Tag Archives: Top Chef

June 18, 2020 – A Best Of Flashback, Top Chef Crowned, Fan Fave, Juneteenth Ideas, Is She Or Not, Thirsty, Watching Stars, Coming Up, a Mansion, Gordon’s Back, Say It Three Times & Dad


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

And the GH Flashback roulette wheel says… October 15th, 2015. I heard on an ad that this week is the best of Sonny and Carly, which brings cohesion to the randomness. Sonny surprised Carly with a wedding in the hospital chapel, that Maxie jumped through hoops to put together in record time. Josslyn and Kristina looked like babies, Sabrina attended with Michael, and Josslyn played the Wedding March on the flute. I assumed it was actually her playing, and was impressed, since the flute is very difficult to master.

Paul showed up at the gallery, while trying to set up Anna via text using the name Sloane. Paul told Ava to be prepared for the dismantling of the Corinthos organization. His plan was about to come to fruition. He told Ava that Carrrlos’s fate and Anna’s were going to dovetail (who uses that word, except in reference to carpentry?). Ava asked if it was a coincidence, but Paul said it was careful planning. He wanted Ava to launder some money via art collectors he was going to send, but Ava wasn’t keen on the idea. Paul asked if she wanted to go to prison for Connie’s murder, since he had her confession on tape. Ava said she was afraid of losing Avery, and Paul relented, saying he wasn’t heartless, and Ava would be of no use to him if her mind was elsewhere. He told her to deal with the custody case first.

Old Jordan wanted to talk to Anna about Carrrlos’s disappearance, since Anna was the last one to see him. Jordan said her leads had gone cold, and Mayor Lomax was breathing down her neck.

While talking to Dillon at the pier, Maxie saw a body in the water, and Dillon called the police. Jordan determined it was Carrrlos, which wasn’t hard since he’d had his wallet on him. When Paul showed up, she said Carrrlos had been shot at close range. That explained why he avoided detection for so long – he was dead. Yep. That will do it. Paul suggested Sonny had gotten his revenge.

Sonny and Carly said their vows. Sonny told Carly that she saved his life every day, and he was blessed that she chose him. Carly said she’d had a taste of life without him, and promised that neither one of them was going anywhere without the other. Dante’s phone rang during the vows, and he stepped aside to take it. Bobbie suggested Sonny make a change, so no one else would get hurt. Dante told them that Carrrlos had been pulled from the harbor, and he was dead. Sabrina freaked, and Dante went to the station. Morgan told Sonny and Carly that Carrrlos had gotten what he deserved, and Sonny said he didn’t ask for retaliation. Morgan said they were looking at him like they thought he did it, and told them they could think what they wanted to; it was his wedding gift to them, and enjoy it while it lasted. When he left, Sonny told Carly that he thought Morgan wished he had shot Carrrlos, but he would have heard about it if Morgan had done it. He explained that Ava had let the Five Families (not a restaurant) that Carrrlos had shot Sonny and acted alone. The only one who could dispute it was Carrrlos, and he wasn’t talking. Carly said that was convenient for Ava, and Sonny said she was up to her lying neck in it. Sabrina told Michael that she’d known Carrrlos most of his life, and Carrrlos had done awful things, but didn’t deserve to get shot.

Anna went to the gallery, and told Ava that she knew it wasn’t Carrrlos who shot Sonny, since he was on the run for killing Duke. Why would he escape Port Charles, then come back to shoot Sonny? She said Ava claiming that’s what happened implied she had something to hide, and asked who Ava was covering for. Paul called Anna, and told her to meet him at Pier 54.

Nathan assumed that Valerie was pregnant after Maxie found a positive pregnancy test in the trash, and Valerie gave him the business about jumping to conclusions. Valerie saw Maxie in the interrogation room after she gave her statement, and Maxie told her it was like a scene from a scary movie, and kept playing in her head. She told Valerie that she knew Valerie and Dillon were having sex, and Valerie said Dillon was a great guy, but that was a no, and had never happened.  Maxie asked whose baby Valerie was worried about carrying. Valerie said she didn’t know what Maxie was  talking about, and didn’t think Maxie did either. Maxie said Valerie had thrown a positive pregnancy test in the trash, and Valerie said Maxie had assumed because she was near the trash can, it must be hers. She suggested the next time Maxie decided to go snooping, get her facts straight. In the meantime, Dante told Dillon to stay the hell away from his wife.

Sonny joked that he and Carly were going to Iowa for their honeymoon, and Lulu told Bobbie that she and Dante were in discussion about expanding their family.

Ava told Paul that Sonny knew she’d lied about Carrrlos, and was asking inconvenient questions, but Paul said he had everything under control.

Carly cuddled with Sonny in his hospital room, and Sonny said it wasn’t the way he’d pictured their honeymoon, but it did feel like Des Moines. She thought it was more like Cedar Rapids.

Top Chef – Finale

The chefs were challenged with cooking the meal of their lives. The final three were Bryan, who the crown had eluded for more than a decade; Melissa, who had more wins than anyone; and Stephanie, the private chef underdog, who had proven she had skills to be feared. The prize was a feature in Food and Wine magazine, an appearance at the Food and Wine festival in Aspen, and $250K. Not bad. I love that magazine, and that’s a nice chunk of change. Bryan said he’d slap them in the face with heart and soul, and we flashed back to the Italian chefs saying there was no soul in his food. Padma tasked them with making the best progressive four-course meal of their lives – no twists. They would be serving it to the best chefs from all over world. Kevin, Lee Anne, and Brian full of Malarkey came out to give their support as sous chefs. Gregory would have been there instead of Brian, but he was still battling back issues. The chefs drew knives for picking order, and Stephanie was first, choosing Brian full of Malarkey, for his enthusiasm and skills. Stephanie also admitted that during Restaurant Wars she fell in love with him. Not literally. Brian chose Kevin, who said, let’s get the band back together, which left Melissa with Lee Anne. Melissa said they’d never worked together, but Lee Ann knew Asian flavors, and was a beast in the kitchen. She thought they’d do well. Padma told them they’d be shopping in the food hub of Florence, and would have five hours to prep and cook back at the Renaissance Tuscany. They were to make the meal as cohesive as possible, and Tom said the judges expected nothing but the best.

Melissa said her mission was to marry Asian flavor with what she’d learned in Italy, bringing Italy to her heritage, so it would portray her adventure. While this isn’t Project Runway, I have to mention that Lee Anne was wearing the coolest fried-egg-and-bacon crocheted scarf. If I was crafty that way, I’d be making one starting tonight. Bryan said he and Stephanie were yin and yang; their minds were one. In the evening, the judges turned the tables, and Tom, Padma, and Gail did the cooking. The chefs were met outside by Tom, who was doing some rustic farmhouse cooking on the grill, which gave Melissa an idea for her main course. They all sat down to eat together, and Padma wished them luck, telling them to cook their hearts out. After dinner, Stephanie called best friend Kristen, who was also the Season 10 winner. Stephanie said she thought her chances of winning were one in three. Melissa called her mom, and Bryan called his brother Michael.

After three hours in the kitchen, the judges were served the first two courses. You knew it was good by the way they were shoveling it in, especially one guy who reminded me of the drive-in guy Joe Bob Briggs and was wearing a shirt with steer on it. Later, I found out he was an Italian butcher named Dario. Gail said Bryan was a great technician, but this time showed soul and love in his food as well. Drive-in Bob Dario said, mama mia! and the main course came out. Melissa made grilled squab; Bryan went with blackened monkfish; and Stephanie made a veal dish. Padma said the food was universally wonderful, and food editor Nilou Motamed said she didn’t like squab, but was now a convert. At this point, I was pretty sure Melissa was going to win. Then, OMG THE DESSERTS CAME OUT. They were all to die for, and I’m not sure which one I wanted more; Bryan’s dark chocolate and ice cream thing, to which Dario responded, mmm… cardamom; Stephanie’s sticky toffee pudding (I don’t know what the hell that is, but give me two servings); or Melissa’s tea-infused tiramisu with a crunchy topping. When the dinner was done, the chefs applauded themselves, and then the judges applauded them when they were called back out. During the final discussion, Dario teared up over how Melissa respected the Italian traditions with her dessert. He said, a butcher who cries, how embarrassing, prompting one of the other guest judges to come over and give him a hug.

When the chefs were brought out to meet with the usual judges, plus Nilou, for the final time, Tom said he thought they all cooked the best meal of their lives, and Padma said she saw the story of their lives on the plates. She relayed that Hunter Lewis from Food and Wine found Bryan’s beets beguiling. Say that three times real fast. Tom said Bryan had erased the impression that he couldn’t cook with soul and heart. Gail said that Melissa had joined the Asian and Italian cultures, and told her about Dario getting emo over her tiramisu. Melissa said they were all artists who loved hearing that their journeys were understood. Stephanie joked that she was going for fan favorite. She had done damage to people who loved her by being sad, and this showed them that she was okay. Tom said, sometimes the voyage is more important than the destination, because you find out what you’re made of. You have to go deeper, and what comes out is who you are. They all made that journey, but there could only be one Top Chef. Arriving for the announcement were Melissa’s mom, Bryan’s brother, and Stephanie’s husband.

With that, Padma told Melissa, she was Top Chef. In Melissa’s interview, she said it had been a wild adventure, but this time she’d done it for herself, and wasn’t trying to earn her father’s approval. She wanted to prove to herself that she could achieve a goal that she’d set. In Stephanie’s interview, she said she accomplished what she’d wanted to do. She hadn’t felt good about the mental space she was in since her brother died. This would give everyone something else to talk about for a while. In Bryan’s interview, he said he’d learned a lot about himself. There were sixteen Top Chefs, but he was the only one who’d done what he did. He’d been runner-up three times, but was never doing this again. Melissa said, once you believe in yourself, nothing can stop you. She knew it sounded cliché, but the world was her oyster. She could do anything now.

👓 On Watch What Happens Live (@home in the Hamptons – @must be nice), Padma and Tom were guests, and Melissa made an appearance. Padma announced Melissa was also the fan favorite, netting her another $10K. Melissa donated that win to Black Visions Collective, the Trevor Project, and Asian Americans for Equality. And for that, Andy gave the night’s mazel.

🥧 Baking For the Teenth…

An idea to celebrate Juneteenth.


📺 Watchlist…

Some Juneteenth suggestions for your viewing pleasure.


📚 For the Bookworm In You…

A Juneteenth reading list.


🍑 Pour the Nene Tea…

A Twitter user suggested her ego has become bigger than her entertainment value. I think they might be right.



🥃 Give That Lady a Drink…

Like not every single one of them is thirsty. It’s not like they’re on the show to educate people about… anything.


🛸 Where No Man Has Gone…

But you can go for free.


📑 Head Start…

A list of what’s coming to the small screen, and not.


👠 Sometimes She’s All Of Us…

While probably none of us will ever have her closet, or will even be able to afford one of her shoes, Sutton sometimes reminds me of how the audience feels. Kind of horrified.


🛶 Unchart This…

You can catch Gordon in Uncharted on the National Geographic (NatGeo) channel on Sundays at 10 pm. It’s also free on YouTube.


📽 Who Can Take a Sunrise…

Candyman returns in a spiritual sequel. Tony Todd and Vanessa Williams will be making return appearances, and Jordan Peele wrote the screenplay, so that’s enough for me.


🤸‍♀️ Is It Friday Again Yet…?

Father’s Day is coming up this weekend, and here’s hoping you have/had a good relationship with yours. My dad was the best. He had a wonderful sense of humor, was ahead of his time, and the fairest person I’ve ever known. Stay safe, stay celebratory, and stay in touch with your family, be they blood relatives or chosen.

June 11, 2020 – Finn Proposes Again, Tinsley Gets Her Wish, the Chefs Go To Parma, a Michelin Star, Funkey Pasta, Gone Not Forgotten, Conning Online & All Yours


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Today’s GH Flashback, from May 21st, 2019, continued with the 2019 Nurse’s Ball. After Finn’s ring went rolling out from the wings to Anna’s feet, Robert told Finn, don’t just stand there; go pick it up. Finn got the ring, then got down on one knee. He told Anna it wasn’t how he wanted to do this, and asked her to marry him. She said yes, and the crowd cheered. Cameron told Josslyn that Oscar had him record a message for her that he wanted her see tonight. He left the recording there, saying it had been Oscar’s last chance to talk to Josslyn. Since he’d recorded it, he already knew what it said, and thought Oscar would want her to hear it alone. My bad, Doc was Doc, and they were on to Ryan by this time, who had blown up a house in Canada, sending Laura and Curtis flying. (It’s all coming back now. Ava and Doc got together to try and draw Ryan out of hiding after he was discovered to be alive and well and killing again.) Doc agreed with Ava to stick to the plan. Kristina told Sam not to get too close to Shiloh, telling Sam that he was a cult leader, and more than a liar.

Josslyn watched Oscar’s recording, and he said he knew if she was watching this, he was gone. He wanted her to live life to the fullest, starting with tonight, and wanted her to sing their song for both of them. Obrecht sang Guilty, and Franco joined her on stage. Every time I hear this song, it makes me want to work out. It’s used in the background on one of my workout videos, and I’m like a trained pony. Josslyn got dressed, and went to the Ball, saying she was doing it for Oscar. Shiloh tried to smooth talk Kristina, and told her to come home, holding out his hand. In perfect timing, Sonny showed up at just that moment, and told Shiloh to stay away from his daughter. Shiloh told Kristina that she couldn’t let her father control her forever, and his door was always open. Sonny said Shiloh’s door was going to be permanently closed. He’d messed with the wrong family, and it was going to cost him everything. Alexis took Kristina away, and Kristina wondered why no one was doing anything about Sam falling under Shiloh’s spell. Without missing a beat, Shiloh moved on to Lucas, and tried to talk him into taking classes at Dawn of Day like Brad was.

Willow literally ran into Nina, spilling her drink, and Nina got pissed off. Willow said the one good thing about losing her job was that she didn’t have to take Nina’s crap anymore. Shiloh kept an eye on Willow, while Cameron practiced backstage, and thought about all the people not there tonight. Josslyn arrived, and told Jax and Carly about the message she’d gotten from Oscar. She said she didn’t know if she was there yet, but one step at a time. Cameron sang a song that may or may not have been called You’re My Star. Afterwards, Josslyn thanked him for bringing her Oscar’s message and being someone Oscar could trust. Kristina wouldn’t leave without talking to Sam, but Neil said that wouldn’t be wise. Since Kristina was still vulnerable, she couldn’t help Sam. She said she’d leave on the condition that Sonny stay and keep an eye on Shiloh, but Sonny said she didn’t even have to ask.

Lucy told Doc that two dozen roses had arrived, and he needed to sign for them. He said he’d gotten them as a tribute for Ava, but Lucy thought the only tribute Ava deserved was poison ivy. In Canada, Laura requested a helicopter, and told the Canadian cops to alert the New York state police about Ryan. Curtis called Chase, and let him know Ryan was on his way back to Port Charles. Finn and Anna celebrated with sparkling cider, and Finn told Anna the ring was a rare Monaco blue sapphire, He’d chosen it because Monaco was where Anna first blackmailed him, and changed his life. He said it wasn’t his perfect moment, but she didn’t care, and they got busy.

Nina eavesdropped on Willow’s conversation about the child she gave up for adoption. Willow said Nina had been making her life miserable since the day they met, and no wonder Charlotte was the way she is. Nina didn’t appreciate Willow’s judgement of her parenting, and said Willow couldn’t even take care of her own child. Nina left, and Willow discovered Shiloh had eavesdropped on her and Nina. Chase alerted the PCPD and the Canadian authorities about Ryan, and Laura tried to alert Doc, but he was already knocked out in the dressing room, as Ryan took a single rose from the bouquet. The episode ended with Ava singing You’re Just Too Good To Be True.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Dorinda visits a Halloween store, and tells the clerk that her Halloween theme is voodoo. The clerk helps her get into a corset. Ben and assistant Roger meet with meet with LuAnn. In her interview, LuAnn says they’re looking for comedians. Her act is a variety show, and variety shows need comedy. They’re waiting for Sonja, and LuAnn says, she probably lost her dress on the way over. Sonja comes in wearing jumpsuit, so she probably had to go to the bathroom. In her interview, Sonja says, LuAnn is so high on life, everything is funny. She wonders if she’s getting paid, and LuAnn says she was paid the last time. In Sonja’s interview, she says LuAnn paid for half of her hair and makeup, so she did her hair herself. The comics audition, and in LuAnn’s interview, she says they’re all good, but for Marry-Eff-Kill, they have to be specific about sex and relationships. Sonja says she’s glad LuAnn included her, and in her interview, she says she’s proud of what LuAnn has built, and excited to be involved, even if she’s not getting paid. Sonja and LuAnn go over their material for the show.

Tinsley calls Leah, who asks, what the hell is going on with her and Scott? Tinsley says, it was so good. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, even though everyone was saying, just get on a plane, she wanted to be cool. But when Scott said, get on a plane with Strawberry and Shortcake, she was all in. It sounds cheesy, but felt like home; like it was real. Leah says Dorinda is putting together an evening of going to a haunted house – Blood Manor – and then out to dinner. She said Tinsley can come if she wants, and Leah wants her to come. Tinsley says she wants to go. She loves stuff like that.

Tinsley and Leah arrive at Blood Manor first, where they’re accosted outside by a zombie and a clown. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she was expecting to be attacked by Dorinda at dinner, not by a zombie on the sidewalk. Elyse shows up next, followed by Dorinda. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she’s been trying to get the group to go to Blood Manor for two years. It’s an institution. It’s scary, and she doesn’t scare easy. She’s the scarer [sic]. She puts her arm around the zombie, and says she’s finally found the man of her dreams. Elyse says, the blondes always die in the horror films. If you’re blonde, and show your boobs, you’re dead. Speaking of which, when met by the zombie and clown, Ramona freaks out, and drops her shopping bag. In her interview, she says, if that’s what it’s like outside, what is it like inside? LuAnn joins them, dressed as a cougar. In her interview, Leah says she’s aspiring to be a cougar. Sonja gets there last. No surprise. In her interview, she says this isn’t for her. She’s already high anxiety, and they’ve had nothing to drink. They go inside, and Leah doesn’t think the clown is an actor. She thinks that’s really how he is.

They inch down a darkened hallway, and the clown opens a door. It’s a typical, albeit well done, haunted house – horror film type sets, lightening flashing, loud noises, and various horror characters jumping out at them. In Tinsley’s interview, she thinks the cackling twins are Sonja and Ramona. We flash back to the two of them at the banya massage, and Tinsley might be right. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, they drop from the ceiling, and come through the walls. They’re everywhere. Outside, Ramona says she’s exhausted and almost peed her pants. They head to dinner. In Sonja’s interview, she says she could use some tequila. Something she’s familiar with; not a haunted house.

The women sit down to dinner, and Ramona says Tinsley posted on Instagram about Scott. In Sonja’s interview, she says Tinsley posted to the world, then they find out. Leah suggests they toast to Tinsley and Scott, and Tinsley says they’re back together; wooo! Leah said Tinsley told her that she and Scott were getting married. We see a clip of Tinsley and Leah in the limo, and Tinsley saying, there’s no ring yet, but she just knows it. For whatever reason, Dorinda decides they should all ignore Tinsley, and in Tinsley’s interview, she says she expected Dorinda not to ask questions, but she’s disappointed that Sonja, Ramona, and LuAnn fell under Dorinda’s spell. Elyse thinks they’ve been hard on Tinsley, and it’s unwarranted. LuAnn asks Dorinda if the conversation is registering, but Dorinda says Tinsley is running game. She’s making asses of them. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she’s not judgmental (I choke on my coffee), but don’t pull the wool over their eyes. She tells LuAnn, don’t bring life to it. In Ramona’s interview, she says Dorinda is telling her not to listen to Tinsley, and she’s in a good place with Dorinda, so she’s sticking with her. What a tool. LuAnn asks where the ring is, and Dorinda says Tinsley will love Chicago. Since she’s living in a hotel, she can pack up and go tomorrow. Tinsley says she’s happy for herself and her dogs, and Dorinda says she’s got a turkey baster. Maybe Tinsley can have a baby. Honest to God, I don’t know how this woman hasn’t been punched in the face by now. Tinsley says Dorinda is mean, and in LuAnn’s interview, she justifies Dorinda’s remarks by saying it’s been overkill about Tinsley and Scott. Wait a second. Tinsley is the one who didn’t want to talk about it, and Dorinda kept hammering at her. W… T… F…?  Elyse says she believes this is it for Tinsley, and she’s going to live happily ever after. In Leah’s interview, she says, the behavior is de classé. They should give Tinsley this one moment, but they can’t. I can tell Tinsley has had it.

Sonja goes with intern Lulu to meet with Michael and Heather from Century 21. In Sonja’s interview, she says, it’s only been phone calls up until now, but the last show blew them away. Now they want to sell her collection. She sent the pieces ahead, and Heather tells her, the quality is incredible. I’ve looked at her site, and the clothes are not only beautiful, they’re reasonably priced. In her interview, Sonja says she wants to pinch herself. Century 21 is known for luxury for less, and designers at a discount, which is what she’s all about. She says she’s so excited, and Michael says their flagship store downtown is going to make a space front and center for her collection. They also want to sell it at their Herald Square store. (For those unfamiliar with NYC, that’s where the big Macy’s is you see on the Thanksgiving parade.) In Sonja’s interview, she says she’s trying to be serious, but inside, she’s dying. This struck a chord with her, and has made her feel confident. Michael says, in the long term, they want to roll her collection out all their stores. It’s a huge opportunity for both of them. In her interview, Sonja says she needs to stay calm. Michael says they’re moving fast, and their buying team has been in touch with her people. They’ll be placing an order in the next couple of weeks. Sonja says she’s ready to start the next chapter.

Dorinda, Sonja, and Ramona share a limo. Ramona tells them that they’re looking at a warehouse, and meeting event planner Larry Scott. In her interview, Ramona says she’s having a birthday party to celebrate herself, and inviting all her girlfriends. Dorinda and Sonja realize they’re going to Long Island, when they thought they were staying in Manhattan. They go to the warehouse of Lawrence Scott Events, and in Ramona’s interview, she says he’s the premier party planner in NYC, Long Island, and the Hamptons. She tells Larry, last year, a friend made the invite list and excluded some of her girlfriends. We flash back to Ramona telling the list maker not to include Sonja. She tells him that she has 60 girlfriends to invite, and he’s shocked she has that many at her age. I’m surprised when she doesn’t react. In Sonja’s interview, she says, if Ramona mentions that she has 60 girlfriends one more time, she’s going to vomit. Larry asks what Ramona’s vision is, and she says, sophisticated jungle, or tropical. It’s her coming out party; she’s single. I guess three people in the world don’t already know that. Sonja says it’s her birthday, as well as Dorinda’s, and suggests they have a joint party, but Ramona immediately shoots that down. In Dorinda’s interview, she wonders why not a joint party? Sonja is Ramona’s real friend, and Sonja needs this. It’s an opportunity to be kind. (I choke on my coffee a second time, since that’s rich coming from Dorinda.) Ramona says she loves them, but it’s her party. In Sonja’s interview, she says, for the last couple of years, Ramona has  wanted the whole spotlight to herself. How hard is it to share a party? Ramona says she’s giving back to the girlfriends she’s known for thirty years, and it’s costing a lot of money, but Larry is giving her a good price. In her interview, Dorinda says, Ramona likes to do let’s make a deal. Dorinda doesn’t do that. She just gives them a credit card. Dorinda says, it’s Ramona’s coming out party? The next thing she’ll be having is an I-got-my-first-period party. In Ramona’s interview, she says she’s chalking it up to jealousy, because they don’t have as many girlfriends as she does. Yeah. That must be it. They sit and go over ideas while stuffing their faces with cookies, and Dorinda suggests a woman covered in sushi. Both Ramona and Larry are like, eww! Ramona says there’s no formal theme, and she wants everyone to sit where they want, and mingle. Larry says people can sometimes get cliquey, and they want to make sure the attention is on Ramona. Like this would ever be a problem. He draws a diagram, and shows her where she’ll hold court. Ramona will be the chandelier. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it’s always the Ramona show. Dorinda barely celebrates Jesus that much. She feels like she’s been kidnapped. How did this happen? They’re in a warehouse in Long Island, being ignored, and overdosing on sugar. Larry asks them to pose for a social media picture, and in her interview, Dorinda says, and now, they have to do a promo piece for Larry’s business. This has taken up a full day, and now they have to do a promo piece. Save the bullsh*t for your Hamptons friends. You’ve got the wrong audience here.

Rob brings Kier to Leah’s apartment. Leah says she’s testing recipes, and Kier makes a face. In Leah’s interview, she says, being the mom of a teen means you’re reminded every day of how you’re not cool. That’s basically what it’s like. She makes a green juice, and tries it. She says, it’s really healthy, and Rob takes a sip. He says it’s the first time he’s ever had one, and it’s not bad. In her interview, Leah says, it’s hard for a lot of people to understand their relationship. They’re like an amazing married couple, but they don’t live at the same address, and they don’t have sex. Leah asks Rob to throw out a giant plant that’s on its last legs, and Kier says she’s a waster. In Leah’s interview, she says Rob is good to have around to co-parent, but also do the man thing she doesn’t want to do. Except that one man thing. She has batteries for that. He leaves with the plant.

Ramona meets Tinsley for drinks, and says she wants Tinsley to be happy. In Ramona’s interview, she says she felt badly ignoring Tinsley at the restaurant. She suggested they meet for drinks at T Bar, and toast to her being back with Scott. Tinsley says, a lot happened really fast. She’s loved Scott for a long time, and they’ve been on this road before. LuAnn joins them, and in her interview, Tinsley says, it means a lot that Ramona and LuAnn reached out to her after their mean girls episode. If they want to talk about her happiness, she’s more than willing. Ramona’s friend Ron shows up, and in Tinsley’s interview, she says, typical Ramona, but at least she cares this much. Ramona says she’s happy for Tinsley, but it happened fast. Now she’s leaving New York. LuAnn asks if Tinsley is coming to her Halloween party, but Tinsley thinks she’ll be in Chicago; she’s moving tomorrow. In her interview, LuAnn says, it feels like it’s moving fast. She’s happy for Tinsley, but wishes she’d stay for a few days. The Halloween party she’s planning is over the top, and they could include celebrating Tinsley and Scott. Ha-ha-ha! Like that would happen. Nice of LuAnn to make it about her. Tinsley says Scott is building her a closet, and also a glam room, and Ramona says, that’s commitment. They clink glasses, and in Ramona’s interview, she says, when a man builds you a closet, that says a lot. She knows a woman who’s been dating a guy for seven years, and she still doesn’t have closet space in his house. This is real now. She hugs Tinsley, and LuAnn says she couldn’t be happier. They all want the best for Tinsley, and will miss her. They have a three-way hug, and LuAnn says they’ll want to see the ring. They toast, and Ramona says, to Tinsley’s happiness. May all your wishes and rainbows come true.

Tinsley packs, and Dale helps. She tells Dale that some things are going to Palm Beach, some to Newport storage, and some are going to Chicago. Dale looks at Tinsley’s baby cup, and starts to cry. She says Tinsley has always been on the east coast, and Tinsley says, it’s happy. She loves Chicago, and she loves Scott. Dale says, everything is changing. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, so much happened so fast. We flash back to her meeting Scott (and immediately making out with him), Scott bringing her a giant heart of flowers, break-ups, and make-ups. Tinsley says she knows if she doesn’t take this moment, she’ll regret it for the rest of her life. She’s going to listen to herself and what she wants, and nobody else. Leah come by, and says, oh my God, when she sees the dogs in tiny ruffled dresses. She opens some champagne. In Leah’s interview, she says, as sad as she is, she’s happy for Tinsley. She thought Tinsley was crazy for wanting to be the fairytale, and not the legend, but now she wishes she had ten percent of Tinsley’s optimism and belief in love. Sonja arrives, and Dale says, her favorite girl in the world. She hugs Sonja, who almost knocks over a lamp. In her interview, Sonja says she’s had her doubts in the past, but Tinsley is happy, and she only wants the best for her. Get ready, Chi-town. The Tins is on her way. Dale says Sonja took in her girl. She didn’t want Tinsley being by herself when she moved back to NYC, and Sonja said come and stay. We flash back to Tinsley living with Sonja, and Dale says she’s thankful. Sonja is generous and kind, and Dale loves her. Sonja says she loves Dale too. She only wanted Tinsley to be safe, get her own dog, and develop her brand again. Now she’s doing her charities and been in fashion shows, and a man has been thrown in the mix. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she’s glad for the pat on the back. Sonja says she loves that Tinsley’s fairytale is coming true. Leah toasts to Tinsley. In her interview, Tinsley says she’s changed so much since moving back to New York. She thought moving there would trigger her back to the old Tinsley from when she lived there before. It took time, but she feels like herself again, and she’s confident. We flash back to Tinsley performing in the Big Apple Circus, Tinsley dancing on a table, and the fashion show. She says she doesn’t think it would have happened without all the bumps in the way. Thank you, mug shot; thank you, Sonja’s townhouse; thank you, everyone she’s met along the way. It’s been a great ride, and she’s happy where she is. We read that Tinsley got her dream ring when Scott romantically proposed in front of Christmas carolers – with Dale’s approval. She’s in the process of planning her closet.

Coming up this season, Ramona terrorizes Sonja with a lobster, a tropical vacation, Ramona plunges a toilet, LuAnn gets back on a camel, LuAnn and Dorinda have it out, Ramona tells Dorinda to look in the mirror, Sonja tells Ramona STFU, Sonja tells Leah that she cheapens the group of friends, and Ramona tells the cameraman, we’re done.

🍽 We’re down to four on Top Chef, and tonight, Padma said they had one last journey. They were going to Parma, home of Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese and Prosciutto di Parma ham. Tom – who should be on Jeopardy, he’s so full of facts – said that the town is protected by the Italian government, who make sure those products are legit and only come from Parma. Their tour guide was going to be Lorenzo Cogo, the youngest Michelin star chef in Italy. The challenge was to create two dishes – a primi and secondi course – featuring the two ingredients, and they would be serving them to sixteen of the most esteemed chefs in Italy.

The chefs went to the home of a billion cheese wheels, where we learned that with Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese, age is the most important factor, and only salt is added by immersion. The cheese is tapped with a hammer to see if it’s good. In her interview, Melissa said she grew up with that nasty grated parmesan cheese. Yep. You know the one. It tastes like childhood. Moving on to where prosciutto is born, we learned to never cook it. Lorenzo seemed like a super cool guy, and the grocery store was phenomenal, with an abundance of fresh produce. Stephanie said Parma was very meat forward, but she wanted her dish to be vegetable forward, so the judges would have nothing else to compare it to. Their last stop was a cured ham place that was like something out of Texas Chain Saw Massacre. Afterwards, the chefs reminisced about the season. In Melissa’s interview, she talked about mending her relationship with her father, and said she thought it affected her cooking; her confidence is better. He’d finally said he was proud of her. They stayed overnight at a farm, where Stephanie said she never felt more happy, and when you’re happy, your food tastes better. She was ready to crush it.

Raft: a combination of ingredients that are added to clarify broth by trapping the impurities and then rising to the surface in a floating mass (from RecipeTips.com). I looked this up because Melissa said she broke her raft, and would have to go through the process again. At first, I thought she was talking about a piece of kitchen equipment, but then when I read that, it made sense. She said it was a total rookie move, and she didn’t have time for that.

