Tag Archives: The Real Housewives of New York

June 8, 2016 – GH, Big Apple Little Women & Wives

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Sonny tells Ava that messing with Morgan is going to cost her. Sonny says he saw her name in the log book at the hospital and wants to know what she told Morgan. She says she’s trying to protect her daughter.

Andre is pleased with Morgan’s progress. He starts to tell Morgan that he’s ready for release and Morgan stops him. Morgan says he feels settled where he is and Andre asks if he thinks he’d be unsettled in the outside world. Morgan says it’s safe at the hospital.

Tracy walks in on Kiki and Dillon. Kiki says she has to jet, but she’s looking forward to their date. Tracy asks Dillon when this happened. Dillon says he’s a grown man and refuses to have this conversation with his mother. Tracy says she has more important things to discuss anyway – she wants photos of baby Edward in the rose garden. He says he’s happy to do it as long as she realizes she’s not baby Eduardo‘s mother, Sabrrrina is.

Paul and Anna start to question Sabrrrina when Michael comes in with a lawyer. Sabrrrina says she’s been advised of her rights and wants to talk. She thanks Michael, but says she knew she was breaking the law and wants to give her full cooperation.

Julian asks if Alexis is looking for the shirt that’s in his hand. D’oh! She’d better make something up quick. She says yep, that’s what she was looking for. She says she hated what he did so she held on to the evidence. He says that’s the most honest she’s been in days. He asks if she was going to turn him in and she says she changed her mind.

Sabrrrina says she knows what she did was wrong, but Carrrlos was her baby’s father and she thought she had nothing left in Port Charles. Anna asks if Carrrlos ever talked about Duke’s murder or Julian. Sabrrrina says he never discussed those things with her. Paul is disappointed.

Ava says Kiki was shot because of Morgan and she’s not letting it happen again. Sonny says the shooting was ultimately her fault. She says Morgan is bi-polar and has shown manic behavior. Sonny says he’s on his meds now and getting better. Ava says he wants Kiki to take care of him the way Carly takes care of Sonny. He says it’s not the same thing and Ava says he’s right, Carly is a ruthless bitch who will never leave Sonny as long as he has money, and Kiki isn’t equipped to deal with Morgan’s problems.

Andre tells Morgan he knows what happens when he doesn’t take his meds or go to therapy. Morgan says it’s better than it was in the beginning. He says he feels like an outsider and a freak though, so he thinks it would be better to stay there.

Julian asks why she changed her mind and Alexis says because of Lucas. She saw how he tended to his son and saw the man she fell in love with, and decided to destroy the shirt. Julian says how about they destroy it together? You know, one of those fun, bonding activities that couples do.

Sonny says he understands how bi-polar affects a person, but he also knows Morgan is better and thinks he and Kiki should decide what they want to do. He says because of Ava, Morgan struggled and crashed more, and that she played with his fears and insecurities. He says for Avery’s sake, he’s going to let her live, but if she keeps messing with his son, she won’t like how he retaliates.

Morgan says once he leaves, everything centers around how he manages his illness, and what if he messes up? Andre says everyone messes up and his best advice is for Morgan to embrace his future, and due to his hard work, he’ll have a future. He says they’ll establish a transition plan where he sees Andre privately. Andre says he’ll have a job and a social life and a whole lot more, and that’s his professional opinion.

Paul tells Anna he can’t risk letting Sabrrrina go. Anna says she has significant ties to Port Charles, starting with her child, and if they need her, she’ll cooperate.

Tracy says Sabrrrina aided and abetted a fugitive. Dillon says Michael has gotten her legal representation. Tracy says Edward needs a mother’s guidance and while she’s made mistakes, she’s not Medea. (No, that’s Helena – my own inside joke since I saw Constance Towers in Medea on Broadway. ) Dillon says Tracy was the perfect mother for him, just like Sabrrrina will be the perfect mother for Edward.

Julian says once the shirt is gone, this will finally be over. He’s about to put it in the fire and Alexis grabs it back. Julian says she was never going to destroy the shirt; she was going to give it to the cops and that’s why Diane was there. He says he’d hoped he was wrong, but she’s been lying to him this whole time. Alexis says, no, you.

She says he lied to her even before they were married. She says there’s no justification for any of it. He’s sworn he was out and did it for her and their children. She says instead he brought the mob into her life and their children’s lives. She goes on a little about all men being the same and Julian stupidly insists he did it for them.

Anna tells Paul it will do no good to separate Sabrrrina from her son. Paul tells Sabrrrina he’s decided to drop the charges, but his office is trusting her to stick around in case they need her to testify. She leaves with Michael and her almost lawyer. Sabrrrina tells Anna she plans on doing everything she can to repay her kindness and Anna says just be a good mother to her son and that will be enough.

Sonny visits Morgan and tells him he knows about Ava. Morgan says it was his decision to break up with Kiki and Sonny is intruding. Sonny says he’s proud of what Morgan has accomplished and will support whatever decisions he makes, as long as someone else isn’t yanking his chain.

Ava sees Kiki in the park. Kiki is wearing the most precious summer dress that has tiny buttons going down it. Ava says Kiki looks happy. Kiki says she and Dillon had a great time at the concert and they’re going on a date. Ava says he seems like a very nice young man. Ava asks if Kiki wants to get some lemonade and talk about her date. Kiki suggests they keep their interests separate since things are calm now.

Tracy and Dillon look over the pictures, which he’s taken in record time. Michael and Sabrrrina come in and Michael says the charges were dropped. Sabrrrina asks where her son is. Tracy says the baby is sleeping. Sabrrrina says the easiest thing would be for them to move back in with Felix. Tracy suggests she move in there. She says she likes having the baby there and since Sabrrina’s legal situation has changed, she’s calling family services to have custody returned, providing Sabrrrina never disappears again. Sabrrrina says she values Tracy’s friendship and she’s stuck with her now. I’m glad they made up. I’ve always had girlfriends of all ages and you don’t often see a female friendship like this on TV shows.

Anna asks Paul what this favor is going to cost her. Paul says he’d like to wipe the slate clean and leave their mistakes in the past. He says second chances are rare, and he got one, so she owes him nothing. She says she wants something from him then.

Julian says he’s never had as strong a bond with anyone and didn’t realize it was conditional. Alexis says she didn’t know refraining from homicide was a condition. He grabs the shirt back and asks her if she’s willing to throw everything away. He grabs her arm. Man, I would so punch this dude in the face at this point.

Sonny tells Morgan it’s okay if they don’t agree on everything. Morgan says it’s good to feel that Sonny has his back though. He tells Sonny about his conversation with Andre and that he’ll be getting out soon.

Ava asks Kiki if she’d like to go to the mall and do some shopping. No interference or meddling, she just wants to get something new for Kiki to wear on her date.

In the hallway, Dillon tells Tracy he’s proud of her. She says she’ll get the best of both worlds, having the baby with her without the responsibility. Sabrrrina asks Michael if he’s okay with her staying there and he says they have plenty of time to talk about everything.

Anna tells Paul her first priority is to build a case against Julian. She wants her old position back as special investigator for the DA. Paul says short of a miracle there’s no way to tie Julian to Duke’s murder. She says she can build a case against him for Carrrlos’s murder though.

Julian apologizes. He tells Alexis if she turns the shirt over to the police, he goes to prison, and is it worth throwing everything away for someone like Carrrlos? He asks if their marriage still has a chance.

Tomorrow, Spinelli!, Alexis says either Julian can have her or get away with murder, and Dante tells Spencer there’s no evidence his father was murdered.

Little Women NY

In lieu of getting Lila out of the baby shower, Jess walks out. Jason asks Lila if she forgot what happened when Terra came to her party and what an asshat she was about it. Dawn interjects that Katie needs all the help she can get which has nothing to do with this. Jason tells her to shut up. (Thank you.) Lila insists it isn’t the same thing and actually she’s right, since Katie specifically said she didn’t want her at the shower beforehand. Since I’m not in a great mood to begin with, this is infuriating me. If it wasn’t for the fact that Katie is having difficulty already, I wish she’d show up and kick Lila out herself.

Jess says she’s not going to miss her best friend’s baby shower and clearly Lila isn’t leaving, so she’s just going to roll with it. Katie comes in wondering wtf Lila is doing there. Lila says that Katie didn’t acknowledge her which is rude. No. What’s rude is showing up at a party you’re not invited to. Katie talks to Jess in the bedroom who suggests they just get it over with. Katie says she’ll give it an hour.

Jason asks about the doctor visit. Katie says the baby is six pounds, but she’s still keeping her in for another week. When Katie opens her gift, Lila forces herself into a picture with Katie. Jess gives Katie some gag gifts which Lila doesn’t understand. In her interview, Jess says she might have given Katie some douche, but Lila is one.

Lila takes Katie aside and apologizes for past stuff and says she wants to be there for Katie. She keeps saying she’s there out of love, but how is it love making a pregnant woman’s blood pressure skyrocket? Lila says that Jess seems like a guard dog, keeping them from getting to know one another. She tells Katie that Jess is drinking whiskey. Oh horrors! A drink? At a party?? What is she thinking??? Basically Lila has nothing good to say about Jess and both Katie and I wish she’d disappear.

