture before the custody hearing. She was unaware of how untruthful Sasha had been while she’s been in Port Charles. Sasha asks if she would hurt Michael’s chances if she married him, and Diane says, unfortunately, she would.

Spinelli looks at his iPad, and says, there is no perfect frame. He’s going to find something to expose Peter. At the bar, Sam asks Elizabeth how Cameron is doing. Elizabeth says, he’s staying strong, but still has nightmares about that guy chasing him down and trying to kill him. She’s glad Jason was there. Sam says she thought the kids were in a warehouse, but Elizabeth says, they were. Then Taggert told Cameron to run, and he did, but a gunman followed him, Jason shot him before he could hurt Cameron.

Stella tells Curtis how much she enjoyed the meal, and he asks, what’s next? She says he doesn’t have to humor her anymore. She knows he’s worried about Jordan. She doesn’t blame him. The last time Jordan pushed them away, she was dying of kidney failure. Curtis says they learned a lot from that, and she’ll never keep anything important from him again.

Jordan says Harmony is working for Cyrus? How the hell did that even happen? That’s what I’d like to know too. Harmony asks if it even matters, and Jordan says, that she’s working for the head of a drug cartel? She’d say it matters a little bit. Harmony says she does what she can to get by, and Jordan says, why her? Harmony says she’s easily overlooked and dismissed. The crazy cult lady with the weird name. No one would suspect she’s working for Cyrus. They won’t suspect Jordan either. Jordan asks what that’s supposed to mean, and Harmony tells her, she’s going to be Cyrus’s person inside the PCPD. When shipments come in, she’ll assure the police attention is elsewhere. Cyrus will communicate through Harmony, and if she has a message for Cyrus, Harmony will make sure he gets it. Jordan says Cyrus thought this one up. Does Harmony know he has her son TJ, and he’s threatening to kill TJ if she doesn’t cooperate? Harmony says Jordan had better do what Cyrus says, and Jordan asks how long she’s supposed to break the law before TJ is freed? What guarantee does she have that TJ will be let go if she follows his orders? Harmony says, none. The only guarantee she has is what Cyrus will do to him if she doesn’t. She knows what Jordan is thinking. That she won’t compromise her morals, and turn the tables on Cyrus somehow. She thought the same thing. She has some advice. Jordan shouldn’t waste her time thinking. Cyrus is too powerful and his reach is too long. Until he says otherwise, Harmony works for Jordan, and so does she. Cyrus doesn’t want a trail leading back to him, so if she wants to reach Cyrus, she goes through Harmony. Jordan asks what Cyrus has on her, and Harmony says he offered to pull some strings so she could go with the early release program. She jumped at the chance to be near her daughter, but didn’t know the favor she’d have to do would be this big. If she messes up, it won’t be just her that pays. Jordan says Harmony is an accomplice to kidnapping and extortion, all while she’s on parole. Does she have any idea how big of a risk she’s taking? Harmony says, going against Cyrus is an even bigger risk. She has to go, and Cyrus will be in touch – through her. Jordan says, before Harmony leaves, she has a message for Cyrus. She needs proof TJ is alive. She wants photos of her son with the date and time, every single day. Harmony nods, and says she’ll do that. She leaves, and Jordan leans against the door.

Nina goes to The Floating Rib, and runs over to Stella, hugging her, and saying she’s glad Stella is okay. Curtis slides over so Nina can sit. Nina says the jetset lifestyle suits Stella, but Curtis is always happier when she’s in town. He says, he is? Nina says, he is, and she wishes she could say the same about herself and Obrecht. Stella says she heard about Obrecht’s arrest, and Nina says, unfortunately, she thinks Obrecht is guilty.

Obrecht says she won’t let Franco throw away their friendship, and he says then she has to give him something to work with; evidence, an alibi. She has to give him a reason to believe her. She says she can do one better. She’ll give him the person who actually did this – Peter August. He needed a fall guy, and chose her, and it worked. Everyone is willing to rush to judgement against her. She just never thought Franco would too. He knows better than anyone what it’s like to be wrongfully accused. She’s done things she’s not proud of. She wasted years of her life on Faison, but that ended when he killed Nathan. She’s a changed person, and didn’t do what she’s accused of. He has to believe her.

Diane says Sasha committing fraud is a problem, and Sasha says, even though she was never charged? Diane says she’s sure Nelle’s lawyers can find people who are willing to testify as to how she deceived Nina. That could badly undermine Michael’s case. Michael says, there has to be a way around it, and Sasha tells him, don’t. Diane is the only lawyer in the room right now, and knows what the courts will be looking for. Diane is right. She can’t marry him. Diane says that’s her recommendation. Unless Michael can marry a paragon – someone with good character, potentially Snow White and Mary Poppins all in one, don’t get married at all. She leaves, and Michael says, sorry about that. Sasha says, don’t be, but he says he wishes it was different. She laugh/cries and says they were engaged for all of fifteen minutes. Why is she so disappointed that they’re not getting married?

Julian comps Willow and Chase’s meal, saying he enjoyed seeing Willow take Nelle down a peg. Willow tells Chase, she may have thrown a drink in Nelle’s face. She knows it’s not very mature, but she couldn’t stand hearing Nelle talk about Wiley. It’s obvious she doesn’t care about him, and is just using him to hurt Michael. Chase asks how it happened, and Willow says, Nelle said something, then she said something back, then Nelle said something, and then she was wearing a drink. It’s everything he warned her not to do, but she can’t say she regrets it. He wishes he was there to see it.

Julian asks if Britt wants another round. She says she shouldn’t, but he pours it anyway, and she laughs. She says she has to visit her mom in the morning in jail. She definitely doesn’t want to be hung over for that. She told herself she was never setting foot in a jail again. At least she’ll be on the other side of the bars this time. But tomorrow is still some time away. She feels like letting loose tonight. She drains her drink.

Spinelli and Sam clink beer bottle and glass, respectively.

Obrecht asks Franco to tell her what he’s thinking, and he says he honestly doesn’t know. She asks him to chose to believe her, but he doesn’t think he can. She’s been a good friend, but she’s a survivor and it frightens him how far she’d go to protect herself. He leaves, and Obrecht looks really sad.

Jordan asks Curtis how dinner was, and he says it was nice. He thought she was going to bed. She says she can’t sleep anyway, and he says she didn’t even change her clothes. She says she got distracted, and asks if Stella is upset about not staying there. Curtis says, a little, because she wanted to help Jordan. Jordan looks like she might cry, and Curtis says he’s there for her; they’re in this together. She says she’s just upset about Cyrus. He doesn’t seem to have any weak spots. Curtis says, of course (🍷) he does. Everybody does. They just need to find his.

Michael tells Sasha he’s sorry, and she says, don’t be. He says, even though she’s not Wiley’s stepmother, Wiley is lucky to have her in his life. So is he. She thanks him, and he says he trusts her with Wiley completely. She says she trusts him, and they kiss. She asks what they do now, and he says, go back to the drawing board. There are plenty of ways to beat Nelle, and they’re going to find one that works for them. She says, sounds like a plan.

Willow asks Chase if he thinks Nelle will press charges for having a drink thrown on her. He says, anything’s possible, and she says that’s why she shouldn’t engage, but she’ll always stand up for Wiley whatever the cost. He says he loves that about her, and they kiss. He suggests they get out of there before Julian changes his mind. She says she feels weird leaving without thanking him again. Did Chase see where he went?

Julian is in the back room, crazy kissing with Britt. They get busy while there’s a song part. Didn’t see that coming either. Well, not until they started drinking anyway.

Sonny gets bad news, Jordan gives Sam false information, and Cyrus is surprised.

Shahs of Sunset

At Mj’s house, she says that life is baby laundry, nursing, pumping, feeding, and golden showers. The best gift she got is a peepee teepee, to keep Baby Shams from taking a shot at her during a diaper change. She’s focused on her incredible, beautiful, innocent angel. He is pretty cute. Nema video chats with her, and asks how Shams is. She says, he’s very well-tempered. Nema can’t believe he hasn’t seen her, Tommy, and Shams since the baby was born. He tells her to soak up much Shams as she can, but they should hang out. We flash back to Shams’s birth a month ago, and in her interview, MJ says if her uterus wasn’t removed, she was going to die. No one saw her or came to visit. It was like she and her baby weren’t important. Nema says he can’t wait to see her. In MJ’s interview, she says Reza’s favorite thing about pup Marti is how he clasps his paws, and Shams clasps his hands the same way. It reminds her of Reza, and it’s like a tsunami of pain. Her friends were anywhere but there.

Adam visits GG, and she asks where her cake is. He says he kind of ate it. She asks what happened after she left the cooking class, and Adam says, everyone was worried. In GG’s interview, she says the pain sharp, and we flash back to her leaving the class. We see a clip of GG calling the IVF nurse. The nurse tells her if she’s not having spotting, she’ll be okay. Spotting would mean she’s having a miscarriage. GG, Anita, and Yasmin go back to GG’s condo, and she goes into the bathroom. She comes out, and says, no blood. So should they party? She says she’s just kidding. Adam says the wondered if she could be pregnant, and in GG’s interview, she says that’s not the way she wanted anyone to know, and she’s not ready to tell them. She tells Adam that she’s already upset with Destiney. It’s like she has a new personality. She slept with Sara’s brother, and d*ck seems to be more important than friendship. She wants to talk to Destiney, but if Destiney comes at her hard, she’ll snatch Destiney’s wig off. Adam tells her about Reza wearing a piece of Destiney’s weave on the party bus going back.

Reza meets Sara at Aerial class, and says, it smells like excitement and regret. In his interview, Reza says somehow he lost his way, and gained some weight. If using the silks can help him lose some, he’s all for it. The instructor shows them how to hang upside down, which I’m sure is harder than it looks. Reza slides to the floor. He wraps himself up in a silk, and says he’s sure there’s a market in Iran. After class, he and Sara sit on the floor and talk. Sara tells him about two special agents knocking on her door, and serving her with a subpoena about her ex; his life is playing out in the media. In Sara’s interview, she says there’s a lot of media attention about her ex-boyfriend. Reza asks who the hell her ex-boyfriend is, and she says, Robert Kelly. They met in 2013, and were together three years. In her interview, she says he was charming and kind, and definitely not what she expected. Reza asks if he was anything like the person being described in the documentary (Surviving R, Kelly), and she says, no. It was an adult relationship, and there was never anything that was a red flag. Reza says, all she can do is speak the truth. She says she broke up with him when she found out he was sleeping with other women. In her interview, Sara says that he was having a party in Chicago, and told her, if she can’t be cool, don’t come, It was literally a full-on club; a happening. When a couple of women showed up, it hit her that he was screwing everyone. She watched the documentary, and the person she loved was a monster. Reza says she can’t blame herself, and she says she doesn’t understand how it’s possible. In her interview, she says that it wasn’t a perfect relationship. He was controlling, but she thinks her experience was different because of the boundaries she set. In hindsight, every small boundary and decision altered the dynamic, saving her life. Reza is glad she confided in him, and promises he won’t say a word to anyone.

Destiney goes wig shopping. In her interview, she says wigs are her thing. Hers was not a normal childhood, so maybe she’s living her childhood life as an adult. She chooses a wig that she thinks looks like a cross between Marie Antoinette and Elvira. She says, her first alter-ego was Rosie, who had a bowl haircut. She asks can she hide things in the wig, and the clerk is like, um… GG joins her, and says she didn’t recognize Destiney, who’s now a blonde. GG says she’s never worn a wig, and Destiney thinks she should try some on. She does, and says it feels like she’s wearing a helmet. She broaches the subject of the cooking competition, and Destiney says, it was intense. GG says she was irritated, and has been seeing a different Destiney than the one she met. Destiney was all about woman power and loyalty. Destiney says if she’d slept with GG’s brother, she would have talked to her first. GG says, maybe that’s why Sara is hurt, and they should have a conversation. In Destiney’s interview, she can’t understand why she’s pissed everyone off. Frankly, me neither.

Reza goes to a fancy jewelry store, and picks up a $95K Rolex. Nema joins him, and Reza says it brings a tear to his eye that Nema is getting his first Rolex. In Nema’s interview, he says, if you’re in the market for gold, a Rolex, or rubies, get a Reza. Nema’s life goal is to connect with his Persian culture. The next step in the evolution of his Persianity, is a gold Rolex. It goes gold, Rolex, Bentley, He says Reza is bougie when it comes to his Rolexes, and he and Nema’s tastes don’t line up. Nema picks out a simple $6500 watch, and the clerk congratulates him.

Mike puts together a wagon for Paulina’s kids. In his interview, he says he never thought he’d be with a woman who had children, and he wants to be with Paulina for the rest of his life. He wonders what he’s doing sometimes, and if he’s ready to be a stepdad. What Nema said, affected his thoughts, and it runs in his head non-stop. We flash back to Nema telling Mike that he doesn’t think Mike is ready to be a stepdad. Nema doesn’t get that Paulina knows Mikes strengths and weaknesses. He shares his insecurities with her, and he’s sure she knows he’s not perfect, but because she loves him, she sees he’s attempting to do it, and gives him a pass.

Nema meets MJ for lunch. He says she looks amazing, and she compliments his white teeth. He says it’s hard to see what happened to her and Reza. She says Reza claims she meddled in his marriage, and Nema says, instead of going to Reza directly about Adam, she went to Destiney; then Ali got involved. MJ says she had nothing to do with it. Nema says that’s huge difference from what Destiney is saying, that she was at the start of this. It makes her look like a homewrecker. Like she was bored in her hospital room, wondering how to eff up Reza’s life. She says she’s sure she wasn’t bored. Nema doesn’t want the perception of her to be like that, and she says that’s not her problem. It’s coming from people who are riddled with fear, jealousy, and lies. In Nema’s interview, he says both MJ and Reza like to meddle in other people’s drama constantly. We flash back to MJ and Reza springing Shalom on GG in the middle of a public event, and telling Jessica about Mike cheating. Nema tells MJ about Sara’s pool party that’s coming up. In his interview, he says, at the end of the day, Reza and MJ are better together. He tells MJ that she can come as his plus one. Thirty years of friendship is worth a conversation. She says she’ll think about it.

Destiney aka Veronica, who has shoulder length kind of blue hair, meets Sara at a restaurant. Destiney tells Sara that she wanted to go over some things. She did get Sara’s text about the party, and Sara says she hopes Destiney comes. Destiney thinks it would be super weird if she goes before they have a conversation. Sara says she’s not concerned that Destiney hooked up with her brother; it’s just awkward, since it’s not like a real love connection. Sam and Destiney are at different places in their lives. She wonders why Destiney is even talking to Sam. In Destiney’s interview, she says Sara can tell her this all day, but aren’t they all adults? Destiney says they’re planning on seeing each other again, and Sara doesn’t understand what she wants. Destiney says nobody is going to tell her how to navigate anything in her life. In Sara’s interview, she says when she and Destiney met, it was awkward. Now Destiney is hooking up with her brother. Sara says Destiney wanted to meet up to talk more sh*t, and it takes the soul and energy out of her. (I’ll have to remember that one.) Destiney doesn’t understand why Sara feels that way. Sara says she wants Destiney to come tomorrow, but doesn’t have the energy to care more. As she’s leaving, Sara says her brother won’t be there.

Adam tells Reza that he doesn’t know how to play Monopoly. Reza says, the game was made for Persians, and helps make you more successful in life. In Reza’s interview, he says he and Adam are doing better. We flash back to Reza confronting Adam about strip Jenga, and the inappropriate texts. Because Sara is having a pool party, he called a tanning guy to come and spray him and Destiney. He asks Adam if he wants one, and Adam says he’s in. Destiney joins them, and Reza asks what happened when she met with Sara. He knows she feels hurt. Destiney says she doesn’t hook up randomly, but doesn’t regret it. She and Sara had a powwow, and she tried to tell herself to understand, since she doesn’t have a brother. Reza says he wants details. WTF did she say? She says Sara wasn’t okay with it, and didn’t realize they were going to continue seeing each other. Reza says, she thought he was just going to hit it. Destiney doesn’t want it to be uncomfortable at the party. Spray tan specialist Robby arrives, asking, are they excited for tans or what? reminding me of a substitute dance teacher I had once. Reza wants to get alarmingly tan. Robby drops pearls of wisdom like, once you go Persian, there’s no other version, and the key to a good tan is drying as you go. In Reza’s interview, he says the spray tanning makes him sad because it reminds him of MJ. We flash back to when they got tans together. Robby says, the tanning has come to an end, and Reza says, he feels like he had a three-way. In his interview, he says he never imagined that on the day MJ give birth, she’d be thinking of coming at his marriage. It makes him feel sad.

Sara gets the house ready for the party, while friend Benny helps out. The DJ sets up, the food comes, and floaties are put in the pool. I’m ready.

Nema gets ready. In his interview, he says he’s the product of divorced parents. He’s had two separate Christmases his entire life. Awkward or not, he’s bringing MJ. All he’s asking is that she and Reza talk. If they talk, and still can’t move forward, at least he’ll know he tried.

MJ meets Nema at his place. Tommy brings in Shams, and Nema says they must be on cloud nine. In MJ’s interview, she says, what really mattered was her best friend of thirty years should have been there.

GG says she hired muscle, in case someone decides they want to step up to her. She’s more familiar with getting into a fight, and might forget what she’s going through, since it’s brand new. Destiney is a blonde, and GG’s bodyguard introduces himself as C. Destiney tells GG that she’s Cynthia today, and in GG’s interview, she says, fashion is expression, so let it be.

Sara loves the set-up, and thinks the bartenders might need to take a drink, since her friends are a lot. Destiney makes GG go in first, and Destiney walks in on C’s arm. In Sara’s interview, she says, Destiney is always like, look at me. Reza and Adam arrive, and GG attacks the food. Mike and Paulina come in, and Mike thinks Destiney looks like a character from Mod Squad. Destiney keeps getting her heels stuck in the deck, and GG says, maybe Cynthia isn’t feeling it today.

In the car, Nema tells MJ to absolve Reza, since he’s coming from place of hurt. He helps MJ put on her necklace, and says she has too much hair. She tells him, she has too much weave.