Padma told introduced guest judge, author and chef Evan Funke. Apparently, he has a huge hand in how pasta is made in the US. Evan thought the challenge was incredibly difficult, because both ingredients have strong flavors and are salty. Tom said he thought the chefs all did well, and Padma told them that Melissa and Stephanie stood out. Stephanie seemed totally shocked, and said earning her place there was humbling and a proud moment. Evan said they were all extraordinary chefs, but the shining star was Melissa. Padma pointed out it was Melissa’s third win in a row. In her interview, Melissa said she couldn’t explain what it felt like, but she had one more big challenge to conquer. Kevin and Bryan looked pretty sad.

Evan said Bryan’s pasta was cooked the best, but he screwed up with the cheese (my words – Evan was much more eloquent). Padma said there was no heart soul in the dish, which seemed to offend Bryan, who said he tried to push the envelope and try something new. Gail said Kevin was too heavy-handed with the cheese, it was agreed the pork in his pork and apple dish was too tough. (During the tasting, one chef had said the pork didn’t welcome you.) Kevin said it was the most soulful of all the food he’d made, and that’s all he cared about at this point in his life. Gail said both of them didn’t execute the challenge when it came to the ingredients.

Tom said he had a lot of empathy for them. Coming back showed what they were made of – as chefs, but more important, as people. Kevin had to pack his knives, which sounded like it was painful for Padma to say. In his interview, said he’d learned to be a fighter, and fight for what he wanted in life. He told Bryan to have a good time, and everyone applauded as he bid farewell. In his exit interview, he said he’d had a lot of hard times, but fought back and won. He wanted people who were struggling to have hope that there were great things on the other side. Bravo, Kevin!

Next time – the finale – the chefs are challenged to make the best four-course meal of their lives, get help from former contestants, and the judges take a turn at cooking.

👨🏽‍🍳 The Young One…

Read more about Chef Lorenzo. He’s quite impressive.


🍜 Bring In Da Funke…

Learn what rules Evan goes by.


💃🏽 Beyond the Franchise…

What happens when a Housewife is put out to pasture.


🧙🏽 An Unconventional Convention…

At least you don’t have to stand in line for autographs.


🚶🏽‍♀️ Limping Along…

It’s been another one of them there long weeks. My dog Trinket (somewhat misnamed, since she’s kind of tank shaped) came through surgery fine, but is still out of it. I’ll have what she’s having. I don’t think she’s thrilled with the fashionable leopard neck pillow she now has to wear either. I got 99 problems, and at least that one is crossed off the list. Go forth and stay safe, stay moving forward, and stay curiouser and curiouser.

June 4, 2020 – Memorial Preempt, GH Gets Involved, Jake’s History, Newport Cougars, Chefs In Tuscany, BH Special, Heather’s Wise Words, Secret Wives, a Dad’s Review & Roar


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Today’s GH flashback would have been from May 25th, 2017, a continuation of the 2017 Nurse’s Ball. However, GH was preempted for the George Floyd’s Memorial Service, which even I have to admit, is important for everyone to see. You can easily find it on YouTube, but here are some highlights:


🙌🏽 Soap Rep…

How some GH cast members got involved.


🚴🏾‍♂️ Catching You Up…

If you missed it, or like me, just plain forgot, find out how Jake got involved with Helena in the first place.


The Real Housewives of New York City

Leah asks if anyone is freaking out over her behavior, and LuAnn says they didn’t like the Tasmanian Devil. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, they’re not perfect. They all do crazy things, but this is a new crazy. They need to get used to it. Elyse says she wasn’t freaking out, but to be honest, she’s never seen someone so off the rails. Leah says she needed to get it out. She’s been with her kid, holding it together. Tinsley hugs Leah, who adds, it was totally cathartic. In Leah’s interview, she says she’s not in the best place mentally. She had a huge falling out with the guy she was dating. She drank to forget, and drank too much. Elyse says she’s never been with a woman, but if she did, it would be Leah. We flash back to Elyse saying she wanted to sleep with Ramona, after Ramona bragged about a three-condom night. Elyse says after seeing Leah so crazy, she wants that experience in bed. Sarah arrives, and Leah introduces her around. In Ramona’s interview, she says she’s glad Leah’s sister is there to keep her company. They’ll see how it goes. Sarah says it’s her first 24-hours away from the baby. Sarah misses her, but she doesn’t have to wake up suddenly, and do something for someone. Dorinda says she and Leah look like each other (they do), and asks where Sarah lives. Sarah says, Williamsburg, Brooklyn, and Dorinda tells her about seeing a special about Williamsburg, and how they have the best macaroons. She was ready to pack her bags and go there.

They go back to where they’re staying, and Tinsley, Leah, and Sarah take a selfie on the terrace. The women get ready for dinner. Sonja tells Ramona that she’s not doing her hair and makeup; she’s just changing her clothes and underwear. Dorinda goes to LuAnn’s room, and says she started without them. In LuAnn’s interview, she says she loves Dorinda, but when she says she’s been drinking all day, and they’re going out to dinner, it’s all kinds of red flags. Dorinda says she talked to John, and LuAnn asks if she’s okay. Dorinda tears up, and LuAnn says, talk to her. Dorinda says she just wants to be left alone for a little while, and LuAnn says just tell John that she needs time. He’ll  understand. She feels like Dorinda is feeling bad for John, and that’s not the way to make a decision. Dorinda says she doesn’t want to be a downer, but she’s sad. LuAnn says, of course; they were together a long time. In Dorinda’s interview, she says when she’s not talking to John, she can get through it, but when she talks to him, she realizes they’ve broken up, and he’s not part of her life anymore. She’s sad and emotional. She’s alone again. LuAnn says, let him go, and see what happens. Dorinda says, let the birdcage free, which doesn’t seem quite right, but okay. LuAnn tells her not to worry. She always lands on her feet. In LuAnn’s interview, she says she’s been there, and it’s not easy. Dorinda and John have been together a long time. If you don’t deal with your emotions, it creates negative energy. Dorinda thinks she’s not in a good place, and they drink some wine. LuAnn says now they have to go out with these crazy chicks.

The women meet at restaurant. I wonder what the hell Sonja is wearing; sparkly silver leggings with sneakers or some kind of flats. It’s not a good look. For anyone. Ramona, Sonja, and LuAnn immediately gravitate to the bar, even though their table is ready. In Tinsley’s interview, when the table isn’t ready, you go to the bar, but if it’s ready, you sit at the table. Ramona flirts with some guys, while Elyse sits alone, waiting. In her interview, Tinsley says Ramona is always getting up to talk to men to show she can get attention. She acts like she’s a goddess, but she’s not. She blows off one on one personal time with friends just to prove she’s still got it. It’s not right. In Elyse’s interview, she says, hi, I’m Ramona. Can I feel your muscles? Ramona finds out that the guy she’s been chatting up is engaged, and in Tinsley’s interview, she says, he’s spoken for. Can we now get to the table? She sits, and says, she’s embarrassed. Ramona, Sonja, and LuAnn are still at the bar, when waiter Sean comes by, and Dorinda tells him to come back. In Ramona’s interview, she says, Leah is out of sight, out of mind. The seat at the bar is better than the seat at the table. Tinsley says, they’re cougaring out, and it’s rude. Leah suggests she tell them that their behavior is embarrassing. In her interview, she says she loves Tinsley, but doesn’t think her delivery and communication skills with these women is productive. They need to be communicated with in a special way. She says this like she’s been a real winner in that department. Tinsley goes to the bar, and tells Sonja there’s a nice spot at the table, but Sonja ignores her and talks to another guy. Tinsley tries to get the women to sit, and engaged guy looks annoyed, although I’m not sure who he’s annoyed with, Tinsley, the others, or both. In Sonja’s interview, she says she can’t believe Tinsley is trying to drag them back to the table. She thinks checking the hot guys out is a great alternative. I might think so too, if there were any hot guys there. Tinsley tells the engaged guy to quit talking to them, then decides she’d rather have dinner without them. Sonja and LuAnn eat something Lady and the Tramp spaghetti style. Bleh. Tinsley tells Ramona that she’s rude; Ramona isn’t even looking at her. She asks them to please come to the table. LuAnn goes to the table, and tells Dorinda that Ramona isn’t a good wingwoman. Tinsley sits down, and says they’re rude; they look like cougars. Dorinda babbles to Elyse, and in Leah’s interview, she says she’s thinking the guy will take one look at her and her sister and forget the others. She and Sarah go to the bar, and she tells the guy that they’re trying to get their friends over to the table. He says they’re talking, and Sarah says she doesn’t think his fiancé would like it. Not-so-hot guy says the situation is their effing problem, and walks away. In her interview, Leah says, this is the prize. That tells her everything she needs to know, but mission accomplished. He’s gone. In Ramona’s interview, she says the last thing Tinsley should do is take her away from the man she’s talking to. Man, is this woman some kind of insecure.

Dorinda babbles about having a Black Card to Elyse. In Elyse’s interview, she says Dorinda is over-the-top drunk. Tinsley is escalating, and the ones at the bar are a geriatric version of Girls Gone Wild. Ramona and Sonja join them, and LuAnn suggests bringing it down a notch. Tinsley tells Ramona that if she’d set up the dinner, she’d want them to be respectful. Dorinda wonders what’s going on, and LuAnn says they need to find kindness. Sonja starts yelling, and in Leah’s interview, she says she’s flabbergasted. She knows she was acting like a maniac yesterday, but at least she’s a fun maniac. LuAnn thinks it’s nasty, and Ramona says talk to Leah’s sister, who’s guilty by association. Dorinda gets up, and Leah says Ramona should take a note from her sister, and learn how to behave. Dorinda says she’s going home, and in her interview, she says she should have stayed home. She had Ghost Hunters geared up, and room service, and was going to sleep at 6:30. Sonja burps, Ramona acts like she’s being choked by the decorative flint corn on the table, and Sonja trumps that with using some squash from the same centerpiece to block her ears. LuAnn asks if anybody would like a shrimp, and Leah says she can’t. Ramona and Sonja trash Leah’s sister; Ramona calling her a demon, and Sonja saying she’s a weirdo. LuAnn says she’s made an executive decision; they’re going back to the hotel. In Leah’s interview, she says, go ahead and f*** with her, but not with her family. She sits across from Ramona, throws a ravioli at Ramona’s face, and leaves. In Elyse’s interview, she says Ramona didn’t even flinch. She tells Ramona that it’s all over her face. Outside, Leah tells Tinsley what she did, and Tinsley says, sometimes you just have to throw a ravioli. Truth! Ramona says she doesn’t need people like this in her life. They’re not invited to her birthday party. In Ramona’s interview, she says she’s disappointed in Leah. Disappointment is worse than anger because… it just is. LuAnn comes back in, and says this was upsetting. Tinsley, Sarah, and Leah head back, and Leah says she’s done. She’s over it. LuAnn sets the stalk end of the corn on fire, for the energy. In her interview, Leah says she feels bad, but not bad enough to change who she is. She kisses Tinsley, and they both fall on the ground.

What’s sad is, I’m wondering if I’ll end up hating this show as much as Beverly Hills just because of Ramona. NYC was always my jam, but she’s become an embarrassing snake, who will toss aside her friends for any man or friends higher on the social ladder. She’s always been an embarrassment of some sort, and occasionally the voice of reason, but she’s so worried about dying alone, she’s become the worst kind of friend ever. Some of the others, like Leah, exhibit bad behavior, but Ramona is beyond self-centered.

Dorinda goes to LuAnn’s room, and LuAnn asks if she had breakfast. Dorinda says she had a hamburger from room service; she likes lunch for breakfast. Sarah tells Leah that she’s annoyed. She came so far to have a relaxing 24-hours, but it’s not relaxing; it’s upsetting. Leah says the women treating Sarah like that because of her. It’s not okay, and she feels bad that she invited Sarah and this sh*t happened. In Leah’s interview, she says she doesn’t feel happy. She’s not proud losing her temper to the point where she threw food. She’s also feeling bad that her sister had a sh*tty time. She’s not sure how to move forward with this group, and doesn’t even know if that can happen.

Dorinda tells LuAnn that she likes Leah. She thinks Leah is young and lost. LuAnn says, it’s sad, but it’s one thing to upset someone, and another to be all out aggressive. She threw ravioli at Ramona. (It’s not about the pasta.) Dorinda wishes she’d stayed for that one. LuAnn says, when you push that far, it’s hard to go back. In Ramona’s interview, she says it’s not that Leah can’t be who she is, but if that’s who she is, it’s unacceptable. She needs to act nutty around her other girlfriends. Elyse says, not that it’s justified, but she’s known Ramona a long time, and when they’re in a group, even she finds it hard to break in sometimes. Leah takes things to heart, like what Sonja said about people with tattoos being dirty and diseased. Sonja says Leah is a loose cannon (which is rich, coming from the biggest cannon there). She was arrested, and thrown out of school. Sonja adds that she’s trying to be sensitive.

Sarah tells Leah, all of these women have had a night where they threw ravioli in someone’s face. They’re passive, and it’s hard to get an apology from someone who’s passive/aggressive. They’ll just say they didn’t mean it. Leah says her problem isn’t being passive/aggressive; she’s just in your face. It makes her crazy when she’s told to act in a different way. Sarah says Leah doesn’t understand the game of dealing with people. LuAnn asks Dorinda how they’re going to fix this. Dorinda says they can’t, and LuAnn says, no, the girls have to fix it, but how can they help facilitate it? They can’t let this continue; it’s a nightmare. She thinks, if it can swing that far to the right, it can swing back that far to the left. Elyse asks Ramona and Sonja how can they move forward from this. She promises if they give Leah a chance… Sonja says they don’t know when she’s going to go off; she’s like a timebomb. Ramona says there’s a certain demeanor and caliber; a way of acting with the group. Would that be selfishly? Egotistically? She’s not being specific. In Ramona’s interview, she says, it puts a damper in their dynamic. If Leah can’t act properly, no way Jose. Sarah tells Leah, it’s a pit in the ocean. Dorinda tells LuAnn, they’ll hope for the best, and prepare for the worst.

Back in the city, LuAnn meets with cabaret producer Ben for lunch. He thinks it would be a good idea for her to open with Life is a Cabaret, by which I assume he means Cabaret. He tells her that she put cabaret on the map, and made it popular. I nearly choke on my coffee. Ben is a real ass kisser, and the Countess is just lapping it up. In her interview, LuAnn says, it’s an all new Lu. She wants to do an expansion on Marry-Eff-Kill. Who doesn’t love sex, and who doesn’t want to see her being naughty? Ben says she should include the audience, build on the theme, but include traditional songs. Barbara Streisand always has to sing People. I have no words. LuAnn says they need to include Sonja. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, Sonja loves to be on stage, and was in her original shows. We flash back to when Sonja had a wardrobe malfunction, and her dress pretty much came off of her. LuAnn says Sonja needs to get on stage with her – now. She suggests Sonja sing Jovani with her. Ben wonders if they could get a breakaway outfit for Sonja, and LuAnn says, Sonja loves to lose her skirt. They could reveal one fabulous dress after another.

Leah’s meets her parents, Bryan and Bunny, for lunch. These two could pass for Billy Crystal and Carol Kane in The Princess Bride, albeit better looking. I kid you not. In Leah’s interview, she says things are not resolved with her mother since she’s been trying moderate drinking. Wow. If that’s moderate, I’d hate to see her on a real bender. She wants to get to the point where her mom accepts things, and wants Leah to be happy with the decisions she makes, but she’ll never get that. Bryan orders an old fashioned, and tells Leah that he needs to stay away from anything acidic. The lining between his esophagus and stomach is wearing out. In her interview, Leah says she has the qualities of both of her parents, but she’s more her father’s daughter. Leah asks if Sarah said anything about Newport, and Bully says Leah spills her guts, but Sarah is quieter. Leah says she thought she could blow off some steam with the women. She didn’t do anything different from them – they’re not the ladies who lunch; they’re wild – but then they turned it around, saying they were scared of her. Bunny asks if she got nasty, and Leah says not until the next day, when she was pushed. Bunny thinks alcohol is a slippery slope. In her interview, Leah says she can agree, but she thinks when her mom hears about her drinking, it’s a trigger. It’s like she has PTSD from Leah’s early years. Leah tells Bunny, she likes an escape once in a while, but Bunny says if she has the addiction genes, it’s a slippery slope. Bryan makes a joke about genes/jeans, and Bunny says Leah shouldn’t trade her health and sobriety for stupid reasons.

In the swank space on the rooftop of Dorinda’s building, she wonders where her co-host LuAnn is. We see a clip of LuAnn asking what they’re going to do about the situation. Dorinda suggests a tea party where they can relax and relate, and says the rooftop of her building is perfect. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she came out of the Newport weekend feeling exhausted. They’re gathering, but not connecting. They can have tea, but no alcohol will be involved, which is always a good thing with this group. Dorinda tells Leah to think before she speaks, and Leah says she’ll feel it out. In Leah’s interview, she says she knows if she doesn’t take the high road, there will be no reconciliation, and she was wrong to throw ravioli at Ramona. Everyone is dressed up, with hats or fascinators. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, she doesn’t know what co-host means to LuAnn. Dorinda seats everyone, and in Ramona’s interview, she says, it’s ironic that Dorinda and LuAnn are throwing a tea party with crumpets and scones. Maybe they’re trying to teach Leah a few things. Maybe someone should teach Ramona the meaning of the word ironic. Sonja and Tinsley are (no surprise) late, and LuAnn asks if they should start without them. Ramona says, if you have three or more, it’s allowed. I immediately make a mental note of this, just in case I need to know. Leah says she owes Ramona an apology. She didn’t want it to get to that point. Ramona says Leah disrupted the weekend, but she’s sorry, so it’s okay. She walked away from the weekend emotionally upset, but if Leah is willing, they can put it behind them and reset. Leah says she’s not apologizing for who she is, but for what she did. Ramona says if that’s Leah’s normal behavior, it scares her. Leah asks if Ramona has ever seen her act like that before, and LuAnn says, at Ramona’s house in the Hamptons. Leah says she won’t turn up any more. Ramona says she was exhausted, and Dorinda tells her, don’t get carried away. They’ve all had moments. We flash back to Dorinda in loud drunk mode, Sonja falling on the floor after saying she’d knock Bethenny out, LuAnn in custody, and Ramona throwing a glass at Kristen’s face. I met Kristen once. She was a very nice person, which explains why she’s no longer on the show. Ramona and Leah hug, and Leah says she feels bad, and Ramona says she’s a good girl. They’ve had some great moments, and they can have more. In Ramona’s interview, she says the apology isn’t what she wanted, but has a soft spot for Leah. She doesn’t know why. They both get weepy, and Leah says she’s a cry baby. Dorinda says Ramona is a big softie. In her interview, Leah says she doesn’t know why she’s so emotional. She’s projecting her mommy issues onto this relationship. It’s really weird. Ramona says they’ll get through this; it will be okay. Sonja comes in, with Tinsley not far behind. Dorinda wishes they had clotted cream, and Ramona says they don’t need potted cream. Leah says Tinsley literally looks like Barbie. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, going to a tea party, dressed up, in puffy sleeves. It’s the most exciting thing ever. She loves it. Dorinda has everyone change seats, and Ramona hugs Leah again. She says Leah touches a special place in her. I sit on any and all jokes. Dorinda says she wants to talk to Tinsley privately.

Dorinda tells Tinsley that she doesn’t want to be aggressive in her approach. She knows for a fact that Tinsley was in Niagara Falls with Scott, and Tinsley needs to tell them that she’s seeing him. I just don’t get why this is such a huge issue for Dorinda, especially since no one else seems to care. Tinsley says she’s not seeing him. She ran into him in Toronto, and they flew to Niagara Falls. It was a two day thing. Dorinda says she doesn’t care; it’s deceptive. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she knows someone who knows someone who sent her a picture, and said Tinsley and Scott were spending the weekend together. Why is Tinsley lying about it? Tinsley asks if Dorinda wants every detail of her life, and Dorinda says she’s not after details, but Tinsley claims they’re not together. Tinsley says, they’re not, but she’s hopeful it will turn into something. Dorinda says Tinsley needs to tell them. She tells Tinsley, she’ll leave it to her, and goes back to the table. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she’s a person, and has a life. She doesn’t share every detail; neither does Dorinda. Don’t put her on blast for not being open. She’s very open and honest. She doesn’t think she needs to say it.

Tinsley goes back to the table, and says she didn’t think she needed to tell anybody if she happened to see her ex on the weekend. Ramona asks if she’s back with Scott. It’s a huge move, and Tinsley needs to share it. Elyse says she understands why Tinsley didn’t want to say anything. She doesn’t need their comments. In Ramona’s interview, she says, she understands it’s Tinsley’s private business. She saw Scott for the first time in a long time, and she didn’t want to share it. She doesn’t want to hear their opinions, especially Dorinda. Dorinda acts like she’s a detective, finding out things about Tinsley. Is she really so concerned about what Tinsley does? LuAnn asks if they can know how it went, and Tinsley says, it went well. Dorinda asks why she’s crying then, and Tinsley says she thinks it won’t end up well. Like always. In her interview, Tinsley says she and Scott always break up, but you need to do what you need to do to get what you want. And she wants to be with Scott. She tells the women that she loves him. She tried being away from him, but she can’t. Leah says, just be with him, and Sonja – who wakes up for a second – agrees. LuAnn says Tinsley needs to call the shots, and Leah says, tell him, put a ring on it, impregnate me right TF now, or it’s a wrap. Ramona says Dorinda and LuAnn know how to throw a tea party.

Next time, Ramona whines about her birthday, Dale tells Tinsley that everything is changing, a Haunted House, Dorinda finds the man of her dreams, and Leah makes a toast.

🍜 Top Chef began with Tom talking about Italy, and how Covid-19 had affected things since they’d been there. He sent his good wishes, and hoped things would be back to normal soon, and they could return.

The Quickfire challenge had the chefs making an aperitivo for 30 locals from the town of Lucca; something that paired with Peroni beer. The station they picked would determine the region their ingredients came from, and the winner would receive $10K courtesy of Peroni.

The chefs flew business class to Italy, and it looked beyond fabulous. I would love to be able to fly first class before I die. It just looks like the epitome of luxury. Business class would be okay too. In his interview, Kevin said learned to fight every day like it’s his last, and he was ready. Bryan said he’d studied the Russian language, which was not going to help him here. Padma introduced guest chef Filippo Saporito, who tasted the dishes along with the locals. He told Padma that Melissa’s mussel offering opened your heart and your stomach, which I assume is fairly high praise. Melissa was close, but Kevin won with his polenta.

For the elimination challenge, the chefs would be hunting white truffles for use in a dish for a Tuscan food festival. In Stephanie’s interview, she said it was a chef’s dream to go truffle hunting in Tuscany. They would be guided by employees of the Savini family, who are apparently top-of-the-line procurers of truffles. The only requirement of the dish was that it showcase the truffle. The chefs would have three hours to prep and cook, and be serving 100 diners, including million Michelin star chef Cristiano Tomei. The chefs got together with two guys and two dogs, and the hunt was on. They were surprised to find tons of truffles, and it reminded me of the day it seemed like a truckload of beach glass was dumped on our nearby beach. One of food’s most precious treasures, the white truffle goes for nearly $3K per pound, so I won’t be cooking with that any time soon. The chefs had 45 minutes and 400 euros to shop in Italy’s version of Whole Foods. Gregory was having back problems, and it was seriously interfering with his concentration. I felt badly for him, and totally identified.

Stephanie, whose first anniversary fell on the day of the challenge, was surprised to find Italian radicchio had a stronger flavor than that in the U.S., and thought it was too much for her dish. Rather than take it off the menu, which she’d already established, she did her best to tone it down. When it came time for the judging, Tom said, for the most part, the dishes were good, but not every dish was good with truffles. Melissa had wanted to do some Asian/Italian fusion, and her congee was a unanimous hit. Gail said she might start a congee revolution, and Chef Tomei said she had the courage to do the necessary thing. Whatever that meant. She was the winner, with her dish being declared intelligent, fresh, and harmonious. Bryan was in as well, Gail saying his veal and potato dish was a beautiful way to use a truffle. It was simple and let the truffle do its job.

On the downside, Gregory’s wild boar hid the truffle flavor. Tom said Gregory made a great stew, but it wasn’t good for truffles. Chef Tomei said black truffles would have made a difference, but the white truffles had too delicate a flavor. Kevin also had too much going on with his meatball effort, and the truffles were overwhelmed. Padma said it was courageous of Stephanie to make pasta, but the radicchio obliterated the taste of the truffle filling. Stephanie admitted she had been afraid to take it off the menu when she’d already chosen to include it. Padma said they might have thought the radicchio should have been included, but would have respected her decision.

In the end, Padma said they bottom three had good dishes, but didn’t use the truffle properly, and Gail said they all essentially made the same mistake. Tom said that chefs understand traditions so they can break them, but one dish went to far. Gregory had to pack his knives and go. In his exit interview, he said he’d really wanted to win, but the life lesson he learned was that he can’t always control what happens. It was the wrong dish to serve with truffles. He gave the competition 110%, and had a few regrets, but knew he’d done everything physically and mentally that he could. It was a great start for his next chapter.

Next time, the chefs go to Parma, the home of Parmesan cheese. The chefs will be making their own interpretation of traditional dishes for sixteen Michelin star chefs.

⏰ On Wednesday, June 10th, at 9 pm, Bravo will be airing a special episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills where Garcelle and Dorit will be giving commentary on one of the recent episodes. While I might have picked someone other than Dorit, count me in. The only thing better than watching TV, is watching other people watch TV.

🐱 Lord Tubbington’s Mom Speaks Out…

Fondue For Two was my favorite thing on Glee, and it sounds like Heather Morris has the same good heart that her character did.


👠 Real Housewives Of What…?

Apparently, like the cat of the same name, they’re invisible.


👩🏾‍🍳 Sweet Review…

We could all use some positive news, and it doesn’t get much better than this.


🪂 Sliding Into the Weekend Like…

You made it to another Friday, which hopefully is gaining more meaning again. See you for tea and words of wisdom tomorrow. Until then, stay safe, stay current, and stay open to learning something new, while respecting the old.

May 28, 2020 – Nurse’s Ball 2015, Look Out Newport, New Interpretations, a Hiatus, a Break-Up, Gordon Speaks & Keep Going


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

Today’s GH Nurse’s Ball flashback was from May 1st, 2015. Britt and Brad watched the red carpet from home while eating ice cream out of the container. Patrick was with Sam, Hayden showed up with Drew (at the time, Jake Doe), and Michael was with Sabrina. Duke was back from the dead, and Anna showed up with who-the-hell-is-that-guy? Felix arrived with Lucas, but told the interviewer that it wasn’t a love match; he was still single and Lucas was very much in love with someone else. Spinelli accompanied Maxie, and Nathan came with adorkable Ellie. Spinelli accidently tripped Maxie, causing a near nip slip, which Brad and Britt put on heavy replay. Old Nikolas, old Jordan with Shawn, and Dante were there, Nikolas bringing Valerie.

Burned in a fire accidentally started by Cameron, Spencer also spent the night at home, wearing a Phantom mask. Seeing Emma with Cameron on the red carpet, Spencer said, what the fudge? but Britt showed up like a fairy godmother to take him to the Ball to claim his ladylove. Carly had a plan to get Ric run out of town, but told Ric she wanted to put their differences aside, wishing him all the happiness he deserved. This time Aveeno got the plugs, and Obrecht crashed the end of the opening number with 99 Luftballons. After Carly outed Ric and Elizabeth for lying to Jake Doe about who he really was, Brad bailed out the ball with, I Want to Marry You, and a proposal to Lucas. Ending the episode, Elizabeth finally told Jake Doe that he was really Jason. Which he ended up not being, but we didn’t know that then.

The Real Housewives of New York City

We ended last week with a three-way hug between Ramona, Dorinda, and Sonja. We’ll see how long that lasts.

Everyone packs for Newport, Rhode Island. Sonja packs her hormones, telling assistant Matthew that they keep her nice and friendly. In Ramona’s interview, she says, Newport is a chichi place with a lot of atmosphere; like South Hampton, but tinier. Dorinda supervises the work on Bluestone Manor, as they’ve starting doing external stuff like painting.

The women – minus Dorinda who’s going separately – meet at the limo, and LuAnn calls Tinsley a child for bringing her own pillow. I think a lot of people bring their own pillows on trips. In Tinsley’s interview, she says the Newport she knows is Palm Beach as well. Whatever that means. Her mom has a place there, and the people from Palm Beach go to Newport in the summer. Leah tells Ramona that she looks twenty-five, and LuAnn tells her, compliments will get her everywhere. Ramona says they’ll have lunch when they get there, and tonight she’s having a lobster clambake. Wouldn’t that be a lobsterbake? She says, Dorinda has been edgy, and LuAnn says it was the anniversary of Richard’s death, and then it was his birthday. She’s been bitchy to everyone. Ramona says they have to show they care for her. She’s probably there already.

Yes she is. Dorinda checks into the Castle Hill Inn, telling the woman at the desk, she used to stay there with her late husband. In the limo, Leah whines, are we there yet? but it’s another two hours. Elyse says she had a humbling moment. She was passing some construction workers, who started yelling that she was beautiful. She turned around, and realized they weren’t talking to her. There was a six-foot tall blond walking behind her. Leah talks about Pita Guy, and says they had their first intimate moment. There was heavy petting, clothed, and the next day he didn’t even text. She told him she didn’t appreciate his aloof and irreverent attitude toward her time. In her interview, she says, even after seven years of therapy, and trying to hide it, the psycho bitch came out, and he saw it. She tells the women that her sister is a new mom with a seven-month old baby, and she’d like to invite Sarah along. Ramona is like, no, and Leah suggests she relax and think about it. In Ramona’s interview, she says she knows who works off who, and it’s a tenuous rope. Bringing a new personality into an already turbulent group might be a mistake.

They reach the inn, receiving welcome drinks at the desk. Dorinda is waiting for them in what looks like an empty restaurant, and they all go out onto the terrace. The waitstaff brings out trays of food, and Ramona asks for two dozen oysters. In her interview, Tinsley says she doesn’t like fighting. She’ll be happy to get a hello, but Dorinda seems approachable. Leah insists she’s not hungry, and I’m guessing she’s in what I call drinking mode, where the last thing you want is people shoving food at you. In Leah’s interview, she says she doesn’t feel good about herself, but here we go. She says she thinks Ramona would love her sister, and Ramona agrees to including Sarah in their dinner tomorrow. Ramona tells Sonja that she doesn’t want Sarah to come, but Leah talked her into it. Ramona decides they should take a vote, but Leah tells her, she already said yes. Plus, Ramona invited Elyse. Elyse says, don’t even talk to her, and in her interview, says she’s known the women for twenty years. Sonja says, guests can’t invite guests, reminding me of Jessie from NYC Prep giving one of the best quotes ever – guests of guests don’t bring guests. Leah says she’d already asked. In Sonja’s interview, she says the trip was meant for their clique of girls, and it should have been discussed among them. Ramona says she doesn’t want Sarah to come, and Leah says she’s being rude. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she thinks it’s important. Leah is in a new group, and she’s a single mom. Maybe she wants to hang around with her sister. Who cares? Leah tells Ramona, Dorinda and Tinsley said yes. What about LuAnn? LuAnn asks what do they care? and Leah says, it’s agreed. She appreciates it. Ramona says she looks forward to meeting Sarah.

They go to where they’ll be staying; cottage type rooms with terraces and gorgeous views. Dorinda tells the attendant unless he wants to be privy to something scary, she suggests he leave. He wisely takes her advice. Sonja says, the sea air feels good, and tells LuAnn, maybe they’ll get their mojo back. Leah calls Sarah, and tells her that she can come. Ramona tells Sonja, if she likes Sarah, she’ll be happy to have her.

