Tag Archives: Southern Charm New Orleans

June 28, 2019 – Kim Asks Shiloh For a Favor, NOLA Charm, a Peek At Chefs, Nasty NeNe, Four Cups Of 90 Tea, Three Wives, Two Pump Rules, DecaQuotes & Weekend Heap


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Nina welcomes Drew back. She asks if he’s got a second. She wants to tell him what’s going on around there. He asks her to be specific, and she says she would have appreciated a heads up that he was selling Aurora. He tells her not to take it personally. He didn’t consult any employees. She says he knows how much Crimson means to her. When she was introduced to Jax, she thought he was a great guy, and someone she could work with. Jax stands in the doorway, but her back is to him. She tells Drew, he sabotaged her with the first project. Maybe not he’s not such a great guy, and just pretending. He said he wanted to build Crimson up, but maybe what he really wanted was a tax write-off. She’s asking why he sold her beloved magazine to a playboy who buys and sells companies like vintage handbags. Jax says that’s the first time he’s heard that metaphor.

At the MetroCourt, Curtis tells Valentin that his background check cleared. He’s starting today. Valentin wants to know everything, and says, no detail is too small. Curtis says Jax pleaded nolo contendere to an FCC violation, and it cost him millions. He took a plea so his brother and father could walk. He had to take a loss, but after five years, ended up back on top. Valentin wonders what corners he cut.

Sasha leaves Michael a message. She guesses his project is keeping him busy. She hopes he can make it tonight.

Michael meets Sonny and Carly at the hospital. He apologizes for being late, and says, it’s been a wild 24 hours. Carly asks what he and Jason got into in Beecher’s Corners. He says, it’s a long story. Jason got arrested, and he helped break him out. Carly says, he helped break Jason out of jail? Michael says he looked like an innocent bystander. Don’t worry. Carly says she is, and Sonny says, what the hell? Michael says it was bad timing, but they did find a witness. Carol Lockhart confirmed that Shiloh is a murderer.

Shiloh tells Kim that Oscar spoke often about her. What kind of woman she is; strong, fierce, and loving. Kim says Oscar was angry at her when he was living at the DOD house. Shiloh says, love and anger are different sides of the same coin. It shows how much he loved her that it was shining through in the midst of their difficulties. He knows her loss is immeasurable, and he’s sorry. She says, Oscar’s not lost. She feels him, but it’s not enough. She wants him back for real, and she knows how, but nobody wants to help her. Will he help bring Oscar back? He takes her hands, and says, of course (🍷). He’d do anything to help her. She says she needs to be mother. She tried to explain to Drew, but he didn’t understand. She can’t do it alone, and wants help. He says he needs her to say the words. She wants him to father a child with her?

In the interrogation room, Willow doubts any prisoner get chamomile tea before lights out, and Chase says she’s a special case. The judge might be completely misguided, but he thinks he’s doing the right thing. She asks if Chase thinks she should cooperate, and he says he thinks there’s a better way to protect Wiley than sitting in a jail cell.

Lucas tells Brad that Bobbie thanks them for giving her Wiley this evening. It gives her incentive to manage her treatment. Brad says, it’s the magic touch. Lucas says Alexis called, and asks why Brad didn’t tell him that he’d talked to her. Brad says Lucas had so much going on with his mom’s diagnosis, and he didn’t know how to tell him that her strategy is to reveal Wiley is Shiloh’s son. Lucas says it makes sense, but Brad says as soon as they admit it, Shiloh can claim him. Lucas says, then the case will be judged on their merits. Getting out in front of it is their best chance of retaining Wiley. Brad says, Alexis is wrong, and thinks they should take Wiley and run. Pack the car, get the hell out of Port Charles, and never look back.

Michael tells Sonny and Carly, when Shiloh was arrested, he had Carol brought to him, and convinced her to make a false confession. She had nothing to do with his death. Michael’s phone dings, and he says, dammit. He had dinner plans with Sasha. Carly says, go. It sounds like he could use a night out. He tells them, good luck, and leaves. Sonny says he’s texting Brick about following up on his plans for Dev. Some steps need to be taken before he can become a citizen. Carly wants to know what’s going on, but Dr. Navarro is ready. They go into the examining room.

Kim says she’s giving Shiloh the wrong idea. She appreciates his support, and that he’d be willing to go that far, but she wants a baby that’s part her and part Drew, like Oscar. Shiloh says obviously he can’t help her on that front. She says she could use some guidance. After Oscar died, she read all his DOD literature, and the notes he took. Some of the classes caught her attention. He asks which classes? and she says the ones on persuasive arguments, and how to get through on a spiritual level. Can he teach her how to get through to Drew? He asks if she wants him to teach her how to persuade Drew to have another child with her. She wants Drew to understand the importance of it. She already suggested it, but he doesn’t remember loving her. What they had is lost. It’s on the flashdrive with Drew’s other memories. Shiloh says she and Drew don’t have a relationship. Is she in a relationship with anyone else? She says she’s seeing Julian, but he turned her down before she realized Drew has to be the father. Julian has a lot on his mind anyway. He has some custody issue going on with his son.

Brad says, Seattle, Nashville, Chicago; it’s up to Lucas. Lucas says, no. This is crazy. Running isn’t an option. Brad says they have every right to move, and no obligation to stay. Lucas says, so they pack up and move to North Dakota. The suit will still proceed, and when the truth comes out, it will be assumed they knew Shiloh didn’t give his permission. They’ll be culpable. They’ll be fugitives, and if they’re caught, there’s no way they’ll keep their son. Brad says Lucas’s brother-in-law is an expert at making people disappear. Sonny can help. Lucas says, if they disappear, they and Wiley can never contact their family again. Is that what he wants for their child?

Willow asks if Chase thinks the only way to protect Wiley is to tell Shiloh the baby is his. Chase says she has more agency than she realizes. She can convince the judge that Shiloh is a threat to Wiley’s well-being. She says it will give Shiloh legal claim to Wiley. The only way to protect him is to not disclose Shiloh is his father. Chase says she’ll be in contempt of court. She says she is already, and he asks how much longer she thinks she can keep this up. She says as long as she has to, even if it’s the rest of her life.

Nina says it’s convenient Jax is there, and he asks, how’s that? She says instead of expressing her concerns to Drew, she should be expressing her concerns to the source. He asks if that’s what she was doing, expressing her concerns? It sounded a bit disparaging. Maybe something was lost in the translation. Drew says he’d like to help, but whatever dispute they have, it’s not his business. The terms of the sale are clear. Jax says he’s the sole owner of the print division, and Drew is the sole owner of the TV, radio, and streaming platforms. While they’re under the same umbrella, they operate independently. Drew says, sorry. Nina doesn’t work for him. She works for Jax.

Curtis says he still has paperwork to fill out, and Valentin doesn’t want to keep him. Next time, he wants something viable. Curtis says he can’t give him anything if nothing is there, but Valentin is sure he’ll find plenty. Curtis leaves, and Valentin approaches Sasha’s table. He asks if the seat is taken, and she says, it will be soon. He says he’ll warm it up. He’s been wanting to connect. Sasha says, about…? He tells her, the wedding is in September in Verona, and she says, like Romeo and Juliet. He says after the wedding, she’s free to go home to Chappaqua. She says, there’s been a change of plans. She’s decided to make Port Charles her home for good.

Michael comes to the interrogation room, and says he’s glad both Willow and Chase are there. He’s not glad Willow is in custody, but he wanted to talk to them both. He asks Willow how much she told Chase about her father, and she says, he knows everything. Her father intentionally OD’s because she chose her initiation ceremony over him. Michael says, that’s not what happened. She says she knows he’s being kind, but takes full responsibility. She came to terms with it a long time ago. Michael says her father didn’t commit suicide. He’s sorry tell her, but her father was murdered.

Dr. Navarro comes into the examining room, and asks if Carly or Sonny have any questions or concerns. Carly says they’re just ready to see how the baby is doing. Sonny asks if she thinks there are any complications. She says the protein levels can signify a number of things, but most are benign or manageable. She does a sonogram, and says, the baby is approximately twelve inches long, and… Sonny asks if everything is all right. She says she needs to consult with a colleague. She tells Carly to get dressed, and she’ll be back. Carly asks if something is wrong with the baby, but the doctor says she can’t give Carly a prognosis until she has a consult.

Jax says Nina was a major factor in his decision to buy Aurora. Nina says she thought he wanted to stay in Port Charles because of his daughter. He says she’ll always be his first consideration, but when he assesses a potential investment property, he looks at both the property and the personnel, and he wanted to keep her. He respects her opinion, but wants to make it clear, it’s his magazine. Nina says if he wants his magazine to be better, he needs to give her plenty of room. He says she’s putting Ava on the cover. How much room does she need? Nina says she hates Ava, but it will give the magazine a profile boost. He agrees, and says they’re on the same side. Drew wonders if it’s too much to ask that they shake hands and go about their day. Curtis comes to the door, and asks if it’s a good time. Drew says, it’s a great time. Nina asks why Curtis didn’t tell her that he was in the running for head of security. He says he didn’t want to jinx it, but she says she could have put in a good word. Jax says, his background speaks for itself. Drew says he could have pulled some strings for him, but Curtis says he wanted to get the job on his own without anyone clearing the way.

Willow says her father wasn’t murdered, and Michael says, it’s a lot to process. He and Jason went to see Carol in Beecher’s Corners. Willow says Carol is the one her father got the drugs from, but Michael says, she was brought before Shiloh, who convinced her to confess so he could be exonerated. He’d been arrested, and told her he’d been scapegoated. He said DOD would fall apart unless someone sacrificed themselves to exonerate him, so she went to the police and lied. Willow asks why Shiloh would kill her father. Michael says her father wanted her out of DOD, and Shiloh couldn’t let that happen.

Shiloh tells Kim that he wasn’t aware Julian had a son young enough be in a custody battle. She says, it’s actually his grandson. His son Lucas has a baby boy. Shiloh says, Brad is his husband. Odd that he hasn’t seen Brad lately. Kim says, a baby can hijack your life. Everything else takes a backseat. He asks her to tell him more, but she doesn’t know the specifics. She was focused on Oscar, and didn’t ask. She knows it’s a source of stress for Julian. He’s concerned the biological father will make a bid for custody, and Julian thinks he’s a dangerous man. I ask Kim, why? Why are you telling him this?

Lucas tells Brad, if they skip town, they’ll have to change their identities. They can never tell Wiley who he is, and he’ll grow up in a lie, thinking he’s someone else. Is that the kind of life Brad wants for their son? Lucas doesn’t, or for them. Brad says, if it keeps Shiloh away from Wiley, it will be worth it. Lucas says he’s right. Keeping Wiley from Shiloh is the most important thing. They can’t break the law, and have to be smart about it. He thinks Alexis is right. He thinks they have to be honest about who Wiley’s father is. Well this is going to be interesting when the DNA doesn’t match.

Nina and Curtis say they’ll catch up soon. Nina leaves, but in the hallway, Jax asks her to wait. He tells her, congratulations on the early ad sales. It’s quite a feat. Ava is creating a buzz. Well done. She says she wanted to talk to him about Josslyn interning at Crimson. He says sometimes he forgets he has a teenage daughter, and can’t make her decisions for her. Nina says she tripped over the same stone with her daughter Sasha. When they met, she tried way too hard, and had to remind herself that Sasha is an adult, and doesn’t need her input on everything. She’s glad she and Valentin have a few years left before Charlotte is independent. Jax says they have common ground. The most important thing to them is their daughters.

Valentin says the time for Sasha to return is after the wedding. She says she doesn’t have much going on in Chappaqua since he recruited her to be Nina’s daughter. He says, timing is everything, and they agreed. She says she didn’t expect it to pan out the way it did. She cares about Nina, and Port Charles feels like home. She has a stake in this too. He says not much of one compared to him, and she says, it’s not about him. She has other reasons. He says, Michael?

Chase asks Michael if there’s any corroborating evidence. Michael says Carol is willing to go on record with her story, but a cop stopped her and Jason before they could leave. Willow asks if it was Billy Price, and Michael says it was. She asks how they got away, but Chase says he’s cutting Michael off here for his own good. Willow wonders if her mother knew Shiloh was planning on killing her father. Michael says, if she didn’t, this might open her eyes. It would help a lot if she’d stop protecting Shiloh. Willow doesn’t believe her mom could do that. Shiloh must have lied to her too. Michael promises it will all work out, and she thanks him. Michael leaves, and she says she can’t believe this. Shiloh timed her initiation so that she’d be busy, and her dad would be alone. She says, oh, God. She slept with him after he killed he father. Chase holds her as she quietly freaks about that.

Kim thanks Shiloh for coming by, and he says he’s glad to be of service. She opens the door, and Julian is there. He asks what the hell Shiloh is doing there? and Shiloh says he was just leaving. When he’s gone, Julian asks Kim why he was there. She says she was just asking for advice, but Julian says he doesn’t trust Shiloh around women. There’s a lot she doesn’t know about him.

Carly tells Sonny, it feels like hours. He says the doctor has a procedure, and she’s playing it safe. Dr. Navarro comes back, and Carly asks her to please tell them what’s wrong with their baby. The doctor explains that there’s a pocket of fluid preventing part of the spinal cord from protection. The bones haven’t fused. She says it’s spina bifida, and Sonny asks how serious it is. She says they won’t know until after the birth. Many babies with spina bifida go on to lead thriving lives. Carly says, but not all, and the doctor says in some cases it can lead to developmental impairment.

Brad runs into Charlie’s, looking for Julian. The bartender says he took off, and to try his cell. Shiloh comes in, and says he’s glad he caught Brad.

Kim says Julian is telling her the man her son went to for spiritual guidance has been drugging women and coercing them to have sex? Why didn’t he tell her sooner? She even read Shiloh’s book, so she would feel closer to Oscar. Julian says all he knew was Alexis had reservations. He didn’t know Shiloh was a sexual predator until Sam told him that Kristina had gotten involved with DOD. She’s lucky she got out before Shiloh hurt her. Kim says she’s in shock. She was hanging on his every word. Julian asks why Shiloh was there, and she says she wanted some help from somebody. He says that’s why he’s there. He’s worried about her, and so is Drew. Kim asks if Drew told him what happened; that she wanted to have a baby with him.

Valentin asks Sasha how much she knows about Michael. She says he’s got a huge, complicated family, and he’s genuinely kind, a rare quality. Valentin says, he also heads a major corporation, and has a significant amount of the Quartermaine fortune. She says she’s not after his money, but Valentin says, if Michael hasn’t investigated her yet, someone from his huge, complicated family will. He vetted her, and knows she’ll stand up to scrutiny, but if they go sniffing around, they’ll find out she’s not Nina’s daughter. She promises Michael’s family has no reason to go digging into her background. They’re not serious. He’s just a nice guy she enjoys spending time with. Valentin says he speaks from experience; lying to someone you love is a special kind of pain. You wonder every day if you’ll get discovered and lose everything. If she has any sense at all, she’ll get out now. He leaves, and Michael arrives.

Dr. Navarro tells Carly that they’ll monitor the situation, and determine the severity as it gets closer to the birth. She’ll need to have a C-section. Sonny asks if Carly is at higher risk, but the doctor says, no. Any surgery is a risk, but it’s relatively low. Carly asks if it’s anything she did or didn’t do that contributed, but Dr. Navarro says she did nothing to cause the condition. She leaves to give them some privacy, telling them to contact her anytime if they have questions. Sonny holds Carly, and she cries a little.

Sasha tells Michael that she was worried he stood her up. He says, sorry for being off the grid. Things with his family are kind of crazy. She asks if everything is okay, and he says, it’s headed in that direction. He hopes she wasn’t too bored, and she says, not at all. Valentin looks at them, and Nina joins him. She says, aren’t they adorable? and he says, they’re an attractive couple. She says, they’re perfect for each other. Just like them.

Jax goes back into Drew’s office, and asks what he missed. Curtis says he was sharing his security analysis, and pitching some changes that are easy to implement. Drew says the unknown factor is Jax.

Julian tells Kim that Drew didn’t say anything. He didn’t have to. Julian put it together; that’s why he’s there. She asks if he’s breaking up with her, and he says, not at all (phrase of the day). He says he’s not going to lie and say it didn’t hurt that she went to Drew, but he understands her going to Oscar’s father. If she’s going to have a child, she wants it to be a full sibling, and he can never give that to her. She thanks him for understanding, and he says he just wants her to be okay. She wonders how that’s going to happen, and he says she needs help. She asks if he means a psychiatrist or a grief counselor, and he says they can guide her. She says she doesn’t need guidance. He says he wants her to be better. She says there’s no getting better. Oscar is gone, and she’s never going to see him again.

Shiloh asks if Brad is all right. He seems stressed. Brad says he’s not, but Shiloh says, clearly something is troubling him. They can talk. Brad says he was just looking for his father-in-law, but he’s not there. Shiloh says, the offer stands, and hopes Brad comes back to DOD when they’re in a new location. Brad tells Shiloh to stay the hell away from him, and jets.

Willow says Chase probably has to take her back to her cell. She knows he thinks she should cooperate, but she’s not changing her mind. Chase says he’s the one changing his mind. He never doubted Shiloh is a dangerous criminal. Now they have a witness. They’ll reopen the investigation into her father’s death, and prove Shiloh killed him. He tells her, stay stubborn. Don’t cooperate. It will buy them time to get a statement. It might be enough, but they’ll keep learning the truth.

Shiloh sits at Charlie’s bar. He flashes back to Brad telling him, the birth mother insisted the adoption be closed. She said the birth father was never in the picture. She picked him and Lucas as parents, but now she wants to change the terms. She lives in Port Charles, and keeps finding ways to insert herself in their lives. Shiloh smirks.

Sonny asks if Carly is okay. She doesn’t know. It’s a lot. The worst case, their child will have a difficult life. Sonny says any baby they have will have their love, no matter what, and that’s all that matters. He hugs her.

On Monday, Maxie says this is terrible, Chase talks to Mac about Willow, and Shiloh says he knows who his son is.

🍹 In case you’re still interested, Southern Charm New Orleans is back on Sunday nights at 9 pm. While the original Southern Charm is one of my favorites, I just never got drawn in by its sister show. Sadly, the couple with the little dogs divorced, and they were the only ones I was marginally interested in. I also liked that girl who was on the periphery and liked to stir the pot. I don’t remember her name, but she seems to be gone now anyway. It’s always been one of those shows where, if there’s nothing else on, it’s better than sitcom reruns.

🍗 On the other hand, MasterChef is as good as ever. I finally got a chance to see an episode from the current season, where the cooks were barbecuing for 100 guests, including some former finalists. They were divided into two teams, and the winners (blue) also made the biggest blunder, with team member Subah forgetting to turn on the grill. That’s kind of important. There were still eighteen contestants, so I didn’t even bother taking names, but I did note the captain of the red team, Sarah, could have been the sister of Teddi from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Not only do they look similar, it was eerie to watch Sarah having the same speech inflections, mannerisms, and taking of responsibility – aka owning it. It was a bit of a cliffhanger, since the elimination challenge won’t be shown until the next episode. It also gave me a couple of MasterQuotes:

I need a whiskey or cold beer really bad right now. – Name unknown, but a thought probably shared by everyone.

We should never have sent out raw food, like, period. – Noah, after his team lost.

