Tag Archives: The Real Housewives of New York City

August 23, 2017 – Winston Takes the Stand, the NYC Reunion Continues, Raw Chicken & Jax

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Elizabeth says she missed being in the studio with Franco, and he says he missed being everywhere with her. He tells her she should paint again, and to consider his studio hers. She says for now she’ll live vicariously, and tells him there’s a reason he’s famous. He says not for the reason he’d like.

Ned sees Alexis at the MetroCourt. He was looking for her because he’s in the market for her legal services.

Julian’s trial starts again. The prosecutor – whose name I still can’t find out, so I’m continuing to call him Will Smith – has an addition to the witness list. Scotty says the prosecutor is playing games, and he’s had no prep time. Will says that he has a witness that can speak to Julian’s motives. Julian wonders who it’s going to be. It’s Winston! Scotty asks how bad it’s going to be.

Sam tells Carly that she shot Sonny. Carly says that the Garvenator bragged to her about it, and Sam says that’s not the whole story. Jason tries to get her to leave, but Sam says she’s not staying silent anymore, and Carly deserves to know what happened.

Elizabeth says that Franco is a powerful artist. He says the purpose of the paintings was for people to feel the darkness. He worries that his talent and the darkness were intrinsically connected, and he won’t be able to create anymore. She says he was literally in a different head space then, but he says he can’t blame everything on the tumor.

Ned tells Alexis that he wants to update his will, adding Olivia-Q and Leo. Alexis calls Leo his stepson, but he says that he hasn’t been able to adopt Leo yet.

Wow. Winston is the same actor, but looks younger; maybe because he lost weight. Scotty doesn’t understand how he can speak about anyone else’s motives. Will says he was there during many of their conversations, and his testimony is vital. The judge allows it. Will asks when he first met Olivia-J. Winston talks about her having him opening the store. All he knew was that she had unfinished business in Port Charles, and her brother was involved and willing to do whatever she needed.

Carly says Garvezilla told her that he killed Sonny. How could Sam have shot him? Sam says she collapsed afterward. She woke up in the hospital, and didn’t remember anything. Then she started to remember, and she’s sooo sorry. Carly grasps that it’s real, and Sonny confirms that it’s true. Sam says she didn’t know what was real or wasn’t anymore. Her hallucinations were like a walking nightmare, with Sonny telling her that he was going to take her family away. Sam tells Carly that it sounds crazy, but she was so scared and would have done anything. Carly realizes this is what Sam wanted to tell her at the hospital. Sam says it makes her nauseous to know how far it went. She bought a black-market gun, and staked out his house, following him to the site.

Elizabeth tells Franco that she loves their world. Franco says that he does too, and it scares him. He tells Elizabeth that she thrills and calms him at the same time, and he loves her. He says she’s probably the first sane woman he’s been with, and the first normal person to love him. He doesn’t deserve her. He loves the world they’ve created, but is terrified he’ll mess it up. Elizabeth tells him that he won’t, but he says she doesn’t know that. She says that everyone has darkness inside, but there’s also light. She understands the paintings have brought up bad memories, but there’s one in particular that she wants to know about. She pulls out the painting she’d been looking at. Two boys side-by-side, looking down a road.

Alexis tells Ned that she’s not representing him in a custody case. Ned says this must mean she thinks Julian might get off. He thought she’d have the best chance of getting Julian to agree to an adoption. She says that she wouldn’t go anywhere near it for a million different reasons. He asks her if one of those reasons is that she’s still hung up on Julian.

Winston says he ran the pawn shop and carried out Olivia-J’s orders. Will Smith asks if he was present at Olivia and Julian’s first meeting. When he says that he wasn’t, Will asks when was the first occasion they met? Winston says that Julian came by to lay out future plans and how best to achieve them. but he wasn’t privy to everything. He says they spoke in conspiratorial tones, and when Julian left, Olivia told him what he was to do. Scotty is like, he wasn’t present, what is up with this? Will reads off something about Alexis meeting with Julian when Winston was there, and Julian saying he was just a friend.

Jason says that Sam doesn’t have to do this. She says she does. She says that Sonny was amazing and sympathetic. He tried to talk her down, saying he’d never do anything to hurt her. Carly is like, of course he wouldn’t, and I wonder if she forgot Sam was sick. She answers my question by saying that she gets Sam was sick, but she’s trying to understand everything. Sam talks about Sonny walking toward her, and how he tried to take the gun, but it went off. Carly says it was an accident then, but Sam says she meant to shoot him and she did.

Will Smith asks Winston what he and Julian discussed. Winston says that Julian was pleased that Morgan was killed, and was looking forward to helping Olivia-J. Will asks what the plan was, but Winston didn’t know. He says Julian seemed to be a willing participant. No surprise Scotty objects, since it’s total conjecture, and it’s sustained. Winston says that Julian was concerned about legal ramifications, and wanted to help, but not get caught. They agreed to say he was coerced, but he was a willing accomplice.

Alexis tells Ned that she knows how she feels, but doesn’t know which feeling wins out. She asks what’s wrong with her. Ned says she’s beautiful, smart, and complicated, and way too good for Julian. She agrees, but loves him, and can’t let go. She wonders why she picks men who are bad for her, and dangerous. She says Ned is the only one who didn’t fit the mold, and she ran from him, but if she had it to do over, she’d do it differently. Ned tells her she wouldn’t, and she says he’s right. He says she knows the answer, and Alexis says they’re all like her father, and her father didn’t love her. Ned says maybe it’s time to break the pattern.

Elizabeth tells Franco that the painting stands out from the others. The energy is lighter, and hopeful. Ava texts Franco, and he says he gets to show his work at the gallery. He’ll be killing two birds with one stone; getting rid of the stuff, and making money. Elizabeth asks what he’s going to do with it, and he says that he wants to help her with the groceries, mortgage, and sexy stuff. She tells him that he makes everything sexy, and when he adds helping Kiki, she says it’s getting sexier by the minute. Franco wonders what if the art doesn’t sell, and Elizabeth says it will, especially the painting she likes. He tells her that one’s not for sale.

Sam tells Carly that a lot of it is a blur, but Sonny is clear. He put his hand on hers to stop her, and she deliberately pulled the trigger. Sonny says that it wasn’t her, and to stop apologizing. She says he did nothing to defend herself, but she had to finish it. Sonny didn’t fall into the hole; she kicked him in, and thought he was dead. She tells Sonny that she left him there to die, and is sooo sorry. He calls her over to him, and says it wasn’t her fault. She had an infection, and it wasn’t her. She has nothing to be sorry about. Carly looks pissed.

Winston says he was just there to facilitate things as the driver/delivery person. Will Smith asks if he was aware she was unstable, and alludes that Julian was. Scotty’s objection is sustained. Will asks if Winston was there around the time of the hospital bombing, and he says that Julian told Olivia to make it look like he’d been tied up, so he could deny accountability.

Scotty says this is the definition of hearsay, and there’s nothing to back it up. The judge tells Will to ask a question or excuse the witness. He asks Winston about Julian trying to kill Olivia, and asks why he would do anything for her if he wanted her dead. Will tells Winston to speculate, and Scotty is like, ha! Winston says Olivia told him that Julian felt guilty, and would do anything in his power to make it right.

Franco tells Elizabeth that he’s keeping that painting. She asks why it’s special, and talks about the counterpoint in the picture. Franco thinks her talking about art is hot. She asks if the mirror effect is significant. Franco explains that when he was little, he had an imaginary friend who lived in an imaginary world that mirrored his. He outgrew it, but missed his friend, so he did the painting with each of them in their respective opposite realities. He says it was the last nice thing painted; a manifestation of his childhood psychosis.

Sonny tells Sam to stop blaming herself for something she couldn’t control. She does the “what if” thing, and he asks if he or Morgan were responsible for things they did when they were sick. Sam says no, and Jason says to blame him. She was sick and not herself, and he did nothing. He should have realized it was serious and made her go to the doctor. Sonny says that he didn’t expect it, but Jason says he should have been paying attention. Sam says she was hiding, but doesn’t know why, because she trusts him most of all. She wonders why she didn’t she ask him for help.

Alexis tells Ned that Julian’s proclamation of love made her head spin. He means it, but the other side of him can’t help it; he was born into it. She knows she’s making excuses, and Ned thanks her for not making him say it. She says he’ll hurt her again, but when it’s happening to you, and you’re in love with them, and they’ve made you happier than you’ve ever been, the thought of saying that it can’t work out is impossible. She wants off the roller coaster. She wants it to end, and has to figure out how to make that happen. I dunno. Kill him?

Scotty asks why Winston’s visit upset Julian. When Winston says that he can’t speak for Julian’s state of mind, Scotty wonders why, since he’s speaking for everyone else’s. Will Smith objects, saying it’s hearsay, but Winston says maybe Julian wasn’t feeling well. Scotty asks if Olivia wouldn’t have known that, since Winston was following him and she was bugging his phone. Winston says she didn’t tell him everything, and Scotty says that he wasn’t always in the loop then.

Scotty asks Winston how jail is, and suggests that he might get better accommodations for his testimony. He asks if Winston is trying to save hide, but Winston pretends to be noble, saying that he wanted to make things right for everyone who suffered at Olivia and Julian’s hands. Julian jumps up and yells liar! and it gets loud in the courtroom.

Elizabeth says that to escape the loneliness, Franco made someone up who would understand him. He tells her that she’s special, and she says that she feels the same way about him. He doesn’t want to lose her, and she says, then don’t.

Sonny tells Sam that losing your mind is terrifying. Telling someone makes it real, so you make them your enemy. He talks about how he would cover until the dam broke, and he couldn’t take anymore. He tells her that she’s not like him; it was something temporary. Sam worries that it unleashed something in her. Sonny asks if she feels the same way now, and she says no. Jason tells her to trust herself. Sonny says it’s over, but Carly says not as long as the police are investigating.

Elizabeth asks Franco if there’s something he’s not telling her about the painting. At first he says no, but then says that maybe about the subject matter. When he imagined the friend, he imagined him being helpful. Like when Franco couldn’t tie his shoes, the friend learned and helped him. He has a real memory of being on merry go round, and not knowing how to get off, but his friend jumped off first, and he followed. He wants the picture as a reminder, but tells Elizabeth not to worry; he doesn’t have an imaginary friend now. She says that it makes total sense, and now that she understands, she loves it even more – and loves him. They kiss.

Alexis wonders if there’s a support group for her problem. Ned thinks there is, but she says AA is all she can handle. Ned offers to be sounding board. Alexis says that she wants to like someone sane, safe and gentle, but can’t get out of her own way. Ned says, so far, but she’s fiercely intelligent, and if anyone can break the cycle, it’s her.

The courtroom is out of control. The judge tells Scotty to calm his client down, or there’s going to be some contempt handed out. Julian threatens Winston, and the prosecution rests.

Carly asks Sonny if he knew all along, and he tells her he did. Jason admits to covering for them, and says that he and Sonny decided to protect her. Carly gets it that Sam is sick, and that the last thing she needed was being hounded by the police. What she doesn’t get, is why they didn’t tell her. Sonny says the situation was volatile. Carly tells him everything always is, and after twenty years, how can he keep something like that from her?

Tomorrow, Lucy asks Finn about the house, Julian wants to take the stand, and Carly asks Sonny when trusting each other changed.

The Real Housewives of New York City – Reunion Part Two

Andy asks how LuAnn feels about Tom seeing Missy. She insists he sees her at parties because Ramona brings her, but Ramona says that’s not true. LuAnn reminds us that Ramona’s husband was in a full-blown affair, and Bethenny says it’s not the bar by which they should set their relationships. Andy asks LuAnn why they’re together, and LuAnn makes noises about how they live. Bethenny says you can make a lifestyle out of a life, but not a life out of a lifestyle. LuAnn says she loves being married, and blah-blah-blah, the same stuff we’ve heard a million times. She talks about her penthouse, and Bethenny says that’s pretentious AF, since it’s really just a one-bedroom on the top floor. Andy remarks on how happy everyone is. Really, Andy?

It’s Tinsley’s turn in the hot seat. We flash back to her arrival at Sonja’s, and her explanation of the arrest. (Tinsley Mortimer, google it.) There’s a clip of Carole reading to her from Page Six about her comeback. And more clips about her relationship. The montage ends with her meeting Scott, and Carole saying she sees a pink dress in her future. A viewer asks why she still has the same look, neighborhood, and activities, and she says she didn’t want to reinvent herself, but get her life back and be herself again. Carole talks about how funny and genuine she is, and says although they’re polar opposites, they connected. Tinsley is still at the hotel, and talks about how cool her room is. Bethenny asks if she and Scott are moving in together, and she says in the fall. She thinks he’s “the one.” Good for her. He seems like a nice guy, and more geared to her than someone named Topper. Andy asks if she’s in a better place now. Again, really, Andy? Tinsley tells them about how she kept going back to her abusive relationship. Dorinda asks why she didn’t ask her mother for help, and she says she hid a lot of things. There was also a lot of drinking going on, and she carried it into the season as a crutch.

A viewer asks if she uses humor to make light of her drinking, and if she has a problem. Tinsley’s non-drinking problem is discussed. Andy asks if she was drinking first thing in the morning in Mexico, which isn’t really a fair question, since that was a vacation that revolved around liquor. LuAnn says that Tinsley can out drink her (holy!), and Tinsley says she’s amazed at how she can put it away. Bethenny says it’s doubtful she’d be in a six-month relationship with Scott if there was a problem, and I agree. I think this one just likes to party. And why not?

Carole is next. We flash back to Carole being positive that Hillary would win the election, and how very informed on politics she is. Obviously not informed enough to make a correct prediction. We see her insulting Ramona, and her emotions taking a nosedive on election night, and there’s a clip from the Women’s March. We move on to her shacking up with Adam, and how that goes downhill pretty quickly, and he moves back out. Andy asks what’s going on with them now. Carole says he was in-between apartments when he lived with her, but they’ve decided to take a break and give each other some space. She likes feeling free. She’s not seeing other people; she’s focusing on the me-centric parts of her life. Andy asks how she’d feel if Adam was seeing other people, and it doesn’t seem like she cares a whole lot.

Andy asks Bethenny if the election was the most irritated she’s been at Carol, but she says no. Bethenny thinks we need dialogue, not badgering. Carole talks about how no one appreciated her election expertise, and Ramona says she felt like she couldn’t even talk to her. Andy asks who knows either candidate and who voted for who. Ramona says she met them both, but pleads the fifth about voting. Dorinda brings up the picture that Sonja has of her and Donald, and Sonja says she used to consult with him about hotels. Dorinda says Hillary has been to her home. Luann knows no one. Bethenny told Bill Clinton that he had spinach in his teeth at Barney’s. She also told a funny story about doing the walk of shame literally into Donald, who recognized her and decided to introduce her to whoever he was with. She said she probably still reeked of the night before’s liquor. Yep. That’s always when things like that happen. She says she didn’t like the election whatsoever or her choices, and I’m with her. Tinsley is good friends with Ivanka, but claimed that she wasn’t in the state where she was registered, and couldn’t vote. Okay. It sounded like she didn’t really care, saying it wasn’t her thing, almost giving Carole apoplexy. I hate that. Yes, it’s your right to vote, but then shouldn’t it also be your right not to vote? Just sayin’.  Oddly enough, this political discussion is one of the few times no one argued.

Sonja juggling Frenchie and Rocco is brought to the table, and we flash back to both of them. I love Sonja saying that she’s between a Rocco and a hard place, and we see how Frenchie moved in. Andy asks what the status is. She’d originally thought of Frenchie for Tinsley, but he had eyes for her, and they’re still seeing each other. Carole heard he was “cast” as Sonja’s boyfriend. Sonja is like, what? and says he was staying with her all the time anyway, so she suggested he live with her when he’s not in France. She likes getting it. Thanks for the visual. She says they went to Paris when they finished filming, and she met his parents. Dorinda thinks it’s a mistake to have someone move in so quickly. Andy asks how Rocco feels, and Dorinda says they’re good friends. Why is she suddenly answering for Sonja? Bethenny thinks it’s genius, and Sonja says the long game wins. She wants someone who’s really there for her, and says Rocco is a good person. She’s not giving him up, and they’ll see. She thinks Frenchie might eventually want children even though he says he’d give it up to marry her. She wants someone to grow old with, and thinks someone like Rocco would fulfill that need. Bethenny thinks she should give him the old bang down one-two and check it out, since Sonja has never slept with him.