Ramona wonders how Leah got her to say okay, and Sonja says she felt pressured. No one gets a plus-one. In Sonja’s interview, she says Ramona should have thought first. This is what she does; she says yes, then rescinds the invite. Ramona says she’s going to tell Leah tonight that her sister can’t come. In her interview, Ramona grumbles that Leah pressured her like a little girl. The dynamic won’t be good. Drinking like a fish already, Leah goes to Tinsley’s room. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she thinks she’s in for a fun time with Leah, but hopes Leah doesn’t get her naked like in the Hamptons. Leah tells Tinsley, in Newport, they don’t burp, or even pee. They head out to meet the other women for dinner.

In her interview, Tinsley says she hopes Leah doesn’t go off the deep end. Dorinda asks what Leah’s been doing while she was taking a nap all afternoon, and Leah says she started early. Ramona directs them to her clambake, down a path lit with white lights, to a table flanked with sheer drapes. Lagging behind, Leah tells Tinsley, it’s a judgement free zone, and Ramona passes out crowns, saying, they’re all princesses. LuAnn says that reminds her of Feeling Jovani, where she sings about a crown, and everyone is like, all right already. LuAnn tells Ramona, she doesn’t understand. She’d thought the more the merrier, but after reflection, Leah should have asked beforehand. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, when she thought about it, it was kind of rude asking at the last minute. Leah should have given more of a heads up. Ramona tells her, she should have said she’d love to meet Sarah another time. Tinsley and Leah finally catch up, and Tinsley screeches over the crown.

There’s a bar and a small outdoor seating area where the women have a cocktail before dinner. Dorinda and Leah want more vodka in theirs, and Ramona tries to stop Leah. In Leah’s interview, she says Ramona barely knows her, and wants to monitor her in a way she doesn’t monitor herself. Dorinda tells Ramona to leave Leah alone, and Leah says it’s her vacation; she’ll do what she wants. Leah asks the bartender for two shots, while Ramona frets, and mumbles something about Leah being a recovering alcoholic. Tinsley says Leah chose not to drink, and there’s a difference. Leah’s not a recovering alcoholic. Dorinda says they’re in a safe environment, like anywhere around this bunch is a safe environment. She tells Ramona, don’t be quick to judge. In Ramona’s interview, she says, Leah is overconsuming too quickly. What? Leah asks what Ramona is saying behind her back, and Tinsley says she told Ramona that Leah isn’t an alcoholic. Ramona says Leah stopped drinking for seven years. Leah says, it was nine, and while Ramona is her surrogate mother, and she respects that, Ramona doesn’t have to worry. In her interview, Leah says she’s feeling suffocated, and she’s worried if she’s not in Ramona’s good graces, Ramona will blow up.

They sit at a beautiful table, white everything, with white flowers down the middle. Tinsley and Sonja talk on the side. Ramona tells Sonja that she doesn’t want to say anything about Leah’s sister. In Sonja’s interview, she says she understands that Leah’s drinking makes her feel more confident. She’s an unconventional girl in a conventional town. But the strategy isn’t working. Leah sits on Sonja’s lap, and asks Tinsley if she’s going to get thrown out of Rhode Island. She’s having more fun than she’s had in an effing month and a half. In Ramona’s interview, she says she thought Sonja would have her back, but now Sonja is frolicking around, playing with Leah, and encouraging her to act this way. Ramona tells Leah to sit in her seat, and Leah says she’s rude. Leah finally sits, and says, sorry. She didn’t mean to make Ramona uncomfortable. In LuAnn’s interview, she says Leah wants to hang with the girls, but it’s been a while, and she can’t drink as much as she used to. Leah apologizes, calling Ramona mom. LuAnn says, stop freaking her out. While this is going on, Tinsley apologizes to Dorinda. Then Sonja chases Leah around the table. Ramona decides she’s going to tell Leah, because now is definitely the time. Dorinda tells Tinsley that she has so much to give. Dorinda is tough, so she was just trying to toughen Tinsley up.

This is the weirdest scene ever. While Dorinda and Tinsley talk quietly, chaos goes on next to the table. Sonja has now grabbed Leah, who falls to the ground, yelling that she doesn’t want to go on the Morgan yacht. Leah rolls around, and has lost one shoe somewhere. Sonja says Ramona has something to tell her, and Leah says she doesn’t want to go on the yacht. Ramona says she’d love to meet Leah’s sister, but at another time. Leah says, don’t go there, and Ramona says, she’s not coming. I swear, I’d just walk off this show. The paycheck can’t possibly be worth it. Dorinda tells Tinsley, maybe she was wrong. It’s Tinsley’s life, not hers. Ramona says they’ll have a cocktails and conversations party and invite Sarah, and Leah says Sarah is already on her way. Tinsley hugs Dorinda, who suggests they have a reset. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she feels like she’s in Groundhog Day, and she just wants to watch Leah destroy the place. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, bad timing on Ramona’s part. Leah is already bonkers. In Ramona’s interview, she says she didn’t expect a reaction like this. No one was murdered. Leah says she wants to talk to Ramona, but Ramona won’t talk. She says Leah is a little out of control, and Leah says, like no one in the group has been before. Elyse tries hug Leah, but Leah says, get off me. She walks over to the drapes, and pulls at them, and I fully expect the whole thing to come down, but it’s barely disturbed. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she was known as the gangster with blue eyes, but Leah is out of control.

Ramona takes Leah, who has moved on to the crying phase, away from the group. Ramona tells her to pretend like it’s yoga. Breathe in and out. LuAnn thinks Leah was rude to ask if she could invite her sister, and Sonja says Ramona was put on the spot. In Elyse’s interview, she says Leah is taking it personally instead of taking the opportunity to get to know the girls on a deeper level. Asking to bring her sister was a bad idea. Tinsley says, Leah can handle herself, but LuAnn says, clearly she can’t. Dorinda says, Leah’s not used to drinking, and LuAnn says, neither is she. Have they ever seen her behave that way? Yes. We have, and we do again, flashing back to LuAnn falling in that bush, and another clip of her just falling. In her interview, Leah says she’s done crazy in the past. She’s new to the group, and they’re not used to her kind of crazy. Ramona tells Leah that she doesn’t want to change the dynamic. Leah says she’s not staying if her sister isn’t allowed to come. Sonja says she can’t invite someone at the last minute, and Leah says, too late. Ramona can’t say yes, then no. Sonja says, they’ve got her. Sonja joins Tinsley and Dorinda in a hug, and Leah cries some more. LuAnn tells her, these bitches aren’t worth crying for. Sonja tells Ramona, it’s making her upset to see Leah upset. Let her bring her sister. They’re going to push her over the brink. Ramona tells Leah, her sister is welcome, and she’s sorry. In her interview, Ramona says Leah is new to the group, and loves her sister; maybe she’s being ridiculous. She apologizes to Leah again, and hugs her, telling her to stop crying. Ramona says she can be a control freak, but realized it mean a lot to Leah. She had to overlook her own feelings and change her mind.

In the morning, LuAnn does stretches on the terrace. Dorinda goes down to the beach, saying, waves, speak to me. She calls Leah, and asks how it’s going. Leah says she’s alive. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she knows how Leah woke up; the guilt, fear, and embarrassment. All those wonderful things that happen after a night of drinking and losing your sh*t. She’s been there. The Inn hasn’t been burned down; she’s good. Leah says she feels great, and Dorinda says Leah is her kind of girl. She asks if Leah got clarity, and Leah says she found her own clarity; her sister is coming. In her interview, Leah says she didn’t come on the trip in the best state of mind. She doesn’t remember what happened, but she feels like she released a lot of energy. Whatever happened was therapeutic. I like Leah, but it’s pretty selfish to intrude on everyone else’s time with your therapeutic insanity. She really shouldn’t drink. It’s not a good look for her.

Sonja tells Ramona, she feels great. Ramona marvels at Sonja being able to drink up a storm, and wake up fresh as a daisy. Elyse comes by, and says, they’re not dressed yet. Ramona says they like to lounge in the morning. Elyse asks how Ramona is feeling, and Ramona says she knows Leah was a little out of control. Elyse says Leah needed an exorcism. She thought Leah was wrong to ask her sister to come; however, once Ramona said yes, she shouldn’t have rescinded it. In her interview, Ramona says, she likes Leah, but Leah has two sides. The crazy side, and the regular side. She likes the regular side. Save the crazy side for your other young friends. She says, maybe Leah’s sister will be a good influence on her. She tells Elyse that they’re going shopping in town. They can work off what they ate.

The women reconvene, and Elyse asks how Leah is feeling. Leah says, good, and Elyse asks if she’s not hungover. Leah says she’s not, and Elyse says, that’s weird; she’s assuming Leah was wasted. Leah says, that’s the way she is, although alcohol fueled it. That’s how she wants to be all the time. Elyse says, and she wonders why guys think she’s a crazy chick. Ouch. In her interview, Dorinda says, who cares? No one should be judged by one night. Look at the whole group. Ramona asks how Leah is feeling, and Leah says, great. That’s actually a theory I have. Many alcoholics don’t seem to get hangovers. Ramona asks if Leah remembers what happened, and Leah says, of course she does. Bring it on. In Leah’s interview, she says, she doesn’t really want to be like that all the time, but she saw how the women were at the orchard – we flash back to the lunacy at lunch and in the corn maze – and the Hamptons. She thought she was allowed to chug ten martinis and lose her mind.

Leah, Dorinda, and Tinsley take one limo; while Ramona, Elyse, and LuAnn take another. Leah asks if they can believe what Elyse said, and Dorinda says, Elyse isn’t the one who should be giving out relationship advice. Ramona wonders why Dorinda is defending Leah, and Elyse says, Dorinda will give out advice, but everyone else better not. She does an impression of Dorinda calling Tinsley a superficial slut, and then yelling at Ramona not to judge Tinsley. I have to admit, it’s pretty spot-on.

Leah says Elyse was hard on her, but Elyse says she’s Leah’s biggest fan when Leah does normal. Leah says she’d never do that in front of her child, and Elyse asks what if she ends up with a mini me? What kind of message is she sending her daughter? Leah says she can do and say whatever she wants, and effity-eff-eff-effs her way out the door. Outside, she tells Dorinda that she and Elyse haven’t had enough interaction to make it appropriate for Elyse to be in her business. Elyse comes out, and Leah says, her daughter is twelve, and Elyse is asking how she’d feel if her daughter gets wasted? Don’t bring up her kid. Elyse promises not to go there, and Leah says, don’t talk about her daughter. Elyse says, that’s fair, and Dorinda asks why Elyse is in Leah’s business so much.

Dorinda says Elyse thinks she’s some great psychiatrist, prowling around, waiting for someone to make a mistake. In Sonja’s interview, she says she knows Elyse was just trying to be helpful. She suggests instead of breaking bread, they all break Bloody Marys. Dorinda toasts to being judgement free. Ramona says she won’t be embarrassed in Newport, and Dorinda asks what about the rest of the states? In Dorinda’s interview, she says, Leah is twenty years younger; give her a break. They should be guiding, not chastising her. Dorinda says, be inclusive, and Ramona says Dorinda is enabling Leah. Sonja thinks Leah should apologize, and Leah says she’s the first person to say she’s sorry, and take accountability. She got drunk, and enjoyed herself, but she’s sorry. Ramona says it was atrocious behavior, and upsetting to her. In her interview, Leah says, going into Newport, she was angry at herself, but instead of getting support, she got jerked around about her sister coming. Anything she does is wrong to these women. Leah says she thinks she triggered something in Ramona about her past, and it kills her. She tears up. Ramona says she’s blocked it out, and in LuAnn’s interview, she says, that’s a crock of sh*t. Ramona has been coming down hard on Leah, when Ramona is no angel. LuAnn tells Ramon that she’s making Leah feel bad for no reason. Ramona says they don’t know how she feels. In her interview, she says Dorinda and LuAnn grew up in loving homes, while hers was a war zone. She read books, and blanked out her dad and brother’s alcoholic rages. She tells Leah that her intention isn’t to make Leah feel bad. She really likes Leah, and doesn’t want to not like her. Leah says she is who she is, but Ramona says she doesn’t like that behavior. Maybe Leah can curb it; they’ll see. To be continued…

Next time, Dorinda wants to be left alone, Leah throws ravioli at Ramona, and Dorinda and Tinsley are back to arguing.

👩🏼‍🍳 On Top Chef, Karen unpacked her knives to go against Kevin in Last Chance Kitchen. Winner Kevin picked three chefs to go head to head with, and won against Brian full of Malarkey, the other white Bryan, and Gregory. This put Kevin back into the game. Award winning chef, and pioneer of California cuisine, Jonathan Waxman was the guest judge, and for the Quickfire challenge, the chefs were to create a two-course business class dish for an airline. They had to use ingredients found year round, and make the meal to airline tray specifications. Everyone made fabulous meals, but Brian full of Malarkey forgot you don’t get a steak knife on an airplane, making his entrée difficult to eat. Melissa was the winner, for which she’d get an advantage in the elimination challenge. I don’t know if these advantages are some kind of secret or I keep missing them somehow, but I have no clue what it was. Five chefs would be continuing on to the finale in Tuscany, courtesy American Airlines. For the final elimination challenge, they were to produce a dish inspired by Michael’s in Santa Monica, a restaurant owned by another California cuisine pioneer, Michael McCarty. Jonathan was his first chef, and the restaurant was celebrating its 40th anniversary. The chefs were to meet with Michael, and taste his signature dishes, which would serve as an inspiration. They would literally be serving Mike, Jonathan, and alumni from the restaurant.

Melissa was allowed first choice, and picked quail. For Kevin, it was duck; Stephanie, scallops with angel hair pasta; Bryan, lamb; Gregory, monkfish; and Brian full of Malarkey, veal. The idea was to take the dish, modernize it, and give it their own spin, yet keep an homage to the original. The highlight was when half of Brian full of Malarkey’s dishes went to another table, totally throwing him off his game. He stumbled through the long, stupid story that went with his creation, and was annoyed because he’d wanted the food to be eaten in a certain order. When everything had been tasted, Mike said they all took his dishes up to the next level, and Padma thanked them for glorious meal.

Melissa had her best night ever, winning immunity as well. Gail said there was nothing any of them would have changed, which was high praise. Mike told Stephanie that she was right there, and the race was close. Bryan and Kevin were also in, leaving Gregory and Brian full of Malarkey on the bottom. Malarkey said he’d had a great ride, and Padma asked if he was quitting. In his interview, Gregory said, Top Chef messes with you, and thought it was getting to Malarkey. He wanted to win because he deserved it, not because the other chef quit. Gail assured Malarkey that their judgement had nothing to do with the screw-up of his food going to another table. Malarkey said he was upset with the process, since his dishes hadn’t been eaten right. Everyone was like, what? and Gail said he can’t control the food once it leaves his hands. Tom told him that the duo on the plate didn’t talk to each other; there was a distinct clash. Which basically meant the two things he made didn’t go together. Jonathan said it didn’t evoke what Malarkey had babbled talked about. He told Gregory he’d been expecting more, and Padma said there wasn’t enough richness in Gregory’s risotto. I told you that risotto is always trouble.

Tom said, in the end, it comes down to what’s on the plate, and Brian full of Malarkey was told to pack his knives and go. Yay! In his interview, he said he didn’t want go out that way. He had every intention of winning, but his mind melted. He was still proud of what accomplished.

Next time, Italy, a truffle hunt, and making pasta for Italians

📺 Since Andy Cohen is on another one of his numerous vacations, Watch What Happens Live will return on Monday, June 8th. Although after suffering through much of the RHOA Reunion myself – three parts of it, no less – I can’t say he doesn’t deserve this break.

💃🏼 She’s Movin’ On…

Dorinda dishes on getting rid of the old John and chain.


🔥 Missed Hell…

While the 24 Hours to Hell and Back ship sailed without me, you can still watch Gordon discuss it, along with his life in quarantine.


🌥 Lifting the Fog…

We seem to be moving closer to a new yet old normalcy, and I’m moving closer to the end of what might possibly be the longest week of my life. See you tomorrow for tea and words of wisdom. Not from me. From other people. Until then, stay safe, stay out of fights (unless it’s the good fight), and stay mostly on the straight and narrow.

May 21, 2020 – Nina Makes a Decision, Dorinda In Denial, a Japanese Tradition & Nice


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

On the phone, Laura tells someone that it’s important to the city and her personally. She needs the details of Nelle’s lawsuit against the hospital. She sees Robert at the bar, and says if he doesn’t mind her saying it, it doesn’t look like he’s gotten much rest. Is he throwing himself into work? He says, it seems that way. The reports of Holly’s death have been greatly exaggerated. She asks if he has any new information, and he says his gut instinct tells him Holly is very much alive.

Maxie says the shots of Sasha are spectacular. She shouldn’t have doubted that Sasha would find a way to rally. Sasha is glad she’s happy, and Maxie says Sasha was a true wreck, but found a way to see the blue skies. Valentin comes in and looks at the photos. He’s pleased they have a signature look they can capitalize on. Maxie says Lucy led her to believe Valentin was going to be a silent partner, and he says he’s not going to make a habit of it. The launch is soon, and he wanted to see the literal face of the product. He’s leaving the beauty promotion in Maxie’s capable hands while he focuses on other ventures.

Ned talks to Tracy on the phone, and says, a third party is after Dylan’s shares… He’s trying to trace them. Apparently they’re searching for other parties willing to sell. He’ll let her know if he finds anything further.

Also on the phone, Olivia says no one’s ever said anything to her like that before. Brook walks in, but Olivia doesn’t know she’s there. Olivia says, they see through to her soul like no one else can. Brook clears her throat, and Olivia says she’s got to go. Brook asks if Olivia is going to pretend she didn’t walk in on an emotional phone call, and Olivia says, it’s not what it looks like. Brook says, it sounds like Olivia is having an affair behind her dad’s back.

Jax goes to Nina’s office, and she wonders if he’s checking up on her. He asks if she’d be upset if he was. He knows it’s a big day, and she asks if he’s there to wish her good luck. She doesn’t know if she should stand up for Nelle, but if she doesn’t, who else will?

Nelle swears to tell the truth with her hand on the Bible. Willow grasps Michael’s hand, and Carly shakes her head.

Laura tells Robert, she doesn’t understand. Did the ship not sink? He tells her, that’s not what he’s saying. Mac and Anna didn’t give him the whole story. The Bureau has a theory about the ship. Laura asks if Mac and Anna believe Holly survived, and he says he didn’t say that. They don’t know his ex-wife the way he does, but until he gets information on the Bureau’s theory about who sunk the ship, he can’t find whoever’s holding her. Does Laura think he’s nuts?

Olivia says she’s not cheating on Brook’s dad; she loves Ned very much. Brook says, when she came in, she clearly heard Olivia tell someone no one has ever said that to her before. Atrocious song lyrics, but it sounds like an affair. Olivia says, this is her house, and she doesn’t need to explain herself. Brook says, it’s Monica’s house. Alan gave it to her. (I laugh.) Olivia says, so they’re both guests in Monica’s house, and Brook says, if Olivia doesn’t want to tell her, she’ll tell her dad what she heard and he can judge for himself. Olivia says Ned has enough on his plate, not to mention the trouble Brook’s caused. How many times has she been arrested? Does the PCPD have a cell with her name on it yet? Brook says, they were misunderstandings, and Olivia asks if that’s what Brook is calling assault and disturbing the peace. She’s not having an affair. She was talking to a psychic.

Valentin tells Maxie, he brings good news. Deception is going to be one of the main sponsors of the 2020 Nurses Ball. Maxie says, the exposure alone will be huge, but she also thought it would be months before their launch party. Valentin says he’s excited about the shots, and Maxie tells Sasha, whatever she did to get her head back in the game, it worked. Sasha flashes back to the being given the vial of cocaine; a little something to get her through the shoot.

Jax says Nina told him that she had second thought; he’d like her to lean into them. She asks if he thinks it’s a mistake. Doesn’t he think Nelle deserves a second chance? He says, it’s true people change, but if she’s wrong, Wiley will pay the price. She knows the risk. Not only will a child suffer, she’ll feel responsible, and he doesn’t wish that on her. She says if she doesn’t stand up for Nelle, if she treats Nelle like everyone else does, and Nelle loses, there will be virtually no chance for Nelle to turn her life around.

Martin asks Nelle to tell the court how she felt when her baby was horribly and shamefully stolen. Diane objects, saying Martin isn’t asking questions, just giving his Southern fried opinion. The judge sustains it, but tells her to please refrain from descriptive adjectives. Martin asks what Nelle’s reaction was when the son she previously thought was dead, was alive. She says she was confused at first, and so overwhelmed that her little boy was alive. But she was also incredibly hurt to think Brad orchestrated the entire thing. She thought he was her friend. He switched her baby with the boy he adopted, and watched her grieve for nearly two years. How could he be so cruel? And when he asked Michael to be Wiley’s godfather, it was untenable. (Apparently, Nelle reads.) Martin says she wasn’t the only person hurt by Brad’s actions. Her new husband believed he was Wiley’s grandfather. She says, Jules bonded with the boy he believed was his grandson. Once he found out, the pain brought them closer together. Sam and Carly look at each other. She says they were shocked, but it gave them a connection – and possibly something more.

Brook asks where Olivia found a psychic? Late night TV? She laughs, and Ned says, enough. Brook says who spends good money on someone sitting in a call center? Olivia says the psychic isn’t in a call center. She’s well-renowned, and comes highly recommended. She’s sure it’s totally legit, and how else can she find out about Dante? Brook says she’s so sorry. She didn’t stop to think. Olivia says she never does, does she? She walks away, and Ned follows. He says he knows how bad she wants to be reassured about Dante, and Olivia says she doesn’t know what to do. Her letters come back unopened, and she has no way of knowing if he’s okay, or if he’s getting better. He says he’s sorry he hasn’t been available. He’s been so busy with ELQ, obsessing over who’s trying to mount a hostile takeover of the family’s shares, he didn’t see she’s obviously in pain.

Sasha tells Maxie, it was important to Deception, and a chance to prove herself. If the company does well, so will she. She knows a lot of people don’t trust her after she deceived Nina, and wanted to use every trick in the book. Maxie says that’s why they’re lucky to have her. Maxie suddenly stumbles a little, and Peter asks if she’s okay. She says she’s just a little lightheaded; probably too much coffee. Peter says, executive decision. She needs to take a break. She says, a short one, and then back to work. They leave, and Valentin asks if Sasha is okay.

Martin asks if Nelle and Julian are in love. Nelle says she would never speak for her husband. She respects him too much for that, so she’ll let him answer. What she will say is that Julian loves Wiley deeply. She knows he’d do anything to protect and keep her son safe. They have that in common, and the way Julian talks, she knows he loves Wiley abundantly, and will make an excellent co-parent. Sam looks sick, and Nelle says, Julian loves Wiley as much as she does. She could never find anything more appealing than that.

Nina tells Jax, she knows what it’s like to have no one in your corner, and hope things work out; what it’s like to be lonely. Jax says there are a lot of words he’d use in relation to Nelle, but Nelle isn’t lonely. Nina says Nelle feels abandoned, and with no one there to back her up, she might lash out. She might go back to prison. He says, if she does, it will be her own fault. Nina isn’t responsible. Nina remembers asking Nelle if she’s blackmailing Julian, and Nelle says she had to resort to desperate measures. Nina understands what mothers do to keep their child safe, and no one should be able to take them away.

Martin asks why Nelle feels she deserves sole custody of Wiley, and Nelle says she’s already lost two years with him. Then Michael cruelly kept Wiley away from her. He’s selfish and entitled; not lessons she wants passed on to her child. She’s paid her debt to society, has an amazing job at Crimson, roots in the community, and a husband who loves her son as much she does. She wants to dedicate the rest of her life to making sure Wiley has the home family deserves. Martin tells her, well said. He has no more questions. Diane says Nelle stated she has roots in the community, and wants to dedicate the rest of her life to make sure Wiley has the best family possible. Nelle says, that’s exactly what she wants. Diane asks her to tell the court, why on the night she allegedly discovered her son was alive, she raced to the apartment where Willow was taking care of him, and assaulted Willow? And then attempted to abduct Wiley, and take him out of the country. Martin objects, saying it’s inflammatory. Diane is clearly badgering the witness with pointless verbal assaults and unfounded accusations.

Laura tells Robert, they all believed Nikolas was dead, and were proven wrong. She’s the last person to give up hope of survival. She asks if Robert has any proof other than his gut feeling? Is there evidence? I have to interject, there’s about the same amount of evidence as there was with Nikolas – no body. Robert says the evidence is there, but he needs to find it. He could use a partner. He tried Luke, but his line has been disconnected. He asks if she has Luke’s current contact, but she says, sorry; she doesn’t. She thinks his best bet is to go through Tracy.

Olivia says, since when is someone is making a play for ELQ? and Ned says he’s had his suspicions for a while. Nelle sold her shares to an anonymous third party, and Tracy has rejected several offers for Dylan’s shares. He asks if they can talk about it later, and she says, of course (🍷). He tells her, Brook had no business eavesdropping, much less criticizing, but he’s not sure it’s the best way for Olivia to get help. Olivia says she feels helpless. Rocco had a Take Your Dad to School Day. He says, and Rocco didn’t have Dante. She says, even worse. Rocco could have taken Ned or Sonny, but he took Dustin. She confronted Lulu about why she was pushing Dustin on Rocco, and Lulu said it was Rocco’s idea. She’s only been seeing Dustin a couple of months, and Rocco is already looking at Dustin like a father figure. It’s like her son is being erased. If that happens, what motivation will Dante have to get better or come home? She feels like she’s running out of time. She gets that people think psychics are stupid or silly, but the psychic is the only person telling her it’s going to be okay. He says, if what’s happening to Dante happened to Brook, he’d go crazy, but doesn’t she think it’s possible the psychic is just telling her what she wants to hear?

Brook calls Linc, and says she saw his social media. She knows he’s staying in Port Charles, and needs a face to face with him.

Valentin says, he gathers Michael married Willow, but Sasha doesn’t reply. She picks up her bag, and he says, sorry about that. She says her personal life is personal. Their break-up had nothing to do with Deception, and doesn’t affect her role as the face of the brand or as a partner. Valentin says he genuinely wanted to check on her. He’s been where she is, and knows what it’s like to lose somebody based on something you’ve done. Nothing is ever as black and white as it looks on the surface.

Jax says Nina’s impulse to stand up for Nelle is admirable, but he doesn’t think Nelle is capable of accepting kindness; she’s too damaged. The worst outcome would be if she raised Wiley to follow in her footsteps, and he turns vindictive, and incapable of love. Nina’s phone makes noise, and she says she had an alert on it. If she’s going to testify, she needs to leave now.

Martin says there’s no evidence that his client was trying to flee the country; the charges were dismissed. Diane says, they were dismissed without prejudice, meaning they can be filed again, like with Nelle’s attack on Willow. She asks if Nelle loves her husband, and Nelle says, with every fiber in her being. Diane says, as of this morning, it would seem. She has no further questions. Michael asks what about sticking to the plan, and Diane tells him it never hurts to remind the court of the plaintiff’s alleged kidnapping charges. Martin calls Julian to the stand. Julian tells Nelle, he thought he wasn’t supposed to testify, and she says, buck up. Plans change, and it’s showtime. She doesn’t have to remind him what’s at stake. He sighs, and gets up.

Martin says there are a lot of opinions on their marriage, but the only two that are relevant belong to Julian and Nelle. He asks if it’s true that they want to give Wiley a loving stable home, and that’s why they married, and Julian says, true. Martin asks if it’s also true that Julian was the nurturing figure in Wiley’s life when he’s son Lucas tragically ended up in a coma. Julian says, when Lucas was in a coma, his husband Brad was an emotional wreck, and he stepped in to fill the void. Martin asks if it’s fair to say he loves Wiley as much as Lucas, and Julian says, that’s exactly how he feels. Martin says the elephant in the room is Julian’s prison record. He was sent to Pentenville. How long since he was released? Julian says, three years, and Martin asks, in that time, has he had any brush with the law? Julian says, not so much as a speeding ticket, and Martin asks what he does for a living. He says own Charlie’s pub, and Martin says, it has historical significance in Port Charles. Julian supposes it does, and Martin asks if it’s fair to say he cleaned up his life. Julian says he has, and Martin says they all commend him for it. He has no further questions, and Diane says, yes, the elephant in the room. Drug trafficking, assault, extortion, attempted murder… Martin says, not all of those have been proven, and she says, there was enough evidence to convict Julian. She asks who Alexis is to Julian, and he says, his ex-wife. Diane says, whose throat he held a knife to, and threatened to kill, as well as helping his sister (the other) Olivia try to blow up Port Charles. Julian says he was forced to do those things, and Diane says, he’s perfect for Wiley. She’s done with the witness. Nelle tells Martin, do something.

Maxie picks at her food, and pushes the plate away. Peter says she barely ate, and she says she’s not hungry. He doesn’t want to tell her what to do, but if she’s under the weather, maybe she should see a doctor. She says she loves that he’s looking out for her, but she doesn’t need a doctor. It’s just… He says, what is it?

Olivia tells Ned, they’ll have to agree to disagree. Her opinion about psychics is just as valid as his. He says he’s not trying to change what she believes, but he doesn’t want to see anyone take advantage of her pain. She says it’s the only thing giving her comfort. The doorbell rings. It’s Robert, who apologizes for showing up unannounced. He promises it won’t take long. Olivia tells him, come in, and Ned asks, what’s going on? Robert says, it’s not public knowledge, but Holly was on a boat that sank, and is believed to be dead. Olivia says she’s sorry, and Ned asks what he can do to help. Robert says, there are certain discrepancies in the Bureau’s report that don’t add up. He’d like to ask Luke for help, but the only way to contact him is through Ned’s mother. Ned says he’s been down that road with Luke, and Luke gets scratchy if he gives out the number. He’ll call his mother, and let her know what’s up. Robert says he appreciates it, and Ned goes to make the call. Olivia asks how Robert is holding up, and he says he hates every minute. The only thing worse than accepting the fact Holly is lost is that he’ll never see her again. Why does he have the feeling he’s not the only one who’s been through the wringer today?

Linc and Brook meet at the MetroCourt. He says he’s surprised she wants to hook up with him, but she says the only thing she has in mind is business. He says their business was concluded when she bought herself out. She says he never wanted her shares. He was just a front for a third party, and she wants to know who.

Sasha says she wishes she could trust Valentin. He says, it’s not tough. Talk to Lulu. She says according to Lulu, he’s always wrong. She posed as Nina’s daughter for the money, but she also knew there was no girl being cheated out of an inheritance. She knew he truly loved Nina, and the more she got to know Nina, it was clear Nina loved him back. Even after all this, she still has sympathy for what he was trying to accomplish. Sometimes you have to do the wrong thing for the right reason. He says that’s why he hired her; she’s a good person, and he knew she’s be a good daughter for Nina. She asks if he’s not sorry, and he says he is, and he’s sorry she’s still paying the price. If it’s any consolation, the brand is going to be a massive success, and make her a very wealthy woman. She says, too bad money can’t buy happiness, and Valentin agrees. He leaves, and Sasha flashes back to Michael telling her that he loves her, and her saying she loves him too.

Julian finds Sam in the hallway messing with her phone. She turns to him, and he says, Sam, please… She hauls off and smacks him good. As we all want to.