🌎 NeNe Vs the World…

NeNe used to be fun. Even her ongoing feud with Kim Zolciak was fun. Who can forget, close your legs to married men? But it seems like now she has an ongoing feud with everyone. I stopped watching RHOA a while ago because the whole show became all about shade, and NeNe’s behavior has gotten worse as the years have gone on. I caught some of the last reunion, and she didn’t have a kind word for anyone. I feel badly about Greg’s illness, and realize it’s been a difficult road, but she’s just using it for one more excuse to act any way she pleases. She needs to retire her crown. She was dethroned by her own ego long ago.



😵 A Mess and Stressed…

Well, that’s what happens when you ship in a twenty-year-old Jamaican playboy.



🙈 My Favorite Awful Couple…

And this is what happens when you move in with a guy, his mother, and their cats.


💪 By George, I Think She Really Loves Him…

Or maybe he’s letting her babysit the weed. Either way, it looks like Anfisa is only stepping out on George with some free weights.



💫 Maybe He Just Lives In Another World…

This doesn’t sound like they’re remaining friends.


🗽 Breaking Down Bethenny’s Breakdown…

She just said what we were all thinking.


🏢 While Juicy Joe Languishes…

Teresa gets busy.


💔 At Least It Keeps Her On the Show…

Apparently, Matt isn’t such an every girl’s dream after all.



🌠 Lance Bass To the Rescue…

So Jax and Brittany are really going to do this thing?



👠 The Queen Has Spoken…

And I don’t mean Ariana.


📡 Quotes of the Week

Remember if people talk behind your back, it only means you are two steps ahead.Fannie Flagg

I have decided to stick to love… Hate is too great a burden to bear. – Martin Luther King Jr.

What we need is to use what we have. – Susan Sontag

Never be limited by other people’s imaginations. – Dr. Mae Jemison

The difference between a dream and a goal is a timeline and accountability.Dr. Phil

Sometimes it’s better to be alone than be in bad company. – dude on Mexican Dynasties

A friend is what the heart needs all the time.Henry Van Dyke

What does it mean to regret, when you have no choice? – Laura Brown (Julianne Moore), The Hours

Fake is as old as the Eden tree.Orson Welles

You cannot find peace by avoiding life. – Virginia Wolfe (Nicole Kidman), The Hours – In other words, get your face out of your phone.

🚴 Go Out and Slay It…

Whether you’re a warrior or not.








July 27, 2018 – Franco Helps Jason, Charm Reflections, 90 Note, LA Wine, HexaQuotes & Incoming Weekend


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Jason steps into the elevator with Franco. Franco says he’ll take the next one, but Jason says no he won’t. He stops the elevator, and wants Franco to tell him about his job at Ferncliff.

Mary Pat tells Carly that she’s had a lot of difficulties with her; she’s the most challenging kind of patient, refusing to accept she’s there. Dr. Lazarus has done wonders for others like her. She leads Carly into a room with ECT equipment. Carly freaks, and Dr. Lazarus says the machines appear intimidating, but they’ll change everything.

Chase and Sonny use Jordan’s office to watch the video streaming from Michael’s car. Jordan asks if Sonny is comfortable, and he says he’ll be more comfortable when Nelle is behind bars. Chase thanks Jordan for the leap of faith, and tells Sonny everything is under control. Sonny asks what if Nelle reaches out to someone else, but Chase tells him to trust Michael. Nelle truly believes the car is rigged to crash. As soon as Michael gets her confession, it’s over.

Nelle tells Michael that she didn’t want to be a high-maintenance pregnant woman, and she thinks she hasn’t been for the most part. She’s kept cool, except for the health scares, which were out of her control. They were caused by the earthquake and Carly. She tells him to slow down; she’s not going into labor, just seeing a lactation specialist. She appreciates him going the extra mile. He asks if she hasn’t figured out that he’d do anything for her.

Maxie visits Nina in the interrogation room. She called in some favors. Nina says Maxie doesn’t need to wait with her, but Maxie says they need to talk. She wants to know how Nina let Obrecht rope her into kidnapping Peter.

Finn sits with Peter. Peter says, yes, he’s alive. Finn says good thing he never smoked. His lungs look good. There’s no permanent damage, and he doesn’t need the mask to sleep. He’s a lucky man. Peter says, thanks to him. Finn ran into a burning stable to rescue him. Anyone else would have let him die. Finn says, except for his mother.

Obrecht is sitting, cuffed and wearing orange, at the station. Robert arrives, and says, well, well, well. Dr. Obrecht, I presume. Cuffed and ready for prison. What a wonderful sight.

Jason doesn’t want trouble. He just wants Franco to tell him what he needs to know. He asks if Franco has an ID, and Franco says, of course. He knows it must be about Carly. He thinks they need to adjust her meds. She seemed like she was hallucinating. Jason asks where his ID is, and Franco says, in his pocket. He doesn’t think Jason can pass for him, but Jason says Franco is going to get him in.

Carly says she doesn’t want treatment, but she’s too weak to resist. Mary Pat gives the doctor the paperwork, saying, signed, sealed, and delivered. Dr. Lazarus tells the orderlies to put her on the table. Carly protests, and Mary Pat asks if she should stick around, but Dr. Lazarus says he’ll take it from there. Carly says she doesn’t want to do this. Mary Pat leaves, and smiles in the hallway.

Jordan sees Robert, and says she heard he was on his way. He says he got the first flight when he heard Peter was in custody. Obrecht too. He tells Jordan, good work. She says Obrecht is due for immediate transfer, but Peter is still recovering at the hospital. He asks if he can have a few words with his old friend. Jordan says, with all her insane behavior, she’s in deep grief over the death of her child. He says he’ll go easy on her, and Jordan says it’s up to him. He site with Obrecht, who tells him, the word of the day is schadenfreude; enjoy it. He says she left him in a coma for twelve months, and nearly had him convinced his daughter was dead. She says, karma is cruel justice. She understands his pain, but his child is alive; hers is dead. Robert says he used to think of ways to get even, but now, he doesn’t even want to kill her. She’s going to pay the ultimate price, and spend the rest of her life in prison.

Nina says she’s sure Maxie must have ideas. Maxie says she’s the daughter of the former police commissioner, and was the wife of a detective. Nina says the current commissioner is going to ask her questions, and the less Maxie knows, the better. Maxie understands, but before she goes, she wants to thank Nina for saving Peter.

Peter wonders why Finn would risk his life. Because of his feelings for Peter’s mother? Why is he so interested in the case? Smoke inhalation isn’t exactly an infectious disease. Finn says he realizes Peter doesn’t have warm and fuzzy feelings for Anna. Peter says she abandoned him, and never looked back. Finn says that’s not exactly true. She thought he went to a loving family. Valentin is the one who gave him to Faison. He’s entitled to his righteous anger, but Finn thinks he knows deep down that she did the right thing, and made a loving sacrifice. Peter knows nothing of the kind; a sacrifice involves love. Finn says he knows Peter has hated her his whole life, and thinks he doesn’t know how to stop. Peter says most people think of holidays when they hear the word family. He thinks of pain, anger, and betrayal, but Finn wouldn’t know about that, would he?

Nelle says they just passed the street they were supposed to turn on. Michael says he’s not going to the hospital. He thinks they should go to Sawyer first, then the hospital. Nelle remembers Chase telling her that after fifteen miles, the controls will fail. She suggests Michael let her out, and she’ll call a car. He tells her that she’s being ridiculous. There’s no way he’s going to do that. At the station, Sonny sees the look on her face, and says she knows the car is rigged, and wants to put his son in the ground. Chase says that’s not going to happen. Thanks to Michael, they’ll be putting her away for good. Sonny doesn’t know what he was thinking. He told Carly to let it go, and she knew it wasn’t good. Now a psycho is planning to murder his son. Chase says there’s no shame in getting played by Nelle. He thought there was some good in her. She was so bitter because of the hand life dealt her, that she turned into a master manipulator. She could give a master class in deception. No one sees it until it’s too late. Sonny says, only Carly.

Nina says Maxie is giving her too much credit. Maxie says she kept Obrecht from killing Peter, and she’s willing to bet Nina kept him alive the whole time. Nina says she’s not a saint in any of this. She asks if Maxie still cares about Peter. Maxie says, not at all, but that doesn’t mean she wants him dead. Nathan was Nina’s brother, and in a weird way, Peter is too. He’s James’s uncle. She’d never let him have s role in James’s life, but he’s better off not finding out his grandmother killed his uncle. In the first two months of his life, there’s been enough death. She wants to forget the anger and revenge, and focus on living. Nina thinks James is lucky to have such an incredible, wise mom. Whatever happened, Maxie doesn’t approve, but she doesn’t want Nina going down for this. Nina thinks she’ll be okay. Peter didn’t name her as an accomplice.

Peter tells Finn it looks like he struck a nerve, and asks if he has a deep, dark skeleton in his family closet. Finn says every family has a skeleton. Peter can lie in bed feeling sorry for himself or realize he has a second chance. He’s free from Faison, and his mother wants to connect. He tells Peter to get over himself and be part of life. Peter asks where his mother is. His father is dead; where is she? Maybe she only wants to connect when it’s convenient. She gives out love on her terms, with conditions and caveats. Finn says Peter knows nothing about her. Maybe he should use his recovery time to give it more thought. Robert comes in, and says he doesn’t think Peter will be hanging around. On behalf of the Bureau, he’s there to take Peter into custody.

Carly doesn’t want to do this. The doctor says she’s becoming agitated, and asks when her last dose was. He thinks it’s close enough, and tells her to try and relax. Carly wants her lawyer, Sonny, anything but the drugs. Dr. Lazarus gives her a shot.

Franco and Jason are at Ferncliff. Franco says he got Jason in there; Jason can take it from here. Jason says he’s going to need him. Franco says, for what? and tells him not to say a backup. He’s a hostage in this situation. Jason tells him, Elizabeth said he changed. Prove it. Franco asks what Jason wants him to do, and Jason says for now, stay there. Jason moves on down the hall, and Franco asks himself, why, why, why did he get on that elevator? Jason pulls a gun on Mary Pat and the orderly she’s with. Where’s Rupert? Did he quit? Jason asks where Carly is, and Mary Pat says, this is a crime, and tells him that he’s committing a felony. She lets him know what room Carly is in, and Jason opens the closest door, locking Mary Pat and the orderly in. Franco says, it’s going well; he’ll wait in the car. Jason says they’re not finished yet.

Chase apologizes to Sonny for not doing more when Nelle was gaslighting Carly. He thought she had a psychological problem because of the death of her son. Now she’s in an institution that she doesn’t need to be in. He takes his share of the responsibility, and will tell the judge. Hopefully, Carly will be released. Sonny says Nelle played his whole family. He and Michael pegged her as an opportunist, but Carly knew she was a killer. He didn’t know what she was capable of. Chase says now they do, and they’re ahead of the game. Sonny says it’s not a game to him. Not when his wife and son’s lives are on the line.

Michael has driven eight miles. Nelle says she doesn’t need the lollipops, but he says, yes, she does. She suggests they go to the hospital first; the specialist will be off duty soon. He says she’s married to a member of the board. The hospital will be open in thirty minutes; the store might not be. Once they get on the highway, he’ll step on the gas. She tells him to pull over. If they don’t pull over, they’ll crash.

Finn asks if Robert has official documents, and Robert hands him some papers. He says with the exception of fraud and breaking out of jail, Peter’s crimes fall under the jurisdiction of the Bureau. He says the reunion is postponed, and Finn says Anna doesn’t know. Robert tells him to release the prisoner into his custody, but Finn says Peter isn’t a prisoner to him. He’s a patient, and Finn can’t sign a release at this time.

Maxie guesses since Nina saved Peter’s life, he’s returning the favor. Nina wonders if it has something to do with getting back into Maxie’s good graces. Jordan comes in, and asks who authorized Maxie’s visit? Maxie says she let herself in; Nina is her sister-in-law. Jordan says they still have protocol. Maxie leaves, and sees Obrecht.

Jason wants Franco to keep watch for ten minutes. Franco says Mary Pat is the supervising nurse, and she’ll be missed. Jason says, for the next ten minutes, if anyone comes by, send them in the other direction. Franco suggests he just knock them over the head, and throw them in another room. Jason says, if he wants. Franco says Jason doesn’t care whose life he ruins, as long as he saves Carly. It’s the first time he likes his life, and can’t afford to be a convict. Jason leaves, and Franco checks the time on his phone.

Dr. Lazarus says it’s a precaution. Any degree of involuntary movement will disrupt the treatment. It’s for her own protection. Carly is prepped, and they put one of those rubber things in her mouth.

Jordan apologizes to Nina for taking so long; it’s been busy. She sees Nina doesn’t have a lawyer. Nina says she hasn’t called one. Jordan says, last night, she was adamant about not saying a word, not she’s ready to talk about what happened in the cabin? Nina says, nope. She decided to skip hiring a lawyer, and just sit there silently. Unless Jordan is pressing charges. She heard Peter’s statement, and she’s not contradicting it. Jordan says a quarantine was staged on Spoon Island. It’s not looking good for her. Nina says holding her is a waste of time. Jordan has nothing on her, and they both know it. She’ll sit there and wait for the clock to run out. Nina asks if Jordan and Curtis have set a date.

Maxie approaches Obrecht. Obrecht tells Maxie that she’s being transferred to Pentonville, where she’ll await trial. She’s considered a flight risk, and she’s a repeat offender. Obrecht is sorry she  failed Maxie. Maxie says, in what way? Obrecht says she kidnapped Peter for her and James. She wanted to get justice for Nathan, and some measure of closure. Maxie says, don’t say it; don’t even think it. Obrecht didn’t do this for them. Not even for Nathan. She did it for herself.

Robert says Finn might want to reconsider. This could be construed as obstruction of justice. Finn says Peter is his patient, and inhaled a near fatal amount of smoke. Does he look okay? He believes in taking extra precautions, so there are no unexpected complications. Robert asks how long these extra precautions will take. Finn says it could be a day or a few weeks. He doesn’t know. Robert says, as long as takes for Anna to get back?

Sonny takes to the screen. He says, easy. Get her on the line, and reel her in.

Michael tells Nelle that they’re not going to crash. He’s a good driver. She says she’s telling him if he doesn’t pull over, they’re going to crash. He says he’ll call the hospital when they get to the store. She grabs the steering wheel, and says, the car is rigged. Chase sabotaged it. Michael asks, why would he do that? and she says Chase wants to kill him. He tells her that her third trimester hormones are acting up. Chase wouldn’t try to kill him. She says if he doesn’t pull over, they’ll both die. The baby will die. The car is rigged because she asked him to do it.

Robert says Finn only turned up for part of reunion. Imagine what would have happened if Jason hadn’t shown up to prevent the shooting. Finn says Anna is in Berkeley, trying to make things right with Robin. Robert tells him not to bring his daughter into it. Finn says he’s not signing the release, and to take it up with the hospital administration or the court. Robert says, don’t think he won’t. He tells Peter, see you around, Henrik, and slams out.

Maxie knows what’s going on in Obrecht’s head. She wanted vengeance. She wanted Peter to feel the same pain. Obrecht admits she does. Maxie says she and Nina needed closure. Now they’ve got it. Obrecht says she’s going to prison, and Maxie says, after nearly torturing Peter to death. Did it fix any of this? Does she at least feel better? Maxie knows how much she loved Nathan, and it’s not what he would have wanted. All she accomplished was taking herself away from them. Her son lost his grandmother, and possibly his Aunt Nina, if she gets caught up in it, and he needs them both.

Jordan likes Nina, and appreciates her friendship with Curtis, but it’s not a game. She needs to start to take it seriously. Nina asks if Jordan is letting her go, and Jordan says, for now. The investigation is still going on. If Nina wants her advice, hire a lawyer.

Jordan sees that Obrecht’s ride has arrived. It might help her sentence if she cooperates. If she had an accomplice, now would be the time to say something. Obrecht says she did it as she came into the world – alone. She tells Maxie to make sure James never forgets his father, and his oma loves him very much. She hugs Maxie, who tells her to take care. Obrecht cries. I almost cry. She’s taken away.

Watching the screen, Chase says he almost got her. Sonny says, come on, son, like they’re watching a game. Michael tells Nelle that she’s not making sense. She says she didn’t want it to go this far, but he didn’t leave her much choice. Michael says, she hired Chase to kill him? She says he needs to pull over, but he speeds up. She says he didn’t marry her for love. He wanted to control her and get the baby. She knows about the will, and heard his conversation with Jason. Michael says, so she devised a plan to kill him over a possible custody dispute? She says he acted like she was disposable. She’s not letting it happen again. He asks if she killed Zack, and she says she had to; he was weak. If she’d waited, his family would have come between them, and they wouldn’t have gotten married. She didn’t want him dead, but didn’t have a choice. Michael says he makes his own choices too. Nelle screams for him to pull over. Chase says they finally got her.

Jordan tells Nina that she’s lucky her aunt backed up her story, but she’s still a person of interest. She says, and no, they haven’t set a date yet. She leaves, and Maxie asks if Nina is okay. Nina says she’s spent so much time being consumed by guilt, suspicion, and revenge. For first time since Nathan died, she doesn’t know what’s next. That’s the hard part; getting on with the rest of their lives. Maxie takes her hand.

Peter says Finn must have it bad for his mother. Finn would like to think he’s do this for anyone who was separated from their child. She made a tough decision, and suffered the consequences. He does care about her. Finn’s phone dings. It’s a text from Anna thanking him for looking after Peter, and saying things have gotten complicated. Come to Berkeley. Finn says be bought Peter extra time. Use it wisely. He leaves, and Peter scowls. He looks kind of like Tim Allen in The Santa Clause.

Outside, Finn texts back that he’s on his way.

Robert calls Robin, and demands she put her mother on the phone. She says she hasn’t seen her mother, and Robert says she’s supposed to be with her.

Sonny says they’ve got the confession on tape. Shut it down. Chase says Michael wants her to admit Carly didn’t push her. Chase thinks he can do it.

Michael says Nelle lied to his face about Zack, and everything else. Now she’s trying to kill him? She took everything from him and his family. HIs mom was right. Nelle was the one who made her believe that his brother was still alive. Nelle wanted her out of the way. Nelle says she’ll tell him everything; just pull over. First, Michael wants to know if Carly pushed her. Nelle won’t say until he pulls over, but he says, say it. Did she push Nelle? Nelle looks out the front window, and yells, look out! They crash. At the station, the screen goes black.

Franco asks himself what he’s doing. He’s marrying the most incredible woman on the planet, and they’ll live happily ever after. Assuming he’s not awaiting trial for helping to break out a mental patient. He’s trying to do the noble thing. The ruthless killer with the Botticelli eyes is a good friend. Not to him. Jason has plenty of reason not to like him, but his broad shoulders should be strong enough to handle a brain tumor. Franco wasn’t responsible, and he’s trying to prove he’s changed. He’s putting his life on the line for the last time. He looks at his phone and says, nine minutes.

The final preparations are made for Carly’s treatment. Dr. Lazarus says, it all seems alarming, but she’s receiving a gift. Anger and violence will be a thing of the past. Her whole perspective will change. Jason busts in with a gun, saying, nobody move.

On Monday, Jordan wants to know what’s going on, Franco tries to escape, and Jason tells Dr. Lazarus to shut the machine off right now.