Bethenny’s divorce is the next topic. We flash back to suckerfish Jason Hoppy making her life a living hell, even after the divorce was finalized. What a creep that guy is. Andy asks what’s the latest on her love life, and Bethenny says she’s with Dennis. She says things needed to be dealt with, and she’s in a better place to make a sane decision. She says she has a difficult time letting people get close, but she had ended the relationship due to the circumstances of their divorces. She says she’s freer and happier now, and Dennis has dealt with his own issues. A viewer says she should consider I gotta go as her next tagline, and we flash back to her jetting early from events. She says she mostly removed herself from arguments, and if she doesn’t like how someone is speaking to her, she’s gotta go. Andy brings up suckerfish Jason’s latest stalking charges, and Ramona reminds Bethenny about how she’ll never be rid of this slimebucket because they have a child together. Bethenny flat-out doesn’t want to discuss it with her. She says it’s been a negative, inexplicable situation that’s hopefully getting better now. Andy milks the topic some more, and Bethenny says it cost her $3 million in legal fees. He asks about Brynn, and Bethenny says she doesn’t understand at her age. She’s isolated in her life and happy. Carole adds that Bethenny has never said anything negative about Jason to her daughter, unlike the crap Jason has pulled on her. Bethenny says by the time Brynn is old enough to be aware, a new story will have eclipsed hers. She doubts she’ll be relevant by the time Brynn is googling things. Carole says by then she’ll have a sense of the dynamic. Bethenny says life isn’t fairytales and rainbows.

Andy brings up Bethenny talking to her mother for the first time in years, and if she’s had contact. Bethenny says that her mother talking to the press was the problem in the first place, and when she was getting ready to visit Florida, her mother told a magazine negative things. Andy wonders if stress affects how Bethenny interacts with others, because he’s the king of idiotic queries. Bethenny says they can’t imagine the torment this has been, and if she lets it out, she’ll break down. Ramona talks about Mario trying to force his way into her life when they’d started filming after the divorce, and how awful it was. Carole says she saw how Jason interfered with Bethenny’s relationships, and Bethenny didn’t even realize how the emotions wreaked havoc in her life. Bethenny says it’s impossible to explain and it’s torture. She starts to cry, and Andy asks if the ladies knew what was going on. LuAnn says only from the papers. Carole says he’s obsessed with her, and LuAnn wonders where his anger is coming from. My guess is from that sleazebag suckerfish losing his meal ticket and not being able to face reality. Andy asks if LuAnn understands Bethenny’s breakdown in the Berkshires now, but LuAnn says she understood it then. Andy asks if there’s a resolution, and Bethenny says any resolution is court mandated. She has faith that somehow, she’ll have a normal, free life, but it won’t happen unless there’s zero contact. Ramona talks about how important it is to teach their daughters independence, and it’s the first rational thing that’s come out of her mouth in maybe ever. Dorinda says you need to have options, and you can’t afford to lose them financially or emotionally. Bethenny says it’s important not to have a man be your identity. Andy asks when Bethenny is at her happiest, and she says being with her daughter and doing simple things. She thanks everyone for being respectful, and says that was fun.

Next time, the reunion concludes, Ramona is front and center, and Tinsley argues with Sonja.

🍄 I missed the first hour of the two-hour MasterChef, but caught the second half. There was a chicken and potato challenge with teams of two – there are ten cooks remaining. Dino and Jeff knocked it out of the park, and I thought Christina was going to leap across the stage and grab the chicken out of Aaron’s hand. Caitlin and Adam tried some kind of Japanese fusion thing without tasting all of the elements together, and it was a bust. Gordon said they had brilliant moments, but this wasn’t one of them, and most of his critique was bleeped out. Eboni and Cate were the winners and their recipe will be in Family Circle magazine. Cool! Yachecia escaped a third pressure test, and Adam and Caitlin ended up on the chipping block after Gordon played with them, at first acting like they were safe. It was mean, but I laughed. They had to replicate Gordon’s signature chicken dish, Chicken Supreme. Adam’s chicken was raw. The cardinal sin of cooking. Gordon rubbed it in by saying it’s the best dish he’s cooked in the competition – other than the chicken being raw. You’ll never have to worry about raw chicken with me, since I cook the crap out of it.  Adam cried, Caitlin cried, the balcony cried. Christina tried to make him feel better by talking to him about the rest of the dish, and how fabulous it was, acting like Gordon didn’t just go, oh dear, a million times. I’m no expert, but even I knew what a grievous error this was. Although there was a group of girls in my Home Ec class who failed to get Jell-O to set overnight, which might top that. Gordon said the big loser knew who they were, and Adam took his apron off. For a moment, he hesitated, and I thought we might all have to stay in for recess. Next time, there’s a tag team challenge, and everyone, including the judges, looks like they have a headache.

🐓 I checked out Jax and Brittany Take Kentucky. The look on LVP’s face when Jax told her that he’s working on the farm made it worth watching, but not much else. She suggested he was good at stirring the sh*t, but didn’t know about him shoveling it. It was okay. Since this is just a filler until the next season of Vanderpump Rules, I didn’t take it too seriously. I was a little disturbed that Jax told Brittany’s mother and grandmother that he was going to marry her, after he sought out contraband liquid courage to do it. They seemed thrilled, although I’m not sure why, but what bothered me was my immediate reaction that this might be Jax’s way of trying to stay relevant within the Bravo franchise. Could a wedding spin-off be far behind? Bleh.

💃 Odd Mom Out continues to be entertaining. And you don’t have to be a mom, or the odd one out, to enjoy it. Like Seinfeld, if you’re a New Yorker, the jokes are funnier, but you don’t have to be one to laugh.

Kentucky

 

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August 9, 2017 – Jared Text Stalks Hayden, Tinsley Has a Party & Some Gordon

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Jordan tells Nathan that she’ll let him know if she finds out anything about Julian’s trial. Maxie calls, saying she has another layover on her way back from Paris.

Kiki is excited about having been recruited for a medical emergency. Dr. Bench asks to speak with her.

Finn says they’re on their way tomorrow; no turning back. Idiot Jared sends his clock GIF to Hayden again. Finn says there will be a short guest list, and asks if she has any second thoughts. He says she seems distracted, and asks if she’s okay.

In the park, Stella asks Curtis to get a BLT from Kelly’s for her. What the blip is in those sandwiches that everyone loves them so much? He asks if she’ll be okay by herself. She says she’ll have her cell phone, and he tells her not to get in any trouble. After he leaves, she hears something, and looks through the bushes. She’s like OMG. Valerie comes jogging past.

The doctor tells Kiki she went way beyond her responsibilities and took liberties. She says she’s sorry if she did anything wrong, but he says he was impressed and her efforts didn’t go unnoticed. He asks if she’s considered going to medical school.

Stella wonders aloud what’s going on in the world. Valerie asks if she’s okay. She wants to call the police, and Valerie says she’s an off-duty officer. Max and Felicia come out putting on their clothes, and Stella tells Valerie that they were having relations.

Maxie has to leave in two hours. Nathan asks if she can leave tomorrow, but she wants to get back for Georgie’s camp presentation. She appreciates his understanding. He tells her that if she has any concerns, she can talk to him. She suggests a romantic picnic lunch in the park. She says he can finish what he started to say the last time they saw each other.

Stella tells Mac and Felicia that it’s not the place to act like farm animals, and if she wanted to see porno she’d have expanded her cable. Felicia says Valerie knows them; they’ve been married a long time, and were just spicing things up. Valerie says that Stella has a point, and she could arrest them. Mac is like no harm no foul, but Stella insists that Valerie write them up. She says no one is above the law. Felicia says their son-in-law is Detective Nathan West, and he can straighten things out.

Nathan tells Maxie that he doesn’t remember what he was going to say. His phone rings. It’s police business, and he has to see what it is. Maxie says she’ll come along. She doesn’t have that much time, and doesn’t want to let him out of her sight.

Hayden tells Finn that so much still has to be done. The license was easy, but pulling everything together in 24-hours isn’t easy. Finn tells her the Quartermaines have something they don’t – staff. Curtis joins them, and asks when it’s going down, Hayden tells him that it’s tomorrow, and he says his invite must have gotten lost in the mail. Hayden tells him that he’s the first guest they’re inviting, and he’d better be there, and wear a tie. Hayden’s phone rings, and she says she has to attend to some details; some things have to be kept secret from the groom. She jets. Her phone keeps ringing as she’s walking. Jared texts that he won’t be ignored. I guess when he says a week, he means five minutes.

Nathan thinks it was a couple of teens in the bushes, but Valerie says not exactly. Valerie tells him that Stella wants to charge them with indecent exposure, and technically, she’s correct. Maxie enters the picture, bearing to-go drinks, and asks if Mac and Felicia got mugged. Stella says it’s public indecency. Maxie says those are her parents, and Stella asks what they’re teaching their daughter. Felicia says Maxie turned out just fine, and Stella adds despite her freaky parents. Nathan tells Stella they can take it from here, and she reluctantly leaves. Nathan asks if it’s their first offense, and tells Valerie they need to know when justice is blind or needs to squint. Valerie says that she’s off duty anyway, and doesn’t really want to do paperwork. She tells Felicia and Mac to consider it a warning. Felicia is embarrassed, and says she’ll make it up to Nathan and Maxie, but Maxie says forget about it. She just has one question – wth?

Dr. Bench tells Kiki that she should apply to the fast track program. Kiki asks why, since he doesn’t know her. He says that he saw her in action. She was focused, cool-headed, and took care of business. He’s heard nothing but good things about her, and is firm believer in talent. They need people like her. Jordan comes out of the elevator, and asks to talk to him. He tells Kiki to think about it.

Finn tells Curtis that he doesn’t really have any friends in town since Tracy is gone, but Curtis stepped up and was there when he was recovering. Curtis asks if Finn is asking him to be best man. Finn says that he can’t think of anyone he’d like better, and Curtis says he’d be honored.

In the park, Jared comes up behind Hayden, scaring her. She asks why he’s stalking her with texts, and he asks where the wire transfer is. She tells him that there’s a problem, and he says she has a problem.

Kiki calls Dillon. She has news, but will tell him when she sees him.

Maxie tells Mac that when she was in high school, he wouldn’t even let her wear low rise jeans, and now he’s getting busy in a public park. Mac says they’re healthy, breathing, living adults. Felicia says they’re also empty nesters, trying to redefine their relationship. Maxie asks why they don’t just go on a river cruise like normal parents. Mac says he got professional advice. Maxie thinks he means a marriage counselor, but he says it was from Man Landers. Maxie asks if he suggested al fresco sex, and he says Man Landers kicked his marriage into high gear.

At the hospital, Finn approaches Elizabeth, and asks if she’s talked to Hayden. She hasn’t, so Finn tells her about the engagement. She congratulates him, and he says the wedding is tomorrow. She wonders why so soon, and thinks it’s because of the baby. Finn asks if she can be there. He knows Hayden would want that; she’s family. Elizabeth says that she wouldn’t miss it.

Jared asks Hayden if this is some kind of ploy, and does he have to tell her what the consequences will be – saying bye-bye to Finn, Finn’s sobriety, and her new life with the baby. She tells him that GH is a non-profit, and the books are closely monitored. To get money, she has to do it in a way that doesn’t arouse suspicion. She’s set up a dummy company that she’ll buy products from. In the end, she’ll look like a dupe who got suckered. She may get fired, but she’ll have her life back. She gives him the company information and a card to access the account. She tells him it will be there tomorrow. Curtis sees them.

Maxie wonders how Mac could fall for that overrated hack. Nathan is like, hey, and she says he turned down her magazine and isn’t an expert in anything since he has no degrees. Nathan says that there’s something to be said for street smarts. Maxie tells him Man Landers almost got her parents arrested, but he says it’s not fair to blame it all on blog. She asks why he’s defending Man Landers.

Kiki tells Dillon about what Dr. Bench said. She says a year ago, she wasn’t even thinking of working there, so medical school is a leap. Dillon says that Dr. Jerome has a ring to it. Kiki is like, no, and he tells her to say it out loud. She says that she appreciates the support, but what if she doesn’t have what it takes?

Jordan asks Dr. Bench about an altercation on the second floor, and he wonders if he should be alarmed. She thinks it was probably a ruse to get Jason into a patient’s room. Dr. Bench says oh, the G-man, Garvey Sullivan, shocking me that the Garvster has a last name. The doctor says he feels like he’s in a 40s gangster flick. Jordan talks about James Cagney, saying she grew up on his movies, and Dr. Bench asks if that’s why she became a cop. He tells her that they’re showing The Roaring 20s, and asks if she’d like to join him

Stella sees Valerie at Kelly’s. She says needs to catch her breath, and Valerie tells her to sit down. She asks her not to judge Port Charles by the unusual scene in the park, but it was a little entertaining. Stella says she’s looking for her nephew. They were supposed to meet at the park, but he was going to get sandwiches, and she must have missed him. Valerie suggests texting him. Stella finds out Valerie is single. She’s shocked and asks why she wants to be alone. Valerie says it is what it is right now, and Stella tells her that maybe there’s something they can do about that.

Curtis thought Hayden was out planning the big day. She acts like she just ran into Jared, and introduces him as someone from college. Curtis asks if he’s there for the big day tomorrow, and Jared is like, tomorrow? Hayden says that she didn’t have time to tell him, and understands if he can’t make it. He says he wouldn’t miss it. After he’s gone, Curtis asks what’s going on? He asks if the text she got was from Jared, and says that she was acting funny just now. Hayden says that she was just surprised to see him.  Curtis says she can tell him anything, and asks if she’s in trouble.

Curtis asks if he looks like a fool. The last time she was that sketchy, she was hiding her father’s diamonds. She says that her past is haunting her, and Curtis asks if Jared is blackmailing her. He tells her that he can do something about that, but she says she can’t risk it. Jared had nothing to lose, and the power to blow up her life. She made a huge mistake a long time ago, and doesn’t want it to destroy her future. Curtis asks what’s going to stop him from being greedy, but Hayden says that’s the risk she has to take. He says he’s not one to judge, but knows about regretting the past. The best thing he did was own his mistakes, so he doesn’t have to look over his shoulder all the time, waiting to be exposed. She needs to listen to him and not be a victim. He tells her to talk to Finn; take Jared’s leverage away before she’s in too deep.

Valerie wonders if Stella is about to set her up. Stella says she’s in town visiting her nephew, and thinks they’d hit it off – as friends; you can’t have too many friends. Valerie says she’s not into blind dates, especially being set up by someone she doesn’t know. Stella questions her trusting a dating app, and says she was just suggesting coffee with the three of them. If Valerie doesn’t like it, she can always arrest her. She has nothing to lose. Valerie says maybe she’s right.

Maxie says she knows what’s going on – Nathan is a fan and reads the blog. He admits that he reads it sometimes, and blames Mac for raising a super sleuth daughter. Mac asks Maxie not to be mad, and he and Felicia leave. Maxie is like, omg, and Nathan says he thinks they learned their lesson. Maxie says she’s more upset that this is how she spent her layover. Nathan misses her, and she says that not seeing him is hard, but knowing she might not see him for a while is harder. She asks him to come to Portland – for good. She knows he has reasons to stay, but it’s good for her there. The only thing missing is him. She wants them to leave on a good note, but wants him to think about it. He wanders off and she sits down to make a phone call. She says she has a great story, and what do they think about unmasking Man Landers’s identity?

Kiki tells Dillon that it’s not realistic. Med students are always studying and get straight A’s; she doesn’t think she’s up for it. Dillon tells her believe in herself. He believes that she can do whatever she puts her mind to, but he’ll support whatever decision she makes. They kiss, and he says the one question she has to ask herself is if she wants to be a doctor.

Jordan tells Dr. Bench that she doesn’t think dating a witness is good idea. He says that he saw nothing, and isn’t a very good witness. She tells him that she just got out of a relationship, and isn’t looking right now. He says he’s just asking for a movie and a drink. She thanks him, but says no, not there yet. He tells her that you’re not ready until you’re ready. Another Port Charles philosopher.

Stella gives Valerie her number, and says she’ll set thing up for tomorrow. They introduce themselves, and Stella says they’ll get the dating apps off her phone yet. Stella finds Curtis outside Kelly’s. He says he almost called the hospital, and she tells him that she thought she could catch him before he left. He asks how she enjoyed her day. She says it was unnerving, but mostly wonderful, and more productive than he thinks.

Hayden comes to the hospital. Finn says that he told Elizabeth the news. Hayden needs to talk to him, but his phone goes off with an ICU emergency. He says he’ll call her when he’s done. Elizabeth asks Hayden what’s wrong. Hayden says Elizabeth was right about her when she met her. She was someone who got out of paying consequences at all costs, but she’s changed. She’s not the same person, and asks if Elizabeth sees that. Elizabeth says that they all do, and wonders where this is coming from. Hayden says that she just wants the wedding to go off without hitch, and doesn’t want anyone or anything to ruin it. Elizabeth tells her that if she needs help, she’ll do whatever is needed. She wants to make sure nothing spoils Hayden’s big day. Hayden asks her to be maid of honor, and they hug.

On the phone, Jared leaves a message for Hayden not to think of screwing him over. He says that she knows what’s at stake if she does, and calls her Rachel. Finn meets Hayden, who tells him that she asked Elizabeth to be maid of honor. Finn tells her that he asked Curtis to be best man, and asks what she wanted to talk about. Elizabeth interrupts, saying that there’s been suspicious activity with the hospital account, and they need to speak with Hayden.

Tomorrow, Julian asks Scotty if he’s trying to harm his case, Ava goes out to lunch and gets pointed at, and Jared looks for Hayden at the hospital.