Jason rehashes the Terra thing with Jazmin, relating it to Lila showing up at the shower. Lila pops in and doesn’t understand the comparison. She says Terra didn’t come with good intentions. How she came to this conclusion, I have no clue, since she started screaming in Terra’s face the second she saw her. Lila also doesn’t seem to get that it was Jason’s party too, and Terra was his friend. He says she could have sucked it up. Lila is so delusional. Jazmin says she’s done with the both of them arguing. Reality TV, where people consistently show up at parties they’re not invited to.

DJ and Jason go out for drinks. Jason says it’s tough with DJ living in another state, and he needs nights like this to get away from the drama in his own apartment. DJ asks if Jason wants to move in with him, but Jason doesn’t want to move to Connecticut. DJ says at some point, he’ll either have to get a job in New York, or Jason will have to make the move to live with him. Jason says it’s either here or LA for him.

PJ and Katie take a baby prep class where they learn swaddling, diaper changing and such. They don’t seem very prepared, since they don’t even have a car seat. Katie wonders how something so little can require so much stuff. Well, let me tell you about all the stuff I have for my little dogs. I’m quite sure I’ll meet my end slipping on a dog toy. Katie says it’s exciting, but overwhelming, and wonders how they’re paying for everything. She’s concerned that PJ doesn’t realize how much responsibility a baby is.

Dawn’s friend, Doris, is in town and they get together with Lila. Doris is also a paralegal. They discuss dating. Lila has been on Tinder and had a date last night. Dawn is apalled that Lila is having random men she’s met online come over. Dawn says maybe meeting for coffee is a better idea, but Lila says it’s not coffee she’s looking for. While I can’t stand Dawn’s delivery, I have to agree that this probably isn’t safe.

Stupid moronic busybodies Dawn and Lila meet with Katie’s mother, so they can stick their nose in someone else’s business. Katie’s mother says PJ hasn’t been as responsible as she’d like him to be. Lila says the reason she pushed herself into the party was because she’s worried about Katie. They ask about PJ’s employment. Katie’s mother says she’s been supplementing them while PJ works on his music. Dawn expresses her concern over his lack of employment and says she’ll talk to him. Because that’s totally appropriate. I’m starting to despise these two at this point. Seriously, it seems like there’s something wrong with them.

Jason video chats with his brother, Jonathan, who is pretty cute. Jason tells him about PJ wanting him to move in, but he’s worried about his parents accepting that he’s gay. Jonathan thinks he should wait before making any more moves, since their parents are just getting used to him moving away from home. Jason is afraid DJ will leave him. Jonathan says he should be careful, since this is his first relationship, and that if DJ really cares about him, he should be willing to wait. Good advice. Jason is too young to make major changes in his life for someone else.

Jazmin meets her trainer, Mike, in Central Park. She invites Jess, who is glad for a drama free afternoon. They talk about how gaining even two pounds can be excessive for a little person. They talk about Katie and PJ. Jazmin hopes that PJ doesn’t look to Jess for all the answers. Jess says she has no problem telling PJ to figure it out for himself. OMG – none of my friends has ever had their nose this far into my business without me asking them to.

Katie is at the laundromat. Lila and Dawn come to help and she hopes that they’re not going to just piss her off. In her interview, Dawn has a lot to say about PJ. She tells Katie that she and Lila had lunch with her mom. She says she’s concerned about PJ not helping her enough. In her interview, Katie says their help is turning into the opposite of help. Katie tries to explain that she loves PJ. They barrage her with questions and Dawn says PJ should be more of a man. Katie says their nitpicking is getting annoying and maybe that’s why the both of them are single. She starts to get angry and says she’s sick of them being in her business. A lot of what she says is bleeped. Katie walks out, the two morons trailing behind her.

Dawn grasps at Katie for a hug. Lila has the good sense to leave, but Dawn keeps harping at Katie about PJ. Dawn says she and Lila will finish up the clothes and drop them off. In her interview, Katie says whenever she’s around these two, her blood pressure rises and she starts to cramp. She calls her mother who thinks they should head for the hospital. She calls PJ and tells him her mother thinks she’s going into labor and they’re picking him up on the way to the hospital.

In the car, Katie tells her mother and PJ about what happened at the laundromat. She says she doesn’t need her mother conspiring with “those two little snobs and airing her business.” She tells her mother she’s glad she’s there, but she wishes she could keep her mouth shut around the judgmental ones.

Next time, there’s concern about the baby flippig, Dawn outs Lila about Tinder, Lila gives Dawn a good push <snort>.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Bethenny tells The Countess that she shouldn’t send someone an apology and then talk smack about them. She says no one can have an honest conversation with her because she’s not honest. She brings up what The Countess has said about Carole, and The Countess has the audacity to say she wishes Carole well. Carole says she constantly criticizes her for having a relationship with a younger man when she dates younger men all the time. The Countess claims she owns her stuff. Carole says there’s been no end to the ugly things The Countess has said about her.

Dorinda pulls out a Twister game and Jules is on board. The argument in the kitchen continues while they play.

Bethenny says women feel like The Countess is the person they don’t want their men around.

Meanwhile, at Chateau Morgan, the interns are assisting Sonja in making a care package for her daughter, who’s away at school. She claims she’s going to stop drinking. Not because she needs to, but just to shut the others up.

Bethenny says The Countess brings out something in other women. She uses Ramona as an example and The Countess says Ramona is miffed because she wants to date the guy The Countess is dating. Bethenny says the bottom line is that she criticizes others for the same things she does. The Countess says that only Bethenny thinks that, but Carole concurs that The Countess has that reputation. The Countess tries to drag Dorinda into it and in her interview, Dorinda says she wants to burn her house down right now.

In her interview, The Countess says they can’t burn her because she’s Teflon. Um… Bethenny tells her that saying she’s mentoring Sonja is demented. The Countess says she’s concerned for Sonja and she just wants her to know she cares. Dorinda isn’t thrilled about The Countess being upset. The Countess says Bethenny is trying to take Sonja down because of the Tipsy Girl thing, but Bethenny says she wants nothing to do with that. She adds that The Countess wasn’t there, so she’s only discussing what’s between the two of them, not between her and Sonja.

They sit down to eat, as if anyone has an appetite. Santa arrives! Santa asks who’s been naughty or nice, and passes out gifts. I’m not sure who Santa is, but I don’t think Santa is a guy. The gifts are personalized wine glasses that hold an entire bottle. Just what this group needs. In her interview, Carole says she’s tired of pretending and doesn’t want to be around The Countess anymore. She leaves the table. Bethenny says she’s sorry for the way she spoke, but The Countess is cunning and crafty.

Ramona tells The Countess that she has the habit of moving in on other women’s men because she needs the attention that someone else is getting. She gives her an example of when she was flirting with a guy and went to the ladies room. When she returned, The Countess refused to give her the seat back. The Countess says she likes to flirt and Bethenny calls her a barracuda. Bethenny says the bottom line is that she’s not a girl’s girl. The Countess insists she has never stolen a man away from anyone, but that’s not exactly what Bethenny and Ramona are talking about. I can identify with this. I’ve met those women who don’t like other women. One time, at a dinner after a show I’d worked on, one of the cast members had shown some interest in me and we were talking. Another girl actually squeezed a chair in between us and turned her back to me. This is the kind of crap The Countess pulls. And just for the record, I was the one who ended up going out with him.

The Countess says she just doesn’t see it the same way. Like Bill Murray in Meatballs, Bethenny says it just doesn’t matter and decides to go to bed, even though it’s only nine o’clock. Dorinda asks The Countess if she understands now why she didn’t want Sonja there. The Countess says she loves Dorinda, but it’s a real shitshow. In her interview, Dorinda says no matter what you present to them, this group can ruin it.

In the morning, Bethenny tells Carole she has an argument hangover. She can’t believe she said the things she did. They both agree that if they were told any of the things Bethenny said, it would be over. Bethenny has plans to just put her jacket on over her pajamas and get in the car.

Jules says despite the insanity, she was able to relax and didn’t even call her kids. Bethenny and Carole sneak out without saying good-by. When they’re noticed, they think better of it and go back in after loading the car. We flash back to when they ditched everyone at Jules’s place. Bethenny apologizes to Dorinda, who takes it like a champ. In her interview, Dorinda says it wasn’t very respectful.

The Countess tells Dorinda what a gorgeous place she has. Dorinda had been hopeful that everyone would relax and enjoy the holidays. As the others depart, she says she loves them for coming, but also loves them for leaving.

Jules and Michael are still looking for a nanny. She says she’s been so busy, her armpit hairs are three inches long. Eww! Unless you’re in Europe. She makes some coffee and actually gets it right. My Lord, what has this woman done her whole life that she can’t multi-task in the shower or brew coffee?

Carole visits Bethenny who makes avocado toast. Carole doesn’t feel like The Countess was sincere with her apology, but it’s fine since not everyone has to be friends. Bethenny says she wasn’t trying to slut shame, she just doesn’t like the hypocrisy. She says she gets possessed by the devil in the Berkshires and is never going there again.

Yet another holiday party at a restaurant with Ramona as hostess. She has the ill-conceived notion that somehow everyone will get along. The Countess arrives first. Ramona tells her that she should have apologized to Carole sooner. She also says she told Sonja to stop sounding like a broken record and make things right with Bethenny about the Tipsy Girl business. No. She should just shut up altogether.