Adam jumps in the pool, trying to land on a floatie. Nema says he brought a friend, and Reza says he’s leaving. GG says she’s going too, and Reza says he’s not at a place where he’s ready to talk. The betrayal is in his heart, and he needs time to process sh*t. Nema tells him, don’t leave, and follows him, saying, a thirty-year friendship. Reza says Nema could have texted him. Nema says MJ has a different perspective; hear her out. GG asks how Nema could do that, and not tell anyone, and he says he wants to be peacemaker. She says ambushing people isn’t peaceful. At the party, MJ says Reza ran like a bitch. In MJ’s interview, she says, how dare he? Where does he think he’s going? And after she’s been loyal for thirty years.

Mike tells MJ that she should engage with Reza. Ali is the problem. MJ says she almost died, but she should go away? This had nothing to do with her. Out by the cars, GG says, MJ isn’t a good person. She’s screwed everyone who’s good to her. What did Adam ever do in all this? Nema asks Mike to convince MJ to come down. In Mike’s interview, he says he sees the issue from both sides. They need a therapist or a mediator. MJ tells Destiney, she can’t blame other people who aren’t there to defend themselves. Destiney told them that MJ told her to bring up Adam’s cheating. Destiney tells MJ, she never said that. She had lunch with Reza and Ali, and Ali brought it up. What motive would she have to say MJ told her to do that? MJ says she chooses not to believe Destiney, and Mike says, it’s too many years of friendship to waste on a possible rumor. In Mike’s interview, he says a sliver of him thinks maybe Reza is in such a dark place, because he didn’t have his friend of thirty years to confide in. He hopes they connect, and make sense of this craziness.

Reza goes back to the party, and MJ tells him to get away from her. Destiney says, it’s a thirty year friendship (should have done a drinking game with that one). MJ tells her, STFU, and Reza asks if MJ isn’t embarrassed. MJ tells him to go back to his stupid husband. They can cheat on each other, and go to the bathhouse. I’m not even sure if there are still any of those around. I think the last one in NYC closed recently. If you haven’t guessed, I’m a font of useless information.

It gets kind of chaotic, and by now, everyone has noticed, and is like, WTF? Destiney says she never lied, and MJ throws a drink in Reza’s face. He asks if she isn’t embarrassed, and now Sara says, WTF is going on? Reza says MJ has no shame, and she tells him, STFU, which is obviously her go-to phrase. Adam gets into the mix, and Reza tells MJ to screw herself. Go home and watch her baby. Why is she even there? Mike says it’s all he can do not to slap the sh*t out of Reza; WTF is he thinking? He’s talking to a woman.

MJ says Adam’s cheating has nothing to do with her. Reza says no wonder MJ’s uterus exploded, since she’s had ten abortions. I literally gasp, and say, nooo. I can’t believe he said something like that, and in the middle of a crowded party. Destiney says, enough is enough. Stop. Mike asks WTF Reza thinks he’s doing, and Reza says, f*** you people. He takes a binder out of a car (MJ’s?) and throws the contents up in the air, and the papers rain down. MJ says he’s an effing liar, and Mike goes after Reza.

Next time. Mike says it’s going to get messy, Tommy trashes Reza’s patio, Tommy says he broke a plant when he wanted to break Reza’s legs, GG says it’s the most agonizing twelve days of her life, and Reza tells Nema to butt out.

🎩 Pinkies Up For Round Two…

You can’t keep a good dowager down.


📸 Replacing Alcohol With Shade…

It’s hard to pick a side when everyone is behaving badly.


👗 Worldly Beauties…

Westworld’s red carpet.


💍 In All That’s 90…

Alexei to the rescue. I’m sure Loren must be very proud.


🤒 Going Viral…

Just so you know, the only Corona you’ll find here, is beer.

🎙 Quotes of the Week

Sometimes it’s easy to lose faith in people. And sometimes one act of kindness is all it takes to give you hope again. – Randa Abdel-Fattah

It is our wounds that create in us a desire to reach for miracles. – Jocelyn Soriano

When the whole world is silent, even one voice becomes powerful. – Malala Yousafzai

Until you step into the unknown, you don’t know what you’re made of. – Roy T. Bennett

When we give cheerfully and accept gratefully, everyone is blessed. – Maya Angelou

Anger, it’s a paralyzing emotion, you can’t get anything done. – Toni Morrison

The first method for estimating the intelligence of a ruler is to look at the men he has around him. – Niccolò Machiavelli

We are healthy only to the extent that our ideas are humane.Kurt Vonnegut

Health is the greatest possession. Contentment is the greatest treasure. Confidence is the greatest friend. – Lao Tzu

The great Western disease is, ‘I’ll be happy when… When I get the money. When I get a BMW. When I get this job.’ Well, the reality is, you never get to when. The only way to find happiness is to understand that happiness is not out there. It’s in here. And happiness is not next week. It’s now. – Marshall Goldsmith, American Author

🎪 No Surprise…

Of course this week would end with Friday the 13th.  See you in the Dead zone.

January 24, 2020 – Still Waiting With a Side of Updates, 90 Day Rewind, Donnalicious, a Real Peach, Wives News, Off Probation, LalaCast, GoT Redux, a Farewell, Nearly Ten Quotes & Have a Happy Rat Year


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

So what do General Hospital and the trial coverage have in common? General Hospital has been on for fifty years, and the same information is being repeated for what feels like fifty years. Seriously, when this is over, these people should get newscaster jobs. They also love to repeat things over and over.

The scoop (or as much of it as we have):


A message:


The spoilers:


This pretty much says it all:

💍 Catching Up With 90…

I figured since GH is on hiatus, and this Friday had a gap (I will forever miss you, Z Nation <sniff>), I’d give you the skinny on the latest 90 Day Fiancé couplings. I am obsessed with this franchise. So much so, I can’t even recap it – I want to take in every second. While I love all of the spin-offs (this could give Law and Order and CSI a run for their money, even put together), my favorite is Pillow Talk/Watch Party, where former cast members watch the latest show, and give commentary. The only thing better than watching TV, is watching other people watch TV. The original is back for a new season, and here’s where they are, in case you want to take the plunge.

American dude Mike and Natalie, a beauty from the Ukraine, seemed to be on shaky ground from the start. Mostly because Natalie’s method of communication is to bore holes in Mike with her eyes, and expect him to know what’s going on in her head. And what’s going on in her head is ridiculous. Mike went to the Ukraine to help her get a K-1 visa, and his time ran out while it was still hung up in the process. During a joint interview, where they were asked if they loved one another, Mike was quick to say yes, while Natalie hemmed and hawed, and said love would come as they got to know one another. Since they were already engaged, this didn’t exactly thrill Mike, causing Natalie to react like a petulant child. She literally threw the ring into his suitcase, but then ended up accompanying him to the airport when she didn’t get the desired response – which was that he should put the ring back on her finger, apologize (for what, was unclear), and sweep her into his arms. She ended up accompanying him to the airport, where she continued to bore holes into him until he left. This was definitely left up in the air.

Finnish lovely Jasmin arrived in America to meet with her fiancé Blake, and so far, it’s a match made in disaster. They have absolutely nothing in common (that I can see anyway), and even worse, Jasmin is a teetotaler/health nut who gets miffed every time Blake dares to have an alcoholic beverage. It doesn’t stop there though. Jasmin refused to get to know his friends, and answered all their questions with barely monosyllabic answers. The topper came when Blake’s best friend was having a birthday. They were supposed to go to a more intimate dinner with just the two couples and on to a party, but Jasmin begged Blake for a dinner alone with him first. This wouldn’t have been so bad if she hadn’t then refused to go the party, and decided to visit her sister instead, who happens to live nearby. I don’t think it takes a Sherlock to figure out there might be some ulterior motive here. Even the sister is telling her that she’s behaving badly. I would have packed this one back to Finland by now.

American born Tania and Syngin from South Africa would be a match made in heaven, if it weren’t for the fact that Tania is a self-centered twit. Syngin has it all; he’s good-looking, articulate, funny, and a hard worker. While he’s not allowed to have a job until he has a green card, he’s still proven his diligence by doing anything and everything that needs to be done, from garden work to revamping a shed for their living space on her mother’s property. A shed Tania was supposed to have finished by the time he got there, but surprise! there was nothing done. As a reward for being such a great guy, Tania took off for 30 out of their 90 days to attend a workshop on natural healing in Costa Rica. Since this is her chosen career, and they agreed it was an investment in their future, Syngin was cool with it. He wasn’t so cool with Tania getting sh*tfaced on the weekends with her classmates, and refusing to call him when she got back to where she was staying. It wasn’t even her getting wasted that he minded, although what he didn’t see was her also flirting shamelessly with any halfway decent dude at the bar. All he wanted was to know she was safe after her night out, because, you know, she was getting blackout drunk in a foreign country. Because her world revolves around herself, Tania failed to see how this was anything but being possessive and harshing her buzz. And even though Syngin had toted and fetched for her mother 24/7 while she was gone, when she came back, Tania was pissed that Syngin hadn’t investigated woodworking courses as she’d instructed him to. Never mind he’s in a foreign country where he knows no one, has no real money, and she left him hanging five minutes after he got there. My advice: Run, Syngin. Run.

Angela from America and Michael from Nigeria are back and badder than ever. I never thought they’d last, much less be riding the Fiancé franchise for this long. Sadly, Michael’s K-1 visa was denied, although it’s unclear as to why. This often seems to be the case, where the applicant is kept in the dark over important particulars. When a visa is denied, the couple has two options. They can appeal the denial or get married in the country of the applicant, and reapply. No surprise, Michael’s family is pushing for the marriage in Nigeria, while Angela wants to be surrounded by her family and friends. Michael shed real tears while giving the news to Angela, so she hopped on the next flight to see him. In the meantime, Michael also told his friends, who have given him grief about the relationship and had gotten in an altercation with Angela on her last trip, to piss off. This is when I started thinking maybe he actually cares for her. With the two being at odds as to how to approach the denial, their reunion started off on shaky ground. It didn’t get any better when, at a gathering of his relatives, their age gap (22 years, with Angela being older) became an issue when the subject of children came up. Michael’s uncle suggested that if Angela’s one remaining egg couldn’t produce progeny, he should have kids with someone else. Needless to say, this didn’t go over too big with Angela. It’s just one more argument in the long line that is their relationship.

American Robert and Anny from the Dominican Republic are a perfect match, just not for each other. Robert has a four-year-old son who he co-sleeps with, while Anny is more interested in another type of threesome. While Anny isn’t behaving like any prize, Robert also misrepresented himself, telling her that he’d buy her clothes when she got there and not to bring anything, and saying he’d take care of all her needs. If her needs were a small one-bedroom for two and a half people, and clothing from the second-hand store, then they were met, but her dreams were a little bigger than that. While their trip to a strip club for her birthday, at her suggestion and complete with a lap dance for her, was a little awkward; him taking her to look at an apartment, only to tell her he’d just signed a one-year lease where they already were, was downright mean. He gave her a give-it-time speech, but I’m not so sure she’s willing to wait. And to be fair, it’s not what she signed up for. I’m also not so sure he wants the stepmother of his son to be quite so freewheeling sexually.

Emily from America met Russian Sasha while she was teaching English in his country. They got to know each other so well, she was pregnant by the time they were on the show. Now they’re living in America, preparing to wed, and Emily has had the baby, but hasn’t shed the baby weight. Fitness coach Sasha has taken this as a personal challenge to get his family healthy, which I think is code for getting Emily to drop a few pounds. In a bold move, he started tossing anything he deemed junk into the garbage, while Emily wailed that the veggie chips were fat free. He doesn’t exactly seem too hands-on with being a father either, and did I mention he has two ex-wives who he also got pregnant before marriage? Sounds like a pattern to me. Still, I think this could go either way. We’re down to getting the wedding dress.

American Michael met Brazilian model Juliana while in Croatia. After a rocky start, and a denied visa, Juliana is now in the US. Another couple with a big age gap (19 years, with Michael being older), Michael has an ex-wife and two children. You’d think this would be a hurdle, but you’d be wrong. His children are a delight, wise beyond their years, and his ex has become Juliana’s biggest ally, even going wedding dress shopping with her. Juliana has also been married before, but it was more of an arranged situation, where she was mistreated, and she split. There was a shaky moment, where Michael suggested a prenup (he has a few bucks), but seriously failed in explaining it to Juliana, who freaked out because he’d dropped out of her life once before when she was still in Brazil. Wisely, he scrapped this idea, and we’re at the wedding. Since I read they’re in the process of adopting her niece and nephew, hopefully, this one lasts.

The one that already didn’t last was Anna from America and Mursel from Turkey. I would have bet the farm on this one at the beginning too. Drawn together online with a shared love of beekeeping, neither one knew the other’s language when he arrived to begin the 90 days. Her two sons weren’t thrilled, mostly the older one, but how could two beekeepers not make it? They were so cute together in their bee suits. Anna had picked out her dress, when she decided Mursel keeping her children a secret from his family was a no for her. She insisted he tell them, and the reaction was not good. During FaceTime with his mother, Mursel got honest, and his mother told him to come home, saying that Anna was no good. As if this wasn’t bad enough, he made it sound like he’d just found out, when he knew all along. When his mother called Anna a deceptive liar, he made no move to correct her. No matter how much Anna cried and begged, Mursel packed his bags, and went home to mommy and daddy. The worst part was, as he was headed to the plane, he turned around and came back to Anna. Both Anna and the viewers thought he’d changed his mind, but he had only returned for another tearful goodbye. I’m all for respecting one’s family, but he’s 35.


👧🏼  I’ll Have What She’s Having…

I’m using the fact that she was on GH to justify including this, but I swear, every time I see Donna Mills, I’m startled. She’s nearly 80, and doesn’t look much different than she did when she was on Knots Landing. Either she has one helluva plastic surgeon or miracle genes.


🍑 NeNe NewsNews…

Reminiscent of Flavor of Love.


They’ll have to pry that peach out of her cold, dead hand.


🏃🏻‍♀️ All the News That’s Fit To Run From…

Coast to coast Housewives.


🥂 Much Ado About Uber…

Publicity for LuAnn is a double edged Chambord.


💋 Lala and…

I love how she thought up a podcast name that could be changed just in case. Planning is everything.


✍️ Write Faster…

One of my greatest fears is that George R.R. Martin will die before he finishes these books.


🖐 So Long Mr. Lacey…

And my favorite Willie.


🗣 Quotes of the Week

We are all equal in the fact that we are all different. We are all the same in the fact that we will never be the same.C. JoyBell C.

The individual who says it is not possible should move out of the way of those doing it.Tricia Cunningham

Hey, fellas – stop manspreading. – Awkwafina, the new voice of an NYC subway train. And the voice of reason.

Always forgive, but never forget, else you will be a prisoner of your own hatred, and doomed to repeat your mistakes forever. – Wil Zeus

Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be content with what you have. – Doris Mortman

If you have a boy, you only have to worry about one penis. If you have a girl, you have to worry about them all. – Herb (Ryan Stiles), Two and a Half Men

I am not good at noticing when I’m happy, except in retrospect.Tana French

If you ask me I don’t think there are any such things as curses. I think there is only life. That’s enough. – Junot Diaz

Luck affects everything. Let your hook always be cast; in the stream where you least expect it there will be a fish.Ovid

🐭  Pay No Attention To That Rabbit…

It’s the year of the rat. Happy Lunar New Year!

January 6, 2020 – Nikolas Explains, the Captain Steps In, Returns, Past Cast, a Tease, a Transformation, Facetious Deck & Is It Something I Said?


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Before Nina can say her vows, the door bursts open. Nicolas walks in with Ava in his arms. He puts her on the couch where Jax tends to her. Laura says, oh my God, and touches his face, then hugs him.

Josslyn lights a 2020 candle, and tells Dev, happy New Year in Turkish. He says something back, but she says she only knows those two words, and he says, same to you. She gives him a gift bag, saying she learned that small presents were customary on New Year’s Day in Turkey. He says it’s cool of her, and takes something out. She says, before he asks, she didn’t buy them herself. Michael helped her. He says Michael must have done his research. A lottery ticket brings prosperity. She says, that makes sense, but explain the next one. He takes out a pair of boxers.

Cameron looks at the Christmas tree in Rice Plaza. Trina tells him, happy New Year. He mumbles something, and she asks what his problem is. At midnight, his probation officially ends, and he’ll be a free man. How does he want to celebrate?

Valentin asks Maxie and Peter to take Charlotte upstairs. Maxie tells her, it’s going to be boring grown-up stuff, and Valentin says, everything is going to be all right. Laura weeps, and says, it’s really him. Nikolas says it is, and moves on to Lulu, hugging her. She says, he’s alive, and Valentin looks at Nina. Lulu says she doesn’t understand. How is this happening? Nikolas says they have a lot to catch up on, and Lulu asks where was he? She turns to Valentin, and says Valentin was holding him prisoner. Valentin was behind this, wasn’t he?

Valentin says, no; he hasn’t been holding Nikolas captive. For three years, Lulu has been hounding him about Nikolas’s supposed murder, but he looks healthy. And Ava survived. Nikolas says, no thanks to Valentin. Valentin shot him and tried to kill Ava. Valentin pushed her over the edge of the parapet, but Nikolas was there to save her. Valentin says she’s drunk, and probably tripped. Nikolas says he saw Valentin. Valentin is always armed with an explanation, but not anymore. This time, there’s no way out. He loses everything.

Coming back from the skating rink, Trina says Cameron was impressive out there. He says she was too – by the third lap – but she says she fell on her face. He says, it was only once, and asks if she’s heard from Josslyn. She says Josslyn and Dev will be there at some point, and he wonders what they’re doing together. Trina tells him, admit it, and he asks, what? She says he’s totally into Josslyn, but he says he’s not. He’s known her forever. She says that doesn’t mean he can’t have feelings for her. He insists he doesn’t, and she tells him to prepare himself. Josslyn and Dev might be a thing. Dev is definitely into Josslyn, and Josslyn might be into him too.