The Real Housewives of NYC

Bethenny visits Carole. Carole has become an official cat lady, and can’t open the windows because she doesn’t have screens. Bethenny says it’s like a cat sauna. Carole asks Bethenny about her new place. She tells Carole that her architect has never had as many problems with a building, and they won’t let him self-certify, which is a usual procedure. Carole says she had a great time in Mexico. Bethenny says she couldn’t have been happier – even if they’d taken acid, the trip couldn’t have been better. They talk about Tinsley’s new love, Scott. Carole thinks Ramona should move into Sonja’s. It’s haunted in a good way.

Tom and Luann play tennis. She says they’re still in their honeymoon phase, and it makes me feel weird knowing they’re already divorcing. She says they’re evenly matched at tennis, unlike how Ramona and Mario were. We flash back to Mario yelling at Ramona on the court. She says she taught Tom how to play, and now he’s beating her. She tells him about Tinsley’s party. She thinks everybody is happy for them now, and in her interview, says that she was on a mission to make it work, and she did. Now I feel really uncomfortable.

Ramona visits Sonja, who’s redecorated. She didn’t want to change anything until her daughter was stable, and now it’s sexier. Whatever that means. More pillows? She’s happy that Frenchie is back, since long distance relationships rarely work out. She tells Ramona that Tinsley moved out. We see a clip of Tinsley packing. Ramona wants to move in next, since both Tinsley and Luann found partners after living there. She’s glad everyone is on a good page, and they walked away in harmony from the Mexico trip. They talk about how she and Bethenny made up. She tells Sonja about Tinsley wanting to throw her a party. Sonja says that Tinsley wanted to start fresh, and she was screaming at her on the trip. Ramona says that was bad. In her interview, Sonja thinks it’s just a public statement. Ramona calls Tinsley self-absorbed. I look at the TV like… 😕

Bethenny is having lunch in her new place with a nice-looking hockey player who’s missing a front tooth. She says she’s been a serial monogamist, and isn’t used to dating. Hockey guy has some kind of bridge that he takes out to eat, but doesn’t want a permanent tooth, because hockey. Dorinda comes in, and is wowed by the apartment. She’s also impressed by hockey guy’s butt. Bethenny gives a tour, and tells them how it’s going to be renovated. She tells us that renovations are therapeutic. She could make money by flipping it, but wants to live there.

Tinsley calls about the party cake. She’s living in a hotel, because she wasn’t ready for a commitment to an apartment. She wants the NYC skyline around the tiers on the cake, and tells us that she wants the party to be special. There’s a knock at the door – it’s Carole. Geez, like Carole says, she landed nice. This hotel room is like a small apartment. Carole regifts her something from Dorinda. I think it’s a candle. She says now Tinsley and Sonja can be friends. Tinsley says in Mexico, they’d had enough of each other. She says that she’s expecting fifty people, and it was just a joke when she said it was an f-u party. Carole says it should be her happy-as-a-lark party.

John comes to Dorinda’s place. It’s their first dinner together in a while. Dorinda says now that Hannah has moved out, she can do the homemaker thing again. John has brought a replica of a Beyonce gown that Dorinda had admired. It looks like a wedding dress, and Dorinda says take it a step at a time. In her interview, she says if they ever got married, it would city hall and an Armenian diner afterward. Everyone thinks he’s moving in, but they both enjoy their separate time. She doesn’t get lonely; she calls it freedom. She says he’d softened Hannah up with his dry-cleaning abilities, and they’re in a better place.

Adam walks Carole’s dog with her. She says his moving out has made the relationship stronger. He says he never really moved in. She likes being in relationships, but it’s not a need. Living with someone is stressful for her, and she feels at her most authentic when she’s free. She’s trying to find a balance.

A glam squad comes to help Tinsley get ready for the party. Scott calls and asks if she’s excited, and she says she’ll be happy when it’s over. She says it makes her nervous to make a toast.

Sonja complains to Frenchie that it’s freezing. He has to go back to Burgundy to renovate his hotel. She’s going to be staying there for ten days prior to the renovation. She says the things she does for love – and a croissant. She’s feeling good about it, and will be meeting his parents, but she not letting go of Rocco, just in case. Sonja washed Frenchie’s business cards that were in his jeans, and he says they look more vintage. She says that the party is duplicitous, and she’s not interested in being a part of that.

Tinsley gets to the venue. The cake is amazing, black and white with the NYC skyline around each tier, and tchotchkes, like a small Statue of Liberty, on it. Tinsley gives the workers Thank You, Sonja T-shirts to wear, with XOXO, Tinsley on the back. Carole asks one of the waiters if he slept with Luann, but I’m not sure why. The view is incredible. Scott thanks Carole for introducing him to Tinsley. She says she fixed Tinsley up with her dentist first before she thought of him. Everyone starts to wonder if Sonja is coming. Dorinda says after hearing her badmouth TInsley so much, she wouldn’t be throwing a thank you party, but burning the house down.

Ramona drags a couple of friends along. She doesn’t know if Sonja is showing up, since she was in bed when Ramona called, and didn’t feel like getting ready. She thinks it’s an f-u party. Tinsley is starting to panic that Sonja isn’t going to show. Bethenny says that she has a bad attitude about the party, comparing it to Ramona’s new beginnings party. She wonders why they just can’t have a plain, old party. Ramona tries to call Sonja, but gets voicemail. She thinks it would be insulting for her not to show, and hopes Sonja does the right thing. Tinsley’s sister comes in, and they look and act almost like twins. Tom’s ex, Missy, is also in attendance.

The guest of honor finally arrives, with gay friend Tyler. I guess Frenchie left already. Ramona asks who told her about Tinsley saying it was and f-u party, and she says it was Carole. Tinsley gives Sonja a hug and kiss, and shows her the cake. In her interview, she says thank you is everywhere, but Sonja isn’t seeing it that way. Sonja complains about the Sonjatinis that Tinsley had created, claiming there’s house liquor in them. Tinsley is happy she’s there, but it’s awkward, and Sonja keeps knocking her. She wanted it to be something special. Harry is there, looking old. Sonja tells him Frenchie tossed her like a salad before he left. Ramona says Scott seems like a normal nice guy, and that’s what Tinsley needs.

Ramona tells Bethenny that she wishes she had a partner in life. Bethenny says she pretends everything is okay. In her interview, Bethenny says that she thinks Ramona not having anyone to take care of her is setting in, and she has compassion. Bethenny tells her that it will come. Ramona says she’s waiting for someone special.

Scott tells Tinsley she’s doing great. Sonja finds out her favorite vodka is in the cocktails, and I hope she feels really stupid. Missy asks Tom if he’s fine, and he says he gets choked up seeing her. Missy says ditto. He refers to the last time he saw her, which I believe is when she walked in on him and Luann while she was dating him. Some third party wants to hear his side of the story, and he removes his mic. Bad, bad Tom. Bethenny finds out that Frenchie’s last name is Vaudeville, and says it’s perfect for Sonja. Seriously. Bethenny thinks Tinsley has been passive aggressive with Sonja, and gets where she’s coming from. Sonja says that Tinsley plays damsel in distress, and likes to be the victim. In her interview, Bethenny says that she gives Sonja credit for not airing Tinsley’s dirty laundry. She thinks that Tinsley has to work her stuff out, and not drink vodka at 8 am. Luann’s son, Noel, shows up, and the ladies go crazy over him.

Tinsley says that she wants to give Sonja a present and a toast. Sonja says she doesn’t want a present or a toast, and I’m wishing someone would give her a swift kick already. Tinsley does it anyway. She says that Sonja reached out when she was at low point, and invited Tinsley into her home. She asks everyone to raise a glass to Sonja, and says she’s like a sister and a true friend. Sonja feels that the whole thing seemed fake up until now. She thinks that Tinsley does appreciate her, and wants to cry, since she came in “hot.” Tinsley gives Sonja a framed photo of the two of them. Luann laughs about the shot that Tinsley chose, since Tinsley is in the forefront, and the top of Sonja’s head is cut off. To make up for that, Tinsley also gives her a $5000 gift card for Bergdorf’s. All is forgiven.

It’s time to cut the cake, but Sonja just dives in, shoving some in her mouth. It’s the finale, and we’re told that Scott is moving to NYC to move in with Tinsley; Carole is training for he NYC marathon, despite her aversion to exercise; Bethenny – who says she got her smile and humor back – has taken the old apartment off the market, while waiting on the renovation of the new one; Dorinda – who just likes being Dorinda now – has allowed John to spend the night, but that’s it; Luann, well, we all know what happened; Ramona is cordial with Mario, and endured sharing their daughter’s graduation with him; Sonja went to France, and is still with Frenchie, but is also still keeping Rocco on the back burner.

Next time, part one of the reunion.

🍴 I missed some of MasterChef because I had to feed the dogs, but reigning champ, Shaun O’Neale, was a guest judge and also did some cooking. I didn’t see the first round of dishes, but Cate must have done well, since she was allowed to pick what kind of dish – sweet or savory – each cook would make with coconut. She basically tried to give each competitor what she thought they were weakest at. The cowboy dude (I forget his name) told Gordon he’d made a “deconstructed” something-or-other. Gordon said he was tired of the word deconstructed, and that it means covering up the mess. I agree. Like, who made that one up? Reba went home – her sweet dish was way too much sweet. Gordon praised her work ethic, and said they’d really miss her. She told everyone to keep their dreams alive, and that anything is possible, making everyone cry. She told us that she was going home to the best thing in the world – her family. I love a gracious exit. Next time, it’s the 50th anniversary of Caesar’s Palace, and even Gordon is nervous.

A Little Bit of Gordon in My Life

https://www.thrillist.com/news/nation/gordon-ramsays-scrambled-eggs-chef-reveals-recipe-in-new-video

GordonRamsayEggs

 

August 4, 2017 – Sam Wonders What’s Real, AMC Breaks Some Bad, Predictable Countess News & Quotes

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Ava tells Valentin that only two people in this world saw the good in her and could have loved her. She killed one, and he killed the other. Valentin tells her about how he hid from the world, but decided a life of hiding was no life at all. She says maybe she deserves it; she’s paying for what she did. She asks him to give her a good reason why he shouldn’t pay for what he did. He says he’s going to give her an offer she can’t refuse. Ava says if she heard those words from someone else, she’d dismiss them as empty, but she knows coming from him, it’s serious. He tells her that if she withdraws her statement, she can have her old life back, starting with her beautiful face.

Laura tells Spencer that they need to have a serious talk at home; this has to come to a stop. He’s worried that she’s referring to the lawsuit, but she tells him that she’s talking about his life in Port Charles. He suggests that they talk right there, and she says he can’t stay. Spencer says that he’ll go to public school, and promises to make up with Charlotte. He tells Laura that he’ll bring culture to his new place of education. Laura says that’s not what she’s talking about.

The Garvster tells Jason that he has to ask “her” about Sonny. Jason wonders who “her” is, but Garvey flatlines. Jason tries to get him to talk, but that’s not happening.

At the demolition site, Sonny tells Carly to go. She says if he wants her to live, he’ll get moving, and they start to walk, but Sonny isn’t exactly swift on his feet.

Sam dreams about all the times she saw Sonny in her head, culminating with her shooting him at the distillery. She wakes up, and Deanna asks if she had a bad dream, but Sam doesn’t know if it was a dream or not.

Sonny and Carly lie on the ground, surrounded by rubble. An announcement says that stage two of the demolition is coming. Carly tells Sonny to wake up.

Spencer tells Laura that his father’s spirit is all around Port Charles. Kelly’s is where Nikolas taught him to be brave and fight for what’s right, and he’s never going to stop fighting Valentin. Laura tells him that he’s going back to France.

Ava asks Valentin if he has a magic wand. He says no, but knows where she can get a cutting edge procedure. She says that she’s already been told nothing can be done, and she’ll look like this for the rest of her life. Valentin says he isn’t talking about traditional treatment, but the procedures that transformed him.

The doctors say they’re losing Big Garve.

The countdown for stage two of the demolition begins. Carly yells that someone is there, but no one hears her. She tries to get Sonny to stand, but he’s pinned down. As the countdown continues, he tells her to just leave. Dante runs up to the project manager, and tells him to stop. He has reason to believe someone is on site. Carly is moving debris off of Sonny. She asks if he can move, and for a guy who’s been shot and has been living in a filthy basement for 24-hours or more, he pulls himself up pretty well. Over the loudspeaker, the PM says they’re looking for someone on site. Carly kisses Sonny, because now is totally the time for that.

See you on the flipside, Garvey.

Carly tells Sonny to wait, and he says he’s not going anywhere. Dante runs up to them, and Carly tells him that Sonny is hurt. Dante lets Sonny know that Spencer is okay, and Sonny tells him about getting the text picture of Spencer in the basement.

Deanna tells Sam that some medications can cause nightmares, and she’ll see about getting Griff to prescribe something else. Jason walks in, and Deanna tells him that Sam’s vitals good. Sam says that sometimes she can’t think straight. She feels like she’s remembering things that happened that couldn’t have. Jason says that makes sense, considering, but she tells him that she’s confused, and asks how she can tell the difference between what she imagines and what happened? Jason tells her to just focus on getting better, but she feels like there’s something wrong. He says the kids are fine, and he’s fine. Sam asks about Sonny.

Laura says that when Spencer came back to Port Charles, Valentin was in custody, and they thought he was going to prison forever, but that didn’t work out. Spencer calls it a miscarriage of justice that must be righted. Laura says yes, but not by him. He falsely accused Valentin of kidnapping him, and snuck into Windemere when he was supposed to be at camp. Spencer begs her not to send him away, and asks if she doesn’t love him anymore.

Ava asks why Valentin would need a miracle – did Sonny leave him to burn in a warehouse fire too? Valentin explains about having scoliosis and a hunchback, along with a deformed face, saying he was the stuff of children’s nightmares. He was introduced to a group of geniuses, and when they were done, he had a life he never dreamed of. She asks why she should believe him. He tells her their methods aren’t proven, but sound, and he’s a living testimony. Ava points out that it’s just his say-so, and he asks to use her laptop. He logs into his old WSB profile (man, they are a sloppy bureau), and shows her a picture of himself as he used to look.

Dante tells Carly that the doctors are optimistic about Sonny. Carly says that he kept telling her to leave, and that Dante saved them both. Dante says that he raced over as soon as he got a call from Michael about the bullet casing. Carly says the Garvinator shot Sonny and left him to die.

Sam asks if Jason has talked to Sonny. Her dreams seem to be about them threatening each other. She can’t remember exactly, but she was desperate and angry. She says that she would never hurt him, would she? Jason tells her that she’s been through a lot, and her mind is just trying to make sense of what’s happening with her body. He tells her to focus on what’s real – them. It’s going to take time. She says it was about keeping them safe, and asks how she’s been acting. Jason admits she’s been overprotective, but says that’s the illness. Sam asks if she threatened people, and Jason says no; she just seemed concerned for his safety. Sam says it was about Sonny.

Griff tells Carly that the bullet was extracted, and there were no complications. Sonny has lost a lot of blood (not the first time), but once his fluids are replenished, a full recovery is expected. He might be groggy, but asked for her. Fastest. Surgery. Ever. Carly goes into Sonny’s room, and he asks if she’s okay. She tells him that she’s fine, and he’s going to be fine too. He made it. He says of course. She says that she was scared that she lost him; he’d been missing for hours, but she found him. She’ll never give up on him. Sonny tells her that they’re a team. He says that she should have left, but she says it’s over and it’s fine. She just got him back, and wasn’t risking her life without him. She tells him to just say thank you, and says that he’s too doped up to make sense. Dante joins them. He tells Sonny they know that the Big Garvbowsky lured him out and shot him twice, but asks if Sonny can take him through what happened.

Sam tells Jason that she thought Sonny wanted him to work in the business again, and wanted to take him away, but that doesn’t sound right. She wouldn’t have to protect him from Sonny, but thought she did. He tells her stop stressing, but she hates feeling like this. He tells her rest up, so she can get her strength back and come home. The kids love and need her, and so does he.

Ava asks if that’s really Valentin, and then says she can almost see who he is now in the picture. Valentin says he doesn’t; he was born handicapped, and had to make compromises to get what he needed. He’s not a saint or a sinner, but both. Ava says Nikolas’s death wasn’t a small thing, and she’s surprised at him, since he’s a father. Valentin says the charges have been dropped, but Spencer is being encouraged. Ava wonders if he’s afraid that Spencer is going to win. Valentin says no, but unpleasantries on both sides are going to come up. Spencer might be brat, but doesn’t deserve to hear about his father’s bad side. His main concern is Charlotte though, and he wants it to go away.