🍹 And how about those Southern Charmers? Kathryn Dennis has definitely won the reality queen crown. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone do such a 180, and claim their piece of the world the way she has. It also made me love Patricia Altschul again. Both are true ladies, and also big enough girls to apologize. I’ve loved the show from the beginning, but this was the best season yet. Kathryn was never a true villain, but omg, Ashley. And Thomas. Kathryn also gave one of the best quotes – although I’ll have to paraphrase – when she told Ashley that she was really out of touch with the fact she’s a complete a-hole. I just had to repeat it again. It was a masterpiece reality moment. I don’t often follow C-list celebrities on Twitter, but when I do, they’re usually from Southern Charm.

🔀 BTW, I’ve  been confusing my spin-off Charms. New Orleans is the one where the couple with the little dogs broke up. They were my main reason for sort of watching. Savannah lost Ashley, who was ditto. I was fascinated by how in denial she was. She insisted she was just one of the guys, and took off her clothes at every opportunity, proving to everyone that she wasn’t. Needless to say, the girlfriends of the guys she was one of, were not too happy. The villain of the piece, I wonder if she saw herself for the girl code breaker she was, and chose to opt out for that reason. I’m sticking with the originals, but keeping the other two in my periphery.

💍 90 Day Fiancé has moved into Tell All Territory, where lots of boxing gloves have been put on. On What Now? Danielle continues to stalk Mohamad, but also won’t leave online not-really-dating alone, and it looks like she might have been catfished. Here, she talks about not being so trusting after Mohamad, which apparently didn’t work out.


💋 Little Women LA wrapped things up for the season. I barely watched it, but did catch the episode where a very white Tara thought it would be a brilliant idea to come out with a wine called Black Girl Moscato. It wasn’t. She thought sisters would be down with that, but she did not make the Moscato happen. The entire rainbow said no, just no. These girls could give Lisa Rinna a run for her money the way they attach their names to products.

📋 Quotes of the Week

Nothing says middle-aged white man more than misunderstanding slang. – Dr. Terry Dubrow, Botched

Tell me whom you love and I will tell you who you are.Houssaye

The mystery of life is not solved by success, which is an end in itself, but in failure, in perpetual struggle, in becoming.Patrick White

The only thing I love more than hoarders are people too fat to fit through doors. – Max (Kat Dennings), 2 Broke Girls (Me too! Max is my spirit animal.)

The problem with books is that they end.Caroline Kepnes, You

A man can’t improve their past. – a commentator on the firing of James Gunn

🎩 Bon Weekend…

😊 The good…


😒 The bad…

Lovely Working On A Weekend Quotes i hate working weekends work pinterest night shift

😲 And the wtf?



May 10, 2018 – Nelle Opens the Mystery Gift, Naomie Apologizes, Tidbits & Friday


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Lucy walks into the locker room at the PCPD. Dante stops her, and she says she’d hoped to run into him. He asks how she got back there, and she says she must have taken wrong turn. He says he’ll walk her out, but she won’t budge. She tells him that every year his mom helps with the Nurses’ Ball while he’s escaped performing; why? Lucy hears someone singing in the shower, and says that’s what she’s talking about. Chase comes out in a towel, and she tells him that he’s hired.

Monica asks if Nelle is ready; the guests are arriving soon. Nelle says it seems like she just came to town alone, now she’s been embraced by the town’s most beloved family, and is really a having shower where everyone is coming to support her or show respect. Monica says she’s come a long way. The doorbell rings, and Monica says it’s showtime. Carly comes in, and asks if the macaroons showed up. Nelle says everything came as promised. Carly says she always keeps her promises. The balloons are really cool – gigantic things with tassels hanging from them. You could ride off somewhere on these.

Alexis is at the MetroCourt, and Finn asks to join her. He owes her apology. He was sharp with her, and she was just trying to bring him and Chase closer. She admits to overstepping, and he says she means well. Maybe some broken families can be fixed, but not his. It’s broken and can’t be repaired.

Mike asks where Carly is, and Sonny tells him she’s at the baby shower for Nelle. He says his caregiver keeps saying things like, “how are we today?” so he came down to find his pint-sized living doll. They have a floor puzzle going on. Sonny explains she’s not there this week; she’s with Ava. Mike remembers she has joint custody because he screwed up.

Nelle tells Carly it’s nice of her to help out today, and Carly says today is all about family. Ava arrives with Avery. Carly tells Avery today is going to be a great day, and Nelle looks at her like, ugh. Monica says it’s a wonderful surprise, but doesn’t recall seeing her on the guest list. Nelle says she included Ava. How could she forget the person who supported her when everyone else turned their backs? She takes Ava to the gift table, and Ava says, clearly, she’s not doing well so far. Nelle tells her to just do her part, and Griff will never know she took a picture of the DNA test.

Josslyn is glad Nelle included her, and Nelle says they share a bond like no other. She’s glad Bobbie is letting bygones be bygones, and Bobbie says she’s about to be a grandma as well. She asks Carly if she’s okay. She shouldn’t be surprised that Nelle invited Ava, but Carly says at least she gets to see Avery. Bobbie tells her, never let them see you sweat. Carly tells her about the trip to Puerto Rico that she and Sonny planned. She doesn’t understand why Monica can’t see what Nelle is up to, and Carly says she has reinforcements at her side. Nelle hears her, and wonders why she thinks it’s some kind of contest. Carly suggests they set their differences aside and focus on what’s important – the baby.

Alexis tells Finn about her brothers; one was a bully, and the other her protector, who went crazy and died. He says there’s one glaring omission; Valentin. She says no one had contact with him. He says she does now, but imagine if, against her wishes, he attempted to reconcile them. She says he can’t compare his father to hers; Mikkos was diabolical. His family is dysfunctional; hers are the Cassadines. She says they’re not at a meeting right now. He can talk to her.

Lucy introduces herself holds out hand, but Chase holds on to his towel. Dante introduces him, and Lucy says she’s not going until she gets what she wants. It would be a shame to hide his beautiful… voice inside a stinky locker room. She suggests he share it with the world and sing at the Nurses’ Ball.

Mike tells Sonny that if he hadn’t taken off with Avery, and gotten confused and scared, she’d be where she belonged. Sonny says it was an accident, and no one is pointing fingers. They just have to figure out how to make the custody agreement work for Avery. That’s the most important thing. Mike gets up, saying the house is too quiet. His whole life is vanishing, but one laugh from Avery makes it okay. Sonny says he misses her too.

Carly takes Josslyn and Avery to the kitchen for macaroons. Brad arrives, and Bobbie wonders what’s going on. Carly asks where his other half is. Brad says Lucas is working, so he’s there to represent. He and Lucas will be parents soon, and he’ll be coming over for playdates. Josslyn says they can have grown-up dates too, and not to forget the certificate she gave them. He says it’s in a place of honor on the fridge. Avery comes out with Carly. Ava takes Avery’s free hand, so she’s between them. Josslyn tells Ava that Avery won’t get lost on the way to living room. Ava says it’s her week with mommy. Olivia asks if she’d like to go to the playroom with Leo, and Monica moves everyone to the living room.

Finn tells Alexis when he was a kid, his dad was his hero. He was a professor at a prestigious university, but when he came home, he always had time for Finn. When his mom got sick, he stayed by her side. Alexis asks if that’s why he wanted to become a doctor. He remembers his father telling him that his mom had an incurable disease. He felt angry and helpless. He was young and naïve, but told himself that he’d wipe out incurable diseases, and make a difference. Alexis says he did, but he says, not soon enough. She asks what happened after that, and he tells her his dad remarried right after she died.

Chase says he needs to get dressed, and Lucy promises not to peek. She’s not taking no for an answer. It would she a shame not to share his amazing voice at the Nurses’ Ball. He’s never heard of it, so Lucy explains that it’s a legendary tradition, a magical night where they all come together and create awareness for HIV/AIDS. Chase says he’d be glad to give a donation, but Lucy says they need his talent. He says they’re cops not entertainers. Dante tells him that they all do it; it’s like a brotherhood thing. If he wants to fit in with the community, the best way is the Nurses’ Ball.

Monica welcomes everyone, and thanks them for coming. She says the house has seen share of good and bad times. It’s been shaken to its foundation, but like Port Charles, it’s still standing. The Quartermaines seem to be dwindling, but now new family members are coming into the fold. She’s going to be a great-grandmother. She makes a toast the baby and the future generations to come. Wow.  I’ve been to quite a few showers, and not once has someone started it off like that. Nelle toasts to Brad and Lucas, who are bringing a new edition to the family too. Carly and Ava give the evil eye to each other.

Max makes small talk with Mike. Sonny tells Mike he has to stay on schedule with the nurse, which Mike tells Max is code for butt out. He goes upstairs, and Sonny asks Max if there’s any word on Croton; how Mike knew or if anyone else knows. Max says nothing yet. Maybe Mike heard second hand, or followed him. Sonny says one of Skully’s guys could have talked, but how would Mike know to ask? Mike was barely in his life then.

Olivia brings out macaroons, and says it’s time to play a game. Nelle says, first, she has a gift of her own to give. She presents Carly with the most precious thing she possesses.  Carly makes a sick face. Bobbie tells Nelle it’s her day, and she hasn’t opened her gifts yet. Nelle says it would mean the world to her if Carly opens her gift first. She insists. Carly says it is her day. Nelle tells her after the other set was damaged, she redrafted the guardian papers. She meant what she said. She wants Carly and Sonny to be the baby’s guardians; they’re the best choice. She just wants them accepted in the spirit they’re being given. She wants the baby to have a loving family. Carly is just sitting there, and Josslyn says it’s a beautiful, loving gesture. Can’t she accept it in the same spirit? Nelle says Carly was her first friend in Port Charles. Bobbie says, before she stabbed her in the back, and Olivia says, it’s not a reality show. Cue the wishing well.

Alexis tells Finn his father isn’t the first widower to seek comfort. She asks if they’re still married, and Finn thinks so. She asks if they’re happy, and he asks if he’s being cross-examined. She says it’s an occupational hazard. Finn says she did nothing wrong. She tells him from what she’s hearing, he seems to be taking out his resentment of his father on Chase. It’s been years, and she wonders why he can’t cut his brother some slack.

Chase says if Dante vouches for it, he’s in, and Lucy says he won’t regret it. She tells him to head over to the MetroCourt, and schedule his rehearsal and get his costumes going. Standing behind Chase, Dante looks like he’s barely keeping it together. Lucy says, since he’s new in town, she’s sure he needs someplace to live, and gives him her card. Dante can’t contain his laughter at this point.

Max tells Sonny that he has good news. The field is still empty. Sonny says Mike definitely knows something. Maybe doesn’t matter how, but what does. He can’t keep secret; he has no edit button. Max says he has two options. Either leave it alone, and hope they don’t believe him; or dig up the problem and move it, which could bring renewed interest. Sonny asks if Max is telling him he’s screwed either way.

Olivia tells everyone to put in a gift and make a wish. Josslyn puts in Good Night, Moon, and says she wishes to be not just the baby’s aunt, but their best friend. Ava also has Good Night, Moon, because it’s Avery’s favorite. She wishes the baby brings peace, love, and a very long maternity leave. Brad tells her that he wouldn’t mind second book for his baby, and gives her a membership to the children’s museum. He hopes the baby grows up in a world where they never stop making wishes. Bobbie puts in a map to grandma’s house, so they’ll always find their way to her. Monica says it’s a Quartermaine tradition to give a bond, and wishes it reaches maturity as the baby comes of age. Carly says Nelle is right; Nelle gave her the most precious gift to give or receive, and she accepts in the spirit it was given. She’s putting it in the well until she and Sonny can sign it. She wishes it will never become necessary, but if fate intervenes, the baby will be in the best of hands. Nelle can count on it. Geez, that was a cheap gift. She could have at least thrown in some macaroons and a balloon.

Finn tells Alexis that he’s not a fan of reminiscing. She says whatever they talk about remains between them. They’ve both experienced rock backgrounds, and she won’t judge. He appreciates it, but for the preservation of their friendship, they should make a pact that they won’t try to fix each other’s dysfunctional families. Alexis says it’s a deal.

Dante tells Chase, the coast is clear. Chase says Lucy is intense. He looked up the Nurses’ Ball, and it is quite a tradition. He knows they were thrown together when Dante’s partner passed away. He can’t imagine how hard that was, and didn’t expect to be accepted right away. He still feels like a stranger, but making a fool of himself for a worthy cause means a lot. He asks if Dante read the report on the warehouse break-in. He thinks forensics should have been copied, since they might see something Dante missed. Dante tells him to enjoy the Ball.

Sonny thanks Max for following up, and tells him to thank Milo. Max says they have his back. He thinks maybe Sonny should go with his first instinct; what happens in Croton stays in Croton – six feet under. Sonny says it might not be that easy. Mike comes down. Sonny asks how long he’s been there, and Mike says, long enough.

Olivia brings out a Diaper Genie, and tells Nelle that she’ll thank her later. Josslyn says it’s a lucky baby, and Nelle says she got that right. She still has one she didn’t open from Ava. Nelle gushes over the wrapping, and asks what it is. Ava says, open it and they’ll all find out. Nelle hates to open the last gift on what’s been the best day of her life. She thanks them for their generosity, and hopes to look back on the day with pride and joy. She starts to open it, and Ava says, wait.

Finn asks if Alexis would like to come over, and she asks if he’s Inviting her to see his etchings. He says he doesn’t have etchings, but has something else he can show her. She has a court case, and says, another time. She says his charming per makes her want to know his past, and he says he’ll dial down his unlimited charm. Finn sees Chase walk in, and says, here we go again.

Sonny tells Mike they were discussing business, and asks what he heard. Mike tells him, what he said about Croton. Sonny asks what he knows; it’s the second time he’s mentioned it. Mike says maybe he’s confused and his mind is playing tricks, but this he knows; they’re building something in Croton. Sonny looks puzzled.

Carly asks if something is wrong. Ava says Nelle was sad about opening the last gift, so she should save it to open on a day she’s not feeling so great; or she and Michael can open it together. Nelle says she can’t wait to see it. I can’t either. It’s a cute penguin mobile. Nelle raves about it, and says, it’s to die for. Josslyn looks at Carly, and asks what’s wrong. Carly says, Morgan loved penguins, and Ava knew that, didn’t she?

Alexis tells Finn that she didn’t mastermind this. She didn’t know Chase was going to come waltzing in there. Chase says he’s not waltzing; he’s singing. He stopped in for coffee before rehearsal for the Nurses’ Ball. Finn says he didn’t know Chase sang. Chase says there’s a lot he doesn’t know about him, but that’s what he wants, right? Chase leaves, and Finn apologizes to Alexis about thinking she set him up. She says maybe that’s not the only thing he’s wrong about.

Lucy comes back to the locker room. She tells Dante she was just in time to change the program. Dante can’t believe he managed to get Chase to sing; telling him the whole department was involved, was just an act. Lucy says she already told the printer, but Dante says it was just a prank. The only one who will be performing is Chase. Lucy says it’s not very sporting of him. She’s not too crazy about him co-opting the Nurses’ Ball for a practical joke. Although Chase does have lovely voice and he’s easy on the eyes. She doesn’t want to sound shallow, but looks do mater. Dante says, don’t tell him. it will spoil the fun.

Sonny asks Mike what he thinks happened. Did he see something? Did someone tell him a story? Mike says he knows what he knows. Max comes back, and tells Sonny that new construction is set to begin in the field.

Carly says this was deliberate to remind her of Morgan. Ava says it’s a shower gift. Carly says she used him when he was alive, and she’s still using him to hurt her. Ava says he’s not the only child in the history of the world who likes penguins. Carly says he’s only one she tampered with. She grabs mobile and throws it against the wall, saying, screw you, Ava. Ava looks at Nelle. Everyone is stunned.

Tomorrow, Carly calls Nelle a snake, Valentin asks Anna if she’s avoiding him, and Nina asks Curtis if it’s what she thinks it is.

Southern Charm

Cameran calls Jason from the car, saying she has a stubborn cervix. They might induce her next week. In her interview, she says he’s desensitized since that’s his life every day – women having babies. She tells him not to do that “we” stuff, since she’s the only one who will be in labor.

Kathryn calls Marshall, the owner of Gwynn’s (an upscale store), wondering if there’s a position available. She thinks it would be a great place for her to start, as they taught her a lot about her personal style. He says they don’t have a lot of turnover, but asks to talk to her on Saturday morning.

Naomie goes to her father’s restaurant, Nico, and gives orders in French about how to move the tables. He had several restaurants in France, and is opening one in Charleston. They’re having a pre-opening tasting dinner. She’s pretty aggressive for a French girl.

Craig meets Austen for beer. Otherwise known as Austen’s research and development. Austen says Naomie is cold-blooded. Craig feels badly for Peyton, since she just moved there. We flash back to Naomie being a huge a-hole at the Halloween party. Craig is laughing because it’s not him.

Naomie tells her father about the party. She thinks Peyton is using people, and it disgusts her, but she said some not very nice things. Right. Like I think she really believes Peyton is using anybody. How so? Even if she was flirting with these guys, why is that Naomie’s business. Her father tells her life is not about aggression, but being nice. She still questions Peyton’s intentions. Peyton is trying to say it’s a misunderstanding, but she heard Peyton was flirting with Craig. Her father, who is apparently no dummy, asks if that’s really the problem, and that she has to solve it. He tells her respect is the magic word in life, and she has to apologize.

Craig tells Austen that Naomie doesn’t have to like Peyton, but her problem is, she doesn’t know how to apologize. As if on cue, Naomie calls Austen, and tells him about the pre-opening. He says he’d love to come, and asks if her ex is invited. She says yes, and it’s cool if he brings Peyton. She feels bad about making her cry (as well she should). She’s not convinced she’s wrong, but owes her an apology. She asks for Peyton’s number, and says she wants to invite her. I’d be afraid she’d stalk Peyton.

Austen calls his sister Katie. He’s driving to the brewery, since his parents pushed him off the ledge to make something happen. He’s thinking of producing a beer of his own. He doesn’t have his recipe yet, but knows what he likes, and he and Thomas (not Ravenel) are putting their heads together.

He arrives at the Thomas Creek Brewery. Thomas shows him around. In his interview, Austen explains that with contract brewing, you find a brewery that already has equipment, so you don’t have to spend money on that. Kind of like subcontracting. Austen likes the grapefruit idea. Thomas thinks it works, but the passionfruit can come across medicinal. Austen wants to make a good beer with citrus for the beach and boat, that’s still tap ready. He asks what the next steps are, and Thomas says a test batch is about four hundred bucks. Austen says it would be kick-ass.

Shep picks up Cameran for lunch. She wants to do a lap down Labor Lane. Shep has no clue where that is, and she explains that back in the day, women would ride down Chalmers Street, hoping the jarring from the cobblestones induced labor. Shep says he thought they were having lunch. He doesn’t want to be there when her water breaks. They go down the cobblestoned street, and Shep has Cameran laughing so hard, she says she wants to pee. He tells her they’re not doing a second lap.