Dev tells Josslyn, the boxers are awesome. He wants to wear them over his clothes. She says, that’s the custom in Turkey; to receive red underwear? He says, if it is, he hasn’t heard about it. Josslyn looks surprised, and he tells her that he’s kidding. It’s a New Year custom. He thanks her, and says when he was little, his parents would buy him funny red ones, saying if they laugh at midnight, they’ll laugh through the whole year. She asks if he misses them, and he says he bought her something too. He gives her a gift bag, saying, he can carry the Turkish traditions on in America. She opens a box containing a beautiful pen, and he says, for her journal. She says she loves it, and thanks him. He tells her, there’s more, and she takes out a pomegranate. He says, another Turkish ritual. If you smash a pomegranate on the threshold of your home on New Year’s Eve, you’ll have good luck. Josslyn suggests they go find a hammer.

Nikolas tells everyone, Mikkos made a codicil, and it was concealed in Helena’s portrait. Valentin says the portrait was destroyed, and Nikolas says, except it wasn’t. He has the codicil. He asks if Valentin can guess what it says, but then says he’ll do the honors. It says Valentin is disinterested. The entire Cassadine estate belongs to – wait for it – him.

Peter hands Charlotte her stuffed horse, saying, she was right. Electra was in the trophy room. Maxie says, PJs, check; teeth brushed, check. They could read her a story, but it’s so late, Charlotte must be exhausted. Charlotte asks if Peter can go downstairs to see what’s happening. Peter says he doesn’t know what’s happening, but he does know this. When he was a kid, big confusing things happened all the time around him, and he developed a bad habit of listening in. He found a really great hiding spot off the backstairs, in the hall closet. No one ever knew he was there. Looking back, he realizes that he was hearing only half of the conversations, making it much worse. Charlotte says, bad things happen, and Peter says, they do sometimes, but a lot of times, there’s nothing you can do about it. One of the best things he ever learned is that people are going to do what they’re going to do, and the best thing she can do, is let them. He knows she wants her papa and Nina to get married tonight, but whether or not that happens, he can tell her that they still love her the same, no matter what. That doesn’t mean the wedding’s not important. It means their love for her, and hers for them, is more important. He promises that everything will be better in the morning. Charlotte is already asleep, hugging Electra, which seriously chokes me up.

Valentin says Nikolas can produce any paper he likes, but he’s the rightful heir. Nikolas says, not so much, and Valentin says, it’s obviously forged. Nikolas wishes he could take credit for it, but it’s nothing he came up with. He can explain it though. The reason Mikkos amended his will to cut out Valentin is because Valentin isn’t his son. He’s Helena’s, which means he’s not a Cassadine at all. Everyone is like, wow.

Cameron and Trina sit on a bench. Cameron says he thought Trina was into Dev, and she says she was. He asks, what happened? and she says, nothing good. She tried to kiss Dev at the Halloween dance, and he gave her a polite, thanks, but no thanks. Cameron says he knows at least five people on his team who would kill to go out with her. She’s smart, cool, and funny. She thanks him, and says, but unfortunately, Dev isn’t into her. She senses he’s into Josslyn. He doesn’t talk to any other girls. Cameron says, maybe Dev is afraid he’ll slip up, and they’ll figure out who he is, but Trina doesn’t think that’s it. He says, what about Josslyn? If Dev hasn’t said anything, how does she know Dev is into her? Trina says she told Josslyn, and Cameron gets up.

Dev tells Josslyn that he had no idea the pomegranate would explode all over them. She asks if they don’t explode in Turkey, and he says he’s never actually done himself. There must be a trick to it. Josslyn says, there’s probably a how-to video online, and he says they’ll have to watch it for next year. He asks if he’s clean, but she says, no, and wipes his cheek with her hand. She asks if this means she doesn’t get good luck if they made a mess. He says, the mess has nothing to do with it. Smashing a pomegranate means she’ll be happy. He promises this year will be better for her, and she says, it already is, and she kisses him.

Josslyn asks, what’s wrong? and Dev says, nothing. She says, it’s obviously something. Was she out of line? He says, no; he just… She says he doesn’t feel that way about her, and he says he’s sorry. She says, don’t be, and he says, it’s just that… She tells him, he doesn’t need to explain. She got her signals crossed. He asks if she’s mad, and she says, no, embarrassed. He says she shouldn’t be; she’s amazing. She asks if they can not talk about it anymore, and he says Sonny and her family have been so good to him. He doesn’t want disrespect them. She says she gets it, and tells him, Cameron and Trina are waiting. I can totally get why he would want to keep his distance from her that way – she’s Sonny’s almost daughter. I’m surprised she didn’t think about that.

Cameron asks why Trina told Josslyn, and Trina says, because it’s the truth. Cameron says Dev wasn’t even on Josslyn’s radar before. Trina thinks it’s awesome, but he asks why she couldn’t have stayed out of it. She says she hates subtext; people not saying what they want because they’re scared. And Josslyn needs a number two to transition, and get her mind off Oscar. She’s not saying Josslyn is falling in love, but she’s moving on, and it’s a good thing. Dev is a nice guy. He’s not a player, and won’t hurt Josslyn. Cameron says if Trina wants to give advice, and go to college to get a degree in counseling, go for it. She says, if he wants to tell Josslyn himself that he disagrees, do that. Cameron doesn’t say anything, and she says that’s what she thought.

Valentin says, he’s Helena’s son? That’s rich, considering she hated him more than anyone. Nikolas says, that’s because he’s hers. He’s smart, evil, and calculating, and Helena was afraid of him. That’s why Mikkos wrote the codicil. He knew Valentin was a bastard, and didn’t want him to end up with the Cassadine fortune. Helena, with her endless games, made it a test for Nikolas. She had to overcome her own hatred and bitterness toward him, and look past it. Guess what? He’s a Cassadine, and Valentin isn’t. Valentin says Nikolas is spinning fairytales, and Nikolas says, they have happy endings. Lulu says, happy doesn’t cover it, but why was Valentin originally in the will? Nikolas says, it makes perfect sense, considering who his mother was. She passed him off, tricking Mikkos into taking care of him his entire life. It’s classic Helena. Valentin suggests Nikolas crawl back under whatever rock he’s been under. His mother and son fought his battles because Nikolas wasn’t man enough to face him. Now he’s made up a fake codicil. Laura says she needs to talk to Nikolas alone.

Maxie tells Peter, she can’t believe that just happened. He says, her and him both. She says she’s thrilled that Nikolas is alive, and Peter says she’s known Nikolas her whole life. Lulu must be beyond relieved. She says he sounds less than convincing, and she’s asking the same question. Where has Nikolas been? He doesn’t look like he just escaped a prison camp, wearing a nice suit. Peter agrees Nikolas’s suit is fabulous, and Maxie says Nikolas faked his death once before. Not that he’s worse than Valentin, but obviously, he’s not the sweet prince he used to be. Peter is the only person she can say that to. There’s no way she could say it to Lulu.

Nikolas tells Valentin, all of his lies are in ashes at his feet. If Valentin doesn’t believe him, ask Nina. Nikolas walks out with Lulu and Laura. Valentin says he noticed Nina isn’t surprised, and Nina says Nikolas is right. She knew.

Valentin says, now it comes together; why Nina invited these people who have no interest in watching them exchange vows. They all want her as far away from him as possible. It seemed off, but he was hoping he was wrong. Obviously, he wasn’t. You’d think he would have learned to follow his gut, not his heart, but he’ll always follow his heart when it comes to her. She’s put a lot of work into hurting him as much as possible. Is she done, or is there something she wants to say? She tosses her bouquet aside, and says she knew it was him all along. He nods and cries a little.

Maxie asks if Peter remembers a weird moment with Obrecht, and he tells her, be more specific. She says, when Obrecht brought up Valentin’s sordid history, she said something weird. She hoped Nina chose happiness. Maxie thinks Obrecht knew something was up. There’s the guest list too. Nobody there wants to see Nina marry Valentin; just the opposite. She thinks Nina invited them to watch her blow this up. She doesn’t think Nina intended to marry Valentin. Peter agrees, and she says, how awful to love someone and have them say they love you. To have them look you in the eye, and be lying about everything else. She can’t imagine anything worse, but Peter says, that’s the thing. Rotten people love too. That doesn’t mean Valentin is lying about loving Nina. Maxie says, Valentin is going to lose her, and Peter says, he knows.

Nina tells Valentin that when Sasha admitted she wasn’t Nina’s daughter, she knew he had to be responsible. She admits she loves him. She knows him, and he knows her. He’s the only person who would be able to find someone perfect enough to be her daughter, and get her and Curtis to believe it. She couldn’t figure out the DNA test, but Obrecht provided the missing piece. Obrecht says she regrets nothing, and Nina says Valentin took a swab from her mother’s corpse, then gave it to Sasha to give to Curtis, who he made sure came calling. When the test came back, he didn’t have to doctor the result, since it was from Nina and her mother. Valentin says, Nina… and she says, stop. Obrecht told her everything that she saw, and Nina believes her. All of this was a set-up; a way to ambush him, and make him understand. She can’t get through to him. If he’d told her the truth, he could have stopped all of this.

Nikolas tells Laura, Lulu, and Doc that Valentin shot him, and he flew out a window into the sea. Lulu says, thank God. Not the shooting part, but that he fell in the water. He says, it wasn’t fatal, and he started to swim. Laura says, it must have been painful, and he says, it didn’t feel great. A ship going to Pyrenees picked him up, and the crew got him medical attention. He realized how dangerous Valentin was, and knew he needed to be strong enough. He was almost fully recovered, when he found out Mikkos had amended the will, and Valentin would be inheriting everything. He couldn’t just come back and reveal that. He had to be meticulous; find a weakness, and a way to stop Valentin and reclaim what was his. He wanted to come back every day, and tell them how much he missed them. He hated what was going on. He asks Laura to tell him that she understands why had to stay away. Laura cracks him a good one across the face.

Valentin asks, may he tell Nina the truth? and she asks if he’s capable of it. He says, the truth is, he loves her. The truth is, his life is better with her in it. The truth is, on top of everything tonight, he thinks it’s just a problem he needed to fix. And the truth is, no matter what she does, no matter how badly she hurt him, she’ll never be the antagonist in his story. She’ll always be his love. And the truth might be, that no matter what he does, he might not have the skill to love her the way she wants him to. That might be the awful truth. Another truth is that he never manipulated her; not one time. She thinks Nikolas is more trustworthy than him, and Jax has obviously manipulated her since the beginning. Obrecht has known for months, and he’s the bad guy. He asks her to do something for him; one last thing. Think about who’s been using her. He walks out, and Ava says, that bastard just tried to kill her tonight. Why are they letting him walk away?

Trina tells Cameron, Josslyn just texted; they’re on their way. Cameron apologizes, and she says, for what? He says he knows she’s into Dev. It must be hard for her that Dev likes Josslyn and not her. She says she’s over it; Cameron said she can have her pick. She suggests if they’re still single when it’s time for the winter formal, they go together as friends, and he says, sounds like a plan. Dev and Josslyn arrive, and Trina asks where they’ve been. Josslyn says they got caught up at home, and they wish each other, happy New Year. Trina asks if they want to get their skate on, and Josslyn tells Cameron to show Dev where the rentals are. After they’re gone, Trina says, getting caught up at home is code for…? Josslyn says, the most mortifying moment of her life, and Trina asks, what happened? Josslyn says she kissed Dev because Trina said he was into her. Trina says, he is, and…? Josslyn says, he wasn’t.

Ava asks if Jordan isn’t hearing this. Valentin shot Nikolas, tampered with a corpse, defrauded Nina, and tried to kill her tonight. Martin says she’s a rambling drunk woman, saying, Ava’s vodka consumption earlier was quite impressive. He says, the accusation of corpse tampering, as weird as it sounds, came from Obrecht, who has a rap sheet a mile long. Obrecht says she knows what she saw, but Martin says, due diligence would be prudent here. Ava suggests he seek out somebody else for a retainer, because Valentin is going down. She tells them, there’s somewhere else she needs to be, and excuses herself. Curtis and Jordan exchange a look.

Laura says Nikolas could have come home. Spencer spent the last three years grieving. Never mind her, Lulu, and Alexis; they’re adults. Spencer is a child who has already lost so much. He let Spencer sit there and watch, while the man Spencer thought killed him, took his home and everything he loved about it. Where was Nikolas? Off plotting revenge? Really? She asks if he knows who else was plotting revenge; his son. Spencer goaded Valentin over and over; it became an obsession. Valentin came to her, and threatened that if she didn’t take care of Spencer, he would, so she put him in boarding school on another continent, because Spencer believed it was his duty to avenge his father’s death. She hates Valentin, and what he did to Nikolas and Spencer, but it pales in comparison to what Nikolas did to his own son. Spencer needed him. Spencer needed a father, and where was he? Plotting revenge for three years? How could he?

Josslyn tells Trina, it was so embarrassing. She kissed him, and he turned her down. So awkward. Trina says she knows, and Josslyn asks, when? but Cameron and Dev return. Trina says, no more probation, and Josslyn says she’s going to miss the orange vest. Trina agrees that it’s Cameron’s color. Cameron says, hilarious, and Dev says, the reflector was the best. Cameron thinks he needs new friends, but Josslyn says he’d be lost without them. He admits he would, and Trina suggests they get their skate on. They leave for the rink.

Curtis tells Jordan that he knows Ava can be a little extra, but don’t tell him that she’s falling for that lawyer and his BS.

Jax approaches Nina, and she tells him not to ask if she’s okay. He says he was going to ask if there was anything he could do to help.

Nikolas tells Laura that he’s sorry. He hated it as much as they did. Laura says she doesn’t think so. He knew they were alive; it’s not remotely the same. She says, the Halloween party. The man in the mask was him, wasn’t it? Why didn’t he reach out to her? He says he wanted to, and she says, but he didn’t. He followed Ava to the gallery, and took off his mask. Ava told her that she saw him, but she didn’t believe Ava. She thought Ava was having a nervous breakdown. Ava’s brother convinced her to commit herself when she was perfectly sane. Doesn’t he see the affect he’s had on everyone? He says, maybe what he did was wrong… She says, maybe? He says, he did it for Spencer. Laura claims she knows how dangerous Valentin is, but she doesn’t. The only way to secure the estate, and keep Spencer safe, was to take down Valentin. Laura says, it was worth anything, and he says, a temporary sacrifice. He won. It’s finally over, and now the damage can be repaired.

Maxie asks if Peter believes what he said, that everything will be better in the morning. Valentin walks in, and wakes Charlotte, telling her that they have to go right now. He picks Charlotte up, but Maxie says he’s not going anywhere. Not with her.

Jordan tells Curtis, they’ve been yanked around by a lot of people for a lot of different reasons. Clearly, a crime has been committed, and they need to bring Valentin in for questioning.

Nina tells Jax that she’s surprised how much she liked the dress. She was torn whether or not to get such a lovely dress. It turned out to be a revenge dress. It’s a pity, but he warned her. Jax says, it’s a beautiful dress, and Nina says she should change. She heads upstairs.

Laura tells Nikolas, she honestly doesn’t know what to say. He thinks she’ll eventually understand, but Laura says, right now, it feels unfathomable. Lulu says, what matters is Nikolas is home, and they’re grateful. They’ll figure out the rest later. Ava comes in and tells Nikolas, she’s sorry to cut the reunion short, but it’s time. Doc says, for what? and she says Nikolas didn’t tell them the happy news? She and Nikolas are getting married tonight. Everyone is in shock. I’m in shock that she negotiated that so quickly.

Tomorrow, Ava asks Laura to stay for the wedding, Nina just wants to get away from Windymere, Valentin punches Peter, and Anna won’t be satisfied until she gets all the answers.

Below Deck

Kevin flashes back to Justine telling him, chef to chef, he needs to go more upscale. The guests are talking about his cooking behind his back. She’s just looking out for him. Nicole and Zak are happy, but the other guests aren’t. Kevin tells her that he doesn’t need her to look after him. In his interview, Kevin says he’s pretty sure she flips burgers and takes pictures. Justine goes back to her girl crew, and says repeats what Kevin said. She tells them, If she was working on a boat, she wouldn’t want the guests not liking her food.

Ashton has a meeting with the deckhands to go over the schedule, and says they’re aiming for a 2 o’clock beach picnic. Kevin tells Courtney, Justine told him that he needs to step up his game. In Kevin’s interview, he says he works hard, and what he puts out contains a bit of him, and he takes it extremely personally. He asks Courtney if he thinks they like cream cheese in their sushi, and she reminds him that they have guests who don’t like dairy. He says, screw these people.

Simone gets drinks for the guests, and Kate tells them about the beach picnic. She asks Rhylee about the fishing trip, and tells her about Ashton going to the captain, and blaming her for going to the wrong spot. He said, since Rhylee was in charge, she should have researched it more, and it annoyed her. Kate thinks since Ashton is the head of the department, it should fall on him. In Rhylee’s interview, she says she’s not surprised Ashton threw her under the bus; she’s an easy scapegoat. She was technically leading the expedition – we see a clip of her and Ashton looking at a map – but to put the blame solely on her is infuriating.

Captain Lee tells Courtney about giving up his room to Lauren. Courtney thinks it’s weird that she accepted, but he says he doesn’t blame her for not wanting to sleep on the sofa, and she paid money for that. In the captain’s interview, he says, it’s her vacation. He couldn’t believe Jamie’s attitude, she was a spoiled brat. If he’d been the primary, he’d have told her to take what she got or got the eff off the boat. Kevin makes sushi.

The guests talk about the weather. Jamie says she’s overheated – probably from the 99 mimosas she’s had before breakfast – and goes to her room. Rhylee and Brian set up the pool, and Brian tries to find fault where there is none. She dared ask him where to place it, telling him she hasn’t been there when they did this before. In his interview, he says, when it comes to Rhylee, he tries, but she’s stubborn. We flash back to some so-called altercations, which are really a lot of nothing, and he says he doesn’t understand why it has to be that way. They put the pool in the water.

The captain advises Ashton on places to scout for the picnic. In Kate’s interview, she says she doesn’t hate Ashton, but she doesn’t respect him. She’s never had a bosun try to punch out a window in a fit of anger and rage. If she couldn’t do a job every time she worked with someone she didn’t like, she’d be unemployed. Kate tells Courtney that she’s going on ahead, and to send Simone with anything they’ve forgotten.