Laura says that she loves Spencer with all her heart. He says he wants to stay, and she tells him that she does too, but more than that, she wants him safe. Valentin is a dangerous man, and she and Doc saw it firsthand. She asks what if he had lost his temper when he found Spencer at Windemere? What if he hurt him, or worse, and escaped justice? Spencer would be gone, and he’s all she has left of his father. She can’t bear to lose him. Spencer pleads with her not to send him away. Doc says it’s a difficult decision for all of them. They love having him there – he makes them laugh, and think, and challenges them – but they have to act in his best interest. At his age, he thinks there won’t be consequences and that he’s immortal, but he’s not. Valentin is an ongoing threat, and it scares them, even if it doesn’t scare him. Spencer says being all alone scares him. Nice acting. Spencer doesn’t often get to emote that way. What’s kind of funny though, is that Valentin hasn’t threatened anyone the entire time he’s been in Port Charles. He’s the one who’s been threatened by everyone else, including this kid. IMO, he has the patience of a saint.

Valentin tells Ava that Spencer is fortunate; he knows that he’s loved and wanted. Ava says she stole that from him; she saw him shoot Nikolas. Valentin says that didn’t happen. He tells her that she’s far from the path of overcoming her circumstance. What good is she, and what is she doing for the world? She has to take stock of herself. She says that she’s not a good person, and has inflicted pain on people. She wants to hold on to the one thread of decency she has, and wants to prove she’s not as ugly on the inside as she is on the outside. Even if she believed him about his geniuses, she’s not changing her testimony. She remembers and knows what happened. Nikolas defended her, and Valentin murdered him. Nikolas was a father too, and Spencer deserves to know that the world isn’t as unfair as it Valentin would have him believe.

Laura says that Spencer isn’t alone, and he says that he’s an orphan. Doc says that he has his grandmother, the rest of his family, and him. Laura says even if he’s not there physically, he’s always in her heart. She wants to protect him, not get rid of him. Spencer tells them that if he’s gone, how will he keep an eye on Valentin? Laura says that’s not his responsibility. Spencer whines that he won’t get to sue him. It pales in comparison to sending him to prison, but it’s the next best thing he can do. Doc says that he should honor his father’s memory by being the fantastic kid that he is. Laura wants to honor Nikolas by keeping him safe, and tells him that his father would want him to have a long and happy life. Spencer says he’ll go to France, and they’ll both honor his father. He hugs Laura.

Jason tells Sam to concentrate on the here and now, and what’s real; she’s improving. Sam says what about her mind, and Jason says that she’s exhausted and needs to rest. He tells her to dream of coming home, and how happy they’ll be. All of this will be over soon.

Sonny starts fading into sleep. Dante tells him that he called Michael, and to just take it easy for now. Sonny thanks him, and asks about Avery. Carly says that she’s fine, and misses him. She tells him to get some rest, so she can take him home. They do the I love you thing.

In the hallway, Jason and Carly hug. Carly tells him that Garvo shot Sonny and left him for dead, but he’s going to be okay. She asks about Sam, and Jason says she’s doing well. The antibiotics are working, but she’s confused, and doesn’t know what’s real or not.

Sam dreams about being at the distillery again, holding the gun on Sonny. She’s telling him that she’s not letting her kids end up like Morgan, and that he pulls death and destruction toward him. She shoots.

Ava tells Valentin to leave. He says it’s her call, but she should think about it. He knows enough to know that she’ll want her old life back, and they can fix it. She says that nothing will be better than telling truth for Nikolas and Spencer. Valentin tells her to think about it. As she closes the door, I take note of the awesome blue, ombre tie-dyed robe she’s wearing. She takes her mask off.

Laura tells Spencer that the fall semester starts soon, but she wants to bring him early, since he’ll be in an accelerated program. Spencer is happy that she’s coming with him, and she says she’ll be staying for a few weeks to settle him in. It will make it easier on both of them; she has to get used to not having him around. He asks if she isn’t going to miss Doc, and says he will too. Doc says he’s coming along, and Laura hugs him. Spencer says group hug, and they do. Must be nice to just be able to take off for France. They did the same thing on Million Dollar Listing NY last night.

Ava has a martini. She takes the drape off the mirror, and looks at herself. She says, oh God, oh God, oh God.

Sam keeps dreaming. Sonny is asking Sam to let him help her, and promising it will be fine. She doesn’t want to do something she’ll take back.

Sonny asks how much Jason knows. Dante pops back in and says he just found out that Ole Garve is dead. Carly says she can’t say she’s sorry, since he kidnapped Spencer and shot Sonny. Sonny says Garvey didn’t shoot him.

Sam dreams about Sonny saying that he understands she’s going through something. She’s like family to him. He puts his hand over hers on the gun, and lowers it. The gun goes off, shooting him in the leg. He says he knows it wasn’t her and she didn’t mean to do this. She says that she did, and gives him a swift kick into the opening to the cask room. She wakes up and says, no!

On Monday, Kiki isn’t going anywhere, Hayden talks to her father, and Dante asks Sonny who shot him.

⚛ I’m caught up with Zoo, although I missed an episode somewhere. At present, my obsession with 90 Day Fiancé – Happily Ever After? is satiated, but I’m still lagging behind with Preacher and The f Word. I’m also up-to-date, for at least the third time, with Breaking Bad. If you haven’t seen this show, you need to, but only if you like intelligent TV. If you’ve seen it before, watch it fresh on Sundays when AMC is running a marathon. Why? Who knows. What difference does it make? For the uninitiated, in a nutshell, the plot revolves around a chemistry teacher who has decided to dabble in making crystal meth when he gets a cancer diagnosis. A guy’s got to provide for his family, and sadly, a drug dealer makes more than a sick teacher. Probably more than any teacher. Along with a former student, Walter White breaks bad all over the place, while we get to enjoy top-notch acting, writing, and all of those departments that get awards that aren’t televised. Bryan Cranston stars, and having also been in one of the few sitcoms I like (he was the father on Malcolm in the Middle), it’s a real treat to see him playing Walter, juggling home and work life. It can get pretty violent, so it’s not for kids, but I was raised by a sailor and grew up on war movies, B horror films, and musicals, so if you’re a parent, it’s your call. They’re up to season four, but there’s always On Demand.

♛ Did you hear? Luann de Lesseps D’Agostino, of The Real Housewives of New York de Lesseps D’Agostinos, is getting unmarried soon. So, how many people called this? Put your hands down; I can’t count that high. She was recently on Watch What Happens Live, explaining that the slap she gave Tom while they were dining out was merely a love tap, and a symptom of the passionate love affair they were having. Funny too, they just wrapped up the reunion. Methinks Luann was wise from the jump, but went through with it to save face, and timed the ending so it wouldn’t be aired or discussed during the reunion. No doubt there will be I told you so’s next season, but there will also be some distance.

Quotes of the Week

There is no such thing as perfection. What I consider beautiful, most likely you don’t.Mila Kunis (Funny, since I’m watching Bad Moms right now, and I chose this randomly. Twilight Zone music…)

If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.Dolly Parton

I’m still hung over from the 80s. – someone on Growing Up Supermodel

🌬 And of course, the greatest Housewife quote of all…

Don'tBeUncool

Countess, we salute you.

August 2 – Sam Wakes Up, the Mexico Trip Winds Down & Brien is Sunk by a Cannoli

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Calling from Nelle’s place, Michael wants Sonny’s people searching along the river front. Nelle asks if he’s okay, and he says he’s climbing the walls. She asks if there’s news, but he says nothing since Dante updated them. He doesn’t think his dad is dead, but maybe hurt or trapped, and the longer it takes to find him the worse it will get.

Jason talks to an unconscious Sam about Danny feeling Scout kick, and thinking it was a magic trick. He talks about when they brought Scout home. He told Scouthow lucky she is to have Sam as a mother because she’s tough. He asks her not to make a liar out of him.

Josslyn opens the front door, and Oscar falls over on the porch.

Tracy has sent Finn something for Hayden. It looks like a Tiffany bag, and he says something about gemology, so I assume it’s a ring. Hayden shows up at the hospital since she missed him. She asks if he wants breakfast, but he says he has something to do first. Deanna tells him that he has a patient waiting, and Hayden has someone waiting with an invoice question.

Except it’s Jared. She asks what he’s doing there. He asks if she can fix his broken heart. Please. Where’s Danny Trejo with some latte?

Josslyn tells Oscar that she was getting the newspaper and didn’t mean to scare him. He apologizes for creeping up like a stalker. Josslyn says that Carly gave her stamp of approval, and Oscar insists that’s because of the tie. It always works with parents. She tells him he can use the doorbell, but he says that he didn’t want to intrude; he was just going to leave something for her. She says it’s less bad with him there.

Nelle gives Michael some coffee. He says he’s freaking out. She says he has an instinctive need to handle every situation. He tells her that he became a compulsive fixer as a child, holding everything together. Nelle says she’ll take a personal day and help him look for his dad. He’s her priority today.

Jared tells Hayden that they have business, and Hayden asks if they have to do it at her place of business. She says that she never asked him to cover for her, and he says that she didn’t exactly say no. They have a bond that goes past marriage. She can deal with him, or he deals with Finn. She asks for a half hour, but she doesn’t want him waiting there. She reminds him that if Finn finds out, he loses his leverage. He says he knows the perfect spot.

Finn asks what Griff thinks of the ring. Griff doesn’t know the 4 C’s, but says it’s got them all. Deanna says that Hayden will love it. Hayden walks up behind Finn, asking love what? and everyone disappears. She asks why they took off so fast, and what is Finn hiding behind his back? He didn’t realize he was doing this right now, but shows her the ring, saying that he wants to make it proper.

Jason talks to Danny on the phone. He says Sam misses him, but is doing okay, and needs more time to rest. He asks Danny to be good for his grandma, and tells him that he loves him. Sam opens her eyes.

Josslyn tells Oscar that Carly is out looking for Sonny. Oscar says they can go search if she wants, but Josslyn wouldn’t know where to start. She asks to talk about something else. He thought maybe it was bothering her, but she says it’s okay. She tells him that she’s not sure when she found out that Sonny was a mobster. He was just Uncle Sonny, who her mother was married to once, and gradually she figured it out. For a while she thought it was cool to be close to someone so powerful, but she was stupid not to see the other side of it. The guards were there to protect them, but sometimes they can’t. This time, they weren’t there to protect Sonny. She’s been furious at Sonny, but her mom loves him, and Josslyn has known him her whole life. She doesn’t want anything to happen to him.

Deanna tells Sam to breath slowly and deeply. Sam asks what happened, and Jason tells her that she collapsed in the penthouse, but she’s not sure she remembers. Deanna leaves to get the doctors. Jason says everything is going to be okay.

Finn thinks that Hayden doesn’t like the ring, and tells her that Tracy picked it out. Hayden is impressed that Tracy a diamond delivered to him before breakfast. He tells her a story about a guy owing Tracy a favor. When she asks what he did, Finn says the point of blackmail is not to disclose the actions that caused it to happen. She says he already gave her a ring, and he asks if she wants to keep the onion ring. She hugs him, and by the elevator behind him, Jared points to his watch. Hayden tells Finn that she’s going to get it sized right now, and they kiss.

Michael thanks Nelle for letting him crash there. She says as far as personal debt goes, he’s way ahead. She says that if she doesn’t have to help someone, she dwells on the past. Everything is going right, and she gets nervous; she has a phobia about being happy. He says he’ll do everything he can to change that.

Hayden finds Jared at the house. I just don’t see these two together, even in her old life. For one thing, he seems too old. Not necessarily in age, but the way he presents himself. Maybe she was marrying her father. Jared asks if she made an offer on the house. He says if she didn’t, she can still back out, and he starts telling her about mold on the tennis court. She tells him to save the act and cut to the chase. He says they don’t have to be at each other’s throats. If it were up to him – she says what? They’d still be married? She tells him that he spent more time in other women’s beds than their own, and now he’s blackmailing her. There’s no future. She asks how he wants to resolve it, and he says the only way to get rid of him is to make restitution.

Josslyn tells Oscar that she’s been smack talking Sonny, and now she’s concerned about him. Oscar must think she’s nuts. Oscar says it makes her human. People are more than one thing, and he thinks she sees Sonny more clearly than the people who think he’s either all good or all bad. Josslyn says most people believe he’s either a total criminal, or he’s misunderstood, but the truth is, he’s a little of both. He can be kind and generous, or awful, like what he did to her father. Oscar calls her perceptive, and she says not always – she was a brat about Sonny. He doesn’t think she’s a brat, and he gives her a necklace that he made from the bullet casing. Or as he says, the piece of metal they found. I find it hard to believe that with all the history he knows about, Oscar wouldn’t know what it is.

Finn says that Sam is on the on road to recovery. She asks what happened, and Griff asks what’s the last thing she remembers? She says she was at home with Jason, Sonny came over, and she left. She feels like she’s been dreaming. Griff says that’s common for people with this illness. Finn explains what she has, and that Scout is okay. He tells her about the treatment, and knows it sounds scary, but she’s out of the woods.

In the hallway, Jason thanks Finn and Griff. He says he owes them, but they both say it’s just their job. Finn leaves, and Jason asks Griff about Sam’s memory. He tells Jason to give it time. She’ll probably remember, but don’t push it.

Josslyn tells Oscar that the necklace is perfect. Oscar says his stuff isn’t for everyone, but I’m thinking he could make a bundle at flea markets. He says she doesn’t have to wear it, but she wants to. He puts it on her, and says it looks amazing.

Hayden says she knows that Jared wants money, but he says he wants redress. He sacrificed his time and good name. Hayden tells him that he can’t sacrifice something never had, and he tells her that a little appreciation might buy her some good will. She says she does appreciate it, and is willing to do what she can. She tells him that she can get him an interview at ELQ. They’ll listen to her, and he’ll be in the inner circle. He says he’s not looking for a job, but a payout, and she says it will be better in the long term. Jared doubts they’d hire someone with his record, but she’ll find out what that’s like when he exposes her. He wants money, but Hayden says that she doesn’t have it. She wishes she could honor promise, but has nothing to give. He grabs her hand, and says she’s got that, meaning her ring.

Jason updates Alexis on the phone. Sam tries to get out of bed. She wants to stretch, and Deanna says once around the floor. Jason helps her, and she asks him to fill her in.

Finn talks to his dead wife, Reiko, while he looks at a letter from her. He says he met someone, and it’s serious. He should have told her sooner, but thought he didn’t deserve to be happy. Maybe he was punishing himself for being alive, and not being able to save her. He tried to drive Hayden away, and she wouldn’t go. The more he screwed up, the more she stood by him. He says he has a baby coming, and they’re getting married. He doesn’t know how he got so lucky twice, but isn’t questioning it. He’s betting everything on Hayden. Dammit. I don’t know why Hayden doesn’t just talk to him.

Hayden tells Jared that it’s her engagement ring, and he can’t have it. He tells her to hock it, give him the cash, and she can get it back later. Like she’s going to get much for it. Hayden tells him that they’ll have to pry it from her cold dead hand. He says she’s afraid of what to say to Finn, and to just tell him that she lost it. She says it wouldn’t clear her debt to him anyway, but he says it’s an incentive to keep his mouth shut while she works off the rest. He tells her that once Finn finds out that she put a little girl in a wheelchair, how long will it be before he dumps her? Hayden knows that she ruined Jared’s life, and asks him not to ruin hers too. He says he’ll do her a solid, and give her a way to get what she owes at no cost to her.

Nelle says Michael must drive his family crazy. They’re impulsive, and think they’re winning arguments, while he sits there quietly and then changes everything. Josslyn arrives. She had to tell someone about the amazing thing that happened. She thinks she’s interrupting, but Michael tells her that they’re just getting ready to join the search. Josslyn shows Nelle the necklace, and Nelle says it’s definitely striking. She looks at Josslyn in a weird way, and Josslyn says the necklace is unique. Nelle says definitely again, and shows it to Michael. Josslyn asks if something is wrong, and Michael says he doesn’t think she realizes that it’s made from a bullet casing.

Jared says giving up the ring will cause more problems than it solves, and there’s a simpler solution. She can embezzle it; it’s her specialty. She says that she’s not an embezzler, and he says no, just a drunk driver. He wants her to steal the money from the hospital.

Finn says that a year ago, if anyone had suggested he’d be married and have a baby, he’d have punched them in the face; he thought he’d be dead. Reiko told him to fight and he did. He feels like he has a second chance at life, and wants to make the most of his time. He has a future and a family with Hayden. He wishes he could have all that, and keep Reiko around, but he can’t. She’d tell him the same thing. He sets the letter on fire, and cries a little. He wants her to know he’ll love her forever.

Jared says that Hayden is the CFO, and has the means and opportunity. He says it’s not like she’s hurting anyone, and she tells him it’s a hospital and there to heal the sick. He says it’s big business (truth!); how hard can it be to skim something off? Hayden says it’s impossible, and Jared tells her not to sell herself short. She says she worked hard to keep them in the black, and she won’t do it. He says Finn is in for a rude awakening when he finds out that the mother of his child isn’t the angel he thought she was. Her future with him is about to vanish unless she comes up with the money. She has one week.