They go to the restaurant, and Shep asks how it will work if Jason is at work when the baby comes. She says she’ll need a ride to the hospital. Shep doesn’t think he’d be good in a tragedy, and amends that to emergency. Cameran says now that she’s entering a new phase, what’s next for him? Shep says he’s doing some traveling, but she asks about goals, and evolving as a man. She thinks he’ll have to expand his horizons to meet a woman. In her interview, Cameran says she’s no psychic. We see an old clip of her predicting he’d be married in two years. She says he’s not the marrying kind; he’s the banging kind. He says he thought he’d end up with an English or Australian girl, because the men are buffoons. Cameran can’t believe he just called himself a buffoon, and thinks maybe he’s savvier than she thought.

Craig visits Patricia. She asks about the break-up with Naomie, and he says it’s good to get rid of the toxicity. He tells her about his life coach. She asks if he’s changed. He says it just been a week, but he has to start somewhere. Patricia says she talked to the people who run her company; they make high-end products covered with dogs and cats, and want him to design a specialized pillow to manufacture. Too bad they don’t make products covered with dog hair. I’d be rich. Craig tells her it’s everything he said he wanted. Not to be dramatic, but it’s a big break for an upcoming artist or designer. Some people would cut off an appendage for it. In her interview, Patricia says Craig can be a knucklehead, but an endearing one. She wants to help him. He says he’ll make a prototype of each, and asks if she wants it cheeky. She says it can just come to him.

Kathryn hasn’t interviewed for a job since college. She says she might not have the prerequisites, but has faith in herself, and thinks she can figure it out. She goes to Marshall’s office, and meets with him and his assistant, Madison. She says the store is like a second home. Marshall asks how she sees her presence in the store contributing to their culture. She tells him she’s been shopping there for so long, and knows the atmosphere. She feels that she could add to aesthetic brainstorming. In her interview, she wonders why the eff she can’t put a sentence together, He tells her sometimes it’s hectic, and they have to juggle a lot of balls. He asks how she handles stress, and she asks for some water and a moment to think. I’m surprised that she’s blanking out like this. Incorporating having to deal with the kid situation in her answer about stress, would have been perfect. Madison says Kathryn knows the goals they’re trying to achieve as a brand. Kathryn thinks she can contribute to the customer experience, and would like to get more people her age shop outside of King Street. Madison says it’s good to keep the conversation going, even if there’s no spot open right now. Marshall says if she doesn’t hear from them, to call.

Shep goes to Chelsea’s salon for a haircut. He’s getting leg surgery, but says he’s not slowing down. She says he is like a pirate, referring to his Halloween costume. She asks if he’s going to the restaurant opening. She can’t believe Naomie invited Peyton, and thinks Naomie feels bad. She asks if Shep would pick Austen or Craig for her, and he says, Craig. He tells her that Austen is having fun downtown, and is like he was two years ago. In her interview, Chelsea says Shep is making Austen seem like the bad guy, but she doesn’t see her and Shep as more than friends.

Thomas and Ashley get ready for the pre-opening. He brings her wine in the bathroom. He tells her that Kathryn is going. She says she’d texted Kathryn, but hasn’t herd back. She wanted to bring up trick-or-treating. We flash back to Kathryn telling Thomas it was too soon for that. Thomas tells Ashley if she wants to piss Kathryn off, go for it, but no response means no. In his interview, Thomas says he understands not wanting to share special moments with a woman who may or may not be in his life for a long time. Ashley wants Kathryn to know she’s not trying to take anyone’s place. Thomas jokes she’s just trying to take away the father of her children. Ashley is not amused.

Everyone trickles in to Nico. Naomie tells Cameran if she delivers there, she has to name her Nico. Cameran says Austen seems taller, but he says it’s just because she’s wider. Danni heard there was drama at the party. Thomas flirts with Kathryn. In her interview, Kathryn says he does it naturally, not to piss off Ashley. She doesn’t think he knows Ashley is there, and feels bad for her. Shep tells Austen he talked to Chelsea, and she trimmed his hair. Cameran thinks Austen and Chelsea are rekindling things. Shep tells her that he thought he and Chelsea had a moment at the salon. Cameran says he blew his shot, and he asks why. We flash back to Cameran telling him that he was too aggressive with Chelsea. Austen talks to Chelsea on the patio. She tells him that Shep barely let her cut his hair; it was more like a counseling session. She tells Austen what Shep said about Austen being him two years ago. Austen says he’s not up until 5 am, and Chelsea asks if he’s going to say something to Shep. Austen says, no, but it’s interesting. In her interview, Chelsea says sometimes Austen has no backbone. He cares too much what everyone thinks, and it’s an unattractive quality. I agree.

Peyton arrives. She sees Naomie, and tells Kathryn that she’s never been spoken to like that, and she lived in LA for five years. It’s like middle school. Kathryn says she got that right. Naomie approaches Peyton, and thanks her for coming. They stand there while crickets chirp, and Naomie asks to talk to Peyton on the patio. In her interview, Naomie says her reservations aren’t gone, but her dad was right; she needs to apologize. She tells Peyton that she owes her a big apology. She’s sorry about the way she attacked her; it’s just a defense mechanism. Peyton says she’s not after Craig. She knew had to do with him, because if someone is that angry, it has to do with love. Naomie says she projected her anger at him on Peyton, and cut her down without knowing her. She’s sorry. Peyton forgives her. In her interview, Naomie says she realizes the root of it is that she’s not over Craig. She and Peyton hug.

They sit down for dinner. Ooh, a seafood tower! Austen sits between Chelsea and Peyton, and Shep tells Whitney that he’s sitting between his two paramours. Whitney says he’s working overtime. They sound like a couple of middle school girls. Whitney tells Shep that Chelsea is on to his shenanigans. Shep slides outside. Thomas and Ashley have some PDA at the table. In her interview, Kathryn is shocked and proud that she gives zero f*cks. She’s glad she’s not that person.

Kathryn joins Shep outside. He ask if she had fun at the party. He gets nostalgic, remembering how they became friends. We flash back to four years ago on the beach, when Shep taught her to surf. Austen tells Whitney what Shep said was upsetting. He shouldn’t lie to make himself look better. Thomas and Ashley go out, and tell Shep they had to leave; sh*t is being talked about him. Inside, Whitney suggests bringing Shep into the conversation, and goes to get him. Austen is like, that’s okay, but Chelsea says they have his back. Whitney calls Shep in. Shep tells Austen that all he said was that Austen was having fun Downton. Austen says Shep claimed it reminded him of himself two years ago, and he thought that was a misrepresentation. He was trying to make himself look good, and Austen look bad. Shep says if it was perceived that way, he apologizes. They shake hands. In her interview, Chelsea says she keeps waiting for Austen to man up, and seeing herself with him in the future, but it’s not happening. Whitney is glad they resolved things. Austen suggests he and Chelsea get out of there, but Chelsea isn’t receptive in the least, and tells him to stop.

Next time, Cameran might be in labor, Patricia suggests an ultimatum to Ashley, and Thomas and Kathryn have dinner.

🍹🍸 Loving Jared on Southern Charm New Orleans. He’s the Yoda of the group. Also loving Uma Thurman on Imposters. Both shows are worth watching.

⚠ The new, and I think final, season of Girlfriend’s Guide to Divorce begins Thursday, June 14th.


April 30, 2018 – Sonny Makes a Compromise, the Jax Struggle is Real, a Sad Coda & NOLA Charm


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

At Kelly’s, Lulu thanks Jason for coming. He asks what happened that she’s on crutches, and she says she now knows not to chase Rocco in heels. She tells him that she needs advice on Henrik Faison.

Drew sees Sam coming out pf Peter’s office. He says he’s glad she’s safe. He was stopping by to see Peter, and asks if he’s in.

No, but Curtis is. Curtis rifles through papers in a cupboard. He pulls something out, and says, jackpot! Nina texts him that the meeting was finished early.

Nina comes home, telling Valentin that Peter called off the meeting. She wonders how Curtis is supposed to find dirt on Peter if he has no time to dig for it. Valentin asks where he’s digging, and she says Peter’s office. She asks what Valentin is looking at, and he shows her a picture of the box with the crest on it.

Anna pulls out a file. Robert assumes it’s Valentin’s, and she says it lists his known haunts in Bern. It lines up perfectly with when Henrik was born. Robert says he told her that Valentin delivered Henrik personally, and there’s her proof.

Sam tells Drew that he can check the conference room, but he says he’ll wait. Sam asks if she can buy him coffee. She has a lot to tell him.

Jason tells Lulu about the trip, and how Spinelli got arrested in Switzerland posing as Henrik. He asks if they found anything on Henrik, but she says, not much. The letters were gone. They weren’t in the safe deposit box. Henrik paid someone to access the box after Faison died and take them. For all they know, they’ve been destroyed. The good news is that Henrik is still around. Lulu says Henrik may be closer than he thinks. They’ve been in contact.

Nina asks why Valentin has the picture. He says it was in Faison’s belongings, and Robert thought he might know about it, since it’s the Cassadine crest. Nina says Valentin’s evil stepmother worked with him, and he says no one worked harder for that title than Helena. Nina asks why Robert would think the box was for him, when they’d never even met?

Anna tells Robert the evidence is paper thin, but Robert says, no. Valentin was positioned in Brussels, where she had her child. Anna insists that he was just there long enough to witness the hand-off to the midwife, but then says, she played right into his hands. She compromised herself with a DVX officer, got pregnant, and handed her child over. He only had to bide his time to use the child against her. The strategy is brilliant, and Valentin is one of the best. I hate to point it out, but Valentin never used the child against her, so where did that come from? She brought it up to him; not the other way around.

Sonny asks to talk to Diane before the bail hearing. Ava is smiling, and Carly asks why. Ava says it’s just a good day smiles, but guesses not so much for her. Thanks to Carly’s negligence, she’ll get her daughter back, and Avery will be raised in a safe, loving home like she should have been. Carly says it’s amazing that she claims to be doing this for Avery’s sake. She has no regard for taking Avery from her home when she doesn’t even know her. Ava asks whose fault is that? Carly says she’s going to take Avery from the only home she knows, and drag her back and forth like a trophy. Now tell her why she’s such a great mother.

Sonny tells Diane that Mike is an aging, sick man, who had no idea what he was doing when he walked away with Avery; he had no intention of hurting her. Diane says given his criminal record, and Sonny’s alleged connections, she’d be lying if she said there’s no chance he’ll go to prison. Sonny asks if this is where she says it’s impossible, then at the end pulls it off. She tells him that he needs to know the risk; it’s not a slam dunk, and Judge Lasser likes to think he’s tough on crime. Her best guess is that there’s a 30% chance Mike is convicted, but it leaves a 70% chance of him going free. Sonny doesn’t like the odds, but she says it’s all they have.

Carly tells Ava that she’s living in a fantasy world if she thinks she’ll get custody. Ava says, we’ll see. Carly says, Sonny aside, Ava can do nothing to prevent the day that Avery finds out Ava is responsible for her brother’s death. Some messes are too big to clean up, and some crimes don’t go away. Ava might have avoided jail, but one day, Avery will look her in the eye and her for who she is. Ava says, her mother, who loves her, and Carly says, we’ll see.

Sonny comes out, and asks to talk to Ava. Nelle – why is she there anyway? – tells Carly that she hopes they come to a compromise. Carly asks who she thinks she’s fooling. She loves seeing their family suffer.  Dante wants to check on his grandfather, but Diane says he’s not leaving her alone with these two.

Ava tells Sonny that she gets full custody, or his father goes to prison.

Lulu tells Jason that it’s the same email PK Sinclair was using. Jason says that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s Henrik. She says he’d like a chance to tell his side, but Jason asks if that isn’t what he’s doing with the book. Lulu says he wants to talk face to face. Jason says Faison got killed when he was brought out into the open. Why does she think Henrik will take the same chance? She believes it’s him, and Jason asks if she’s brought it to Dante? She says not yet; not until she has more to give. He asks if she thinks she’ll get it by meeting Henrik, and she says, that’s the idea, but he thinks it’s a bad one.

Nina asks Valentin what Robert’s deal is; what’s he like? Valentin says he’s like a WSB agent; overconfident. He answered all Robert’s questions, and they’re done. Nina says he thinks it’s done on his end, but that never stopped Anna. She wonders if Robert will follow suit. Valentin says it doesn’t matter. He’s not going to find what he’s looking for.

Curtis puts everything back, and sneaks out. He takes off his gloves, and jets. Peter sees him, and makes a frowny face.

Sonny asks Ava if she thinks she’s doing right by Avery. Does she remember how she lost custody in the first place? Ava says, the tape Carly stole. He says they still have it. Ava laughs, saying it’s old news no one cares about. Paul is in prison, and all they’ll see is that the DA coerced a suspect into sex. Why shouldn’t she get custody; she thinks he’s an unfit father. Sonny gets angry, saying it’s not negotiable. That’s it. He’s not going to do it.

Nelle brings Carly some tea, thinking she’d like it, but Carly says she’d like Nelle’s smarmy head on a platter. Geez. Not real smart to say things like that in a police station. Diane tells her this is not the place, and Dante says he’s out of there. Nelle wants to ask Diane for some legal advice about the baby; specifically, custody. Carly asks if Nelle is laying the groundwork for keeping the baby from them, and Nelle asks if Carly has been talking to Diane about it. Carly says Diane advised her on her rights as a grandparent. Nelle doesn’t know whether to be scared or encouraged. She wanted to talk about giving Carly custody.

Ava tells Sonny not to pretend he’s not scared; he’s terrified. He says he hates seeing his father like this, but he doesn’t like to operate by fear. He has the best lawyer, and medical advice from Ava’s boyfriend. It was an accident; there was no malicious intent, and the chances of Mike going to prison are slim. Ava asks if he’s willing to take that gamble. He tells her that his family has a lot of experience testifying in court. Even Griff will get on the stand and say Mike wouldn’t hurt a fly. He’s just a sick person who was confused. She says if he wants a judge to decide his father’s fate, let the cards fall where they may. He says even if Mike goes to prison, she’ll still have to sue him for custody, and he’ll still have whoever he needs, including Kiki. She testified once before and will again; she knows Ava is unfit. Ava says there is one alternate solution. She’ll drop the charges if he agrees to joint custody. I wonder if that was her plan from the beginning.

Curtis goes to Windemere. Nina asks how it went, and if he got her text. He says, it went, and yeah, he got her text, that’s why he got his ass out of there. She asks if he found anything, and he says, not a damn thingabout Peter.

Peter goes into his office and looks around, checking everything. He looks through his papers in the cabinet, and takes out a folder on Nathan.

Jason thinks Henrik is dangerous. He tells Lulu that Faison was a psycho, and he woke up in a clinic, drugged, restrained, and treated like an animal on Henrik’s orders. When he escaped, he was followed on Henrik’s orders. He’s good at what he does, but could barely stay alive long enough to get home. What if Henrik brings guys with him when he meets with Lulu? Why is she thinking that he’s harmless on any level when all the evidence says he’s not?

Sam tells Drew about Spinelli getting arrested, and how she stayed to help infiltrate the bank where Faison’s safe deposit box is. They found it, but the letters were gone. Henrik paid the bank manager to take the letters out and leave them in a drop box. She’s sorry. Drew says, him too. She’d like to talk to him about Aurora, and what happens next.

Ava tells Sonny, equal custody, including holidays and vacations, and all decisions will be made jointly. Sonny says, if he agrees, she’ll drop everything? She says she’ll need it in writing, but she’ll even speak on Mike’s behalf. Sonny will have the best of both worlds; his daughter and his father. He says, half daughter, and Ava says, half is better than none, and Mike stays safe. Do they have a deal?

Carly tells Nelle that she was under the impression Michael asked Jason, but Nelle says she’s having second thoughts. Jason’s life is up in the air, and he’s single. She wants two parents, even if it’s her and Sonny. She knows there’s no way Carly won’t love Michael’s baby, the same way she loves Avery, and fight for her the same way. She tells Carly to just think about it. She goes to the bathroom, and Diane tells Carly to batten down the hatches. Carly says she’s way ahead.

Dante brings out Mike. He asks where Sonny is, and Carly says talking to Ava. He asks why? Sonny hates her. He tells Carly to stop him. He doesn’t want Sonny making sacrifices for him.

Sonny asks if Ava feels good, taking advantage of his father’s illness like she did Morgan’s. She says she’s doing what’s best for Avery. Sonny says Griff might not see through her reconstructed face, but he does. He’s not going to forget this. Ava says if his father is any indication, he might. Ooh, snap!

Sam says she and Drew are in a strange place personally, but professionally, they still have the company. There’s a lot to do, and it’s just the beginning. She’d like to stay on, and asks if he sees a problem with that.

Lulu asks what if Jason is mistaken? He never saw Henrik at the clinic. What if the person holding him captive was Klein, and he did it without any orders? Maybe Henrik made choices because he was scared. Now that Faison is dead, things could have changed. He asks if she wants to take that chance. She says he’ll have his guard up with Jason, but not her. Jason says she’s not in his league. If she wants to play the game, she’ll get hurt.

Curtis says Peter is too careful to keep something around where someone can find it. Valentin says he has a meeting, and can’t leave fast enough. Nina tells Curtis thanks for trying. She’s sorry it was for nothing. He wouldn’t say nothing. He didn’t find Peter’s deep dark secret, but found something that’s off. He had a file on Nathan.

Anna says somehow, Valentin acquired her child and delivered him to Faison; the thing she feared most. She doesn’t think he’s a danger anymore. He has a kid of his own and has felt love. Then, he was young, angry, and felt rejected. She was young, angry, and ambitious. Faison was already duplicitous, but not a full-blown sociopath; he was a rising star at the DVX. They were all young and misguided. Robert says it sounds like she’s giving Valentin a pass.

Nina wonders why Peter would have a folder on her brother. Curtis doesn’t know, but it was thick. Curtis says he was there when Nathan got shot. Maybe it has something to do with survivor’s guilt. Nina suggests maybe it has nothing to do with Nathan, but with Maxie. Maybe he’s getting information on how to get close to her. Curtis says they have no proof, but Nina insists Peter has an agenda. They have to turn up the heat.

Peter tells Valentin that he thought Valentin said he was handling his wife. Her PI was rooting through his office. There was nothing to find, but he will if he keeps digging. Valentin tells Peter that Robert asked about this, showing him the picture of the box. It was found in his father’s safe deposit box. Peter didn’t know it was in there. He’d paid someone to remove the letters and put them in a universal drop, after which they were destroyed. There’s nothing to connect him. Valentin says Robert knows Peter went to school in Switzerland – the same time Valentin was there.

Anna doesn’t understand how Valentin could use an innocent child. Why take the child from a loving home, and give him to someone so cold and unfeeling? Why would he want the child to have that kind of life? Robert asks what she wants to do about it, but she says she can’t do anything. He suggests they go to Windemere, but she says they can’t confront Valentin. Robert asks why not? She says he’s been hiding the secret for decades, and won’t allow it to unravel at this point. They’ll have to sit on this. The most important thing is that Jason is going after Henrik, and will treat him as a threat. He doesn’t care about the rest. Robert says to leave Jason to him.

Lulu tells Jason that she’ sorry he didn’t get answers. He says it wasn’t a complete waste of time. They found something else. He tells her about the conundrum box, saying it can only be opened safely by the recipient. She asks if Faison left it for Henrik, but Jason says if he did, Henrik doesn’t know about it. He tells her that it has the Cassadine crest on it, and she asks if he thinks Valentin is involved. Jason’s money is on Helena, and Lulu calls it the twisted partnership that keeps on giving. Jason says he loves Sam and Danny more than anything. He knew the risks, and didn’t come back for five years. He came back; Nathan never will. Maxie will always grieve, and their child will have no father. Is that a gamble she wants to take, causing her family that kind of pain? She says he’s given her a lot to think about.