Julian tells Sam, he understands why she slapped him, but let him explain. She says, and make a bunch of excuses? Don’t bother. He asks her to hear him out. She says she told Lucas about his new stepmom. He says he’d hoped to tell Lucas himself, but she says she saved him the time. Lucas’s exact words were, Julian is dead to him, and after listening to his ridiculous testimony, she feels the same way. He says, Sam, please… and she says, don’t Sam please her anything. The worst part is he used the most painful thing that ever happened to Lucas against him, and allowed Nelle to weaponize Wiley to use against Michael. If Nelle gets custody, she was going to say she’d never talk to him again, but been there, done that. He’s dead to her too. He says everything he’s done, he did for his kids, and she says she’s not on that list anymore. She and Lucas are better off without him in their lives, and if Leo eventually comes to the same conclusion, they’ll be there to support him.

Olivia gives Robert some coffee, and he asks if she wants to talk about it. She says Brook overheard her call a psychic, and one thing led to another. She told Ned, and he was nicer than Brook was, but ultimately, he thinks the same thing. Robert says, who’s to say she’s certifiable? Not him. He spent time in the outback, and the Aborigines are a very spiritual people. What we look upon as superstitious, they look at as a natural part of life. He asks what she hopes to find, and she says, Dante. She needs to have some hope that he’ll be okay, especially since the whole world is moving on without him. She has to keep fighting, and believing he’s okay. If the only person who gives her hope is a psychic, Robert must think she’s crazy. He says she doesn’t want to give up hope, and he doesn’t want to give up hope about Holly. There’s nothing crazy about that. Ned comes in, as Olivia takes Robert’s hand.

Brook tells Linc, it all makes sense. The way he stonewalled, then agreed to let her buy herself out. The shares weren’t for him. He’s the front man. Who’s pulling the strings? He says, whatever decision he made about the shares is none of her business. She asks who he sold them to. She’s not leaving until he gives her a name.

Valentin sees Laura at the MetroCourt, and she tells him that she’s curious. Did he get an invitation to Windymere for the unveiling of Ava’s portrait? He says he did. He thought it was a joke, but doesn’t know if it was Ava or Nikolas twisting the knife. She hopes he chooses not to go, for Charlotte’s sake. And Nikolas’s. He doesn’t need any more trouble, even though he’s asking for it. He says he threw it away. He doesn’t need to prove anything to anyone in Port Charles.

Julian goes back into the courtroom. Judge Lowe asks when they can expect Martin’s next witness, and Diane says, yes. How long are they supposed to wait for this mythical witness? Nina and Jax walk in, and Martin says, here she is now. Not so mythical after all. Quel disappointment.

Martin calls Nina to the stand. Jax sits next to Carly, who asks what the hell they’re doing. He says he has no idea.

Maxie looks at a calendar on her phone, while Peter takes a business call. When he comes back, he says she hasn’t taken another bite. Is she sure she’s okay? She says, she’s sure it’s stress from work, but maybe he’s right, and she should see a doctor.

Sasha digs in her bag, and the woman who gave her the coke appears with another vial. She says, for next time, but Sasha says, it was a one-time thing. The woman says, keep it. You never know when you’ll need another boost.

Laura calls Anna, and leaves a message to give her a call when Anna has a few minutes to talk. She ran into Robert, and to be honest, she’s worried about him.

Ned comes back, and gives Robert the number to Luke’s latest burner phone, and says Luke is expecting his call. Robert thanks him, and says he appreciates it. Olivia tells Robert to look out for himself, and he tells her to do the same. After he leaves, Ned says Olivia seems like she’s feeling better, and she says she is. She guesses you never know who will come up with the right words to say.

Linc tells Brook, it was a one-time deal, and he has zero obligation to tell her anything. The person wants to remain anonymous. She says she still hasn’t gone public with what he did to her. Powerful men have lost careers because of me-too. He asks if she’s threatening him, and Valentin comes by. He says let him take it from here, and Linc leaves. He tells Brook, he’s been looking forward to this moment. He’s heard a lot about her.

Nina is asked if she’ll tell the truth. She hesitates. She looks at Jax, then looks at Nelle. She swears to tell the truth. So help her God.

There was no preview for Monday, but tomorrow’s GH is from April 1, 2015, and contains scenes from the original first episode in 1963.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Leah meets LuAnn for lunch. Both of them aren’t feeling well, with some kind of respiratory ailments. Hmm… In Leah’s interview, she says, the orchard trip was bullsh*t. They wait for Tinsley, and order in the meantime. LuAnn says, poor Sonja, and Leah says she did it to herself. We see a clip of Sonja throwing up in the limo, way too close to Tinsley. Leah says she loves crazy, but this is bad crazy. Dorinda, Sonja, even Ramona. LuAnn says, they have their issues.

Ramona, Dorinda, and Sonja go for a workout with Ramona’s instructor Bergen. Ramona says Bergen transformed her body. Dorinda says, yesterday was a long day. Bergen puts  them through their paces. How any of them can work out after what they consumed the day before is mind boggling. It’s not like they’re eighteen.

Leah tells LuAnn that she’s sympathetic and empathetic. Dorinda is grieving and dealing with the break-up, but to say what she did to Tinsley… Leah wonders where it’s coming from. LuAnn says, there’s a lot of judgment on Dorinda’s part. They have to step in and help figure it out. Tinsley joins them, also coughing.

Sonja says, this is the worst punishment ever. In her interview, she says, workouts shouldn’t even be legal. Dorinda says she thought it was beautiful yesterday, and Ramona says it was a beautiful setting. Dorinda says she thinks Ramona is concerned about Sonja, and Sonja says when she sees them go off rails. Ramona was overly friendly and flirtatious. Ramona says Sonja wasn’t in control, and past the point. She wants Sonja healthy and happy. Sonja says she has to be careful out in public. Sonja asks what was with Dorinda yelling at Tinsley, and Dorinda says Tinsley has played the victim and little girl enough. They could all be victims.

LuAnn say she’s had issues with all the women in the past, and Tinsley’s reaction is defensive and yelling. In her interview, LuAnn says, Tinsley does the wrong thing. She screeches, and Dorinda reacts with aggression because she’s annoyed. Leah thinks the real issue is that Tinsley was born into a life that Dorinda puts on a pedestal. LuAnn says, that doesn’t mean she can judge and get away with it. Leah says Tinsley has to stop being defensive. In Leah’s interview, she says, if you let people walk all over you, and don’t make them respect you, it’s never going to happen. If Tinsley stood up to Dorinda, and said, bitch, mind your own business, Dorinda would back off.  She says, Tinsley needs to thug her out, and LuAnn says Tinsley screams like a child having a tantrum. Tinsley stamps her foot, and says that’s just her.

Ramona tells Dorinda, Tinsley is mentally and emotionally not her age. She feels sorry for Tinsley. Dorinda says, God helps those who help themselves (which, BTW, is found nowhere in the Bible). In Ramona’s interview, she says, Dorinda thinks Tinsley plays the victim, but Dorinda is victimizing Tinsley. She tells Dorinda, it’s challenging to be around them. Tinsley is psychologically co-dependent, and Dorinda is frustrated. Dorinda needs to take a step back. Someone didn’t give Tinsley the right tools.

Tinsley says Dorinda is doing, and she’s reacting. Leah suggests an intervention, which doesn’t get a positive reaction. LuAnn says maybe at a health spa could be cool, as long as nothing gets broken. It’s totally up to Tinsley. Leah tells Tinsley not to go Cardi B, but go Dalai Lama. Cardi Lama.

Dorinda goes to see life coach Daryl. She tells him that she recognizes where her anger is coming from; it’s frustration, and it comes out because she wants a person to be the best they can be. In her interview, she says she started with Dr. Daryl three months ago, to help her process what’s going on. It became too much, and she’s not good at asking for help. She tells Daryl that she and Tinsley are too different for her to tolerate Tinsley. Daryl says they can be respectful when they’re face to face. All we see is what’s on the surface, when underneath is a whole world we don’t know about. Dorinda says she handled it poorly because she’s going through something. In Dorinda’s interview, she says dealing with the house and the break-up is having an effect on her personality. She’s been going through the house thing for a year, and she’s not just throwing away part of her life. It’s under water, and too painful to go through, plus, it’s ruined. Daryl sees that it stirs up her emotions. Dorinda says, it’s making her angry toward people. She felt lost after Richard died, but instead of taking it on, and allowing herself to be in a sea of it, she pretended everything was okay. She didn’t acknowledge the tremendous loss, from motherhood down, that was making her angry. In her interview, Dorinda says, she never put a period on the life she once had. In the process of resurrecting the house, she had to let go of a lot of things that, without knowing it, kept her tied to the past. Daryl says, she feels stuck, and Dorinda thinks that’s what got her here. She was trying to explain it to John. She’s trying to be completely selfish, and mindful of herself about what’s going on. Daryl asks about John, but Dorinda says she hasn’t seen him. In her interview, she says her daughter said she and John met too quickly after Richard’s death, but you do what you’ve got to do. She doesn’t regret it, and she’ll always love John, but she’s in a different place than she was when she met him. Daryl tells her to focus on what she needs to do. She needs time and space. She says she’s sort of enjoying it; it’s a relief to just worry about herself. Her life is quieter, and she needed the noise to go away. She can’t take it right now. Daryl says she’s always been taking care of someone else. She can still do that, but put her own needs first. She says, it feels good.

In LuAnn’s interview, she says when she heard it would be a spa day, she didn’t think of a Russian bath house. We see a clip of Leah on the phone, saying she wants get the group to go to a place in the neighborhood. It’s an oasis of relaxation, and good for detoxing. Maybe they can get to a better place. They definitely need something to relax as a group. In her interview, Leah says, it’s a New York institution, and has more character than an East Side spa.

Tinsley wanders in, and the woman at the reception desk gives her a locked box to put her jewelry in. Tinsley tells her, thanks, but no thanks. Leah orders lunch for the women, and meets Tinsley at the vodka bar. It’s really cool. There are glass jars of fresh herbs and fruits that the vodka is strained through. Tinsley tries a ginger shot, and declares it delicious. The bartender tells her that Russians don’t sip; they down the shot. She says she’s American.

In the limo, Dorinda tells LuAnn that she doesn’t go downtown much, and LuAnn say she’s not thrilled. Dorinda says the only time she’s down there is for a legal certificate, jury duty, or jail. I actually had jury duty there once. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, past Canal Street, there’s a weather change; it gets greyer. Geez. Elitist much? LuAnn says she’s only been down there when she got a summons. LuAnn says she had lunch with Leah and Tinsley, and Dorinda says she’s sure she was the topic. LuAnn says they were trying to figure out how to approach her, so they can make things better. Leah thought gangster was the way to go. Dorinda says that’s why she and Leah get along. Leah is also a great mother, and Dorinda respects that. Leah has been through a lot, and Dorinda doesn’t want to live in a fantasy world like Tinsley.

Everyone – clients and employees – is given a Gilligan type hat to protect your head, but I’m not sure from what. In Ramona’s interview, she says the spa is rustic, and not what she’s used to. It reflects how Leah is; rough around the edges. Ramona tells Tinsley to let things go with Dorinda. She told Dorinda that she was being a bully. Leah says, positive vibes only.  

As Dorinda and LuAnn approach the spa, Dorinda mentions there’s a strip club down the road. Sonja wanders in after them, and says, oh Lord. Inside, Ramona looks in the mirror and says she would pick up herself. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she’s going to let things go. She and Dorinda can stay on opposite sides of the room; that’s how they’re going to play it. Sonja comes in and asks if this is where jury duty is. In her interview, Sonja says, there’s graffiti everywhere. She avoids areas like this uptown, and downtown, it’s everywhere. Leah says they’re doing the dry sauna first. Sonja says, it’s like a prison; very bare bones. As they sit in the sauna, Dorinda informs Leah that Richard never knew she had fake boobs, and insists Leah feel them. They move on to a massage called banya. One of the couples on 90 Day Fiancé did this too. A couple of dudes hit them with branches as they lie on the tables. Ramona says she’s getting beaten by weeds. LuAnn feels like she’s being attacked by a tree. There’s some sexual banter, and in Leah’s interview, she says she thought she was horny. These women are more desperate than she is. In LuAnn’s interview, she says if she’s going to be beaten by a bush, she wants two hot guys to do it. I’m shocked they didn’t take this opportunity to show the clip that keeps on giving – LuAnn drunkenly falling into a bush. She says she’s turning over a new leaf, and probably wondering how she can include this in her cabaret act. Ramona thinks it’s a little sensual, and Leah says it’s the most action had in a while. In Sonja’s interview, she says she doesn’t know what this does, but after this, she might try S&M. Tinsley doesn’t want to do it (no surprise), and Leah tells her that she’s not being a part of things. In Tinsley’s interview, she says how does she know she’s not allergic to the branches, and it looks weird. Next is a foot scrub, which gets a little more interest, and now I’m jealous. They’re told to lie face down for the foot scrub, but Dorinda says, the last time she did that, she ended up with Hannah.

They go to a room with a private hot tub, where lunch is laid out; a beautiful spread of upscale Russian food, with caviar of course. LuAnn says crazy parties must go on in this room. The women descend on the caviar, since it’s something they recognize. Leah makes a toast, saying, when they first met, she thought she wouldn’t fit in as a downtown girl. But as time has gone by, they’ve opened up to her, and she appreciates it. They clink glasses. LuAnn thanks Leah for bringing them down there. She’s never seen anything like it. Ramona says she’s been looking into the group going to Newport, Rhode Island. LuAnn says, it’s gorgeous (truth! I’ve been there), and Ramona says it’s about a three-hour tour drive. In Leah’s interview, she says, before they plan another trip, they have some leftover drama to handle from the last trip. Nobody is talking about what they should be talking about. Leah says she feels like there’s an elephant in the room. She tells them, she speaks from the heart. After the orchard trip, she cried, and they need to acknowledge their sh*t. She saw people attacking each other a lot, and she thinks they should acknowledge that. Dorinda says she acknowledges it, and LuAnn says, Tinsley felt ganged up on, and rightly so. Dorinda says it was Tinsley’s flip comment that started it. We flash back to Tinsley at the orchard, mumbling about Dorinda being judgmental. Ramona says they want to figure out a way for that not to happen again. She tells Dorinda, there’s a pattern when she’s upset. She goes for the jugular, and hits below the belt. Ramona doesn’t think Dorinda recognizes it. Dorinda says Ramona does it all the time, so she can recognize it easily. In Ramona’s interview, she says there Dorinda goes, flipping it around, and pointing fingers at someone else, because she doesn’t want to recognize it in herself. Dorinda throws in how Ramona asked what she’d do if she found John texting other women when they were in a group. We flash back to that, and Ramona counters with the time Dorinda made a snide remark about a mug shot to LuAnn, and we flash back to that. Ramona says Dorinda does it all the time, and Dorinda tells Ramona that you don’t say things like that in a group, and she should pull Dorinda aside. In Dorinda’s interview, she calls Ramona a living vampire. She sucks the life out of people, Ramona tells Dorinda not to make it about her, and LuAnn says she’s not being specific. Leah says she wasn’t trying to blow up the table. She wanted to have a dialogue. She adores and respects all of them, and has a special bond with Dorinda. But she’s terrified that if she does something wrong, she’ll be on the other side of it. Ramona says Dorinda is scary, and Dorinda says she’s scared of Ramona. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, Dorinda goes for someone else, so it’s not about her. Tinsley says she respects Dorinda, and doesn’t judge her, and Dorinda insists she doesn’t do that. Everyone clinks glasses, probably because they gave up, and Leah says, a judgement free zone. Dorinda wanders off, and LuAnn says, a cease fire is good.

Leah’s sister Sarah comes by Leah’s place. In Leah’s interview, she says her sister is basically her times 100. They’re like twins, and share a bit of the same soul. It gets intense, but at this point they’re both adults, moms, and best friends. Leah tells Sarah that she has a salad from Pita Chip Guy. In her interview, Leah explains that Pita Chip Guy is a guy she’s dating who owns a kosher restaurant and pita bakery. She loves Jews; she can’t help it. He’s quirky, funny, and intelligent, and she wants to see where it goes. She tells Sarah that she took a nude picture with pita chips in a strategic place, and Pita Chip Guy sent the picture to her, thinking he was sending it to someone else. Sarah thinks he just made a mistake, and it’s not big deal. In her interview, Leah says she likes weirdos. She likes intellectuals, who are smart and funny, and likes dating ugly guys. She wants to be a beauty, and needs a beast. She asks Sarah how their mom and dad are, and Sarah says she doesn’t want to make Leah upset. Their mom is upset about her. In Leah’s interview, she says she and her mother are on speaking terms again. We flash back to Ramona advising her to talk to her mom in person. She says there was lingering  tension, and now they’re just leaving it alone. She tells Sarah that she thinks their mom wants her to stop telling her everything. Sarah says Leah’s way to connect has always been bad behavior, and Leah says she needs to learn how to stop that dynamic. In her interview, she says she’s caught in an old dynamic with her mother, even though they’re different and the relationship is different now. Sarah suggests Leah engage in conversation that’s about their mother, not her. Its basic.

Ramona has a girls night at her place, including Elyse, Nicole, and a couple of other women we don’t know. In her interview, Ramona says it’s a great way to build relationships. She has different groups over, and plays matchmaker with her women friends. She tells Elyse that she’s feeling finally her new home. Elyse asks if Ramona has condoms in her nightstand, and when Ramona says no, Elyse wants to check for herself. In her interview, Elyse says that Ramona likes to play the innocent Catholic girl, but then talks about how horny she is, and how she’s never been hotter. Ramona says when she was in a relationship, she kept them for her boyfriend. Sometimes he needed extras. She says she’s embarrassing herself, like that’s possible. Elyse says she wants to sleep with Ramona if it’s that good.

Sonja arrives, bringing Ramona a dress to replace the one with the broken zipper. We see a picture of Ramona in it, and it’s very pretty – a lace overlay on a nude foundation. Dorinda comes in next, and in Ramona’s interview, she says it was a sh*t show with her and Dorinda yesterday, but she’d already invited her, so she hopes Dorinda is in a good mood, and being the old Dorinda. In Sonja’s interview, she says when they were in the locker room at the spa, Ramona said she should lose ten pounds because she’s beautiful. She’s beautiful with the ten pounds. Dorinda tells Elyse about the spa, and Elyse says she knows it from when she worked in the area, and businessmen would take strippers there. Ramona doesn’t want Dorinda thinking she doesn’t respect her, and Dorinda says that what Ramona did was wrong. Ramona says Dorinda takes people down all the time. Dorinda whips out her phone, and asks if Ramona knows what schadenfreude means. Elyse says, you don’t wish ill on people, but if something bad happens, you get pleasure out of it. Dorinda says Ramona will bring up something from years ago, when they’re supposed to be friends. She needs support. Ramona says Dorinda lashes out when she’s questioned.

Ramona tries to get Dorinda to talk in private, but Dorinda won’t have it. In Ramona’s interview, she says it’s ironic that Dorinda doesn’t want her to bring things up in front of other people, but when they’re in front of people Dorinda doesn’t know, she’s going off like a crazy woman. Dorinda claims Ramona fat shamed Sonja, who called her up crying. Ramona loves for them to do well, but not better than she is. Ramona says Dorinda is so angry, and Dorinda says Ramona likes people’s misfortune. She likes to make people feel bad, and she’s a coward. Does she think it’s nice to bring up something from two years ago? Ramona asks if Dorinda thinks what she did to Tinsley was nice. She’s sorry Dorinda is unhappy, and sorry Richard died. She’s sorry Dorinda’s anniversary is coming up. Dorinda says she’s sorry so many men have come and gone in Ramona’s life. Elyse tells them to stop, and Dorinda jets with Sonja. Elyse says they’re both nuts. Ramona tells her, Dorinda said if there’s something negative to say, it should be done in private. Why does she do what she doesn’t want done? In the hallway, Sonja says she wants to be herself, and if she wants to be fat, why is Ramona shaming her? I see she latched onto that now. Ramona hunts them down, and says she loves them both. Dorinda starts crying, and says she needed support yesterday, wagging her finger in Ramona’s face. She just left a seven and a half year relationship. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it’s not an easy time; there’s a slight depression. She doesn’t need to be knocked down; she needs a soft place to land. Ramona isn’t a pillow; she’s a concrete block. Dorinda says Ramona is like a sister to her. Ramona takes Dorinda’s hand, and asks her to come back; she loves them both. As they head back in, Dorinda says she knows her delivery sucks. She’s been trying with a life coach. She doesn’t want to be alone again. Ramona says she’s afraid she’s going to be alone forever, and she, Dorinda, and Sonja have a three-way hug. Elyse says the three of them could drive Mother Teresa to drink. In Ramona’s interview, she says she loves Dorinda, but she won’t admit how mean-spirited she is. When Dorinda is like this, nothing will work. There’s nothing you can do. Just shut your mouth.

Next time, a trip to Newport, Sonja says maybe she’ll get her mojo back, Leah goes on another drunken rampage, and Ramona doesn’t like the behavior.

🍤  On Top Chef, Melissa was bummed because Restaurant Wars threw her off, and she’d been on the bottom in the challenges. She was in an emotional rut. Stephanie was also down, having lost her brother to addiction a year and a half ago. In her interview, she said she’d come out stronger, and that’s why she was there – it was her victory song. Padma introduced the guest judge, pastry chef and three time James Beard Award winner Sherry Yard. Padma told the chefs that the Quickfire challenge was going to be a piece of cake. Sherry said baking was all about time, temperature, taste, and methodology. The chefs would get the basic pantry staples – dairy, flour, sugar, and eggs – but the rest of their ingredients would come from a blindfold taste test. They had five minutes to guess twenty ingredients. Whichever ingredients they guessed right, they could use, although they didn’t have to use them all. The chef who guessed the highest number of ingredients would get an hour, the next two would get forty-five minutes, and the last two, a half hour. All Padma would say about the winner is that they’d get a huge advantage in the elimination challenge that would be worth fighting for. Stephanie guessed the most ingredients – fifteen, with twelve seconds to spare. Next, Gregory and Melissa tied with twelve, and at the bottom was the other white Bryan, guessing only seven correctly. The biggest stumbling block seemed to be almond butter, which most of them guessed to be peanut butter. I thought this was kind of odd, since I find almond butter to have a very distinctive taste. After the chefs presented their desserts, the judges loved Karen’s flavor, but thought it was too aggressive; Bryan’s components fought on the plate; but Melissa’s flavors sang, and she was the winner.

Next, Padma said, let the games begin, and introduced the chefs’ helpers and guest judges  Niki and Carole Nakayama, Michelin star chefs and co-owners of two Michelin star restaurants. In honor of the Tokyo Olympics, the chefs would be making food inspired by Japan – a kaiseki meal of six courses, the most formal way of dining in Japan, and similar to a tasting menu. They were told kaiseki is a celebration of nature, about protecting the integrity of the ingredient, and cooking with restraint, which made full of Malarkey quake in his shoes. Given two hours to cook, each chef would make one dish, and they would be cooking for a group of elite Olympic athletes. The Nakayama sisters treated the chefs to a kaiseki meal so they could get the vibe.

Before the dinner began, Padma said both sporting events and food bring people together. She was excited to be doing something joyous and traditionally Japanese. As usual, everything looked incredibly impressive, and sounded phenomenal, except for the piece of shell in Melissa’s crab dish.

Stephanie was the winner, with a balance of flavor and ingredients. She was quite shocked, and would also be going to the Tokyo Olympics. Unfortunately, we all know how that would eventually turn out. She joked that she was probably the least athletic of the group. Karen’s duck dish caused her to be told to pack her knives and go. In her interview, she said she’d been eliminated twice for a good dish, had done things she never thought she would try, learned tenacity, and cooked her ass off. It was on to Last Chance Kitchen for her, as she told us, never say die.

They never did reveal what the huge advantage was the elimination challenge winner would receive. I can’t imagine it was the trip to the Olympics. Next time, the finale goes to Europe, and a possible bail by Brian full of Malarkey.

🏖 Life’s a Beach Again…

It looks like the world is starting to open back up. As I’ve come to say every week, whatever happened to the Shahs reunion? All continues to be quiet on the Sunset front, and I have yet to see a ransom note. Regardless, see you tomorrow with some tea and words of wisdom. Until then, stay safe, stay exercising caution, and stay puffed.

May 14, 2020 – The Custody Hearing Begins, Getting Lost In a Maze, Chefs At Camp & Alive


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

At Charlie’s, Finn tells Anna, the lab rans tests, and it was a rare case of alienitus. They quarantined the patient until last night, when his chest burst open, and out crawled a big slimy alien. Anna says, interesting, and he says, it turned out the alien was friendly, so he gave it a bath, named it E.T., and he’s bringing it home to Violet. Anna says, an alien? He says, let him guess. Her mind is on Holly. She says, you know the word frenemy? It’s cliché, but it pretty accurately describes their relationship. They were rivals and allies. They admired each other, but annoyed each other. Holly could run a con like no one else; even better than her. She had a lighter touch, and Anna was a little jealous. She knew Holly was on the other side of the world, but expected her to turn up there again one day. It’s not going to happen now. Finn says he’s sorry. Sometimes the best response to a sudden loss is a life affirming decision. She asks if he has something in mind, and he says he does.

Sasha lies on her bed, face down, fully clothed. The phone rings, and Maxie asks where she is. Don’t tell her that Sasha forgot about the photoshoot. The entire crew is waiting, and there’s no face of Deception for the cover. Sasha says she’ll be right there, and Maxie says she has five minutes, or she’s finding another model. Lulu comes to see Maxie, along with Charlotte. She asks how it’s going, and Maxie says, Sasha is late, the wardrobe mistress isn’t there, and the coffee is cold. The shoot is going to implode, and take her career with it.

Laura sits at Jax’s table at the MetroCourt, and tells him that she just came from the fundraiser breakfast. She found out he made a generous donation. He says sorry he couldn’t be there in person, but he has a meeting of his own. He’s waiting for Nina, but he’s all ears until she gets there. How did it go? She says, better than expected, thanks to him, and a couple of other generous donations. He says he’s sure her presence has something to do with the success. He’s grateful for her hard work and integrity. She says she’s only as good as the people she represents, and he tells her, don’t be modest. She’s not afraid to tell the truth, and has an amazing ability to inspire others. She says, one can only hope.

Sasha gets in the elevator, and Nina says, tough morning? Sasha says she has no idea, but Nina says, actually, she thinks she does.

Valentin meets Martin at the MetroCourt, and asks if Martin has good news. Martin thinks he’ll be well pleased at the progress. He’s acquired numerous shares from Quartermaines spread far and wide. Valentin says he doesn’t have controlling interest yet, and Martin says, not yet. Valentin says, not yet, but he’s closer than the Quartermaines realize.

Chase asks how he can help Carly, and she tells him that she’s pretty sure he’s aware that Willow and Michael got married. He says she must be very happy, and she says she regrets what the decision cost him.

Diane asks where Michael has been, and he says he was at Turning Woods; his dad was visiting Mike. She asks how Mike is doing, and he says, not great. They want to put in a feeding tube, and his dad is trying to decide. She says she’s sure he was a comfort to Sonny; however, moving forward his priority needs to be Wiley. He needs to be calm, collected, and focused. Taking away a child from its mother is difficult under the best circumstances, even a mother as awful as Nelle. He says, things may have gotten easier, and she asks, how? Willow walks in, and asks Michael how it went at Turning Woods. Michael says, rough; her? She says, the same. Diane says, what a gorgeous ring. One might say spectacular. Michael says it belonged to his great-grandmother, and now it belongs to his wife. He and Willow got married last night.

Finn says he and Anna have talked about it; it’s time to do something about it. She says, do something about what? and he says, the thing where people say I do. They can at least pick a date, and send invitations out. She says, after Violet’s party, he’s in the mood for another, and he says he’s learned to appreciate a good celebration. She tells him, he’s turning into a romantic, and he asks if that’s a good thing. She says, it’s a great thing. She looks at her phone, and says, August maybe. It gives them time to plan, and time to figure out what to wear. He says, August is perfect, and they almost kiss, but Robert interrupts. He says, isn’t this cozy? They’re acting like nothing happened, when they know something did. He tells Anna, stop running around telling people what he can and can’t be told.

Chase tells Carly that he doubts Michael wants to see him, but let Michael know he hopes they give Wiley the life he deserves. She says, that’s the plan. The custody hearing is today. He asks why she’s there instead of in court, and she says, there’s someone she needs to thank.

Nina says Sasha just broke up with Michael, and Sasha says Nina was right about her. She’s not good enough. Nina thinks the person Sasha hurt the most is herself. Sasha tells her, don’t be nice, not today, but Nina says Sasha put in the knife and she doesn’t feel like twisting it. She hopes Sasha finds peace and love, and hopes the pain she’s in is gone forever. Sasha gets out of the elevator, and Nina looks puzzled.

Maxie screams for the wardrobe mistress, and someone hands her hot coffee. Lulu says Maxie will be brilliant. She works best in a crisis. Maxie says she loves Lulu, but her pep talk isn’t working. This was her moment in the spotlight; taking a tired company from the 90s and turning it into a power brand. Does Lulu see a power brand happening? What she sees are Maxie’s dreams and plans disintegrating. Sasha comes in, and Charlotte says she thought Sasha was a model; she looks terrible. Lulu tells her to apologize, but Sasha says, Charlotte is just telling it how she sees it. Maxie asks if Sasha wants to tank Deception before it even launches, and tells the makeup artist to make his magic. Charlotte asks if she can watch, and Lulu asks if it’s okay. Sasha says, it’s time to turn this toad into a swan, and leaves with the makeup artist. Lulu tells Maxie, nothing but a straight road ahead, and Maxie says, until the next curve. She wanted to be boss, and all she can do is think of what Nina would do. Nina walks in, and says, she just asked the person she trusted most – Maxie.

Finn realizes Robert is upset, but tells him, take it down a notch. Anna says, sit down, and asks Finn to get some coffee. Robert says he talked to Mac, who said she had suspicions. Why did Mac have to tell him, and not her? She says, the WSB is still looking for the reason the ship sank, and Robert says, his shelf life has expired, so he can’t be told? She says she has no evidence of foul play. When she finds some, he’ll be the first to know. He asks what she thinks. Has she seen discrepancies in the report that point to murder?

Nina says she saw Sasha, and came to offer moral support. Maxie appreciates it, but it only makes her more nervous. Lulu asks if Nina will do her a favor. Charlotte begged to be taken to the shoot before she meets Valentin, and Lulu is late for an Invader interview. She has a deadline, and asks if Nina would mind taking Charlotte. Nina says she’d be thrilled; she was headed there anyway. She tells Maxie, just for the record, no one knows how to manage a shoot like her. She didn’t leave Crimson to second guess herself. She left to be boss. She finally decided to be a superstar, and she is. Don’t give in. Those who play small aren’t stars, and never will be. Toughen up, get the job done, and be a star.

Jax tells Laura that he’s surprised Valentin didn’t fight harder for the estate. He could have dragged it out in court for years. Laura says, maybe he realized the Cassadine estate is both a blessing and a curse. Jax says, a valuable one, and she says, don’t worry. She’s sure Valentin will find a way to make money.

Valentin asks if Martin had any trouble, and Martin says, nothing they can’t overcome. Ned is preoccupied with Brook, and Michael has the custody battle. Speaking of which, he has to get to court for it. Valentin says, Drew is dead, and Jason has no interest, but what about the children? He asks Martin to look into who’s controlling their shares.

Diane says Willow is a brave woman. She married into both the Quartermaine and Corinthos families. She’s sure Willow is aware that as individuals, they’re all a bit difficult, but as a group, they’re fearless, intelligent, and never boring. And Michael is the best of the lot. Willow says she thinks so. Diane says she doesn’t know why she didn’t think it. Of course (🍷) they’re a perfect match, and not just for a courtroom stunt. She thinks they’ll be happy and better parents for Wiley. Let her know where they’re registered. Willow says she thinks she can speak for Michael. The only gift they need is knowing Wiley is safe from Nelle.