Everyone arrives and the appetizers are passed. The Countess sits next to Bethenny, who really doesn’t want to talk to her. Carole is on Bethenny’s other side and The Countess talks over her, telling Carole that she’s sincerely sorry for the things she said. Carole says she appreciates it. In her interview, Carole says this apology seems slightly more sincere. The Countess tries to apologize to Bethenny again. Bethenny says she didn’t mean to get crazy, but the Skinny Girl thing set her off. She says The Countess just needs to say for once that she had nothing to do with it, and she does. So are we putting this to bed now?

They talk about The Countess’s boyfriend and how he might be “the one.”In her interview, Bethenny says The Countess has relationships in dog years, by the second date, she has her wedding dress ready. Bethenny excuses herself to use the phone and Sonja arrives. In her interview, Sonja says she kept getting texts from the Berkshires that if she doesn’t drop Skinny Girl, Bethenny will never talk to her again, but not from Bethenny.

Ramona tries to get Sonja to talk to Bethenny, who disappears like Houdini. Ramona reports to The Countess that Sonja is being stubborn, so The Countess confronts Sonja. She claims that Sonja said she was dropping the whole thing and fixing it with Bethenny. Sonja says she never said any such thing. Dorinda says it’s a good thing she wasn’t in the Berkshires. Sonja says if Bethenny wanted to talk to her, she would. Ramona says she needs to fix it, but Sonja says she’s not going to chase her down. Apparently, Sonja was the text happy one over the weekend. Sonja gets loud, trying to correct the misconceptions about her texts.

Sonja says that she might have been able to communicate with Bethenny in the Berkshires and gets on Dorinda’s case for excluding her. Dorinda says she didn’t think it would be a healthy environment and she stands by her decision. Sonja whines that they gang up on her all the time and leaves.

The Countess tells her not to leave and she whines some more. She says she tried to talk to Bethenny, but she left. She screeches at The Countess in the stairwell, repeating herself. She says Carole told her Bethenny had no hard feelings, so what are these? Soft boiled? Okay, that was kind of funny.

In her interview, Carole says she thinks Sonja is a decent person, but doesn’t think she even thought about Bethenny when she saw the opportunity to make money. Ramona makes a happy holidays, God bless us every one toast.

Next time, The Countess talks about getting married, Ramona tells The Countess about Tom, another couples dinner and The Countess annoys Bethenny.

April 27, 2016 — GH, Little Reunion, Baby Number Two & NYC Wives

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Hayden meets Curtis at The Floating Rib. She snaps her fingers for the waitstaff and Curtis suggests she not be rude, lest their be retaliation like spitting in her food.

Epiphany has to do inventory and is not too pleased. She tells Finn there’s a problem with the pill count in the dispensory. She’s being audited because someone else didn’t do their job.

Tracy is ready to leave the hospital in the morning. She tells Finn she’s not done with him yet. He asks if that’s a backgammon invitation, but she says it’s more serious than that.

Dillon and Kiki are in the garage. He asks how Kiki is holding up and she says so far, so good.

Kristina goes to visit Morgan and bumps into a young guy.

Julian tells someone (probably Hammer, since he’s the only guy who works for the organization) on the phone to find out who the eyewitness is and make sure he doesn’t talk.

Once again, Jason and Sam get caught in the rain. They run into a stable. Someone is watching them from outside.

Hayden tells Curtis things haven’t been going well. He asks what about her end game? She tells him Nicholas tricked her by selling the ELQ shares to Jason. She says it’s over, both her marriage and taking over ELQ. She says she thought about making restitution to her father’s clients, but she can’t do that with only $5 million. She checked the prenup and there’s no way out of Nicholas giving it to her. Curtis says clearly they’re from different circles, since where he comes from losers don’t get a consolation prize like that. He advises her to take the money and run.

Tracy tells Finn that there’s going to be an emergency hospital board meeting. She says Obrecht isn’t acting in the best interest of the hospital. She’s staging a coup, and when the dust settles, Finn will be on staff.

Jason gives Sam his coat and they kiss.

Alexis brings Leo downstairs. He wasn’t sleeping and caught her looking at him. Julian says he’s having a problem at the office. Alexis asks who it is he wants to make sure doesn’t talk?

Dillon doesn’t want to wait for the auto service, so he decides to change the tire himself. Kiki asks if he wants to make movies, why did he leave LA? Dillon says his brother was worried about his mom, his dad moved back to town, and life happened. He says he was glad to be there when his mom got sick though. He talks about Maxie’s sister, Georgie, and how she was murdered and he gets why Kiki wants to hid from the world. He says things were better once he decided to go back out into the world.

New guy says he hasn’t met Morgan yet. Kristina tells him to look at the place like a clinic, not a loony bin, but he says he’s there to visit someone. While he’s talking to her, Morgan comes out and new guy leaves.

Kristina gives Morgan a playlist of upbeat music. Morgan tells her new guy was totally hitting on her.

Curtis gives Hayden sports analogies to tell her to focus on what she has, not what she lost. She says if she got the ELQ money, she could have paid some people back. Curtis says that was her father’s problem, and she shouldn’t feel obligated to clean up the mess. She says she has to meet someone who will prbably have more bad news.

Julian tells Alexis he was calling in a favor because his family’s safety is his first priority. He says he hired a legit security firm, but Alexis says she doesn’t want or need it. He says it’s a high profile case with a lot at stake for a lot of people. Alexis asks if he’s done anything to compromise himself or the case, but Julian says no. He takes Leo back to bed.

It’s still pouring. Jason saw a car pull up, but although he tried to get their attention, they left. Sam is stressing about Franco, but Jason tells her not to worry. Sam says she’s afraid for Jason and doesn’t want anything to take him away from her or Danny. Jason suggests they find a way to keep warm.

Kristina asks Morgan if he heard about her and Parker. Morgan asks who is he? Kristina explains what happened and how she got suspended, and by the way, Parker is a woman. Morgan is like, really? you got suspended? Kristina says it’s funny he’s more focused on that than her trying to have sex with a woman. Morgan says that’s how it goes in college and at least he’s not the only screw up now.

Hayden comes to Tracy’s hospital room. Tracy introduces her to Finn. Finn tells Tracy good luck and Tracy says she’ll see him soon. Hayden asks if Tracy called her in to gloat. Tracy tells her she’s fired.

Epiphany says she has to ask Finn something and she’s dreading it.

Alexis looks at the preliminary report from the eyewitness. Julian says he guesses he’s not allowed to look at it and she tells him he guessed right and puts it in her bag. She says it’s not great for the marriage to keep secrets, but it’s necessary. Julian says as long as his old life seeps into their new one, it has to be done. She says her head gets it, but her heart doesn’t like it. Julian says the eyewitness feels like a plant, like something Sonny would do. Alexis says the witness doesn’t seem that credible.

Kiki talks about depression and like it’s losing all hope even when it’s given back to you. Dillon asks if that’s how she feels and she says she shouldn’t because she survived and everything is fine now. Dillon says just because the body is healed doesn’t mean the spirit is healed on the same timetable. Kiki says Morgan seems to be getting better an she wishes she would to.

Kristina says Sonny doesn’t know about Parker being a woman. Morgan thinks he’d be accepting, but Kristina says she doesn’t want to test that right now. Morgan thanks her for acting normal and not making him feel like the biggest screw up in the world. She says it takes one to know one.

Finn asks if there have been more complaints about Roxie. Epiphany says no, but asks him if he can sing. He asks if she’s asking him out to karaoke and she says she has a boyfriend. She tells him about the Nurses Ball and says she’ll be expecting him to participate. he says he has no talents and she says he’ll fit right in.

Hayden tells Tracy she knows she lost everything, mostly because of her own bad decisions. Tracy says Hayden was successful before her father ruined things. Tracy says she hates wasted potential. Hayden says don’t worry, she won’t ask for a reference. Tracy says she sometimes almost feels sorry for Hayden, then she remembers what a self-serving bitch she is. Hayden says she doesn’t need Tracy’s sympathy and walks out the door, nearly running into Finn. He asks if she really feels badly about the lives that were ruined by her and her father.

Jason and Sam cuddle, and Jason talks about how happy she’s made him. He says he’s concerned though about getting into it with Nicholas and Franco, and doesn’t want any payback. Sam says she feels safest when she’s with him.

Hayden asks if Finn invested money with her father and she’s sorry. He says someone he cared about had been affected. She says she had no idea what her father was doing until it was too late and if she could make restitution, she would. Finn says yeah, right.

Alexis says she said too much already, so just forget it. Julian says he shouldn’t have pressed, but it seems fishy that someone should step forward right now. Alexis hears Leo on the monitor. She tells Julian she loves their life together and goes to check on the baby. No surprise, Julian heads straight for her bag and looks at the paper.

Dillon gets the tire changed and complements Kiki on being out in the world without a meltdown. He asks if she wants to go for ice cream and she says yes.

Kristina runs into new guy again on her way out. He asks if he can call her some time. Introducing himself would be a great start.

Julian calls Hammer. He tells him he has the witness’s name and address, and to shut him up no matter what it takes.

Tracy tells Finn she couldn’t help but overhear his conversation with Hayden. She asks who the person was who was hurt by Hayden’s father.

Hayden tells Curtis that Tracy wanted to see her to fire her in person, and then one of the doctors jumped her about her father. Curtis says she could leave town, but he’d miss her. She says hasn’t he heard she’s a con woman with a heart of stone? He says he knows her better than that. She says every time she turns around something worse happens. He says that’s the good news; it can’t get any worse since she’s hit rock bottom.