Sam tells Jason not to treat her like a delicate flower. She sees the Garvman being wheeled by on a gurney, and he looks at her. Jason asks what’s wrong

Tomorrow, Sam thinks there’s something important she’s not remembering, Valentin has something that belongs to someone else, and it’s twenty minutes to demolition where Sonny is trapped.

The Real Housewives of NYC

Sonja insists that Ramona isn’t happy, but Ramona thinks Sonja is the one who’s not happy. Bethenny describes the group as a hangover meets the Golden Girls, and says wine tasting is for wimps; they go straight to tequila. Ramona says she misses her old life, but she’s embraced the life she has now. Bethenny calls Sonja an emotional buzzkill. In her interview, Tinsley says that Sonja hasn’t been drinking that much, but now she’s letting it loose. Everyone piles on a lounging sofa by the pool. Sonja shouts that she loves tequila – and Luann. In her interview, Luann says that Sonja tends to go bipolar when she’s drinking. Sonja wants to see everyone’s boobs. Bethenny gets nakey and jumps in the pool. Carole and Tinsley say their boobs are real, but they’re not showing anyone anything. Carole says she’ll bare hers for art, while the rest will bare them for tequila. Sonja tries to drink straight from the margarita pitcher, but Luann takes it out of her hands, saying, no, no, no. Sonja gets nakey and joins Bethenny in the pool. Dorinda says she doesn’t even go nakey in her own house.

In the pool, Bethenny talks to Ramona, saying she’s been mean. She says a friend would never have said the things she did about Bethenny’s past and her daughter. Ramona says she didn’t say anything about that, but roll the tape. Yep, there it is. Ramona asks why Bethenny is putting this all on her. Bethenny says because she did it. In her interview, she says Ramona keeps saying she didn’t mean to, but she did.  Ramona says she’s a miserable person. Dorinda tries to put Sonja’s bathing suit back on her, and says it’s like putting a bikini on a piece of spaghetti, and she’ll have to live with that sight for the rest of her life. Ramona tells Bethenny that she’s sorry she did what she did and hurt her. By now, they’re both crying. Ramona says that she doesn’t want to be that person, and Bethenny says that she doesn’t want her to be. Ramona is bawling, and keeps saying I don’t know. Bethenny hugs her, and says she’s not an evil or bad person. In her interview, Ramons says she’s embarrassed about what happened, and it’s not who she is. I hate when people say that. It is you, part of you anyway; you’re the one who did it. She tells us that she says things unedited, but she’s not coming from a place of mean, and there was no valid reason for her being that way. Holy! Is that actually sincere contrition coming from Ramona? She feels like a weight has been lifted off. Bethenny wants them to be respectful and not feel the anger. She says it’s closure. Luann suggests they get ready for dinner. Bethenny says her best reconciliations happen when she’s nakey, and realizes Sonja is wearing her bathing suit. Sonja tries to kiss Bethenny, and in her interview, Bethenny says she’s barking up the wrong vagina. They hug, and say I love yous. I’m glad I hate tequila.

Good thing it’s dinner at the villa. I don’t think this crew could make it very far. As usual, Bethenny is the first one at the table. Dorinda says it’s vacation time; they can do what they want. She says that Bethenny’s aggression is scaring he, and Bethenny says it’s an act. Dorinda starts doing her drunk thing with her hands waving around, and Bethenny imitates her. In her interview, Bethenny says that Dorinda is the weakest link in the drinking chain and a loose cannon. Somehow, Dorinda stabs herself in the hand trying to make a point. Bethenny feels responsible for everyone, and says now blood and a knife is involved. Dorinda tells Bethenny not to pressure herself to be perfect, and asks if it’s overwhelming to be correct all the time. She says that Bethenny is a lot of fun, but wants to be a super human on this trip. She tells Bethenny to let it go. Carole tries to say that Dorinda just meant they should be flexible, but Bethenny says an hour and a half of waiting is flexible. Sonja is sleeping. Tinsley apologizes to Ramona for telling her to shut up. She realizes that it was Sonja who leaked the info to the press. The girls hear fireworks, and go outside to watch. Bethenny tells Dorinda not to psychoanalyze her. Dorinda says she’s a mean bitch. Bethenny says that Dorinda has been harboring feelings, and now it’s coming out. Dorinda says she’s stuck up for Bethenny plenty of times, and leaves. Bethenny says f-u, but adds that Dorinda won’t remember it in the morning. In her interview, Bethenny says it was hurtful. She knows who she is, doesn’t need to be reminded, and it’s probably not going to change. Carole says that Bethenny is being hyper-sensitive. Tinsley says that Dorinda adores her, but Bethenny says she doesn’t think so. Dorinda does owe her an apology though.

In the morning, Ramona decides to try some yoga. She tells Luann she missed so much. Luann says that she talked to Tom and fell asleep. Ramona explains that she talked with Bethenny, and they bared their souls. Luann says that’s great until she screws it up again. Everyone gathers as the instructor waits. Luann asks if everyone is okay, but in her interview, Dorinda says she doesn’t really remember what the argument was about. She tells Bethenny all she was trying to say is that Bethenny is a great person, and she should relax. Bethenny asks if this is how she communicates with her friends. Dorinda says she has no hard feelings, and Bethenny says she doesn’t need to. Dorinda tells us that the only person who never sees her nasty side is her mother. Bethenny says Dorinda doesn’t know how to apologize.

In their room, Dorinda tells Carole that she feels badly, but doesn’t like when Bethenny calls her a nasty person. Instead of dealing with her feelings, she gets aggressive, and needs to deal with that. In her interview, Carole says that she wants Dorinda to know she has her back, since it isn’t fun to realize you were fighting with a friend when you were drunk. Dorinda thinks there’s a mouse in the room and freaks. In her interview, she talks about how much she hates them. True mouse story – after we were flooded during Hurricane Sandy, a mouse took up residence with us for a short time. I knew he was around, the dogs kept noticing something, and then we finally ran into each other one night in the kitchen. We locked eyes, and he was so tiny, and looked so frightened, it broke my heart. I wondered what he must have thought happened, and there was no way to explain it to him. I told him that I wasn’t going to hurt him, but he’d have to move on when all the chaos was over. I didn’t, and he did. I can never understand how anyone can be frightened of such a timid little thing. He looked like something off of a Hallmark card. How can you hate that?

Sonja calls Frenchie. She shows him her swimsuit, and looks like she’s using a TSA wand, going up and down her body with the phone. She says she doesn’t like sexting, but likes to flash. She thinks he should be more worried about the women than her picking up a man. The yoga instructor’s tagline is, the way you treat me is your path; the way I react, is mine. Pretty good. Sonja says she’s exhausted from being happy.

Dorinda and Bethenny talk. Dorinda says when her perception is that she’s being attacked, she attacks, and she reacted poorly. She had a beautiful day, and she was wrong. Nicely and simply put. Bethenny says she wants to make everyone feel good, but doesn’t want to gloat over her accomplishments. They hug it out, and I’m glad. They talk about the distillery, and Dorinda says it was amazing. She’s glad they got past their disagreement fast. Bethenny says she has an emotional hangover, and now she’s the one crying all the time

Tinsley, Ramona, and Carole go yachting with Captain Fred.

Bethenny asks if Tinsley is going to marry this guy (I assume she means the Miami date; I’ve forgotten his name already), and Sonja says that she wants to marry every guy she meets. On the boat, Tinsley gets a text, and says that she’s going to Vegas tomorrow. Carole says that Ramona is next, and suggests she move in with Sonja. Tinsley has been planning a thank you party since before Mexico, but now it’s a thank you party with a sprinkle of f-u.

Sonja says that Tinsley thinks they’re all great – until they’re not. Sonja says that Tinsley might have written a book on Southern charm, but thinks the party thing is just for show.

Carole excels in fishing, and sits in one of those fisherman’s chairs. She tells us that you need to be quiet and have patience to catch a fish, so clearly she’s the only one in the group who can do it. Two whales cavort in the water, and Carole dives in for a swim. I’m so jealous. Tinsley wonders what if a whale bites her, and Carole says maybe it will be a sperm whale. What? They don’t catch anything, so they’re buying a fish and saying they caught it.

Carole tells the others to keep their mouths shut. She thinks she’s the only one who can manage it though. She gives the fish to the chef. We flash to a clip of Carole holding the fish at the market like she caught it. In her interview, Luann thinks the captain of the boat probably caught the fish.

Bethenny thinks they’re getting along too well, and someone needs to be in a body bag before they leave. Dorinda thinks that Ramona is Benjamin Button and aging backwards. They go out for dinner, and toast to their last night. Dorinda says, they laughed, they cried, and no one ended up in jail. Luann says making out, falling down, helicopters – it was fabulous. Bethenny asks for the thorn and the rose, the best and worst things for them on the trip. Dorinda says of course her thorn was their disagreement. Carole says her thorn was seeing Dorinda upset, but her rose was rooming with Dorinda. Sonja says the helicopter ride was her rose, and Tinsley says she never felt more baller. Bethenny thinks that Tinsley is more wasted than Dorinda. Luann suggests that Tinsley not drop the f-bomb so much, since they’re in a restaurant. Tinsley tells Luann that she says Palm Beach too much when she means West Palm, and Luann is like, yeah, but that’s not offensive. Tinsley says there’s a huge difference. Luann asks where she lives in Palm Beach, with her mother? Bethenny says it’s a social nucleus, and suggests they put a pin in it, but not Dorinda, since she’s already had an accident. Ramona says that she and Bethenny’s time in the pool together was her rose, but her thorn was when she hadn’t been invited. She felt like she was in Mean Girls. In her interview, she says we grow as people and aren’t perfect. She’s so deep. Dorinda tells them that her rose was the horse dancing to the mariachi band, and their argument was her thorn. Bethenny agrees. Luann starts to say that her husband is her rose, and everyone is like, enough already. Bethenny makes fun of her saying Palm Beach, dah-ling.

Next time, John shows Dorinda a wedding dress (she’s like, whoa, Nellie!); Tinsley throws her party, but Sonja is a no-show, and Tom takes his mic off to talk about Missy.

🍗 The cooks on MasterChef  fed local merchants, from bee keepers to artisan butchers (whatever those are), using their products. The blue team made fish, while the red team made a pork chop dish. As usual, everything looked fantastic to me, because I never would have made it past the first round. Scratch that, I wouldn’t have made it to the first round. The red team ended up with the pressure test, except for Yachecia, who made the polenta. The test was to make six perfect cannolis. A couple of the chefs couldn’t count, and put less than six in the box. Honestly though, I’m like, who cares what they look like, or how many there are, give me one of those. Gordon told Newton that his cannolis were rough around the edges, but had great filling, much like old Newt himself. Brien went home because he doesn’t know how to spell his name, and his cannolis were a mess. He left his apron graciously, and said he’s taking this as a learning experience. Next time, the MasterChef reigning master champ will be conjuring up a mystery box, and a mysterious ingredient pushes some cooks to their breaking point. I can’t even imagine.

CamelWednesday

July 19, 2017 – Finn is Cleared & the NYC Wives Invade Mexico

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Julian rings Alexis’s doorbell. She says she’s working on a new case. He hopes she has time for one more, but she says she’s not representing him. He’s no asking her to; he wants her to be a witness.

Hayden is proud of Finn, and wants to celebrate. He tells her that the townhouse he was buying fell out of escrow. He’s found another one, but they have to move fast. Griff appears and says assuming he passes the next drug test. Finn says they already proved the others were tampered with. Monica joins them, and says that she wants to have a serious talk with Finn.

At the Crimson office, Nina tells Nathan that the Man Landers interview is being edited. He says he’s getting in deeper and deeper. He asks if she’s keeping her promise to stay away from Valentin. She says she is, but he’s not staying away from her; he told her he’s pulling out all the stops. Nina tells Nathan that he’s starting with this, and shows him some paperwork. He says a nursing home for horses; Valentin knows how to win her heart back. He asks if it’s working.

Charlotte says she’s not hungry, but if she gets more ice cream, she and Valentin don’t have to leave.

Laura calls Dante and tells him that Spencer has disappeared. Dante thinks it’s not that unusual. He says Lulu told him that Spencer has taken off a lot. Laura says he’s been aggressive about wanting to get his inheritance back from Valentin, and that’s what has her worried. She thinks Valentin would like nothing better than for Spencer to disappear.

Julian tells Alexis that he wants her to tell the truth, and nothing but.

Monica looks all serious, and says according to his latest test results… Finn is okay. His test was negative, and he’s vindicated her faith in him. She did that thing like they do on the competition shows, acting like the results were horrible, when he’d really won the prize. Finn is wanted in the conference room. Monica congratulates him on being officially reinstated.

Nina tells Nathan that she might be able to entertain the idea of giving Valentin a second chance, but only if he can put the past in the past, and create a future with her and Charlotte. He asks if she told Valentin that, and she says she told Nelle. He says that’s worse; she’s just trying to convince herself. Nina says sometimes people do terrible things, and Obrecht enters her office, saying even she’s capable of indiscretions. Nina adds, sometimes before her morning coffee. Obrecht says no one is beyond redemption. She wants to discuss something with Nina privately, and Nathan leaves.

Nina tells Obrecht that she heard what happened. Obrecht says she’s glad to be rid of GH.

When Finn gets to the conference room, there’s a surprise party for him.

At the station, Laura explains everything to Doc, and tells him about Valentin’s court order. She also tells him that Spencer is missing. Dante says with any luck, someone saw him. Laura says he would have told Chandler if he was going somewhere. Dante asks if he’s that considerate, and Doc says, no, that thorough. Laura says it has to be Valentin, and tells Dante about the altercation at the park. Dante says that doesn’t mean anything, and she tells him about lawsuit. Doc says at the least, he’ll suffer public humiliation, and at worst, be wiped out. Laura says it’s clear he wanted it to go away.

Valentin tells Charlotte that they never have to be apart again. They can even petition the court again, and she could come back to Windemere to live. He says Spencer is a troubled young man, but it’s not okay for him to take his unhappiness out on her. She won’t be seeing him anymore. Valentin sees an Amber Alert for Spencer on his phone.

Alexis tells Julian that she’ll go to jail if she lies, and there’s no proof about Olivia-J threatening her. Julian says that he took bullet so Alexis could walk away. She says Leo could tear this apart on the stand, but Julian thinks a jury will buy it. He says if she testifies, she’ll be risking everything, and has nothing to gain by lying, so they’ll believe her. She says it’s not a good argument, but a huge stretch. The only way she’ll do it is if he testifies too. She makes him swear on a Bible. Like that means anything to him.

Finn tells Monica that her bedside manner is worse than his. She toasts to his courage. She says they look out for each other, but today they’re here for him. He thanks each of them for giving him a second chance, but says wouldn’t be on the planet if not for Hayden. Elizabeth says that in his honor, they’ve raided the vending machines.

Nina tells Obrecht that they already have a medical column, but Obrecht isn’t suggesting anything fluffy. She wants to write a serious scholarly report on medical research. Nina thinks a medical journal would be best for her work. Obrecht says that Nina has no place for her, and why should her talents be appreciated there when they were dismissed by the hospital? Nina says she’ll call around and find an opportunity that’s a better fit for her talent. Obrecht says that’s surprisingly kind. She’ll think about it while she collects her final paycheck, and then goes off to the cow pasture. While Nina ponders this, music from the Planet Terror soundtrack is played. I’m not kidding. I’ve seen that movie a thousand times.

Nathan calls Nina and asks her to come to the station. He needs to talk to her about Spencer.

Valentin suggests that he and Charlotte go to Windemere and feed the horses. Laura and Doc enter the restaurant and ask if Charlotte is having a nice visit. She tells them about going to feed the horses. Dante comes in, and says before they go, he needs to ask Valentin some questions. Valentin says he has a court order for visitation, but Dante says that it’s just a few questions about something else. Valentin tells Charlotte to stay, and if he’s not back in time for them to go to Windemere, they’ll see the horses next visit. Charlotte asks Laura if this is because of Spencer.

At the station, Nathan asks Nina about Spencer coming to Windemere. She tells him about going to get her jewelry, and the door being unlocked. She found Spencer inside, and says he was trying to get proof that the estate was his, but only found a copy of the will saying it was left to Valentin. After that, he seemed more determined than disappointed. Nathan asks if it seemed like he intended further action. Nina says not that night, but before. He came to her office, and demanded Windemere back. She explained that it was Valentin’s, and he wanted to contact him, but Laura and Doc arrived. Nathan asks if she thinks Spencer is capable of acting on his own. She says yes, but all Nathan knows is that he’s disappeared.

Hayden tells Elizabeth to pinch her because everything is going so well. When she does, Hayden is like, hey, and Elizabeth says she told her to do it. Elizabeth admits to being just a little jealous. Hayden says she thought Elizabeth was happy with Franco. Elizabeth says she is, but it will never be normal, not that it’s necessarily a bad thing. She tells Hayden that she deserves some calm for sticking by Finn. Griff gives a toast, saying the day has been a long time coming. He talks about how the guest of honor has been misunderstood. They broke the rules, but is someone that GH couldn’t live without. Obrecht overhears, and for a moment, thinks the party is for her. She walks in.