Sam doesn’t want to rush into anything. Drew says the company is half hers. More than half, but he’ll be partners if that’s what she wants.

Carly tells Diane that Nelle doesn’t want her or Sonny near her kid. Diane asks how to respond. Mike wants to talk to Sonny, and tells Carly that Sonny is making a mistake. He doesn’t want Sonny to lose his daughter because of him. Sonny and Ava come out. Diane wonders if she dares to ask. Sonny says they’ve come to an agreement. Sonny is giving Ava joint custody. He tells Diane to make everything equal, and coordinate with Scotty. Mike tells him, don’t do this, but Sonny says it’s already done. He pats Mike on the shoulder.

Drew tells Sam if they’re going to work together, they’ll have to separate their personal and professional lives. Sam agrees.

Curtis says Sam caught him. Nina thought she was on a trip, but Curtis says she came back early. She threatened to call the cops, so he came clean, but said he was just looking into Peter’s background without saying who hired him. She promised to keep it to herself as long as he shares what he finds. Nina believes Sam, and says two heads are better than one. The faster they smoke out Peter, the better.

Peter asks Valentin if he thinks Robert is that close. If he is, it’s time to shut him down.

Robert meets Jason, who wants to get on with finding Henrik. Robert asks why he’s in a rush. Jason says he wants to find Henrik and neutralize him before anyone gets hurt. Robert tells him that Valentin claims he doesn’t know about the box. Jason asks if Robert believes Valentin, and Robert says, no, but he can’t do anything until they can get the box open. Jason suggests they dangle what Henrik wants in front of him – his mother.

Anna remembers Valentin agreeing with her that no child should have that monster for a father.

Sonny asks what time court is, and Diane says, now. Mike tells Sonny there must be some way around this. Diane says to let her do the talking, but Sonny says, not all. Ava says she would like to tell the judge that it was a simple breakdown in communication between her and Carly. Since she’s gotten to know Mike, she knows he’s a good guy, and would never knowingly cause harm to a child. Avery is safe and sound, and she would like the same for Mike, so he gets the care he needs to ensure something like this doesn’t happen again. Nelle tells Carly that she’s glad everything worked out. Carly walks away. Mike tells Sonny this is wrong, but Sonny says it’s not a big deal. He can’t keep Avery away from her mother indefinitely. Everything will be okay. Mike says now is the time he should stop telling himself that.

Tomorrow, Curtis needs to ask TJ a question, Nelle needs to tell Michael something, and Carly is starting to question herself.

Vanderpump Rules

Tom shaves his eyebrows. He has some last minute preparations for the TomTom progress party. Even though it’s not open, it’s still a celebration. He’s been working on cocktail recipes for ten years. We see clips of that. He says tonight, people are getting a little taste of what’s to come with TomTom.

Katie highlights her face. Schwartz talks to the dogs. We flash back to Schwartz’s early years, and Lisa telling him to grow the eff up. He says he’s ready to grow up, or at least move on to the next chapter. Katie thinks he looks hot, but should wear shoes.

Tom tells Ariana that he and Schwartz are giving Ken and Lisa a $25K check. It’s an investment in their future. He just hopes she doesn’t cash both at the same time.

Jax hasn’t heard from Brittany, even though he’s texted her a thousand times. He thinks she just needs time, because he’s a moron. He’s going to see her at the party, and he wants to know how she’s doing. She left the dogs??? I would never leave my kids with Jax.

Stassi says he’s going to try hard to get her back, but Brittany doesn’t care; she’s going to look hot and flirt with Adam. Stassi is thrilled, saying it’s about time. She’s dreamt about killing Jax. She tells Brittany if anything happens, she’ll do her best. Brittany tells her he wants to stay in the building, but she’ll move if she has to. Stassi understands up and down relationships, but this is another level. Brittany asks if Patrick is going to be there. In her interview, Stassi says she’s going to smush her feelings, and if that doesn’t work, she has Xanax. She gives Brittany the ultimate compliment – you look so skinny.

Giggy! Ken comes to Lisa’s dressing room. He tells her that he’s getting Giggy ready first, since he’s coming along. Lisa hopes Jax doesn’t come. She thinks Jax’s days at SUR might be over. He was fired from his relationship, maybe he should be fired from his job. He acted like a complete a-hole. We flash back to that. In her interview, Lisa says if someone worked for her that long and had a meltdown, she might make allowances, but it’s extraordinary how Jax gets a pass. He needs to realize his choices aren’t okay. She’s pissed, but Ken just wants to love on Giggy and dress him up. Me too.

Schwartz and Tom arrive pre-party to set up. Tom sees a grand entrance rather than a construction site. He sees a beautiful bar with amazing cocktails. He sees it all. He sees his future, and it looks freakin’ awesome. Stassi and Brittany get there first; Peter, James, and Raquel follow. Stassi can’t believe two of her best friends are opening a bar and they get to see it. The cocktails are literally smoking, and she says she loves drinks that look like witch’s brew. Ariana and Katie are next. In her interview, Katie says it’s the first step toward a Lisa Vanderpump life with swans, a moat, and a black Bentley. Ariana suggests thrones for the guys. Suddenly, the other guests are just there. Brittany says she won’t stay at the apartment if Jax is staying in the same building. Jax comes strolling in, and Brittany stares at the ceiling. Lala says he looks like a dog with its tail between its legs. She tells Brittany that it was not meant to be. She says Brittany looks amazing; like she’s ready to run sh*t. Amen, sister!

Lisa, Ken, and Giggy! arrive. Lisa asks how much the frozen shot-maker cost, and Tom says it was a bargain. It’s the only one in the US. In his interview, he explains he went to a bar show in Vegas, and thinks the machine will set them apart. Lisa tries one. Ariana says it’s like an alcoholic popsicle. Lisa is impressed, and asks if you can really get drunk on it. In her interview, she says it’s pure genius, and what she wanted. Something different.

Next, Tom has SUR bartender Wesley model the new uniform, which includes a short-sleeved shirt, tie, and vest. They’re going to indicate they’re staff with pins instead of screen printing. Lisa is pleasantly surprised. She loves that it’s innovative, and they did it on their own. She tells them to milk the praise. It’s probably the last they’re going to get. In his interview, Schwartz says he’s always been seeking approval from Lisa on some level. He’s going to emulate Ken, and maybe get a little dog.

Jax approaches Lisa. She’s surprised he came, and he says he can leave if she wants. She asks if she said that, and tells him she does want to talk to him later. He gets all weird and defensive, talking in staccato sentences. He suggests they talk now, but she tells him later. He keeps babbling, and she asks if he’s listening to what she’s saying. Not now.

Tom shows everyone around. Kristen sees PUMP from the balcony, and says they’ll be even more raging alcoholics than ever. Scheana wears a pink hard hat, and Rob marvels at the kick in the smoking drink. Jax talks to James, saying it’s better this way. He and Brittany aren’t happy, and when you’re not happy, you have to move on. James says he heard Brittany went home with a guy she met at In & Out Burger. In his interview, James says just to see Jax upset, pissed, and lonely makes him happy, since Jax tried to ruin his relationship. We flash back to Jax insisting James had cheated on Raquel. James says that’s what you get, and maybe Jax should find a chick his own age and move away. Just a thought. Jax tells Rob that Brittany wants to get married and have kids, but he doesn’t. Rob says Scheana is the same way. She talks about getting married when she just got a divorce, and he wants her to pump the brakes on social media. James joins them, and talks about what Scheana said to encourage Brittany, including that she has great boobs. Jax points out that he paid for them. I don’t even have to point out that Jax is the lowest of the lowlifes. He’s proving it for me all over the place.

Lala talks to Lisa about her showcase, saying she was in her element and totally herself. Lisa says she’s proud. Lala should have the confidence in herself that Lisa has in her. Lisa asks if Lala remembers when she used to walk away. Lala says now she’s on stage. Lisa tells Lala that she created a monster, but Lala says she created a badass.

Tom and Schwartz write the checks. Lisa asks if they’re going to bounce. They all hug. In his interview, Schwartz says writing the second check hurts so good. They’ll have to hold off on the Jet skis for a while. Ariana gives Tom a gift of a giant knife that I guess is used to open bottles, because the companion gift is a bottle of Dom Perignon. Tom pops the cork with the knife, and welcomes everyone to TomTom. Lisa says she loves all of them. She watched them grow up; some more quickly, and some not at all. She’s happy and proud to call Tom and Schwartz junior partners. She’s happy they’re moving forward. A huge moment has come to fruition.

Everyone moves on to PUMP. Stassi tells Katie that this made it real. Patrick shows up. Stassi is glad he’s there. She was afraid people would start thinking he wasn’t real. Brittany says Adam is a gentleman. In her interview, Brittany says she hasn’t been single in years, and has forgotten how to flirt. Lala says everyone thinks Brittany is hot.

Jax does shots with Scheana and Tom. Lisa tells Ken the cocktails were crazy. James asks to sit with them. Ken says he’s taking Giggy for a wee-wee, but first tells James that he’s doing a lot better, and gives him an envelope of cash. It’s some extra money for his Tuesday gig, since they did so well. Ken leaves with Giggy, and Lisa says she really feels he’s improved, and wants him back at SUR. James says he wasn’t expecting it; it’s a dream. In his interview, he’s worked very hard, and seen the difference. He’s not taking things for granted anymore. He didn’t realize how much he missed SUR until it was gone.

James tells the others – James, one; Jax, zero. For one brief, shining moment, I love James.

Adam talks to Brittany. He says she’s a good person. Jax tells Scheana he sees what she’s doing, trying to hook them up. Scheana says whatever they want to do is on them. Stassi wants to introduce Patrick to Lisa, and she’s nervous. She’s hard on their significant others. She appreciates it, but it makes her stomach swirl. Lisa says they’ve met before. Stassi didn’t think Lisa would remember. In her interview, Lisa explains she was in New York, doing radio shows. When she found out Patrick worked there, she came by and waved. Patrick says he liked watching her walk away. Being British, Lisa doesn’t even bat and eye, and thanks him for his kind words. Lisa asks if they’re good, and Patrick says, perfect. He asks if all couples aren’t perfect. Lisa is like, what? and Stassi says this is one of the reasons she loves him; they’re both incredibly dry and sarcastic. Lisa says Stassi isn’t herself, and asks if she’s sober. I’m wondering the same thing, since neither one of them are making any sense, and keep stammering. Patrick wanders off, and Stassi follows, telling Lisa that she’s going to protect her boyfriend.

Jax tells James that he loves Brittany, but when you love someone, you set them free. Jax never ceases to top himself on being the most horrible human on earth. If indeed he is human. Schwartz and Lisa talk about Tom and Ariana having a PDA session on a bench. Ariana says they’ve been through a lot, and we flash back to that. She loves that they’ve come through it to the other side, and the future is looking bright. I’m glad someone’s is.

Brittany says she let Jax control her and run her down, but it’s not happening anymore. She decides to talk to Jax, and he makes the mistake of asking her how she’s doing. She says he put her through hell. She wants to move on, and doesn’t need to see him; she’s at her limit. She says he’s wrong; wrong about how he treated her, wrong about how he ended it, and wrong about what did to her with the cheating. Jax keeps repeating, you’re right. Brittany says he’s so self-focused, and after everything she’s done for him. He gets all defensive, asking if he hasn’t done anything for her. She tells him to quit acting like he takes care of her. He’s a liar and a cheater. She’s not letting him manipulate her anymore. She pays half the rent and half the bills (which is certainly more than Jax led everyone to believe), and taken a lot of sh*t. She’s not letting him come at her. She’s fine on her own, and happy being on her own, because she deserves better. Jax says he’s been telling everyone that. She says the reason she stayed is, when she loves, she gives it her all. He says he knows; he ended it. She accuses him of being happy to say that. In his interview, he claims he was just trying to do the right thing. He gets up, telling her goodnight, and she says he’s not moving down the hall. He tells her not even Jesus Christ can stop him. She calls him disgusting, relieving me of my duty to do so.

Katie says she heard Lisa met Patrick. Lisa says it seemed awkward; Stassi is not on her game. Katie thinks Stassi is uncomfortable. In her interview, Lisa says Stassi is a bright individual, but tends to pick guys who put her down. She doesn’t want that for any woman. Katie says Stassi is tightly wound. Lisa has no interest in making her uncomfortable, but repeats that it was awkward.

Patrick asks if they should leave, but Stassi doesn’t want to leave sad. Lisa comes to their table, and says they got off on the wrong start. She says she was just playing with Patrick the way he was when he’d said he liked the view. She tells Stassi that she just wants her to find someone who loves her and treats her right. Patrick says he treats her well, and he’s right there. Lisa says she was referring to Stassi’s history, but I wonder. She says if they love each other, it’s good enough for her. Patrick says they’re good then, but she still has a great ass, and makes a few other inappropriate comments. In her interview, Lisa says not only is she old enough to be his mother, he’s saying this in front of his girlfriend who used to work for her. The only ass is the one in front of her. Agreed. He might be minus the man bun, but he’s no less an idiot. Lisa asks if Stassi is okay; she doesn’t want a misunderstanding.

When Lisa is gone, Stassi apologizes to Patrick. I’m flabbergasted, since she has no reason to. She says if he’s going to break up with her, please don’t let it be tonight. Oh no. Stassi is so much better than this. In her interview, Stassi says she loves Patrick, and wants it to work out. If he wasn’t around, it would be like a limb was gone, which she recognizes says something about her; maybe she has a screw loose. She says, sorry, and Patrick gets up. In her interview, she says he blocks her on social media and on his phone, but she still loves him and wants to be with him. She’s cray. They leave PUMP.

Schwartz tells Lisa and Ken that he’s been a little wishy-washy, and thanks them for sticking with him. They toast, and Tom says appreciation is an understatement. In his interview, Schwartz says he feels his balls starting to drop; they’re plump and robust. I’m dying laughing. Ken says he’s beginning to believe in them, and everyone clinks glasses. James tells Brittany that her eyebrows looked good when she was berating Jax. She’s got this.

Lisa tells Jax that it’s time to talk. Schwartz asks her to go easy on him. Jax sits at the table, and the first thing he does is tells Lisa she looks good. I don’t even have the words to say how much I despise him and his technique. He apologizes, saying he’s never acted that way before; his friends say he was possessed. Lisa says she’s given him chances, and he blatantly disrespected her. He says he’s sorry, and she says it’s one thing being sorry, and another acting sorry. He says he’s sorry he ruined everyone’s life. He doesn’t know what to do anymore. In her interview, Lisa says she has to be careful. Jax is a player, and could be playing her. She tells him that she’s not going down this emotional road, and dabs at her eyes. Jax asks what she wants him to do, and she says grow the eff up. In his interview, Jax says if he goes to Florida, he’ll literally be leaving everyone behind and starting over. He hurt everyone, even though he thought he was on the right path. He asks if she’s going to fire him, but she says she knows what he’d do with that – act like a victim. It will always be about him. She says he should do the decent thing. He wants someone to tell him what that is, and she says, hand in his resignation. What he should have done a while ago. He says, okay. He’s sorry he put her through hell, and doesn’t deserve working for her. Does she think this sounds as bullsh*tty as I do? Lisa tells him there’s nothing more to be said. He thanks her, and leaves.

In her interview, Lisa says she looks at all of them. Lala is growing up, Tom and Schwartz have the bar, and James is doing better. She’s emotionally involved with them. We go down Jax Memory Lane – his nose job, his next nose job, wearing a dress at Villa Rosa. Lisa says Jax is still making the same mistakes he was making six years ago. If he can’t wake up, she’ll do it for him.

James toasts to TomTom. Tom tells Jax to sit, but Jax says he has to blow. It’s not right for him to be there. In his interview, Jax says he’s worked for over seven years at SUR, but that train has come to a stop. He’s literally starting from scratch.

James tells Raquel that he loves her, and she says she’s proud of him. Lala and Brittany toast to chicks knowing what the eff they want, Lisa says SUR might be looking for a new bartender, and James says, huh? Jax walks down the road. Well, the sidewalk anyway.

Next time, the reunion – with tension so bad, even Rob can’t fix it.

😭 Here’s the really sad epilogue. Along with Shep from Southern Charm, Jax was on Watch What Happens Live tonight. He and Brittany are back together. They showed a clip from the reunion, and sadly, Jax’s father died. I don’t wish that on anyone – even Jax. But that’s still no reason. Seriously. Wtf? Shep was at least honest in saying he doesn’t make any commitments. I’ve said it before, I think Shep would make a great friend, but dating? No. Not unless you don’t want it to go any further than that. He seems like a nice guy though. Unlike Jax. Who is lower than a worm. He also didn’t take the Florida job, suddenly claiming that the only reason he considered it, was because his father lived there. Which he’d never mentioned once. That’s if there ever was a job. As Judge Marilyn Milian says, I wouldn’t believe his tongue if it came notarized.

🍹 It’s surprised me that I’m enjoying Southern Charm New Orleans. I’m quite attached to Charleston and the original group, but NOLA has a distinctly different vibe. The cast seems to actually work at jobs, although it has gotten to the point where there’s too much drinking going on. The architecture and music are enough to give it a look. And of course, little dogs.


New Orleans Bourbon Street NOLA2



April 26, 2018 – Curtis Gets Caught, Peyton Arrives in Charleston, a Little Rambling & Sheldon


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Alexis’s phone rings. It’s Sam; she’s home. Alexis notes her use of the word “we.” She tells Sam the kids are at Monica’s. She asks if the trip was good, and Sam says they’ll talk later.

Sam opens the door to Maxie with Crimson paperwork. She says it’s crowded in the office.

Lulu comes into Peter’s office on crutches. She explains she broke her foot while chasing Rocco. Peter asks if she needs a leave-of-absence, but she came for some advice. Henrik hasn’t responded to her asking for a meeting, and there’s too much up in air for her next move. Peter thinks a meeting might be too drastic. Lulu agrees. The more comfortable Henrik is with her, the more clues he might reveal. Peter asks if she’s gotten anything so far.

Curtis goes to Windemere. He needs her advice. She asks if it’s about Peter, and he says, it’s about marriage. She and Valentin have managed to make things work. Nina can’t talk right now, and he needs to get into Peter’s office. She’d love to talk his ear off about marriage when they’re done with Peter. He’ll be at the senior staff meeting, and it’s the perfect opportunity. With impeccable soap timing, Valentin appears, and asks, for what?

Anna and Robert go to Kelly’s. Anna needs caffeine. Robert remembers the days when she didn’t have jet lag. Anna remembers the days when he had a mullet. He wonders what Emma is going to tell her class about the trip, and Anna says like a good operative, she’ll say nothing. Anna asks for his tablet, so she can look at the conundrum box. She says Faison left it for someone to find, but who? Robert says, someone with last name of Cassadine.

Maxie asks where Sam was. Sam gives her a hint: The Alps and banks. She gives Maxie some chocolate, and explains about Danny putting his thumb on the globe to decide where to go. Maxie says whenever she does that, it always lands on the Indian Ocean. Sam says they hiked so much, she can eat all the chocolate she wants. She tells Maxie that Jason and Spinelli showed up, and they all worked on a case. She asks why Maxie is there, an Maxie says she didn’t want to risk running into Lulu. Fortunately, she has friends who care, like Sam and Peter. For someone she barely knew, he’s been incredibly supportive.