Curtis goes to get drinks and two FBI guys approach the table and say Hayden has to come with them.

Sam is concerned Franco will push Jason until he reacts. Jason says she should be more worried about him doing something dangerous. Someone is peeping through the window.

Tomorrow, Sonny tells Carly he doesn’t want her anywhere near the situation, Tracy is released from the hospital, and Franco comes home to Nina.

Little Women: LA — The Reunion, Part One

Kevin Frazier is hosting. Was Vivica A. Fox busy? Or did she get some real work?

First, the flash backs. Weddings, tea throwing, whining, social media, more whining.

Kevin asks what it’s like to relive the moments. How does he think? It brings up all the past crap again. He asks about Briana’s wedding and if she’s glad Christy came without being invited. She says it was bittersweet. They’re both going through a lot, but communication is open.

Moving on to the babies. Kevin thinks they should have a mid-wife on set with all the pregnancies. (BTW, all of the ladies look fabulous. They’ve really come into their own styles.) Elena is miffed that she can’t wear heels, but says it’s all worth it. Briana says she’s feeling big and a lot is going on in her personal life. Kevin says Matt left two children in Seattle and wonders if Briana’s concerned he’ll leave her, but she says it’s more likely she’ll leave him. Terra is now pregnant with baby number two. Christy says she’s happy for Terra and Terra says she’s just as fake as always. Terra says even being pregnant, she’s thinner than Christy on her best day. Whoa.

Kevin asks Christy if she has adoption news and she starts crying. I assume the news isn’t good. Poor Todd gets brought into the fray. We flash back to all the Christy and Todd baby stuff and Christy harping on him to lose weight. Todd says that they’re baby got scooped out from under them by another family.

Kevin asks Terra for her input, but she says it’s none of her business, especially since they’ve affected her home life, which is none of their business. Kevin asks Todd about the weight issue and if gastric bypass is still on the table. He says he’s lost 30 pounds on his own, so the jury is still out. Exit Todd. That was fast.

On to the “challenges” of friendship, and a few volatile scenes between Terra and Tonya. Kevin asks Tonya if she was surprised at all the screaming and yelling on Terra’s part. Tonya says she dropped the ball as far as Penny’s surgery went, but she did call and text.

Commercial break with important information. Little Women: NYC is back on Wednesday, May 4.

Elena says Terra sometimes thinks she’s a super woman who can do everything. She says sometimes Terra says she doesn’t want help when she really does. Terra gets emotional and expects everyone to be a mind reader. Kevin asks if things are good or still strained between the three of them and Terra says a bunch of stuff that doesn’t really answer that question.

Kevin says one relationship that’s been consistently cold, but has started thawing, is Jasmine and Elena. We flash back to Elena being pretty stubborn about Jasmine’s inclusion into the group. Kevin asks Jasmine if she thinks jealousy was involved and she says only on Elena’s part. Elena balks at that and Kevin asks how it’s going now. They both say things are cool. I have to add that Jasmine’s magenta hair extensions or highlights look fantastic.

Kevin asks Briana if she has any friends left in the group and we flash back to all that mess, ending with the Matt sexting business. Briana says she and Terra will never be best friends, but things are copacetic now. Terra asks if she can understand how they felt shafted by Christy, who told them she wasn’t supportive of the marriage, but told Briana a different story.

Kevin asks why the ladies decided to confront Briana about the sexting. Jasmine is pretty pissed because she’d been supportive of Matt and then he proved to be a jerk. They’re all annoyed about Matt acting like a sex-crazed idiot when Briana is pregnant and Tonya says clearly he doesn’t love Briana. I’m with Jasmine on this, since I was also supportive of Matt throughout the season and he turned out to be such a huge disappointment.

Tonya says they saw the evidence from day one, but Briana refused to listen. Kevin asks Briana if Matt can do no wrong in her eyes. Briana says he’s been gone from the house for a week now and Terra says he’s just visiting his kids. Kevin asks for clarification and Briana says they’re on a break. No one is really letting her talk though. Kevin says hold on, she’s in a tough position. He doesn’t condone the behavior, but says Briana is pregnant, so cut her some slack. He asks if she still loves Matt and she says she has to figure it out. Elena says there’s a lot on Briana’s shoulders and the world isn’t black and white. She says that some people can forgive more than others and this is something Briana has to figure out for herself. Kevin says it’s a hard decision, what Matt’s done is very wrong, but not everything is cut and dried. He asks if she ever regrets getting pregnant, but Briana says she can’t say that.

Enter Matt. Better hide all throwable objects. And the chairs. Jasmine refuses to sit near him and moves to the other side. She asks him if he even knows how much pain he’s causing Briana and on top of it, he made her look like an idiot for defending him. She asks him why, and he says there’s no excuse, so he’s not even going to try. He says he’s sorry and he knows that seems meaningless coming from him, but it’s the best he can say. We flash back to all the awful Matt moments this season. And also the wedding.

Kevin asks Matt why. Matt starts to talk about his past and the women start laughing and putting in their two cents. Matt says he’s desperate for attention, especially sexual, and he’s trying to figure things out. Kevin asks how many women he’s been involved with and he says he’s not sure and barely remembers most of the conversations with them. Tonya talks about him not having a job and idle hands being the devil’s workshop.

Christy says she’s an addict and it’s something you have to work on daily. Tonya says he’ll always disrespect Briana and he doesn’t love her. Kevin asks why Matt stayed with Briana and got her pregnant when he was involved with these other women? Kevin takes Matt to task and tells him he should give everyone answers, since he had no problem giving out d*ck pics. Now, I’m not defending Matt in any way, but it would be nice if they’d let him answer. He’s barely been able to get a word in with the ladies barraging him.

Kevin says this should be the happiest time in Briana’s life and she has to deal with some hard stuff. Matt says he was sexually abused as a child. He says he never told anyone, so he can’t blame his family for not helping him. He says he goes for immediate gratification. Terra says he’s just trying to validate his actions. Tonya says she was molested and she didn’t react like that because there couldn’t possibly be a different reaction than hers. Kevin asks what Elena thinks. She says Matt needs to grow up and stop his behavior if he’s serious about Briana.

Kevin asks if Briana thinks Matt has stopped his behavior, but no one let’s her talk. She says she’s not sure because he’s said it was over before. His past aggressiveness is brought up. Kevin reads a tabloid article about Matt’s domestic violence and asks if the statement is true. Matt says no. Kevin says some of the ladies asked to be separated from him and he says he’s never touched a woman. He brings up Terra throwing the glass. Touche.

Everyone starts talking at once. There is some animosity between Terra and Christy. Kevin asks if when Matt heard his own texts, if he was embarrassed. Briana says she told him to leave for a week and he did. Haven’t we been here before? Along with the word “break?” Kevin says they’re going to read some of the texts when they come back from break. During the break, Briana and Matt say they’re not staying. Kevin says he can understand Briana not wanting to be there, but Matt should take his medicine.

This reunion is tough to watch because no one has any control and you can’t hear what anyone is saying.

Next week, The Reunion, part two — Briana is hurt, the men join the group, and the ice tea incident is discussed.

Terra’s Little Family

Tonya discourages Terra from having another baby. Elena agrees. Terra tells them both to shut up because she’s pregnant. She leaves the table.

Terra tells us she was late, but it wasn’t unusual. Then she took two pregnancy tests and it was confirmed.

Tonya feels awful about what she said. Terra comes back all sniffly. She says she didn’t want to say anything because she hasn’t told Joe yet. She says she’s crying because this is the second time she told friends before Joe. She says she’s scared because she knows it’s a lot to take on, but in her heart, she knows she can do it. She really is happy though. Tonya and Elena say they’re there for her.

It’s time for Terra to tell Joe she’s pregnant. She says it took a lot of convincing to just get him to try again, so she isn’t sure how he’s going to take the news of it happening so fast. She has a “Big Sis” onsie for Penny and that’s how she’s going to make the announcement.

Joe is having coffee and Terra brings Penny in. She says she has something she needs to tell him. Then she asks if he made his doctor’s appointment yet. He’s like, huh? She says she put Penny in a special outfit. She turns Penny around and says she’s pregnant.

Joe starts laughing and says it wasn’t supposed to happen yet. He says he couldn’t be happier and he loves her. Terra says how could he not want another one of these, showing him Penny. She is very adorable. Joe says she’s not even a year old and she’s a big sis. Joe figures it must have happened on the camping trip and hopes they don’t have a wookiee.

Terra tells him that she told Elena and Tonya. She tears up, but Joe doesn’t think it’s a big deal. He says all he cares about it them and the baby being healthy. She says she knows he still has to deal with his health issues and encourages him to make an appointment for his shot. She wants him to get in shape with her and he says round is a shape. Ha-ha!

Terra wants to do a family photo shoot before she gets huge. She’s gotten matching onsie pajamas for them to wear. Joe isn’t thrilled and says he’ll look like a big, fuzzy tomato. He says he booked his cortisone shot. Terra is happy about that and he asks if that will give him a reprieve from the onsie idea, but that’s a no.

Joe and Terra go to Joe’s consultation. Joe is scared to death of needles, but he’s in so much pain, he has to lean on something when he stands. The doctor says it’s a safe procedure, but there are risks, and it doesn’t help everybody. He says it’s the size of an acupuncture needle, which surprises me.