They unload the supplies at the beach, while the guests jump off the boat, and play in the water. Kevin asks where Katie Boo-Boo is, and Courtney says, she’s at the beach. Simone is going over with the food, which is news to Simone. In Simone’s interview, she says communication is bad on the boat, but she’s happy to do something different. Ashton says someone will have to sit next to him, and no surprise, Molly volunteers. Captain Lee tells Ashton that he’s subtle. In Ashton’s interview, he says, working on  yacht, there are always beautiful people. Molly is an absolute cracker, but he’s not going to cross the line, just possibly brush the line. He wonders if that’s a thing.

Kate tells the guests that they have sushi and salad for lunch, and Simone pours champagne. Justine tells Lauren that she just had a short conversation with Kevin, and thinks she scared him. Back on the yacht, Brian tells Ashton that Rhylee doesn’t listen. It’s her way or no way. Ashton says it frustrates him, since they have a cool vibe with Tanner. Rhylee tells Courtney about Ashton talking to the captain, and saying she should have known where fishing was legal. Brian says Rhylee comments here and there, and she’s not even lead deckhand. In Ashton’s interview, he says he can’t fault Brian for speaking to him. It’s draining, having to keep the peace. Now other crew members are saying they’re affected by it. Something has to change. Ashton asks if anyone wants to go snorkeling, but he has no takers. This is a lazy bunch.

The guests return, and are met with watermelon popsicles. Kevin goes over the evening’s menu, and Kate tells him that he’s doing a great job. Kevin wants to make ceviche, but he doesn’t get where the guests are coming from. Some want a cheese course, some don’t want cooking in Teflon pans, some are vegetarian. There are too many options; he doesn’t know where to start. For whatever reason, some of the women want to take posed photos with Ashton; Molly, who is a model, and it looks like Justine, who’s confusing me now. In his interview, he says, so far, he’s had to do a striptease and a lap dance. Now he’s doing a photo shoot with professional models. The Ashton sandwich will have good flavor. They take photos, while the captain watches from the bridge, and Nicole says, it’s like the cover of a romance novel. In his interview, Ashton says he’d expected the models to be stuck up, but they’re the kind of girls he could mix with. Brian and Courtney have a quick kiss in passing.

Rhylee tells Kate that she’s frustrated, but Kate tells her, don’t take everything so personal. Rhylee says she’s literally treated like nothing on deck, and Kate says, it’s like they want to have a girl who sucks. Abbi was bad at her job, so they were nice to her. She tells Rhylee that she’s better at her job than the rest of them. In Kate’s interview, she says, Rhylee has a temper, but works hard, and is very good at her job. If Ashton can’t manage Rhylee, she could use her in interior. She’s probably a better stew than Simone.

The guests get ready for dinner, and the captain sighs in the Sky Lounge, digging through his bags. Kate tells Tanner, G-V-O, and he responds by singing, good vibes only. Lauren tells Courtney that Jamie is in her cabin, but they don’t want to go to dinner without informing her. Courtney is it. Captain Lee gets dressed, and Courtney knocks on Jamie’s door. In Courtney’s interview, she says she doesn’t like getting involved in guest drama, but they all hate Jamie. What’s pettier than refusing to share a room, and making another guest sleep in the communal area? She tells the others that she called Jamie’s name, but there was no answer. Rhylee asks if Ashton wants to talk quietly. Captain Lee checks himself out in the mirror, and guesses it will work. It’s all he’s got.

Rhylee asks Ashton about throwing her under the bus. He says Kate told her about what he discussed with the captain. She says she constantly feels dismissed, and if he can take a second and understand what it’s like in her shoes. This is the second year she’s been dealing with this, and she’s been calm and quiet. Ashton disagrees, and wonders if it’s her insecurities. He says he’s on her side, but she says the problem is, she gets no support from him, even in this conversation, and it sucks. Ashton says maybe she should check how much of it is her insecurities, and how much is the rest of the crew. She says he’s not even listening. She’d like for him as bosun to figure out a resolution. He hasn’t even looked at her once during the conversation. He says he’s been tolerant of her, and she asks what that means. He says her attitude, her behavior, and body language. The way she does things gives off a negative vibe, and the other crew members see it. She says, it’s not her insecurities. It’s 100% the way of the vibe on the boat. He says, so it’s everyone else? and she says she told him, it’s the way of the vibe. He starts pointing at her with his finger, and she tells him not to do that. He says, the conversation is done. He’s her superior. She asks if he just dismissed her. He points his finger some more, and says the captain warned her. She tells him to quit pointing his finger at her, and he says she doesn’t give a f*** anyway. She says he’s right, and he tells her, go to bed. She says she’ll go to her quarters. I hate Ashton at this moment. He is dismissive of her, certainly isn’t like that with the dudes, and I can’t stand when someone doesn’t look at me while I’m talking. It can mean a lot of things, but regardless, it’s disrespectful. That’s his problem. He has more respect for the guys than he does for the women.

Kevin makes beautiful starter plates, and Kate calls the guests for dinner. He says, the plates are pretty, and waiting for the Gram. The captain joins the guests for dinner, and thanks them for inviting him. Kevin says, Justine will probably say there are maggots on her plate, but she declares it good. Molly says, the plating is fantastic, and Kate tells Kevin the guests are loving it. Nicole asks if Captain Lee if he ever goes to Charleston, and he says it’s one of his favorite places. She invites him to look them up when he’s there, and he says he looks forward to it. Kate serves scallops as the second course, and everyone agrees it’s great. Kate lets Kevin know the guests are super happy, and asks if he is. He ignores the question, since he’s busy charring something with a blowtorch, and Kate goes up with the dessert; crème brulee and deconstructed cheesecake. Lauran says, clearly, Justine put a fire under Kevin’s butt. Courtney makes up the Sky Lounge for the captain, who excuses himself, saying he has work to finish. Tanner asks Brian if he should make a move on Kate tomorrow, and Brian says, why not? Tanner says he’s going to roll the dice.

Rhylee tells Kate that she’s on early tomorrow, but was told to go to bed in a demeaning way. Ashton said he tolerated her, and she’s insecure. In Rhylee’s interview, she says she is who she is. She was seven when her mother married her stepfather. They moved from Alaska to Florida to open a bed and breakfast. Nobody goes on vacation to see and hear kids, who should be seen and not heard. In their case, they weren’t even seen, and would be forgotten. If she has to defend herself about something, she’ll do it, no matter what. She tells Kate, it’s humiliating. Captain Lee asks the deckhands to turn the bridge lights off. He can’t sleep with it lit up like a football field. The guests go to bed. At 4:03 am, Tanner has a nightmare, and screams his head off. Brian asks if he’s okay, and says Tanner nearly gave him a heart attack.

In her interview, Rhylee says, the situation with Ashton is not going to fix itself, but no matter what, she’s going to do her job as best she can. The captain talks to himself, saying, travel the world; it will be fun. Now he’s homeless, living out of blue bags. Tanner helps Simone wipe down the tables. In her interview, she says she’s hooked up with him and seen him naked, but wants to be mature about things working out. Ain’t no man going to distract her from her job. Ashton asks to talk to Captain Lee, who says he feels like he was rolled up in a bedsheet and beaten with baseball bat. Ashton says they have the same issues as last year. He’s tried to address Rhylee’s attitude. She works hard, but that’s only one aspect of the job. The crew has to get along. He would never speak to the captain the way Rhylee speaks to him. He’d rather do the last two charters a man down. Captain Lee says, it’s only six days. He really doesn’t want to make a radical change this late in season, but he’ll talk to her one on one. In his interview, the captain says he has two people bumping heads. That means he has to get involved, and no one will like it. It’s his responsibility to make sure things run smoothly. If you’re acting like a d*ck, I’m going to tell you. He radios Rhylee, and asks her to see him in his new office.

The captain tells Rhylee to have a seat. He says she and Ashton have a bit of an issue, and Rhylee says Aston told her that he tolerates her, whether he wants her there or not. It’s a totally different dynamic than with the guys and their banter. On deck, Tanner tells Brian there’s built up negative energy, and they compare Rhylee to cancer. Rhylee says she offers her opinions and tries to help, and Captain Lee says, sometimes when she offers an opinion, it comes off as criticizing people. People in general often don’t see how the way they express themselves is taken. He’s not saying it’s a one-way street. That’s where he thinks the real issue lies. They should confront problems head on, not run away from them. He’s going to talk to other members of the crew, and see what they think is going on. In Rhylee’s interview, she says, it’s a scary situation. If he’s going to talk to everybody, their opinions will be bias, and against her.

At breakfast, Zak asks Simone if they’re serving real maple syrup from Canada. (I’ll let it go that most people would think Vermont first.) She says she doesn’t know if it’s from Canada, but it’s the real deal. He says he doesn’t care where it’s from, as long as it’s not corn syrup. I can’t say as I blame him there; that stuff is crap. Simone assures him it’s not corn syrup, and brings in muffins. Captain Lee calls Tanner and Brian to the bridge. He says he’s going to ask them some questions, and he’s not interested in bullsh*t; he wants the truth. Ashton and Rhylee are going at it like a burlap bag of bobcats trying to get loose. Give him the skinny about what’s going on. Tanner says, it’s tense, and Rhylee doesn’t make it easy. Brian thinks she’s not right for the crew. She doesn’t like to listen, has a temper, and she’s disrespectful. Tanner says she’s difficult, and Brian says she’s mean and doesn’t respect any of them. Tanner says, it builds up until it explodes. The captain asks if they can’t tolerate it for another six days, but Brian says he’d rather deal with the last two charters a man down. Tanner says the energy transfers like a cancer. Captain Lee thanks them for their candor. He doesn’t know what he’s going to do, but he has to do something.

Zak tells the other guests that his bedroom smells a little funky, and it’s not from the bathroom; the bathroom smelled better. Courtney tells Kevin that he’s taking everything too personal, and he says Justine called his food sh*t. Justine slides into the galley, and says she apologizes for making him uncomfortable. Dinner was great, and everyone was impressed. He thanks her, and after she leaves, Courtney says he didn’t even look her in the eye. In Courtney’s interview, she says, look her in the eye, and say you appreciate the apology. She meant it. It’s their job to be nice to guests, but it’s also common courtesy. I doubt Kevin knows what that is, but nice try.

Captain Lee radios Kate, asking if he can impose on her for a bowl of Cheerios. Kate brings the cereal, and asks if he wants to eat in the breakfast lounge – i.e. another couch. He tells her about talking to Brian and Tanner, and she says it’s three against one. He says Rhylee seems difficult to get along with, but Kate says she thinks Rhylee is lovely, and asks what Rhylee had to say. He tells her that Rhylee accepts none of the responsibility, and thinks she’s getting picked on. Kate doesn’t feel that’s the bigger issue, and thinks everyone is wrong, but the responsibility falls on Ashton. Why give him the responsibility of being bosun, if he doesn’t want to be responsible for his team? Being a department head means helping the team work together. In her interview, Kate says, Ashton is a big time d*ck. If he wants to play the game where we talk bad about each other, let’s play. No one is putting Ashton in check, and it’s time someone does. He’s an ego tripping power cocky d*ck. On deck, Tanner tells Brian that Ashton has been patient with Rhylee, and Brian says more patient than he would be. He thinks Rhylee knows she’s leaving, and Tanner says she has a radio. She knows who’s being called to the bridge. In Tanner’s interview, he says, Rhylee has to go; they can’t all be miserable. They have to get rid of her. Brian says, it’s not fair. The anchor is pulled into the pocket.

Kate asks Ashton how his morning was, and Ashton says, there’s a lot to be thought about. The situation was aggravated when it didn’t need to be. She’s not in the position to discuss what he said to Captain Lee with Rhylee. Rhylee walks past, and all three of them are quiet. Ashton doesn’t think it’s right for Kate to get involved in the management of his team, and she tells him, don’t say anything in the presence of another crew member that he wouldn’t want repeated. He says he expects privacy and confidence. In Ashton’s interview, he says he’d never tell Courtney or Simone what Kate said, which I find hard to believe. He says, anybody with a sane mind would know this, but the rules don’t apply to her. We flash back to Kate complaining about Ben and Kevin getting involved in her management. Ashton says, it’s not her team, and Kate says the only reason she brought up the issue is that it needed to be addressed. He says he knows how to manage his team, but she says she doesn’t think he does. He wants to fire Rhylee, and that’s management; it’s quitting. He thinks she should apologize for getting involved in his management, but she tells him to feel free to bring up anything she says out loud. She has no secrets. He goes to his bunk, and calls her a bitch. The captain calls for the crew to get into their whites.

They dock, and Captain Lee calls the crew to the aft deck. In his interview, Kevin says this has been his favorite charter so far. He’s kidding. He hopes he never sees Justine again. Nicole says they had a fabulous time. She can’t thank the chef enough for making her favorite foods. She gives Captain Lee the tip envelope, and Zak says look them up if they’re ever in Charleston. The captain tells everyone, back to work, and Kevin sings about boiling water

Brian calls his daughter, and tells her that he’ll be coming in one week. In his interview, he says he hasn’t gotten to the stage of introducing anyone to his daughter. He’s going through it in his head, wondering about him and Courtney in the long term. They’re coming to the end of the season, and he doesn’t know what’s going to happen. Ashton tells Tanner that Kate pushes his buttons. She feels the needs to give her two cents about what happened with Rhylee. Tanner says, it’s not her business, and Ashton says she’s adding fuel to the fire, and causing more problems. Kate tells Rhylee that Ashton told the captain to fire her, and Rhylee says, for what? In Rhylee’s interview, she says, this is their leader? Instead of bringing her up or helping her, he’d prefer her to be fired. If she’s fired over something like this, her career in yachting might be in jeopardy. Where does she go from here? The captain calls everyone to meet in the crew mess.

Captain Lee says he thinks it was a good charter. The chef nailed it, and the girls did good. The tip was $17,700; $1600 each. He thinks it was appropriate, and he’s happy with it. In Kate’s interview, Kate says a lot of people don’t realize, she’s not a chief stew because the job is fulfilling. The money is fantastic. The captain says, the exterior had a lot stuff going on. Needless to say, he wasn’t pleased. He’s not sure yet how he’s addressing it. You can’t kick sh*t down the road, and think it’s going away, because it don’t. That, they can take to the bank. In his interview, Captain Lee says, the deck crew is behaving like little effing kids. Unfortunately for them, he doesn’t babysit. He’s fed up with the whining and bitching, and has to make a decision. This closely resembles a clusterf***. It’s a sh*t show.

Next time, the captain tells Rhylee they have a situation, and it’s a yacht, not Alaska; Alexis Bellino celebrates her divorce with a charter; and Tanner hooks up with Justine from this charter.

📡 News Flash: Gordon Ramsay’s 24 Hours To Hell and Back premieres tomorrow at 9 pm. The Haves and the Have Nots, and Vanderpump Rules are also premiering at 9, and I would think the universe hates me, were it not for the fact Gordon’s show will repeat on Saturday at 8 pm.

📺 And heard on Bravo: The Shahs of Sunset is coming soon. A date would have been nice.

💭 Like the Corners Of My Mind…

The cast of All My Children over the years.


🍸 Sad Stassi…

Not much info here. It’s more like a tease for Vanderpump Rules.


💋 From When She Began…

Lala, from start to wherever we are now.


🚤 With a Side of Sarcasm…

Some fun Below Deck recaps from Vulture.

Kate gets drunk.


Master Pearson returns.


Kate leaves the boat.


😥 Where’d You Go…?

Readership has become like eBay sales. Is it me?

June 10, 2019 – Part Two – A Chef Who Can’t Cook, Lotsa Lisa, Lisa’s Spinoffs, Who Antoinette Went Home With & a Winner


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


👈 Please see previous post for June 10th’s General Hospital.

Below Deck Mediterranean

Nice, France. Mila puts steaks in microwave to warm them up. I hear Gordon Ramsay screaming at her in my head. The steaks are served. Hannah gripes to the other stews about the microwave, but the guests like the food. Even the one who’s tough to please with a steak. Hannah is relieved. In her interview, Mila says she feels happy. It’s good that even though she was sick, she still managed. I’m cursing my life, since not only do Aesha and Anastasia have names that start with the same letter, they look similar. This is going to be a tough season.

Captain Sandy scarfs down a taco. She sees the infamous nacho chips, and asks Hannah how the guests are doing. Hannah says, okay. In Hannah’s interview, she says the last few seasons were rough. We flash back to that. She says communication with the captain is her main priority. She doesn’t want Captain Sandy seeing food, and wondering why Hannah didn’t say anything about it. The captain tells Hannah, the nachos look terrible, and Hannah says that’s why she didn’t take them out. The captain thanks her, and they high-five.

Travis says, they’re rolling towels and living the dream. Hannah asks João for a schedule. He says he’ll stay up until the guests go to bed. The nachos are tossed.

In the morning, Captain Sandy says they’re getting ready to leave, and checks on the guests’ dinner. In the captain’s interview, she thinks the guests are being nice, but she’s being cautious. She asks the crew to return radio one, and Jack brings it back. The last thing he wants is for Captain Sandy pulling his ear like a naughty schoolboy, and slapping his ass on the bridge. She tells them to start hauling anchor. The anchor is home, and they go into gear.

The beach picnic is today, and Hannah wants to go over the meal plan with Mila. Sandwiches and salads should be ready to go at 1:30. Mila says she’ll go and get inspiration, which I think means take a nap. Aesha serves breakfast, pointing out that every dot on a strawberry is an ovary. In her interview, she says, because she’s happy, people think she’s an airhead, but she’s smarter than she appears, and has a double science degree. One of the guests looks up the ovary thing online, and says she’s correct. It does sound like something somebody would make up.

João tells Travis about the schedule. Travis can’t believe he’s lead deckhand. He’s driving blind, and doesn’t know where he’s going with the tender. Captain Sandy says there’s only one beach there. In her interview, she explains they have to find private places for beach picnics, but if the guests want something, they get it. Hannah tells João to quit stalking Brooke’s Instagram. In his interview, he says, as much as he tries to hide his feelings about Brooke, they still linger. He says Hannah has brought an energy this season he never thought he’d see. Rut-roh.