Lulu tells Peter that Henrik seems eager to share his side of story; he did write the book. He wants the world to know he was a victim, not an accomplice, although he was involved with Klein and holding Jason captive. Peter says his intent was unknown, and he was instrumental in keeping Jason alive. She says that’s why she came to him instead of her editor. He seems to understand what drives a man like Henrik. Peter thinks she’s smart enough to trust her own instincts; Dante should be relieved. He realizes Lulu hasn’t told him.

Nina says Valentin will never guess why Curtis came by, and he says, she’s right. She says he has marriage on his mind. Curtis says he’s been thinking about stuff, and weighing it. He admires how they make their marriage work, and Nina graciously offered to give him pointers. Curtis asks if Valentin has any hints for a brother taking the plunge. Valentin says, honesty, and tells them to drop the side thing. He asks what’s going on.

Anna tells Robert that she’s not sure Valentin and Faison ever crossed paths. Robert says Valentin has turned up in unexpected places. Anna thinks the box was meant for Helena. They worked closely, and Helena was a big influence. Faison’s will was textbook Helena. He was always cruel, but it had her spitefulness. Robert starts to nod off, and claims he’s thinking about paperwork. Anna calls him a liar, and gets up to leave. She tells him that she has an idea, and jets. He realizes she took his tablet.

Finn asks Alexis if anything is wrong, and she says Sam is back from her big trip. She hopes everything works out, and Finn asks if she means spiritually, professionally, or emotionally. She says, all three. Sam has a lot to confront. She tells Finn an interlude can only last so long until you have to go back to reality. He thought they agreed enjoy journey, and she says, she did, but she’s not that girl. She buys trip insurance on the way to the airport; she’s a planner. Spontaneity doesn’t typically end well for her. Finn says there’s always an exception to the rule. She asks if he wants to do it again, and he says, yes. They jump onto the couch.

Maxie tells Sam before she says it, she’s not filling in the gap with Lulu. Lulu is selfish and has a sense of entitlement. She never faces any consequences. She throws up her hands and says she’s a Spencer, and gets a free pass. She’s done with it. Sam tells her the difference between a catastrophic screw-up and maliciousness, is intent. Maxie says Lulu won’t even admit she’s wrong; she just defends her intent. She says Nathan was a willing participant, so it’s his fault, not hers. Nothing is ever Lulu’s fault. Lulu makes her bitter and angry, and it’s not good for the baby. She’d rather talk about her new unexpected friend Peter.

Peter thought Lulu didn’t tell Dante because of Avery being missing. Lulu says she’s grateful Avery has been found, but Dante’s family has been through turmoil. She admits that’s just an excuse. She’s not ready to tell him. If she’s going to justify it, she needs more than a couple of emails. She need to get to the truth, and draw Henrik out of hiding.

Nina tells Valentin they have nothing to hide, and Valentin says, then why not just tell him. She says she knew he’d react this way, and tells Curtis to take notes; this is where it gets fun. Valentin says he knows she hired Curtis to dig up dirt on Peter. Nina says, not to dig up dirt, to find the truth; there’s a difference. Valentin asks if she found what she was looking for.

Sam didn’t realize Maxie and Peter were so close. Maxie says it surprised her too, but he’s easy to be around, and he cares. She doesn’t have to pretend she’s not a total mess He even went with her when she had the baby tested for Huntington’s Disease. He was supportive, like he had a stake in it. Sam says he does – her. Maxie wishes Nina felt like that. She thinks she should the only one Maxie leans on. Sam says she has to understand that Maxie has a process she needs to go through. Maxie says sometimes it’s just easier with Peter. He got her out of the MetroCourt to face the memories. He went with her to the apartment, and crashed on the couch in case she had a breakdown. The first thing she saw was a package with a baby blanket that Nathan ordered, and she was pretty emotional about it. Peter got her to focus on the good memories, and how excited she and Nathan were about the baby. Sam says there’s clearly more to Peter than they thought.

Finn and Alexis get busy. A timer goes off, and she says it’s her casserole. She’s all excited, and runs into the kitchen. The doorbell rings, and she asks him to get it. It’s Anna, who tells him that he missed a button. He says, she’s home. She says, he’s not. He asks her in, and she says, sorry, she should have called. She needs to discuss a legal matter with Alexis. Finn says that’s his cue to leave, and kisses Alexis goodbye. Anna says it looks like things are going well. They fumble a little with small talk, and Anna shows her the box on Robert’s tablet. She asks if Alexis has seen it.

Valentin tells Nina that he thought they shared everything. She says she told him that she hired Curtis. He says she’s perilously close to defamation. She says she’s protecting Maxie, since her brother isn’t there to do it, and why is Valentin is protecting Peter over Maxie?

Sam tells Maxie that she was thinking about stepping down from Aurora. She owns it with Drew. It was his dream, and they wanted to do it as family. She needs to find time with herself, and figure out who she is. It sounds cliché, but as an independent woman, she doesn’t want to be behind a desk. She’s a PI, and pretty damn good at it. She wants to focus on that.

The waitress tells Robert that his cronut will be out shortly.  He gets a call from Frisco, and asks if the box was x-rayed. He takes notes with a crayon he finds on the table, and writes, lithium alloy, no x-ray. He guesses it wasn’t meant for Helena. Finn walks in, and orders a gallon of coffee and a cronut. The waitress says they’re out of them, and he asks, what about this one? picking up the cronut meant for Robert. Robert asks what he thinks he’s doing.

Sam tells Maxie about posing as a prospective client at the bank. Maxie asks if they robbed it, and Sam says they infiltrated it. Maxie asks if they took anything, which constitutes robbery, and Sam says whatever they took will be put to good use, and she sleeps well at night. Maxie says, what if they’d gotten caught, but Sam says they have so much dirt on the bank manager, he practically works for them now. Sam just wants Maxie to be happy, and Maxie says, her too, but she’ll get there eventually. Sam thinks it’s great that Maxie is holding on to good memories and moving forward; it makes her feel better about what she did. She asks if Maxie remembers putting things in boxes for the homeless shelter, and Maxie says it was the worst mistake, and Sam is glad she said that. Sam goes to the closet, and gives Maxie a box, saying she kept this for her. Maxie thanks her, and we all get teary.

Valentin says he’s trying to protect Nina’s job; Peter is the CEO of her parent company. This could be considered corporate espionage and grounds for termination at the very least. Nina says let them try; they’d be lost without her. Valentin says as much as the magazine would suffer without her, she would suffer without her job. It fuels her creativity and means something to her. She says Maxie means more. Valentin asks if they’ve tapped Peter’s phones or hacked his computer, but Curtis says, nothing like that; he’s just done some preliminaries. Valentin suggest he be discreet. He can see how much Nina has to lose. Curtis says he has a renewed appreciation for the bachelor life, but Nina says they’ll work it out; stay tuned. Valentin says he just got a front row seat to the negotiations in marriage. Nina tells Valentin that if Curtis and Jordan don’t make it to the altar, it’s his fault. He tells her that she’s looking for trouble where there isn’t any, and she hopes so. He tells her that if they find anything, tell him.

Robert tells Finn to put the cronut back. Finn offers to pay him for it, but he says it’s not for sale. Finn says he’s the shower guy. He heard him in Anna’s room. They introduce themselves, and Finn asks if he’s with Anna now.

Alexis recognizes the crest, but not the box. Anna explains that it’s a conundrum box, imprinted so no one except the recipient can open it or it self-destructs. Alexis says it sounds like something you’d find on Cassadine Island. She wishes she could be more helpful, and asks if it has anything to do with her search for Faison’s son. Anna says it’s a WSB matter. She has another matter she wanted to discuss with Alexis; adding a codicil to her will. She wants to make sure her children are provided for. Alexis says, children? Anna says her heirs; Robin has two children now. Alexis says if she’d like another attorney, she can recommend Diane, but Anna says she trusts Alexis with her affairs, immediately realizing her poor choice of words. She tells Alexis that she’ll call next time.

Peter tells Lulu that he has to prepare for a meeting. It’s supposed to be on policy, but inevitably, someone asks about the budget, so he has to be on his game. She asks if he thinks she’s right in playing the long game and keeping Dante in the dark for now. He tells her to trust her instincts. She thinks Henrik is probably like everyone else, somewhere in the middle; not a hero or a villain. It haunts her that Faison wasn’t not like everyone else. There were no shades of grey; he was cruel, twisted, and evil. He was Henrik’s father, and no matter how bad Henrik might be, it’s not his fault; he didn’t have a chance. Peter tells Lulu that her compassion and humanity make her a great reporter.

Maxie goes through the box, and says she thought it was gone. Sam offers to keep it there, but Maxie says she doesn’t think she can ever leave it again. She can’t thank Sam enough. They hug. Sam tells her that friends don’t always do what we want, and sometimes fail miserably, but they’re still friends. Maxie says some things are unforgivable. She’s suddenly hungry, and says she’s going to Kelly’s. She invites Sam along, but Sam has something to take care of, and there’s no putting it off.

Nina has to get to the meeting. Valentin tells her whatever she and Curtis have planned, keep him in the loop. She insists they know what they’re doing, but he says only one of them went to spy school. She needs an alibi in case they get caught. She says in this case, the less he knows, the better.

Finn tells Robert it’s none of his business. His association with Anna was temporary, and now it’s over. Robert asks if he figures she’s not worth fighting for, and Finn says he’s staying away for his own protection. Robert says he needs the cronut more, and leaves. He runs into Anna outside, and she returns his tablet. He tells her to ask next time, and she says, like he asked to share her hotel room? He tells her that there’s a guy in danger of eating his heart out inside. She goes in, and sees Finn.

Nina stops by Peter’s office, and says he’d better get going. He says he thought of delegating it to her, but she thinks they need to hear from the CEO. They leave, and Nina says she’ll be right there. She texts Curtis that the coast is clear. She turns out the light and shuts the door.

Maxie sees Lulu sitting outside Kelly’s. She asks what happened, and Lulu explains. Maxie asks if Lulu wants her to tell the waitress she’s out there. Lulu says she’s just resting, and Maxie tells her to feel better. Lulu calls her back, and says thanks.

Curtis goes into Peter’s office, and looks around with a flashlight.

On the phone, Valentin tells someone that they need to call him. They’re in more trouble than they think. Robert strolls into the living room. Valentin asks how he got in, and he says he knows his way around. Robert loves what he’s done with the place.

Alexis picks up Finn’s tie and remembers them talking about giving it a try.

Anna sits with Finn. She says he met her ex, and he nods.

Curtis continues looking around. He hears someone. Sam walks in, and asks what he’s doing there.

Tomorrow, Ava tells Nelle that Sonny is getting payback, Sam asks Curtis is there’s something about Peter they don’t know, Anna tells Finn that she’s not the person everyone believes she is, and Diane says Mike might not be going home.

Southern Charm

Craig reads the paper, Shep practices putting, Naomie feeds the cat, Austen puts on a facial mask, and Cameran bounces on a giant ball, asking the baby to move lower.

Cameran says Michael is the best gift. Patricia loaned him to her. He brings her a bunch of supplies and a mixer for making baby food. He says it’s easier than it seems, but she says she’ll be buying Gerber. She asks if Michael will rub her feet and not feel weird; Jason won’t do it. Michael says he’d be glad to. Jason is her husband; he’s a domestic. Cameran says, best gift ever, but feels like Michael is cheating on Patricia.

Craig video chats with his parents. His mom says he looks a little drunk, and he says he just took a nap. She asks how his sewing is going, and he’s going for a pillowcase a night. He says he and Naomie are so emotionally charged when they see one another, they don’t know how to handle it. She runs at the first sign of trouble. They speak different languages. His parents say they’ve been married a long time, and are still navigating that. Craig is interested in calling a life coach that he met. He knows his problems, but hasn’t done anything to fix it.

Thomas meets JD (bleh) for lunch. Thomas got in a workout and JD says he’s doing eight-ounce free-weights. Oh, har-har-hardy-har-har, you idiot. Thomas asks what’s going on. JD said he was single, but showed up at the shower with Elizabeth. JD says they’re staying friends, and decided to go to the shower together. Thomas tells him it confused everyone, and JD says it’s complicated; they have three kids. Thomas says if they’re really doing it for the kids, they should stay apart, but be harmonious. In his interview, Thomas says it was better for him and Kathryn to be apart. The negative energy isn’t healthy for the kids. He tells JD he has to protect himself. JD appreciates the advice, which probably means it went in one ear and out the other. It went quickly too, since there’s nothing in there. Thomas says it’s a role reversal.

Kathryn calls Cameran who only has three more weeks to go. Kathryn asks what’s going on. Cameran hates that Kathryn couldn’t come to the shower. In her interview, Kathryn says she had so much baggage with Patricia, and we flash back to her imitating Patricia, but with a British accent. Now, now she sees that Patricia is Patricia, but she’s still Petty Patricia. She tells Cameran that she asked Ashley to lunch. Cameran says that takes balls. Kathryn wants to make sure she’s not crazy, since she’s around Kathryn’s kids.

Shep meets Peyton for lunch. She was one of his dates on RelationShep. He welcomes her to Charleston. She already has a job at a doggy daycare, and got peed on by a Great Dane twice today. In his interview, Shep says they dated last year, but it didn’t work out. He’s never not been friends with anyone he’s dated, after the fact. As long as didn’t attack him or mortally wound a family member, they’re okay. Peyton asks if he’s chilled on parties. He says he has, but he’s ready again after laying low for a few days. He asks if she wants him to set something up with a group, and she likes the idea. She already knows Austen. She says they hung out the other night, and went to dinner and a movie. He says she’s off to the races. I his interview, Shep says he gets them on base and Shep knocks them in. We flash back to Chelsea having dated Shep first. He tells Peyton that Austen is a good person from a good family. Shep is really a nice guy; he’s just not marriage material. I’d totally be friends with him, but I’d never date him.

Kathryn cracks her knuckles waiting for Ashley at the restaurant. It seems like everyone eats and drinks outside in Charleston. I’m not keen on eating outside, especially in the heat. Ashley asks if she wants a cocktail, and Kathryn says she doesn’t drink. In her interview, Kathryn says, are you kidding? She tells Ashley that she’s never met any of Thomas’s girlfriends, and thought they should get to know each other. She doesn’t know what impression Thomas has made about her, but she just wants to work together. The first step would have been for him to tell her that he had a serious girlfriend, and she has a lot of questions. Ashley says her parents are divorced, and she knows what it’s like. Everyone was shocked when she moved there, and her parents were concerned, thinking she wasn’t making the best decision. She tells Kathryn that she met the kids after a week. In her interview, Kathryn says, per their agreement, she and Thomas aren’t allowed to introduce the children to romantic prospects. If she slips up once, she can’t see the kids, but he can do what he wants and still gets full custody. She asks if that says anything about men with money in Charleston. It took her years and crazy fights to realize that got her nowhere. She tells Ashley all she cares about is consistency.

Cameran meets Danni and Leva. Leva is one of her best friends, and it’s been a blessing being pregnant together. They sniff Danni’s wine. Cameran can’t wait to drink again, and asks if Danni is going to “pump and dump.” Danni is surprised the alcohol is absorbed into the milk (really?), and asks if it won’t help the baby sleep. Cameran is waiting for her hormones to kick in, calling herself a cold-hearted bitch. She thinks she was looking at motherhood the wrong way, and we flash back to her talking to a therapist about not wanting children. She says giving up something doesn’t mean life ends; it’s just a different life. Danni says, it enhances it. Danni thinks Cameran and Leva should make an arranged marriage for the kids.

Chelsea visits her dad Ken. They’re going to do some fishing and drink beer. Her parents divorced when she was three, but remained close friends. Her dad moved to Atlanta, and every other weekend they met at the Hooters in Augusta. They were known by name there. Ken says he got her a present, and that makes her nervous. It’s tequila, so everything is good. She says she loves her mom, but she’s tough. Her dad was always more of a friend than a father figure. She probably tells him more than some of her girlfriends. He asks about Austen, and she says they don’t hang out as much. He taught her to try and remain friends, even if it’s hard, because life too short. Exactly, which is why I think just the opposite. I’ve rarely remained friends with an ex. I’m like Robin Stone from The Love Machine. Movin’ on. She tells Ken that everyone her age is married and has kids, divorced, or remarried. She’s worried she’ll be forty, and still not be in settle-down mode. Ken says not everyone is meant to be married or have kids. Chelsea thinks it would bother him, but he says, not as much as she thinks. He has three kids, so as long as one of them has a kid, he’s good.

Kathryn is hosting a girls’ night at a hotel; she hasn’t had one since she was nineteen. She says girlfriends are a helluva lot better than sh*tty boyfriends. Preach it, sister! Danni asks about lunch with Ashley, and Kathryn says she just wanted to get to know Ashley. Danni thinks she’s being very mature, and Kathryn says she needs to know who’s around her children. Danni calls her the new Kathryn.

Thomas and Ashley have a drink at home. Ashley shows him bachelorette favors called “mug shots,” that have epithets on them. Thomas seems less than thrilled as Ashley holds up Trophy Wife, Gold Digger, and finally, Baby Mama. She says, speaking of which, she left lunch pleasantly surprised. Coming in as the woman Kathryn is threatened by, she was friendly and kind. As the mother of children Thomas’s children, she respects Kathryn. In his interview, Thomas says they strive for cordiality. Thomas is going out for a boys’ night tonight. If this was a musical, his group would merge with Kathryn’s, and they’d dance. Ashley tells Thomas that she gets worried, because – wait for it – he’s a stud. I literally LOL. She says she can’t blame other women for throwing themselves at him. Because it can’t possibly be the money. She says it’s not that she doesn’t trust him, but she doesn’t trust them. In his interview, Thomas says that he moved Ashley there because he was tired of being in meaningless relationships, but he needs a little space. He tells her that he has feelings, and that’s what he tells them. Oh brother.

Kathryn sets out appetizers. The centerpiece is a giant hand with bananas placed on it. Chelsea asks if they’re having condom training. Kathryn says she should take that class. She says the hotel room is bigger than her apartment. The other girls arrive. Naomie says the banana placement is incredible. They talk about Elizabeth, and Naomie says it was shocking to see her walk in with JD. It didn’t make sense. We see a clip of Elizabeth telling Naomie what boils down to, mind your own business. Elizabeth tells her, it’s their relationship. In her interview, Naomie says she understands that Elizabeth is trying to hold it together, but she’ll never be okay with it. She tells the girls that a heads-up text wouldn’t have been nice. Chelsea says let her deal with it now; Naomie learned her lesson.

The guys meet at a bar. Austen wants to reintroduce Craig to the wild. Shep wonders if he has the nuts to make it happen. In his interview, Shep wants to introduce Craig to as many girls as possible. They have a shot.

The girls go out to dinner. Danni wants cheese. They talk about sex like they’re on Sex in the City, and the waiter is highly amused. Kathryn says her vibrator is waterproof. I don’t want to know

Thomas says a sure-fire way to meet women is to cut in while they’re dancing. Austen says Thomas is being unrelentingly Thomas. Craig says they’re from two different eras. What was considered gentlemanly at one time, means you’re a cretin now.  In his interview, Austen thinks Thomas might be from 1932, but his style of game is still better than Craig’s.