It’s picture time! Joe says the onsie theme is weird and embarrassing and he can’t believe Terra is making him do it. She says it will be cute. We all agree one size does not fit all and Terra adjusts Joe’s outfit. They do look cute, but this seems like a picture you’d use for a Christmas card.

Joe says he doesn’t remember what it’s like for his back not to hurt and is hoping that the shot works for him. He wants to be able to interact with Penny and the new baby without pain. Terra tells him regardless, he’s a great father.

Terra goes with Joe to get his shot. He’s pretty nervous and remembers the surgeries he had when he was a kid. They have a problem with the IV and have to do it again. Ugh. I know how stressful that is, since it’s happened to me. They give Joe oxygen to help him relax. He thinks he’s going to pass out. He’s petrified of needles, but wants to be the best he can be for his family.

Joe tells the doctor he felt something and asks if it’s normal. The doctor thinks it’s okay. Everything seems to go well and Joe is in recovery. Terra tells him she’s proud of him. Joe says he’ll drive, but Terra is like, no.

A few days later, there’s no change, but the doctor says to give it some time. I hope it works for him. I feel invested in this. Joe and Terra go to the pre-natal appointment. Because Terra has irregular periods, the doctor thought it would take a while, so he’s surprised too. The doctor determines that she’s five weeks and five days. They do a sonogram. The doctor says at this point, all they’ll see is a gestational sack. Yep, there it is. The doctor says he doesn’t see the heartbeat yet and has them make another appointment. Terra asks if it’s possible there’s nothing there and the doctor says there’s always that possibility, but they have to wait and see.

Terra is worried about a miscarriage, and meets with Tonya for lunch since she doesn’t want to burden Joe. She tells Tonya what happened with the sonogram. She says it would be devastating if it was a false alarm. Tonya tells her not to cry and gives her a hug. She says everything will be okay and tells Terra to focus on Penny. They’re about to get the MRI results which will determine if Penny needs a shunt.

Terra thinks the decompression surgery really helped and hopes this is the last doctor visit they have for a while. Dr. Danielpour specializes in little people neurosurgery. They look at the results and it looks good. The doctor does point out the damage to the spinal cord which might never go away. Penny’s head size is checked. The doctor says they’re not out of the woods yet in terms of whether or not she needs a shunt. He says you don’t want to do it if you don’t have to, and they should know by the time she’s a year old.

Terra is kind of bummed, but Joe says that there was no diagnosis yet. She says she thought they were free and clear, and he says they’re not, but they can handle it.

It’s time for the next ultrasound. Terra is afraid if they lose the baby, Joe will change his mind about having a second one.

It’s there! Along with the heartbeat. Penny is a big sister. Happiness abounds!

The doctor asks if there’s been spotting and Terra says no. He says they don’t need to make restrictions then. Joe says they needed the good news. Terra says having Penny changed their lives, and Joe says they weren’t prepared for the half of it. Penny is developing at her own pace. Although the physical development is a beat behind, she’s on target mentally. They don’t know whether the baby will be a little person or average sized yet.

They say they still have a long way to go, but they’ll get through it together.

The Real Housewives of NYC

Duly noted that in her tagline, Ramona says that like wine, she gets better with time, not age.

Bethenny is loving the Hamptons. I would too if I had this house. She’s having an anything goes, no airs party.

John and Dorinda are staying at Jules’s place. Dorinda says John is going to be a gentleman and apologize. John acts clueless, but we see a conversation where Dorinda tells him what an a-hole he was. She coaches him on what to say. Jules tells him not to add fuel to the fire. Dorinda asks if they have to review everything again. Jules says deep down John is a teddy bear, but that’s not what I’d call him.

Carole arrives at Bethenny’s with her dog. A playmate for Cookie! This time it’s a real barbecue, not a Kyle Richards barbecue. Bethenny tells Carole about what happened with John at the bra after party. She says she needs to back off because Dorinda and John obviously have something odd going on. She’s surprised he’s coming to the party. Bethenny warns Carole that the Countess will be there. Carole says her plan is to keep a friendly distance.

Ramona is next with some guy whose name I missed, but I don’t think he’s a date. It’s autumn and just gorgeous outside. A crowd gathers quickly. Okay, Ramona’s guest is talking about smokey eyes. He’s definitely not a date.

Carole tells her Jules is having a brunch, but Ramona will be busy recovering from her date. Here come Dorinda, John, Jules and Michael. John wants to just hang out by the cocktail bar, but Dorinda says that’s not happening. Jules says she would never want to be in John’s position.

John flounders, standing by himself. Bethenny points everyone toward the food. Dorinda says Bethenny is ignoring John and prompts him to talk to her. He claims to not be nervous and he probably isn’t because he’s too stupid to be. Bethenny thinks neither one of them probably remembers the incident. She thinks she should have been honest and told Dorinda not to bring him.

John wanders around with a drink in his hand like an alcoholic dinosaur. He finally parks himself near Dorinda who is sitting with Ramona and Jules.

The Countess arrives. Carole says she always seems to make an entrance. The Countess immediately picks up a hula hoop and fails at it miserably. Dorinda introduces her to Jules and Michael. Bethenny tells Carole the Countess is clearly uncomfortable. Since she can’t find a place to sit, the Countess sits with Dorinda and company.

Carole says she feels badly for John. Bethenny says it’s time to hit the bar. She has a whole separate bar on her property and it’s the coolest thing. She talks about John lurking in the shadows. She talks to the Countess, asking if she’s uncomforable with Carole. The Countess says she thinks Carole is the one who’s uncomfortable. Bethenny says the Countess doesn’t get it and doesn’t remember anything past five minutes ago. Bethenny says she has her own bs and feels like she’s hiding at her own party. The Countess asks why she just didn’t un-invite John and Bethenny says something about Dorinda being fragile.

Ramona jets, saying the party is weird. Bethenny tries to get the Countess to talk to Carole and she says she needs a drink.

Finally it happens. John asks for Bethenny’s attention. He sits next to her, and she and Carole leave to get a drink. Bethenny says don’t follow the tiger in the cage. Dorinda is a little annoyed, saying at least be nice to guests you invited.

The Countess tells Carole that she can’t avoid her forever, but Carole says yes she can. Bethenny comes back out with s’mores stuff. Carole says that John is like a little boy, pulling the ponytail of a girl he likes. Everyone has s’mores. The Countess tells Carole they need to talk at some point, but she’s glad to see her since she hasn’t in so long. Carole says of course not. The last time they talked, they ended up screaming at each other.

The Countess wants to go aside, but Carole says say whatever right here. The Countess says they’ve both said hurtful things, but Carole says no, the Countess said hurtful things. She says the Countess said a lot of crazy stuff on social media, like that Carole broke up her niece and Adam. She was even talking about Carole’s writing. The Countess, who can’t come up with one thing Carole has said about her, says they can agree to not be friends, but be nice to each other when they see each other. In her interview, Carole points out there was no apology. The Countess tells Bethenny that Carole didn’t give her a chance to apologize. Jules says the brunch is going to be a sh*tshow because she didn’t realize the Countess and Carole didn’t get along.

John corners Bethenny in the bar. She tells him to step outside if he wants to talk. Bethenny says she doesn’t know what he remembers and he just thinks he was rude. She says she doesn’t care about his personality, but he came in thinking he had a smoking gun and said some uneducated things. He says she does that too, but he’s not going into it because it’s her birthday party. What it really is, is like the Countess, he can’t come up with any actual examples. He says Bethenny said things to upset Dorinda, but doesn’t know exactly what Bethenny said. He says she called him an opportunist and that’s what Bethenny is. She says yes, but not on the backs of other people. He says he apologizes for going out of bounds for someone he loved. Bethenny says he doesn’t even know what he’s apologizing for and the details are at the bottom of a tequila bottle somewhere.

Jules thinks Bethenny is selfish because she’s not ignoring John’s alcoholic idiocy. Dorinda is embarrassed by the whole thing and the Countess follows her outside. Dorinda says she’s trying to establish a relationship with Bethenny and keep her relationship with John going. Bethenny says she’ll have to put aside being repulsed by John because she really does like Dorinda and it’s not cool for party guests to be crying.

The Countess and Dorinda are leaving. Bethenny tells Dorinda that she and John can be cordial for her sake. She finds John and tells him that Dorinda is the most upset of the three of them, like a kid in a divorce, and that everything is fine between them. They leave happy. Bethenny says this is the best birthday she’s ever had since she’s not crying in a bathroom or divorced, and she hasn’t verbally assaulted anyone.

It’s time for brunch at Jules’s house. John brings out one of the biggest bottles of wine I’ve ever seen. He gets nosy about the Countess and Carole. Bethenny thought there was going to be a crowd, but Carole tells her there’s only going to be seven of them. Bethenny has brought cinnamon babka. I just had my first babka — a chocolate one — and it was amazing.

John answers the door, not exactly putting Bethenny at ease. Construction is going on and Jules tells them it’s a seven year project. We flash back to Alex and Simon’s three year project a million years ago. They start to eat and Bethenny talks construction with Michael. No surprise, Bethenny has a lot of unwelcome opinions.

Michael asks how Bethenny enjoyed her birthday. A bee comes in the house and John says he’s allergic. In her interview, Bethenny wonders if it’s bad to want to cover him in honey. Bethenny points out to Carole that Jules isn’t eating. She says it’s textbook to have a lot of food out and push it on other people.