Mila says if she was on a boat, she wouldn’t ask for club sandwiches, but you have to give the guests what they want. She’s making salads, and they’re nearly an hour behind schedule. Hannah doesn’t know how you can be late, making sandwiches for five people. Captain Sandy asks the sky not to rain. The food is on it’s way, and Hannah asks Mila if they don’t need a few things like a knife. In her interview, Hannah says things are happening that shouldn’t happen on a superyacht.

Pointe d’ le Something. At the beach, Aesha radios Hannah, asking for a ten minute warning, but Hannah says the guests are coming now. They arrive, and Aesha welcomes them to lunch. She makes drinks. Back at the yacht, everything is cleaned and tidied. Hannah double-checks everything. She thinks it’s a miracle that it’s all done. She’s happy with a strong third stew in Anastasia. It’s been testy for the past few years. We flash back to the duds. In her interview, Anastasia says she likes being the best at what she does, whether it’s cleaning toilets or cooking a five-course meal. Thank you. I’m with her on that.

In the galley, Mila tells João and Jack about pursuing her culinary school dream.

Aesha realizes they forgot the tequila. In her interview, Hannah says she has so many balls in the air, she’s not surprised she dropped one. She needs everyone to do their jobs. João brings two bottles. Colin says he’s like Aquaman. He’s got the goods, and he’s saving the day. Then Colin ruins it. João tosses the bottles to him, and he drops one.

Captain Sandy sees rain coming, and hopes it goes the other way. Jack says he’s going to make her the best tea on board. He doesn’t think she’s seen him at his best yet. Mila says the guests have requested Italian tonight, but she can’t give them prosciutto, since there’s no machine to slice it properly. Hanna says she has Mila’s back, but in her interview, Mila says she hates fake people, and thinks Hannah is fake. Well, she’s just a co-worker. Who cares?

A storm comes up, and the captain hears thunder. She tells João to get the guests back in the boat. Everything on deck is covered. On the beach, Jay says, it comes in fast. Hannah radios João, and tells him to help pack up and get the guests back. Aesha says, they’re coming. The captain greets them, saying she didn’t want them struck by lightning. João goes back again, and helps Colin pack up at super speed.

Jack wants quick cuppa tea, but João suggests he help with the work. Jack says he’s not standing in the rain, but João says he will if they need him too. In João’s interview, he says Jack should think like the engineer he is. If João is going to be a more efficient as a leader. he has to figure out what motivates Jack. This is a good question. Does anything? Hannah asks Captain Sandy how the weather is looking, and the captain thinks it might pass, but they should have dinner inside, since she still hears thunder. Hannah tells Mila that Carol wants a white cake with white frosting for her birthday. In Mila’s interview, she says she’s not a cake person. She didn’t do a patisserie course, and hopes they like it. Come on, man. How hard is it? Even I can bake a decent cake.

The table is set, balloons are blown up, and crepe paper is streamed. Captain Sandy decides she’ll try and slice the prosciutto. Her father was in the meat business. She tells Mila. you don’t give up. If the guests want ham, they get ham. Holy! She is really good at that, slicing it thin with a big knife. She says it’s like being back in the meat shop, which she never liked, but it made her night to contribute. I like Captain Sandy because you know she’d never ask you to do something she wouldn’t do. That’s a good boss.

The guests get ready. The stews try the cake, and at first it’s all yum, but then Anastasia says she bit into some baking powder. They realize it the baking powder taste is too strong. In her interview, Anastasia says, it’s baking soda in cake form; it’s disgusting. Hannah says she can’t serve it to the guests. Mila insists it’s not that strong, and says she’ll serve it. I always forget they don’t wear shoes on the yacht, and get startled when I see their feet. Hannah takes a piece of the cake to Captain Sandy, who says, wow. It’s so bad. She says they’re in trouble. She’ll handle it. In her interview, she says a lot of chefs are good at cooking, but not baking. However, a yacht chef has to do both. She can’t discuss all that now, because there’s no time. She has to get Mila to focus on the food and making a good meal. Anastasia suggests cupcakes. In her interview, she says she was a chef on the last boat she worked on, and thinks there’s no excuse. Baking is in her blood. Her mom was a pastry chef, and she’s got this. She tells everyone what she needs, and Hannah tells the captain that Anastasia is taking over with the cake.

Carol thinks the décor is really pretty. Anastasia rocks cake making. Captain Sandy tests the batter, and loves it. She says, teamwork. Jack hides while the other guys work. Hannah serves a caprese salad.  Anastasia says she was happy to bang out another cake. Jack sits in the galley, eating. In her interview, Anastasia says she has a dirty mind, but she’s not promiscuous. She’d rather watch the Gilmore Girls. Truffle pasta is served. Carol says, it’s beyond good. Mila ices the cake. Hannah calls the crew to sing, and tells Anastasia to carry the cake since she made it. In Mila’s interview, she says she feels bad already, and Hannah had to say Anastasia made the cake in front of everyone. Don’t give her a fake smile next time. Happy Birthday is sung, and Carol blows out the candles. She says she’s going to cry. In the galley, Captain Sandy says, good job, and she and Jack clink teacups. The cake is served, and Jay says it’s the best cake he’s ever had. He asks if Mila does the baking, and Aesha says Anastasia baked the cake. Mila is annoyed with Aesha, and says it was nice of her to let the guests know. Aesha says they asked, and she wasn’t going to lie. Besides, Anastasia deserved it. For whatever reason, Mila refuses to believe the guests asked about the cake. I’m starting to think Mila might not last through the season. She gripes to Anastasia, who doesn’t think Aesha meant anything by it, adding the day has been stressful. Mila says she knows what was being said. Colin and João talk about Hannah and Mila going after each other, and João compares them to cats.

Breakfast served. In Anastasia’s interview, she says, Aesha is crazy and inappropriate, and the guests love her. The guests continue to rave about the cake, saying Anastasia is so talented, which must be killing Mila. Anchor is hauled up. Jack says he’s not experienced in that, and has no clue what’s going on. He’s just out there to get some sun. I don’t know if he’s lasting either. João discusses the lines with the captain. In his interview, he says although he’s worked with her, it’s never been in this position. He needs to prove she can trust him under pressure. If she trusts him now, she’ll trust him all season. He asks Travis to do some nautical things. In Travis’s interview, he says people who work on yachts think they’re all that, even though they’re really an effing janitor on a floating toilet. But if his boss tells him to do something, he’ll do it.

The guests pack. The captain says there’s a bit of current, and docking is a little tricky. João and Travis help guide her in. Jack asks if he could be shown how to do it next time. Captain Sandy says, maybe, and tells João that he did nicely. He says, nailed it, and he and Travis high-five.

Aesha says she got a head start on going out. She’s soaked her tampon in vodka. Hey, I just report what I’m seeing and hearing. In her interview, she says she’d never do that, but it sounds interesting, and she’d like someone else to try it. Maybe she can get Jack to do it. The guests don’t want to leave. The crew is called to the dock. Jay gets weepy, and says they’re amazing. It was the greatest vacation of his life. He wishes them a great season. In her interview, Mila says Russian men don’t cry, even at their mother’s funerals. It makes her feel uncomfortable and weird. Geez, the dude is probably crying because he has to go back to work soon. And didn’t she spend a bunch of time in France? I bet they cry there.

Tip time! The captain says, in spite of Mila being sick, they came together. She thanks the interior for taking charge in the galley. She can trust them. She doesn’t know about Jack though. In Jack’s interview, he says it’s lucky he has his smile. He paid enough for it, so he’s using it to get himself out of trouble. The tip is 13K euros, which I had to look up, and it translates to $14,706.19 – 1175 euros each, or $1329.21. They have some champagne, and laugh a lot. The boat is cleaned up, and the crew cleans themselves up. Sitting outside, Mila asks if Jack prefers boys, and he tells her, piss off.

Captain Sandy calls Mila to the bridge. In her interview, the captain says just because the charter guests liked the food, doesn’t mean it’s up to standard, and she knows what standard is. She needs to see the standards of someone who was trained in Paris. She shows Mila photos of how she should be plating food. Ouch. But yeah, her plating is crummy. Those MasterChef Junior kids are a million times better. She tells Mila that she’s been doing this a long time, and worked with a lot of chefs. She has to know Mila can do this, and right now, she doesn’t know. She had a rough start because she was sick, but she’s not sick now. Captain Sandy says, let’s do this. She has it, right? Mila nods, and in her interview, says she’s grateful for the captain’s opinion. Captain Sandy’s words make her feel like she really wants to perform more. She worded it like that, not me.

Jack can’t believe Mila with her hair all blown out. He says she thought he was gay, and Travis says, it’s a compliment. Jack says he didn’t think he was giving that vibe. Mila comes by with beer, and asks if they’re stepping out tonight. Jack says he’ll step out with her.

Everyone heads out. In Jack’s interview, he explains that he was going out with girl when he left. He was honest, and told her that he wouldn’t be loyal. He’s going out for a few drinks, and a little wiggle. And maybe have a crack on with one of the girls. Who knows what will happen? In the car, Colin asks how dinner was. Mila is in the other car, and Hannah says, the experience or the food? She thinks if you’re working on a yacht this size, and serve that kind of food, you’re not a good chef. She’s not being a bitch. She thinks Mila is a nice person.

In the other car, Travis says, Russians are homophobes, and Mila agrees. She’s also happy to be one. She doesn’t care what people do at home, but she doesn’t want her son growing up seeing two men kissing, and think it’s normal. It’s not.

João says Mila is sweet, and Hanna says, she’s a lovely person. I laugh, thinking, just wait. Mila says she’s proud of Putin, and glad he doesn’t let them have gay parades in their country. Travis tells her, STFU. Get out of the van. Um… he’s not driving, so I don’t think he gets a say in that. Travis says he’s never going to speak with her again. Maybe he’s been with men, or maybe those are his friends. Mila tells him, all she said is that she doesn’t want to see it openly. He says her opinion of gay people is her opinion of humanity. She says, it’s not normal. Is being with an animal normal? There’s a millisecond of silence, where they all can’t believe what they just heard. In Travis’s interview, he says, her mindset is warped. He tells her to sit at the opposite end of the table, calling her an oxygen thief.

Next time, the primary is Captain Sandy’s friend the vibrator queen, Colin gets hurt, Hannah doesn’t want to work with a homophobic pr*ck who can’t cook, the guests don’t like the food, and Anastasia gets put in the galley.

💋 Lots of LVP…

Her evolution.


Skipping the reunion.


Why she quit.


And who might replace her.


🌴 And On Lisa’s Coattails…

Restaurant drama with the Vanderpump Rules cast.



To prenup or not to prenup.


I doff my cap to Stassi.


More Jax and Brittany pre-wedding festivities. Stassi’s suit is a no. Just no. As a matter-of-fact, none of the suits are all that attractive. Maybe Lala’s.


Warning: boobies ahead.


🏆 And You Get a Tony…

Everything about the awards in a nutshell.


🍱 A Combination…

The Tony Awards, Pride month, and one of my favorite songs from a musical.


May 28, 2019 – Sam Says Game Over, Mitch Keeps the Peace, Farrahween, Bad Joke Overreaction, a Little Balance, Another Breakup & a Baby Lion


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Scotty finds Ava in the interrogation room. She asks what he’s doing there, and he says he heard she got arrested on the police scanner. She’s not walking into the arraignment alone. He’s there; let him help her. She says if he wants to help, bring her confirmation that she killed Ryan.

Jordan stirs, and Curtis says he doesn’t know how she does it; waking up looking beautiful every day. She calls him a liar, and he says, facts. She starts to sit up, and he tells her, be careful. He’ll get a nurse. She says, talk to her. What happened? He asks what she remembers. She says he came back from Canada. Did he find Ryan?

On the phone, Monica finds out Ryan is still in surgery. Drew approaches, and she asks how he’s doing. He says that’s kind of why he’s there. He has some things to take care of before he and Kim leave town. She says, they’re going away together?

Julian gives Kim some paperwork, and says they should have no problem going through customs. Kim thanks him, and he says he knows how much the trip means to her. He hopes it brings her peace. She does too. He hugs her, and says he wishes he could make it easier. She says he is. She knows Oscar would want her to do this. She goes into the bedroom to get her passport, and Julian calls Alexis. He thanks her for the expedited paperwork. Kim needs to bring Oscar’s ashes to Mount Kilimanjaro. He never thought things could move that fast. She’s glad she can help, and he says he owes her already for getting him out of jail. She says he should thank Doc for dropping the charges. He wishes all of his problems were that easily solved. Kim comes back, and he says he was thanking Alexis for greasing the wheels. She says, he got arrested?

Sam and Jason look into Shiloh’s room. Jason asks how she’s feeling, and Sam says, like a huge weight has been lifted. It’s one of the hardest cons she’s ever had to run. She hated pretending to believe what Shiloh said; it was disgusting. Jason says he’ll see if Monica can get a rush on the toxicology report.

Neil visits Alexis. He tells her that he’s anxious to see how the plan to neutralize Shiloh panned out. Alexis says, apparently, he drugged Sam, who was kept for observation, but she’ll be okay. He’s glad about that, but wonders how did the plan work?

Sam sits on Shiloh’s bed. He says, please tell him that Jason failed, and adds, no matter how hard Jason tries, he can’t keep them apart.

Ava asks if Ryan is dead or not, but Scotty doesn’t know. She says she lives in hope. What happened is justice; a knife in Ryan’s back. Her only regret is that she didn’t twist it. Scotty says she can think that, but don’t say it. If he does, she could face a murder rap. She says he makes it sound like she’s done something to be ashamed of. She avenged her daughter’s death. Scotty says she can call it revenge or justice, but she’s pleading not guilty.

Jordan tells Curtis that she needs to know. He tells her, relax. Ava used herself as bait, luring Ryan to a remote cabin, where he caught up with her. Chase took Ryan into custody, and Ava stabbed him in the back while he was handcuffed. He’s in surgery. Jordan wonders if he’ll make it, but Curtis doesn’t know. She says she can’t blame Ava. Badge or no badge, she’d want the same thing. Curtis says they need Ryan to live. She asks what he isn’t he telling her.

Drew tells Monica that he and Kim are leaving for Tanzania. They’re taking Oscar’s ashes to Mont Kilimanjaro, since Oscar never made the trip. He wanted her blessing, since the Quartermaines are usually buried in the crypt. She says, not this time. She thinks Kilimanjaro is perfect for Oscar, but if they don’t mind, she’d like to put Oscar’s plaque in with the rest of the family. Drew thinks Oscar would like that. He loved being part of the family. He had a special spirit. Monica says he got it naturally from his father. Drew doesn’t know about that, but appreciates her saying it. Jason approaches, saying he doesn’t want to interrupt. Drew says it’s not an interruption. They’re family, right?

Alexis tells Neil that they need proof Shiloh drugged Sam. Then they can force him to return Kristina’s Pledge. Neil thinks maybe that will cancel some of Kristina’s self-criticism and self-blame, but she still has a long way to go. Alexis appreciates his help, and he says he’s still her therapist; she’s still his priority. Alexis says she’s not sure she’s the one with the problem. Kristina appears, and says, that would be her.

Shiloh tells Sam that Jason can’t hurt them now. His heart is full that she still believes, and is listening to her inner voice. She says he’s so in love with himself. He’s the one in love with his inner voice.  He asks what she’s saying, and she says, game over, Shiloh, Hank, David, or whatever he’s calling himself. You lose.

Ava asks Scotty what difference it makes, as long as the bastard who killed her daughter is dead. He says a first year law student could handle her case. She has to plead temporary insanity. Ava says if the DA says it was premeditated, she’d be right. Ava had every intention of killing Ryan. It didn’t play out the way she’d planned, but hopefully, she got the job done. He says, how about this? She matters to him. She might have given up on herself, but he hasn’t.

Julian tells Kim it was no big deal; one night in lockup. He was defending his sister’s honor, and slugged Doc, but he dropped the charges. Kim heard him say there were other problems. What else isn’t he telling her? He says he’s a big boy; he can take care of himself. She knows he can, but she wants to know if he needs her. Is he in trouble? His phone rings. He says, it’s Scotty, and might be about Ava. Scotty asks where he is. Didn’t he hear the news Ava was arrested? She’s at the PCPD, and needs him now. Julian tells Kim that he has to go. Ava’s been arrested. She says she’s coming with him, but he says she has a plane to catch. When she comes back, he’ll be there and waiting for her. She says he’d better be, and they kiss.

Curtis tells Jordan, something else happened. She says she was relieved to hear he was okay. Her heart was beating hard, and she couldn’t catch her breath. He says she had a cardiac episode, and she asks if he means a heart attack. He says, everything is under control, and she tells him, just say it. He says the dialysis put a strain on her heart. If she continues it, her heart will be compromised.

Jason asks if Drew wants him to do anything while he’s gone. Drew says, maybe one thing. He can get a head start on the plans for the treehouse. Monica says Oscar expected them to build it together, and Jason says he’ll order the supplies, and they can start when Drew gets back. They shake hands, and Drew leaves. Monica says she didn’t want to worry Drew any further, but how’s Sam. Jason says, she’s clear to go home, but they need her to expedite the toxicology report. They need proof Shiloh drugged Sam.

Alexis says it doesn’t look like Kristina got much sleep, and Kristina says she had a rough night. She knows Sam just got involved with DOD because of her. Neil says Kristina’s concern is admirable, and shows that Shiloh no longer has a hold over her, but Kristina says, he does. There’s something about DOD she didn’t tell them.