Naomie tells the girls that she and Craig got in fight at the shower. Even though they’ve broken up, they still find a way to fight. He sent her a rant at 2:30 am, and said he doesn’t understand why they didn’t work, and they need to talk. Naomie reveals that she’s basically been stalking Craig, following all his social media, and sneaking a tracking app onto his phone. Really? In her interview, Naomie says she has PG Syndrome – Psycho Ex-Girlfriend Syndrome. Who does this? Who admits they do this? She looks him up on her phone, and tells the girls where guys’ night is. Danni wonders if the guys are discussing relationships. Doesn’t one of those girls think what Naomie is doing is weird???

Craig says it’s the most hellish night of his life. In his interview, he says until he’s sure he and Naomie are done, he’s not ready to sleep with anyone else. He doesn’t want to throw away the three years they had. Shep takes Craig up to some women.

The girls have a shot. Kathryn drinks water. Chelsea asks the waiter if there are any good-looking men at the bar. He suggests they come back on the weekend.

While walking to the next bar, Shep asks Austen about having a date with Peyton. He says he had a chance with Peyton, and blew it. At the next place, Shep immediately introduces Craig to some women, but he doesn’t linger.

Craig visits Chelsea at the salon. She tells him that he needs his neck shaved like no one’s business. They talk about having laughs at their respective nights out. Chelsea asks if he was out seeking women or getting past the break-up. He says he’s told Naomie that he needs a definitive answer. Chelsea asks if they can’t have an adult conversation. Craig says Naomie doesn’t like to talk, which I interpret as, she doesn’t like it when she’s wrong. His phone dings. In a totally psychotic psychic move, it’s Naomie, texting that she wants to talk. He says he has new hair. It’s time for them to meet.

Naomie is tired of being mad about anything to do with Craig. Why is she stalking him then? They meet at an outside bar. Craig says they’re so nice when they’re texting, but when they see each other, they fight. He asks if she wants to get back together. He says he would love that, but she says she doesn’t know. She’s not sure the changes they both want to happen, can happen. He says he’s getting a life coach; he wants to be more productive. She says if he’s really going to change his lifestyle and get help, that’s amazing, but she won’t believe it until she sees it. She’s not basing anything on his words; she did that. He says, she’s not even going to try? She says she spent three years clinging to something that wasn’t there. Craig doesn’t know what she’s talking about. He said he was going to finish law school, and he did. He passed the bar in the top 93% percent in the country. Did I hear that right? Does that mean he’s not totally crappy? He tells her that he’s bought property. What is it he’s said he’d do, and didn’t? Naomie tells him, get up in the morning and be a productive member of society. He accuses her of attacking him, and she says she can’t live like he does. He tells her that she focuses on the negative, and accuses her of being a quitter. She says he’s all talk and no action, and he says that’s awful. She says she’s so mad, she wants to cry. Craig says he tried to give her chance. She says he’ll never be accountable for anything. He says he can’t be with her unless she works on her negativity problems.

Naomie says she feels better now about them not being together. She loves him, but he doesn’t get it. Craig thinks she’s angry because she can’t figure a reason they shouldn’t be together. They’re on different planets. Naomie gets up, and walks off. Craig says he guesses that means they’re not getting back together. Very perceptive, our Craig.

Next time, Austen talks to his parents about making his own beer, Thomas invites Kathryn trick-or-treating, and Naomie calls Peyton a thirsty bitch at a Halloween party. I’d thought Naomie was spoiled, but now I’m starting to think she’s batsh*t crazy.

🍹 I’m getting to know the cast on Southern Charm New Orleans, and really enjoying Reagan and Jeff. They have three little dogs (one with one eye like my Casey), along with a Doberman, which is enough, but I’m impressed with their team effort marriage. Because Reagan supported him during his football career (sorry, I didn’t catch the team – football does not stick to my memory), he’s supporting her now, one of her ventures being a jewelry business. I actually love the jewelry, the designs based on her global travels, but I’m sure it’s out of my league pricewise.

🎡 On Watch What Happens Live, they played a new game that was loads of fun. Someone in the booth would give Andy a series of words – for example, Mary Poppins, or shake, rattle, and roll – and he had to use it in a sentence. We also saw the words, but the guests did not. It was amusing to see what he came up with, trying to work it into the conversation. Sometimes he was right on, but he missed a couple of golden opportunities. I hope they do it again. Of course, I said that about their New Year’s Eve show, and they never had another one.

💍 90 Day Fiancé: Happily, Ever After? will be returning on May 20th at 8 pm. I can’t wait! I never did finish writing about last season, but the main takeaway was that Molly was already married to Luis, and never told the producers. This probably would have been fine, except Luis turned out to be an incredibly weird d-bag. He also disappeared. Maybe he met up with Mohammed. Keep watching the headlines.

🚶 Just a Few More Steps…


April 22, 2018 – Madison Meets New People, Quite the Hat, Film Talk & More Than One Random Thought


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


Fear the Walking Dead


Everyone is sleeping like things are normal; like it used to be. Luci makes coffee for Nick, and everybody gets dressed, and ready for the day. All kinds of activities are going on.

Madison asks a little girl about her family, but she doesn’t want to talk. She asks the girl about some of her favorite things instead. Madison says it takes getting used to, but this is home now. She’ll do what she can to make it happen, but needs help. The girl nods. Madison asks where the girl was coming from, and she points. Madison looks out to see zombies wandering around outside the baseball stadium they call home.

Over a loudspeaker, we hear it’s been 365 days. Victor says they’re celebrating, and pours maple syrup over everyone’s breakfast. Madison hammers away at something, and Alicia brings her some food. She tells Madison that they’re leaving in twenty minutes.

The girl talks to Nick about a story that sounds like Faust; a guy selling his soul to the devil. The turnip crop isn’t doing so great, and the girl, whose name is Charlie, asks about food running out. Nick says they’re almost growing enough not to need scavenging.

Madison tells the others where she thinks Charlie is from, but it’s outside the range. Madison says they have to look for her family anyway.

The group gets ready to leave. Nick asks Luci to find Charlie a new book. If she’s reading Faust, hopefully Luci understands to bring back something at a higher reading level than My Little Pony. Luci says Nick should come, but he has a turnip situation. He asks her to make sure Madison comes back this time. Luci tells Madison that Nick has to come out at some point. Madison says he needs to feel safe right now, but he will. Nick finds out it’s weevils causing the crops to fail, and radios the car. They get out of range before he can finish the conversation.

Madison parks, and tells them eyes open, stay close, keep talking. Victor and Luci go through a building that’s been picked clean; even the lightbulbs are gone. Alicia and Madison find a mess and a burned-out car. Madison says it’s lucky Charlie got out alive. Victor realizes the place isn’t just void of survivors, but also the dead. It’s a ghost town without ghosts. (I said that, not him.) Madison sees half-eaten food, and tells Victor that they’ll be there in a minute.

Luci says Madison won’t stop until she looks under every rock. Victor says she wouldn’t stop until she found him. He still hasn’t asked why she helped him after what he did. Luci suggests he does.

Charlie messes with the radio, and Nick tells her it’s okay, they haven’t been gone that long. Charlie knows it’s not a regular run. Nick says if her family is out there, they’ll find them. He asks if she’ll help with the turnips. What is it with turnips? They grow them on The Walking Dead too. Considering my gardening skills lean more toward enthusiasm than actual talent, maybe I should try growing them.

Madison and Alicia look around, but there’s nothing. A woman comes up behind Madison with a gun, and asks for her keys. Madison tells her that she doesn’t have to do this, but the woman keeps a bead on her. Madison signals Victor on the radio. He says, sh*t! and takes off. Madison tells the woman about the settlement. She says they have strong walls, plenty of food, and good people. She says they took in a little girl named Charlie, and asks if the woman knows her, but she says she doesn’t have a kid, and tells Madison to stop. She takes the keys from Madison’s pouch, but runs up against Alicia, with Victor and Luci now behind her. The woman dashes past them. Madison follows.

The woman runs up some steps leading to an oil tank. Alicia asks her to put the gun down, and puts her own down. Alicia tells her to trust them; they’ll give her the car. The woman backs up, and falls into the tank. Lots of falling through roofs going around. It’s dark, and full of oily water. Zombies pop up everywhere. Madison tells Victor to get the hatch open, and jumps down. Victor and Alicia struggle to get it open, but finally do, and oil, water, and zombies flow out. They kill the zombies, and Alicia gets Madison out.

Luci finds a copy of The Little Prince. Well, it’s no Dostoevsky, but better than My Little Pony. Victor wonders why they’re bothering, and Madison says, no one is gone until they’re gone. The woman introduces herself as Naomie. She says she’s sorry; she wasn’t going to hurt her. Madison asks if she has any idea who let the zombies into the tank, but she just got there. Madison asks where she’s from, and Naomie says it’s been a long time since she’s been from anywhere. We hear zombie noises, and Luci says they should leave – now.

Nick burns the turnip crop. A zombie sticks its dead fingers through the fence. Suddenly, music is playing, then fades. Nick wonders if it’s a signal, and he and the others wait to hear it again. There’s just silence, and Nick asks Charlie to open the gate. He gets in a car, takes a deep breath, and rolls out.

Nick remembers being behind a fence, and blowing up the reservoir. Zombies grapple at the car, and Nick runs into something, hitting his head on the dashboard. A sniper from the settlement shoots at the zombies, and radios him to get back. He gets out, and starts walking toward the gate. A zombie starts to come up on him from behind, and in perfect timing, Madison returns and creams it with her car. Luci asks what happened, and Nick says he was out for a stroll. She tells him get in.

Madison wants to talk to Charlie. Charlie says it’s okay; she knows Madison didn’t find them. Madison  tells Charlie that she has to ask another question; not an easy one. What happened at the camp? Who did that? Charlie says nothing, and Madison says they’ll talk later.

Nick gets his wounds dressed by Naomie, who was a nurse, at the ER, then the ICU. Madison doesn’t think it was a surprise to Charlie that they didn’t find her family. Nick leaves, and Naomie says Madison didn’t tell her it was a baseball stadium. Madison says Naomie didn’t believe she had a camp. Naomie asks how many, and Madison says forty-seven; forty-eight if she decides to stay. Naomie says she pulled a gun, but Madison says they’ve all done worse. She thought she’d lost her kids, but found them and found this place. They built it up together. They are who they are because of it. Naomie says they don’t know her. Madison says she doesn’t know them. They’re both taking a chance. She suggests Naomie take a shower, and Naomie is astounded they have one – with hot water.

Victor pushes the car Nick was driving, while another guy steers. Luci radios them to get inside now; ditch the car. They look behind them, where there’s a convoy of large vehicles driving in. They run in, and lock the gate. This doesn’t look good.

A dude rides around on a bicycle, music coming from the boombox on the handlebars. Another guy opens a boxcar, and takes out a ramp. Biking dude leads the zombies up the ramp, and goes out the other side, while the ramp guy locks the zombies in. He puts a flag up that says 12. (In last week’s episode, Al found a flag that said 51, and said she’d seen a lot of those.) A third guy gets out a lawn chair, sits in it, and cracks a beer. Everyone watches. Okay, they have me. I have no clue what’s going on, but obviously these numbers mean something.

Madison walks over to guy sitting down, and asks what he’s doing. He says, having a drink. She asks if there’s a problem, and he says, we’re good, and asks if she wants a drink. She says they have people inside with guns, and he says, that’s a helluva welcome. She tells him that she saw the camp, and the tanks. He asks if she thinks they did that, and she says she saw their flag. He tells her that they had to clean up the mess. The people never thought of what would happen if the bleeder valve got jammed. He warned them, but they didn’t listen. Madison asks what he wants. He wants them to listen. They have a mess of their own. He knows they had a bad batch of turnips, and says to tell Nick to check the other crops; weevils are a bitch to get rid of. Madison asks how he knows Nick’s name. He calls out for Chito, and Charlie walks over.

He tells Charlie, sorry he’s late, but he got her some new records. She smiles, and he tells her to get in the bus. He tells Madison that she’s a good kid. They found her a while back; she has a knack for finding good stuff, and they hit the jackpot here. Madison says they’re not taking anything. He tells her people often say that. They don’t take anything from anyone; not anyone alive anyway. He knows they’re good people, and how many guns they have. He says there’s a natural cycle to a place like this, and they’re due for something to go wrong. They can either give them their stuff and live, or join them. Become one of them, or they wait for them to die, trying to make things work. Either way, he ends up with what he wants. It’s not a threat; it’s the way it goes. He tells Madison that his name is Mel, and holds out his hand. She doesn’t reciprocate, and says they’re not going anywhere. Mel says he’s heard that too. She says they’ve been like them, moving from place to place, and they’re not going back to that life; they’ve found a better way. Mel says they just haven’t been tested yet, but they’re about to be. If she changes her mind, they’ll be waiting. I’m wondering where the women are in this merry band.

Nick toils in the fields. Mel and his friends play more music, country this time. The weevils still rule the turnips. Madison continues to hammer. The others put down their guns, and join her. Takeaway point: Country music makes people do carpentry.

Luci goes out to the bus. Charlie watches from the window as she leaves the book outside. Luci goes back, and joins in on the hammering. Nick remembers working on Jeremiah’s house.


Morgan and John are on their knees, with Madison and her group around them. Morgan says, we’re not who you think we are. Nick rifles through Morgan’s knapsack, and Morgan tells him to help himself. Luci says they must be with them, and holds up the numbered flag. Al asks, who? Victor says, the Vultures. Al has no idea what he’s talking about, and says, if you a-holes would put your guns down, we can help each other. Madison asks who put the flag up, and Al asks what is it to them? Alicia tells Al that she’s going to answer their questions. Al says they found it, and Alicia says show them where.

They get into Al’s truck, and move out.

Next time, Morgan and Nick tussle, Alicia fights zombies, and Morgan says it’s not going to work out how they think. And in case you didn’t know, Naomie is being played by Jenna Elfman.

😸 Ha-Ha!

On Talking Dead, when they say goodbye to those we’ve lost this week, they included Nick’s crop, calling them tur-nopes.

🍸 I barely glanced at The Real Housewives of Potomac, but I did see Robyn trying to have some serious words with Ashley about respect. Ashley was wearing a hat – a fascinator no less – the size of Potomac, and I wondered how Robyn could even keep a straight face, much less discuss anything important. This was during a garden party Gizelle had for a book she was writing (via ghostwriter) about pastor’s wives in the Black church, who are called First Ladies. It’s fiction, but loosely based on her own experiences. I’d definitely read that.

🏯 I was watching a mini-marathon of Abandoned episodes on Viceland this morning (I love that show!), and it led to my leaving the TV on when the original 1980 film of The Shining followed. I’ve never thought it was as good as the book, and thought Jack Nicholson seemed crazy from the jump. I would never let him babysit my hotel over the winter. And Shelley Duvall… well, she was Shelley Duvall. The remake (1997) had more of a sporting chance, since it was a mini-series and had more hours to tell the story. Sadly, although I finally got the topiary animals I wanted to see (Stanley Kubrick couldn’t get them to look right on film in the original, so they were scrapped for the maze), it was somewhat tepid, and lacked the intensity of the original Danny (Danny Lloyd) and Dick Halloran (Scatman Crothers). Which brings me to my point. It was pretty much background noise until Scatman was on the screen. While I love looking at the hotel – sometimes the setting can be one of the stars of the film for me – my favorite scene is when Dick connects telepathically with Danny in the pantry, then explains the shining to him. They just seem so real. That it still captivates me after all these years is a testament to their acting skills. SPOILER – if you’re the one person who hasn’t seen this film. That’s what made it even worse that they killed him off, totally changing the end of the story, where he saves the day. I heard there was supposed to be a third time, again for the big screen. Whether that’s the charm or not, remains to be seen.

🎷🚬 The second episode of Southern Charm New Orleans was on tonight. While Charleston is your upscale country cousin, NOLA is your sultry, mysterious maiden aunt, who never ages, but has a portrait upstairs.

🔌 I saw a commercial for Amazon Echo, and it was a father telling Alexa to announce “ready or not” to his kids during a game of hide-and-seek. How lazy can you get????  Unplug now. Save yourself.

🔮 Danny Learns About His Gift…

🌎 Happy Earth Day! 🌍

April 19, 2018 – Ava Pleads for Avery, Patricia Throws Cameran a Shower, Another Charm, Good-by Summer & Almost


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

In the interrogation room, Ava makes an impassioned plea on camera for Avery’s return. She wonders if she deserved Avery. She says grace is not earned, but a gift, and Avery is a source of grace. If anyone has seen it in the eyes of a child, she begs them to help. She breaks down crying. Sonny sits next to her, and begs in his own way, describing Avery, and saying she’s with her grandfather. He shows them a picture of Mike, and says his father’s memory is fading, and his little girl’s life is just starting. Please help find them.

Drew says every platform Aurora can reach will broadcast it. Ava thanks him, and he says they’ll find them. Sonny tells Ava whatever they feel about each other goes out the window until Avery is found. She wonders if he’s telling her or himself.

Julian tells Kim that Ava must be desperate to cooperate with Sonny. He punched a wall earlier, and Kim says, he must be hurting. He says he needs to be with Ava, but Kim wants to tape his hand first.

Oscar helps Josslyn into the hospital. She insists she just rolled her ankle, and her coach is overreacting. He tells her that she’s super competitive. She says her baby sister being missing is horrible. She hates that they’re treating Mike like a felon, but he could take her somewhere dangerous, and she hates that more. The only time she’s not thinking about everything is when she’s playing. Oscar wishes he could help her, and she says he is.

Franco can’t imagine what Avery’s parents are going through. Elizabeth asks what about him? He says whatever he’s feeling doesn’t compare, but Elizabeth says that doesn’t mean it’s any less valid. He’s glad to be under the same roof with her and her boys, and for a minute, the world was perfect. But the world isn’t perfect, and bad happens all the time. The reality is, that it never stops.

A nurse brings Carly’s follow-up test results to Griff. He looks worried, like always.

Carly tells Sonny the FBI says it doesn’t appear mob related, and Sonny says he already told them that. Griff calls, and tells Carly that he has the test results. He’d like to go over them together. She tells Sonny that she can go over by herself. He says he’ll go home, touch base with Max, and do what he can. She says, don’t worry, but he says that’s not going to happen. Drew offers to take Carly to the hospital, since he’s going there anyway. Ava says she’s not going anywhere until her little girl is back.

Kim suggests Julian take it out on a bag at the gym; she hears Drew is a great coach. Julian thinks he could teach Drew a thing or two he learned on the streets. He suggests she still has feelings for Drew, and he’s single now, but she says she’s right where she wants to be. He thinks he needs more convincing, and she kisses him, but unfortunately has to go to work.

Franco tells Elizabeth that he’s happy about everything, but it’s time to move on and go back to work. She tells him there’s no rush, but he says he’s ready. Instead of going to the art therapy studio, he looks in Betsy’s room.

Elizabeth sees Drew, and tells him she saw the broadcast. He says what good is owning a media company if he can’t help when it’s needed?