The Countess makes her entrance, toting a guy named Paul. Jules is going to have a tour of the house and Carole wants to leave. Michael ropes Bethenny and Michael into a mini tour. They come across the great leveler — dog poop. No matter how rich you are, your dog will still poop on the floor. Bethenny and Carole slip out.

Jules gripes to Dorinda about Bethenny. Dorinda feels badly because Bethenny burst Jules’s bubble with her negativity.

Next week, Jules is having a hard time with Bethenny’s opinions, Ramona visits her daughter, Jules talks about eating disorders, and the Countess and Bethenny get into it.

September 15, 2015 — Port Charles, a Mermaid & a Birthday

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

General Hospital

I like Rick’s Clark Kent look sooo much better. I tend to forget he’s Sonny’s brother on a regular basis. Like any time he’s not mentioning it.

FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT’S HOLY, ELIZABETH, TELL HIM!

Oh great, she’s telling Jake her other secret.

Everyone is getting all lovey dovey over Sonny. Big decision happening. If they remove the bullet, he could bleed to death due to his weakened condition, but if they wait for him to get stronger, in the meantime, the bullet could move and kill him. Everyone clap if you believe in fairies Sonny.

Ha-ha! Rick suggests he and Sam get back to their “regularly scheduled animosity.” Don’t tell me Rick and Sam are going to end up putting 2 and 2 together before Elizabeth gets a conscience.

I don’t think Morgan is bi-polar. I think he’s uni-polar because I’ve only seen one mood out of him – whiny and/or angry whiny. I have to add that Bryan Allen Craig is really good in this part, but he’s probably wishing they’d give him more to work with too.

Yeah, yeah, we all have regrets, Liz. Coulda, shoulda, woulda. Why don’t you tell him??? I’ve never really liked Elizabeth, but I’ve never thought of her as stupid. Someone is going to come up with this sooner or later, and the only way for her to save herself is to tell him first. Although who knows? I never understood Jason anyway.

Commercial time. I guess a lot of the shows are starting their seasons this week. I am so glad Z Nation is back. Like Sweeny Todd’s arm, my Fridays are complete again.

Hey, I think I have that sweater/jacket that Carly is wearing. It wouldn’t be the first time. A while ago, I got the best sweater from Nasty Gal online and before I even had a chance to wear it, Britt showed up in the same one. Then I was afraid to wear it because I thought people would think I was just trying to copy her, when in reality, it was the other way around.

Maxie and Nathan – my favorite couple! Whoa. Maxie got a little close there too, with Jake’s real identify. Can Elizabeth do something with her hands other than wringing them? She’s been doing that for 2 days like she has OCD.

We end with Sonny being wheeled into surgery. And one more day that Jake doesn’t know who he is.

Below Deck

Don has decided to skip out mid-charter because he’s an engineer and would rather take his marbles and go home than admit he’s wrong. Idiot. Connie isn’t sad to see him go (me neither), but admits it leaves them short-handed.

I desperately want to get in that water. I did vacation in the Bahamas once. When I was 14 and had no appreciation for it. I only wanted to get back home to my friends. One of those sad ironies of life. I join Don in the idiot pool and wish I could have a do-over and spend a week there now.

Dean (the primary guest) wants the crew to have a “dive off” where the guests will score them and the prize is $500. If holding your nose and jumping off the boat counted, I’d be in. The crew dons costumes. Connie wears a shark tank suit and a tutu, which looks like one of my club outfits from the ‘80s. Captain Lee says, “There are no depths to which we won’t sink to get a good tip,” and I’m not sure if he’s making a pun or not. Although he does seem to have lightened up since last season.

Rocky reminds me of Audrey Landers from the original Dallas, except I like Audrey Landers. Rocky is one of those airhead girls who is desperate for attention that guys who don’t know any better will drool over and girls will roll their eyes at. We’ve all had one in our orbit at one time or another. They’re the ones who shamelessly flirt with your boyfriend and then don’t understand what they did wrong.

Kate doesn’t want to get her hair wet, so she wears a head to toe bright red…something.  She still gets an 8. Rocky is wearing a pink wig and is reminding me of Meghan Edmonds on Watch What Happens Live, making me like her even less. Everyone has a great time and it’s nice to see everyone getting along – crew and guests.

I think Kate has a crush on Dean. They’ve come a long way from that first charter. Time for the Greek party!

There’s an ad for a Cinderella movie I’ve never heard of. Helena Bonham Carter is the fairy godmother and it looks pretty good. Real Housewives of New York 100th Episode Special – this Thursday! An ad too, for Teresa “checking in” on RHONJ. That whole situation is just sad. They seem like obnoxious people – although the eldest daughter is turning out nicely – but I think the court wanted to make an example of them because they’re on TV and they were treated unfairly. I’ve watched them for so long, they’re like unbearable cousins that I have to tolerate on holidays. I don’t like them that much, but I don’t wish them ill either. Like I do you-know-who. Just kidding! Karma and all that.

OMG – Rocky has won the diving contest, although she had said she was a Junior Olympic diving champ some years ago. She also gets to be the mermaid. I’d be jealous of that – what girl hasn’t wanted to be, or at least see a mermaid? – but I don’t think I really want to wear one of those tails. It looks like it would be hot, as well as a real disadvantage when having to go to the bathroom.

Wow. The strawberry compote must be something. One of the guests is licking the glass it was served in.

Amy is trying to teach Rocky how to be a good stew. Good luck with that. Which is what I say when what I really mean is, all the luck in the world isn’t going to help you. Sure enough, Rocky sees that it’s work and can’t possibly.

The towline has become entangled in the propeller, so someone is going to have to dive down and get it off of there.  Eddie goes, because it’s kinda sorta his fault, since he should have been on top of whoever was supposed to be watching.

The tip is “20 large,” as Captain Lee puts it. Right now, everyone is glad Don skipped out. (It comes out to 2 grand each.) The Captain wants them all to stay in tonight because he wants the boat cleaned up and shipshape for the next charter. Emile asks the Captain if he and Rocky can go to dinner off the boat, and reminds me of asking my dad if I could go out on a date. Captain Lee gives them 2 hours, and says he wishes someone would take him out to dinner. I totally volunteer.

Uh-oh, Eddie is talking to his girlfriend and we all know that long distance relationships rarely work out.  It’s not good when every other word is an F-bomb and they’re not talking about doing it. Eddie ends up threatening to hang up, hangs up, and then throws the phone. Why does everyone always throw the phone? I decided to throw a plate once when I was angry, just to see what satisfaction it gives. All I got was a broken plate and a mess to clean up.

Emile gets super wasted – no nookie tonight! No eros on the Eros.

My Fab 40th

I’m watching this, but there isn’t much to say. You can’t really invest in the “characters” because it’s a one-shot deal. And it’s kind of like going to a shower. It’s great if it’s yours, but if not, they’d better have liquor.

September 3, 2015 — GH & Some Lost Secrets

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

General Hospital

Adding “the shipments” to the list of generic terms the PC mob uses. I’ll bet they’re secretly selling Amway. For the love of God, someone please say the name of the kid-whose-name-I-can-never-remember. I finally got the names down on MasterChef though Major points for me!

WHAT HAPPENED TO SLOANE??? That’s not Sloan. Who is that guy and what happened to the handsome one? All right, I’ll take the buzzcut, just bring him back. This guy reminds me of Beau Bridges. (No offense to Beau, but he just ain’t the other Sloane.) Seeing Sloane’s lovesickness over Anna has given me the earworm of Meatloaf’s “I Would Do Anything For Love,” except Sloan would do that too.

Somebody Morgan’s age (TJ! It’s TJ! That’s his name!) shouldn’t have that bad of a hangover. Geez, where are the days when young people went straight to brunch? If he keeps going the way he’s going, I might actually start liking Sonny. I even stopped watching GH for a while when it became The Sonny Show. While I love the spy stuff – ah, the days of the Ice Princess, the Wellington Dog, and Casey the alien (yeah, I know, I’m the only one who liked that storyline, but, Brad Lockerman) – I’ve always felt that if I want to watch mob doings, I’ll watch Goodfellas.

Is it me, or did Hayden’s hair color change when she was unconscious for so long in the hospital? Those crazy nurses!

Question. If Jublia is so great, how come the foot playing tennis still has fungus on its toes at the end of the match? The ridiculous things that bother me…

The Real Housewives of New York: Secrets Revealed

I love how they come up with new ways to milk the season. Secrets Revealed is the new Lost Footage. I’m glad they changed the title because “lost footage” seriously insults my intelligence. I have this mental picture of Andy Cohen hiding film clips in his desk until the season is over. Oddly enough, we often get some of the best footage out of the extra episodes. New earworm: “Save the Best for Last.”

Maybe there is hope. Bethenny is talking about how she was practically living on the street 6 or 7 years ago, and now she’s a skabillionaire. Although I don’t exactly have her energy.  Dorinda found an old love letter email from her late husband, Richard, that he wrote while she was sleeping. He talks about wanting to wake her, but they have plenty of years for that. Tears in everyone’s eyes, including mine.

OMG. Heather actually stopped in the middle of what she was saying and said she didn’t really care, it was basically too stupid a topic to continue with. That reminded me of the time when I was taking a musical comedy class. (You could really sing anything; it didn’t have to be from a musical.) This girl stopped in the middle of her song and said she never realized how idiotic the lyrics were, and sat down.