Sam puts her finger in Shiloh’s face, and says she’s so sick of listening to his voice. I’m dying laughing, he’s so surprised. She ask if he knows how hard it was to listen to his self-serving garbage. He says all he was trying to do was help her, and Jason threw him down the stairs. That’s attempted murder. She says, is it? Does he have a witness? She answers her own question, saying, no, he doesn’t. Because he abducted her, and they were alone in the tower. She was too drugged up to resist. He says she willingly drank the tea, and committed to the ceremony. She willing signed the Pledge. She says, please. The Pledge was as bogus as his book. What did Molly call it? Cliché and derivative. Jason walks in, and Sam asks if he has it. He says he sure does. The toxicology report says Sam was drugged. He says she drank the tea willingly, but Jason tells him, the recording says different. Shiloh says he didn’t consent to being recorded, but Sam says she did, and in the state of New York, that’s all they need. Jason says, assault, attempted rape; who knows what else they’ll find when they start investigating? Shiloh is going to prison for a long time.

Julian meets Scotty at the station, and asks, what the hell happened? Scotty says Ryan tried to resurrect himself, and Ava tried to put an end to him once and for all, allegedly sticking a knife in his back while he was handcuffed. Julian says, good for her, but Scotty says she’s pleading guilty. He wants her to plead temporary insanity, but she won’t budge. He wants Julian to talk to her.

Ava tells Kiki that she’ll be able to rest. Her killer is going to pay. Julian comes in, and Ava says Scotty must have called him. Julian has to hand it to her. She had him fooled. Nice work. She fooled him into thinking she was in love with Doc. She asks if Ryan is dead. He doesn’t know for sure, but he’s guessing no. He tells her that she can’t plead guilty. She asks, why? She set out to avenge her daughter, and it’s what she did. She’s not hiding it; she’s proud of it.

Josslyn visits Kim, saying she got Kim’s message. It’s weird. They were together practically 24/7 before Oscar passed away, and now Josslyn hasn’t seen her since. Kim says she couldn’t face the Nurses Ball, and Josslyn says she almost didn’t go herself. Cameron brought her a message from Oscar, a video he’d pre-recorded. He said he wanted her to live her life, starting at the Nurses Ball by singing. Kim can only imagine how hard it was. Josslyn says she knows it sounds weird, but when she thought she couldn’t do it, Oscar was there. She saw him, and didn’t want to let him down, so she sang. Kim says, it’s not weird. She’s sure Oscar was there. He loved music, and he loved her, which is why she and Drew are sure he’d want her to have this. He hands her Oscar’s guitar.

Curtis tells Jordan that they’ll get through this. Jordan says the kidney transplant isn’t a quality of life issue anymore; it’s life or death. She knows why he wants Ryan alive. Doc is a match, and Ryan is his twin. Curtis says if Ryan lives, he’ll convince him to donate. She asks, if he dies? and Curtis says he’s going to save her. He doesn’t care what it costs, or what favors he has to call in. Wherever he has to go, he’ll go there. She says don’t make her arrest him. He says as ruthless as Ryan was, he’s that in love. He’s going to find a way to give her the second chance at life she deserves.

Alexis tells Kristina, there’s no point reliving nightmare, but she wants to say it while she has the courage. It’s not what Shiloh did, it’s what she did before joining the Trust. He wanted her to make an offering; a secret that was deep and important. Alexis asks if she means the Pledge. Kristina asks if Alexis knows what she gave Shiloh, and Alexis says, not unless she wants to tell.

Shiloh tells Jason and Sam that Sonny threatened him. Jason says, Sonny doesn’t make threats. Sam says Shiloh has no idea how hard she had to work to convince Sonny to let her deal with him herself. Kristina is her sister, but Sonny is an overprotective father. She wouldn’t be surprised if Sonny did deal with Shiloh himself. Not now; there’s too much scrutiny. Jason says when he’s sent to Pentonville, when everyone has forgotten about him, accidents happen. Shiloh asks what they want. Jason says, Kristina’s Pledge. Give it to them or they give him up to the cops.

Ava thinks she should get a medal for stabbing Ryan. The DA agreed to call off the search, giving a serial killer a free pass. Ava never believed he was dead, and she out-manipulated him. The only reason she didn’t pull the trigger, was because Curtis said Kiki would want her to help save Jordan, and he was right. Kiki was too generous for her own good, but Ava knows better. The only way to get justice in this world is to take it. Scotty says Curtis can testify to her state of mind. If she flushes her life down the drain, Ryan wins. Is that what she wants?

Josslyn tells Kim that’s she’ll have to see if she remembers what Oscar taught her. Drew arrives, and asks if Kim is ready. He tells Josslyn the guitar looks good on her. Kim tells him that she wanted Josslyn to have before they left. Josslyn asks where they’re going, and Kim says they’re taking a trip. Drew says they’re going to make Oscar’s trip to Mount Kilimanjaro. Kim adds, to say goodbye to their son.

Monica joins Curtis is Jordan’s room. He says he was just explaining about getting a new kidney. Monica says, that’s the plan. Does Jordan have any questions? Jordan asks if Ryan is out of surgery, and Monica says, stand down, commissioner. She just had a serious episode, and can’t afford any strain on her heart. She tells Jordan to take a leave of absence. Let someone else do the job. She helped save Port Charles from a monster. The least they can do is help give her back her life.

Kristina says when Shiloh told her that he wanted something important and personal, she thought about when she tried to blackmail Parker, but he didn’t want that. He wanted… Neil says, something more useful that he could cash in later. Kristina says she was too stupid to see it, and Alexis says she was betrayed by someone she trusted. Kristina says, now they’re all going to pay the price, and Alexis asks what she told him. Kristina says, something about her family.

Shiloh asks if this is over if he gives them the Pledge. Jason says, it’s already over. He’s never going to bother Kristina again. It’s up to him if he walks away or not. Shiloh says He’ll cooperate, and Jason asks where the Pledges are. Shiloh says in the place where Jason almost killed him.

Ava tells Julian she lured Ryan to her cabin with every intention of killing him, and stabbed him in the back in front of police witnesses, but she was never more sane or sure of anything. How can she get around that? Julian says they can deal with the questions, but he can’t deal with her giving up. She needs to keep her mouth shut, and do what Scotty says. She calls Scotty her knight in shining armor. Julian says if she wants revenge, she needs to plead not guilty. If Ryan ends up in Ferncliff while she goes to prison, she won’t be able to finish what she started.

Josslyn says, Oscar talked a lot about Kilimanjaro, especially after he got sick. Oscar would want them to take him there. He wouldn’t want to be in an urn in a vault, but under the stars. If he knew they were doing it together, it would make him even happier. Drew asks if she wants a ride, but she thinks she’ll stop by the park. She’s going to Oscar’s Meadow, and see if she remembers the chords he taught her. She thanks Kim, and hugs her. Drew hopes she thinks about Oscar when she plays, and she says she’s always thinking of him. She hugs Drew, and tells them to take lots of pictures. She leaves, and Kim says Josslyn has been through so much, and stays so strong. Drew says, she’s not the only one.

Monica checks Jordan’s vitals, and says her blood pressure is elevated, and she has a low grade fever. The sooner they find a kidney, the better. Curtis says they need Ryan to make it through surgery. Monica says she’ll check on him. Jordan thanks her, and Monica says again, they owe her. She leaves, and Jordan doesn’t know what’s worse; her heart nearly stopping or agreeing to a leave of absence. Curtis says she’ll be back to fighting for truth and justice in no time. Until then just get better. Let him pamper her; he’ll fluff her pillow, spoon feed her rocky road ice cream, whatever she needs. She says she has everything she needs right there, and he kisses her.

Alexis tells Kristina, don’t worry. Whatever she said, they’ll deal with it. Neil thinks it’s a family matter, and it’s best to keep it that way. Kristina thanks him for his help, and he says, there’s more where that came from. He’s just a phone call away. When he’s gone, Alexis says Kristina is very brave to come forward. Whatever secret she told, her father will take care of it. Kristina says, it’s not about him.

Sam and Jason go to the tower. Sam looks sick, and remembers Shiloh starting to get undressed, and saying they were destined to know each other on every level. It starts tonight. Jason tells her that she can wait downstairs, but she says she’ll be okay. She thought she could fight him off, but she couldn’t. She was thinking, poor Kristina; she would have been alone. Jason says Sam would have been looking out for her. They start looking for the Pledges.

Kim says she promised not to cry on Drew’s shoulder anymore, and he asks what else is he good for? She says he needs his strength to climb the mountain, and more when he gets to the top. He says that’s why they’re doing it together. Kim says they have a plane to catch, and he says, they do. Let’s go. They head out.

Ava tells Julian it never occurred to her that Ryan might live. He would just end up back in Ferncliff or some other institution. Julian says, and Kiki’s murder goes unavenged. Scotty returns, saying he spoke to the judge. Ava is going to be arraigned this afternoon. He hopes Julian convinced her to fight. Ava tells him, don’t just stand there looking good. Start earning your fee.

Curtis says he and Jordan never got their honeymoon in Fiji. They could start looking at hotels. Sun and sand will do them some good. Monica tells them that Ryan is out of surgery, and Curtis asks if he’s going to make it. She says, it’s too early tell. Jordan wonders why Ryan would consent to give her a kidney.

Alexis says Shiloh needed leverage to use against Kristina or someone she loves. Kristina says she’s so sorry. Alexis says, if the secret isn’t about Kristina’s father… it’s about her.

Jason opens a desk drawer, and says, found it.. Sam asks how they know those are real, and Jason says they’ll have to open one. He picks up Margaux’s envelope. Good choice! He opens it, and looks at Sam, saying, it looks real to him. Sam looks through the envelopes and finds Kristina’s. She says, that’s it. Shiloh is finally finished. Jason says, not yet, but they’re close.

Tomorrow, Sasha tells Nina that she loves it there, Alexis asks Kristina what’s in the Pledge, Maxie doesn’t believe it, and Jason tells Sonny he has leverage against the DA.

The Haves and the Have Nots

Madison keeps trying to call David, but gets voicemail. He asks his co-worker Tisha (I got a name!) if she’s sure it’s him, and she says, it’s the same address. He thinks David is probably out on Valium. He says he told Jeffrey not to go over there. He tries the radio, and Tisha makes a call. Madison thinks it’s David, but she’s gotten Veronica, who’s just pulling into her driveway. Madison says he thinks Jeffrey has been hurt, and to come to the hospital. She says, who is this? and he realizes he’s not talking to David. He says, it’s Madison, and Veronica asks, what happened? He says, just come. Veronica drives back out.

Madison asks why Tisha called Jeffrey’s mother. She says, it’s on his records, and she’s his mother. He says Tisha doesn’t know her. David calls back, and Madison says he needs to come to the hospital. It’s Jeffrey. David asks, what’s wrong? and Madison says he just needs to come. David is like, damn, and jets.

Veronica gets there first. Tisha tells her the ambulance isn’t there yet; she’s still waiting to hear. Veronica says Tisha called her. What the hell happened? Madison comes out, and says, a shooting. They got a call from the address that there were two gunshot wounds to the head. David arrives, and Madison says, there are two gunshot wounds to the head coming in. Davis asks if Jeffrey has been shot, but Madison doesn’t know. David asks why he called, and Madison says, it’s his address; Spanish Moss Trail. Veronica says, whose address that is. Is it that boy? David says, yes. She says she told him to get that boy in line. David asks if Madison has called the ambulance. Madison says he’s been trying, but he’s not getting a response. They must be working on him. David says he should have made Jeffrey leave, and Veronica asks if Jeffrey was with that homosexual girl. Tisha gets a call, and says, it’s not two; it’s one wound, but she doesn’t know which one of them it is. It doesn’t look good. She says she’s sorry. A gurney is quickly wheeled past, and Veronica yells for Jeffrey. David says he’ll kill that son of a bitch.

Meanwhile, at the Iron Bone (I just like saying that), Mitch sees a cousin/uncle/thug/whatever, and says, look who’s up early drinking beer. Dude says, it’s the breakfast of champions. Funny. I thought that was a Hall’s cough drop, coffee, and a cigarette. Mitch asks where Uncle Vinnie is. He’s going to meet with Cryer. Dude says, the guy who stabbed Uncle Vinnie? but Mitch says, his father. Dude suggests he get Vinnie’s $50K, and while he’s at it, he heard Vinnie talking about that Black kid. He wants his money. Mitch says Benny is working on it, and dude wonders how the hell Benny has $8 million, and can’t pay back the family. Mitch asks if he’s stupid, and dude says, what’s stupid is Benny not paying what he owed. Uncle Vinnie was drunk last night, and talking crazy. Mitch says he’ll be back later with the money, and dude says he’d better be.

Madison tells David and Veronica, still no word on the surgery. Veronica asks, what kind of hospital is this? and David says, stay calm. She says she told him, but he doesn’t need to hear that. She asks what the address is, and he says, Spanish Moss Trail, apartment number seven; why? She wants to see what happened, and make sure the DA gets all the evidence. She’s going to put that bastard homosexual away for life. David says their son is in surgery, and may not make it. She says, Jeffrey will make it. He’s a fighter like his momma. She’s a survivor, not like him, letting Jeffrey go be with those people. They’re wicked. Doesn’t he get it? They’re evil. Destruction follows them everywhere. Does he know how many are on crystal meth? Disease and death follows them, and it’s what he allowed for their child. They’re sodomites, and he allowed it. He did that, and now look at this. This is war, and it’s all his fault. She tried to tell him. If Jeffrey doesn’t make it, she promises… A crying Madison approaches them, and says he’s sorry. Jeffrey didn’t make it. Just as I’m thinking, hmm… we didn’t actually see him, Madison says he was told the African American guy didn’t make it. Veronica asks, why do you people lie so much? You lie about everything. Lying is in your DNA. He even lies about something this serious. The smell on him disgusts her. She comes close to him, and sniffs. She says he smells like a lie. Why is he crying? Don’t cry over her boy; he’s not dead. She grabs Madison’s face, and says, liar. She walks out. David asks where he is. Madison calls the doctor, and David cries.

Wyatt pretends to be Jim, and calls through to Kathryn’s car.

In Kathryn’s car, impressing his friends, RK tells them he’s changed things. He’s different; he’s better. He’s got them. The phone rings, startling him. Wyatt tells him, get his ass over there. RK says his guy wasn’t around, and he had to wait until morning. Wyatt had better have the money. Wyatt says RK better be on his way. If he isn’t, Jim is going to report the car stolen, and RK will get caught with his stuff. RK says just make sure he has the damn money. He’s on his way. He says, you can call the car. It’s like a spaceship

Jim sees Kathryn sleeping, and slams the door. He says, hungover? and she says, yes, you ass. He says, good. Is he talking too LOUD? She says, like he’s never been hungover. He says the child who brought her home stole her car. She asks, what child? and he says she doesn’t remember? She says, who cares? and he says her car is gone. He stole it. She says she’ll get another one, but Jim says not before he puts the kid’s ass in jail. She says, the kid from the bar? He says she’s stupid when it comes to money, but she disagrees. That’s why she has a lot, and he’s done. He has none. The stupidest thing she ever did was marry him. He says that was the smartest thing. He keeps her in money. It’s his brand that kept her rich. She gave Hanna $8 million; is that smart? Kathryn says, she’ll give it back, and tells him, don’t go near Hanna’s son; she means it. He tells her, take a shower. She smells like a daycare. She suggests he take a hike off a cliff. In a really odd moment, he helps her up, and fixes the covers. Force of habit?

Wyatt tells Jim that someone is coming up the driveway. Jim says, he’s a Malone. Mitch rings the bell, and Jim comes out. Mitch introduces himself, saying, he came to negotiate a truce. Money for his son. Wyatt did a lot of damage, and the family is pissed. He’s there to keep the peace. Jim says he has no idea what Mitch is talking about, and Mitch asks if that’s a game Jim wants to play. Jim asks how he knows it was Wyatt, and Mitch says he found the receipt with Wyatt’s name on it. Jim asks what he wants, and Mitch says, $75K. Jim asks if that’s how much the drugs were worth that Wyatt bought, and Mitch says, it’s not about what Wyatt bought. It’s about him buying peace. Jim thinks it’s unreasonable, but Mitch says he doesn’t. Especially if his grandma found out his son put hers in the hospital. Jim has to agree, and Mitch says he’ll wait. He’s not going anywhere until he gets it. Jim says he’ll write a check, but Mitch says, the family doesn’t do checks. Cash only. Jim says he’ll bring it to the bar in the morning. Mitch says his uncle is pretty pissed. He suggests Jim give to him. Jim says, if he does this, his son will be left alone. Mitch says, yeah, but Jim has a question. It’s usually blood for blood. What’s different? Mitch says Jim has him in the middle. He doesn’t need this war. Jim says, all right.

Wyatt asks what Mitch said, and Jim asks how much he spent buying drugs from them. Wyatt asks how much Jim stole from him. Jim has half a mind to let them have Wyatt’s sorry ass. Wyatt says it would be better than being stuck there. Jim says the Malones aren’t playing games; they’ll kill Wyatt. It’s serious business. Wyatt says if Jim hadn’t taken his money, he wouldn’t be in this situation. Jim wonders how he raised such a fool, and Wyatt says Jim’s a fool for taking his money. Jim says he did it for Wyatt’s own good. Every time Wyatt does damage, and Jim digs out of the pile of sh*t, Wyatt makes another one for him to climb into. Wyatt tells Jim, go to hell. Jim says, he might, but Wyatt’s ass better be happy in his room. If the Malones get to it before they get their money, he won’t have an ass left. Jim asks, is this what happens when you get a participation award? Ha-ha! Everyone is cracking me up tonight.

Scott hunts down Roderick at the Artisian. He says he’s with the Attorney General’s office. Roderick asks what he can do for him, and Scott says he can start be not looking nervous. Does he have something to hide? Roderick says, no, and Scott shows him a picture of Candace, asking if he knows her. Roderick says, no, and Scott asks if he mentioned he was an FBI agent; top of his class. Roderick says, good for him. Scott says he rose to the top quickly, and knows Roderick is lying. He’ll ask again; does he know her? Roderick says, no, he doesn’t, and Scott says he wants to make it hard. Okay. He makes a call, asking about Roderick’s real name. Roderick asks what he’s doing, and Scott says, calling Homeland Security. Roderick gets super nervous, and says he remembers; he knows her. Scott hangs up. Roderick asks if he’s getting deported, but Scott says that depends on how much help he’s going to be. They’ve got cameras all around. They can start with surveillance. Where’s security? Roderick leads the way.