Alexis questions Julian. He talks about Olivia-J’s machinations, but Alexis says that was after. What about before he grabbed Alexis on the pier and held a knife to her throat? He asks if she remembers him asking his sister if he hadn’t done enough. Alexis remembers, and also remembers Olivia pretending to be an AA sponsor. She says she remembers how Julian didn’t warn her, not even a little hint. Julian says that if she’d known, she would have acted differently, and if Olivia had realized, she would have sliced Alexis’s throat open for real. He begged Alexis not to use her as a sponsor. She’d already almost killed Sam and Scout. Alexis asks if there’s anyone who can corroborate that; there’s no evidence to the contrary. He says he doesn’t have a witness, but he does have proof.

Monica asks Obrecht if they can help her, and she runs out. Hayden follows, saying she’s glad Obrecht came. She asks if Obrecht thought she was getting a gold watch, and says she’s lucky she’s not in prison.

Charlotte tells Doc and Laura about Valentin saying that Spencer is troubled, and that he misses his father, but shouldn’t be taking it out on her. And he told her that she won’t be seeing Spencer anymore.

Nina asks what Valentin is doing at the station. He says he has no idea. Dante tells him that Spencer disappeared from the park, and according to Laura, Spencer told Charlotte that Valentin had killed his father. Nina says he had no right to pick on Charlotte. Valentin says Spencer is a child, which gives him leeway, but he’s unhappy with the grown-ups who have indulged him. He’s a bully and a precocious jerk, which is what he told Laura.

Julian hands Alexis the letter that he’d left for her, and tells her to read it again, so they can enter it into the record. She reads about Olivia-J’s threats, and that he had one mission, to protect his family. Julian starts to recite the letter, saying that he never stopped loving her. He tells her that the defense rests. A tear rolls down her cheek.

Hayden gives Obrecht her severance pay. Obrecht asks if Hayden has any idea what she’s achieved. Hayden says she’s a magnificent healer. She looked at Obrecht’s file, and says she has amazing skill and vision. Obrecht asks why then? Hayden says she also took a good look at her background, and she’s like two people – one willing to help others, and the other willing to destroy them. She has to go, the sooner the better. Obrecht says it won’t stop her. Finn comes out to check on Hayden, and Obrecht says how chivalrous. She asks where his sense of honor and duty was when he was injecting himself while attending to patients. He tells her that he owned up to his mistakes, and now it’s her turn. He has a chance to have a future. Obrecht laughs, saying he’s as sanctimonious as Griff, but at least Griff is easy on the eyes. Finn admits Griff is handsome. Hayden tells Obrecht to take her severance pay and go.

Laura asks what Charlotte thinks her poppa meant. Charlotte says Spencer hurts her feelings, so she doesn’t have to see him anymore. Laura wants to take her home, but she wants to wait. Doc says it might take a while, and she asks why.

Dante tells Valentin that he might want to consult a lawyer. Valentin says that he would never harm a child, and Dante brings up the lawsuit. Valentin tells him that Alexis is exploiting a child with a suit that has no merit, but Dante says maybe he sees Spencer as something to be removed. Dante asks Nina what she thinks, and Nina tells him it’s bad police work, rushing to judgement with no witnesses or evidence. Nathan says someone saw a child being dragged from the park. When Dante asks if there was a description, Nathan says him, nodding at Valentin.

Alexis tells Julian that the letter is convincing. Julian says she knows it’s true, but she says knowing and convincing are two different things. She asks why he left her, and why he didn’t find her after he fell from the bridge? He says it was the only way to protect her. If the police had known, she would have been charged as an accomplice, and he didn’t want to implicate her. She asks why didn’t he stay dead, instead of dragging her into his dysfunction. Julian tells her that he knew he had to see her again, and she wanted it too. She says a jury isn’t going to be amused. He says he’ll take that chance as long as she’s willing. The doorbell rings. It’s a process server. Alexis says that she’s been summoned to be witness for the prosecution.

Finn thanks everyone especially Hayden. He promises she won’t regret it. Monica says welcome back to GH, now get back to work. Finn gets a call, and tells Hayden they’ll be looking at a house after his shift. They kiss.

Obrecht goes to her office, and sees her things packed. She opens her laptop, and uses Spyder Finder to look up Finn. She says what’s the point? She’s already dug up his less than spotless past, and besides, there’s a more effective method to make him pay. She puts Hayden/Rachel’s name in the search engine.

Laura tells Charlotte that Dante probably needed help on a case. Doc says he does it all the time, but it takes a while, so maybe she should go to Dante and Lulu’s. Laura says they’ll make sure her poppa knows. Charlotte says that no matter what it takes, he always comes back.

Valentin swears he had nothing to do with it. He drops a paper. It’s Spencer’s notes on Hamlet. Dante asks why he has it, and Valentin says there’s a simple explanation. (Isn’t it always?) Dante arrests him.

Tomorrow, Lucy has the keys to Finn and Hayden’s dream house, Laura needs Sonny’s help, and Hayden asks Obrecht why she’s still at the hospital.

The Real Housewives of NYC

We’re in Mexico! Bethenny has the flu, but she cancelled the last trip because of health issues, so she’s going this time. She says Ramona looks like the Bride of Frankenstein, since she decided they have a chemical peel five minutes before the flight. Carole wants to go to Taco Bell, and I’m hoping they don’t really have those there. The ladies play marry-shag-kill in the limo to the hotel. Adam and Scott (Tinsley’s blind date) are off on a guy’s trip to Vegas. Tinsley says their first date lasted five days; they ended up going to Miami. Sonja tells them she got her first d*ck pic, but it was a wrong number. Bethenny thinks that’s the best, and I agree. I wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of that pic, but it’s funny when it happens to Sonja.

No surprise, the villa is fabulous. Even Bethenny is impressed. I’m sure Ramona will be complaining in, three…two…one. Bethenny says she wants the trip perfect. It almost didn’t happen so many times, she’s excited now. Dorinda doesn’t care what room she gets, saying she’ll sleep on the lawn. Ramona tells Sonja that they got the worst room in Miami, so she has to speak up this time. Ramona is such an immature jerk. A small buffet has already been put out, and oddly enough, their chef’s name is Ramona. Bethenny says they’re going to do the rooms fairly, and is annoyed that Ramona and Sonja are already scoping out the rooms. When they appear, she tells them they’re not playing the room game, and that nobody acts like this except for them. In her interview, she calls Ramona a grabber. We flash back to Ramona being grabby. She says Sonja isn’t much better; she’s an accomplice.

Bethenny makes the girls pick room numbers from a bowl. Tinsley says she won, and jumps up and down, so I assume she got the most coveted room. Ramona thinks she’s going to be stuck in the shed. Bethenny says karma’s a bitch, and she always shows up – even in Mexico. Ramona tries to get Tinsley to share, but Tinsley gives the room to Bethenny. Ah-ha! (In Nelson voice.)

Ramona is pissed off because Tinsley is staying with Sonja for free, and didn’t give her the room. What a couple of selfish twits. Bethenny sees Ramona and Sonja’s bags in her room, and says get them out. Sonja bitches to Tinsley about giving Bethenny the room. Bethenny tells her this isn’t bringing out the best in her. I have to add that all of the rooms are gorgeous. Carole says the both of them have zero self-awareness. They have no idea what they look like, and maybe don’t care. Ramona continues to act like a moron, asking if they can’t share or whatever. Dorinda has to explain the word lottery to her. Sonja doesn’t want any room that involves going up stairs. In her interview, Carole suggests not drinking so much, and you won’t have to worry about falling down – it’s not that complicated. Ramona continues to berate Tinsley, who says Bethenny planned the trip, and deserves the room.

Ramona and Sonja try to take Dorinda’s room next, and Dorinda asks Bethenny to help mediate. Bethenny wonders if this is normal behavior for grown women, and says, enough; Dorinda switched rooms for them last time. You get what you get and don’t get upset. Tinsley tells them to quit coming at her and being bitchy. Bethenny asks if Sonja would accept her daughter acting like this, and Sonja says no, but she wouldn’t act like this. Bethenny reminds Ramona that Dorinda has been a good friend to her, yet she trashed Dorinda’s place, and calls them room bullies. Ramona is in Dorinda’s bed, and Dorinda tells her to get out or she’s going to throw her stuff in the pool. Bethenny tells Dorinda that Ramona is neither a good nor happy person. Sonja and Ramona gripe all the way to their unwanted room.

As soon as Sonja gets her luggage in the room, Ramona decides to switch rooms. She harasses the guy who helped with her luggage because she’s too tired to unpack. She gives him a bunch of orders for the morning. Holy! Ramona is the worst.

Bethenny tells Carole to enjoy the water while she tries to break her fever. Carole has brought mustaches for everyone. Dorinda says they’re going to play the balloon game, and explains it to Carole, saying they play it in Britain all the time. That explains why I saw it on Ladies of London. Two people try to break a balloon between their bodies, and the team that breaks the most balloons, wins. Dorinda demonstrates on Carole, who calls it a drunk game.

By the pool, Dorinda wonders if Sonja and Ramona are still mad at them. Luann says it should be the other way around. Tinsley talks about how she got lambasted for not giving them the room. Luann rouses Dorinda out of the chaise lounge to go choose their outfits for dinner. Ramona and Sonja are sitting on the beach, and Tinsley thinks Sonja is angry, judging by her body language. In her interview, Carole says she thinks Tinsley is suffering from Stockholm Syndrome, and identifying with her captor.

Ramona goes blah-blah-blah to Sonja about how friendships come and go, but Sonja will be in her life forever. Back at the pool, Bethenny says that Ramona brings out the worst in Sonja. They even had two shots at the lottery. Ramona tells Sonja she’s in a good place, and let’s live in the moment. In her interview, Sonja says she’s trying to concentrate on what Ramona is saying, but she looks like a pizza pie. They kiss, and everyone by the pool is like, eww!

Dinner is at seven, it’s eight thirty, and Bethenny is the only one there. Ramona and Sonja are perusing their shoes. Tinsley got an email from someone who said Page Six is doing a story about her not being grateful to Sonja, and it’s not what she needs right now. We flash back, and it sure sounds like Ramona encouraged that story. Sonja tells Ramona that Tinsley is intimidated by Bethenny, and she’s been on her to be more loyal.

Bethenny checks on Carole and Tinsley to hurry them along. She thinks Page Six is stupid, and no one will care anyway. Bethenny asks when Tinsley is moving, and Tinsley hopes it’s soon. Luann shows up at the table. Carole says she usually can’t tell when Luann has had too much to drink, but tonight something is definitely going on. Dorinda has chosen to hole up in her room. Carole calls Sonja, who asks what time dinner is. Sigh. Bethenny says that Ramona trying to put make up on is like throwing an extra deck chair off the QE2. No clue what that means, but Carole finds it amusing.

Carole tells the group about Page Six running the item about Tinsley being ungrateful. Luann wonders who put that out there. Sonja and Ramona finally show up, insisting they’re almost two hours late because their room is so far away. Luann makes a toast to the trip, and thanks Bethenny. Ramona gripes about the toast, and Bethenny asks why she’s an animal. Ramona claims that she’s just being real. Bethenny says that’s interesting, since she needs to own all her stuff. Tinsley brings up Page Six, and Sonja acts ignorant. Tinsley asks who’s talking, and Ramona insists she avoids the press. Carole points out it’s the exact same thing Ramona said to Tinsley the last time they were together, and Tinsley says she doesn’t need this BS. Carole says that Sonja gives Page Six a lot of stories, and Sonja suddenly tries to change things that she’s said. She says who cares, and Tinsley says she does, and tells Ramona to STFU. Ramona wants to know if they’re in high school. That’s rich coming from her. Tinsley gets riled about being called inconsiderate, and Ramona changes what she just said. Almost every one of the Housewives thinks that we have short-term memory loss. In her interview, Bethenny says Sonja loves the press, and thinks it has her name written all over it. Luann has to re-collect herself in a major way, and steps away from the table. At this point, Tinsley is in tears. Bethenny tells Sonja that her friend brings out the worst in her. Bethenny says that some people could never afford this kind of trip (I raise my hand), and the two of them are greedy. She says Sonja needs to change, or she won’t have any friends. Sonja admits to having a bad side, but thinks it’s an overreaction.

Luann and Ramona sit on the steps outside. Ramona says she knows she’s not normal, but the rest of them are acting crazy. She doesn’t believe Sonja put that in the press. Inside, Bethenny tells Sonja to quit blaming Ramona; it’s not a good look.

Luann does a booty shake, and starts to walk down the stairs. She suddenly takes a dive, and falls into the bushes. The two of them laugh hysterically. In her interview, Ramona says out of all of them, Luann holds her liquor the best, so she doesn’t know what happened. One of the staff plucks Luann out of the shrubbery.

Carole and Bethenny try to calm Tinsley down. Bethenny says Sonja doesn’t hear people talk; she just keeps talking. Sonja insists that no one is hearing her side.

Ramona tells Luann that she can’t do anything right by them. Luann takes another spill, and says that’s bad. Ramona bitches about no stairs being there, and gives several other reasons that Luann fell, except the one where she’s drunk off her ass. A staff member helps her to her room.

Ramona tells the others about Luann’s acrobatics. Carole wants Tinsley and Sonja to kiss and make up, but Tinsley says no. Ramona says Tinsley always screeches and it hurts her ears.

Next time, surfing, shopping, the trip to the distillery, and Ramona has it out with both Bethenny and Sonja.

Just Because…

Mexico

May 24, 2017 – Don’t Touch the Chimera, NYC Returns to the Berkshires & Two Times the Andy

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Sonny arrives at the Nurses Ball, and Ava wants to jet. He asks why she’s leaving when the party just started.

Lulu asks Josslyn if she’s nervous. She says she is, but keeps reminding herself it’s for a worthy cause. She thought that Carly had said Sonny wasn’t coming, and Carly says he must have changed his mind.

Jason finds the chimera necklace on the floor. Anna accosts Valentin about the Chimera Project. He sees Nina hug Curtis.

Charlotte asks if the Chimera martini shaker is part of the act. and what does it do?  Jake says it’s powerful magic. He tells Charlotte that it’s a surprise, and not to touch it.

In the hospital, Nelle stirs. Kiki asks if she needs anything. Barely conscious, Nelle says, Michael.

Sonny says he has a problem with everything Ava does, and a big one with what she did to Morgan. Scotty comes to her rescue, and escorts her back to the table. Dante asks Sonny what that was about.

Lulu tells Laura that Charlotte is going to be one of Jake’s assistants.

Vaelentin tells Anna that the Chimera is gathering dust where it’s not a threat. Anna, on the other hand, has been one to his marriage and his life. He slides into the seat next to Nina while Lucy talks.

Sam asks Jason what’s wrong, and he shows her the necklace.

Lucy asks if we’re ready for female trouble with a capital T. Emma, Valerie, Amy 2.0 and Kristina perform Brave. Emma is quite a young lady now. I can’t help wondering when they all practiced, especially Emma. It’s a hit. Lucy encourages everyone to bid in the silent auction.

Bobbie sits at Carly’s table. She’s surprised about Sonny showing up, but Carly says the cause is important to him.

Sonny tells Dante that Morgan is gone, and Ava is trading on his name to make herself look good.

Kiki calls Michael. She says she needs to talk to his grandmother. Nelle is doing okay, but could use a friend.

Jason asks Sam if she really thinks it’s a coincidence. Sam wonders if Jake brought it, and Jason says, who else? Who else, indeed. Like any one of five people.

Emma and Charlotte wonder how they can assist, when they can’t even touch the magic trick. Jake says no one else knows how the magic works – only him.

Anna calls Robert, and tells him how proud she is of Emma. She’s not calling about that though. She asks what the Chimera actually does. After he tells her (we don’t hear it), she wonders how it ever got created in the first place.

Valentin asks if Nina is going to ignore him. Curtis thinks he should go back to his own table. Valentin says not without his wife, and begs Nina not to shut him out.

Anna approaches Andre. He says he’s having a good time, and wants to keep it that way. She explains that the person who offended him was her sister.

Nina tells Valentin that she has nothing to say. Valentin says she’s right, the time for talking is over. He gets up.

Valentin goes to Lucy’s dressing room. She says she’s happy about his donation, but it doesn’t cancel out that he shot Doc. He says he wants to up his donation to seven figures. Lucy asks him in exchange for what?

Sonny isn’t going to stop until he finds out how Morgan died. Dante says they know. Sonny says explain the pills then, and tells him about the dosage difference. He says Andre checked with the pharmacy, and Morgan was given the correct dosage. He’s going to find out what happened. Meanwhile, Andre calls the lab.

Valerie forgot her lipstick, and Kristina gives her a commercial for Burt’s Bees. Valerie says it’s perfect, and Kristina says it moisturizes as well. It is nice stuff.

Jason asks Elizabeth where Jake is. He shows her the necklace. Elizabeth wonders if someone gave it to him. No, he bought it himself. Geez. Jake asks what’s going on, and if they’re talking about him.