Carly tells Chase, she used to think people who were noble were stupid, that they were suckers. Until someone she loved and respected made a sacrifice for the sake of her child. She didn’t appreciate it at the time, until she realized their sacrifice changed everything. What they did made Michael’s life better. Chase hopes it works out that way for Wiley, and she says, her too. When the judge sees them, they’ll see two people who love Wiley, and would do anything to ensure he grows up in a loving safe home. So if he ever crosses paths with the person who made it happen, let them know she’ll always cherish their selfless actions. He says he will.

Charlotte tells Valentin, they put makeup on Sasha, and she looks beautiful. Valentin says, it sounds like she had fun, and Charlotte says she used to be mad at Sasha, but now she feels bad for her. She doesn’t think Sasha felt good, but she still took pictures. He says it’s good she has compassion. It’s not good to be angry and resentful. Charlotte thanks Nina, and Nina says she’ll see Charlotte again soon. If they ask nice, maybe her papa will let them have a girls night out. Laura and Jax come by, and Laura tells Charlotte, what a surprise, and asks for a hug. Nina tells Jax, sorry she’s late. She needed to make a special delivery. Jax says it’s good to see Laura, and she says him too, and thanks him again for his donation. She leaves, and Jax asks Nina what she wanted to talk to him about. She thanks him for providing the hand holding when she was worried about Nelle. He says, no thanks are required, and she says, but she can’t lean on him forever. It’s time to take control of her own life.

Maxie says everything is under control, and Lulu says Maxie would make an excellent general if she ever choses to join the Army. Sasha asks where she’s wanted, and Maxie says she’ll leave that up to the photographer. Lulu says, while they wait, can she ask come pre-photoshoot questions? Sasha says, like what? and Lulu says, nothing hard core. Her Invader audience would like to know what it’s like to launch a new business. Where does she imagine it’s going, and where does she see herself in five years? Sasha says she hasn’t thought that far ahead. She tries to take it one day at a time. She doesn’t know what tomorrow looks like, let alone five years from now. She starts to cry, and Maxie comes in. She asks what Lulu said to her, and Lulu says she was talking about the future. Maxie says the makeup artist probably left already. Give them a moment alone. She tells Sasha that Lulu shouldn’t have asked; Sasha probably has no idea how Chase fits into her future. Sasha says she and Chase aren’t together. Maxie says, she wants to help take care of Sasha’s personal life, but not today. Today, they’re businesswomen, and their future depends on the Deception launch. She has a crew who cost a fortune sitting around waiting. Sasha needs to pull herself together. She can have a cry afterward, and Maxie will hold her hand. Maxie gave up great career for this, and doesn’t want to regret it.

Carly sees Martin, and asks where his client is. Still sleeping under a rock? Martin doesn’t believe they’ve been formally introduced and introduces himself. She says she would say it’s a pleasure, but she’d be lying. He asks if she doesn’t believe everyone is entitled to a fair hearing and worthy representation. She says she believes in justice for those who deserve it. He says he couldn’t agree more, and she says she’ll have to tell her husband they have something in common. Her husband is Michael’s father. He does know Sonny Corinthos, doesn’t he?

Sasha dabs at her eyes, and flashes back to Michael berating her and Chase. Michael says he just has one question to start. How long has this been going on?

Anna tells Robert, she has no proof either way. Finn comes back, and Robert asks if Anna thinks Holly might still be alive. She says that’s exactly the reason why she didn’t tell him; he jumps to conclusions. If he thinks she’s doubting it, he’ll go chase ghosts like he always does. Robert tells Finn, once before they thought Holly was dead in a plane crash, but she’d been in a car crash. Then she tried to return to Port Charles to recover. Finn asks, for what reason? To face death again? Anna says, a ship went down; Holly isn’t the only one missing, and Robert says, there were discrepancies enough for Anna to discuss it with his brother. Which leads him to believe she’s not sure whether Holly is dead or not. Finn tells Robert not to get his hopes up, and Robert says, take heart. In the meantime, he has a call to make.

A woman comes into the dressing room, and Sasha says, tell Maxie she’ll be ready in a minute. The woman says she didn’t come for Maxie, and gives Sasha a vial of cocaine. She says, something to get through the shoot. Sasha says she doesn’t, and the woman says she doesn’t either, except for really tough days.

Chase sees Lulu, and asks if the photoshoot is over. Lulu says, Maxie gave everyone a break; she’s trying to salvage the day. He asks, what happened? and she says, Sasha was a mess. She overslept, was hungover, and can’t stop crying. He says, sorry, and she says, it’s too late for apologies. She thought he was a decent, but he was just good at hiding what a jerk he is. Maxie and Lucy put everything into this, and won’t just lose their investment, but their reputations. He asks what he can do, and she says, Sasha is in makeup. Tell her whatever he needs to, so they can move on.

Martin says he’s well-aware of Sonny’s history, and how those who displease him disappear. He’s sure Carly has been instructed on how not to make incriminating statements. She says she has no idea what he’s talking about. Her husband is a businessman like any other. He does have powerful connections though, and an ambitious lawyer could find them lucrative. Diane walks in with Michael and Willow. He says, Michael Corinthos and Willow Tate, and Willow says, it’s Corinthos now. Martin says, a sudden marriage before a court date; he’ll have to keep an eye on her. Diane says, who is she to stand in the way of a committed, stable union?

Valentin sees Laura sitting at his table. He asks to what he owes the pleasure, and she says she’s just checking in. How was the drop off? He says, without incident. Charlotte is in school, safe, and he’s going to pick her up to go riding. Laura is sure she’s thrilled, and he says, Lulu agreed to 50/50 custody. He appreciates whatever Laura said to her. She says he can thank his daughter. She ran away when she thought she’d be separated from him. He says he intended on letting her go for her own good, but he realized to Charlotte, it looked like abandonment, and he was afraid it would have the opposite effect. He was abandoned, and look what happened to him. He doesn’t want that for Charlotte. Laura says she doesn’t either. She persuaded Lulu to compromise for Charlotte’s sake. Don’t make her regret it.

Lulu tells Maxie that she sent Chase to talk to Sasha. Maxie asks if she thinks that will work, and Lulu says she thought anything he would say was an improvement on what they had to offer. It can’t get worse. Maxie says, Sasha is still in love with Michael. She blew up her life, and if she and Chase have a mutual meltdown, this is over.

Chase asks if it’s a bad day, and Sasha asks what he’s doing there. He says Carly came by to say how grateful she was for what they did. She asks if Carly admitted she knew, and he says, not in so many words. As hard as it’s been, Carly appreciates what she called their sacrifice. Sasha admits, she didn’t think it would be this hard, and he says, he didn’t either.

Nina tells Jax, she ran into Sasha. She’s not having a good morning, and Nina felt the need to comfort her. He says it doesn’t surprise him. Did she? She says she tried. She guesses Sasha is good. She dropped in on Deception, and Maxie was drowning in self-doubt, and she had the impulse to build Maxie’s confidence, and Charlotte still needs her. He says she’s like a second mother. She says, her point being, she told him that she didn’t want to go down that rabbit hole and look for her daughter. Denying her feelings didn’t help. He says, it’s not something you get over, and asks if she wants him to help find her child. She says, absolutely not.

In the courtroom, Diane asks what Carly said to Martin, and Carly says she was reminding him of who Michael’s father was. Diane says Carly can’t intimidate him. He’s going to do his level best to goad her, and show the judge how much she despises Nelle. He’s going to paint her as a domineering and controlling woman, who wants to wrest a son from his loving mother. Don’t let him. Martin comes in, and Diane says, underneath that southern charm is a shark ready for blood. Don’t forget. The judge arrives, and the bailiff says, the Honorable Judge Lowe is presiding, Willow asks Michael, where is Nelle? Everyone waits.

Finn says he’s never seen Robert so upset, and Anna says, he and Holly had a unique relationship. They’d fight and make up; she’d leave, and he’d go after her. He’s never stopped loving her. Finn says, that’s why Robert needs her to be alive, and she says she’s afraid he’ll lose himself in this desperate quest to find her. He asks if she thinks there’s a chance, but she says she doesn’t know. There’s always a question. Until her body is discovered, Holly isn’t gone.

Chase tells Sasha, when Michael is granted full custody, everything they did will be worth it. She says she’s been telling herself that, and he says, the truth is, Michael and Willow might never know the part they played, but they did a good thing. She says, he’s coping better than she is, and he asks if she’s kidding him. He could barely get out of bed. The Chief of Detectives called, looking for him. All he can thinks about is Willow’s smile and the sound of her voice. Sasha knows how he feels. She can’t get out of her own head, and now she’s going to relinquish her dream. He tells her, make the dream start happening today. She says, tell Maxie tell she’ll be right out. He leaves and she looks at herself in the mirror.

Laura says, it’s been proven Valentin isn’t a Cassadine, and he asks, what’s her point? She asks if Nikolas and Spencer are free of retribution. He says he’s not a fan of Nikolas, but he has no plans for that. They’re both safe. She says he’s been given a second chance. It’s rare, and right now he can decide who he wants to be. He says he won’t argue with that, and she says she hopes he uses it wisely, and becomes the man he was meant to be. He thanks her, and asks who that is exactly. She says, a man who puts his family first, before money and power. He asks if she thinks he could be that man, and she says, the question is, does he want to be?

Maxie tells Chase, Sasha needs to be at 100%; make that 200%. Is she okay? He says he thinks so, and she says, that doesn’t sound like 300%. He says he explained what matters, and she says it’s hard to believe he’s the same guy she thought he was; Lulu was right. Sasha comes out, and says, it’s time to make their dream come true with the face that launched a million sales for Deception. Maxie tells Chase, get out, and tells Sasha that she looks gorgeous. We see the makeup table, and the vial is empty. Brilliant of her to just leave it sitting there.

Nina tells Jax, she appreciates the offer, but she doesn’t need him or anyone else undertaking a journey that should be hers. If her daughter is out there, she’ll sure as hell find her herself.

On the phone in the hallway, Martin tells Nelle that he can’t stall any longer. Get here now. He goes back in, and thanks the judge, assuring him Nelle will be there soon, and sends her deepest apologies. Diane tells Michael and Willow not to get ahead of themselves. Michael asks what the best case is if Nelle doesn’t show, and she says, the judge already has the arguments. He could decide to rule in Michael’s favor if Nelle doesn’t show soon. Judge Lowe asks if Martin’s client is in the courthouse, and Martin says he’s sure she is. The judge says he has a busy calendar, and they’ve waited long enough.

Nelle dashes into the courtroom, wearing a wedding dress, and carrying a bouquet. She says she’s sorry she’s late. The most incredible thing happened. She shows everyone her ring.

On Monday, TJ tells Molly that they have to work on their life, Nelle introduces her new husband, Cyrus meets Ava, and Jordan tells Sonny to stay out of her investigation.

The Real Housewives of New York

Leah meets Dorinda, Sonja, and LuAnn, at a bench in the park. Elsewhere in the park, Sonja and Ramona meet for a walk. Tinsley goes to boxing training with instructor Mike. He asks how Tinsley is, and she says, good, but not great. He says, that’s better than last time, and we flash back to Tinsley weeping and overwhelmed, saying she wants to live her best life. She  tells him that she’s in a better place, and she’s single now. In her interview, she says, Mike isn’t easy to talk to. He forces her to fight with her fists and her words. She tells him there’s tension with Dorinda over nothing. Dorinda is saying Tinsley isn’t being open. Mike asks, where do they get these names from? In Tinsley’s interview, she says she doesn’t know where to go with Dorinda. She wants it to be pleasant, but Dorinda likes to fight. Mike asks if they had a fight, and what happened.

Dorinda tells LuAnn and Leah that she’s done with Tinsley. Tinsley is like a mint in her mouth; gone. In Leah’s interview, she says for someone Dorinda isn’t interested in, she spends a lot of time talking about Tinsley.

Tinsley tells Mike, they all jump in, and she can’t say anything. He tells her, he’s Dorito, and they’re going to box. Ha-ha! Loving Mike. He punches at Tinsley, and she cringes. He tells her, take it like a doormat. He asks why she’s unhappy, and she says she’s not. He wonders if that’s why she was crying the last time she was there, and she says she’s confused. She tells Mike, she’s done.

LuAnn tells Dorinda that Tinsley has an overbearing mother from the South, and she needs to be accepted for who she is.

Ramona tells Sonja, Dorinda is hard on Tinsley. She thinks something is going on with Dorinda, and Sonja suggests she’s jealous. In Sonja’s interview, she says, Tinsley is taken care of, and Rich took care of Dorinda. She misses that life. Ramona says, they’re all devoid of partners now, and Dorinda misses the past. Sonja says, when John tries to help Dorinda, she tells him she’s got this. It’s a different relationship, and her time with Richard was cut short. In Ramona’s interview, she says comparing Richard and John is like comparing apples and oranges. Richard graduated from Harvard, and she doesn’t know if John even graduated from anywhere.

Mike tells Tinsley that she has a down face. What’s the antidote? WTF does she want to do? Tinsley says she doesn’t know, but he says she’s known all along. She’s a legend. There will never be another Tinsdale. She says there isn’t one to begin with. Her name is Tinsley. I don’t think she gets his humor. She certainly doesn’t get that you have to hit back in boxing.

LuAnn visits Leah’s apartment. In Leah’s interview, she says she and LuAnn have shared similar obstacles, and are kindred spirits. LuAnn says she brought her food. She’s starving and thought Leah might be hungry. In LuAnn’s interview, a producer asks what she thinks of Leah’s apartment, and LuAnn asks if they really want to know, and laughs. She tells Leah, it’s really cool. Leah shows LuAnn around, and says, since Kier is only there half the time, she took all the closets. In her interview, LuAnn adds that she loves how humble Leah is. In Leah’s interview, she says, most people are impressed, unless they’re in the 1%. She’s not, and there’s no shame in that. It’s not about the size, it’s about the vibe. She says she heard LuAnn drank at the comedy show, and LuAnn says she thought it was water, and she was thirsty, but it was vodka. She took two sips or three, and went on stage. She was okay, but she never had a big problem. Except for falling into a bush on a crazy girls trip. We flash back to the gift that keeps on giving. LuAnn says she feels if she wants a drink at this point, she can. Leah says that’s how she feels too. For years, she didn’t drink because she’d been told it was death in a bottle, but she doesn’t believe it. She’s been in hell when she wasn’t drinking, with being over-medicated and in toxic relationships. In Leah’s interview, she says, you’re told you have no control, and it’s not empowering; it’s bullsh*t. It’s just a drink. What’s it going to do? We flash back to a naked Leah flinging tiki torches around, and yelling at Sonja. Leah tells LuAnn, she was in a different place when she stopped, and she’s done a lot of work on herself. LuAnn says she has to give herself a break. She’s been listening to herself, and it feels nice to give herself permission to say what she wants. She has a sense of control. In her interview, LuAnn says she lives moment by moment, and in that moment, she wanted vodka. It’s not a big deal. She’s taken off the life jacket, and she’s getting in the pool with the ladies. I used to work for Al-Anon, and I keep thinking of their pamphlet, A Merry-go-round Named Denial. LuAnn asks if Leah saw the Page Six article about Dorinda.

Sonja sees Dorinda on a bench in the park, and asks about the article. Dorinda brings it up on her phone, and it says she’s taking a break from long time boyfriend John. Dorinda wonders if Ramona planted it. In her interview, Dorinda says break-ups are terrible, but she had to do what was best for herself. Her expectation levels have grown, and she needs to find the right partner whose willing to be engaged that way. She tells Sonja there was no fight, but John feels bad because they love each other. She just feels like she’s grown so fast.

The article makes the rounds. LuAnn tells Leah, Dorinda needed John; he was there to pick up the pieces, and helped her at a bad time. She has nothing against him, but Dorinda feels like she’s outgrown him. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, it’s weird to find out about it on Page Six. In Leah’s interview, she says she knows more about Richard than she does about John. What does that say? In Sonya’s interview, she says, now Dorinda is single like the rest of them. In Ramona’s interview, she says she knew before Dorinda did. She’s not surprised. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, them finding out on Page Six, after Dorinda made such a big deal about sharing things makes her a hypocrite. Sonja tells Dorinda that they need to take care of themselves. Dorinda says she needs a house cat rather than one where, when the door opens, he dashes out. LuAnn thinks they need to do something to take Dorinda’s mind off of the breakup. She knows an apple picking place. In her interview, LuAnn says they need to take full advantage of the breakup, and forget the city for a day. She tells Leah that she needs a bigger coffee table.

The women get in a luxury van, and Ramona she’s excited for the trip. LuAnn says, it’s an orchard. They’re going to have lunch by the pumpkin patch, and there’s a corn maze, pumpkin picking, a hayride, and they’ll have a winery tasting later. There’s also a store that sells pies and apple cider donuts. It’s a perfect day for it. Ramona says, it’s gorgeous. In Sonya’s interview, she says she’s excited to be with the girls. She’s not excited to drink more wine though. She just wants to have a healthy day.

The van arrives at Weed Orchards and Winery. Tinsley says, it’s never too early for wine. It’s called breakfast wine, and it’s normal. Funny. I’ve never heard of it. Dorinda gets excited about the petting zoo. Ramona says only Tinsley would wear heels to an orchard. Dorinda brings out a glass that’s almost as big as she is, and says they’re just going to have one glass. In her interview, Sonja says she wasn’t of the mindset to drink, but she’s with her girls, so hell to the no. She’s not missing out. They have lunch, and Ramona toasts to good girlfriends. I’m guessing those girlfriends must be on some other show. Sonja takes pictures, and Ramona asks Dorinda what’s going on with John. Dorinda says she’s not the person that John met; she’s changed. Ramona says Dorinda was broken when they met. Dorinda says it’s been a good process. It made her reevaluate things. In her interview, she says, going through the process with the house flooding, and making the decision about John, she was able to mourn Richard for the first time. Hannah is out of the house, and she’s decided to be alone for the first time, and she’s okay with it. She tells the women, it’s not easy to open herself up to criticism, and Tinsley mumbles, it’s called sharing. In her interview, she calls bullsh*t. Tinsley tells Dorinda that saying she might get judged makes her a hypocrite, and Dorinda tells Tinsley, don’t comment. She has gum that’s lasted longer than Tinsley’s relationships. She calls Tinsley invisible, and in Ramona’s interview, she says, Dorinda has outbursts of anger, but her anger at Tinsley is the worst. Elyse wants them to say something nice about each other. In her interview, Ramona thinks Dorinda is using Tinsley as a punching bag to be so vicious, but she’s glad, since she doesn’t want it to happen to her. Nice. Dorinda makes fun of Tinsley crying, and Tinsley says Dorinda sounds like a bully and mean. In Leah’s interview, she says, if this is Dorinda when she’s not interested in Tinsley, what does Dorinda being interested in Tinsley look like? She tells Dorinda, they should be holding each other up, not bringing each other down, but Dorinda says she can’t deal with dumbness. I guess she can’t deal with a dictionary either, since I assume she means stupidity and not being mute. Tinsley says Dorinda is a bully, and Dorinda says, don’t be judging her. Tinsley says she doesn’t judge Dorinda, and Ramona tells Tinsley, calm down. Tinsley, who has moved into screeching, says, let her finish. Dorinda sarcastically says she’s scared, and asks LuAnn to protect her. Sonja asks why Tinsley is getting in on the conversation, because she’s probably too drunk already to understand what’s going on outside of the world in her head. Tinsley says, for someone who doesn’t care about her, Dorinda says a lot of sh*t about her. She doesn’t like being ganged up on. She leaves the table, and LuAnn follows. She tells Tinsley not to cry. She’s been there, and don’t let them see you cry. Tinsley says she can’t say anything without Dorinda saying something.

Elyse thinks Dorinda is grieving, and Dorinda tells Elyse to stop analyzing her. She’s not mean or unkind. Um… In Elyse’s interview, she says she’s not analyzing Dorinda; she’s frightened of Dorinda. You don’t have to be a psychologist to see she’s mean. Tinsley tells LuAnn that she’s suffered, and if she’s yelling, it’s because she’s upset. LuAnn says Dorinda has a lot of anger toward Tinsley, but she doesn’t know why. Dorinda tells Leah that Tinsley should just be compassionate, and talk to her some other time. She knew she was triggering Dorinda, saying she was being a bitch. If Tinsley wants a bitch, she’s got one. In Leah’s interview, she says, the group, especially Dorinda, is hard on Tinsley for not being forthcoming, but she can understand why Tinsley would mutter under her breath. Leah says they all have kids, which is something Tinsley wants. Dorinda says she buried a husband – like we don’t already know – and she wanted to die. Leah says she got a family, and was loved. Dorinda says, it was a terrible day, and starts to cry. Leah sits next to her, and says she and Tinsley have nothing in common; she gets it. Dorinda wails that she came to the realization that she’s 55, and this is not what she planned. Honey, I’ve got news for you, most of our lives aren’t what we planned. She says she did everything right. She’s a good mother, and not dishonest, and this is what she gets. In her interview, Leah says she has the utmost sympathy, but what does that have to do with Tinsley? Dorinda says she almost became an alcoholic (almost became?), and realized she didn’t like who she saw in the mirror. Leah says she likes Dorinda because she’s real. LuAnn says they’re going on a hayride if it kills them.

Tinsley talks to herself as she changes into sneakers, and says every time she tries, she’s squashed, and has to sit in the corner. Dorinda says, it’s the best time she’s ever had, and talks to the goats. Now I’m confused. Tinsley tells Leah that she wants to climb a tree. She wonders if they’re allowed, and Leah says, who cares? No one will know. Tinsley asks if climbing trees solves problems, and Leah says, it does. In her interview, Leah says, she’d rather be smoking trees, but the Weed Orchard is apparently just an orchard. Tinsley climbs up, and says she can see the world. In her interview, she says she’s mad at herself for letting Dorinda get to her, and getting breaking down crying mad. She let Dorinda rile her up. LuAnn comes along, and says they need to find the girls for the hayride.

They sit in the wagon, and after they get going, Sonja demands to go faster. LuAnn says this was just a way to get them off the lunch table; they’re going to a corn maze. Dorinda says she doesn’t need a maze. In Ramona’s interview, she says, who needs to get more lost? When they get there, Sonja confuses eggplants for pot plants. She tries chatting up the owner, but he’s not having it. Elyse, Ramona, and Dorinda head into the maze, and a woman who works there says they’re going the wrong way. LuAnn asks, which way is the right one? and goes in with Tinsley, Sonja, and Leah. Sonja shucks some corn, and puts it in her bag, saying she’s friends with the owner. LuAnn say she doesn’t know where the hell she’s going, and Sonja wonders what the goal is. She says, if they follow LuAnn, they’ll never get out. Sonja squats to pee, and Leah says she’s fertilizing the soil. LuAnn suggests holding it, but Leah says it’s not good for your bladder. LuAnn doesn’t know how good corn shucks are for it either. In her interview, Lean says, there are two Sonja’s. Miss Morgan, who lives on the Upper East Side, hates tattoos, and comes from old money; and turnip Sonja, who she loves. She has the feeling if both Sonjas met, they wouldn’t like each other. Dorinda says, just lose Tinsley. She’d be good as a corn stalk. My God, that woman is obsessed. In Dorinda’s interview, she says the maze is fun, but they can get out any time now. It’s time to get back to the maze of drinks. She and her group find a gazebo, and Dorinda says they’ll wait until they’re rescued.

On the way back, Sonja asks the owner how much money he makes. Dorinda thanks Ramona for listening, and Ramona say Dorinda is in pain. So was Mario. The reason he cheated was because he felt inadequate. In Ramona’s interview, she says, Dorinda needs to focus on herself, not the reason her relationship with John is over. It’s okay to move on. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, endings are painful, but sometimes breakups are good, healthy, and needed. It’s easy to fall back into old habits, and then what? She tells Ramona that John will always have a seat at her dinner table. She never wants someone to say their life was less than because of her (except Tinsley?). She wants them to say their life was better for having met her. Ramona says they blessed each other’s lives, and in her interview, says, it’s something Dorinda needs to work out. She’s suffering.

Back at the main house, the women have some fruit, cheese, and wine. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, when Sonja drinks, she loses it, and becomes a caricature of herself. Ramona says Sonja is needy, and asks when was the last time she had sex? Sonja says she got pounded last night. They discuss d*ck pics, and in LuAnn’s interview, she says she doesn’t like to shop online. She likes to touch and feel things, so d*ck pics don’t do it for her. Tinsley asks why it has to just be about that; what about loving each other? Sonja says Tinsley would do anything for d*ck if it brings her a bracelet. Why Tinsley doesn’t haul off and smack Sonja is beyond me. Elyse says when she’s not in a relationship, she misses being held, and Sonja says they all want sex. LuAnn says, it’s time to go.

Next time, the women take an exercise class and do some Russian banya (it’s like a sauna plus), Ramona says Dorinda has a pattern, and Dorinda gets nasty with Ramona.

👨🏾‍🍳 On Top Chef, everyone was bummed about Kevin leaving, and we flashed back on his moments. The chefs were taken to a summer camp, in the mountains outside of L.A., where Padma welcomed them, and introduced guest judge Kelsey Barnard Clark, who was the Top Chef Kentucky winner. Padma said that being out in nature made her excited for grilling season to begin. In honor of summer, the Quickfire challenge was to make a dish featuring Bush beans, choosing from a variety of options. Kelsey told them, get creative, have fun, and make a delicious meal. The winner would get $10K, courtesy of Bush beans. The chefs had thirty minutes. Lee Anne came out the winner for how she incorporated the beans in her dish, and her chef skills.

Padma told the chefs, they were not alone. A mom’s group was there for a weekend away from their kids, and to act like kids, and they were to send them off with full bellies and an unforgettable experience. The chefs were to work together to create a Sunday brunch buffet for 200 mothers. Another previous winner, Brook Williamson, would also be a guest judge. Kelsey wanted an impressive buffet, and Padma said each of them had to make two dishes. They had four hours to prep and cook for a 9 am meal, using whatever ingredients the camp had. Beforehand, they got to have some downtime with camp activities, like zip lining and bungie jumping.

For the 9 o’clock brunch, the chefs had to get up at 4 am. Lee Anne said she couldn’t sleep, hearing the karaoke going on below. They were a little disappointed in the lack of diversity in the camp pantry. Karen said there wasn’t much diversity and not a lot of ingredients. Melissa said it was straight up Hunger Games.

Bryan, Geoffrey, and Karen had the best dishes, and Karen came out the winner. The least favorite dishes came from Lee Anne, Melissa, and Brian full of Malarkey. Tom said they were at the place in the competition where mental mistakes start to happen. Lee Anne had to pack her knives and go, but she said it wasn’t over, since shed crushed it before in Last Chance Kitchen. That $10K probably wasn’t a bad consolation prize either. In her interview, she said she was moving into the next phase of her career, and life. After being a mom for five years, she was dusting off the cobwebs.

Next time, the chefs cook for Olympic athletes, and (gasp!) a piece of shell is found in the crab.

😵 Sleepwalking…

I’m way tired, since my sick child dog is back from the hospital, and needs a lot of care right now, so I’m saving the tea for tomorrow. The Shahs reunion remains a mystery, and I’m starting to wonder if they ever really existed. So for now, stay safe, stay keeping it real, and stay gold, Ponyboy. Stay gold.

May 8, 2020 – Which Way Did They Go, Today’s GH, Get Well Soon, Tyler’s Royals, Happy 10th, Hello Elijah, Golden Girl, Chef Spat, BH Dish, Nosy Husband, No Charm, Virtual Andy, Quotes of Eight & Could Be Worse


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


Shahs of Sunset

Your guess is as good as mine as to what happened here. Part one of the Reunion was supposed to air at 9 pm, but somehow it turned into The Notebook. I checked everywhere – Bravo’s site, Twitter, Facebook, Google – nothing. I saw the question being posed on the Shahs Facebook page, but no one answered. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I even checked through the entire next week of the digital guide, and nada. Is there a lawsuit pending? As soon as I find out what the blip is going on, I’ll let you know.

It was probably just as well, since I have a sick child dog who had to stay at the hospital tonight, and I’m just a wee bit distracted. I poured an entire pot of tea though, for your entertainment pleasure.

Casey-December14-2013 (3)

My Little Man

🏥 Today, General Hospital’s Flashback Friday was the episode where Jordan and Curtis got married on The Haunted Star. Then found Kiki’s body in their wedding night stateroom. And they still haven’t gone on their honeymoon.

🤕 At Least He Didn’t Lose His Head This Time…

I love Joey Pants! Wishing him a smooth recovery.


👑 Two Degrees Of Royalty…

Along with Josh Altman giving his two cents.


👒 I Can See the Resemblance…

But does she still have that nutcracker?


🏝 Hawaiian (Re)Hash…

No earth shattering revelations.


👶🏽 A Distant Meeting…

GG’s baby Elijah makes his quarantine debut with the cast.


And takes a stroll(er).


💃🏽 Looking Good As Gold…

TBH, I kind of forgot about her.


🍽 Dinnerware Debate…

If you’re back is to the rack, you’re under attack.


💋 Joanna Explains It Not At All…

I never heard someone use so many words to say they weren’t talking about something. Note to Joanna: I can’t comment on that is sufficient.


👉 Stay Out Of Women’s Business…

But if it’s a reality show, and the reality is, Denise’s husband wants to get involved with her issues, what’s the problem?



🍹 Methinks He’s Thirsty…

I barely remember this dude, and if he hadn’t brought it up, I wouldn’t have remembered this incident at all.


🖥 Virtual Reality…

Andy dishes on the VPR reunion.


🦥 Pandemics Make Strange Bedfellows…

It’s bigger than the Teddy Bear’s Picnic.


🗿 Quotes of the Week

Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.Theodore Roosevelt

Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it. – Groucho Marx

The struggle you’re in today is developing the strength you need tomorrow. – Robert Tew

It’s a baby, not a weedwhacker. – Danny (Gary Valentine), King of Queens, when Doug wants to borrow his baby.

Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. – Margaret Mead

It is easier to change a man’s religion than to change his diet.Margaret Mead

We are continually faced with great opportunities which are brilliantly disguised as unsolvable problems. – Margaret Mead

There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.Maya Angelou

🍾 Everybody’s Not Working For the Weekend…

I hope you’re making the most of any new free time you have, and changing it up on the weekend. Remember…


May 7, 2020 – The Plan Is In Motion, the Curse Is Lifted, Warring Restaurants, Beverly Hills Drama, Breaking the Wall, a Surprise For Jax, Tucci’s Negroni, Happy Dog & Loaf’s Light


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

You guessed it. I missed the beginning. Why break a streak? There was mostly a lot of backtracking. The only new news was, Laura and Carly meet at the MetroCourt, and Finn runs into Willow at the hospital.

Laura says she knows Carly is busy, and the Nurses Ball is just around the corner. Carly says, Michael’s custody case is tomorrow. She’s done everything she can to strengthen it, and hopes it’s enough.

Trina sees Portia at the hospital, and Portia asks how the movie was. Trina says the movie was fine, but the four of them being together was awesome. Portia wonders why she’s back. She thought Josslyn’s driver would take Trina home. Trina says they offered, but she wanted to drive back with Portia. Doesn’t that make her a thoughtful daughter? Portia says, it does, unless she’s worried about not being safe. Then it makes her anxious.