Candace asks what Charles is what up to today, and he says, what else? They’re packing up and moving. He’d love for her to see it. She’s excited that she gets to see his house. A house tells a lot about a person. He laughs, and looks out the window. She asks if it’s something interesting, and he says, yeah. America. She calls him Mr. President Elect, and he says she likes the sound of that. She says she likes the sound of him, especially right before that moment. He purrs. He says, no, he doesn’t, and she says, like a kitten. He says he roars like a lion, and she says, a baby lion. Hakuna Matata. There’s a knock at door. A guy who isn’t Landon says he needs to talk to Charles in private, and Candace goes to her adjoining room.

Not-Landon tells Charles, Lisa from the Times is doing a story on Candace, and it’s not a good one. Landon flew NYC to see if he can get the story killed, but he thinks it’s still going to go. Candace blackmailed and damaged several high profile. Her cover was blown when they saw her on TV. Charles says, Landon will take care of it, but not-Landon doesn’t think so. He knows Lisa, and there’s this guy. He shows Charles a picture of the AG, and says, he’s already spoken to the President. They think he’s the one making trouble, and they need to get Candace out of there. Charles asks how long they have, and not-Landon says, it depends on Landon, but he’s pretty sure there’s nothing Landon can do. Charles says, it’s his job, but not-Landon says if they don’t handle this now, it could get messy and nasty. Charles hears him, but doesn’t want Candace to go. Not-Landon knows he likes her, but she’s trouble for him, and them. They need to distance themselves from her. Charles wants her to come. If not-Landon hears from Landon, let him know.

Candace comes back, and asks if everything is okay. He says, just Presidential stuff. She asks what it’s like in the White House. Is there someone to teach you protocol? He says, yeah, and she says she has so many questions. He has to shower, and she offers to join him, but he says, no. He needs a moment.

Candace’s phone rings. It’s Benny. He asks if she’s all right. He saw the news. Is she with him? She says she thinks so, and Benny asks if they’re dating? She says, that’s what it looks like. He tells her, be careful, and she asks, why? He says because he’s her annoying kid brother, and he always has to look out for her. That’s why. She asks if Hanna saw, and what she said. Benny tells her, not much. She’s been acting funny lately. It has something to do with that dude she’s seeing. He says he’ll find out. He asks if Charles knows about everything, and she says he does. Hanna comes down, and there’s a three-way hello. Benny says he’ll call Candace back later.

Benny asks if Hanna is making breakfast, but she says they’ll pick something up on the way to the bank. They’re giving the money back. Benny says he needs to pay Mitch’s family. She says she knows that. She talked to Kathryn, who’s going to give her a loan off of the interest so Benny can pay them. And he’s going to help her pay Kathryn back. She tells him, don’t borrow from people like that no more, and he promises he won’t. The doorbell rings, and Benny says he’ll get it, but Hanna says, don’t. He asks if it’s that dude, and she says she doesn’t want talk to him. Benny says he’s been blowing up her phone all day. What did he do? Hanna says, let it go. Benny says he’ll break Derrick’s neck, but Hanna tells him to tend to his own wounds right now. Derrick just isn’t the man she thought he was. Benny says he told her there was something he didn’t like; he knew it. She says, let it go. Benny wants to know what Derrick did, but she tells him, get dressed. The bell rings again

Tisha tells Madison that she’s sorry. He asks if she’s sure the one who died was African American. She is, and he says, the one they took to the ER? She says, he’s not. They need a relative to ID the body, and Madison says he’ll talk to David. Tisha asks if he’s okay, and he says, no. She tells him again, she’s sorry. Madison tells David they need him to identify the body. David cries. Madison says he is so sorry, and David says take him to his son. Why didn’t we see either one of them though? I’m still thinking there could be a mix-up here.

Scott goes through security footage. He sees Candace follow a guy to his room. Scott says he’ll be taking all the footage, but Roderick says he can’t let him. He needs to call the owner. Scott tells him to do what he feels. He tells the security guy to leave, and asks Roderick what’s going on? A girl pays him, and he gives her money later. It’s happening night after night. Roderick thought he was looking for Candace, but Scott says he’s looking for everything. He wants to know what’s going on – now. Roderick asks if he needs a lawyer. Scott says Roderick needs to tell him what’s going on, or he’s going to be arrested. Spit it out. Roderick wants to call the owner, but Scott says he’ll take Roderick along with the evidence. He asks who the leader of the ring is, and Roderick says, not him. Scott asks if it’s the owner, but he says she’s not aware of it. Scott asks who she is, and Roderick says, Kathryn Cryer is the main owner. There’s a board, but she owns the largest share. Scott says it could make money for her, but Roderick says, it’s small money to her. Scott asks if Roderick is having an affair with her, and he says, no… okay. Scott says he saw the damn tape. Stop lying, and tell him everything. Does her husband know? Roderick says, no. Jim threatened him. Scott says he saw that moment at the bar. It didn’t look pleasant. Roderick says, it wasn’t. Scott asks, who’s in charge? and Roderick finally says, Candace. Scott says, now they’re talking. Does the President know she was a prostitute? Roderick doesn’t know, and Scott says, get her on the phone. Roderick says, she spooks easy; she’ll know right away. Scott says Roderick has been very helpful, but he needs a lot more. Roderick says, if he tells Scott everything, will he still get deported? Scott says that depends on how much he helps. Keep bringing it. Scott asks, who’s this guy? pointing to RK. Roderick says, he works with her. Scott points to Rocky, and says, this guy? Rocky says they’re all in this together. Scott asks, is there a code word? Roderick says if you order whiskey on the rocks with a beer chaser and mudded lime. Scott says, okay. Let’s have some fun.

Madison and David approach the body. David takes a breath. Madison holds his. The cover is lifted, and David says…

Veronica is on a porch, and when someone opens the door, she’s shocked.

Next time, Madison tells David they got a call from that address, Hanna tells Benny they’re giving the money back, and Jim tells Kathryn if they don’t give the Malones $75K cash by the end of the day, they’ll put a hit out on Wyatt.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

It’s the last breakfast in Hawaii. Kyle isn’t feeling well, and can’t afford to be sick. When she gets home, she has to get ready for Farrah’s 30th birthday. Dorit says she’s a little tired and anxious to get home. We see clips of Kyle and Mauricio out the night before. Camille joins the women and Mauricio. In her interview, she says it’s kind of trippy, waking up and being a Mrs. again. Mauricio asks if they’re going anywhere for a honeymoon, and Camille says, Switzerland. Kyle, who can’t seem to keep a lid on it, says she found out something weird. One of the family home of one of Alexia’s friend’s was burglarized. The construction workers were taking a lie detector test, and LVP was there taking one. Camille says, it’s ridiculous. Over a dog? Honestly, I don’t get their reaction to this, since they’re the ones who made the big deal out of calling LVP a liar. Camille says she hasn’t seen anything from LVP. LisaR tries to get her to admit it’s a huge devastation, but Camille says, it’s a little owey. LisaR says LVP doesn’t have to behave that way. Camille thinks it’s hurtful and sad. She wishes LVP could be there for her and dismiss all of this. Kyle says they have to get moving, and Camille thanks them all for coming.

Denise gets home from filming. She finds a gift from LisaR and Harry. The note says, Cheers to you and Aaron. Many happy endings! Eloise lost a tooth, and Denise tells her about the tooth fairy. In her interview, Denise says she’s grateful that Aaron is okay with her being on location with her ex-boyfriend. If their roles were reversed, she doesn’t know if she’d be as understanding. She might say she was, but she’d be a little jealous. Aaron is puzzled about the happy endings remark, and she says she may have done something he won’t be too happy about. We flash back to her telling the story about finding him a happy ending when she went camping. She says she didn’t get into the details, and told them he was mortified. Aaron says, it was awkward. Denise says it might not have been the weirdest thing ever if she hadn’t been a hundred years old. Aaron says, two hundred. She says some of the women were a little judgmental, but they can judge all they want. He says, it’s out there now.

Kyle packs her million pairs of shoes back up. She says it was so much fun. Everyone had a great time. and got along. That in itself is a wedding gift for Camille. In the airport limo, LisaR brings up an article in People magazine about LVP and Camille. Dorit says she was way surprised. LisaR reads that Camille said LVP helped her take a leap of faith, and she respects LVP’s decision not to attend the wedding. In LisaR’s interview, she says Camille tells them one thing, and something different in the article. She doesn’t trust both sides of Camille’s mouth. Because I guess Camille can’t possibly feel more than one way, or maybe felt differently later on. LisaR says Camille needs to own her sh*t, and had better step up. Ha-ha! Or what? Since she can never stop being a big-mouthed jerk, LisaR tells Dorit that Camille says not nice things behind her back. We flash back to Camille saying Dorit makes the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. Dorit says Camille claimed it was great getting to know her. We see a clip from the camping trip where Camille says now that she knows Dorit better, they can move forward. I’d also like to point out that when Camille said that to LisaR, it was way before the camping trip. Dorit says, don’t pretend to be nice.  Kyle tells her that Camille says what she thinks someone wants to hear. Teddi doesn’t care about the article, but at least tell them. I can’t believe none of these women understand how tabloids work.

Dorit tells PK he’s not allowed to have chips. Crunch on carrots. Somehow, I don’t think that’s going to work for him.

Erika asks Tom if he wants to come to a party. She got a text from Kyle, but he suddenly has something else to do. Can’t say I blame him.

Kyle picks up LisaR, who disgusts me at this point. LisaR is going for a mammogram. Both her mom and half-sister had double mastectomies, and she’s a little nervous. Kyle asks what LisaR is wearing to the party, but LisaR wants it to be a surprise. Kyle says there are going to be five hundred people. She still has to get a Ferris wheel. She says the party cost about fifteen Birkin bags. LisaR asks what she remembers about being pregnant the first time. She was screaming and crying, and locked the door when she found out there were so many tests, and the nurse wasn’t having it. Well, that does sound a little insane.

LisaR says, it was quite a weekend. When People magazine came out, she lost her sh*t. She wasn’t happy that she told Dorit that Camille was talking about her, but she felt like she had enough. So let me get this straight. LisaR had enough, so she decided to hurt both Camille and Dorit by telling Dorit that Camille had been talking about her. Okay. Does she ever look in a mirror?

Since Kyle was already scheduled for next week, she jumps on LisaR’s mammo-tails and gets in her appointment now. LisaR says now she can focus on Kyle’s anxiety rather than her own. In Kyle’s interview, she says it gives her anxiety, but her mom died because she didn’t get one. If she’d gone, maybe she’d still be with them. Kyle is haunted by it. In LisaR’s interview, she thinks the anxiety leading up to the test is more frightening than the procedure. The radiologist shows LisaR her results on a laptop, and she’s good. More pictures are wanted from Kyle, and she freaks. In her interview, she says when she was turning thirty, her mom found a lump. Now here she is. They think the see something the day of daughter’s thirtieth birthday.

We all nervously wait. Kyle looks like she going to pass out, and starts crying. She tells LisaR that she has to wait. The radiologist apologizes, and tells Kyle it looks great. LisaR hugs her, and Kyle says she just got scared when they wanted to look again. LisaR says she’s all good, and the radiologist says it was just dense tissue.

Dorit tells PK she doesn’t think anyone will be coming to the party as Karl Lagerfeld, and he says he doesn’t think anyone can compete. In Dorit’s interview, she says she loves Halloween. PK is going as Karl, and she’s his kitty cat, Choupette. PK’s head is sweating in the wig already, and I feel his pain. I have given up on Halloween wigs at parties forever.

LisaR says she has to nail it. In her interview, she says when she dresses up, she’s one hundred million percent. She wants to get as close as she can to the look, and act the part. I’m sure she does. Can I start a Make LisaR Go Away page on Facebook?

Farrah’s party is being set up. Kyle says since Farrah was born on Halloween, they’ve always called it Farrahween. She’s flown Alexia home for the occasion. Kyle asks if Alexia’s dad has seen her outfit, and we see a clip of Mauricio wondering where the rest of it is. Kyle says their mom can dress like a tramp if she wants to. She’s going as a Playboy bunny, and has paid over $600 for what’s basically a black one-piece swimsuit and ears. The tail was an extra $45. If that’s what it means to be rich, I think I could do it better.

No surprise, the decorations are fabulous. Subtler, yet more lavish than Dorinda in the Berkshires. Teddi calls Kyle, who’s stuck in her expensive costume, since the zipper won’t work. She’s waiting for an Uber bringing her another one. Teddi says she’s about a block away, and Kyle asks her to entertain everyone until she figures out what she’s doing. Teddi is dressed as Harley Quinn (me two Halloweens ago), and arrives with Edwin Joker. A vampire jumps out at them. Teddi hates it. Denise follows, in a mini Marie Antoinette dress and wig, with Aaron wearing something Edwardian.

Kyle says she’s literally stuck, and has to pee. Mauricio says he can take it off. He hands her a new costume, and brings her new costume. He rips the back open on the one she’s stuck in, and she gets pissed, saying what if the new one doesn’t work?

Outside, Dorit freaks at the vampire jumping out. Erika says their costumes are clever. I’m surprised that she’s so boring as a leopard or something. LisaR comes as Erika, and Erika loves it. She says she saw herself. It wasn’t her, but it was her at Coachella. She says LisaR nailed it. In her interview, LisaR says, Erika is every girls dream; sexual, over-the-top, and can get away with anything. They start to wonder where Kyle is, and Teddi says, she had a wardrobe malfunction.

Kyle gets her new costume adjusted. Her daughters are like, omg, your butt is hanging out.

Kim arrives dressed as a modernized version of a gangster from the 40s. In LisaR’s interview, she says she was kind of shocked to see Kim. She wishes she’s had a heads up. My Lord, this woman needs to be apprised of everything. It is actually a family party. How shocked can she be? What a lame brain. Maybe they took out brain cells to plump her lips.

Denise can’t breathe in her costume, but Dorit says she looks hot, so that’s all that counts. Camille, as Catwoman, comes with a friend, and the morally corrupt Faye Resnick right behind her. In her interview, Dorit says she’s a fashionista cat, Erika is an exotic cat, and Camille is a stray cat. She wonders where Camille bought a mask to cover both her faces. Okay. Hate her too now. Kyle tells her not to say anything to Camille. In Dorit’s interview, she says she has terrible anxiety, not knowing what Camille said about her, but she just got married and it’s Farrah’s birthday. Oh gee. Think you might be able to control yourself for a whole evening? Denise says she’s always clueless, and we flash back to Denise saying she’s lost during one of the many Puppygate convos.

The birthday girl comes out, and we see Mauricio as Hugh Hefner. In Kyle’s interview, she says, earlier, she was facing the worst thing, and it’s a reminder to celebrate family and friends when you get the chance. She takes the mic, and says Farrah is an inspiration, and she can’t believe she has a child who’s thirty. In her interview, she says it’s every parent’s dream to see their child grow to be a responsible adult; self-sufficient, smart, and successful. She’s proud of Farrah, and proud of the job she and Mauricio did. They kind of know what they’re doing. She tells everyone to take a ride on Farrah’s wheel. The DJ begins to play music, and everyone dances. In her interview, Kyle says she got a silver Rolex for her thirtieth birthday. In Erika’s interview, she says she went to Vegas. Dorit says she had a surprise luncheon in Connecticut, and didn’t have Ferris wheel.

Kyle talks to the women about her mammogram. She suggests a spin on the wheel, and Dorit wants to know why they have to be first. Kyle’s seatbelt is stuck, much like her first costume. In Teddi’s interview, she says she promised not to bring anything up to Camille, but they ended up side by side. Kyle says, FML when she gets stuck at the top.

There’s a photographer, and the women get a group shot taken. LisaR, in character as Erika, tells Kim that giving the bunny back to LisaR was something [bleep]. In her interview, Kim says she and LisaR don’t have a good history. We flash back to several episodes where LisaR acted incredibly nosy and rude to Kim, ending with her returning the bunny to LisaR at the reunion. Because it lacked good energy. She says she didn’t mean to be crude, rude, or disrespectful, but she feels attacked. She’s not hearing anything from LisaR but see you next Tuesday. LisaR likes being Erika.

Kim asks Dorit if that wasn’t wrong on LisaR’s part. It was upsetting. Kyle says, it was uncalled for. Kim says, it was inappropriate and rude. Kyle thinks LisaR is holding a grudge. In Kim’s interview, she says LisaR is always looking for attention. Denise joins them, and Kim whines that LisaR was rude to her. In Denise’s interview, she says LisaR is one of her best friends (I’m sorry), and was hurt by the bunny situation. She tells Kim that she really hurt LisaR’s feelings. Kim doesn’t believe it. In her interview, Kim says Denise should stand back. This is between her and LisaR. Let it go. Kyle says Kim isn’t wrong, and to give her that. It wasn’t okay. Denise is sorry that Kim is feeling hurt. Kim says she’s not, and Denise asks what’s the problem then. Kyle doesn’t think Denise gets it. Denise says, who cares about some bunny? They need to let it go. Well, here’s the thing, Denise. LisaR is the one who brought it up. Hello? Is this thing on?

LisaR says she’s Erika tonight, and admits to saying something about the bunny. Dorit observes that there are still strong feelings about it. In her interview, Kim says there are two years of unresolved energy. We flash back to Kim calling out LisaR on saying Kim was near death when she was nothing of the kind. Erika wishes it was different between them. In her interview, LisaR says, giving back the bunny was rude. Kim asks Erika/LisaR if they’re good, and says she wants to get a message to LisaR. Denise suggests LisaR be herself in the moment. Kim asks to have a private chat, and they sit.