Sonja was defensive and needy? Has there been a time when she wasn’t? BTW, for all Sonja’s yapping about how the ladies talk about her, she sure had a lot to say about Kristen’s husband being caught up in that Ashley Madison business. My love for Sonja has waned this season. I don’t know if it’s too much drinking or what, but she seemed more unhinged than eccentric. Ow! That was my reaction to the knife in my heart when Kristen talked about breaking out her wedding dress for her 10th anniversary. Kristen seems surprised her wedding dress still fits. Really? She doesn’t look like she has an ounce of body fat. She couldn’t possibly have been thinner 10 years ago. Carole tries on the dress too. That seems kind of weird to me. I understand wanting to try them on at a store, even if you’re not the one getting married, but not somebody’s already-been-worn dress.

Ha-ha! Ramona just called Heather and Carole “Harold.” Ugh! I hate when Ramona gets all huggy/clingy. It usually happens after she’s done something awful and wants forgiveness. She makes me think of a sloth clinging to a tree. Or worse, a spider wrapping web material around a fly.

WHAT’RE YA DOIN’ HERE WITHOUT DORINDA?!

August 27, 2015 — GH, NYC & Real Time TV

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

General Hospital

Love Carly’s lowlights! I see everyone is wandering around the jail unattended now.  If I ever decide to commit a crime, I’m doing it in Port Charles.  I actually like Ava.  I barely even remember Connie Falconeri, so who cares? I thought Sonny was pretty nasty to Ava regarding Avery too. Did he make that baby all by himself? One thing I do remember is that scene in the mausoleum, and he was definitely on board (and on a few other things) there.

As you already know, I’m more about the action stuff than the romantic stuff, but I do think Nathan and Maxi are super cute(not to be confused with Hello Kitty). Whatever happened to “super couples” anyway? I’m still disappointed over Luke and Tracy parting ways. I really liked them together. Dammit, Tony Geary! You ruined everything and shattered all my dreams.

Lots of exposition today.  Did they get an influx of new viewers?  I know all this; let’s move on.

I’m hoping Wile E. Coyote makes a jail appearance and drops an anvil from ACME on Morgan’s head. He’s soooo whiny. But I’m getting the feeling not a whole lot is going to happen today. Yeah, it’s Thursday. …zzzzzz…..

William DeVry is really a good actor, but I’ve never been able get into Julian in any way, shape or form. Not even when he’s doing push-ups.

Since not much is happening, here’s a story.

Many years ago, there was a fantasy camp called Daytime Encounters in Manhattan.  You spent the day with several soap actors and other people in the business.  They did Q&A panels, but even better, you got to work with them.  There was a soap scene written for the event, they had auditions for the parts, provided lunch, and had a hair and makeup team to get you ready. After the scene was filmed, everyone watched it and got a copy. Since I went to acting school and had dabbled in a few show bizzy things, this sounded like a lot of fun. I checked out their website, and unfortunately, it cost a bundle. Somewhere around 500 bucks. So I signed up for future information, just in case I won LOTTO.

Maybe about 6 months later, I got an email from the Fine Living Network (which I don’t think exists anymore). They told me that if I’d allow them to interview me for a show called Fantasy Camps, they’d pay my way to the event. This time, Daytime Encounters would be using actors from One Life To Live, which had always been my favorite of the soaps. They didn’t have to ask twice.

The night before, a cameraman and sound guy came out to my house for an at home interview. They knew I’d once done some acting and asked me if I had any scrapbooks (of course!) and wanted to film me looking at them. I seriously hoped I wouldn’t come off like Miss Havisham, covered in cobwebs, still waiting for the right part to come along after 30 years. At the time we had three dogs – a Golden Retriever (the totally misnamed Einstein), a German Shepherd (Madison) and a Pekingese (Juliet). My husband had taken them outside so they wouldn’t disrupt things, but the cameraman thought it would be cool to include them. This is it! I thought. Juliet’s chance to be my shining star. She was (and still is) the smartest and funniest dog I know, and I was sure she’d be amazing on camera.

Well, you know how pets can make a liar out of you. The two big dogs just stood there, acting like they’d never seen toys, sticks, or even people before, while Juliet barked incessantly at the cameraman. “Pick her up and give her a kiss,” the cameraman said. I did, and she tried to bite me on the nose. Some best friend and some shining star. Through the magic of editing, somehow it didn’t end up looking like the fiasco it was.

HA…HA…HA!  Something finally happened. Rick the weasel has been arrested for Silas’s murder. Huh. I hadn’t even considered him.

The event was fantastic and I learned quite a bit about the soap world, especially from Ilene Kristen, who pulled no punches in telling us what a nightmare it could be. There were about 20-25 “civilian” participants, with 3 of us being there on Fine Living’s dime. Throughout the day, they would pull us aside for mini-interviews, asking us various questions regarding our interest in soaps and how we were feeling about what was going on. I didn’t get a huge part in the scene (that seemed to be reserved for those who had done this before), but it was a funny one, and I managed to milk it for all it was worth. I must have done something right with the interviews too, because when I got a copy of the show later, it looked like I was the only one interviewed. It was an exhausting day – at one point, I swear I wanted to say “No more pictures! Please!” – but an experience I’ll never forget. And won’t have to, since I have the tapes. It also set me on the straight and narrow with my eating plan, since I saw the tapes.

Oooh, what “truth” is Franco going to reveal?

The Real Housewives of New York

Ha! They tried to fool me by sticking in another episode on a Thursday, but since I’ve been out-of-sync with the day of the week all week, I checked the guide early.

Backing up for just a moment. It’s no wonder Bethenny’s boob fell out of her dress when Sonja told her about spitting out her tooth. She was pulling and tugging at that dress all night. Please. You can afford to buy something that fits and is both stylish and comfortable.

While I too, wondered for a long time if Sonja’s collection would ever materialize, and I understand the skepticism of the ladies, Heather hasn’t exactly been the support system she claims to have been. All of the Wives always think we have short term memory loss and none of this is on film. What sticks out in my mind was how she asked Sonja if her clothing was going to be sold in K-Mart. Not that I think there’s anything wrong with K-Mart (well, there’s something wrong with my K-Mart, but it has nothing to do with the merchandise). It has a lot of fine brands like Martha Stewart, but in this instance, I thought it was a put-down. Heather, you know damn well that Sonja Morgan, of the Whatever Morgans she says she’s from, is not going to sell her clothing line in K-Mart and she’s going to find that remark insulting. You’ve been on this show for a couple of seasons now.

I wouldn’t go anywhere without Dorina. I like Dorinda. Even if she does get overly sensitive when she’s had too many martinis. That was a great episode when she took the trip to England with Carole. I like Carole a lot too.

WAKE UP, RAMONA! No, really, she fell asleep. Can’t say as I blame her. I’ve heard these reunions are a 12-hour day that starts very early. It must feel weird to wear a ball gown first thing in the morning.

Make a note: The 100th episode special is on September 17th.

The burning issue of the season, or at least Turks and Caicos: the naked man incident or what is girl code cool? I totally understand the point of not leaving strangers wander around a house full of your friends and their belongings. (Apparently, there was staff at the house though, which hadn’t occurred to me before.) No one wants to wake up as a headline. However, Heather totally overreacted. I’ve done it myself, once screaming at a neighbor/friend who left their key in my mailbox and failed to tell me. I get safety and security, but it wasn’t necessary to bounce LuAnn out of bed after the fact, especially since Ramona played innocent and sent her there. Really? You believe something that woman has to say? It did give the Countess the quote of the season, as well as a chance to show off her slammin’ body. I don’t get this girl code business either. A lot of rules must have been added since I was single. Back in my day (gather ‘round as I sit in my rocker), girl code basically meant that you didn’t date a friend’s ex or move in on the man she already had her eye on. Ah, for simpler times.

Travel advice from Princess Carole: Do not leave your luggage, or your men, unattended.

Oh man, they are still arguing about this. Aww, they’re hugging and making up now. Applause all around. Now everyone is hugging. Is the show over?

Nope. Andy is back, patting everyone on the back for acting like adults. Somewhat.

Heather has just redeemed herself by saying 50 isn’t old.

See ya next time, girls!

I’m looking forward to Ladies of London, if only to stop seeing the commercial. I love Fergie, but I’m tired of the earworm that is “London Bridge.”

Real Time TV

Not sure what I’ll talk about over the weekend – although I’m sure I’ll think of something – since there’s never anything on TV. Do they think everyone has a life? I just don’t understand why they can’t spread the wealth instead of saving it all for Sunday night. Remember when the most exciting thing on Sunday night was 60 Minutes? I haven’t worked in an office for over 20 years, but I still get a knot in my stomach when I hear that clock ticking, because, Monday morning.  Sunday night periodically becomes the cluster of shows I have to untangle, and figure out how to watch all of them. Then, the nerve, they have to stick in a season of Once Upon A Time occasionally to really make it complicated. As it’s on ABC, it has to be watched in real time because they only show it once. Or DVR’d, meaning it will fall into the black hole never to be seen again. I do sometimes use On Demand. It’s come in really handy when there’s a regular network show I want to see, like Zoo, which I’m embarrassed to say is trumped on Tuesday by whichever Wives are on.

So just remember – be cool.

August 25, 2015 — PC, NYC, a Ship at Sea & Some Maids

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

Devious Maids

It’s not that I don’t have a DVR, but I prefer to watch shows in real time, so I watched this at midnight last night. My DVR fear is that if I start recording things, it will end up like the black hole that was once my VHS tape collection. I already have General Hospital episodes that are 2 years old on there.