Jason and Sonny meet Curtis at the pier. Sonny says they were giving Cyrus room to let TJ go, and Curtis says, all eyes are on Jordan now. Sonny asks how TJ is, and Curtis says, good; he’s back at work. Jason asks how TJ’s memory about the kidnapping is, and Curtis flashes back to TJ telling him and Jordan about being abducted, and telling Chase that he didn’t get a good look at them. Curtis tells Jason and Sonny, it’s sketchy, and Sonny says, that’s a good thing. The less TJ remembers, the safer he is from Cyrus.

Mac shows up at Jordan’s office, and says he’s been working non-stop on TJ’s kidnapping. Jordan says she appreciates it, and asks how it’s going. Mac flashes back to TJ telling him about how he heard a train, the basement was damp, and he also thought there was construction in the area. Mac says he spoke to TJ this morning, and TJ remembered a few more details. He’s hoping to piece it together, and narrow down the area. She asks if he’s had any luck, and he says he’s getting closer. There are still a lot of questions, and he’s hoping she can point him toward the answers.

Laura says, Nelle is dangerous, isn’t she? and Carly says, she’s a relentless nightmare. Carly flashes back to confronting Nelle about pretending she slept with Sonny; Nelle causing Carly to think she was being haunted by Morgan; and Nelle telling Carly she has 5% of the ELQ shares, and a room at the Quartermaines, and saying, Carly doesn’t know what she can do to blow Carly’s entire world apart. Carly remembers Nelle saying Michael was abusive, that she’s never going to see her grandchild, and Carly’s mom is going to lose her license. She flashes back to Nelle telling her about how they met when Nelle was a child, and Carly trying to get her to do the right thing, but Nelle saying she’s going to bankrupt the hospital, and it’s all Carly’s fault. Laura says, it’s not just Michael that Nelle wants to bring down. She’s filed a lawsuit against GH. Carly says, Nelle did that to force Michael into giving her custody; it’s just collateral damage. Laura says she doesn’t think the hospital’s insurance is going to cover it. They see Cyrus at the bar, and Carly says, you’ve got to be kidding her. Laura can’t believe he’d have the nerve to set foot in Carly’s establishment. Carly says, if it were up to her, he’d still be in Pentenville.

Curtis says, from what he can tell, the police department found nothing that links Cyrus to TJ, although Mac is getting closer. Sonny says, it doesn’t surprise him. It’s a high-profile case, and Mac is the Chief of Detectives. Curtis says, Mac is making it his personal mission to find out. We flash back to Mac telling Jordan where he thinks TJ was held, and suggesting they get surveillance footage from the bodega on the corner. Curtis says, if he finds out… Jason says, it will put TJ and Jordan in danger. Sonny asks where Jordan is, and Curtis says, she’s not coming. She doesn’t even know the meeting is happening. Sonny asks, why not? and Curtis says he’s not sure Jordan is ready to talk about what needs to happen next, but he sure as hell is.

Jordan asks what Mac is thinking, and Mac says he doesn’t understand why Jordan was sent text messages that seemed to be from TJ. We flash back to Jordan getting the messages, and Curtis saying that TJ is just taking some space. Mac wonders, why go through the trouble of convincing her that TJ is safe?

Finn tells Willow that he knows his brother hurt her. There’s no excuse, but it took courage for him to face her, and own up to what he did. She says he sounds proud, but he says, after what Chase did, he wouldn’t blame her if she never wanted to see him again, but he did talk to her and explain. She says she saw him when she went to get her things. She knows he’s sorry. She is too, but that doesn’t change anything. Sasha comes out of the elevator, holding a bloody towel to her nose, and Michael is with her. He looks sheepishly at Willow.

Laura tells Carly, Nelle is claiming the head of the hospital and a senior staff member conspired to give Wiley surgery without permission. We flash back to Nelle saying she didn’t sign the form, and everyone else saying she did. Laura says, charges like that aren’t covered by insurance. If the hospital did have to pay, along with all the negative press that would come with it, she’s not sure GH would survive. Cyrus approaches their table, and says, it does sound dire.

Mac wonders, why no ransom? Why did they want Jordan to think TJ was just letting off steam? Jordan says she’s wondered herself. Maybe they were biding their time. He says, for what? She wishes she knew. TJ didn’t hear them talking, so unless he remembered… We flash back to TJ saying he was chloroformed before he could identify anyone. (I just thought, what about the dude with the Kentucky ringtone? Didn’t TJ interact with him? Why didn’t Mac ask for a description?) Mac says nothing like that has happened, and she says, it sounds like he has a theory. Lay it on her.

Curtis says, the less he knows about Sonny’s methods, the better. Jordan is the Police Commissioner, and can’t be near what happens next. Once she threw Taggert and the others under the bus, and Cyrus’s sentence was vacated, they were supposed to handle him. It’s how Sonny maintains peace and protects his loved ones. Sonny says, it is, and Curtis says, with all due respect, what’s taking so long?

Portia says she knows Trina is still processing everything. It takes time, but constantly worrying about her isn’t going to help. Trina says she just wants to spend extra time together. Portia asks if Trina is sure it’s not because she doesn’t want to be home alone, and Trina admits she’s right. She says she’d rather wait with Portia. Portia says, it’s okay. What happened to Trina’s father was the exception, not the rule. The police department keeps the town safe. Trina asks how she can say that. Jordan is the Commissioner, and threw her dad under the bus. We flash back to Jordan telling Trina about the undercover operative, and Taggert tampering with evidence to make sure Cyrus was found guilty. Trina asks Portia how she can trust anything that has to do with Jordan?

Carly tells Cyrus, they were having a private conversation. He says he didn’t mean to interrupt, and Laura says, and yet he has. He says, after decades of hearing almost nothing but male voices, forgive him for being drawn to the siren song of female conversation. He’s sorry; however… Laura says, an apology followed by a however, and he says, the future of General Hospital is a matter that concerns everyone in Port Charles. Laura says, she’ll keep everyone posted, and he says, knowing her steady hand is at the reins remediates his concern. Carly asks if she missed the part where he told her what he wanted, and Cyrus sits down. He says he wanted to know her and Sonny’s address, so he can invite them to his housewarming party. They’ve been so gracious in welcoming him, he’d like to return the gesture.

Jason understands Curtis’s concern, but they have to move carefully, and not rush in. They both know that if they force it, things can go sideways, and who knows how it will play out. Curtis says he has a family now, and all he can think about are Trina and Cameron, and how one bullet was all that was separating them from life and death. He flashes back to pulling Trina out of the warehouse, and says, he hears Trina calling out for the father he couldn’t save. Sonny says, it couldn’t happen at a worse time for all of them. Curtis says, Stella told him what’s going on with Sonny’s father, and Sonny says Curtis knows he wants to neutralize Cyrus as much as he does. He’s trying to solve the problem, and doing everything he can. Curtis has his word. The plan is already in motion.

Mac tells Jordan, without a ransom demand, the kidnappers weren’t motivated by financial gain. The only other reason would be to gain leverage, but the only person connected to TJ with power and influence is Jordan. She says, TJ was returned, and he asks if any demands were made. Jordan flashes back to meeting with Cyrus in prison, Harmony’s subsequent visit with Cyrus’s instructions, and finally admitting to Sonny what’s going on. She remembers Sonny saying she told him Cyrus came to Port Charles for personal reasons, and that means her. She tells Mac, nothing. He tells her that he’s grateful for the job. He appreciates her trusting him, and has come to think of her as a friend, as well as a boss. Jordan says, the feeling is mutual, and he says if she ever wants to talk, about the job or anything else, he’s there.

Willow asks, what happened? and Sasha says she just has a bloody nose. Finn says he’ll have a look, and takes her into an examining room. Willow asks if Michael wants to talk about it. He says he and Brook ran into Chase and Sasha at the boxing gym. Tempers flared, and Brook accidentally punched Sasha. We flash back to Brook accusing Sasha of being too shallow to see Michael for who he is, and saying she could have been sitting pretty, then punching her. Willow asks, if Chase was there, why didn’t he drive Sasha?

Carly tells Cyrus, it’s thoughtful of him to include them, but they have a lot going on. Their plate is full, and their calendar is booked. He says, what a pity. He’d like to send one anyway, in case the day opens up. She says he can send it there or the coffee warehouse; he knows that address. We flash back to the ambush at the warehouse, and he says, why would he? She says, it’s a business address. She’s sure it’s as easy to find as a pub in Brooklyn. He says now she’s making him hungry for a pastrami sandwich. He can’t remember the last time he had one. Do they serve them there? She says, no; they don’t. He sighs, and says he hopes Laura’s schedule is a bit more accommodating. Laura says, the city is going through a major crimewave, and he says, tragic stuff. He hopes she gets a handle on it soon. She says, in the meantime, it’s keeping her busy, so she’ll have to pass. He says, it’s a shame. He was hoping the both of them could attend; or rather, all three of them. He doesn’t know if Sonny told Carly – he knows Sonny doesn’t like to burden her with the details of coffee importing – but he and Sonny reached an understanding. Laura says, about what? and he says, a conflict of interest, but it’s all cleared up. He’s planning on making a memorable debut in Port Charles. Laura says, he’s a memorable guy, and he says, likewise; they both are. They can expect invitations. He certainly knows where Laura lives. Carly says, it’s a matter of public record, but he makes it sound ominous. He says, it’s unintentional. He starts to leave, and says he’ll put them both on his Christmas card list. Laura tells Carly, raincheck? and Carly says, absolutely.

Curtis asks what he needs to do, and Jason says, keep doing what he’s doing; keep living his life. Curtis says, maintaining cover, and Jason says, the best thing to do is put on a normal front. What they have in mind takes time. Curtis says, how much time? and Sonny says, it depends. Jason says, if they attack now, while Cyrus is parading around town acting like the wronged party, it could draw unwanted attention. Sonny says, it’s the last thing they need. Curtis says, so he’s waiting for better optics? Sonny says, he and Cyrus reached a truce. Curtis says, which means? Sonny says, they dig in and play nice, until they find the right moment to act. Curtis flashes back to Jordan wondering if she should confess. He says while Sonny tries to thread a very narrow needle, Jordan is stuck on a tightrope.

Jordan says she appreciates Mac’s loyalty and friendship. He’s glad to hear it, and she says there’s nothing about the kidnapping she’s not telling him. He hopes she’s not offended, and she says she knows how it looks from his end, and that he had to ask. She’s glad to have the right man on the case, and has every confidence that he’ll get to the bottom of the kidnapping. Mac says he’ll stay on it until he does.

Curtis goes to Jordan’s office. She says, it’s good to see him, and kisses him. He asks if she thinks she can drop everything and join him for a late dinner. She says she was wrapping things up, but she wants to check on TJ at the hospital. He asks if everything is okay, and she says, it’s fine, but it will be better once she sees him. They leave, and Mac watches.

Finn checks Sasha’s nose, and says, good news; it’s not broken. She’ll want to put ice on it to keep the swelling down. She says, so much for the new face of Deception. They haven’t even launched yet. She’s glad the paparazzi weren’t there to see it. She knows Chase told Finn, and he knows everything. Finn says he wanted Chase to walk away from a well-intentioned disaster before it got worse. He flashes back to telling Chase, it’s not fair to Willow that her next decision is based on a lie; fix it. He tells Sasha, for what it’s worth, he thinks they should both come clean. She says, then what? Everyone is happy? He says, that sounds better than what they’re doing now. She says, it would be for her and Chase, but Michael and Willow will never be happy if Nelle gets Wiley.

Portia says she doesn’t like it any more than Trina does, but Trina’s father trusted Jordan. Trina says, clearly, he shouldn’t have, but Portia says, it’s not their call. Even if they don’t know the reason, that should count for something. Trina says, maybe. She’ll get back to Portia on that. Portia says they can agree Trina’s father would want her to move forward, and focus on her future, not his past. Trina says he wanted to watch her grow up. Now he doesn’t get what he wants. It’s not fair. Portia hugs her, and says she knows.

Sonny goes the MetroCourt, and Carly says he just missed Cyrus. He asks if there were any problems, and she says Cyrus was pretending to be nice, and denying he was a threat. Sonny asks what she means, and she says Cyrus wanted their address, so he could invite them to his house warming. She told him that he already had it, since he tried to gun them down. Then he invited Laura, making it clear that he knew her address. Sonny says he’s there now, and she asks, how much longer is Port Charles going to have to endure this guy? 

Portia asks if Trina feels better, and Trina says, a little bit. Because she has a great mom, not because she despises Jordan any less. Portia says, Jordan’s not the enemy. Trina says, no, she isn’t. He is. Cyrus walks toward them, and Trina stomps up to him. She says she knows who he is, and he says he’s so sorry to hear about her father’s death. She tells him that he doesn’t sound sorry. He sounds like someone who needs to be stopped. He says, it’s a misunderstanding. Curtis and Jordan arrive, and Curtis tells Cyrus, back off. Stay the hell away from her.

Finn tells Sasha, there will be some bruising, but no scar. She thanks him, and says she knows he’s worried about her and Chase, but they know what they’re doing. He tells her, if she says so. He noticed how she looked at Michael. She says she wasn’t looking any kind of way at him, and Finn says, she loves Michael, and Chase loves Willow. Is the best solution really to play God with everyone’s life?

Michael tells Willow that he wasn’t going to make Sasha call a Ride Share. Chase was reading Brook the riot act, so he drove her. It’s hard, turning off the feelings. She says she knows. Tomorrow is Wiley’s custody hearing, and they have to be ready. He says, they will be.

Carly asks Sonny, remember the time they got married so she couldn’t testify against him? He says, which one? and she says, either one. Is there anything she needs to know? He says, for now it’s best… and she says, to wait until she needs to know. She wants him to promise her he’s going to end it, and he says he promises. She asks, when? and he flashes back to making Cyrus an offer. Sonny tells him, he can live there, but he can’t move his merchandise through Sonny’s territory. Cyrus says, they have a deal, and they shake hands. Afterward, he tells Jason, they’re buying time. When Cyrus stops looking at him out of the corner of his eye, they’ll take him out. He tells Carly, sooner than their friend Cyrus thinks.

Mac sees Laura, and asks if she’s looking for the Commissioner. Laura asks if she’s in, and he says they both missed her. He has some things for her to sign, but it can wait until morning; closed cases. Can he help her? She says, not unless he can get rid of Cyrus for her.

Cyrus says he doesn’t believe he and Curtis have been introduced. Curtis says Cyrus knows damn well who he is. He’s Jordan’s husband. And he knows who Cyrus is; he knows everything about him. Play his game somewhere else, and stay away from Trina and Portia. Understand?

On Monday, Nelle is prepared to make Julian a generous offer, Chase wonders who will help Brook if her father doesn’t, Finn asks someone to meet him at The Rib, and Willow asks Michael if he can marry a women who will probably never be in love with him. The digital guide lists tomorrow’s show as the one from November 27, 2018.

The Real Housewives of New York City

LuAnn goes to Tavern on the Green to meet Jacques, who is still pretty cute. In her interview, LuAnn says they were together for four and a half years. She’d just gotten divorced and her kids were teenagers. We flash back to that time, and she says they have a healthy relationship, and check in with each other. Now he’s engaged, and she’s happy that he’s happy. She tells Jacques that her probation is over, and it feels good to move forward. It’s been two years. He asks, what’s next? and she says she’s taking it day by day. She’s with the girls a lot, and they like to drink, but she promised herself that she’s not going to right now. She hasn’t decided either way, but she’s wondering if can have wine with dinner. (Yep. It’s always wine with dinner.) Jacques says, he thinks a glass of red wine is fine, if she can manage to have one. She says, not two? And he says, one. One or none. He’s not worried though, and says, whatever she decides will be the plan and she’ll follow it. In LuAnn’s interview, she says having his support makes her happy. He knows her well, and he’ll have her back no matter what she decides. She recently got involved with a podcast called Chanel in the City, and she’s co-hosting an event featuring comedy. Jacques recently started doing stand-up. She’s researching material for Marry-F***-Kill, and asked him to make a guest appearance. She tells him that she’s performing Feeling Jovani at the event, and he says he hasn’t heard it. She plays it on her phone, and he asks who Jovani is. She says, that’s the best question ever.

Dorinda gazes at her and Richard’s old townhouse. In her interview, she says, today, she’s visiting old haunts. The townhouse was a special place for her and Richard. He carried her over the threshold. They had a huge garden, lots of wonderful dinners, and hosted parties. Everyone who was anyone walked through their doors. It was a beautiful, growing, loving time for them. She goes to Nello, and maître d Jon, greets her. She points out the ring she’s wearing, and says Richard gave it to her there on their five-year anniversary. The restaurant is where they always celebrated. In Ramona’s interview, she says, Dorinda has been dredging up a lot, and talking about Richard non-stop. Sonja, Ramona, and Elyse join Dorinda. Sonja pulls a shaker out of her purse, and says she’s on liquids, since she broke a zipper putting on her dress at the fashion show. In Sonja’s interview, she says she does an occasional detox of all liquids. Day three is always the worst. Dorinda says Sonja’s show was incredible, and she loved how Sonja diffused things with Leah. In her interview, Sonja says, Leah doesn’t wear the same kind of sparkly numbers the other girls do. She thought Leah would like the cashmere twin-set. She does. That’s why it has her name on it. She says, it couldn’t be worse. They’re eating this gorgeous food, while she’s eating this putrid-looking soup. Dorinda says she and Leah had a great talk. Leah is an interesting person. We see a clip of the two of them, hanging out at a bar and talking. She says Leah is very open. If she’s asked a question, she’ll answer it. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she feels like Leah has access to Tinsley in a different way. She wants to go to lunch with the two of them, and thinks maybe Leah can provide Tinsley with a comfort level or a connection, and maybe bring them back together. Ramona asks, who’s going to LuAnn’s thing? Elyse asks if LuAnn is drinking, and Ramona says, she’s taking it day by day. Elyse says, so she’s not committed to it long term? and Ramona thinks that would be setting herself up for failure. In Ramona’s interview, she says, if LuAnn wants to drink again, it’s her choice. She’s a big girl, and a responsible woman. As long as she’s not out of control, Ramona is supportive. Dorinda points out that Elyse only ate half her pasta. That’s why she’s a size zero, and Dorinda is a six. She’s a full-figured lady. Since when is a six full-figured? And while I’m on the subject, since when would a six fit Dorinda?

Tinsley and Dale go out to lunch. In Tinsley’s interview, she says her mom loves to come to town. Seeing the babies (Tinsley’s dogs) is a new excuse. They’re Dale’s grandchildren. Who knows if she’ll have any others. She thanks Dale for taking care of the dogs while she was gone. Dale says she loves them, but they’re a lot of work. Boy, don’t I know about that. Tinsley says she and Bruce are done. In her interview, she says that they broke up, and it was a mature ending. They don’t hate each other; they’re just done. Dale says she never even met him. She can’t imagine Tinsley living in Chicago, and Tinsley says she thinks that was part of the attraction. Bruce was a Chicago guy. In her interview, Tinsley says she thinks she just wanted to be in Chicago, but she doesn’t know. She tells Dale that Bruce couldn’t make time in his life for her, and Dale says, his life is set, and he doesn’t need any complications. He probably decided it was too much for him. She asks how Tinsley feels, walking the runway after all those years. Tinsley says she loved it, and Dale says when she’s on stage, she’s happy. Tinsley says, it makes ger irritated with the girls that she is younger, but she’s done a lot, and it’s never acknowledged. No way is she letting them gang up on her again. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she’s not letting them walk on her again. Particularly Dorinda. Dale says, the only thing that worries her is the issue of a baby. She’s afraid Tinsley is going to miss out if she dies before that happens. She’d like to croak after the baby is born. Tinsley says she can’t croak before. She promised to help Tinsley take care of it.

Sonja goes to Englewood, New Jersey, where the office for her brands is. She meets with VP Laura, and CEO Gaurav. She tells Laura that she’s annoyed that her clothes don’t fit. In Sonja’s interview, she says, she and Gaurav been in business many years, and just had a fantastic show. HE needs to show her the money. Gaurav says they have a very select customer, and Sonja says that’s why they’re expanding their base. She knows they lost money up front; that’s the business. She asks if they got sales from the show, and he says, no. She says, what the hell? In her interview, she says she knows there were losses up front, but seeing it on paper makes it real. There is a future. That’s why they’re working hard to make a profit. She tells Gaurav, she thinks Century 21 will be good exposure. In Sonja’s interview, she says, they sell online, but she recently got a call from Century 21, and they want to buy her collection. She wants to see what they have to say.

Leah talks to Rob. In her interview, she says, they never married, and she’s upset that he never proposed. It took a long time, but they made a point of being best friends, and being there for their daughter. Even though they live in separate houses, two blocks away. She tells him that Kier said he likes someone, but he says, no; he was talking about someone he worked with. She says they need to date people; this isn’t normal. He says he’s done, and she asks if he isn’t lonely. She is. She wants passion and romance. In Leah’s interview, she says she thinks they should date more, and show as parents that they can maintain a healthy relationship. She wonders if they’re going to be single forever. She tells Rob, her mom still isn’t talking to her, and in her interview, explains that when she decided to drink, her mom stopped speaking to her. She tells him that her mother won’t be happy until she’s in church, repenting. She did that once, and the priest hit on her, and asked how many partners she’d had. Obviously, she lied about the number.

LuAnn goes club Slate, which has a giant slide from the third to first level. LuAnn meets with podcast host Chanel, and says she loves the room. In LuAnn’s interview, she says Chanel asked her to be on the podcast, and they’re hosting a comedy event to benefit Stomp Out Bullying and Fortune Society, that helps people get their lives back after incarceration. Jacques arrives, and LuAnn says he’s going steal the show. In her interview, she says Jacques is engaged to a lovely lady, and has her stamp of approval. LuAnn wants to introduce Jacques by saying she wants to set the record straight; she never screwed the pirate. Jacques doesn’t think it’s funny, and she says if she’d done it, she’d be defensive, not joking about it.

Leah picks up Ramona, who says, it’s weird being back in the city. She wants to get in the fall swing of things. Now that she’s settled in more, she feels good. Leah says she texted her mom that she wanted to stop fighting – life is too short – but she got no response. Ramona says she told Leah, go in person. The only way to maybe come to terms is to go there physically. In Leah’s interview, she says, the nine years she didn’t drink helped, and now her parents are closer. When her mom is disapproving, it takes her back to her teen years. Ramona tells her, mothers deserve respect, even if they’re not always right. Leah says she shouldn’t be judged by her failures, but her achievements, and starts to cry.  Ramona says Leah’s mother is afraid Leah will fail again; she’s scared. In her interview, Leah says that Ramona and her mom are complete opposites, but having Ramona’s attention in a maternal way is comforting. Ramona says, people hide behind texts. She asks what Leah’s mom’s favorite flower is. Leah says, lilacs, and they’re also her favorite. Ramona says they’re her mother’s favorite too. She tells Leah to bring her mother a bouquet, and say she’s sorry she disappointed her. Leah says they need comedy now.

In her interview, Ramona says podcasts are gaining popularity, but she doesn’t have time for them. Dorinda suggests that she, Leah, and Tinsley have lunch together. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she doesn’t like the idea. She doesn’t need someone else there. In Leah’s interview, she says, Dorinda thinks she would be a great mediator, but Tinsley’s not batsh*t crazy. Her being the voice of reason is scary. Jacques asks if Ramona has ever bullied anyone, and we flash back to several of the many times she has. She says she doesn’t think so, and he asks Dorinda, who says, no. We flash back to ditto. Dorinda says she used to fight the bullies who picked on other kids. Sonja says she’s glad she and Leah talked it out. In Leah’s interview, she says maybe she misread things, and Sonja wasn’t doing some weird shady sh*t, but she doesn’t think so. It’s not a big deal though. Sonja sent her a pair of pajamas. She can get over it. Dorinda says she doesn’t think LuAnn is an alcoholic. Tom literally drove her to drink. In Dorinda’s interview, she says LuAnn always says, it’s not about Tom, but it was. It was fast and furious, and stressful, beyond LuAnn’s control. She turned to the tipple. LuAnn says she needs some water, and picks up a glass. Ramona tells her, it’s all vodka, but she takes a sip anyway. Then takes another. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, it tastes so good. Dorinda says, it’s over; let the curse be lifted. In Ramona’s interview, she says, it was bound to happen. All she had was a sip. Dorinda says, it’s a big moment. No one is judging or cares. In her interview, LuAnn says, to be able to take a sip of vodka and not get arrested is huge. She doesn’t have to make excuses; she’s a grown woman. She’s ready. Elyse asks if she isn’t in AA, and Dorinda says Elyse isn’t the judge and jury. Elyse says she’s not, but if you’re in AA, you want to resist. Dorinda tells her to mind her own garden. In Elyse’s interview, she says she knows Dorinda and LuAnn are drinking buddies, but LuAnn just got out of AA and off probation. If LuAnn was her buddy, she’d be pulling the drink out of her hand.

LuAnn is introduced, and says she’s proud to be part of the organization. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, there’s so much going on, she doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Were you bullied, in jail, or are you part of the comedy act? LuAnn reads an entry from her journal, and jokes about it. In her interview, Dorinda says she’s proud of everyone that tries. LuAnn makes her pirate joke, and introduces Jacques, who takes the stage. He says he was bulled as immigrant because of his name, which people pronounced Jackass. Sonja says, he could be funny, but she can’t understand him. Dorinda wishes  there was a bouncing ball of interpretation. Jacques says he’s sorry to interrupt Sonja, who insists she’s listening. It’s just these cackling bitches. In her interview, she says, maybe in France he’s hilarious. Ramona decides she’s bored and gets up. In Sonja’s interview, she says she usually has the pulse of the room, and there’s no pulse here. She can’t eat, can’t drink, and it’s not funny. She leaves with Ramona, and they go to the bathroom. LuAnn sings Money Can’t Buy You Class, and the crowd joins in. Elyse says Ramona dances like Elaine on Seinfeld.

Sonja tells Dorinda, she’s not drinking, and LuAnn is. In her interview, Sonja says, the last thing she wants is LuAnn drinking – without her. Tinsley goes down the slide, and Leah follows. Ramona thinks it’s the funniest part of the night. Tinsley says she wants to work on herself, and she’s not ready to be set up. She wants to be single for a little bit. Ramona is proud Tinsley made the decision to end something, and is taking charge of her life. She tends to stay to the bitter end. Dorinda goes down the slide, then LuAnn, and Sonja nearly slams into her. Dorinda tells Leah that Tinsley seems apprehensive about the lunch, and Leah says Dorinda is a little intimidating. Dorinda tells Tinsley that Leah said Tinsley is intimidated by her, and in Leah’s interview, she says, Dorinda and tequila, no Bueno. Ramona asks if she’s scary, and Leah says, not really. In her interview, Dorinda says, of course Tinsley is intimidated by her. She’s intimidated by a butterfly. Tinsley says she doesn’t need Leah to have lunch with Dorinda, and Dorinda says she thought it would be nice for her. Leah has positive access to Tinsley in a different way. Tinsley says she doesn’t need other people to help solve her issues. Dorinda says, everything she does is no good. Sonja says, here we go again. Tinsley says she’s sick of people talking for her, and Sonja can’t believe that they’re fighting at an anti-bullying event.

LuAnn plays ping-pong with Ramona. Dorinda tells Tinsley, she came with good intentions. She’s leaving because she’s starting to get mad. In Leah’s interview, she says, Dorinda and Tinsley are so stuck, they don’t need a mediator; they need a miracle. Tinsley says, way to make it work.

Next time, Dorinda thinks Ramona is behind a Page Six item about her, Dorinda tells Tinsley that her gum lasts longer than Tinsley’s relationships, the women go to an orchard where there’s a hayride, a corn maze, and a winery tasting.

🔪 On Top Chef, Gregory and Kevin were going to have their concepts come to life, and drew knives as to who would pick someone first for their team. Kevin got the first choice. His team consisted of Bryan, Melissa, and Karen, all Restaurant Wars winners. Gregory’s team included Brian full of Malarkey, Lee Anne, and Stephanie, Lee Anne described the team as a bunch of wild cards. Gregory wanted his diners to feel like they’d been whisked away to the Caribbean, while Kevin wanted to present a style of country cooking not usually found outside of people’s homes. Gregory said it best in his interview, by telling us, it was quite an undertaking in the timeframe they had.

The chefs had 48 hours to plan, and no restrictions. They began by planning their menu, setting up their kitchen, and selecting the décor. The winning team would split $40K, and get a subscription to Open Table stockware to help run their restaurants.

While buying dinnerware, Kevin nearly had a fistfight with Lee Anne and Brian full of Malarkey when he’d put down some plates only to have them end up with the other team. Lee Anne swore they had no idea Kevin was saving the plates, and Karen diffused the situation, talking Kevin down. While part of the teams began cooking, the rest set up the restaurants. Kevin hit another snag when his curry brand wasn’t available. He was concerned that it was going to be struggle to get out his twelve dishes. Karen felt she was spread too thin, and not dedicating enough time to both the front and back of the house.

Karen explained to the diners that Country Captain was family style, and really a feast. Melissa felt there was too much on the menu, and it was overwhelming for all of them. The first set of diners ran late, causing the next group to have to wait. Brian full of Malarkey did the front of the house for Kann, but Lee Anne felt he wasn’t absorbing the original plan.

The judges said both teams had conveyed the mood board, there was a lot of good food, and all in all, they did an awesome job. Kann was the winner, having a well-designed menu that was cohesive. Kevin was clearly disappointed. Tom told Gregory that he didn’t try to chef it up, and stayed true to what he’d said it would be. He said it made him want to go to Haiti, and Gregory had expressed what the island was about in ten dishes.

Gail said Kevin had taken on a lot, and he said he could have made last minute changes, but didn’t think that would have been in the spirit of Top Chef. I have no idea what he meant by that, and got the vibe that the judges didn’t either, and thought it was an odd excuse. The judges felt there were too many dishes, but Kevin said, although some editing might have been in order, his grandmother would have thought the chef should give everything they can, and then give the guest more. Tom said, the mushrooms were just bad, and Karen whined that she didn’t have the help she was promised. Tom asked why Kevin thought he shouldn’t be sent home, and Kevin said he was raised to own his mistakes, and couldn’t live with himself if he threw anyone under the bus. In the end, any mistake rested on his shoulders. That being said, he was told to pack his knives and go. Or at least move on to Last Chance Kitchen. In his interview, he said it was important to do the right thing, and the captain went down with the ship. He admired captains who did that when they could have jumped into a lifeboat.

Coming up, summer camp, a dinner for athletes, Brian full of Malarkey feels betrayed and maybe walks, and the finale in Europe.

🎭 Garcelle Explains the Drama…

She might be a newbie, but she’s not afraid to jump into the thick of it.


🥤 It Wasn’t Exactly a First…

Teresa broke the fourth wall too, when she threw the Solo cup at the camera.


🕶 Poor Jax…

Maybe he should have broken out those sunglasses he stole in Hawaii.


🍸 Bartending With Stanley…

One of my favorite actors gives a lesson in mixology.


🐶 Raising the Woof…

Does he know it’s him? Does it matter?


🤷🏽‍♀️ TGIWhatever…

Friday may not have the same meaning for everyone right now, but it’s still Friday. Stay strong, stay following the guidelines, and stay knowing what day it is. Or at least the month.

April 30, 2020 – Carly Figures It Out, NYC Wives Do Fashion Week, the Restaurants Are Chosen, Camp Please No & Wild


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

In keeping with this week’s tradition, I missed the beginning, which wasn’t much. Sonny wants to talk to the family, Julian told Brook to get out of his bar, and Nelle harassed Michael in the park.

Michael tells Nelle, they’re done here, but she says, they’re just getting started.