Kim tells LisaR that she’s not looking for a fight, and LisaR looks beautiful. LisaR realizes she’s been over-the-top in character. Kim asks if she wants to say she’s sorry, but LisaR says Kim still hasn’t apologized for the bunny moment. Kim says, what about her? They used to have a nice relationship, and she’d be happy to go back to that, but LisaR has to be nice. LisaR agrees what she did wasn’t appropriate, but neither was what Kim did. Kim asks if LisaR can’t see her side. In Kim’s interview, she says there’s a lot of damage to repair. She doesn’t regret giving back the bunny. She was hurt by a lot of things LisaR did. LisaR says Kim caught her off-guard. She was scared to see Kim, and reacted that way. In her interview, LisaR says Kim giving the bunny back was the most hurt she’s been by this group. We flash back to Kim giving LisaR back the bunny, and tears streaming down LisaR’s face. She says it was like a gut punch. Sorry. I have no sympathy for her. Kim can be a nut, but LisaR dogged her the whole season. And if that’s the most hurt LisaR has been, she doesn’t know what hurt is. She says she’s sorry for what happened between them. Can they move on? Kim suggests forgiving each other. LisaR is glad their having this conversation under a dead angel. They hug, and Kim says, miracles happen. You never know.

Next time, Brandi (bleh) meets with Denise (I love Denise, but not so much her choice of friends), Camille says Teddi has gotten too big for her britches, Kyle plans a girls trip to France, and Camille’s house burns down.

🐍 LisaR autocorrects to lizard. Just sayin’…

💩 Stupidest. Sh*t. Ever.

One more reason to look at LisaR with disgust.


I rarely tweet, but I had to reply to this nonsense. You can say she was thoughtless. You can say the joke was tasteless or inappropriate. You can say a lot of things, but LVP is not transphobic. You, however, are a real piece of work, who should not be so proud of her big mouth.

But LVP remains a lady, acknowledging a poor choice of words.


And Vanderpump still rules.


🎡 Some Housewives Fun…

Just to balance it a little.


💸 The Breakup…

Did Fifty/Fitty/Fofty come between Lala and her man?


Just because I didn’t even know Perez Hilton was still alive.


👑 Because Why Not?

And because Candace gave me an earworm.




January 25, 2019 – Robert Has Intel, Chefs in the Black, a Thief, a Question, Lucky Number Quotes & Rock


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Sam wakes up next to Jason. She touches his face and he wakes. She says, it’s real, and he says, yeah; it’s happening. They kiss and exchange I love yous. Then get busy.

Carly sees Drew at the MetroCourt. She asks how Oscar is, and he says, they released him this morning. He asks about Josslyn, and Carly says they had a long talk. Carly understands what they were trying to do; live like there’s no tomorrow. Drew says, Josslyn has a tomorrow.

Elizabeth tells Franco that she’d mainline coffee if she could. She hardly slept. He says, boys are awful; kids are mean. Aiden asks if he can play video games. Elizabeth thought he didn’t like them anymore, but Aiden tells her Jake said he’d play with him. She tells him, no online games. When Aiden is out of earshot, Jake asks if it’s because of what told them. Franco says it’s good he told them, and Elizabeth says she’s proud of him, looking after his little brother. Jake says he’ll make sure Aiden stays offline. He leaves, and Franco asks Elizabeth what’s up. She doesn’t know if Aiden is gay, or what that even means at this point.

At the station, Peter tells Anna that she didn’t have to stay all night. If he needs a lawyer, he’ll hire one. She says, in the meantime, she can help him with which questions to answer, and what to stay away from. He tells her that he doesn’t need saving. Maxie walks in, and asks if he’s sure about that.

Laura sits at Lulu’s bedside. She says the doctors are pleased with how she came through surgery, but she knew Lulu was a fighter. Their job is done. The rest is up to her. She needs to wake up. It’s time for her to open her eyes. Sonny comes to the door, and asks if it’s a bad time. Laura hugs him.

Not-Doc asks Ava how long he has to wait. She says, as long as the doctors tell him to. She can’t believe he’s in the medical field himself, and he says, they say doctors make the worst patients. He’s anxious to find out if his eyesight has been restored. Finn says his surgeon is here. It’s Griff, and Finn wonders if that’s a problem. Ava says, no, and Finn says he’ll leave them to it.

Robert is in the hallway, and says Finn is just the man he’s looking for. Can Finn get his ex to return one of his calls? Finn says, good to see him, and Robert asks, how’s the scar from the tracker installation? Finn says Robert makes a better spy than surgeon. Robert says he has intel on Anna’s sudden blindness.

Peter tells Maxie that she didn’t have to come. She says Laura promised to keep in touch. She asks how he is, and he says, better, now that she’s there. He wants her to tell Anna to go home. Anna says she’s not going anywhere. Jordan comes out, and says she has a few more questions. Peter tells Maxie that she doesn’t have to stay, but Maxie tells him, she’ll stay right there, and he goes into the interrogation room with Anna and Jordan. Peter doesn’t understand what’s happening, and Anna says he’s a suspect, and suggests he start acting serious. Jordan says the sooner he answers, the sooner she can eliminate him as a suspect. She shows him the shoe print, and says they found it at the crime scene. It’s a common type of shoe, and she noticed it matches the exact shoes he has on. Peter looks at Anna.

Laura says she held Sonny’s hand during Lulu’s surgery, now she needs to wake up. He says, she will. She asks if he’s gotten in touch with Dante, and he says he’s doing everything he can to reach him. Laura hates that he’s not there for Lulu. Sonny says Dante will hate it worse, if by the time they get to him, they’re giving him good news of a full recovery. Laura says, from his mouth to God’s ear. He says, she’s going to pull through. She’s strong, determined, and look who her mother is. Laura holds back tears

Carly tells Drew she’s glad both kids are okay. He is too, and she says they’re also clear on what not to do moving forward. Drew says. it’s a delicate balance. He wants Oscar to live life to the fullest, but at the same time, he wants to keep Oscar safe. Carly is so sorry. She doesn’t know how he’s standing. He says Scout helps. She makes him smile, no matter how the day is. I know what he means. I feel the same way about my dogs. He says, clearly, there are moments and people to be grateful for.

Jason makes breakfast, and Sam is blown away. Normally, her breakfast is something that goes from the freezer into the toaster oven. This is decadent. She says it’s familiar, but strange. Jason suggests they take it day by day, with no pressure to figure it all out now. He tells her that he’s hooking up with Spinelli today. She says Spinelli didn’t tell her, but the last time they talked, things were chaotic. Jason says Spinelli has been doing research, and looked into the emails from Linda Black. Jason gets a text that Spinelli’s plane is about to land. They’re going to meet at the MetroCourt. He offers to have Spinelli meet him at her place, but Sam says, no; he should go. She wants to get closer to figuring out what’s going on. Jason asks, what’s going on? and she tells him, don’t laugh. It feels like they’re back to the last time they were together. They were happy. He walked out, and she didn’t see him for five years. He says, this is different, and she says, why, because it’s light out? He says because he’s not walking into a dangerous situation, as far as he knows. He’s coming back. She tells him, sorry. She was having an irrational moment. It will pass. He says he’ll text when he gets there.

Sonny tells Laura, the police set up a tip line for leads on the killer. He wants to make a contribution to the reward. Laura wishes the didn’t have to offer a reward, but Sonny says it’s an incentive to come forward. She says it’s generous of him, and thanks him, but has to admit she has second thoughts about the tip line. The commissioner briefed her on the calls, and a few were well-meaning, but the majority were disturbing or from attention seekers. Sonny knows it’s frustrating, but still holds out hope. It only takes one person. Laura says, one person to lead them to the monster who did this to her girl.

Ava tells Griff that he looks like hell. What happened to his forehead? He has a cut above his eyebrow, and he says he had a shaving accident. She says he must have bad aim. Not-Doc asks if he should request a different doctor, but Griff says he’s capable of determining the success of the surgery. He takes not-Doc’s bandages off. Ava asks if he sees anything, and he says, only the most beautiful woman in the world. She kisses and hugs him.

Jordan asks Peter the size of his shoe, but Anna says, don’t answer. He says, twelve, and he’ll be happy to take his shoe off right now so they can examine it. Jordan says she might take him up on that. Anna asks if she can say if they’re the same size. Jordan says, if Peter is telling the truth, they’re not a match, but they still can’t be certain he’s not the attacker. Peter was the last person to talk to Lulu, and remains a suspect. Peter says he couldn’t possibly be the attacker. The night Kiki was killed, he was at Jordan’s wedding the entire night.

Peter comes out, and Jordan asks him to wait while they verify something. Maxie asks, what’s going on? and Peter says they can rule out him killing Kiki. Maxie says she can attest to him being at the wedding from start to finish. She tells Anna that Peter is in the clear, and Peter says she can go. Anna leaves.

Elizabeth tells Franco she was blindsided last night. Now she’s had time to think about what it means. Franco asks, what? but she doesn’t say anything. He wants to ask her a question, and wants her to be 100% honest; he won’t judge. If it turns out Aiden is gay, would it be a problem?

Jason texts Sam that he’s safe at the MetroCourt. Carly sees him, and hugs him. He’s like, ow, because his ribs are sore. She thinks he should get checked out, but he says he’s fine. She says he doesn’t know that, and he doesn’t have hypothermia, does he? He asks if he looks like he does. She says when he said he swam from the harbor, she assumed the worst. He says he’s better than he’s been in six years. She promises to be gentle, hugs him again, and says she’s so happy for him and Sam. It’s about time.

Robert tells Finn he’s been doing research on Anna’s virus. He has intel, but she won’t return his calls. Finn says she’s dealing with her son at the police station. Robert says he’s shocked Anna’s offspring is in trouble. He asks Finn to make sure Anna gets the information, giving him a folder. He understands they’ve shacked up. Emma told him. Finn say the whole family is involved. Robert says if he plans on sticking around, get used to it. His ex is high maintenance. Good luck. Finn says he can handle it. Robert says he thinks he can. The elevator opens, and Anna comes out. Robert asks if her ears were burning. They were just talking about her.

Maxie tells Peter that he should consider being nicer to Anna. He says he’s being questioned about a murder, that obviously Anna thinks he’s capable of committing. The police are just doing their due diligence. Maxie says Anna is his mother. Of course she’s exaggerating the danger. She’s worried, and mothers do that. She reminds him of rushing James to the hospital. Mothers overreact. As a mom, she’s all in favor of kids forgiving their moms. Peter tells her, he’s not saying he hasn’t, but maybe. Maxie asks if he can let her in; nothing bad will happen. He says he’s slow to trust. Maybe he has room for one a yea. He’ll focus on Anna next year. Maxie asks who it is this year, and he smiles.

Carly tells Jason that she has a million questions, but won’t ask. What happened is his business, but please let her tell Sonny. Jason says, go ahead. She’s happy, and knew it was going to happen. She was right. He thanks her for believing in them. She says now she has to run his life, and he asks how that’s any different. She says she wasn’t crazy about Sam at the start, but Sam loves Jason for himself, not for what she thinks he could be. She’s not trying to change him. She might almost be worthy of him.

Jason gets a text that Spinelli’s plane is stuck on the tarmac. He tells Carly that Spinelli flew in this morning, but he came there for no reason. Carly says he came there to tell his best friend good news. He seems lighter; like a weight has been lifted off. He says the hardest thing about coming back was seeing Sam torn in two. She questioned herself, and struggled to make an impossible situation okay. She would have hated for him to take off, so he stayed, and let her make her own choice. Carly says, of course she chose him. It’s always been him. Sam is the love of his life. He says he has to be getting back, and thanks her.

Elizabeth asks what Franco means. Lucas is family. He says she’s not answering the question. She can’t believe he asked. Of course she’d have no problem. He knows she’d love Aiden, no matter what. He says he’ll rephrase the question. She says, Aiden being happy is all that matters. He can be proud, because they live in a time when he can be who he is. Franco says some people might disagree. The world is a scary place. There are people out there who don’t see things the way they do.

Laura tells Sonny that she’s scared. They’re part of an undesirable club. They both know, sometimes the worst can really happen. She cries, and Sonny says, but it didn’t happen. Lulu fought off the killer, and the doctors got to her in time. She’s going to wake up and be okay, and she’ll have her mother by her side. Laura hugs him and thanks him for coming. He tells her if she needs anything, let him know. He tells Lulu, don’t stop fighting your way back.

Griff tells not-Doc, like Anna, he’s made an exceptionally quick recovery. Whatever the virus is, it only requires minor surgery to correct. Not-Doc asks if he can leave, but Griff would like to run some tests first. Not-Doc says as long as it doesn’t take too long. He has pressing matters to attend to. In Lulu’s room, Laura strokes her hair.

Sam refuses to call Jason. She talks to herself, saying she can text, how was flight? Then she says, no, and puts the phone down. She tells herself that she’s not crazy. Jason is in a meeting with Spinelli. Everything is okay. She’s not calling him.

Elizabeth tells Franco that she realizes there are more struggles in life for Aiden than his brothers. She hates it, but people in general are more accepting than when they grew up. They’re lucky to be in a city that fights against discrimination. She tells him, in some cities, it’s legal to fire someone for being gay. Franco says, someone has been on the internet. She says, they have something else to focus on besides whether Aiden is gay or not. They need to stop the bullying.

Maxie tells Peter a story about James breaking his grandmother’s window with a baseball already. She thinks James can go pro. Peter says his uncle will be cheering him on. Jordan comes back, and says the video footage confirms he was at the wedding, and has nothing to do with the murder. He asks if he’s free to go, and Jordan says, don’t leave town. He says he has no plans go anywhere. He looks at Maxie, and they hug.

Anna asks what Robert is doing there. Robert says she wanted information, and he thought if it was so important, he’d bring it himself. She asks if they don’t have people for that, or has his budget been cut? Robert looks at Finn, and says, high maintenance or high maintenance? Finn says she’s overthinking. Robert shows her a paper from the folder, and asks if a name jumps out at the bottom of the page. Who else worked with Dr. Cabot? She says, Kevin Collins.

Speaking of which, what happened to the real Doc, Kevin Collins? Last we left him, he was hatching a plan to save Laura. I’d say it’s a fail so far.

Laura says Lulu has always run on her own schedule, even when she was a tiny little girl. No one could rush her. So she’s going to try and be patient; let her wake up in her own time, but if could hurry a little bit, that would be great. Lulu squeezes Laura’s hand, and Laura says her name.

Carly says she has something to tell him that he can’t tell anyone. Sonny asks if he’s being indicted. Sam and Jason are back together. He says she’s been claiming that’s going to happen. She’s excited for them, and wants Sonny to tell her that she’s right. He says she’s right, and they hug.

Sam looks at her phone and paces. Jason comes in. She runs to him and hugs him. He says he told her he’d come back.

Jake and Aiden ask for a snack and soda. Elizabeth says yes to the snack, and no to soda. She says, it’s too early for sugar, but they can split a cupcake. Aiden starts to say it makes no sense, but Jake interrupts, saying they can still have a cupcake. Elizabeth hugs Aiden, saying she’s so proud of him. He runs to join Jake in the kitchen. Franco says, it’s going to be fine. She knows.

Maxie tells Peter that she has to pick up James. He’s at his grandmother’s, who only allows beachballs now. She asks if he wants to come. James would love to see him. Peter says not as much as he wants to see James.

Ava says she hopes Griff is taking care of himself. He says it’s just a cut. She says she doesn’t care, but Kiki did. She doesn’t think he’d want to disrespect her memory. Griff doesn’t want to talk about her. Ava says, talk about Lulu then. She understands the surgery went well. Griff says, Dr. Lacey is hopeful, and his prognosis is that Lulu will pull through. He confirms it looks that way. Ava says, when she does. Lulu can give her the name of the bastard who killed her daughter.

Laura asks if Lulu just squeezed her hand, and Lulu does it again. Laura tells her, good job. She’s getting the doctor. Laura jets, and Lulu’s hand moves.

Anna says it’s listed that Doc worked with Cabot. Finn says he claimed to have no connection to the Bureau or Cabot. Anna says, he lied. She wonders why he would do that.

Lulu opens her eyes. She sees not-Doc approaching her bed. He looms over her, and says, hello, Lulu.

On Monday, Shiloh says the mystery is solved, Robert says Doc may have had a secret life, and not-Doc tells Lulu not to fight it.

🔥 On tonight’s Hell’s Kitchen, the newly black-jacketed chefs had to recreate Gordon’s Eggs Benedict, while guessing the secret ingredients in the hollandaise. Seeing Heather’s eggs, for the first time ever in the history of Hell’s Kitchen, I thought I could do a better job. Gordon wouldn’t even eat Bret’s offering. There was stern talk about broken hollandaise, whatever that is, and Heather, Bret, and Motto were stuck on the obligatory clean-up duty. Ariel and Mia won the challenge, and some indoor skydiving. Not only was both Canadian bacon and prosciutto a factor, shallots and paprika were the secret to the sauce, and both chefs had each gotten one. The remaining chefs were also allowed to tag along on the outing. Bret did some tagging on the kitchen wall using Scrubbing Bubbles. The restaurant was crowded with everyone from a Rams quarterback to actors I’ve never heard of. It was the first time the chefs were going to be working together as one team. Mia was the worst, flustered as hell (no pun intended). After dinner service, Gordon said they had a great start, but couldn’t maintain It. It looked like Mia was going out the door, but in a surprise move, it was Heather; two chefs nominating her. She said her goal had been to be a good example for her son, and she achieved that. Next time, an intoxicating episode where Gordon is left speechless. Not even a bleep.

🔎 Sounds Like An Inside Job…

Geez. Lala turns her back for one second.


🌴 Temptation Island Is Back…


☝ Quotes of the Week

I am almost inclined to set it up as a canon, that a children’s story which is enjoyed only by children, is a bad children’s story. The good ones last. A waltz which you can like only when you are waltzing, is a bad waltz.C.S. Lewis, On Stories

Fill your mind with knowledge — it’s the only kind of power no one can take away from you.Min Jin Lee, Pachinko

I was built to fire once. Like a musket. – Doug (Kevin James), King of Queens

I’m drawing the line. Do not read the Latin. – Marty (Fran Kranz), Cabin in the Woods

A dead Cheerleader isn’t great for morale. – Coach Parker (Sean McNabb), Cheerleader Nightmare (Lifetime)

What do you have to lose? Certainly not your virginity. – Aalsa, 76-year-old, on dating younger men, Dr. Phil

Catfishing is when you go on the internet and pretend to be someone you’re not. You know, like everyone on the internet. – Caroline (Beth Behrs), 2 Broke Girls

🎷 May Your Weekend Do It Too…