Valerie asks Jordan and Curtis if they’re enjoying the night, and Jordan compliments her on her performance. When she’s gone, Curtis tells Jordan that’s one way to show you’ve moved on. He tells Nina he hopes she took notes, because she needs to move on from Valentin. She’s not sure she wants to.

Lucy says Obrecht is unable to perform. We hear something that sounds like a bunch of pots and pans clattering backstage. She says they have someone just as rich…er, good. Valentin says this is for his wife, because he loves her. He sits at the piano. She’s mesmerized, and so am I. I can’t tell if it’s really him playing, but if not, they did a nice job with editing that. He sings Billy Joel’s And So It Goes. If Nina doesn’t want him, I’ll take him. Lucy introduces Valentin after the fact, and thanks him. Her dresses are fantastic – kind of nude, with lots of sparkles in strategic places. Now that song is going to be stuck in my head all day.

Anna leaves, and Nina tries to follow. Curtis stops her, and tells her not to do this to herself; it’s not worth it. Anna asks Valentin to tell her what she needs to know.

Lulu (whose dress matches Charlotte’s) asks if Charlotte isn’t going to get ready, but she doesn’t think there’s going to be an act. Jason asks Jake if he’s seen the necklace before. He asks if it’s Jake’s, but Jake doesn’t say anything. He tells Elizabeth that he doesn’t feel good. Elizabeth asks if he just has stage fright, and Franco offers to go on stage with him. Elizabeth tells him that he doesn’t have to do what he doesn’t want to.

Dante tells Sonny that he has to talk to Ava and Lucy again. Sonny asks why Dante didn’t tell him that Ava was at The Floating Rib the night of the robbery. Dante says it could be a coincidence.

Carly wonders where Michael is. Josslyn tells her that Michael said something came up, and left. She jets before Carly can ask what came up.

Michael is at the hospital. Kiki tells him that Nelle asked for him. He pulls a chair next to her bed.

Dante says that when Ava’s name is mentioned, Sonny gets reckless. He suggests that Sonny and Ava stay away from each other. Sonny tells Dante he’ll be fine, and Lulu is probably wondering what happened to him. Dante goes back to his table, and Andre tells Sonny that there’s trace evidence of an inert substance in the pill bottle. It’s possible that the crumbled pill was a placebo. We won’t go over all the reasons that’s not how any of this works.

Valentin tells Anna, don’t. He says she and her sister have jeopardized everything he loves. Even worse, he let her, reverting back to what he was, a stuttering Richard III hunchback. He says the only things that matter are his wife and daughter, and if he ever mattered to her, let him alone.

Jake asks if Elizabeth is sure that he doesn’t have to perform; what I something bad happens? Elizabeth says the worst that can happen is they leave early, and everyone is cool with that. Jake is like, okay, no magic show.

Carly wonders what Sonny is doing there, and what he wanted with Ava. I’m totally distracted by Ava’s earrings; I want them so much.

Sonny says, Morgan was taking a placebo? and Andre says that would explain things. Sonny says someone set him up, tampering with his medication so he’d have a breakdown. And he’s going to find out who.

Ava is worried, but Scotty says he covered her tracks. No way is Sonny finding out.

Lucy says it’s a special thrill to introduce a newcomer.

Michael’s phone rings. He asks if it’s time. Josslyn asks why he thought it was a good idea. He tells her that his little sister is a rock star, and he wants everyone to know. He says he’s with her, and so is Nelle.

Lucy introduces Josslyn. Michael puts the phone on speaker. I don’t know the song (and couldn’t find it on Google), but the crowd goes wild. Sonny and Carly give each other a soap opera stare.

Franco says maybe Jake could perform at home. Elizabeth asks where the magic box is.

Charlotte says perhaps she and Emma can do the magic act. They open the box. She says they’ll start with the Chimera martini shaker.

Jason tells Sam that he didn’t like Jake’s reaction to the necklace. Sam wants to go home, but tells him to stay. Griff comes by, and asks if he’s seen Emma. He asks what Jason is doing with Anna’s necklace.

Anna says she understands that Valentin wants to leave past behind, but they’re jeopardizing the people they love. He tells her that the only person who knows about it, is dead. She asks who it is, and he says he sold it to Helena. Like this is a huge surprise.

Charlotte doesn’t know how to open the Chimera. She presses a button on it, and blue lights start flashing.

Nelle says that Michael missed Josslyn’s performance, but he says he just listened to it. He tells her that Josslyn backed him up in coming there.

Ava tells Scotty that she never meant for anything bad to happen; she just did it to protect Kiki. Scotty says doesn’t matter. Morgan is dead. Case closed.

Carly asks Sonny why he’s there. He tells her that he finally has answers about Morgan.

Tomorrow, more Nurses Ball, Valentin asks Lulu if there’s a problem, Scotty says Ava has to get out, Anna calls Robert, and Jake tries to stop the Chimera. I’m guessing that Obrecht is going to free herself from whatever closet Lucy and Valentin trapped her in, and it’s going to go off during her performance. Along with Lucy’s clothes coming off.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Ramona is downtown. Carole’s kittens hang from the curtains. Dorinda is packing for the Berkshires.

Bethenny meets with her real estate guy, Frederik Eklund. (Million Dollar Listing: New York premieres tomorrow.) He’s checking out the apartment that she’s getting ready to sell, and she says it’s bittersweet. Frederik lusts after her shoe collection. Me too. And the humongous closet the shoes are in. Frederick tells her they need to de-clutter de-personalize.

Ramona drops by Carole’s place. She starts moving things around on the coffee table, and critiquing Carole’s way of placing things. I’d smack her. They talk about Dorinda’s party, and Luann’s upcoming wedding. Carole says Tom acts more like the bride than Luann.

While walking the dog, Tom and Luann discuss a honeymoon. She suggests South Africa. In her interview, Luann says she loves being married. She’s trying to get used to saying “our” again. Tom complains about gaining weight.

Carole tells Ramona that she thinks Luann is having second thoughts. She says that someone told her that all is not as it seems. We revisit the scene where Barbara is telling Carole that she thinks Luann would rather go through with it and get divorced later. Which, btw, Barbara is seriously miffed about, since she claims she didn’t know it would be on the show. Please. Barbara must be a full-blown idiot. Carole says maybe Luann is just having last minute jitters, but thinks the conversation should be had. Ramona says that she got a text from someone who used to date Tom, and he recently tried to be sexually aggressive with her. She called Tom a “dirty dog,” and said she didn’t think she was the only one he’s groping. Carole wonders if Luann cares. Ramona asks if they’re bad friends if they don’t tell her – or if they do tell her. She reminds Carole about what happened in Miami. We flash back to that, and she says it’s not just one kiss. Carole says maybe Luann is confiding in Dorinda, and Ramona thinks they should talk to her.

It’s Christmas in the Berkshires again. Dorinda messes with some giant balls (hush) that light up. We flash back to the last holiday dinner there, when Dorinda made it nice. She’s going to be more strategic this time, and invite the women in different groups over the course of three days. And yes, Sonja is invited this year.

Sonja thinks she’s cool because she’s in the first group and “invited early.” She arrives with Ramona. Tinsley is also coming after meeting her mother for lunch.

Tinsley’s mother asks if she’s happy in NYC. She’s brought Tinsley’s father’s ashes because she’s taking them to Florida, and Tinsley might want to say good-by. I would have hoped Tinsley had done that already, since he’s been gone for two years. Tinsley gets a drink from the mini-bar. She talks about her mother’s hugs being relative to her weight as a child, and in her interview, says that Southern mothers are particularly critical of their children. They talk about Sonja. Tinsley’s mother hopes Tinsley is appreciative, since Tinsley is sponging off of her.

Sonja complains about Tinsley not making coffee and excluding her when she goes out. Dorinda says she knows a lot about Tinsley’s past, but not who she is today. She thinks Tinsley needs to open up, and hopes over time that she trusts them more.

Tinsley’s mom wants her to have a baby, but Tinsley says she’s not just going to pluck some random guy out. They talk about Tinsley’s dating life.

Dorinda wants the girls to help decorate. She takes her tree seriously, and says it’s a religion. She gives detailed instructions on how the lights should be placed.

Adam’s parents, David and Lola, are in town, and Carole is accompanying them to find Christmas presents for Adam. In her interview, Carole says it didn’t take her two minutes to win Lola over, and parents love her. She says they want grandkids, and Adam wants kids, but she’s not going to be the one having them, since she’s 200 years old. She says what it means for the relationship is still to be determined. David acts exhausted, even though he hasn’t done anything except go along for the ride.

Tinsley gets to the Berkshires. In her interview, she says her mother told her you can never have enough Christmas decorations, but she thinks Dorinda is secretly Mrs. Claus. She does have a lot of them. Sonja picks on Tinsley for having lunch elsewhere. Tinsley keeps explaining that it was her mother.

It’s Dorinda’s birthday. She wants to show Tinsley her cake, but even though it says, “open here,” it’s the wrong side, and the cake has toppled. Dorinda says, enough wine, and the cake will be beautiful. Amen, sister!

Bethenny tells the driver no hookers, because they might have to peel out at midnight. She and Carole act like five-year-olds walking in, but Carole says she thinks the third time is the charm. Dennis has sent Bethenny flowers at Dorinda’s because he knows she needs floral therapy in the Berkshires. She’s just hoping Ramona leaves her alone.

Carole talks to Bethenny alone about Luann. Bethenny wonders if there’s any way they can get her out of it. Luann obviously doesn’t care or doesn’t want to know, so I’m not sure why these women keep wanting to get involved. Unless Andy Cohen is standing there with a pitchfork. I used to think Jeff Probst was the antichrist until Andy came along.

Bethenny says it was reliable information last year, and the same source has it that Tom is straying again. Carole says Bethenny is like the cautionary tale for a whirlwind romance. Bethenny agrees, but says hers wasn’t as bad at this point in time. Bethenny wants to be on a group tag team to tell Luann, as she was on her own in Miami.

Omg, Dorinda has a fat little dog named Lucy who is just precious. The ladies mess with the fireplace, and try to burn down Dorinda’s house by not opening the flue. They sit down for drinks, and Dorinda says that Luann is rock solid about getting married. Carole says she’s heard differently. Ramona says she doesn’t want Luann to be the last to know. In her interview, Dorinda wishes they could talk about someone else. Ramona reads the texts she received. Dorinda hopes they’re taking it the wrong way. Bethenny says the cracks become craters. She says her situation didn’t even start the same way, and look how it ended up. In her interview, Dorinda says she doesn’t want to hear it, but now she’s obligated to say something, so Luann can either leave, stay, or shoot someone. She asks the other women to be with her because she’s afraid.

Dorinda thinks all she’ll get is anger, but Carole says she’s being a good friend. Luann arrives while the ladies are setting out the materials for cookie decorating. Bethenny asks about Luann’s dress, and if she’s all set. Luann talks to Tinsley about finding her own place. Tinsley says Sonja talks smack behind her back, and Luann says welcome to the club. Tinsley tells the ladies that she can’t even talk to Sonja’s assistant without it being a problem. Sonja says she can’t have him doing errands, and she has to treat him professionally. Tinsley claims that she only asked him once to take a package for her. Ramona tells her to face it, she can’t do anything right. Sonja makes up stupid scenarios that could have happened if her assistant dared open the door for Tinsley’s delivery. No way would I live with this woman. No wonder Tinsley ditches her.

Bethenny tells Carole that she’s glad Ramona is keeping her distance. She thinks everyone told Ramona how foolish she looked, and she’s trying to make up for it.

In private, Dorinda tells Luann the saga continues. She asks if Luann is happy, and if she believes Tom is done with other women. She tells Luann about the texts, and says she wanted to come to her directly. She asks if Luann trusts Tom. Luann says she trusts him 100%. She says they don’t check each other’s phones, and Dorinda admits to checking John’s phone, as well she should. Luann says she doesn’t care what anyone says. Dorinda tells her that as long as she doesn’t feel like she’s being pressured, it’s all good. In her interview, Dorinda says at the end of the day, it’s Luann that has to handle this. Luann wonders if the women don’t have anything better to do, and thinks they’re talking about her because they’re missing something in their own lives.

Luann tells Dorinda that Ramona has been calling Tom’s friends, trying to dig up dirt, and poof! Ramona appears.

Next time, two weeks until the wedding, Carole wonders why all these women want to kiss Tom, Bethenny refuses to make a toast, and Ramona and Bethenny have it out.

🎉 Tonight, Andy Cohen’s Then & Now covered 1990. George Michael’s Freedom video, supermodels, Vogue! The Fly Girls (whose inspiration was part hip-hop, part Ann Margaret), Nelson Mandela’s release, more realistic family sitcoms, Married with Children and Terry Rakolta, Twin Peaks, the first war live on TV (the Gulf War), Home Alone, and Sinead O’Connor shaving her head. The twist on this retrospective show, is that all of the main topics covered are tied to how they’ve influenced today. I like this show almost as much as CNN’s decades series. The biggest revelation this evening? RuPaul finds Ed O’Neill sexy.

🏖 Watch What Happens Live has been blessed with a few of the Beverly Hills Wives stopping by since they’re filming in LA this week. Lisa Vanderpump stopped by the other night with a batch of puppies and I almost passed out. Erika Jayne  dropped in tonight, and Kyle Richards also did a bit with Andy at the beginning of the show. Guest Bethenny Frankel was a hoot, spilling the tea where she could, and joining her, Eric Stonestreet was just delightful. James Kennedy (Vanderpump Rules) has been the house DJ, and Andy brought along the Gay Shark, who has acquired rainbow swim trunks for his trip to the West Coast. Tomorrow, Chelsea Handler is on. I’ll be watching, but she’s not a favorite of mine. I liked her original show when it first aired, but I saw her change over time, becoming more mean than funny. God forgive me, but I was glad when she cried over Hillary losing the election.

 

May 17, 2017 – Anna Has a Twin, Dorinda Hosts an Event, OUAT News, 1985 & an Opinion

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Carly tells Bobbie no way. She’s not hiring Scotty. She’s not that desperate. She says she’ll go from suing for divorce to death row in no time. Bobbie tells her that he does know his way around a courtroom.

Martina shows up at Sonny’s to say good-by.

Griff tells Michael it’s a good thing he was there to tell them Nelle only had one kidney.

Dante arrives home to find Charlotte playing with Rocco. Lulu says life is full of happy, unexpected surprises. I wonder when I’ll get one of those.

Valentin tells Nina that he promised when they took him away in handcuffs that he’d be back, and he was. Now he promises to put things back together. Nina says, until Anna comes back, and he says she’s not coming back.

Anna begs Sister Caroline for help. Dr. Lancaster asks what’s going on; he heard voices. He wants to know if “Alex” regained consciousness. Caroline says it was only her voice he heard; she was trying to get Alex to relax, since her heart rate was up. The doctor says if she becomes agitated or regains consciousness, call him immediately. Caroline says she always follows his instructions to the letter. As she closes the door, she says, except now. She asks Anna what’s going on.

Nina tells Valentin that Anna is a lying bitch who played on his vulnerabilities, but it doesn’t change that he lied to her. He says he hates himself, and they can’t not fix this. He’ll get her to trust him again. Nina says she can’t. He says maybe it all came too easy after a lifetime of sitting on the sidelines. He was afraid it would get taken away. She says it doesn’t matter any more. He tells her that if she’s worried he and Charlotte are going to leave her, they’re not. They both love her, and he’s going to spend his life convincing her. She tells him not to worry about her; worry about Charlotte.

The kids go to brush their teeth, and Dante asks Lulu how they got a sleepover. Lulu says she’s not sure Valentin knows. Nelle went AWOL, and the school couldn’t reach him, so they contacted her. Dante says Nina was vocal about Lulu not getting extra time, but Lulu says they couldn’t get her either. She tells Dante she isn’t sure Nina is going to be in the picture much longer. She got the impression that the marriage is over.

Michael asks Griff how Nelle is doing, but he doesn’t know much yet.

Andre is on the phone at the bar. He asks when the pharmacist will return from his family emergency. His patient’s family is depending on his cooperation in this matter.

Martina going back to Atlanta. Mission not accomplished, and she sees no point staying. Sonny gives her a drink, and says happy landings. She says bumpy ride so far. She hates leaving it like this, and he asks if she’s going to miss him. She says she’ll miss finishing what she started; she had him. The initial report just scratched the surface of his colorful life. He toasts to her being off the case, and Martina adds, and Carly not being the wiser.

Carly can’t figure it out. She thinks the conflict of interest with Martina is a cover-up. Bobbie says Sonny’s holdings are complex. Carly says they were holding hands. Bobbie tells her to use her time to find a new lawyer. She knows Carly is overwhelmed, but the only way through it is to keep on moving or she’ll get stuck in bitterness and hatred. She tells Carly get off her butt, and stop raging about Sonny. She says to stop beating around bush and get a divorce.