Sasha sees Carly headed toward her, and says, before she says anything… Carly says she already talked to Michael, and being Michael, he blames himself. But she blames Sasha. She wants Sasha to tell her, in her own words, why she cheated on Michael.

Josslyn asks Sonny if it’s about Mike, but he says his dad is the same. It’s about the situation keeping them there. They can leave the house now. Josslyn asks if they can go back to school, and he says they can. Dev says, it’s amazing news, and Sonny tells Brando that he’s free to go back to Chicago.

At the hospital, Elizabeth asks how Trina is, and Trina says, pretty good, considering. Elizabeth says if there’s anything she can do, just call. Trina thanks her, and Elizabeth tells Cameron that she’s going back to work. Call if he needs her. Cameron flashes back to being on Sonny’s terrace with Trina, and kissing her. Trina says, hey.

At the reception desk, Elizabeth asks if Portia saw Trina, and Portia says Trina was doing her homework there earlier. Elizabeth wishes Cameron was as good with that, and Portia says she’d love to ask Elizabeth’s opinion. It’s about the hospital, so if Elizabeth isn’t comfortable, she’ll understand. Elizabeth says, try her, and Portia says she’s thinking about putting her name in for the head of internal medicine. She knows she’s new, but since Elizabeth has been there a while, she wants her opinion. Would she be stepping on any toes, or inviting pushback or resentment, or both?

Julian tells Brook, turn around, and stay out of his bar. She asks, why the hostility? and he says, maybe because she blackmailed him. She asks if he’s admitting he knew all along the baby was Michael’s.

Michael tells Nelle, his relationship with Sasha – she says, or lack thereof – has nothing to do with her. She says, it doesn’t reflect well on his commitment, or his ability to provide a stable home. She’s willing to compromise though. Instead of being at each other’s throats with a custody hearing, she’s willing to strike a deal. She gets full custody. Of course (🍷) he’ll have visitation. She’s thinking one weekend a month and alternate holidays. In return, grandmas one and two can keep their robust bank accounts and their jobs.

Chase tells Willow, he’s sorry. She says she’s sorry too, for her part in making this happen, but it’s too painful; she can’t go there yet. Someday, her time with him will be happy memories, but this is how life is right now, and she can’t imagine that day. She has no more room in her heart to hurt, and the best way for him to apologize, is to just not. She goes into the bedroom.

Sasha says she knows Carly is furious, but she thinks what happened should stay between her and Michael. Carly says, it’s not just them; there’s Chase. She believed Sasha when Sasha said she loved Michael and would never hurt him like Nelle did. She believed Sasha’s lies and deceit were behind her. Help her understand what changed. Sasha says, it’s not all that complicated, but Carly doubts that. Sasha says, Chase was feeling like things with Willow were happening too fast, and she felt that way too, in a way. She didn’t count on an insta-family with Michael and Wiley. She realized she’d never be enough. Michael needs someone better, more pure. Diane confirmed that she’s a bad choice as far as the custody suit goes. She and Chase were frustrated, and one thing led to another… Carly says, no. She’s lying.

Cameron asks Trina if the Spanish test wasn’t difficult, and she says, no. He asks if she didn’t take the test, but she says, no; she can’t do this. They barely see each other outside of school, and all he can come up with to talk about is that he thought the Spanish test was hard? He’s totally been avoiding her. He says he hasn’t. He’s been busy with school and soccer. She says, like every day of his life. The only thing that’s changed is that they kissed. She suggests they talk about it, and says it can never happen again.

Josslyn says Cameron was going to the hospital after school, and Trina goes there to do her homework sometimes, so she’s probably there. Dev asks if they should text first, but she wants it to be a surprise. Sonny says, they still can’t take public transportation, and one of the bodyguards will drive them. Josslyn and Dev leave, and Brando says Sonny made their day. Sonny says, they seem happy. What about him? Brando says, it’s a great relief that no one is in danger, especially the kids. Sonny appreciates what Brando has done for him and his family. If he needs help reestablishing himself, all he has to do is ask. Brando thanks him, but he was wondering if he has the option to stay.

Brook says Julian is so busted. He was so busy covering his tracks with Brad, he didn’t count on his own son being in the car. He put Lucas in a coma. Julian says he did nothing of the sort. Her theory is pure delusion. She asks if that’s all he’s got. He’s been hiding Michael’s son from him, and Willow has been jumping through fiery hoops for a baby that’s not her own. Did he think Lucas would be grateful? The cherry on top is the accident. Julian tried to kill Brad, but ended up hurting Lucas. He’s in so deep, but not to worry. One word from her to Sonny or Michael, and all his problems will be solved permanently.

Nelle bets Michael didn’t think she had it in her to be fair. He says she wants him to stop fighting for Wiley’s custody, and if he does, she’ll drop the bogus charges against Monica and Bobbie. She says correct, although she has an issue with the bogus part. He says, it’s not going to happen. There’s nothing she can prove, and even if she could, and shuttered the doors of GH, it wouldn’t matter. Monica and Bobbie would happily walk away from their careers rather than let her raise Wiley. She’s bad for Wiley, and he doesn’t trust her with his son. She says, their son, and he says, not when he’s done. She says he thinks he’s better than her, and he says he has to be. Wiley deserves better, and he’s going to have it. She says he’ll be sorry, and the worst part is, it didn’t need to be this way.

Sasha gets why Carly would think she’s lying, and Carly says, none of this tracks. Sasha told her that she thought Michael marrying Willow would improve his chances for custody, and now she says she and Chase have been having an affair the whole time? Sasha says she felt guilty about it, and Carly says, she didn’t sleep with Chase. She just wants Michael to think she did.

Willow tells Chase, she’s sure she forgot some things. If he finds them, just put them aside. He asks if she’s sure she’s okay, and I yell, tell her, you idiot, as Willow leaves. She cries in the hallway, and Chase leans against the door.

Sonny says he had no idea Brando wanted to stay. Brando realizes it seems like he’s doing a 180, and guesses he is. In the beginning, he just wanted out, and to go back to Chicago and his life, but that wasn’t an option. He needed to stay put and play the part of Dev’s dad. He likes Port Charles. Sonny says, it’s a great city, and Brando says, he likes running his own garage. He’s not demanding it be rent free, and if the deal is over, no harm, no foul. But if he can stay and pay rent, keep the garage going, it’s something he’d like to explore.

Elizabeth tells Portia, she’s not comfortable speaking for the doctors, but she’ll speak for the nurses. Even though Portia has only been there a short period, she’s totally earned their respect. Everyone is raving about her. Portia is glad to hear that, and Elizabeth says Portia knows what she’s doing. She’s sure other people will be vying for the position, but she hasn’t heard of any yet. Her vote is, go for it.

Trina tells Cameron, they’re going to get it all out there. She really likes him so much; he’s an awesome friend. She’s so grateful he was with her in the car and at the warehouse. She would have lost her mind without him. He says he would have too. She says she’s researched PTSD, and it messes with you emotions. That’s what happened to them. They almost died, and they went through it together. They’re scrambled, but fine. It’s not fine to make something of it that it’s not. Nothing has changed. He says, it hasn’t? and she says he’s as into Josslyn as he ever was. Josslyn is still getting over Oscar, but she’s close to getting to the other side. It’s only a matter of time before she realizes she’s into him. The worst Cameron can do is convince himself that he’s into Trina when he’s not, and blow his chances. Cameron says, so they’re good? and she says, totally good. He says, wow. She’s the best. She says, duh.

Brook tells Julian, he can relax. She has no interest sharing his secret with Sonny or anyone. The last thing she wants to do is blow up Lucas’s life more than it is already. Julian’s dirty little secret is safe. Dustin comes up behind her, and asks what secret that would be?

Chase sits in the dark, and looks at his phone. He remembers telling Willow that he has to shower, and her saying she’ll risk it, and kissing him.

Carly says, Michael couldn’t bring himself to marry Willow; he didn’t want to hurt Sasha. So she found a way to let him off the hook. She tells Sasha not to confirm it, or she’ll be obligated to tell Michael that she sacrificed her own happiness for him and Wiley. She’s have to tell him that Sasha knows Wiley is the most important thing, and has to be kept away from Nelle. She would probably do the same thing in Sasha’s position, and admires a woman who can do that. Sasha says nothing, and leaves.

Michael says he can’t believe it. Dammit! He picks up a big stick, and hits a tree with it. Willow yells his name, and asks, what’s wrong? What’s going on? He says he ran into Nelle, and gave her exactly what she wanted.

Sonny tells Brando, it’s up to him. Sonny was under the impression Brando couldn’t wait to get out, but if that’s not the case, he can stay. Brando says, cool. He didn’t know if it would mess things up. Sonny says, it works out for him. It’s more convincing for Dev, having Brando around. He doesn’t want Brando to feel obligated now that the danger has passed. Brando says he appreciates being given a choice.

Cameron tells Trina, she’s 100% correct. Trina says, tell her something she doesn’t know, and he says, except for him being into Josslyn. She says, that’s why they were going to the winter formal in the first place; so he could dance with Josslyn. He says he likes her, but it’s not a big deal. If she never feels same way, they’ll just be friends. Trina says, shut up, and he says he wants to tell her how great she is. Hug time. He grabs Trina, and she says she can’t breathe. Josslyn arrives with Dev, and asks, who’s ready for a movie? Did they interrupt something?

Brooks says, Dusty! He made it just in time. He says, what’s the dirty little secret? and Julian says, Brook is exaggerating. Brook says, there’s no use hiding it. She needs to tell Dustin the truth. She and Julian aren’t related, but they have a lot of people in common. Like Lucas. She didn’t know Julian was his biological father until after Julian propositioned her. He thought she was a hooker. Julian says offered to pay for her time; nothing else. Brook says, if she mentioned it to Lucas, it would make things awkward. Out of the goodness of her heart, she hasn’t, but it wouldn’t hurt if Julian was nicer to her.

Chase flashes back to telling Willow that wine guy is a legend, and saying, she’s not going to leave him for wine guy, is she? She says, that depends on if he’s still making her rock climb. He says, it’s at the Y; he’s not asking her to climb Everest. She says, it’s kind of the same thing. In the present, there’s a knock at the door, and Chase jumps up to answer, but it’s Sasha. She asks if she can come in, and he says, sure. She says she wanted to check on him. How’s he doing? Is he waiting for Willow to come back? He says, she’s definitely not coming back.

Michael tells Willow, Nelle agreed to drop the lawsuit… Willow says, in exchange for full custody. Bobbie and Monica would give up their careers and go bankrupt before letting that happen. He says that’s what he told Nelle. She said a bunch of BS, and he lost it. He knows not to do that. What if Nelle was recording it? She drives him crazy. He tells himself, don’t engage, but he couldn’t help it. She made him so furious. Willow says, good for him.

Dustin thinks he and Brook will have the song done in time for the Nurses Ball. She says he didn’t apologize for being late. He says, it was five minutes, and she says she was early. He says he couldn’t let his students out before the bell rang, and she says she can’t get over the fact her artistic Dusty is a high school teacher. He says her artistic Dusty has bills to pay. Not everyone gets to be a Quartermaine. She says, touché, and he says, besides, he’s passionate about teaching, like she is about her music. She suggests they get back to it.

Brando says he understood the situation, and was fine with helping Dev out; he’s a good kid. And he’s not the type to turn his back on someone in trouble. Sonny says, he made that clear, and Brando says, he didn’t like being told how live, and not having a say. He screwed up in the past, but he’s taken control of his life, and has been responsible for his own choices. Having said that, Sonny gave him the opportunity to do something good in Port Charles, and he doesn’t want to waste it.

Trina tells Josslyn, she was telling Cameron that he’s a complete idiot who made a complete mess of his life, but he’s lucky he has smart friends. Josslyn asks what Cameron did now, and Cameron says he was late to practice. The coach was mad, and he’s the one who has to write Cameron a recommendation letter. Trina says she told Cameron it would be okay; he could make it up. She asks how Josslyn and Dev are there, and Dev says, house arrest is officially lifted. Josslyn says they still have to be careful. Sonny’s guys are driving them, but they’re free. Cameron says, good. They can hang out somewhere other than Josslyn’s house. Josslyn says she’s dying to go to the movies, and Trina asks what she wants to see. Josslyn doesn’t care, and Cameron says, not a chick flick. Dev wonders what that is, and Trina says they’re romantic comedies that Cameron secretly loves. Josslyn says, he does, and he knows it.

Nelle goes to the MetroCourt, and Carly asks if there’s something she can do for her. Nelle says she ran into Michael, and Carly says, how was that? Nelle says, terrible. He was abusive and threatening, and she fully intends to tell her lawyer. She was willing to compromise, but Michael refused. As much as she was hoping to avoid all out warfare and being combative, the court is going to hear all about it.

Chase gives Sasha a glass of water. She asks if he’s waiting for Willow, and he says he’s waiting for the sense that he did the right thing. To sense the rightness that will make losing Willow bearable. That should be the reward for doing the far better thing; the pain and loss should get less. He keeps telling himself that, but right now all he can think about is the future he’d started to dream of that will never come true.

Willow says, it’s not like Michael had a meltdown in court, but be real. Nelle is an evil psycho, and it doesn’t matter if he freaks out. If he plays along, she’s hateful, but if he fights her, she’s still hateful. She’s glad he yelled at Nelle, and wishes she’d been there. She would have yelled too, for everything Nelle has done to Michael, Wiley, and her. If not for Nelle and her walking horror show, Willow wouldn’t have flipped out; she wouldn’t have driven Chase into Sasha’s arms. She wouldn’t have had to get her clothes from an apartment where she was the happiest she’s ever been. She hates that she’s doing this now. It doesn’t matter what happened to her, or how sad she is, or how she wishes things were different. The only thing that matters is Wiley. Michael says, she’s right. Nelle is the worst. He suggests she give the tree a whack. She says she’s not hitting a tree, but he says he did, and it made him feel better. Give it a try. She takes the stick, and says, okay. She hits it and laughs. He says, imagine it’s Nelle; give it a good whack. She hits it harder, and keeps hitting it. She says, I hate you Nelle.

Sonny tells Brando, he’s welcome to stay. He’s family, and it’s good to have him. Plus, Sonny owes him. Brando says, he doesn’t, but Sonny says he saved Carly, and stepped up for Dev. He knows Brando didn’t think he had a choice, and responsibility and free will are important to him. Brando says, it was a unique situation, and Sonny says, now that it’s over, Brando’s life is back in his hands. What he does about it, whatever he decides, Sonny will respect it. Brando thanks him, and says he’s not sure he was truly grateful before, but he is now. They shake hands.

Portia tells Elizabeth, she pulled the trigger. She’s officially in the running for head of internal medicine. Elizabeth says, good for her, and good luck. Portia appreciates it, and thinks Elizabeth for her support.

Taking Trina aside, Josslyn says, Cameron seems happy, and Trina says, he does. Josslyn wonders why, but she’s sure they’ll be able to figure it out. Trina says, let’s go, and Josslyn says Trina seems happier too. Trina thinks she is. She feels like things are still really horrible, but maybe they’re looking up. Josslyn tells Cameron and Dev, the chick flick awaits. Cameron says, no, and Josslyn says she thinks he’s protesting too much. They walk out together, all happy.

Carly asks if Nelle has a recording or footage of said abusive behavior, but Nelle says, no. Doesn’t Carly care that the son she raised is treating her this way? Carly says, not really, and Nelle says she’ll never see her grandchild again, and Carly’s mom is going to lose her license because Michael refused to be flexible. Carly says they’ll wait and see, and Nelle asks if she thinks Michael is going to win, and Carly says she doesn’t know who’s going to win. Who can predict that? But she can tell Nelle, she has a good feeling about it.

Sasha tells Chase, she’s waiting for that too; the feeling of, yes, it was worth it. Do her a favor. Whichever one of them it happens to first, let the other one know. If it makes him feel any better, Carly completely figured it out. Carly thinks they’re doing the right thing. So does she. Chase says he knows they are. If he didn’t, he couldn’t do it. Sasha asks if he has anything stronger, and he goes to the kitchen.

Willow says Michael is right. She does feel better, but what if someone saw? He says, no one is around. Better to hit the tree than Nelle. She says, that depends on who you ask. Michael says he’s sorry for all the havoc this insanity has caused in her life, but she says she doesn’t regret any of it. He asks how that’s possible, and she says, in whatever crazy Nelle responsible way Wiley is in her life, she can never be sorry for that. She can’t stand the thought that Nelle might win. Michael says, she won’t, and she asks how he knows. He says, because they won’t let her.

On Monday, Ava asks Nikolas if he wants a divorce, Franco says he can never escape his past, Neil attacks Julian, and Brando tells Jason that he’s staying.

The Real Housewives of New York City

It’s the start of Fashion Week, and Sonja gets her new collection together. Tinsley practices her walk, as Garo Sparo (winner, Project Runway) asked her close out his show. She gets to wear a crown, and she says, it’s the most exciting thing ever. LuAnn meets with her producer Ben. Her new show theme is Marry F*** Kill. She says, it’s always been about the Countess, but now the Countess is being naughty. She’s excited about the new show.

In her interview, Ramona says, if you don’t go to a show during Fashion Week, you’re considered a leper (yeah, I know), so she has to go, or she’ll be ostracized. Sonja says she’s been working all summer on her new collection of ready-to-wear; everything is under $250. She confers with her team, and asks about the models. In her interview, she says Fashion Week is a big hurdle, and she doesn’t want to mess it up. The girls are coming, as well as her designer friends, and it’s nerve wracking. She thinks team Sonja forgets the reason for the show is the retailers wanting to buy her collection. She swears she’s not sleeping until the show is over.

Tinsley squeals when sees the dress she’s wearing, and says, it’s so her. It is. Very fairy princessy. Dale is happy that Tinsley is back doing something. It’s been ten years. Dale dabs at her eyes, and Tinsley says she doesn’t want to cry; she’ll ruin her makeup. She says she looks like herself again, and they both cry without crying. Dale asks what wrong with them? and Tinsley says, a lot. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she was the It girl, and walked in shows. This makes her feel like she’s back to being the person she was before, and lost when moved away.

Dorinda and Sonja get out of the limo, checking their girdles and tape respectively. Tinsley is thrilled with her cute, cute dress, but not so much the sparkly sneakers. In her interview, she says most people walk the runway in heels, but she’s afraid she might trip in the sneakers. She definitely wouldn’t in heels. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, Tinsley loves a Disney themed fashion show. Maybe she’ll get her happily ever after. Ramona says they’re not her kind of clothes, but she appreciates the spectacle. Amanda Lepore takes a turn on the runway. Leah says she used to read Vogue all the time, and it’s what Tinsley was made to do; what she does best, back where she was in her heyday. Almost. In Sonja’s interview, she says Tinsley hasn’t had that spark recently, and it’s back. Garo says Tinsley turned it out, and everyone congratulates her. LuAnn says she’s back.

Backstage, LuAnn asks for a curling iron, accosting Lioc, who’s there for the models, but styles LuAnn’s hair. In her interview, LuAnn says she had to run home and change, and didn’t have time to do her hair. She used to be a model, so why not? Outside, John takes photos of Dorinda and the other woman. Ramona hogs the spotlight, insisting on posing with designer Pamela Roland, and literally pushing the people who were with her out of the way. Sonja tells LuAnn the show wasn’t for her age group, and LuAnn says the clothes were more in the not-in-her-taste group. Ramona bitches about how Tinsley left things at her Hamptons house. She tells Tinsley that she was upset by the way she left the room; she trashed it. There were soda cans and water bottles everywhere, and she stained Ramona’s duvet cover. In Tinsley’s interview, she says they’re not talking percale sheets. Ramona got them at Bed, Bath & Beyond. She’ll get Ramona a new one. She tells Ramona that she’s sorry; she’ll pay for it. They sit, but Leah isn’t there, which Ramona says is not cool. In Ramona’s interview, she says they have a great location for the fashion show. It’s a coveted thing to be in the front row. Sonja leaves messages for people about the models. She says she realized her staff wasn’t doing what she thought they were. In her interview, Ramona says she’s totally embarrassed. They’re in the front row, and Sonja should know better. It takes months of preparation for a three minute show. Can’t she put the phone away for three minutes? Sonja says she’s physically there, but mentally, she’s worried about her own show. In Dorinda’s interview, she thinks the Roland show made Sonja panic. She’s not as organized as she thought.

The women go to a restaurant. Ramona thinks she’s going to order oysters, and in her interview, Dorinda says, Ramona eating oysters is like watching a porn flick. And she guards them like Neptune’s treasure. LuAnn says Sonja was on her phone the whole time. Sonja, who’s still on her phone, says she has model fittings tomorrow. Ramona asks why that wasn’t done last week, and Sonja says, it’s the people she hired. Ramona suggests she let an intern do the work, and Sonja says, she has to negotiate prices. Nothing is free unless she gets it. She goes to sit on the side by herself, and Leah arrives. She says she needed a moment. She had a mental… not breakdown, a breakthrough. Ramona says it was rude not to show up. It was a coveted invite. Leah says her dad called, and said mother doesn’t want talk to her. Leah starts crying, and says, after a nine year period of not drinking, she decided to do it, and her mom is worried. Ramona wonders why Leah told her. In Leah’s interview, she says she texted her mom that she drank, and it’s not the end of the world. Her mom didn’t respond to her texts afterward, so she called her dad, and he said her mom is mad at her. Ramona says she’s afraid Leah will go to that deep dark place, and LuAnn asks how Leah feels about it. Leah says she has no regrets. She was in a good environment, and didn’t put herself in danger. The hangover sucks, but she thinks her mother is overreacting. LuAnn thinks talking to her wasn’t helpful. In her interview, Leah says her drinking is a trigger for her mom. She still views Leah as a wild teenager. It’s hard to accept she’s a thirty-seven year old who’s got their sh*t together. Ramona says she shouldn’t do things like that by text, but Leah says she’s a millennial. In Ramona’s interview, she says, a text is for, what time should I be there? or, I’m running late, not for this. Dorinda says she doesn’t tell her mother anything, and LuAnn says she keeps her mom in the dark. Tinsley says her mom wants the best for her, but gives her a list of what to do specifically. Like she didn’t want Tinsley’s hair curled for the show, and they got in an argument. In her interview, Leah say she wishes their argument was about the way she wears her hair, but she’s talking big life sh*t. Tinsley says she doesn’t need everyone’s advice. She can make her own decisions. Dorinda pantomimes taking out her brain. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she’s trying to be a compassionate human while listening to the argument about straight versus curly hair, but Mother Teresa couldn’t tolerate this. Ramona’s oysters come, and Dorinda asks if she only ordered for herself. Ramona says she asked if anyone wanted anything. Dorinda only listens when she wants to, because she’s more interested in hearing herself talk.

Leah meets with her Married to the Mob publicist Sloan. She says streetwear wasn’t even a term when she started. She paved the way, and fifteen years later, she’s still doing it. She wanted to wear men’s clothing lines, and thought she couldn’t be the only woman who didn’t like cutesy streetwear, so she made her own. She also hated having a boss, and got fired from every job. Sloan say she put herself in the middle of a man’s world. In Leah’s interview, she says, her type of feminism is to do whatever the boys do, but do it better. Her ex and baby daddy Rob arrives, and in her interview, she says, it’s hard for people to understand their relationship. It’s so unique. They’re basically an amazing married couple who don’t live in the same house or have sex. She tells him everything is all good, but he doesn’t think her drinking is a good idea. She asks if he thinks she’d do anything to put the life she’s worked hard for in jeopardy. He says drinking puts her on a self-destructive path. In Leah’s interview, she says Rob and her mom are like her two rocks in life. They’re both questioning her, and her mom isn’t talking to her. It’s upsetting. Rob says, it’s her prerogative, but if it starts affecting… She says they’re on the same page. He says her mother is their only helper, and they have to give her the respect she deserves. Leah gets weepy, and says she can’t believe they’re still not in a place of understanding. She’s never felt any approval from her mother, only judgement. Rob says, that’s what parents do.  

Dorinda meets with stylist Luke. In her interview, she says Sonja sent everyone a couple of options, and she was lucky enough to get a Liza Minelli-esque jacket. She tells Luke. John never misses the opportunity to make bad decisions. He doesn’t think sometimes. In her interview, she says he knows she doesn’t like some of his lifestyle choices. There was a party he wanted to go to, even though she didn’t, and he went without her. We see a clip of that, and she says he disappeared. It doesn’t make her feel good, or have a sense of security and love. Clearly, if he’s not home with her, he’s not happy. Luke says people wondered where she was. It’s a bit of disrespect. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she’s transparent as a person. She’s not worried that John is doing something naughty, but the non-transparency runs deeper. She tells Luke that she thinks the relationship gets stunted. She hasn’t returned his calls for two days.

Sonja’s show is in two hours. She takes a selfie with her team, and thinks she looks like Phyllis Diller, but no one knows who that is. She’s unhappy with the floral arrangements, and in her interview, she says, fashion people are coming. They need gorgeous flowers. Stems would be better. This is an embarrassment. She calls LuAnn, who’s in San Diego. She already had a show booked in California this month. Sonja shows LuAnn the flower disaster, and has to go. In her interview, Sonja suggests everybody pull their heads out of their asses and figure out what’s going on. She yells at everyone, and says she doesn’t want them to think or ask anything.

Leah picks up Tinsley. Tinsley remarks that Leah isn’t wearing anything Sonja, and asks if Sonja didn’t send anything to her. She sent three different dresses over to Tinsley that she loved. What she’s wearing is really pretty; a mini dress with a nude underlay, and white knit flowers on top. Leah takes what looks like a sweat suit out of a bag, and shows Tinsley, saying, that’s not athleisure. It was all she sent, along with a hat. In Leah’s interview, she says she’s pretty sure Sonja is trying to send a message. We flash back to Leah screaming, 1985 is over. She tells Tinsley, there are also these, and puts on a pair of sunglasses. She asks where the crack pipe is, since only someone high on crack would wear this. In her interview, Tinsley says she doesn’t think Sonja is capable of purposely making Leah look stupid. She probably thought it would look cool.

Ramona says she doesn’t understand what Sonja is doing, since it’s not a designer, and the clothes are already made. Sonja yells at more people, and in her interview, she says, don’t let them see you sweat, but right now, she doesn’t care what they see. The guests come first. It’s to say thank you to their supporters and get good press. John surprises Dorinda, and in her interview, she says she didn’t know he was coming. If she’s not at a party, she doesn’t see him. There’s a disconnect that she can’t get her head around, and he doesn’t even seem to acknowledge it. Tinsley and Leah come in. Leah’s dress has a print of Lil’ Kim on it, who she says is her feminist icon. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she had a skirt with Chairman Mao on it. She gets the vibe that’s going on. It’s a gangstery thing. Ramona isn’t wearing Sonja either, because it didn’t fit; she couldn’t get it zipped. Leah says, Sonja wanted her to wear pajamas. She shows them the outfit. In Ramona’s interview, she says she wouldn’t wear it either. It’s a sweat outfit; something you walk the dog in. What was Sonja thinking? Dorinda asks what Leah did to deserve that.

In Dorinda’s interview, she says, come on. Sonja knew what she was doing. Dorinda would have cut that sh*t up, midriffed it, put on a great pair of heels, and walked the runway. The show starts. I like Sonja’s pieces. I’ve checked them out before, and they are actually affordable. Backstage, Sonja says the models are fantastic, and the clothes are beautiful and fit well. Every time a model goes by, Dorinda says, Leah could have worn that. Sonja thinks the show will help them continue their relationships with retailers, and says, it all comes together when it’s supposed to. In Leah’s interview, she says she’s in the fashion industry. She’s been going to Fashion Week shows since she was seventeen, when she babysat for the editor (oddly enough) of Seventeen magazine. She knows what a fashion show looks like, and this isn’t a fashion show. Tinsley says, there was no music, and there were no lights.

Sonja asks who it is on Leah’s dress. Beyonce? She asks, what happened to the cashmere two-piece? It’s her signature, and it was in Elle. Dorinda says, the dresses would have looked great on Leah. Leah says she thinks Sonja is full of sh*t, and she’s passive/aggressive. It’s like, she’s the Downtown one. Sonja is still mad at her from the Hamptons. In Sonja’s interview, she says she can’t believe they’re doing this now. It’s her moment. She’s never giving Leah a gift again. Does Leah really think she has to time to be passive/aggressive and think it out? Sonja says she gave it to Leah in a nice bag, and Leah says, it was a paper bag that had been ripped open. Sonja asks where the sunglasses are, but there’s never an answer to this. Hmm… In her interview, Sonja says she didn’t think Leah would like a frilly dress. She’s never seen her in one, and her dresses are kind of fancy. Leah says she tried the sweats on, and she looked crazy. Sonja immediately has a couple of her people help her out of whatever it is she’s wearing, and puts on the sweats. She comes galumphing out, wearing the hat as well, and shakes her groove thing in Leah’s face. Leah says, how can she be mad at Sonja? In her interview, she says, it’s hard to stay mad when Sonja is prancing around looking like a pimp in pajamas.  

Next time, LuAnn meets with Jacques (remember him?), Leah says Dorinda that she’s scary, LuAnn tells her audience that she never hooked up with the pirate, and LuAnn drinks some vodka.

🌮 On Top Chef, Stephanie felt bad, as she was the only Padma’s Angel left. Bryan said, being in the bottom was extremely motivating. I’ll bet. We saw a clip of Last Chance Kitchen, where Karen won, and would be joining them. The Quickfire challenge was a taco throwdown for Danny Trejo (Machete, and a million other things, also one of my favorites). Along with being in films, he also owns Trejo Tacos and a donut shop. They were to make the perfect taco for him, and he told them to be creative. The box was lifted to reveal machetes, the only knife the chefs would be allowed to use. There would be immunity this time, but Padma said, from there on out, it was off the table. Most of the chefs made a fish taco of some kind. I’ve never had a fish taco, which is surprising because I love fish. I don’t know why, but I’m skeptical of them. After all the tacos were tasted, Danny said he’d buy every one of them. The bottom two were Gregory, for excessive saltiness (in his dish, not him), and Eric, whose portion size was skimpy. The chef who had everything Danny wanted in a taco was Stephanie. In her interview, she said she’d been waiting to win… something. Everyone would think she was a badass now, cooking with a machete.

The chefs were reminded that Restaurant Wars would be next week, but the battle was beginning now. The guest judges for the elimination challenge were, restaurateur Kevin Boehm, and Top Chef winner and restaurant owner Stephanie Izard. The challenge was to make it through the pitch, presenting the concept and the menu using a mood board, and making one or two dishes that were an example of the restaurant. They had to pitch and sell their idea, and the two favorites would be the restaurants in the war.

The restaurant concepts were, Kevin, with Country Captain, featuring Southern fare; Eric, with Middle Passage, featuring African cuisine; Gregory, with Kann, featuring Haitian woodfire cooking; Bryan V., with Thatcher and the Rye, he said accessible so much, I had no idea what his concept was supposed to be; Karen, with Three Black Crows, featuring modern dim sum; Lee Anne, with Hanai Mama, featuring Hawaiian food – she also explained that hanai meant adopted. We continued with, Stephanie, who presented Lucy C.’s, featuring modern, elevated comfort food (Lucy was her dog); Brian full of Malarkey presented Baja Asian, a combination that isn’t supposed to be together, but can’t help it (no surprise, his was the most dramatic of the presentations); and finally, Melissa with Sabrina, featuring modern Asian California food. She’d named the restaurant after her grandmother, who saw life in a romantic way. It’s how she wanted her food to be. Gregory pointed out that they had to be both great cooks and great salesmen for the challenge.