Kind of like Murder She Wrote, but grislier with a more youthful vibe, I really like this show. One of the reasons is the friendship between the women. While they have their ups and downs, they always come together to support one another. Although I liked it at the beginning, I drifted away from Desperate Housewives before the series ended. Maybe that’s why. The women were just too cruel to each other.

I know, I know. Says the one who’s addicted to The Real Housewives.

Not that I thought she would ever have trouble finding work, it’s great to see Susan Lucci back on the small screen. She’s a natural in the role of Genevieve, whose over-the-topness is not too far from Erica Kane, who, if you remember, once shouted down a bear. I loved seeing her paired with John O’Hurley, and was sorry that he only stuck around for a few episodes. Johnny, we hardly knew ye.

Right now, since it’s the finale, all the murders have been confessed to and they’ve blown the place up in cliffhanger fashion. I hope I don’t have to wait too long for the next season. The last time, it was so long, I practically forgot what the show was about. I long for the old days of a September to May season, with summer reruns and the occasional new show in the off-time. Now, it seems like they use a dart board to decide on air dates. Seasons could be at any time of the year, or split in half to get more play, with sometimes an entire year in between. (Thanks, Mad Men!) I am, however, grateful for the repeat episodes. There was a time when they were annoying, but with all the great TV to choose from, it’s made it easier to catch everything.

General Hospital

I managed to tear myself away from BRAVO’s Below Deck marathon. Can’t wait for the new season starting tonight! Since it comes on after The Real Housewives of New Yorkpart 2 of the reunion –my head could very well explode.

Glad to see Tracy today – another one of my favorites! Jane Elliot has it right too, with the way she’s keeping it real as she ages. She looks good and she looks like herself. Now that we all know that Denise is really Ava, I’ll miss Denise. She was a load of fun! I hope Ava keeps Denise’s dark hair – it looks absolutely stunning with her light eyes. You might think me superficial, commenting on a character or actor’s appearance, but these are some of the thoughts that go through my head as I watch. Don’t tell me you don’t have them too. If you’re looking for a real recap, go to the site for the show. Or Vulture. I love their recaps; they often make me literally LOL. That’s right. This Macy’s Santa is sending you to Gimbel’s if they have what you want and I don’t. But, my friends do say they enjoy watching TV with me.

Roger Howarth (now known as Franco) has been my favorite soap actor ever since he came on the One Life to Live scene. Apparently, a lot of fans felt that way, since his character was originally supposed to have a limited run, and Todd ended up running all the way to Port Charles many years later, even though ABC made a mess of the crossover. One of my fondest soap memories was Todd stalking blind Nora. It was Christmastime and I’d just brought a neighbor’s dog back from our daily walk. She had a huge box of chocolate truffles on the coffee table (my neighbor, not the dog), and had told me to help myself. (She was a literal size 0 and only drank half a can of soda at a time, so who was I not to help her here?) I put the TV on, and actually ate some bonbons while I was watching a soap. I thought, it doesn’t get any better than this.

Moving on. For a place that’s rife with criminals, Port Charles certainly has a lax jail system, along with keeping both men and women in the same holding area. Come to think of it, the hospital isn’t exactly on top of security either. Remind me never to get sick there if someone is trying to murder me.

That’s right, Morgan. It doesn’t matter that Denise is really Ava. It doesn’t make you any less of a cheater. So please quit whining.

The Real Housewives of New York

Having lived a good portion of my life in the city, these girls are high on my must watch list.

Oh, Countess, can you take a clue from Princess Elsa and let it go? Why is she still hanging on to being angry about Carole seeing her niece’s ex? The weirdest thing about this is that the Countess seems to be okay with an older woman and a younger man together if they’re just having sex, but she frowns on them having a relationship. Huh? So now that Carole has been seeing 28-year-old Adam for some time, she’s gotten more annoyed. I even doubt the niece is hanging on this hard. Although the LuAnn does get the prize for the classic line of the decade, “Be cool. Don’t be all like, uncool.” That has to be one of the best things I’ve ever heard on any Wives show ever. I want that on a T-shirt.

WHAT ARE YA DOIN’ HERE WITHOUT DORINDA? Hahahahaha! I just had to say that.

I go back and forth with Sonja. On one hand, I adore her. She lives the way she wants to, and often reminds me of one of the Edies (Beale) in her eccentric way of presenting herself. On the other hand, I can understand the frustration of the other ladies in dealing with her. In some ways, she lives in another time, and she has to get it through her head that it’s a bad idea for a woman alone to get blackout drunk at a bar. Please, stop doing that before something bad happens. I was proud of her for finally getting her clothing collection off the ground though. For getting anything off the ground actually. And the clothes are gorgeous. Brava, Sonja! Now about that toaster oven….

I’ve met Kristen and although underused on the show, she’s a lovely person. She’s one of those people who, when you talk to her, make you feel like you’re the most important person in the room. I don’t think Bethenny has always given her a fair shake, and I also don’t believe that printed quotes are always accurate. (Really, Bethenny? Did you really say they were? SMH) Throughout the season, we saw Kristen struggle with her husband, Josh, over priorities, as his seemed to be more about work than family. I was very sad to hear he was one of those outed in the Ashley Madison data breach. I sincerely hope they’re able to work it out. He’s another husband I’m not crazy about, but I didn’t marry him and I hate to see her hurt.

Now we finally get to the Ramona dirt. Well, really the Mario dirt. As much as I dislike her – another pot stirrer who thinks saying “I’m sorry” makes everything all right – I wouldn’t wish a cheating spouse on anyone. And no woman should have to see the other woman in their kitchen. At first, it seemed like we were seeing a different Ramona this season, but it didn’t take long before her evil twin came back in full force. And hey, if you don’t want that gorgeous guy just because he’s a bartender (news flash: that’s not an awful career), I have plenty of single friends who will take him.

This is hysterical. The saga of the dress Ramona swiped from Bethenny. Apparently, she was given an expensive piece (Halston Heritage) to wear on Bethenny’s show and walked off with it. Despite many attempts to get it back, including giving her another pricey dress in the hopes of a trade, Ramona has managed to dodge the return. Now she claims she shouldn’t have to since Bethenny’s show was canceled. Ramona. It. Does. Not. Belong. To. You.

Why is Ramona drinking rosé instead of pinot? Did I miss something?

Below Deck

I’m so glad to see this show again! I love it so much. Maybe because I’d like to take up residence on that yacht and sail around for the rest of my life. And I adore Captain Lee. I was sad to see that most of the old crew have been replaced, especially Ben the Australian chef, but it’s TBD if I like this group as much. I’m keeping an open mind.

Chief Stew Kate has returned. I have a love/hate relationship with Kate. What she calls “stoic and professional” can often come off as cold and unfeeling, yet she has a great sense of humor at times. Like last season when one of the primary guests was being a real d*ck and she folded the towel on his bed accordingly. When called on it, she claimed it was a “rocketship,” but we all knew better, and the guest actually redeemed himself by finding it funny and tipping big.

Speaking of asshat guests, during the marathon, I caught my least favorite, Timothy Sykes. An entrepreneur who made a fortune in penny stocks, he was one of the rudest guests ever. Apparently his daughter girlfriend is a fan of “simple foods” (in other words, she has an uneducated palate) and wasn’t too appreciative of Chef Ben’s artistry. Timothy also acted like a big baby over the internet connection not being up to par. While the crew is no stranger to complaints, this idiot took it a step further. When it came time to give the tip, he showed Captain Lee a wad of bills and then dramatically took a quarter of the wad out, citing the above offenses and telling Lee that’s why he was reducing the tip.

Since I’d never heard of this guy before, after seeing him again, I googled him. The first link I saw was to a Tweet he’d just made, saying if anyone was watching Below Deck, it was all editing and he really had a great time. And then some buy-my-crap link. Normally, I avoid Twitter for the most part. The last thing I need is more anti-social social media in my life. I just couldn’t resist though. Unless immediately after his arrogant display with the money, he patted Captain Lee on the back and said, “Just kidding,” while handing him the rest of the tip, I fail to see how editing had anything to do with him being a d-bag. So I told him that. Not that I think he gives a flying, but he did bring it up. And Chef Ben did end up making his daughter girlfriend those casadias, so what was the big deal?

You can see my once-a-year tweet here: http://tinyurl.com/o6jp94q

OMG THE FOOD!!! I’ve never even been on a cruise, but I want to go straight to charter.

The first guests of the season want a “foam party.” One of the crews remarked that they hadn’t heard that since the 90s. I’ve never heard that. And I wasn’t even on drugs in the 90s. The primary guest (the guy who’s footing the bill), Steve, is already rip-roaring drunk and in the “I love all you guys” phase. Hope he doesn’t go into weepy before they get to the foam. Won’t they be slipping in foam? Okay, there are glow sticks involved. Those I know about.

OMG THE FOOD!!!

Oh Lord, Steve says this has been his dream. I’m sorry. This is possibly the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen. Now he’s hitting on the 2nd Stew. Yep, we should be getting to weepy or sleepy at any moment.

From the previews, it looks like Chef Ben is coming back.

OMG THE FOOD!!!

My Fab 40th

How can celebrating a 40th birthday be a series? I guess I’ll find out.

Well, we’re halfway through, and I’ll probably stick it out, but…rich people’s problems.