Martina tells Sonny that he has a lovely home, and good luck holding onto it. He says he’s good at holding on to things. She supposes Ava is neutralized. She says both he and Carly seem to despise her equally, and Sonny calls Ava a vicious snake. Martina wonders why Ava wouldn’t still use the information about them against him, but Sonny says she’s found it’s better to work with him than against him. Martina says it’s too bad that he and Carly can’t come to the same understanding.

Bobbie asks Carly why she’s using the tactic of holding on to Sonny’s assets, and Carly brings up Jax getting deported. Bobbie asks if she’s the karma police, and Carly says he has to pay. Bobbie says that she deserves peace and happiness, and she’s not going to get that from hurting Sonny. In the long run, Sonny won’t be the one hurt. Bobbie talks about the kids and how it’s taking a toll on them. Carly says she doesn’t want them going through that pain, and Bobbie tells her to make a clean, quick break, and put it in the rearview mirror.

At the hospital. Michael asks if he can see Nelle. The nurse says she’s not awake. He says maybe she’ll wake up if she sees someone cares about her. The nurse tells him she has to check on lab results – wink-wink. He thanks her, and when she’s gone, goes in to see Nelle, who is all hooked up to tubes and machines.

Nina tells Valentin what happened with Charlotte. He asks why she didn’t take Charlotte back to Windemere, and she says it’s not her home anymore. He asks if she thought making her point was more important than Charlotte, and she says that she thought she shouldn’t get into a fight with Lulu. She says she loves Charlotte, and would never do anything to harm her. Valentin says no matter how long it takes, he’s going to put their lives back together. She tells him to think of his daughter.

Dante reads Ferdinand to the kids. That was one of my favorites as a child. He realizes that they fell asleep. He’s surprised Lulu still awake, and she says she wouldn’t miss it.

Sonny tells Martina that he’s not looking for a war. Martina says she hopes he doesn’t end up finding one, and that he has the most to lose. He asks if he should he give Carly everything that’s his. He says Martina doesn’t know him, but she says she knows the road he’s headed down. He could lose everything; not just money, but his family, well-being, and sense of self. She says high profile divorce cases can be devastating. He says he already has a lawyer, and she asks if he’s set on friends. He says he’s not into absent friends (a toast!), and she says she’s not gone yet. As her first act of friendship, she says she’s returning this. It’s his wedding ring.

Griff gets Nelle’s test results. Carly walks in, yapping on the phone. He asks if she’s looking for Michael, and she says no, why?

Michael is busy talking to Nelle. He tells her she’s safe and at GH, and he’s going to see that she has the best care. He tells her he’s leaving, but won’t be far.

Anna sits up. Caroline comes in. She says not to get up. Anna doesn’t know where she is. Caroline tells her that she’s at Merrick Clinic, and she’s been there for two months. Anna says she has a blood disease, and Caroline says they know; the doctor has given her phlebotomy treatments. Anna doesn’t understand why she’s being held captive, but Caroline tells her not to exert herself. Anna says that Alex is her twin; they’re not close, and lead separate lives. I guess so. And I also guess I’m wrong about who fake Anna is. Dammit! They sure pulled that rabbit out of a hat. Caroline is confused. Anna asks why she’d need to be sedated all the time, and asks if Alex had a blood disease. When Caroline says no, Anna tells her to look up Anna Devane on the internet, and come back with a phone.

Lulu tells Dante that Charlotte asked for Nina and Valentin, and she told her she’d see them tomorrow. Dante says he’s glad she’s happy, but he’s waiting for the other shoe to fall. Lulu wonders what would keep Valentin from picking up Charlotte. The doorbell rings, and Dante says maybe they’re about to find out. Come on. Everyone had to have laughed when they read that the first time. Yep. Valentin is there for his daughter.

Martina tells Sonny that she found the ring while she was packing. She asks why he didn’t toss it overboard, and suggests he was hoping someone would find it. So if he got it back, he’d have to think twice about the divorce.

Nelle wakes up. Michael says he’ll get the doctor, but Griff is there already, and asks to speak privately with Nelle. Outside the room, Michael sees Carly. She says Griff told her about Nelle. He says she’s in bad shape, but would be worse if he hadn’t found her. Although she wouldn’t even be there if he hadn’t left.

Andre makes Nina a root beer float at the bar. She talks about loving them as a child when her father made them, and how she wasn’t close to him. She says that Valentin is a devoted father, but tells Andre that she can’t talk to him about it, since Anna is at the root of their problems. She asks how Anna bamboozled a smart man like him. How does she get smart, intelligent men to fall all over themselves, when all that’s there is a self-serving bitch who breaks up families? Andre says there’s more to her. Nina says there’s less. Take away the accent and manners, and she’s a cold blooded snake. He says that’s not the Anna he knows, and Nina says maybe he doesn’t know her.

Caroline comes back, but didn’t bring a phone. She says the doctor must have mistaken Anna for her sister. Anna says she was at her sister’s flat and blacked out. She thinks Alex drugged her. She says she doesn’t need to be sedated 24/7. She has to get out, and Caroline has to help her.

Lulu tells Valentin to come in, as long as he can be civil. She explains that she was the only available parent, and Valentin asks why she didn’t take Charlotte home. Lulu says Nelle never showed up, and she wasn’t going to leave her with the servants. Valentin says he doesn’t know what happened, but he just wants his daughter. Lulu says now he knows how she feels.

Michael tells Carly what happened on the docks. She says none of this is his fault. He asks whose fault is it? Everyone was wrong, but the only one who seems to be paying for it is Nelle.

Griff asks Nelle what she remembers. She says she was on the dock waiting for the boat, some guy tried to mug her, and she fought back. It’s the last thing she recalls. He tells her about Michael finding her, and says her kidney was bruised. He asks if she wants to see Michael.

Sonny tells Martina that he didn’t want to wear his ring during a one-night stand; end of story. She says it’s not her job to help him salvage a relationship he doesn’t want to salvage. He says that Carly did the unforgivable, and he just wants it over. Martina suggests he start by getting rid of the ring. She starts to go, but he doesn’t want her to leave.

Andre tells Nina that Anna is a complicated woman with complicated past. Nina says Valentin is part of that past. Anna took advantage of it, and now Andre is defending her. Andre tells Nina that what she has with Valentin is greater than what he imagined he had with Anna. They’ve moved on to real drinks.

Lulu tells Valentin that this was traumatic for Charlotte. They calmed her down, fed her, and she forgot about it. Dante asks if he wants to wake her up after all that. Lulu says she’s informing the social worker if he does, and already told her about everyone disappearing.

Anna tries to get up, and Caroline tells her not to exert herself. Anna says she has to go, and Dr. Lancaster appears. He says, on the contrary, and insists she stay.

Sonny asks Martina to stay. She says that he called her a one-night stand. He says that they have another night, and she tells him that she’s just distraction from mess he’s in. He says they’re good to go. They enjoy each other’s company, and she hasn’t left yet. They have time for one more act of friendship. Martina says maybe more than one. I refrain from the jokes in my head.

Carly tells Michael that she wouldn’t wish this on Nelle ever. She says sometimes it’s easier to be angry than afraid. Griff comes out, and Michael asks to talk to Nelle, but Griff says she doesn’t want to see him. Good.

Nina tells Andre about the first night she met Valentin. He was charming and unexpected, and if she had to do it over again, she would. He says in shrink speak, that’s an important realization. Nina says now she’s sitting here nursing a broken heart, but she’d do it again; she was happy, and saw how full her life could be. She saw herself, and she likes herself. As badly as Valentin screwed up, he got her there, and that’s a good thing. She says she thinks he knows she’s the best thing ever happened. He’ll regret Anna, and so will she

Lulu tells Valentin that she did everything by the book. Valentin says she thought of everything. She says that’s what a responsible parent does; now it’s his turn. He says he’ll be back in the morning, and she says she hopes he likes pancakes. He leaves, and Dante tells Lulu that he’s impressed.

Andre tells Nina that going after Anna isn’t going to serve her. She says Valentin knows she’s been manipulating him, and he’s not going to let her get away with it. She has to go, and Andre leaves Anna a message to call him back; trouble is coming her way.

Dr. Lancaster says he’ll deal with Caroline later, but they need to get “Alex” back to sleep. When he bends toward the bed, Anna stabs him in the neck with a syringe. She says the Sister has to help her to get out.

Tomorrow, Brad talks to Laura, Hayden wonders if she’s ready for a baby, and Valentin asks Lulu what game she’s playing.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Luann makes wedding plans, and Dorinda makes plans for a charity event, as well as Hannah moving out. She wants to spend some time being on her own. Bethenny goes furniture shopping with her. Bethenny has found an enormous apartment in Soho (and enormous is not an exaggeration), but hasn’t decided what she’s doing with it yet. Must be nice.

Ramona is shopping with Avery, who tells her she overdoes her coolness, and it looks like she’s trying too hard. Thank you. She wonders what’s underneath the fight with Bethenny. Ramona tells Avery how she presented the subject, and Avery – who is more mature than her mother – says it sounded like an attack.

Luann has lunch with Sonja. She talks about the awkwardness between Ramona and Bethenny. Sonja says Ramona is confrontational, and two taboo subjects are Bethenny’s kids and her business.

Bethenny tells Dorinda that she’ll be cordial, but she has enough reasons and history to know it’s not working with her and Ramona.

Ramona meets Tinsley for drinks. Sonja joins them. Tinsley is on the prowl, but isn’t sure if they’ll be the best wingwomen. Ramona orders something very complicated that involves as many glasses as ingredients, and gives Tinsley tips about getting the attention of men in bars. Be a woman. There you go. Ramona bothers the workers in the kitchen, then asks for a big straw for her drink. They check out some guys who look like they’re twelve.

Tinsley calls Sonja over. In her interview, Sonja says if Tinsley wants marriage and children, she needs to stick with the plan, and she’s veered off the highway. Ramona chats up a 12-year-old, and promotes Tinsley. He says he’s twenty-something, but I don’t believe it. Tinsley says she’s never seen women move faster in her life. I have news for her. This dude is not interested in Ramona or Sonja. She decides to stay behind, and Sonja tells her that’s a big mistake. His name is Chad, and he tells her he’s twenty-three. She pretends to fall off her chair, and they kiss.

The next morning, Sonja complains that Tinsley killed off a cutting from her plant. Tinsley asks if Sonja has sweetener, and Sonja tells her to steal it from restaurants. She asks when Tinsley came home, and Tinsley says she wasn’t going home with someone she just met. Sonja explains how a girl sometimes has to blow off steam, but not to get involved if they’re not on the list.

Bethenny is doing work for Be Strong’s breakfast at the Rainbow Room. They’ve combined with Dress for Success, and help women in crisis. Dennis joins her. In her interview, she says he was a fan of hers long before there were any others. She never thought about him as a boyfriend, so it was a major surprise and very romantic. Carole arrives. I’m surprised she’s still breathing after the election. Bethenny gets up to speak, and gets choked up. In her interview, Carole talks about how suckerfish Jason Hoppy won’t let go. Bethenny tells the women about her own crisis, and how she’s been inspired by them.

Carole and Adam go inside fake rock climbing, along with their friend Nina. Carole says that she and Adam are similar in a lot of ways, but not this one. He’s very athletic, and she’s not. She says he does get her out and doing stuff she doesn’t normally do, and that’s fine – to a certain extent. She climbs two feet up and says she’s done. Just kidding, she went further than I would have. Heights aren’t exactly my thing.

Nina asks Carole about the apartment situation. She says Adam found a place, but all of a sudden, the woman isn’t moving out. It looks like she’ll be sparing space for a while. She says they love each other and are together, but she doesn’t feel like it’s that relationship, and it’s hard to have the conversation while they’re living together.

Tinsley meets Chad for a date. She says he’s a little young, but she wants to have some fun. They go bowling. I guess their idea of fun is different from mine. She says she does want to get married eventually, but right now she feels like she’s twenty. Chad gets asked for his ID when they order a drink. Ugh. And I’m surprised. The drinking age was 18 when I moved to NYC, and I was only carded once. It was at a liquor store, and even then, the clerk just asked me how old I was. The funny thing was that I’d just had a birthday and gave him the wrong age. Tinsley is an excellent bowler, and they find out they both live on the Upper East Side. In her interview, Tinsley says if she wants to bring him home, she’ll have to sneak him in. Why do they have to go to her place? Does he live with his parents? Or six roommates?

Ramona, and friends Missy and Eileen, go for drinks. Ramona isn’t sure what she wants ultimately, and says that she’s enjoying being single. A secret admirer buys Eileen a drink. Ramona complains that he didn’t buy a round for their table. That would certainly be more impressive, but it’s not a requirement. Especially since drinks are like twenty bucks in Manhattan. Ramona spills the beans on all the women’s dating habits, and talks about Luann’s pending marriage. Eileen says she’s the only one who didn’t date Tom. In her interview, Ramona says Missy knows a lot. Eileen says she admires Luann for going all in, but Ramona thinks she’s putting her head in the sand. Missy says she found out that she and Tom weren’t dating anymore when she walked in on him and Luann in a bar. She’d thought they were exclusive. Bleh. Ramona says they have to support each other as women. I do too, but I can live without Ramona’s kind of support.

Luann discusses her wedding makeup with the friend who’s doing it. The wedding planning is taking up all of her time. She says Ramona had a snarky comment about people taking bets about the wedding happening, but for the most part, everyone has been cool. Not like, uncool.

Dorinda is having a charity event for Women for Freedom, which fights human trafficking. She and Carole have come up with items for an auction, and she’s panicking that people won’t bid. She says if no one else does, she will. The other ladies begin to arrive. Tinsley thinks that Bethenny is hot and cold; sometimes she’s super chatty, but then she doesn’t even get a hello. Bethenny has never met Tom, which is a surprise to all of us.

Dorinda thanks everyone for coming. She says it’s the year of giving back and gratitude, and encourages everyone to bid. Bethenny does an imitation of Ramona for Carole that’s spot on. In her interview, Dorinda says one good thing about the event is that it’s big, so people can avoid each other.

Bethenny meets a guy named Milos who she thinks would be good for Sonja. In her interview, Tinsley wonders what’s up with Sonja. When they’re alone, she’s like a mother figure or mentor, but acts like Tinsley is an annoying little sister out in public. Can you say competition? Bethenny tells Sonja about Milos, but she thinks he’s girlfriended up. Bethenny says that he claims to be unattached. Tinsley thinks she might be interested, but it’s too late, Ramona is already there. Sonja says Ramona is flirting on her potential. Some anonymous guy stares at the camera and looks really stupid. Really stupid.

Bethenny says no matter what, homegirl is going down the aisle, but it’s awkward. Luann thanks Bethenny for sticking up for her with Ramona. She says she doesn’t need anything negative. Tom asks what Bethenny is doing for the holidays. In her interview, Luann tells us that Bethenny apologized to him for what went down in Miami, and Tom was gracious and brushed it off.

No one is bidding. Dorinda says to tell the bartender to cut off the drinks until people make the rounds of the items. Bethenny gets an idea for charity whores. They’re similar to the girls who flirt to get men to buy champagne at strip clubs, but they get them to bid on things. Luann starts with a Givenchy bag. She’s glad there’s Christmas cheer at this Christmas party. Unlike last year when Sonja went bonkers over not being invited to the Berkshires. Carole has a conversation with a woman named Barbara, and they believe that Luann would rather get married and divorced than call it off, even though Tom is still playing around. In her interview, Carole says Luann is the great pretender and doesn’t want to be seen faltering.

Next time, Frederick from Million Dollar Listing: New York looks at a property with Bethenny, Carole and Ramona discuss Tom, Dorinda’s cake falls over, and Dorinda asks Luann if she trusts Tom.

🎢 Tonight, Andy Cohen’s Then & Now covered 1985. While personally that was quite a year for me, it was also a HUGE year for pop culture. Omg. Madonna, Madonna marrying Sean Penn, Blockbuster Video (be kind and rewind!), Wrestlemania (RIP Rowdy Roddy Piper), Howard Stern, Live Aid, Tipper Gore and offensive lyrics, Bernie Goetz, MORGAN FAIRCHILD! I also enjoyed Dee Snyder doing some commentary. He’s a very smart dude. Oddly, they didn’t mention the year being reviewed next time, but it’s when George Michael came out, Married with Children was popular, and Sinead O’Connor shaved her head. This is a fun show, and the hour just flies by.

⛹ If you’re a man and thinking of wearing a RompHim, a term which Andy Cohen actually coined quite some time ago – no. Just no. I’m begging you. I’d rather see a man bun, and I don’t want to see one of those – ever. And if you’re a woman and thinking of wearing a romper, please look in the mirror before you leave the house.

⚔ Both the bad and good news is that Once Upon a Time is moving to Friday nights next season. It’s good because it competes with other shows I like on Sunday, and at 8 pm, it won’t be competing with Z Nation on Friday. At least as far as I know. The bad news is, Friday night is usually a death knell for a big three network show. A few of the cast members are also leaving. You can read about it here:

http://www.eonline.com/news/850516/once-upon-a-time-is-moving-to-a-new-night-after-cast-shake-up-in-abc-s-fall-2017-schedule

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