At the Judges’ Table, the favorites were Gregory, Kevin, Brian full of Malarkey, and Melissa. The judges said they could picture themselves eating at the restaurant, as well as the restaurant being successful. The big winners were Kevin, with Country Kitchen, and Gregory with Kann. The judges wanted to see their restaurants come to life.

On the downside were Eric, Lee Anne, and Stephanie, which we saw coming. She’d never even envisioned a restaurant for herself. The judges said she had no concept, and Stephanie had to agree. She had no focus. What she did have was immunity, so she was asked to step aside. Tom said Eric’s idea of casual, accessible food, but upscale dishes had a disconnect. The duck was overcooked, and the judges agreed his food fell short. Gail said it was so salty, it drowned out what he was trying to do. Lee Anne was told her concept wasn’t strong enough, and she admitted she hadn’t picked the right things to express it. Padma said they were both good chefs, but it was Eric’s turn to pack his knives and go. In his interview, Eric said he was disappointed in himself, and this taught him a new level of humility. He said he was still a student, and learned, not just from the judges, but everyone around him. He was hoping to redeem himself in Last Chance Kitchen.

Next time, the restaurant concepts come to life. It looks like a lot of chaos.

🏕 The advertisement for Camp Getaway said it was the opposite of adulting. That worries me. And don’t we have that already with Summer House?

🌼 Tra-La It’s May…

You’re here, Friday’s here, spring is springing, get out there if you can. See you later on the Shah side, when the season comes to a close. Except for a one or two episode of the dreaded reunion, where everyone talks at once and old wounds are opened. That Andy Cohen is an evil genius, I tell you. Stay safe, stay ready for anything, and stay (virtually) wild.

April 23, 2020 – How Memories Define Us, Leah Tiki Torches Ramona’s Lawn, the Chefs Conduct Flavor Profiles & Up


What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)


General Hospital

It’s flashback Thursday in Port Charles.

Sonny says he was thinking about how memories define us. We go down Mike Memory Lane; being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, the Nurses Ball when Sonny helped him sing, Mike’s tantrum on Thanksgiving, and Sonny’s decision to move Mike to Turning Woods.

On the phone, Carly says, the Nurses Ball is coming up. She needs the renovations completed, so the attendees can stay over. She expects to hear from them by 5 pm tonight. Cyrus walks in, and says he hopes he’s not interrupting. She says she already told him, they can’t accommodate him. He says he’s meeting someone there, and she suggests they meet somewhere else. Lulu comes in, and thanks him for meeting her. He says he was just explaining to Carly that she invited him to meet there. Lulu says Cyrus is giving an interview to The Invader, and Carly says, next time Lulu wants to interview a drug trafficker, do it somewhere else. Carly walks off, and Cyrus asks if Lulu would prefer another venue, but she says, no. It’s okay. She already reserved a table.

Mac tells Jordan, the hospital security cameras couldn’t get much on the van that dropped off TJ. Officers are canvasing the area to find out if any witnesses noted the license plate. Chase is also coordinating with the detectives in the field. There’s a knock at the door, and Curtis comes in with coffee. Mac says, the department is doing everything in its power to get justice for TJ. He leaves, and Curtis says she didn’t expect Mac not to investigate, did she? She says she never thought it would be so public. She prays TJ doesn’t remember, especially anything connected to Cyrus.

Sam goes into Charlie’s, where Kristina is working behind the bar. She asks if Sam wants her usual; cream, no sugar. Sam says Kristina knows her well, but she came to see how Kristina is doing, since she’s been preoccupied with Molly. Kristina says, for once, her life is drama free. Julian gave her a raise she didn’t ask for. She doesn’t know what she did to make him feel guilty enough to pay her extra. Sam says it’s nothing Kristina did; it’s what Julian did. He made trouble for their mom.

Alexis meets Neil, who’s now sporting a beard, at the MetroCourt. He says they have a lot to discuss. He didn’t want to do it at the hospital, since it’s so public, and since he can’t practice there, he doesn’t have an office. She says she’s sorry his license was revoked, and he says, never mind him. What about her? She says she hasn’t heard from the Bar. She knows they’ll have an issue with her lying under oath, but it’s not an issue that she slept with him, so there’s that. They can be seen in public like normal people. He says, it’s like a first date.

Sonny is waiting for Carly in her office, and she asks how it went. He says, with Mike? Not good. She asks if he got her text, and he says, sorry. His phone was on silent. He’s been looking at the remodel, and thinks she did a fantastic job. She asks if he really likes it, and he says, it seems unfair. They want to remodel, so they find an architect, approve the designs, and pay for it. Problem solved. With his father, it doesn’t matter how much money he spends, how many doctors he talks to, or what tests they run. He’s losing his father to the disease a little more every day, and there’s nothing he can do about it. She hugs him, and he says, sorry. What was her text about? She says, Cyrus Renault.

Cyrus looks around, and Lulu asks if he’s worried his enemies are lurking and going to take him out during the interview. He says his only enemy there seems to be Carly. Lulu says she can smooth things over there, but Cyrus was allegedly involved in a turf war, so Carly’s husband might be a different matter. He says he reached out to Sonny, one businessman to another, but Sonny wasn’t interested. Sonny might have been misled by his wrongful conviction. She asks him to tell her about it, and he says, corrupt members of law enforcement manufactured evidence that put him in prison. Now he’s free to make a fresh start in Port Charles. She asks what his profession is, and he says he’s an investor. She asks what kinds of things he invests in, and he says, whatever catches his interest and is profitable. It’s all open and above board. She asks how his investments came to the attention of the DEA. We flash back to Jordan visiting Cyrus in prison. He says Jordan had been his right hand, and asks if she remembers those days. Do they haunt her; the things she did? Jordan says he gave the orders, and made things happen, and he asks if she was always a traitor, or did someone turn her? She asks what he thinks, and he says if she came to embarrass him, mission accomplished. To admit one traitor is a mistake, but four? To paraphrase, Oscar Wilde, it sounds like carelessness. He hopes her associates are okay.

Cyrus tells Lulu that he’s a very successful man who’s making a lot of money. People tend to be jealous. When they couldn’t find evidence, they invented it. She asks if he’s holding any grudges, but he says, absolutely not. He lives in the present, not the past. He sees his mission as improving lives and contributing to the betterment of the community. She says, it sounds noble, but the only way he can gain the support of her readers is to give more personal details. Why did he relocate? Does he have family or friends there? There’s nothing about his personal life online. Laura approaches the table, and he says her timing is impeccable. Lulu says, mom? and he says, Laura is her mother? He should have put it together; two attractive, intelligent women being related. Laura says he didn’t do his homework on her? How careless. She did all of her homework on him.

Alexis says if Neil wants to fight the accreditation board – and she thinks he should – count her in. He thinks it’s too soon for his next move, and she says, nothing is stopping them or getting in the way of them seeing each other. Neil says they can finally discover why they can’t resist the urge to be together, no matter what the cost. We flash back to Alexis and Neil meeting at the opera, and Neil coming to her hotel room later. He says that’s why he invited her; to find out what’s next for both of them.

Jason stands on the pier, and we flash back to the early days when he, Sam, and the rest of us were all infants. We see Sam pregnant; the two of them vowing their love forever; dancing at the Chinese restaurant; goofing around, and Jason winning a stuffed toy for Sam at the fair. We move to them being on the run, getting busy, and getting married. We go back to Jason rescuing Sam from the water when he came back after five years, and revealing himself to her at the hospital. We see them watching fireworks on the Haunted Star, escaping the earthquake, and Sam telling Jason she never stopped loving him.

Kristina asks Sam what Julian did to their mom, but Sam thinks Alexis should tell her. She always finds her courage. Kristina says, cryptic, but true. Brando comes in, and asks if his order is ready. Kristina asks his name, and he says, Brando Corbin. Sam says, as in Mike? and he says, Mike is his second cousin. Kristina says, that makes them cousins too, and introduces herself and Sam. She says Sonny is her dad. He’s not Sam’s dad, but she’s a qualifying Corinthos. Brando says Sam is a heroine, but Sam says she wouldn’t take it that far. He says she rescued Dev from Shiloh. It was a messed up situation. He doesn’t get how anyone can fall for that mumbo jumbo cult stuff. We flash back to Kristina telling Jason about Dawn of Day, and that it’s the best thing that ever happened to her. We see Molly telling Kristina, it’s all she talks about. Kristina says, it transformed her life, and Molly says, more like taken over. We move to Jason rescuing Kristina.

Felix sees TJ is back work, on crutches no less. Impressive, and a touch masochistic. TJ says he missed a lot of work. It’s time to get back in the game. Felix asks if he remembers anything, and TJ says he’s trying. Felix says he will. Molly comes by, and hopes TJ is checking his every move with his orthopedist. She doesn’t think making the rounds on crutches is good for his leg. He says she’s already in domestic partner mode, then asks if that sounds clinical. She says they’re the most romantic words she ever heard. She’s just making sure he’s okay. She’s meeting her sisters at Charlie’s. She’s going to let them know that she and TJ are going to be an official couple in the eyes of the law. He says, sorry he can’t drive her. When is her car out of the shop? She says, soon she hopes. He’s glad she wasn’t hurt, and she says, who knew going over a curb could cause so much trouble? He says she knows he’d never leave her. We flash back to Jordan telling Molly to get over TJ. He doesn’t want to see her. Grow up, and accept there are consequences for her actions. She broke TJ’s heart.

Molly tells TJ, she knows now. Even his mom thought he’d ghosted her. She tells him, go save some lives. She’ll see him soon.

Jordan tells Curtis, the department can’t tie TJ’s abduction to Cyrus. Cyrus might hurt TJ even worse. Curtis says, if they don’t, Cyrus is free to set up shop, using her to make it easy. She says she has a pretty good idea of what Cyrus is planning. How does she stop him without risking TJ’s life, or his, or the lives of everyone she loves?

Carly tells Sonny, Lulu asked Cyrus to meet her at the MetroCourt for an interview, so she couldn’t throw him out. Sonny says, Laura must have told Lulu Cyrus was a threat, and Carly says she guesses Lulu picked the MetroCourt because she felt safe. Cyrus is a free man. Sonny says, he had Lulu’s mother shot, but until they can prove it, he’s just another businessman. Jason arrives, and says Cyrus is at the MetroCourt. Carly says she was just telling Sonny, and Sonny asks if Jason had any pushback from canceling the meeting. Jason says, Cyrus wasn’t happy, but Mike is more important. Sonny says he was thinking about it, and Mike started going downhill after the ambush in Brooklyn. We flash back to Mike telling Sonny, he doesn’t want to do this anymore; Mike saying he saying doesn’t know Brando; and telling Sonny that he’s tired. Mike tells Sonny, once they’re back in Bensonhurst, it will be all right.

Carly tells Sonny, Mike was going down before that. That’s why Sonny wanted to get him into the Alzheimer’s trial. Sonny says, afterwards, Mike was so shaken, he couldn’t go back to enroll. A lost opportunity to improve Mike’s brain function. Jason says, maybe, and Sonny says, you never know. Cyrus tried to take him out in front of his father.

Jordan wonders if she should go to the Feds and confess that she’s just as culpable, but Curtis says, no. She’ll go to prison, and Cyrus will remain free. She says she could tell them about TJ being abducted, and Curtis says, based on what? She knows how well Cyrus covers his tracks. Is there any guarantee they’ll find proof? We flash back to Cyrus telling Jordan there’s not much to do in solitary, except be philosophical. Thinking about all the wrongs he has left to right. She asks what he wants; obviously, it’s not to kill her.

Jordan tells Curtis, maybe TJ will remember something incriminating. He says, a moment ago, she was hoping he wouldn’t.

Mac asks TJ if he’s got a minute, and TJ says he was about to take a break. Mac says they’re doing everything to find out who abducted him, and TJ says, Chase took his statement. Mac says he thought he’d follow up and see if TJ remembers anything new. TJ says he’s thought a lot about it, but nothing comes to mind. Mac says, any detail, even if it seems insignificant, will help.

Kristina says she’ll check on Brando’s order, and goes into the kitchen. Brando asks Sam if he said something wrong, and she says, Kristina was part of DoD. She escaped, but it was a long and painful process. It was scary for the family – and Kristina. Next time, Brando might want to keep his opinions to himself. Kristina comes back with his order, and says he paid online, so they’re good. He says, no; they’re not. He wants to apologize. He was out of line. Molly looks through the window, and sees Brando talking with Kristina. We flash back to Molly being at the garage and kissing Brando. We see her finding out TJ was kidnapped, and telling Brando, it was a mistake and never happened.

Neil says, Alexis has to admit, it’s been an insane couple of weeks. She asks what the odds are that they’d be seated next to each other at the opera, and Britt would be in the same hotel. Neil says, and Alexis telling her ex about it. Alexis still can’t believe Julian felt justified to attack Neil like a feral Neanderthal. Then announcing she and Neil slept together. At the hospital. He says maybe if they hadn’t slept together and lied about it, Sam wouldn’t have said what she did. Alexis says Sam’s words weren’t as hurtful as her taking a drink. She asks if he’s angry; he sounds angry. He says that’s because he is, and she asks, at her or himself. He says, both.

Brando tells Kristina, he’s sorry for making a snap judgement. He didn’t know his mouth was big enough for a size 10. She says, you learn something new every day, and he says let him make it up to her. Whenever her car needs something, come to his shop, and he’ll give her a discount. He leaves, and Kristina says, he couldn’t offer it for free? which is exactly what I was thinking. Sam says, he’s just an opinionated jerk. Outside, Molly asks Brando what he’s doing there. He says, picking up food, and she asks why he was talking to her sisters.

Mac tells TJ, start at the beginning. What he remembers before the abduction. TJ says he was upset about something personal, and figured he’s walk it off, and clear his head. Mac asks if he remembers where he was, but TJ isn’t sure. He heard a car behind him, as he was about to reach the corner. Elm and 10th. Mac says, it’s deserted there at night, and TJ says, the next thing he knew, they jumped him. They wrestled him to the sidewalk, and put a sack over his head. Mac asks, how many? and TJ says, two. He tried to fight back, but they tied his hands and beat him up. Mac says, keep going, and TJ says he thinks he blacked out. The next thing he remembers is being in the back of a van; there was a sense of room. The muffler was loud, and woke him up. He thought he might be concussed, so he tried to stay awake. Mac asks if he remembers which way they were headed, and TJ says, after a few left turns, they stopped. He heard a train horn. Mac says, the nearest crossing by Elm and 10th is Dockery. How long was the ride? TJ thinks ten or fifteen minutes. They chloroformed him before he could identify anyone. He came to in a basement. Mac asks if he remembers any sounds or smells, and TJ says he remembers both.

Curtis tells Jordan, going to the Feds isn’t an option. If they haul Cyrus in based on her word, and can’t find a shred of evidence, they’ll be forced to let him go. Cyrus will be out in Port Charles, thinking of a way to get even. Jordan says, unless she tells them about Harmony. Harmony can cut a deal, and  they can put her in the witness protection program. Curtis loves her crystal ball, but as soon as Cyrus finds out Harmony is talking, she’s a dead woman, along with anyone willing to turn state’s evidence. We flash back to Cyrus saying, no locked, windowless room, no mayor, no Commissioner, nothing can keep a determined man from getting what he wants.

Jordan tells Curtis, she’s boxed in, with nothing to do but cooperate.

Cyrus tells Lulu, her mother is concerned for his safety. She insisted he return to Seattle, but when he said he wanted to make his home there, she told him that if he was killed, she’d bring his perpetrators to justice. Lulu says her mother cares about all of her constituents, no matter who they are. He says he’s proud to call himself one of Port Charles’s citizens, and he’s going to work hard be an asset. He’s going to start by contributing to Laura’s campaign.

Sonny tells Carly and Jason, Elizabeth thinks his father should have a DNR. Carly asks what Sonny thinks, and he says, he thinks it’s too soon. Jason says Elizabeth is the best nurse there, and Sonny says, she also suggested palliative care. If something happens, they’ll make sure Mike is in no pain, but they can’t give him treatment. Carly asks what Mike thinks, and Sonny says, Mike didn’t say a lot. He was unfocused. They did have a great moment when he was feeding Mike. Mike liked it, and he could see his dad was still in there. Sonny smiles.

On Monday, Laura looks forward to hearing Cyrus’s decision, Alexis gets an email from the NY Bar Association, and Sonny wants to get it over with.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Ramona apologizes not giving Lu Ann her room. LuAnn says, it’s not about that. It’s that she wasn’t considered, and she was hurt. The spiders and the smell were the worst. She says Ramona knows she’s not a spoiled brat. Ramona says she was wrong, and please come back. LuAnn says she’s going to kick Ramona’s ass at tennis, and she’s sleeping at her own house. Leah says, only in the Hamptons is it like, bitch, I’ll see you on the tennis court. Dorinda doesn’t want to go to the party tonight, and wants to stay home. In Ramona’s interview, she says, it’s her friend’s birthday party in Sag Harbor. She loves the women, but not that much. She wants to get some action; food, wine, dancing, and men. She reminds Sonja about how Elyse called her a trophy wife, and she kept telling Elyse to take it back. Tinsley says, then Sonja threw it on her. Sonja says she was a hard-working wife, and Tinsley says she was too. Sonja asks where the shoe repair place was in her neighborhood, and Tinsley says she’s not getting on this loop. In Leah’s interview, she says, the first rule of a trophy wife is, if you have to explain why you weren’t a trophy wife, you probably were a trophy wife. Leah says Sonja said the same thing to Tinsley that she found offensive.

Tennis coach Adriano comes to Ramona’s. In her interview, she says he’s the hottest tennis pro in Hamptons. LuAnn arrives, and in her interview, says she doesn’t think Ramona stuck her in the basement on purpose; Ramona just doesn’t think. LuAnn isn’t letting it ruin her weekend. She tells Ramona, don’t try to be nice; it’s not her M.O. Ramona says even though there’s a party tonight, she’s going to hang out with her friends, since they’re more important. Dorinda comes out, and asks if their midnight rider is back. In Dorinda’s interview, Ramona uses the 80s method of hiring people. They have to be good-looking, fit, and somewhat datable. This has nothing to do with tennis. LuAnn is competitive, and wants to beat Ramona, and Ramona will just pretend to play while her boobs are hanging out. LuAnn wins the match. Dorinda says she’s never played, and plays better than Ramona.

Leah tells Tinsley, she loves Sonja, but Sonja needs to stop saying she married the bank. We see a clip of drunk Sonja yapping about her private island and yacht. She says, it’s sad that Sonja won’t move on. In Leah’s interview, she says it’s strange how she knows so much about the life Sonja used to live, but nothing about the life she’s living now. The yacht has sailed, and she needs to get over it. LuAnn grills Adriano on his personal life, and he says it’s hard to meet someone in Manhattan. LuAnn says it could happen when he least expects it. It could happen today. He’s like, maybe not.

Ramona has problems with the grill, while Dorinda makes frozé. In her interview, Dorinda thinks what LuAnn went through was intense and difficult, but she’s getting past it. Ramona bitches about no one helping, and whines that there’s no silverware out. Leah explains the silverware is in the napkins. Dorinda and LuAnn get pissed about how Ramona is talking to Leah. In Dorinda’s interview, she wonders if they’re staying there, or working for Ramona. What’s the hourly wage? Leah says that’s how her family talks to each other, and in her interview, says she was raised to respect her elders, so she lets Ramona get away with it – for now. Ramona screeches for help with the grill. In her interview, she says Mario was always in charge of grilling.

They sit down to eat, and Ramona says she was telling LuAnn about their conversation on vulnerability. She asks if LuAnn would like to add something. LuAnn says it’s hard for her not to drink. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, the hard part is knowing she can drink if she wants, but is choosing not to. Right now, she wishes she was back in the game with the girls. She tells them, it’s a challenge for her, and the first time she’s felt that way in a while. In Sonja’s interview, she says she’s proud of where LuAnn is; that she can be open and honest. LuAnn says it would be fine if she drank, but she’d be upset with herself. In her interview, she says she made a resolve not to drink. In Leah’s interview, she says there’s probably so much going through LeeAnn’s mind. The same stuff was going through hers when she decided to start drinking, but LuAnn has to make that decision for herself. Ramona says she’s proud of LuAnn.

Dog groomers Ed and Michael arrive to groom Sonja’s Marley. In LuAnn’s interview, she says Michael is a hot guy. She’d like to be groomed. Sonja says, it’s a full-service house, with tennis and dog grooming, and delivers Marley to them. Michael bathes Marley in the sink, and LuAnn asks if he needs help. She tells him that she has a Westie. Ramona comes in, and in her interview, she says, if there’s a man in the house, LuAnn is on it. People think she’s the biggest flirt, but LuAnn is. Marley also gets a massage, and Michael massages LuAnn’s neck. She says he has great hands, and asks if he makes house calls. Sonja dances in front of the dog hair dryer.

They get ready for dinner, having decided to stay in. Dorinda says she doesn’t do well at big parties, and she’s bored with herself. Tinsley says she’s a stage mom with her dogs. Leah asks if Ramona needs help, but Ramona says, no, and Dorinda says Ramona would just yell at her anyway. Leah says she’s glad they’re staying in. She doesn’t have to worry about any weird white guys showing up. Weird white guy Jeff arrives. Ramona says he’s a friend, makes great lasagna, and is a great pianist. Leah says, it’s a p*ssy party, and wonders why there’s one penis in the room. In Ramona’s interview, she says everyone is going to her friend’s party, but the girls didn’t want to go. She tells Sonja that she called different guys, and he’s the only one who showed up. Leah drinks out of a glass that she thought was cranberry juice, and Tinsley tells her there’s vodka in there. In Tinsley’s interview, she thinks as long as she’s around, Leah won’t go off the deep end… hopefully… maybe… They play beer pong with plastic champagne glasses. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, they’re more like frat guys getting wasted. There are times she misses drinking, but tonight isn’t one of them. She can’t help but watch, and think, is this how she was when she was drunk? Elyse joins them, and Sonja attacks Tinsley with a vibrator. Jeff wisely decides to make an exit. Sonja says, this is the best party ever.

Dorinda says Ramona hurt her feelings, saying she’d be done with John in two years. We see a clip of Ramona saying just that to a guy at the party the night before. LuAnn says, Ramona is so insensitive. Outside, Tinsley says she’s getting naked, and Leah says she’s going stir crazy. There’s only so much talk about yachts and declassé she can take. Leah and Tinsley get in the pool, Tinsley in her underwear, and Leah without anything. Leah tries to put out a torch by flinging Dom Perignon at it. Inside, Dorinda says, it’s not always great with John, but he’s different choice for her. She accepted John into her life as a friend, and he’s family to her now. She’s about the foundation of the house. Ramona says, what if John is getting girl’s phone numbers? Would Dorinda be upset?  Dorinda asks why she’s saying that. It’s an a-hole thing to say. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, one thing she knows for sure, John never flirted with Ramona. LuAnn asks why Ramona is rolling her eyes, and Ramona says one of the girls told her John was getting numbers. In Ramona’s interview, she says Dorinda became a different person after John, and she’s not totally happy. Ramona thinks Dorinda realizes it down deep. Elyse says Ramona is mean, and in LuAnn’s interview, she says, Ramona has no bedside manner. She’s the Dr. Kevorkian of delivering messages. Sonja goes outside, and Leah says, take it off – now. Leah flings a torch across the lawn, and Sonja flings another one. Leah chases her around the pool, and says she hates the torches. Sonja gets nakey, and gets in the pool with a bottle of champagne. She says she feels young and fun. Leah says Dorinda is judging them, but Sonja says, Dorinda’s not judgy.

Dorinda tells Ramona, don’t say anything mean again. In Ramona’s interview, she says, no one could get that John wasn’t like Richard. He’s not as well-spoken, intelligent, or dignified. We flash back to John asking Ramona to leave one of Dorinda’s parties, with Ramona looking pretty undignified herself. Ramona says, people wonder what Dorinda is doing with him. Tinsley takes her top off, and Leah tells LuAnn to get in the pool. LuAnn says, let her think about it, and goes back inside. Which means she didn’t even have to think about it. It’s just no.

LuAnn tells the others, the girls are in the pool naked. Leah, Tinsley, and Sonja come back inside. In LuAnn’s interview, she says she can’t believe Tinsley. She won’t even wear a bathing suit without a wrap. What would Dale think? Leah comes in wearing a sheer top with no bra, and Dorinda tells her to cover up. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it’s too much. For the first time in a long time, she’s speechless. She steers Leah into one of the bedrooms. We hear her comment that Leah’s lady parts have wings, and Leah comes back out, wearing a leopard bustier under her blouse. Tinsley slurps spaghetti. Ramona says she’s leaving for the party, and LuAnn can’t believe it. In Ramona’s interview, she says all of them were invited. They’re going to drink themselves to sleep, and she’s not staying home. She tells Sonja that she’s seeing her superficial friends. In Sonja’s interview, she says, this is a new low. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, you shouldn’t leave your guests. Ramona gets the worst hostess award. Elyse says, Ramona has to go. The cost might be that she doesn’t meet a man. Sonja gets loud and animated, bringing up Elyse saying she was just an accessory when she was married. Leah says, that ship sailed, but Sonja says she wants to talk about what Elyse said. Leah yells, 1985 is over! In her interview, Sonja wonders when the party became occupy the Hamptons, She says Leah has a chip on her shoulder, and Sonja says Dorinda didn’t want her to put the family logo on her shoes. We flash back to Dorinda saying she thought it was mortifying. Sonja says she’s in the Blue Book. I fail to see how this is some kind of great achievement, but then again, I’m not in the Blue Book. Sonja and Leah scream at each other for a minute. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, maybe this is why Leah stopped drinking. Leah tells Tinsley not to get socialite on her, and Sonja calls Leah a hater. Leah says she’s not. She just wants Sonja to let it go. Sonja goes in the bathroom, saying, Leah never lived it. Leah follows her, and Sonja gets in Leah’s face, saying, Tinsley built a brand based on marrying a Mortimer. They end up hugging it out, although I’ll be damned if I know how they got there. Elyse says, if they all went into group therapy, the therapist would end up in an asylum.   

The next morning, it’s a mess outside – tikis everywhere, broken glass, a champagne bottle floating in the pool. Dorinda demands that Sonja do some facial masks with her. In Sonja’s interview, she says she feels hurt about Leah’s assumptions. She tells Dorinda, Ramona is going to go apesh*t. Leah is downstairs when Ramona sees the mess. The kitchen is also a nightmare, food everywhere, a pair of glasses in a wineglass, and a vibrator in a plate of chicken. I don’t even want to think about it. I also have to say it. I have gotten my drink on in my day, but I have never trashed a place. Not once. And I’ve been to some wild parties and seedy bars. Ramona says she has to laugh or she’ll cry. She’s actually taking it better than I would. Leah says she doesn’t want to look outside, so Ramona goes outside. She says, not cool. In her interview, she says, talk about no respect. She yells for Dorinda and Sonja to get their asses down there. In her interview, Leah says, her memory is a little cloudy… Oh yeah, the tiki torches. She remembers getting mad at them.

Sonja brushes Marley’s hair, and Dorinda says, that’s her brush. Sonja says, sorry; she’s used to doing that. Ramona stomps upstairs, and they hide under the blanket. Ramona says she feels like getting the strap out like her father did. She asks what went on outside? and Dorinda says Ramona left her own party. Ramona says she’s on a mission to find a partner, and she got a date. Sonja says, there’s something new, and outs Leah for throwing a tiki torch, but admits she threw one too. Dorinda says she wasn’t a part of it. Ramona goes back down to the kitchen, which Leah has somehow miraculously cleaned up in a New York minute. Ramona says she was informed that Leah started the tiki fight. In Leah’s interview, she says sometimes she’s extra, and sometimes she drinks extra. She didn’t hurt anyone. Ramona asks her to at least pick up the torches. In her interview, Ramona says, Leah is no dumb cookie. She’d said she hadn’t done it, but cleaned up the kitchen so fast, Ramona can hardly be angry at her.

Ramona tells Dorinda, she’s never woken up to a kitchen looking like that, but Dorinda says she can’t expect her guests to clean at night. She hires help when she has guests, and Ramona should have stayed there. She could have initiated them all cleaning up together. Leah is surprised that Ramona left, having not noticed the night before. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she knows what it’s like. Ramona has cajones. She tells Ramona, karma’s a bitch, and tells Leah about Ramona ripping the lights off the bedroom walls in Dorinda’s house in the Berkshires. We flash back to that, and Dorinda saying she was horrified. Ramona says she was fine until she went outside. Leah says, it’s not that bad; she thinks the kitchen was worse.

Ramona and Dorinda go outside, and Dorinda agrees, saying, it’s ridiculous. It’s like a frat house. Leah says she takes responsibility for the torches. She felt like she was in Game of Thrones. Dorinda says she thought she was at the Playboy mansion. Dorinda wonders where Tinsley is, and we see her tucked into bed, the plate of leftover spaghetti next to her.

Next time, Sonja has a show at New York Fashion Week, Tinsley talks about her mother, and Leah thinks Sonja is full of sh*t and passive/aggressive.

👩🏼‍🍳 On Top Chef, in the Quickfire challenge, the chefs had to make a dish using flour, but not all purpose flour. This time, there would be no immunity, but to soften the blow, the winner would receive $5000. The guest judge was award winning chef and restaurateur Chris Bianco. I was shocked at flours I’d never heard of. Tapioca flour? Garbanzo bean flour? What? Bryan full of Malarkey went for a second try with ice cream, even though his first one was a disaster. The ice cream came out fine, but the donut that was supposed to go with it, never made it to the plate at all. Gregory was the winner, with some tapioca flour pancakes topped with maple syrup, although whatever he called them sounded fancier than that.

For the elimination challenge, in celebration of the 100th season of the L.A. Philharmonic, the chefs would be feeding Gustavo Dudamel, the L.A. Philharmonic’s conductor, and 60 members of his orchestra at Otium restaurant. The guest judge would be Timothy Collingwood, owner of Otium. The chefs chose knives from the five flavor profiles – salty, sweet, sour, bitter, and umami (savory). The chefs paired up, and their two flavor profiles had to make a cohesive dish together. It was going to be a double-elimination. For inspiration, the chefs went to the Walt Disney Concert Hall, where conductor Gustavo, who started his career when he was eleven (!), talked to them about how food was like art, and he liked the similarities between food and music.

It was back to work, and Lee Anne, who had the misfortune of being paired with full of Malarkey, said shopping with him was like shopping with monkeys on crack.

The judges were looking for the team who was true to the challenge, the flavor profile, and themselves. Melissa and Kevin were the winners with a salty and sweet cabbage thing. When it was time to decide who was going, and the judges talked among themselves, Padma looked as stern as I’ve ever seen her. Gail said two chefs would be going home for fantastic food, and it felt wrong. They’re now at that point, as happens in every competition, where everyone is good, and they have to get picky. Nini and Karen had to pack their knives and go for their umami and sour fish offering. In her interview, Karen said there wasn’t just a personal sadness, but a double layer of guilt. Nini said her curse was to be in a double elimination. Tom told them not to go just yet, as they were going right into Last Chance Kitchen. Thanks for the warning.

Next time, not only will the chefs be using a machete, Machete will be there when Danny Trejo (one of my favorites) is a guest.

🥜 Sometimes You Feel Like a Weekend…

We’ve gotten to that time in the week that feels weird for some of you right now. Tomorrow’s Friday, but it doesn’t have that buoyant feel it did not that long ago. That’s right, it wasn’t that long ago, it won’t be long now, and you’re still here. Relax. Stay safe, stay watching TV that’s not all news, and stay in your lane. Or not.