Carly tells Griff to give it to her straight. He tells her to sit down, and she says it doesn’t sound good. He’s sorry for the nightmare she’s dealing with, and she says that’s why she wants to get the results out of the way. Griff tells her there’s nothing physically wrong, and she’s pretty sure she told him that. He’d like her to schedule an appointment with Doc. He wants to rule out every possibility as a cause for the incidents she’s described. She insists they’re real, and he just confirmed that there’s nothing physically wrong. She says there’s nothing left to discuss, and thanks him.

Chase and Dante arrive at Sonny’s. Sonny asks if there are any leads, but Dante says nothing yet. Chase asks Sonny to have Carly call him to follow up on the cemetery and parking garage. Sonny doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

Ava looks at pictures of Avery. She swears to find her, and not let anyone take her away again. Julian arrives, and asks how she’s holding up. She says she’s a wreck. He tells her that she did good on TV. He gives her an empty coffee cup (sigh – not only that, they never act like it’s hot either), and she hugs him.

Elizabeth asks Drew if he’s friends with Carly again, and he says they’ve put their differences aside. Elizabeth says they could all use some coming together after surviving the earthquake. He asks about Jake, and she says it helps having Franco back home. He asks how Franco is doing, and she says, okay. He’s back in the art therapy room.

Franco goes into Betsy’s room. He tells her not to talk; every word is a lie. He can’t understand, and doesn’t want to. How could she choose her boyfriend over her sons? She turned blind eye, and allowed it to happen over and over; she didn’t care about them. Betsy says she sent Drew away to keep him safe, and Franco says, to keep her secret safe. She sent him to an orphanage, and made it easy for Jim. When Jim was done, he moved on. Franco has a list of names; people she could have helped if she’d spoken up. He thought it was his fault. Her lies made him doubt and hate himself. Is she happy about that? Is she proud of her little boy now?

Betsy says she doesn’t blame him for hating her, but it can’t be more than hates herself. Franco says she’s just as much a victim as the rest of them. Jim would have killed him if she hadn’t told Drew the truth. He tells her that Jim can’t hurt them anymore; they’re safe. Everything he did died with him. Franco is only fantasizing, and stands in front of Betsy’s bed, watching her sleep. He kneels by her bedside, and hesitantly touches her hair.

Drew is happy that Franco is conquering his demons. Elizabeth says it shouldn’t have happened. She doesn’t get how Betsy let Jim in and didn’t protect her boys from the onset. Drew says Jim was a manipulator, and she was fragile. She didn’t know what was going on. Elizabeth thinks she must have sensed it, and the child comes first. How could she be so complacent? Drew says Elizabeth is a  good mom, but that’s not always the case. She says she might be a good mom, but she’s being a bad employee, and goes back to work.

Drew sees Kim, who says she’s been worried. Oscar was upset about the shooting, but doing fine. Oscar is proud of him for saving Franco, and thinks he’s a hero. Drew says that’s not the case, but Kim says try telling that to his son.

Josslyn wonders what’s taking so long. Oscar says he could text his mom, but Josslyn says she could text her grandmother – the chief of staff. Oscar admits her connection is better than his. He guesses it helps to be related to half the town. She says, he is too, but he tells her that they’re just getting to know him. Her relatives would crawl over glass for her. She asks if he’s calling her spoiled, and he says, privileged. Spoiled kids are entitled, and think they deserve better; that they deserve everything. She’s not like that. She says she loves being first, but he says she works for it. She’s lucky, smart, strong, beautiful, and rich, but she doesn’t think she’s superior. She goes out of her way to help people, and stand up for outsiders. He compares her to Wonder Woman. She has all these special gifts, but uses them for good. She wishes she was Wonder Woman. She would use her superpowers to find Avery and Mike.

Julian tells Ava that he’s sure Avery is safe with Mike. She’s concerned that a rival family might have taken advantage. The Feds said that wasn’t the case, but what if they were snatched in a vendetta against Sonny? It’s clear Sonny is genuinely concerned; she’s not questioning that, but wonders if he’s feeling guilty because he believes his business practices were involved. Julian thinks she should ask herself the same question. What if Avery was taken because of her past – or his? Just because they left that world, doesn’t mean their enemies forgot. She’s tried to put it behind her, but what if the past is catching up, and she’s paying the price? Ava starts to leave, but runs into Griff at the door. She says she’s worked so hard to overcome the past, but what if it’s catching up? What if Avery was taken by one of her enemies?

When Carly gets back home, Sonny says Chase was telling him an interesting story that starts in a parking lot and ends in a cemetery. Dante says it sounds like a horror movie, but he’s not familiar with it. He leaves, and Sonny says since Carly didn’t want to tell him, he had to find out from a cop that the reason she didn’t meet up with Avery and Mike is that she was searching for ghost. She tells him to stop acting like she abandoned them. She called Pilar. Sonny says if she’d been there, they wouldn’t be missing. She says what if someone was reaching about Morgan? Chase must have forgotten to tell him the part about the note. He says Chase told him that nothing was written on the flyer. She says she saw it, and smelled Morgan’s cologne at the grave. Sonny wants to believe her with all his heart. He asks her what Griff said.

Griff tells Ava it’s not her fault, but she says, what if it is? Julian says he might have planted that idea when he threw out the possibility. Ava says she did consider it; she just didn’t say it. Julian says as usual, he did more harm than good. He starts to leave, but Griff says his sister needs him. Griff got another doctor to cover his shift; his place is with Ava. She says she can’t sit doing nothing, and he suggests they pray.

Josslyn asks Oscar if he’s sure he wants a family; he’s had a firsthand look at the downside. He says when there’s more to love, there’s more to lose, but it’s worth it in the end. It was just him and his mom for a long time. Now his dad is in the picture, and who knows, maybe more than that. She asks what he means, and Oscar says his mom finally admitted she still has feelings for him.

Drew tells Kim that sons look up to their fathers, but it’s probably best if Oscar looks at him like a regular guy. Kim says Drew can break the news to him. Oscar misses him. He suggests the go out for a burger, but she says he should come over this week, and she’ll make her famous chili. Back in the day, she told him it was homemade, but she really just opened a can. He calls her a chili imposter, and she says her culinary skills have improved; she can make it from scratch now. He tells her that he did take something away from the experience. Not everyone gets the best of parents. He was just talking to Elizabeth about what makes a great mom. He says Kim is a great mom, and raised a great kid. He thanks her for that.

Elizabeth finds Franco sitting on the floor in an office. He says he didn’t make it to art therapy. He saw Betsy instead. His intention was to dump all of his pent-up rage on her, and blame her for every terrible thing. But he looked at her, all helpless, and couldn’t do it. He didn’t have the heart. Elizabeth says she never understood that expression. It doesn’t apply. He has a complicated, contradictory, compassionate heart. He has every reason to unload on his mom. That he didn’t, proves who he is inside. He’s kind, forgiving, and strong. He needs to heal, and she’s there to help as much as he’ll let her. He says if he makes it at all, it will be because of her. She sits on the floor, in his arms.

Franco says he has the list. Elizabeth asks if he knows what he’s doing with it. He says he’d like to make contact, if he can find the courage. Elizabeth thinks he’ll find a way, and not only help them, but help himself.

Kim tells Drew not to thank her for loving Oscar. He’s the joy of her life, and she’s grateful for him. Drew says he’s a lucky kid, which makes him a lucky dad. She thinks they should try to spend more time together. Maybe all three of them. They are a family. Drew says it’s a deal.

Ava thinks prayers would be more effective from Griff alone, but he says anyone can pray. Julian says, why not? It can’t hurt. Griff takes their hands, and they form a prayer circle.

At the station, Chase asks Dante what’s unclear about it being a hot line, not a support line? He hopes Dante has more luck. Dante suddenly says he thinks he knows where Mike took Avery.

Carly tells Sonny the test results were negative. There’s nothing physically wrong with her. He says that’s good news, but she says, not really. Since he thinks she’s losing her mind.

Tomorrow, Dante doesn’t want to get anyone’s hopes up, Lulu says Henrik replied to her, and Robert wants to know what Anna isn’t telling him.

Southern Charm

Thomas says at long last he has a real woman with a real woman’s heart. Then asks Ashley to make breakfast.

Cameran calls Patricia. She’s feeling large and not in charge. Patricia vaguely remembers, and wasn’t enthusiastic about repeating the process. She wants to do a co-ed baby shower-slash-party. Cameran says she’ll get a list, but Patricia says it should be her call, since she’s giving the party. Clearly, for all her talk about etiquette, Patricia doesn’t know how a shower works. In her interview, Cameran is afraid she’s going to leave Kathryn off the guest list. Patricia tells her to just show up.

Kathryn has the kids. She says they spend a lot of time bonding. Saint was taken from her at six months and it hurt, but it took going to rehab for her to get her priorities straight. The kids mess with Play-Doh, my nemesis. Probably yours too, if you’ve ever tried to get it out of the treads of your shoe. Kathryn says it’s hard. Even though she’s moving toward joint custody, it’s heartbreak every other weekend. It’s been a long journey, but things are settling into place and moving in the right direction. She says it feels like chapter three.

Thomas makes eggs. In his interview, he jokes about mixing in Plan-B just in case, once more confirming what a creeper he is. He asks if Ashley has ever had a pregnancy scare. She says she’s had what if thoughts. She has a fertility app on her phone, and can see when the window is. It’s the birth control she’s using. Oh Lord, no comment. She says, if it happens, it would be a blessing, but she doesn’t want to be a single parent. She tells him that a baby makes a good relationship great, and a bad relationship worse. Thomas says he could have written that. That’s if he could write. In his interview, he says Ashley would be a wonderful mother, but he wants to know more about her. He cares too much about himself (key word) and his kids to make a wrong decision. They get busy, because no wrong decision can be made using basically no birth control at all. He says, fade to black, which I would find funny if he didn’t make me so ill. However, he is not as bad as Jax. No one is as bad as Jax.

Kathy, the childbirth educator, visits Cameran. Cameran hasn’t been to any classes or read What to Expect. Whitney is pinch-hitting for her husband. Kathy tells her to visualize the perfect experience, and Cameran says she’d pick her baby off a tree. She’s concerned about her vagina being all messed up, and still ending up needing a C-section. Up until now, she’s had control of all aspects of her life, and she’s been in denial. Obviously, if her first childbirth class is five minutes before delivery. Whitney asks if she’ll get an epindurmal [sic], and says he’d need an Elvis dose. Kathy wants Cameran to learn squatting for a certain amount of time. In her interview, Cameran says when she finds herself overwhelmed, she tells herself that cavewomen did this with nothing. If they can do it, she can. They go though some other conditioning exercises. Like the catching-the-baby-like-a-football move.

Kathy leaves, and they talk about the shower. Whitney says the theme is super chic, waspy leisurewear from the 60s. Cameran tells him to tell Patricia that she wants to include everyone. Whitney doubts she’ll want Kathryn in the house, but everyone else is welcome.

Austen meets Craig at an outside bar. Austen is friends with all the bartenders because of the business he’s in; it’s like being low-key famous. Austen asks if Craig is cool with checking out babes and not feeling guilty. He’s single, and it might take a minute to regroup. Craig thinks life would be easier if he was gay, and Austen asks if Craig needs to tell him something. Shep joins them. He asks if they’ve recovered for the party, and says he didn’t remember the end. He was browned out. They get some magnificent looking nachos.

Craig says at the end of the party, he got the nice Naomie, not the mean one. Austen says they clearly still care about each other, but if they talk every day, they’ll never get over it. In his interview, Craig says Naomie going back and forth is a mind-f*ck. Shep says he’s rooting for Craig.

Chelsea joins Cameran for her ultrasound. In her interview, Chelsea says she’s known Cameran through every stage of her life, and it’s been fun. Cameran says it’s freaky to see your stomach move when it’s not gas. I think it would be freaky to see my stomach move even if it was gas. Since she’s about ready to pop, you can see the entire baby in detail. Cameran says she hasn’t cried yet, and Chelsea starts to cry. In her interview, Cameran says she thinks it hasn’t hit her yet. She’s not going to believe it until she sees it. She tells Baby Palmer that she loves her, and will see her soon.

Chelsea thinks she and Austen are in a good place. She backed up when he started dating, but it’s better now. Cameran thinks he’s still attracted to her. She asks if they still smooch, but that’s a no. Chelsea says her problem isn’t him, but his lifestyle. He parties all night, and sleeps all day. She can’t be with someone like that, and wonders what it is with this town and the men.

Austen says his fun employment period won’t last forever. He has nothing to fall back on, and is feeling the pressure, hearing his mother’s voice in his head. He wants to stay in the beer industry, but was nervous that his passion would be killed once it became the daily grind. He talks to a bartender about one of their beers. In his interview, he says he’s tired of peddling someone else’s wares. It’s time for him to do his own thing, but he has to figure out what it is.

Thomas calls his dad. He’s almost 91, and doing great. Thomas says he’s quick as a lark, mixing his similes. They discuss a table that Thomas wants. Arthur grew up during the Depression, and Thomas is afraid to tell him what he spends on anything. Arthur tells him Ashley is too nice for him. He wants Thomas to have a country girl even though Thomas’s mother was from San Francisco. Arthur says he trained her, and Thomas wants his notes.

Kathryn visits Craig. In his interview, Craig says they’ve always connected on some strange level. She’s brings him a spice set as a housewarming gift, and he shows her around his new place. In his interview, he says he and Kathryn don’t judge; it’s kind of a safe place. He shows her some things he’s sewn and embroidered. All he took was the sewing machine, and he needed an outlet. Now he can make his pillows as much as he wants without criticism. He asks if she’s going to Cameran’s shower, but she says no. In her interview, she says would have been surprised if she’d been invited.

Craig asks what she thinks about Thomas and Ashley. Kathryn feels badly for Thomas, and thinks he’s being played. Craig thinks Ashley is a hopeless romantic, but Kathryn doesn’t buy it. She tells Craig when they were in New York, she and Thomas hooked up, and he tried to tell her that he wanted another baby. Craig says at least she didn’t get pregnant this time.

Patricia’s theory of having a party is to use things you already have. She explains that Slim Aarons is the theme. He’s a famous photographer who chronicled social life in Palm Beach in the 60s. She tells the caterer that the spread is amazing, and it is.

Chelsea asks her cute Pittie dog which dress he likes. Craig works on some last-minute sewing. Naomie’s roommate Wilton is also her gay bey. They have champagne while getting ready. They talk about Cameran still looking skinny and beautiful. Naomie tells Wilton that Kathryn isn’t coming because the guest list was up to Patricia.

Omg, that house. Chelsea arrives first, and says it looks awesome; Patricia doesn’t skip the detail. I love Whitney’s paisley sportscoat. He thinks it looks a bit Thurston Howell III. I don’t remember him as ever wearing paisley. Maybe an ascot. Chelsea says Austen looks like Easter Sunday on drugs in his flowered jacket. Craig comes bearing pillows. Patricia doesn’t understand why he’s not a lawyer, but if making pillows makes him happy, go for it. We find out that Thomas likes a tiny heinie, which I did not need to know. I gasp when Craig totally misses his mouth with his champagne glass. And the party just started.

Cameran arrives with friend Eddie. She says it’s not a typical baby shower; it’s a typical Patricia baby shower, and beyond fabulous. I’m loving the colors. Cameran says the angel ice sculpture is the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen, but I wouldn’t go that far. Naomie is sad Kathryn isn’t there, and wants to say something. Chelsea thinks all it takes is one time for redemption.

Naomie asks to talk to Patricia in private. She tells Patricia that she respects her feelings about Kathryn, but she’s been spending time with her, and Patricia is like, is that the doorbell? and excuses herself. In her interview, Patricia doesn’t think it’s appropriate to bring grievances and issues to light at someone else’s house. Maybe not, but that was pretty rude, since she made a beeline for the couch, not even pretending to greet a guest. I like Patricia in a lot of ways, but this is not one of them.

Cameran demands cake. It’s a baby in a bathtub. Oh wait, is it coming out of… yes, I believe it is. Cameran loves it, and says that’s why she’s a drop-out debutante. I’m kind of surprised.

Naomie tells Craig that she just had an awkward interaction with Patricia. She respectfully approached her regarding Kathryn, trying to say she was doing better, and Patricia cut her off. Patricia thinks Kathryn is nothing, and that’s what bothers her. Craig says rehab helped Kathryn grow; he thinks they’ve all grown. He tells her that he’s gotten a lot done lately. Somehow, Naomie interprets this as him saying he’s done more in the past two months than in their entire time together, and asks why he thinks that. He says that’s a loaded question, and also an impossibility timewise. She says she’s not a mean person, but she trusted him, and he let her down. Why does she keep rehashing this? He says he’s the same person she traveled the world with. She’s the one who changed, and decided she didn’t agree with his lifestyle. She says she wanted to do something with her life. He sits home and sews, and pretends to do things. He asks what’s wrong with his sewing? He tells her that he owns two homes, so tell him that he’s a big loser at twenty-nine. Geez, I didn’t own a home until I was almost forty, and it’s doubtful I’ll ever own two. He says a year and a half in, she changed. She says she got her sh*t together, unlike him. He says she’s still focused on outward appearance. Putting on my Dr. Phil hat – or bald cap, as it were – the problem is, she wants to change him and that’s not going to happen. He’s not what she wants, and she won’t let it go. Or maybe he is what she wants, and she can’t reconcile it with what she thinks she should want. All I know for sure, is that I’d have him slaving away at that machine, and I’d be wearing custom-made clothing. And probably selling it too.

Cameran opens the gifts. Craig made her some kind of monkey lovey, and she dies laughing. She gets lots of cute stuff, and thanks everyone for their sweet presents.

JD (bleh) comes in with Elizabeth. Naomie is like, wtf? She feels stupid after what Elizabeth said to her, and wonders how Elizabeth can walk in with him and be smiling. Whitney says there’s something there Naomie must not know about. Shep tells her keeping up appearances is important in the South. She doesn’t know how to greet them, and Shep says just say hello, smile, give Elizabeth a hug, and a nod to JD. She does, but gives JD a half-hug. In her interview, Naomie says he was smirking at her like, ha-ha, I’m with her; it’s palpable. She knows he feels like he’s winning. Chelsea says she did her due diligence as a friend; it’s not her fight anymore. Shep and Whitney ditch the conversation.

JD and Elizabeth leave. Elizabeth says, love you guys, and Naomie gives her the finger. HAHAHA!

Next time, Ashley and Kathryn talk, Chelsea is worried she’ll never be in settle down mode, and Naomie says Craig is all talk and no action. For the love of all that’s holy, leave that guy alone already. Peyton

🍹 I caught some of Southern Charm New Orleans, and I think it’s worth a look. It has a very different vibe from Charleston, and I like it. My sister lived in NOLA for many years, and I was always sorry I never had a chance to visit her – for the food and music alone. Unfortunately, she got displaced by Katrina. The city’s history and culture are a contrast to South Carolina, and this group is a little more sophisticated. Confirmation on that remains to be seen, since it was only the first episode. The houses are huge and fabulous, and best of all, there are dogs. Little dogs.

⛵ There was a Summer House reunion, replacing Watch What Happens Live tonight. It was also what I call a cheap reunion, since they used the clubhouse set. It was the same sh*t, different day, with the cast doing nothing but arguing and pointing fingers. Not much of a change from the Housewives reunions, but cramped, and without the ballgowns. Kyle sat through much of it with his mouth hanging open, and the takeaway point was that they know how to party. No. Just no.

🚣 You’re Almost There…